A Compromise

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/27834154.

Rating: Explicit
Archive Warning: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Category: F/M
Fandom: The Walking Dead (TV)
Relationship: Negan (Walking Dead)/Original Female Character(s), Negan (Walking
Dead)/You, Negan/reader
Character: Negan (Walking Dead), Shane Walsh
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Smut, Age Difference, Light Dom/sub, Sugar Daddy,
Eventual Smut, Older Man/Younger Woman, Romance, Angst, Sweet
Negan (Walking Dead), Protective Negan (Walking Dead), Gentle
Negan (Walking Dead), Nice Negan (Walking Dead), Time Jump,
marriage problems, Cheating, severe angst, mid life crisis, Bad
Parenting, I know nothing about being a lawyer so I am making shit up
as I go
Language: English
Stats: Published: 2020-12-02 Updated: 2023-06-23 Words: 226,213 Chapters:
20/?

A Compromise
by NaughtyNeganJDM

Summary

After getting expelled from college for a reason Y/N finds unfair, she is in eager need of
money. During a fight with her father, her new neighbor across the street, Negan, hears her
problem and offers to pay her to spend time with him. It's an offer that she can't deny,
leading to a unique relationship between the two.

Notes

This is going to be a shorter series than the other ones I've done. I was requested to write a
story where Negan was the 'sugar daddy' to a character and this is what I've come up with. I
hope this will be okay with what was requested of me. As always, Y/N means your name or
if you just want to put in a random name, do that instead. Thanks for reading.
 Chapter 1

“You know, I find this a bit counterproductive,” Y/N followed her father out of their home toward
the front yard. She was desperate to have a serious conversation with her father who was eager to
avoid the conflict. “You would think after what happened to me, you would be eager to support me
through everything.”

“Y/N, you were expelled from university,” her father reminded her as he headed for the back of his
car to pull something out of the trunk. “I’m not just going to hand over money to you so you can
enjoy yourself while you are back at home.”

“I’m not here because I wanted to be dad,” Y/N bickered with her father feeling frustrated with his
reaction toward her being expelled from college. “You know I’m attempting to make an appeal
with the board for what happened.”

“What you did was wrong,” her father retorted with a snort, pushing through some of the items that
were in the trunk of his car. “I’m not changing my mind about this. You need to find yourself a job
if you want money. You’re not getting any handouts after what you did.”

“Dad, you have to acknowledge that this is a situation where I think you should be a little bit more
understanding. I went to my professor to ask for help because I was having trouble understanding
why I was getting the grades I was getting. I knew I was doing everything right,” Y/N reminded her
father of the story that she had told him about what started the events to her being expelled from
college. “For someone who has a daughter, I would think you would be furious to know that he
told me he would give me a better grade if I did sexual favors for him.”

“You kicked him in the balls sweetheart,” her father blurt out with an irritated sound, lifting up
enough to meet his daughter’s desperate expression.

The sound of a muted laugh filled the air and it caught the attention of Y/N who looked across the
street to see the new neighbor washing his car. For a moment her eyes lingered when her eyes
connected with the hazel eyes of the stranger she had yet to meet. It was clear he had managed to
hear her discussion with her father and found it amusing. While she wanted to be angry that he was
being nosey in listening in on their discussion, she found herself staring. His dark hair was slicked
back from being wet. When he noticed her staring at him, he winked and reached up to brush his
fingers over the side of his stubble covered cheek before going back to washing his car.

A warmth pressed in over her face when she realized she had been caught staring at him. His white
t-shirt was damp against his slender form and she couldn’t help, but survey over his long, lengthy
legs. With focusing on school, it really had been so long since she had gotten to enjoy the touch of
a man and she could tell that with the way the sight of their new neighbor made her feel. He was
stunning and it was hard not to stare.

“As I said, I’m not changing my mind,” her father interrupted her focus and she had to shake her
head to pull her attention away from the handsome older stranger across the street. “You could
have handled things so much better.”

“You would think you wouldn’t be so misogynistic about this dad. He was forcing himself on me
and I kicked him to defend myself,” she fought back with her father, still having a hard time
understanding why her parents were so defiant against helping her. The memory was still fresh in
her mind and she realized it was probably not good for her to be lusting over her new neighbor
when she was thinking about the situation. “I thought you would be proud of me for being able to
fight him off.”

“Sure, if that’s where you stopped,” her father grumbled, finally finding the tool he was looking for
before closing the trunk. The way her father folded his arms out in front of his chest frustrated her.
“If you would have stopped there, I could have helped fight this for you.”

“You act like what I did was a bad thing,” she rolled her eyes and slumped down, her eyes glancing
back across the street to get a look at the neighbor who seemed to be very casually washing his car
and she wondered if he was purposely being that way to listen in on their fight.

“You shattered the windows of his car and set the inside on fire. I think that’s a pretty bad thing,”
her father snapped back and she heard the cough that came from across the street. It was hard not to
make a comment as she looked back to see him smirking. It was obvious he was biting down on
his cheeks hard to make sure he didn’t laugh and it drew attention to his dimples. If she wasn’t
getting annoyed with him, she might have found it quite charming, but at the moment she found
him to be a nosey asshole. “There is a reason you were expelled sweetheart.”

“Okay, first of all...if I did do that, I had every right to,” she explained with a shrug of her
shoulders. “I went to the dean about what happened and of course he was a sexist piece of shit that
refused to believe what happened. The old man told me that there was no proof that what I said
happened was true.”

“And you could have fought that without going to those extremes,” her father raised his voice and
she found herself embarrassed knowing that their new neighbor across the street likely was hearing
everything. “They have video proof of you setting the fire in the teacher’s parking lot. I don’t
know how you think that you will be able to appeal this.”

“Allegedly,” she shrugged her shoulders and caught the glare her father gave her. “We’ll see if they
can provide the video of that when the time comes.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” her father jeered and she simply shrugged. She had
devised a plan as to how to deal with that, but she still needed the money to make sure that she had
a backup in case her original plan failed. “There is only so much someone can do to help you
sweetheart.”

“He tried to rape me dad,” she fought back with an exasperated sound. “First he tried to manipulate
me. He wanted me to do sexual acts on him before even considering helping me with my grade.”

“I’m not saying I don’t believe you,” her father countered with an empathetic sigh. “You were
doing so good and then you just, did this. I can’t hand money over to you to just do whatever you
want because then it would show I was supporting what you have done. After putting in all the
hard work you did during high school and the first few years of college, I can’t believe you let it
get to this.”

“Would you be acting this way if I was a male?” she pressed, catching the way that her father
rolled his eyes. “I think things are this way because I’m a female. I think you just expected me to
lie down and take it instead of defending myself.”

“You know that’s not true,” her father argued, clasping the tool tightly at his side. “The problem
comes in that there is no proof to what you have said and there is proof that you did what you did
to his car.”

“Allegedly,” she repeated her earlier comment and watched her father throw his hands up in a
frustrated manner. “In order for me to be able to fight this or do anything, I need money. You were
giving me money at school. I find it ridiculous that you refuse to give me that same money until I
can figure it out.”

“We were attempting to make sure you were living life easily while you were studying so you
could focus on your schoolwork,” her father stated with an exhausted breath, “you’re no longer
doing your studies, so we’re no longer going to provide that money for you. If you want money,
you need to get a job. I really believed in you. I didn’t want you to have to go through the pressures
of having a job while also having to study. I wanted you to put all of your time into your
schoolwork and that’s why I was eager to help you. Now, you need that job.”

“This is ridiculous,” she snorted, throwing her hands down at her sides. “You would think you
would want to support me through this.”

“I support you, but I support you getting a job,” her father almost mocked her. Accepting defeat,
she realized she was losing this battle and knew her father wasn’t breaking. She had been fighting
with him for almost an hour and found herself overwhelmed that he wasn’t budging. “Be like
everyone else. You’re an adult now, you don’t need us babying you.”

“I’m going to be able to go back to school dad and you are going to feel ridiculous that you didn’t
help me through this,” Y/N insisted knowing that she was going to fight the school’s decision to
expel her after what she went through.

“Great and I will be so proud of you when you are back in school. If that ever did happen, which is
highly unlikely…we may reconsider the whole money thing,” her father stammered, eager to get
back to the job he was working on before she started bickering with him. “Until then, I suggest you
get a job.”

“Any job I can get here will be something that I can’t put my full potential into,” she claimed and
her father shrugged dramatically again. “After all the work I’ve done with my education, you just
want me to take some kind of low paying job?”

“A job is a job Y/N, you need to learn to be levelheaded about life,” her father maintained looking
toward the house again, “It will be good for you to get a job. You’ll learn that everything is not
going to be handed to you and the value of things become more important to you when you earn
them yourself.”

“You’re teaching me a lesson now? When I’ve just gone through what I’ve gone through,” she was
flustered with his response and found herself angry that he was so against understanding her
situation. “I’m better than any job I’ll be able to find here dad.”

“A little humility wouldn’t hurt,” her father reached out to squeeze her shoulder and nodded back
toward the house. “Now if you will excuse me, I’m going to head back and finish what I was
doing.”

“Without a care in the world as to how I’m going to fix all of this,” she sarcastically replied
watching her father roll his eyes before heading back inside.

An overwhelming frustration filled her entire body and she found herself in rage over what
happened. She questioned if her family even believed her when she told them that her professor
tried to assault her. It was something that truly happened and she hated that because she reacted
‘badly’ to the whole thing that people were holding everything against her. So what if there was
proof that she may have done that to her professor’s car? Her parents should have believed her
when she told them she was assaulted. They should have been just as enraged as she was. Instead,
they believed she deserved to be expelled for what had happened and that hurt.
In her opinion, the professor was lucky that she didn’t do more to him. Kicking him in the balls and
destroying his car was the least of his worries compared to what she wanted to do to him. After
working as hard as she did in school, she was blown away that it all came to an end because of
something like this.

Resting back against the car, she folded her arms in front of her chest and lifted her gaze to see the
stranger that had been listening in still washing his car. He was clearly finishing up and she could
tell he definitely wasn’t shy. When he noticed her staring at him, his eyes hooked on hers and a
ridiculously charming smile gradually cracked in over his lips.

Standing up straighter, she watched him continue to dry his mustang off with the towel he was
using before raising up. He tossed the towel aside and she felt her throat go dry. A chill pressed in
over her spine when she saw the man reach for the bottom of his shirt, lifting it slightly to reveal
his toned abdomen. The movement drew attention to the dark hair that was over his lower torso
and it drew more attention to the lines in his body.

The cocky smirk over his features made her realize that he caught onto the way she was gawking at
him and she lowered her gaze feeling embarrassed that she had been caught eyeing him over like
that. It’s not like she was even subtle about it. She was full on staring and it was clear that the older
man had caught on to it.

Lifting her head again, she saw him slowly lowering the material of his white t-shirt back down his
body and she cleared her throat when he lifted his other hand to wave. His fingers wiggled in
almost a teasing way and she waved back in what she assumed to be an awkward motion. Cussing
to herself, she lowered her head again and headed back toward the house.

What an awful way to be introduced to the new neighbor that had clearly moved in while she was
away at school. Of course, he had to be ridiculously good looking. Not only did he hear all of her
dirty laundry that was going on in her life, but he also obviously picked up on the fact that she
found him very attractive in that moment with her ogling him at the time.

Trying to avoid looking in that direction again, she went back into her home and headed into the
kitchen to drop down at the table. Her mind was still lingering on the new neighbor when her
mother moved into the room. When her mother spotted her, she could see that a sense of tension
filled her mother’s body. Obviously, her father had warned her mother about her previous fight
with him and her mother likely assumed that she would be fighting with her too. There was no
sense in it though because once her father said something, it was final. Even if her mother wanted
to give her money, her father would have never agreed to it.

“Hi…honey,” her mother went to the refrigerator to find something to prepare for dinner. Y/N
stayed silent, not sure of what to even say to her mother. She was angry at both of her parents, but it
was no use in trying to get them on her side of everything. They had their chance and they proved
to her what they thought about everything that happened.

“Hey mom,” she thought about the new neighbor and cleared her throat. It was the only thing that
had been able to pull her attention away from her anger toward her professor and school in quite
some time. It was an inappropriate thought after all the things she had been through, but she was
charmed by the sight of him and wanted to know more about him. “When did our neighbors across
the street move out?”

“About a month ago,” her mother let out a relieved sound when she realized that Y/N wasn’t about
to fight with her about money like she had clearly expected her to. “Why do you ask?”

“The new neighbor was out and he seems…odd,” Y/N answered honestly and her mother let out a
dramatic sound. “What?”

“Are you talking about Mr. Smith?” her mother questioned and Y/N dramatically threw her hands
up in the air. How would she know what the hell his name was? She just knew him as the nosy,
good looking neighbor across the street. “Negan. It’s only him there. We had him over for dinner
the first week he moved in.”

“Oh?” Y/N’s eyebrow perked up at that information. “Negan Smith. That’s quite the name.”

“Be nice dear,” her mother took notice of her sarcasm and Y/N rolled her eyes. “He’s a lovely man.
His story is really sad actually.”

“Sad?” she repeated her mother’s words thinking about the handsome stranger across the street.

“Yeah, he moved because his wife died of pancreatic cancer,” her mother thought back to when
they had invited Negan over for dinner to get to know their new neighbor. “The poor guy still
wears his wedding ring even though she’s gone. He up and left everything he knew and had to start
over new because being where he was just reminded him of her.”

“So, it was like an episode of Oprah while he was here?” Y/N almost joked and her mother gave
her an angered expression. Dramatically throwing her hands in the air, she realized that her mother
took his story serious and Y/N smirked. “I’m surprised he was so open with you about everything.
You don’t usually open up like that to someone you just met.”

“I made the mistake of asking about his wife when I saw his wedding ring,” her mother recalled
their conversation and shook her head. “He’s a very nice man. Works at the local high school.”

“Oh, I see,” she took in the details her mother had given her. He worked at the high school? Not
exactly what she would have imagined the mustang driving stranger to be…a teacher. “And you
like him?”

“He seems nice,” her mother reacted before heading back to start working on dinner again. “Did
you say hello to him?”

“In a way,” Y/N grumbled thinking about him listening in on her conversation with her father.
Sure, she had waved at him in probably a ridiculous fashion that would leave him more so amused
with her rather than finding her appealing in any way. It was embarrassing just thinking about their
interaction moments before. “Just not officially yet.”

“Well be friendly the next time you see him,” her mother ordered making Y/N groan at her
mother’s comment. “With all the negative that has gone on in his life, the best thing we can do is
be polite to that man. He needs it.”

“I’ll do my best mother,” she snorted, letting out a heavy breath. Maybe it was for the best to avoid
the new neighbor. While she found him to be…interesting, she doubted he would want to know her
any further than he had learned about her today. Hearing what she did to her professor probably
scared him off and that was that. It was best to just get him off her mind, if she could.

Staring out at the flashing lights before her, Y/N swallowed down hard and let out a disappointed
sound. Unfortunately, she had to swallow her pride and had to get a job. One of her friends let her
know about a job that was available at a local club doing waitressing at night. It had pretty good
tips and it would work with her schedule so she could do things during the earlier part of the day to
work toward her goals with school. Her friend told her that she could pretty much guarantee her a
position there as long as she came down and filled out an application. She would get to meet the
owner and would likely be able to start working immediately the next day.

Pushing through the crowd, she knew that she would have to get used to the loud music and the
overabundance of people surrounding her like this. If this was the best job she could get on a short
notice that paid decently then she would have to take it. Even if this made her feel…cheap?

Waiting for a while at the bar, she almost felt overwhelmed at the idea of working here. She
caught a glimpse at what she would be wearing every single night and it was obvious why they
made good tips. Wearing short skirts and low V-neck tops would definitely draw a certain crowd
and she realized that. At the end of the day, she just hoped she would only have to do it for a little
while before getting where she wanted to be.

Usually her nights were very quiet and spent studying. She really buried herself into her work when
she was at the university, so these kinds of places were rare for her. Sure, she had been to a few of
them, but she was more of a person that liked to be to herself away from people. The most
important thing to her was her future, so even the idea of working here kind of depressed her. It
was completely against who she was.

After meeting the owner of the club, it was pretty clear that she would be getting the job after she
filled out the paperwork which they left her to do. It was hard to get done with the loud music
filling the air around her and the constant elbows that continued to bump into her around the
surrounded bar. When she was almost done with filling everything out, she saw a shot being placed
beside her on the bar and she lifted her head to see the bartender staring out at her with a smirk.

“What is this? A welcome to the team shot?” she took a look at it and gave them a confused look.

“Tall, dark and handsome over there ordered it for you,” the bartender nodded toward the other
side of the bar and her eyes surveyed the bar until they landed on a familiar face. That new
neighbor she had spotted across the street was sitting at the bar talking to another woman and she
let out a tense breath.

“What is it?” Y/N looked to the drink and grabbed a hold of the shot glass, looking over the drink.

“It’s a blowjob,” the bartender answered and Y/N let out a disgusted breath realizing that it was
likely a joke referring to what he had heard with her fight with her father previously. “It’s Kahlua,
Irish Cream and whipped cream on top.”

“I see,” she smirked not knowing if she should take the drink over there to throw it in his face or
not. Getting down from her seat after grabbing the shot, she moved over toward the end of the bar
where he was at and boldly stepped between him and the woman he was talking to.

“Excuse me,” the woman let out an irritated breath behind her and Y/N held her hand up to silence
her. “We were having a discussion.”

“Not anymore you’re not,” Y/N looked over her shoulder at the other woman, her eyes narrowing
in an angry stare. It took a minute before the woman backed down and stepped back. An amused
laugh fell from her neighbor’s lips and she brought her attention back to him when the woman he
was with walked away. “You’re an asshole.”

“I’d like to think I’m more of a smartass, but that works too,” he reached for his beer and brought
the bottle to his lips to take a long swig of it. “You know, that was my date.”

“Negan, right?” she confirmed his name while completely ignoring his comment. His thick
eyebrows perked up. He nodded once before taking another large swallow of his drink. “What is
this?”

“It’s a shot,” Negan answered, his eyes looking down at what he ordered for her. “You looked
stressed, I thought you could use it.”

“Do you think you’re funny?” she looked toward the drink and set it on the bar before them.

“Kinda, yeah,” Negan snorted, a wolfish smile expanding over his good-looking features. It was
clear he was cocky and she didn’t know whether she was attracted to him or just ridiculously angry
at him. “I’m just fucking with you. Obviously, I heard your discussion with your father.”

“And what? You think I’m ridiculous too for what I did?” she snapped at him and Negan’s
eyebrow arched up, almost amused with her question. “I know you heard what I did.”

“Nah, I think it was fucking awesome what you did,” Negan replied almost immediately and he
shrugged his shoulders. “Personally, I think any man that tries to force themselves on a woman
should be castrated. I think what you did to the guy was nice in comparison to what I would have
done to him.”

“You’re the first person to think that,” she admitted and Negan frowned. She agreed with him. She
wanted to do so much worse to the professor, so the fact he thought it was awesome what she had
done intrigued her. “Everyone thinks I went too far.”

“Well I think you’re a badass,” Negan informed her with a wink and he set his beer back down on
the bar top. “Your parents don’t know what they are talking about. You’re special. I can tell.”

“Oh yeah?” she was almost amused with his comment. It was a little cheesy, yet her had her
hooked in that moment. “Why did you really buy me this?”

“Truthfully, I was thinking of the best way to get you over here to talk to me,” he confessed and
she felt her heart skip a beat at what he said.

“So you decided to piss me off?” she snapped at him and a small laugh escaped his throat.

“Well, you’re here…aren’t you?” Negan pointed out with a wiggle of his eyebrow, his deep voice
rasp and it caused her to shudder at just the sound of it. “So, it worked.”

“What? You weren’t enjoying your date?” Y/N looked over her shoulder to survey the area where
the woman that he was with had gone off to.

“You know you move to a new place and people are trying to hook you up with someone they
know because they think you would just make the most perfect couple,” Negan mocked what he
had clearly heard from those that he had just met after moving into the subdivision. “She was
boring. You are far more interesting.”

“How did you know that I was old enough to have that?” she looked down at the drink and his eyes
were locked on hers.

“Are you?” he slurred, his tongue drawing a wet line over his bottom lip.

“Does it matter?” she replied, trying to read his expression. “How old are you?”

“Does it matter?” he repeated her previous statement and it made her smile. “Older than you.”

“Obviously,” she grunted, reaching out to trace her fingers over the shot glass. The salt and pepper
coloring of his short beard told her he was likely much older than her, but she didn’t care. Taking a
moment to think things over, she brought the shot glass to her lips. Her eyes were hooked on Negan
before she tipped her head back and quickly took the drink back.

“You still haven’t told me your name,” Negan reminded her, biting into his bottom lip while his
head almost bobbed in an arrogant fashion.

“What? My parents didn’t tell you when you were over for dinner?” she sharply responded and
Negan grinned at her sassy response. “I’m sure you know it.”

“Even if I did, we’ve never really had a formal introduction,” Negan leaned forward in his chair,
his face extraordinarily close to hers making a shuddering breath fall from her lips. “I like to make
a good first impression. Obviously, I’m Negan, but you already know that.”

“Y/N,” she almost whispered and Negan let out an amused sound. He pulled back, holding his
hand out for hers. Expecting him to go for a handshake, she gave him her hand to which he
gradually pulled her hand up to deposit a soft kiss over the back of her hand. It caused her to tremor
in response while his bright hazel eyes were hooked on her eyes.

“What are you doing here tonight Y/N?” Negan nodded toward the area she was in originally.

“Getting a job,” she frowned, almost embarrassed to admit it. “As you know, I’m kind of having
some money problems. In order to figure things out with school, I kind of need money to support
myself.”

“Hmmm…” Negan lowered his head, his free hand reaching up to rub at the back of his neck.
“You know, I was thinking about that. I think I may have an option for you if you are interested. It
would help you with the whole money situation.”

“Oh?” she pulled her hand slowly away from Negan and he nodded. “That’s not creepy.”

“You don’t even know what I was going to say,” Negan chuckled, his nose wrinkling as he stared
out at her. “Don’t you want to hear it first?”

“Not really,” she honestly answered, seeing the shocked expression fall upon his handsome
features. “I don’t need someone else’s help that I don’t even know.”

“Well that’s a shame,” he grumbled tilting his head to the side and Y/N let out an overwhelmed
sound. “As someone who agrees with what you were saying earlier, I thought you might like
having my help, but if you want to work here…I give it to you. That’s dedication.”

“Well it was nice to meet you Negan,” she backstepped away from the bar and Negan gave her an
amused look. “I’m glad I could save you from your poor date.”

“You’re leaving? Just like that, huh?” Negan muttered and she felt her body completely on fire
after her interaction with Negan. “Interesting.”

“Well, I like to make a lasting first impression. Thanks for the drink,” she winked at him and heard
the deep chuckle that fell from his throat when she moved away from him.

Heading back to her paperwork, she attempted to finish it without raising her head to look back up
at Negan. While she found Negan completely interesting, she knew that she shouldn’t be getting
herself into something else that could potentially be bad for her. She was ridiculously attracted to
Negan and she knew it was bad for her.
It took a while for her to finish her paperwork and when she finished, she could see Negan was
getting up to leave. Part of her wanted to go after him because there was that intrigue to know what
he was going to offer her, but she let her better half keep her where she was seated. Whatever the
idea Negan had; it definitely wasn’t going to work for her so it was just better to ignore what had
happened tonight. Negan was interesting to her, but she assumed that being around him would be
bad news.

Finishing everything she had to, she eagerly left afterwards and headed home. When she got home,
she could see that Negan was standing on his porch smoking. Stopping at the bottom of the
driveway, she noticed that he was alone and for some reason she couldn’t stop thinking about what
he had said to her. Negan’s gaze lifted to hers when he pulled his cigarette from his lips and
exhaled a large amount of smoke.

Negan lowered his gaze and went back to smoking showing her that he clearly lost his interest in
her after she turned him down at the bar. Damn, maybe she should have just stuck around to hear
his offer. The possibilities flooded her mind. Most of the time she would have just blown people
off and forgot about them, but Negan was stuck in her mind. Negan was a teacher…what could he
possibly have been able to offer her that was better than the waitressing job at the club?

Trying not to focus on it, she forced herself to look away from him. The urge to go talk to him
again was there, but she knew better.

Heading back inside, she tried to go to her room and forget her interaction with Negan. She had to
start work the next day and she knew it was for the best to get as much rest as she could, but all she
could think about was Negan. There was something that left him lingering in her mind and she
damned herself for it. He was so damn charming, but she had only just met him. She shouldn’t
have been immediately attracted to him like she was.

It was a hard night for her, but she managed to get some rest before heading to work for her first
day. Work was harder than she expected it to be. She hated what she had to wear. Multiple times
her ass had been grabbed and it was so hard for her not to deck someone when they did it. Her
friend tried to tell her that it would be okay because the more relaxed she was, the more tips she
would get. Just further into the night, she found herself getting more irritated and she knew that it
was likely showing in her attitude toward the customers.

“Hey, you have someone requesting you at table nine,” her friend moved over toward her and
handed her over the drink tray that they had made. “Clearly you actually impressed someone
tonight. It’s rare someone requests one of us.”

“Really?” Y/N was confused, but accepted the drinks taking them to the table. When her eyes
connected with the familiar hazel eyed stare, she let out a frustrated sound and put the drinks on the
table. “Negan, what do you want?”

“I just wanted to support you on your first day,” Negan muttered with a bright, arrogant smile and
she lowered her head. She was overwhelmed, she was hot and she felt like a mess. Having him be
there was embarrassing. She didn’t want him to see her like this. “You look like you’re doing
great.”

“Eat me,” she blurt out and Negan snorted with an amused laugh. “I’m falling on my face.”

“It’s your first day, I’m sure it will get better,” Negan reached for one of the drinks she had
brought him and she surveyed the area around him knowing that he had gotten two drinks.

“Are you on another date that you need saving from?” she looked around and Negan shook his
head, his eyes looking her over and she suddenly felt very bare before him. “You just thirsty?”

“Oh no, that’s for you,” Negan nodded at the drink knowing she was referring to the second drink
he had gotten. “Why don’t you take a seat and let me actually talk to you today. I know you’re
stubborn and I like that, but I think you should hear me out.”

“I can’t drink on the job,” she responded with a twisted, confused look. “I have a job.”

“Yes, you do,” Negan took a long sip of his drink, letting out a dramatic sigh when he got
comfortable in his seat. “But I think you should hear me out.”

“I have to work Negan,” she reminded him and Negan shrugged his shoulders. He reached for his
wallet and grabbed some money before handing it over to her. Going to turn on her heel, she took a
look at the money to see that he had tipped her two hundred dollars. Debating whether or not she
should tell him, she turned on her heel and held the money back out to him. “I don’t think you
meant to give me this.”

“Yes, I did…” Negan looked at the money she was trying to return to him. Y/N’s arms lowered at
her sides and he arched his eyebrow in a curious response. “Is that not a good enough tip? I can
give you more…”

“Wait a minute, hold on,” she held her hands up in the air seeing Negan reaching for his wallet to
open it up again. “You’re a schoolteacher, you can’t afford to tip me like this.”

“Ooo, someone is very assuming…aren’t they?” Negan rumbled, his deep voice filling the space
around them and she swallowed down hard. “Sit down.”

Looking back toward the bar, she knew that they were busy, but she did as he told her and pulled
the seat out to sit across from him, “See, I happen to be looking for someone to give me company
and you are looking to get money fast…correct?”

“Yeah?” she gave him an odd expression while he reached out to slide her drink in closer to her.
“What’s your point?”

“I would like you to spend some time with me,” Negan informed her, his fingers tracing over the
table while he spoke. “And for doing that, I’ll give you whatever you want. I’ll buy you whatever
you want. You can have two hundred dollars for every day you spend with me.”

“You want to pay me to spend time with you?” she stammered and Negan nodded, his hazel eyes
hooked on hers. His offer confused her more than it actually answered her questions. “Why?”

“Why not?” Negan immediately answered and she reached for the drink he had bought for her to
take a long gulp of it. The rate at which she drank it amused Negan and he reached for his to take
another sip. “So?”

“You know I’m not a hooker, right?” she pointed out thinking about the idea of what he was saying
to her. Her outburst made him laugh and he almost choked on his drink when she said what she
did. “I’m sure there are people around here that would be willing to sleep with you for money
Negan.”

“Did I say I wanted you to sleep with me? I’m pretty sure I just said I wanted you to spend time
with me,” Negan feigned being offended, placing his large hand over the center of his chest. “Plus,
look at me. Do I really look like the kind of guy that needs to pay someone to have sex with them?”

“Oh, look at you…Mr. Arrogant,” she scoffed and Negan leaned in closer to the table closing the
distance between them. Negan reached out to place his hand over hers and he swiped his fingers
delicately over the back of her hand causing her to shudder. Her eyes slammed shut and she bit into
her bottom lip while having the rough caress of his fingertips over the back of her hand. Forcing
herself to focus, she opened her eyes again to see he was proud of himself with the way she was
reacting to his touch alone.

“And you like it,” Negan simply muttered, his eyes hooked on her lips as she swallowed down
hard. “You can still pretend with your parents that you have this job so they won’t question where
you are getting the money.”

“Where are you getting all this money?” she looked down at the two hundred dollars she had set
on the table beside the drink he had gotten for her.

“I teach because I want to teach sweetheart. I like doing it,” Negan answered, letting out a heavy
exhale as he shifted in his seat.

“What are the rules?” she spoke up after taking a moment to think and Negan seemed impressed
that she asked him that. “I spend time with you obviously, but there has to be something with it.
Are we having sex?”

“Only if you want to. We don’t have to,” Negan replied with a simple sigh, his dimples sucking in
when he smiled brightly.

“So, if I didn’t want to have sex with you?” she retorted finding it hard to believe that he was
willing to have her around and pay her without her putting out for him.

“Then I would be perfectly okay with it,” Negan responded, sliding his hand further up her arm and
she lowered her gaze to look at his large fingers tracing over her flesh. “We don’t have to have sex.
I will never force anything on you.”

“So, if I agree, what am I agreeing to?” she heard someone calling out her name at the bar, but her
attention was fully on Negan as his smile expanded.

“You have to agree to be mine. You can’t date anyone. You can’t have sex with anyone else,”
Negan breathed and she felt her pulse leap inside of her chest while she listened to him. “And
you’ll have to listen to me, within reason.”

“What? Like a slave?” she blurt out and Negan rolled his eyes before shaking his head. “Then
what?”

“Anything I have you doing, you’ll want to be doing,” Negan assured her, his Adam’s apple
bouncing inside of his throat while he stared out at her. “And if you don’t want to be doing it,
something tells me you will like it after you are done.”

“So, I’d be your submissive?” she thought about what he was saying and he shrugged his
shoulders. The idea of that actually turned her on and she couldn’t believe that it actually did.
Picturing Negan being her dominant sexually caused a warmth to spread throughout her entire
body. “Is this where I’m supposed to agree to everything and you take me to your red room?”

“God,” Negan groaned, lowering his head and letting out a loud laugh. “No. Not at all. You’ve
watched too many movies…and bad ones at that.”

“How long does the offer last?” she thought about what he was offering her and she could see the
amused look in his eyes. Maybe if she thought it over and did this a few more days, she would be
able to determine what she really wanted.
“Just tonight,” Negan muttered with a sense of arrogance in his tone. “It lasts while I’m right here
in front of you. After I leave, the offer is gone.”

“Does that mean we are just going to leave and have sex?” she blurt out and Negan shook his head.
“Why not?”

“I told you that we would only do it if you wanted to,” he reminded her and she cleared her throat,
feeling her throat go dry.

“What if I wanted to do it?” she slurred and a proud sound fell from Negan’s throat when she was
clearly admitting that she wanted to potentially sleep with him.

“Nah sweetheart. You may want to do it immediately, but that’s my decision to make,” Negan
denied her of that, his voice getting deeper when he leaned in closer to her. “By the time we have
sex, if we have sex…you’re going to want it so entirely bad that you’ll be begging me for it. You’ll
have to know for certain that I’m what you want. That you’ve never wanted something more in
your entire life.”

“That’s bold to think that I would want sex that badly from you,” she quietly spoke knowing that
they were close enough to hear each other. “You really think you’re that good?”

“I don’t think, I know,” Negan insisted with a firm nod, dragging his tongue over his bottom lip in
a seductive sweep. “I will make you my princess. You will get everything you want and then some.
I will pamper you like you deserve to be pampered.”

“There are people out there that would likely agree to this without being paid Negan,” she gulped
thinking about the offer he was putting out. There was a warmth pooling at her core from his
responses to her. Something like this she would have assumed would usually had turned her off, but
she found Negan very appealing. His words had her body shaking and she didn’t know if she could
jump right into this. “As you said, you aren’t the kind of man hurting for sex.”

“I don’t want other people, I want you,” Negan responded, reaching out to drag his thumb over her
bottom lip. It caused her to let a whimper and a cocky smile expanded over his handsome features.
It was clear he had her eating out of the palm of his hand without even trying that hard. “I like the
fire in you.”

“You might get burned,” she leaned in closer to him when she felt the warmth of his breath over
her face.

“Mmm, I like the sound of that,” Negan winked teasing the pad of his thumb back and forth over
her flesh. It caused her to tremor and he knew that she was definitely considering what he was
saying. “So, what do you say?”

“You’ll never force anything on me?” she confirmed and Negan immediately nodded. “If I’m
uncomfortable…”

“Then we can stop this at any time,” Negan promised, “I’m not going to keep someone around who
doesn’t want to be around. I saw the way you looked at me though. From the first moment you laid
eyes on me, I could see it in the way you breathed that you wanted me. With the way your eyes are
dilated right now I know I have you ridiculously turned on. You’re interested and you’re definitely
attracted to me. So, I know I wouldn’t be forcing anything on you.”

“You’re that confident?” she leaned in closer to him, pressing a soft kiss over the pad of his thumb
and she watched him pull his hand slowly away from her.
“What’s your answer Y/N?” Negan urged her to answer him about his offer.

“When would we start?” she heard someone calling her name again from the bar sounding angrier
than they were before.

“Right now,” Negan slowly stood from the table and reached his hand out to her. “If you want to
do this, come with me.”

“But I’m working,” she reminded him, looking back over her shoulder to see her boss waving her
on angrily from where he was.

“And? You don’t need this job if you agree to what I’m offering you,” Negan wiggled his fingers,
trying to persuade her to come with him. “This is your last chance.”

Taking a moment to think about everything, she lowered her head and felt goosebumps pressing in
over her arms. There was something strangely intriguing about the mystery of Negan, but she
found herself out of breath because of everything that had happened. Never before had she truly
wanted someone as bad as she did Negan.

“Take a leap of faith my dear,” Negan kept his eyes hooked on hers. Reaching for Negan’s hand
she felt him firmly grab her hand in his and he pulled her up from the table to him. A gasp fell from
her lips when she fell in against his chest and reached up to place her free palm over the center of
it. His face was incredibly close to hers and she found herself wanting to kiss him, but he kept his
distance just enough as if to tease her. “Good choice.”

Negan hooked his fingers with hers and led her through the crowded club and outside. This was
usually completely against everything she would normally do, but she was charmed by Negan. His
offer had perked her interest and when she followed him to the parking lot she wondered if she was
crazy for doing this.

Noticing that Negan was leading her to a motorcycle, she let out a tense breath and felt her body
locking up when he reached for one of the helmets he had to offer it to her, “Should I be worried?”

“As long as you hold tightly to me, everything should be fine,” Negan winked, getting on the bike
motioning her to get on behind him. Carefully getting onto the motorcycle, she did as Negan
instructed and wrapped her arms firmly around his torso.

“Is this where you kidnap me and people will never find me?” she joked, but still found herself
almost worried knowing that this was a bit strange. Negan was still a stranger to her and even
though he was charming, she knew next to nothing about him.

“I was actually thinking of getting to know you first darlin’ before kidnapping you,” Negan
snickered, glancing over his shoulder at her as she leaned in closer to him when he started up the
motorcycle.

“God,” she rolled her eyes taking notice that he was screwing with her. “I have valid fears.”

“Sure you do, but you’re just going to have to trust me,” Negan assured her with an amused breath.
“We’ll start things off simple. I promise.”
 Chapter 2
Chapter Summary

The first thing Negan does with Y/N on their first night surprises her with how
innocent it actually is, but a little while into their first night together she realizes that
things are going to be a lot harder than she thought they would be.

“Oh, we’re starting off real hardcore, aren’t we?” Y/N teased as Negan pulled into the parking lot
of a diner and a smile cracked in over the corners of her lips. Negan looked over his shoulder at her
and gave her an odd expression before smirking. “Like I said, I was thinking of red rooms so
coming here is pretty tame in comparison to what my mind was conjuring up.”

“Well, I’m sorry to disappoint you with the lack of chains and whips,” Negan retorted with a snort,
pulling his helmet off, carefully pulling himself from the motorcycle. Reaching his hand out, he
urged her to grab a hold of his hand and winked. “I was just hoping to get to know you first.
Talking to you at the club wasn’t all that comfortable. So, I figured I would buy you a late-night
dinner and get to know you. It’s quiet and I can actually hear you.”

“And that’s what you want to do with me tonight?” she looked down at his hand while she
wrapped her fingers around it. Negan helped her off of the motorcycle and she felt him pull her in
closer to him making her let out a shuddering exhale. “I didn’t think I would be having a late-night
dinner with someone for two hundred bucks.”

“Like I said, I’m not having sex with you any time soon. I just want to get to know you. To me, it’s
well worth the two hundred bucks,” Negan reached up to nudge her chin playfully with his fingers
and nodded toward the diner. “Plus, the people that work here will leave us alone and not get up in
our business like I feel people would anywhere else. They are good folks here.”

“Well at least I know you’re more of a burger and fries kind of guy instead of a four-star restaurant
kind of guy,” she knew that her mind had come up with multiple scenarios of what Negan was like
in her head and it was almost relaxing to know that Negan was more laid back than she pictured
him to be. When he was tossing money out like he was, she assumed he wanted the best of
everything and debated how she would be able to please a man like that with her time.

“I can be both, but who really gets to know someone at a stuffed shirt restaurant?” Negan pointed
out, his hand sliding in over the small of her back to make her follow him toward the doors of the
diner. Once they were inside, Negan made eye contact with one of the waitresses and pointed
toward one of the booths in the back. Following him there, she took a seat with his help and
watched Negan wait for her to get comfortable before going to the other side. “Here we can just
talk and not really worrying about impressing anyone. It’s a relaxed environment and I feel like
when people are in those, they are more open to talking.”

“And what do you want to talk about?” she inquired, her eyebrow perking up while looking him
over. She had so many questions, so many thoughts she wanted to bring up to him, but this was
supposed to be his time she was on. Asking a thousand questions would likely turn him off of her
and that’s the last thing she wanted to do right now.

“Well first of all, why don’t you tell me about school. What were you studying before that asshole
did what he did?” Negan laid his hands over the top of the table and she couldn’t help but take
notice at how long his fingers were.

“Law,” she explained feeling her cheeks flush over when she thought about her education. “I
wanted to be lawyer.”

“Oh, that’s a great profession for you,” Negan chuckled, lowering his head for a moment. It
seemed like he was stuck on a thought that entertained him and she tilted her head to the side. “The
first case you lose, if you think the judge was being a dickhead you would knock his lights out.”

“Oh ha-ha,” she rolled her eyes, reaching up to brush her hair back and out of her face. The waitress
came to ask them what they wanted and when she ordered just water, Negan gave her a frustrated
glance. She didn’t really want to go out and eat while getting to know Negan. What if he was
disgusted by her and decided to change his mind? She could really use this money and there was a
reason he was interested in her. If she ate a certain way, she didn’t know if it would stop him from
wanting to be around her. After all, tonight could be a test. She quit her job for this guy based on
his offer. He saw her eat and was turned off by it, she may have made a huge mistake. “I’m not all
that hungry.”

“Get something to eat,” Negan ordered, his eyes narrowing while he stared out at her expectantly.
“And get something you would actually like.”

Negan had gotten himself a burger and she just went with a club sandwich hoping to get something
that wouldn’t be too messy. When she was done ordering, Negan eyed her over and cocked his
head, “I fully expect you to get what you want when I tell you to.”

“I wanted nothing,” she responded and Negan bit into his bottom lip clearly not believing her. “I
just don’t want you changing your mind about me after I eat. You don’t need to see my chowing
down on a meal and then decide I’m not worthy of your time.”

“Well, since you’re big on rules…never do that kind of thinking. Never worry about what might
turn me off of you,” Negan grunted, looking over toward the front of the restaurant. “I’ve picked
you; I’m sticking with you. So, when I tell you to eat, you eat…”

“Yes sir,” she somewhat laughed and Negan’s eyebrow rose at her sarcasm. It was clear he wasn’t
completely enthralled with her over-the-top mocking tone and she lowered her head down. She
really had to dial back the sarcasm. Lowering her head, she shrugged and wasn’t sure really what to
say. “I’m going to have to work on all of these rules that you are going to come up with. Sometimes
I have a mouth on me and I need to learn to tone it down.”

“We’ll get you to where you need to be,” Negan stretched out, placing his arms on the back of the
booth he was in and she found herself charmed by how confident Negan appeared to be. Watching
him while he surveyed the restaurant made her swoon. This guy was gorgeous and the thought that
he wanted to be near her and spend time with her really blew her away. His chiseled jaw flexed
when he spotted something and looked back to her. Immediately she lowered her head again. Being
caught staring might be uncomfortable at this stage for him and she wanted to appear as normal as
possible to him. It was just hard to understand why someone like him would want to be around
someone like her. “Do you like pie?”

“Like…pie pie?” she repeated making Negan chuckle. It was hard to really know what he was
attempting to ask her because she was thinking dirty thoughts based off previous things he said.
With the uniqueness of the situation she was saying ridiculous things and she knew that. Hopefully
he didn’t think she was simple because she wasn’t. It was just a strange situation and she was
uncomfortable. When she was uncomfortable, sometimes she said some silly things. “I don’t know
if you are asking something…dirty.”

“No, I mean like apple pie. They have a great apple pie here and I thought we could share some
after our meal,” Negan’s face scrunched up after it was clear he was amused with her. Did he find
her charming or just ridiculous? It was hard to read his expressions at this point in the game. “If I
am talking to you about something sexual, you’ll know.”

“Okay,” she wasn’t sure how to respond, this was all still odd to her. She could only picture how
awkward she was coming off to him. “Apple pie is…nice.”

“Good,” Negan stretched his neck out and he bit at his bottom lip. There appeared to be some
tension in his neck and her first thought was rubbing it for him. God, she felt pathetic. She was
desperate to touch him and be close to him only after the second night of knowing he actually
existed. “So, you take school seriously?”

“It’s been my entire life for as long as I can remember,” she answered honestly knowing that there
was no sense in lying. While she could pretend that she wasn’t a total geek to a sense, she knew
that Negan would find out eventually that her education meant everything to her. Being honest
about that she felt was key. “I’ve put my everything into my education. It’s why I’m as upset as I
am about what happened with college. I was damn good at what I was doing.”

“I believe that,” Negan nodded his head, his eyes surveying her closely and it made her wonder
what he was thinking about her. It was hard to read his expressions and she shifted uneasily before
him in her seat. “What are you going to do about school?”

“Well they think they can expel me because they have proof that I broke the windows and set the
car on fire,” she told him what he obviously already knew because of what he had heard with her
and her father. “What they don’t know is that I flirted with someone from the AV club and they
took the tape for me. Eventually, I’m supposed to get the tape from the guy. So, they have no
proof. When the appeal comes up, the thing they think they have on me, won’t be there.”

“God damn,” Negan let out an impressed sound and he leaned forward to get closer to her. “Just
when I think I won’t like you anymore than I already do, you go and say something like that. Shit!
Tell me, should I be jealous of that poor sucker in the AV club?”

“No,” she made a disgusted sound and Negan’s eyebrows bounced up while he listened to her. “I
just flirted with him. You’d be surprised how desperate some people can be just for a little
attention.”

Y/N thought about what she said and wondered if that was appropriate to say considering the
situation they were in right now. It kind of came off extremely arrogant and she didn’t know if he
would be turned off by it, but he looked to be the opposite.

“You’re a fucking badass,” Negan lowered his arms and laid them back on the table again. “I knew
I liked you for a reason.”

“When the world is against you Negan, you learn to do what you have to in order to get by in life,”
she responded knowing that things were harder when you were a woman in the career path she was
interested in. “The world doesn’t make it easy for women.”

“I like that. Hearing that you would do anything to get what you want really puts things into
perspective for me,” Negan drew his tongue over his bottom lip and his hazel eyes were locked on
hers. “You are something else, you know that?”
“Thank you,” she didn’t know what to say as he nearly ate her alive with his eyes. It caused a chill
to fill her body and she had to force herself to look away from him. “How about you? Why are you
a teacher when you could clearly do anything you want with the money you have.”

“I like feeling like I changed someone’s life for the better,” Negan grunted, “Plus I really like
sports. This lets me teach while also getting to coach. I really enjoy it. A lot. People look up to me,
it’s a nice feeling.”

“Ah, so you like people looking up to you,” she lifted her gaze catching the smirk that pressed in
over his features. “I’m sure you have a lot of boys and girls that are drooling every time they are in
your class or whenever you are coaching them.”

“I wouldn’t doubt it,” Negan snickered acting like he didn’t even think that was a thought in his
mind. “I’m sure a lot of them fucking hate me too. That’s what you get when you teach high
school students.”

“I would have loved having you as a teacher,” she confessed catching the interested look that filled
his face when she said that. He sat up straighter and nodded making her lick her lips. “I would have
been interested in actually showing up.”

“Mmm…I think you would have been one of my favorite students,” Negan assured her with
another confident wink.

“Have you ever had a relationship with a student?” she pondered knowing that this was more so
about him getting to know her, but she was interested. “I always wondered these kinds of things.”

“No, but if you were my student, I would have thought about it,” Negan quickly responded making
a shocked sound escape her throat. “I was married for most of my career sweetheart and if someone
found out I was sleeping with a student it would ruin my career. I also tend to like my women of…
age.”

“Well some of them are eighteen,” she remembered what it was like being in high school. If there
was a teacher that would have been there that looked like Negan, she could have seen herself doing
whatever she could to get his attention. She was sure he got that kind of thing now by people who
caught on to how gorgeous he was. “At eighteen I would have loved to have you…”

“Go on,” Negan noticed she stopped when she caught herself clearly thinking something naughty.
This is what he meant when he mentioned quiet places. People got comfortable and just let
whatever was on their mind come out. That’s how he wanted these things. “What would you have
done at eighteen and I was your professor.”

“I would have done anything to get your attention,” she asserted, biting at her bottom lip in an
attempt to play coy.

“Well, in a power position it would feel wrong to accept something like that,” Negan reminded her
with a simple shrug. “Kind of like that asshole professor that fucked your shit up.”

“That’s different though. I’m a damn good student. I was doing everything right and he tried to
fuck me to use his power to get what he wanted,” she insisted with a firm shake of her head. “When
you have a good teacher, like I’m sure you are…I would have been totally drawn to you. I don’t
think you would have forced yourself on me at all. I would have likely forced myself on you.”

“Wow, we’re going there, huh?” Negan mused with a half laugh. “I’m getting the slightest sense
that I may be your type Y/N.”
“Possibly,” she chortled, reaching up to rub her hand in over the side of her warm cheek. There was
no doubt that she was doing some heavy blushing and she couldn’t help it. “I honestly don’t
understand why someone like you…is interested in someone like me.”

“Well that’s for me to know and for you to…potentially find out in the future?” Negan slurred,
trying to find the right words to say. “I like a bit of mystery.”

“No kidding,” she took notice of how things had gone done between them. “You’re a big ball of
mystery for me Mr. Smith. Do you want to tell me why you are doing this in the first place?”

“Doing what?” Negan played ignorant with her, but she knew he knew that she was asking about
why he was having her spend time with him for money. The look she gave him must have told him
that and he laughed. “You don’t even have to speak and I know what you are thinking by that
ridiculously sassy expression of yours.”

“Then you should answer the question,” she scoffed making Negan laugh again. Well at least he
laughed and was amused with her. That was a plus. It would have been bad if she just annoyed him
with her forward attitude. “What am I here for? Is this going to be like a purely sexual relationship
that is no strings attached?”

“Listen, I’m not looking to fall in love with you or hoping to sweep you off your feet if that’s what
you’re asking me,” Negan proclaimed with a small sigh. “I’m not in a position in my life where
I’m ready for that.”

“I see,” she looked down toward his left hand to see that he was still wearing his wedding ring like
her mother had pointed out to her previously. “Can I ask you…anything?”

“Anything,” Negan grumbled noticing that she was looking at his wedding ring that he was
wearing.

“Why still wear the ring if she passed away?” Y/N wondered, knowing that it may have been a
little cold for her to ask that, but it was on her mind. If Negan was looking for attention from her,
why was he still wearing the ring? Negan’s cocky arrogance seemed to fade a bit while he shifted
anxiously before her.

“Just because she died doesn’t mean that she isn’t still my wife Y/N,” Negan looked to his hand
and eyed over the ring that he had kept on his finger. It had been there for so long; he just didn’t
want to take it off. “Sometimes we need things in life that ground us. When things get a little crazy,
we have that thing that pulls us back in. Lucille was that for me. It’s why I keep the ring on. It
reminds me of her and it pulls me back in.”

“Lucille?” she repeated the name clearly realizing that was the name of his late wife. “I’m sorry
she passed away.”

“Me too,” Negan swallowed down hard and bit down on his bottom lip. “She was an amazing
woman.”

There was a silence between them because she didn’t want to say something to upset him any
further than she clearly had already done. Negan played with the ring over his finger with his
thumb before lifting his gaze to her.

“I’m going to assume that you aren’t dating anyone since you took my offer?” Negan
acknowledged and she sighed heavily before nodding. “So, no one special?”

“I told you, education has been my primary focus for a while,” she confessed and Negan rest his
chin on his palm while getting comfortable listening to her after bracing his elbow on the table.
“It’s been quite some time since I’ve had anyone special in my life.”

“So, are you a virgin?” Negan simply blurt out making her cheeks flush over and she lowered her
head to look at the ground beneath the table. “Don’t be embarrassed. Whatever you answer won’t
make me like you any less.”

“No, I’m not,” she responded simply and Negan wiggled his head about as if to say she was being
vague.

“Have you had a lot of sex then?” Negan uttered and she shrugged.

“What’s a lot of sex for someone my age?” she attempted to get a feel for what he thought about
things and he threw his other hand out as if to say he didn’t know. The answer was no, she wasn’t
very experienced, but she didn’t quite want to admit that knowing he may have been looking for
something a little more than what she had to offer. “Have you had a lot of sex?”

“What’s a lot of sex for someone my age?” Negan almost mocked her with an amused smile and
she rolled her eyes at him. “You not being a virgin makes things easier to be honest with you.”

“How’s that?” she was confused as to why he would say something like that.

“When you sleep with someone for the first time, it should be special. You know?” Negan stated
with a tilt of his head.

“Apparently I missed that memo,” she exhaled heavily and Negan gave her an interested
expression. “I was at that point in my life where everyone was going crazy about having sex. I felt
out of place for not having sex and I was trying to figure out why everyone was so big on it.”

“That’s a horrible reason to have sex,” Negan grunted and she felt her face flushing over. Why was
she being so honest with him about this?

“Long story short, I did it to find out what the big deal was and to feel not like a loser,” she
muttered and Negan nodded, the look he was giving her changing when she said that. “I wish I
could get those few minutes back…”

“It wasn’t good?” Negan prodded further and she laughed. “What wasn’t good about it?”

“It was more so uncomfortable and the guy it was with, I was just ready for it to be over,” she
admitted with a hesitant sound. “He thought he was impressive and he definitely thought he was
hot.”

“And he wasn’t, huh?” Negan grumbled, his eyes narrowing out at her as she tilted her head to the
side. It felt weird talking to him about her first experience with sex.

“He thought he was spectacular at sex and God’s gift to women. Let’s just say he wasn’t all that
impressive,” she frowned, looking down toward the table again and she felt embarrassed to be
saying this.

“See, it’s hard for me to picture that you can’t get a decent lover,” Negan informed her with an
expecting glance. “You just told me that you flirted with the AV club guy to get what you wanted.
You’re hot, you know you’re hot. So I feel like you could have gotten whoever you wanted.”

“I’m good with flirting Negan. I know how to use what I have to get what I want. It doesn’t make
me a slut,” she snorted and Negan’s eyebrows perked up when she said it. “I slept with someone
people considered hot and it didn’t take much convincing. Trust me a lot of girls at my school
would have been jealous that I got him, but he wasn’t a big prize like most of the girls thought he
was.”

“You excite me the more you say to me,” Negan hummed thinking about some of the words she
used. “You’re nervous, but you are extremely confident. You’re a badass, but also down to Earth.
Fuck, I like learning the layers of you.”

“You make me sound exciting,” she rolled her eyes and Negan tapped his hands against the table.
“What about you? I’m sure your first time was much better than mine.”

“My first time was a long time ago,” Negan snorted seeing the way her cheeks flushed over again
and he smiled. “What would you say if I told you I was a geek and I didn’t get laid until college?”

“I wouldn’t believe you,” she answered and Negan gave her a sideway glance.

“You’d be right,” Negan shrugged, throwing his hands up. “It was worth a shot.”

“You were definitely a jock and you were very popular,” she took notice of the way he acted.
There was an air to Negan that showed he was admired most of his life. He was cocky and there
was a reason. People always let him be cocky. He was good looking and he knew it. “You likely
slept with most of the school.”

“Maybe,” Negan paused to think of what he should say next. “I was the captain on our basketball
team in high school.”

“And did you or did you not sleep with most of the cheerleaders?” she egged him on and watched
Negan’s features scrunch up with amusement. “I know I’m right.”

“Mhmm,” Negan slowly nodded, biting into his bottom lip. “You want me to be honest with you?”

“It’s a night of honesty,” she retorted with a dramatic shrug. “So why not?”

“In college I stayed with a friend of mine. We lied and said I was her brother so that way I didn’t
have to pay for a place to stay. It was a building with nothing, but girls…” Negan admitted almost
making a pleased look for himself. “Let’s just say, when you are the only male in a building, girls
are pretty damn eager to…get to know you.”

“Of course you did,” she lowered her head into her palm, letting out an amused sound.

“Does that turn you off of me?” Negan poked, his eyes hooked on her when she lifted her gaze
again.

“As you said Negan, you’re completely my type,” she reminded him, hating to confess that to him.
“I would have been one of them hoping to understand why sex was so damn good and why
everyone wanted to sleep with you. Maybe you would make me realize why sex is so damn good.”

“I’m better now than I was then,” Negan almost flirted with her making her shudder. “I know what
a woman wants now. Then, I was just happy to be getting laid at the rate I was. I thought I was
such big shit.”

“Well, I bet the people you slept with felt lucky. Unlike I felt with the guy I slept with,” she
brought back her past and let out a long sigh. “It’s one of the biggest regrets I’ve had in my life and
I’m still wondering why people are crazy about sex.”
“You just didn’t have the right partner,” Negan insisted, reaching out to place his hand over hers to
give it a firm squeeze. “Once you find the right one, you’ll never get enough of it.”

“Yeah?” her eyebrow rose as she leaned in closer to him at the table. “Why is that? What would
you do to make me enjoy it? Now, not back when you were younger.”

“You want me to go there?” Negan grinned with air of arrogance. When she nodded, he took a look
around the diner and made sure they were secluded so no one could hear them. “Give me a
situation. Where are we?”

“Let’s go with where we are now,” she looked around the small diner. “What would you do to
make sure that I enjoyed it?”

“Well, first of all…” Negan lowered his voice, his eyes narrowing out at her. “I would get up from
this side of the table and slide in beside you. I’d start kissing your neck, learning the places you
liked to be touched. Since you’re wearing that sexy little skirt, I would caress over your thigh with
my hand in teasing strokes. I’d gradually slide my hand up between your thighs and trace over your
panties with my fingertips. I’d make sure my eyes were locked on yours to be sure I could see
which ways I touched you made you shudder or shake. After I knew that you were turned on and
full of lust, I’d push your panties aside and push this finger inside of you.”

She watched him raise his hand up and wiggle one of his fingers. Listening to him was drawing her
cheeks to turn a light shade of red again and he could sense that her breathing had gotten heavier
while he was talking, “I’d finger you, urging you to make sure that you stayed quiet while we were
in here because we wouldn’t want to be caught. After you were nice and wet, I would put a second
finger in. I’d vary with slow thrusts of my fingers to quick. It would be based on if you were about
to have an orgasm or not. If you were close, I would slow down, making sure to drag it out. When
we could get away, I’d go to the bathroom and instruct you to follow me in there. When we were
alone, I’d make sure the door was locked and I’d hoist you up on the sink. I’d take your panties off
and put them in my pocket. Get down on my knees and eat our your pretty little pussy. It would be
about dragging out the pleasure for you. I would use my fingers and tongue in equal amounts
teasing your clit while also focusing on hitting your g-spot. I’d do it until I had you screaming out
my name having your first orgasm.”

“Yeah?” she was eager for him to continue as Negan checked to make sure they were still alone
within reason. The undoubtable pounding of her heart inside of her chest was felt and she felt
goosebumps pressing in over her arms. Truthfully, this was making a warmth pool at her core and
it ached. Negan was turning her on incredibly bad by just his words and it was hard to admit it, but
it was true.

“Just when you thought you were at the peak of your pleasure, I would let you take my cock out
because something tells me that you would eagerly like to get me out of my pants yourself,” Negan
looked down toward his groin, a wicked smirk pressing in over his handsome features when his
eyes lifted back to hers. “I’d have you put me inside of you and I would make sure to kiss you
while you got used to my size.”

“I take it that means you are big,” she felt her throat go dry and Negan sat up straighter.

“I’m six foot one,” Negan cleared his throat and she felt her frustrations getting the best of her
when he clearly teased her again.

“You know I mean your dick,” she simply stated, licking at her lips. “I’m trying to put an image in
my mind and make this as realistic as possible. Do you have a big cock?”
The sound of a surprised breath fell over them making Negan choke in amusement when the
waitress had brought their drinks to the table. An incredible amount of embarrassment filled her
entire body as she groaned inwardly and lowered her head into her palm after seeing the look on
the waitress’s face.

“Thank you,” Negan was chuckling when the waitress swiftly walked away from the table. “Very
subtle. We’re clearly going to have to teach you to do things on the downlow so we don’t involve
other people and make it uncomfortable.”

“Why didn’t you tell me she was coming?” she lifted her head from her hand and could see that
Negan was completely amused with her.

“I didn’t know where you were going with it,” Negan snickered, lowering his head to laugh to
himself. “It’s why I answered my height.”

“After all of this, I think you at least owe me an answer,” she claimed nodding toward him when he
lifted his head to look up at her. “I did just embarrass the hell out of myself there.”

“It’s pretty good,” Negan rubbed at the back of his neck, letting out a strained noise.

“What does that mean?” she was flustered with his answer and it was clear he liked screwing with
her.

“It means it’s bigger than the average size,” Negan bit at his bottom lip, his tongue flicking out
over his bottom lip. “I’m not a horse or anything of the sort…”

“So bigger than six inches?” she confirmed making Negan grin over her interest.

For someone who hated sex as much as she said she did, it entertained him that she was so sexual
with him about her questions. It really was flattering that she was so hot and bothered by him.

“Why? Do you want a monster cock after your first experience?” Negan teased her and she let out
an agitated sound. “Yes, it’s bigger than six inches and it’s thick. Would you like me to continue or
would you like excruciating details of my penis so that way if you ever do see it you aren’t
surprised at all?”

“Keep going,” she almost begged looking around to make sure the waitress wasn’t anywhere near
their table. “Please.”

“Okay,” Negan watched her scooting in closer to the table and he found it cute that she was so
eager to hear how they would finish in his little story. “Once you were used to my…size…”

The way in which he said that made a smile crack in over his lips. Well one thing was for certain,
he certainly was someone that liked fucking with her and liked getting her hot with what he was
saying.

“I would start off at a slow pace making sure that your eyes were hooked on mine. Once you were
relaxed, I would make each thrust just a little bit harder. I’d want you to hold onto my shoulders
tightly so that when I started fucking you harder you would have something to brace yourself with.
When it seemed like you were about cum, I would stop. I’d get you on your feet and make you
face the mirror. You’d brace your hands on the mirror while I thrust into you from behind. I’d
make you watch me fuck you while my fingers rubbed your clit at the same tempo I was thrusting
my cock inside of you. This time you would be allowed to cum. Near the end I would make it so
you could crawl in over me and ride my cock to your own accord. Letting you control when I get to
cum. You’d bring yourself to another orgasm before making me cum inside of your tight little
pussy. We’d kiss until I went soft inside of you…”

“Wow,” she breathed out slowly, feeling certain parts of her tingling when Negan explained just
what he would do to her. An involuntary shiver filled her entire body and she waved her hand in
the air. “You are…”

“Oh look, our meal,” Negan rubbed his hands together when the waitress came back with their
food. Instead of being able to say what she wanted, she swallowed down hard and avoided making
eye contact with the waitress. “Thank you darlin’.”

The area around Y/N felt like it was spinning and she was doing her best to bring herself back
down from the high his story gave her. Negan had started to eat, but when he noticed she wasn’t
eating he gave a wicked smirk.

“Eat your food sweetheart,” Negan winked and during their meal he asked her questions about
herself that were rather innocent. They talked about things to get to know each other better on a
more personal level that didn’t really involve anything sexual. How he went from being that…
sexual to just talking like it never happened blew her mind. She was still heated and she could tell
that Negan got her mighty excited. When they were done, Negan ordered a single piece of pie and
when it came to the table, he grabbed a forkful to hold his hand out for her to take a bite. “Open
wide.”

“Yes sir,” she smirked parting her lips for him to feed her the bite of pie. When she made a pleased
sound, he was proud and grabbed a bite for himself. “This was nice.”

“Yeah, it was,” Negan agreed with a loud sigh, thinking things over as he took a couple more bites
from the pie. Slowly, Negan pulled himself up from the side of the table that he was on. Taking a
seat on the same booth as her, he urged her further in wrapping his left arm around her shoulders.
The way she gasped made him smile while his hazel eyes hooked on hers. “This has been quite an
eye opener for me. You know? I’m glad you agreed to this. I don’t think you’ll be disappointed
with agreeing to this whole thing.”

“Yeah?” she felt heated when he leaned in closer to her. His right hand grabbed a hold of her jaw
and she felt his lips pressing in over her jawline making her take in a sharp breath. The sensation of
his lips trailing over the side of her neck caused her eyes to slam shut. She was tremoring and she
knew he was doing what he told her would be the first thing he would do if they had sex at the
diner.

“You are something else,” he muttered against her flesh, biting softly at her skin. A small moan
fell from her throat and Negan’s gaze lifted to look at the diner to make sure she hadn’t drawn
attention to them. When he was certain they were fine, he went back to depositing wet kisses over
her skin taking the time to see what areas seemed to drive her the craziest with desire. “I think the
two of us are going to have a lot of fun together.”

“I think so too,” she agreed, biting into her bottom lip when his rough palm settled in over her bare
thigh. The roughness of his skin tickled hers and it drew her to spread her legs further apart for
him. Negan was pleased with himself and he continued to slide his hand further up her thigh.
“Negan…”

“Yeah?” Negan hummed against her neck, his tongue flicking out over her skin before nipping
again.

Sliding forward in her seat when she felt Negan’s fingers exceedingly close to her panties, she
found herself ridiculously excited at the idea that he was doing what he had told her at the
beginning of his story. It wasn’t like her to want to have sex with someone like this, but there was
something about Negan that just drew her to him. God, he was so sexy.

“We should probably pay for the bill,” Negan pulled his hand back and his mouth away from her
neck. A desperate sound fell from her throat when he had clearly tormented her with the idea of
what he had said in his story. “I should get you home. It’s been a busy night for you.”

“What…what about the bathroom?” she suggested and Negan lifted his gaze to look in the
direction where the bathrooms were. “Don’t you want to go in there?”

“Nah, I’m good,” Negan reached up to swipe thumb in over her jawline. It was clear that he was
teasing her. He got her excited at the idea of what he had told her before they had eaten, but he
wasn’t going to give that to her. “I don’t need to go.”

“But…” she tried to reason with Negan watching him get up to pay the bill. She was shaking. Her
breathing was heavy and she was truly heated. More than anything she wanted Negan to take her
into the bathroom and do just what he had said he would. Yet, he was fucking with her. Her lips
parted and she swallowed down hard. “Fuck.”

“You ready to go sweetheart?” Negan reached for her hand and helped her up from the seat she
was in. When he noticed her legs shaking, he stepped forward and made sure his lips were pressed
to her ear. “Just how wet is your pussy right now?”

“You could find out,” she whispered and Negan laughed against her flesh making a chill run down
her spine again.

“I think I’ll wait for a better opportunity,” Negan hushed her, pressing a soft kiss against her
earlobe before tugging softly on her hand to get her to come with him to his motorcycle. The urge
to beg Negan to desperately fuck her was there, but she didn’t want to come off completely
pathetic. Shuddering, she got back on the motorcycle with him and heard him let out a satisfied
breath. “Make sure you hold really tight to me baby. I’m going to take you home.”

“What about my car?” she thought back to the fact she had driven herself to work before Negan
convinced her to come with him. “It’s still at the club.”

“Tell your parents that you were feeling sick and a friend drove you home,” Negan answered like it
was no big deal at all. “They will take you to pick it up in the morning.”

And like that, she didn’t fight him. Holding tightly to him, she rest her cheek against his back as he
drove them home. It was a nice feeling that she wasn’t quite ready to end when Negan finally did
get home. When he pulled into his driveway, she was disappointed and wanted the night to last
longer.

Steadying herself on her Jell-O feeling legs, she rubbed at her arms and could see Negan staring
out at her with an expecting glance.

“Do you…want me to come in?” she pointed toward his house and Negan’s eyebrow arched up. A
wolfish smile pulled at his lips and he shook his head slowly. “We could get to know each other a
little bit better.”

“Not tonight,” Negan denied her, shoving his hands in his pockets while he turned his attention
back to her. Why was he being so damn difficult? “I think we’ve gotten to know each other pretty
well for tonight. We can end it here.”

“I still feel like there is so much more to learn,” she reasoned with him and Negan nodded.
“Which is why I look forward to our future encounters,” Negan stepped forward, getting
exceedingly close to her. The warmth of his breath over her face caused her to shudder and she
found herself leaning in closer to him. With his eyes on hers the way they were, she felt connected
to Negan in a way that made her eager to get to know him more. “I’ll see you morning.”

“Wait…aren’t you going to kiss me?” she called out to him when he pulled away from her to leave.
“That’s the perfect way to end the night, right?”

“Would it be perfect for me…or perfect for you?” Negan stepped forward nuzzling his nose
against the side of her neck when he lowered his head. Negan dragged his bottom lip over her flesh
making her whimper out. Dragging the back of his fingers over her lower abdomen, Negan bit back
a groan himself. “Can I touch you.”

“Yes,” she shuddered when Negan slid his palm between her thighs to palm in over her mound. It
made her cry out into his collarbone, burying her face against his leather jacket. Negan hummed
with approval when he managed to slip his hand beneath the material of her panties. All he did was
slide his palm over her body before a proud sound fell from his throat.

“You are so fucking wet,” Negan growled, pulling his hand from her panties and bringing his
fingers up to his lips. There was a wicked smirk over his handsome face when he sucked softly at
his fingertips. “I have a direct order for you tonight. I know when I leave you tonight, you are
going to want to touch yourself when you’re in bed tonight. You’ll want that release because I’ve
got you fucking soaked and aching…”

Involuntarily she was shaking and Negan grunted when he reached to pull her close to him, “but
you aren’t allowed to touch yourself. You can’t shower, you can’t masturbate…you are to go to
bed immediately. You need to get your sleep because I expect you here bright and early tomorrow
after you get your car. I have plans for you. So, in the morning you can shower and get yourself
ready, but not tonight.”

“That doesn’t seem fair,” she bickered in a soft voice and Negan let out a disappointed tsking
sound.

“You’re not allowed to, no matter what,” Negan maintained, pressing a long kiss over the side of
her face. “If I find out you did, you’ll be punished for it and trust me…you’re the type that can’t
hide lying very well so I will know.”

“Yes sir,” she obeyed and Negan back stepped away from her, his amused breath filling the air.

“Good girl,” Negan clicked his tongue at the top of his mouth and leaned back in a dramatic
manner. “I’m so proud of you.”

There was a silence while Negan clearly thought hard about something and he held his hand out to
her, “Give me your phone.”

Listening, she handed him over her phone and saw him typing something in. When he handed it
back to her, she could see that he put his phone number into her phone and sent himself a text so he
would have her number as well. When Negan started to move away from her, she was thinking a
desperate way to try and keep him there with her.

“So, no kiss?” she reaffirmed and Negan nodded once. Damn, that was disappointing. She
imagined kissing him was amazing and the fact he wasn’t doing it made her even more
uncomfortable than before. “Well, goodnight I guess.”
“Sleep tight,” Negan wiggled his fingers and headed back toward his home. Moving back to her
parent’s house, she found herself staring as Negan moved into his home. He didn’t even look back
over his shoulder at her and it disenchanted her.

Truthfully, the perfect night would have been doing exactly what he told her in his story, but
instead she ended up with this. Heading inside she went upstairs and crawled into her bed after
getting dressed for bed. There was a strong ache at her core and she looked to the time. Negan
wouldn’t know if she touched herself, right?

Biting firmly into her bottom lip, she closed her eyes and pictured everything he told her at the
diner tonight. It was easy to picture in her mind and even though she wanted to caress over her
aching body, she knew that she was given an order not to. Whining, she looked toward the window
and wondered if Negan was thinking of her the way she was thinking of him.

Damn, it was going to be hard to sleep tonight thinking about Negan. Especially when she was
desperate for tomorrow morning. She was excited to see what Negan had in store for her in the
morning. If it was anywhere near this, she figured it was something she would definitely be happy
with.
 Chapter 3
Chapter Summary

Y/N has her first day with Negan and easily lets her emotions get in the way when she
thinks Negan doesn't like her the way she wants him to.

Sitting at the kitchen table, Y/N was waiting for Negan to write her to let her know that he was
ready for her. Early in the morning she had woken up her mother to take her to go get her car that
was still in the club parking lot. While her father would have likely spared her the lecture of
working at a club, she didn’t want to see his face after everything he said to her the other day. His
view on what happened with her at school was really misogynistic. It disappointed her that he
would view things the way he did with what happened to her at school.

So instead, she put up with her mother who took her to the club to go get her car while lecturing
Y/N about selling her body to make money. Instead of telling her mother that she didn’t work there
anymore, she listened to what Negan suggested and didn’t tell her mom she quit. If she told them
that she quit the job, they would question where the money and the items she was getting were
coming from. That was a subject she really didn’t want to touch. Hell, she wasn’t even sure why
she was doing this in the first place with Negan, but she was. Her parents would never begin to
understand if she didn’t even understand it.

After a while of listening to her mother’s lecture, she brought up the fact that her father was so
insistent on her making money and getting a job. When her mother stated she was hoping it would
be something a little less skimpy, Y/N found herself offended. They wanted her to get a low paying
job that didn’t embarrass them and make their family look bad. It disgusted her that her parents
were like that. Hell, they would have been so angry if they knew what she was doing now with
Negan. It definitely would have brought that ‘shame’ and embarrassment to their family like her
mother was speaking about.

Swallowing down hard, she lowered her head and felt her face flushing over when she thought
about Negan. Last night she could barely sleep. Negan had told her to go straight home and sleep.
She listened, she didn’t touch herself just like he had ordered and she didn’t take a shower until the
morning. But during the night, she ached like hell. Negan had made her so hot while they were
together that she felt numb.

When she closed her eyes, she thought about the scenario that Negan came up with while they
were together at the restaurant and it just turned her on so much. Without being able to touch
herself or take a shower, she tried to focus on other things. She turned on a scary movie to try and
get him out of her mind, but it didn’t work. She tried digging her nails into her palm to focus on the
pain of that other than the eagerness to have some kind of release after Negan had done what he
did. What ended up working was turning on music early into the morning, but it was likely due to
complete exhaustion and she felt like shit when she woke up in the morning.

It made her think about Negan. Was he thinking about her last night? Did he think about her like
she was thinking about him?

“Shit,” Y/N cussed to herself and looked to her phone again when she knew that Negan said he
would be contacting her. She was so desperate to be around him and the fact he turned her on as
much as he did really drove her crazy.

Usually she was so levelheaded about things, but with Negan she wasn’t that person and it troubled
her. In her opinion, she was a very confident woman that didn’t need a man, but with Negan around
she couldn’t help herself. There was something about him that drew her to him. He was sexy,
ridiculously charming and she couldn’t get enough of him. It was crazy the way her mind had been
locked on him since the first moment she saw him.

There had to be a way to tone down the feelings she had for him because this wasn’t like her, at all.
This was a new feeling for her and she was doing her best to try to get used to it. Last night she was
incredibly eager to have sex with Negan. The scenario he explained to her at the diner sounded
amazing. In the past something like that wouldn’t have really piqued her interest, but he did. With
someone that sexy having an interest in her, she couldn’t help it. What was so special about her that
made him want her like he did? And if he did want her, he had every opportunity to have her last
night. Hell, she basically threw herself at him. Multiple times during the night, but he wasn’t eager
to have that kind of interaction with her. Which made her think about what he really wanted with
her. Why have someone around and tease them like that to not sleep with them?

Groaning inwardly, she reached for the bottle of water she had and brought it up to hold it over her
pulse point. She needed to cool down or when she was with Negan today, she wouldn’t be able to
control herself again.

The sound of her phone vibrating was heard and she eagerly reached for it. God, this was pathetic
to be this excited over the idea of spending time with a man she barely knew. Seeing that it was
Negan telling her to meet him outside in the car, she felt her heart begin to hammer inside of her
chest. She needed to play it off cool. She couldn’t be as desperate as she was being last night. It
was pathetic in her mind and wanting Negan as much as she did wasn’t normal.

Walking out of the house, she walked across the street to see Negan waiting in his mustang.
Tapping on the window, she saw Negan look away from his phone and flash her a smile, pushing
his sunglasses down the bridge of his nose. Negan’s eyes surveyed her over when he waved her
forward to get into the car with him.

“There you are,” Negan slurred, lifting his hips enough to push his phone back into his pocket.
When she got comfortable in the car beside him, Negan smiled brightly and gave her a wink. “How
are you today?”

“I’ve honestly been better,” she confessed catching the amused expression that he made. It was
cocky while slightly entertained. “I didn’t get much sleep last night.”

“I thought I told you to go straight home and sleep,” Negan reminded her with a tsking sound,
pushing his sunglasses back up his face. “I’m disappointed to hear that you didn’t listen to me.”

“Oh, I listened to you. I went straight to my bedroom after I went home and I laid there. Forever.
Thinking about the things you said and did last night,” she claimed, her eyes narrowing when
Negan smirked. With the way his dimples showed, she could feel her heart hammering inside of
her chest. Maybe it was those damn dimples that drew her to him. Every time she saw them, she
felt her heart flutter. They were so damn sexy. “Something tells me that you knew I wouldn’t be
sleeping last night though.”

“I have no idea what you are talking about,” Negan feigned innocence reaching up to place his
hand over his chest. It was clear that he was screwing with her and she wasn’t going to fall into it
like he wanted. When she stayed silent and felt her body flushing over with a warmth, it made him
laugh. Negan cleared his throat and she lifted her eyes to see that he was caressing over his short
salt and pepper colored beard. “So, tell me…did you obey what I told you to do last night?”

“Are you asking me if I masturbated or not?” she inquired and watched his eyebrow arch up over
his sunglasses. “I listened to you. I hated every moment of it, but I listened. I did everything to take
my mind off of you, but…”

“I’m pretty unforgettable,” Negan grumbled, a wicked smile pressing in over his handsome
features. “I’m so proud of you for listening to my demands. It shows me that you are serious about
this whole thing. That you are okay with being mine and listening to my commands.”

“So, we are going for that whole submissive and dominant relationship, huh?” she licked her lips
and Negan got more comfortable in the car beside her. “I never thought that’s what I would be
doing with you the first moment I saw you.”

“Do you want to stop?” Negan offered and he caught the glare she gave him making him laugh.
“I’m going to take that as a no.”

“You think? “she chortled and Negan reached out to place his hand over her knee. It made a sharp
breath escape her throat and she shifted uneasily in the car. Oh, she was doing a great job acting
normal and cool about all of this. Not. All he had to do was touch her to turn her into a melting
mess.

“I’m just saying, if you don’t want to do this anymore…we can stop right now. I don’t want to get
too deep into this for you to find out that this isn’t what you like or want,” Negan pointed out with a
long sigh. “Why make us both go through that if you are only going to pull out on me?”

“I’m in this Negan,” she assured him and Negan grinned, caressing his hand over her knee for a
moment before pulling it back. “Unfortunately, I think you already have me hooked on you. Which
scares me. I’m sure you weren’t thinking about me last night like I was thinking about you.”

The smile he gave when she said that almost made her feel awkward for even blurting that out.
Admitting to him that she was pretty much obsessed with him was probably a bad thing. It sounded
so pathetic. She was so damn used to getting everything that she wanted. So, this whole thing with
Negan blew her mind. Her confidence got her nowhere with Negan because they were going by his
rules and he made that very clear. With her awkward outbursts and strange admissions of pure
honesty just made her feel pitiful. He probably thought she was a geek with the way she spoke
about him.

“Oh, no…it was quite the opposite really,” Negan spoke slowly, biting at his bottom lip
deliberately when she turned to look at him. “When I got into bed, all I could think about was your
pure look of ecstasy and desire while you were standing in my driveway. I kept picturing how
desperately you wanted me to take you into my house and fuck you…”

His words caused her to draw a nervous breath when Negan brought his hand in over the center of
his pants. Watching him palm over himself through his jeans made her face get hot at the sight. It
drew her throat to go dry and Negan let out a teasing moan.

“I jerked off as soon as I got in bed last night,” Negan muttered and she lifted her gaze to him,
wishing like hell he wasn’t wearing his sunglasses right now so she could see his eyes. “I pictured
that I took you up on your offer. I brought you into my house and when we got in you got on your
knees. You were desperate to prove your worth so you opened my pants and eagerly pulled my
cock out.”

“Shit…” she let out a lengthy exhale while Negan dragged his tongue over his bottom lip and she
watched Negan arch his hips up toward his caress. “Your stories Negan…they uh…they do
something to me.”

“I couldn’t get my mind off the idea of you giving me a blowjob,” Negan admitted with a growl
and he rest his head back against the headrest of the seat he was in beside her. “That beautiful face.
Those gorgeous eyes hooked on mine while you would give me a blowjob…”

“It must have been nice to get that release,” she didn’t know if he was fucking with her, but he was
getting her hot again and he knew that. She wasn’t allowed to touch herself so hearing this almost
made her jealous.

“Oh, I came so fucking hard,” Negan acknowledged, a wolfish grin pressing over his wet lips. “All
over my chest and abdomen…”

An uncomfortable sound fell from her throat while she shifted in the seat beside him. The very idea
of her picturing him like that made her tremendously hot and bothered. Without a doubt, he knew
that’s what saying this would do to her.

The way Negan licked his lips while he touched himself made her desperate to want to grab him
and kiss him. Right there. Yet, she knew she couldn’t. This was supposed to be his rules. He had
already said that once. If she went beyond what he told her, she could only imagine how he would
react. So instead, she had to keep her wants and desires held back.

“Then this morning in the shower…” Negan went to continue, but she knew if he kept this up there
would be no way she would be able to make it through things.

“I don’t know what your plans are today, but if you keep doing that…I’m going to have a real
problem,” she proclaimed, knowing that watching Negan and listening to him like that would
undoubtedly get her to the same place she was last night. A chuckle fell from Negan’s throat as he
gave his body another firm squeeze before starting up the car. “I get the slightest hint you are
fucking with me.”

“Not in the way you think,” Negan answered, looking over at her. It was obvious by the way her
eyes were dilated that she was incredibly turned on by what he had just done. “I really did jerk off
twice while thinking about you since we left each other. That’s not a lie.”

“Really?” she huffed feeling her body involuntarily shaking and Negan cocked his head in an
arrogant fashion. Looking down at his lap she felt her mouth go dry at the slight bulge that was at
the center of his pants. It made her think about what he had said the night before when they talked
about how big he was.

Damning herself for looking, Negan clearly took notice and reached down to squeeze over the
bulge that was there, drawing attention to his body. The more she looked, the more she pictured
what it was like and how much she wanted to actually see it.

“Absolutely,” Negan assured her with a long exhale, releasing himself when he could hear her
breathing loudly. “I just really like to see you get hot and bothered. You’re fucking adorable.”

“Adorable? I’m not sure that’s the word I want to picture you thinking of me,” she anxiously
responded hoping that he would rather find her sexy instead of adorable. “You’re probably not even
turned on.”

“Do you want to feel to see?” Negan looked down toward his lap and he could see that she turned
slightly pale at the offer. “All you get is a touch though.”
“If I do, I’m going to want more,” her eyes centered in over Negan’s pants and he was entertained
with what she had said. “So, I’m going to politely turn down your offer so I can do with you what
you wanted to do in the first place.”

“Sounds fair,” Negan tilted his head to the side and let out a loud sigh. “Don’t underestimate
yourself beautiful. I don’t lie. I have no reason to. What I said happened really did. Fuck, I’m
somewhat hard right now and you can see that. So, when I tell you something, believe me.”

“Okay,” she simply muttered and lowered her gaze again to see Negan smirk when she took a look
at the center of his pants. Opening his legs for her, he adjusted in the seat and reached to turn the
radio on. “So where are we going?”

“I heard there is an outdoor mall around here that’s really nice,” Negan announced knowing that he
had only just moved there, but it was something a lot of people had already spoken to him about. “I
was thinking I would take you there and let you go wherever you want.”

“What do you mean?” her eyes narrowed out at him and he chuckled.

“I mean whatever you want, you can have,” Negan assured her with a smirk, his eyebrows arching
enough to extend over his dark sunglasses. “When I told you I was going to pamper you, I wasn’t
lying. Anything you want, you can have.”

“Yeah, but the clothing stores there are expensive,” she reminded him and Negan wiggled his head
around dramatically like he was waiting for her point. “You really don’t care?”

“I mean if I like something and I suggest you might look good in it; all I ask of you is to potentially
try it on and let me buy it for you. Otherwise, you can get whatever the fuck you want,” Negan
dragged his tongue over his bottom lip before smiling again. “Sound good?”

“Why would I complain about something like that?” she wondered if she was taking advantage of
the situation too much.

On the ride over to Negan’s destination, she realized she hadn’t really thought much about this this
part of their agreement. When he told her that he would give her two hundred dollars for every day
that he spent with her and buy her things, she took him up on the offer because she needed the
money, but truthfully…she really just wanted to be near him. The idea of the money was just a
plus, but she was charmed by Negan. Was she doing the wrong thing in using him here? Part of her
wanted to be spoiled. After all she had been through, why shouldn’t she deserve something like
this? Still, she wanted to sleep with Negan, she wanted to be around Negan. Was accepting the
money wrong?

When they went into one of the more expensive stores at the mall, they just walked around for a bit
and Y/N swallowed down hard, “Can I ask you a few things?”

“I told you, you could ask me anything,” Negan pointed out, pulling his sunglasses from his face
before sliding them into his jacket pocket.

“Are we going to hold hands and stuff when we’re out in public or are we going to do this whole
distance between us thing?” she wiggled her fingers to show that they looked like two complete
strangers that just happened to be walking by each other. In a way, they were strangers she
supposed, but part of her wanted that close contact if she was going to be his. “You made it clear
that I’m supposed to be yours.”

“I want you comfortable first and foremost. I thought you may want to get to know me a bit first
before we step into certain territories,” Negan’s eyes narrowed and he seemed tickled with her
question. “Do you want to hold my hand?”

“I don’t know,” she lied knowing that yeah, she wanted that contact with him. It was strange, but
she wanted to be close to Negan. She barely knew him, but she was desperate to have him near.
The curios expression Negan gave her made her realize he could call her bullshit with her lie and
she sighed. “Kind of, yeah. If I’m going to be yours…I want to feel like I’m yours.”

An amused sound escaped Negan’s throat and he stopped walking with her for a moment to turn to
face her. Slowly his hand raised and he offered it to her making her let out a worried breath, “I told
you…anything you want is yours.”

“Yeah?” she surveyed his hand and reached out to place her hand in his. The fact he agreed to this
made her happier than she cared to admit. Negan gave her a wink and appreciated the warmth of
him against her. Hooking her fingers with his made a chill run down her spine. Lowering their
hands, she felt strangely good being able to walk in the store with him hand in hand. If she was
going to be his, she wanted to feel like she was his and doing this in public was a way to make her
feel like that.

“You haven’t looked at anything darlin’,” Negan reminded her with a grunt, looking expectantly
over at her while they walked through the store. “Surely there is something you want here.”

“Yeah, but…” she bit at her bottom lip and shrugged her shoulders, “It’s expensive here. You
probably want to take me to a different store.”

“Expense means nothing to me if it’s something that you want,” Negan scoffed, lifting her hand up
to his mouth to press a kiss over the back of it. It made a sharp breath get stuck in the base of her
throat when the contact of his lips pressed in over her skin. He had told her that he would give her
whatever she wanted, but obviously within reason because all she could think of wanting was him
kissing her. The idea of him taking her into one of dressing rooms and fucking her senseless was
something she wished she could request from him but knew he would deny her those things. “So
please…look. That was our agreement. Anything you want, it’s yours.”

“Okay,” she led him back toward an area where some clothing caught her attention. Negan’s hand
was still clasped tightly with hers while she looked through a few items. When she found
something she liked she picked it up and he held it for her so she could keep looking.

“How do you feel about dresses?” Negan’s eyes were surveying over a dress that was beyond them
and she could sense that he wanted it for her. “I have a thing for black dresses. They just really…”

“If you want me to wear it, I will,” she licked at her lips wondering if she wore that dress if it
would be the thing to get Negan to want to be with her in a sexual way.

“Why don’t you go try on anything that you want and I’ll grab the dress,” Negan’s fingers released
from hers and she could feel her heart hammering inside of her chest looking at him. “I’ll be right
back.”

Listening to what he suggested, she went into one of the dressing rooms to try things on. Part of her
hoped that Negan would show up in the dressing room and request to come in with her. See the
things that she was trying on, but he wasn’t coming and she had been in there for a while. The
items she picked up she loved and knew if it was any other situation, she would put them back, but
Negan was insistent upon her getting what she wanted.

Moving out of the dressing room, she saw Negan waiting for her at the entrance of it and he was
holding onto the dress that he had wanted her to try on, “Do you want to put this on for me? Let me
see the way it looks on you?”

“Okay,” she handed him over the other clothes that she ended up liking and wanting to keep.
Stepping back, she thought about the things that had been lingering in her mind and let out a
hesitant sound. “Do you want to come in the dressing room with me?”

“Do you want me to?” Negan cracked a wicked smile when her eyes flashed over with mischief.
Y/N wiggled her finger at him to get him to follow her into the dressing room and he looked back
over his shoulder to make sure that people weren’t paying attention to him going in with her. When
Y/N opened the door to have him follow her in, Negan stood there frozen for a minute. The way he
was looking her over made him lick his lips and he nodded once more before moving into the
dressing room. Negan set the things she wanted to keep in the corner of the room and stood there.
Y/N was feeling bold. Hell, this was more than she had ever done to try and get someone she
wanted, but this had to be good enough to get Negan interested. “Do you want me to look away?”

“Do you want to look away?’ she questioned in a rebuttal and Negan lowered his head. The way
his dimples got deeper with his amused reaction made her swoon. God, he was beautiful. Hanging
the black dress that Negan had grabbed for her, she licked her lips and felt an overabundance of
courage filling her body.

“No,” Negan was honest when his eyebrows bounced up and his head raised.

“Good,” she leisurely exhaled attempting to keep up with her forward actions when she reached for
the bottom of the shirt she was wearing. The rate at which she pulled it from her body was slow
enough to draw attention to her. Facing Negan, she knew what she was doing and she was
desperately trying to get Negan to want her. When she got the material from her body, she could
see that Negan was observing her closely. His breathing hadn’t appeared to change much, but his
eyes were surveying her body when she revealed part of her flesh to him. “Have you ever had sex
in a dressing room before?”

“Yes,” Negan responded with an arch of his eyebrow, his head tilting when she reached for her
pants to work them down her body. Turning away from Negan, she pushed her bottom out to draw
his attention to it and she could see in the mirror that it had. The way Negan bit into his bottom lip
showed her that her motions were working to a degree.

“Tell me about it?” she stammered and Negan smirked. When her eyes connected with his in the
mirror, he shook his head and she frowned. “Why not?”

“Because when I’m with you I don’t want to think about anything else from my past,” Negan
quickly answered making a nervous sound escape her. That was not at all what she was expecting
from him and Negan shrugged his shoulders. “I’m not with them, I’m with you.”

“Then I guess we’ll have to recreate some stories for you to tell then,” she pushed aside the
immediate want to throw herself at him for that comment. Anyone with half a brain could tell she
was asking Negan to sleep with her there. Negan knew it and by the expression over his face, he
wasn’t going to give it to her, but God…she was going to try. Hooking her arms around to reach for
the clip in her bra, she could see Negan’s Adam’s apple bouncing in his throat and it was the first
time he seemed to be somewhat uncomfortable. This was so unlike her in the end, but she knew
what she wanted and what she wanted was Negan. So, she was going to do whatever she could to
get him. Unhooking the material, she let it fall down her arms and Negan’s lips parted when she
revealed her breasts to him. “Do you like what you see?”

“I do,” Negan growled, biting firmly at his bottom lip. The way his hazel eyes were looking over
her body that was revealed to him made her grow hot with desire. Brazenly, she moved across the
dressing room, pressing in closer to Negan and he smirked. “You’re gorgeous, but you know that.”

“Gorgeous. Now that’s the kind of word I want to hear from your mouth when you think about
me,” she seductively slurred, reaching for Negan’s hands and he tilted his head to the side. Urging
his large hands up, she led them to her breasts and shuddered when the warmth of them surrounded
her flesh. Negan was trying to read her reactions to all of this, but when she felt him palming over
her soft flesh himself it made her purr out.

The way Negan palmed over her breasts made her legs tremble and she desperately wanted to be
touched by him more. To have him take her in that small dressing room and she hoped by damn
near throwing herself at him that she could get that.

“Negan,” she sighed out his named when his right hand slid under her breast to cup at it before his
thumb circled over her nipple.

The way he teased over her flesh made her whimper and she attempted to tip up on her toes to kiss
him. When she almost made it, Negan moved in close to her. The warmth of his breath etched over
her skin and it made her quiver in his grasp. Just when she was about to reach his mouth, Negan
turned his head in time to descend his lips to the side of her neck. He kissed over her flesh making
her grasp tightly to his thick hair. It felt strange to have him deny her a kiss, but as he began to
press his kisses lower and lower, she let her worries escape her. Negan’s mouth pressed in over her
breast, taking her nipple into his mouth teasing and twisting his tongue over the taut flesh.

Negan’s mouth slid to her other breast and teased over her skin the same way he had done the other
and she tugged softly at his hair knowing that he was doting over her body. Urging his head back
she hungrily attempted to kiss him, but Negan denied her again and she let out a frustrated breath.

“Your breasts are perfect,” Negan informed her, licking over his lips. His deep raspy voice was
even deeper and his eyes were heavy with lust. Pressing herself forward against his body, she slid
her palm down his lower abdomen and toward the buckle of his belt.

Getting the material apart, she watched Negan look down and the bridge of his nose wrinkled
while she worked to get his pants open. Licking at his lips, Negan watched while her fingers
tugged apart the material of his pants and his breathing was uneven.

“You told me that I could get one feel,” she reminded him and Negan’s squared jaw flexed when
she tugged the zipper down in his pants. “I’d like to take you up on that offer…”

Attempting to dip her hand beneath his pants, Negan caught her wrist in his fingers before she
could. Negan’s hazel eyes were hooked on hers and she wanted so badly for him to kiss her while
he looked at her like that.

“That offer expired in the car,” Negan replied to her with a very small shrug and he pulled himself
out between the small space she had him cramped in. The sound of Negan pulling his pants
together was heard and she felt an astounding amount of embarrassment flooding her body when
Negan denied her again. Her face felt hot and she didn’t know what to say. With her heart
pounding away inside of her chest, she felt like some kind of cheap slut with what she had done and
yet Negan still turned her away.

“What is it you want Negan?” she blurt out with a disappointed sound and Negan lifted his stare to
her while he fixed his pants and pulled them back together. How was she supposed to be his, but he
didn’t want to kiss her or have her touch him?
“You want to know what I really want?” Negan reached up to brush his hair back, a long dramatic
breath pushing from his lips when he did it.

“Yeah,” she was desperate to hear it because she was starting to wonder if something was wrong
with her at this point. Why didn’t he want her?

“I want you to try on that dress,” Negan instructed and she nodded hearing him saying that. That’s
not at all what she wanted him to say. She was more so asking on a personal level what he wanted.
Especially when it came to her, but when he mentioned the dress, she could feel the dissatisfaction
carry over her. It took everything inside of her to build up that courage to try and seduce Negan, yet
she found herself falling short. Listening to what he wanted, she moved across the dressing room
and stopped trying to be sexy. There was no point in it anyway. She had been turned down more
times today than she cared to admit so she was just going to do what he wanted.

Pulling the material up her body, she stood before the mirror and watched Negan move in behind
her when she had it on. Negan’s thick fingers traced over her back when he tugged on the zipper at
the back of it to help her put it together.

“See…now that,” Negan hummed in approval, sliding his left hand over her hip while his right
reached up to press her hair away from her neck. Tipping down, Negan pressed teasing kisses over
the side of her neck and watched in the mirror as she closed her eyes when he did it. “It’s fucking
beautiful on you.”

“Yeah,” she pulled away from Negan, still finding herself upset with the way he handled things
previously. There was a confused expression over Negan’s features and she shrugged her
shoulders. “Well, you saw the dress. I guess you can leave now.”

“Okay…?” Negan’s head tilted to the side and he let out a hesitant laugh. “Do you want me to pull
the zipper down?”

“Go ahead,” she let out a frustrated sound and turned away from Negan. When Negan was done
with the zipper, she pulled herself forward and kept her attention away from him. “I’ll meet you
out there.”

“Okay,” Negan muttered once more and she didn’t care to look at him after everything. Not after
she threw it all out there and he turned her down so massively.

Negan left the dressing room and she got back into her clothes. Taking the dress out, she stopped
when she saw Negan standing at one of the jewelry counters talking to one of the sales associates.
It was a pretty, dark haired woman and they both seemed to be laughing. From where Y/N was
standing it looked like Negan was flirting with the woman and she felt her face flush over with heat
when she saw it. Had her stripping down in front of him made him realize that she wasn’t what he
wanted?

Y/N found herself frozen. Should she go and approach them or should she just stand there to wait
for Negan to finish? A sense of anger flooded her body when the woman reached out to place her
hand over Negan’s chest while she laughed. Shaking her head, she knew this was a horrible
mistake and she moved up to Negan.

“We’re good,” Y/N spoke out and Negan looked to her with the smile he had plastered over his
face while talking to the woman at the counter. When the sales associate noticed that Negan was
with Y/N a frown had pressed in over her lips and that’s when Y/N confirmed to herself that Negan
was in fact flirting with this woman.
“Well thank you,” Negan gave the woman a wink and moved out to Y/N who threw the items that
Negan had left in the dressing room into his arms. Negan fumbled with the clothes and then she
carelessly handed him the dress.

“There are other things I found that I liked,” she asserted and Negan just followed her around.

After seeing Negan so blatantly flirting with that other woman, Y/N found herself picking up
anything and everything that struck her fancy. Originally, she was trying to hold back, afraid that
Negan would be turned off by her, but after his display of how he felt in the dressing room she
didn’t care anymore. Seeing Negan interacting with that woman made her jealous and Y/N realized
that he probably lacked sexual interest in her.

They went from store to store doing the same exact thing. In fact, she barely spoke to Negan while
they did it. After one of their trips he had taken the bags to the car and when they headed back, he
held his hand out and offered a bright smile, “Do you wanna hold my hand?”

“No,” she stated with a blunt tone and Negan let out a shocked breath. Continuing to move back to
the mall area, she left Negan standing in the parking lot area and figured that this would likely be
her first and last day with Negan.

“Hey,” Negan called out and she stopped by the fountain to see Negan running up to her, his
expression confused when he approached her. “Did I miss something? Why are you acting like
this?”

“Why are you acting like what happened in the dressing room was normal?” she stammered
watching the way his jaw flexed and he shoved his hands into his pockets. “You clearly have no
interest in me after what I did. You denied me. Twice.”

“When did I say I had no interest in you?” Negan was flustered and she folded her arms out in front
of her chest. “I told you that you were beautiful and gorgeous.”

“You’re very blatant when you avoid kissing me,” she answered and Negan grunted when she said
it. “And then you won’t let me touch you and you won’t even consider sleeping with me, but I see
you flirting away with the sales associate at the fucking store.”

“Wow, you’re jealous,” Negan let out an amazed sound and a cocky smile spread over his features.
“That’s so cute.”

“Don’t mock me,” she retorted, rolling her eyes and moving over toward the bench by the fountain.
She was trying so hard not to explode on Negan when she sat down on the bench hoping to get
herself to calm down.

“I’m not mocking you,” Negan snorted and moved in beside her on the bench to sit beside her.
“Kissing is special. You know? When I kiss you for the first time, I want it to mean something.”

“My breasts disagree with your statement,” she pointed out and one of the people walking by them
shot them a shocked look making Negan laugh at her bluntness again. Negan had no problem
kissing her breasts, but he had a problem with actually kissing her?

“Well I will have to apologize to them later, but I just don’t want to fuck you and be done with
you,” Negan insisted with a hesitant breath. “This is the first day I’ve had with you and trust me I
want to fuck you, I do, but I want us to have something more than just that.”

“You told me yourself that this wasn’t something serious. You wanted someone to spend time with
and to pamper,” she recalled what he had said and Negan nodded his head. “So why won’t you
fuck me? Am I a beast that you don’t want to kiss and this is all a massive prank?”

“What would I gain from a prank?” Negan threw his hands up in the air and was clearly confused
by what she was saying. “When I have sex with people, they often lose interest with me. Not the
sex. They love the sex, but they could care less about me. Okay? I just want to get to know you
first and if we do have sex, I want it to be the right moment. Do you know how awkward the rest
of our time would be together if I would have fucked you in that dressing room?”

“So…what then? You’re going to make love to me?” she chuckled at his response and he rolled his
eyes.

“No, obviously not. I just want us to know each other a bit more before we start fucking like
monkeys. If all we’re doing is fucking and that’s what I’m paying you for…” Negan held his
hands up in the air and she felt her cheeks blush over. “I want to spend time with you. I want to
hang out.”

“And the girl in the store?” Y/N wanted answers and Negan dramatically shrugged. “Is she
someone else you want to start paying now too? Are you going to be her sugar daddy too?”

“No, you’re the only one that can claim that title,” Negan cracked a smile hearing her say that
term. “I’m a flirt, it’s just in my personality, but I don’t mean anything by it. Plus, the only reason I
was talking to her to begin with was because of this…”

Negan reached in his back pocket to pull out a long, narrow black box. Popping it open, he
revealed the white gold, diamond bracelet that he had bought for her. Y/N let out a gasp at the sight
of it and Negan pulled the bracelet out of the box dangling it before her.

“I saw this and I wanted to get it for you. I was trying to think of the right way to give it to you, but
now I suppose is just as good of a time as any,” Negan reached for her wrist and fumbled with the
bracelet to get it on her with his thick fingers. “I talked to her about the bracelet while you were in
the dressing room the first time and then I had to pick it up.”

“Well now I feel like an asshole,” she cussed to herself when Negan finally got the bracelet hooked
and she raised her wrist to look over the bracelet he had bought for her. Immediately she felt faint
looking at it. Never would she buy herself something so extravagant but looking at it made her in
awe of it. “How much was this Negan? You shouldn’t have gotten me this.”

“Stop saying that. I’m going to get you what I want to get you and that’s just that…” Negan
maintained, his thick eyebrows bouncing up and he shrugged his shoulders. “It doesn’t matter what
it cost, I just wanted to get it for you.”

“And now you probably think I’m crazy,” she sighed, lowering her head when she realized what a
mistake she had made in acting the way she did.

“No, I think you really fucking like me and you got upset at the idea of me potentially not liking
you,” Negan stated with a half laugh and he shrugged. “I like it. It means you are serious about this
whole thing and I don’t have to worry about things. You got fire in you and I fucking love it.”

“Not many people would take it as calmly as you are,” she pointed out feeling embarrassed by her
actions toward him.

“Eh, I should have been more open with you about things,” Negan blew off her comment and
waved his hand in the air dismissively. “I’d kind of like to take you out to lunch though and get to
know you like I was attempting to do. If that’s okay with you.”
“Yeah…I mean, sure,” she didn’t know what to say. She made an asshole of herself so she would
do whatever he wanted at this point.

“Will you hold my hand this time?” Negan held his hand out for hers and he looked up at her with
a big puppy dog expression in his eyes knowing that it would make her swoon. “Please?”

Lowering her hand into his, she felt his fingers hooking with her and he smiled brightly, “That’s
my girl.”

After Y/N and Negan had lunch together, they ended up just walking together for a while to get to
talk to one another. Negan was right, they really didn’t know each other and they needed to take
the time to learn about one another. They had to get through that awkward stage so they could
know each other better. They just talked about random life things while walking around and it was
nice. Negan was very chatty and talked a lot which was a nice difference from the men she was
used to. He was very open…about everything.

By the time they came back home, it was close to dinner time and when Negan had pulled into his
driveway, she found herself not wanting to leave, “So…”

“This has been nice,” Negan rubbed his hands over his thighs and looked over to Y/N to see her
playing with the bracelet that he had given her. “I was thinking…you might want to keep your stuff
at my house until you would have been working for a while. To keep things from your parents and
all.”

“Yeah. Yeah, that makes sense,” she agreed with him knowing that she felt guilty for all she had
bought since most of it she had done out of spite with being jealous. “I guess I should get home.”

“You know, about that…” Negan sucked his bottom lip into his mouth and shifted in the seat he
was in. “Why don’t you spend the night with me? Tell your family that you’re with a friend and
just…hang out?”

“Are you…are you sure?” she confirmed and Negan nodded. “Are you really okay with that? You
were big on the whole getting to know each other thing first.”

“I am sure. Plus, if we get to know each other faster who knows where this thing will go,” Negan
gave her a wink and he threw his hands up. “If you don’t want to, that’s okay and I understand, but
the offer is on the table.”

Of course she wanted to say yes. There was a curiosity to see what the inside of Negan’s home
looked like, but was this too soon? Especially since she wanted to get so close to him and Negan
made it clear that he didn’t want to do that yet.

“Am I pathetic for saying yes?” she blurt out and Negan snorted at her comment.

“Am I pathetic for offering it because I was hoping you would say yes,” Negan arched his right
brow and she shrugged. “Let’s grab your things and get you inside. You think you are safe from
your parents seeing you here?”

“Negan, they could be outside and they would never see me because they are so lost within
themselves,” she looked over her shoulder at her home and she shook her head. “I think I’ll be
fine.”

Helping Negan carry the things into a guest room in his home, she found herself staring at
everything when she walked around. She didn’t know what she was expecting, hell…she figured
there would be something odd about Negan, but there really wasn’t. He was just exceedingly…
normal.

When they were finished, they stood in Negan’s living room and her eyes were drawn to the photos
that Negan had around the room. On the fireplace she could see there was a photo of Negan and a
woman together and she assumed it was his wife that had passed away. So badly she wanted to ask
him about her, but she knew it would ruin the mood.

“So…” Negan rubbed his hands together and pointed toward the backyard. “I was thinking of
ordering some pizza and then going for a swim in the back. You want to join me?”

“I don’t have a suit,” she answered and Negan chuckled to himself, his head bobbing for a moment.
It was like he was asking her to come up with something without actually saying it. “I mean, I can
wear my bra and panties.”

“Sounds good,” Negan gave her a wink reaching for the bottom of his shirt and he swiftly pulled it
from his body. The noise she made was almost desperate when she looked over his long, slender
torso. The tattoos over his body drew her attention and she wanted to inspect him like he was a
work of art because God he was beautiful. “I’m going to go get my suit on.”

“Yeah?” she eyed him over when he kicked out of his boots and started to pull apart his belt in
front of her. It felt like he was teasing her while he backstepped toward the stairs.

“I would ask you if you wanted to watch me change, but after what happened today,” Negan pulled
the zipper down in his pants and pulled apart the material to reveal the thick curls of dark hair that
was exposed when he did it, “something tells me that wouldn’t lead us anywhere good.”

“You’re a fucking tease,” she watched him adjust the material of his pants leaving her desperately
wanting more as he moved up the stairs and she dropped down on his couch. How was she
supposed to have a normal relationship with him first when he was teasing her like this? There was
no way she was going to be able to keep her hands to herself tonight. Especially not with how
attracted to Negan she was. She wanted him and she wanted him bad.
 Chapter 4
Chapter Summary

Y/N spends the night with Negan and learns more about what makes him tick. The
desperation to have a stronger bond with Negan only grows, but she questions if Negan
feels the same.

Chapter Notes

Sorry that this took a while to update. Thanks for your patience!

“I want to be honest with you,” Y/N wiggled her feet in the water of Negan’s inground pool that
was in his backyard. She was sitting at the opposite end of the pool from Negan on the edge,
keeping a close eye on him. Negan also had his legs in the water. His palms were bracing his
weight on the ground behind him, leaving his abdomen stretched out while he quietly sat there. It
was hard for her not to stare with every movement his body made. When Negan came downstairs
in his bathing suit, she wanted so desperately to look at his body. To survey the tattoos that were
over him and be able to touch him. “I want to look at you like you’re a piece of art. It’s taking
everything inside of me not to come over there and look at your tattoos.”

“I never said you couldn’t you know,” Negan’s eyebrow arched in amusement with her confession.
His expression was wickedly cheeky and he was biting down on his bottom lip. The motion made
his dimples suck in and she let out a heavy exhale. “There’s just one part of me you can’t touch.”

“Thank you for the reminder,” she drew her tongue over her bottom lip debating if she was going
to make her move or not. By getting to be by Negan, the positive is that she was close to him. The
negative was that in being close to him she would want more. Knowing that she was addicted to
that feeling of being close to Negan, she pulled her feet from the pool and got up. Moving in beside
Negan, she took a seat next to him and surveyed over the tattoos on his arm that was closest to her.
“Can I?”

“You can,” Negan agreed to let her touch him and she raised his arm up to get a closer look. Her
fingertips traced over his flesh and she heard him snicker. It made her eyes look up and he
shrugged his shoulders. “I’m ticklish.”

“That’s…actually cute,” she smirked knowing that Negan impressed her the more she was with
him. Lowering her gaze back to his arm, she traced over his tattoos and found herself in awe of
them. “They’re all so different.”

“Well, I’m not a boring person and they all represent different parts of me,” Negan grunted turning
his body for her when she looked at his shoulder where he had a tattoo of a dog over his back
shoulder. “They all mean something to me.”

“If I had hours to look at you, I would,” she sighed, her breath pressing over his flesh making
Negan shudder when she did it.
“You’re going to be with me all night. You can look at whatever you want for as long as you
want,” Negan reminded her and it made her smile knowing that he was right. She was going to be
spending the night with him, just like he had asked of her. Taking advantage of the moment, she
found herself charmed with the freckles that were covering his shoulders and she leaned down to
kiss over them making him let out a quivering breath. “You never play fair.”

“And you do?” she slurred against his flesh, biting softly at his shoulder making him moan. “You
never told me why you wanted to do this Negan. Why do you want me spending the night?”

“Haven’t you ever wanted an air of mystery in your life?” Negan felt her arms wrapping around his
lower abdomen and she caressed her fingers through the thick hair that was covering his body. “Do
you want me to be honest with you or do you want a much more interesting story?”

“How about both?” she laughed and he reached down to caress over her arms with his rough
fingertips. “Tell me the truth, but make it good…”

“I think you’re addicted to my storytelling,” Negan frowned tilting his head to the side while she
kissed over his neck. Dragging his tongue over his bottom lip, he closed his eyes and appreciated
the warmth of her against him. “What if my storytelling ends up being better than the real thing?”

“Doesn’t matter. I want to hear it,” she hummed against his flesh which caused a chill to run down
his spine. “I’ve never wanted someone more than I want you.”

“That happens when someone tells no. You should know that. You’ve told me yourself that you
know how to play with someone’s emotions and get what you want,” Negan reminded her of what
she had said to him in the past about being able to get what she wanted. While it may have been
slightly the case that she was exceedingly interested in Negan because he wouldn’t sleep with her,
she knew there was more to it than that.

“It’s not just that. There is something strangely…I don’t know,” she couldn’t quite place her finger
on it. She didn’t even know how to describe it. Negan was sexy, yes, but there was something
about him that drew her to him. “Most men I would not be okay with this. I think if it was anyone
other than you, I would have told them off. Just with you, I don’t know. I’m drawn to you. Am I
the first person you’ve done this with?”

“Sat by the pool and flirted with?” Negan chuckled and she pinched at his nipple hearing him yelp
when she did it. The way Negan snorted when he giggled after she did it made her laugh herself.
His happiness was often so contagious. It was nice to see someone as smiley as Negan often was.
“If you’re talking about the whole sugar daddy thing…no. I haven’t done this with anyone else.”

“Do you plan to do this with people other than me?” she inquired feeling his fingers hooking with
hers to avoid having her touch him, but instead held her hands in his.

“At the moment, you’re the only one I want,” Negan grumbled, his eyes closing when he smiled
brightly. “I uh…I did this because I found you fucking spunky as shit and I was immediately
attracted to you. From the moment you came out of your house telling off your father, I knew that I
wanted to have you. That you needed to be mine.”

“Come on…” she laughed against the side of his neck and he made a dramatic sound when she
didn’t believe him. “No one wants that. I was being nuts and I was super fucking angry.”

“You would be surprised. I was enamored from the first moment I saw you,” Negan insisted with a
loud sigh and he kicked his foot up splashing some of the water across the pool. “The other part of
me heard that you needed help and I wanted to give it to you. I believed you. Leaving you in a
situation that you couldn’t control with no help knowing I could help you, it made me feel bad.
Plus, I knew if I just offered you the money you wouldn’t take it. You’re too stubborn.”

“Oh? Am I?” she laughed against his neck, pressing another kiss over his skin and he shuddered
the further up his neck she traveled until she kissed behind his ear. “You wanted to be my savior,
huh?”

“I wanted to help you,” Negan corrected her, pulling her hands from his body and he managed to
slip out of her arms into the water. A disappointed breath fell from her throat when she saw him
come up from under the water. He brushed his wet hair back and gave her a big smile. “Get in the
water.”

“I’m fine here,” she was reluctant and he wiggled his finger at her. His eyes narrowing when she
denied him what he asked of her. “Why should I?”

“Because I said so…” Negan growled and it made her smile. It shouldn’t have, but hearing Negan
being demanding like that turned her on. Even though it was strange, she liked him telling her what
to do. Obeying, she hopped into the pool with him and found herself gazing over his wet body.
Every line in his body was enhanced now that he was wet. It was hard not to gawk because his
long, slender body was so enticing. Swimming in closer to him, she noticed that Negan’s eyes were
hooked on her lips and it made her think that was a good sign. “I think you purposely want to be
disobedient so you get punished.”

“So what if I do?” she felt Negan’s fingers curling around the back of her neck when the warmth of
his breath etched over her lips. “I can’t help if I want to be spanked by you.”

“Is that so?” Negan let out a cocky sound and his tongue flicked out over his bottom lip. “We’ll
have to see what I can do to make that happen for you.”’

It felt like Negan just might kiss her, but the pressure of his hand over the back of her neck pressed
her in underneath the water making her let out a gasp when she pushed herself back up over the
water, “I don’t care if you’re paying me to spend time with you. I’m going to get you back for
that.”

A jolt filled her body when she pressed her wet hair back and heard Negan snicker before
swimming away from her. Chasing after him, she managed to grab a hold of his long legs hearing
his laughter filling the air. Swimming in closer to him, she pushed his head under the water to dunk
him much as he had done to her. When he rose back above the surface, she found herself smiling
with the reaction he had.

“Not cool,” Negan snickered wiping at his eyes and he felt her hands sliding in over his shoulders.
Reaching out, he drew her closer to him in the water and let out a long sigh. It was hard not wanting
to kiss him being this close to him in the water. Even underneath the water, Y/N felt his hands
sliding up the sides of her body making her involuntarily shake. It managed to make a sharp breath
escape her lips and Negan knew what he was doing to her. Everything felt perfect until she felt the
solid metallic of Negan’s wedding ring against her flesh. It drew her attention to his left hand and
she let out a conflicted sound. “What?”

“There is a big part of me that feels wrong for wanting you so much while you’re wearing that,”
she confessed and Negan swallowed down hard. His eyes lowered and he lifted his hand to eye
over the wedding ring that he still had on. “I feel like I’ve got my eyes on a married man.”

“I’m sorry, I just…I’m not comfortable with taking it off yet,” Negan explained with a stuttering in
his words, but she reached out to brush her fingers through his wet hair. “I guess that’s my other
secret as to why I did this.”

“I’m confused,” she tilted her head to the side knowing that Negan seemed to be open enough with
her, but this whole thing still had her questioning things in general.

“Everything I said was true earlier, but I’m also…lonely,” Negan bit into his bottom lip. The way
Negan was tracing the pad of his thumb over his wedding ring drew her attention to it and she felt
guilty for taking advantage of a man that just lost his wife not long ago.

“You do know you could get anyone you wanted, right? So many women would love to be with
you?” she pointed out and Negan’s jaw flexed, his eyes raising to hers when she said it. “You
could never be alone if you wanted.”

“That’s not the kind of relationship I want. I know I could bring home random screws every night.
I’ve been at that stage in my life already. I want something different,” Negan grunted with a shrug
of his shoulders.

“You’d rather make a deal with someone to pay them to spend time with you?” she regretted those
words as soon as they came out because they sounded harsher than she meant for them to.

“Listen, relationships take work. What we’re doing here, you get help with money toward your
schooling and I get what I want which is to spend time with someone. I don’t have to worry about
what I’m doing right or wrong. I don’t really have to worry about pretending to be someone I’m
not. We have a deal, I’m here getting what I want and you are getting something out of this in the
end too,” Negan rambled, waving his hand in the air while he spoke, clearly trying to play this
whole thing out in his head too. “I’m helping you, but you’re also helping me too.”

“I kind of feel like I’m taking advantage of you,” she informed Negan with a frown and she could
feel Negan’s palms pressing in over the sides of her body again beneath the water making her
shudder. It was best to be honest with him and that’s what she was going to attempt to do. If she
told anyone about what she was doing with Negan, she was sure they would lecture her about
taking advantage of a poor widowed man.

“I think we’re both taking advantage of each other in a way,” Negan suggested with an arch of his
eyebrow, “but if I get to pamper you along the way, I don’t mind. It seems like you need a little bit
of that.”

“There are parts of me that I wish you were pampering…” she began in a seductive slur making
Negan lower his head against the side of her neck while he snickered at her eagerness. “You know
you’re teasing me.”

“I know, I’m sorry. I’m just…I’m a flirt,” Negan confessed with a wide smile when he pulled his
head back. “My wife hated it. Even when I was in trouble, I’d be flirty with her and it was hard for
her to be mad at me.”

“You really loved her, huh?” Y/N asked him and Negan’s eyes narrowed. His expression got very
serious and he nodded while looking away from her. Sliding her hand in over his thick neck, Y/N
looked him over and bit at her bottom lip. “What was she like?”

“You don’t want to hear about that,” Negan snorted, his eyebrows furrowing when she asked him
to talk about Lucille.

“Yes, I do,” Y/N hoped in talking about his late wife that he would be able to loosen up with her
and be able to talk about things. It was about making him comfortable and she wanted him to feel
relaxed with her. “I feel like maybe it will make you happier or at least let you realize that it’s okay
to just…talk to me. I’m not just here to try to nail you.”

“You’re funny,” Negan feigned a smile, but it was clear that he was upset with the idea of his wife
on his mind. “She was…beautiful. Spunky. A damn spitfire with a mouth on her. Not afraid to put
people in their place.”

“Sounds familiar,” Y/N teased, poking Negan in the chest playfully and she took notice of the way
his eyes were looking her over. “Oh. Wait a second…”

“Please don’t get weirded out,” Negan muttered holding onto her with a loose grasp and his
Adam’s apple bounced in his throat. “I know it’s odd for a man to tell you that you remind him of
his dead wife. Yes, you have a lot of similarities, but you both are so vastly different. I just…when
you stormed out of that house chewing your father out, I just fucking saw Lucille in that moment. It
was totally something she would have done.”

“Wow, this makes a lot of sense the more we talk,” she felt her heart aching for the man she only
just started to scratch the surface with in getting to know him. “So, your wife was a pain in the ass
like me?”

“Yeah. I guess you could say that,” Negan laughed, his eyebrows bouncing up as he reached out to
brush some of Y/N’s hair out of her face, “but always for the right reasons.”

“So, did you tell her your sex stories too to make her turn to mush as well before you got with her?”
Y/N teased, trailing her finger down the center of his chest and Negan lowered his gaze to watch
her tracing over his body. “Is that what got her?”

“Lucille was the first person I ever had sex with,” Negan admitted and Y/N was taken aback from
that. “Yeah, she was my high school girlfriend and I fell fucking hard. We didn’t last in high school
because she dumped me. I mean I was counting on my skills as a baseball player to get me through
life and she was smart as hell. I counted on the fact that my family had money to get me through
things too. I’m sure she didn’t see much of a future in that.”

“Well, clearly that wasn’t the case,” Y/N reached for Negan’s hand and hooked his fingers with
hers drawing attention to his wedding band. “You guys got married and she turned you into a sex
freak.”

“Ha-ha,” Negan rolled his eyes and she smirked glad to see him laugh when she said that. “I got
injured and I think she felt bad for me. That’s probably why we got back together. The one thing I
was counting on, I no longer had. So…”

“And you decided after everything you wanted to be a teacher?” she was more intrigued with the
man before her the more he actually talked about his past. While they had gotten to know each
other decently well while they were walking at the mall, getting to hear about his past made him
less of someone she wanted to just sexualize and more like someone she just wanted to get to
know. “Your family had money and you wanted to become a teacher?”

“Do I sense some smart ass in that question?” Negan’s eyebrow perked up and Y/N shrugged her
shoulders. “I like helping people. I like being able to teach the things I know and help maybe lead
someone to do what I was never capable of. That’s why I coach the sports teams I do. I hope I can
help someone reach their full potential.”

“And what was your family well off for?” Y/N pressed further and Negan groaned, clearly not
proud of talking about the reason he had money.
“My father was just a businessman who really liked money,” Negan clearly didn’t want to talk
about what his father had done. “He was a tight ass though. He liked having the money. I like
having the moments in life. Sure, I like having some materialistic things, but I feel like life is about
moments. Not how much money you have. So, if I can share the wealth I have with other people,
I’m going to.”

“That’s very charitable of you,” she palmed in over Negan’s chest and heard his breathing getting
heavier when she did it. “So, I’m someone you are sharing your wealth with?”

“To a degree,” Negan responded while her hands hooked around his neck again, “but truthfully…
I’ve enjoyed every moment I’ve gotten to share with you and I look forward to getting to be around
you more.”

Y/N found herself in awe of Negan and the way he was looking at her. Leaning in, she heard his
breath catch in his throat when the warmth of her breath pressed in over his flesh. Swiping her
thumb over the curve of his jawline, Y/N could see that Negan’s hazel eyes were hooked on hers.

“I really like you,” Y/N announced and Negan grinned, his head nodding once. “Like, a lot.”

“And I really like you…like a lot too,” Negan teased, his nose wrinkling while she took her time
tracing over his face. With the closeness and their confessions, Y/N felt like it was a perfect time to
try to kiss Negan. Taking advantage of things, Y/N pressed forward attempting to get closer to
Negan to kiss him. When Negan noticed what she was doing, he quickly turned his head away
from her. His rejection made her let out an unsatisfied breath and immediately made things
uncomfortable.

“Not enough to kiss me though,” she pulled away from his grasp and watched him eye her over
while she swam toward the other end of the pool. There was no doubt that she was disappointed
with his refusal and he let out a tense grunt. “I felt like it was a good moment.”

“I kind of want to be in control of when we kiss,” Negan informed her, his eyes narrowing while he
gazed out at her. She seemed irritated with him and Negan shrugged his shoulders. “You have to
understand…”

“I know,” she waved her hand in the air to dismiss anything he had to say and Negan grunted
behind her when she turned away from him. Resting her arms against the side of the pool, she
looked around his yard and thought about what she was doing. She reminded him enough of his
wife to want to be around her, but not enough for him to want to get personal with her. “Do you go
swimming a lot?”

“I just want our special moments to be…special,” Negan’s voice pressed in against the side of her
neck making her jump with how quiet he had been when moving in behind her in the pool. Negan’s
hands grasped at her hips and she could feel his lips descending over her shoulder making her eyes
come to a tight close. “While this might be a relationship of convenience, I still want things to be
kind of special.”

“I feel like a lot of the moments have been special,” Y/N stated with a harsh breath when Negan
nipped softly at her neck making her arch her head to the side. Negan’s tongue traced over her flesh
before he deposited faint kisses over the side of her neck. “Most people kiss first before doing
some of the things we’ve already done.”

“Mmm, but kissing is so intimate. Kissing is special,” Negan growled against her flesh and it
caused a chill to run down her spine, “but you’re looking for daddy to pamper you, aren’t you?”
“Yes,” she purred leaning further back into the warmth of Negan’s chest while he continued to kiss
over the side of her neck.

“That’s what I thought,” Negan slid his hands up her abdomen toward her breasts to caress over
them. “I can give you a little something…”

The trailing of Negan’s fingertips on his right hand over her abdomen caused her to whimper. They
traced lines over her revealed flesh while his kisses descended from her neck toward her shoulder.
All he had to do was touch her and she was a shivering mess in his arms.

“You are something else, you know that?” Negan hummed against her neck while his fingertips
reached the top of the panties that she was wearing. Dipping his fingers beneath the material,
Negan felt her tensing up in his arms and he chuckled against her flesh. “Don’t get nervous on me
now.”

“Negan,” her eyes slammed shut when he palmed in over her warmth beneath the water tracing
over the most intimate parts of her body. The way his fingers danced over her body made a cry fall
from her lips and Negan released a moan of approval. “You like me touching you, huh?”

“Yes,” she panted while Negan’s fingertips circled in over her clitoris. Drawing slow caresses over
her sensitive bundle of nerves made her lean back further against him. Reaching back, she grasped
at Negan’s hip and felt her heart pounding inside of her chest. “So much.”

“Good,” Negan growled, biting at her earlobe in a playful tug while her hips bucked up toward the
caress he had over her body.

A gasp fell from her throat when Negan pulled his hand from her panties and turned her to him.
More than anything she wanted to touch him, but he lifted her up and urged her out onto the side of
the pool. Negan pulled himself out beside her and slid in next to her. Lowering his head, Negan’s
mouth brushed over her throat and his tongue flicked small lines against her skin. Desperately she
reached up to grab a hold of his wet hair when his fingers buried beneath the material of her panties
to connect with her body again causing her to cry out.

“Look at me,” Negan ordered as he slid in closer to her and her eyes connected with his. Negan
used his free hand to pull her thighs further apart for him before his middle finger circled over her
entrance. Dragging out the time, Negan knew the longer he did it, the more it would affect her.
Y/N’s pupils were dilated with lust and he felt his heart pounding inside of his chest. With her hips
rocking toward his caress, Negan knew that she desperately wanted him to touch her. Teasing her
with the idea that he might press his finger inside of her made her cry out and she buried her face
against the side of his neck. After enticing her and getting her worked up, Negan finally pushed his
long slender digit into her tight body. It made her gasp and drop her head back. Negan was thankful
for that. He wanted to see her reaction to all of this. “Fuck…”

A fire burned deep inside of Negan when he watched her eyes close and she bit at her bottom lip.
Lowering his head, Negan looked down while he started slowly thrusting his finger into the
warmth of her body. Sure, this was faster than he would have liked things to be going, but she was
desperate for some kind of attention from him and he was willing to give it to her. He needed her to
know that he was interested in her while leaving her feeling pampered at the same time.

Taking his time, he could feel her clasping to him and it drew his eyes back to hers. Licking his
lips, he watched her face twist with pleasure. Inserting a second finger, Negan made sure to caress
them over her G-spot while he fingered her. The friction of his palm was rubbing against her
clitoris which aided in what he was doing and she found herself falling in against him.
“Negan,” she cried out his name while his fingers skillfully pumped inside of her. Each thrust felt
incredible and she rocked her hips into the movements while Negan kissed over her jawline. Her
body was shaking, straining to keep some kind of control over what was happening, but what he
was doing to her felt unbelievable.

“Almost there,” Negan slurred against her flesh watching her body tremor and he moved his
fingers faster inside of her.

Breathless moans fell from Y/N’s throat while she buried her head against the side of Negan’s neck
and her heart felt like it was going to beat right out of her chest.

“Are you going to cum?” Negan questioned and she nodded. Negan took his free hand and grasped
at her jaw to get her to look at him. The way his eyes were hooked on her, wanting to see every
reaction he pulled from her made this so much hotter. Reaching down, she grasped at Negan’s
wrist when her body started to twitch and shake. A hum fell from Negan’s throat when he realized
that he got her to her orgasm. Continuously he pumped his fingers inside of her until the very end
of her orgasm leaving her a shaking mess.

So easily Negan had brought her to an orgasm and by the look on his face she could tell that he was
proud. Y/N was clasping tightly to Negan as he dragged his fingers sluggishly from her body and
out of her panties.

“Good girl,” Negan praised Y/N, pressing a kiss against her forehead and he caressed over her
shoulders while she shook in his arms. When Y/N lifted her head, Negan’s eyes were hooked on
hers and he smiled in a cocky fashion. “This really worked an appetite in me…”

“Yeah?” she watched Negan lift his fingers to mouth to wrap his lips around the two fingers that
were inside of her. The way his tongue twisted over his fingers in an erotic sweep drew her body to
go immediately weak. By the look on his face, she knew that he was doing it to tease her but
watching him suck at his fingers made her hot all over again. The sight alone caused her core to
ache even more than before with how badly she truly wanted him.

A moan fell from Negan’s throat when he got the taste of her from his fingers and slowly dragged
them from his mouth. Licking over his lips, Negan could tell that she was even more desperate
now for him than she was before.

“It’s probably a good time to order that pizza we talked about earlier. I’ll get some of my clothes
for you to wear,” Negan brushed his fingers through her wet hair before giving her a wink.
Carefully Negan stood up and reached to help her up to her feet as well. Negan reached for a towel
and urged her to move to him. It was hard to move because her legs were still shaking from what
he had done to her, but when she got to him, Negan wrapped the towel around her from behind and
held her in his arms tightly. “Good?”

“Great,” she muttered and Negan pressed a subtle kiss over her cheek making her close her eyes
when the stubble from his short beard scratched at her skin.

“Wonderful,” Negan gave her a wink and reached for his own towel to wipe himself down. When
he was done, he reached for his pack of cigarettes that were on the table and took one between his
lips. Turning to look at her, Negan grabbed his lighter and shrugged. “Do you have a pizza
preference?”

“Whatever you like,” she licked her lips watching him take a big puff of his cigarette before
nodding and pointing back toward the house.
“You good?” Negan confirmed and she took a moment to think about it before quickly saying yes.
Negan gave her a wink before heading back into the house.

Y/N’s body was on fire and it took a while for her to come back down from her high. How simple
it was for Negan just to move onto the next thing surprised her. The amount of self-control that
Negan had was ridiculous. How easily he was able to get her to an orgasm surprised her because it
had never been like that with someone before. Usually she would have to work herself up to feel
like that, but Negan seemed like he knew just the right things to do to get her to reach that high
which left her craving so much more than she was given.

It was hard not mentioning what happened. Especially since it left her aching for more. Y/N
wanted to experience it again. She longed to have his long slender fingers inside of her, touching
her in the most intimate of ways. Eating pizza and watching movies together just felt awkward after
everything. While she got more than she expected from him, it wasn’t exactly enough for her.

“I never pictured you to be a horror movie kind of guy,” Y/N finally broke the silence looking over
at Negan from where he was seated beside her. Her eyes surveyed over his long body, enjoying the
way that his white tank top clung to his slender body. Negan had given her one of his t-shirts and a
pair of his boxers to wear upon her request of what she would like that was his so she didn’t have to
be in wet clothes for pajamas. “I figured you might be like an action movie kind of person.”

“I watch a little bit of everything,” Negan simply shrugged and he reached out to grab a hold of her
hand to hook his fingers with hers. “I was kind of hoping that maybe you would be a little freaked
out and want me to hold you, but I should have known better. You’re a bad ass, so you being afraid
of a horror movie…”

“Oh…well, I can pretend I am,” she feigned a nervous sound and cuddled in next to Negan hearing
him chuckle. Negan wrapped his arm around her shoulders and caressed over her arm, enjoying the
warmth of her pressed up against him. The way his chin nestled in over the top of her head made
her smile while she rest her head against the center of his chest. Being this close to someone felt
good. It made her feel safe and she actually liked that. It was strange how easily Negan did that for
her.

“Much better,” Negan muttered with a long sigh. While they continued to watch the movie
together, she couldn’t help but focus on the way his fingers softly stroked over the back of her neck
and shoulders while he held her to him. The gentle sweep was so comforting and tender.

“Did your wife like movies like this?” Y/N stammered, her fingers tracing over Negan’s abdomen
while she got more comfortable against him.

“She was into the Bond films,” Negan snorted when he thought back to Lucille. “I didn’t really get
it myself. Maybe she wanted me to be more like that.”

“I don’t think so. I’m sure she liked you just the way you were,” Y/N denied his claim and reached
for the bottom of his tank top, balling the material up in her palm. Slowly it revealed the hair
dusted flesh beneath. Teasingly stretching out her fingers over Negan’s lower abdomen, she slid
them over his skin and heard the sound of his breathing change.

“I’m kind of boring,” Negan suggested and he heard her snicker when he said it. Biting into his
bottom lip, he watched her head lower so she could kiss right below his navel. “Nothing like
Bond.”

“You’re ridiculously charming. Suave. Sexy. All the things that Bond has,” Y/N slurred against his
flesh, softly nipping at his skin. “But you’re so much better.”
“That sounds a bit biased,” Negan reached out to brush his fingers through her hair while she
continued to pepper kisses over his long torso. Lifting his body, Negan felt her hand slide up from
his lower abdomen toward the center of his chest. “But I’ll take it.”

“I love your body,” her mouth continued to press wet kisses over Negan’s torso. There was
something mesmerizing about the way he was breathing with his chest rising and falling. Pushing
his shirt further up toward the center of his chest, she centered her mouth in over one of his nipples
and heard him groan. “Can you take this off?”

Giving her what she asked of him, Negan lifted up enough to help discard his white tank top and
heard her let out a pleased sound when he did it. The way her fingers danced over his body made
him lick over his lips. It was clear she was in awe of his body and he was amazed how she was
focusing on every detail of his abdomen.

“Hey…” Negan watched her get to her knees on the floor before him and he let out a nervous
breath. “What are you doing?”

“Relax,” she hushed him, sliding her hands over his thighs. The way his hazel eyes were hooked on
hers turned her on so much and she was eager to please him much as he had done earlier to her.
Pushing his legs apart, she situated herself between them and continued to palm over the top of his
legs through his pajama pants.

“Fuck,” Negan’s head dropped back as her lips caressed over the area right below his navel again.
A sharp wince fell from his throat when she reached for the waistband of his pajama pants. Pulling
them down very slowly, her lips followed the movements before taking a minute to look down to
eye over the perfect v-line of his slender hips. When she hooked her fingers tightly into his pants,
she attempted to pull the material down further to reveal him to her, but Negan stopped her by
grabbing a tight hold of her wrists. “No.”

“Negan, if you are smaller than you said…it’s okay,” she insisted, her breath catching in the back
of her throat while she looked up at him. His eyes narrowed out at her and she shook her head. “I
don’t care if it’s small. I want to pleasure you.”

“It’s not small,” Negan pulled his legs away from her and pulled his pajama pants back up his hips.
There was a sense of annoyance over his face and she felt a panicked breath fall from her lips.
“Why would I lie about that?”

“To make me want you more?” she muttered with a shrug of her shoulders, not sure what to say in
response. There had to be a reason that Negan was so against the idea of her seeing him naked or
going through with sexual things.

“Are you that desperate to see my dick?” Negan breathed out and she knew that she had to be
honest with him. She nodded and gave a confused shrug. Was that so bad? Negan had seen most of
her and had already done more with her than she had him. “Stand up and take yourself to the coffee
table. Sit on the edge of it.”

“Negan…” she went to bicker with him, but he snapped his fingers and she unhurriedly obeyed
him. Standing to her feet she moved to the coffee table before him. Lowering herself down, she
could see Negan’s eyebrows clench together and she licked her lips.

“Touch yourself,” Negan swallowed down hard and she watched his lips part while his hand slid in
over his lower abdomen caressing over his own body. “If you want to see my cock…do what I
say.”
“Yes daddy,” she spread her legs apart and braced herself on the edge of the coffee table. Reaching
her hand beneath the material of the boxers that Negan had given her, she traced over her body.
Licking at her lips, she could see Negan surveying her over with his very serious eyes. Immediately
upon his request, goosebumps spread down her arms. There was a desperation in getting to see him
naked but having him request something sexual of her while he watched her made her so much
more excited. “I prefer when it’s you touching me.”

“I’m sure you do,” Negan lowered his palm and squeezed his body over the material of his pajama
pants and an enthusiastic purr fell from her throat. The way Negan bit at his bottom lip and tilted
his head to the side made her caress over herself harder. “You’re fucking stunning.”

Circling her fingertips over her sensitive bundle of nerves, she found herself eager and so much
more willing than she would have expected to be while in front of someone with them watching
her. A flush of warmth spread throughout her face when she watched Negan’s hand slide beneath
the band of his pajama pants. Watching his palm’s movement beneath the material made her let out
a shuddering breath and Negan lifted his eyes to hers.

“You know,” Negan’s jaw flexed and he cussed to himself. A dramatic sound escaped his throat
and he pulled his hand from his pants. “I don’t want to do this right now. You’re fucking beautiful
and I think the world of you, but I just want us to be more than this.”

“What?” she felt suddenly embarrassed in front of him. Pulling her hand out from the material she
watched Negan lean forward on the couch and bury his head into his hands. “Is it me?”

“No, it’s not you,” Negan shook his head, lifting his eyes up to hers. When he shrugged, she wasn’t
sure how to respond. “I’m incredibly attracted to you, but…”

“Don’t worry about it,” she held her hand out to get him to stop his explanation and Negan’s throat
tensed. “I can only take so many rejections Negan. If you don’t want us to have this kind of
relationship and you just want someone to spend time with…let me know. Because if that’s what
you want, I have to train my mind to stop being so attracted to you.

“I want both,” Negan explained shifting on the couch. “I want to have a relationship where the two
of us spend a lot of time together, but eventually we can make things sexual. Right now, I just want
to focus on us getting to know each other better.”

“You sure seemed fine earlier when you were fingering me by the side of the pool,” she reminded
him of what he had done and the vein in his neck became suddenly more prominent. “I’m getting
so many mixed signals here.”

“The whole point of this was to be able to spend time with someone and not have to worry about
being in a relationship,” Negan snorted and his eyes narrowed when he looked out at her. “We’re
not in a relationship and yet I’m worried about how you’re feeling.”

“So, you want me to turn my feelings off?” she replied, folding her arms out in front of her chest.

“I just kind of want to do things at my own pace,” Negan answered, throwing his hands up in the
air. “I hate complicated and I just think sex complicates things so much.”

“Whatever you want Negan,” she frowned moving in beside him on the couch while going back to
watching the movie he had put on. “I’m sorry for being pushy.”

“I appreciate that you are attracted to me, I do…” Negan tried to put together how he was feeling,
but he could tell that she really didn’t care to hear it. While she sat beside him on the couch, she
could tell that he was watching her trying to read her reactions to everything. It was obvious he was
staring at her, but she tried to act like it didn’t bother her as the film continued. The soft sweeping
of Negan’s fingertips over her thigh was felt and she lowered her head to see him hold his hand out
as if asking her to hold it. “Please?”

Giving him a sideways expression, she sighed and accepted his hand to hold it. They finished the
movie and after it was over, Negan stood from the couch and pulled her up into his arms. The
closeness of him always excited her, but at this point she was learning to know better than to expect
something from Negan.

“I’m tired,” Negan pulled her enough to have her follow him up the stairs to his bedroom. Y/N had
yet to see Negan’s bedroom, but he didn’t really give her the time to look around. He moved
immediately for the bed and got comfortable. Y/N stood at the bottom of the bed knowing that
being in bed with him would be a dangerous thing. With Negan patting the bed beside him, she
knew he was beckoning her and it made her let out a nervous gasp of air. It felt strange crawling
into bed with Negan while he lifted the covers up for her to join him. Badly she wanted to be upset
with him for turning her down again sexually, but with his arms wrapped tightly around her while
they laid in bed together, she found herself feeling like everything was right in the world. Never
before had she had someone like this hold onto her and make her feel needed. It was something she
never felt like she needed but getting to experience it was something absolutely incredible. “I’m
sorry I’m so weird, I just have been so incredibly lonely.”

The vibration of Negan’s words against her neck made her shudder. With him nuzzling his nose
against the side of her neck, it led the warmth of his breath to press over her flesh and she found
herself leaning in closer to him.

“I’ve just missed being able to talk to someone,” Negan pressed a soft kiss against the back of her
neck and she closed her eyes at the closeness of him. Her fingers hooked with Negan’s while he
held her near to him. “It’s just nice to finally feel like I’m not alone.”

“And I understand that and I get it now. You just want to have someone here with you,” Y/N
brought his hand to her lips to press a kiss over the back of it and she caressed her thumb over his
large hand. “I think the place I just got confused is with you teasing me. It’s been so sexual and if I
would have known from the get-go that you didn’t want sex, then I think I could have prepared
myself better. Now I know. I promise I won’t expect anything from you.”

“That is my fault,” Negan admitted, cherishing the warmth of her in his arms. It had been so long
since he had been able to hold anyone in his arms and he liked it. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay,” she shrugged finding herself getting more and more comfortable while she laid in his
arms. “This is nice.”

“It is,” Negan listened to the sounds of her breathing change when she easily fell asleep in his arms
and he felt a lump growing in his throat when she did.

It was clear that this girl truly, genuinely liked him. If he kept teasing her like he was and didn’t
give her something in return he was worried that she would get bored with him. For fucks sake he
wasn’t really that interesting to begin with. If he didn’t give her something more to stick around, he
panicked that she would stop wanting to be near him. Pressing a kiss against her jawline, Negan
held her tighter in his arms and thought about enjoying having her with him. This was so wrong on
so many levels, but it had been so nice having her here with him. What turned out as something
simple was something he realized he ended up liking more than he thought he would. Originally,
he just wanted to help someone who reminded him of his wife while also getting help to feel like
he wasn’t completely alone. Unfortunately, things were so much more serious than that for Y/N
and he didn’t want to ruin everything.

Cuddling in closer to her in the bed he hoped that maybe he would be able to give her something
that she wanted so she’d be satisfied being with him. At first, he thought it was all the things he
bought her and the thought of the money, but maybe he could loosen his rules just a little bit if it
meant keeping her happy.

How easy it was to get comfortable was surprising. They both slept well into the morning and by
the time Y/N woke up it was because Negan was moving behind her pulling her from her slumber.
Looking over her shoulder, she could see that Negan was sitting on the edge of the bed rubbing at
his neck. Stretching out her body, she let out a pleased sound and smiled.

“I feel better sleeping over here than I have at home…ever,” she informed him and Negan looked
over his shoulder at her with a smirk. It was almost charming to see because Negan’s hair was
ridiculously messy while he brushed his fingers through it. “Sleeping in your arms is the most
comfortable I’ve been in a very long time.”

“Yeah?” Negan found himself amused with her confession and he slowly stood from the bed.
Turning himself to face her, Negan yawned and stretched out his body. The way she watched his
body’s movements made him smile because she was hiding nothing. With the way her eyes looked
over his naked torso, he knew exactly where her mind was, but she wasn’t going to approach how
she felt after what happened the day before. “You know…”

“Yeah?” she bit into her bottom lip, trying to force herself to look away from Negan’s slender
body.

“I have that room that we put your stuff in. It’s honestly a room I never use. It’s a guest room, I
don’t have a lot of guests. So how about we make that room…your room?” Negan suggested and
her eyes seemed to narrow. It was obvious she was interested in what he was suggesting. “You’re
going to be here a lot. For your family to assume that you’re working every night, I think you
should have a spot for yourself where you can go to relax if you need to.”

“I couldn’t do that to you. This is your home Negan,” she reminded him with a long sigh. While it
sounded nice to have a permanent place for her to be in his home, she wondered if that was them
approaching things way too fast. “We can just keep it the way you want.”

“I don’t know how I wanted it. I just threw furniture in there and you saw the way it is. I’m no
interior designer. How about we go to the home improvement store and pick out some paint? Get
some furniture in here that you may want and make that room something you would like to be in,”
Negan offered, folding his arms out in front of his chest. “I have a free day and I think it would be a
good idea for us to be able to work together on a project. See how we work together in an everyday
kind of scenario.”

“You want to paint a room together?” Y/N pulled herself up on the bed and found herself actually
smiling at the idea. “Are you sure you are okay with that idea? You would be okay with me
making that room all mine?”

“Well, it was my idea,” he reminded her with a sigh, reaching up to brush his fingers through his
thick hair to slick it back. “If I offer it, I think maybe you should take me up on it. I mean, unless
you have some other shit that you want to do today.”

“You know what?” she pulled her legs up to her chest and thought about what he was putting on
the line. “It sounds fun. Let’s do it.”
“Okay, well get up and get ready. We can check out the room before we leave so you can get an
idea of what you might want in there. Then we’ll get breakfast somewhere. Afterwards we’ll go to
the stores and get started,” Negan rubbed his hands together and he actually seemed excited at the
idea of this which made her smile. It meant that Negan wanted a permanent place for her to be and
that was something that seemed like a good thing.

Both of them got ready rather quick and just went to breakfast at a small diner. Most of the time
Negan talked to her about what she would want to do with the room that they were going to be
working on. Throughout breakfast, he would ask her about things she liked as if trying to gather an
idea of what she wanted while they were eating. There was no doubt that he was enthusiastic to
give her things that would make her comfortable in his home and she found it quite charming.

When they went to go pick out paint, it was startling how long something like that actually took.
Y/N had never really been involved with doing something like that. This was something that would
be permanent for a while so she wanted to pick something that he liked too, but he was clear that he
was changing the room for her so he wanted her to be completely in charge. The anxiety it actually
caused was bizarre. She wanted Negan happy at the same time but tried doing what he asked of her.
Mostly, Negan stood in the back and let her choose the colors she liked and when they went
furniture shopping, he often was leading her toward the more expensive things which made her feel
guilty. Obviously, she liked nice things, but she didn’t want him going all out for her with just a
room that she would be in sometimes to escape her family.

By the time they were finally done shopping, it was already midday and she couldn’t believe how
long certain things took to do. Negan was eager to start moving things out of the room and it
amazed her that he was this pumped to get things started.

“Are you sure you can carry this?” Negan stood at the opposite end of the dresser that they were
about to move. Everything else they easily moved out of the room together as a team, but he knew
this piece was heavier than the others. “I should probably just do this one on my own.”

“And have you kill yourself? I can handle this,” she insisted and Negan snickered with her
enthusiasm. She certainly was determined if nothing else and Negan appreciated that about her. It
was heavy, but Y/N was doing her best to impress Negan. Later things might hurt, but she was
going to do her best to keep up with him moving things. When they were done moving the dresser
into the hallway, she felt Negan moving in behind her to caress his palms over her arms and up
toward her shoulders. “Told you I could handle it.”

“You sure did,” Negan chuckled, leaning down to deposit a soft kiss over her cheek. “You are such
a badass.”

“Thank you,” she winked back at him before returning to the room to get started on rolling out the
drop cloth to protect the floor for their painting. When everything was ready, Negan had grabbed
them some of his older clothes to wear. It was kind of fun getting to work on a project with Negan.
He was exceedingly outgoing while he was doing it and had her continuously laughing while they
got everything prepped. “You sure you’re okay with this color?”

“What did I say?” Negan grumbled with a smirk, his dimples sucking in while he prepared the
primer for them to put on the walls first. “I guess I will work on this part and you can work on the
opposite side. Then we’ll meet somewhere in the middle.”

“This was a really big project for you to want to do today. You know it’s probably going to take all
day,” she pointed out and Negan shrugged his shoulders. “You really are spontaneous, aren’t you?”

“I like it that way,” Negan started to trace the edges of the room with a brush and Y/N’s eyes
watched him for a long moment before following in his footsteps to do the same thing.
“Truthfully…I’ve never painted a room before so this is probably going to be…well, it’s going to
be interesting.”

“You’ve never painted a room before?” she snickered looking to Negan who seemed to be very
meticulous in how he was doing his strokes with the paintbrush. “Aren’t all men supposed to be
pretty good with that stuff?”

“I’m good with things, I’ve just never painted a room before,” Negan caught on that she was
teasing him and he shrugged his shoulders. “If you asked me to fix your car, I could do it easily. If
you wanted me to do something with my hands and fix something for you, I could probably do it.
I’m just not used to the whole home improvement thing.”

“I see,” she smiled while they continued to work. Negan had turned some music on for them to
keep it not so quiet while they worked and she found herself amused with the way that Negan
would sing to himself under his breath. It was like he didn’t want her to hear him singing, but she
actually liked it and found it cute. “You do know you can sing around me, right?”

“What?” Negan looked back at her with a smirk when she stopped working on her area of the wall.
“I wasn’t…I don’t sing.”

“Well, you should. You’re much better at singing than you are at painting,” Y/N claimed moving
across the room to Negan’s side to eye over the patches that Negan had missing. “You really are
bad at this, aren’t you?”

“You’re something else, you know that?” Negan set down his paint tray on the ladder that was
beside him. Negan turned to face her and rubbed his hands on his pants. “If you look at the other
parts I did, you can tell I’ve done a really great job, okay?”

“I think…I think maybe I need to take something from you,” she moved before him and reached
around to grasp at his back pockets making him laugh.

“What are you doing? I would think you were trying to grab my ass, but…” Negan saw her hold
her hand up like she was holding something, but there was nothing. Giving her an odd expression,
he tilted his head to the side and snorted. “What the hell are you doing?”

“I just thought I should take your man card because you are doing a horrible job,” she joked and
she heard the deep rumble of laughter that fell from Negan’s throat at her comment. “You just
weren’t meant for this kind of thing…”

“You’re a smartass,” Negan hooked his arms loosely around her shoulders. The way his eyes were
hooked on hers made her laugh and he clicked his tongue at the top of his mouth. “You’re being
really mean to me, you know?”

“I’m just intrigued with the things I’m learning,” she felt him closing the distance between them
and she found herself liking it. “Next thing you know I’m going to learn that you weren’t joking
when you told me that you were ridiculously ticklish.”

“Nah, I was only trying to be charming in the pool. It’s only in my rib area,” Negan responded to
her and her eyebrow perked up in interest. “What about you? Are you ticklish?”

“Now that’s confidential stuff. I just don’t go telling random strangers things like that,” she slurred,
tossing her head back in a sarcastic manner and Negan’s nose wrinkled in response. “Plus, that
gives you power knowing certain things and I just…”
A gasp fell from her throat when Negan pulled her firmly to him and started tickling at her sides.
Biting at her bottom lip, she did her best not to laugh, but the longer he did it she found herself
desperately trying to pull away from him, “Negan, don’t!”

“You are so fucking ticklish,” Negan snorted continuing his playful attack on her and he felt her
trying to pull herself from his grasp. The way she was laughing and giggling made him laugh as
well. It was contagious laughter and he couldn’t believe that she was as ticklish as she actually was.
“Oh, this is going to be so much fun.”

“It’s not funny,” she firmly shoved into Negan’s chest, caching him off guard. A nervous sound fell
from her throat when Negan stumbled back and ran into the ladder. When he did, the power of him
hitting the ladder caused the paint tray to drop and fall on top of his head. The white primer started
to drip down his face and head making her reach up to cover her mouth. “Oh no.”

“Wow…” Negan lifted his hands attempting to wipe the paint from his face but doing so only
made it worse. “Lesson learned. Don’t tickle you in areas where the outcome can be so much
worse for me. No sharp edges or…”

“I did not mean to do that. I am so very sorry,” she knew that she should have been mortified, but
instead she found herself laughing and Negan gave her a stern expression. When Negan’s hands
rest on his hips and the paint continued to slide down his face, she found her laughter getting much
louder. “Oh my God, you should see yourself right now…”

“It’s so funny. So very funny,” Negan grunted, his eyes rolling and he looked to his hands to see
they were still covered in paint. Stepping forward, he heard her squeal when he went to reach for
her. Attempting to make an escape, she was unsuccessful and felt Negan wrapping his arms around
her from behind. His hands reached up to press in over her face and she felt the paint covering her
cheeks. Groaning out, she managed to wiggle away from his grasp and reached up to touch her
face to feel paint over her fingertips. “It looks really good on you too.”

“While I want to be mad, you literally look like a melted ice cream cone,” she fell forward with
amusement, her hand pressing in over the center of Negan’s chest and she heard him growl in
response. “Maybe we should have hired someone to paint these walls because…”

“I can handle painting a room in my own house,” Negan grumbled with a pout, folding his arms out
in front of his chest. All it took was her eyeing him over with delight for him to know he had to
look ridiculous.

“I can see that,” she fought to contain all the jokes that she wanted to say right now. “It’s just you
might want to get the walls more than yourself if we keep doing this.”

“I should probably wash this off before it dries,” Negan interrupted her realizing that he was pretty
covered in the white primer and she nodded. Y/N did her best to not laugh as she reached for
Negan’s hand to lead him toward his room where master bathroom was. When they made it to the
bathroom, Negan stood at the door and took a look at himself in the mirror. “Fucking hell…”

“I think…” she giggled, attempting to stop herself from laughing, but she couldn’t contain it. “You
look ridiculous.”

“I do,” Negan agreed with her watching her pull open the door to his shower and turn on the water
for him. Kicking off his boots and taking his socks off, Negan walked to the shower and moved
into it with his clothes on. Stepping in underneath the water, he winced when he realized it was
cold and gave her a glare. Adjusting the dials, Negan made sure it was warm and grunted when he
thought about the mess he likely made getting here. Immediately white started to swirl in the water
at his feet and he looked up at her from where she was standing by the opened shower door. “The
least you can do is help me to make sure that I get it all…”

“Oh. Sure,” she laughed, getting her socks and shoes off before getting into the shower with him
too. They were both clothed and she found herself probably enjoying this more than she should
have been. Negan could have found her completely annoying by this point for doing what she did,
but he actually seemed kind of amused himself as well. “Let’s get this off of you…”

Reaching her hands out, she grabbed the bottom of the t-shirt he was wearing that had become
soaked and was clinging to his slender body. Unhurriedly, she pulled the material up his body and
the smile that had been over Negan’s features was replaced with a more serious expression. When
she got the material to his chest, her eyes met his stare and she shrugged.

“Arms,” she ordered and Negan lifted his arms letting her pull the material from his body.
Dropping it on the floor of the shower with a wet thud, she licked her lips and let out a nervous
sound. “Do you still want me here after I did this?”

“I do,” Negan simply answered, nodding once with his answer. Y/N reached out to brush her hands
over his face attempting to get the paint off of his face and Negan stood still, watching her. “Just
because you have a sense of humor doesn’t make me less interested in you. I knew you were a pain
in the ass when I asked you to be here.”

“Well good because being a shitty painter doesn’t make me less interested in you either,” she
winked and he half-smiled at her comment knowing that she was still fucking with him. “I think
you got more of the paint on you than you actually did on the walls.”

“This is all your work doll,” Negan chuckled, lifting his palm to caress over her cheek to try to get
some of the paint from her face. “I’m your work of art.”

“And what a work of art you are,” she responded with a sigh, her palms sliding down over his wet
chest and toward the top of the pair of shorts he was wearing. Pushing her fingers into the material,
she listened to it hit the floor of the shower in a splash at his ankles. Looking down, she could see
Negan’s black boxer briefs clinging to his body and she licked her lips. “Your parents did a great
job making you.”

“They would thank you for that,” Negan snorted, stepping closer to shorten the distance between
them. Y/N reached around Negan and grabbed a hold of the shampoo that he had. Allowing her to
lather his hair with the shampoo, Negan watched her expressions closely while she took care of
him. “Your parents did a good job with you too.”

“Oh, they would happily take all the credit for that. Except for the attitude. That’s all me,” she
winked at Negan, setting the shampoo back on the shelf. Urging Negan under the spray of water
more, she watched the white starting to leave his hair and let out a relieved breath. “Good news, I
don’t think you’re going to look like a melted ice cream cone anymore.”

“That’s…that’s good,” Negan rolled his eyes and snickered, looking down at the floor of the
shower to see the white water circling the drain. When Negan looked back up at her, the expression
he had made her swallow down hard. “I guess we’re going to have to be careful from here on out or
we’re going to waste all the paint on me.”

“Mhmm. That would be terrible,” she claimed with a teasing breath and she felt Negan reaching out
to cup her face in his rough palms. The way Negan’s thumbs stroked over the sides of her face
made her sigh and she placed her hands over Negan’s. “You’ve just learned to never tickle me
because my ninja moves come out and it gets dangerous.”
“That’s for certain,” Negan agreed with her and stepped forward in the shower. “Only pull out the
tickling when it’s absolutely necessary.”

“Which would be never,” she corrected him letting out a nervous sound when Negan lowered
down in closer to her. The warmth of his breath pressed in over her lips and she let out a shuddering
breath. “For all you know the next time there might be a window open and we’re on the second
floor and…”

“Y/N,” Negan grinned, his beautiful hazel eyes meeting her stare. “You’re nervous…”

“I would never be…” her words were cut off when she felt Negan’s lips carefully colliding with
hers. The tender caress of Negan’s mouth over hers drew her up closer to him and Negan hummed
against her lips. The subtle brush of Negan’s lips over hers drew a chill down her spine. When
Negan pulled away, his eyes were hooked on hers. Y/N was doing her best not to overreact to him
kissing her as his thumb traced over her full bottom lip. A trembling breath escaped her lips and she
found herself desperate for more. “Nervous.”

“No, never,” Negan mocked what she was saying before lowering back down to kiss her again.
The caress of his lips over hers drew her to fall forward against his chest. Her heart was pounding
and part of her wondered if she was still dreaming. Maybe she never woke up this morning, but the
longer it continued the realer she began to realize this was. The soft scratching of Negan’s short
beard against her face was something incredibly new for her. The people she had kissed in the past
didn’t have that, but it felt amazing. A sigh fell from her throat, parting her lips and Negan took
advantage of the moment, delving his tongue into her mouth. The way it softly flicked against hers
made her shake in his arms and when he pulled away, she found her legs weak. “You’re adorable.”

“You’re pretty adorable yourself,” she smirked, her eyes hooked on his while she caressed over the
roughness of his short beard. A nervous breath hitched in her throat when Negan reached for the
bottom of her shirt and tugged it teasingly up her body. Helping him get the material off, she saw
him dramatically toss it aside and she chuckled. “Even covered in white paint.”

“I know,” Negan replied, his fingertips sliding up her sides in a sensual swipe. It caused a sharp
exhale to fall from her throat and she reached out to palm in over his chest, caressing over his wet
body. “Red is probably more my color though…”

His comment drew another laugh from her and his nose wrinkled at how easily he could make her
smile. The warmth of the water was pouring down in over their bodies and Negan reached down to
untie the pants he had given her to wear. Negan’s Adam’s apple bounced in his throat while he
worked the material down her legs and helped her step out of the pants.

“You’re shaking,” Negan stammered as he pulled her body flush up against his and he could see
that her eyes were big when she looked up at him. Caressing his palms up and down her back drew
her to breathe heavier and he drew his tongue over his bottom lip. “You sure you still want to put
up with me?”

“Shouldn’t I be the one that is asking that question?” she glided her hand up his chest, up over his
collarbone and then curled her fingers around the side of his neck. Urging him in closer to her, she
watched him smirk and she shook her head. “I am the one that just got you covered in paint.”

“Yes…yes you did,” Negan slurred as she drew his lips to hers and eagerly kissed him.

At first it was slow, delicate. They were still trying to get used to each other and make sure that the
other was comfortable, but with time the kiss grew deeper. Hooking her fingers into Negan’s hair,
she purred into his mouth when he squeezed gently at her bottom. It parted her mouth again and
when Negan’s tongue brushed against hers, she returned the gesture. It felt good kissing him. This
was something that she had been desperate for since the first moment he showed interest in her.

Negan’s fingers traced up the small of her back causing her to whimper and pull her lips from his
when his fingertips grazed over the hook in her bra. Her forehead rest against his while his fingers
carefully pulled apart the hook. Y/N moved enough for Negan to help her pull the material down
her arms.

“You are so fucking beautiful,” Negan growled, his thumb teasing in over the lower part of her
breast before he dropped his head down. The warmth of Negan’s mouth drew over her collarbone,
down her chest and toward her breast. When Negan took her nipple into his mouth she whimpered
and arched her body in closer to him. With Negan’s tongue twisting around her nipple, her body
began to shake harder and she realized how far they had already come in such a short time.

“Negan,” she panted, reaching for his wet hair to tug slightly at it. A wet sound fell from his mouth
when he pulled his lips from her body and stepped forward. Negan’s eyes were heavy with lust and
his arm loosely wrapped around her waist drawing her closer to him.

Instead of saying anything more, she pulled him in to kiss her again and this time it a was a
reckless, sloppy kiss where they both were attempting to take control of the other. When Negan
pressed her firmly back against the wall of the shower, she mewled and felt his fingers hooking
into her panties to get the wet material that was clinging to her body down her legs.

“Perfect,” Negan grunted, his eyes surveying over her body. Resting his left arm against the shower
wall, Negan used his rough fingertips to trace over her body starting at her chest. Lazily, he slid
them under between the valley of her breasts. Keeping his eyes hooked on hers, he made sure to
watch how she was reacting. When he circled her nipple, her lips parted and a moan fell from her
throat. Drawing lines down her abdomen, he took notice of how her breathing got heavier when he
reached between her thighs. Palming over her most intimate parts, Negan smirked and took his time
to caress her.

“Wait,” she pled and immediately Negan drew his hand back. There was genuine worry that she
was uncomfortable in his eyes and she softly pushed into his chest. Negan was often in control of
things and for once, she wanted a turn. Carefully, she began to kiss at his chest. Peppering wet
kisses over his flesh, she felt Negan continue to caress over her body while she took her time
pampering him for once. Biting playfully at his nipple caused Negan to groan out and arch closer
to her before her hands slid in over his hips. Skimming her fingertips over the waistband of
Negan’s boxer briefs, she waited for Negan to tell her to stop, but he didn’t.

“Kiss me,” Negan reached for her neck, his thumb pressing in over the center of her neck when his
lips hammered in over hers. Kissing Negan felt exceedingly good and he knew just the right way to
kiss her to have her melting in his arms. Managing to get the material of the boxer briefs down
Negan’s hips, Negan helped her get it from his body, but continued to kiss her. Instinctively, she
attempted to drop her eyes to finally get a look at his body, but he wouldn’t let her. “Not yet.”

Negan bit at his bottom lip and reached for her hand to lead it down between them to let her wrap
her palm around his length. It made Negan’s eyes close for a moment and her touch drew a deep,
drawn out moan to fall from his throat.

“Touch it first,” Negan smirked and he felt her touch over his body unhurriedly. It was like she
was attempting to draw a picture in her head what it looked like and the delicate caress of his body
made him lean his forehead against hers. “What do you think?”

“You’re very kinky,” she licked her lips knowing that this was turning her on incredibly bad, but
she was playing along with what he wanted. The way her fingers teased over every ridge and every
vein in his manhood was clearly also very much effecting Negan as well.

“Do you still think I’m small?” Negan grunted, his nose nuzzling against the side of her neck when
she started to pump her hand over his length. Growling against the side of her neck, Negan pushed
his hips in closer to her caress and deposited soft kisses over the side of her neck.

“Not at all,” she licked her lips, feeling his cock solid within her grasp. “Can I look now?”

“Go ahead,” Negan lifted his head, licking his lips and he allowed her gaze to fall to his erection
while she continued to touch him. Negan’s thick eyebrows were furrowed while her hand worked
over him. The flexing of his jaw drew her attention to it and the sounds he was making were
ridiculously sexy. “Is it everything you pictured it to be?”

“Everything and more,” she admitted, biting at her bottom lip while Negan braced himself. “You
should have been bragging more about it.”

“Bragging is not sexy,” Negan stammered while his chest rose and fell heavily. “Plus, it doesn’t
matter if it’s big if you don’t know how to use it right.”

There was a silence that fell over them and Negan eagerly reached out to pull her in to him to kiss
her again. Kiss after kiss drew each moment to become more desperate and made them both eager
for more.

“Do you think you could handle it?” Negan bit at her bottom lip seductively and she felt her heart
hammering inside of her chest.

“With a little preparation, yeah,” she felt her throat go dry and Negan urged her hand away from
him. A loud gasp filled the air when he turned her to face the wall of the shower. His lips
descended over her shoulder while his hand reached between her thighs to caress over her body in a
firm yet determined caress. “Negan.”

Taking advantage, she reached around with her hand and palmed in over his solid length attempting
to touch him while he did the same to her. Negan’s lips pressed in over her earlobe and she felt her
body shaking. This was all turning out to be so incredible and she didn’t want to say or do anything
to ruin where this was headed.

“You are pretty fucking tight,” Negan grunted when his fingers circled over her entrance and
pushed into her. Dropping her head back against his chest, Y/N let out a whine and whimpered
when he began thrusting his fingers inside of her. “What about condoms?”

“What about them?” she licked her lips while Negan’s bit at her neck before kissing over the spot
in a tender moment.

“Are you on the pill?” Negan more bluntly responded, his bottom lip dragging up the side of her
neck and her hips started shaking while his fingers rubbed up against all of the right areas inside of
her. “Do you need me to grab a condom?”

“I’m on the pill,” she answered, her eyes slamming shut while the thrusts of his fingers continued
to get harder inside of her. “Just…just pull out before you cum.”

“You’re into that kind of thing?” Negan growled against her jaw and she shuddered at the thought.
“You trust me enough for that?”

“I do,” she panted, her palm tightening around Negan’s cock making him cry out against her flesh.
“I don’t think you’d hurt me…”

“Never,” Negan whispered pulling his fingers from her body which made her shake and she felt
Negan pressing in closer to her. The grasp of Negan’s fingers wrapping around her wrists was felt
when he urged them against the wall of the shower. Looking over her shoulder she could see
Negan looking between them as she pressed her bottom out closer to him. “Fuck…”

A whine involuntarily fell from her throat when his thick body pressed in over her bottom making
her tremble, “Negan? Can I…can I look at you?”

“Of course,” Negan released her wrists and felt her turning in his arms. Bracing his palms beside
her, Negan kept his eyes hooked on hers. It was clear that she was anxious, but Negan was waiting
for her to make her move to make sure this is what she really wanted. Y/N shakily reached out to
grab a hold of Negan’s erection, caressing over it and he tipped his head back letting out a sigh.
Swiftly, Negan grabbed a hold of her thigh and urged her to wrap her leg around his waist. “I told
you that night at the diner…if we’re going to do this, you’re going to be the one to put me inside of
you.”

Her body was shaking and she was doing her best to try and keep herself calm. Negan stood in
closer to her while she dragged the tip of his body between her folds. A whine fell from her throat
when she teased the tip of his cock against her clitoris. Negan’s eyebrows were tensed and he let
out a growl while she teased him.

“If you’re nervous, kiss me…” Negan suggested, licking his lips while he could see her chest
rising and falling heavily. Taking him up on his offer, she dragged his body over her wet slit a few
times while he drew kiss after desperate kiss from her lips. The sound of the doorbell ringing made
Negan pull away from her mouth and his face twisted with confusion. “Fuck…fuck…”

“Negan…” she frowned when he set her leg back down and urged her to release his body. “What’s
wrong?”

“This was a mistake,” Negan grunted, brushing his wet hair back leaving her standing breathless
against the side of the shower wall. Y/N was trembling realizing how close they were to actually
having sex and she was trying to catch her breath. Negan moved back under the spray of water to
get himself completely cleaned off. “We should have never let it get that far…”

“Negan,” she frowned hearing him cuss to himself over and over again. Letting out a frustrated
sound, she quickly moved out of the shower and reached for the towel that was hanging at the back
of the door. With how upset Negan was about the two of them almost sleeping together, she found
herself hurt. Going into Negan’s drawers where he had grabbed some things for her previously, she
found a pair of sweatpants and a graphic t-shirt to put on. Gathering her things, she could still hear
Negan in the shower, but headed for the door. Pulling it open she let out a gasp when she saw a
little girl standing before her and the blonde gave Y/N a once over. “Who are you?”

“Who are you?” the little girl laughed and Y/N tilted her head to the side. “Better question is…
where the hell is Negan?”

“You’re looking for Negan?” Y/N confirmed and the little girl nodded, holding the bags she had in
her hands more firmly.

“Sam?” Negan’s voice filled the hallway and Y/N looked back to see Negan walking out of his
bedroom with a pair of athletic pants on while holding a white t-shirt in his hand. When the little
girl leaned forward to see Negan, a big smile expanded over Negan’s features. Quickly, he put on
the t-shirt and waved his hands in the air motioning the girl into his home. The little girl dropped
her bags and ran into the house where Negan excitedly picked her up in his arms and gave her a big
hug. “What are you doing here?”

“It’s our weekend together,” the little girl muttered and Y/N felt the room spinning around her.
Negan’s head tilted to the side. “Are you really getting that old that you forgot it? Mom said you
already knew.”

“Mom?” Y/N repeated her words looking at how close the two of them seemed to be. “Negan, is
this your daughter?”

“Negan is this your new girlfriend?” the little girl stammered, a smile pressing in over her young
features as she clung tightly to Negan’s neck. Sam’s bright green eyes met Y/N’s and Y/N clung
tightly to the door. “If she is, I think you need to start filling her in on a few things.”

“Well…” Negan muttered, his eyes nervously looking between Sam and Y/N. “I don’t, know if I
would say she’s my girlfriend, but…we’re…in…a relationship? Kind of.”

“How old are you?” Sam looked to Y/N catching the expression that Y/N gave her. “She’s a little
young for you, isn’t she?”

“I’m not that young,” Y/N stood up for herself and heard Sam laugh. “How old are you?”

“I’m twelve,” Sam answered with a sigh as Negan finally set Sam back down on the ground. “If
you’re in a relationship, doesn’t that mean you’re dating each other? Which means…she’s your
girlfriend.”

“In a way, kind of,” Negan answered and Y/N gave Negan a confused expression. Sure, it was
better to say she was his girlfriend than it was to get into the complicated way their relationship
actually was.

“Okay, so what are we doing today with your girlfriend?” Sam went for her bags, carrying them
into Negan’s house and setting them down on the floor.

“Well, I think Y/N was about to leave,” Negan acknowledged knowing that Y/N was angry with
him for what he had just said in the shower. “We were painting a room before you got here
though.”

“Okay, that sounds fun. Which room?” Sam rubbed her hands together, clearly ready to start
helping them with whatever project they were working on. Y/N was still trying to determine if the
little girl that was now in Negan’s home was his or not. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

“I’m just trying to figure out if you’re Negan’s daughter or not,” Y/N was honest, folding her arms
out in front of her chest while she let out a hesitant breath.

“Would it bother you if she was my daughter?” Negan grunted, his eyebrows tensing when he
stepped forward. “Because it sounds like it would bother you if Sam was my daughter.”

“Did I miss something here?” Sam spoke up and Negan lifted his finger up to his lips as if hinting
to Sam to stay quiet. “Are you two fighting? Oh man, this is intense. Kind of like those soap
operas.”

“Sam,” Negan hushed her, noticing the way her green eyes got big and she nodded. It was clear
Sam was trying to hold back a smile while she looked between Negan and Y/N. “So…?”

“So what?” Y/N repeated Negan’s words and he let out a tense laugh.
“I’m asking you if it would bother you,” Negan repeated his question, throwing his hands up in the
air as he spoke. “Would it affect our relationship if you found out that Sam was my daughter? It’s
kind of a big deal to know if that kind of thing would bother you or not. So, I think I at least
deserve the answer to that.”
 Chapter 5
Chapter Summary

Negan pressures Y/N after thinking she may not be okay with the idea of him having a
daughter. The truth about Sam is revealed and Y/N gets to see a side of Negan she had
never really seen before.

Chapter Notes

Sorry this took so long to post!

“Of course I don’t have a problem with you having a daughter. I just thought maybe that would be
something that you would have told me ahead of time,” Y/N answered while Negan stared out at
her expectantly waiting for her answer after the arrival of Sam. It seemed like a lot of their
relationship would depend on her answer by the look on his face. The idea that she may be upset
by him having a daughter really seemed to offend Negan. Maybe she came off aggressive about
him having a daughter, but deep down it didn’t bother her at all. That would have been something
silly for her to be upset about. It was just something she figured Negan would have told her. Then
again, they weren’t really dating so he owed her nothing in terms of an explanation. “If I would
have known your daughter was coming over, I would have made sure we weren’t in the middle of
painting a room.”

“Two things,” Sam stepped forward from where she was standing behind Negan to make her
presence known once more. “One, I think painting rooms are awesome. My mom paints the rooms
in our house all the time and I always help. So, I don’t mind. It’s cooler than just sitting around and
doing nothing. It gives us time to get to know each other. Work together. There is nothing wrong
with that.”

“You want to get to know me?” Y/N stammered, her head tilting to the side as Sam giggled and
pulled her long, blonde hair back.

“Of course I do. If you are his girlfriend, why wouldn’t I?” Sam muttered, her brow line creasing
much as Y/N had seen Negan’s do before making her wonder even more if Sam was Negan’s
daughter. “If you’re important to Negan, you’re important to me.”

“Well, that’s very sweet,” Y/N looked between Sam and Negan noticing the way that Negan was
staring down at Sam while she spoke.

“Well, I want Negan happy. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen him happy,” Sam reached out to
poke Negan in the abdomen making Negan chuckle when she did it. “But I never got to my part
two and part two is…I’m not his daughter.”

“Sam,” Negan snorted and Sam threw her hands up in the air. Obviously, Negan wasn’t going to
drop that last bit of information until he knew that Y/N wouldn’t have a problem with him being a
father.
“Being honest is the best thing you can do in a relationship,” Sam reminded Negan making Negan
let out a hearty laugh at her advice. “Of course, he’s always been like a father to me, but he’s my
uncle. Well…he’s kind of my uncle.”

“Sam, I’ve been around since you were born. I’m your uncle,” Negan grumbled and Sam smiled
brightly, turning to look to Y/N again. Negan reached out to wrap his arm loosely around Sam’s
shoulders before pulling her in closer to him. “Sam is Lucille’s sister’s daughter.”

“And I’m also his goddaughter. My mom and Negan here were pretty good friends. Well one of
my moms thinks he’s great. The other one…” Sam looked up at Negan and chuckled when Negan
hushed her.

“Moms?” Y/N repeated what Sam said and saw Sam proudly nod her head.

“Yeah, I have two moms. So, I guess you could say that Negan was the closest thing to a father
I’ve had my whole life,” Sam muttered and laughed when Negan picked her up in his arms to pull
her close to his chest. Planting a kiss on Sam’s cheek caused her to groan out making Negan laugh
again when she did it. The interaction between the two of them made Y/N laugh and Negan
smirked when he noticed Y/N was amused with them. “One of my moms is a doctor. She’s the one
that was Aunt Lucille’s sister. My other mom travels for business. When my mom travels for
business she always has me come over and be with Negan. Even when they aren’t traveling, they
let me spend at least one weekend a month with Negan. Plus, I like hanging out with him. He’s a
great uncle. We do a lot of fun things and he’s a really great guy.”

“How much do I owe you for talking good about me like that?” Negan teased, squeezing Sam
close to him.

“I’ll take a twenty please,” Sam held her hand up and Negan chuckled as he set her down back to
her feet. Negan pulled his wallet out of his pocket and pulled out a twenty-dollar bill for her. Sam
pocketed the money and laughed making Y/N entertained when they did it. “Were you two in the
pool together? Since you’re both wet.”

“Yeah, we were in the middle of painting and I just got hot,” Negan lied, looking back at Y/N
knowing that they needed to talk, but it would be hard for them to do that with Sam there. “Why
don’t you head to the room and pick out the brush you want to use to paint. I’ll be right in there.”

“Is Y/N coming?” Sam inquired and Negan shrugged his shoulders. That wasn’t an answer he
could give Sam because he didn’t know what kind of mindset that Y/N was in. Or if she’d even
want to be around him. “Well, it would be cool to get to know her if she was staying. Either way, it
was nice to meet you Y/N…in case you’re leaving.”

“It was very nice to meet you too Sam,” Y/N gave a wink and watched Sam wave before heading
down the hallway. When Sam was gone, Negan turned to Y/N with one of his eyebrows arched.
They both were quiet until they knew for sure that they were alone. “I should probably allow you
to spend time with your niece. Having me around makes things complicated.”

“It really doesn’t. I would rather you stay here,” Negan insisted her with a heavy sigh, folding his
arms out in front of his chest.

“You once again said what we did was a mistake,” she reminded him and Negan frowned as he
shifted his weight. There was a silence between them as Negan searched for the right thing to say
to her. “Why are you so against being with me?”

“I’ve already told you the answer to that. I just feel bad because we had our first kiss and I just let
things get out of hand,” Negan responded with a frown, lifting his right hand up to pinch at the
bridge of his nose. “I don’t regret kissing you; I just regret pushing you into what followed.”

“You didn’t push me into anything,” she denied that idea and Negan tilted his head to the side, not
believing what she was saying. “You didn’t.”

“You were nervous. I was pushing too much and too fast,” Negan stepped forward, his hand
sliding in over her hip and she let out a tense breath. “I don’t regret having you around here. I don’t
regret kissing you…”

“That’s not the way it seemed,” she went to bicker with him as he dipped down to collect her lips
in a kiss. The kiss was slow, meticulous and absolutely took her breath away. With the way Negan
caressed over the small of her back while kissing her felt amazing. Chills went down her spine and
when Negan pulled away from her, she could feel her body trembling.

“I want things to be perfect with you,” Negan asserted, his face scrunching up as he thought about
what they did. “You deserve perfect. We went from kissing to…”

Negan looked over his shoulder to make sure they were alone, but Y/N reached out to draw him to
look back to her knowing they were alone. Tipping up on her toes, she met him in another
desperate kiss hearing him hum when she did it. Instead of being uptight, they both loosened up
while their kiss continued and she could feel Negan possessively grasping at the side of her neck.

“Whoever painted the right side of the wall…” Sam moved out into the hallway making both Y/N
and Negan hop back from each other. When Sam saw the two of them, she snorted and shook her
head slowly. “Never mind, I’ll talk to you when you guys are…finished.”

“Nice Sam,” Negan looked back at his niece seeing the way she shrugged her shoulders before
heading back into the room. When Sam was gone, Negan turned to look at Y/N and he sighed
heavily. “I told you when people…get with me…things just fall apart and I don’t want that
between us.”

“I wouldn’t let that happen Negan,” she tried to assure him, looking down toward the ground. The
soft stroking of Negan’s fingertips was felt against the side of her face. It caused a shuddering
breath to fall from her throat and she lifted her gaze. “We do have a deal after all.”

“Yeah, I guess we do,” Negan acknowledged, lowering his hand when she clearly brought up the
fact that they weren’t exactly official to begin with. There was a sense of disappointment in his
eyes, but he shrugged his shoulders and tried to brush that feeling away. “It’s your choice. You can
stay and get to know my niece if you want. Or you can go and we can get together again at some
point. I would prefer you stay.”

“And that’s what you want?” Y/N confirmed and Negan nodded his head. “That’s not going to
make this feel odd? Since I’m not really your girlfriend and she thinks that I am.”

“You’re the closest thing to a girlfriend I’ve had since Lucille,” Negan reasoned with her, throwing
his hands up in the air in a dramatic manner. “Let’s be honest, our relationship isn’t…conventional,
but it’s a relationship none the less.”

“Are you sure it’s okay if I stay?” she confirmed seeing Negan seem to perk up when she thought
about staying with them. “I don’t want your niece to hate me.”

“She won’t,” Negan replied with a firm shake of his head. “I would really rather you two get to
know each other. Sam is a good kid. A little spicy, but she usually likes everyone unless they give
her a reason not to. I know you; you’re not someone she wouldn’t like. You two I think would get
along quite well.”

“And you want me here?” by now she probably sounded like a broken record and she knew it. The
crack of a smile that pressed in over his lips made her realize she had asked that one too many
times. There was something about those dimples of his that just made her weak in the knees as he
smiled at her nervousness. All he had to do was smile and it made it feel like everything was right
in the world. That’s the kind of charm he had.

“How many times do I have to say yes before you realize that I sincerely want you here?” Negan
stepped forward to wrap his arm around her waist to draw her in closer to him. “If my niece makes
you uncomfortable, you can leave. She’s going to be here today and tomorrow. You’re welcome to
stay. But I understand if you would like to leave. The choice is yours.”

Negan stepped back and waited for her decision. When she continued to stand in the foyer and
didn’t make a move to leave, he took that as her answer. Reaching out his hand for her, she
accepted it and moved back toward the room with him to work on the room again. When they
entered the room he was painting for her, the music playlist that Sam had picked was blasting
while she worked on the walls.

“Damn you’re a fast cookie,” Negan released Y/N’s hand slowly as he took a look at what Sam had
done already. Sam looked back at them to see Y/N was still there and a smile expanded over Sam’s
features.

“Hey! You stayed,” Sam winked before going back to work on helping to get the primer on the
walls. “I’m glad you stayed, that way we can gossip about Negan.”

“Hey now,” Negan reached for the paint roller that he had set aside and he waved on Y/N to have
her come in closer with them. Negan moved in beside Sam to wrap his arm around her shoulders to
give her a firm squeeze. “No gossiping about Negan during this time period please. We’re just
going to work together on these walls and keep our mouths shuts.”

“Well that’s boring shit then,” Sam snorted making Negan laugh when she said it and it made Y/N
crack a smile. Sam definitely took after he uncle. That was for sure. “We’re going to talk about
things whether you like it or not. Sitting in silence is not fun.”

Sam poked Negan in the side before grabbing his roller. Setting the roller in a paint tray, she
handed it to Negan and nodded toward the other side of the room, “Y/N and I will work together.
You can go work to yourself over there.”

“My own niece is kicking me out?” Negan placed his hand in over the center of his chest to feign
being hurt. The way Sam laughed drew attention to her dimples and it made Y/N chuckle herself at
how giggly the two of them were together. “I feel cheated.”

“It’s okay. We’re probably going to have to fix your side anyways,” Sam shoved into Negan to get
him to go away toward the other side of the room. When Negan went to his area of the room, Sam
urged Y/N to start working with her. “So…how long have you known Negan?”

“Uh…” Y/N looked back at Negan who was eyeing her over while looking over his shoulder
working on the other side of the room. There was an expression on Negan’s face that showed her
he didn’t really know what the answer for that should have been either. “Not for very long.”

“I see,” Sam worked on her side of the wall and Y/N did her side. Y/N was honest with Sam.
Honesty was the best like Sam had said earlier. After a minute, Sam cleared her throat and looked
to Y/N with her big, green eyes. “So what are your intentions with him?”

“Sam!” Negan snorted from where he was and Sam threw her hands up in the air defensively,
holding the paintbrush haphazardly while it dripped on the drop cloth beneath them. “I would
actually not like to scare this one off, okay? Questions like that so early in a relationship…not
cool.”

“This one? You act like you’ve had multiple women around,” Sam retorted with a wrinkle of her
nose before going back to working. An embarrassed expression flushed over Negan’s features
when his eyes connected with Y/N’s. It may have embarrassed Negan, but Y/N actually found it
kind of cute that Sam would ask that. It meant she cared about her uncle. There was nothing wrong
with that. “I’m sorry if I upset you. You’re just the first girl that my uncle has been around since
my aunt died and I just want to make sure you want what’s best for him.”

“I very much like your uncle,” Y/N took a moment to speak, but when she gathered her thoughts
she assured Sam of how she felt. “I know about your Aunt Lucille and I really like spending time
with your uncle. He’s unique and he treats me really well. Better than a lot of people have my
entire life.”

“Yeah, that sounds like him,” Sam stammered with a sigh making Negan chuckle in the
background behind them. “He’s really good to me too. Has always treated me like I was his own
child. Buys me things. Pampers me. He really likes animals. Did you know that? Every few weeks
we go and volunteer at a shelter. He really loves dogs, but my Aunt Lucille was allergic so he
never got one. I hope you can convince him to get one soon. It’d be nice to have a dog to play with
when I come here.”

“I’ll have to see what I can do,” Y/N smirked as Negan let out a sigh.

“What she hasn’t told you is that she keeps asking her moms for a dog and they keep telling her no,
so she wants me to get her one and pretend it’s mine,” Negan informed Y/N with a snort and he
watched Sam look over her shoulder to stick her tongue out at him. Returning the gesture, Negan
stuck his tongue out at her as well making Y/N laugh at their silliness. “Which in reality, I’ll be the
one training it, living with it, feeding it, taking care of it…all of that fun stuff. So it will be my
dog.”

“Dogs make you happy Negan,” Sam insisted moving closer to the middle of the wall so she could
work on the lower parts while Y/N worked on the higher parts of the wall. “I’m sure having Y/N
here makes you happy, but imagine how happy you will be if you have a dog here too. A new
girlfriend and a new dog? That sounds like the ultimate happiness to me.”

“That sounds like exhaustion to me,” Negan teased as he finished up with the wall he was working
on and moved to the next part. “What am I going to do with the poor puppy when you’re at school
and I’m at work? He or she will be all alone to themself.”

“What does Y/N do? Could she watch it?” Sam looked to Y/N with big eyes and Y/N glanced over
at Negan. Multiple times already, she had looked to Negan for some kind of answer, but he seemed
just as blank as her as to what to say to his niece.

“If the time ever comes where it feels right and your uncle wanted to get a puppy, then I would
have no problem babysitting it,” Y/N answered knowing that she could have left it at that, but she
didn’t want to leave Negan in the hole where Sam was expecting him to immediately get one. “I
think because the bond you want to have with a puppy, your uncle might want to wait until
something like summer time so that way him and the puppy could have time together. Only have
two days a week with work with the puppy might be hard on both Negan and the puppy with
separation anxiety.”

“When you put it like that…” Sam spoke in a slow slur before shrugging her shoulders, “I guess
that kind of makes sense.”

They finished with the primer and talked about random odds and ends before following Negan into
the kitchen for some dinner while they waited for the primer to dry so they could actually paint the
color in the room that they had been working on. While they sat at the island in Negan’s kitchen,
Y/N could see that Sam’s eyes were hooked on her curiously.

“You’re very pretty,” Sam complimented Y/N and Y/N couldn’t help at smile over how sweet
Negan’s niece had turned out to be.

“And you’re very pretty too,” Y/N repeated and Negan looked back at the two of them as he put
something together for them to eat. Negan gave a wink and Y/N was actually thankful she stayed.
Getting to see Negan interact with his niece was nice because it showed a side to him that she
didn’t even know existed before.

“You and Negan make a good looking couple. I think my Aunt Lucille would have liked you,”
Sam assured Y/N with a happy sound as Negan set Sam’s plate of food before her. “You lucked out
with Negan. He’s a good cook.”

“She lucked out with Negan?” Negan reiterated her words with a chuckle. The look Sam gave him
made it seem like she didn’t think it was a big deal. That just wasn’t something Negan was used to
hearing Sam say. Stepping back toward the counters, Negan grabbed the plate of food he made for
Y/N and moved to the island to carefully reach out to hand it to her. “Where the hell did you hear
something like that?”

“I heard mom saying it the other day about something. I figure it means something good, right?”
Sam inquired, pushing her blonde hair back into a ponytail again before she started to eat dinner.

“No, you used it perfectly right in a sentence, I just don’t expect to hear that from a twelve year
old,” Negan grunted with a half laugh, his face scrunching up when he repeated the saying once
more. “But apparently you lucked out with me Y/N. I can in fact cook and I cook well.”

“He does a lot of things well. My Uncle Negan isn’t like most people and I mean that in a good
way. He can fix cars, he can fix things around the house, he’s really funny…” Sam continued to
ramble on; her eyes hooked on Y/N as Negan took a seat next to Sam and started laughing.
“What?”

“You do realize she is already dating me, right?” Negan pointed out making Y/N smirk as she took
the first bite of the food that Negan had put together for them. Sam was right; he was exceedingly
good at cooking. Maybe she would have to spend more time with Negan because she could just tell
by this meal that he prepared that he already made food better than her family.

“I just think she would like to know that the guy she is dating has all those qualities. Sure, he isn’t
great at painting, but he’s awesome with kids,” Sam continued on making Negan throw his hand up
in the air to cover his eyes and laugh as if he was embarrassed. “That’s marriage material right?”

“Marriage material?” Y/N repeated Sam’s words and Negan dragged his hand down his face
letting out an uncomfortable laugh. “I think it’s a little early in the relationship to be talking about
marriage, but I do agree with you he is a special guy.”

“It’s never too early to talk about marriage, is it?” Sam reasoned making both Negan and Y/N
laugh with her over dramatic tone. “I mean look at my parents. They knew each other three months
and then they got married because they knew they were the right ones for each other.”

“Not everyone is like your parents though. What they had is special,” Negan claimed, pushing at
the food on his plate with his fork. “Sometimes what took your parents three months to do takes
people ten years to do. Sometimes you just have to be really sure that’s what you want.”

“But you and Lucille got married at nineteen,” Sam bickered with Negan and Negan cleared his
throat uneasily when Sam dropped that little bit of information.

“Nineteen?” Y/N stammered and Negan looked to Y/N with a tilt of his head. The way his
eyebrows furrowed made it seem like once more she needed to tread carefully with how she
responded to that information. When they had talks about Negan being a ladies man in the past, she
really didn’t expect him to be the kind of guy that was married at nineteen. That meant if she took
after him, she would have been married for a few years now. “You were married at nineteen?”

“I was,” Negan nodded, glancing down at his wedding ring that he had on his hand. He spun it on
his finger before shifting uncomfortably in his chair. The way his neck tensed drew attentions to
the large vein in his neck and Y/N could sense that Negan wasn’t exactly thrilled that Sam had
dropped that bit of information. “Things kind of came fast for me when I was young. I did really
well at baseball. I looked like I had a great career ahead of me. Then I got hurt when I was nineteen
and special events led to me being married.”

“She didn’t know that bit?” Sam winced when she realized that she dropped new information on
Y/N about Negan’s past. “I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s okay. She should know things. You were right about the whole honesty thing Sam,”
Negan stammered taking a bite of his dinner. “Lucille was pregnant when we got married.”

Y/N choked when Negan admitted that and Negan’s eyes narrowed while he stared out at her.
Negan took a big bite of his food and craned his neck a bit, clearly uncomfortable, “Lucille had a
miscarriage and after that was never able to have kids again. But I don’t regret marrying her at that
age. Like Sam said, when you know you love someone…you know.”

“I am so sorry,” Y/N apologized feeling suddenly guilty that she had made things so stressful
earlier about Negan having a child. Sam reached out to place her hand over Negan’s and she gave it
a firm squeeze. “Negan…”

“We’re good,” Negan wrapped his fingers around Sam’s fingers and gave them a tiny squeeze in
return. “We always talked about adopting, but that never really…went through.”

“What was nice though is that with Uncle Negan and Aunt Lucille it was like I had two sets of
parents growing up,” Sam informed Y/N with a bright smile reaching out to wrap her arm around
Negan’s shoulders and he grinned. “I was always with Aunt Lucille and Uncle Negan. Almost as
much as I was with my moms. I very much liked it.”

“Were you…” Y/N paused, her eyebrows furrowing when she thought about her question she was
about to ask. Curiosity was getting the best of Y/N, especially knowing that Sam had two mothers.
In some cases, this question could be considered rude, but Negan and Sam seemed to be quite open
to their lives. “Were you adopted Sam?”

“No, it’s kind of complicated. My parents explained it to me, but my biological mother is my Aunt
Lucille’s sister,” Sam waved her hand around in the air, shrugging her shoulders when she
continued to eat her food. “I don’t know who my dad was. They had a donor or something. I never
understood it. It kind of creeped me out when they tried to explain it.”

“Your mother would kill me if she knew we were talking about this,” Negan stammered with a
groan and Sam giggled. “Lucille’s sister is Elaina and Sam’s other mom is Jane. Elaina is very
open about things where as Jane…”

“Let’s just say they are complete opposites. One thinks I should know how babies are really made
and the other got very angry when I found out how they were made,” Sam made a disgusted face
and Negan’s nose wrinkled when he listed to his niece ramble. “My mothers are so different it’s
weird.”

“Elaina likes me and Jane…not my biggest fan,” Negan took another mouthful of food and lifted
his eyes to see Y/N listening carefully to them.

“She loves you. She just doesn’t get your humor. She’s kind of…lame. But I love her!” Sam
explained while poking at her food.

“It sounds like you guys have a really good family there,” Y/N pointed out as she continued to eat
her food and Sam’s eyes were still hooked on hers. It was nice hearing the two of them go back and
forth with one another. There was no doubt by the way they could talk with each other that Negan
and Sam were close.

“I think you would make a perfect addition to it,” Sam gave a cheesy smile and Negan dropped his
fork to the plate making Sam giggle again.

“You might as well be proposing for me at this point. Do you want to go to the store with me and
pick out a ring?” Negan reached out to tickle at Sam’s sides and strangely enough, Y/N really liked
this.

“At least it would be a pretty ring. I have taste,” Sam firmly stated between her laughter while she
continued to try and fight off Negan from his tickling.

Domestic life was not something that Y/N had ever seen herself enjoying or wanting. More than
anything she thought wanted a good job and she wanted to be fiercely independent because of how
her parents had been toward her. Yet Y/N enjoyed the time she was spending with Negan and Sam.
Their bickering was incredibly cute and charming. With her family she never really got to see the
good side of having a family, so this perspective of what a family should be was really eye opening
for Y/N.

When Negan stopped tickling Sam, he looked up at Y/N with slightly rose colored cheeks. “I’m
sorry; I have a bit of a pushy one here Y/N.”

“You’re fine. I think Sam is great,” Y/N gave Sam a wink and Sam tickled Negan back for revenge
when his attention was fully on Y/N. Watching them play with each other made her happy. Their
laughter was contagious and even though Negan had opened up about things that were kind of dark,
Sam was there to balance it out and make it better for him. Which was a good thing and Y/N was
glad to have that moment.

After dinner, Y/N was helping Negan clean up the dishes. Sam was eager to get back to painting in
the other room and left them to clean up. Negan insisted that he had no problem cleaning
everything up, but Y/N didn’t want to leave it all on him, especially since he had been kind enough
to make them such a nice meal. There was a silence between them as she looked over at him with a
sad expression. After watching him with Sam, she started to think about how angry she had been at
him over the last few days. It made her regret the way she was acting and spending this time with
Negan made her rethink the way she was about things previously.

“I’m sorry I’ve given you so much shit. You have been through so much and I don’t think I
realized that,” Y/N explained how she was feeling and Negan’s gaze lifted from the plates that he
was cleaning up in the soapy water.

“Please don’t apologize,” Negan looked to her with a frown and he shrugged. “You had no idea
what I’ve been through. How were you supposed to? Plus, I could have been more open with you.
There are a lot of things I think…might be hard for me to tell people. Still. What you know now is
only scratching the surface. Not sure anyone would want to be around me if they knew
everything.”

“I highly doubt that,” she reached out to squeeze over his shoulder and there was a sense of sadness
in his expression.

“I really fucked this up didn’t I?” Negan snorted as he looked away from her with an
uncomfortable shift of his body. “This is exceedingly strange and way too much when you were
just looking for a sugar daddy, isn’t it?”

“Nah, you’re still my sugar daddy, but I think we’re a little bit more complicated than that now,”
she teased, bumping him softly with her hip. They could have talked more about that, but
considering Sam was in the other room, she didn’t think now was really the time. “Sam is really
amazing you know.”

“I told you that you would like her. She’s pushy, but…” Negan went to continue and Y/N reached
for Negan’s shirt to pull him to her so they could kiss. A surprised sound fell from Negan’s throat
as she kissed him over and over again. Licking his lips when she pulled away, Negan let out a long
exhale and smiled. “Well that was nice.”

“Sexy sugar daddy Negan is nice, but this side of you,” she took a moment to eye him over and she
palmed in over the center of his chest, “This makes you so much sexier.”

A grin tugged at the corners of his lips. His eyes were hooked on hers when she started to back
step away from the sink.

“Finish up drying and I’ll see you in there,” Y/N whispered moving toward the hallway to go back
to helping Sam with the painting. Leaving Negan in the kitchen, she just wanted him to know that
she liked what she had seen of him. Having him be a mystery was appealing, but seeing how
amazing he was in general was even better.

After they finished painting late into the night, Y/N had helped Negan and Sam build a ‘fort’ in
Negan’s living room out of blankets, sheets and cushions from the couch and chairs. It reminded
her so much of being young. She missed the innocence and fun that came with being Sam’s age.

When the fort was done they had pulled some sleeping bags and blankets into it. All three of them
easily fit in underneath it and they were all lying together. Negan was in the middle and the area
was lit by a flashlight that Sam was holding onto. Negan and Sam were making shadow puppets
giggling with each other whenever Negan would do something ridiculous. When they calmed
down and seemed to be winding down, Sam let out a heavy sigh and looked over to them, “Today
was fun. I’m excited for whatever we’re going to do tomorrow. You’re staying tomorrow, right
Y/N?”

“Of course I am,” Y/N assured Sam as Sam cuddled into Negan for a while. Feeling her phone
buzzing in her pocket, Y/N cleared her throat and pulled out her phone to see she had a lot of
missed calls from her parents. She hadn’t been in contact with them since she had been with Negan
so they were likely wondering where she was.

“You should let them know that you are okay,” Negan whispered, looking down at his chest to see
that Sam had fallen asleep on the center of his chest. “Parents just like to know you’re okay. No
matter how fucking awful of a parent they may be.”

“You’re right,” she agreed sending a text to her mother that she was just staying with a friend for a
few days. Negan gave her a wink when she turned off her phone and got comfortable beside him.

Negan turned the flashlight off while Sam was and they had all fallen asleep for a while. In the
middle of the night, a gasp fell from Y/N’s throat when she felt a weight shifting over her. Opening
her eyes, she saw Negan crawling in over her, bracing himself on his elbows. Negan placed his
finger in over his mouth to keep her silent as he nodded over toward a sleeping Sam.

“You are so fucking perfect,” Negan slurred, his eyes hooded while he looked her over. Lowering
in, he pressed a teasing, faint kiss over her lips before starting to pepper kisses over her lips. Each
kiss would get just a bit harder and a bit more intense. Soon her arms were hooked around Negan’s
shoulders while they were essentially making out. A moan fell from Negan’s throat when he felt
Y/N sucking at his tongue and he lazily pulled his mouth away from hers. “I think I need to go
back to bed. We have to keep this PG-thirteen.”

“God,” she laughed against his mouth as he gave her a final kiss goodnight before rolling back to
his spot. Taking advantage of the moment, she slid in beside him and urged him to wrap his arm
around her. Cuddling up to Negan felt amazing and made her feel safe. Even if they were sleeping
on the floor, this was the most comfortable she had been sleeping at night being with Negan the
last two days.

By the time she woke up in the morning it was because she heard the sound of pans clanking
together and she lifted up to see that she was alone in the fort that they had built the night before.
Crawling out carefully making sure she didn’t destroy anything, she could hear Negan and Sam
talking together in the kitchen. Their giggles made her smile when she reached the entrance of the
kitchen to see them together cooking breakfast.

“Good morning,” she finally spoke up and both of them looked over their shoulders at her.
“Something smells good.”

“Morning,” Negan winked and then went back to cooking. Sam waved excitedly while her other
hand clung to the spatula she had. “We didn’t want to wake you until breakfast was done because
you seemed really comfortable.”

“I guess I needed the sleep,” she admitted, taking a look at what time it was, “How far away is
breakfast? I should probably go grab some clothes and a quick shower so you both can stand to be
around me.”

“You’ve got time,” Negan gave her a nod, but Sam gave her a weird expression. “She lives across
the street.”

“Oh!” Sam nodded, looking toward what they were cooking. “We just started so you should be
fine.”

“Bring your bathing suit, this one wants to go swimming after breakfast,” Negan informed her,
looking over his shoulder again at Y/N with a smirk.
“And then tonight we’re going to a fair that’s happening in town. I heard about it and wanted my
moms to take me, but they never had the time so Negan is going to take us,” Sam informed her
with a happy smile, “So that should be really fun, but you need to be comfortable so we can walk
around.”

“Got it. Good walking shoes and a bathing suit,” Y/N snapped her fingers, nodding her head. She
wondered if she should have been giving Negan and Sam some alone time together, but they both
seemed to want her around.

Heading back to her house, she knew that her parents wouldn’t be there so she quickly snuck in and
grabbed what she needed. She got in a quick shower before rushing back to Negan’s to have
breakfast with them. When they got into the pool, Negan had set up a net for them to play
volleyball and Sam had requested Y/N to be on her team.

“I don’t think this is really fair, the whole two on one thing,” Negan prepared to serve the ball
while they were in the pool together. His big smile expanded over his handsome features,
enhancing his dimples when he did it. There was definitely a happiness to Negan when Sam had
been with them that she hadn’t seen before. He just lit up around her and Y/N liked to see it.

“It’s not like we’re taking much away from you Negan, you suck for the most part so it wouldn’t
have helped who was on your team,” Sam teased Negan and stuck her tongue out making Negan
snort before serving the ball. Sam managed to bump it back over the net and Negan easily hit it
back to them, but Y/N was able to spike it back to Negan. He attempted to jump to catch it, but
ended up missing it letting out a frustrated sound. “We’re kicking your ass.”

“Butt,” Negan chuckled holding his finger out to point out at Sam, “If your mom hears you saying
that, she’s going to kick my ass.”

“I know, I know,” Sam rolled her eyes and held her hand up to motion him to calm down. “I know
to only talk like that around you.”

“I think we should play something else,” Negan swam under the net and moved in closer to them.
“I’m going to continue to get my ass kicked and I feel like we should play a game where I actually
stand a shot.”

“Watch your mouth,” Y/N muttered, playfully elbowing Negan hearing him chuckle when she said
that after he corrected Sam on the word ass. “What do you have in mind?”

“How about Marco Polo?” Negan suggested and he saw Sam’s face scrunch up before shrugging
her shoulders. “You can be it first since you were the MVP of the last round.”

“Shouldn’t the loser be the first person to be it?” Sam pointed out and Negan threw his hands up in
the air while shaking his head.

“I think I should be given a break after how badly I was losing,” Negan smirked and nodded
toward the steps. “You know the rules. Go over there, close your eyes.”

“I know the rules of Marco Polo,” Sam grumbled, swimming over to the steps of the pool and she
turned away from them. Sam started to count out loud and Negan reached for Y/N’s hand to pull
her with him toward the corner of the opposite end of the pool.

Pulling her in front of him, Negan kept his arms loosely wrapped around her waist and nuzzled his
nose against the back of her neck, “When she starts, you stay to the edge of the pool and go that
way. I’ll go this way and go to the stairs. Then follow my lead.”
“Okay,” she snickered with Negan whispering against her flesh. The sensation of him pressing a
tender kiss against the back of her neck made her eyes close for a moment before hearing Sam
announce she was going to start looking for them.

When Sam started swimming out, Negan urged Y/N to move like he had said and Sam’s voice
filled the air, “Marco.”

“Polo,” both of them muttered in return and because they were separated, Sam seemed to stand still
for a moment to try to determine where to go. When Sam repeated Marco, they both responded
once they reached the stairs. Negan urged Y/N to carefully move out of the pool and she gave him
a look that made him shrug his shoulders.

“Move around the pool and keep responding,” Negan ordered in a quiet tone as they both moved
around the edge of the pool. For a while it worked, but eventually Sam picked up on what they had
done. Sam pulled herself out of the pool and chased after Negan making him laugh when she
managed to push him into the pool. “Hey, why did I get shoved? Y/N did it too.”

“Because I know it was your idea, you jerk,” Sam laughed, jumping back in the water to splash
Negan when she returned to the water.

Sitting on the edge of the pool, Y/N watched Negan and Sam play wrestle together before Negan
looked to Y/N with big eyes. When Sam went to swim, Negan moved to the edge and slid his hand
up Y/N’s leg, “What are you thinking?”

“How much I like you,” Y/N answered, reaching out to trace over the side of Negan’s face and he
leaned into her touch. His eyes closed when her fingers pushed into his wet, dark hair. “I’ve really
liked these last few days.”

“Me too,” Negan declared, his eyes opening and leaned in to press a kiss over the inside of her
knee. Looking over his shoulder, Negan checked on Sam before nodding toward his phone. “Could
you let me know the time?”

Getting up from the side of the pool, Y/N reached for Negan’s phone to see what time it was, “It’s
almost one.”

“Hey Sam,” Negan looked back over his shoulder and brushed his fingers through his wet hair.
“We should get some lunch in and then rest for a bit before going to the fair. Binge something for a
few to get some relax time in.”

Sam didn’t take much convincing and it was nice getting to relax with the two of them for a while
to watch things until they finally went to the fair together. It had been a very long time since Y/N
had ever been to a fair. So this was exceedingly new to her.

Sam was eager to play multiple games at the fair and in typical Negan fashion he would let her do
whatever she wanted. Y/N just stood beside Negan, holding his hand while they watched Sam
having fun.

“You know,” Sam pointed toward one of the games and drew Negan’s attention to one of the giant
bears. It was a game where it was a basketball shooting game and Negan slowly pulled his hand
from Y/N’s.

“You want the bear?” Negan confirmed and Sam shook her head. “You don’t?”

“I think you should get it for her,” Sam pointed at Y/N making her laugh when she did. “That’s
what good boyfriends do, right?”
“Do you want the bear?” Negan looked over his shoulder at Y/N, but before she could answer Sam
was tugging at Negan motioning him to lower down closer to her.

“You’re not supposed to ask if she wants it, you are just supposed to win it for her and then give it
to her. That way you look impressive,” Sam pat Negan on the shoulder and Negan let out an
amused sound before grinning.

Doing what Sam suggested, Negan went and did whatever the rules were to get the bear was and
surprisingly enough, he got it. Negan was good at basketball which was something that Y/N didn’t
expect because she thought Negan was originally training to be a baseball player. Negan moved
across the way and held the bear out to Y/N.

“My dear, this is for you,” Negan held out the bear and Y/N accepted the bear before Negan
looked down at Sam. “Was that good?”

“I think you should have kissed her,” Sam pointed out and Negan snorted before stepping forward
to look over Y/N. Leaning forward Negan quickly pecked Y/N, his eyes hooked on hers when he
slowly pulled away. “Better, you’ll get the hang of this dating thing soon.”

“Well, I’m glad I have the love guru here to tell me how to do things,” Negan snorted, reaching out
to wrap his arm around Y/N’s shoulders to pull her in closer to him. Sam wanted to go on a ride and
Negan urged Y/N to stay with him while Sam went. While they stood at the edge watching, Negan
moved behind Y/N to wrap his arms tightly around her waist. He nuzzled his nose against the side
of her neck and pressed a kiss against her flesh. “I’m sorry if that has been uncomfortable at all for
you. I know we’re not technically dating, but with Sam…”

“I’m not uncomfortable,” she interrupted him and reached down to slide her hands in over his and
found herself leaning further back into his chest. Turning slowly in his arms, she reached out to
trace her fingers in over the side of his face and Negan smirked. “I’m actually quite the opposite.
I’ve enjoyed this probably more than I should of.”

“Good. You’re a very special girl,” Negan muttered, his eyelids heavy as he stared deeply into her
eyes. His thumb slid in over her bottom lip and traced over it in a slow fashion. Leaning down, he
captured her lips in a kiss. The loud sounds of the fair seemed to drown out as Negan took his time
kissing her. Clutching to him tightly, everything felt perfect in the moment. The tender caress of his
fingertips, to the motions of his lips over hers getting stronger with each passing second that their
kiss continued. Brushing her fingers through his hair with her right hand while her left arm hooked
securely around his shoulders, she found herself falling into his chest. They had progressed so
much in the last few days. At first Negan was afraid to kiss her, but now he kissing her quite often.
Kissing her in ways that absolutely took her breath away. The sound of the ride moving was heard
and Negan pulled his mouth from hers to lift his head up to watch Sam. “I’m glad I got to see the
two of you interacting. I was worried at first that you wouldn’t be okay with being around kids
because Sam is a big part of my life.”

“She’s a pretty incredible girl,” Y/N kissed Negan one final time before turning in his arms to
watch Sam having what seemed to be the time of her life on the ride. “It’s very nice that Elaina and
Jane still let you spend so much time with her. I’m glad they do. The two of you have a special
bond and I love it.”

“Me too,” Negan hummed against the side of her neck before cuddling his chin in against her
shoulder. “After Lucille died, that little girl is the only thing that kept me hanging on.”

Y/N didn’t say anything; she just looked down to see the golden ring that was still around Negan’s
finger. Biting at her bottom lip, she knew that Negan still seemed to be hooked pretty heavily on
his wife. Negan was a beautiful mess. A perfect, beautiful…mess. Yet she liked him more because
of it.

Being held in Negan’s arms felt amazing. In the moment, she didn’t feel like they had a
compromise that they would help each other out. Instead of being the girl he was paying to be
around him, she actually did feel like she was his girlfriend. Surprisingly, she liked it. Feeling that
way made her feel special. Like she was important to someone for the first time in her life.
Originally, she didn’t plan on getting so attached to Negan, but it was hard not falling fast for him.

When Sam got back they went on multiple rides together this time. It was nice getting to spend time
with people that actually felt like a family. With her own family, Y/N felt like they were broken.
Like they had shattered a long time ago in terms of relationships, but with Negan and Sam the
missing puzzle in her life felt like all the pieces were together.

“Are you having fun?” Sam looked up at Y/N with big eyes while they waited for Negan who was
getting cotton candy for them. Immediately, Y/N nodded. She was truly having a good time. “You
know he really likes you, right? I can see it in the way he looks at you. It’s not just me trying to get
him together with someone because I want him happy. I just can see he really cares about you. I
haven’t seen him look like this since he lost my aunt. Usually he’s just sad.”

“I really like him too,” Y/N claimed knowing that Sam loved her uncle and wanted to make sure
that he was just happy.

“What are we talking about?” Negan came back, handing out the cotton candy to them. Reaching
out, Negan stole some of Y/N’s and plopped it into his mouth. A wide, crooked grin pressed in
over his handsome features after he finished with it.

“You,” Y/N answered truthfully and Negan snorted.

“All good things, I hope,” Negan winked and Sam looked up at Y/N with big eyes.

For the rest of the night, time seemed to pass exceedingly fast because they were enjoying
themselves so much. By the end of the night, Y/N was sitting beside Negan on the Ferris wheel
and Sam insisted being alone to herself so the two of them could be together.

“You are fucking beautiful, you know that?” Negan slurred, his eyes hooked on her as she shifted
in the seat when the wheel came to a stop. They were at the top giving them a view of the whole
fair that surrounded them down below from the night sky. “I’m glad we could do this the last few
days.”

“Me too,” she whispered letting out a surprised breath when Negan moved in to press a kiss over
her cheek. His kisses pressed down over her jawline before she turned in to meet him in another
kiss. It was a simple, sweet kiss, but she liked kissing him. “This has all been so different compared
to what I thought would be going on between us.”

“Would you even want to date a guy like me?” Negan’s right eyebrow arched up and he was
speaking quiet enough so Sam wouldn’t be able to hear him. “With all the baggage I’m carrying.”

“Is that even something I should be considering with the set-up we have going on?” Y/N bit down
on her bottom lip knowing that she had gotten her hopes up before with them.

“That doesn’t really answer the question. I asked if you would want to date a guy like me,” Negan
reminded her, his eyebrows arched up when he spoke. “I’m not saying you have to, I’m just
interested in knowing if you would ever be interested. I’m older. I’ve got baggage. I’m a little
broken.”

“I think you’re perfect Negan,” she blurt out and knew that she should have really thought it out
before she said it, but when she did say it the smile that expanded over his features was gorgeous.
There was a bit of a cockiness in the way he reacted, but he liked hearing her say that. “I like you.
There’s a lot to like. Even if you are broken.”

“Is that because you find me attractive?” Negan slid in closer to her when the ride started moving
again and she could feel the warmth of his breath in her face.

“If I said your looks didn’t play a part in how I felt, I would be a fucking liar,” she admitted
hearing Negan snort when his mouth was exceedingly close to hers. “You’re very gorgeous, but
spending time with you like this…you’re more than just looks.”

“Good answer,” Negan slurred, claiming her lips in another kiss that drew her to grasp at his hair.
They seemed to continue to kiss and the rest of the world just faded away for her. Kissing Negan
was something that she enjoyed greatly. Negan knew what he was doing. In the past she really
hadn’t enjoyed sharing moments like these, but everyone she had kissed in the past had never been
quite as good as Negan was. If you would have told her when this thing first started that she would
be this attached to Negan, she would have never believed you. Yes, she was exceedingly turned on
by him the first moment she had seen him, but she just wanted to be by him and with him. When
the Ferris wheel had stopped, they broke apart noticing that it was time to get off. Negan could see
that she blushed over when the people working the ride waited patiently for them to stop and it
made him snicker. “Come on baby girl.”

Following him off the ride they waited for Sam and when she approached them, her bright green
eyes were hooked on Negan’s, “Were the two of you just making out and holding up the ride?”

“No,” Negan lied and chuckled to himself, reaching his free hand out to Sam to grab hers while his
other hand held onto Y/N’s. “I think we’re winding down here kiddo. Your mom is going to come
and pick you up in the morning. If you’re absolutely exhausted she is going to kill me.”

“A few more games, then we can go. Okay?” Sam reasoned and Negan nodded. They ended up
staying longer than he probably planned. Negan had a hard time saying no to Sam, but within
reason.

When they finally did get back to Negan’s home, all three of them kind of crashed on Negan’s bed
together on top of the blankets after talking about their day. When morning finally came the girls
had woken up first and decided to let Negan sleep. They had agreed to go clean up the fort for
Negan and it was nice to actually spend some time alone with Sam.

“I think my uncle made a good choice with you,” Sam alerted Y/N from where she was at the other
side of the couch putting one of the cushions back where it belonged. “You kind of worry about the
people you care about and who they are dating. I’ve seen a lot of nice people date some nasty
people, but you…you’re special.”

“As are you kiddo,” Y/N gave Sam a wink knowing that it felt good to hear that Negan’s niece
thought highly of her. Part of her felt that maybe this was kind of a test to see how things would be
if she was in Negan’s life as more of a permanent role. Why would Negan have her around
otherwise? Either way, she liked it and the feeling it gave her. Feeling like she was part of a family
was something nice. Something she never knew that she would actually like. “I hope to get to
spend more time with you and Negan in the future.”

“Me too,” Sam helped finishing up, but when the sound of the doorbell ringing was heard Sam let
out a tense breath. “That’s mom.”

Rushing to the door, Sam pulled it open and Y/N shifted uncomfortably when Sam’s mother
walked into the room. Sam pushed into her mother’s lower back and pushed her toward Y/N. The
bright green eyes and the physical similarities to the photo Negan had on his fireplace mantle of
him and the woman together led her to believe this was Lucille’s sister.

“Mom, this is Y/N and she’s Negan girlfriend,” Sam was eager to introduce the two of them and
Elaina laughed when her daughter was eager for them to meet. “Y/N, this is my mother Elaina.”

“I’ve heard so much about you,” Y/N extended her hand to shake Elaina’s. She probably came off
shy, but this was someone who was actually a big part of Negan’s life and she was the sister to
Negan’s late wife. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“It’s great to meet you too,” Elaina smiled and before they could talk any further the sound of
footsteps coming around the corner was heard. Negan’s tired eyes connected with Elaina’s and he
offered up a weak smile. His messy hair showed that he had just woken up making Elaina chuckle
when saw him. “You’re looking very energetic this morning.”

“Tell me about it,” Negan groaned rubbing at his eyes with the back of his hand before moving
forward. Wrapping his arms around Elaina’s shoulders, he hugged her tightly and then looked
back. “Have you met…?”

“Sam just introduced us,” Elaina nodded and shoved her hands into her pockets while she looked
between them. “Did you have a good weekend baby?”

“I sure did! We had a lot of fun,” Elaina informed her mom with a bright smile.

“You should go get your bag baby, we have to meet your mother somewhere,” Elaina informed
Sam with a tilt of her head toward the door.

“I’ll get it with you,” Y/N suggested leaving Negan to be with Sam’s mother for a few minutes
alone. When Sam and Y/N disappeared down the hallway, Negan could sense that Elaina’s eyes
were locked on him.

“What?” Negan snorted with a wrinkled nose when Elaina folded her arms out in front of her chest.

“Since when have you had a girlfriend? We talk all the time and I’ve never heard about your
girlfriend. Please don’t tell me that you have a one night stand here with Sam,” Elaina whispered
and Negan hushed her placing his finger in front of his lips to keep her quiet. “Negan?”

“She’s not a one night stand. We haven’t even slept together yet. She’s not my girlfriend, but she’s
something,” Negan confessed, his brow line creasing when he thought about his agreement with
Y/N. That wasn’t something he was about to tell Lucille’s sister though. She would definitely look
down on him for it. “I just got sick of being lonely and we’re…helping each other. You know how
hard it is for me to get close to people after Lucille.”

“Oh, she’s something? Well I think she’s cute. She seems sweet and shy, kid of not your type,”
Elaina responded with a wrinkle of her nose and Negan chuckled.

“You just haven’t heard her when she gets excited. I swear the first time I heard her talk I thought I
was listening to Lucille,” Negan recalled how he had heard her having an argument with her father
the first time he had seen her. The side eye glance that Elaina gave him made him toss his hands up
in the air. “Yes, she reminds me of Lucille, but trust me she’s so…different as well.”
“Try giving this one a chance, okay? If you’re willing to have her around Sam, that’s…big,” Elaina
pointed out and Negan’s thick eyebrows bounced up. He bit down firmly on his bottom lip and let
out a long sigh. “I think Lucille would decide that maybe it was time for you to let go and finally
find some happiness.”

“I think Lucille would rather me be pining over her for the rest of my life. She liked being the
center of my world,” Negan corrected Elaina and he heard her laugh when he said that. “You know
I’m right. I think Lucille fully expected me to be broken for the rest of my life after losing her.”

“I also know that while my sister was very spicy, I know she loved you and would want you to be
happy,” Elaina watched Sam return with her bag with Y/N by her side. Right before she left, Sam
gave Y/N a big hug and Elaina gave Negan an impressed look by how much Sam seemed to like
Y/N. “Well it was a pleasure to meet you Y/N. I hope I see you again.”

“It was nice to meet you too,” Y/N grinned watching Negan kneel down and Sam ran to Negan’s
arms for him to pick her up in his arms. He grunted when he spun Sam and peppered kisses over
the side of her face.

“I love you kiddo,” Negan pressed a final kiss over Sam’s face hearing her laugh when he did it.
“Call me later, okay?”

“I promise,” Sam gave Negan a final big hug before he carefully set her down and they fist
bumped. It made Y/N impressed with how close the two of them actually were. When Sam left,
Negan actually seemed a little sad as he watched them walk to the car from the door.

“You okay?” Y/N moved in behind Negan to press her hand in over his shoulder to give it a firm
squeeze to be supportive and Negan nodded slowly. “That’s an incredible little girl. Thank you for
letting me be around.”

“And thank you for being so good this weekend with her,” Negan sighed reaching for his back
pocket to pull out his wallet. Y/N watched him open it to pull out a wad of cash after counting it.
Negan held it out making her tilt her head to the side. Her throat locked up when she looked down
at the money. “I promised you two-fifty for every day you spent with me. So…this is yours.”

“Oh, right,” Y/N felt absolutely terrible even hearing him say that. Even though she knew this was
their ‘compromise’, after spending all weekend with him and Sam, she kind of forgot about it.
Undoubtedly, her face had flushed over. Pocketing the money that Negan gave her, she had a hard
time looking him in the eye after he gave her the money. While she knew this was the deal they
came up with, part of her would have rather the lie they gave Sam be the truth. Instead of being
paid to spend time with him, she may have enjoyed the idea of them dating instead of what they
actually had going on better.

Negan put his wallet back in his back pocket and he looked at the time, “I have work in a few
hours, but if you want we can have breakfast? I can cook something really nice for you. What do
you say?”

“I should probably get out of your hair,” she muttered and she saw the expression he gave her was
one she couldn’t quite read. His eyebrows bounced up and his jaw locked up before he followed
her toward the door when she went to leave. “I had a nice time Negan.”

“Me too,” Negan gave her a wink and he leaned down to give her a kiss, but she turned her head
away and he let out a confused sound. Negan’s hazel eyes surveyed her over when she opened the
door and he seemed to stand there not sure what to do now that she had turned him away. “Hey
Y/N?”
“Yeah?” she stopped on his porch seeing the way he clutched to the doorknob.

“Did I do something wrong?” Negan wondered, clearly worried that he had done something.
Truthfully, he had done nothing wrong, he was just keeping up his end of the deal they had going
on. It just felt so dirty when it finally did happen and she didn’t like the way it made her feel.
Shaking her head, she said nothing. What was there to say at this point? Negan appeared to be
disappointed and very confused by everything, but sighed when she started to leave. “I guess I’ll
talk to you soon.”

“Right,” she waved before walking out the door and heading back to her home.

She went immediately to her room and set the money he gave her on the bed. It was a significant
amount of money to spend time with someone she actually found herself liking. Moving over
toward the window, she saw Negan standing on the porch smoking and he looked flustered. Maybe
she was wrong in leaving like that, but knowing that their relationship still consisted of this whole
money thing just made her feel strange at the end. Especially since she felt like she cared about
Negan more than she really should have.
 Chapter 6
Chapter Summary

After days of avoiding Negan, Y/N finally decides to go to his home when he tells her
he has something he wants to show her. There is some tension between the two when
they realize what they want from each other in their relationship is vastly different.

Chapter Notes

I'm sorry this took a while to update. Real life has been rough lately, but I'll do my best
to update this as soon as I can. Thanks to those that are still interested in this and
reading! Lots of love!

Stepping in front of Negan’s house, Y/N stared up at it and let out an apprehensive sigh. For a few
days Negan had been texting her and asking to see her. Even though it was exceedingly hard, she
hadn’t written him back or even responded. After having a wonderful few days that were spent
with Negan and Sam, she was disappointed when Negan had given her the money that he had
promised he would give her for spending time with him. Part of her didn’t even understand why
she was so damn upset with Negan. This was why she originally started spending time with him in
the first place. It was their deal. It was what they agreed upon, but it left her feeling dirty with her
mixed feelings that she had for Negan.

Part of her knew that she wanted to focus on her school and just get the money so she could help
herself since her parents had cut her off. Finishing school was her number one priority that she
wanted to focus on, but at the same time she wanted to have something more with Negan.
Originally she had just seen Negan as her very sexy neighbor. Immediately she wanted to get
sexual with him and having him willing to pay her to spend time with him seemed great. Then he
wanted to get to know her and make things special. After spending time with Sam, she realized that
there was so much more to Negan than she saw at first.

For days she contemplated what she wanted from Negan. After thinking about her future and the
things she most wanted in her life she realized it was best to have the kind of relationship they
originally agreed upon. One where she would just be paid to spend time with him was best.
Pretending that they were something more would just make things more complicated and keep her
focus off of her end goal with getting what she wanted next semester with college. She was so
close to finishing and she couldn’t let her parents’ negative attitude get in the way. The professor
that screwed her over was going to pay for what he did and Negan was going to help her get there.

Heading up the walkway to his door, Y/N knocked on the door and waited for Negan. Finally she
had written him back today after days of making him wait. She needed that money and it made
sense for her to continue on with this deal they had made together. There was no other job that was
willing to give her the kind of money that Negan was.

When the door pulled open, she felt a breath catch in her throat at the sight of Negan. As soon as he
saw her, a wide smile expanded over his handsome features. Negan clasped to the door while she
surveyed his body. Negan was wearing a pair of black slacks and had on a black long sleeved
Henley shirt that clung to his slender body. The top buttons were undone, revealing the dark hair
over Negan’s chest. Just the sight caused her body to heat up and she tried to force herself to look
away.

“I thought I was dreaming when you agreed to come over today,” Negan teased her with a small
chuckle. Avoiding looking at him didn’t last long when he reached out to slide his index finger in
underneath her chin. Delicately urging her to look up at him, she watched him step out on the porch
and he lowered in closer to her. “I was starting to think that you were avoiding me.”

The warmth of Negan’s breath etched in over her lips and she knew that he was closing the
distance to kiss her. Shuddering, the roughness of the pad of Negan’s thumb drew a line over her
bottom lip which made her close her eyes.

“I missed you,” Negan muttered before his mouth descended over hers. The soft sweep of his lips
over hers felt marvelous and instantly made her drop her guard. Initially she thought she wouldn’t
kiss him. Kissing him only made her like him more, but it wasn’t like she had a choice in the
matter. Right? Caress after tender caress of Negan’s lips over hers drew her to fall in against his
chest and his arms loosely wrapped around her waist. “I couldn’t stop thinking about you.”

“Negan,” she breathed out while Negan’s mouth continued to deposit kisses from her mouth, over
her jaw and down her neck. It made her whimper and she breathlessly pressed her hand in over the
center of Negan’s chest to get him to stop. “My parents are home. The last thing I need is for them
to come outside and see us together.”

“You’re an adult; you can make your own decisions. It’s been quite a while since you were a
teenager,” Negan reminded her with a snicker and moved in to attempt to kiss her again, but she
blocked him by pressing her fingers over his lips. Negan’s face scrunched up in amusement and she
looked over her shoulder to make sure they were still good. “You’re a grown woman now.”

“I know, but trust me…they wouldn’t be okay with this,” she swore, pushing into the center of his
chest to get him into his house. Once they got the door closed, Negan continued to move in closer
to her. Each step drew her to step back as well until her back hit the door. Lifting his arms, his
palms pressed up against the door at the sides of her body to trap her there. The way his eyes were
hooked on hers caused her to tremble just at the sight of him. The warmth of his body undoubtedly
had her yearning for more. Just with one look Negan could turn her to absolute mush and it was
hard to fight the way she felt. Small tremors were filling her body while Negan tilted his head to
the side and a cocky smile tickled in over the corners of his lips. “You said you have something
you want to show me?”

“I have a few things,” Negan slurred, his eyes falling to her lips and it made her heart hammer
inside of her chest. There were goosebumps developing over her arms and there was an
uncontrollable chill that ran down her spine when Negan pressed in closer to her. “I haven’t been
able to stop thinking about you since that day you left.”

“Oh?” she simply muttered and Negan’s tongue licked over his bottom lip. Closing the distance
between the two of them, Negan’s body brushed up against hers and she suddenly realized that any
decisions she made when she wasn’t around Negan were quickly leaving her. Thinking one thing
when she wasn’t in front of him was easy, but when the warmth of his body was pressed against
hers it was hard to keep her mind from sticking to her guns. Negan had her closed in, but
honestly…she liked it. “Has it been hard for you Negan?”

“Very,” Negan mused with a wicked breath, leaving just enough distance to tease her with the idea
of kissing her, but not just doing it quite yet. “You build me up and get me excited at the idea of
more and then you leave me hanging. You know how to make a man suffer.”

“Maybe that was my plan. To make you want me more,” she slurred and Negan’s right eyebrow
arched in curiosity. Watching his jaw flex, she teasingly rocked her hips against his and saw him
breathe out sharply. Doing it again caused his eyes to slam shut and she dragged her nails down the
center of his chest. Enthusiastically reaching down, she pulled apart the belt in his pants knowing
that she was wildly attracted to Negan. Since she had seen him naked in the shower, she was
desperate to get a look at him again. Especially since things were cut so entirely short in the
shower when Sam had arrived the other day. Getting the material unhooked, she impatiently pulled
apart his pants and fumbled to get the material apart. “Did you jerk off thinking about me?”

“Y/N,” he growled out her name when she snaked her hand beneath the material of his pants to
caress over him through the material of his boxer briefs. Pressing his forehead to hers, she could
hear his loud breaths surrounding her and it made her absurdly hot.

“Answer the question,” she demanded and Negan groaned when she squeezed at his body making
him fall forward against her. His nose nuzzled against the side of her neck and the warmth of his
breath over her flesh caused her to shake. “Did you jerk off thinking about me Negan?”

“So many times,” Negan proclaimed, his lips pressing kisses over her earlobe while he felt her
struggling to push at his pants and his boxer briefs to get them down his hips. Before she could, he
stopped her and took in a sharp breath. “Wait…I need to know something.”

“What could you possibly want to know that is stopping you from this? Don’t you want to know
how my mouth feels? I’ll happily get on my knees for you right now,” she offered in a whisper
watching the way Negan’s eyelids got heavy and he growled when she reached for his pants again.

“I need to know why you avoided me,” Negan swallowed down hard and she felt her whole body
tense up when he asked her that. Trying to shake off the feeling she left him with, Negan pulled his
pants back together. Visibly she was disappointed to see him buttoning his pants back together, but
Negan seemed pretty keen to know why she disappeared for so long. “I thought things were good
between the two of us. You wanted more from me, I was giving you more. Was it because of Sam?
Did the bond I have with her scare you off?”

“Jesus, Negan. No,” she wished he wouldn’t have gone to this and she found it hard to look him in
the eyes when he brought up Sam. Guilt ate away at her when she thought about Sam because she
actually did love spending that time with both Sam and Negan.

“It was Sam, wasn’t it? You had this idea of someone who was this sexy, rich bachelor and I’m
really just this broken widow that…” Negan started to ramble and she brazenly stepped forward to
grab a hold of his face to get him to look at her. There was a sense of grief behind his eyes and he
was evidently confused about the two of them. “God, I’m so attracted to you, but I want something
more here. My heart is telling me that there should be something more here…”

“Trust me it has nothing to do with Sam,” she claimed, lowering her hands from his face and
Negan folded his arms in front of his chest. There was some tension and confusion about why she
had been avoiding him. Part of her wished he didn’t care so much and didn’t have the need to
know. It just made things uncomfortable and problematic. “It’s complicated.”

“I understand complicated. My whole life has been complicated,” Negan snorted, letting out a long,
theatrical breath. Seeing Negan disheveled wasn’t normal from what she had seen from him. It was
obvious that he wanted her, it was more than evident she turned him on, but it seemed like he was
desperate to have her accept him for who he was. What she thought was going to be one thing with
her deal with Negan turned into something else entirely. “I thought we were in a good place, but
then Sam left and you basically ran out that door.”

“I really enjoyed my time with you and Sam. It reminded me of all the things that I never had
growing up. It felt like a family and trust me, I would love to be able to do that again,” she began
feeling her body still shaking from the close contact she had previously with Negan. There was a
tingling in her body. It wanted Negan, both physically and mentally. The two of them were
incredibly attracted to each other and from the moment Negan asked her to be in his life, she was
eager to sleep with him. Maybe that was immoral of her to want that, but it wasn’t often people like
him wanted to be with someone like her. A lot of people couldn’t handle her spicy attitude, but
Negan embraced it and was charmed by her brashness. “It was when you gave me the money that
things went wrong.”

“Did I give you the wrong amount?” Negan frowned not understanding why that would upset her
like it did.

“No, it was the right amount. It was just, I spent those days with you and I found myself wanting
everything we told Sam to be real. I wanted to be your girlfriend and I wanted to have that kind of
life with you,” she was honest and she saw Negan’s eyes get wide from her saying that. It was
definitely shock that she confessed something like that. Shakily reaching up, his long fingers
pushed into his hair and she didn’t know how to say this without sounding irrational. Hell, she
didn’t even know why her mind was thinking the way it was lately. “Then you gave me the money
and it reminded me all over again of what we actually had going on here.”

“So…you would like that? Being my actual girlfriend?” Negan’s words came out in a bit of a
stutter while he shifted his weight before her. There was a smirk that developed over his lips and
she felt her chest ache when he said it. “If that’s something you’re interested in, I mean…we could
give it a shot. Fuck, I know that it may be strange, but…”

“It would never work,” she directly cut him off seeing the dissatisfied look he gave her and his
eyebrows creased as soon as the words left her lips. “When I left the other day, I had it in my mind
that I thought the two of us could be something. The longer I spent time away from you, the more I
realized it wouldn’t work. We were only using each other for specific things. I want to go back to
school and I need the money to help myself because my parents won’t. At some point I’m going to
have the meeting with the board and I’m going to go back to school. You…you just want to not be
lonely anymore. So at the end, our relationship would be built on something that was completely
phony.”

“I’m confused. You are giving two completely different vibes here Y/N. First you are telling me
that you would like to have a relationship like we told Sam we were and now I’m not sure what
you are saying…” Negan stammered finding himself confused with her overall feelings about
things.

“It means it’s best for us to keep up with our deal from the beginning. Wanting a relationship out of
this when in reality you were just supposed to be my sugar daddy so to speak just seems like
having a relationship was already spoiled from the start,” she bluntly stated and Negan’s jaw
contracted when she said that. Lowering his gaze, Negan nodded and she cleared her throat. “It’s
probably best for us not to attempt to have any kind of relationship at all other than what we had
before.”

“I don’t want that,” Negan grunted, lifting his eyes and she could see his eyebrow arching as he
spoke. “I like you and you like me too. If we start having sex and fooling around with this whole
deal we had before, I’m just going to get attached to you. If you’re in the mindset that you don’t
want me to get attached to you it means if you sleep with me you are just going to do what
everyone else does. Use me for sex and then leave, that’s not what I wanted. If we’re going to stick
with the whole original plan where we just spend time together and you don’t want to be together,
then we’re not having sex or any sexual contact at all. I like you. A lot and if I’m going to respect
what you want, then I have no problem giving you the money while pampering you, but sex is out
of question.”

“I guess…” she felt her throat go dry. She wasn’t expecting that. Negan was tense and she could
see that her comment saddened him which she wasn’t expecting. It seemed like Negan wanted a
relationship more than the original thing and she would have never guessed that from him.
Previously it seemed like he would have a hard time starting a relationship due the fact that he was
still hooked on his late wife. He was still wearing his wedding ring for fuck’s sake. “I guess I have
to respect your wishes.”

“Then I should show you what I called you over for then,” Negan still avoided eye contact with her
and waved her to follow him. Damn, she felt bad. When Negan turned on his heel and then headed
down the hallway, she delayed for a minute. Maybe she made a mistake, but what the hell could
she do now about it? It was already said and they had already agreed upon it. Sluggishly following
Negan through the hall, she watched Negan stop in front of the room they had been painting the
last time she was here. Standing before it, Negan turned to face her and when his eyes connected
with hers, she could tell he was putting on his best fake face. “I worked really hard on this room
while you were gone. Trying to put together what I thought you would like.”

“Negan…” she let out a shuddering breath feeling remarkably guilty since she knew this was the
project they had talked of doing while they were together. Negan hushed her and she bit back on
her words feeling the guilt eating away at her. Negan opened the door and stepped back into the
room giving her the space to step inside. Seeing how decked out he made the room drew her to
make a gasp of awe. It was set up like a bedroom and entertainment room. There was an office area
in the corner with a desk and everything she would need for when she got back working on her
classes.

“I wanted to make sure that if you needed to come over for an escape that you would have
everything you needed,” Negan informed her while looking around the room that he had worked
tremendously hard on while they had their time apart. “I got you a laptop, one of the best. There is
a bookshelf for you to put you know…your law books and shit. The clothes that we bought on our
first mall trip together are in the drawers and some are hung up. I thought the room felt a little
empty, so I got you that couch.”

Watching Negan pull open the door to the closet, she could see all the clothes she made him buy
for her when she was jealous on their first time out were nicely put away. Looking over her
shoulder, she saw the teddy bear that Negan had won for her sitting by the headboard at the top of
the bed that was in the center of the room.

“The television is hooked up. This room is meant to really be your own little hideaway. Whenever
you need it, it’s here,” Negan sighed with a shrug of his shoulders, “I’ll get you a key and you’re
welcome in my home anytime you want.”

“Are you sure?” she was surprised that he was willing to give her that much. Not many people
would trust someone like that and he nodded. “Thank you. This is incredible Negan.”

“It’s no problem. It was what I promised you and what not,” Negan rubbed at the side of his face
and he stretched his jaw before looking toward the door. “I don’t know if you want to stay here or
if you want to leave, I just wanted to show you that this was here. I was excited when I got it
finished.”

“I mean…I don’t have other plans,” she fished for him to ask her to stay. Damn, she wished she
would have waited until he showed her what he wanted to. This was all entirely too sweet and she
knew that Negan had worked very hard on all of this.

“Oh, I have something for you,” Negan motioned her to wait and he headed for the door, “I’ll be
right back.”

When Negan pulled the door open and speedily walked out of the room, it left her feeling awkward
being alone in this room. This was hers. It was a place where she could escape her family. It was
like having an apartment, except it was something she didn’t have to pay for at all and it was really
nice. Looking things over, she took her time to inspect all the things Negan had done for her.
Moving over toward the edge of the bed, she lowered down on the edge of it and swallowed down
hard. The bed felt better than the one she had at home. This was the perfect place to be, but now
she just felt dreadful being there after the things she had said. It was embarrassing she said all of
that after he had worked to give her all of this.

Gasping, she felt the bed dipping behind her and it was clearly Negan that had returned, but she
was so lost in herself that she didn’t hear him reenter the room, “Close your eyes for a minute.”

“You’re kidding,” she chuckled and Negan grunted against her earlobe when she didn’t do what he
asked.

Obeying, she closed her eyes and felt him moving in behind her. The warmth of his body pressed
against hers caused her to let out a shuddering exhale. This whole no sex thing was going to be
extraordinarily complicated for her. The coolness of something pressed in over her neck and it
made her jump somewhat when Negan hooked something together at the back of her neck.

“You can open them now,” Negan instructed and the warmth of him pulled away from her.
Disappointment flooded her veins when she thought about the things he could have done being
close like that, but he didn’t. Opening her eyes, she carefully got up from the bed and moved over
toward the mirror that was hung above the dresser. When she saw it was a diamond necklace, she
let out a quivering breath. “It matches the bracelet I got you. So now you have a matching pair. The
bracelet is in the jewelry box over there.”

“Negan, this is incredible,” she reached up to touch the necklace finding herself charmed with the
necklace. No one had bought her things like this, ever. The amount of money he had spent on her
during their break was ridiculously high. This was a lot. “You didn’t have to do this. You didn’t
have to do any of this.”

“I uh…I missed you so I wanted to get you something special for when I saw you again,” Negan
gave her a wink and moved over toward her bed to sit on the corner of it. With Negan’s big eyes
staring up at her as she turned to look at him, she felt her breath get caught in her throat. “I just
want you to have the best of the best. I actually just want you happy.”

“Listen…” she exhaled loudly, seeing Negan tilt his head to the side when she started speaking up.
“I feel like we started things off wrong. The stuff I said in the hallway…”

“It’s okay. I understand. You would rather just have what I offered you to begin with. A life of
being pampered until you’re ready to stop and I’m okay with that,” Negan assured her with a
simple nod of his head. When he bit at his lip she couldn’t tell if he was serious or not, but she
definitely regretted their original encounter. “The only thing I’m taking off the list is the whole sex
thing. I know how I feel about you and I have to tell myself that it’s only a professional thing at
this point. Not something real. Having sex would make this real for me and I just can’t do that to
myself right now. I hope you can understand that.”

“Well, I didn’t say it wasn’t real,” she attempted to rebuttal, but he held his hands up in the air to
stop her from doing so.

“Don’t worry about it,” Negan still seemed like he had a hard time looking her in the eyes and
when there was a bit of silence between them, Negan pointed toward the door. “I was thinking of
making some dinner. Do you want to stay for dinner? You can look at things in here if you want or
join me while I cook. If you would rather just go, that’s fine too.”

“I’d love to have dinner with you,” she insisted following him toward the kitchen. Sitting at the
island in his kitchen, she watched him gather some things from the fridge and cleared her throat.
“Is there anything I can do to help you?”

“You don’t have to do that,” Negan set things out on the counter and she stood up from her seat to
move in beside him. With her sliding in beside him, Negan looked to her and a slight grin pressed
in over his handsome features. “You want to cut some vegetables for me?”

“I can do that,” she agreed to help him with that while he prepared their main dish. Keeping her
eyes on him, Y/N was trying to think of something to say to bring up what they had talked about
with their relationship. She definitely felt for Negan more than just on a professional level. It’s just
she had focused for so long on her degree and getting a good job that she didn’t want to ruin it on
having emotions for a guy. Especially if it was a guy that would lead to nothing serious in the end
since he still seemed very much hooked on his wife that had passed away. “So what have you been
up to since we last saw each other?”

“Just work really. I had taken Sam to the movies the other day and we had some dinner,” Negan
informed her while she took her time with the vegetables. There was a need to want to be close to
him and she liked being able to talk to him. It had been so boring since she had been to herself.
“She really liked meeting you. I’m sure you’ll be happy to know that. It will suck when I have to
tell her that we’re not really a couple. With what you want, it really doesn’t leave time open to
spend more time with her.”

That comment left her quiet. Negan was still upset with what she had admitted she wanted earlier
and she didn’t want to say something to upset him more. She had already done enough. The idea of
not being able to have moments like that with Negan sounded dreadful. Fuck, what did she do?
Getting to spend time with Negan and Sam showed her the best parts of Negan. The most appealing
parts and she legit just told him she didn’t care to have moments like that with him.

“I was thinking about this and I don’t know if it will help,” Negan stammered as she finished up
with the vegetables and he mixed it in with what he was getting ready for dinner. “I know some
people; some important people that may be able to help you with your school problem. Instead of
making you wait until next semester, maybe we could get them to move your appeal up. They
could help you and…”

“While that’s very nice and I appreciate it, this is something I think I want to be able to take care of
myself,” she was honest and saw the way that his eyebrows bounced up. While she respected him
offering to help her, she had already set her plan in motion. In a few days she was going to meet up
with the guy from AV club that had managed to steal the video of what she had done to her
professor’s car. They had no evidence against her. Because of that and the lack of their proof; they
would have no choice, but to drop their expelling of her. Then she could return to school. “I have
no doubt that everything is going to go over well, but it was very nice of you to offer.”
“You know, I could probably get you into a better school next semester if you want and you
wouldn’t even have to worry about that professor or a school that wanted to throw you under the
bus. The universities I could get you into, they would never ignore a sexual harassment case,”
Negan offered keeping his eyes hooked on her while she shifted beside him uneasily. “It would be
starting over new for you, but you would be in a place that…”

“Listen; there are a lot of things that you I don’t mind you doing for me, but school and work are
something I can handle on my own. I’ve never been handed anything in my life. I’ve worked for
everything I have and I’d like to keep it that way when it comes to school and work,” she stated
firmly and Negan look surprised with her answer before nodding gradually. “I realize I’m accepting
your money for school and that’s…not exactly doing it on my own, but…”

“We can change the subject, it’s fine,” Negan guaranteed her and when he went to turn away from
her, he felt her grabbing a hold of his jaw to pull him to her. When her lips hammered in over his he
stopped what he was doing and grabbed a soft grasp of her hips. Repeatedly they kissed over and
over again. He reached up to cup her face in his large hands the longer the kiss went drawing the
both to be breathless when he managed to pull his lips away from hers. “Wait…”

“I just don’t want you to think that I don’t value you,” she muttered against his lips and could see
his eyes filled with desire. “I do appreciate the offer and I know you’re just doing what’s best for
me. It’s not you being a jerk, I just…I want to be something special because of me. Not because of
the amazing guy across the street that wanted to help me.”

“I understand,” Negan swallowed down hard. His breathing was loud enough for her to hear and
she smirked while she caressed over the side of his rough face.

“Is kissing okay? I know we’re not supposed to have sex,” she inquired, her thumb sliding in over
the fullness of his bottom lip. It drew him to close his eyes and let out a sharp sigh. Taking
advantage she tipped up on her toes again to start delicately kissing at Negan’s lips. How much
Negan liked her surprised her. When he first asked her of this, she didn’t think either of them would
take this very seriously, but she had Negan hooked around her finger pretty easily. Then again, she
was pretty addicted to the idea of him too.

“I reckon kissing isn’t so bad,” Negan nibbled softly at the pad of her thumb. There was a sense of
desperation when he curled his fingers around her neck to pull her in to kiss him again. With the
tender sweeps of his lips over hers, she couldn’t help wrapping her arms around his shoulders to
hold him close. Stepping forward, she backed him up against the counter and heard him grunt
when it hit his lower back. The movement caused him to knock over one of the utensils and he
cussed when he looked down between them. “Maybe…I think we should get back to cooking.”

“Okay,” she let go of Negan, even though she would have rather kept on kissing him. While Negan
was cooking, he kept asking her questions to try to obviously keep them busy. They were fighting
not grabbing at each other and they both made it easy to see they would rather be doing that. By the
time she was sitting across from Negan eating, she realized she actually enjoyed very much
spending time with him. In the short amount of time they had been together today that was better
than the entire time she had been separated from him. Without a doubt, Negan had one of the most
contagious smiles and laughs. Whenever he smiled she found herself smiling. The same thing with
his laughter, when his nose would wrinkle and he giggled it would lead her to doing the same.
God, she was so stupid to think that she wouldn’t and couldn’t feel anything for him. “You know I
really did miss being around you. Talking to you is nice. It puts me in a better mood.”

“Well, I was here the last few days,” Negan reached for his beer to take a sip of it and his eyebrow
arched in response making her let out a tiny chuckle. That was an attempt at a jab, but in a polite
way. He was telling her she could have been there with him the whole time and she knew it. “And
now whenever you need me, you have a room here too. So, you don’t have to hide from me.”

“I got scared Negan,” she confessed and Negan’s head tilted to the side as he set the bottle back
down on the table they were eating dinner at. The expression Negan gave her showed he didn’t
understand what she meant by that and she sighed. “I’ve been so serious about finishing my
education and being the best. I wanted to focus on mainly that and I wanted to get the best job
possible. Then things fell to shit and I met you. Since I met you… all I can think about is you.
From the moment I first laid eyes on you, the only thing I can think about is you. The first day I
saw you, all I could think about is how much that professor pissed me off and how I was going to
get revenge. Now…”

“Well I don’t want you to quit everything you worked for in order to be around me,” Negan
frowned, reaching up to rub his fingers through his short hair in a stressed manner. “I don’t want to
screw up your life and if being with me makes it that way…”

“You’re not screwing up my life,” she interrupted him, leaning forward closer to the table and she
let out a tense breath. “I’m just saying for once in my life I’m thinking about something other than
my future. So those few days I took a break from…you, I was trying to convince myself that I was
just enamored with you. You’re sexy, you’re sweet, you’re charming…”

“Then date me,” Negan blurt out and his words shocked her when he said it. Tossing his right hand
up in the air, he made a dramatic expression and shrugged his shoulders. “I like spending time with
you. You don’t feel right with me giving you money. Date me. Be my girlfriend. I promise the
only thing I want to do is help you. I’ll support you every step of the way. You’re the first person
I’ve longed to be around in years.”

“Because I remind you of your wife,” she pointed out and Negan’s jaw flexed when she said that.
Shifting uncomfortably in her seat, she realized that she must have been coming off cold. Negan
asked her to be his girlfriend and instead of saying yes, she brought up what she thought was the
obvious. Damn, she would be lucky as hell to be with Negan, but still there was the fear that once
he realized who she really was he may not want her anymore. “I don’t think us dating would work
out. You’ll realize at some point I’m nothing like your wife and the charm will be gone.”

“I don’t want a replica of Lucille,” Negan snorted, his face scrunching up because he was visibly
frustrated with her response to him. “Yeah, you reminded me of her the first time I heard you
chewing out your father, but you’re not her. I want you and I think it’s a little early for us to decide
if the charm will be lost because right now it’s very much there. I like you. Sam likes you. The
most important people in my life already think you are my girlfriend. What’s wrong with that?
Fuck, I’m failing to see the problem.”

“Because I care about my education and getting a career way too much,” she explained and
Negan’s eyebrows bounced up when she said it. “If I date you, I’m going to get used to this life.
Being with you all the time, wanting to be pampered by you. I’m going to want to spend time with
you and Sam. I’ll want that family life that I never thought I wanted. I never wanted a life like that
because my parents turned me off of it. I wanted to have a good career. I don’t want to be someone
who has a family and is just focused on the person they love.”

“Love is the one thing that makes life worth living. Trust me, I have the money and it doesn’t
make you happy. My father had the career and while I completely support you wanting to make a
career for yourself I know it doesn’t always make you happy. You need both love and a career. I
would do whatever you wanted to help you achieve the future you wanted,” Negan insisted, laying
his hands flat out on the table and he could see the nervousness in her eyes. “Fuck Y/N, I’m not
asking you to marry me and have children with me, I’m just asking you to date me.”

“I’m sorry, but I can’t,” she bit down on her bottom lip and the look Negan gave her almost seemed
like he was completely gutted with her answer. Reaching up, Negan pinched at the bridge of his
nose and then snorted. “I know the person I want to be…”

“God you send so many mixed signals. You’re more like Lucille than I thought,” Negan informed
her hearing the sound of the timer going off for the dessert that he had put together and in the oven
for them. The last comment confused her when Negan stood up from the table and left the dining
room to go to the kitchen. Instead of keeping up with their conversation she watched Negan
immediately go back to work to putting together their dessert. Following him into the kitchen, she
was frozen while she watched him. After putting some of the fruity dessert into the bowl, he
moved for the freezer to pull out some ice cream. “Am I not good enough?”

“It’s not a matter of being good enough Negan. My parents if they found out I was dating you…”
she reasoned with him hearing him snort.

“Who gives a fuck what your parents think? You already told me yourself that you don’t give a
shit. Plus, it’s not like you even need their approval or their money. You have me,” Negan
reminded her and she sighed heavily. “Am I too old? Is it because I’m a teacher? Would that not be
an appropriate career choice for your boyfriend to have?”

“It’s complicated,” she watched him set the bowl of dessert for her out, pushing it to her on the
counter. Catching the bowl, she watched him reach for his and nod toward the outside. There were
so many factors as to why she was making this decision. It was all hard to explain. Truthfully, she
was just a mess and she knew that.

“I need to fucking smoke right now. Enjoy your dessert,” Negan grabbed his bowl and headed
outside leaving her in the center of his kitchen feeling exceedingly lost with what she was going to
do next.

This all stemmed from the fact that she just wanted to follow through with her career. Growing up,
she had an idea of what she wanted in her life. Never did she think she would have this incredible
guy drop into her life like this. The family lifestyle was not something she wanted, ever. That’s
what she had convinced herself for so long. Ultimately, if she started dating Negan, she was scared
that she would get comfortable in life with him and her dedication she had toward her career would
slowly fade.

Moving to the door with the bowl in her hand, she stood at the back door and saw Negan moving
over toward the outside furniture set he had on his deck. A lot of people would find her stupid for
not immediately saying yes to Negan. Looking at his house, she could tell that he had taste…as
well as money. Negan was a great catch, but she was just stubbornly stuck to her own ways. Negan
dramatically dropped down on the white sofa that was part of the set. He set the bowl of his dessert
aside and then shifted his hips to pull his box of cigarettes from his pocket. Negan grabbed one of
the cigarettes with his teeth before tossing the package aside and digging in his pocket for his
lighter.

Stepping out onto the deck, she saw Negan’s eyes rising to hers and she could see that he was
frustrated with her. When Negan flipped open his lighter, she moved forward and reached out to
stop him from lighting the cigarette. Setting her bowl down on the table, she turned to him and
pulled the cigarette from between his lips. Setting it down on the couch beside him, she set the
lighter there as well. Staying quiet, Negan didn’t say anything. With how tight the material of his
black Henley was, she could see that he was breathing heavily.
Straddling Negan, she heard him let out a surprised sound when she lowered herself enough to
keep him where he was. Reaching for his bowl of dessert, she scooped some out onto the spoon and
led it to Negan’s mouth, “Open.”

Part of Negan wanted to bicker with her, but instead he submitted and allowed her to feed him a
spoonful of the sweet, berry dessert. With his eyes fixated on her, he could see that she was moving
for another scoop of it. Parting his lips when she brought it to his mouth again, Negan waited for
her to feed him again only for her to let out an amused breath when she pulled the spoon away.
Stealing the bite for herself gave her a big amount of pride when his brow arched at her actions.
When the taste of the dessert hit her tongue, she moaned and felt him shift uncomfortably beneath
her.

The warmth of the berry cobbler he had made with the coolness of the vanilla ice cream mixed
beautifully. Connecting eyes, she saw Negan’s tongue slide out over his bottom lip and his eyes
narrowed while he stared out at her. They should have been talking about things. She knew that. It
was just she was never very good at that. Then again, she didn’t have a good example of how
things should be when it came to her family. All they did was fight and have heated discussions
that never went well for her.

“You’re a very talented man Negan,” she slurred feeding him another spoonful of his dessert.
Shifting over his body again, she lowered her hips in closer to his and was purposely trying to
tempt him. When she got another spoonful for him, she purposely dripped some of the melting ice
cream on his jaw. Grabbing a hold of his face with her hand, she set the bowl aside and leaned
forward. Dragging her tongue over the line of ice cream over his face, she took her time with it. It
caused Negan to groan when she reached his lips and dragged her tongue over his bottom lip.
Flicking her tongue teasingly at the inside of his bottom lip made his lips part and she took control
with a seductive kiss. Tangling her fingers into Negan’s hairs, she teased her tongue against his
when she got him to kiss her. The lingering taste of the succulent dessert still lingered in Negan’s
mouth while they kissed. It was a wild and reckless kiss that led Negan’s hands to her hips where
she had started to softly rock her hips against his. “Something tells me in many ways.”

“Fuck,” Negan grunted, his head lowering while she rubbed up against him. Dropping his head
back against the couch, Negan clutched tightly to her. The movement she was doing over him was
showing that she was doing her best to appeal to him. With the sounds Negan was making, she felt
like her body was on fire. There was no question that the moment had them both hot and bothered,
but there was something that flashed over in Negan’s eyes when he looked to the way she was
grinding up against him. Attempting to kiss him again, Negan denied the kiss and she felt his grasp
on her hips getting tighter to stop her from moving them. “You really just want me to fuck you,
don’t you? That’s all you want, right? To be fucked, no strings attached.”

Unsure of what to say, she watched Negan roll his eyes and he pushed her carefully from his hips to
reach for his bowl. Negan moved over toward the side of the house and rest his back against it,
“Funny how you have no problem wanting to fuck me, but you have a problem with dating me.”

“Why are you so against having sex with me?” she bit back and Negan’s right eyebrow arched in
response. Rolling his eyes, Negan continued to eat the melting food that he had made for himself.

“Why are you so against dating me?” Negan repeated her question and she bit down on her bottom
lip. Damn, he was really pushing hard for this whole dating thing.

“I already told you,” she thought back to everything she had told him earlier.

“Well I already told you why I don’t want to have sex with you. I’ve been telling you from day
one. I wanted to make things special for you originally, now I know that if I have sex with you I’m
going to get way too fucking attached to you. I haven’t felt things for someone in a very long time,
but with you…” Negan wanted to say something more, but after their conversation tonight he
didn’t think it was the best idea. Rolling his eyes, Negan knew that this conversation would lead
them nowhere and he just didn’t feel like putting up with it right now. It was just going to lead
them right back where they started. Frustrated, he just decided to let this whole thing go. “Just eat
your dessert before it melts completely.”

“Negan,” she frowned watching him heading back into the house and she grabbed her bowl to
follow him in. What was she supposed to say? Watching him do the dishes, she wanted to say the
right thing. She wanted to do the right thing, but at this point she didn’t know what it was. When he
finished the dishes and put the left-overs away, he reached for his beer that was still on the table
and walked toward his living room. “Would you talk to me?”

“What do you want to talk about Y/N?” Negan sat down on the couch at the middle of it and
stretched out his body while he took a big swallow of his beer.

“You know, originally the deal was that you wanted someone to spend time with you. You told me
that we would only have sex if I wanted to,” she thought back to the first conversation about the
rules of their relationship and Negan’s head tilted to the side. What she originally thought this was
going to be was not at all what this was. When Negan offered up to do this with her, she really just
thought the two of them would have sex and he would buy her anything she wanted. Never in her
wildest dreams did she think that Negan would want to date her or want something more than a
short, sexually fueled fling.

“I also told you that I would only pay you two hundred for every day that you were with me, but
I’ve paid you two-fifty the last few times because I’ve been trying to help you,” Negan simply
stated with a shrug of his shoulders. “But if I remember correctly, I told you that when we finally
did have sex you would be begging me for it. That you would want it more than anything else in
the world.”

“I’ve been begging for it,” she chuckled and Negan dramatically threw his hands up in the air
before finishing off his beer.

“Fuck, I remember us agreeing that I was going to be your dominant and you were going to be my
submissive to a degree,” Negan outstretched to set the empty beer bottle down on the table that
was beside the couch where a coaster was. There was a moment of silence between them and
Negan shifted on the couch. “Do a dance for me.”

“What?” she snickered, thinking he was joking. It was only when he started spinning his finger in
the air did she realize that he was serious. “What kind of dance?”

“Whatever kind of dance you think will convince me to fuck you. You want me to fuck you? Make
me want you,” Negan demanded, his eyes narrowing while he stared out at her and she smirked.
“I’m serious.”

“There isn’t any music,” she pointed out while Negan got more comfortable on the couch, his eyes
staring out at her expectantly.

Making a dramatic expression, Negan waited for her to move and gradually she started shake her
hips side to side. Negan’s stare was dark as she used her body the best way she knew how to get
what she wanted. Most people were easier to crack. To get what she had wanted from Negan was
so hard. Then again, she had never wanted someone like she wanted Negan.

Leisurely walking closer toward where Negan was, she took her time pulling her shirt from her
body and Negan let out a long sigh. Stroking her fingers down her chest, toward her abdomen and
to the top of her pants, she felt ridiculous but knew how much she wanted Negan to want her.
Turning away from Negan she moved in a way that she thought he would like. Stealing a look over
her shoulder while she wiggled her hips she could see that his eyes were hooked on her. Hooking
her fingers into her pants, she pulled them down very meticulously, pushing her bottom out when
she did it. Stepping out of her pants, she felt bare in front of him, but was following through with
what he told her. This was her attempt at making him want her.

Crawling carefully in over Negan, she began to roll her hips while she was on her knees above him.
What he requested was a dance, but had turned into a lap dance. The sound of Negan swallowing
down hard was heard. It was affecting him whether he wanted it to or not. Turning to face away
from him, she placed her hand on his thighs and rubbed her bottom against his groin making him
groan out when she did it. There was a sharp hiss that fell from his throat with the friction her body
had over his.

Angling her body, she leaned back so she was resting her back against Negan’s chest and he was
breathing loudly. Hooking her fingers into his hair, she turned her head to the side hinting that she
was going to attempt to kiss him. The way Negan’s pupils were dilated, she could tell that she had
him hot, “Maybe we can start off small…”

Continuing to rock her bottom over him led her to feel the solid form of his masculinity growing
beneath his black slacks. Slipping down to her knees she took her time turning toward Negan and
he licked his lips while she gathered herself. Sliding her hands up his knees, toward his thighs and
then back again made her gain confidence. More so with the way he was reacting to it. The sound
of his breathing was drawing her crazy with desire. What she had done with him had her shaking
with desire for the man before her. Repeating the motions with her hands over his legs caused
Negan to slide down closer to her. Pushing his legs apart, she moved herself between them and
palmed in over Negan’s thighs.

Biting as his bottom lip, Negan stayed speechless when her right hand moved in over the center of
his pants to caress over his solid form beneath the material. The corner of his jaw flexed and he let
out a sharp breath. When Negan didn’t stop her or have a rebuttal, she continued to circle her palm
over his erection feeling the material tight against his rigid form.

Hungrily, she reached for his belt and pulled it apart. Biting at his bottom lip, Negan observed as
she got the material loose. When she was done with the belt, the button and the zipper on his pants
were quickly opened. Enthusiastically reaching her hand beneath his boxer briefs, her palm
wrapped around his cock and released him to the cool air of the room around them.

“I’d say the dance turned you on,” she licked at her lips looking over his solid erection that
twitched when she teased her fingers over the length of it. Loosely hooking her fingertips around
the shaft, she stroked carefully over his body and heard his breathing getting louder. Adjusting her
positioning, she got up on her knees and hooked her eyes with his while she continued to jerk him
off. Negan’s eyebrows wrinkled and his lips parted as her touch continued over him. Eating up
what she could with her eyes, Y/N took in the sight of his body. The impressive length of him had
her in awe of him and she was trying to imprint this in her mind. The sight alone would fuel her
heated dreams for nights to come. “I want you. I want you so bad it hurts.”

Lowering her upper half in over his lap, she flattened her tongue out over the tip of Negan’s cock,
tracing over the slit making him wince when she did it. Looking up at him with a wicked smirk, she
continued to pump her hand over girthy length.

The way Negan’s eyes were hooked on her fueled her as she traced her tongue over the length of
his shaft. Tracing the lines of his erection with her tongue made Negan shudder and she could tell
that she was at least doing something right. Firmly wrapping her palm around the base of it, she
started to slowly pump her hand over the lower half. Getting more comfortable on her knees, she
wrapped her lips around the swollen tip and Negan’s head dropped back against the couch. Taking
her time to lower her mouth down his body, she made sure to drag her tongue against his sensitive
flesh. Negan’s fingers hooked into her hair, grabbing a firm hold of it while she bobbed her head
over the first couple of inches. More than anything, she wanted to make sure that she was pleasing
Negan. With the sounds he was making, it sounded like she was doing a good job while he helped
her with the movements her mouth made over him. Pulling back with a wet sound, her tongue
twirled around the head of his cock and he arched his hips up toward her involuntarily.

“Does that feel good?” she purred against his body before pressing wet kisses over the length of it.
Stroking at the tip, she let her thumb tease over the slit again and again. Starting to stroke him with
a firmer grasp, she knew that acting this way was rather new for her, but it’s what she knew she
wanted. “I bet you can’t wait until you have it inside of me.”

“Actually…” Negan muttered unnervingly, tugging gently at her hair to get her to lean back on her
knees. Reaching for his pants, he pulled them pulled them back together and could hear the
disappointed sound she let out as he pushed himself back inside of his pants. It was obvious that
Negan was incredibly turned on and exceedingly worked up, but the look on his face was him
dissatisfied. “I told you that I wanted us to be something more than sex. I understand you don’t
want that, but I’m hoping I can change your mind on that because I fucking care about you.”

“Negan,” she frowned watching him stand up from the couch and it knocked her back a bit while
he pulled his pants together.

“Do you just want to fuck me? Is that what this is about? Or do you actually want to have some
kind of a relationship with me?” Negan demanded an answer while he stood a few feet away from
her. “If you just want to have sex with me and you’re just going to leave, then tell me now. I don’t
want to put my heart into this when you don’t want that. You made me believe you wanted more
than just sex with me, but then you tell me today you don’t want a relationship and you just want to
stick to our deal. So what is it? If you just want the money and you just want to spend time with
me, tell me that. Because when we involve sex, that’s making me believe you want more. I can’t
have someone fuck me only to leave again because that’s not what I wanted when I asked you to be
here. I was tired of being lonely…I don’t want to end up feeling worse because the person I wanted
didn’t want me.”

“Negan, I would never purposely hurt you,” she reasoned with him and Negan had a hard time
looking at her.

“Then you need to learn to respect me and only do this when I say we can do this,” Negan pointed
toward the door that was behind him and she let out a hesitant laugh. “I think it’s time you went
home.”

“Seriously? I thought you might want me to stay,” she felt awkward as Negan moved to pick up
her clothes to hand them to her where she was still on her knees. “Was it bad?”

“I asked for a dance, not a blowjob. If you want to only have the original deal we came up, then
you are going to have to start obeying and listening to me,” Negan grunted as he reached for his
back pocket to grab his wallet. Pulling out money, Negan lifted it up and could see the frustrated
look she gave him. “You’re the one that said you wanted to stick to what we were before. Did you
want something more money wise for the start of that blowjob?”

Snatching the money that he was holding, she started to get dressed and Negan watched her
expectantly from where he was standing before her, “You owe me that key to your house for when
I want to come here.”

“Okay,” Negan simply shrugged his shoulders and moved over toward his jacket that was hanging
over one of the chairs. After digging around, he pulled one of the keys off his key ring and held it
up for her. She snatched it from his fingers and there was no doubt that she was pissed off at him.
The smirk over Negan’s face made her frustrated as he followed her to the door. “Goodnight Y/N.”

Storming out of Negan’s house, she walked back across the street and to her home. Instead of
looking back to see if he was still watching her, she slammed the door shut behind her. She didn’t
care if her parents got pissed at her for slamming the door to their home. It wasn’t like they didn’t
fight constantly and slam things.

Heading into her bedroom, she locked the door behind her and wanted to avoid everything. As she
paced the space of her room, something caught her eye in the mirror and she realized she still had
the necklace on that Negan had given her. Not wanting her parents to see it, she cautiously took it
off and then put it in one of her drawers to keep it hidden. Although Negan had done so much and
so many things that were kind, she was pissed off and angry with him.

Digging into one of her drawers, she pulled out the box where she was hiding all the money that
Negan had given her. Depositing the money there, she quickly dropped the box back in the drawer
and pushed it shut. This was supposed to be a good deal for her, yet she found herself more
distraught about things than she was before this whole thing started with Negan. Why did she have
to want him as much as she did?

Leaning forward, she braced her hands against the dresser and started questioning things. Was
Negan dissatisfied with what she had done? Did he not like it? Was all this to get her to want him
more and agree to dating him? Either way, it had her hot, bothered and frustrated.

Maybe something was wrong with her. At the end of the day she just had the hottest man she had
ever laid eyes on asking her to be his girlfriend and she was being so indignant about everything.
Thinking about moments earlier, she realized that she still had the taste of Negan on her tongue.
Sighing heavily, she wondered what he was doing right then and there. For someone she didn’t
want to date, she sure as hell was thinking about him a lot.

Closing her eyes, she pressed her hand beneath the material of her pants to touch herself. More than
anything she wished that it was Negan that was touching her. The one time that he had touched her
was something she had often thought to herself about. No one made her feel like Negan did.
Caressing over her body, she pictured that it was Negan touching her. The image of his face in her
mind was incredible and she knew that it might be pathetic masturbating to the thought of Negan,
but she didn’t care.

Most of the night was hard because she couldn’t get her mind off Negan and by the time the sun
was up, she took a shower to try and get him off of her mind. It wasn’t working. If Negan was so
indignant about things, maybe she would just try to play everything the way he wanted it.

Getting dressed she headed over to Negan’s home and instead of letting him know that or even
ringing the doorbell, she let herself in with the key that he had given her the night before. Stepping
into the house, she made sure she was quiet when she closed the door behind her. Moving to
Negan’s bedroom, she pushed open the door and saw that Negan sleeping in the center of the bed.
The sheets were hanging low at his hips and he was shirtless. Her throat went dry staring at Negan
while his chest rose and fell heavily. It was easy to find herself staring at Negan. God, he was
stunning. The way his body was stretched out drew attention to his slender hips and the lines of his
long torso. Trying to break herself from staring, she knew that she was trying to be cold toward
him and this wasn’t working.

Purposely knocking something over, she watched Negan’s head lift up after being shocked awake.
When he saw that it was her before him, he let out a tense sound and lowered his head back into the
pillows.

“You okay?” Negan reached up to rub at his tired eyes. The way his muscles flexed in his chest
drew attention to the tattoos over his body and she found herself hot all over again. Lifting his head
up, he looked at the time and let out a tired breath. When she didn’t say anything, he lifted up on
his elbow and gave her an odd expression. “Did something happen? Are you alright?”

“I need money,” she declared and Negan tilted his head to the side and pointed to his pants that
were on the chair in the corner of the room. It was the only thing she could think of at the moment.
It seemed like a stupid reason to come into his house like this, but she had to come up with
something. “There is something I have to do.”

“Grab whatever you need,” Negan got comfortable in bed again and she shifted on her feet
uneasily. Just like that, he would let her grab anything that she wanted?

“I would feel more comfortable if you grabbed it for me so you don’t think I’m stealing from you,”
she muttered and Negan lifted his head back up. He was exceedingly tired and she could tell that he
was trying to get in as much sleep as he possibly could before he had to get up. Instead of bickering
with her, he sluggishly pulled himself up and threw his legs over the bed. An uncomfortable sound
escaped her throat when she realized Negan was naked when he pulled himself out from under the
sheets.

“How much do you need?” Negan moved over toward his pants and pulled the wallet out.
Lethargically moving before her, Negan opened his wallet and pulled out the money that was in
there. While she looked it over, Negan stretched out his long body and it drew her attention to it
even more. “You can have all of this if you want. I don’t care.”

“How much is there?” she looked at the wad of cash that he pulled out and he simply shrugged his
shoulders when he looked at it. “You’re not even going to ask me what it is for?”

Hell, she didn’t even know what it was for, but she was trying to be an asshole and dig in that he
was just money for her. Negan shook his head and yawned while he waited for her to grab the
money, “I trust whatever you need it for is important, so it’s yours.”

After he gave her the money, he sluggishly moved back to the bed to dramatically drop back down
on top of. He set his wallet on the nightstand and got comfortable again as she stood at the bottom
of the bed feeling suddenly ridiculous, “I don’t need this money Negan.”

“What?” Negan grumbled with his head buried against the pillows. His hair was ridiculously messy
as he lifted his head to look at her again.

“I don’t know what I was thinking in coming here. I don’t know what I was trying to prove, but I
was upset that you threw me out last night,” she informed him lowering her hand. Moving beside
the bed she dropped the money he gave her on the nightstand and stared down at him. “I’m sorry. I
just…I don’t like where we left things off. I’m sorry that I upset you, but I can’t…I can’t have you
angry with me. I like you too much to have things be the way they were last night. I was trying to
act tough to keep myself safe, but…I can’t when I’m around you. I’m wildly attracted to you and
I’m sorry for that, but I can’t keep having you mad at me.”

“I’m not mad at you,” Negan sighed sliding toward the center of the bed and he lifted the sheets
up. A confused sound fell from her throat as Negan pat the bed beside him. “I have to be up for
work in about an hour, but if you would like to lay with me until then…you can.”

“Are you sure?” she made sure he was okay with it and when he nodded; she kicked her shoes off
before carefully lowering herself on the bed. Hesitantly lying down in bed with him, she felt his
arm hooking around her waist and he pulled her close to him so he could rest with her in his arms.
“Negan?”

“Shhh…” he hushed her, nuzzling his nose against the back of her neck while he got comfortable
again. “Stop worrying so damn much. That’s the first thing you need to learn to do. You’re smart.
You’re beautiful. You have everything you could ever want and more. You just need to learn to
give yourself a break. You’re an amazing girl.”

Feeling her throat go dry, she felt overwhelmingly guilty when she heard the sounds of his
breathing alerting her to the fact that he was sleeping again. She was making everything more
complicated than it needed to be. Negan was perfect. Pushing him away was ridiculous. Negan was
right. She needed to learn to stop overthinking everything and hopefully she could break down the
wall that she had worked so hard to build over most of her life. It was just going to be hard after
years of trying to convince herself that this was what was right.
 Chapter 7
Chapter Summary

Negan teases Y/N with the idea of what it would be like if she decided she wanted to
date him, but she continues to remain stubborn. After something happens and Negan
steps up to help her, she realizes that maybe she's been looking at everything wrong.

Chapter Notes

I tried to update this one as fast as I could. I'm looking to try and work on a few other
things after this, but I'll do my best to keep this story updated. Thanks to those that are
reading and enjoying this story. I edited this yesterday, but it was really late and as you
can see I've been up all night working on getting this up. So if there are any grammar
issues, etc. I will attempt to catch them and fix them. I was tired when trying to get this
up.

Gasping, Y/N felt the pressure of a body moving in over hers waking her up from her slumber.
Before she had time to respond, lips were crashing down over hers while the weight of the person
above her kept her trapped beneath them on the bed. Humming, the familiar taste filtered over her
and she moaned against the rough lips claiming hers. When the mouth pulled from hers, a satisfied
exhale fell from her lips and her eyes gradually fluttered to an open. That was certainly not a way
she was used to being woken up, but she rather liked it.

“Good morning beautiful,” Negan growled, his lips still close enough to hers that the warmth of his
breath caused a chill to run down her spine.

For the last few days she had been spending most of her time at Negan’s home. After she was
honest with him about not wanting things to be so negative between them, they had been spending
every evening and night together. Still, she stuck to her guns about not wanting to date him. Often
Negan would try to convince her otherwise, but he always did it in a charming way somehow. It
was never to pressure her, just to remind her of all the positives she could have in her life if she
wanted him as her boyfriend.

It was the start of the weekend, so she was surprised that Negan woke up so early, but she liked it.
They were under the warmth of his blankets. Shifting beneath him, she could feel that his hips
were resting between hers. With her sleeping there with him, Negan was no longer doing the whole
sleeping naked thing. Of course, he was obstinate about the whole no sex if they weren’t dating
thing. It was obvious they were both frustrating each other with being stubborn in their ways, but
getting to have dinner with Negan at the end of the day and sleep in his arms was worth it. Even if
it meant she didn’t get to be sexual with him. Waking up this comfortable was something she was
not used to and on certain days she would be gifted with something like this to wake up to.

“How are you this morning?” Negan questioned, his eyes narrowing while he stared down at her.
Adjusting his position, Negan made sure to keep his weight over her while he rest on his arms at
her sides that pinned her beneath him.

“Better now that I have you over me,” she flirted knowing she must have looked ridiculous just
being shocked awake from his kiss, but she didn’t care. Negan’s hair was a mess, yet she found
him remarkably appealing because a disheveled Negan was an absurdly handsome Negan. Always
Negan seemed to have an air of perfection to him. He was proud of his appearance. So when he
was a little messy, it captivated her. “What do I owe the pleasure of the kiss this morning?”

“I just wanted to be close to you,” Negan slurred, lowering his mouth again. Faintly, his lips
hovered over hers triggering a shuddering sound to escape her throat. Reaching up, her palms
pressed in over the center of Negan’s chest. Teasing her fingers through the hair on Negan’s chest,
a naughty smile pressed in over her lips when she thought about the position they were in. “You’re
fucking adorable, you know that?”

“And you are incredibly sexy,” she smirked, tracing her right hand up from his chest, over his neck
to tightly hook her fingers into his dark hair. Lifting up, she met his lips in another kiss. Being able
to kiss Negan was something she looked forward to. There were a lot of things she liked about
Negan, but his kiss was incredible. There were so many levels to being intimate with Negan. From
the soft strokes of his fingers over her face, to the slight grasp he would put on her throat when he
would get a bit more heated with her. It’s like he knew how to do everything to have her swooning
over him and he did it incredibly well.

“I was hoping I was adorable,” Negan chuckled against her lips when he managed to part from her
for a moment to catch his breath.

“You are pretty adorable too,” she assured him, her nose wrinkling when Negan’s deep laughter
fell from his throat. Bracing his weight, Negan brushed his fingers through her hair. God, the way
he looked at her made her feel like the only woman in the world. With his eyes on her like that, it
always made her heart flutter. It was an amazing feeling and she didn’t know why Negan wanted
her so badly. So many women would kill to have a man like him in their lives. “You’re perfect.”

“Nu-uh,” Negan shook his head, a smirk pulling at the corners of his lips. A loud sigh fell from his
lips and he made a very dramatic expression that followed. “If I was perfect, you would want to
date me. Yet, here we are.”

“There is a problem with me Negan, not you,” she corrected him with a frown and stroked her
fingers through his dark hair. The man was relentless about the whole girlfriend thing, but she
didn’t care. It actually felt nice to know that someone like Negan wanted her as much as he did.
Maybe it was cruel of her to keep denying him like she was. There just had to be a sign that being
with Negan was a good thing. And she wasn’t sure there was anything to prove that to her yet.
Sure, she did like the way she felt around him, but after a life of wanting one thing and only one
thing she needed to have something big happen to show she was willing to budge on her plan. “You
really are flawless.”

“I am a good catch you know. I’m handsome. I have a nice smile. I really like animals. I’m good
with people and I’m outrageously charming,” Negan tried to sell her on all the good things about
him and his expressions while he was listing things off caused her to begin to giggle. Negan’s head
bobbed as he continued on with things and a cheesy smile was over his handsome features, “I’m
really good with kids. I’m a good cook; you’ll always have a good meal. When you’re with me, I
guarantee you are always going to have someone to support you. Someone who wants to help you
achieve everything you want in life.”

When he said that, she felt her chest ache. She believed him. Sliding her palm down the side of his
face, she watched him turn into her hand and press a soft kiss against the center of her palm. When
his attention returned to her, a cocky smirk flooded his features again, “Did I mention I’m really…
really handsome? I mean, you do love my dimples.”

“You may have said that already,” she snickered when he began to pepper playful kisses over her
jawline and she loosely hooked her arms around his shoulders. “To be fair about the dimples
though, who wouldn’t love your dimples? They are so fucking sexy.”

“I know, right?” he snorted, finding amusement in her response to him and she lightheartedly
swatted at his chest. “I kiss pretty well too.”

“Mmm…yes you do,” she used the element she had her arms wrapped around his shoulders to her
advantage. Lifting up, she met Negan’s mouth in a desperate kiss that drew her to let out a
surprised sound when Negan flicked his tongue against hers. Returning the gesture, she could feel
his body shifting again and it made her moan.

“I’m good with my tongue,” he slurred against her lips while she teasingly nibbled at his bottom
lip. “I like pleasing a woman. The best thing is hearing someone crying out your name. Having
them tugging at your hair and trembling.”

“Damn it Negan,” she felt her core heat up at just the suggestion of him teasing her like that.
“You’re being mean.”

“I’m not being mean, I’m just being honest. The idea of you screaming out my name just makes
my cock hard at the thought,” he groaned, nipping at her bottom lip and giving it a small tug. “You
already know I’m good with my fingers. Imagine if I used both my mouth and my fingers to make
you have the biggest orgasm you’ve ever had. Well, until we had sex at least.”

“You’re torturing me,” she whimpered, involuntarily rocking her hips up toward Negan and his
eyes slammed shut with the closeness of their bodies. If he was doing is best to fuck with her, she
was going to do the same to him. “Your fingers were incredibly nice though.”

“You liked them inside of you?” Negan grunted, sliding his hips up closer to her and softly bucked
up against her making her gasp when he did. The moderate rolling of his hips over hers made her
clutch tighter to him. With the friction of his body rubbing up against hers, she knew she wasn’t
going to be able to keep up their deal if this kept up.

“I loved them inside of me,” she muttered against his mouth when she managed to lift up enough to
capture his mouth in another wet kiss. Just from the skill of his mouth while he was kissing her
alone made her know that he wasn’t bullshitting with what he was saying. If he knew how to kiss
like this, she knew for a fact that he was likely good at going down on a woman. Their breaths
grew heavy while they fought each other for control of the kiss, but Negan ultimately won. His
right hand reached up to grasp at her jaw with his strong fingers and she cried out against his lips.
The kiss was rough, but so passionate and erotic at the same time. There was no doubt that Negan
was driving her crazy with desire. The thrusting of his hips against hers made her drop her head
back into the pillows, but Negan didn’t skip a beat. His mouth drew wet lines over her jaw and
down her neck where he also left tiny bites. “Negan…please.”

“Please what?” Negan growled against the side of her neck. He knew what she was asking for.
God, she was begging for it at this point. Her body was pins and needles. There was a hot liquid
warmth pooling at her core and the rubbing of Negan’s hardened body against hers was driving her
wild with desire. A grunt fell from Negan’s throat when she managed to use the strength she had to
roll him onto his back so she could crawl in over him. Bracing her hands over his chest steadily, the
entertained expression over Negan’s features drew her to be so much more aroused. Looking
between them, she could see the form of his solid cock through his boxer briefs and she anxiously
licked her lips. “You like what you see?”

“I’d like it better if you didn’t tease me relentlessly with it,” she reached for the tank top she was
wearing and pulled it unhurriedly up her body. Tossing the material aside, she could see that
Negan’s eyes were hooked on her bare breasts and she reached for his hands to lead them to her
body. The roughness of his palms felt incredible while he tested the fullness of them with his large
hands. Sliding in over Negan’s body, she rubbed herself meticulously against the shaft of his body.
Watching Negan’s head drop back, she knew that he was losing his own game. The vein at the side
of his neck was prominent and she seductively caressed over his long, slender torso. “Kiss me.”

“Yes ma’am,” Negan lifted up enough to be in a seated position with his arm hooked tightly around
her waist. When she thought Negan was about to kiss her, he pulled away with an amused breath
and lowered his head to brush wet, erotic kisses over her breasts. Tangling her fingers into his hair,
her soft pants filled the room when his lips surrounded one of her nipples. Gently, he sucked at the
taut flesh before twirling his tongue around the small bud. “So fucking beautiful…”

Her breathless cries filled the air until she felt Negan flip her over onto her back. His hands grabbed
a tight hold of her wrists to pin them down against the bed. The sound of his loud breaths told her
that he was trying to gather himself. Lifting her head, she could see that his body was straining
against the material of his boxer briefs. If he was going to play with her like that, she was going to
do it in return. It was a game he started, but quickly lost.

“I need a shower,” he scoffed, his dark stare connecting with hers as he pulled himself up to his
knees. Disappointment flooded her entire body as Negan stood up from the bed and he reached for
her tank top when he got to his feet. Holding it out for her, his right eyebrow arched up and he
cleared his throat uneasily. “You might want to put that back on.”

Accepting the shirt, she lifted up enough in the bed to put the tank top back on and Negan seemed
to quickly head for the bathroom while leaving the door partially opened. Dropping back
theatrically on the bed, she reached up to cover her eyes. Negan left her utterly yearning and
desperate for that contact they were having. The room was spinning around her and she was
attempting her best to calm her body down. Everything was hot. It probably didn’t help that her
heart was damn near pounding out of her chest.

Hearing the sound of her phone vibrating on Negan’s nightstand, she reached for it and saw that it
was her mother writing her again. Her parents had been texting and calling her a lot over the last
few days. They were probably confused as to why she completely just disappeared. At the end of
the day, Negan was just the person she would have rather been with. Likely, they needed her for
something and didn’t really care where she was, but instead of writing them back, she just set her
phone back down and let out a shuddering breath. Instead of worrying about what they needed, she
was just going to focus on what made her happy right now and that was Negan.

The sound of the shower had already started and she could see that there was steam filling the
bathroom. Attempting to count down from a hundred, she gave it her best to get Negan off of her
mind, but she couldn’t. Faint moans started to flood from the bathroom and her head turned toward
the bathroom. Sliding up on the bed, she at first thought she was picturing it. Hell, she was horny
enough to be doing that, but when they continued she knew that they were legit.

Getting up from the bed, she headed toward the half opened door to stand near it. Looking inside,
she could see behind the frosted glass that Negan was jerking off in the shower and she let out a
disappointed sound. Taking a moment to think about things, she found herself angry that Negan
would rather jerk off in the shower than have her take care of his erection for him. This deal they
had going sucked.
Cussing to herself, she pulled her tank top from her body and dropped it at her feet. Pushing her
fingers into her pajama bottoms and panties, she slid out of those. Moving to the shower, she pulled
open the door and saw Negan leaning against the wall. His right hand was pumping over his
erection while his left hand caressed over his slender abdomen. When Negan saw her, he dropped
his head back against the wall and let out a hiss.

“What are you doing?” Negan grunted, continuing to stroke at his aroused body that was visibly
eager for a release. His manhood was completely solid and aching in his grasp. Stepping into the
shower with him, she closed the door shut and her eyes were locked with his.

“Let me help you,” she begged, stepping in underneath the water and her palm pressed in over the
center of Negan’s chest. The flexing of his muscles beneath her fingertips drew her eyes to look
down at his cock as he released it. “You don’t have to do this alone…”

Lowering her hand, she attempted to grab him, but he stopped her before she could and nudged her
up against the wall of the shower. A big toothy grin pressed in over his lips as he looked down at
his cock that was twitching, eager to get some kind of release. God, it hurt, but he wasn’t going to
let her touch it, “See that’s something that is reserved for someone who is dating me…”

“Jesus fuck Negan,” she whined, so impatient to touch him and also get some kind of release
herself. “I’m hurting. You’re hurting…”

“I never said you couldn’t masturbate in my bed. Actually I’m very open to the idea of it,” Negan
retorted and it made her let out a distraught breath. “I made a rule and I’m keeping it. Until you are
my girlfriend, this is not for you. So if you would mind, could you please give me a few more
minutes to myself?”

“You did this on purpose. You left the door open, your moans were loud enough for me to hear and
you were facing the door. You knew I would want to come in here with you,” she accused him and
he dramatically shrugged his shoulders. Yep, he totally did it on purpose. “So for either one of us
to have an orgasm, we need to be dating?”

“Well, I’m about to have one, but you’re not going to be part of it,” Negan pointed toward the door
and she felt absurd wanting to whine about this.

But at the end of the day, they did have a deal. Grudgingly heading out of the shower, she could
almost hear Negan snicker as she left the shower. This was his way of punishing her for not
agreeing to be his girlfriend. Reaching for a towel, she sighed and wrapped it tightly around her
body. When she went to leave the bathroom, she looked over her shoulder to see that Negan was
now facing away from the door. If she stayed in there to even spy on him, she knew it would drive
her crazy so she left the bathroom and closed the door behind her.

Moving over toward his bed, she dropped down on it and closed her eyes. Picturing Negan
finishing in her head made her exceedingly hot. Even after trying to think about something else, all
she could imagine was Negan in the shower jerking himself off and she hated that he was the only
thing that she thought about. She usually got everything she wanted and Negan was the one thing
she had a horribly hard time with getting.

Lying in the center of his bed, she tried to convince herself to calm down. Breathing steadily, she
kept her eyes closed and attempted to get Negan out of her mind. When the sound of the bathroom
door opening was heard, she turned her head and her eyes slowly fluttered to an open. An
overwhelmed sound fell from her throat when she saw that Negan was still exceedingly wet and he
was wearing a towel that was very low at the front giving her long view of his torso.
“You okay?” Negan’s eyebrow arched while he stood at the bottom of the bed observing her. The
way he was looking her over while she laid on his bed showed that he was amused with what he
had done to her. He knew he was making her a mess with these rules, but he was pleased with the
way it was turning out to be. “You look a little flushed.”

“I mean this with the most love possible,” she began, slowly pulling herself up on his bed. His
eyebrows arched and he looked at her with curiosity when she took a moment to gather herself,
“but fuck off Negan.”

Immediately, his deep laughter filled the air and it made her smirk. Well, at least he thought she
was funny instead of being mad at her for that. The amusement he was showing to her response
made it obvious that he knew he was fucking with her and it was working. An impressed
expression flooded over his features when he finally stopped laughing. Nodding toward his dresser,
he started looking through some of his clothes before speaking up again, “So what are the plans for
today.”

“Well, I have to go meet up with that guy to get the video I convinced him to grab,” she informed
him knowing that she didn’t like the idea of driving back to school, but she was going to have to.
“After I have that, I know things will be smooth sailing with school.”

“I’ll take you,” Negan offered, pulling out the clothes he wanted to wear and he shrugged his
shoulders. “I have a friend that owns a bar out there by where you go to school. We can go where
you need, then go grab something to eat. Hang out in the city for a while.”

“You don’t have to do that. I imagine it would be a very boring day for you,” she waved her hand
in the air dismissively as Negan dropped his towel. Upon seeing Negan naked again, she felt her
cheeks flushing over and she cleared her throat again. It was like he didn’t even care about being
naked around her because he was still trying to torment her. Dropping her head, she tried to give
him privacy. Okay, truthfully, that wasn’t really for him. That was all for her. If she was about to
go do something for school, she needed to focus on that. Not Negan. Looking at Negan naked
would only get her flustered. When she heard the sound of his jeans jangling, she knew that she
would be safe enough to look up at him just catching as he pulled them up his body.

“As opposed to what I do every other day? It’s not like I have something important to get done
around here,” Negan grumbled when he turned to her, buckling his pants together. The movement
caught her eye as it made his long, slender torso stretch out. The v-line over his hips drove her to
lick her lips and she timidly shifted before him. “I actually think it would be nice for us to have
some time to do stuff together other than just be lazy around my house. It will be like an unofficial
date for us.”

“Are you sure you want to do that? I don’t want to force you into doing something,” she clutched
tightly to the towel on her body while Negan collected the shirt that he was going to wear.

“I’m the one that offered it. It’s not like you even asked me. So of course I’m sure,” Negan gave
her a wink before pulling his black, long sleeve shirt up his arms. Starting to slowly button it,
Negan looked her over and could see that her cheeks were still red. “You might want to take a
shower first, right?”

“Obviously,” she shot back knowing that she was likely going to take a very cold shower. One that
was so cold that it would help her body cool off from the aroused state that Negan had left her in.
Sighing, she hated that she was left feeling like this. There were nervous butterflies in her stomach
about going back to school to get something to help her case at the appeal, yet her mind was still
lingering on what she saw Negan doing in the shower. Moving across the room, Negan reached out
to trace his thumb over her jawline. Just the simple touch made her sigh and when the pad of his
thumb dragged out over her bottom lip, she knew without question she was a fool for Negan.
Negan gave her a wink and it made a lump grow in her throat.

“I’m going to get breakfast started for us, take your time,” his voice was almost mocking and she
knew that he was very much aware of the fact that he left her hot and bothered. Closing her eyes
when Negan bent down, she felt him pressing a lingering kiss over her temple before lifting up.
“I’ll see you in a few.”

Once she got into the shower, it was hard to focus. For fuck’s sake, it was the shower she had just
witnessed Negan jerking himself off in. Moments earlier, Negan had been in there touching himself
and she cussed out when she thought of it again. Setting the water to cold, she winced when it hit
her skin, but she couldn’t think sexual. She couldn’t be naughty in Negan’s shower, although, she
suspected her figured she might touch herself after what she witnessed with him. Pressing her
palms in over the side of the shower, she tried to focus. If something happened while she was
retrieving the security footage of her destroying her professor’s car, she wanted to be ready for it.
This was a big deal, so she wanted to be prepared for anything. The cold water felt like tiny
daggers when it hit her skin, but this time she was punishing herself for letting Negan do what he
did to her. They were playing a strange game with each other, but still, at the same time she hated
that she cared so very much about everything with Negan. It just wasn’t something she was used
to.

Life with Negan sounded amazing inside of her head. Living with him as of the last few days was
fantastic. No one made her feel like Negan did. And that wasn’t only with how she felt in a sexual
way. Yeah, she was physically attracted to Negan, but how he made her feel overall was
indescribable. He made her feel special. Like she was someone that deserved everything in the
world. He pampered her. He complimented her. The way he looked at her, no one had ever done
that before.

Nope, no. She couldn’t think like that. Thinking about how amazing life would be with Negan if
she was dating him was the last thing she should have been doing. Putting her life on hold and
changing everything to date Negan just wasn’t in the playing cards right now. This just had to be a
phase. That was what she had to convince herself. At the end of the day, this was just a business
deal. She was keeping Negan company and he was paying her for it. It was nothing more, it had to
be.

“Shit,” she cussed to herself after she repeated these things to herself like a mantra. If this was just
a business deal, then she wouldn’t have to constantly tell herself these things. Having Negan on her
mind all the time just made things so complicated.

After finishing her shower they ate breakfast and then left. The ride to the city she pictured before
they left would have been miserable. Hell, thinking about the meet up made her so stressed, but
with Negan joking with her and having her laughing, she was completely relaxed. Being able to
talk to someone who made her feel good was so bizarre. Hell, usually she hated long drives with
other people because she couldn’t stand other people long enough to be able to have long car rides
with them. It was different with Negan. He could always make her laugh and keep her feeling
comfortable.

By the time she met up with the student who had the tape, it wasn’t complicated at all. The guy
wanted nothing more from her. He just handed her an envelope and then left. For some reason she
pictured it would be harder than that. Yet, then again…it was strange how far being nice to
someone could go for you. Originally she had flirted with the guy to get what she wanted, but then
was just nice to him. It probably didn’t hurt that he hated the professor as well that she had fucked
up the car of, but it still stunned her that it was that easy.
When she got back to the car, Negan was humming a tune to himself while tapping his hands over
the steering wheel. Instead of him being in the distance he was right there to see everything. So,
when she was dazed he was visibly worried with what was wrong with her, “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, I just expected it to be harder than that,” she looked down at the envelope and carefully
opened it up. Dropping the tape in her hand, she surveyed it over and wrinkled her nose.

“That’s the tape? Fuck, I was expecting a hard drive or something. This school is archaic,” Negan
chuckled; pushing his sunglasses down to look at her with his scrutinizing glance of the tape she
was given. “Do you have a place we can watch it to make sure that it’s actually the right thing?”

“Yeah,” she instructed him to drive to a place where they could go. They walked through the
hallways of the school and she was holding onto his hand while she snuck into the room where AV
Club would have their meetings. Moving toward the back room where they kept the equipment,
she inserted the tape to get it to play. Negan outstretched his hand to rest it on something while
they watched the small screen. Fast forwarding through the tape, she found the spot in the parking
lot where she approached the car of her professor. “This is it.”

“Wait, let me see this,” Negan chewed his gum in an amused fashion. She didn’t really want Negan
to see how crazy she could get, but his eyes were focused on the screen. When he saw her start to
beat the shit out of the car, his eyes got wide and a rasp laugh fell from his throat. By the time she
had set the car on fire, Negan threw his arms up in the air in enthusiasm. “God, you have got some
fire in you and I fucking love it.”

“Yeah, we need to get the hell out of here,” she pulled the tape out and Negan clapped his hands
together before she tugged at his arm to get him to follow her through the hallways. Turning the
corner, she let out a panicky sound when she saw the professor in question walking down the
hallway. Grabbing Negan’s hand, she tugged him into the nearest ladies restroom and pushed him
toward one of the stalls to get him to hide with her. “That was him.”

“I didn’t get to see him. You moved so damn fast,” he responded, a sharp breath escaping his
throat when he felt her pressed up tightly against his body in the small stall. Adjusting his
positioning, he wrapped his arms loosely around her and sighed. “You know if someone comes in
here they are going to think we’re hooking up.”

“Better than running into Ray Schaefer,” she grunted knowing that she didn’t want to get caught by
her professor because that would certainly alert him to the fact that something was going down.

“Ray Schaefer?” He repeated the name and snorted when he thought about it. “The guy sounds like
a fucking loser just by his name.”

“Well he’s a fucking loser that could ruin my life,” she informed him with a nervous breath and
when Negan noticed that she was actually frightened, he lifted his hands to cup her face in them.
With his eyes hooked on hers, she felt him forcing her to keep her attention on him.

“Look at me, it’s going to be okay,” Negan promised her, nodding his head while urging her to
breathe in slow, drawn out breaths. “I’m here with you. I’m not going to let anything bad happen to
you. Do you understand me? I will protect you. With me, you will always be safe. Do you
understand? Don’t panic. We have the tape; you are going to be okay. We’ll wait it out and after
we’re sure he’s gone, we will go to my friend’s bar. Everything is going to be okay.”

Having Negan calm her down was everything. Before, she was on the verge of a panic attack. Now
with him trying to soothe her and keep her at ease, the panic attack was nowhere in sight. Lowering
her head, she rest it against the center of his chest. Being this close to Negan meant she got to hear
the steady beats of his heart against her ear. It was strong and was soothing to hear. In his arms,
everything felt like it would be okay and she loved that feeling.

The affectionate strokes of Negan’s fingers through her hair while he rest his chin over her head
made everything relaxed for her. No one had been able to relax her as easily as Negan could. He
took a high stress moment and was able to pull her off the edge.

“You okay?” Negan breathed after a few minutes of silence.

“I think so,” she nodded, knowing that they would have to leave the women’s restroom at some
point today.

“So what does this guy look like? I’ll sneak out there and see if I spot him. If I don’t see him, I’ll
knock on the door four times, okay?” Negan offered and she knew that it would probably get him
in trouble if someone saw him sneaking out of the women’s restroom at the school, but it wasn’t a
bad idea.

“Well, he has a round face. Maybe in his late forties. His hair is like a dirty blonde, maybe a light
brown and it’s graying at the temples. Big blue eyes,” she tried to offer up details of what he
looked like and she snapped her fingers when she thought of more details. “In the hallway he was
wearing blue jeans, a blue dress coat and a white shirt underneath the coat. Brown boots.”

“I kind of feel like we are super spies here,” Negan dropped his hands to playfully tickle at her
sides making her crack a smile. “First we break into a school to see this secret video that someone
just gives you in a parking lot. Then we are hiding from people. Now I’m being a secret agent out
on the lookout for some asshole. This turned out to be more fun than I thought. I also got to see you
kick some serious fucking ass out of that car. My day is honestly made.”

“Oh come on. You aren’t more impressed with me after seeing me go crazy on that car,” she rolled
her eyes and Negan kept her from moving away from him. His grip was rough, but not strong
enough to hurt her.

“I am absolutely impressed and applaud you for what you did. You don’t think I’ve done bad
things before when I was pissed off?” Negan retorted with a wrinkle of his nose. Throwing his
hands up in the air, he shrugged his shoulders and cleared his throat. “You were actually using my
favorite weapon of choice. When I was a kid, well, I can’t even say that. Through the years of me
being furious at people, my go to was always a baseball bat. It’s not something where someone is
going to think you are going to kill them, but it’s scary enough for them to think that you mean
fucking business. I’ve damaged some property in my life. I think it’s funny that you think I’m this
innocent fucking guy.”

“Well, I never said that you were innocent,” she grinned, struggling to think of something more
other than flirt with him because she was very obviously doing that. Still, she always pictured that
Negan was the type of guy to really start some shit if someone pissed him off. Rich or not, he
didn’t seem like the kind of guy that would put up with someone’s bullshit. “I just know that I am a
handful.”

“So am I,” Negan winked at her. That was his attempt at being funny to make her laugh. Of course,
he went to being sexual to try and make her laugh. “Now let me go see if I can find this asshole so
we can get the hell out of here and we don’t have to bond in a bathroom.”

“I don’t mind bonding in a bathroom with you. I also don’t mean that in a sexual way. This has
been nice Negan,” she whispered, stroking her fingers over the center of his chest finding herself
thankful to have him there in that moment. She was glad that he came with her. “I find myself
wondering what I would have done if you weren’t here with me right now.”

“Well, I’m glad I’m here so you could feel that way,” Negan dipped down to press a quick kiss
over her cheek before leaving the stall. Stepping out into the bathroom she waited once Negan left
the room to go scan the hallways. Minutes passed and when she heard a knock on the door four
times she knew that meant the coast was clear for them to leave. Speedily heading out, she felt
Negan grab a hold of her hand and lead her out toward where they parked when they got there.
Leading her toward her side of the car, Negan helped her get in before heading back to the driver’s
side of the car. When he got back in the car, she reached across to grab a firm hold of his face.
Pulling him into a kiss, she let it linger for a moment. When they parted, her breathing was labored
and Negan’s eyes were heavy with lust. “What was that for?”

“For being amazing,” she answered him with a sigh and he stayed there for a moment just staring
at her. Silence fell between the two of them until he started the car back up and then they drove to
the bar his friend owned. Before they went in, Negan led her toward the back of the bar and held
his hand out for her. “What?”

“Give me the tape,” he demanded and she thought twice before reaching inside of her pocket to
grab it for him. When she did, she wondered what he needed it for. That curiosity didn’t last long
when she gasped as he smashed the tape against the side of the building. When he did it the tape
shattered into pieces making her gasp. After he did that, he dropped it down on the ground and
stomped on it several times. Once it was broken into many pieces, Negan reached down to grab
some of the tape that was inside of it. Urging her to grab one end, he took the other and spun
around before tearing it in half with his hands multiple times. “Now, the one thing you have been
concerned about is no longer a problem for you because it no longer fucking exists.”

“So it’s gone?” she confirmed and Negan smiled widely.

“It’s gone,” he repeated her words and she found comfort in that. Negan reached down to pick up
the mess that he had created. What was left of the tape was now in his hands as he walked over
toward the dumpster and tossed the remainder of what was left inside. “So, now what are you
going to do with it gone?”

“The first thing that comes to mind?” she let out a long, shallow breath. Steadily moving across the
parking lot toward Negan, she wrapped her arms around him and enthusiastically hugged him. A
surprised sound fell from Negan’s throat when she hugged him. It wasn’t what he was expecting,
but he happily wrapped his arms around her and accepted the hug. “Thank you Negan.”

“Absolutely sweetheart,” Negan pressed a kiss over her head before squeezing her tighter in his
arms. Letting it linger for a little bit, she finally released him and they moved toward the entrance
of the bar. While they sat together at the table, Negan’s eyes seemed to be hooked on hers and it
was hard for him to pull his stare from her. Even when they placed their order, his eyes never
parted from her. “I really do care about you Y/N. You know that right?”

“I do,” she stretched out to place her hand over his and his free hand covered hers. It was his left
hand and it drew attention to the wedding ring that he was still wearing. Truthfully, she got why he
still had it on. It was obvious he loved his wife and getting rid of the ring was like letting go of her.
She had never loved something like that. Dramatically losing someone like that definitely would
change a person. Holding his late wife over his head just didn’t feel right. Most people would be
upset about the ring and while she didn’t feel comfortable with it, she had to understand that he
was still dealing with the loss. Everyone dealt with grief differently and that was one of the things
she needed to let go. The wedding ring many wouldn’t understand, but after getting to know
Negan…she finally did get it. “I really like you Negan.”
“I really like you too,” Negan stated with a sigh, reaching out to brush his thumb in over her
cheekbone. When the waitress came to give them their food and drinks, Negan was closing the
distance between the two of them in the seat at the booth they were at. It drew her breath to hitch in
her throat while he stroked at the side of her face. “You already know that though…”

“Do I?” her eyebrow perked up and when they were about the kiss she heard the sound of someone
clearing their throat. It made her lift her head and when she saw who was beside the table, it made
her immediately go pale.

“Look at who we have here. A face I never thought I would see again until I was forced to,”
Professor Schaefer was standing beside the table and immediately the world felt like it was
spinning around her. With her tensing up and locking up beside Negan, he knew this was
undoubtedly the person that they had avoided at the school. If the way she was acting didn’t give it
away, the way she described him in the bathroom earlier certainly did. She had it down pat and it
was clear this was the guy that had fucked with Y/N previously. “What do I owe the honor of
seeing you here?”

“What do you mean?” she stuttered her words, avoiding eye contact with the professor that had
tried to sexually pressure her into getting a good grade. “I was here first. So, shouldn’t I be the one
that is asking you that question?”

“If I remember correctly from your file, I don’t think you live out here Y/N,” Schaefer reminded
her, his eyebrows bouncing up while he stared down at her. God, the guy was arrogant. Just from
the weasely smile that he had over his face, Negan knew that he was up to no good. At that point
he hadn’t even acknowledged Negan was there with Y/N at the table. “So at this point you are
obviously out here for a reason."

“She’s with me,” Negan spoke up before Y/N could defend herself any further from this asshole
who noticeably had something out for the woman who had denied him the offer of sex for a good
grade. As a teacher himself, Negan could never begin to understand how someone in that kind of
position would want to harm someone for their benefit. When Negan became a teacher, it wasn’t
the best job in the world, but it was something that he did because he wanted to help people
achieve their dreams. Unfortunately, Negan couldn’t reach his dreams so he wanted to help others
be able to accomplish what he couldn’t. So to see an asshole like this that was so arrogant that was
turned down by a woman for not wanting to have sex with him pissed Negan off. “I’m sorry, what
is your reasoning in coming over here? Was it just to give this woman a hard time? You could have
just walked in here and ignored the fact that she was here, but instead you sought her out.”

“This is by the college I work at. I come here frequently after work and I shouldn’t have to interact
with someone who terrorized me for giving her a grade that she didn’t want,” Schaefer snorted and
Negan started to attempt to move from where he was, but Y/N grabbed a hold of his arm not
wanting him to get himself in trouble.

“Well, I still don’t get your fucking point because she’s not going anywhere,” Negan politely
moved her hand so he could stand up from the booth. Stepping before Schaefer, Negan wasn’t
about to back down from someone that was harassing a person that he cared for greatly. “My friend
owns this bar and if you have a problem with her being here with me, then you can find a new
place to go.”

“You see, that’s not how this works,” Schaefer retorted, taking a step closer toward Negan. It was
obvious this guy was a shit starter and he was attempting to start something with Negan. “You
know, I’m surprised to see her with someone like you. Is this a date?”

“That’s none of your business,” she scowled from the table knowing that she wanted to rip this guy
a new one, but if she still wanted to continue at her school, she would have to hold it together
enough. If she got in a fight with him, it would make her chances of getting back into school
harder. She felt like that’s what he was doing, trying to harass her so he had more reason to keep
her expelled from the school. Now with the tape missing, she had a guaranteed spot back into the
school if she had a good enough argument. If he was able to start shit, that was exactly what he was
going to use against her to get her to lose all chance of not being able to go back to school.

“I think it’s time for you to leave before you start any problems. Y/N doesn’t need the asshole that
tried to blackmail her into sex for good grades bothering her any further,” Negan pushed himself
between the two of them so that Schaefer could no longer intimidate her with his stare.

“That’s not what happened,” Schaefer immediately responded before a smirk pressed over his
features and his eyes met Y/N’s when he stepped to the side. “Well, at least there is no proof of
that. So good luck selling that sob story to anyone because no one is going to buy that shit when
they have the solid evidence that I do. Of course she would go around telling her sob story to
anyone who would listen though. Why am I not surprised?”

“You know, for someone who was terrorized by this girl apparently you sure are arrogant and
cocky. Most people would not want to be anywhere near the person that had frightened them for no
good reason. You actually are in fact acting like the abuser here in coming over here to mock and
torment her,” Negan pointed out the obvious, folding his arms out in front of his chest. When
Negan muttered those words, Schaefer’s jaw flexed and he looked away from Negan with an
uncomfortable movement. “Which I just have to ask, why is it you have to blackmail your good
students into having sex with you? Do you just have no game in real life that you have to force
women into sleeping with you? Is your penis really that small that you are so worried to actually
try to really get laid like a real man that you have to force people into fucking you?”

“Listen asshole,” Schaefer turned toward Negan and pointed out at Negan with his index finger.
Schaefer’s face had turned red and it was noticeable that he was embarrassed with what Negan had
said, “I don’t know who the hell you think you are…”

“Well I know who I’m not. I’m not some pathetic, small dicked, spineless jerkoff that can’t get laid
so he has to force his students into sex that they don’t want,” Negan continued to poke at
Schaefer’s ego and he could see that it was working. “It’s hard for me to picture someone that
pathetic, but look at you. Right here before me here you are.”

“You know I’m surprised to see her here with someone like you,” Schaefer stepped back to take a
breath, his brow line creasing as he looked between the two of them. “She played the good girl act
so much that I figured that’s what she was really going for. Yet here she is with someone who is
what…my own age? You are a little slut, huh?”

“Of for fuck’s sake, why don’t you just go jerk off your little baby penis in your car or something
because no one wants you here you fucking creep,” Negan noticed how uncomfortable Y/N was
getting. Getting close enough to Schaefer without touching him, Negan’s eyebrows furrowed and
he snorted.

“Get out of my fucking way,” Schaefer shoved into Negan’s chest making Negan stumble
backwards before a laugh escaped Negan’s throat.

“Sorry buddy, I’m not a younger girl that you can just threaten and blackmail to get what you want.
I’ll actually put up a fight because you hold nothing over me you fucking rapist,” Negan snarled
and a moment later felt the firm hit of a fist against the side of his face. Y/N’s gasp filled the air
when Negan stumbled and turned away from Schaefer for a few seconds after the hit. A deep
rumble of a laugh fell from Negan’s throat when his gaze lifted back up to Schaefer’s angry stare.
The man before Negan clearly expected a fight and Negan gave the man a big toothy grin. “Thank
you for hitting me first.”

“What?” Schaefer’s face scrunched up in confusion while Negan grabbed where he had just been
hit. Pointing toward the corner of the bar, it led Schaefer’s eyesight to where there was a camera
and Negan let out a long sigh.

“I didn’t touch you. I may have provoked you, but I never laid a hand on you. You hit me, it’s
caught on camera and I’m going to press charges. In fact right now, I’m going to get them to call
the police,” Negan waved on his friend that had caught the whole thing from the bar. As he headed
out from behind the bar, Negan could tell that there was an uncomfortable look in Schaefer’s eyes.
“Unless of course you leave right now and fuck off. Then…then maybe I’ll let you get by.”

“This is bullshit; I have every right to be here just as much as you do,” Schaefer argued and
Negan’s friend stepped in beside him, reaching out to grab a hold of Negan’s face to look it over
after he had been hit. “She has no right to be here…”

“As far as I’m concerned, you have no right to be here anymore. If I see your face at this bar again,
I’ll personally kick your ass out myself,” the man Negan waved on stepped forward before
Schaefer and pointed toward the door. “I’m personally going to make sure that all of my employees
know who the hell you are. If you show up here again, I’ll make sure they call the police.”

“This is fucked up,” Schaefer snapped and Negan’s friend took another step toward Schaefer
getting him to back up toward the door. “It’s not like it fucking matters. After the appeal, I
guarantee you are going to be denied and then I’ll never have to see your fucking face again.”

“Get out of here,” Negan waved his hand in the air in a mocking manner and when Schaefer left
the bar, Negan looked back at Y/N who looked ridiculously uncomfortable while she had herself
cornered into the back of the rounded booth they were at. “Are you okay?”

Instead of saying anything, Y/N simply nodded. Her face was on fire and she didn’t know what to
say. Fear was eating away at her and she was doing her best to keep it together. How did she end up
this lucky to have Schaefer walk into the same bar as her and Negan?

“You okay? Do you need me to get you some ice?” the man from the bar asked, grabbing a hold of
Negan’s jaw again to get another good look at it. Snickering, Negan reached up and urged his
friend’s fingers from his face. “I’ll just go get it.”

“Thanks Daryl,” Negan reached out to pat his friend on the shoulder before looking back toward
the table. Sliding in beside Y/N, he noticed that she was still pale. Grabbing a soft hold of her
shoulder in a supportive motion, he could see her shifting in the seat and he tried to get her to look
at him. “Hey?”

Before speaking up, she leaned over and wrapped her arms around Negan making him let out a
surprised sound. Accepting the hug, he stroked his fingers over the center of her back while he
nestled his jaw over the top of her head, “I’m getting a lot of hugs today and I really fucking like it.
I’m a big hugger, so this is fantastic.”

“Thank you,” she muttered in a whisper that was loud enough for Negan to hear and his fingers
lifted to caress them through her hair in a soothing way. “I can’t believe he was here. I didn’t think
he would even begin to show up to a place like this. It was far enough away from the school…”

“No, it’s my mistake. This is the closest bar to your college and I wasn’t thinking,” Negan hushed
her when his friend returned with a cloth full of ice for Negan’s jaw. “Thanks Daryl.”
“You alright honey?” the man that Negan was clearly friends with took a seat at the opposite end
of the booth. His worried eyes were hooked on Y/N and he placed his palms out in over the center
of the table that was before him. “Can I get you anything?”

“No, thank you. We already have our things,” she looked at the food and drinks that they hadn’t
even been able to touch yet. “I’m sorry, that’s just someone…”

“Who was obviously bothering you. Don’t worry about it, he’s not going to come back and if he
does we’ll take care of it,” Daryl promised with a wink while looking between Negan and Y/N. “I
guess I should introduce myself. The name is Daryl. Daryl Dixon.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you Daryl,” she watched him stand up from the booth and he reached his
hand out to her. Accepting it, she felt him firmly, but politely shake her hand. After telling him her
name, she watched Daryl eye over the both of them before smirking and nodding back toward the
bar.

“Just let me know if y’all need something, okay?” Daryl reached out to pat Negan on the shoulder
before leaving the two of them to themselves. When she looked to Negan he had the ice pressed
against his jaw and she found herself worried about Negan.

“I’m so sorry that he hit you,” she apologized for what happened knowing that it was partly her
fault for this whole thing going down. Reaching out, she grabbed a hold of his face to have him
turn toward her. Getting him to move the ice pack for a moment she could see that it was red and
she felt guilty he got hit.

“No, that was the plan sweetheart,” Negan hushed her, reaching up to grab her hand with his so he
could hook her fingers with his own. “I wanted to get him pissed off enough that he would want to
hit me. By hitting me and me not hitting him, it didn’t affect you and your chances with school. In
fact, it made him look worse. You could tell the board that he ended up punching someone you
were on a date with out of jealousy. I can get Daryl to give us the video to prove it. It didn’t look
good for him. Plus, with him hitting me, I had the higher ground. Keeping my hands to myself
meant that I had control of the situation. He hit my jaw, I have the short beard, and it’s easy to hide
at work. I’ll be fine.”

“Damn. That was really smart,” she was blown away by his answer not realizing that was where he
was going with everything. She just thought he was being protective. She didn’t know that he had a
plan to help her all along. “How did you know it was going to work?”

“Because I was attacking his manhood,” Negan snorted, shaking his head as spoke, “Men like that
who have no shame will be the first people to get angry when you attack their shortcomings. If
someone were to tell me I had a small penis, I’d just laugh in their face because I’m comfortable
enough in my sexuality. Someone who has to attack women, they aren’t confident. A blackmailer
does it to feel powerful. I knew by attacking someone like him verbally that he would snap.”

“Damn,” she thought about what he was saying before moving forward to grab a hold of his jaw to
pull him to her so she could kiss him. It was a forceful kiss and when her fingers hit a certain spot
on his face he winced, making her pull away with a worried glance.

“Don’t worry about it. Worth the pain to kiss you,” Negan assured her, leaning back into meet her
lips in a kiss that took her breath away. Knowing that he was being her hero and helping her blew
her mind. It had been multiple times today that he had helped her. No one had ever done something
like that for her and she was eager to show him how thankful she was. “I’m so sorry you had to go
through all of that.”
“You didn’t know,” she breathed against his mouth, her lips pulling from his long enough to look
around the bar to make sure that no one was watching them. “Don’t be super obvious.”

“Don’t be…?” Negan started only to feel her hands reach down to grab a hold of his belt. Tugging
at the material made him swallow down hard and he attempted to reach for her hands. “Hey no, I
don’t need that.”

“By stopping me, you’re going to make it obvious,” she warned him, managing to wiggle her
fingers enough to pluck open the button in pants. Cautiously pulling down the zipper in his pants,
she snaked her hand beneath the material of his pants to claim his masculinity in her hand. It made
Negan immediately tense up upon her touch and his eyes surveyed the bar anxiously. It made the
color drain from his face. “It’s okay…”

Nuzzling his nose against the side of her neck, Negan let out a tight breath when she managed to
pull him out of his pants and into her palm fully. Sluggishly raising his face, the tip of his nose
nudged hers and his breathing was hot against her flesh. The soft sweeping of her fingertips over
his sensitive flesh had chills running throughout his entire body making him bite back a moan,
“You’re giving me a hand job in a very busy bar full of people. Not exactly something I would
consider…okay.”

“As long as you keep yourself under control, no one will know. They are too busy with
themselves,” she advised him while she sheathed him in her palm. Caressing, palming and teasing
over his body was getting him hard which is exactly what she wanted. Biting teasingly at his
jawline, she felt him desperate to be close to her. His face was nudging against hers and his lips
were exceedingly close to hers. “You have to learn how to relax Negan.”

“I’ll finger you in public one day and see how you handle it,” Negan growled, his brow line
wrinkling. A muscle in his jaw twitched and he attempted to kiss her, but she pulled away with a
proud smile. Grunting, Negan looked down to see that he was completely solid after her hand
coaxed him there and he bit back a wince. “You’re a constant source of surprise, I tell you that.”

“And you are amazing,” her eyes were hooked on his, filled with adoration for the man that was
before her. Easing her hand over the length of his body, she eyed over the bar to make sure they
were still safe. “You have no idea how much I appreciate you doing what you just did.”

“I know you do, but you don’t have to do…this to show me that,” Negan claimed, a hitched breath
escaping his throat and he lowered his head to press a tender kiss over the side of her neck. Jerking
off Negan in public probably wasn’t the smartest idea, but it sure as hell made her hot. Watching
Negan attempting to hide his pleasure made it all the better. So badly he wanted to fall apart, but he
knew if he did it would draw attention to them at the corner of the crowded bar. “I thought we
agreed…no sexual things between us.”

“You don’t have much of a choice right now,” she noted knowing that she had pretty much thrown
this on him, “I think right now counts as a good exception to the rule. Don’t you?”

“I just…” Negan winced when her grip got stronger and he bit at his bottom lip, his forehead
pressing against hers. The strokes of her fingers over his flesh were driving him crazy, but he was
doing his best not to react more than he already was. “I don’t want you to think I did that for this.”

“I know what you did it for and this was my own decision,” she affirmed what he was saying and
licked at her lips in a seductive manner that made his eyes immediately fall to her lips. “Plus, I like
seeing you like this.”

“You’re a wicked woman,” he mused with a smirk, persuading her to kiss him when his fingers
hooked around the back of her neck. With his tongue flicking over hers, she felt a chill fill her
entire body. Negan’s body was pulsating in her in palm and badly she wanted to look down at what
she was doing, but she knew better. Every ridge and every vein was felt against her flesh and she
took her time admiring the way he felt. “I will get you back for this one day.”

“Maybe I’m getting you back for this morning,” she recounted their moment earlier where he had
teased her with the idea of him in the shower. “One might think this is payback for that, but
really…it’s just my way of thanking you. Then again, maybe it’s a little bit of both.”

“Fuck,” Negan’s panted, his face scrunching up and his head dropped back. The way his Adam’s
apple bounced in his throat drove her wild with desire. Everything was hot around her and she
really wished that they were in Negan’s home instead of being here. “You need to stop before I…”

“No,” she stressed that there was no plans in stopping and she watched Negan shudder at her more
determined caress over his length. “There’s no stopping.”

“It’s going to make a mess,” Negan swallowed down hard, his head looking down toward his lap
and he reached for his drink that was on the table. His hand was shaking as he brought the glass up
to his lips and took a large gulp of it. Tilting his head to the side, a cocky expression pressed in
over his lips and he licked at his bottom lip. “I’m not a dribbler Y/N if you catch what I’m trying to
tell you here.”

“We’ll deal with it,” she countered watching his eyelids get heavy and she slid in closer to him.
Getting close enough to whisper in his ear, she found amusement with this, but also found it
exceedingly sexy. “I love the way your big cock feels in my hand. It’s throbbing, you know that?”

Negan’s eyelashes fluttered and his eyes came to a close while she pumped her hand at the upper
part of his body, focusing on the sensitive tip. She noticed that he would shake when she touched
certain spots as he sucked at his bottom lip, “I feel it.”

There was a devious look in his eyes as she felt his hips start to arch up toward her caress and it
made her smile, “you want to cum, don’t you?”

A chuckle escaped Negan’s throat. His arm wrapped around her shoulders and caressed over her
shoulder in sweeping motion. Biting at his earlobe she felt his body tensing up beside her and she
quickened the motions of her hand over him.

Short, muted gasps were falling from Negan’s throat and she got excited when she felt Negan’s
cock start to twitch in her palm. Grabbing a handful of the bar napkins, she felt giddy at the idea of
what was happening while also making sure that no one else was paying attention to them.

“Fuck,” Negan winced, his eyes slamming shut and she felt his hips lifting up from the booth.
Every muscle in his body tensed up while she continued with her steady movements over the
length of his body. Placing her free hand just carefully enough in a way she felt the first line of his
cum hitting her palm. A whimper involuntarily escaped her throat with Negan leaning in to bite at
her jaw as she continued to stroke him while collecting his release in her other palm. The way
Negan’s body jolted was something he couldn’t control and she knew that. By the time he reached
the end of his release, her movements had slowed down to make sure she had gotten every last bit.
“Holy shit.”

“Good boy,” she praised him when he forcefully started to kiss her, his mouth sweeping over hers
again and again. Not wanting to move too much, she let him be in control of it until she pulled
away and nodded toward the napkins she had set aside. “You want to grab those for me?”
Breathless, Negan nodded while reaching for the bar napkins and he helped her clean the hand
beneath the table that she had collected his release in. Trying to keep things clean, Negan was
meticulous in cleaning that for her as he rolled up the napkins tight into his palm. Attempting to
grab a hold of her other hand that had some of his release over her fingers, he watched her pull
them away from him and swallowed down loud enough for her to hear.

Locked onto her movements with his eyes, he watched her lips part and she took her fingertips into
her mouth making him moan when she cleaned them off with her tongue. When he moaned, he
knew it was too loud and he swiftly pushed his still semi-erect cock back into his pants. Yet, his
eyes didn’t leave her while she cleaned her fingertips of him and hummed to herself when she did
it.

“Jesus Christ,” Negan found himself immediately aroused again with her doing that and that’s
when he knew he was in trouble. Claiming her mouth with his, his tongue pushed between her lips
and he could taste himself. Confidence reigned inside of her as she brushed her tongue back over
his while sucking softly at his lips. “You’re going to be the death of me, you know that?”

“I hope not,” she purred, sitting up straighter in her seat as Negan worked to not draw attention to
him while he pulled his pants back together. When he hooked his belt, she saw him look over his
shoulder toward where the restroom was and she smiled as he stood. “Where are you headed?”

“To throw this…away,” Negan lifted his hand and nodded toward the bathroom. His face was still
red and she could see that his legs were wobbly from the orgasm he just had, but damn she was
proud. “I’ll be right back.”

It took a few minutes for Negan to gather himself in the bathroom while she finally got to
appreciate the drink she had gotten herself long before Schaefer showed up. By the time that
Negan returned, he was still shaken, but very touchy. Yet, what they talked about wasn’t what just
happened. After they left the bar, she expected them to go home, but was surprised when he took
her to a hotel. Repeatedly she tried to ask him what he was doing, but he just got them a room and
as she followed him into it she wondered if this was going to be the night she got to sleep with
Negan.

Once they got into the room, she saw Negan head over toward the bed and he dropped back onto it
with a dramatic sigh. Standing at the edge of the bed, she stared down at him expectantly waiting
for him to tell her what they were doing, “What?”

“What is this Negan?” she inquired finding herself excited, but still unaware at the same time of
what was happening.

“Oh, I have plans for us in the morning. Ones I want to surprise you with,” Negan flashed her a
big, toothy grin and he pulled himself up into a seated position. His black button down was parted
and it made her throat go dry at the sight of his flesh exposed to her. Reaching for his wallet,
Negan pulled the money out and let out a yawn. “I’m whipped. I think I’m going to hit the
shower…”

“Oh?” she quipped, her eyebrow rising as he searched through the money and pulled out a twenty.
When he raised it toward her, she let out a nervous sound and shrugged her shoulders. “What is
this?”

“Why don’t you go get us a few drinks and some snacks from the vending machines while I get the
shower in?” Negan suggested and she grabbed a hold of the money. After putting the rest of his
money back away into his wallet, Negan rose up from the bed and stepped before her. Stroking his
fingers over her cheek, he gave her a smile and then headed toward the bathroom.
Shocked with the outcome, she found herself flabbergasted with the turn of events. What she
thought was Negan totally overcome with lust and desire was actually just really nothing this
whole time. When she heard the sound of the shower starting, she left the room after grabbing the
key and went to the vending machines.

When she got there she thought about what happened today. What they had gone through together.
No one had ever been that supportive of her or stood up for her like that. Tonight, Negan was her
partner in crime. He got rid of Schaefer and made it easier for her to win the appeal to get back into
school when he got the video from Daryl. Negan wasn’t liar. He told her that he would do anything
to help her future and he proved that tonight. He kept her safe. He was her hero tonight multiple
times. All sexual favors aside, there was something there between her and Negan. God, she was an
idiot to avoid that this whole time. No one had proved to her that they cared about her more than
Negan did tonight.

Once she collected the snacks and the drinks, she headed back for the room and could feel things
spinning around her. Everything was shaking when she realized what she was going to do. How
special Negan was…that wasn’t something she wanted to miss out on and let someone else have.
Dropping the items onto the bed, she headed for the bathroom and pushed open the door. Pulling
the glass door of the shower open, she watched Negan look back over his shoulder at her and he
chuckled.

“He’s not solid right now, I swear. I’m really just taking a shower,” Negan cocked his head to the
side while he pressed his fingers through his hair and slicked it back when he turned to her. “I felt a
little dirty after having my dick out in the bar tonight.”

Even with him teasing, she knew that she had to take advantage of the moment. Stepping into the
shower with Negan, she clutched tightly to him and pulled him to her. She didn’t care if she was
getting her only set of clothes wet; she needed to be near him. Stealing kiss after kiss from Negan,
she hooked her arms loosely around his shoulders and rest her forehead against his.

“I’ll date you,” she stammered making Negan’s eyes get big when she said it and he pulled his
head back. Clearly, he didn’t think he heard her right, but she nodded. “I want to date you. I want to
be your girlfriend.”

“You’re not fucking with me? This isn’t something you’re going to take back in the morning?”
Negan confirmed and she let out a laugh, shaking her head when he said that. “Why the change of
heart?”

“Because I realized how stupid I was for turning you away tonight. No one…no one has stood up
for me like that before and tried to calm me like you have,” she insisted with a frown knowing that
it was sad, but it was true. “You’re the perfect man and I would be stupid to let that slip through my
fingers. If you’ll still have me, I would be lucky to be your girlfriend.”

“Fuck, of course I’ll still have you,” Negan snorted, grabbing her and picking her up in his arms.
Walking out of the shower, he left it running, but he didn’t care. Setting her on top of the counter,
he continued to kiss her. Passion and excitement flooded through his veins hearing her say that. At
that moment, he couldn’t get enough of kissing her. “Bed or counter?”

“For what?” she snickered against his lips, but instead of giving her the option, he picked himself
and carried her over toward the bed to drop her down on top of it. The movement drew her to laugh
while he swiftly worked to get her pants down her legs. Allowing him to pull off the rest of her
clothes, she felt a nervousness build up in her body while he moved in over her on the bed. “Do
you need…a condom?”
“No sex, not right now. The big guy needs some downtime even if he thinks he doesn’t,” Negan
realized that their naked bodies were pressed together and it certainly likely didn’t seem like he
wasn’t ready to go for another round. Truthfully, he totally could have, but that’s not what he
wanted. Not right now.

“No sex?” she repeated his words, confused while she was lying naked beneath him if that was the
case.

“Well, not that kind of sex,” his nose wrinkled and he gave her a wickedly handsome smirk before
his mouth started pressing kisses down her neck, toward her collarbone and to her breasts. The soft
flicks his tongue had over her nipples while he teased them both already had her as a whimpering
mess beneath him. Hooking her fingers into his wet hair, she enjoyed him pampering her breasts
for that short time before his mouth lowered down her abdomen. “I think it’s time you saw just
how good my mouth truly is.”

Gasping, she felt Negan adjusting her just where he wanted her in the center of the bed. With his
arms hooked underneath her thighs, she felt her body shaking knowing that he was going to have
her the way he wanted her. When Negan lowered down she felt his warm mouth teasing wet kisses
over the inside of her thigh and it made her cry out. Soft nips followed and her hips were already
arching up toward him. There was no hiding she was ridiculously eager for the gift that he was
about to give her.

“You are so fucking stunning,” Negan mouthed against her flesh while he settled himself between
her thighs. Lifting his fingers, he teased a line down the length of her body and watched her hips
arch up in anticipation. “I’d be crazy not to want you to be mine.”

“I’m yours,” she assured him with a nod, lifting her head enough to see Negan teasing his fingers
over her body. The tip of his thumb circled over her clitoris making her cry out when he did it.
Watching Negan drag his tongue over his bottom lip had her already hot, but with the way he was
teasingly touching her was driving her wild too.

“Jesus, you have such a pretty little pussy don’t you?” Negan bluntly slurred as he tipped in to press
tender kisses over her flesh. A growl vibrated against her flesh, causing her to tremor, but Negan’s
hands kept her locked in where she was so she couldn’t move. Determined flicks of his tongue
circled her sensitive bundle of nerves before he gently sucked at her flesh. Flicking his tongue over
her body again and again, Negan took his time focusing on what she liked and what her body
reacted most to. Varying between nibbling, slurping, licking…Negan did his best to have her a
shaking mess beneath him. “Look at you.”

“Negan,” she whimpered his name while he circled his fingers over her entrance teasing her with
the idea of them entering her. Forcing herself to watch Negan, she could see that he was amused,
but God was he sexy. He knew that he had her in the palm of his hand and he was absolutely in
control. When his finger pressed inside of her at an agonizingly slow pace, it caused her to grasp
tightly to the bed sheets. His eyebrow arched up and his lips parted while he watched her reaction
to it. As he started to thrust his long digit inside of her, she found herself eager for more.
“Please…”

“Damn honey, you feel so fucking good,” Negan muttered pressing kisses against the inside of her
thigh again when he inserted another finger. It had been so long since she had been with someone
and she never remembered it being like this. “Fuck, you’re so fucking perfect.”

Mewling out, she threw her head back as Negan explored her body finding just the right areas to
caress and focus on while he pumped his fingers back and forth into her tight abyss. When he felt
like he got the right movement going, he lowered his mouth back to begin to focus on her clit
again. Working his tongue at the pace of his fingers inside of her led her to involuntarily reach
down to hook her fingers into Negan’s hair hoping to keep him where he was.

Tossing her head back, she felt her body shaking against him and Negan could pick up on the
signals that she was giving by her reactions and he didn’t slow down or falter. Tensing up, her hips
jolted against him and a rush of liquid warmth flooded her entire body when he got her to an
orgasm. Instead of stopping, he continued doing what he was doing through it and she found her
heart hammering inside of her chest.

Pulling his fingers from her body, Negan hooked his arms firmly underneath her to lift her up
further against him. Shaking his head side to side, Negan did zigzag lines over her body with his
talented tongue. The wet sounds he was making were filling the air while he continued to pleasure
her. Even after her reaching an orgasm, he wasn’t giving up. Stroke after talented stroke of his
wicked tongue had her a shaking and shuddering mess beneath him. Clutching tightly to his hair,
she could hear the sound of her heart hammering inside of her head and felt the blood rushing
throughout her body. Negan wasn’t giving up and she was already so sensitive.

The powerful strokes from his tongue had her in heaven while his wet mouth knew exactly what to
do to have her rocking against him and writhing against his movements. Sliding his palms up her
thighs and toward her hands, she felt their fingers hooking together and she squeezed tightly to
them. God, the sounds she must have made when she came for the second time had to be
ridiculous. Weakly dropping her head back, she swore her vision went for a minute as Negan
finished up, a moan falling from his own throat.

Crawling back over her, Negan felt her arms hooking around his shoulders and his mouth met hers,
surprising her with the taste of herself over his lips, “Was that good?”

“Was that good?” she repeated his question with an exasperated breath knowing that she could
hardly breathe at it was. “You know damn well that it was good.”

“I just like hearing it,” Negan chuckled out loud and eagerly kissed her again knowing that he had
her on cloud nine after what he did for her. Lowering himself in beside her, he stroked over her
face before drawing lines over her wet abdomen with his fingertips. “I like to hear that my
girlfriend enjoyed what I did.”

“Your girlfriend,” she weakly smiled and she reached for his fingers to bring them to her lips so she
could press kisses over them. “I’m blown away by how talented my boyfriend is.”

“Just you wait,” Negan winked sliding up enough to claim her mouth in another demanding kiss. “I
can’t wait to show you every day how good the decision you just made was. I promise you won’t
regret it.”
 Chapter 8
Chapter Summary

Waking up after her night with Negan, Y/N is eager to get closer to Negan during their
first official date as a couple.

Chapter Notes

I should have the next chapter up soon. Thanks for those that still read this. I'm sorry it
took so long to do. Life has been busy and I appreciate all those that still read this.

A jolt filled Y/N’s body when the slam of a door was heard and she lifted her head up from the
pillows to see that Negan was standing at the bottom of the bed. In one hand he had a tray with two
coffee cups in it, in the other was a bag and between his teeth was a small bag. When he noticed
that he had woken her up by kicking the door shut since he didn’t have any hands, he gave her a
sympathetic expression with his thick eyebrows.

Moving across the room, he set down what he had and then looked over his shoulder at her,
shooting her a big grin, “Sorry for that sweetheart. I didn’t have hands and underestimated the
power of the fucking kick. I apologize for the heart attack I may have given you.”

“No, it’s fine,” she assured him, reaching for the sheets that were loosely wrapped around her
body. Underneath them she was still naked from the night before. A smirk pulled at the corners of
her lips when she thought of what they had done together. For so long she was so desperate for
something more between her and Negan. Last night she had gotten a tiny taste of it and she was
hungry for more. “I guess I was just in a deep sleep.”

“Well, that’s not really your fault. I wore you out,” Negan moved across the hotel room and
lowered down onto the bed. Pulling himself toward the middle of the bed where she was, Negan
reached out with his right hand and drew her to him. “You are so fucking beautiful. You know
that?”

“Oh?” her eyebrow arched and Negan bit down on his bottom lip. His eyebrows bounced up, he bit
at his bottom lip and the warmth of his breath descended over her lips the closer he got to her. “I
think you’re ridiculously sexy.”

“I know,” Negan responded in an arrogant fashion, his head bobbing when he spoke leaving her to
laugh when her hand pressed in over the center of his chest. Negan pressed in closer to her, a
chuckle falling from his throat. Before she could say another word, he cupped her face delicately
with his rough palms and led her to his mouth. With Negan’s lips collecting hers, she found her
heart skipping a beat just at the electricity between them. Over and over again, he kissed her. First,
they were slow and teasing. With time, they grew harder and more desperate leaving her breathless
when he pulled away. “I brought you some breakfast.”

Brushing her hair out of her face with his fingertips, Negan took his time to look her over and he
smiled when he could see that her breathing was labored from his kisses alone, “You know, you
were so beautiful sleeping this morning that it was hard to get out of bed. I just enjoyed getting to
watch you sleep.”

“Why are you so perfect?” she blurt out and Negan’s eyebrows arched in response. With his
amusement she felt her cheeks flushing over. God, he always knew what to say to make her swoon
and be in absolute awe of him.

“I’m not,” Negan assured her, getting up from the bed. He moved for the bathroom to return with
the bathrobe that was inside. Urging her to get up, Negan waited for her, holding the robe up for
her. Smirking, she let go of the sheets and exposed her body to him again seeing Negan’s eyes
hooked on her. He was taking in all of her and appreciating her with his eyes. The way he looked at
her always made her hot. He didn’t have to say anything for her to get chills up and down her
spine. “Let’s get some food in you so you have energy for the day.”

“Oh? Am I going to need a lot of energy?” she poked and Negan’s right eyebrow rose as she
carefully pulled herself to the edge of the bed. Standing up to her feet, she stood before Negan and
could see his eyes lowering to steal a long, lingering glance over her nude body. “Whatever for?”

“That’s for me to know and you to eventually find out,” Negan teased her, his nose wrinkling as he
spoke. Shaking her head, she turned around and put her arms through the robe that Negan was
holding up for her. Before she could pull it together, Negan leaned forward depositing faint kisses
over her shoulder and toward her neck. “Waking up with you this morning is the happiest I’ve been
in a long time. With you being my girlfriend now and all…”

“Can you get any cuter?” she closed her eyes when Negan wrapped his arms around her and pulled
her securely to him. While she was so stubborn for so long about the whole dating thing with
Negan, she couldn’t keep denying him after what he did at the bar the night before. No one had
stood up for her like he had and she wanted to make sure that she didn’t lose him. There was that
chance if she kept denying him the offer of being his girlfriend that he eventually may get tired of
being around her and she didn’t want that to be an option.

“You think I’m cute?” Negan repeated with a teasing breath and he peppered the side of her neck
with kisses.

“You’re pretty damn cute,” she maintained while he laughed against the side of her neck before
pulling his arms from around her waist. Stepping back, he gave her the space to pull the robe
together and he headed over toward the small table in the corner of their hotel room. “Are you
going to tell me what your plans are for today…or?”

“Well, I want it to be a surprise and shit. Why would I tell you? That would ruin everything,
wouldn’t it?” Negan’s nose wrinkled while he pulled the items he got out of the bags. “Don’t you
like surprises? I feel like surprises make life fucking fun. You just like to be in control all the time,
don’t you?”

“Not all the time,” she stammered, lowering down in the seat across from Negan and he set her
food before her. Maybe that was a lie. She had gotten so used to being in control of things, she
almost forgot what it was like to have surprises thrown in her life. “Did you think I was hungry?”

“Well, I didn’t know what you would like so I got you donut, a croissant, oatmeal and a bagel. I
know how you take your coffee, so that was easy. You don’t have to eat all of it, I just wanted you
to have something that you would like,” Negan explained, his eyes anxious while he stared out at
her. “When I’m cooking for you at my home, it’s different. That food I know is good. Someone
else’s cooking…you never know. I’m sorry…this was fucking overkill wasn’t it? It’s just been a
long time since I’ve dated someone and I’m just…”

“Negan, it’s okay,” she hushed him, reaching out to grab a hold of his hand and with the simple
grasp of her fingers around his, it seemed to calm him down. “You don’t have to try so hard with
me. I like you, just the way you are. I would have liked you if you just brought me just coffee. This
is just adorable.”

“Now you’re the one calling me adorable. Should I be worried?” Negan’s eyebrow arched in
curiosity and she rolled her eyes at him. Taking a look at what Negan had brought her to eat, she
reached for one of the items before they went ahead with the day. “It’s going to be a busy day, so
just…be prepared for that.”

“What exactly do you have planned here?” she saw him wiggle his eyebrow and instead of giving
her an answer, he hurriedly scoffed down the breakfast he had gotten for himself. While she got
ready, he was outside in the hallway making a call and he was being very hush-hush about it.
When she gathered her things to leave the hotel, Negan was waiting for her already by the car
smoking a cigarette. “It was hard leaving this place.”

“Why?” Negan chuckled, a large amount of smoking escaping his lips when she stepped in closer
to him to wrap her arms loosely around his slender abdomen. With his free arm, Negan snaked it
around her shoulders and pulled her closer to him. Finishing off his cigarette, Negan made sure to
turn his head away from her when he released the smoke.

“Because of what happened in that bed last night,” she purred, tipping up on her toes to meet Negan
in a lengthy kiss that drew Negan to hum against her mouth. The taste of his menthol cigarette
lingered, but she didn’t mind it. “It taught me just how talented you were with your mouth.”

“You didn’t think I was talented with my mouth before?” Negan feigned being offended, bringing
his hand up to his chest after he tossed his finished cigarette. “I get it, you don’t like my kissing.”

“Oh stop, of course I like your kissing,” she clawed gently at the center of his chest and Negan
snorted. “I just meant it’s the place where we decided to actually date each other. It’s a special
place.”

“You are my special place,” Negan slurred, his eyes hooked on hers making a chill run down her
spine with the way he could make her feel just by looking at her. With Negan peppering faint
kisses over her lips, Y/N found herself melting in against his chest. “I’m just glad you didn’t
change your mind when you woke up this morning. There was that fear that you may take back
your decision in the back of my brain while I laid with you this morning.”

“You’re going to be the one that regrets asking me to be your girlfriend,” she swore knowing that
she was a pain in the ass from what people had told her growing up. Especially with how stubborn
she knew that she was. Negan hushed her and shook his head, a smirk pressing in over his lips that
drew attention to his dimples. “You’re going to hate me.”

“No, I won’t,” Negan rejected that opinion and hooked both of his arms around her shoulders to
pull her close to him so he could kiss her repeatedly. “I think you’re going to end up liking this
relationship more than you thought you would.”

“We’ll see,” she nibbled tenderly at his bottom lip making him growl when she did it. A gasp fell
from her throat feeling Negan’s arms sliding down her body where he friskily squeezed at her
bottom. “When does our busy day start?”

“Immediately?” Negan released her from his arms and led her around to the other side of his car to
help her in. When he got in the car, he was kind of quiet as he drove her where he had planned for
them. When he pulled into an indoor-outdoor amusement park, she looked to him with a confused
expression. “What?”

“Is this where you are taking me?” she half-laughed noticing that the parking lot was empty except
for a few cars. “I think, I think it’s closed Negan.”

“Really? Well, I think we should still check,” Negan got out of the car and moved around it to
reach for her hand when he pulled open her door. Negan helped her out and led her toward the
center of the park after moving one of the gates aside. It made her nervous that Negan was clearly
breaking into the place and she was going to fight him on it until she saw that there were
employees already inside waiting for them. “So, what do you want to do first? Outside they have a
drop tower, a spinning coaster, batting cages…although I will tell you ahead of time, I will kick
your ass in that if we have a head off. There’s bumper boats, go-karts, mini golf, rock climbing…”

“Negan…?” she saw that he was rambling and his attention was pulled to her. “Did you seriously
rent out this whole place just for the two of us?”

“Well, yes and no. Usually they open around two, but they are going to open later so you and I can
hang out for a while because we have somewhere else to be around five. So, we will be here most
of the day, get something to eat here and by the time we leave they will open it for the public,”
Negan explained watching the way her eyebrows arched when he explained to her what they were
doing. “What? I know the guy that owns the place and I wanted us to have fun together. No
interruptions.”

“You know, I wouldn’t have minded the two of us being around people,” she informed him, her
right eyebrow arching as Negan’s nose wrinkled. “You don’t have to do things like this to impress
me. You don’t have to spend this kind of money on me.”

“Well, the guy is my friend that owns the place and he owes me…so it’s not that big of a deal,”
Negan explained, loosely wrapping his arm around her shoulders. “If you would rather go inside
first, they have an arcade, bowling, laser tag…”

“Where do you want to go first?” she saw Negan looking around the area they were in and he
shrugged his shoulders. Looking around her shoulder, she saw that they were closest to one of the
go-karts tracks and she pointed in that direction. “How about we go there first?”

“Sounds good to me,” Negan followed her in that direction and she looked over at him with a
smirk. “What?”

“This is just not what I was expecting. A place to go and have some fun. I pictured maybe you
were going to take me to some kind of art exhibit in the center city or something,” she muttered
hearing Negan grunt when she said that and he shook his head. “You’re not the typical rich person
Negan. I like that. You’re nothing like what I first expected.”

“There is nothing wrong with art exhibits or museums if that’s what you like. If you do like those, I
will have no problem taking you to that kind of shit, but deep down I’m a fucking kid at heart. I
like to have fun. I like to play games,” Negan rambled, waving his free hand in the air while his
other arm was still firmly wrapped around her shoulders. “Also, after talking with Sam about
everything we came to the conclusion that you probably needed to have some fun too.”

“So, you’re still talking about me to Sam?” she confirmed, wrapping her arm around his waist
hearing the deep rumble of a chuckle escape his throat. It was good to hear that Negan was still
talking to his niece about her. That way at least she knew that he remained interested in her. Having
Sam know about her meant that she had a sturdy place in his life. “And the two of you came up
with this date together?”

“Maybe,” Negan responded with a wink, connecting eyes with her again. Reaching up, she hooked
her fingers with his as they approached the employee that was waiting for them by the track. “I’m
sure you’ve done something like this before?”

“I’m uptight Negan, not a total bore,” she poked him firmly in the ribs making Negan laugh when
she did it. When they got to the track the employee got them set up in their own karts. One of the
employees was in the distance setting up their track and the other employee was about to leave, but
Negan whistled for him to come back.

“Yes sir?” the young guy stared out at Negan with big eyes and Negan nodded to the go-kart that
right behind him.

“Why don’t you join us?” Negan offered seeing the excitement that flooded into the boy’s face at
the suggestion, but almost immediately he shook his head.

“We can’t do that sir, I’m sorry,” the employee immediately apologized and Negan rolled his eyes
upon hearing the rules.

“Well, I’m paying to be here and I want you to do this with us. So why don’t you get your skinny
ass in one of those go-karts and just have some fun for a few minutes. I’m paying for it,” Negan
pointed out, giving the worker that was visibly still a teenager a wink. For a moment the kid
thought about it before quickly moving to the go-kart that Negan had pointed to. When Negan
looked over his shoulder at Y/N he could see that she was staring out at him with a smile. “What?”

“You just are something else,” she was actually impressed that he would have done something like
that. It wasn’t that big of a deal but looking back over her shoulder at the teen that was setting up
the go-kart behind them, it was clear that he was excited to get to be joining people this time.

When the green light switched to alert them to start driving, Y/N slammed down on the gas to get
her kart to go. There was no hiding that she liked to win and when it came to things like this, she
was going to do her best to win. For the first few laps, she didn’t even bother to look back to see
how far behind Negan was because she had her eye on the goal and that was to beat him.

A frustrated grunt fell from her lips when she saw Negan pull ahead of her in his go-kart and he
looked back over his shoulder at her with an arrogant smile. No matter how much she tried to catch
up with Negan who was pretty well ahead of her, she couldn’t do it. As they reached the final lap,
she noticed that suddenly Negan’s kart slowed down and she passed him to finish off the race.
When she pulled to the side, she noticed that Negan even had the employee finish before him as he
pulled his go-kart into position to finish up.

“What the hell was that?” she pulled her seatbelt off and got out of her go-kart. Walking over to
Negan’s she could see the amused expression that was over the young employees features when
she approached Negan like that. “Why did you let me win?”

“I didn’t,” Negan made a dramatic expression, pulling his seatbelt from his body. With a strained
breath, he stretched out his long legs and managed to stand up from the go-kart. Reaching for his
leg, Negan gave it a wiggle and shrugged his shoulders. “My leg locked up.”

“Bullshit,” she grunted when his thick eyebrows arched showing he was entertained with her.
Reaching out, she weakly hit him on the chest making a laugh erupt from his throat. There was no
hiding that he was lying. Obviously, he had let her win and she hated that. While she didn’t like
losing, she hated winning because someone just let her win. “I’m not one of those girls that needs
you to let me win. I want us to be fair. I want us to be equal.”

“Okay, okay. Noted,” Negan held his hands up in the air, his facial expression showing that he was
amused that she got so upset with him for it.

“So, you did let me win?” she poked further seeing Negan’s face twisting with discomfort as she
reached out to hit him in the chest again. “Don’t do that Negan.”

“Well, you did just start dating me and I thought kicking your ass so badly was probably not a
good thing to do,” Negan snorted as she wrestled with him a bit and they both ended up laughing
while the employee still watched them from the side of the track. “I’m sorry, I won’t do it again. I
promise.”

“Good, you better not,” she tipped up on her toes to meet his lips in a rough kiss that left him
growling against her lips. Nipping at his bottom lip, she tugged somewhat at the flesh and saw his
eyes heavy with lust when she pulled away from him. “Now, I’m voting for miniature golf. That’s
something I actually know I can probably kick your ass in.”

“Alright,” Negan went to follow her off the track, but stopped to talk to the kid that had driven with
them. She watched Negan reach inside of his pocket to pull out his wallet. Opening it up, Negan
gave the kid a bill for him and the other employee that was working there. When Negan swiftly
made his way back, she was impressed with how he was treating these people. “I have to be honest
with you, my back is kind of shit and I’m not really good at this whole mini golf thing.”

“Stop letting me win things,” she got the putter that she liked and a silly designed golf-ball for
herself while Negan grabbed something a little more fitting for his height. “If you let me win this
time, I’m going to beat you with this putter.”

“No, I’m serious. Like, I’m really good at sports, but I’ve never been good at this shit. Sam always
kicks my ass when we do this,” Negan followed her toward the first course and when she went to
have him go first, he immediately shook his head. “Nah, you go first. I’m fucking serious. I’m
really bad at this.”

Instead of bickering with him, she did her first stroke and was able to get pretty close to the hole.
Negan let out a groan when it was his turn. Originally, she thought he was kidding, but his
nervousness to actually do it proved to her that he was uncomfortable making an ass of himself. It
was hard to imagine Negan being bad at anything. Negan took a long time lining up the shot and
she found herself amused with how much he was trying to think it out, “Negan? We’re going to be
a year older by the time you take this shot.”

“Fuck! Okay, I just…I have to think this shit out,” Negan hit the ball and she watched it roll down
the course before hitting off the back wall. The ball sank immediately into the hole and Negan
threw his arms up in the air in celebration. Glaring back at Negan, he let out a boastful laugh. Part
of her wanted to believe he was just fucking with her and that he really was good at this, but his
excitement for getting a hole in one seemed genuine. “I swear to God, this never happens.”

“Right,” she chuckled going to get her ball after she sank her ball with her second stroke. Course
after course, even though Negan claimed he was terrible he seemed to be doing really well and she
felt like he was trying to fool her about being bad. When they got to the final hole, Negan was
winning by quite a bit. “I swear if you lie to me one more time tonight…”

“I wasn’t lying to you. I swear. I can call Sam right now and she will tell you how much I suck,”
Negan pointed toward his pants where he had his phone in his right pocket. “I’m serious Y/N. It
must be you that’s my good luck charm.”

“Yeah, okay,” she rolled her eyes looking at the final hole that they had to do. There was a
swinging piece of wood over the hole and quite a few hills along with twists on the mini course.
Measuring it out, she took her first swing and was happy she was able to get it a decent amount
down the course. When it was Negan’s turn to hit the ball, she let out an amused sound when he hit
it too hard and it hit the wall making it bounce back at him. “Don’t purposely try to lose now.”

“I’m not,” Negan grumbled going where the ball landed and he hit it, letting out a grunt when he
got his ball near hers with the second hit. They went back and forth until she got her ball in and
waited for Negan to finish. In order for her to win Negan had to mess up, bad. Watching Negan
line up the shot drew attention to the very serious expression he was making. His face was
scrunched up, his dark eyes focused solely on the hole while he adjusted his positioning. “Come on
Smith.”

“Yeah, come on Smith,” she harassed him from the side of the course and Negan lifted his eyes up
to give her a glare. Repeatedly Negan kept hitting the ball, but the swinging piece of wood would
always hit Negan’s ball away from the hole before he could sink it. Yeah, it was probably amusing
her more than it should have been. It was just hard not to laugh after Negan had gotten so cocky
from the previous holes. That confidence had quickly faded and now because of his frustrations,
his emotions were more so aggravation. “Focus Negan.”

“I’m trying,” he muttered, trying to hit the ball one more time, but it caused the ball to bounce
firmly from the wood that was swinging over the hole. An irritated breath fell from Negan’s throat
when he moved over toward the golf ball again. “We’re going to be here all fucking day if I don’t
just give up.”

“Just keep going,” she tried to encourage him, watching him line up the shot and this time it was
obvious he was letting his anger get the best of him because he hit the golf ball so hard that it
bounced from the swinging piece of wood and flew off the course into the pond that was beside
them. Throwing his putter down, Negan looked over at her with a frustrated glance making her
laugh out loud. “Okay, so you do suck at some of these.”

“I fucking told you. I just can’t,” Negan started giggling when he thought about what just happened
and he raised his hands to rub at his eyes. “I was actually impressed with myself until this hole.
Now, I just…I fucking suck at this. I think I need a cigarette. This stressed me the hell out.”

“No baby, it’s fine. It just shows you aren’t perfect at everything,” she tormented him, stepping
forward to cup his face in her hands. The frown he gave her made her want to pick on him a little
bit more, but she knew it was cruel. Especially after that performance. Grabbing his hand, she led
him off the miniature golf course. They turned in their putters before she took him toward the
batting cages, remembering that Negan had told her in the past he was close to becoming a
professional baseball player. “Now is the time to bring up that ego of yours, show me what you’ve
got. I don’t want to go up against you, I want to see how talented you are.”

“Okay,” Negan looked to her as she handed him one of the bats that they had hanging there.
Getting into the cage, Negan set up the machine before getting into position. Standing by the
fence, she watched as Negan reared up and as soon as the first ball was released, she heard the
booming sound of when Negan hit the baseball across the cage. The sound echoed when it collided
with the fencing at the back of cage. Over and over again Negan repeated each hit with such
expertise, surprising her how good he actually was. When Negan talked about potentially being a
baseball player when he was younger, she really thought that it was just his arrogance talking, but
he really was that good. When he finished, Negan turned to her and shrugged his shoulders.
“Thoughts?”

“Just…wow,” she reacted as Negan set the bat back where it belonged when he moved out of the
cages. It didn’t even break a sweat for him and she was surprised by that. He had it on a very fast
pitch and he took it with ease, but a miniature golf course had him super upset. “I hate to admit it,
but that kind of turned me on.”

“Oh?” he snickered, moving forward to wrap his arms around her waist to pull her in closer to him.
Teasing his lips over hers, he let them hover just enough so they wouldn’t actually touch hers.
“You like seeing how strong I am, huh?”

“I do,” she declared, reaching up to press her hands in over the center of his chest. Unhurriedly, her
hands slid up from his chest and toward his shoulders. A whine fell from her throat when she
attempted to kiss him, but he pulled away from her. “You’re stronger than you look.”

When she leaned up to try to bring their lips together, Negan pulled just enough back to keep them
from kissing with a wicked smirk. Damn he was frustrating her with playing like that. Sinking her
fingers into his hair, she yanked him in closer to her and heard his amusement when her lips finally
collided with his. Each talented caress of his lips over hers drew chills down her spine and she
found herself eager to continue to kiss him. Parting her lips, she allowed his tongue to flick against
hers. Melting in against him, she knew that she could get lost in this, but Negan was quick to pull
away.

“We have a long day ahead of us baby girl,” Negan slurred, depositing a final faint kiss over her
lips before leading her toward other areas of the park.

Anything pretty much from there on out that they did that was athletic or needed physical strength,
Negan was of course fantastic at it. Those were the kind of things that Negan excelled at. But when
she took him on the rides they had, he didn’t seem to handle the spinning as well as she could.

“I think…I think I need to pull out the old man card on that last one,” Negan waved his hand in the
air after they got off the ride they had. His hand slid in over his abdomen and he let out a long,
steady breath where his eyebrows tensed together. “My stomach said it needs a moment to come
back down to reality. The constant spinning just gets me…”

“You’re good,” she watched him dramatically drop down to a bench, drop his head back and throw
his arm over his eyes. Moving in beside him, she reached out to rub over the center of his abdomen
hearing him groan. “I think we’ve hit up most of what is out here. We can head inside if you want.”

“We can do that, I’m just catching my breath so I don’t throw up all over the fucking place and ruin
our first official date,” Negan grumbled, an uncertain laugh falling from his throat. “That would be
an awful way to do things considering we are nowhere near the end of this date.”

“I think if that happened, I would be mature enough to understand,” she nudged him with her
elbow, getting more comfortable on the bench beside him. “Not only that, you wouldn’t have
ended this date horrible. If the date were to end right now, I’ve really liked it. We’re having fun.
You rented out a whole fucking entertainment amusement park thing for us. You have impressed
me all around and the fact it isn’t even over says a lot to me. No one has ever gone out of their way
for me like you have.”

“Oh honey,” Negan pulled his arm from his eyes and he shook his head. “You deserve so much
more than this. What you deserve is a life of someone pampering you. Telling you how amazing
you are. How beautiful you are…”
With Negan reaching out to touch her jaw with his rough fingertips to get her to meet his eyes, she
felt her breath getting hitched in her throat, “This is barely even scratching the surface of all the
things I will do for you if this relationship lasts. You deserved to be treated like the amazing, young
woman you are all along.”

“How could I reconsider being with you when you say all the right things?” she leaned in closer to
him to kiss him again, enjoying the caress of his rough lips over hers. The coarseness of his short
beard tickled at her flesh while her fingers hooked around the back of his neck. Kissing Negan may
have been one of her favorite things. Maybe they were doing it too much out in public right now,
but she didn’t care. Being able to kiss him meant that he was hers. It also helped that he was
exceedingly good at it. When Negan pulled his lips from hers, she lifted her hand to stroke over the
left side of his face and the way Negan was looking at her sent goosebumps down her arms. “You
are remarkable.”

“So…” Negan brushed his fingers through her hair, still close enough that the warmth of his breath
etched over her lips. “I can tell Sam that we came up with a decent idea then? You liked being
here?”

“Yeah, you can tell Sam that this was a success,” she chuckled making Negan smile brightly when
she said it. Thinking about Sam’s niece actually made her sigh knowing that she actually had a lot
of fun when she was with the two of them. “I’ve had a good time with you Negan, but honestly…I
think we need to come back here with Sam one day. Something tells me I would enjoy it all the
more.”

“I think she’d like that,” Negan bit at his bottom lip and sighed heavily. Nodding toward the
building, Negan reached for her hand and slowly rose to his feet. “Let’s go check out what is
inside. We can do a few more things, but we’re going to have to leave by a certain time. Our next
thing on the list we can’t be late to.”

“Yes sir,” her fingers hooked with his while she followed him inside of the building. The contrast
of the cool air as opposed to the heat they had been out in the last few hours was vastly different. It
drew a chill to fill her body and Negan took notice of it. “Come here baby.”

Moving in behind her, Negan wrapped her up in his arms and pulled her closer to him so the heat
of his body could warm her up, “So, it’s not a turn off that I’m still kind of a kid at heart?”

“No, in fact I think it works for me. I spend too much of my time taking things so seriously and
being an adult all the time that I think I need someone in my life like you,” she informed him,
wrapping her fingers around his arms. Being wrapped up in his arms was the most incredible thing
that she could ask for. It was a place she felt safe. Somewhere she felt comfortable. It was
something she couldn’t ever recall feeling in her whole life. “It helps me realize there is more to
life. I needed that. I need someone to wake me up.”

“I’m not here to wake you up, I’m just here to make your life better and support you through thick
and thin,” Negan hummed against the side of her neck when he deposited a faint kiss over the side
of her neck. Leaning into him, she felt like she was dreaming. Negan was too good to be true. It
was like she fell asleep at one point after she came home from college and created Negan in her
mind because he was everything anyone could want in their life. “You are so beautiful.”

“You keep up with comments like that and I’m going to force you into one of these restrooms,” she
slurred hearing his cocky laugh against the side of her neck. Nuzzling his nose against the nape of
her neck, Negan took his time to continue to tease her while depositing gentle kisses over her neck.
“Negan, I’m not kidding.”
“I didn’t think you were,” he growled against the side of her neck, nipping delicately at the flesh.
When she turned in his arms, Negan’s eyelids were heavy with desire and she braced her hands
over the center of his chest. “And while I would love to do that…that’s not how you’re going to
sleep with me the first time.”

“Who said anything about sleeping with you?” she scratched her nails softly down the front of his
shirt and sighed loudly. “Anyways, what is it with you wanting the first time you sleep with me to
be such a big deal?”

“Because you’re a big deal,” Negan retorted, reaching out to slide his hands in over her sides. “The
only time you’ve had sex, it’s been bad. I want this to be a good relationship, I want us to have
something in the future together. I want you to have the best experience possible. You need to
know how special you are to me. How I want to make everything perfect.”

“Negan…” she let out a disappointed breath suddenly feeling guilty hearing him saying all that he
was. Lifting her hand, she brushed her fingers through his hair and then palmed over the side of his
face. With Negan leaning into her touch, she thought about how the two of them were two
completely different people. “I’m not sure I deserve all of this. I’m not sure that I deserve you.”

“Shouldn’t I be the judge of that?” Negan quipped, his right eyebrow raising while he closed the
distance between them and traced his rough fingertips over the side of her face. “I never thought I
would care for someone again. I told myself when this thing started that you were just going to be
a small part of my life. I was lonely and I wanted some company but spending time with you and
Sam together made me realize I wanted something more.”

“But I don’t deserve you Negan. You are this flawless guy that believes in love and romance.
Someone who goes above and beyond. I will never be that person. I don’t even know if I’m
capable of that. My whole life it was instilled in me that I had to be a hard worker. That’s all I was
supposed to be. I’m stubborn and I’m probably not the person you want,” she thought about herself
knowing that Negan was everything anyone could want. He was good looking. He was sweet, rich
and overall a good man. “I just think you deserve someone better than me. Someone that is going
to love you above and beyond. More than anything.”

“Who knows how you will feel as time goes on,” Negan hushed her, his thumb dragging over her
bottom lip and his eyelashes fluttered while she found herself locked on his stare. “When you care
about someone, you are supposed to support them through the things they want the most in their
life. If you decide that you want me in your life for a while, I want what you want. I want you to
have the career that you’ve always wanted. I want you to be the best fucking lawyer out there and I
will do whatever it takes to help you get there. I want you to live your dreams and I want to do
whatever I can to support you along the way.”

“I have to be honest with you,” she knew that they had people surrounding them, but in that
moment, it really only felt like it was just her and Negan in that moment. “I want this. I want this a
lot, but I am so scared that I’m going to fuck this up.”

“I think we always have a little bit of that when we care about something,” Negan stated with a
shrug of his shoulders and he sighed loudly. “I’m scared. This is the first time I’ve dated anyone
since I’ve been nineteen. I was a married man most of my life. Now here I am starting a
relationship with a beautiful, strong, dedicated, goal oriented perfect young woman and it scares
the shit out of me. I want to give her everything all at once and I don’t want to scare her off.”

“Damn you Negan,” she frowned knowing that as much as part of her wanted to pull away from
this and go back to her previous beliefs, she knew that by the way he talked it would keep her
swooning over him and wanting more. “Why do you have to be so fucking charming?”
“I was born that way I guess?” Negan joked, his nose wrinkling when he lowered in closer to her
with a smile. “God, you are so fucking beautiful. You know that?”

“You’re pretty beautiful yourself,” she muttered stealing another kiss from Negan’s lips when she
managed to tip up enough on her toes. Negan hummed and a faint growl fell from his lips when
they parted. “I think I’m pretty damn lucky if you ask me. It’s like you came right out of a
children’s book, you’re like a prince.”

“Well, I don’t know many princes in children’s books with my vocabulary and my liking of using
the word fuck as much as I do,” Negan reached for her hand to hook his fingers with hers, giving
her a wink, “but I’ll take that compliment.”

“Good,” she snickered as he led her around the inside of the building they were in. They played a
few random arcade games together all in the name of having fun. It was all very nice. It had been
so long since Y/N had really done anything in the name of fun. She truthfully missed it. Life was
way too serious over the last few years and getting to relax was amazing. After some lunch, Negan
informed her that they were going to do some laser tag before their next ‘event’. What was
surprising was the time had gone by so quickly. Of course, they had already done a bunch of
things, but she enjoyed it so much that time went by so quickly. “I have to be honest with you
Negan, I haven’t played laser tag since I was like ten.”

“Well, I have to be honest with you and tell you that I did this a few weeks ago with Sam and I’m
pretty damn good,” Negan lifted his hands in the shape of guns and made gun noises making her
laugh when he did it. Moving over to get suited up for the game, she felt ridiculous in the gear, but
at the same time she was amused. “So, you’re going to have to put your best game forward.”

“We should up the stakes of the game then,” she muttered, her eyes narrowing out at Negan while
he finished snapping the vest together. With her suggestion, his nose wrinkled and a wicked smile
tugged at the corner of his lips. Stepping forward, she was attempting to be quiet enough so that it
was between them. “Whoever wins before we leave to the next event, the loser has to give oral to
the winner.”

“Well, is that really torture for losing?” Negan slurred, an arrogant grin pressing in over his lips
and an amused laugh filled the air. “I really enjoy doing that for you.”

“And I really want to do it for you, so it’s a win-win either way,” she offered making Negan
chuckle and shake his head before back stepping toward the doors that were opening. “Is that a
yes?”

“No,” Negan shook his head with a snort.

“Is that a no?” she poked further and Negan threw his arms up in the air.

“Nope,” Negan retorted, his head tipping to the side leaving her confused as to what his answer
was.

“I don’t even know the rules here Negan,” she stepped into the ‘arena’ and watched Negan stand
right before her in the middle of it.

“Well, it’s red which is me against you which is blue. Each player has five lives. The first one to
get all five lives taken away loses,” Negan explained when the doors behind them closed and the
lights went dark to the point that neon lights were shining on them. A loud alarm filled the air and
her eyebrow arched in response. “And it starts when that sound goes off.”
“Oh? That alarm?” she confirmed and Negan nodded his head, so in return she lifted the play gun
in response and shot it at Negan watching his vest flash while it vibrated. “So, you have four lives
now?”

“You little shit,” Negan grunted, looking to see that one of the five lines that represented his lives
disappeared. Her laugh filtered through the air when Negan lifted his head to the see that she had
ran away. “That wasn’t very nice you know.”

“I know,” she giggled from behind the wall that she had hidden behind. Looking over her shoulder,
she tried to survey where Negan was before to see that he was gone. “It’s not my fault that you fell
for the oldest trick in the book. Like I didn’t know how to play.”

Trying to move through the maze of the dark arena that they had, she was attempting to be quiet to
try to catch Negan making noise. Turning the corner of the glowing maze, she looked around the
room that was surrounding her. There was a level above her and multiple places for Negan to hide.
The sound of a whistle made her lift her head toward the second level to see Negan above her. The
vibration of her vest going off was felt and she glared up at Negan who was laughing. Quickly he
disappeared again while she watched the life disappear from her vest.

“Not cool,” she headed for the steps wondering how Negan had even gotten up there without
making a sound. When she got to the second floor, she let out a confused breath. Holding up the
laser gun, she tried to see if she could find Negan. There were multiple areas that he could be
hidden behind, but she didn’t think he would have been able to. It was pretty damn dark and she
was doing her best to find Negan. Feeling her vest vibrating again, she let out a groan. He got her
again. “Son of a bitch.”

“Boom!” she looked over her shoulder to see that Negan was on the steps kneeling down and she
dramatically threw her hands up in the air in frustration. “Get better at this sweetheart. You’re
disappointing me.”

“I can’t help that you’re the master of fucking hiding in this place,” she watched him head down
the stairs toward the first floor and she stayed where she was. Instead of going after him this time
she was going to wait for him to come after her. He had four lives left and she had three. Sticking
close to the ground, she moved around the top floor and found that there was another staircase that
led down to the first floor.

The sound of a whistle filled the air again and she let out an overwhelmed sound, “Where are you
sweetheart?”

“You’re too damn cocky,” she swiftly moved through the maze trying to follow Negan’s voice.
Spotting Negan in the middle of the arena hiding behind one of the props made a disappointed
grunt fall from her lips since he had himself hidden just enough that she couldn’t get him. When he
heard her voice, his head popped up and he tried to move toward where she was.

“Or maybe I’m just that damn good,” Negan was quick on his feet hiding from place to place
while she kept a tight eye on him. When he finally moved around the corner where he would find
her, she quickly pulled the trigger hearing him hiss when she got him. “Nice play. I let you have
that one.”

“Sure you did,” she watched him quickly sneak off and their game continued on proving that
Negan was better at this. He didn’t end up losing another life at all by the time she was on her last.
“You know, this has only proved to me that you are good to have around if I need someone
murdered.”
“Are you looking to hire someone?” Negan called out and she tried to find him by following his
voice. “I could do it for you if the pay was right.”

“Well, I was hoping maybe you would do it to my new boyfriend. You see he’s very arrogant,” she
answered, cautiously turning the corner of the maze trying to listen for footsteps again. “I think he
has a lot of money.”

“That’s not really the kind of pay I’m looking for,” Negan’s voice whispered in her ear when she
felt the toy gun placed against her back and when she felt the vest vibrate a final time she scoffed.
Her vest went completely dark when Negan had won and she turned around to glare at Negan. “Do
you know how long I was behind you? You’re so bad at this baby girl.”

“You are such a child,” she shoved him backwards making his back hit the wall and his deep raspy
laugh surrounded her. Tugging firmly at his hair, she pulled him to her lips and kissed him roughly.
After getting beat so bad by Negan she just wanted to be in control of something.

“And you’re a poor loser,” Negan teased with a growl when she tugged delicately at his bottom lip
with her teeth. Rolling her eyes, she tugged him to her again and felt his tongue brushing between
her lips while they kissed.

Well, she certainly could admit this was the first time that she had made out with someone while in
laser tag. Negan grasped securely to her body, dragging her tightly to him. A gasp fell from her lips
when Negan reached around her to squeeze her bottom firmly in his palms. In the middle of their
kissing the lights turned on making her pull away from Negan when someone came in.

“Hey, they are about to open to the public,” one of the employees explained to Negan who looked
to his watch and let out a long sigh. Negan nodded and the employee gave them a strange once over
before backstepping slowly. They had just been making out and she could tell the employee was
judging them for it.

“I guess I’m going to have to take a raincheck on that blowjob I just won,” Negan smacked
playfully at her bottom before starting to undo the vest that he was wearing. They got took off the
gear and put it back where it belonged before heading out into the arcade area to see that the empty
building was having people filtering in. “We have to get going to our next place anyways. Did you
have fun?”

“I can tell you what I had the least fun doing,” she grumbled, playfully poking at Negan’s ribs
trying to give him a hard time for the last thing they just did. Hearing Negan snort made her smile
before she loosely wrapped her arm around his waist. “Being serious, yeah. I had a really good
time. I haven’t had fun in a very long time like that. I felt like I was a kid again.”

“I guess that’s one of the coolest things about having Sam in my life. It was possible for me to still
try to be fun and be an adult at the same time,” Negan led her toward the car and helped her get in.
When he moved around to the other side, he looked at his phone for a minute to text someone
before starting up the car. “Are you good with heights?”

“Am I good with heights?” she repeated his question as he started pulling out of the spot. “I mean, I
think so, yeah.”

“Oh, good,” Negan tilted his head to the side before a hint of a smile pressed in over his handsome
features. “Would have been bad if you weren’t.”

“That’s very vague,” she watched him give her a quick wink before turning his attention back to
the road. After taking a moment, she adjusted in the passenger seat of his mustang. Brazenly
reaching her hand out, she stroked over Negan’s thigh and heard him clear his throat when they
were stopped at a light. “You know, I can still give you that blowjob that you won. You can focus
on the road and I could do that.”

“As much as I like the idea of that,” Negan watched her hand center in over his pants making his
chiseled jaw flex, “I’m going to turn that idea down right now. Maybe when we’re not in prime
traffic and it’s not the first time that you’ve done it fully.”

“Well damn, I thought you were the dangerous type,” she pouted, caressing one final time over the
center of Negan’s pants making him grunt.

“I’m the dangerous type, but when you do that for the first time, I want all of my attention on you.
Not on the road that might kill us if I took my attention from it,” Negan declared, adjusting in the
seat while he continued to drive. It was a longer drive than she expected. When he pulled up to a
place where she could see multiple hot air balloons in the distance, she let out an anxious sound.
“Come on sweetheart.”

“What are we doing?” she let out a nervous breath and Negan smirked before getting out of the
car. Following him toward one of the hot air balloons, she felt her heart pounding inside of her
chest while she stared out at it. Negan was talking, but she didn’t hear him. She was blocking him
out. It was easy to do because she had never been in one of these things before and she found it
terrifying. “You certainly weren’t kidding when you said you were the dangerous type.”

“Statistically hot air balloons are the safest form of air travel,” Negan looked over his shoulder at
her after talking to the guy that seemed to be waiting for them. Reaching for her hand, Negan
wiggled his fingers at her and she found herself frozen. “I know you’re scared but trust me…when
you are up there you are going to love it and not regret doing it.”

“Unless of course we explode and burn up,” she rambled making Negan chuckle before he waved
her on. Even though the idea scared her immensely, she got into the wicker basket and kind of
regretted her decision when she stepped into it. “This isn’t going to snap off as soon we get up in
the air, right?”

“It won’t,” Negan assured her, hopping in beside her and giving the thumbs up to the balloon pilot.
Noticing that she seemed to still be tense, Negan wrapped his arms around her from behind urging
her to grab a hold of the edge of the wicker basket. “Darling, trust me. Everything is okay. I
wouldn’t let anything happen to you.”

“It’s not like you can control this thing Negan,” she grumbled feeling Negan’s fingers hooking with
hers and her eyes closed when the pilot started getting things ready. When it started to raise, she let
out a quiet squeal, but it was obviously loud enough for Negan to hear. Nuzzling his nose against
the side of her neck, Negan took his time being close to her to try and calm her. “Have you done
this before?”

“No,” Negan answered making her turn her head to the look at him and Negan’s nose wrinkled
with amusement when it was obvious that she was paranoid. “Of course I’ve done this before. I’m
just fucking with you sweetheart. Please. Trust me with this one. Give it a chance. Keep your eyes
open. You’re in my arms, I’ve got you.”

Trying to keep her cool, she turned her attention toward the landscapes that were surrounding them.
It was hard not to keep her eyes closed and want to drop down in the basket to keep her head down
so she could pretend that none of this was happening. It was just with Negan holding her in his
arms and his chin resting against her shoulder, she knew this was something that she wanted to
experience. She wanted to remember this moment with him. This was something that would have
come right out of a romance movie and it was clearly something that Negan had thought hard
about.

Trying to calm her nerves, she leaned further back into Negan’s chest and felt him deposit a soft
kiss over the side of her neck. It was quiet between the two of them while they continued to rise.
Wrapped up in his arms was really the best place to be right now. Anywhere else and she knew
that she would have been panicking. Well, panicking more than she already was.

“I know that it’s a scary thought, but isn’t this beautiful?” Negan urged her to look out at the area
surrounding them. They were right above the water and he was right. This really was the perfect
view. This was something that you would only dream of seeing, but now she actually was
impressed with it. It was inspirational and beautiful. The cool air that surrounded them made her
shudder and Negan wrapped her up in his arms tighter. “Up here you realize how small you really
are in this world. It leaves you thinking of all the opportunities there are in the world. How much
there is to still see with each day.”

“I’m sure the longer we’re up here, the better I will feel about things. Right now, I’m just thinking
about how much we would splatter if we fell from up here,” she stuttered a bit through her words
and it made the air balloon pilot laugh from behind them. While she wanted to bicker with him, she
knew it was for the best that she didn’t because if she did, he could get distracted and she didn’t
want that.

“I’m not big on heights either,” Negan confessed and she let out a sound indicating that she didn’t
believe him. “Nah, I’m serious. It has always scared me, but I started realizing when I would do
things like this it really opened my view to the world in general. Up here you just see how big the
world is and shit. There is so much you know you will never see and shit like that. Up here, you
get to experience it all at once. Have a much broader spectrum of the world. You know that even if
you feel like you’re stuck in one place there is just so much more to everything in life. You’re just
a tiny piece of the puzzle in this great big world.”

“Wow, you’re very…deep,” she was looking over her shoulder at him seeing the way he was
eyeing over everything. When she said that he rolled his eyes and frowned. “I don’t mean it in a
bad way Negan. I just never thought of things like that.”

There was a moment of silence while they stood comfortable together staring out at everything.
There was still a fear in her, but it had died down the longer they were up there. Sitting in silence,
she found her mind lingering, “Where do you see our relationship going?”

“What? Like in the next few minutes? The next few hours?” Negan snickered and drew a chill
down her spine with the warmth of his breath tickling over the side of her neck.

“I don’t know. Let’s pretend this whole dating thing sticks and we stay together. What do you
picture in our future?” she could feel him tense behind her and she didn’t know if it was because
her question scared him or it was something else.

“Are you sure that’s a game you want to play? I don’t want to scare you off on the first date,”
Negan stated with a loud sigh and she turned in his arms, focusing on him instead of the world
around them. When she reached for his hands, he shrugged his shoulders and brough them up so he
could deposit a kiss over the back of them. “Well, for starters we would finish this air balloon ride
and land safely on the ground when it’s done.”

“Hopefully,” she grumbled knowing that he was being silly before he stroked over the back of her
hands with his rough thumbs.
“I finish off the night with you with my final surprise. Then from here on out, I continue to support
you getting everything back with school so you can finish. I’ll be your biggest cheerleader and you
can be mine this year when I try to get my team to the championships. You can sit in the dugout
with me and sport some Saviors gear,” Negan winked, playfully wiggling her arms in his acting
like she was cheering and it made her laugh. “If you decided you still wanted to be with me, from
there I imagine you would finish school. I think by that point you would be living with me
completely. Your parents wouldn’t be totally accepting of it, but it’s your life and you’re a big girl
so they would have to live with it. You would get yourself a really good job. I would make you
breakfast every morning and I’d have dinner ready for you every night. And I feel like we would
need to get a dog. Sam wants a dog.”

“A golden retriever,” she filled in and Negan’s smile expanded over his handsome features while
she lifted her hand to trace over the side of his face and through his short beard. “We could name it
Oliver, Olly for short.”

“Oliver it is then,” Negan agreed with her and took a moment to think about things. “When I knew
that you loved me, I would come up with an elaborate proposal to ask you to marry me. I would
use Olly to do it. Now going on the idea that you would say yes, I would give you the wedding you
want. Whatever it was, I would want you to have your dreams come true. When you were
comfortable, maybe one day we’d have kids. One thing is for sure…I would do everything I could
to pamper you every minute you spent with me. I would dedicate every day to you so you knew
that you were loved. I would kiss you every morning and every night. No matter how things went
each day, I would always tell you before bed that I loved you. I’d never waste a minute showing
you how important you were to me.”

“Well…damn,” she felt a lump grow in her throat and she was trying to hold back her awe for the
man before her. If there was one thing that Negan was good at, it was telling a pretty phenomenal
story. “If only, right?”

“Anything is possible sweetheart,” Negan reached up to cup her hands in his face, sweeping his
thumbs over the sides of her face. “Is there any kind of edits you would want to put in there?”

“Truthfully? No,” she shook her head, letting out a nervous breath knowing that she had never
really wanted to find someone to fall in love with. Yet, the story Negan just sold her sounded
perfect and it seemed like he understanded everything in life that she wanted. That he would be
eager to give her the same lifestyle while she wanted while still being there for her as a significant
other. There weren’t many people in the world that would accept her like that. Yet he was willing
with open arms. “You…you can’t be fucking real.”

“It’s the dimples that make you think that. I know they are pretty dreamy,” he claimed with a
dramatic expression, dragging his tongue over his bottom lip. It made her roll her eyes, but in a
good way. He was always trying to make her smile or laugh and she liked it. “Life is short Y/N.
You never know how much you have left of it, so you have to grab it while you have it. It’s
something that I want to take advantage of every single day. I’ve witnessed too many times how
fast life can pass you by and I just want to spend the rest of my life as happy as possible. While also
supporting the people I love and making their lives as good as possible too.”

“How many kids?” she inquired surprising Negan with the question and he shrugged his shoulders.
“How many kids would you want us to have?”

“It wouldn’t matter because no matter what…even if we just had fur babies for a while it would be
perfect because I was with you,” Negan whispered and she found herself leaning forward to hug
him tightly in her arms. Resting her head against the center of his chest, she could hear the steady
heartbeat beneath her head. With Negan stroking his fingers over the back of her head, she closed
her eyes and enjoyed the warmth of him around her. “Anything spent with you, no matter how long
or short will be a blessing for me.”

Lifting her head up, she felt Negan palming in over the side of her face and Negan lowered in to
meet her in a passionate kiss that left her breathless. When Negan moved away, she could tell that
she was lost in the moment and didn’t know what to say.

“Wow, it’s uh really beautiful up here and it gets you emotional,” she waved her hand in the air
trying to stop herself from getting emotional over everything he just told her. It was all so fucking
romantic and the fact that anyone would ever want to be that with her blew her mind.

“Yeah, it’s beautiful up here, but right now I’m look at something so much more beautiful,” Negan
brushed his fingers into her hair taking her breath away in the moment when he lowered down to
kiss her again. It was a quick kiss before he turned her in his arms to hold her tightly.

Well, this date certainly turned out much more spectacular than she could have ever imagined.
Everything Negan said was weighing heavy on her and it got her brain thinking a lot of things that
she never knew she was even capable of thinking. Negan was an incredible man and she was
entirely too lucky to have him in her life. Yet, she still wondered if he was too good for her and that
worried her more than she cared to admit. This life he told the story of sounded perfect. She just
wondered if it was too good for someone like her.
 Chapter 9
Chapter Summary

The date between Negan and Y/N continues leaving her to contemplate just how much
she is starting to already fall for Negan.

Chapter Notes

I'm finishing editing this super early in the morning which means I've been up all night
to finish this for those that asked for it. I hope you enjoy it. Sorry if there are any
glaring errors. I will try to read this again tomorrow and if I find anything big I will try
to edit it. Thank you to those that read this!

If you like the chapter, let me know how you feel. Even a small comment is
appreciated.

Back on the ground. Thank God. Not that Y/N didn’t like it up in the sky with Negan on that air
balloon, but that fear that she was going to fall to her death was always lingering. It was beautiful
up there and it was a memory she would never forget, but there was definitely that fear that she was
going to die. So, to be able to be back on the ground was a wonderful thing. There was still tension
in her knees while she waited for Negan to finish speaking to the pilot.

What they had just done was something that she would have never pictured herself doing. Being
with Negan had opened her up to so many things already and it blew her away that Negan actually
got her up there in that balloon. For most people she would have probably said no, but for Negan
she did it no questions asked. Did she stress her worries? Hell yes she did, but somehow he
convinced her to do it. And she was thankful that he had. Everything was so perfect and Negan
opened her up to so many new thoughts. It also showed her that there was so much more to him
than she thought there was.

Glancing over her shoulder, she could see that Negan was laughing with the pilot and she couldn’t
help, but smile. God, his smile was contagious. There weren’t many people in the world that when
they smiled, it just made you smile in return, but that was how it was with Negan. Maybe it had to
do with Negan’s dimples, but there was something to the way he smiled that instantly made her
happy.

Turning to her, Negan reached out to place his hand over the small of her back. When they started
heading away from the air balloon, she felt her legs wobble beneath her and Negan firmly hooked
his arm around her hips to keep her locked in beside him.

“You okay?” Negan paused to let her get the feeling back in her legs. Man, she would have loved
to have been able to pretend like she was okay. It made her feel bad to know that she couldn’t put a
façade around Negan. Giving her a once over, Negan lowered down and rubbed at her legs trying to
help her get the feeling back in them. “I think you kept them too straight while we were up there.”
“I was scared,” she retorted with a laugh and Negan looked up at her from where he was kneeling.
Amusement flooded his features while he worked to try to get the blood flow back into her legs.
“You can’t blame me.”

“I told you I wasn’t going to let anything happen to you,” Negan reminded her with a wink,
standing back up to caress over her body. Nudging his nose against hers, Negan knew that she
enjoyed the closeness of him and he took advantage of it. “You’ll always be safe with me.”

“There is part of me that actually believes that,” she stated with a sigh and Negan nudged her jaw
with his fingertips. The wink he gave her made her sigh and she knew that she wanted to believe
that she would always be safe with Negan in her life. Yet, there was another part of her that made
her think being with Negan put her guard down too much.

“You should believe it, because it’s true,” Negan hooked his arm around hers leading her away
from where they were making sure to hold onto her just in case her legs gave out on her again. He
was leading her to their final place for the night and she didn’t know if she had it in her to keep
walking. Unfortunately, the air balloon had kicked her ass physically. While she didn’t want to
admit it, that hot air balloon took a lot out of her. If they were even to do it again, she was going to
have to teach herself to get used to it again. “You need me to carry you?”

“Oh please,” she looked to Negan with a snort and he knew that she thought he was being
ridiculous, but instead he acted as if she was saying yes. Negan got into position for her to jump
onto his back so he could give her a piggyback ride to where they were going. Rolling her eyes, she
went to move and Negan let out a grunt. “You already told me that your back was shit.”

“I’ll live,” Negan insisted and she did what he pleased, wrapping her arms around his shoulders
while he hooked his arms underneath her legs to keep her safely locked in his grasp. The sun was
setting and just beyond them, she could see in the distance that there was an overlook above the
water where there was a campfire lit. Negan’s mustang was in the background. It was obvious that
someone had set something up for them while they were in the hot air balloon and she found
herself impressed. When they got to the hill, she urged Negan to set her down so she didn’t end up
hurting him. When they reached the overlook, she could see that there were some blankets with
pillows set up and some snacks for them. “I thought we could end the night on this outlook seeing
the hot air balloons and just enjoying the time underneath the stars.”

“Was all of this Sam’s idea?” she was impressed taking a moment to stand near the edge of the
overlook. The hot air balloons were reflecting in the water and underneath the night sky it was
fucking beautiful. Frozen in the moment, she couldn’t believe how amazing all of this had turned
out to be. When Negan’s arms wrapped around her from behind, she almost jumped after getting
lost in the moment.

“The first of the date was made with the help of Sam,” he rest his chin against her shoulder to also
take a moment to gaze out at the scenery before them. “The hot air balloon and this part was all my
idea. Sam wanted you to have fun and I wanted to end things…special.”

“This…this is something else,” she was in awe of Negan. How was someone so capable of being
this perfect? Wrapping her arms around his, she wanted to stay locked on this moment for a while.
Just watching the sunset, being wrapped up in Negan’s arms out in the middle of nowhere
essentially was indescribable. “When am I going to wake up?”

“So you like this?” Negan confirmed and she immediately nodded making him laugh at her
quickness to answer him. “Life is always so damn busy that places and moments like these are
things I’m addicted to. I like the silence. I like being able to be away from the busy of the world
around us. You know?”
“I just don’t understand how you do all of this,” she was honest with Negan. Turning in his arms,
she braced her palms against his chest and shrugged her shoulders. “How are you just…I don’t
even know how to describe you other than amazing.”

“It’s magic,” Negan snickered, nodding over toward the blankets. Negan moved over toward the
blankets to drop down on top of one before wiggling his finger at her to get her to move in beside
him.

“Truthfully, I really like nature and it just calms me,” Negan watched her get comfortable beside
him and he reached out to brush her hair back out of her face. With a yawn, Negan stretched out his
body and nudged her playfully with his shoulder. “I’m sure you’re fucking exhausted at this point.
I know I’m feeling it.”

“I think being with you keeps me going,” she slid in closer to him and reached out to stroke over
the side of Negan’s face seeing the joyful expression that he gave her while she did it. “You’re
nothing like I thought you were Negan.”

“Is that a good or a bad thing?” Negan poked, his eyebrow raising in curiosity when she took in a
long, shallow breath. “I’d hate to disappoint you.”

“I thought you were going to be this bad boy that only wanted to get into my pants and ruin my life
while simultaneously spoiling me at the same time,” she explained making Negan chuckle when
she said that. “I won’t lie at first that turned me on incredibly much, but you…the real you is so
much better. You still have a little bit of that bad boy in you, but you are probably the most
astonishing man I’ve ever met.”

“Well, I don’t know about that,” Negan grumbled, his eyes narrowing when he thought about what
she said. Dropping onto this back and folding his arms behind his head, Negan looked up at the
night sky. Unhurriedly, she lowered in beside him and when he took notice that she wanted to be
close, he wrapped one of his arms around her. A sigh fell from his throat when she slid her hand
over his chest and he lowered his other arm to hook his fingers with hers so he could hold her hand.
“I’m not an amazing man Y/N. I’ve been shitty in my life. I’ve told you that.”

“I know you have, but I can only judge you based off what I have seen and experienced with you. I
don’t care who you used to be,” she turned her head to stare out at him while he looked up at the
stars. His Adam’s apple bounced in his throat and his jaw flexed while she spoke. “I mean look at
me Negan, I’m a fucking mess. If you compare the two of us people would be questioning why
you would bother with someone like me.”

“Why do you think so poorly of yourself?” Negan frowned, his head finally turning to the side so
he could stare out at her. “Just because your parents made you feel a certain way, doesn’t mean
they are right.”

“You’ve been around me Negan. I’m very anti-family. I’m very goal oriented on just having a
career. I don’t believe in that romance stuff. I had my eye on one thing my whole life. You saw
what I did to my professor,” she listed off some of the things she knew would be a common turn
off for people and Negan smirked. “You’ve been around me enough to see that when I want
something, I turn into a stubborn asshole when I don’t get it.”

“Yet, I’m still here,” Negan pointed out, his eyebrow arching up and she let out a shuddering
breath. “What happened with your professor, that guy deserved it. He was a fucking asshole. The
guy deserves much worse than what he got. He didn’t even learn after you did that. He’s still an
asshole. As far as the not believing in romance, you just never realized that you could have both.
You could still have the career you always wanted while getting to be happy. You just need the
right person in your life for you to know that. I’m not going to be that person that makes you pick
between your career and love.”

“Yeah, but I think you deserve someone who focuses completely on you,” she suggested with a
somber expression and he raised up on his elbow. There was something to the way he was looking
at her and she frowned. “After all you have been through, I think you need someone that is going to
make you happy.”

“You make me happy,” Negan hushed her, reaching his large hand out to trace over the side of her
face with the pad of his rough thumb. Closing her eyes, she turned her head into his touch. With
just a simple touch, he had her heart hammering inside of her chest. “I don’t want someone else; I
want you. Just the way you are. Part of the fun of liking someone is figuring out how to make
things work. No matter how long it takes, I plan to do that.”

Gradually her eyes opened and she didn’t know what to say. Leaning into his palm, she pressed a
subtle kiss over the inside of his palm and reached up to grasp tightly to it, “Why even put this
much effort into me Negan?”

“Because you’re the first person that’s made me feel alive since Lucille passed away,” Negan
explained with a long sigh, his eyes becoming very serious while she cuddled her face up against
his palm. The sound of the hot air balloons in the background caught their attention off in the
distance breaking her stare from him. It was quite the beautiful sight and she was happy that they
were here together right now to experience it together. Yet, she had to pull her eyes from it to return
her attention back to him. “Other than Sam, I was completely numb to the world. I was just here.”

Sliding his fingers up, he brushed them through her hair and seemed to be locked on her with a
gaze she couldn’t quite read, but it made her feel like she was the only woman in the world when it
came to him, “Then I see this spunky ass girl across the street going off on her father and she
intrigued me. Then I just so happen to run into her that same night at a bar and to me...that was a
sign. The world was telling me, Negan…you gotta have that girl in your life. And because I was
scared of commitment I thought, she needs money, I have money…let’s come up with a
compromise.”

“I know our story,” she snickered, but Negan hushed her, sliding in closer to her. With the warmth
of him beside her, she had chills running down her spine.

“Yeah, but you don’t know how I felt and I’m telling you,” he informed her with an arch of his
eyebrows. Tracing his fingers from the side of her face, down over her neck and toward her collar
bone, Negan took his time thinking things over. “I know we originally were supposed to have this
sugar daddy thing going on and I’m okay with still being your hot daddy boyfriend…”

The way he said that made her throw her head back and burst out in laughter because it sounded so
awkward. Negan’s arm hooked around her and he tried to persuade her to look back at him, his
snort falling from his lips, “Fuck, you get what I’m saying.”

“It just sounded so bad,” she tried to stop herself from laughing and Negan theatrically rolled his
eyes. Reaching her hand out, she caressed over the side of his rough features while he thought
things out.

“I just realized I didn’t want us just to have this sex-based relationship where there was nothing
between us other than us being physical. I liked who you were. I like what you stood for and
getting to spend time with you and Sam was the best few days I’ve had in a very long time,” Negan
explained, the muscle at the corner of his jaw flexing as she continued to stroke tenderly over his
face. “I was numb to the world and I was just walking through it like a fucking zombie. Then you
woke something in me. Something that I never thought I would want again. I really like you Y/N
and I want you in my life. For as long as I can have you. You bring a part of me to life that I didn’t
think was there anymore.”

“I’m pretty sure if I heard that before you, it would have scared me away,” she confessed hating to
say that, but it was true. That wasn’t the kind of thing she would have been comfortable with
hearing before. It meant that she had someone else’s life in her palm. That someone cared for her
more than she really wanted them to. For so long she just wanted to dedicate her life to her career,
yet here she found herself wanting to be wrapped up in this relationship with Negan. “But I think
you do the same thing for me. You bring out the best of me. The parts I thought died a long time
ago.”

“I just want you happy,” Negan stated with a deep, raspy tone as he stroked his fingers over the
curve of her neck and he shrugged. “Whatever I can do to make that happen, I just want to do that.”

“There is no doubt in my mind that you will continue to do that for me Negan,” she assured him,
sliding her fingers into his hair to mess it up beneath her touch. Instead of being upset by it, he just
seemed enchanted by her. “Did you do things like this with Lucille?”

“Give her pep talks? All the time,” Negan joked and she playfully hit him in the chest and it
brought a large smile to develop over his lips that drew attention to his dimples. “I tried to make
life as special for her as I could. I messed up a lot and by the time I lost her, I realized how much
time I wasted. I never wanted to do that again if I was given a second chance.”

“And I’m your second chance?” she confirmed watching his face twist with uncertainty.

“You’re whole different story. One that I hope is very long with many chapters and potentially
turns out having multiple books,” Negan declared with a loud sigh while she cupped his face in her
hands, drawing him closer to her. “I hope we make a series with this book we’re starting to write
together.”

“You think it would be a top seller?” she teased back with him and Negan’s nose wrinkled before
nodding.

“Of fucking course,” Negan professed with a firm grunt. “People would be rooting for us from
around the world. Appreciating our relationship and wanting us to have that happy ending.”

“God, I like you so much,” she whimpered and Negan looked confused when she dropped her head
back. “This is…I swear Negan, it’s like I’ve walked right out of a romance novel. I’ve gone from
being someone who doesn’t want to love anybody and I’m fucking ready to marry you after our
first date.”

“Oh come on,” he chortled, lowering his head enough to kiss at the inside of her palm. “You’re just
saying that because I worked my ass off on this date and you don’t want me to feel bad for being
so damn cheesy.”

“I wish that were true,” she grumbled hating that she actually did like Negan as much as she did.
“You are the most amazing gentleman I have ever met in my whole life.”

“You know,” Negan felt her tugging at his shirt to pull him in closer to her and he hovered above
her lips, a faint smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “That might be the first time anyone used
the word gentleman to describe me.”

“Well, they don’t see what I see,” she silenced him, tracing her fingers over his lips and it seemed
to charm him even more while he braced his weight over her. “And what I see is a man that I could
only make up in my dreams, but he’s real. He’s perfect, he’s handsome…he’s broken.”

When she said that, she could see a sadness flood over him and he lowered his head, but she shook
her head and lifted up enough to almost meet his lips in a kiss, “But he’s perfect and I want him
just the way he is too. No one would ever go above and beyond for me like this in my life. No one.
He sees that I’m broken too and instead of holding it against me, he embraced it and wants to heal
me. That takes one hell of a man.”

“You’re worth it,” Negan whispered, his hazel eyes locked on hers as she finally lifted up enough
to meet his lips in long, drawn out kiss. Grasping tightly to the hair at the back of his head, she
pulled him in closer to her and was yearning to kiss him repeatedly.

“So are you,” she promised stroking down the back of his neck before wrapping her arms loosely
around his shoulders. It drew his body in closer to hers and her body felt like it was on fire while
Negan settled himself in over her comfortably so they could kiss. Playing with Negan’s hair, she
valued the weight of him above her and felt like she was almost in a dream state. Under the stars,
kissing Negan felt incredible. Even in her wildest dreams, she would have never pictured
something like this. “Negan.”

“Yeah?” he growled, his lips sliding down over the side of her face where he bit delicately at her
jaw making her mewl out.

“No one is going to see us, right?” she rolled him onto his back so that way she was over him. A
cocky laugh fell from Negan’s throat while she reached for his shirt. The top few buttons were
already undone, revealing Negan’s chest and the dark curls of hair that were over it. Undoing the
rest of the buttons, she pushed the material aside and then palmed her hands up the length of his
torso before caressing them back down.

“If they do, they have some fucking mighty fine eyes. Anyone still out here is a bit of a ways away
and they are probably getting ready to leave at this point,” Negan answered her, biting into his
bottom lip when she lowered down to etch wet kisses over the center of his chest. “No one is going
to be spying on us making out, I promise.”

“Even if they were, I hope they enjoy it,” she shrugged her shoulders which amused Negan. Maybe
in the past she would have been shy about things, but right now the only thing that mattered in the
moment was Negan with her. Urgently, Negan reached for her and pulled her to his mouth again so
they could kiss. It was rough and passionate. Their hands were all over each other. Soft moans
were filling the air with how they were making each other feel. Attempting to push her shirt up her
body, Negan stopped when he reached her ribs. “It’s okay.”

Leaning back enough, she allowed him to finish getting the material from her setting it beside
them. Balancing his weight on his elbows, Negan’s mouth deposited wet kisses down the side of
her neck, over her collarbone and over her chest. His lips traced over her bra before he dragged his
wet lips between the valley of her breasts. Hooking her fingers into his hair, she tugged firmly on it
and heard him growl.

“Negan,” she panted, pulling her lips from his to look down over his long torso that was exposed
from his opened shirt. Reaching for the belt in his pants, she started to pull it open and Negan’s lust
filled eyes watched her closely. His tongue dragged out over his bottom lip. “This is so very
romantic. I’ve never had anyone do something like this for me.”

“It’s all you deserve and more,” Negan stammered while she opened up his pants and Negan
observed her hand disappear beneath his pants. A raspy moan fell deep from within his throat
while she sheathed his body in her palm. The veins in Negan’s throat became more prominent
while she was eager to see his reaction to her touching him like she was. When he bit at his bottom
lip and let out an appreciative sound, she lowered down and kissed over his chest. Circling her
tongue over his nipple, she nipped softly and it made him hiss. “You don’t have to thank me like
this.”

“This isn’t me thanking you,” she slurred against his skin, her wet lips continuing to pamper over
the length of his beautifully slender torso. “This is just something blooming from the moment we
shared together.”

“Sweetheart, you have got me wrapped around your finger,” Negan informed her while her kisses
lowered down over Negan’s torso. Stopping, she nibbled faintly at the flesh just below his navel
and he tossed his head back. There was nothing sexier than the sounds Negan made while she
pampered his body. With his uneven breaths getting louder she knew that she was getting him
exceedingly worked up.

Sliding her body down, she tugged at the material of his pants to get them down his hips. With the
tug, his thick erection sprung free from behind the material and rest against his lower abdomen.
Negan’s heavy breathing had his abdomen sinking, rising and falling again drawing attention to the
detailed lines in his body. Pressing teasing kisses over his hips, Y/N followed the v-line of his hip
toward where his throbbing manhood was resting against his abdomen. Starting with faint kisses
along his erection, she took her time to listen to the sounds it elicited from Negan. Dragging her
lips up the length of his manhood, she knew she wanted to dote on him. To find the things he liked,
the things that would drive him crazy with desire. Flicking her tongue out against the flesh evoked
him to shudder against her. Each reaction she was drawing from Negan caused her body to feel like
it was on fire. “Damn baby girl…”

Wrapping her fingers around the fullness of his erection, she teasingly flicked her tongue at the tip
before dragging her tongue back down. With her taunting him, his hips arched up toward her and it
made her smile. Surprisingly enough, it drew him to whine with her barely touching him. Negan
didn’t seem like a begging man, but his eyes were pleading with her and it made her proudly smile.

After tormenting him with delicate touches of her fingertips and gentle flicks of her tongue, she
finally took him in her mouth. Raising her eyes, she could see that Negan was resting on one elbow
while he reached out to brush the hair from her face to watch her pleasuring him. In the past that
might have made her nervous because she wasn’t someone who had a ton of experience in this, but
he wasn’t complaining.

Negan was a very verbal lover, letting her know when he liked something by the sounds he would
make. Pumping her hand over his length, she took her time to vary between using her tongue and
her lips. Each bob of her head over his length would draw quiet groans to fall from his beautiful
lips. Grasping firmly to his impressive length, she pulled her lips from his body with a wet sound
and watched his lips fall agape.

“You are fucking impeccable,” Negan announced, his thumb reaching out to slide over her slick
bottom lip. There was the need to touch her when she started kissing seductively against the tip of
cock again with her eyes locked on him. It impressed Negan that she was paying attention and
seemed confident in doing this. With everything she had told him, he assumed she would be shyer
about everything, but there was definitely a desire to want to please him. With her palm stroking at
the lower length of his manhood while she eagerly licked and teased at the tip, it was causing chills
to fill his body. “Fuck…”

“Good?” she purred and Negan’s jaw flexed, his head tipping to the side while he continued to
watch her. Twirling her tongue around the swollen tip, she took her time before lowering her wet
lips down his length again. Hollowing out her cheeks, she pulled back and dragged her tongue
against the velvety skin. A loud moan escaped Negan’s parted lips while she repeated the motion
several more times. Releasing his body from her mouth, she continued to twirl her fingers over the
tip and let out a shuddering breath. “Negan?”

“Yes beautiful?” Negan let out a breathy moan, his hazel eyes full of desire.

“I want you. Tonight,” she decided, her body shaking almost at the suggestion of it, but she knew it
was something she desperately wanted. “I can’t think of a more romantic way to do it. This day…
this moment has been perfect.”

Without saying a word, Negan reached for her to pull her up toward him so his mouth could collide
with hers. Their loud breaths filled the air around them while Negan took his time to kiss her. With
the soft stroking of his rough fingertips over the side of her face, she found that fear that was there
dissipating. Gasping when Negan’s fingers reached for the clip at the back of her bra, Negan
paused and pulled back enough to make sure she was okay with it. When she gave him a nod,
Negan unhooked the material and pulled it from her body, taking his time to pull it from her arms.

When she got comfortable over his lap, Negan’s head lowered to press wet kisses over her chest
toward her breast. Circling his talented tongue over her nipple, Negan’s eyes snuck a look at her
when she tipped her head back and bit down on her bottom lip. Her right arm hooked around his
shoulders while her left hand was grasping to his thick hair. Sucking softly at her flesh, Negan took
notice of her trembling in his arms and it made him smile against her flesh.

“Are you okay?” he confirmed, his deep voice vibrating against her sensitive flesh. Nodding, she
was eager to keep going while his rough palms slid up from her lower back toward her shoulders.
Small nibbles were placed over her body making her heart race inside of her chest. When Negan’s
fingers worked at getting her pants opened, she leaned back to help him and saw the intrigue in his
stare. On wobbly legs, she lifted up to tug her pants down her body. Stepping out of them, she
kicked the material aside and watched Negan drag his tongue out over his bottom lip. With a cock
of his head, she could feel her core heating up. “Come here beautiful.”

With his fingers wrapped around her waist, Negan guided her closer to him so he could grab her
panties from where he was seated on the blanket. Hooking his fingertips into the material, he kept
his eyes locked on hers while he bit down on his bottom lip. With ease he got the material down
her body and she trembled before him.

“You are fucking stunning,” Negan complimented her again. He was full of compliments today
and she wanted to believe them. So badly, she did. Her eyes came to a tight close when Negan
tipped forward to drag his bottom lip over the inside of her thigh. Growling against her flesh
purposely, he felt her shudder and it made a proud sound fall from his lips. “You are so much
better than I could have expected.”

Purring out when Negan’s mouth found its way between her thighs, she dropped her head back and
sank her fingers firmly into his hair. Negan’s tongue dragged the length of her body before his lips
latched onto her small bundle of nerves. With his tongue circling over her clitoris, she had a hard
time staying up on her legs. Whimpering out, Negan took notice and reached to keep a firm hold of
her thighs while his gifted mouth continued to pleasure her.

“Negan, please,” she begged when he tipped his head back, a slurping sound filling the air when he
licked over his lips. Watching Negan reach for his pants, he got them from his body from where he
was seated on the blanket. Lowering down to her knees, her body was doing its darndest not to
shake visibly while Negan pulled his short from his body to set it aside. Nervous breaths fell from
her lips when Negan stretched out his long legs. “We’re doing this?”

“That’s your decision,” Negan slurred when she crawled in over him and he adjusted his
positioning underneath her. With his eyes locked on her, she felt nervous. Usually, Negan would
tell her no or turn her down, but he was leaving it up to her. “I told you, the first time we were
together you were going to be the one in control of what happens.”

Tremoring, she grabbed his lengthy erection and anxiously stroked over him. The confidence she
had wasn’t as strong now that she knew Negan wasn’t turning her away this time. The whole time
Negan’s eyes were locked on hers and she moved over him further.

“Hey, take it slow,” Negan guided her with a slow nod when she led him toward her entrance.
Obviously, he thought she was jumping right into things and he didn’t want it to be like that. “Just
take your time. I’m in no rush. We want you comfortable first.”

“Okay,” she whimpered feeling the head of his cock sliding between her lips. Releasing him, she
reached for his shoulders and Negan took notice of her uneasiness. Motioning her to wait, he
reached for his pants and a panicked sound escape her. She was worried that he was going to stop.
“I still want this.”

“We need a condom,” Negan explained searching for his wallet in his pockets and she reached out
to grab a hold of his wrist.

“It’s okay. I told you that in the past,” she shook her head and Negan’s smile expanded over his
handsome features. “I trust you.”

“And I trust you too, but for our first time I think we should use one,” Negan assured her with a
shake of his head before he found his wallet. Pulling it open, he grabbed a condom and lifted it up
between his fingers. “Why don’t you put it on me?”

“Yeah?” she confirmed and Negan nodded, waiting for her to take the package from his fingers.
Accepting it, she knew she hadn’t really done this yet, but wanted to make sure that he was ready
for it first. Setting it aside, she grabbed a hold of his erection stroking it a few times.

Watching her, Negan dropped his hands back and saw her preparing him to put the condom on him.
A deep rumble fell from his throat when she caressed over the sensitive tip drawing the muscles in
his abdomen to flex. There was no hiding that she was anxious. This was a big deal for her and
especially in this relationship for them. Lifting one of his hands, he caressed over the small of her
back and nodded, “I think it’s ready.”

Nodding, she grabbed the condom from the blanket and fumbled the package in her fingers.
Cautiously tearing open the package, she pulled out the condom and set the wrapper aside.
Balancing herself better over him, she placed it over the swollen tip of Negan’s body. When she
froze, Negan’s hand helped guide her. Rolling it down his shaft, she let out a sigh when she got it
down his body.

“Good girl,” Negan hummed, reaching for her hips to pull her in over him and he reached between
them teasing the head of erection over her body. Watching her reactions to it, Negan was making
sure that she was more relaxed. The last thing he wanted was her to be tense so she didn’t enjoy
this at all. Biting into his bottom lip, Negan enjoyed the sight of her dropping her head back while
he teased the tip of his cock through her folds. “Whenever you’re ready, I am…”

Negan’s right hand settled in over the side of her neck while his thumb drew lines over her jawline.
His left arm was wrapped loosely around her waist while she grabbed a hold of his body. Leading it
toward her entrance, her breathing hitched when she aligned him up with her entrance. Negan’s
stare was on her when she anxiously lowered her hips over him, taking the tip of him into her
warmth. Immediately it made her let out a cry and Negan’s groan surrounded her.

“Take your time,” Negan repeated, guiding her toward him so his mouth could cover hers. With
his kisses tempting her into sweet surrender, she found herself getting more comfortable with
everything. With time, she lowered herself completely over him making him growl against her lips
when he filled her. Falling forward, she nuzzled her nose against the side of his neck while he
stroked his fingers against the back of her head. The full feeling of him inside of her was
uncomfortable, but she was taking the time she needed like Negan suggested. Kissing over the
freckles that covered Negan’s shoulder, she clung to him and heard his deep breaths in her ear.
Negan’s hands were caressing over her body and unhurriedly, she attempted to start moving her
hips over him. “You are so perfect.”

“So are you,” she kissed at his chiseled jawline and found that she was eager to be close to him
while Negan’s hands found their way to her hips to held aid her careful movements over him. Their
stares connected and Negan was watching her reaction to things while she moved over him. A
whimper fell from her lips, her head falling forward against his while she got used to the size of
him. It was uncomfortable at first, but the more he touched her and helped her over his body the
better everything began to feel. “Negan.”

“You’re doing so good,” he assured her with a half-smile, his eyebrows furrowing together when
he lowered his head down to look at her movements over him. A purr fell from her lips when
Negan’s palms squeezed firmly at her full bottom to aid in her movement over him. “You’re so
fucking sexy, you know that?”

With Negan’s lips claiming hers, she felt like she was on top of the world with the way he stroked
over her back and touched her. He was whispering compliments, reminding her over and over
again how beautiful he thought she was. Gasping, she felt Negan pulling her in toward his chest
and he rolled her onto her back. Bracing his weight, Negan made sure to kiss her while her arms
hooked around his shoulders. “Tell me if you get uncomfortable.”

“Okay,” she panted against his lips while they skimmed over hers and Negan’s hips started to
slowly roll over her. Each movement would draw his body back before he would thrust forward
again sinking his length into her. Each pull and plunge were unlike anything she had ever felt
before. Yeah, she had sex before, but it didn’t last long and it was over before knew it. With
Negan, everything was drawn out. Each sensation was enhanced and Negan’s incredible body felt
like it was made for only her. Scratching her nails delicately over the planes of his chest, she heard
Negan growl and his lips forcefully pressed over hers again. “More.”

Taking her words as encouragement, Negan’s movements got just a bit faster with a little bit more
force behind them. The tip of his cock was hitting all the right places inside of her and she found
her body tensing up beneath him. Picking up on the way she dropped her head back and the way
her throat tightened, Negan grasped tightly to her and started thrusting into her at such a pace that
made her cry out. Lifting her head to watch his body pumping in and out of hers, she heard him
hush her and urge her to put her head back again.

“Just let it happen,” Negan slurred, hovering his lips over hers and her desperate pants followed.
Clutching tightly to Negan’s body, she cried against his shoulder when she felt her body start to
shake and tremble rocking her to the very core. A hot liquid warmth filled her, her eyes slammed
shut and she held firmly to Negan. “Good girl.”

Broken cries vibrated against the side of his neck and he groaned with her body contracting around
his. Visibly this was the first orgasm she had ever had like this and Negan watched her in awe
while stroking over her face. It took a few moments before she was able to open her eyes and meet
his stare again. Faint pants fell from her throat and she was eager to pull him closer to her, kissing
eagerly over the side of his neck.

“Look at me,” Negan wrapped his fingers around her neck to urge her to look at him and he could
see the lust in her eyes while he stroked over her face with his rough fingertips. Even with him just
looking at her like he was drove her wild with desire. The thrusts of his body inside of her just
enhanced all of it. “Does it feel good sweetheart?”

“Yes,” she whimpered while Negan kept up with his steady thrusts over her, his eyes closing for a
moment when a shuddering breath escaped his lips. Digging her fingertips into the flexing muscle
of his shoulders, she drew a groan from him and Negan’s eyes opened.

Pushing into his chest again, she found herself getting confident as he fell onto his back. A whine
fell from her throat when his body pulled from hers leaving her with an empty feeling that she was
eager to get rid of. Crawling back in over his lap, she pressed her hand into Negan’s chest to make
him lay flat back against the blankets and a surprised expression was over his handsome features.
Grabbing a firm hold of his manhood, she led it back to her body and took him back inside of her.
Crying out when he filled her again, she braced her hands over his chest while she took her time
riding over his length. Negan’s quiet moans filled the air while she did it, getting used to it again
before lowering herself forward. Grasping tightly to Negan’s hands, she pressed them back against
the blankets beside his head while she bounced her hips over his length enjoying the feeling that it
was leaving her with.

“Baby girl,” Negan growled, lifted his head enough to watch her before dropping his head back.
His fingers hooked tightly with hers while she took advantage of his body riding him with
excitement. Winces started to fall from Negan’s throat and he desperately tried to lift up enough to
meet her lips in a kiss. Instead of allowing it, she teased him with the idea and he growled. “Kiss
me.”

“Yes daddy,” she slurred with a satisfied smile with the sounds of their skin smacking filling the air
and a loud, raspy moan escaped Negan’s throat before her lips claimed his. While she was trying to
take advantage of the moment, she could feel Negan’s hips bouncing up to meet her movements. It
drew her to moan out against his mouth before lowering her forehead to his. “You don’t play fair.”

“I know,” he boasted with a smile while his hips continued to meet hers. With her already sensitive
body, she felt her thighs starting to tremor and shake. God, he was working her up to another
orgasm and she knew it. Hell, he knew it obviously by her reactions and his hips smacked up
against her harder. With each pull of his cock from her body and thrust upwards she knew that she
wouldn’t be able to hold back.

“Negan,” she dropped her head against the center of his chest and released his hands. Negan
reached for her hips to grab a tight hold of them to help rock her over his length when her orgasm
started to shake her again. Whimpering out into his chest, she bit at the skin and heard him groan
when she did it. “Jesus.”

“Fuck,” Negan grunted against the side of her neck, halting his thrusts when her body contracted
around his again alerting him to the fact that he got her to another orgasm over him. Grunting, he
rolled her onto her back again and urged her legs to wrap around his waist. Reaching for her hands,
he grasped them tightly with his thick fingers. Lowering his head just above hers, his lips lingered
so he could watch her while he started to roll his hips over hers again. This time his thrusts were
unhurried, but more prominent. “You were worth the wait.”
Skimming his bottom lip over hers, he winced when he felt a jolt fill his veins and he growled
against her lips. Thrust after incredible thrust left her whimpering against his skin and when Negan
buried his head against the side of her neck, she managed to snake one of her hands from his and
wrapped it tightly around his shoulders.

The low rumble of Negan’s moans against the side of her neck and the pulsating of his body inside
of her alerted her to the fact that he had just reached his orgasm, riding it out until the very end.
When he had finished, he lowered in over and her fingers stroked through his wet hair. Cherishing
the warmth and weight of him over her, Y/N knew that this was a big deal for them. There was a
silence between them and she didn’t know if that was a good or bad thing. Turning her head toward
him, she kissed over the side of his neck and listened closely to his breaths. They were like music
to her ears and she loved this. The sounds he was making. The warmth of him over her. The feeling
of him still inside of her after their lovemaking. It was all so phenomenal.

“Now I get the appeal of sex,” she muttered against his flesh and Negan weakly laughed against
the side of her neck causing a chill to run down her spine. “Or maybe it’s just the appeal of having
sex with you.”

“It was good?” Negan lifted his head and saw her nod while her fingertips stroked his wet hair out
of his eyes. With his hazel eyes hooked on hers, she felt like the center of his universe and she
loved that about Negan. When he went to pull his hips away, she shook her head and made him
stay for a moment longer. “Is everything okay?”

“I just want to treasure this moment,” she panted with an exhausted breath, stroking her fingers
over the side of his face and down his chiseled jawline. “You are the most amazing man I’ve ever
laid eyes on. I hope you know that.”

“You take my breath away,” Negan slurred, lifting his right hand to drag his thumb over her full
bottom lip. Kissing at the pad of his finger, she knew that she shouldn’t have been falling this fast
for him. She only agreed to being his girlfriend the night before, but she already felt so much for
him. “You are so fucking perfect.”

“I’m really not Negan,” she lowered her head, but he hushed her and urged her to look back at him.
Negan traced his fingers over her face, palming over the side of her face when he lowered in closer
to her.

“When I’m with you, for the first time everything feels right,” Negan declared with a long sigh, the
warmth of his breath causing her to shudder. “Since the moment you stormed out your front door
into my life that first time I laid eyes on you, all I’ve ever been able to think about is you. You’ve
got me hypnotized by you. Your smile brightens my whole fucking day. I could stare into your
eyes and know that everything is going to be okay because I have you right here in my fucking
arms. To me…you are absolute perfection.”

“Fuck…” she felt herself getting caught up in the emotions of everything and it made her let out a
whimper. Lowering her head, she felt her eyes tearing over and Negan frowned trying to get her to
look at him. “Why are you so fucking perfect?”

“Hey,” Negan stroked his fingers over the side of her face trying to get her to focus on him. “I just
want to make you happy. Whatever it takes. That’s what I want.”

Starting at her forehead, Negan placed gentle kisses over her face, lowering down before meeting
her lips. Kissing him over and over again, she felt like a part of her was breaking. She told herself
she would never have these feelings for someone, yet here she was falling head over heels for
Negan. Originally, this was just supposed to be a small fling, but it was turning into so much more
and she knew the deeper she got into this relationship, the further away from who she really
thought she was deep down she was going to get.

With a final kiss, Negan pulled himself away from her and pulled the condom from his body, tying
it up and reaching for a bag that he had to throw garbage away. When he was done, he lowered
back in beside her and reached for a blanket to wrap themselves up in. Cuddling her closer to him
in his arms, Negan snickered when she nuzzled her head in against the side of his neck.

“Can you do me a favor?” she whispered, enjoying the warmth of him around her.

“What’s that?” Negan questioned, pressing a kiss against her temple. When her head tipped back to
look at him, he gave her a strange expression with the way she laughed. “What?”

“I know you tell Sam everything, but please don’t tell her about this,” she teased him and poked
Negan in the center of the chest hearing Negan groan when she said that. “Oh come on, you told
me you tell that little girl everything.”

“Not everything,” Negan rolled his eyes, dipping his fingers beneath the blankets to tickle at her
sides and it made her swat at his chest to get him away. “I know when to keep my mouth shut
about certain things. I will probably tell her we just spent the end of the night cuddling under the
stars. Which is what we’re doing.”

“Just make sure to leave out the part where we were naked,” she continued to egg him on and he
started to pepper kisses over the side of her neck in a playful manner that left her laughing. After
calming down, she found herself lost thinking about things while she laid in his arms. “So…”

“So…” Negan yawned while she got comfortable laying against the center of his chest.

“Where do I sign up to get married to you?” she stroked her fingers over the center of his chest,
drawing circles over his flesh. When Negan laughed, she knew that he took it as a joke and she
knew that deep down she was kidding, but Negan was too good to be true. While this wasn’t the
life she wanted originally, she knew that she wanted to keep Negan. If anyone else got him from
her, she knew that she would be miserable always knowing what could have been after just this day
alone.

“I’ll ask you in a month if it’s still as magical as it is today,” Negan claimed, stroking his fingers
over her shoulders.

“A lot can happen in a month,” she snorted and Negan shrugged his shoulders. “You may realize
that you hate me by then.”

“No, I’ll never hate you,” Negan insisted with a wrinkle of his nose, his eyes very serious while he
stared down at her. “I don’t think it’s possible. Not when you’ve helped me like you have.”

“I’ve given you nothing but shit since I’ve walked into your life,” she snickered knowing that she
was a bit much, but it was something that Negan denied to hear.

“That’s not true. You’ve awakened something inside of me that’s been gone for a very long time
Y/N. From the moment that you stormed out that door after your father and came into my life that
very first time, the only thing I’ve been able to think about is you. You are always on my mind and
I’m hypnotized by you,” Negan explained to her with a long, drawn out sigh. Maybe he was
repeating himself at this point, but he wanted to dig this in for her. “To me, you are absolutely
perfection and I’m so thankful that we found each other. I haven’t felt this way in a very long time.
I think you are phenomenal woman. You’re fucking gorgeous and I love spending time with you.
When you aren’t with me, I feel lost.”

“Damn,” she felt the emotions of everything getting the best of her. She was falling for Negan and
she was falling fast. It had only been a day since she had agreed to being his girlfriend and here she
was falling harder for the guy. The longer she was with Negan, the more she knew the girl that she
used to be would disappear. She never wanted to have a relationship like this. She never wanted to
be this person, but the longer she was with him she knew the more she would change. When Negan
picked up on the fact that her eyes were tearing over, her stroked over the side of her face and led
her to look at him. “Why do you have to be so fucking amazing?”

“I’m only saying the truth. All I want is you happy,” Negan claimed and she was blown away by
just having him look at her like he was that it made her feel like she was the only woman in the
world. “Why are you crying? I don’t want that.”

“I don’t even know,” she reached for his hand and brought it up to her lips to press a kiss over his
knuckles. “I guess I just never thought people like you existed. That’s why I turned myself away
from the idea of love and something more in my life for so long.”

“And I thought I was done with life, just floating and waiting for things to happen. Other than Sam,
I had nothing in my life,” Negan declared, his thumb tracing over her features as if he was trying to
memorize all of her features. “Now I have you. I have something to look forward to. Something to
make me smile.”

“I don’t know how to feel about you Negan,” she stammered, pulling her face from his fingers and
looked up toward the stars. “I was so mad when I first got home from school. I hated everyone for
what they did to me at school. I was so angry and wanted revenge. I thought it was the worst thing
that happened to me. Now…”

“Now…?” Negan noticed that she froze up and she dramatically shrugged her shoulders.

“Now I think it’s the best thing that could have happened for me because it brought you in my
life,” she answered knowing that it made her feel a little pathetic to say that, but when she did say it
Negan’s gorgeous smile expanded over his handsome features.

Without saying anything more, he lowered closer in beside her and wrapped his fingers around her
jaw to have her meet his lips in a kiss. Over and over again they kissed well into the night.
Honestly, she couldn’t complain. Kissing Negan was incredible and she loved it. It made her feel
at peace with the world and it was an amazing feeling. Nothing felt more at home than it did in
Negan’s arms.

When they finally did get comfortable enough to rest, she was surprised how easily she fell asleep
in Negan’s arms. By the time she woke up in the morning, the sun had just started to rise and she
couldn’t believe that she had been relaxed enough to fall asleep in the middle of nowhere. There
was no point in her life where she ever thought she would have been okay with this in the past.

Turning in Negan’s arms, she took her time to watch him sleep. He was so peaceful looking in his
sleep and she realized that this was something she could honestly get used to. Waking up in his
arms like this and being able to watch him.

Stroking over his rough features, she was surprised that he was still able to sleep while she did it,
but she had the need to just touch him. To be close to him. By the time he finally started to stir, a
small grin pressed in over his lips and he smiled. With his eyes slowly coming to an open, she felt
her heart skip a beat when Negan’s eyes focused on her.
“Breathtaking,” Negan whispered brushing his fingers through her hair leaning in just enough to
delicately lay a kiss over her lips.

“I was thinking the same thing about you,” she hummed against his mouth, enjoying the sensation
of him against her.

“I was worried you might have been changing your mind about this whole thing with us after
sleeping,” Negan leaned his head in closer to her, nuzzling his nose against the side of her neck.

“I’d be crazy to let you go,” she grabbed a handful of his hair and pressed a kiss against his head.
“God, I hate to say that, but I’m not ready for this to be over. What about you?”

“Oh, I’m in this for the long-haul sweetheart,” Negan grumbled, softly nibbling at the side of her
neck before pulling her in closely to him. The sound of rustling was heard above them and she felt
Negan jump when he saw something. Lifting her head, she could see just beyond them there was a
deer there staring out at them. “We have a voyeur watching us.”

“God,” she laughed feeling Negan pulling the blankets in closer to them. “It’s beautiful.”

“I think it’s a baby,” Negan informed her, carefully getting up from the ground and she sat up
slowly when Negan reached for the bag of snacks they hadn’t touched the night before. When
Negan pulled out an apple, she could see him reaching for his jeans to pull them on quickly before
heading carefully toward the deer. “Hey there beautiful.”

“Careful it doesn’t kick the shit out of you,” she warned watching Negan holding out the apple the
closer he got to the deer. When he stopped walking, the deer seemed to debate whether to run the
other way, but when it took a sniff of the apple it grabbed it cautiously from Negan’s hand and
scrambled backwards. It stopped just at the tree line and she got up from the ground, pulling the
blanket with her to watch the deer with Negan. “Well, that went better than I thought.”

“Right?” Negan chuckled, wrapping his arms around her shoulders to pull her in closer to his body.
“We can stick around for a few, but I think we should get going soon. This is a popular area for
families during the day and I don’t think you want to get caught…well, like this.”

“God no,” she laughed hearing him snicker against the side of her neck before kissing over it again
and again. “I swear, I have done things with you I never thought I would do in my lifetime.”

“And our relationship just started,” Negan reminded her, enjoying how she seemed to like being
wrapped up in his arms. “Just picture what else could happen the longer it goes on.”

“I can only imagine,” she retorted, turning in his arms. Staring up at Negan, she touched his face
and realized that this was perfect all together. The first date, the first time sleeping together…
everything was amazing and she couldn’t have thought of a better way for all of this to happen. She
was just thankful for all of it.

The only thing that she could have never prepared for was how much she ended up liking Negan
and how good it actually felt to be around him. She was starting to get addicted to the feeling and
she just wanted to keep feeling it. And she wasn’t quite sure if that was a good or bad thing yet.
 Chapter 10
Chapter Summary

After her night with Negan, Y/N finds herself falling fast for him which makes her
question all the things she felt before.

Chapter Notes

Thanks to anyone who reads this for sticking around. I'm sorry real life has been so
busy that this has taken me a while. I promise I will have the next chapter up soon!

There wasn’t a lot of things in life that surprised Y/N, but the way that she was feeling right now…
that surprised her. After her night with Negan, that’s all she could think about. God, it was
incredible. No one had ever gone so out of their way for her like Negan had. With Negan, she felt
special. She felt on top of the world and nothing felt like it would bring her down. No one ever
accomplished to make her feel that way.

While they were stopped at a red light, Negan’s right hand was settled on her knee and it made her
smile. Stretching out her fingers, she curled them around Negan’s and squeezed them tightly within
her grasp. Lifting her gaze to Negan, she could see that he was staring over at her. The way he
looked at her warmed her heart. There was something in the way that Negan looked at her that
made her feel like the only woman in the world. It was a feeling she never knew she craved. All
she could keep thinking about was how unbelievable the last day had actually been for her.

It made her sad that they were almost home, but it also made her excited for their future adventures
together. Never in her life did she ever think she would feel this way for someone. Being wrapped
up so incredibly much by someone would have scared her in the past. Whenever she looked at
Negan, her heart fluttered and everything in the world felt right.

There must have been something in the way she was staring at him that gave away she was deep in
thought. It made a smirk press in over Negan’s lips and his eyebrows bounced. When he grinned at
her, she felt her cheeks flush over and she turned her gaze away from him.

Without saying anything, Negan lifted her up hand up lazily to bring it to his mouth to deposit a
faint kiss over the back of it. When her eyes connected with his again, he smiled one of those
ridiculously charming smiles. One of those big toothy grins that brought attention to those already
so gorgeous dimples. Nothing made her swoon more than those dimples she so often found herself
staring at. It was strange how often Negan smiled, but damn it…she loved it. His smiles were
contagious.

When Negan gave her a wink, it made her think about the person that she used to be. That part of
her was still there and it wanted her to regret her decisions she made with him. It wanted her to
think that the emotions and feeling she was having for Negan were wrong, but she didn’t. For so
long she had this image of a stereotype of the kind of woman that she needed to be. Constantly in
the past, her parents dug in this idea to her that with her career, she couldn’t have love. School and
the career came first. It was a constant reminder that had be repeated to her time and time again. It
just became a rule for her, but maybe Negan was right. The expectations her parents had for her
were unrealistic. They thought that her having a relationship with someone would have her
throwing her life away. But with Negan, she didn’t feel like that would ever happen. What was
better than having everything she wanted while also having someone who cared for her like Negan
did? Wasn’t the best of both worlds a good thing? Even at her best with school, she never felt this
happy. With Negan’s support emotionally she felt like she could take on the world while still being
happy about it. She genuinely felt that she could achieve greatness with Negan’s help. Now, she
didn’t feel alone.

“What’s going on in that beautiful mind of yours? You’re either really deep in thought or…?”
Negan tried to read her and she realized that she must have been so lost within herself for him to
notice. “You keep staring at me a certain way and it’s making me wonder if something is wrong or
I have something in my teeth.”

“No, I just am trying to determine if you are something my conscience came up with in order to
make me a happier person or if you’re actually real,” she answered almost in a teasing tone, but
often she wondered if this was some kind of daydream she came up with. Negan was too good to
be true.

Reaching for her hand, Negan placed it over the center of his chest to let her feel the steady
heartbeat beneath her fingertips, “Does that feel real enough for you?”

“I look at you and you are the realest thing I’ve ever had in my whole life,” she explained and her
answer made him chuckle. What she just said to Negan, that was something in the past she would
have rolled her eyes at hearing. If someone would have said that she would have thought the
person saying it was stupid. But being with Negan, she understood it now. How fast she was
falling for Negan probably wasn’t good. It was just something she couldn’t help. “I’m still trying
to wrap my head around why someone like you would want someone like me.”

“I just do. I think you’re perfect,” Negan insisted trying to keep his attention on the road when he
thought of what to say to her. The light turned green and he quiet for a moment, trying to gather his
own thoughts. “I’m the one with the baggage. I’m just lucky that you finally decided to give this
whole dating thing a chance between the two of us.”

“It’s hard to tell you no. You were so damn persistent and I’m glad that I did do this,” she declared
with a proud smile thinking about the night that they shared together. “You…you’re incredible.”

“Is that your way of saying you liked the sex?” Negan teased her with a wrinkle of his nose, giving
her a quick glance with his mischievous hazel eyes. A small chuckle fell from her throat and he
watched her cheeks flush over.

“Obviously,” she felt him pat her on the thigh before caressing over it. A shuddering breath fell
from her throat with the closeness of him and she bit down on her bottom lip. It was insane how
fast her body reacted to just a simple touch from Negan. “I guess I should be worried if the sex
sucked for you since I’m the one that doesn’t have as much experience.”

“Last night wasn’t about the sex. It was about the two of us trusting each other. It was us
connecting on a level that shows we’re open to something more. It was something a little bit more
than just sex,” Negan stated with a long sigh and she squeezed tightly to his fingers loving to hear
him say something like that. “Last night was beautiful.”

“Are you saying you made love to me Negan?” she inquired knowing that’s where is sounded like
his comment was going. It almost looked like it embarrassed Negan when she asked him that and
he sucked in a sharp breath.

“I guess that depends on if me saying that creeps you out or not. If you are open to the idea, yeah,
we made love under the stars,” Negan suggested, his right eyebrow arching when he stole a quick
glance at her. “If the idea of me making love to you creeps you out, then no…it was just something
more than sex.”

“You’re adorable. You know that?” she was in awe of him being nervous while he talked about
them making love. When all of this started with Negan, this wasn’t a version of him that she
thought she would ever see. She didn’t know why, but their first few interactions made her think
their encounters would be like some cheesy porno film. “First you come at me originally acting
like this sexual deviant that is going to fuck my brains out and make me hate the day that I met
you, but you’re really this gigantic teddy bear that just wants to be loved.”

“Can I at least be a gigantic sexy teddy bear that is really good at sex, but still wants to be loved?”
Negan’s face twisted and it made her laugh upon hearing him ask of that. Negan had an image and
she could tell that. Negan probably was often that sexually hungry person that she was talking
about, but with her it seemed things were different.

“Yes, you can be my sexy teddy bear,” she agreed to it and Negan’s deep raspy laugh filled the car.
“You’re also my extremely sexy sugar daddy.”

“In public I’ll be that, but between the two of us…I’m your teddy bear,” Negan winked as he
pulled into the driveway to his home. When the car turned off, she glanced over her shoulder to
make sure that her parents weren’t there to see them if she got out. Negan’s eyes were hooked on
hers noticing the anxious expression over her face. “What happens the day that your parents find
out that we’re dating? It’s going to happen eventually. I’m surprised they haven’t noticed you
sneaking over here to be with me.”

“I’d rather not think about that right now,” she explained with a frown. “It has nothing to do with
you, but everything to do with them. My dad will not handle it very well. Trust me.”

“I think your parents need to stop treating you like a teenager. You are in your final year of
undergraduate school. You should be able to date who you want without your parents getting
involved,” Negan pointed out and he could see the way she tilted her head to the side. It was
obvious in the way she always got nervous at the idea of her parents seeing them together that her
parents still scared her. They ran her life for so long that she was just nervous about how they
would react to things. “I know your parents have controlled you most of your life, but you’re a big
girl. Who you are dating is none of their business.”

“I know, but…” she went to respond and Negan reached out to stroke over the side of her face with
his rough fingertips. Drawing her to him, Negan’s lips meshed in over hers and instead of worrying
if her parents would see them she kissed Negan back. Parting her lips, she allowed his tongue to
brush up against hers and whimpered when he did it.

“Life gets a lot better when you stop worrying about what everyone else will think of you,” Negan
slurred against her lips when he pulled away enough to stare into her eyes. “You are your own
woman. You’re perfect. You’re beautiful and you are a badass. Anything you put your mind to, I
promise you can achieve. You don’t have to worry about them anymore.”

“God, where were you all my life?” she reached up to brush her fingers through Negan’s dark hair.
If she had someone like him in her life before, she knew without a doubt that she would have had
more confidence in herself. Her parents were always in the back of her mind, but if she would have
met Negan sooner maybe a lot of the negative emotions she was going through right now would
have never existed.

“Come on baby, I’m hungry,” Negan deposited a quick kiss over her lips before getting out of the
car. Quickly, Negan moved around the car to help her out before leading her toward the house.
When Negan got through the door, she pushed him into the house and then slammed him against
the wall. A grunt fell from Negan’s throat when he felt her pulling at the belt in his pants. “What
are you doing?”

“I still never got to give you that blowjob that you won in the game of laser tag,” she reminded him
and an amused smirk pressed in over Negan’s features. With an arrogant bob of his head, Negan
reached for her hands and he shook his head. A hushing sound fell from his lips when she gave him
a frown. “What now?”

“I don’t want us to be one of those couples. I don’t want us to just have sex all the time,” Negan
answered her with a loud sigh. “We’ll still have sex, but I want us to be more than this Y/N. Plus, I
told you. I’m hungry.”

“You’re still holding that sex over me, huh?” she bawled up the material of Negan’s shirt at the
center of his chest and let out a disappointed breath. Shaking his head, Negan kept his hazel eyes
locked on hers and smiled. “Here I was thinking that was all over now that we were together.”

“I’m still going to pamper my beautiful girl,” Negan curled his finger in underneath her chin to lift
her gaze to his. Tipping down, he teased his lips over hers and a wicked smile pressed over his
handsome features. “I just want to make things special because you deserve nothing, but the best.”

“Which is you. You’re the best,” she tipped up on her toes to bring their lips together so they could
kiss. Negan hummed in approval before brushing her hair back behind her ear. “But I guess I can
honor your wishes and keep my hands to myself for now.”

“Good girl,” Negan snickered, reaching for her hand to lead her toward the kitchen. “I’m thinking I
want waffles this morning. What do you think?”

“Sounds good,” she followed him into the kitchen while he made her sit down so he could pamper
her and make her breakfast.

It was hard not to stare and admire him while he went out of his way for her. No one would ever go
this above and beyond for her. So the fact that Negan did really surprised her. It was something
that was easy to get used to, but it wasn’t something that she expected. After sleeping with Negan,
she knew she was falling and potentially too fast.

After they slept together, she had automatically assumed that things would have been strange
between them, but it really wasn’t. Negan was exactly the same and that was a good thing. He was
very sweet, caring and like he was before. Instead of being distanced, which she pictured could
have happened, he wasn’t. There was a fear that she would have felt uncomfortable about their
relationship, but she didn’t. She just felt more in awe of him which surprised her all the more.

When she had lost her virginity before Negan, she was repulsed with herself for having sex and
hated the person that she did it with. After sleeping with Negan, she felt closer to him and didn’t
hate that it didn’t bother her. Things were moving fast between them, but it felt right.

They had their breakfast and afterwards shared a shower together, but Negan stood his ground
when it came to the no sex. She was allowed to touch Negan, but it was hard not wanting to be
with Negan. Being with him felt good. The attention he gave her and the passion they shared
together felt better than anything she had ever experienced.
While she wanted to have sex again with Negan, she also enjoyed just getting to spend time with
him. With most people she found herself bored being around them. Maybe that made her an
asshole, but she didn’t care. A lot of people didn’t keep her interest. With him, it was easy to be
able to enjoy being with him. Getting to learn more about his past and him in general appealed to
her.

Their day just consisted of them doing random odds and ends together. They just relaxed. They
watched television. They talked about their lives. Had dinner and at the end of the night they were
headed to bed together. Before they could finish getting ready for bed though, Negan had gotten a
call from Sam who wanted to talk to him before going to sleep.

Negan was sitting on the corner of the bed talking with Sam and Y/N sat watching the way Negan
reacted to talking to his niece. She got a kick out of the fact that her boyfriend’s best friend was his
twelve-year-old niece. Sam had called when they were getting ready for bed, so Negan didn’t get
to change into pajamas, but Y/N had. This was something special about Negan. His niece meant
everything to him and she loved that about him.

“I’m not lying to you,” Negan snickered, giving Y/N a glance over his shoulder and he made a
dramatic expression. “She told me herself that she liked the whole thing. You weren’t wrong in
suggesting taking her to the place. Why would I lie to you? We went on the air balloon after and
then laid under the stars the rest of the night.”

When Negan laughed, Y/N was charmed with the whole interaction. The fact he would talk about
her to his niece really touched her heart. Considering his niece was very special to him and she
knew that his family knowing about her was a big deal.

“Yes dear,” Negan pulled the phone from his ear and held it out toward Y/N. Her eyes surveyed
the phone wondering what Negan wanted. “She doesn’t believe me, so she wants to talk to you
herself. I don’t get why she thinks I would lie about something like that, but…”

Once she grabbed the phone from Negan, he dramatically threw his hands up in the air with a
shrug and headed for his dresser to pull out some pajama pants. When he headed toward the
bathroom, her eyes followed his movements. Talking to Sam was a bit daunting, but she wasn’t
about to say no considering who it was.

“Hello?” she found herself stretching out to watch Negan further while he pulled his shirt from his
body and her throat went dry watching him.

“Holy shit, you really are there!” Sam’s amused voice filled the other side of the phone and it
made Y/N laugh hearing it. “I don’t know why, I just kind of felt like he might have been lying to
me so that way I didn’t feel bad for him.”

“Why would he do that?” she questioned, her nose wrinkling when she turned her attention away
from the bathroom when she heard Sam say that.

“I worry him about him being alone and sometimes I just thought he was telling me things to make
me not worry as much about him. Things weren’t exactly the best for him after Aunt Lucille died,
so to hear that you two are having fun and super happy just…I don’t know, I guess it makes me
happy,” Sam explained and it made a warmth flood Y/N’s chest when she thought about what
Negan’s niece was saying. “It’s the first time I’ve heard him sound happy in a long time. So, thank
you.”

“You don’t have to thank me kiddo. I should be thanking you,” she proclaimed seeing that Negan
moved to the door to watch her while he brushed his teeth. He was leaning against the door
shirtless and in his pajama pants while she talked to Sam. “It was apparently your idea to go to that
place we went first and that was the most fun I’ve had in a long time.”

“Even after playing laser tag?” Sam teased making Y/N chuckle when she thought back to how
seriously Negan took the game. “He gets kind of intense about that whole game. Try having him
take you and your friends to play laser tag. At this point, I just always say it’s going to be me and
him against everyone. Most of my friends will laugh because they think they are going to kill us.
They don’t realize he's my secret weapon. After we absolutely crush them, they never want to play
again with us.”

“Yeah, he is a bit of laser tag pro,” she admitted hearing Negan snort before heading back into the
bathroom to continue to brush his teeth, “but I had a lot of fun with it. I can’t recall the last time
that I had as much fun with anyone compared to the fun I’ve had with Negan.”

“That makes me happy to hear,” Sam admitted with a tired yawn and it made Y/N smirk. Taking a
glance at the time, she knew it was late and wondered how late Sam’s mothers allowed her to be
up. “I heard you weren’t a fan of the air balloon, but you liked the laying under the stars together?”

“The idea of falling out of the air balloon terrified me, yes,” Y/N recalled and it made Sam giggle
on the other end. “I just kept picturing myself as a pancake and yeah, that was not my bravest
moment. I tell you that. But the night under the stars was very romantic and I enjoyed it a lot.”

“It sounds romantic,” Sam confessed with another yawn and Y/N heard on the other end of the
phone what she assumed to be one of Sam’s mothers urging her to go to sleep. Sam grumbled and
obviously didn’t like being told what to do. “So when am I going to spend some time with the two
of you again?”

“Well, I’m comfortable with you coming over any time you want. I think Negan and I will be
spending more time together and I would have so much more fun going to the place we did with
you I think,” she stated knowing that she had told Negan the same thing the day before, but it was
true. “I think you would be able to probably help me when it came to the whole laser tag thing. Us
girls against him.”

“Yeah, we’d like to think so, but he’d still kill us,” Sam giggled making Y/N laugh when Sam said
it the way she did. Again one of Sam’s mothers was yelling at her to go to bed. Sam called out
something and then came back to the phone. “But I would love to do that with the two of you! It
was nice talking to you Y/N, but would you be okay with giving Negan the phone back? I have to
say goodnight before I get grounded for being up too late on the phone. My mom is having a freak
attack.”

“Sure thing kiddo. It was nice talking with you,” Y/N snapped her fingers to get Negan’s attention
when he finished up brushing his teeth. “Sam wants to say goodnight. Her mom wants her off the
phone or she’s going to get in trouble.”

“That would be Jane,” Negan informed her with a grunt and a roll of his eyes. When Negan said
the name, she recalled all the information Sam fed her when she was here the first time. Elaina was
Lucille’s sister and she was the calm on. Jane was the uptight mother that they spoke about. When
Negan accepted the phone, she got comfortable in the bed and watched Negan pace. “Goodnight
kiddo. I love you. I’ll talk to you soon. Bye honey.”

When he hung up, he turned to face Y/N and he could see the way that she was staring at him with
a smirk, “What?”

“The two of you are just cute,” she insisted and cuddled her head in closer to the pillow. Negan
turned the lights off and crawled in over her on the bed. Reaching for her wrists, Negan pinned
them down beside her head while he hooked his fingers with hers. “I just think it’s charming you
are like this tattooed, badass looking guy and your best friend is a twelve-year-old.”

“Well, that’s your first mistake. Sam is quite the badass herself. I wouldn’t fuck with that little
girl,” Negan warned with a playfulness in his tone while he smiled down at her. Hovering his lips
over hers, Negan teased her with the hints of a kiss, but didn’t allow her one. “I’m not embarrassed
to have a twelve-year-old be my best friend.”

“You shouldn’t be, it’s adorable,” she lifted up to try and kiss Negan, but he pulled back enough to
let out a snort when she whined. “The two of you together are something people wish they could
have with their own kids.”

“Right,” Negan’s smile slowly faded and he swallowed down hard before biting into his bottom
lip. “So you haven’t had any changes in your decisions with dating me? I was kind of waiting the
first forty-eight hours to make sure you didn’t have a panic attack over this whole thing.”

“I should be having a panic attack, but nope,” she noticed that Negan allowed one of her hands to
be released and she reached up to trace her fingers over the side of his masculine face. “I’m very
much happy with the decision that I made.”

“Me too,” Negan slurred, finally lowering down to delicately trace his lips over hers. It caused her
to shudder and over time the kiss got more passionate. Hooking her fingers into Negan’s hair, she
felt him getting more comfortable over her and his tired eyes looked her over when they finally
parted. “You’re beautiful.”

“Thank you,” she gave him a wink and it made him smirk. Peppering a few final kisses over her
lips, Negan took his time to stare at her under him. There was something in the way he looked at
her that gave her chills. Adjusting his weight, Negan dropped down beside her and wrapped his
arm around her waist when she turned onto her side. Grunting, he realized he hadn’t turned off the
light that was beside the bed. Lifting up, he outstretched his arm and tugged at the light to get it
turned off.

Getting comfortable for bed was so much easier than it was before. Most nights, all it took for her
to fall asleep was Negan wrapping her up in his arms and she was out like a light. Being with him
she felt comfortable and safe. It felt amazing being wrapped up in his arms, but while she liked
this…her mind was other places. Like where they were the night before. Biting into her bottom lip,
she thought about what it felt like to have Negan inside of her and making love to her. It was a
sensation that she craved again. It was drawing her to have goosebumps just at the thought of it.
While she knew that Negan said he didn’t want to focus on sex, she couldn’t help yearning for just
another time between them. Being this close to him had her body on fire.

Knowing that she promised to try to keep her hands to herself, she pulled her hips a bit forward.
The warmth radiating from his body behind her was definitely having its effects on her. With
Negan’s deep breaths filling the air, it was obvious that he had fallen asleep already. Which made
her to cuss to herself because she wished he may have been having the same reaction to this that
she was. Closing her eyes, she attempted to force herself to think about something different. She
counted. Hell, that wasn’t working. Sucking at her bottom lip, she thought of trying to think of
school things to help her, but that wasn’t helping either. Nothing was. This wasn’t exactly
something she could control.

Oh hell. What was the worst that could happen? Negan could tell her no and then she would be
forced to cool it?
Looking over her shoulder, she watched Negan sleeping, but her promiscuous side was getting the
best of her. Sliding her hips back, she purposely brushed her bottom in over his groin and hummed
to herself when she did it. Taking things slow at first, she took her time rocking her bottom over
him. Watching his reactions over her shoulder while he slept was turning her on all the more.
Originally, she wondered if Negan was even going to wake up. He wasn’t lying when he told her
that he was tired. Yet, his body was reacting to her movements. The sound of his breathing hitched
and she felt him tense up behind her when he finally woke up.

Instead of fighting with her, he stayed still and she wondered if he was attempting to pretend that
he was still sleeping. Pushing harder back against him, she heard a growl escape his throat and his
head lowered down to press a kiss against the side of her neck.

“You are relentless,” Negan slurred while she continued to rub herself up against him. The pressure
she was using was much harder than that of what she started with. Sliding his palm in over the side
of her hip drew him to moan when she ground back harder against him. “You were going to do this
until you got what you wanted. Huh?”

“I’m good like that,” she turned her head so Negan’s lips could brush over hers. With his mouth
eagerly covering hers, she knew that she could feel his cock hard against her ass while she took no
time in continuing to draw herself back against him. Cooing into Negan’s mouth when his tongue
brushed between her lips, she knew that this was probably a battle she was winning which excited
her. Gasping, she felt Negan’s hands tugging roughly at the material of her pajama pants while still
keeping her on her side in front of him. The material stuck a bit, but Negan was determined to get
them low enough to where he wanted.

“I think you’re very fucking naughty if you ask me,” Negan rumbled, pulling his lips from hers
while nipping seductively at her bottom lip. She let him move her where he wanted on the bed.
They were both on their sides, facing away from each other, but she was eager to move in whatever
way he wanted her. Roughly, he pulled her hips back as close to him as he could. His masculinity
was obvious beneath the material of his pajamas as it pressed against her bottom, but that’s not
what he was focusing on. His arm curled around her hips, urging one of her thighs up just enough
so he could caress his rough fingertips over her clitoris. “I think you need to be punished. Here I am
trying to sleep and get some rest. You just won’t allow that, will you?”

“Negan,” she whimpered out his name feeling his fingers tracing the length of her body before
thrusting one of his long, slender digits firmly into her body. Her eyes slammed shut when Negan
inserted a second. Over and over again he thrust them inside of her, curling his fingers just right to
hit the perfect spot. The friction from his palm rubbing over her clitoris was causing her thighs to
twitch. Crying out, Negan seemed to nip harder at her jawline and she clutched tightly to his
pajama pants. “Negan!”

“Nope,” Negan pulled his fingers away from her body, his thick laughter teasing against the side of
her neck when he denied her an orgasm. A whine escaped her throat and he let out a proud sound.
“You won’t let me sleep. I won’t let you cum.”

“Please,” she panted, reaching for his hand to try to lead it back toward her core again. “I’m sorry.”

“You like daddy’s long fingers inside of you?” Negan questioned and she immediately nodded.
The warmth of his breath against the back of her neck caused her to shudder. A chill ran down her
spine and hearing him talk like that sent a flooding warmth to her core. “Say it.”

“I love daddy’s fingers inside of me,” she repeated what he wanted to hear and soon enough his
fingers were back inside of her, pumping away. Shuddering when Negan’s warm breath pressed in
over her ear, she kept her eyes closed and listened to his loud breathing. Occasionally he would
nibble at her earlobe, her jawline, her neck…little places that would drive her absolutely wild while
he pleasured her with his fingers.

“Do you like the way that feels baby? Do you like daddy pampering you?” Negan slurred against
her earlobe before pressing a teasing kiss over her flesh. “Do you want to cum all over daddy’s
fingers?”

“Yes!” she cried out, her head falling back and resting against his collarbone when a flood of
warmth filled her body. Reaching down to grasp at Negan’s wrist, she knew that she was desperate.
Tensing up, she wanted to chase after the orgasm that he was building up inside of her, but a loud
whimper escaped her throat when he pulled his fingers from her again. Negan was working her
right up to the point where she was about to cum only to stop. “What the hell Negan?”

“I told you that you were a bad girl that needed to be punished,” Negan reminded her, lifting his
fingers up to his lips to look them over. A wicked smirk pressed in over his tired, handsome
features before he took the tips of them between his lips. Sucking at them in a seductive manner
made her moan just at the sight while she stared back at him over her shoulder. Reaching back, she
tugged at his hair to get him closer to her so her mouth could meet his and he hummed against her
lips. “Do you want to have that orgasm baby?”

“So bad,” she purred when his tongue swept at the inside of her bottom lip which drew her to shake
against him.

“Then you have to work for it,” Negan bucked his hips forward against her bottom and she cried
out knowing that her body was already shaking in his arms with him spooning her from behind.
“You can do whatever you want, you just can’t leave the position you are in now.”

“I can do whatever I want? That means I can use you in whatever way I please?” she excitedly tried
to gather the details. Her response made an amused smirk tug at his lips when she looked over her
shoulder at him. Nodding once, she let out a shuddering breath trying to determine how she was
going to get things the way she wanted. “I just have to stay on my side?”

“Yes baby girl,” Negan growled, nipping at her jawline when she reached back to grab at his
pajama pants. Dipping her hand beneath the waistband, her palm wrapped around Negan’s solid
cock and she unhurriedly traced her fingers over his length. When she reached the tip, she felt the
precum collecting at the tip and it made her smile. “You like that?”

“You know I do,” she purred with the warmth of his breath at the side of her neck. Releasing his
erection, she attempted to pull the material down his hips with her free hand. When she was having
trouble, Negan lifted his hips to help her. Getting the material just down below his hips, she bit at
her bottom lip while stealing a glance behind her. The length of his masculinity traced over her
bottom and she eagerly reached back to grasp at his body again. His thick cock was completely
solid. The veins were prominent and she was in awe of him. “You know, you clearly want this just
as bad as I do?”

“Oh, he does for sure. Me, I was sleeping,” Negan snicked, nuzzling his nose against the back of
her neck when she led the tip of his erection to tease it over her most intimate parts. It drew his
eyes to close and he grunted. “Now that I’m awake, of course I want what he wants.”

“I thought so,” she was amused with his reaction, licking at her lips while she traced the head of his
cock through her wet folds. “I hope you realize the control you gave me here. Full control of this
big guy.”

“Condom first,” Negan pointed toward the nightstand after opening his eyes and she immediately
shook her head. Snapping his fingers, he winced when she continued to tease him over the length of
her body. “What do you mean no?”

“You just said I can do what I want with you, but I can’t leave the position I’m in. I want you
inside of me like this,” she slurred and Negan’s eyes narrowed, his pupils dilating with desire. The
way he was looking at her made chills run down her spine. “Are you going to go back on your own
rules?”

“Touché,” Negan grumbled, his tongue clicking against the top of his mouth while keeping his
stare locked on hers. “I guess I can’t go back on my word now, can I? What kind of man would
that make me?”

Dragging her tongue over her bottom lip, she chuckled before lining up the root to his masculinity
with her entrance. Negan’s Adam’s apple bounced in his throat when she pushed her hips back over
him making him immediately moan upon her warmth surrounding him. A gasp fell from her throat
when she pushed her hips further back over his hard cock taking maybe a little more of him than
she was prepared for. She was wet enough, but that didn’t change the fact he was still big.

“Fuck me…” Negan groaned from behind her and she looked over her shoulder to see that he was
glancing down between them to see his length sinking into her. His palm reached down to squeeze
at her bottom and she took notice of the way he was breathing. A surprised sound fell from her
throat when he swatted playfully at her bottom. “That’s essentially what you’re going to do, right?
Fuck yourself with my cock?”

“Yes,” she didn’t have much of a smart remark when Negan’s hand snaked up and around her to
caress up underneath her shirt to squeeze at her full breast. He gave her permission, so essentially,
that’s exactly what she was going to do. Lifting enough, she helped Negan pull her shirt from her
body and the cool air around them caused her to tremor.

It took a minute for her to get accustomed to him. While she wanted to tell herself she could jump
right into this, this was still the second time she had slept with Negan and she had to ease herself
into things. Get used to the fullness that she was feeling with him inside of her.

“Do you like the way that tight, wet pussy feels?” she used her dirty talk, making his eyes raise up
to her and his lips were agape. The sound of his loud breathing filled the air around them. While
the first time was more romantic and was them making love, this was very much a dirtier
experience between them. “Much better than it did with that condom, right?”

“You are so fucking naughty,” Negan slurred with a wrinkle of his nose and he pressed his head in
closer to her. Adjusting behind her, Negan pressed himself up against her back which led a
significant amount of his cock to be buried deep inside of her. “Fuck.”

“Negan,” she reached for his thigh to dig her fingers into the warmth of his flesh. Crying out, she
took in the sensation of him filling her and she never realized how much she would actually enjoy
it. Negan bit at her jawline, his growl falling from his throat when her hand caressed down his
thigh. There wasn’t much movement between them yet, but just having him inside of her felt
amazing. “You feel so good.”

With an uneasiness, she rolled her hips back and took him further into her before pulling her hips
forward. The sound that Negan make drew chills to fill her entire body and while she wasn’t
exactly sure how to do this right in this positioning, she was finding the way that things felt good
for her. Negan wasn’t lying when he told her that she had to work for it. He wasn’t moving other
than keeping his hand settled in over her hip while kissing over her jawline.
“Fuck,” Negan grunted when she found a movement that seemed to work for the both of them.
Clutching to Negan’s thigh and using her grasp at the side of the bed helped her rock herself over
his cock. “Damn baby girl you really want that orgasm, don’t you?”

The smacking of their skin filled the air and Negan’s faint moans were in tune with her cries while
she used his body in the best way she could in the position that they were in. Nuzzling his nose
against the side of her neck, Negan grunted against her flesh and it made her tremble. She wished
the rules weren’t that she had to stay in this position, but she was making the most use of it that she
could.

“You really wanted that dick,” Negan chuckled feeling his body tensing up and he looked down to
watch her body sink down over his length down to the base and then pull up repeatedly. It was
surprising how well she took him with it just being her second time with him. “Fuck…fucking…”

A whine escaped her parted lips when Negan nipped at her sensitive flesh. The warmth from her
movements started radiating into her belly and flooded its way out through the rest of her, “please
Negan…”

“You’re almost there,” Negan encouraged her noticing that she was shaking while her fingertips
dug into his flesh. Noticing that she was slowing down, Negan started bucking his hips forward to
meet her thrusts back onto his erection. Each movement had her mewling out in delight until he felt
her tight walls contracting around him. When she clearly reached her orgasm, she went to pull her
hips away from him in a moment of pure ecstasy, but Negan kept her where she was so he could
experience her orgasm around his cock. “There you go…good girl.”

After allowing her a moment to come down from the high of her orgasm, Negan kept her where she
was while pampering her with kisses over her neck and over her jawline. A gasp fell from her throat
when Negan pulled his body from hers and then pinned her underneath him. A thin layer of sweat
covered Negan’s body and his arrogant smile expanded over his features. Negan’s wet hair was in
his eyes and a whine fell from her throat when his flesh smacked up against hers. One fluid thrust
and he was inside of her completely, filling her to the brim. “One time sleeping with me and you’re
already addicted to my cock.”

A crack of a smile tugged at the corners of her lips as Negan reached for her legs to put them over
his shoulders. With his rough palms settling in over her bottom, she whimpered when he started
thrusting into her again and again. Tossing her head back, she knew that her body was already so
sensitive that it wouldn’t take much for Negan to get her to another orgasm. With the friction of his
groin smacking up against her clitoris and his thick body stretching her in ways she never felt
before, it had her crying out in absolute bliss. Tossing her head back, she reached for Negan’s
wrists and wrapped her fingers tightly around them.

“Negan,” she cried out his name, opening her eyes enough to see that Negan was smiling as her
body started to shake when he got her to another orgasm in no time. That was the look of a proud
man. He knew he caused it and fuck he was cocky, but she loved it. Her second orgasm was
intensified and it left her breathless.

Lowering her legs, Negan pressed in over her and she desperately clung to his shoulders. Kissing at
the side of his neck, she felt his powerful movements over her and she was surprised just how good
this felt with him too. It was definitely something she would have to get used to, but her body liked
it and it liked it a lot. Negan was big and she felt it. Especially today. Dragging her right hand up,
she sank her fingers into Negan’s hair. The breaths escaping Negan’s throat became more desperate
and soon they became pants.

“I’m almost there,” he alerted her, his nose nuzzling against the side of her neck. With his groans
vibrating against the side of her neck, she dragged her nails down his back which drew him to
wince. Cupping his bottom in her palm, she appreciated the flesh flexing and relaxing beneath her
touch while he pounded up against her. “Shit.”

In a hurry, he pulled his hips back to leave her with an empty feeling. The warmth from his release
covered her lower abdomen while she clung tightly to him, not ready to let him go. Negan buried
his nose against the side of her neck, his loud breathing causing chills to fill her entire body. The
room was spinning around her and she felt like she was in a state of euphoria. What Negan had
brought her to was absolute bliss. Her heart was pounding away inside of her chest. Everything was
tingling and she ached, but God it felt good.

Negan lowered in over her, cuddling his head against her shoulder while he caught his breath and
she found herself stroking her fingers at the bottom of his neck teasing at the short curls of hair that
were there, “Thank you.”

Pulling back just enough to look down at her, his nose wrinkled and he laughed, “Did you just
thank me?”

“I sure as fuck did,” she confidently answered before tugging his mouth to hers while kissing him
enthusiastically. Nibbling at his bottom lip, she took her time to enjoy the warmth of him over her
and she shook her head. “I ache, but I feel so good.”

“You’re welcome?” Negan’s right eyebrow arched up and he snickered against her lips. Motioning
her to wait, he got up from the bed and reached for the tissues that were on the dresser. When he
returned, he sat on the edge of the bed. Taking a look at her abdomen lowering and rising made
him smile. Reaching out, he traced his fingers over her ribs and it made her giggle when he did it.
“You wiggle too much.”

“Sorry, I’m ticklish,” she apologized and it made Negan smirk. Taking his time, he took a few
tissues and cleaned his release from her body. When he was tossing the tissues in the trash beside
the bed, she reached out to squeeze her fingers around his thigh. “You didn’t have to pull out, you
know.”

Telling him that made him smirk and his eyes looked her over while she was laid out in the center
of his bed. Tracing his fingers from her inner hip, up toward her abdomen and between her breasts
made a whimper escape her lips. Arching up toward him, she noticed him lowering down and he
peppered kisses over her chest.

“I know,” Negan bit down on his bottom lip when he lifted his gaze to her. Getting up, he carefully
lowered himself to lay over her in a way where his weight was balanced on his left arm so he
wouldn’t hurt her. Resting his head against her shoulder, he couldn’t help but smile when she
instinctively wrapped her arms around his shoulders. “It’s hard to read you.”

“What do you mean?” she stroked her fingers through his hair, nestling her head in next to his
while he laid over her. With anyone else, she was certain that she would have felt claustrophobic,
but with Negan she actually enjoyed this close contact with him.

“I mean, I want to be the man that wants to make love to you and be romantic with you,” Negan
began with a long, dramatic sigh. Pausing to take a minute, he faintly kissed over her collarbone
and traced his rough fingertips over her chest. “While I think you like that, I also think you would
rather me be dirty with you.”

“I’m okay with a bit of both,” she blurt out with a snicker before leaning in to press a kiss over the
top of his head. “Hey, you originally sold me on the whole dominant relationship with you here.
You can’t blame me for being the slightest bit interested.”

“And what do you prefer?” Negan lifted his head, his right eyebrow raising to try and read her
reaction to his question.

“It depends on the moment,” she palmed in over the side of his rough face, admiring him even
more when he leaned into her touch. “I think both were great and depending on what’s going on,
I’ll happily take either one.”

“So it’s all about reading a situation, huh?” Negan teased her with a smirk and lowered his head
back down to cuddle it in over her. “I guess you’re always going to keep me on my toes then. Has
this at all let you down in any way?”

“Sleeping with you?” she questioned and he nodded which made her laugh. “Negan, you have no
idea how much I’ve liked it. The first time I slept with someone I didn’t understand why people
liked it or wanted to do it. With you, I get it. Yeah, I ache, but it’s worth it. Plus…this…”

“What?” his voice vibrated against her skin while he kissed over her chest.

“Being in your arms. The way you look at me and touch me,” she brushed Negan’s hair back
behind his ear. Her heart was still hammering inside of her chest. Nothing had ever enamored her
like this had. She looked forward to every moment with Negan and she could never recall feeling
that way about anything in her life. “It’s the most incredible, addictive feeling I’ve ever had in my
life.”

Without a word, Negan lifted his head and stared out at her with surprise. The way his eyes
narrowed made her nervous, but unhurriedly a smile tugged at the corners of his lips. Stretching
out, his lips met hers in a delicate caress and her comment seemed to make him happy to hear.
Kissing him was remarkable and absolutely took her breath away.

“Well I’m glad you feel that way,” Negan hummed against her lips, nibbling gently at her bottom
lip, “because I feel the same way about you and I’m eager to do whatever I can to keep you in my
life.”

“As if you have to try,” she cupped his squared jaw in her palms and eyed him over. “You’re
perfection. I’m lucky that you even looked twice at me Negan. Someone would be crazy to let you
slip through their fingers. You’re everything someone could want and more.”

Negan cuddled his head in next to hers and she felt on top of the world being with him. Negan was
gorgeous. He was good with kids. He was fun. He was romantic. There were so many layers to him
and she was excited that he was allowing her to get to discover them. For the first time in her life,
with Negan she felt at ease at nights. Her fears no longer ruled her thoughts. Often, she would
worry about tomorrow and the future, but with Negan, all she cared about was what was happening
in the moment.

It was incredible how fast time flew with Negan. In the past, days were boring and long. There was
always a fear of her future but getting to spend her time with Negan was phenomenal. She looked
forward to it. Being with Negan changed her in a lot of good ways. Instead of being worried and
scared all the time she actually looked forward to her days. Yeah, the thought of that schoolboard
meeting that was scheduled was always on her mind, but that wasn’t the only thing for her
anymore.

Over the next couple of weeks, they spent every moment together when he wasn’t working. Even
when he was working, she found herself lounging around his home working on things for herself.
There was no need for her to really go home to her parents. Of course she would stop by here and
there to let her parents know that she wasn’t dead, but she had everything she needed at Negan’s
home.

Y/N and Negan really didn’t have a lot of sex because there was never enough time in the day to
get it all in. Actually, a lot of their time was spent with Sam. Multiple times Sam came over to hang
out with them and it was really nice getting to spend time with her when things weren’t so tense.
Together, she had a lot of fun with Sam. Negan’s niece was a good kid and reminded Y/N a lot of
herself when she was younger. She wished she would have had a family like Sam because then she
may have had a bit of happiness in her life. Sam was very loved and Y/N was very appreciative that
Sam was including her in this life.

On this specific day, Y/N woke up in Negan’s bed feeling joyful. The night before they had just
curled up and watched movies together before falling asleep. It was the simple things in life that
appealed to her, but these were moments that she would have never found herself doing before
dating Negan. Dating life scared the hell out of her in the past, but with Negan she found herself
getting very comfortable with it. Negan had to go to work today and she didn’t often get up when
he did. Instead, she would sleep in and get a little bit more rest. It was her phone vibrating on the
nightstand that had woken her. Reaching out, she grabbed a hold of it to see that Negan had texted
her to let her know that he left his wallet on the counter in the kitchen. Tonight, he was supposed to
go out with a friend from work which meant he was going to need it. So he asked her to bring it to
him while he was working.

Getting up was hard, but at the same time, she was excited at the idea of getting to see Negan at
work. When she got up, she took a quick shower and then went to grab his wallet. The movement
was quick and she ended up dropping it on the floor to have it flip open on the floor. Kneeling
down she reached for it to see the photo that it had opened to was Lucille and Negan together.
Stroking her thumb over the picture, she felt her throat go dry knowing that Negan’s late wife
wasn’t something she often thought about. Maybe it should have been though since she was still
his first picture in his wallet and he still wore his wedding ring, even this far into their relationship.
Flipping to the next set of pictures she could see that he had multiple photos of Sam in his wallet.
There was also a few random photos, but when she fell upon a photo of Negan with a very
obviously sick Lucille, she felt her heart ache.

At this point, she knew a lot about Negan’s relationship with Lucille and his past, but she still
didn’t know when Lucille died. How long ago had it been? Negan was very open about things
before Lucille got sick, but he wasn’t exceedingly open about after she was diagnosed. Looking at
the last photo in his wallet, she noticed that it was a photo of her with Negan and it made her smirk.
Clearly Negan had a photo from his phone printed out to put in there and it charmed her. They were
not even a month into their dating and she was already in his wallet?

Taking notice that something was sticking out, she reached for it to see that it was the photo strip
that they had done with Sam at the mall the other day. Sam was sitting between the two of them
and she found herself enchanted that Negan had kept it in his wallet. It was a fun day that they
shared and the silly expressions in the pictures they took made her smile. Instead of spying any
further on his personal items, she closed his wallet back up and headed to his work. The one thing
his wallet made her realize is that she had so many unanswered questions that were still there about
Lucille. Ones that she knew she would have to approach with caution, but her curiosity was getting
the best of her and she knew that.

When she got to Negan’s work, she parked in the lot that Negan directed her to do. He told her to
walk around the school to come and give him his wallet on the baseball diamond that they had.
Part of her was nervous about approaching him at the school. She remembered how strict her
school was about people visiting and it made her worry if she was going to get tackled just for
being here without announcing herself. It was hard not looking over her shoulder every second just
to make sure the security at the school didn’t go crazy on her just for being on the premises.

As she started approaching the baseball diamond, she saw that Negan was out in the middle of it
talking to a few of the students. The rest of them were spread out all around except for the few that
were surrounding him. When a few of the students noticed her approaching first, Negan looked
over his shoulder and smiled when he saw her stepping in beside the gate that was near the dugout.
Swallowing down hard, she knew this was the first time she had ever seen him working. He was
wearing a baseball cap, a white t-shirt and athletic pants that made her bite at her bottom lip. If
Negan would have been her gym teacher when she was in high school, she was certain that she
would have been in trouble because she would have wanted to be in his class twenty-four-seven.

After a second, Negan turned toward her and started running toward where she was standing. As he
approached, he slowed down and his smile expanded over his handsome features. It was one that
immediately drew her attention to his gorgeous dimples. That was always something that won her
over with Negan. All he had to do was smile and she had butterflies in her stomach.

“Hello gorgeous,” Negan approached her, outstretching his hands to settle them in over her sides.
Surprised with his forward movements, she was tense as he lowered down to her to brush his lips
over hers. Worried that he would get in trouble for kissing her, she had trouble kissing him back.
But he didn’t seem worried which soon relaxed her. Curling her fingers around the back of his
neck, she kissed him back and heard Negan growl when he pulled away. One of the students
whistled which made Negan throw his middle finger up when they did it. Immediately she felt a
laugh fall from her throat and a few of his students laughed. “I’m sorry you had to come here and
put up with these little shits.”

“I’m not, it was nice getting to see you in this get up. Why don’t you wear those pants more
often?” she whispered quiet enough so the kids in his class couldn’t hear them. When she said that,
Negan’s head lowered and a wicked grin spread out over his handsome features. “Those are…
nice.”

“You like them?” Negan sucked at his bottom lip and arched his right eyebrow in curiosity. “I’ll
have to wear them for you at home then.”

“Are you wearing anything underneath?” she stepped close enough to him making an amused
sound fall from Negan’s throat. Negan’s head did a cocky bob and he looked back over his
shoulder to make sure the students weren’t paying attention to them.

“You’re naughty, you know that?” Negan slurred when she reached for his wallet to pull it from
her bag. She lifted it enough for Negan to grab it and slide it into his pocket. “So…what are you
going to do tonight?”

“What? You need to know where I’m at all times?” she teased him, reaching up to circle her
fingers in over the center of his chest and Negan’s hazel eyes narrowed at her when she said it.
With a tilt of his head, he smirked.

“Trust me baby, I’d much rather be home with you,” Negan reached up to wrap his fingers around
her wrist. Something changed in Negan’s face and he lowered his stare from her. What was that? It
was like a switch and she didn’t know how to read that. “This is just something…something one of
my friends here wanted to do. I kind of couldn’t get out of it.”

“I understand,” she watched him take off his baseball cap to brush his fingers through his hair to
slick it back. Noticing that his attitude seemed to change a bit, she lifted her hand to swipe her
thumb in over the curve of his chiseled jaw. “I figured since I’ve kind of ditched my parents
completely since I started dating you, that I would have dinner with them tonight. I guess my mom
is making my favorite.”

“Aw, they missed you,” Negan winked at her, reaching out to loosely wrap his arms around her
waist again. When he leaned in to kiss her, she pulled away and let out a nervous sound. “What?”

“Your entire class is watching the two of us,” she alerted him, noticing over his shoulder that every
single one of his students was staring at the two of them together. When Negan looked over his
shoulder most of them immediately looked away.

“You nosey little shits,” Negan called out with a laugh and he threw his hand up in the air. “Run
the bases while I’m busy. Do something!”

“You can talk to them like that?” she was amused to see the students do what Negan told them.
When he turned back to her, his nose was wrinkled and he was laughing. “You would think you
would get in trouble talking to them like that.”

“Ah, no. We are chill. They know I’m a sarcastic shit and they give it back for the most part,”
Negan informed her with a shake of his head when he leaned back in to pepper kisses over her lips
making her laugh when he pulled her playfully in closer to his chest. “I hope you enjoy your time
tonight with your parents. Are you going to stay over there tonight or are you coming back to my
place after dinner?”

“Are you kidding me? Sleep in my cold lonely bed or sleep with your arms around me?” she acted
like it was a hard decision and Negan snorted when she was being dramatic.

“You’ve been with me every day since we started dating. I didn’t know if you would eventually
want alone time. I don’t have a problem with you in bed with me tonight though,” Negan insisted
with a loud sigh and he pressed a loving kiss over her cheek. “I’m glad it’s Friday so I can sleep in
tomorrow. It will be nice to have a break.”

“Getting to sleep in with you in the mornings is one of my favorite things,” she alerted him with a
hum and tipped up to kiss him again which led to a few of the students letting out teasing sounds.
“You better get back to work.”

“I’ll see you tonight,” Negan rolled his eyes at his students’ reaction to them kissing and stepped
back away from her. “Thank you for bringing this to me. I’d be lost without you.”

“You know it,” she winked and watched him run back to the students where one of them started
hackling Negan about his girlfriend. It made her laugh, but she knew she needed to leave before
someone picked up on her being there.

Stealing one final glance, she enjoyed the sights of him interacting with the students. Negan was
good with kids. Even if he was being a smartass with them.

Heading back to her car, she decided to go home to Negan’s. For a while she stayed at Negan’s
place, but knew when it started getting toward the time she was supposed to go back home with her
parents that she should head over to help her mother make the dinner.

When she showed up, her mother welcomed her with a big hug and it was nice to see that she was
missed at least. Y/N had always thought that she could just disappear and her parents would never
give a shit at the end of the day. Her mother alerted her to the fact that her father was working on
something, but would join them when dinner was ready.
Going straight to helping her mother with dinner, they were rather quiet. There wasn’t much to talk
about that she could freely do since she was dating Negan. So if her mother wanted to talk, Y/N
would let her, but she wasn’t going to freely open up about details going on in her personal life.

Dinner was surprisingly quiet because her father didn’t say much. They just talked about random
odds and ends. When they finished with dinner, her father said he would do the dishes since they
had cooked the dinner. As her father left the room, Y/N could see that her mother was staring out
at her. It was what she would consider a judgmental stare and it made Y/N look down to make sure
that she didn’t spill anything on her during the meal, “What is it?”

“So, who is the guy?” her mother finally questioned after leaving her hanging after a few minutes
of uncomfortable silence. Immediately, a warmth flushed into her cheeks and she looked away
from her mother. “You were always here. Then you got this job and I can only assume you’ve met
a boy. You actually look happy. It’s something I haven’t seen in a very long time. Usually you’re
really tense. Today, I think I’ve seen you smile more than I’ve seen you smile before.”

“Wow,” she hesitantly laughed hating that her mother was so observant and sadly knew that there
was a man in her life. Did she really give off that big of a vibe to other people? The old her would
have been mad at the idea that she looked happier because of a man, but it was true. It was all due
to Negan that she was like this and she knew it. “He’s a really good guy.”

“So it is a boyfriend?” her mother’s eyebrow arched and Y/N couldn’t help the smile that tugged at
her lips and she nodded. She knew deep down that she had to keep things somewhat a secret now
because of the fact that it was Negan that she was dating. “What’s he like?”

“I don’t know how to describe him,” she thought for a moment letting out a long sigh. “He’s the
sweetest, most caring man I’ve ever met. He’s funny, charming, handsome…all of the best details
you could put into a man. I’ve never…felt like this before and it’s because of him. I’ve never met
someone who has encouraged me to be the best version of myself while also being happy. He’s
perfect. Everything I could have dreamt of and more.”

“Wow, it sounds like you’re in love already,” her mother snickered, reaching out to place her hand
over Y/N’s and it made Y/N’s heart flutter inside of her chest. Pulling her hand back, she didn’t
know if it was too soon to be using a word like that. Love. That was a big word. “When will we get
to meet him?”

“I don’t know mom. It’s kind of fast,” she reasoned with her mother and she swallowed down hard.
“I’m still trying to determine if this a permanent thing. I mean, I consider him my boyfriend and I
love every moment I’ve spent with him.”

“It sounds like a dream come true to me,” her mother pointed out and it made Y/N laugh before
lowering her head. Negan was a dream come true. Fuck, being with him scared the shit out of her
because she couldn’t believe the ways that Negan made her feel.

“He is pretty dreamy. I hate to admit it mom, but this man has proven to me that everything I
thought about dating is bullshit. In the short time we’ve been together, I’m not sure anyone knows
me better than he does. He wants to know who I am. He wants to help me become a better version
of me. He pampers me, he takes cares of me, he is the sweetest man you would ever meet,” she
continued to swoon about Negan knowing that even tonight she was disappointed that she wasn’t
with him. “In his arms I feel safer than I have my entire life. I used to worry every day about my
future. With him in my life, I’m not so much worried about it anymore. He gives me confidence
that everything is going to be okay.”

“What does he look like?” her mother urged her further into details and it made Y/N
uncomfortable, but she knew that she could be vague.

“I’m going to be honest with you mom, he’s older than me,” she admitted knowing that Negan was
a bit older than her in general so she was sure that her mother would have been uncomfortable with
that if she stressed the age difference. “He’s just…perfect. He’s tall, slender, hazel eyes, dark hair,
gorgeous dimples…he has tattoos.”

“We might want to keep your dad from that information for a while,” her mother teased her with a
smirk looking toward the area of the kitchen. It made Y/N more at ease to know that her mother
wasn’t being so stressed about the idea of her having a boyfriend in her life. “I’m going to take it
the two of you are having sex?”

“Mom!” she blurt out feeling an overwhelming sense of dread when her mother said that out loud.
Lowering her head, she buried it in her palm and shook her head. “That is really not something I
want to be talking about with you.”

“So that’s a yes,” her mother reasoned making Y/N groan out with displeasure. In her opinion,
there was nothing worse than getting your parents involved in your sex life. That was the last
person she wanted to talk about sex with Negan to. “All that I ask for you is to be careful. I want
you to be happy, but I also want you to still have the future we always talked about. I don’t want
you stuck in a situation where you are unhappy, pregnant and have no means to helping yourself.”

There was an uncomfortable silence that filled the air after she said that and Y/N wondered if that
was how her mother felt being stuck with her father. There was that air of curiosity that got to her,
but also the fear of hearing the answer to that. Because then there was the idea that her mother
didn’t want to have her in the first place and getting pregnant with Y/N is what forced her mother
to stay with her father. That was something she had never heard from her mother before, so it
definitely shocked her.

“We’re careful,” she assured her mother and she shrugged her shoulders, letting out a long sigh. “If
it puts your mind at ease, we haven’t slept together more than a couple of times since we’ve been
together. I find that we spend more time hanging out together and enjoying each other’s time than
we do being sexual.”

“Does that mean he’s not good?” her mother definitely went too far with her question and it made
Y/N snort with disbelief. “I’m just saying, some men you love and you are willing to look over the
fact that they aren’t very good in bed.”

“No, he’s perfect in the bedroom. He’s just romantic, very romantic. He wants to make me feel
special and he wants our relationship to mean something,” she explained with a loud sigh knowing
that she would have loved to have had more sex with Negan in the time they had been together, but
Negan always wanted each moment to be good for her. “I know this is going to sound weird mom,
but he really just wants to focus on what makes me happy. He wants me to feel pampered and like
I’m the only woman in the world for him.”

“Then why the fuck are you so nervous about him?” her mother swatted the table after hearing that
and it made her laugh. She had never realized that there was this side to her mother and she liked it.
Why had she never seen it before? “I like hearing that you have a healthy relationship with
someone. That’s all you ever really want for your child. For them to do better than you. Find
someone that makes them happy and wants you to succeed in life.”

“I have confidence that he is just that,” she reached out to place her hand over her mother’s and she
squeezed over it firmly. Thinking about Negan made her realize that obviously her mother had met
him already and she was already swooning over Negan in the past. “Trust me, I guarantee you that
you would really like him. I know he’s the kind of guy that would just warm your heart.”

“So that’s what you’ve been wasting your time doing?” the sound of her father’s voice pulled her
attention from her mother and it made her jump. Shifting uncomfortably in her chair, Y/N lowered
her gaze and her father scoffed. “Here I was thinking that you were actually taking things seriously
after fucking yourself out of school.”

“I have my meeting with the schoolboard soon,” she informed her father with a shrug of her
shoulders and she let out a shuddering breath. “I’m prepared for what is coming. You don’t have to
worry about that.”

“I do actually. I thought I taught you better than this,” her father shamed her from where he was
standing, his arms folded out in front of his chest and he looked absolutely disgusted with her. “We
talked about the career. The career always came first because as soon as you focused on a
relationship you were going to forget all about your future. People get blinded by fucking love and
as soon as they are, they forget everything about their future and their potential. You already put
yourself one step in the grave because of what you did with your professor and now you just laid
yourself completely in after all of this.”

“I think you would be surprised,” she attempted to defend herself knowing that Negan had already
helped her a lot as it was and he wasn’t the kind of person that wanted to hold her back from her
dreams.

“What I’m surprised with is how disappointing you turned out to be,” her father snarled and she felt
her heart sink when her father said that to her. For most of her life she had looked up to her father
and he was the person that she had tried to get the acceptance from the longest. He was the one that
urged her into doing law because she wanted to be like him when she was little. So to hear him say
that broke her. “I thought I raised you right…”

“You did raise me right,” she stammered with a confused expression. “I’ve always done everything
right. I worked harder than anyone. I graduated at the top of my class in high school. I worked my
ass off on the first few years of college, but I stood up for myself with my professor. I did what I
had to in order to protect myself dad. He tried to assault me. Would you have rather me just lay
there and take what he did? I have put everything into all my classes. All my grades prove that.
What he was doing to me was wrong. Altering my grades so that way he could blackmail me into
having sex with him.”

“If I heard you correctly from in there, your boyfriend is apparently older than you?” her father
repeated her words and it made her eyebrows furrow with fear as to where her father was going
with this. “You have no problem dating an older man, but if an older man you’re not attracted to
wants to have sex with you, it automatically becomes assault? If the person you are dating now
was your professor, you would have fucked him, right?”

“That’s the nastiest thing I’ve ever heard you say,” she frowned not believing the things that came
out of her father’s mouth about what happened with her and the professor. “It had nothing to do
about attraction dad. It had everything to do with the fact that he was abusing his power over me to
make me do what he wanted. Even if he was the most attractive man I have ever seen, I would
have never allowed it. I would have still had the same reaction. It had nothing to do with
attraction.”

“Right,” her father rolled his eyes and she could tell that he didn’t believe her which hurt her all the
more.

“At this point I feel like you would have just rather me sleep with my professor instead of standing
up for myself,” she pointed out and her father shrugged making her let out a disgusted breath.

“You’re going around being a slut anyways now,” her father stated with a dark expression, his eyes
narrowing out at her. It made her stand up from the table, her heart was pounding inside of her
chest and she felt like every part of her was on fire. “You could have at least been a slut and
finished school instead of ruining your future and deciding to be a whore afterwards.”

“How am I a slut for dating someone?” she demanded an answer from her father, looking to her
mother who was looking down and away. It was obvious that she was embarrassed by her father’s
outburst, but her mother was saying nothing. That wasn’t rare. At this point her father could have
said anything and her mother wouldn’t defend her even though her mother had seemed okay with
everything before. “Wouldn’t I have to be sleeping around in general with everyone and anyone to
be a slut?”

“Whatever makes you feel better honey,” her father moved around the table to sit on the corner of
it, folding his arms out in front of his chest. “What you should have been doing is groveling. You
should have been making up the work you knew that you were going to miss for the rest of this
semester. Maybe you should have apologized to the professor. Begged him to forgive you. The
schoolboard is not going to accept you back and you are so arrogant to think otherwise. You should
have done everything in your power to get back into that school or find something else. Instead,
you’re opening your legs to an older man. Sounds like you’ve taken this time to be exactly what I
called you.”

“I should have known it would be a mistake coming here tonight,” she went to leave feeling her
father grabbing a tight hold of her wrist as she went to leave. The yank he did jerked her back and
his fingers had an exceedingly hard squeeze over it. “Let go. You’re hurting me.”

“You are an ungrateful little shit and I taught you better than this,” her father scowled, his eyes
darkening while he looked her over. “After everything I have done for you over the years, this is
the way you decide to pay me back, huh? All that money wasted.”

“I’m sorry I’m not your perfect image dad,” she snapped back, attempting to pull her wrist back,
but he kept his firm grasp on it. “I guess I should have just let my professor rape me so you could
be proud of your little girl and the woman she became.”

“You know, you have a really smart mouth and no man is going to be accepting of that little girl,”
her father pulled her forward and she felt a nervous breath catch in her throat.

“Just because you’re an abusive shit that doesn’t like a strong woman doesn’t mean that the rest of
the world is like you,” she scoffed watching her father’s eyes narrow and a moment later felt the
firm smack of his hand across the side of her face. When he did it, her mother finally stood up from
where she was seated and stepped forward. Reaching up with her free hand, Y/N felt her chest
aching and she finally found the strength to pull her wrist from her father’s grasp. “Wow, not only
am I not the person that you thought I was, but you certainly aren’t the man that I thought you
were.”

“Y/N,” her mother tried to step forward and Y/N held her hand up to stop her mother from talking
to her. “This just got elevated very quickly and I think if you sat down…”

“I’m not going to sit down here with him right now. I’m going out for a while and I’m going to let
him cool down because I’m not going to sit here after he just hit me,” she insisted with a firm
shake of her head, backstepping away from the table. “He’s not the man that I thought he was…”

“I’m not going to change my mind on how I feel you ungrateful little shit,” her father got up from
the table and her mother stood before her father to press her hands into the center of his chest to
stop him from moving forward toward Y/N.

“Then I guess I’ll be back later to get my things,” she swallowed down hard, hating to have to say
that, but the things that her father said were just so unforgivable that she couldn’t stand to hear any
more of it.

Instead of waiting for any other response from her father, she headed for the door and left. There
was a sense of surprise that her mother didn’t come after her, but she didn’t know what she
expected from her in the first place. While her mother had stepped up when she felt her father was
getting too aggressive, she just let her father say those horrible things to Y/N. It was obvious that at
this point in her life, her parents no longer accepted her or wanted to support her with her future, so
Y/N was done with things. There was no point in trying with them anymore after her father’s
outburst and she absolutely hated it.

Walking across the street to Negan’s home, she didn’t even care if they saw her heading that way.
Their opinion of her was already skewed anyways so if they already thought she was a slut and a
horrible person, who cared what they honestly thought about her being with Negan?
 Chapter 11
Chapter Summary

After her father filled Y/N's mind with negative and nasty thoughts, Y/N starts to
judge her relationship with Negan in a harsh manner, but Negan is willing to do
whatever it takes to prove to her that his feelings are genuine.

Chapter Notes

This chapter does have a sense of coercion to it that may make people uncomfortable. I
want to put that out there just so it's known. I am finishing this at 6 in the morning.
Any errors in this I apologize for. I'll try to reread this later and see if I can edit the
things I missed. If you like this story, PLEASE COMMENT! Even if just, hey this
good. I see this story gets quite a bit of hits, but not a lot of comments. If people
comment, it helps us writers to continue to write for you. That's the stuff that fuels us.
So even if you don't like it, tell us. Seriously. Thank you for reading, but please
consider letting me know how you feel!

Once inside Negan’s house, Y/N closed the door behind her. Her body fell back against the door
and she let out a loud exhale. With her heart pounding inside her chest, she knew that she felt like
she was going to explode. Every part of her felt like it was on fire. A multitude of emotions were
flooding through her. Embarrassment. Anger. Sadness. Hatred. Badly she wanted to erupt so much
more than she had at her father, but she knew better. It wasn’t worth the pain and agony that would
just continue to grow inside of her.

If anyone else would have hit her or called her those things, she would have unquestionably stood
up for herself more than she did. It was just complicated when it was one of the people that were
supposed to love you saying those things. Your parents are just naturally supposed to love you and
support you. So to hear those things really broke her deep down.

There was never really a doubt in her mind that her father would be upset with her after finding out
she was dating someone. It was her father that always dug that idea deep down inside of her that
school and her career needed to come first. If she wasted her time on love and romance, it would
only hurt her in the long run. After all those things she listened to growing up from him she just
pictured that he would lecture her. It would be over and done with when he heard her out. Instead
he was furious with her. Never had he actually full on hit her like that. Yeah, he was rough on her
in a mental way growing up. It’s what probably kept her strong, but this was extreme.

The thing that actually hurt the most was hearing that he thought she should have sucked up to the
professor that sexually assaulted her. With her father telling her that he thought she should have
just taken it from her professor, it really troubled her. It disappointed her that her father thought she
was a slut. In her life she never fell into sex or relationships. So to hear that he thought that about
her and thought she should have taken her professor’s abuse truly hurt her.
She always liked to pride herself on the fact that she was strong. That she was hard to break. Right
now, she kept trying to count. Focus. But it wasn’t work. Her emotions were getting the best of her
and they were flooding up fast. When her tears started to burn at her eyes, she wished that Negan
was home. That he was there to talk to, but it was obvious that he was still gone by the way the
house was still dark. The strong, hardheaded woman she knew herself to be and she was crumbling.
If Negan was around, he was always her crutch. Whenever she felt like she was going to fall, he
was there to keep her up. Without him, everything was swallowing her whole leading her down the
path of misery.

When the air around her became almost suffocating, she gasped out. Panic. It was there. She
needed air. It had been a while since she had one of her panic attacks. She knew the signs. They
were all there. When things got to be too much and she didn’t know how to control the moment,
her body would immediately revert to this. She hated it. Heading back to the front door, she moved
onto the porch. Sneaking off toward the corner where she wouldn’t be visible to her parents, she
dropped down and did her best to calm herself. Crying made her weak and she didn’t want to cry.
She didn’t want her father to win in this and break her down. It was the last thing she wanted and it
killed her that she was letting someone affect her this much.

After a while, she managed to calm herself enough, but there were definitely tears. When the sound
of Negan’s Mustang filled the air, she knew that she had to get it together enough to be able to talk
to him. With their relationship still in the beginning, she didn’t want him to think she was crazy
when she explained to him why she was so upset.

Within the small amount of time she expected to face Negan, she was trying to come up with
something to say. Strange thing was, he wasn’t showing up as fast as she thought he would. The
amount of time it took for him to get to the porch seemed very long in general.

When she saw him finally reach the step to the porch, she could tell that he was walking
awkwardly and as he stepped up, he managed to miss the porch completely. Falling forward, he
was able to catch himself with his hands. An angered grunt fell from his throat and he lowered
down on the porch letting out a frustrated huff.

“Goddamn fucking porch,” Negan scoffed and she stayed quiet from where she was sitting on the
porch. Instead of helping him like she should have, she couldn’t help but stare. He tried to push
himself up, but he couldn’t muster the strength. Negan looked down at the step he had tripped on
and a growl fell from his throat. “Fuck you, you stupid fucking step. You’re an asshole.”

Negan’s head lifted and he looked at the door before dropping his head back down again, “Come
on Negan. You made it all the way home. You can fucking…you can get to the damn door. It’s
right there you stupid fucker.”

“Are you wasted?” she finally spoke up and it made Negan jump. When he saw that she was there,
he had managed to roll on his back and place his hand over the center of his chest. “You’re totally
drunk and you just drove home?”

“I’m not drunk,” Negan slurred, holding his hand up in the air. Waving his finger around, it seemed
like it was some kind of attempt to show that he was fine. “I’m just super exhausted. I didn’t drink
coffee today and it…”

There was a silence between them when Negan’s words lingered off and it was like he was trying
to focus on his finger that was before him, “Okay. I might be fucking drunk.”

“No shit,” she snorted and Negan’s smile expanded over his lips. Never had she seen Negan drunk
before and this was a new experience for her. Without reason Negan started to snicker for a few
seconds. After, his smile quickly turned to a frown and he lowered his arms at his sides. “I can’t
believe you drove home. Not only did you put your life at risk, but you also put the lives of others
at risk too Negan.”

“I didn’t kill anyone. I promise,” Negan’s head turned toward her and he was pouting while he
looked her over. The expression over Negan’s face made him look like a lost puppy dog that was
just looking for someone to take care of him. It was bizarre to see him like this. “I don’t…I don’t
really get drunk often. I’m sorry.”

Not sure of what to say, she watched Negan smile brightly and let out a long sigh, “You look cute
when you’re angry at me.”

“I’m not angry at you. I just can’t believe you did something so stupid,” she carefully pulled herself
up from the ground and moved over to try to help Negan up. “I don’t know what I would have
done if you got hurt.”

“Aw, you like me,” Negan pointed out while she helped pull him into a sitting position and when
she did, she moved in beside him to sit. Almost immediately he rest his head on her shoulder and
let out a long sigh. “I’m sorry.”

“What happened?” she reached out to brush her fingers in over the side of his face. Negan’s eyes
lifted and she could see that he was distressed but attempting to hide it in his drunken state.

“Were you crying?” Negan ignored her question, managing to lift his head enough to stare out at
her with big, curious eyes. Damn, she didn’t want him to notice, but he still did. Even wasted as
hell, he was extremely perceptive. “What’s wrong? What happened?”

“It’s a long story,” she admitted with her eyes closing when Negan stroked over the side of her
face. When he ran his fingers over a certain part of her face, she winced knowing that things were
still tender from where he father hit her. With a concerned expression, Negan tried to inspect her
face and she shook her head. “Don’t worry about it Negan.”

“What happened?” Negan demanded an answer, but she wasn’t about to tell him when he was
drunk like this. Especially since she knew that people who were drunk weren’t going to be thinking
clearly. Negan probably thought he could take on the world intoxicated. She realized that by the
way he drove home without worrying about his state. “Talk to me.”

“Only if we can get your ass in the house so I can get you some coffee, water and something to
snack on so we can sober you up,” she replied with a sigh and Negan grunted when she stood up
from the porch. With her help, Negan was able to get to his feet and follow her into the home. It
took longer than it should, but by the time she got him to the couch she knew that she had to get
over her own pain long enough to sober Negan up. “Stay here.”

“I can help you,” Negan garbled attempting to pull himself up from the couch when she headed for
the kitchen only for her to hear a loud crashing sound. Moving back into the living room, she
watched Negan pulling himself back onto the couch. It was a very theatrical movement as he
dragged himself from the floor to the couch. When he noticed that she was staring out at him, he
offered a goofy smile and let out a tense breath. “My bad.”

“How did you end up making it home and I didn’t find you in a body bag at the hospital?” she saw
that he had flipped over the coffee table in attempts to get up to follow her to the kitchen. Moving
over to help him up into a seated position blew her mind that Negan had gotten to this. She never
really thought he was this much of a drunk. Hell, he barely drank when they were together, so this
was a new side to him. Fixing the coffee table, she made sure that he was okay before heading
back to the kitchen to get some coffee started. It was good for her because it allowed her to gather
her thoughts on what she was going to tell Negan. When she moved back into the living room,
Negan was hunched over pinching the bridge of his nose. “Do you want to tell me what
happened?”

“Today isn’t the best of days for me,” Negan answered her without really elaborating. When she
set the coffee down before him, he lifted his head and gave her a weak smile. “Thank you.”

“I’ll be right back. I need to grab you some water and some chips or something,” she nodded
toward the coffee with a firm shake of her head. “Drink some of that please.”

“Yes dear,” Negan gave her one nod, reaching out to grab the mug. At least he was listening to her
and not fighting her. He was a reasonable drunk and not one that would fight with her. That was a
positive thing. Some people got rotten when they were drunk. Negan seemed still like Negan. Just
goofy and really klutzy.

When she returned back with the things she wanted to get in his system, she sat at the other end of
the couch and watched him. Instead of getting straight into things, she let him gather himself so
they could have an actual conversation, “How much did you have to drink tonight?”

“I don’t know,” Negan answered her truthfully, his thick eyebrows bouncing when he turned his
attention to her. “I had tequila and that doesn’t always agree with me. I’m more of a whiskey man.
So I’m kind of…”

Negan made another overdramatic sound and waved his fingers in the air to show that he wasn’t all
that well right now, “So what the hell happened? I thought you were just going to your parent’s
home and having dinner?”

“I did,” she frowned hating that she would have to go through everything again. Most of her life
she spent keeping things personal to her. There was a choice that she could make. She could lie and
tell Negan that everything was okay or she could be honest with him. They hadn’t really had a
moment in their relationship yet where they had gotten emotional with each other about things that
upset them. They were open about some things, but there was still a range of things that they
hadn’t touched yet. “Everything was going fine. I helped my mother with dinner, we ate and then
we were having a discussion.”

“Okay?” Negan bobbed his head, waiting for her to continue. There was tension and Negan picked
up on it. Setting the coffee down, he slid in closer to her and noticed that she was nervous
continuing with him. Grabbing an affectionate hold of her hands, he stroked his thumbs over the
back of them. “Baby, you can talk to me.”

“I know, I just…” she looked away from Negan only to have him reach one of his hands up to
stroke his fingers down the side of her face, over her jawline and under her chin to get her to look
up at him. “I’m not used to telling people things. My mother never liked me to show that things
were wrong. If we showed that we weren’t perfect, then…”

“Hey,” Negan hushed her, reaching up to cup her face in his hands with a tender embrace. “Let me
tell you something. I know your parents tried to convince you that you weren’t allowed to be
anything other than perfect. They built these unrealistic ideologies inside of you. No one is perfect,
but our imperfections…in the strangest of ways, those are the things that make us perfect to others.
You don’t have to hide from me. I see you. All of you. I accept you. I want you. I will be here for
you, no matter what. Nothing you could say could have me looking at you any different. Ever. I
want the two of us to be open. I want you to feel like you could come to me about anything. You
never have to hide any of you from me because nothing will pull me away from you.”
“Jesus Christ,” she felt tears burning at her eyes and she forced herself to look away from Negan.
Swiping his fingers over the side of her face to collect her tears, Negan frowned. Lowering his stare
he tried to get her to look at him again. “How are you this fucking perfect even when you’re totally
wasted?”

“I don’t have to be sober to know how I feel about you,” Negan assured her with frown, leaning in
closer to her. With the tip of his nose nudging hers and the warmth of his breath over her lips, it
made her take in a sharp breath. It was like this every time with him. Closing her eyes, she
shuddered beside him. Noticing her reaction, Negan brushed faint kisses from the side of her face,
to her forehead and then placing the last delicate kiss over her lips. “Talk to me sweetheart.”

“Okay,” her throat was dry, but with Negan’s forehead pressed up against hers she felt like the
strength was there to be able to talk about everything. It was odd how Negan could make her at
ease. “Dinner was fine and my father went to do the dishes. Apparently by the way that I was
acting, my mother could tell that I had a boy in my life.”

“A boy,” Negan repeated her words and it made her smirk knowing that he was amused with being
called a boy instead of a man.

“Yeah. A boy,” she thought back to what her mom said. Placing her hand over Negan’s from where
it was touching her face, she appreciated the kind touch after what her father had done. “She was
asking me about who I was with and I was honest with her. I was vague, but I told her I was dating
someone older. That he was the most amazing man I had ever met. Perfect in every way…”

“You are so sweet,” a slight smile tugged at Negan’s lips and he nuzzled his nose against hers, still
keeping that close contact between the two of them.

“She asked about sex,” she was truthful with Negan and saw him pull his head back enough to give
her a peculiar glance. “Don’t ask me, she was in an odd mood. It was a side to my mother I’ve
never seen. She seemed happy for me. She wanted to know personal details and unfortunately, I
gave some of them to her.”

“You told your mother about us having sex?” Negan inquired, his nose wrinkling when he thought
about the question.

“Not exactly. I just said that we had been together, but not a lot. That we were careful so she would
get off the subject,” she gave him further details about the discussion she had with her mother. It
was uncomfortable then, so it was even more uneasy talking about it now. “My mother seemed
pleased for me, but unfortunately my father heard it from the kitchen and he erupted on me.”

“Because it was me?” Negan’s eyebrow arched in curiosity and he seemed stiff.

“No, I didn’t say it was you. I didn’t name you. I mean I described you to my mother, but I didn’t
straight out say it was Negan Smith from the across the street,” she explained in further detail and
let out a long sigh when she thought about everything. “My father lectured me about how he taught
me better than to focus on relationships. That my career and my schooling was supposed to come
first. The worst part of it is that he told me that I was a slut and whore that clearly if my professor
would have looked like you, I would have fucked him. According to him, I should have been a
good girl and let my professor do what he was doing to me just to finish school. He’s ashamed of
me because I put one foot in the grave with my situation with my professor and then I full buried
myself by being in a relationship with you. I guess he would have been proud of me if I just let my
professor rape me and finished school like a good girl.”

“Sweetheart,” Negan let out a shuddering breath when she started to cry again and he shook his
head. “You did everything right and you are not a slut. Your father is just an old-fashioned piece of
shit that doesn’t like that you are living your own life. He likes controlling you…”

“My mother just sat there and let him say these things. Instead of defending me or speaking up, she
just lowered her head and let him say everything,” she let out an anxious laugh thinking back on
everything. “The only time she made a single move was after he hit me.”

“He…he what?” Negan’s eyes narrowed when she lifted her gaze to him and she could see that
something changed inside of him. It was like a switch went off inside of his head as soon as she
had mentioned that her father had hit her. “What do you mean he hit you?”

“Before he hit me, he was saying that I was too mouthy for a man to like,” she whimpered and she
saw the lines in Negan’s forehead getting deeper as his eyebrows furrowed. “I made a snappy
remark back about him being abusive and he smacked me.”

“This is what that’s from?” Negan dragged his thumb over her cheek to see the tiny mark that was
left on her face. “He had to smack you really hard for him to leave a mark like this Y/N.”

“It may have been from his wedding ring,” she tried to find an answer as to why there was still a
mark on her face. There was a silence between the two of them and it made her uncomfortable.
Unhurriedly, Negan deposited a long, lingering kiss against her forehead. After, he reached for his
coffee to finish off the rest of it. When he slammed the mug back onto the coffee table and stood
up, she let out an anxious breath. “What are you doing?”

“I’m going to go have a discussion with your father,” Negan insisted with a grunt, moving for the
door and she swiftly stood up from the couch to try to follow him. “You don’t hit your kids. You
don’t hit women…”

“Hey…” she pushed her hands into the center of his chest when she managed to slide between him
and the door before he could leave. “Listen to me. Okay? You can’t go over there like this. You’re
drunk and you’re not thinking clearly.”

“Trust me, sober me would definitely want to go over there and have a word with your dad too,”
Negan fumbled with her hands attempting to get her to carefully move aside so he could get
through the door. “Move aside Y/N. You can’t let him think that what he did was right. It was
wrong and he needs to…”

“It’s not worth it,” she tried to grab his face to get Negan to look at her, but he was focused on the
idea of giving her father a piece of his mind. “Look at me Negan. It won’t change his mind on how
he feels. It won’t make things better. My father is an asshole and he would just call the police or
something to hurt me because I care so much about you.”

“You can’t just let things like that go,” Negan reached for her shoulders to hold her in place, his
eyes locking with hers. “The things he called you…the things he said…they are wrong. But putting
his hands on you, that’s the biggest mistake he could have made.”

“I told them I was done. I’m not going back there. I’m going to get my things later and I’ll move
into the room you have for me here,” she hushed him seeing that his chest was rising and falling
repeatedly. He was worked up and there was no denying that. There was a vein at the side of his
head that was protruding and his face was somewhat red. “He’s not worth it.”

“No one hurts you and gets away with it,” Negan scoffed, carefully moving her aside with his
strength. Getting the door opened, Negan stepped outside and as he reached the porch, he felt her
fingers wrapping around his wrist. Looking over his shoulder, he could see that her eyes were full
of tears and he let out a pained sound at the sight.

“If you care about me, you won’t go over there,” she begged and Negan let out an overwhelmed
sound. He looked between her house and her before grunting loudly. Turning toward her, Negan
immediately wrapped his arms around her and pulled her in closer to his chest. “Maybe I am those
things Negan. What if I did fuck up my life completely?”

“Baby no,” Negan hushed her, cupping her face in his hands to get her to look up at him. “No
woman has to go through what you went through with your professor. No one should just take
that.”

“But what if my professor got the idea that I would do something like that by my actions
somehow?” she reasoned out loud and Negan immediately shook his head, hating to hear her say
something like that. “Maybe it was a look I gave him. What if…”

“No. Absolutely fucking not!” Negan asserted, urging his fingers underneath her jaw to get her to
look at him again when she started going off on her thoughts and fears. “Unless you were telling
him to his face that you were interested in him, nothing you did told him it was okay to do that with
you. Not a smile. Not words that he could take in a flirtatious way. Not even you wearing
something that would draw his attention to you. Nothing you did said to him that it was okay for
him to do that to you. Your father telling you that you should have just let it happen shows what a
piece of shit he is.”

When she seemed to fall apart harder before him, Negan pulled her closer to him and tried his best
to calm her, “I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to make you cry…”

“It wasn’t you,” she shook her head. The pressure in her head was awful and she could feel her
chest aching with just how hard she had been sobbing in front of Negan. A gasp fell from her throat
when she felt Negan pick her up in his arms and she hooked her arms tightly around his neck. “You
shouldn’t be doing this.”

“I won’t drop you,” Negan promised when he kicked the front door shut behind him with his foot
when they reentered his home. Taking his time and not rushing things, Negan moved to his
bedroom and laid her down in over the center of his bed. Crawling in with her, he wrapped his
arms around her and spent time peppering kisses over her face. “Please don’t let your father make
you think what you did was wrong. You were right in every way.”

“It just hurts. He was the person I wanted to get approval from for so long, you know? I think in
the back of my mind I did this all for him. Worked as hard as I did because I wanted him to be
proud of me. I wanted to be viewed as special in his eyes,” she declared with a whimper and Negan
frowned hearing that. “So to hear that I’m a complete disappointment and let down because
someone tried to hurt me and I just didn’t accept it…it hurt.”

“It just shows his ignorance Y/N,” Negan insisted, stroking his fingers through her hair and he bit
down on his bottom lip. “I don’t think you did everything for him. I think you did all the hard work
you did because you were proud of yourself. You knew you were good enough and you wanted to
have the best potential future for yourself.”

“He wasn’t wrong though. I originally was focusing completely on my school and my career.
Before you, I would have been focused on that meeting I had coming up, but instead I’m spending
my time with you. Maybe being a slut is what…” she started going off again and Negan’s mouth
claimed hers to interrupt her.

“You aren’t being a slut for being with someone who makes you happy. Someone who wants you
to have a future and achieve greatness,” Negan silenced her, his hazel eyes hooked on hers.
“Someone who cares about you so very much.”

“I still wonder if I forced you into this. I wanted you so bad and…” she felt him nudging her onto
her back so he could crawl in over her. “I wouldn’t take no for an answer so I feel like you had to
come up with this dating thing so you would be comfortable with what I wanted. I’m in the
position of my professor…”

“Honey, no,” Negan stroked the side of her face, an amused expression pressed in over his
features. “I’m the one that approached you first. Remember? I’m the one that wanted you and got
you to agree to this. But I tell you what. It is the best decision I have made in such a very long time.
Every moment I get to spend with you is amazing. I can’t wait for the moments where we are alone
together. I love that every night the last thing I do is see your face and every morning it’s the first
thing I see. I’ve not been this happy in a very long time. You are the best thing I could have asked
for.”

“You’re just saying that because you want to make me feel better,” she frowned and Negan shook
his head after rolling his eyes in a dramatic manner. “Negan…I’m a mess.”

“No, you are everything I want and more,” Negan whispered and her eyes locked with his. Hearing
him say that awoke something inside of her and her fingers curled around the back of his neck to
pull his mouth to hers. Passionately kissing him over and over again, her fingers sank into the thick
tresses of his hair and heard him grunt into her mouth. When she reached for the bottom of his
shirt, Negan grabbed for her wrist to stop her. “You’re sad. I would be taking advantage of the
situation.”

“I can’t think of a better way to make myself feel better than being with the man that makes me
feel like the only woman in the world,” she stated with a loud gulp, palming her hands up and over
his chest from underneath his shirt. Getting to his knees, Negan lifted his arms and allowed her to
pull his shirt from his body. When she got the material on the floor, her lips found their way to his
chest. With wet kisses, she could hear Negan’s breathing getting heavier. “Please help take the
pain away…”

“Okay,” Negan agreed, his Adam’s apple bouncing in this throat when he stood up from the bed.
Kicking out of his shoes, Negan watched her pulling at her clothes in a nervous manner while he
moved to the side of the bed. Reaching for the top drawer of the nightstand, he pulled out a
condom and looked over his shoulder at her. “Get in the center of the bed.”

Obeying, she did what he wanted watching him set the condom on the side of the bed. Negan’s
fingers hooked into the waistband of his pants to push them down his hips. Swallowing down hard,
Negan got onto the bed and looked her over.

“I wish you realized how perfect you actually are,” Negan stretched out his long torso and lowered
down. Taking his time, he pressed faint kisses over her flesh starting at her ankle. As his kisses
rose, it drew her hips to raise up from the bed and he let out a shuddering breath when he looked up
at her. His long eyelashes fluttered and his kisses focused over her navel. “I couldn’t imagine
someone spending time with you and not thinking you were fucking perfection.”

“Negan,” she let out a quivering breath while Negan laid in over her. Caressing her palms up and
over his chest, she could see his heavy-lidded stare. Licking over her lips, she watched Negan
reach for the condom he put on the bed and she felt her heart hammering inside of her chest.

“Do you want to put it on me or do you want me to put it on?” Negan held the condom out and she
felt her throat go dry while thinking about it. Reaching for the condom, she tore it open. Pulling out
the condom, she set the wrapper aside and watched Negan balance himself on his palms. “We
don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.”

“No, I do,” she assured him when she reached down between them. Grabbing a hold of Negan’s
thick erection, she led the condom over the tip. Negan’s lust filled eyes stayed hooked on her while
she rolled it down his rigid body. When she had it on him right, she lifted her gaze to stare into his
eyes. “You are perfect. You know that?”

“Mmm…I’m not, but you are,” Negan adjusted over her, bracing his weight just right so that way
he could press down in over her and balance his weight on his arms. When his mouth met hers, she
was desperate to kiss him. As her tongue brushed against his, it reminded her all over again just
how drunk he was when he came home tonight. Alcohol still lingered on his tongue and she could
taste it. Even in his eyes she could still see that while he had sobered up, he was still intoxicated.
“What is it?”

“Is it wrong to make you do this when you are drunk?” she pondered and Negan snorted, shaking
his head when he lowered his head to deposit sloppy kisses over the side of her neck that made her
take in a sharp breath. “We should wait until you are sober.”

“I’m sober enough to make love to you,” Negan hushed her with his kisses, easing her into them
and when he reached between the two of them, she let out a nervous sound when he lined his body
up with hers. “What’s wrong?”

“We just haven’t done this much, so each time is new for me,” she explained with a small nod
alerting him that it was okay. With a smirk, Negan pushed his hips forward easing his length into
her making her head drop back into the pillows. Wrapping her arms around him, she kissed at the
side of his neck and was desperate to have him close. “You mean the world to me Negan.”

Pulling his head back, Negan’s eyes locked with hers while he took his time rolling his hips over
her. The thrusts were focused, slow and even though the first time he said he made love to her, this
felt so much more like what she would picture them making love would be like. Each touch, each
caress and every movement felt purposeful. Negan was doing what she asked him to do in making
her feel better and by making love to her that was exactly what he was doing.

“You are my world,” Negan slurred against her lips, kissing her again and again. Digging her
fingertips into the flexing muscles in his back, she knew just how much Negan truly meant to her.
She would give up her parents just to be with Negan. With Negan, everything in the world felt right
and she never wanted to leave that feeling.

When they finished, Negan laid over her whispering sweet nothings in her ear that made her heart
flood with happiness. It was like everything her father said could be erased with the words that
Negan was feeding her. Badly, she wanted to believe everything Negan said about her instead of
the things that her father did.

While she loved being wrapped up in Negan’s arms, it was harder for her to fall asleep tonight
considering that everything that was flooding through her mind. Negan had fallen asleep long
before she did and his soft breaths were like music to her ears. Negan was the one thing that could
calm her in this world and she knew she was counting on him too much to make her feel better.
Yet, it didn’t seem to bother him.

Looking down, she laced her fingers with Negan’s and let out a tight breath when her fingertips slid
in over the wedding ring that was still there on his hand. How long would Negan keep this on?
While she thought they were having such an incredible relationship between the two of them, it
was clear that Negan was still very much caught up in his late wife.
Turning in his arms there was enough light filtering into the room that showed his masculine
features. Drawing her thumb over his jawline, she watched him swallow down hard before leaning
into her touch. He was still very much asleep, but the touch alone drew him to her. It was strange
how much she was falling for Negan. More than anything, she wanted him to feel the same way
for her that she did him. For the most part, she thought that he did, but seeing his wallet earlier and
knowing that he still wore his wedding ring made her question otherwise. It could have been her
father in the back of her head with the things he said stirring these thoughts up for her.

No one made her feel like Negan did. She was enamored with him in every way possible. She
didn’t think it was possible to be as perfect as he actually was. Palming over the side of his face,
she breathed out loudly and watched his eyes squeeze shut. The sound of his breathing told her he
was still sleeping, but the sharp sounds told her he was having a nightmare. Sliding in closer to
him, her touch rose to palm in over the side of his face attempting to calm him.

“It’s okay,” she whispered brushing her fingers into his hair, attempting to soothe him while he
slept. Whatever the dream was, she could tell that he was upset. The way his body shook and his
facial expressions worried her. “I promise, I won’t let anything happen to you. You’re safe with
me.”

A wince filled the air and she lifted up enough to press a kiss over Negan’s forehead, down the
bridge of his nose and them her lips hovered over his. Kissing him in a subtle manner, she could
hear his breathing change. Dragging her thumb over his bottom lip, she sighed and closed her eyes
tightly.

“Negan,” she whispered his name, attempting to pull him from his sleep. When he didn’t wake up,
she flattened her palm in over the side of his face. After a soft nudge, Negan’s eyes partially
opened and he let out a groan. “There is something I have to tell you. It’s…it’s important.”

“What is it?” Negan’s eyes closed again. His loud breaths alerted her to the fact that he was still
exceedingly fatigued. Teasing her fingers through his short beard, she heard the hum of approval
while she touched him.

“I uh…” she felt her throat go dry while she stared out at him. This was a terrifying experience for
her. It was something that had been lingering in her mind for days, but she never had the gusto just
to say it. But after everything he said tonight, it just felt like the right time to express it. To finally
mutter the words she never in her life thought she would feel. “I love you.”

When she uttered those words, her heart hammered inside of her chest and she couldn’t believe that
she actually said it. It was something that she thought she’d never feel, yet here she was.
Truthfully? She meant it. Maybe it was too fast. But it was how she felt. She was in love with
Negan. Everything surrounded Negan. All of her thoughts went back to Negan. Nothing excited her
more than getting to spend time with Negan. If she didn’t say the words now, she was certain that
she never would say them.

“I know,” Negan’s arm curled around her waist and pulled her in closer to him, a tired sound falling
from his throat. When Negan’s nose nuzzled against the side of her neck, she didn’t know how to
respond. “I love you too Lucille.”

Immediately upon hearing those words, she felt a chill run down her spine as Negan’s heavy
breaths filled the air alerting her to the fact that he had fallen asleep again. Immediately, she
regretted saying what she did. Attempting to pull herself away, she felt like her skin was crawling
hearing him call her his wife’s name. Negan was out cold, but she still somehow managed to pull
herself from his arms and she hit the floor when she did. Staring up at him from the floor, she felt
crushed. Pulling her knees close to her chest, she lowered her head and felt the world spinning
around her. Was this whole thing a mistake?

Getting up from the floor, she reached for Negan’s shirt and pulled it on over her body. Swiftly she
pulled her panties up her body and moved out of the bedroom. Pacing the hallway, she didn’t know
how to respond to what just happened. Yes, Negan was smashed so she didn’t know if she should
be as mad at him as she was. She knew better than to take advantage of Negan when he could
barely stand on his feet when he got in the house today.

Heading into the living room, she moved over toward the couch and sat down on it. Looking
around the room, she felt a state of panic flooding her veins. God, she had just admitted to Negan
that she had loved him. Something she knew was wrong and something that had been dug into her
head over and over again would ruin her life. She made the mistake of falling in love with someone
who would never truly love her. She was wasting her time.

Looking to the coffee table, she noticed that one of the photo albums Negan had usually tucked
away in one of his bookshelves was out. That meant that Negan had to be looking at it earlier when
she was asleep before he went to work. Reaching for it, she flipped it open and saw that there was a
photo that was resting on top. Picking it up, she looked it over to see that it was obviously Negan
and Lucille’s wedding photo from when they were young. Scanning over the photo, she took in the
image of the two of them and bit down at her bottom lip. Reaching for the light, she turned it on
and sighed loudly. Looking at the corner of the picture she could see a date on it and pulled it up
closer to look at it.

“Son of a bitch,” she dropped the photo back onto the coffee table when she realized that the day
that had just passed was obviously their anniversary together.

That explained everything. Why his friend took him out to the bar. Why Negan was completely
wasted. Everything was starting to make sense and fall into place. Burying her fingers into her hair,
she tugged at it and didn’t know how to react. Leaving wasn’t an option. Not after the way she
talked to her father. Yet being here at Negan’s didn’t feel right either.

Taking some time to sit to herself, she reached for the photo album and started to flip through it
seeing that it was put together very nicely. It was something she assumed that maybe Lucille made.
It was pictures of the two of them happy. Everything seemed perfect in the photos and she felt very
self-conscious staring at these photos. Lucille was beautiful and by the looks in the photos she
could tell that Negan loved her very much. Setting the album back down on the coffee table, she
just sat there thinking everything over.

God knows how long she sat there. There were so many thoughts swirling through her head and
she couldn’t get them to stop. Her father’s words were eating away at her. The things they told her
growing up about romance and love just repeating in her head. Was she fucking everything up for
someone that in the end didn’t even care about her?

When the sun started to raise, she realized that she had sat there long enough. Getting up from the
bed, she moved toward Negan’s bedroom and when she entered, she saw that he was sleeping with
his face buried in one of the pillows. Knowing that she wanted to talk to him, she wasn’t quite sure
how to handle her feelings.

Slamming the door shut to get Negan to wake up, she saw him jump and he let out a loud groan
when he lifted his head from the bed. Watching him while she leaned back against the door, she
could see that his head looked to the side toward his nightstand.

“Fuck,” Negan looked at the condom wrapper and reached for it. In a hurry, he looked over his
shoulder to see if someone was in bed with him and his hair was an absolute mess. When he
searched the room and his eyes connected with hers, he let out a thankful sound and lowered back
into the bed. “Good morning.”

“What? Why was your reaction that?” she pondered thinking that was a strange reaction to Negan
seeing a condom wrapper on the nightstand. Negan lifted his head and stared out at her with a
confused expression. “Why was your first reaction to panic?”

“I didn’t remember why it was there,” Negan answered, his eyes narrowing out at her and he let out
a nauseated sound. Negan’s palm slid in over his abdomen and he let out small yawn. Negan was
being so nonchalant about everything that it was kind of pissing her off. “I uh…I haven’t done
great things in the past when I would drink tequila so my mind went south.”

“Oh, so you thought you fucked someone else when you were dating me?” she inquired, folding
her arms in front of her chest watching Negan pull himself into a sitting position by pressing his
back against the headboard. Negan reached up to pinch at the bridge of his nose and she huffed.
“How much do you remember about last night?”

“At the moment, not a whole hell of a lot,” Negan was honest, his deep voice filling the air. “I just
have a splitting fucking headache.”

“Yeah,” she felt her body shaking with anger over what happened earlier and her jaw flexed. “I
guess I should have listened to my gut when I said I shouldn’t have sex with you when you were
drunk last night.”

Negan didn’t say anything, just reached or the bottle of water that was on his nightstand. Watching
him drink down the water, she felt her chest aching and she cleared her throat uneasily, “I think…I
think I have to stop this relationship. I’ll live in the bedroom for a while just to get my head over
water, but I think we need to end this.”

“Whoa. Hold on! Did I do something last night?” Negan finished with his water, a surprised
expression flooding over his features. Negan looked to the condom wrapper and let out a nervous
sound. “Did I do something to hurt you with sex?”

“No. You made love to me last night. It was very romantic and sweet,” she swallowed down hard
and Negan’s eyebrows furrowed when she answered him. Clearly, he was confused with what was
going on between them. It was a shame that Negan didn’t remember what happened between them
the night before because it was so damn romantic. Being offended may have been petty, but the
fact he couldn’t remember sleeping with her hours earlier really infuriated her.

“Did I do that?” Negan looked to her face and there was a rush of panic that flooded him when he
eyed over the bruise that was on her face. Lifting her hand up, she traced her fingers over the area
and let out a tense laugh. The fact that he thought he did it really blew her mind. What exactly did
Negan think he was capable of when he was drunk?

“No, that was my father,” she reminded him and Negan brushed his fingers through his thick, dark
hair attempting to pull together everything that happened last night in his mind. “Damn, you really
did black out all of last night, didn’t you?”

“I remember bits and pieces; it will come back to me. I just…I don’t know what I did wrong,”
Negan declared, his face twisting with confusion and he cleared his throat uneasily. “Why do you
want to break up with me then?”

“Because you don’t want to be with me,” she explained watching Negan throw his legs over the
side of the bed. It took him a minute to gather himself before he stood up from the bed and dropped
the sheets that were loosely wrapped around his hips. With Negan standing before her completely
naked, she found herself uncomfortable. “I think I’m just someone you are with so you feel better
about yourself and not so lonely. I was just the first person that you could get.”

“Why would you say that?” Negan stammered and he saw her look down. Lowering his gaze, her
eyes were locked on his left hand and he swallowed down hard. They had mentioned his wedding
ring when they had first started fooling around together, but she never expressed that it bothered
her that he still wore it. Which made it awkward for him that she would immediately go to
breaking up instead of just mentioning it to him.

“You’re still wearing that wedding ring. Even weeks into our relationship,” she pointed out and
Negan swallowed down hard, his eyes looking suddenly sad when she said that. “You forgot to
mention to me that yesterday was your anniversary with Lucille and that’s why you went out with
your friend to get wasted off your ass.”

“I didn’t think it was necessary to bring it up,” Negan claimed, his head tipping to the side while
she felt her face flushing over with red. She was angry. She wanted to scream at him. She wanted to
erupt, but she was doing her best to keep it together. “You’re breaking up with me because I didn’t
tell you that my anniversary with my dead wife was yesterday?”

“I’m breaking up with you because I don’t think you actually care about me!” she finally raised her
voice to him and Negan’s jaw flexed while he stared out at her. “You’re still head over heels in
love with your wife. Your wallet is full of her. You still wear your wedding ring and last night…
you called me her name.”

“Shit,” Negan cussed, an overwhelmed breath falling from his throat when he heard her getting
upset and he lifted his hand to lower his head into his palm. Hearing that immediately made him
regret that he let his friend talk him into going to the bar last night. One memory of his wife led to
hurtful ones. Ones that he didn’t want to remember and instead chose to drink the pain away
instead of thinking everything out. “I wasn’t thinking clearly. I was obviously so very drunk and
I’m sorry, but it must have been an accident. Because I know how I feel about you. If I was in the
right state of mind, I would have never…”

“Just stop,” she threw her hands up in the air in attempts to cut him off. Tears burned at her eyes.
This was really hurting her more than it was making her feel better about things. “I got into a fight
with my father because he was angry with me for having a relationship with someone. He thought I
was throwing my life away and you convinced me last night that everything he said was wrong, but
obviously he was right about me. I’m wasting my life dating someone.”

“I don’t understand,” Negan tried to reason with her, stepping forward and she reached forward to
shove into the center of his chest making him wince when she did it. “You knew that I was still
upset about my wife. I’ve just…I’ve had a hard time with it, okay? It was very tragic the way she
died. Just because I have those feelings for her though doesn’t mean that everything I’ve said to
you isn’t genuine. All the things I said, I meant them. Every word. Fuck, just relax and think this
out.”

“Everything that happened with your wife and how you’re feeling is why you shouldn’t be with
me,” she stammered, her bottom lip tremoring while she stood before him. Knowing that he was
still in love with a ghost of a person hurt. Especially when she told him that she loved him and his
response was talking to his late wife. “You are still so visibly obsessed with your wife and the only
reason you brought me into your life was because you were lonely.”

“You knew that!” Negan pointed out with a frown and she let out a hesitant breath hating to hear
him agree with her. “I told you that when we first got together. I was just looking for someone to
spend time with me because I was lonely, but that’s not how things ended up going. I ended up
feeling things for you. Things that I haven’t felt for anyone in a very long time.”

“You say that, but I think that’s what you say in order to feel better about everything,” she shook
her head and Negan let out a frustrated grunt. At this point they both probably thought the other
was talking in circles and not making a whole lot of sense. “You started dating me to appease me.
You had sex with me to make me feel like I was special so I would stick around. I don’t even think
you like me that much. You barely have sex with me. You don’t even let me touch you. I’ve never
even given you a full blowjob. When you have sex with me, it has to be done a certain way. We
just can’t even have sex.”

“Giving me a blowjob proves to you that I like you?” Negan repeated her words in almost a laugh
and it made her angry enough to step forward to shove into him again. Looking down at his chest
where his flesh was turning red from being hit by her made him grunt out. “I thought you liked the
way our relationship was. I’ve tried to make things romantic and perfect for you. What exactly
have I been doing wrong?”

“People in relationships fuck Negan. They fuck a lot,” she snapped at him and Negan’s chest was
falling and rising heavily while she continued to yell at him.

“Most people fucking hate each other,” Negan reminded her with a frown, his face twisting with
confusion. Everything she was saying was making no sense to him at all. Her reasoning for
breaking up with him just didn’t add up to him. “So because I want to be romantic with you and I
want to make every moment special, I don’t care about you? I’m in the wrong for doing that? Make
me understand that. You’re not making any sense. In order for me to prove that I like you, I have to
fuck you? Making love to you is proving to you that I don’t like you? Fucking make sense in that
comment Y/N! If you were thinking correctly and you weren’t upset with whatever went down
with your father yesterday, you would realize how ridiculous this sounds!”

“I’m just saying that I think you only sleep with me to appease me. That way I stick around. You’re
leading me on,” she restated and Negan let out a tiny laugh before dropping down to sit at the
bottom of the bed. “You are so fucking lonely and you miss your wife. That’s why you want
someone here. You don’t want to be alone. So you swooped up the first person that you could find
and you did what you could to keep her in your life.”

“Please tell me more about my elaborate plan to swoop you up,” Negan’s head tilted to the side,
his tongue dragging out over his bottom lip while his big eyes looked up at her. “I just find this
interesting. From the first moment I laid eyes on you, I knew that I was interested in you. The more
I learned about you, the more I realized that I wanted to be with you. Not in just the way our
original stupid plan we came up with was. I knew that I wanted to spend as much time as I could
with you. I like everything about you. It has nothing to do with not wanting to be alone. If all I
wanted was company at night, I would just go to the bar every night and pick someone up. That’s
not what I wanted. I wanted you. I want you.”

“Because I remind you of Lucille. You’ve already told me that,” she recalled that in the past that he
told her that she had similarities with his late wife.

“Yeah, so I have a type. So what?” Negan threw his hands up in the air and he let out a scoff. “I’m
attracted to strong people. People that are tough as nails, but I don’t like you because you remind
me of Lucille. I like you because of you. There is no one else like you. I look forward to every day
that I get to spend with you because…”

“Last night you told me that you want me to feel comfortable enough to come to you and tell you
everything. You wanted me to open up to you about all that I could,” she felt her emotions getting
the best of her while her and Negan went back and forth. “I tell you about my feelings and
emotions. I tell you what my father did to me and how it made me feel. Things you don’t even
remember right now and you can’t even talk to me about your late wife. You can’t tell me that it
was your fucking anniversary. I don’t even know when she died. You want me to be a certain way,
but you can’t even be that way yourself. You rarely tell me anything. I just know about your past.
Things that I learn when Sam is around.”

“Because I want to start over new with you,” Negan reasoned with her, his hands raising in the air
trying to find a way to make things clear to her. “By talking about the past, I’m just going to get
upset. I suppose I should have told you it was our anniversary, but I didn’t want to bother you with
it. You’re already going through so much and I’m doing my best to protect you from…”

“You think you are protecting me by lying to me?” she demanded an answer and Negan bobbed
his head in a way that showed her comment upset him.

“By not telling you, I’m lying to you? I just didn’t tell you,” Negan grumbled, his throat flexing as
he spoke. “I’m trying to be the best version of myself for you. I want to lift you up. I want to make
your life perfect. I want to make you happy. If I’m feeling down, I don’t want to weight heavy with
you on things. You’ve just been so worried and stressed that I just don’t want to make shit worse
for you. You shouldn’t have to carry my baggage too. Not when you are working so hard on your
future and making things right for you.”

“Shouldn’t that be my decision?” she headed over toward Negan’s dresser to grab a pair of pants
and she threw them at Negan. They hit the center of his chest and dropped into his lap making him
grunt. Having him sitting in front of her naked was irritating her and truthfully distracting. Instead
of putting them on, Negan set them beside him and tilted his head to the side. “You’ve had me
wrapped around your finger the last few days. Thinking that there was something here, but I
dropped your wallet yesterday. Your wallet is still full of Lucille. You wear the ring. You call me
her name. It’s not me that you want. It’s Lucille.”

“That’s not true,” Negan insisted, shaking his head again and again. Frustrations were growing
inside of him the more she continued to ramble on and not listen to him. “I care about you. So
much. I know I carry baggage, but I told you that originally. I know how I feel. Yes, I will always
love Lucille. Losing her was hard. Really fucking hard on me, but I know how I feel about you.”

Clenching her fists at her side, she dropped back against the wall and wanted to scream. It was so
hard to get through to Negan why she felt the way she did. Even though he was trying, his
explanations were just not helping her. At all.

“What do I have to do for you to prove to you that you are what I want?” Negan watched her move
for the door and he stood up from the bed letting out a nervous breath. “I don’t remember what
happened last night and I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. Okay? Just talk to me about things. We
can work through this together. We just have to calm down together and talk this out like adults.
Stop accusing things and shit. Just work it out together like real couples do.”

“I already told you. In short, my father lectured me about having a relationship after I vaguely told
my mother I was dating an older man. Called me a slut. Told me that I should have just let my
professor rape me because then at least I would have finished school. That if my professor looked
like you, I would have let him fuck me. Then when I told him he was being abusive, he smacked
me,” she went to continue and Negan let out an upset breath. “It really fucked me up.”

“And I get that because that’s absurd of your father to say and it makes him a real motherfucker,”
Negan asserted, keeping the same opinion that he had last night. She already heard what Negan
thought last night about everything. It didn’t really appeal to her to hear it all over again. “I’m sorry
that I don’t remember last night, but I’m sure I told you how fucked up I think that way. Just
hearing that the son of bitch hit you like he did makes me want to walk over there and give him a
piece of my fucking mind.”

“Yeah, well we debated over that last night too and I was able to convince you to stay here with
me,” she told everything that took place last night and Negan’s eyes were filled with sorrow while
he stared out at her. “Then I asked you to make me feel better knowing that you were crazy drunk.
You made love to me and then called me Lucille in your sleep.”

“I called you Lucille in my sleep? I thought I called you Lucille while we were having sex,” Negan
blurt out watching the way that her eyebrows arched up when he reached for her and she shoved
him away. Instead of being able to comfort her, she just kept hitting him and pushing him away
from her. “Did you think maybe I was having a nightmare? That I was dreaming of her?
Considering it was our anniversary.”

“Does it matter?” she uttered and Negan threw his hands up in the air. “You’re still in love with
your wife and that’s never going to change. I can’t be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t
have enough room for me.”

“I don’t understand. I want you in my life. I’ve apologized, what more can I do?” Negan begged for
some kind of direction on how to fix things. “You have no idea how important you are to me. How
much I care about you. If you did, we wouldn’t be having this conversation. Just give me a chance
to talk things out with…”

Stepping forward, he let out another wince she hit him in the chest again to get him away from her.
Maybe she was being too rough with him. What Negan had done wasn’t really that bad, but the last
twenty-four hours had really been rough on her and she was having trouble controlling herself.

“Fine,” Negan called out and she looked over her shoulder to see him reaching for his ring. Feeling
her chest aching she saw him tugging at the ring in attempts to get it from his finger. When he
finally got it from his finger, he swallowed down hard and looked at it. There was a sense of
misery behind his eyes, but he was trying to move past it. “If taking my ring off proves to you that
I want to be with you, I’ll do it.”

Negan moved over toward the side of the bed to open his nightstand to throw the ring inside. When
he turned around to face her, he threw his hand up to look at his bare hand and let out a shuddering
breath, “It’s gone and if you want me to open up to you about why I am the way I am. I will.”

Standing near the doorway, her big eyes waited for his response. The fact he took his ring off for
her said a lot, but she didn’t know if that’s exactly what she was going for. It was obvious that he
was really upset about taking that ring off. It had to be for the first time since she passed away.
Originally, she thought that would be a good feeling, but it really wasn’t.

“I was a shitty husband. A really shitty fucking husband. I was an asshole. I didn’t realize how
good I had it. I cheated. I did bad things,” Negan explained with a sad breath and she could hear his
deep, raspy voice filled with layers of sadness she hadn’t heard before. “I fucked up so bad. We got
together when we were kids. I don’t think I realized how much I truly valued my relationship with
her. I was a shitty fucking person Y/N. It took her getting sick for me to get my shit together. Did I
love her through all of that? Yeah. I loved her more than anything. I just didn’t think about her
when I was going out trying to make myself feel better. I told you, I’m not perfect. I’m a terrible
human being. I hurt people. I say shitty things and I don’t even care about it.”

The way Negan’s chest fell and rose showed he was getting really worked up and she didn’t know
if she should even say anything at all, “From the moment I got with you…I just wanted to be with
you. I wanted to do everything right. I wanted to focus on everything wrong I did when I was
married and make it right. I just don’t want to mess things up with you. I’ve wanted you to know
how perfect you are. How much I care about you. How much I want you in my fucking life and I
thought I was doing everything right. I didn’t realize I was fucking up…”

“It wasn’t that you were…you weren’t fucking up,” she felt the heat spreading out into her face.
“You were perfect in every way Negan. The problem was that I thought you wanted to be with me.
When you really just want a replacement for your wife because you are lonely. I never took into
consideration that you still loved your wife. I don’t think you’re ready to give her up and take me
into your life.”

“I got rid of the ring, what more do you want me to do?” Negan pointed toward the drawer where
he had thrown the wedding ring. “I haven’t taken it off since she died, but for you…I just…I…”

“Hey…” she watched his bottom lip trembling while he stared out at her. Stepping forward, she
reached for his face to get him to look at her seeing that he was starting to cry. “It’s okay.”

“Please,” Negan dropped to his knees, reaching out to wrap his arms around her waist to rest his
head against her abdomen. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

“Look at me,” she reached around him to grab his wedding ring and she pushed it back down his
finger seeing the way that his hazel eyes had tears in them. “I don’t want to be the person to force
you to get over your grief Negan because then what kind of relationship would this be?”

“But for you,” Negan felt her thumb sweeping over his bottom lip and he whimpered. “Please. I
care about you. I can’t lose you. You have no idea what you have done for me. I don’t usually talk
about things, but…”

Negan’s words were cut off by her mouth hammering in over his and he eagerly kissed her back.
Repeatedly she kissed him, her breathing becoming uneven when Negan’s tongue brushed between
her lips. A gasp fell from her lips when Negan swiftly moved up and hooked his arm around her
hips to force her back against the bed.

Reaching underneath his shirt that she was wearing, he reached for her panties and tugged them off
in a single fluid movement. Tossing the material aside, he got up on his feet and lowered in over
her to reach between them. Lining up his body with hers, he plunged forward and heard her gasp
when he entered her. Thrusting over and over again, Negan kept his mouth hovered over hers and
he winced with every movement he made.

“If you want me to have sex with you to prove I care about you, I will. Just please don’t break up
with me,” Negan whimpered as her fingers wrapped around the back of his neck to pull him in
closer to her so her lips could collide with his. There was a desperation to the way he moved inside
of her in attempts to prove to her that he would give her what she wanted from him. Pulling his
mouth from hers, he nuzzled his nose against the side of her neck and winced. “You’re everything
to me.”

Saying nothing, she just kissed over his jawline and whimpered every time he would buck forward
into her. Clutching tightly to him, she knew that he was trying to appease her and she didn’t even
know why she was being so hard on him. Negan’s soft moans vibrated against the side of her neck.
Delicate nibbles were placed over the side of her neck making her purr out his name. Dragging her
fingers up into his hair, she tugged at it to get him to look down at her. With his eyes locked on
hers, she felt like the world was spinning around her.

With a bit of force, Negan grabbed her arms and urged them back against the bed. His palms
hooked tightly around her wrists. Pinning them down, Negan gave her a stern expression and
lowered to nip at her jawline making her coo out loud. There was no doubt that Negan was
attempting to be more powerful than he usually would be with her. She complained about them
having sex a certain way and he was trying to deliver on what she was complaining about.

Maybe it was because she was already so worked up from them fighting, but every sensation was
enhanced. The filling, stretching feeling she had with Negan inside of her was something that she
still hadn’t gotten used to. Hissing out, she felt Negan varying between kisses and small bites at the
side of her neck. After each bite, his tongue would drag across the area making her whimper out.
Every plunge his body made inside of her made a smacking sound when his hips would buck up
against her.

“Negan,” she cried out his name against the side of his neck when she lifted her head in attempts to
look between them, but he released one of his hands from her wrists. Negan’s fingers wrapped
around her neck to persuade her head back against the bed again making her moan out when he
rolled his hips a different way. “God…”

“Look at me,” Negan demanded, keeping a firm hold of her throat while he put a small amount of
pressure on it. Dropping his head back, Negan’s eyes closed and his Adam’s apple bounced in his
throat. There was a steady pace that he had started between them and he knew that he had found
that certain spot that would make her shake. Every movement would hit her g-spot just right
making her eyes slam shut. Her hips raised and when he took notice that she started to tremor, his
thrusts got harder and faster.

“Negan,” she probably screamed out his name through gritted teeth when her hips and thighs
started to convulse uncontrollably underneath him. A hot liquid warmth rushed throughout her
entire body. It gave her a head rush and for a minute it felt like she could pass out beneath him
from how hard her orgasm actually hit her. With his thrusts coming to a halt, she groaned out and
finally met his stare. His hand released her throat and there was a drip of sweat at the tip of his
nose. His messy hair was in his dark eyes. His lips were agape, a thin layer of sweat covering his
slender body. Gasping, she felt Negan flipping her over onto her stomach. “Fuck.”

“Get on your knees,” Negan ordered standing at the side of the bed, reaching for her hips to grab
her to help her settle herself where he wanted her. Stepping in behind her, Negan’s fingers gripped
tightly to her flesh when he lined up behind her. Nervous breaths fell from her throat while she
tried to balance herself on her hands. With shaking arms, she knew that her body was still worked
up from the orgasm that Negan had gotten from her. Negan filled her again in a swift, fluid
movement and it made her whimper out. “Fuck, you feel so good.”

Curling her fingers around the sheets, she balled them up in her fists and listened to the sounds of
their skin smacking together when Negan’s slender hips thrust up against her bottom. Closing her
eyes, she mewled out his name again and again while Negan had his way with her. This wasn’t
how Negan would normally sleep with her. He took her complaints and he was trying to meet the
needs of things that she was asking from him. There was a guilt factor building up inside of her
because this felt ridiculously good, but she knew that it shouldn’t have happened like this. It felt
like she forced Negan into this, but she didn’t have it in her to stop him.

Looking over her shoulder, she appreciated the sights of his abdomen’s movements while he
pistoned himself into her repeatedly. Negan licked over his lips, his eyebrows tightening together
while he continued his actions. Releasing one his hands from her hips, his hand stretched out to run
up her back, toward her shoulders until he grabbed a tight hold of her hair.

“Is this what you wanted?” Negan grunted from behind her causing her to purr out in ecstasy with
the way that he moving inside of her. “Is it everything you thought it would be?”

“Yes,” she answered honestly. Maybe that was bad, but it was the way she always pictured Negan
fucking her from the moment he walked into her life. It’s not that the other ways were bad, she
liked them very much, but part of her craved this just once. “Please…please keep going.”

It wasn’t long before Negan had her crying out his name when her body shuddered in absolute bliss
after he got her to another release. Lowering down, she tried to catch her breath. Everything was
hot. The sounds she was making showed just how over the top she probably was right now, but the
orgasms he was drawing out of her had her body right on the edge of collapsing.

Getting her to lower down onto her stomach, Negan crawled in over her and balanced his weight on
his arms. Negan reached for her hands, hooking his fingers with hers while his mouth kissed over
her jawline.

“You just want to belong to me, right?” Negan slurred when his kisses hovered over her ear and
she nodded. “You’ve been controlled your whole life that you want to be dominated in the
bedroom too. You yearn for that, don’t you?”

“Yes,” she panted while Negan’s hips smacked up against her bottom.

“And you like the way that daddy makes you cum?” Negan confirmed getting her to kiss him and
when he pulled away, he nipped at her bottom lip tugging on it slightly. “You’ve just wanted this
kind of sex from the first moment you met me. You’re addicted to my big cock, aren’t you?”

Instead of answering, she simply nodded, but Negan pulled one of his hands from hers and his
fingers curled around her jaw to get her to turn her head to look at him, “Aren’t you?”

“I am,” she agreed hearing his moans filling the air and Negan’s eyes slammed shut. The way his
jaw was flexing, she could tell that he was about to cum making her bite down on her bottom lip.
Negan’s hips strained behind her, his cock pulsating inside of her body while he continued with his
rough movements. “Please don’t stop…”

“You want me to cum inside of you?” Negan growled, his mouth hovering over hers and she
eagerly nodded. Winces were falling from Negan’s throat while he continued to roll his hips a
certain way. “You just want daddy to fill you up with his seed. Daddy is going to give you exactly
what you fucking want.”

With uneven moans, she felt Negan bury himself deep inside of her when she felt the first hints of
his release inside of her. Pumping her full of his cum, Negan continued to thrust into her from
behind and she eagerly met his lips. The passion behind the kiss while he emptied himself in her
tight body blew her away when Negan fell in over her. Tiny tremors still filled her entire body.
What Negan had just done to her was better than anything she could have pictured or even dreamt
of.

Panting, she loved the warmth of Negan laying in over her and while there was still that sad feeling
at the pit of stomach…the sadness had left her in that small amount of time after the passion had
escalated to such levels between them.

Finally pulling his hips away, Negan palmed in over her bottom before falling in beside her on the
bed. Laid out on his back, Negan’s breaths were drawing attention to his slender torso and she
turned on her side. Tracing her fingers over the center of his abdomen, she heard him grunt when
he lifted his head. They didn’t talk, but she kissed over the center of his chest. She didn’t know
where they stood now after everything, but truthfully, she didn’t care. After that? She was on a
high and she wasn’t ready to come back down from it. Real life and all the drama could wait.
Dragging herself in closer to Negan, she rest her head in over the center of his chest and felt his arm
hooking around. With his fingers stroking over her shoulder, she knew one thing he said was right.
She was addicted to him and she knew that she still loved him. Things were just complicated and
there was no changing that.
 Chapter 12
Chapter Summary

After their fight, Negan does everything he can to try to prove to Y/N that he is willing
to do whatever it takes for him to show her what she means to him.

Chapter Notes

Caution, one of the characters talks about suicidal thoughts in this chapter. Some of
this is a big angsty, but I hope you enjoy the chapter. As always comments are
appreciated. And my bad if there are any glaring errors. It's 5AM.

“Baby girl,” Negan moaned out, dropping his head back against the couch while his hands grasped
tightly to Y/N’s hips. This was not how he wanted this day to go, but after their fight it was what
seemed to follow. One naughty sex session led to another and then another. At this point, they had
been pretty much all over the house with each other. The kitchen, the bathroom, the bedroom and
now they were laid out on the couch in the living room. A roar fell from Negan’s throat when her
nails dug into his chest, dragging down and slightly breaking the skin. Lifting his head, he looked
down at his chest and panted. His big eyes raised and he could tell that she was completely lost
within herself. Her head was tipped back, her eyes closed while she rode over his body in a way she
clearly enjoyed. He knew that by the sounds that she was making. Helping to urge her movements
over his hips, Negan rocked her over him and his moans were filling the air. “Fuck me…”

The muscles in Negan’s neck flexed, his loud breaths filling the air. At this point, he wasn’t sure
how she still had the energy inside of her to do all of this, but she did. For someone so new to
everything, she sure as fuck was eager to get it all in. Lifting up enough to mouth in over the side of
her neck, Negan bit softly at her flesh and heard her purr. After today, they both were left with
marks from the other. Their sex had been a little bit all over the place to say the least.

A wince fell from Negan’s throat when her fingers hooked into his thick hair, yanking his head
back. With his lust filled hazel eyes, he kept his stare locked on hers and a cocky smile expanded
over his features with the cries she was making with him inside of her.

In almost urgency, she brought his mouth to hers and their lips collided. It was a rough, sloppy
kiss. By the sounds that she was making, Negan knew that she was about to hit another orgasm. At
this point, he lost count how many she had. Pretty quickly Negan had learned her body and he
learned it well. Sliding his palms over her back, Negan took his time to admire her while she
bounced herself over his masculinity. This time it was about her taking control and he understood
it. While she liked being dominated, she still wanted to have those times where she had the power
in her hands. That was just the kind of person that she was. Originally, he had told her that he
didn’t think he had it in him do this again. Hell, he was hung over and probably dehydrated, but
that didn’t stop her. Cupping her bottom in his hands, Negan squeezed at the flesh and heard her
cry out.
“You can’t get enough of that big cock, can you?” Negan talked dirty to her. Was it something he
preferred to do? Honestly no, but she fucking loved it and he was going to go through with
whatever she wanted in order to make her happy. When he said that, a wicked smile tugged at the
corners of her lips. He wasn’t wrong. “You’re such a good girl…”

Smacking firmly at her bottom caused her to let out a surprised sound, but a satisfied breath
followed. Forcefully she grabbed at the center of his neck and put pressure on it making him take
in a sharp breath when her thumb pressed in over the soft fleshy part of it.

“You are so fucking beautiful,” Negan spoke what he was feeling. Even if this wasn’t what he
wanted when it came to sex, she was still was fucking gorgeous to him. Palming in over the side of
her body and up her shoulders, his hand came to rest at the curve of her neck before he lifted up
enough to bring their lips together.

When she tensed up over him and clung tightly to his body, it was evident her orgasm was
approaching. Taking initiative, Negan bucked his hips up toward her rocking motions and the
sounds she was making were like a perfect melody of a job being well done. Over and over again
he met her movements until her moans filled the air. It drew her thighs to twitch. Shuddering, she
exhaled loudly. Instead of taking the time to experience her orgasm, she pushed firmly into the
center of Negan’s chest to get him to lay back. Her thumb traced over the prominent vein at the
side of Negan’s throat making him swallow down hard.

Bringing her hips back against him drew him to release a sharp breath of air. Each movement over
his body grew harder. The deep plunges of his cock into her tight body were drawing certain
sounds from her that she didn’t even know she could make, but Negan liked it. Trying to cling to
her, Negan was doing his best to keep some kind of control, but she was using his body the way
she wanted and he could feel his hands start to shake. By the look in her eyes, she knew exactly
what she was doing to him. One of her hands was braced over his neck and the other was over his
chest while the muscles flexed beneath her touch.

“That’s it daddy. Cum inside of me,” her body was still contracting around his and it felt so fucking
good. A fire built up in the pit of his stomach, the tension building in his thighs while she took all
of him repeatedly. Throwing his head back, Negan bit into his bottom lip and groaned out. Line
after line of his cum shot out inside of her and she didn’t stop until he was done. Even then she
took her time to slow down and let things come to a halt. When she lowered down in over him,
Negan was panting. His breathing was uneven and he let out an exhausted laugh. Noticing her
patting him on the chest afterwards made him snort. “Good boy.”

“I think that has to be it today sweetheart. I don’t know how much more I have inside me. I have to
replenish and get some fluids inside of me,” Negan looked down between them when her hips
unhurriedly started to pull from his. His cock smacked up against his abdomen and Negan let out a
shuddering breath when some of his release mixed with hers dripped from her body onto his. The
pounding of his heart was a steady rhythm and his pulse was leaping in his throat. “You’re going to
be the death of me.”

“Let’s hope not,” she dragged her fingers through the mess over his body. Negan watched her with
big eyes when she brought her fingertips up to her lips. Wrapping her lips around them, she
seductively sucked at her fingertips which made Negan whimper. Lowering her gaze, she saw the
action drew his erection to twitch. The sight made her smile while she dragged her fingers along
her bottom lip humming at the taste that lingered. After a minute of looking him over, she lowered
her hand to trace her fingertips teasingly over the shaft of his softening cock. It made Negan groan
out and arch up closer to her. Licking her lips, she was proud that she could draw this kind of
reaction out of Negan. Negan was such a strong-willed person, but she had him wrapped around her
pinky finger and she loved it. “You say you don’t have more in you, but it wouldn’t take much to
get you going again.”

“No, I guess not, but a heart attack might follow,” Negan raised his right hand to place it over the
center of his chest, patting softly at it. Lifting his head up, he watched while her fingers wrapped
around his body and her thumb circled over the sensitive area of the underside of his cock where
the tip met the shaft. “I’m serious baby girl, if you want to keep going, I’m going to need some
water.”

Dramatically she sighed and released him, dropping forward onto his chest which caused him to
groan with how roughly she did it. Instinctively, he wrapped her up in his arms and peppered kisses
against her temple, “How are you feeling?”

“Me?” she muttered and he nodded. “Why?”

“Well, we’ve done a bit,” Negan reminded her, humming to himself when she cuddled herself up
closer to him. “And it’s been kind of…”

“Rough?” she finished his statement when his words lingered. “Did you think you would ruin me
with your big dick?”

“That’s not exactly the way I would put it,” Negan snorted with her bluntness knowing that he was
no angel when it came to being blunt, but it was strange coming from her. “I just mean we’ve had a
lot of fucking sex today and I could use a nap. So, I could only imagine how you are feeling.”

“I’m tired and sore, but the way it makes me feel trumps those feelings,” she slurred pressing wet
kisses over the center of Negan’s chest. “You have no idea how good it feels with you inside of
me. To have you filling me to brim. It’s incredible. I live for the moment you cum inside of me.
The face you make when you have an orgasm. Fuck, it’s to die for.”

Lifting up enough, she kissed at the side of his neck. A wince fell from his throat when her wet
kisses traced over his skin followed by soft bites. Earlier he was terrified that she was breaking up
with him. Now after what they had done all morning and far into the afternoon, he was hoping this
was a sign that he was proving to her that he was willing to do the things that she wanted. “I
swear…with you in my arms everything in the world feels right.”

Fuck. Saying that made her mouth pull from his throat. An overwhelmed breath escaped her lips,
followed by her lowering her head down against the curve of his neck. Frowning, Negan was
surprised that she didn’t say anything in return. Yeah, she had been trying to get frisky with him
again and by him saying something romantic, it probably shut her down. He just wished that she
would have had a response to him. Maybe he shouldn’t have been hurt by it. She was still laying in
his arms, cuddling up to him, but it bothered him. While he understood he hurt her feelings, he
apologized profusely. It was going to take more for her to forgive him, but he didn’t know what
else he could really do at this point. There was so much he wanted to say. More than anything he
wanted to reason with her. Part of him felt like she was being a little sensitive to things. Part of him
felt like she was taking advantage a bit of his emotions for her. There was no doubting that he felt
deeply for her. Ultimately, she knew that he felt greatly for her. Still it seemed like she was playing
him a bit, but he wouldn’t question it. He’d do anything for her because at the end of the day, he
just knew that he didn’t want to lose her. So instead of pushing the tension, he just stayed quiet and
enjoyed her being in his arms.

By the time his body finally started to relax, something had entered his mind that he hadn’t really
thought about before. Multiple times today, she wanted him to finish inside of her. Since that was
what she wanted, he really didn’t question it. Yet, the longer he laid there, the more his panic
began to grow, “You are taking something, right?”

“Taking something?” she repeated his words and it made Negan shift uncomfortably beneath her.
God, this shouldn’t have felt as uncomfortable as it did.

“You asked me to cum inside you today. I have multiple times,” Negan reminded her and he heard
her scoff which turned into a bit of a laugh. The warmth of the chuckle radiated against his skin.
His jaw flexed and he was trying his best not to respond in a negative light. Why exactly was that
funny?

“You think I would let you do that if I wasn’t?” she retorted and Negan didn’t know what to
answer. At this point, he knew that she hadn’t been with a lot of people. While she was one of the
smartest people he knew, sometimes when things got heated people didn’t think about the things
they were doing because what they were doing felt too good. “I told you a long time ago I was
taking birth control.”

“I just figured I should ask in case we needed to get something more,” Negan knew that he kind of
regretted letting things get as far as they did today, but he was in fact doing what she wanted. It
was her request and he was eager to give it to her to get her to keep her happy.

“Trust me Negan, if I’m having trouble with this relationship, I certainly don’t want to be stuck
with a baby,” her words were filled with a bit of venom and Negan didn’t know how to take that
comment. Instead of questioning her on it, he laid there for a moment lost in his own thoughts.

“Because a baby with me would be an awful thing?” Negan finally spoke up after letting those
words circle in his mind for a while. His comment surprised her when she lifted her head from his
chest to look up at him. Yeah, maybe he was reacting poorly, but it kind of hurt his feelings the
way she said that. It almost sounded like she was disgusted at the idea of having a child with him.
“I think I’d make a pretty good dad, don’t you?”

“Where the hell did that come from?” she braced her hand over the center of Negan’s sweaty chest.
Tilting her head to the side, her eyebrows arched and Negan swallowed down hard. “I don’t even
want children Negan. It has nothing to do with you and if I ended up pregnant, I’d be kind of pissed
off.”

“Well sometimes that shit happens when you ask someone to cum inside of you,” Negan reminded
her with a snort, his jaw flexing when he thought about everything that happened between the two
of them. “It’s why I haven’t been coming inside of you before today. I wanted to keep everything
safe because I know how important your future is to you.”

“You came inside of me because you know how good it feels,” she slurred, lowering her head to
press tender kisses over the center of his chest. Gradually sliding her kisses down, her lips covered
his nipple. Twirling her tongue around it, she heard him wince when she sucked softly at it before
nipping at the flesh. “I can see the look in your eyes when you cum in me. It’s the purest form of
ecstasy. The feel of your big cock throbbing inside of me is unlike anything I’ve ever felt before.
Every ridge, every vein…”

A shuddering breath fell from his throat when she reached down to trace her fingertips over his
length. When her palm reached down to cup and caress over his testicles, his eyes slammed shut
which made her smile, “You love the feeling when your balls tighten up and you shoot your seed
into me. There is a part of you that acts like your above it, but you like my hot pussy and the fear of
it all turns you on so fucking much. I can feel it when you bury yourself inside of me. You want to
fill me with your cum. I see the way your eyes dilate with desire when you do it.”
“It actually scares the hell out of me,” Negan corrected her, licking over his lips when his eyes
finally opened. There was a sense of confusion when he stated that. “I don’t want to get you
pregnant and have you hate me forever because of it. The idea of having a baby with you doesn’t
sound that bad to me, but knowing how much you hated the idea of family scares me.”

“You shouldn’t have to worry about it because I’m on birth control,” she rolled her eyes before
lowering her head back to his chest. Pulling her hand away from his body, she frowned and closed
her eyes. Part of her thought that she could have led to another sexual moment between the two of
them with the way she was talking, but Negan made things kind of odd. “You shouldn’t take things
so seriously. We’re obviously not that serious of a couple.”

“Not that serious of a couple?” Negan repeated her words, his nose wrinkling up in disbelief
hearing her say that. “Do you know other than Lucille when I was trying to have children with her,
you’re the only person that I’ve not worn something with? There has to be a certain level of trust
for something like that.”

“Come on,” she snickered almost infuriating him with her response.

“It’s a big deal Y/N. I don’t know, I feel like we’re pretty fucking serious,” Negan retorted, his
frustrations getting the best of him as he rambled on. “Just because I got drunk and I fucked up on
the night of my anniversary with my dead wife doesn’t mean what we have isn’t important. I don’t
know what more I can do other than say I’m sorry. I said her name in my sleep Y/N.”

“You shouldn’t have to be sorry for still being in love with your late wife Negan,” her voice
seemed to be filled with disappointment which made this all the harder. Negan was hoping that he
was proving to her that he was willing to do anything and everything she wanted, but still she was
holding it against him. “There is nothing wrong with that.”

“Listen, I know you probably don’t want to talk right now about it,” Negan stammered, attempting
to find the words to have a discussion with her. When her head lifted from his chest to eye him
over, he actually felt nervous. “I know it doesn’t seem like it, but I didn’t open up about the things
about Lucille because I didn’t want you to feel like you had to carry the weight of my past too.
How she died…the way she died really fucked me up.”

“That’s obvious,” she pointed out, her fingers stroking over the center of his chest. Clearing his
throat, Negan knew that he still wanted to be careful with the things he said considering how mad
she got at him earlier.

“I just…” Negan licked his lips and shrugged his shoulders. “I would do anything for you. I don’t
think you realize that.”

“I just think we’re moving too fast,” she alerted him with a sigh, pulling herself up from his chest to
sit on the edge of the couch. Eyeballing her over, Negan lifted up on his elbow and reached out to
rub at her shoulder that was closest to him. “The way we act is like we’ve been together for years
and it’s only been a few weeks.”

“We spend every moment together. Most people who are dating don’t do something like that. You
can’t help the way you feel about things. Like we said in the past, when you know…you know,”
Negan prompted her knowing that a lot of people took their time with things, but it was easy to fall
into something with her with how they felt for each other. Grunting, Negan reached beyond her to
grab a tissue to wipe his body off before sitting up beside her. “I think it scares you with how you
feel toward me because your parents brainwashed you to believe these emotions were wrong.”

“Maybe they are right though. Relationships ruin a lot of people’s lives,” she thought back on the
things she did know about people who fell in love young. “You have high hopes and dreams of a
bright future, but then you get stuck. You never accomplish the things you dreamed of. You end up
being a deadbeat…”

“You’ll never be stuck in life being with me,” Negan reached for her hand to try to support her, but
she pulled it from his grasps before he could. “I promise you I will always do whatever I can to
help you achieve everything you want in life.”

“Yeah, it’s a nice thought to have. It really is,” she stood up from the couch, reaching for the shirt
that belonged to Negan. Pulling it on, she cleared her throat and threw her hands up in the air. After
a moment of him staring up at her, she let out an angered breath and looked away. “I wish you
wouldn’t look at me like that.”

“Like what?” Negan brushed his fingers through his hair and she kept her head lowered down
toward the ground.

“With your big puppy dog eyes where it’s obvious that you are sad. Your eyebrows say everything
and even if you’re not trying, you have this pout. It hurts seeing it,” she informed him and Negan
sighed loudly, standing up from the couch to move in behind her to try to comfort her. Caressing
his hands in over her shoulders, he felt her tense up beneath his touch. It wasn’t a lie, he was sad.
He thought they were in a good place with each other. It wasn’t until this morning where he had
any doubts about everything. He couldn’t control his face though. “You’re always smiling. It’s
strange not seeing you that way. It feels like you are trying to guilt me.”

“I swear, I wouldn’t do that shit,” Negan tried to explain, a grunt falling from his throat when she
turned around and shoved her hands into the center of his chest. The force shocked him and he fell
back onto the couch, looking up at her with surprised eyes. “What is going on here?”

“Gee, if you weren’t drunk last night…maybe you would know,” she snapped at him, stepping
back toward the hallway and Negan’s Adam’s apple bounced in his throat. Shuffling to his feet,
Negan did his best to try to keep up with her.

“I’m sorry I was drunk, but the only way I can make things better is if you talk to me,” Negan
reasoned with her, but she felt her eyes tearing over while he approached her. “We need to talk
about something. Okay? Just, let me explain something to you.”

“I think I should probably go do what I have to do right now instead of this,” she held her hand up
in the air to cut him off making Negan let out a disgusted breath when she headed for the bedroom.
Negan followed her into his bedroom while she put her clothes on. Grabbing his jeans that were
hanging over the side of the dresser, he pulled them up and left them open. “I can’t do this.”

“Hold on just a second,” Negan called out as she was gathering her things together. A hesitant
laugh fell from his throat and he threw his hands up in the air. “This…this isn’t how this is
supposed to go down.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she lied to him. It was obvious. There was a rose-
colored tint to her cheeks. The stress from everything had every muscle inside of Negan tensing up.
“I just know I need to get things done.”

“No you don’t. You’re running,” Negan grunted, folding his arms out in front of his naked chest
while he stared out at her expectantly. “I give you exactly what you want. You want naughty,
unadulterated sex and you’re panicking now. You see I’m willing to give you anything and
everything you want. It terrifies you that you have someone like that. Someone that will go above
and beyond for you. All you’ve ever done is fought for yourself. Finally including someone else…
now that shit scares the hell out of you.”

“Negan…” she frowned, her eyes looking away from him. The sound of her swallowing down hard
was heard while she thought of what to say. “You’re still in love with your wife…”

“Yes, yes I am and I will love her until the day I die,” Negan explained with a shrug of his
shoulders. Tragically losing Lucille was the hardest thing he ever had to go through and the way
things happened just screwed him up all the more. “But she’s not here anymore and I don’t want to
spend the rest of my life alone being stuck with the ghosts of my past.”

“And that’s why we’re rushing things. You don’t want to be alone,” she stubbornly responded
making Negan’s nose scrunch up when she said that. An unsatisfied grunt fell from his throat and
she knew that he was getting sick of hearing it. “You don’t know if I’m the person that you want to
be spending your life with. I’m not the one, I’m just the one for right now.”

“How do you know that?” Negan began to rebuttal with her, but instead of talking with him she
turned on her heel toward the door. Following her, he couldn’t believe that she was running away
from him when they desperately needed to have this discussion. She made it out onto the porch
when he finally was able to grab a hold of her wrist to stop her. “You aren’t even giving us a
chance to see if we’re each other’s forever one. Why are you so scared of me wanting to be with
you?”

“Because there is nothing here to like Negan. I’m a mess,” she confessed and Negan threw his
hands up in the air, frustration behind his hazel eyes. “I have had this skewed vision of life and
love for so long. You are so…bright and hopeful for something I’m not sure I’m capable of
giving.”

“You really undersell yourself; I hope you know that,” Negan’s hands slid in over his hips, drawing
attention to the v-line over his slender hips that led toward the opened part of his jeans that were
barely hanging at his body. “You’re capable of love just as much as you are capable of your dream
job because I promise you, I’m always going to be here to support you through whatever makes
you happy. I don’t want you to give up your life to make me content. I want to do whatever I can to
give you the life you want while making you happy.”

“Negan,” she sighed heavily and Negan moved forward to reach out to slide his large hands in over
her arms caressing over them in a supportive gesture. Lowering her head, she felt Negan lowering
down to press a kiss over her head before nestling his chin in over the top of her head. “I want to
believe you.”

“You can,” Negan frowned when she stepped back and he let out a disappointed breath. “What
have I done to prove to you that I will hold you back or that I don’t care about you? I said Lucille’s
name in my sleep? I didn’t see Lucille when I was making love you to you. I saw you because you
are who I want to be with. I’ve helped you with whatever you’ve needed and I will always be your
partner in everything you do if you just give me that chance.”

“I need some time,” she explained and a saddened expression flooded over Negan’s features when
she stepped further back toward the street. “I just need time to think about things…”

“What is there to think about?” Negan blurt out, his upset eyes hooked on hers when he attempted
to step forward. “This is really screwing with me Y/N. I told you that most people only want to
screw me. That they become obsessed with having sex with me and not really getting to know the
real me. You just up and leaving like this, it kind of makes me think you’re turning in the same
direction.”
“You know that’s not the case,” she turned on her heel to face him again knowing that they were
standing in the middle of the street, but she didn’t care. “Yeah, I like sex with you, but you know
that. You in general are a very addictive person. I like the way you make me feel in and out of bed.
I’m addicted to you. I crave being around you. I love being with you. I can’t get enough of you.
Whether it’s your dick or just being with you. It’s too much. You’re like a drug and I just want
more.”

“So you’re willing to walk back into that house after everything your father did because you are
realizing that I mean something special to you?” Negan watched her think things over for a
moment before backstepping away from Negan. Standing there stunned, Negan watched her head
back toward her parents’ home and let out an overwhelmed growl of frustration. When she got to
the front door, she didn’t even look back at him and Negan cussed to himself. Looking between
his house and her parents’ home, Negan started walking toward her home and when he reached the
door he thought of his next step. Reaching out, he felt that the door was unlocked and he pushed it
open to step inside. “Y/N?”

Closing the door behind him, Negan moved around in the home knowing that her mother had
given him a tour the first time he had been there, but it had been a while. Moving into the hallway,
he could see her surprised expression when she saw him standing there.

“Negan?” she muttered his name. Her eyes desperately surveyed the hallway and she nervously
shooed him away. “What are you doing?”

“I can’t let you come back here. Not after everything,” Negan still had the thoughts of her father
lingering in his mind. How sad she was and how she stressed that her father had hit her. Coming
back here to avoid him when she was facing a certain danger with her father really bothered him.
“I’m sorry, we just…we have to finish this discussion or I’m going to be extremely upset.”

“Doing this here is probably not the best idea Negan,” she stated firmly, her arms straight and tense
at the sides of her body. Negan simply shrugged. Yeah, probably not the best idea he had, but he
needed to let her know how he felt.

“I know it’s not smart, but I need to get this off my chest. You want me to open up with you? Well,
I’ll do it,” Negan’s voice was tremoring and she saw him throw his hands up in the air while he
stood before her in the hallway. Maybe she should have fought harder to get him out of her parents’
home, but she was actually impressed that he had followed her in here. “Listen, I know it’s hard
changing everything that you are and everything that you thought you were going to be for
someone else. You’d be surprised how much I changed for Lucille. We change for the people we
care about, but I’m not asking you to do that. I want you to do everything you’ve ever wanted in
life. I just want you to maybe try to let go of those fears of love that were dug so deep inside of
you. They aren’t true. It’s bullshit that was put there and I just…I want you to give me a chance to
be the person you changes the idea of relationships for you. I know that what you have with me is
something you’ve never had. You closed yourself off from it. I’m just hoping you’ll be willing to
learn the power of having someone in your life who cares about you will do for you.”

“How do you plan to do that Negan?” she folded her arms out in front of her chest when he said
what he did.

“I’m going to start by being honest with you. I’m going to tell you something that I haven’t told
anyone other than those that were the closest to me,” Negan cleared his throat and shifted
uncomfortably on his feet. “I’m not telling you this to guilt you. I’m telling you this because it’s
honest. Before you…”

Negan let out an upset breath, making him lower his head down trying to gather himself. The last
thing he wanted to do was guilt her into being with him. That’s why he was trying to hold it
together, but he couldn’t help holding back the tears that were burning at his eyes when he raised
his stare again.

“Before you came into my life, I considered killing myself. Every single day,” Negan finally
informed her, biting into his bottom lip. His eyebrows bounced up when he said it. “I almost did a
few times. I don’t want to go into the details of all the things I did because it will only hurt
bringing those things up. I don’t need you to know how broken I truly am, but I was just too much
of a pussy to get it done. It’s why I moved. Everyone thought it would be good for me to get away.
The pain wouldn’t be there as fucking much seeing the life I shared with Lucille every single day. I
guess it was the way of trying to save my own life. Only problem was? Moving didn’t help. I still
had those feelings and urges. I didn’t want to be here, but that all stopped when you started coming
around. I didn’t want to be in the ground anymore.”

When he said that, he could see her expression softening and Negan threw his hands up in the air,
“I was in so much pain that I wasn’t thinking about anything, but myself. My pain. My agony. I
wanted it all to go away. I wanted to go away. I didn’t want to be here anymore.”

Opening up to her about this worried him because he didn’t want her to know how weak he truly
felt he was, “Then you came into my life and you made me realize that I wasn’t alone. That there
was someone out there for me that could make this life better. I expected nothing, but pain and
anguish. Yet there you were. And that’s not me saying that to force you to stay with me. I just need
you to know that you…you fucking changed me. For the better. Having you in my life has already
had such a positive impact on me and I just hope, I hope one day you can see that all I want for you
is the best. I want to lift you up and help you achieve all your dreams. I’ll be sitting on the
sidelines cheering you on while also providing all the love and support that I can for you. I never
want you to go through what I went through. With how tense and uptight you’ve been because of
previous situations I never want you to fall into what I did. I just want to keep you safe. I want to
keep you happy.”

“Wow,” she muttered and he could see that her bottom lip was trembling while staring out at him.
“I’m not that special Negan. You deserve someone else. Someone else who isn’t going to give you
the shit that I have.”

“But you’re what I want,” Negan reasoned with her, his deep voice sounding even more rasp. “The
truth is…”

Negan’s eyebrows arched as he tried to gather the courage to say what he felt. When she waited
long enough, she threw her hands up and shrugged, “The truth is what Negan?”

“The truth is that I’m head over heels in love with you. Don’t you see that?” Negan blurt out,
shrugging his broad shoulders while he stood before her in the hallway. When he said that, he saw
the expression over her face change. “I would give up anything for you. I’d do anything for you
because I love you. I love you so much that the idea of not having you in my life breaks my heart
because more than anything I want you to be with me. I want us to share a future together. Maybe
it’s fast. Maybe it’s wrong, but I don’t care because I love you.”

“You love me?” she repeated his words, her breathing uneven while he nodded. “And you don’t
remember anything about last night?”

“I told you it will come back to me and whatever I did, I promise…” Negan grunted when she
swiftly moved across the hallway to wrap her arms around his shoulders. When her lips hammered
in over his, he kissed her over and over again. With his arm hooked around her waist, Negan pulled
her in closer to him. For the first time in hours, he felt a sense of relief with her reaction. “I thought
telling you I loved you would scare you away.”

“You thought wrong,” she pulled back enough to stroke over the side of Negan’s face, feeling the
dampness beneath her fingers. It touched her that Negan got emotional telling her what he did. It
caused butterflies in the pit of her stomach. “You’re not just saying that because of everything that
has been happening over the last few days?”

“God no. I’ve known I’ve fucking loved you since I held you in my arms on the air balloon. I just
didn’t want to scare you away since you were so terrified of just being in a relationship,” Negan
explained with a nervous breath while she brushed her fingers through his hair. A hesitant laugh
hitched in his throat while his thumb dragged out over her bottom lip. “So, you’re not mad?”

“I’m not mad,” she muttered, tipping up on her toes to lower him in closer to her and her lips
claimed his. Negan let out a sound of relief when she pulled her lips from his. Nuzzling her nose
against his, she kept her arms hooked around the back of his neck and sighed. “I love you too.
More than I have ever loved anything in my whole life. I never believed in the word. Not until
you.”

Instead of saying anything, Negan wrapped his arms around her waist and lifted her up from the
ground. A gasp fell from her throat when he lowered her down in closer to his chest and his large
smile expanded over his handsome features. It was the first genuine smile she had gotten from him
since last night.

“I swear, you have my whole heart. I may be still broken about Lucille, but there is no one that my
heart belongs to other than you,” Negan assured her with a hum when she peppered another round
of kisses over his lips. Setting her down carefully, Negan reached for the beaded necklace that he
was often wearing. Unhooking it Negan motioned her to wait and he pulled his wedding ring from
his finger. His eyes lingered on it for a long moment and he sighed. Sliding the ring over the
necklace, he made sure it was on there securely. Putting the necklace back on, Negan grabbed his
wedding ring and looked it over. “I hope you don’t mind me keeping it here. Just because she is
part of my life and she will always be part of me. I understand if that upsets you, but…”

“It’s fine,” she hushed him, reaching up to place her fingertips over the center of his lips to silence
him. When Negan lowered the necklace, she ran her fingers over the front of it and nodded slowly.
“In a way it makes sense. If I was your wife that passed away, I wouldn’t want you to just give up
on me either. So I think with you is where it belongs…”

“Thank you,” Negan lowered down to kiss her, but when he did the sound of a door opening was
heard and he nervously pulled away from her. They separated pretty quickly when her mother
stepped out into the hallway. Once her eyes connected with Negan’s, it made her mother jump and
Negan let out a hesitant laugh. When she noticed that Y/N was also there, her fear suddenly
became more that of confusion. When her mother looked to him again, Negan apprehensively held
his hand in the air. “Good afternoon.”

“Negan,” Y/N got his attention, pointing down toward Negan’s jeans that were still open drawing
attention to certain areas of him. Swiftly turning away from her mother, Negan pulled his pants
together and zipped them up. Pulling them further up his hips, Negan looked over his shoulder and
offered a weak smile. “Mom, I can explain this.”

“Negan is the guy?” her mother caught on pretty quickly which made Y/N go silent. When Negan
turned back to face them again, she moved in beside Negan to grab his fingers in hers. Instead of
being worried, Negan calmed himself and squeezed her hand firmly in his. “There is a part of me
that wants to ask questions, but now is neither the time nor place.”
“I agree, we should probably get the heck out of here. I’ll come back and get my stuff later,” Y/N
insisted, reaching up to place her hand over Negan’s bare chest to get him to step back. Sliding his
bare feet back against the wooden floor, Negan swallowed down hard and gave a half wave to say
goodbye. “We’ll talk later.”

“I can’t find my…” her father’s voice was heard as he followed Y/N’s mother out into the hallway
making Y/N immediately stop when her father’s eyes connected with hers. There was immediate
confusion that flooded his face when he looked between the two of them in the hallway. “What are
you doing here? What is he doing here?”

“Do you have a shirt?” Negan whispered feeling suddenly exceedingly awkward that he was
standing in her parents’ home in nothing, but a pair of jeans. When he said that, Y/N looked over
her shoulder at him and gave him a dumbfounded look. “What?”

“You expect one of my shirts to fit you?” she half laughed and Negan was surprised that she could
find amusement in a situation like this. With everything he seemed more nervous than she did with
her father finding them together in the home. “We were just leaving.”

“No, no you’re not. Wait a minute,” her father demanded, stepping forward while his angry eyes
stared out at the two of them. “Is Negan the guy? Our neighbor across the street is the guy you’ve
been fucking? You took advantage of widowed man?”

“Now wait a minute,” Negan held his hand up in the air before Y/N could even answer that
question. “What’s going on between the two of us is none of your business. I’m going to put that
out there first. Your daughter is well into her twenties and you are still acting like she’s a
teenager.”

“She lives under my roof,” her father raised his finger to point at her and Negan moved before Y/N
to keep her shielded behind him.

“Not really. She’s been living under my roof for the last few weeks and then coming around to
check on the two of you,” Negan reminded her father with a bob of his head and he could see that
her father’s face was turning rather red. “Now as I was saying, your daughter is an adult. You can’t
tell her who she sees or what she does. You’re used to being in control of someone else’s life that it
just pisses you off when you no longer can do it anymore. I’m also not some poor widow from
across the street. The first time I saw your daughter bickering with you, I knew that I wanted to
have her in my life. I’m the one that approached her.”

“You son of a bitch,” her father lunged at Negan in attempts to hit him. Negan lifted his arm,
managing to push aside the attack that her father was attempting. It caused her father to stumble
when Negan dodged the assault.

“Stand over there,” Negan motioned Y/N back toward the end of the hallway so she couldn’t get
hurt. When Y/N’s father turned back toward Negan, Negan could see that he was breathing
heavily. “Sir, I have to warn you that I’m really good at fighting. With you trying to attack me, it’s
going to do nothing, but have you hurt yourself because I’m not going to fight you.”

Instead of responding, Y/N’s father launched at Negan again and Negan speedily raised his hand to
catch her father’s fist in his palm. Her mother was calling out to have Y/N’s father stop, but he was
fueled up ready to take on the world.

“I’m telling you; you aren’t going to land a hit on me when I’m fully alert sir,” Negan dropped his
grasp from her father and he shrugged his shoulders. That was one thing Negan was exceedingly
good at. Negan may not have been the biggest of guys, but he was one hell of a fighter and he was
strong. That was something that came with being a baseball player. He was fucking strong as hell.
Plus he had amazing reflexes. “It may make you angry, but nothing bad happened here. We’re both
consenting adults. Unlike you, I support any decision she makes in her life. I just want what’s best
for her.”

“You don’t know my daughter at all,” her father lodged himself at Negan again, but Negan
managed to sidestep and shoved her father aside.

“I think it’s the contrary. I actually know your daughter more than you do,” Negan explained,
giving her mother an apologetic look. Moving beyond Y/N’s father, Negan stepped before Y/N’s
mother and gave a somber expression. “I know this an awful way to find out about the two of us
and I apologize for that, but like you heard…I love your daughter. With all my heart and I
understand that there is some age difference between the two of us, but I think you can agree with
me when I say your daughter is very mature. Plus, she’s not a baby anymore. With me…”

Negan went to continue and he could see the worry in her mother’s eyes making him believe that
her father was about to attack him from behind. Lowering down, Negan grabbed her mother with
him and just in time watched her father trip over his own two feet in the hallway. In that moment
Negan managed to save both himself and Y/N’s mother from getting hurt by her father’s ignorance.

“Like I was saying, with me your daughter is going to be safe. I will always protect her. I will
always do whatever I can to keep her happy. I want nothing, but the best for her future. I’ll do
anything to give it to her,” Negan looked down at Y/N’s father that was grumbling incoherent
words to himself while he got up onto his knees. “I also heard that your husband smacked her last
night. I think we both know the things that he said to her were wrong. She’s not a slut for being in
love with me. With your husband telling her that she should have taken the abuse from her
professor? We both know that would have been the worst thing for her. It would have taught her
that anyone could take advantage of her. That it was okay for someone to abuse their power over
her. I also think that maybe you should reconsider your marriage as well. Not that I’m telling you
what to do, but you are your own woman. You see how he's attempting to attack me. He attacked
your daughter last night. I wouldn’t be surprised to know that he has done something similar to you
in the past.”

“You have no idea what it is like to be a father and watch your child throw her life away,” Y/N’s
father pulled himself from the floor, throwing his hand out to point at Y/N from where she stood
nervously across from him. “And for what? Someone like you?”

“You don’t know what it’s like to be a real father. When you have a daughter…when you have a
daughter, that little girl should be everything to you. The two of you should be best friends. You
should never lay a hand on her and you should do whatever it takes to keep her happy,” Negan’s
voice got rasp as he started to raise the volume of his voice. “Instead of continuing to be a drain on
your daughter’s life, you should step back and realize that maybe her life would be better without
you. From the moment that you held her, you should have seen that she was nothing, but
perfection. A part of you. A fucking miracle. Yet you wasted your whole life abusing her. Telling
her things that would always make her question her feelings. I know exactly what it takes to be a
father. But you sir, you don’t.”

Negan gave her father a final glare before turning his attention to her mother, “I’m sorry again that
this happened. Hopefully one day the three of us can have dinner together to talk about things. I
think you’re innocent in all of this and afraid. I don’t blame you for that. But your daughter is an
amazing, young woman that this going to do remarkable things with her future. I’ll be there to help
her when she needs it.”
Nodding his head, Negan back stepped and headed back for Y/N to hook his hand with hers,
“Come on sweetheart, we’re going.”

There was nothing Y/N could say that would top Negan with all he had just said. In fact, he blew
her away with everything that he lectured her father with. What he said was everything she thought
most people would want to hear from the person that their child was dating.

As they headed for the door, a grunt fell from Negan’s throat when a smacking sound filled the air.
Before Y/N could acknowledge what was happening, she saw Negan and her father scuffling
through the living room. Finally, Negan grabbed a hold of her father’s arm and wrenched it around
his back while Negan’s other hand placed over the back of her father’s neck. Negan had her father
in a position where he couldn’t move and was on his knees.

“Are you done?” Negan scoffed, keeping her father locked in place while he continued to try to
struggle. “I go to leave and you hit me in the back? Are you that much of a pussy? You’re just
trying to split your family apart, aren’t you?”

“Let me go,” her father demanded and Negan shook his head.

“Not until you say you are done,” Negan grunted, tugging his arm back just a bit further making
her father wince with the pressure that Negan was putting on his shoulder. “You should really stop
using force to try to hurt people. It was only a matter of time before you met someone who could
actually defend themselves.”

“I’m done,” her father finally submitted and Negan released him carefully, lowering him down to
the floor so Negan wouldn’t hurt him.

“Are you okay?” Y/N moved forward to reach for Negan to grab a hold of his hand to pull him to
her so that way she could look him over. Turning Negan, she looked at the place where her father
had hit him in the back and frowned. “I’m so sorry.”

“Negan, I’m sorry,” her mother moved in beside them and she looked absolutely embarrassed with
her husband’s actions. “Can I get you some ice or something?”

“I’m okay. I’ll be fine, thank you,” Negan assured her and Y/N wrapped her arm around Negan’s
waist to pull him in closer to her. “We’ll leave. I’ve already caused you enough trouble this
afternoon.”

“You go to him to ask him if he’s okay after what he just did to me?” Y/N’s father almost screamed
from where he was still on his knees. There were loud breaths falling from his throat and he was
stretching out his arm. “That’s it. I’m going to call the police and report him for assault. Also
breaking and entering.”

“Dad…” Y/N went to reason with her father as he stumbled to his feet and headed for the phone
that was in the corner of the room. When she went to move toward him, her mother held her hand
out and stopped her from moving.

“If you call them, I will let them know that I invited them here. I knew that she was dating Negan
and I wanted to get to know him,” her mother insisted, finally speaking up after everything that
happened. “I’ll also tell them how you attacked Negan and Negan just defended himself.”

“You know just as well as I do that you had no fucking clue that they would be here,” her father
snapped and her mother simply shrugged her shoulders. “You’re okay with our daughter dating
someone like…him?”
“Yeah, I am,” her mother simply looked over at the two of them. Her mother surveyed them over
for a long moment before shrugging. “I’ve heard what he has had to say about our daughter and I
believe every word that came from his mouth. Why wouldn’t I want our daughter to be with
someone who cares as much as he obviously does? You’d rather her get with some dipshit boy that
is going to hurt her because he can’t keep it in his pants? I won’t let you ruin what they have here.”

“He attacked me,” her father blurt out and Y/N placed her hand in over the center of Negan’s chest
to let him know that she would be okay as she stepped forward to look down at her father. “I swear
if you date him, I’m done with you. We’re over. You’re cut off completely.”

“Then I guess we’re over,” she took a long moment to think about what her dad had just thrown out
on the table. Sure, it made her sad, but this wasn’t how she was going to live her life. Being her
father’s puppet was not how things were going to be anymore. She had already done it long
enough. “It’s a shame that who I am dating…or that I am dating in general determines whether you
are proud of me or not. I guess if me being with someone that makes me happy doesn’t make you
love me, well then that’s just something I’m going to have to live with.”

There was a deafening silence that filled the home, but the gentle grasp of a hand in hers made her
let out a shuddering breath. Looking over her shoulder she could see that her mother had grabbed a
hold of her hand. It was the support of someone she had never expected to have, but she was
thankful for it.

“For so long, I listened to everything you said. I thought what you said was true. So I pushed away
friends. I never gave relationships a thought. I just focused solely on my work and being perfect.
I’m so screwed up because the idea of not being perfect terrifies me. I’m not even sure I’m capable
of loving someone fully because you have dug it into my head for so long how wrong falling in
love with someone would be for me and my future,” she explained how she was feeling while her
father stared up at her from where he was still on his knees in the middle of the living room. “I
don’t want to be your puppet anymore. I don’t want to be your emotionless robot that will just sit
there and take it like a good girl when someone is treating me like shit. I’m done. Having you out
of my life will probably be the best thing that has ever happened to me. Thank you for all you have
done to actually help me in my future, but I do think it’s for the best that this happens because I
don’t think I like the person you were leading me to be. At least with Negan, I can try to become
someone better.”

With that she turned on her heel, attempting to leave, but her mother managed to hug her and even
though Y/N’s heart was breaking at the thought of things, she knew that what was happening was
for the best, “I’ll be back when he isn’t here to get my things.”

“You’re wrong about something,” her father’s voice filled the air when she pulled away from her
mother. Looking over her shoulder, she could see her father stretching out his neck while fixing to
smooth down his clothing. “No matter what you try…no one can fix someone like you. You’re a
fuck up. You’ll always be a fuck up and you’ll always be someone that will fail. Negan may not
know it yet, but you’re a selfish little girl. You’ll never grow out of that and because of that, you’ll
never be happy.”

“Come on,” Negan reached for Y/N’s hand when he could see that her father saying that truly hit
her hard. Pulling her in closer to him, Negan gave her father a final look before moving toward the
door with her. There was an eagerness for him to get her to his home. When they did get there, she
immediately fell into his arms and he did his best to comfort her. “Hey, everything is going to be
okay. This is fucking typical of a narcissistic parent that has lost his grasp on someone he was
controlling for years. He’s wrong about you and I know it. You’re perfect in every way possible
and he’s just mad.”
“I know he was just being an asshole, but I am worried he’s right about me Negan,” she uttered out
loud and Negan urged her to look up at him while he stroked over the sides of her face with his
rough thumbs. “You do deserve someone better than me. I’m someone who is questionable about
love to begin with.”

“Do you love me?” Negan hushed her watching the way her bottom lip trembled when he spoke to
her. “Do you?”

“Yes,” she answered simply know that in her heart she knew that she did love Negan. There was
never a moment in her life where she ever felt about someone the way she did about Negan. “I just
don’t know if I will be able to love you as much as someone else could.”

“Just knowing that you love me is good enough for me,” Negan leaned forward to press a kiss over
her forehead before resting his chin against the top of her head. “That in itself is a huge step for the
two of us and I know how I feel about you. I love you and nothing is going to change that.”

After the day with her father, things seemed to progress rather fast for Negan and Y/N. When her
father wasn’t home, she went and grabbed her things just like she said she would do. There was a
fear she had for her mother being stuck at home alone with her father, but her mother insisted that
things would be okay. There were still interactions with her mother, but she had written her father
off completely just like she said she would do. It was strange not being able to go home anytime
she wanted to, but she knew everything was for the best.

Negan did what he could to make her feel at home when she had moved in fully with him. They
had been together all the time as it was to begin with. It shouldn’t have felt weird for her, but he
went above and beyond to make her feel comfortable. It was odd how fast they were able to fall
into living with each other. Negan was extremely supportive of her. Anything she needed; he was
sure to get her.

In the weeks that passed she had gotten to her meeting with the school board and because of the
lack of evidence toward her actually doing what she did to her professor’s car after the video went
missing, they had no other option than to allow her back to go to school next semester. It also
probably helped that another girl stepped forward with the same accusations that she had toward
her professor. Once people found out that two people spoke up, more girls came forward. It was
sad that it took a big deal for someone to actually believe that someone was abusing the power with
their job. There was more she wanted to do with the school for not believing her in the first place,
but at the end of the day the thing she really wanted was just to finish school so she could get into
the law school she wanted to get started on her dream career. It sucked that she would be a
semester behind, but life was strange in the way it worked.

Having that break led her to meeting Negan and without the break she may have never had this
incredible man in her life. Negan was everything she could ever ask for and more. He was doting,
loving, funny and just overall perfect. The last thing she ever wanted to imagine was a life where
Negan wasn’t in it. No one had supported her, pampered her or made her feel as special as he did. It
was nice to have someone in her corner as much as Negan was.

Today she had to go fill out some paperwork at school to put a few finishing touches on things.
Usually Negan would have gone with her, but instead he just let her go alone. It wasn’t that bad
because Negan had gotten her a new car since she was now officially living with him. Her old car
was her father’s purchase and when she split ways with her dad, it was an incredible gesture for
Negan to do. Especially since it was a really nice car.

Negan wasn’t really clear on why he didn’t go with her, but she just let it go because she knew that
Negan wouldn’t be able to make it to everything with her. By the time she made it home, the sun
was starting to set. It was late in the evening and she imagined that Negan was already inside
cooking dinner for them. Making her way up to the door, she opened the door to only watch both
Negan and Sam scramble to sit down on the couch. Negan hopped over the back of the couch and
landed on the seat with a big smile making her arch her eyebrow in curiosity.

“What were the two of you doing?” Y/N questioned, giving the both of them the side eye. Negan
was surprisingly dressed up really nice. He was wearing a pair of black slacks and a black button-
down shirt. Sam was also wearing a sundress which confused her. Having Sam over with them was
normal for them. That wasn’t the part that she was flustered by. It was the fact that the two people
she had grown to know very well over the last two months were both dressed up which wasn’t
often like them.

“We were just playing a game,” Sam explained with a breathless smile while Y/N moved forward
toward them.

“You were playing a game?” she reiterated and both of them looked at each other before turning
back to her with big smiles. When Negan nodded, she folded her arms out in front of her chest.
“What were you playing.”

“Hide and Seek,” Sam quickly muttered.

“Tag,” Negan answered at the same time and Sam gave Negan a confused expression. “Well, it
was a game of tag hide and seek. When you found the person hiding, you had to tag them or else
you were still it.”

“While wearing that?” Y/N looked between the both of them and Negan looked down at his
clothes, giving a quick shrug. “Should I be wearing something better? I feel dressed down
compared to the two of you.”

“How?” Sam chuckled from where she was seated. Her bright green eyes looked over Y/N from
where she was seated. “You look perfect. You obviously dressed up to go finish your paperwork at
the school. You don’t think that’s dressed up?”

“It’s a bit more casual compared to the two of you,” Y/N answered while Negan heard the sound of
a bell going off and he looked over his shoulder. “What is that?”

“That’s my sign that I have to transfer the food to the oven to finish what I was cooking,” Negan
pointed back toward the kitchen. Glancing between both Sam and Y/N, he took his time and pat his
knees. “You should go show Y/N what we have been doing with the backyard. I think she would
really like it.”

“I thought the two of you were playing a game?” Y/N reminded Negan of what he said while he
slowly pulled himself up from the couch. A big smile expanded over Negan’s features before he
gave her a wink. Before he left for the kitchen, he gave Y/N a quick kiss and it made her smirk.
When he left her alone with Sam, she gave Sam a certain glance that made Sam laugh. “So what
were the two of you really doing?”

“Playing hide and seek. Tag…hide and seek,” Sam replied with a wrinkle of her nose and a faint
laugh before waving her hand to get Y/N to follow her toward the backyard. “My mom dropped
me off right after you left and Negan thought it would be a good idea to change some things up. I
of course have a better design sense than he does, so I helped him.”

Following Sam out into the backyard, Y/N took notice of how quickly it got dark as the cool air
surrounded them. Once they stepped outside, the visuals made her let out an impressed breath. The
two of them had set up multiple string lights that lit up the backyard making it rather dreamy.
Negan had updated some of the backyard furniture as well as set up the bonfire for tonight.

“What made the two of you want to do this?” Y/N let curiosity get the best of her while she moved
toward the center of the grass area of the large backyard. They had even managed to get string
lights to cross the pool and she was impressed how fast they managed to work together. “I can’t
imagine why you would want to do something like this with your Saturday night.”

“Now hey! What is that supposed to mean? I’m not lazy,” Sam teased, playfully elbowing Y/N in
the side making her gasp. Y/N wrapped her arm around Sam’s shoulders and pulled her in close to
give her tight one-armed hug. “I like spending time with you and Negan. It’s fun. I never pictured
Negan having a girlfriend that I would like as much as I like you.”

“I think you are really cool too kiddo,” she nudged Sam with a smirk while moving over toward the
bonfire that Negan had already started. “This is a nice way to start the summer off. A nice dinner,
spending time with you two. I’ve got everything prepared for school…”

“So everything has been pretty perfect for you, right?” Sam confirmed, her big green eyes staring
up at Y/N with curiosity. “Like, this relationship has been pretty spectacular for you? You have
everything that could ever make you happy.”

“Yeah, it’s been really nice being with Negan,” Y/N agreed, thinking back on their time together. It
hadn’t been that long, but it felt like she had known Negan for years at this point. “I’m not sure
I’ve ever been this happy in my life kiddo. Getting to spend time with Negan and you have been
kind of the highlights for me.”

“Oh, you don’t have to say that,” Sam waved her hand in the air dismissively. “I know it’s really
just Negan for you, but I’m glad that you are involving me.”

“Hey now! Negan is great, but you are super cool and you know that! Don’t downplay how
awesome you are kiddo,” Y/N reached out to squeeze over Sam’s shoulder and she gave the young
girl a wink. “Your uncle told me that you were a badass and that you were really cool when we
first talked about you. He wasn’t wrong. You really are the coolest kid and I think spending time
with you has really opened me up to a side of myself that I never considered. I think because of you
I realize that I want kids one day. I have so much fun with you and I hope that if I do have children,
they turn out to be just like you.”

“Well dang,” Sam scoffed, her big green eyes staring up at Y/N with awe. Moving forward, she
wrapped her arms around Y/N’s waist to hug her tightly. “That was really nice. Thank you for
saying that.”

“Thank you for letting me be part of your life,” Y/N stroked her fingers over the back of Sam’s
head. In the past, the affection would have been something that would have made Y/N feel weird,
but she lived for moments like this. The idea of family was miserable for her in the past, but being
with Sam and Negan showed her it really wasn’t that bad. “I’m so thankful for you and Negan.
You both changed me in the best way possible.”

The sound of a tiny growl followed by a bark filled the air which made Y/N tense up when she
heard it. A tiny bell sound filled the air and she slowly released Sam from her arms to look behind
her to see that there was golden retriever puppy right behind her. It sat down before her, flopping
its ears while it shook its head.

“Oh…my…God…” Y/N’s words slurred together as she slowly lowered down to reach out to
brush her fingers over the puppy’s ear. The puppy let out a big yawn and it made Y/N smile.
Immediately she thought about how Sam had been begging Negan to get a puppy in the past. It
was now close to summer so it made sense that Sam had finally maybe gotten Negan to agree to
this puppy. “What’s your name little one?”

Noticing that it already had a collar, she reached down to pull the nametag up to see the name,
“Oliver…”

Her heart skipped a beat when she thought back on the conversation she had with Negan about
their hypothetical future when they were on the air balloon together. Letting out a shuddering
breath, she felt her eyes tearing over thinking about it. Noticing that there was a string hanging
down from his collar, she reached for it and followed the string. Lifting it up, she saw a note was
attached.

“Turn around,” she muttered, finally turning her head to see that Negan was knelt down before her
on one knee holding out a jewelry box. Gasping, she stood quickly and turned to face him. There
was a fairly large diamond ring inside while Negan looked up at her with big eyes. “Negan?”

Lifting her gaze, she could see that Sam was off in the corner watching the two of them, “What is
this?”

“This was a lot of work. I did everything I could to put this together today without you questioning
any of it,” Negan let out a hesitant laugh, his thick eyebrows bouncing up while he shifted
anxiously before her. Reaching out for her hand to hook his fingers with hers, Negan could feel her
trembling beneath his touch while he held the box in his other hand. I know that this is moving
fast. Everything has been moving so incredibly fast between us, but I know how my heart feels. I
know how I feel when I’m around you. I know on our first date with the air balloon I told you I
would ask you exactly a month after if things were still going well. It’s two months later to the
date, but I think…no, I know there is no one else I want to spend the rest of my life with. I think we
needed that extra month just to make sure how we felt was real and I know it is,” Negan explained,
his Adam’s apple bouncing inside of his throat while he stared up at her. The puppy started to
scratch at the side of Y/N’s leg because it desperately wanted attention and she reached down to
pick Oliver up in her free arm. It made Negan smile, but his bottom lip was trembling as he spoke.
“This whole thing scares me because I was afraid to love again. I didn’t want to open myself up to
someone and lose them like I lost Lucille, but I love you. I know how I feel and I know that when
I’m with you, everything in the world feels right. Being with you brought together all of my broken
pieces. I could be wrong, but I think you feel the same way about me too. When you know, you
know and I feel it in everything I am. I know I want to be with you. I fucking love you. So here I
am. Asking you to share your life with me. I promise now and forever I will always stand by your
side. I give everything to you. My heart. My love. Every part of me. I will never let you fall. I will
let you know every day how much I love you and how much I believe in you. I always be here for
you. From now until the day I die, my heart fucking belongs to you. I’m yours. I guess what I’m
asking is…I was wondering if you would do me the pleasure of being my wife?”

“You’re serious about all of this?” she felt the puppy licking at her face while the tears slid down
the side of her face. Negan nodded, his own eyes tearing over while he looked up at her. It took a
minute for her to think about things. Everything was making sense now. Yeah, maybe this was a
foolish choice, but if this was how she felt after only officially dating Negan two months, she could
only imagine how much better things could get. “Yeah. Yes.”

“Yes?” Negan repeated with a happy breath, his eyes staring up at her with awe. “Really?”

“Do you want me to change my mind?” she laughed and Negan hopped up from the ground to pick
her up in his arms. When he did it, it scared the puppy that was in her arms and Oliver barked. A
laugh fell from Negan’s throat when his lips collided with hers, eager to kiss her. The puppy
crawled in closer between the two of him as Negan carefully set her back to her feet.

“I’ve got the puppy,” Sam moved forward to grab Oliver while Negan reached for Y/N’s hand to
slide the ring up over her finger. “Don’t give him total credit for the ring by the way. I had a bit of
a say in it. We stood in that store for hours trying to figure out what the perfect ring was for you.
Instead of picking one of the regular ones, we had to make it unique and I helped him pick out
everything.”

“It’s beautiful sweetheart,” Y/N waved Sam in closer so she could hug both Negan and Sam in
unison. There was a fear that struck her because she had always thought that she wouldn’t get
married. That she wouldn’t have a family, but here she was. In her twenties, having exactly the
thing she never thought she would. “You both did a good job.”

“I’d like to say I came up with most of the design,” Negan boasted and Sam laughed upon hearing
him before nodding. “It’s nice to have this moment with my two beautiful girls.”

“She told me that when the two of you have kids, she wants them to be like me,” Sam informed
Negan, looking up at him with a bright smile while Oliver wiggled in her arms. “I guess you both
think I’m pretty special, huh?”

“I don’t think you ever have to ask that one Sam,” Y/N squeezed her in closer to the two of them
and she cherished the moment the three of them had together. In that moment, everything was
going right. Everything felt perfect. There was nothing more she wanted than to live in that small
little bubble of happiness with two of the people she cared for the most. Negan gave her everything
in her life that she could ever want for and more. “This was perfect you guys. Now we have our
little family full.”

“I’m just happy you said yes. He was terrified that you wouldn’t,” Sam teased, sneaking a look
back at Negan who dramatically rolled his eyes and let out a laugh. “So I know he’s relieved at
least.”

“To be fair, I never thought I would be married again, but being with you made me realize that I
want that life. I want to be able to belong to someone else. To have my heart completely in the
palm of someone’s hand,” Negan muttered, his eyes hooking with Y/N’s and he lowered down to
press a quick kiss over her lips. “So it was kind of a big deal here. And in a few minutes, we’re
going to top it off with your favorite dinner and dessert.”

“What if I would have said no?” she prodded at Negan, using her free hand to poke playfully at his
ribs and Negan laughed. “You still made my favorites?”

“Well, let’s just say I had hope that you would say yes,” Negan hooked his arm around her
shoulders to draw her to him so they could kiss. A groan of disgust filled the air and Negan
laughed against Y/N’s lips when Sam was clearly done with their compassion for each other.
Holding his hand out, he tried to cover Sam’s eyes while he continued to kiss Y/N. “She acts
disgusted, but one day there is going to be a guy or girl she loves as much as I love you. And she’ll
understand how silly it is when a kid acts like loving someone is gross.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Sam waved her hand in the air with a giggle when she finally pulled herself from
Negan and Y/N. “I’m twelve, so right now I’m just going to think you’re gross.”

“Deal,” Negan winked when Sam set Oliver on the ground to go play with him at the other corner
of the large backyard. “So you told her that you wanted to have children like her, huh?”
“Maybe. One day,” Y/N’s gaze connected with Negan’s. His heavy-lidded stare sent chills down
her spine while he dragged his thumb over her bottom lip. “If you’re half as good with our children
as you are with Sam, I’d say that I’d be the luckiest woman on the planet.”

“Mhmmm…” Negan hummed lowering enough to press another faint kiss over her lips. “And I am
the luckiest man with you in my arms. I promise, no matter what it takes…I will use everything in
my power to make you happy. I can’t fucking wait to share our future together.”
 Chapter 13
Chapter Summary

Everything seems to be going on the right path to Y/N's future with Negan, but when
someone Negan loves is hurt will the past come back to ruin their plans for a future?

Chapter Notes

It's almost 7 in the morning. So maybe this might be a little all over the place. I'm
hoping it's not. I promise I'm going to get back to writing my stories as often as I can.
Sending anyone that still reads this all of my love!

“Mmmm…you know what my favorite thing about going to one of your games is?” Y/N hummed
while she kissed Negan who was gradually backstepping toward the front door of their home.
Keeping ahold of the sides of his face, she continued to kiss him hearing his satisfied hum while
she nibbled at his bottom lip. The last few hours she had just sat and watched one of Negan’s final
games of the year. Sitting there watching him coaching had gotten her hot knowing that this man
that all the mom’s in the crowd were fawning over belonged to her. There was an aggressive,
competitive side that came out to Negan when he was coaching his teams and it was something
that she loved to see.

“What’s that?” Negan growled, his tongue flicked out over hers after she tugged at his lip gently
with her teeth. Dropping the bag that was hanging over the side of his shoulder, he tried to reach
inside of his pockets to look for the keys to the house. Grabbing his wrists, she pulled them out and
shoved him against the side of the brick wall of the home. “Baby, we need to get inside.”

“We will. In due time,” she pushed him toward the corner of the porch where the bushes would
hide them from the neighbors. Kissing over the side of Negan’s neck drew him to drop his head
back and let out a sharp exhale. “I love getting to watch you coach. Those kids fucking love you.
You really go all out when you do it. Most of all, I love you in this outfit. Looking professional…”

“You know, if you’re going to be my wife…you’re going to have to stop sexualizing me at all of
my games,” Negan’s wicked smirk expanded over his handsome features, drawing emphasis to his
dimples. A sharp breath fell from his throat when she pulled at the bottom of his shirt that was
tucked into the front of the pants he was wearing for his uniform. When his lower abdomen was
exposed to her sight, she licked her lips and let out a pleased exhale. “What?”

“It’s just nice knowing that all of this…,” she lowered her palms to trace her fingertips over
Negan’s slender abdomen to draw her fingers through the dark hair that covered his flesh. The
touch alone made Negan’s abdomen sink in because he was so affected by her touch. A groan fell
from his throat that was followed by another amused smirk, “belongs to me.”

“It’s all yours,” Negan confirmed with her, winking at her when she tipped up on her toes to meet
him in another open-mouthed kiss. Each flick of Negan’s tongue against hers had chills running up
and down her spine. A fire was burning deep within her and she found herself enthusiastically
tugging at Negan’s belt in his pants. “We’re still outside.”

“I don’t care,” she contended with a firm nod of her head. The idea of it was thrilling to her. It
made Negan’s wolfish smile grow when she wasted no time in getting the material apart. When she
started pulling apart his pants, Negan leaned comfortably back against the brick of the house,
pushing his hips out further for her to have an easier time getting him how she wanted him. “I’m
certain this isn’t the first time you’ve done something out in public with someone. The bushes are
blocking most of it anyway.”

“You’re so bold now,” Negan grunted when she tugged at the material of his pants to get them
down toward his thighs leaving him standing before her in his black boxer briefs that clung tightly
to his body. “With your parents right across the street…”

“Do me a favor,” she lowered down to her knees before reaching up to palm in over Negan’s
hardening body through the thin cotton material that was covering it. It made Negan’s eyes roll
back, his tongue dragging out over his bottom lip before he bit seductively at his bottom lip. “If
you see my parents, be sure to wave to them while I’m doing it. Okay?”

“Naughty girl,” a raspy moan rumbled deep down from Negan’s chest when she tipped up just
enough to press kisses over the length of Negan’s erection that was beneath the material of his
boxer briefs. Lowering his hand, he sank his fingers into her hair enjoying the sensation of her
teasing him. Keeping his head tipped back enhanced everything, but each movement of her mouth
was unexpected. When her hungry kisses rose up to the waistband of the material keeping him
covered, it made him lower his chin to stare down at her. There she was drawing lines with her
tongue over the skin beneath his navel, leaving tiny nibbles over his flesh driving him absolutely
wild with desire. “You’re being a tease.”

“Maybe,” amusement flooded into her features when she hooked her fingertips teasingly
underneath the material causing Negan’s breathing to become more uneven. “You’re mine. You
know that, right?”

Tugging down on the material just enough allowed Negan’s cock to spring forward before her.
When the air surrounded him, the muscles in his thighs flexed and a faint whine escaped his throat.
Wrapping her fingers around the base of his cock drew his hips in closer to her showing how
desperate he was to have her touching him. Dragging her fingers down the length of his shaft, she
made sure that her touch was faint making Negan’s body a tremoring mess. Focusing on each vein
and every ridge of his body, had Negan’s fists balled up tightly beside him, “Say it.”

“Say what?” Negan panted, his eyes closing tightly when she flicked small lines at the tip of his
cock with her tongue. Wet kisses followed making him push his hips in closer to her, but she pulled
her mouth away with a wet sound.

“That you’re mine,” she ordered with a bit of fire to her tone. Lowering his head, Negan could see
that her eyes were locked on his waiting for what she wanted. Tipping his head to the side, Negan’s
eyes narrowed. A mischievous grin tugged at his lips while he took in the sight of her fingers
wrapped around the most intimate part of him. The warmth of her breath etched over the head of
his cock with her lips just hovering just faintly over the tip. “Say it.”

“What are you willing to give if I say it?” Negan’s eyebrows bounced, playing further into the
whole situation. Her eyes were dilated with want and need to hear him say it. A moan fell from his
throat when she pressed her tongue out to flatten it out over the slit at the tip of his cock collecting
the taste of him. “Baby…”

“Say it,” she instructed once more, pulling her hand up his length before pushing back down in an
agonizingly slow pace drawing Negan to wince. Repeating the motion had him attempting to thrust
his hips forward toward her for more friction, but she wouldn’t allow it. “I will give you a hell of a
blowjob if you give me what I want.”

“You know I’m yours,” Negan finally submitted and said that she wanted. Lowering his fingertips
to swipe his thumb in over her plump bottom lip that was already slick made her purr. “I belong to
you. Forever and always.”

“Good boy,” she hummed while moving before him in a way that made it easier for her to pleasure
him without hurting her knees. Pumping her hand over his manhood several times had Negan’s
chest rising and falling. Knowing that it was this easy to turn him into such a mess made her proud.
Negan was wrapped around her fingers and she loved it. Circling the tip of his erection with her
wet tongue, she started flicking at the sensitive flesh with long, languid strokes. Each flick caused
winces to fall from Negan’s throat while she used him like he was her own personal lollipop.
Pulling back, she licked her wet lips and knew that right now she could have gotten Negan to do or
say absolutely anything for her. Continuing to press wet kisses at the underside where the tip of his
cock met the shaft left him breathless before her. When the warmth of her wet mouth finally
enveloped his body, it made him reach out to slide his palms in over the side of her neck and up
toward her hair to grasp firmly to it. With each movement of her tongue, she had Negan getting
more expressive and throbbing with her dedication to this. Pulling her mouth away made Negan
whine. He looked down at her, his mouth agape while she teased her fingers at the tip of his cock
making it twitch with how hard he was. “Beg for me. I want to hear it.”

“Please…” Negan didn’t hesitate in giving her what she wanted making her draw her tongue out to
trace a line with her wet tongue from tip to base before repeating the movements. Sliding his right
hand down, he curled his fingers underneath her chin to urge her to lift her gaze to him. “Take me
into your mouth. Please.”

“Yes sir,” she hummed against the underside of his cock making him moan out with the vibration
of it. Parting her lips, she allowed Negan to lead his solid erection between her wet lips. Bobbing
her head over his body, she did what she had learned he liked in their short time together. Working
with her tongue, hands and lips she had Negan on the brink of desperation when she would slow
down her movements. The effort she was putting in had him shaking and twitching before her, but
she wasn’t going to allow him to cum. Leaning back on her knees, she caressed her palm loosely
over Negan’s length. “The sounds you make are so fucking hot.”

“It’s all because of you baby,” Negan assured her with a faint smile while she worked her hand
over his slick body that was coated in her saliva. There was pride in her eyes while she kissed over
the swollen tip, teasing him in ways that she only could. When she took him back into her mouth,
she slid him back as far into her throat as she could making his eyebrows crease and his rasp moan
filled the air. “Fucking hell…fuck…”

Over and over again she repeated the movement which led his hips to involuntarily bounce up
toward her with the want to have a release. When it seemed like he was about to reach that place
she pulled her mouth away with a wet pop. Her wet lips glistened while his chest rose and fell.

“Get up here,” Negan reached out to pull her up toward him, tugging her forward to fall in against
his chest. Within seconds, his mouth was covering hers kissing her with a fiery passion. With each
flick of his tongue he could taste himself against her lips. Tugging at the material of her pants, he
managed to get them down far enough along with her panties making her gasp. Grasping between
the two of them, Negan kept a firm hold of his erection, bringing them close enough together to run
the swollen tip through her sensitive folds making her head fall in against the side of his neck. “Is
this what it’s always going to be like with us?”
“I can’t imagine not…” she gasped when the tip of his cock had just enough pressure against her
clitoris to draw her to fall against him. “I can’t imagine a world where I don’t find you
completely…irresistible.”

With that, she met his eyes again and dragged her tongue over his lips. Continuing to tease his rigid
erection between her damp heat had her melting in the palm of his hand grasping tightly to him.
Biting at his bottom lip caused him to growl leaving a chill to spread throughout her entire body.
Negan slid down just enough to be able to line the head of his cock with her willing entrance. A cry
fell from her throat when Negan thrust upward to sink into her. It made her whimper and drop her
head forward to rest it against the inside of his shoulder.

Rocking his hips up a few times made him moan out against her temple with how forcefully her
body was clinging around his. In this position he felt entirely too big with the way he filled her. She
didn’t know how long she would be able to stay in this position with the way that her legs were
shaking already with just the small amount they had already done.

“Negan,” she cried out his name, nearly panting when his thumb circled in over her clitoris to
match the tempo his hips started. Biting at the material of his shirt, she tried to keep the sounds she
was making to a low volume since they were still outside. The friction from this position was
incredible, but still so hard to keep up on steady legs since it felt so good. “Fuck…”

“Here,” Negan dropped his hands to grab a tight hold of her hips to help rock her hips toward his
and she lowered her palms to his hips where her fingers traced over the v-line of his perfect body.
“Tell me when you want me to stop.”

“Don’t…” she demanded, lowering her gaze to watch his impressive length thrusting inside of her
time and time again. The pull of his body from hers would graze against her clitoris before he
pumped back forward drawing her to rock her hips against his movement. “Negan, your big cock
feels so good.”

“You enjoy this way too much,” Negan chuckled in almost a naughty manner while her fingers
dug into his flesh. Watching her head tip back, Negan could tell by the way that her body was
shaking that she was so close to having an orgasm. Taking advantage of the moment, he rocked her
over his body until she fell forward into his chest burying her face into the center of it. With her
walls contracting around his swollen length, he knew that he had gotten her to her first orgasm. An
amused snicker rumbled from his throat with her hands bracing herself over his abdomen while she
shook over him. “Good girl…”

“We need to get inside,” she panted, pulling her hips from his letting out an uneven breath when
his manhood pulled from her body. Negan moved back toward the house and pulled his shirt from
his body to toss it aside when they entered the home. Reaching for him, she kissed him over and
over while he attempted to get his pants down his legs after kicking off his shoes.

“Bedroom,” he breathed out against her lips only to stumble back over his own two feet which had
him landing on the floor of the hallway behind him. After shutting the door, Y/N was quickly
pulling off her bottoms before lowering in over Negan’s body reaching between them to lead him
back inside of her. Dropping his head back, Negan hummed when she took no time in bouncing
herself over his length. “Couldn’t make it to the bedroom?”

“I needed to have you right now,” she vowed with an approving nod of her head, bracing her
weight with her palms over the center of Negan’s naked chest. The roughness of Negan’s fingers
pushed up underneath her t-shirt to caress over the skin making her purr out in delight with the way
he was touching her.
“I love you,” Negan grunted, his eyes noticing the way that her engagement ring glistened when
the light hit it just right. Licking over his lips, he tugged at the material of her shirt and haphazardly
got it from her body. Sitting up just enough, he tugged at the cup of her bra to reveal her breast to
him. Lapping at the nipple with his tongue, he groaned out with how enthusiastically she was
rocking her hips over him. Sucking at her flesh had her fingers sinking into his hair while she cried
out with the way their bodies were moving together. This was messy, but there was a yearning that
both of them had in being with each other. “Fuck me.”

“That was kind of the idea,” she laughed when he pulled his mouth back, a wet slurping sound
filling the air after he worked the nipple into a small bud with his talented mouth.

“You love being in control,” Negan huffed, dropping his head down to watch the way her hips
bounced over his thick cock, “don’t you?”

“You just feel so good,” she purred meeting his mouth in another wet, passionate kiss where both
of them tried to take lead over the other. Being with Negan was tantalizing in every sense of the
word. Everything felt right, like she was on top of the world when he was inside of her. Allowing
her hips to sink down over his length to fill her completely had Negan’s deep, raspy moan filling
the air. Pushing her hand into the center of his chest had him falling back against the floor while
she kept his whole body inside of her and rolled her hips in circular motions over him. “You love
this too. You know that you do.”

“You’re like a drug baby,” Negan retorted, licking over his lips while he desperately reached for
her hips to have some kind of control over what was happening. Rolling her over onto her back had
her whimpering out. “You’re everything I’ve wanted and more.”

“Negan,” she gasped out when he shifted enough to bring her close enough to his chest so he could
pick her up in his arms while moving to the bedroom to drop her down on top of the bed. Her legs
were hanging over the bed before Negan hooked his arms underneath her knees to brace them.
“You’re something else.”

“Mhmm, but I’m yours darlin’,” Negan winked rolling his hips forward again and again drawing
her cries to fill the air.

They both struggled for dominance in their sex session until they both reached their highs with one
another, leaving her clinging to Negan with her arms wrapped snuggly around his shoulders. His
head was buried against the side of her neck while he tried to catch his breath. Sliding her fingers
up the center of his back, over the length of his neck and into his wet hair caused a hum of
approval to fall from his throat while she touched him.

“You’re going to be the death of me,” Negan professed in her ear, nipping at her earlobe making
her smile when he said that. “My heart is pounding. I feel fucking high off of you. I can’t enough.”

“Good,” she responded with Negan pulling his head back to stare down at her with his beautiful
hazel eyes. “Well, not the part about you dying, but I’m glad you can’t get enough of me. That
means you don’t regret asking me to marry you. You’re not bored with me.”

“I’ll never get bored of you,” Negan reached for her hand to lead it over the center of his chest so
she could feel for herself the vibrations inside of his chest from his heart. When she placed her
hand over his chest, he flashed her that cocky smile that drew her whole body to shake just seeing
it. “This here. Everything belongs to you.”

“It better,” she lifted up enough to meet his mouth in another welcoming kiss built up with all the
power and passion that she could muster. When Negan carefully moved from over her to roll onto
his back in bed beside her, she felt her body still twitching from what he had been able to work her
up to. “I feel like you make it a game to see if you can make me cum more each time we have sex.”

“Only when we have the hot sweaty kind of sex where we are both acting wild and reckless,”
Negan laughed as she turned onto her side to watch the way his torso moved with the heavy
breathing that he was doing. It drew her attention to all the lines of his body and she reached out to
trace her fingers over his abdomen enjoying the sight of the wet, dark hair over his body. “When
we make love, all I care about is that connection between the two of us. That’s incredible. But
when we’re doing this kind of stuff, you want to be in control so bad that I do everything I can to
show you just how much your body loves…”

“Your cock,” she interrupted him making him let out a hearty laugh as he tipped his head to the
side to stare out at her. “I’m going to have some trouble walking for a while.”

“Did I hurt you?” Negan swallowed down hard, his eyebrows furrowing when she said that.

“No, I’m still shaking. That last one made me think I blacked out for a few seconds,” she informed
him seeing his dimples sinking in from her confession. “We’re probably going to have to change
the sheets. Unless of course you want to sleep in your mess…”

“Our mess,” Negan rolled onto his side to flatten his hand over the center of her chest to trace lines
leading down toward her lower abdomen before palming between her thighs. Pushing his fingers
inside of her made her head tip back into the pillows. Her lips parted, her tongue dragging out over
her bottom lip. The thrusts of his fingers into her already sensitive body caused her to gasp faintly
while he did it. Pulling his fingers out, he could see that they were coated in the remainder of their
steamy sex session. “To me, it’s a sign of a job well done.”

“You definitely know what you’re doing,” she stated, reaching for his wrist to pull his hand in
closer to her. Lifting her head up, she wrapped her lips around his fingers to suck at the length of
them. Collecting the taste from them made Negan exhale loudly. “You’re talented with what God
gave you.”

“You think so?” Negan smirked leaning forward to claim her lips with his again to taste himself
against her mouth. “I think I need a shower baby. I’m a mess…”

Looking down at his body showed him how his body was covered in a thin layer of sweat. With
how Negan prided himself on his appearance, she recognized that he wouldn’t want to stink. Even
though they should have went straight to eating since they had only had breakfast, she knew he
would want to clean himself off first, “How about you join me?”

“You know if I join you, things are just going to get heated again,” she pointed out seeing him
wiggle his eyebrow in response. This was something they could probably find themselves lost in
for hours, but real life had to come first. Dropping her head back against the bed, she released an
exhausted exhale from her lungs knowing that they had really gone pretty hot and heavy with one
another. Rolling her head to the side, she watched Negan pull himself to the edge of the bed and
stretch out his back when he did it. When Negan stood and moved around the bedroom to collect
the clothes he would wear after their shower, she cleared her throat and smiled. “I love your ass.”

“I love your ass,” Negan repeated with a wink, looking back over his shoulder at her. Negan
noticed that she was staring out at him with awe in her eyes. After a minute, she pulled herself to
the edge of the bed to tip her head to the side to admire the view. “It’s a small ass. I don’t have
much of an ass.”

“I think it’s perfect,” she watched him turn to face her and it made a harsh breath catch in her
throat. Negan’s body was still damp with their love making and it drew attention to all the right
areas. “I’ve been thinking about something. We should get a tattoo together.”

“I’m down for that,” Negan shrugged his shoulders looking over his arms to gaze at the art that he
already had over his body. “Heaven knows there is plenty of space for it.”

“That wasn’t hard to get you to agree to it,” she pointed out, going to pull herself up from the edge
the bed, but quickly lowered herself back down when she felt the room spinning around her.

“You okay?” Negan asked watching her nod, but he still moved over to the side of the bed to lower
down in front of her to check. “You sure?”

“Yeah, I’m sure I just overdid it. We kind of went a little wild,” she waved her hand in the air
dismissively knowing that it wasn’t a big deal. Stuff like that used to happen all the time in the past
when she would stand up too fast. It wasn’t a big deal. It just would take a minute for her to gather
herself and everything would be okay. “I think maybe I need to eat. You get your shower in, I’ll
make something for dinner.”

“You sure?” Negan pulled her in against his chest when she went to get up, hearing her let out a
happy sound when his thumb slid in over the side of her neck. Urging her in to kiss him, Negan
growled against her lips and cleared his throat. “You still have my cum inside of you…”

“I like it there,” she nipped at his bottom lip hearing his shuddering breath that followed. “I’ll take
a shower after dinner. I just probably need to get some food in me. No big deal.”

The sound of a tiny bark made a smile press in over her lips when she thought about their puppy
that was in the next room, “He heard us. Even more reason for me to go let him out. I’ll have
Oliver with me so I’ll be safe.”

“You sure?” Negan confirmed, looking back at the bathroom. “I can hold off on the shower and
help you.”

“I can handle dinner and a puppy Negan,” she assured him moving away from him, but managing
to smack his ass on the way to her stuff making him gasp before laughing. “Now get your sexy ass
clean for me.”

“Yes ma’am,” Negan headed into the bathroom leaving her to herself to push through her clothes to
find something to wear.

When the shower turned on, she looked over her shoulder. Considering Negan’s original offer, she
thought about joining him instead knowing that she did like their time together that was spent in the
shower. Hell, who was she kidding? She enjoyed any time that they spent together. She was going
to be marrying him though, so maybe it was better for her just to be making dinner for them
instead. Plus, with a brand new puppy in the house, she knew it was better to tend to the puppy
before he may have had an accident. Oliver was turning out to be a great dog. He was very relaxed
and perfect for their family. He was everyone’s shadow and just loved to be loved.

Reaching for Negan’s black, button down shirt she buttoned just a few of the buttons together
before heading out into the hallway for the door that Oliver was behind. Opening it up, she
couldn’t help but a feel a rush of cheerfulness looking out at the puppy sitting on his bed staring
out at her with his big eyes. Holding onto the doorknob, she saw the excitement that filled Oliver’s
face when he saw her.

“Hey there handsome,” she lowered down to her knees seeing his ears bounce when he tipped his
head to the side. When they had come up with their silly little story about getting a golden retriever
together, she never thought that Negan would actually take it seriously. Yet, she was glad that he
did. Oliver added something she didn’t know she needed in her life and that was a good distraction.
“Where is my hug?”

An excited bark filled the air as Oliver took a running start at her when she held her hands out to
him. The puppy jumped into her arms and she knew that it may not be a good thing to teach him
since he would get a lot bigger one day, but she loved it too damn much. Oliver’s kisses covered
her face when she stood up and carried him with her toward Negan’s kitchen.

“We’re going to let you outside and then we’re going to make some dinner,” she explained to the
puppy while caressing her fingers through his soft fur, scratching at the back of his ears while they
headed for the back door. Setting Oliver down on the deck, she watched him run off while taking
the steps very carefully. Standing at the edge of the deck watching Oliver run around the backyard
in playful bounces made her smile. Having a dog never was really something she pictured, but
Oliver was adorable and brought her so much joy. When Oliver was done with his business, she
whistled to get his attention. A giggle fell from her throat when Oliver threw his head back to look
at her. His oversized ears flopping with the movement. “Come on inside handsome. We’ll get you
a biscuit and some dinner.”

Hearing the word biscuit had Oliver running back to the house. His run right now was more of a
bounce, but it definitely added to his personality. There was a struggle when he reached the steps,
but he managed to make his way up the deck into the house with an excited wag of his tail. At this
point Oliver knew all the tricks. Upon closing the backdoor Y/N saw that Oliver was already
sitting beside the counter where the dog biscuits were in the cookie jar. Tipping his head back,
Oliver watched her every movement. Each breath he gave got more excited when she reached for a
biscuit for him. Oliver’s paws wiggled in front of him with eagerness when she kneeled down in
closer to him.

“Paw,” she instructed with a bright smile when Oliver gave her his paw. “Good boy. Now beg.”

After each order Oliver did as instructed until she gave him the biscuit that he was so desperate for.
If there was one thing Negan was good at, it was training dogs. Even with Oliver being so young,
Negan already had a good, obedient puppy on his hands.

“Let’s get you some dinner,” she gave Oliver a final pet before gathering his bowl to fill it with
food. Setting it down had Oliver excitedly burying his head into his bowl to get a start on scoffing
down his meal.

Gathering a few things, she figured she would just cook them a simple dinner, but the sound of
something caught her attention from where she was at in the kitchen. It was the sound of Negan’s
phone buzzing on the floor from where he had kicked his pants off in the hallway when they
entered the home. Letting it go, she knew that Negan would be back to see what it was when he
was ready.

While she was getting some water ready to make some pasta, she reached for the pack of cheese
puffs that Negan kept for Sam when she visited. Stealing a few, she snacked on them knowing that
it was best to probably get some food in her with how she was feeling earlier.

“Persistent,” she muttered to herself when the sound of Negan’s phone going off again was heard.
Still leaving the phone, she continued with making a vodka sauce to go with the pasta. It wasn’t
glamorous like Negan’s food often was, but she was just hoping maybe the two of them could
come up with a better dessert together. By the fourth of fifth time that Negan’s phone went off,
Y/N found curiosity getting the best of her. Heading over toward the hallway she saw that Oliver
was sitting beside Negan’s pants, his head tipped to the side not understanding why the pile of
clothes was making the noise that it was. It made her smirk when she reached down to dig into the
pockets to try to find his phone. Noticing every missed call was Elaina made Y/N let out a worried
sound wondering if it was something she needed to let Negan know. Before she could even decide
what to do, Elaina was calling again so instead of holding it off Y/N decided to answer the phone.
“Hello?”

“Thank God you fucking answered,” Elaina seemed panicked on the other end of the phone
making Y/N’s heart hammer upon hearing that. When someone began with a statement like that,
something was definitely wrong. “Is Negan there? I have to talk to him. Really bad. Something
happened.”

“Yeah, sure…” Y/N quickly moved through the hallway of Negan’s home toward his bedroom.
Entering the bathroom she still heard Negan singing something to himself while he was finishing
up in the shower. Quickly pulling open the door of the shower, she could see Negan turn around to
look at her with big eyes.

“Hey there beautiful. You change your mind and decide to join me,” Negan flashed a giant smile in
hopes of tempting her into something more, but instead was met with the nervous expression that
was over Y/N’s face. “What is it?”

“It’s Elaina. Your phone went off like six or seven times so I figured I would look and she said
something is wrong,” you held up the phone which had Negan reaching for the phone immediately
to pull it to his ear after he stepped out from underneath the spray of the water. Negan walked out
of the shower after turning it off, stepping out onto the carpet in front of the shower.

“Hey. Yeah, I was in the shower. I’m sorry,” Negan apologized, slicking his wet hair back while
he reached with his free hand for the towel that was sitting on the bathroom counter. Noticing that
he was having trouble with it, she grabbed a hold of it to hand him while he wiped off his wet
body. Elaina must have said something pretty bad because the color drained from Negan’s face the
longer that he listened to her. “What do you mean? How? I don’t understand.”

Wanting to say something, she knew that she just needed to stay quiet while Negan moved over
toward where he set his clean clothes. Negan pulled on his briefs, doing his best not to fall over
before he hastily reached for his black athletic pants to pull them on.

“Where are you at?” Negan demanded an answer while grabbing his shirt and heading for the
bedroom where Y/N followed him close behind. This was bad. She hadn’t seen Negan like this
before. Whatever was going on was serious. “I’ll be there as soon as possible.”

When Negan tossed his cell phone onto the bed and pulled his shirt on in a hurry, she could tell that
something was extremely wrong, “Negan?”

“Sam was in an accident. She lost a lot of blood and she has a rare blood type. The hospital is low
on supplies so I have to go to the hospital and donate the blood because I have the same blood
type,” Negan seemed to be in a panic, his face twisted with mixed emotions while she nodded and
headed over to grab a hold of a pair of jeans to pull on. Negan was digging through the drawer in
attempts to find his keys and she saw him shaking while he pushed through things. “Goddammit!”

“Hey,” she moved in beside Negan, grabbing a hold of his face to get him to look at her seeing that
there was fear flooding through his eyes. “The keys are in your pants in the hallway. I’ll get them
and I’ll drive you there.”

“You don’t have to do that. I have to get there fast and…” Negan stammered expressing just how
scared he actually was. Reaching out, she grabbed a hold of the material of his shirt so she could
pull him closer to her. Depositing a kiss over his lips, she attempted to get him to calm down
knowing that Sam was extremely important to Negan so this was something she needed to be there
for him with.

“You’re frantic right now. We need you to focus, think about Sam and I’ll drive us there so you
don’t get hurt. Okay? Nothing good is going to come from you getting hurt on the way to the
hospital. I’ll make sure to get you there in one piece. You can call Elaina back and talk to her about
things while I drive,” she reached for his hand to get him to follow her after he grabbed his phone.
Quickly turning off the things in the kitchen, she made sure everything was safe and turned off.
Negan gathered Oliver to put him in the room they would keep him in when they were gone. Once
everything was settled, they were quickly headed to the car and were on their way to the hospital.

Listening to Negan and Elaina talk had her trying to pull together the story of what was happening
on the way to the hospital. She was only getting one half of what was going on by Negan’s
responses to Elaina. Elaina was nothing but a hum on the other end of the phone that Y/N couldn’t
quite make out in terms of words.

When they reached the hospital, they took Negan back immediately to donate the blood for the
blood transfusion that Sam was going to need. It was like Negan was in another world while they
prepped him for the donation. His eyes were staring blanky out in the distance. There were so
many things that Y/N wanted to say to try to comfort him, but she didn’t want to upset him or
stress him out while he was doing the blood donation. So she just stayed beside the bed that they
had him sitting stretched out on. Her fingers were hooked with Negan’s knowing that he was
terrified of what was going to happen to Sam because he wasn’t even completely sure of what was
going on. They were alone for a while in silence. During that time, she just stroked her thumb over
the back of his hand trying to let him know that she was there if he needed her for anything.

It was like that until the sound of the door being pushed open was heard when someone walked
into the room. Lifting her head, Y/N saw that it was Elaina. She was still in her scrubs, her green
eyes were red from visibly crying prior to this. Negan tensed up, sitting up straighter when she
entered the room. There was a muscle at the corner of his jaw that flexed, “How is she?”

“They have her stable,” Elaina explained with a small nod of her head, reaching up to nervously
push back her blonde hair behind her ears. “They say if they get her the blood transfusion that
everything should be okay. They already had the surgery to reset her arm.”

“I don’t understand how this happened,” Negan shook his head, his fingers squeezing harder
around Y/N’s while she held onto his hand. “We tell Sam non-stop to fucking watch where she is
going while on that skateboard. She knows not to go in the street with that thing unless someone is
with her.”

“Well, Jane was with her…” Elaina stammered, her eyes wandering off making Negan sit up
straighter upon hearing that. “Jane got a call from work. It was important so she had to go into her
office to go get something…”

“She what?” Negan snapped, his head tipping to the side while his chest began to raise and fall
heavily. “How long was she gone?”

“Negan,” Y/N muttered his name knowing that expression. Negan was getting angry and the last
thing he needed to do was get angry while he was donating blood with Sam in the hospital.

“No, I need to hear this. How long was she in the office? How long was she inside of the house
before she discovered that Sam was hurt?” Negan scowled, the prominent vein at the side of his
neck protruding while he spoke.

“I don’t know Negan. It was a mistake,” Elaina offered up trying to explain things to him while
they stood in the room together. Elaina was overwhelmed with everything. That was evident. With
the fact that she was still wearing her scrubs, Y/N assumed that she was still working when the
accident happened. Which means she probably didn’t know the full situation at hand. She was just
telling Negan what she knew. “I got the call and they brought her here. They won’t let me work on
her because of obvious reasons. Jane said that they were outside together playing and she went into
the office. She said she heard a loud sound and she just assumed it was nothing. You’ve been to our
house. You hear the way that people drive. We have teenagers on the street.”

The nurse came into the room to collect the blood that Negan had donated and Y/N felt her face
flushing over with warmth over the whole situation. She felt like she was there in the middle of
something that she shouldn’t have been.

“Regardless. Sam was out there and she should have been watching Sam! If she wasn’t going to be
there, she should have had Sam come in with her,” Negan maintained with an angry shake of his
head. The nurse worked on collecting everything from Negan who showed no signs in calming
down. “Who knows what is going on with Sam now that I’m sitting in here doing this instead of
being with her. This shouldn’t even be happening right now.”

“I told you. She was hit by the car. The person ran. She has a concussion and had a compound
fracture of her arm. Because of that she bled a lot,” Elaina explained, her face extremely pale while
she moved in closer to bed that Negan was on. “As soon as Jane found her, she got her help and
they brought her here immediately. They took her into surgery…”

“Do they have anything on the person that did this to her?” Negan begged for details, attempting to
pull himself up in the bed, but let out a winded breath when he did it. Immediately, Y/N stood up
and reached out to urge him back into a resting position. “I’m okay. It’s alright.”

“They are going to get you a snack and some juice to help you,” Y/N informed him, stroking her
fingers over the side of Negan’s face to get him to look at her. “You just donated blood Negan. I
understand you being upset, but you’re not going to be ready to face the world right now. I donated
blood not long ago and it kind of kicks your ass. You need to be calm.”

“I can’t,” Negan frowned, leaning into her touch while she caressed her palm through the rough
stubble that covered his jaw. “Not when someone hurt Sam. Sam is…everything to me. If
something happens to her…if something happens to that little girl…”

“That’s not going to happen because you heard Elaina, right? You donated the blood and
everything is going to be okay,” Y/N attempted to calm him knowing that it wouldn’t help in this
moment if he got overly worked up. The last thing they needed was Negan fainting or passing out
from getting too worked up. “I had a friend that had a compound fracture. They have this metal rod
that was in there to help them heal the bone with some pins. It took a while for it to heal, but he’s
okay.”

“Sam is a baby,” Negan’s bottom lip trembled, his hazel eyes tearing over while he stared up at
Y/N with fear in his face. “She’s twelve. Someone is out there and they hurt her. Who hits a child
and just leaves them in the middle of the street bleeding?”

“A monster,” Y/N shrugged her shoulders knowing that there was no excuse for that kind of
person. It may have been a genuine mistake, but once the person ran off, it became a serious deal.
“I don’t know what kind of person could do something like that Negan. It’s awful.”
“The police said that they would do everything they could to find them,” Elaina spoke up from the
other side of Negan. When he heard that, his body tensed up and obviously he wasn’t one to
believe that it was true.

“Even if they do find this person, it doesn’t take back the fact that they hurt her,” Negan reminded
them, his words coming out in a slur when he turned his attention back to Sam. “With these kinds
of things, you could have an infection, you can get a pulmonary embolism from the…”

“Negan, let’s not jump ahead of ourselves,” Elaina reasoned with Negan hearing the pain and
agony in Negan’s voice while he spoke. “She’s going to be put on pain killers and they will have
her on antibiotics that will…”

“How are you so calm about this? Is it because you’re a doctor and this is how you are trained?”
Negan grimaced turning to stare out at Elaina who had moved in closer to the bed. The nurse had
returned with the snack for Negan and the juice that Y/N accepted for him so the nurse didn’t get
in the middle of their bickering. “Your little girl was hurt so bad that she is in the hospital needing
me to donate blood just so she will be okay. How are you handling this so fucking well? Because
I’m fucking terrified and I want to kill the bastard that did this to her.”

“Because if I don’t, I will break down,” Elaina responded with a trembling breath, throwing her
hands up in the air while she spoke. “Every day I have to put on a fake face and pretend that this
shit doesn’t bother me, but it does. We’re not heartless when we are doctors, we just have to shut
down or else we will go crazy. If I don’t control my emotions, I’m going to have a break down. We
lost Lucille only a couple of years ago Negan. My sister dying destroyed me. So, you have no idea
what this is doing to me on the inside. I’m holding together the best I can because if I don’t, I can’t
imagine the person I’m going to become. I’m going out of my mind with how scared I am, but I…
we have to be strong for Sam. It’s Sam that is going to need all the support possible because…”

In that moment Y/N saw Elaina start to cry and she felt her heart aching. When she started breaking
down, Negan reached out for her to move onto the bed with him so he could wrap his arms around
her. Y/N knew why she was there, but it felt like maybe this was a moment where the two of them
needed some space so she stood up from the chair at the corner of the room. Heading out of the
room, she went for the vending machine to grab Negan another juice so that way he would have
something to keep him going. There was no way they were going to be leaving this hospital until
Negan knew full well that Sam was alright. And Y/N was fully prepared to stay there as long as
she had to in order to be there for him. Not only him, but also Sam. She loved that little girl too.
Sam was part of her life now and she couldn’t picture a life without Sam in it now that she had
worked her way so easily into Y/N’s heart.

After a few minutes, she saw that Negan and Elaina were walking into the hallway looking for her.
Negan waved Y/N to them and he cleared his throat, “They are going to let us sit outside her room.
So come with us.”

“Are you sure?” she wasn’t sure that it would be okay with them if she did that. This was a family
moment and at this point, she didn’t know if they considered her family. “I know that I’m not
really anything to Sam.”

“Sam loves you,” Negan reminded her with a shake of his head, his hazel eyes desperate to have
her come with him. “I need you.”

“Okay,” she reached out to hook her fingers with his knowing that was all it took in order to get her
to agree to it. Sam was an amazing little girl and since she had gotten with Negan, their bond really
had gotten strong, but she didn’t want to step on anyone’s toes. They headed to the elevators to go
up to the floor where Sam’s room was. There were chairs in the hallway that they sat down at.
During that time Y/N got Negan to drink the juice that they had gotten him as well as eat the snack.
They were supposed to eat before this so there was no doubt in her mind that Negan’s sugar levels
would be off. An uncomfortable breath fell from Negan’s throat while he shifted beside her.
“Everything all right?”

“I just feel dizzy and kind of like I’m going to throw up,” Negan was honest with her and she slid in
closer beside him.

“Put your head down between your legs,” she instructed making Negan give her a confused
expression. “Negan trust me. It’s going to make the blood go to your brain so you don’t pass out.”

“Okay,” Negan did as she told him and while he did, she reached out to caress over the center of
Negan’s back in loving strokes trying to make him as comfortable as possible. Negan’s breathing
had been erratic since he had found out about Sam. There were no doubts in her mind that he was
scared out of his mind. “I’m sorry.”

“For what?” she inquired while taking her time to caress over his shoulders with her hand. Negan
lifted his head enough to glance over at her with a saddened expression. “You have nothing to
apologize for. I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else right now.”

“I love you,” Negan stammered, giving her a weak smile. It wasn’t something that he needed to
say. She wouldn’t have been there regardless, but by the expression in his eyes she knew that this
meant so much to him with having her there. Taking in slower breaths, Negan lowered his head
back down trying to get himself to start feeling better.

A minutes later, Y/N saw Elaina standing up when a woman approached Elaina with two coffees in
her hands. The woman was gorgeous. She was dressed in something nice that complimented her
tawny-brown skin tone. Her hair was pulled back into a ponytail drawing emphasis to her
cheekbones. When she leaned forward to kiss Elaina, Y/N let out a surprised breath, “That’s
Jane?”

“What?” Negan lifted his head to look over toward where Elaina was standing with the woman.
“Yeah, that’s Jane.”

“Negan, she’s super-hot,” Y/N blurt out making Negan glance back at her over his shoulder with a
confused glance. “I am so sorry. That was inappropriate of me to say that now, but she’s not…
she’s not what I was expecting.”

“Yeah, both her and Elaina are beautiful,” Negan agreed with her, his expression somewhat
amused for the first time since he had gotten there. Her outburst was probably ridiculous to Negan,
but when they talked about Jane in the past, the woman that just walked into the hallway was not
what she pictured. “What did you picture?”

“I don’t know, but holy crap,” Y/N swallowed down hard seeing the two women embrace making
Negan shake his head while she stared out at them.

“Try to contain your drooling, okay?” Negan reached out to poke her in the ribs in a playful manner
before reaching for the juice that Y/N had gotten him in attempts to try to drink it down. “I’m
surprised she’s been gone this long. You’d think she would have been here making sure Sam was
okay. She was probably too busy off on a business call again.”

That whole business call was going to stick with Negan. Truthfully? She didn’t blame him. If she
was in this position, she would have been upset with Jane as well for walking away. It wasn’t
Jane’s fault, but it wasn’t good for her that she wasn’t there when Sam got hurt.
After that, the four of them really sat in silence for what felt like forever until someone alerted
them that it would be alright to go into Sam’s room to be with her. One of the nurses offered to get
them two more chairs so they could all sit down with Sam. Y/N imagined they were going above
and beyond since Elaina was one of the doctors at the hospital. As they got up to approach the
hospital room, Jane stopped at the doorway and placed her hand over the center of Negan’s chest
before he could get into the room.

“We appreciate you coming all the way down here in order to do this for us, but I think now is the
time where Sam should be with her family,” Jane finally spoke up for the first time since she had
come into the hallway with them. That statement made Y/N wince because she knew that Negan
was not going to be okay with that. “Elaina and I need to be with Sam.”

“I’m not leaving Sam until I know everything is okay,” Negan shook his head, his hazel eyes
narrowing out at her. Elaina reached out to grab a hold of Jane’s shoulder to get her to move back
so Negan had room to move into the room with Y/N. When Negan saw Sam in the center of the
hospital bed, Y/N could feel him tense up beside her. Negan’s bottom lip began to quiver the
moment he saw it. Tears were developing in his eyes when he carefully stepped forward beside the
hospital bed to trace his fingertips over Sam’s face. Lowering down, Negan pressed a kiss over
Sam’s forehead. When Negan pulled back tears were sliding down his cheeks and Elaina moved
forward to caress in over Negan’s shoulder to comfort him. While they stood at the edge of the
bed, the nurse had brought the two other chairs in for them. “I’m gonna kill the person that hurt
her.”

“Oh, that’s a great way to start everything off Negan,” Jane sneered, moving beside the bed to the
seats that were there across from Negan and Elaina. Y/N stayed toward the corner of the room
knowing that she was just going to stand back to let them all have their moment. Negan’s fingers
were brushing through Sam’s hair when his head lifted. “I think what we should care about is that
Sam is okay. Don’t you?”

“Does everything have to be a fight with you?” Negan snarled, his nose wrinkling up in frustration
when Jane moved in beside the bed near Sam on the opposite side. “Sam is in the hospital hurt
because of you…”

“Don’t you dare blame this on me!” Jane yelled at Negan standing up from the chair to point her
finger out at him. “I was gone a minute. It was an accident and the person that did this was that son
of a bitch that hit her, not me.”

“If you would have been watching her, you could have been keeping an eye out for her. You could
have seen this whole thing coming,” Negan reminded her stepping back far enough away from the
bed to glare out at Jane. “Your business call couldn’t wait a damn second? You had to go in and
leave her alone? Why didn’t you just tell her to come back with you?”

“You’re the one that got her that damn skateboard,” Jane reminded Negan with a scowl making the
whole aura of the room uncomfortable.

“Under the rules that the only time she could use it was if one of us were watching her or were with
her,” Negan retold Jane, throwing his hand up in the air as he spoke.

“God, no one needs this right now Negan,” Jane snorted, reaching up to press her fingers to her
temple visibly stressed out with this whole encounter. “After you donated the blood you should
have just left.”

“I have every right to be here. Just as much as you do,” Negan was seething after that comment. By
the way he was breathing, Y/N knew that he was trying to hold himself back.
“No,” Jane raised her voice, her dark eyes full of anger while she battled off with Negan. “You
certainly don’t.”

“Listen, I know that the both of you are upset and rightfully so. You’re both scared because
someone you love got hurt,” Y/N finally spoke up stepping forward into the room further to bring
the attention to her instead of letting this fight go on. “But you’re here. Together for Sam. Sam is
sleeping and the last thing she needs is to wake up to hear the two of you fighting like this. I think
it’s best if you both calm down.”

“What is this Negan? A fucking field trip for the school?” Jane snorted folding her arms out in
front of her chest making Elaina lower her head into her palm. The way Jane gazed over what Y/N
was wearing felt very judgmental. To be fair, she was wearing Negan’s button-down shirt because
she hadn’t had time to change out of it when the found out that Sam was hurt. “You thought you
would bring your girlfriend here in a moment like this?”

“She’s Negan’s fiancée. Sam is really close to Y/N,” Elaina offered her input in with what was
going on. It was clear that she was trying to calm things down as well between Negan and Jane.
“They really hit it off and I know that Sam would appreciate having her here.”

“Of course they hit it off, they’re basically the same age,” Jane waved her hand in the air
dismissively before lowering her hand to place it over Sam’s shoulder to give it a firm squeeze.

“I’m actually not that young. I’m in my twenties and I’ve been an adult for quite some time,” Y/N
corrected Jane knowing that she didn’t want to take offense to anything that was going on because
of the situation at hand. Emotions were flying and all of this really did make sense. “There is an
age gap between us, but…”

“It shouldn’t matter. She is my fiancée now. She’s important in Sam’s life,” Negan declared, his
voice rasp while he tried to reason with Jane. “I love her. Sam loves her. She’s here to support the
both of us.”

“I can leave if you would like me to if it’s going to cause problems,” Y/N offered making Elaina
hold her hands up to stop her from doing so. “I don’t want to make things worse between everyone
because Sam is really the important thing at hand.”

“Which is why I think you need to be here too because Sam loves you,” Elaina finally held her
hand up in the air to silence all of them. “Negan and Y/N are staying. Please, for the sake of Sam,
would the two of you just stop fighting?”

“She hates me and even when I try it’s never good enough,” Negan frowned, sliding his fingers
around Sam’s hand that wasn’t hurt. “I love Sam with all of my heart…”

“You know why I hate you,” Jane was seething with hatred and Y/N knew that this was never
going to stop between them. They both kept going. It was a moment where neither one of them was
going to back down.

“You’re never going to let that shit go, are you?” Negan grunted, making Y/N sit down in the seat
that was at the bottom of the bed while she just sat back to let this whole thing happen. “How many
times can people say they are sorry?”

“I think this is a time where we all have to let things be the past,” Elaina suggested making Jane
roll her eyes while Jane continued to stroke her thumb over Sam’s shoulder.

“That’s easy for you to say,” Jane scoffed back making Elaina let out a saddened breath upon
hearing it. “I hate having him be part of this family. It makes everything uncomfortable. It’s more
than enough that we let Sam go over to his home all the time.”

“You act like I don’t have a right to see Sam,” Negan lowered down beside the bed to kneel so he
could be closer to Sam. “You know that I love Sam. You know that Sam means everything to me.”

“But she’s not yours Negan,” Jane reminded him making Negan lower his head to press his
forehead against Sam’s unhurt arm. “You have to understand that. No matter how much you love
her, she’s not yours.”

“But she loves me,” Negan stated, biting into his bottom lip while Elaina stared between the two of
them trying to determine what to do, but the expression showed that she just gave up. Elaina moved
in beside Sam to stroke her fingers through Elaina’s hair. “Just because two adults screwed up
doesn’t mean that you have to continue to take it out on her.”

“The mess that the two of you created is what makes this whole thing hard,” Jane glanced between
both Elaina and Negan making Negan’s jaw flex upon hearing her say that. “If things hadn’t gone
down the way they did, I wouldn’t hate having you around here Negan.”

“I think all three of us can admit that we did things wrong,” Elaina sighed finally offering up some
input making Y/N feel lost in all of this. It was a lot to take in. “There were a lot of things that went
wrong, but we all belong here with her. We all deserve to be with her and this is not the way we
should be acting when she’s hurt.”

“He does not deserve to be here,” Jane restated again stressing those words making Y/N lower her
head while she continued to hear their fight. “He’s here out of circumstances that were out of our
reach. He’s just lucky that he gets to be here.”

“Wow,” Y/N let out an exhausted breath, resting back against the chair when she finally heard
enough of all of this. “When are any of you going to think about the child that is laying between
the three of you? Sam is hurt. It’s awful. The person that hurt Sam, I hope the police are doing
everything they can to bring that person to justice. What we need in general is faith that whoever
did this to Sam gets caught. But what Sam needs the most is the people who love her just to relax,
take in a deep breath and just be here for Sam. No one is to blame for this, but the person who hit
her and left. It may have been an accident, but when they ran off, they made it worse. Them
running off proves that it came from something negative. We don’t need to make this situation any
worse. Negan, Jane…it’s time to stop for Sam. The past doesn’t matter right now. What matters is
Sam.”

Every single one them went silent when Y/N shook her head slowly, “You know what I see? I see
three people that love a little girl so much that they are lost inside themselves. Eager to point the
blame at someone else because they don’t know how to handle their emotions. There is an
incredible little girl that is there because of all of you. Elaina, Jane…you both are her mothers.
From my time getting to know Sam, I can’t tell you how much the two of you mean to that little
girl. When she talks about being with the two of you, she just smiles from ear to ear.”

When Y/N said that, Jane lowered her head and tears filled her eyes visibly distraught over what
was going on with her daughter, “But what you both have to understand is that when Sam is with
Negan it’s laughter the whole time. They are both silly and goofy. They have so much fun together.
Their bond is beautiful and I think we all know that. I think we all know that Negan belongs here
at the end of the day. He is Sam’s father after all.”

When she said that, Negan lifted his head to stare out at her with his hazel eyes that were surprised
with what she had said, “It all makes sense when you think about it. Sam has a rare blood type.
Elaina doesn’t have that blood type so you have to call Negan who you know has the blood type
that she needs in order to help her. Negan being here makes you feel like your parental rights are
being questioned Jane because Elaina and Negan are the biological parents of Sam. Which makes
everything tense. There is a whole lot of stuff between you three that I could probably never pull
apart, but it all makes sense at the end of the day. I just think we all need to calm down, ignore the
past and just focus right now so Sam’s father and her two mothers can be with her.”

There was a certain panic in everyone’s eyes when she said what she did, “I’m right. Aren’t I?
Negan is her father.”

After a moment of silence, Jane shook her head and looked back to Sam, “I can’t believe you told
her that you were her father. We had an agreement.”

“I didn’t,” Negan’s Adam’s apple bounced his throat when he realized that Y/N was able to piece
everything together making him question what kind of stance he had in her life now that she knew
Sam was his daughter. “Not once.”

“It’s not like you two make it hard for someone to figure out,” Y/N brushed her fingers through her
hair knowing that it took a few minutes, but after everything all of it started to make sense. “I mean
it was obvious from the moment she walked in the door of your home Negan. She had the dimples.
She has the same mannerisms as you. Yet she doesn’t know. She just thinks you’re Uncle Negan.”

“It’s complicated,” Elaina tried to reason with Y/N who simply shrugged her shoulders knowing
that she wasn’t about to start anything with these people that were already so deep within
themselves with grief.

“It’s not my place. I don’t know why Sam doesn’t know he’s her father or why she thinks some
random guy is the doner, but that little girl looks like the two of you perfectly mixed together.
Anyone with eyes can see that Sam is Negan and Elaina’s daughter. Now, rightfully so you are the
legal parent of her Jane and I understand you being upset, but in this kind of situation I think you
would be willing to make an exception to let Sam’s father be here for her. Don’t you think?”

“Yeah,” Jane simply muttered finally having some sense of calm that surrounded them. A
surprised sound fell from Jane’s lips when Sam started to move, her green eyes fluttering to an
open making all of them let out tense breath. “Hey baby…”

“There are those beautiful green eyes,” Negan lowered into press a kiss over the back of Sam’s
hand, a shuddering breath falling from his throat. “It’s so good to see you awake baby girl.”

“Is it true?” Sam’s breath was uneven making Negan’s face sink when she looked specifically to
him. “I kept my eyes closed to pretend I wasn’t awake. Are you really my dad?”

Negan looked between Jane and Elaina looking for something to say. It was like he was trying to
get them to have some kind of response for Sam since this was obviously a situation that was more
complicated than something that could be settled so quickly with a yes or no answer.

“I think we should take things easy here sweetheart,” Elaina brushed her fingers through Sam’s
hair, trying to get her daughter to focus on something else. It was a stressed moment and this was
exactly something they obviously wanted to avoid.

“I think I deserve to know,” Sam attempted to move, but let out a pained sound when she looked to
her arm that was in the cast that they had put it in after resetting everything. All three of them
moved forward to try to help her, but she weakly raised her good arm up. “Please. Someone tell me
the truth. Do you hate Negan because he’s my father? My real father.”
“It’s a little more complicated than that,” Jane tried to explain, but it was clear she wasn’t sure what
to say to Sam, so Sam looked to Elaina who seemed just as flustered on giving her daughter an
answer in that moment. “Sam, I don’t think now is the time to talk about this. You were in an
accident and it was really severe sweetheart. I think right now is just about healing and getting
ourselves to feel better.”

“Negan, please tell me. Please don’t lie to me,” Sam stared up at Negan with tears in her eyes
making Negan’s jaw twitch upon her doing that. Negan’s bottom lip was still trembling, a labored
breath falling from his throat when his emotions were getting the better of him. “Are you my
father?”

“Sam,” Negan spoke, tears pressing down the side of his face while he stared down at her. His
body was slumped forward toward her while he balanced his weight on the bed beside her. “Yeah.
I am. I’m your dad.”

When Negan confessed that to Sam, Sam’s eyes immediately started to swell up with tears and she
turned her face in toward her shoulder in attempts to hide that she was getting emotional from the
three of them that were surrounding her, “I want to be alone with mom.”

“Baby,” Jane reached out to touch Sam’s shoulder to try to comfort her daughter and Sam shook
her head. “I think we need to talk about this when you are feeling better.”

“I want to be alone with my other mom,” Sam looked up at Elaina with big eyes, tears sliding down
the side of her face. Seeing Sam like that had Negan in a miserable state. Knowing Negan, all he
wanted to do was take Sam into his arms and hug her to help her through her tears, but he also
knew she requested something very specific from him.

Without question, Y/N got up from where she was seated and headed into the hallway to wait for
Negan. Negan reached out to brush his fingers in over Sam’s before giving her a nod. Heading into
the hallway, her arms immediately wrapped around Negan when he fell into her embrace letting his
emotions get the best of him. Side stepping away from the entrance of the hospital room so Sam
didn’t have to see everything, Negan tried to pull himself together when Jane moved out of the
hospital room. Closing the door behind her, Jane just seemed to move over toward one of the chairs
and Negan lifted his head to stare out at Y/N with an anxiousness in his eyes.

“I guess I have some explaining to do,” Negan whimpered making Y/N shrug her shoulders
knowing that this whole thing was bigger than her. Would she appreciate knowing what was going
on? Sure, but she didn’t want to force something out of Negan that he didn’t want to tell her in the
first place. Where they went next was completely up to him.
 Chapter 14
Chapter Summary

After discovering that Sam is Negan's daughter, Y/N learns about Negan's past when
he finally decides to open up to her about everything that happened.

Chapter Notes

I'm a little out of sorts today because I was up all night, so if this a mess, I apologize.
I'll read it over later and make sure things make sense lol. Thanks to anyone that reads
this! I appreciate you!

“Here,” Negan led Y/N through the hospital after getting a few minutes to themselves. Heading for
the doors that led to the garden area outside on the first floor, Negan knew they needed a moment
together. A relieved breath escaped his throat when he saw that no one was out there. They were
going to need some time alone in order to discuss things now that the truth about Sam had been
revealed. A slight chill filled the air when they walked out. It was dark now and the small area was
only lit by the lights on the side of the hospital walls. Dragging his feet over toward one of the
picnic tables that was set up, Negan pulled himself up to sit on top of it while digging into his pants
to reach for his cigarettes. When he got the box out, his fingers trembled while attempting to pull it
open. “I need to smoke.”

“Not right now you don’t,” she reached out to snag the box from his hands in a flash. There was
shock over his tear-stained face when his reddened hazel eyes locked with hers. Shoving the box
into her back pocket, she kept the cigarettes from him and saw Negan frown upon her doing that.
“You just donated blood. You’re not supposed to be smoking for a few hours. You’re also not
supposed to be moving around incredibly much, so let’s take it easy, okay?”

“How are you the one being the only adult today?” Negan muttered to himself rubbing at his
temple trying to get himself to relax after the whole encounter that just took place. A cigarette
would have certainly helped him relax right now, but if she was insistent upon this, he wasn’t
going to push it. “I can only imagine what is going through your mind right now.”

“I think you would be surprised,” she retorted with a simple shake of her head, a smirk tugging at
the corners of her lips. Yeah, this was a lot to take in all at once, but she was even surprised with
how well she was actually taking everything. Her in the past? She probably wouldn’t have been
this calm about things. “The number one thing I’m feeling right now? Relief. Relief that the
incredible little girl that I know woke up and she was cohesive enough to understand what was
going on. That everything seems like it is going to be okay. Everything else is secondary. All that
matters is that Sam looks like she is going to pull through. It could have been so much worse than
it was. That’s all that matters to me. I hate seeing her like that, but just seeing here awake and
conscious? That’s what is important.”

When she said that, Negan’s furrowed eyebrows loosened and he swiftly stood up to curl his
fingers around the side of her neck to pull her closer to him. With his thumb sweeping in over the
side of her jawline she felt his lips colliding with hers. The answer she gave him obviously touched
him leading him to this kind of response. Against his lips she could taste the remainder of his tears
that still lingered over his flesh. When he pulled away, he lowered his head and pressed it in against
hers.

“You have no idea how much I appreciate you saying that,” Negan confessed hating that he was
originally afraid of what her response to this whole thing would be. “I was so fucking scared
coming here today. I thought she might not wake up.”

“I’m not saying it to appease you Negan. I’m saying it because I mean it. I’ve told you in the past
so many times that I believe both you and Sam changed me. Sam is very important to me and I love
her,” she clarified how she felt about things. It was like a weight had been lifted from Negan’s
chest when she said that out loud. “And of course you were going to be fucking terrified. That’s
why I drove you here Negan. Daughter or not, I knew that she meant the world to you.”

“I know I should have been more forthcoming about the whole daughter thing…” Negan
stammered, attempting to find the right words to describe everything that was going on inside of his
mind. Looking up at the night sky, he knew that he often could talk about everything and anything,
but right now he didn’t know what was right or wrong. “I thought you maybe you would have
wanted to leave the moment you found out.”

“I wouldn’t do that. I promise. Although, I would be willing to learn a little bit more about what the
hell was going on between you and Jane in there,” she stated with a shrug of her shoulders, lifting
her palm to slide it down over the side of Negan’s face. It made her sad that the person she used to
be made Negan not only worry about his daughter dying, but he also had to worry that once Y/N
found out about it that it may have made her leave him. Regardless, there seemed to be a lot of
things going on between Negan, Jane and Elaina that she could only imagine while playing out
scenarios in her head. “I mean, I can predict a few things, but I’m not entirely sure.”

“It goes back a long way,” Negan dropped his hand slowly from her face before back stepping
toward the picnic table to sit on top of it again. Standing across from him, she knew that he was
uncomfortable just by his body language. It made her think that there was so much more to that trio
than he was really willing to give up to her.

“Well, I’m assuming that you and Elaina had an affair which resulted in Sam being born,” Y/N
gathered what she thought happened from the bickering between Jane and Negan before Sam woke
up. As Negan’s face scrunched up, she found herself surprised when she realized that wasn’t what
obviously happened. Most people probably would have assumed that after hearing Jane and Negan
fighting like they were. Obviously, they were both attempting to be vague, but with the way they
were talking it really seemed like Negan and Elaina had Sam out of an affair. “Or not?”

“No, we didn’t have an affair that resulted in Sam being born. Sam was planned,” Negan took in a
long inhale, his fingers curling around the table that was beneath him. Every time Negan went to
speak up, he found himself caught up in his worries of what she would actually think of him. It
made him stutter his words and shift uncomfortable on top of the picnic table. Most people he
would have just bluntly told things to, but he was actually worried about Y/N’s response. “I’m
going to be honest with you. About everything. If at the end of this you decide you don’t want to be
with me anymore, then that’s fine. I mean, I would prefer that…this doesn’t change anything, but
that’s not my decision to make. It’s yours.”

“I’ll hear you out first,” she asserted knowing that Negan’s mind was automatically thinking the
worst while he stammered to find the right thing to start with. It made her feel bad about all the
negative shit she put him through in the past. If she wouldn’t have been so aggressive about not
wanting to have a relationship or family with him, she was certain he would have been more open
with her about things in the past. Part of this felt like it was her fault.

“I guess it’s good to start at the beginning. I’ve already told you about Lucille and I. Lucille was
my first. She was my high school girlfriend and she was my first everything,” Negan spoke about
his past and that was really nothing new. He had told her that almost immediately when they were
starting this whole thing between them. “Elaina is two years younger than Lucille. I guess…no, I
know that Elaina had a massive crush on me long before I ever got with Lucille. We lived by each
other. We grew up with each other. I just, I always had a crush on Lucille, you know? She was it
for me. Lucille was the wild, spunky one that was the good girl, but also had that spicy attitude.
She had that for as long as I could remember. Elaina was more of the quiet, reserved one.”

“I thought Elaina was attracted to women,” Y/N was confused about the obvious since Elaina was
married to jane.

“Both of them are bisexual with a preference for women,” Negan answered her with a simple shrug
of his shoulders. That made sense. It wasn’t really her business what their sexuality was deep
down, but it was what Negan was telling her. “I mean kind of. I think I was the only guy that
Elaina may have ever liked.”

“Okay,” Y/N waited for the big part that was supposed to surprise her at this point since there was
so much tension between Jane and Negan in the first place.

“Well, when Lucille broke up with me like I told you that first time…I wasn’t thinking clearly.
Elaina was there and she was trying to comfort me. One thing led to another and the two of us
ended up sleeping together,” Negan informed her with a heavy sigh, entangling his fingers
together. His expressive eyebrows bounced up while he tipped his head to the side. Well, that was
shocking. If Y/N was Lucille, she was fairly certain that she would have kicked Negan’s ass after
that one. “I obviously knew that after it happened it wasn’t supposed to happen. I was in love with
her sister who had dumped me. That was it. Doing that made me realize that I wanted Lucille. She
was the only one I wanted.”

“And Lucille knew about this?” Y/N confirmed folding her arms out in front of her chest while she
listened to everything that Negan was laying out before her. Negan painted a picture of Lucille for
her in the past where he compared her to Lucille. If she was in Lucille’s position, she was sure she
would have never taken Negan back. Most likely, she would have never talked to her sister again
and would have full on kicked Negan in the balls if that happened to her. So maybe Lucille was a
more forgiving person than she was.

“I never hid anything from Lucille. She knew. Trust me, she was fucking pissed. I went to her
fucking crying after it happened because I felt so bad. I confessed everything. Of course and
rightfully so she didn’t take me back after that. It was when I got injured playing baseball where I
think we both just realized the mistake that we made in being apart from each other,” Negan
pointed out knowing that it was complicated and after that Lucille probably shouldn’t have taken
him back. Negan was a fuck up. A huge fuck up. There was no doubting that. “After we got back
together, uhm, she ended up getting pregnant and we got married at nineteen. Then she lost the
baby and we found out she’d never be able to have one again.”

“Right, I know that part. But what makes Jane hate you so much?” Y/N poked further trying to
understand this whole thing. It couldn’t just be that Negan was the only man that Elaina had ever
been with. That would make Jane petty. “Was she dating Elaina when that happened? Were they
high school sweethearts?”
“Patience princess. I’m getting to that point. I just want you to know everything,” Negan hushed
her stretching out his hand in hopes that she would take his. Glancing down at it, she stepped
forward to accept it in her grasps while he continued on with the discussion. “I don’t want any of
this to be kept a secret from you.”

“And I appreciate that,” she declared with a half-smirk knowing that this was taking a lot out of
Negan. He was upset about it. There was no doubt about that. Just part of her wished he would get
to the point because it was certainly something that he thought was bad.

“Elaina and Jane met in college. Got married right after it. They were together a few years and they
wanted a baby,” Negan began to explain, swallowing down the lump that was developing in his
throat. “At that time, obviously people were giving them shit because people are homophobic
assholes. Lucille and I also wanted a child, so the four of us came up with the idea of me being the
donor for them. They had the money, they were stable enough to have a family, but there were so
many stupid rules having a baby like that. It just seemed like the right thing to do. Obviously, my
family had money, so the baby was going to be well off no matter what because the baby would
have all four of us taking care of them.”

“So did you and Elaina have sex to do it?” she questioned and Negan scoffed when she said it
making her throw her hands up in the air. “I don’t know how this whole thing goes Negan. You
said people were giving them shit. The two of you had sex before, Jane hates you…I’m just trying
to put this all together in a way that makes sense.”

“Since you’re so big on details, I was having problems with jerking off into a specimen container
so my wife jerked me off to help me with my performance anxiety. Lucille collected the sperm. We
gave it to Elaina and Jane…” Negan recalled in probably too much detail what happened because
Y/N’s cheeks flushed over with color and she chuckled. “You want me to tell you what happened.”

“I mean, yeah,” she rolled her eyes finding herself trying to hold back on her amusement with the
way he just blurt all of that out. “All you had to tell me is you collected it in a specimen container
but thank you for letting me know that Lucille gave you a hand job. You’re really hitting home on
that completely honest thing. I guess details are important of how your daughter was conceived.”

“Right, well I mean the baby was supposed to belong to all four of us. So Lucille was involved
with my end and then they you know…suctioned out the…” Negan tried to think of a way to
explain what happened after Elaina and Jane got the specimen, but Y/N held her hands up in the air
to stop him. “I just mean they obviously did whatever they had to do to put it inside of Elaina.”

“Okay,” she laughed at the way he described it. It was hard to keep a straight face from his
explanation. Trying to be respectful, she lowered her head to try to calm herself in the moment
because she was more so amused with the way he said things. Negan was pretty suave and
charming for the most part, but right now he seemed more ridiculous than sexy, but she knew he
was uncomfortable. “So it worked.”

“Right, it worked and the four of us were parents. We all kind of shared Sam,” Negan explained
thinking back to the beginning and he licked his lips while thinking about things. “It worked for all
of us because we all wanted a baby. Lucille couldn’t have one. Elaina was her sister. It was the
closest thing, you know? So half the time would be spent with me and Lucille, the other with
them.”

“I don’t understand,” she tried to put together the details, but things were missing. When Y/N first
met Sam, Sam had mentioned that she spent a lot of time with Lucille and Negan growing up, but it
never really went into details. “If you were sharing her, what happened? Why does Sam not know
that you are her biological father?”
“Because Sam got exceedingly attached to me. I wanted a baby so bad, you know? So I pampered
the hell out of her. We had loads of fun. I gave her my whole heart,” Negan clarified, his tears
beginning to flood his eyes and he simply shrugged his shoulders. Hooking her fingers tightly with
his, she could see that his other fist was clenching at his side. “It got to the point where whenever
she would leave me, she would just cry. Non-stop for hours on end. Whenever she was sick, she
would scream and cry for me. Sam liked being with me more. Which I understand why it hurt
them.”

There was a pained sound that fell from Negan’s throat when he lowered his head and he stroked
over the back of his neck with his free hand. Moving in beside him when she realized it was
actually something that really upset him, she sat on the picnic table with him. Placing her hand
over his shoulders to give him the support that he needed gave him the confidence he needed to
continue, “We kept it up for about six years. She had three moms and a dad. It worked. For
everyone, but Jane. Apparently, she thought when they were coming to me, I was just going to the
donor. Jerk off into a cup and then be done with it. The three of us came up with something else
when we knew that Lucille couldn’t have babies. I thought we were all okay with it. One night,
Sam was with them and she snuck out because she wanted to get back to me. She packed a bag…
imagine a six-year-old little girl doing this. She climbed out of her window because they told her
she couldn’t be with me and she started walking the route she knew that they took to get to me and
Lucille.”

“So the bond was always there,” Y/N maintained hearing the sadness that was in Negan’s tone
when he was explaining things to her. “I don’t understand. The two of you love each other so
much. Why does Sam not know you are her father now?”

“Because I was guilted into signing over my rights,” Negan blurt it out making her face flush over
with red when she heard that. “Even before Sam took off that day, Jane had papers drawn up. She
came to me several times asking me to sign over my rights. She would record Sam when she had
her meltdowns that she couldn’t be with me to try to guilt me. Thing was, Lucille and I loved her so
much that we didn’t want to give her up. This was because there was a mix-up between Elaina and
Jane. On paper, I was Sam’s father and Elaina was her mother. Which meant that if something
were to happen to Elaina that neither Lucille nor Jane could do anything because Elaina and I were
the parents. Elaina wanted a child for them. It was something that was a confusion between the
two. I don’t blame her for being upset. I just, I loved Sam so much, you know? From the first
moment I held her in my arms, I knew that she was my perfect little angel.”

“How did she guilt you into signing over your rights though Negan? I don’t…I don’t understand,”
Y/N pushed further trying to understand everything that happened. Negan was so strong and he
really didn’t seem like the type that would just give up his own child that easily. “It doesn’t really
make sense. They could have just found another way to adopt another child while the rest of you
shared Sam.”

“I know and I thought the same thing at first. I should have kept my foot down, but the day that
Sam disappeared to come find me…I don’t know I guess she tripped and fell. Got a few scratches
and this old couple found her, took her to the hospital. Jane was the first one to get there and they
wouldn’t let her in because she wasn’t legally Sam’s mother. They wanted to wait for me or
Elaina,” Negan grimaced when he thought back on what he had done. “We got there and Jane
ripped me a new one. Saying that I was confusing Sam too much. That was I hurting her and if we
kept up what we were doing that I was going to lose my daughter because she would get herself
killed trying to get to me. I was emotional. My daughter had been missing for hours and when I
find out where she was, she’s in the hospital. I thought the worst. I believed Jane. I thought if we
kept doing what we were, I was going to find out that my daughter was attempting to get to me and
she got hit by a car. So I signed the papers and I gave up my rights as a father so she could be
legally Sam’s mother. It was the worst decision that I’ve ever made in my whole life and I’ve
regretted it from the first moment I did it.”

“That’s really fucked up Negan,” Y/N seethed at the idea knowing that it was awful to actually
hear what went down.

“Yeah, it was, but I don’t blame Jane for being upset. I know she thought something else was
happening and then we all got scared when Sam took off,” Negan waved his hands in the air trying
to make sense of everything. “When Lucille found out what I did she hated me for it. I hated
myself for it. It fucked up all of our relationships. I tried to fight it once I got my head back on, but
I couldn’t beat it. The best I got is that they offered to let me see her once a month if I didn’t act
like I was her father. So I took it. Because something was better than nothing.”

“I feel like you could have figured something out if you got the right lawyer,” Y/N reasoned with
Negan finding herself even mortified with what she had just heard from Negan. Shaking her head,
she felt her chest aching at the thought of it all. “That’s terrible Negan. As you can see when your
child is hurt you don’t think straight. Sam deserved to have all of you in her life. Lucille didn’t
even get a say in it and that was her child too.”

“I know. But it happened and there was nothing I could do about it,” Negan shrugged his shoulders
letting out a trembling breath when the tears continued to burn at his eyes. “Then Lucille got sick
and I think they felt bad about what had happened so they started letting Sam come over whenever
she wanted. It was probably for Lucille to try to give her the strength to keep going. After Lucille
died, I was in a really bad place. I think they let Sam keep seeing me so that way I didn’t kill
myself. I told you, I genuinely considered doing it, but Sam is the only thing that kept me here.”

“And that’s why Jane hates you?” Y/N was flustered with all of this knowing that if anyone should
have been hating someone, it didn’t seem like Jane was at the top of the list. “I don’t understand
why she hates you for that. Yeah, it made things complicated and I can comprehend that. There
would be tension between all of you…”

“She hates me because after Lucille died it hit both me and Elaina really hard. Lucille was my
everything. Other than Sam, she was all that I had,” Negan claimed with a bounce of his eyebrows.
“Elaina came over on one of the nights that I was really bad. I told you I considered killing myself.
And we got emotional over what happened with Lucille. I think we were just trying to make each
other feel better.”

“Oh,” realization finally hit Y/N when it dawned on her what Negan was trying to say to her. “The
two of you…”

“It was just that one time. It started with just a kiss and then led to…other things,” Negan licked at
his lips in a nervous movement, throwing his hands up in the air while he spoke. “It was a mistake,
but Jane knew how Elaina felt about me in the past. I told you I wasn’t a good man. I know the
things that I did were awful, but like you said when you are sad you do things that you don’t
always mean to…”

There was a silence between them and Negan’s face twisted with discomfort. A loud exhale falling
from his throat, “They fought about it because Elaina felt guilty and told Jane. Jane came over to
fight with me over it. I think…I think she was just trying to understand why Elaina liked me so
much. One moment we are screaming at each other and then the next…”

“Well that took an interesting turn,” Y/N laughed inwardly making her stand up from the table
while she paced before Negan trying to process what he just said. That wasn’t at all where she
thought this whole thing was going. “So you’ve slept with both of them? You and Jane slept
together?”

“We did,” Negan was honest, his hazel eyes staring up at her with fear when he admitted that to
her. “I think after that happened, it brought the two of them back together because they both felt
like it cancelled out what had happened with Elaina and I…”

“Now I understand the hating you thing,” Y/N waved her hand out in the air making Negan clear
his throat uncomfortably. “You can’t really blame Jane when you slept with her wife.”

“But then she slept with me,” Negan reminded her with an arch of his right eyebrow. “She made
the same mistake that Elaina did.”

“I’m not so sure it was a mistake on her end. It was probably to spite what happened between
Elaina and you. It was probably to prove to Elaina that whatever she may have thought was special
between the two of you was just you being a scummy, horny ass male. For Jane, yeah, it was
probably her trying to understand why the fuck Elaina liked you and was willing to ruin her
marriage on someone like you,” Y/N insisted letting out an uncomfortable breath while she put it
all together. Negan seemed scared when her words came out in a fast slew of ideas that were
swirling around in her head. “And of course you’re a male that thinks holy shit, it’s two incredibly
sexy bisexual women that want to fuck me instead of thinking about the repercussions of it.”

“Well, I mean…” Negan went to speak up in his own defense but stopped when he thought about
what she had actually said to him. “Yeah, I’m a man. You’re not wrong. It was totally wrong of me
and I just let it happen.”

“Do you have emotions for one of them?” she went for what just needed to be known at the end of
all of this. “Is there one of them that you wish you could be with if it was possible?”

“I care about both of them and I will always think fondly of Elaina for being the mother of my
child, but I don’t love them…” Negan stood up from where he was seated to move across the
garden to reach out for her hands to grab a firm hold of them. “I hated the person I became after
Lucille died. I was a mess. I let my life spiral downward. It was why I decided to move. Start over.
The rest is history. Well, history that you have been part of. I’ve loved three people in my life. My
daughter. Lucille. And you. You have my heart, but I understand if after you’ve heard this you
want nothing to do with me anymore. I would hate it, but I would understand it. I probably should
have told you that Sam was my daughter from the start. It’s just not even Sam knew anymore. You
know?”

“I should have realized it myself from the start. Deep down I think I always knew,” she stated with
a deep shallow breath, reaching out to push her fingers in over the center of Negan’s chest. “Yeah,
you made some questionable choices. You did some things that you probably deserved to be
kicked in the balls for…”

“No doubt,” Negan agreed with her, snorting when she said it. It left them silent for a moment
while she thought about what needed to be said right now. Negan on the other hand was visibly
just worried about all of this.

“Negan, I love you. I don’t want to give you up. I want you to be in my life for as long as possible.
You being honest with me about your past makes me believe that you are trustworthy,” she
admitted knowing that in the past she may have been hitting herself upside the head for this
decision, but her heart belonged to Negan. There was no changing that. “I believe you’re a good
man that had a rough hand dealt to you. I want to be here with you through everything. I want to
share everything with you. I love you. I love you so much. I can’t live without you.”
“Yeah?” Negan stammered, trying to gather himself. There seemed to be some shock flooding
through his features when she left him with that statement. There was some relief too that was
visible. Maybe he thought that once she found out he lied and the situation that she would have left
him. “I didn’t think you would handle this as well as you are.”

“This happened before I was in your life,” she shook her head knowing that while it was a lot to
take in, this wasn’t something she could judge him or leave him for. Especially when his little girl
was lying in a hospital bed upstairs after being injured. “I’ll be here for you through everything
Negan. I already agreed to being your wife, I’m sticking this out. I told you at the beginning of our
relationship that I didn’t care if you had a daughter. I understand why you didn’t tell me. Although,
I should have realized the whole time who she was to you. It was obvious as fuck.”

“Well, she does look a lot like her mom,” Negan pointed out, tipping his head to the side. “I think
she looks more like her mom.”

“She has blonde hair and green eyes, but she has your smile and your dimples,” she immediately
said in a rebuttal. Sliding her palm up, she traced her thumb in over one of Negan’s very visible
dimples. It made Negan smirk and lower his head. “And she acts so much like you.”

“Don’t tell her moms that because they wouldn’t like it,” Negan hushed her, turning his head into
the center of her hand so he could press a kiss over her palm. Unhurriedly, he pulled his lips away
from her flesh and raised his gaze back up to hers. There was still tension in his expression when he
swallowed down hard. “I thought you were going to leave me.”

“For having a daughter?” she was confused why he thought that.

“Families weren’t your thing, remember?” Negan recalled the conversations they had in the past.
“You had a hard time even accepting me as your boyfriend. The fact that you are okay being with a
man who has a twelve-year-old child just didn’t seem like who you were when we first started
dating.”

“Well, you and Sam changed me with that,” she suggested knowing that he wasn’t wrong. The idea
of having someone that counted on her did bother her originally. Especially since she had such high
hopes and dreams for a future with her career. She wanted to be the best at what she did and her
father convinced her that having a family or a boyfriend would have held her back from that. “The
more time I spent with the both of you…it reminded me of what I was missing with my own family
growing up. I love Sam and I love you. I loved Sam before I knew she was your daughter. Even if I
did have suspicions from the start.”

“I was so scared of losing you,” Negan acknowledged clearing his throat. Maybe it was pathetic,
but he had grown so attached to Y/N that the idea of losing her terrified him. “You’re part of my
everyday life now and I couldn’t imagine not having you in it.”

“You’re not losing me,” she hushed him, tipping up on her toes to meet him in a passionate kiss
knowing that things were hard enough for him as it was right now. When she pulled back, she
traced her thumb in over his jawline and sighed. “I think you need to work on your relationship
with Elaina and Jane though.”

“How do you suggest me do that?” Negan was oblivious to how she thought he could do
something like that. “Jane hates me.”

“Jane doesn’t hate you. She just wants to know that her being Sam’s parent is just as valid,” she
declared knowing that she actually understood Jane. Jane was the victim of feeling like she wasn’t
good enough and Y/N completely understood that position. “Plus, I hate to point this out, but you
had an affair with Elaina who apparently has had a crush on you since she was a child. Of course
that is going to breed some hatred.”

“Elaina doesn’t love me though. We were just in a weird place and we took comfort in the wrong
way,” Negan pointed out thinking back on what he told Y/N about what had happened between all
three of them. “Not that I’m excusing it because you’re right. It was wrong of us. But she slept with
me too. I don’t think she should hate me as much as she does if she did it too.”

“I can’t believe you let that happen,” she snickered surprising Negan with how she was responding
to the idea of the two of them sleeping with him. “It really is kind of fucked up Negan. I hope you
know that.”

“I…yeah. I know,” Negan frowned, lowering his head while noticing the incredible amount of
tension in his neck. “I just wasn’t thinking after I lost Lucille. She was everything to me and I just
was so fucked up. I should have thought about what I was doing, but I just didn’t care. I told you, I
didn’t like the person that I was. I care about both of them, but I don’t know why that happened. I
was numb. I think I was just looking for any way to feel better. I thought it was sex and it wasn’t.
That just made me feel so much worse.”

“And now a lot of what we talked about makes sense. I just wish you would have opened up with
me about things in the past,” she knew that she. Now it kind of all made sense. “Then again, I
might have not understood and I guess…I guess things happen for a reason.”

It was strange how fast you could change when you found yourself in love with someone. The
person you thought you were was nothing but a stranger in your past that you could barely
recognize. Sometimes the person you loved made you worse, but sometimes you met that
incredibly amazing person that awoke things inside of you that you thought were never possible.
That was what Negan was for her. Negan made her realize it was okay to love someone while
wanting the best for yourself.

“So,” she took in a long inhale knowing that she was trying to think of something to lighten the
mood between the two of them, “how does it feel to know that you made two women know for
certain that they would rather be with women than men?”

“Oh, shut up,” Negan rolled his eyes, letting out a grunt when he stepped back toward the picnic
table. He knew that she was screwing with him which was amusing him because it definitely
showed that she was just busting his chops and not mad at him. “Or maybe I was so good that both
of them knew that there was nothing better than me?”

“Oh, please honey,” she snorted watching his face turn a light shade of red when she started
laughing. “I love you, but that’s not how that shit works.”

“I’m glad you’re having fun making fun of me with this,” Negan pouted when she stepped forward
to reach for his hands, giving his arms a little wiggle while she held onto his hands. “It makes
things very complicated with Sam.”

“You saved Sam’s life today. I think when things calm down, things will get better,” she suggested
knowing that it might be complicated for a while, but it was because of Negan that Sam was safe.
Even with this all coming to fruition, she was confident that Sam would want Negan in her life as
her father. “You just have to give it some time.”

“I don’t know if any of them are going to forgive me for this,” Negan’s bottom lip trembled when
he thought about Sam asking to be alone with Elaina. “Sam may never want to see me again and
they might be angry with me that Sam knows I’m her father after all of this time.”
“I think right now Sam is just confused. I know that little girl loves the hell out of you. So that’s
not going to happen,” she reached out to brush her fingers through Negan’s hair to get him to look
at her straight on. “Listen to me, she should have known this whole time. You deserved to be part
of her life. Even if you still had the same arrangement going on, I think Sam should have been able
to know that you were her father.”

“I wanted to be honest with her,” Negan reasoned leaning forward to rest his head against the
center of her chest. With him close to her, she stroked over the back of his head, brushing her
fingers through his thick hair while he took in a shallow breath. “It was just hard all around and I
didn’t know what to do. I was afraid that if I was honest, I would lose her.”

“I know,” she didn’t say anything more. Truthfully? She wasn’t in his shoes, so she couldn’t be
someone to claim she would do one thing or another. She could say that she would have done
something different, but until you are in that situation, you would never really know. “I have a
feeling that everything is going to be okay.”

“I love you,” Negan breathed against the center of her chest, keeping his head rested against her.
His eyes were closed and all he kept thinking about was how sad Sam was when he left the room.
It was the last thing he wanted to see, but it just happened. It was out of his control. “I don’t know
if I could have made it through everything if you weren’t here with me.”

“You’re one of the strongest people I know Negan, you would have been fine,” she lowered down
enough to press a kiss over the top of his head. Since Negan had just gotten out of the shower right
before they left, his hair still smelled freshly of the shampoo that they used. “I’m just glad that
you’re being honest with me. That’s what relationships are all about. Being honest and growing
with each other.”

Pulling his head away from her chest, he lifted his head and his eyes were focused on hers, “I don’t
think you know how much I genuinely love you. I know this was rushed in some people’s eyes. I
know this was a strange start, but I feel like I’ve known you forever. My heart…” Negan reached
for her hand to place it over the center of his chest once more, “it belongs to you.”

“And mine belongs to you,” she whispered reaching for his other hand to place it over the center of
her chest making his big eyes fill with happiness while staring out at her. “You’re everything to
me. And then some…”

Negan stood from the picnic table to wrap her up in his arms. They stood in silence just clinging to
one another for quite some time before she let out a tiny laugh. Tipping back enough to stare down
at her, Y/N shook her head, “although, after seeing Jane and being with you…I might think about
swinging for the other side.”

“That’s not funny,” Negan smirked knowing that she was playing with him to be a smartass. “I
know her and Elaina are both very beautiful…”

“Yeah, they are hot,” she poked him in the center of the chest making Negan shake his head when
she said it. “Now, I need to ask you this one. Since you’re being honest with me and all.”

“Oh no,” Negan sighed loudly, “you’re not going to drop this thing anytime soon, are you?”

“I can’t! It’s too good,” she teased him, drawing lines over the center of his chest while he stared
down at her waiting for her next flippant response. “Which one was better?”

“No,” Negan immediately blurt out making her laugh when he did it. “Absolutely not. I am not
answering that one. It’s already weird enough.”
 “I thought you were being honest with me,” she mused with a wicked giggle making him roll his
eyes. “I’m just saying, there had to be one of them that really stuck with you. Maybe Elaina
because it happened twice?”

Negan was glaring out at her, his face lacking any emotion at all while she continued to tease him,
“Then again, you married Lucille and not Elaina so it probably wasn’t that good.”

“That would really upset her if she heard that,” Negan reached up to cover his own lips with his
index finger as if to hint to her that she should knock it off. “That kind of thing upsets people.”

“Not when she’s married to a smoking hot woman,” she debated back making Negan smirk when
she said it. “My money is on Jane. All that pent up ager. Hate sex. Angry sex. It was Jane.”

“Stop it,” Negan chuckled, kept trying to get her to stop but she continued to ramble on. “I don’t
need them to have my balls in a vice grip any more than they already have them. If they found out
we were talking about this, they would be so pissed at me.”

“I’m not going to say anything about it. I promise you, I’m just trying to lighten the mood and get
you to stop worrying so much. I guess I’m being juvenile and stupid, but I’ve made you laugh a
few times. So…” she reached up to hook her arms around the back of Negan’s neck causing her to
tip up on her toes. “Worth it?”

“You’re something else,” Negan slurred, his arms hooking loosely around her waist when she
bobbed her head about. “But I am so glad that you are in my life. You balance everything out.”

“I’ve been a bit complicated at times,” she admitted with a sigh knowing that Negan still probably
deserved someone better than her. “It’s good to know that you’re a bit of a mess like me though. I
still think you deserve better than someone like me. Even after all the mess you just described to
me.”

“No, you’re too good for me,” he insisted with a wink, lowering down far enough to meet her in a
kiss that had her tipping up on her toes further for. The sound of the door being pushed open was
heard and they quickly separated to see that Jane was standing there. Of course the first thing
Negan was going to do right now was panic. “Jane?”

“Sam is asking to see you,” Jane informed Negan with a sigh. There was visible tension in Jane’s
face. It was understandable why. With her daughter injured, it was obvious Jane was just trying to
hold it all together.

“Go ahead,” Y/N nodded toward the hospital knowing that it was important for Negan to go.
Especially if Jane and Elaina were coming to get him specifically for it. “I’ll be in the hallway
waiting for you. I promise you, I’m not going anywhere.”

“Thank you,” Negan sighed squeezing her hand in his. Leading her toward the door where Jane
was waiting for them, Negan allowed Jane to go first and trailed her not far behind on the walk
back to Sam’s hospital room. Y/N could tell that Negan was super anxious about everything. She
didn’t blame him. Sam finally knew that he was her real dad and she found out in kind of a messed-
up fashion. Plus, Negan was going to have to deal with Jane and Elaina. It was complex to say the
least. “Are you sure you’re okay with this?”

Negan was staring out at Jane while they were in the elevator. It was Negan’s way of trying to be
polite, but Jane looked wrecked. This was a hard day for her. This was a hard day for everyone.
Jane simply nodded, lowered her head and cleared her throat, “It’s what Sam wants. So it’s what I
want.”
“Thank you,” Negan swallowed down, his eyes surveying her over long enough so that she met his
expression. When the elevator opened, Negan walked out and headed for Sam’s room. When they
got there the door was open. Inside they could see that Sam was talking to Elaina about things.
They were quiet enough that not everyone could hear. Negan looked back over his shoulder at Y/N
for some kind of confirmation that things were going to be okay. With a nod toward Sam’s room,
she knew that dragging it out would only make things worse. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” she whispered while Negan backstepped into the room with the two of them.

Standing just close enough to the entrance of the door, she could tell that Elaina was anxious when
she looked back over her shoulder to see that Negan was there. Negan approached the bottom of
the bed, his fingers reaching out to drag over the mattress and he cleared his throat.

“I’ll be right outside if you need me baby,” Elaina stammered, leaning forward to press a kiss over
Sam’s temple. When Elaina stood, she took a moment and Y/N knew that she was uneasy leaving
Negan alone with Sam. Instead of letting her worries get in the way, Elaina headed for the door and
Y/N stepped aside to allow her room to get out of the room.

Standing just far enough back to still see through the small window when Elaina closed the door,
Y/N could see that Negan was standing at the bottom of Sam’s bed with tears in his eyes and Sam
was crying. Sam was saying something to him that she couldn’t quite make out, but Negan moved
around the bed and sat down on the side of it. Sam sat up to the best of her ability to wrap her arm
around Negan’s shoulder to hug him and Y/N felt her heart hammering inside of her chest. That
was the kind of reaction she was hoping to see with the two.

Stepping back and away from the door, she cleared her throat knowing that she was left alone with
Sam’s mothers. Maybe she didn’t belong there, but Y/N loved both Sam and Negan, so it didn’t
really matter at this point. Finally meeting Elaina’s stare she could see that both Elaina and Jane
were trying to read the situation.

“Did he tell you?” Jane muttered, finally breaking the ice between all of them. At least Jane was
straight to the point instead of beating around the bush.

“Yeah,” Y/N shrugged her shoulders not wanting to make much out of the situation considering
where they were at and what happened.

“How much?” Jane tipped her head to the side making Y/N swallow down hard.

“I would think all of it. Just not in excruciating details,” Y/N was honest with them because there
was no sense in lying to them. “But I think I got everything in.”

“Listen, I know that it’s complicated,” Elaina stepped forward, her green eyes trying to apologize
for something that Y/N didn’t quite understand, “but this was long before you were ever in
Negan’s life and…”

“I don’t care what Negan did with you. I don’t care what Negan did with her either,” Y/N nodded
toward Jane making both of them uncomfortable when she brought up obviously the part where
Negan had slept with both of them. “This was all before my time and it’s none of my business. In
fact, none of it is my business. So none of you have to do explaining to me. The only thing I care
about is Sam.”

“Wow,” Jane spoke up making Y/N tip her head to the side when she gave her attention back to
Elaina’s gorgeous wife. “Not many people would be as comfortable with things as you’re being. I
expected something else being alone with you out here.”
“I don’t like what you both did to Sam and Negan. I could go off on that, but once again…it’s not
really my business,” Y/N maintained, placing her hand over the center of her chest while she spoke.
“I think everything could have been done where you all felt just as important. Writing Negan
completely out of Sam’s life when Negan loved Sam just doesn’t seem like the right way to go. But
that was a long time ago and you can’t change what you’ve done. I don’t blame any of you for how
you felt. Children makes things complicated, you know? And Jane you are just as important in
Sam’s life so…I shouldn’t even be rambling right now.”

“I know I can’t explain it in a way where it makes my side of things sound right,” Jane went to
defend her actions that she knew Y/N now was aware of. “I know Negan hates me for what I
did…”

“Negan doesn’t hate you. I just think he thinks you hate him and if you do, that’s you’re right,”
Y/N moved away from the door just enough to make sure that Sam wouldn’t be able to hear them
through the door. Jane’s face flooded with a sense of overwhelming emotions and she reached up
to rub at the back of her neck in a stressful manner. “I know it has to be uncomfortable having me
here because I’m someone you really don’t know.”

“That’s not entirely the case,” Jane responded, her chocolate brown eyes lowering down to look at
the floor. “Sam talked about you a lot. So I may not have met you, but I know a lot about you
through our daughter.”

“Well, all good things I hope,” Y/N smirked knowing that the little girl that was in that room with
Negan meant everything to her. “I’ve been very lucky to get to know Sam. The two of you did an
incredible job raising her. Sam made me realize a lot of things about myself that I didn’t even
know I felt. She’s witty, she’s smart and she is just overall incredible. I also know that she means
everything to Negan.”

“And you’re definitely marrying Negan?” Jane dug further making Y/N clear her throat and nod.
“Then it’s good to know that you’re someone that actually likes our daughter.”

“As long as you plan to still let her be around Negan,” Y/N knew that this had become a severely
complicated situation since they had fought so hard to keep the fact that Negan was Sam’s father
hidden from her. “I don’t know what the two of you plan to do now that Sam knows that Negan is
her father.”

“We couldn’t take Negan away from her,” Elaina finally muttered, her green eyes still red from all
the crying that she had been doing. “At this point it’s really up to Sam because she’s old enough to
know what’s good for her.”

“And you both feel this way?” Y/N looked between the two of them knowing that she agreed that
was a good idea, but she didn’t know if that would upset Jane. Both Elaina and Y/N were focused
on Jane making Jane shift awkwardly before them.

“Yeah. It’s something I’ll have to get used to, but yes. I want what’s best for Sam,” Jane agreed
with them, folding her arms out in front of her chest. “So that means that you would be okay with
whatever happens? You’re new in Negan’s life. Taking on a child in your life when you are
starting a relationship with someone…”

“I already accepted Sam into my life,” Y/N interrupted them knowing that while she appreciated
the thought, it wasn’t even one of the things that entered her mind. “In fact I think Sam is part of
the reason that I love Negan as much as I do. I never thought I wanted a family until I got to spend
time with Sam. Which of course doesn’t mean that I’m expecting to be Sam’s mother or anything
of the sort, but it’s just nice to have the opportunity to be part of Sam’s life.”
“And we’re happy that Sam really seems to like you and Negan has finally found happiness with
someone,” Elaina spoke up, folding her arms in front of her chest while she took a glance at the
door. Undoubtedly, they both were wondering what was happening with Sam and Negan, but they
were doing the best to give them alone time.

“I’m going to go get some coffee for us. Would you like some?” Jane directed her comment at Y/N
who shook her head knowing that while she appreciated the gesture, she didn’t want them spending
their money on her.

“Thank you though,” Y/N gave a tiny grin watching Jane give Elaina a small kiss before walking
off down the hallway. It left Elaina and Y/N alone making a certain thing that Negan had told her
run through her mind. “Can I ask you something and not have you get upset with me?”

“I don’t see why not,” Elaina shrugged her shoulders, turning toward Y/N while they kept their
voices quiet enough.

“Negan told me that you had a crush on him when you were younger,” Y/N started making the
color from Elaina’s features drain from her face when she brought it up. “Seeing your sister get
with the guy that you had a crush on had to be really hard. It probably left you with some feelings
toward Negan and what I’m asking is…are there still feelings there for you?”

“I love my wife Y/N. Jane has my heart,” Elaina assured Y/N with a shake of her head. “I did really
have a crush on Negan in my younger years. It was a childhood crush though. Jane is the first and
last person I have ever felt love toward. What happened with Negan and I after Lucille died, that
was a mistake where we were both lost in a moment. In fact, both times it was a mistake. I don’t
want you to worry about the idea of me because it’s never happening again. I’ll always be close to
Negan because of him giving me the best thing I’ve ever had in my life, but I love Negan. I’m just
not in love with Negan.”

“Okay,” Y/N believed everything Elaina said to her. In a weak attempt to lighten the moment, she
smirked and shrugged her shoulders. “I mean if you want to go that route, your wife is incredibly
hot and…”

“Oh God, you’re definitely meant to be with Negan,” Elaina rolled her eyes, letting out a laugh that
made her cheeks flush over. It made Y/N snort upon hearing it and Elaina leaned back against the
wall. “You’re right though. Jane is beautiful. I’m incredibly lucky to have her. She and Sam are
everything to me.”

“I’m glad to hear that,” Y/N reached out to place her hand in over Elaina’s shoulder to give it a
supportive squeeze. “I think they both feel the same way about you.”

“I hope so,” Elaina gave a weak smile before sighing loudly.

Not wanting to put herself too much into things to upset the flow of things, Y/N had sat down to
allow Elaina and Jane some space to talk things out without feeling the pressures of having to
worry about her there. If she had to wait things out, she had absolutely no problem with that.

The world felt like it was spinning around Negan while Sam was crying against the center of his
chest. It broke him to know that his daughter was having this kind of reaction to everything that she
found out. Placing a loving kiss over the top of her head, Negan wished that he could take all of
this pain away. Keeping his arms around her was all he cared to do in this world.

“I love you so much,” Negan breathed out hating that someone hurt his baby girl like this. There
were still so many fears circling in his head about all of this. It was good that Sam was awake, but
he was still worried about the aftermath. Worrying was probably too much, but he couldn’t help it.
Sam was his daughter and he wanted to make sure that he did everything he could to protect her.
Having her hurt and in this hospital bed made him feel like a failure as a father. Hell, who was he
kidding? He did feel like a failure to begin with when it came to Sam.

“I love you too,” Sam placed her hand in over the center of Negan’s chest to have the strength to
pull herself back from his arms carefully. Negan loosened his grasp on her to lower his burning
eyes from the tears that he had cried. When Negan saw the tears over Sam’s face, he reached out to
swipe his thumbs in over her cheekbones to collect the tears. “I don’t understand why you wouldn’t
have just told me everything.”

“I don’t know what to say because I don’t want your moms upset with me,” Negan stammered
trying to find the right words to say. Sam frowned, reaching up to grab a hold of one of Negan’s
hands with her good hand to hook her fingers with his. “I thought I was doing what was right.”

“My mom told me what happened,” Sam nodded her head, swallowing down hard while Negan
lowered his eyes ashamed of what he had done.

“I don’t know what Elaina told you…” Negan gulped down and Sam immediately stopped him.

“Jane. That mom told me,” Sam explained shocking Negan to hear that. “I asked her about it and
she told me that she made you sign over your rights to being my father after I apparently ran away.
I just want to hear it from you. Didn’t you like being my dad?”

“Being your dad was everything to me,” Negan stated with a hurt sound hating that Sam may have
thought that he didn’t want to be her father because that was so far from the case. “The first six
years of your life, you were my shadow Sam. We did everything together. You were on my hip like
glue. Everyone, well…most everyone thought it was adorable how we were together. The best
thing I ever did with my life was you Sam.”

“Then why did you let her make you do that?” Sam searched for answers which made a lump
develop in Negan’s throat. The last thing he wanted to do was throw anyone else under the bus for
this. “We’ve talked about my father so many times, but…”

“Sam, you liked being with me so much that you tried to leave your moms to be with me. You got
hurt and when a parent sees their child hurt, they get scared,” Negan thought back to the day that
he signed over his rights and he wished like hell that he never did. “I was scared that being in your
life as your father was going to continue to hurt you. That you were going to get hurt worse one day
trying to find your way back to me. I don’t blame your mothers for being scared and wanting to
keep you safe. We were all scared and we made some really shitty decisions, but Sam…being your
father is the best part of my whole life. I wish I could go back and stop myself from doing it, but I
was doing what I thought I had to do in order…”

Negan’s words started to break when his tears started flowing again against his attempts to be
strong in front of Sam. His bottom lip was trembling while Sam stared up at him with her big,
green eyes, “I just wanted to keep you safe Sam. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.
If I lost you…if I lost you and it was my fault, I would have never been able to forgive myself.”

“I’ve always felt connected to you and now I understand why,” Sam confessed reaching out to curl
her uninjured arm around Negan’s shoulders to pull him close for a hug again. “I think I knew it. I
just…I don’t know. I forgot along the way somehow.”

“You’re not mad at me?” Negan whimpered burying his head against the side of Sam’s neck while
he stroked his fingers through her blonde hair. That was his biggest fear. Having Sam hate him and
never talk to him again because of this.

“Why would I be mad at you?” Sam sniffled herself after they both had shared a decent amount of
tears between them. “You’re my dad. You were always there for me. I don’t know what happened
between you and my moms, but I love you. And I’ve always loved you. Plus, you saved my life. I
heard it was a lot of blood.”

“I’d give up all of it in order to keep you safe,” Negan pulled back enough to palm his hand in over
the side of Sam’s face, resting his forehead against his daughter’s. “I was terrified coming to the
hospital today. I don’t…I can’t…lose you. I just started thinking about every moment I shared with
you as a baby. All the years that I missed out on. I don’t want to miss out on anything anymore with
you Sam. I want to be in your life as much as possible.”

“I’d like that,” she smiled weakly knowing that he meant it by the way he was reacting. “I want
that too.”

“I don’t know what your mothers are going to allow, but I need you to know that I never stopped
being your dad,” Negan brushed her hair back behind her ear while he spoke to her, “I have always
been there, I just couldn’t use that term.”

“Well, we’re going to have to change that,” she let out an exhausted breath, reaching for Negan’s
hand to squeeze at it again. “Right, dad?”

“Are you sure?” Negan muttered knowing that he didn’t want Sam to feel forced to call him that.
“If you want to still call me Negan…”

“It feels weird calling you that after knowing the truth,” she slid back enough in the bed, showing
that she was drained from all the things that had been going on. Making enough room in the bed,
she pat it with her good arm hinting that she wanted him there with her. “Please lay with me.”

“Baby girl, you are hurt and I don’t want to squish you with my big ass,” Negan blurt out making
her laugh when he said. It made a tiny grin tug at his lips when she shook her head, not accepting
his answer. “Your moms are going to kill me if I hurt you.”

“You won’t hurt me,” she insisted with Negan cautiously crawling into the bed with her,
outstretching his arm so he could wrap it around her shoulders while she cuddled into him. After
they got comfortable together, Sam finally spoke up with a sigh, “Why did you have to give me one
of the rarest blood types?”

“Well, you can blame your grandfather for that one,” Negan snickered nuzzling his nose against
the side of her head. “Plus, it was a fifty-fifty shot that you were either going to get mine or your
mother’s blood type. I’m sorry you ended up with mine.”

“It’s okay, it just means that we’re special,” she stated with a yawn making Negan realize that she
was likely going to fall asleep in his arms. In his mind, it was the greatest thing ever getting to have
this moment with her, but he didn’t know how Elaina and Jane would feel about it. Especially after
everything.

“You want me to call your moms back in here?” Negan whispered looking down to see that her
eyes were already closed showing that she had gotten comfortable with him there.

“Just give us a few more minutes alone together,” she answered him keeping her eyes closed while
speaking. “I think we deserve it.”
From here on out, Negan just hoped and prayed that Sam’s mothers would allow him to spend
more time with her now that Sam knew the truth. Almost losing Sam tonight proved to Negan that
he no longer wanted to waste any more of his life with his daughter. Negan had already lost so
much and he didn’t want to lose any more than he already had. Life was short. Negan had lost
enough as it was and he wasn’t going to let life pass him by. Not anymore.
 Chapter 15
Chapter Summary

After Sam learned that Negan was her father, Jane and Elaina are finally allowing
Negan to be part of his daughter's life. The only thing keeping him from a happy future
is when new information arises about the person who hurt Sam.

Chapter Notes

I said I would have this up days ago, but life has been rough and it's been really hard
editing this chapter for me. I don't know why.

This chapter mentions suicide and talks about death pretty significantly, so I want to
warn people about that just to prepare yourself.

Edit: Also, if you read this please consider commenting. I'm seriously considering not
writing anymore with the lack of comments. I see that I'm getting hits, but no
comments whatsoever. And that's very disheartening. Even a heart or a thumbs up
would be appreciated. A lot of people asked me to continue this story and it's sad I've
gotten little to no comments on it.

“Damn it dad. Why are you cheating even if I only have one arm?” Sam let out a grunt of
frustration from where she was seated in front of the television in the living room with Negan. In
the background Elaina and Jane were bringing some boxes into Negan’s home. After the accident,
Elaina and Jane realized that Sam’s happiness was most important. They decided that if it made
Sam happy spending more time with Negan, they would allow her to get the opportunity to finally
experience what it was like to have a father. That meant that she was officially going to get a place
to stay at Negan’s home as well as getting to spend more time with Negan.

Y/N thought it was for the best to give Sam the room that Negan had originally made for Y/N to
persuade her to spend more time at his home before they started dating. When they find out that
Jane and Elaina were letting Sam have a place at his home, they moved Y/N’s things to the
basement which wasn’t all that bad. It gave her space to be alone when she needed it. Negan’s
basement was finished anyways so it wasn’t depressing or anything of the sort. It was a big
basement so it didn’t feel suffocating.

Part of the basement was an entertainment area that Negan decided to build when he learned about
the plans with Sam. It was crazy how fast he had built the area up, but he got nervous energy
knowing they were finally going to let him have this relationship with his daughter. When he first
did it, Y/N tried to urge him to take his time since Sam was in a cast and would be for a while, but
Negan was insistent upon buying things to make Sam happy. Which meant the entertainment area
was decked out with video game systems, a ping-pong table, a pool table and a few older arcade
games. Those were most likely for Negan and less for Sam.

Both Negan and Sam had a great relationship even before she found out that he was her father, but
now it seemed like the two of them were inseparable while they continued to bicker about the
game that they were playing together, “Your daughter has a broken arm and you’re still cheating to
win.”

“Just because I’m winning doesn’t mean that I’m cheating,” Negan defended himself with a snort
while the two of them continued to play together on the game console. Behind them on the couch
laying sprawled out watching them was Oliver. His expressive puppy eyes shifted over the screen
before he would glance between the two of them. Often, he would react to their outbursts with a tip
of his head adding to the cuteness of the whole interaction.

“You’re kidding, right?” Sam dropped the controller in frustration, her eyebrows furrowing when
she stared out at Negan with that same angry expression that Y/N had learned so quickly from
Negan. How she didn’t know Sam was always his was beyond her. When Sam dropped her game
controller, it made Oliver lift his head up, tipping it to the side making his ears flop about when he
barked. A huff fell from Oliver and Negan looked over his shoulder at their puppy, reaching back
to rub his fingers over Oliver’s head. “You’ve been throwing your hand up in front of my eyes!”

“No! I was just trying to show you something,” Negan defended himself with a snicker. Sam
reached out with her good arm to playfully hit him in the center of the chest making him burst out
in laughter.

“You know Negan, we could use some help moving some of Sam’s stuff into her room,” Y/N blurt
out when Elaina joined her at the front of the house. Negan’s big eyes lifted, an amused smirk
tugging at the corners of his lips. “You are supposed to be the muscle you know.”

“Yeah right,” Jane grunted when she stepped into the house with a few boxes underneath her arms.
“The children are making sure they are being children. While the real muscle actually does things.”

“Hey, I take offense to that,” Sam called out from where she was seated on the floor with Negan, “I
am way more mature than dad is. That’s an insult to me.”

“That was cold,” Negan reached out to brush his fingers through Sam’s hair before pulling her in
close to him so he could press a kiss over her temple. “Dad has to go help move the bigger things.
We’ll play later, okay?”

“Okay,” Sam gave Negan a weak smile before Negan pulled himself up from the floor with a
groan. Negan headed outside to go grab some of the things from the car. Ultimately, Sam didn’t
have to bring anything big because Negan already had the bed and got some things for her. They
officially moved Y/N into his bedroom since they were already engaged anyways. It just made
sense to do something like that.

Heading into Sam’s bedroom, Y/N set the oversized box that she had on the bed before Jane and
Elaina followed her in not far behind. Dodging between legs, Oliver weaved between everyone to
follow them into the bedroom. Taking a big leap, Oliver managed to just barely land on the edge of
the bed to watch them closely. When they set down their boxes, they all took a moment to catch
their breath and Elaina moved out to give attention to Oliver who was eager to get someone to
scratch behind his ears, “So you two are sure that you are okay with this?”

“Well, it’s something that Sam wants. She’ll be with us most of the time, but we’re okay with Sam
coming over here. Especially on days where we are away or just very busy. It just makes sense,”
Jane reasoned their decision out loud making Y/N smirk. Initially, Y/N thought there would be
more trouble from Sam learning that Negan was her father, but everyone was taking everything
pretty smoothly. In a way, it seemed to really bring Negan and Sam’s mothers closer together as
opposed to what Y/N thought would happen. “At least we know she will be safe here and that she
will have stuff to make her comfortable. With us working as much as we do, it’s probably good for
her.”

“Are we talking about me again?” Sam moved into the room catching all three of the women’s
attention. Sam always had a way of coming in at certain times to make sure that things weren’t
uncomfortable with her mothers and Negan. Here she was doing it again and it was very sweet of
her. “You know I’m perfectly okay, right? You don’t have to act like I’m on death’s door. I just
have a broken arm. I’m gonna be okay.”

“We know that sweetheart,” Jane reached out to wrap her arms around her daughter from behind.
They were more so talking about the idea of Sam being with Negan knowing that Negan was her
father. “We just want you happy and that’s all we’re trying to focus on with this.”

It was good that Elaina and Jane decided that they were okay with letting this bond grow between
Negan and Sam now that she knew officially that Negan was her dad. With how attached Sam
already was to Negan and how well she handled him being her father, Y/N was certain there would
have been a lot of tension between Sam and her mothers if they didn’t let her relationship with
Negan grow. So, this was probably being done so that didn’t happen along with just wanting to
make Sam content.

“Yes, we definitely want you happy kiddo. But we still need to be careful with things when it
comes to your arm. It wasn’t just a simple break Sam,” Elaina reminded her daughter knowing that
the doctor side of her was coming out. Elaina needed to stress that Sam still needed to take things
easily. If it was just a break, things wouldn’t have been as tense as they were to begin with. “We
just need to watch over you the next few weeks.”

“I know,” Sam held her good hand out, waving it in the air to get Elaina to relax. Heading over to
the bed that still had a bit of room at the top of it, Sam dropped down on the bed and laid back on it
letting out a sigh. Oliver swiftly hopped up on the bed and jumped over the boxes to cuddle in next
to Sam who giggled when the golden retriever eagerly kissed at the side of her face. “Olly, thank
you. The kisses are very nice,” Sam played with the puppy who was happy to show her all the love
he could before finally relaxing and laying in over the center of her chest as if to keep her safe. “I
just appreciate all the effort that everyone has taken in order to make me happy. All of you. It’s a
nice gesture.”

“You’re worth it kiddo,” Y/N reached out to rub at Oliver’s ears glad to see that he bonded so well
with Sam. The sound of footsteps heading for the room was heard making her look over her
shoulder. When Negan entered the bedroom, he let out a dramatic sound seeing that all of them
were standing around.

“Now who is being lazy?” Negan teased with a chuckle hearing the groan of Y/N. After setting the
large box he was carrying down, Negan reached out to touch Y/N’s shoulder to get her attention.
“Honey, come help me with this next thing. It’s not heavy, but it’s something that we need two sets
of hands to bring in.”

“I’ve got it,” Jane offered stepping forward surprising Negan with the fact that she was willing to
help him. It was nice that after everything happened, the animosity that was between Jane and
Negan seemed to die down. For once they were both thinking about Sam instead of focusing on
themselves. It was a pleasant surprise.

“I’ll meet you outside then,” Negan playfully bumped her with his shoulder making Jane groan
when he did it. Negan made his way out of the room while Jane took her time to pull her hair up
and out of her face. When Jane headed out, Y/N noticed the way that Sam was smiling when Jane
and Negan were able to tolerate each other for more than a few days.
“I guess I should see if they need help,” Elaina pointed toward the door and Sam threw her good
hand up in the air. As Elaina’s mother moved out of the room and left the two of them alone, Y/N
moved onto the bed beside Sam carefully. Oliver made an excited sound when he realized that they
would both be sitting with him. Laying back, Y/N watched Oliver wiggle enough to be able to lay
between the both of them.

“Hey,” Sam turned her head and smiled happily when Y/N gave her wink. “How do you feel about
everything?”

“What do you mean?” Y/N turned onto her side and reached out for Sam’s good hand to hook her
fingers with Sam’s which allowed Oliver to be cuddled in underneath them. It made Sam smirk and
her green eyes were locked with Y/N’s. “You moving in here? Heck, you’re more fun than your
dad, so I’m excited that we get to have you around more often. The two of us, we’re going to have
so many girls nights together.”

“I mean you’re marrying my dad. Now that you know he’s my dad, are you okay with
everything?” Sam seemed nervous asking Y/N that question. The expression that Sam made was
very similar to the one that Negan made when he thought that Y/N may have been leaving him
after everything. “I mean now you’ll be my step-mother.”

“I have a secret to tell you,” Y/N leaned in closer to Sam so she could hear her whisper, a tiny
smile pressing in over her lips. “You’re my best friend Sam.”

“Yeah?” Sam inquired, a nervous smile starting to show from behind her fears.

“Yeah,” Y/N nodded, leaning in closer to cuddle her head in against Sam’s. “I felt that way long
before I found out you were Negan’s daughter. You were always family from the first moment I
opened that front door to see you standing there. I love spending time with you. I have a ton of fun
when we are with you Sam. I guess I should be asking you if you are okay with me marrying your
dad.”

“Well, duh. I’m kind of the person that pushed the two of you together,” Sam reminded her with a
faint laugh while Sam worked to get herself up into a sitting position. Even though Sam was a
determined young girl, Y/N adjusted her body to help Sam sit up since she only had the use of her
one arm. Oliver wiggled between the two of them and quickly shifted to the end of the bed to
watch the two of them after he thought he might get crushed between them. “I want to give you
something.”

“You don’t have to give me anything,” Y/N assured her with a shake of her head knowing that
while she appreciated the gesture, she didn’t want Sam to give up anything for her. Sam waved her
hand to dismiss the thought of that before flipping the top of a box off and onto the floor. It took
Sam a while to dig around in the box before finding what she was looking for. When Sam lifted it
to Y/N’s sight it made her let out an awe sound. “This is for me?”

“I would put it on you if I could use both of my hands,” Sam held out the friendship she had made
for Y/N herself that was made of string. It was something simple, but she had done it before she
had gotten hurt and never got the chance to give it to Y/N. “It was supposed to be your engagement
gift that I made for you. You were supposed to get it after Negan asked you to marry him, I just
forgot it then and I kept forgetting it. I really like you Y/N and I’m glad that you get to be with my
dad. I couldn’t have picked out someone better for him.”

“You’re so sweet. You know that?” Y/N accepted the bracelet and reached out to wrap her arms
around Sam’s shoulders to carefully hug her in her arms. “I know things moved pretty fast for your
dad and I, but…I think you brought us together Sam. You made me realize I want a family. You
scared the hell out of us when we thought something happened with you. I can’t imagine a life
without Sam now that you’ve made a place in my heart.”

“You turned out so much better than I thought you were going to be the first day I met you,” Sam
pulled back enough to stare up at Y/N with her damp green eyes. It was visible that Y/N’s words
had effected Sam in an emotional way. “I’m glad that my dad found you.”

“Me too,” Y/N reached out to curl her fingers around Sam’s neck to bring her closer. Pressing a
kiss over Sam’s forehead, Y/N knew that she already felt closer to this family than she ever had her
own. With her parents, Y/N always felt like an outsider. With Negan and Sam, she felt like she
found a place where she belonged. It was a feeling she never had before. Because of them she had
been experiencing love she never had before and she’d be lost without them. “You’re the best.”

“So are you,” Sam watched Y/N struggle to put the friendship bracelet on her wrist before finally
getting it up over her hand onto her wrist. “Do you like it?”

“Of course I do. I’m never taking it off,” Y/N promised giving Sam a wink hearing the happy
breath that followed. Sam did her best to lean in to hug Y/N again when the sound of Negan
clearing his throat had them lifting their heads up toward the door. Negan was leaning against the
doorframe, his arms folded out in front of his chest. It was evident by the smile that he had on his
face that he had obviously been there for a while hearing their conversation. “Hey there
handsome.”

“I’m so glad to see my two girls bonding,” Negan moved into the room toward the bed. Pressing
his hands in over the bed, he balanced his weight and leaned down to press a kiss over Sam’s
temple letting it linger. When he pulled back enough to meet Y/N’s stare she could see that he was
in awe of her. Lifting her head just enough, she met Negan in a quick peck. “We have a few more
things that we have to get out of the car, but then how about we make some dinner?”

“How about we just order some pizza? I’m dying for just a really greasy pepperoni with extra
cheese right now,” Sam begged with a curl of her lip making Negan smirk when she did it. “I know
my moms aren’t very big on it, but maybe you can convince them?”

“I’ll think about trying to convince them if you help guide Y/N to unbox things in here so we make
sure you’re moved in officially,” Negan rubbed his hands together letting out a long sigh. “I could
really use some good cheese bread though, so even if they say no, I’ll sneak you one.”

“Sounds good,” Sam used her good hand to push herself up from the bed and onto her feet. Before
he left, Negan stepped forward to wrap his daughter up in his arms to give her a big hug. While he
was doing it, he gave a wink to Y/N making her smirk. It was clear that Negan was just eating up
all this time with Sam and she Y/N didn’t blame him. He was happy that he finally got to be her
father out in the open. This was something that Negan always wanted, but it was wrongfully taken
away from him. So it wasn’t something that Y/N was going to impose on. Hell, Negan deserved
this. There was no doubt in her mind that Negan loved his daughter more than anything and Y/N
was okay with that. She liked seeing the interactions between Negan and Sam. When Negan finally
released Sam and went to head back to go help her mothers bring the rest of everything in, Sam
called out to him. “Hey dad?”

“Yeah kiddo?” Negan grabbed a hold of the doorframe, pulling himself back into the room. His big
eyes were locked with Sam’s when she gave him a smile that almost matched his own.

“I love you,” Sam responded back making Negan’s head bob when he heard it.

“I love you more,” Negan winked, tapping his hand against the doorframe before leaving them to
get to work with the boxes that were already in the room.

“Okay, so you sit on the bed and direct me with what you want me to do,” Y/N suggested knowing
that Sam only had her one hand so it made sense to do all the work for Sam. “What do we have
here that we need to get put away?”

“A lot of them are just clothes. You can open the boxes for me and I can put them into the drawers.
You know my mothers, they definitely already have them folded for me so it’s not like it’s going to
be much work,” Sam told Y/N what she already knew, pointing to certain boxes that were marked
clearly. They worked together to put away a lot of her clothes and other simples items. When Y/N
reached for another one of the bigger boxes, Sam held her good hand out. “You don’t have to open
that one…”

“Oh,” Y/N was already half opening the box and saw a bunch of stuffed animals that were inside
of the box making her smile. Reaching inside, she pulled out the stuffed rabbit that was on top of
the pile and gave a small smile. “Please don’t tell me you’re embarrassed to have this little guy.”

“I mean, some of my friends have given me shit for having stuffed animals at my age,” Sam
explained, stepping forward to reach for the rabbit that Y/N was holding onto. Pulling it in close to
her chest, Sam gave the worn-out rabbit a firm hug and sighed. “I’ve had Roger since I was a baby.
It’s kind of hard to give him up. I’m pretty sure dad and Lucille gave it to me. Roger is the one
thing I remember being a constant most of my life.”

“Hey, my bedroom back at home was full of them. There is nothing wrong with having these,”
Y/N assured Sam with a half-smile digging through the box. Oliver got up from where he was
seated, excited to see the stuffed animals that were inside the box. An entertained sound fell from
Y/N’s throat when Oliver grabbed one of the stuffed animals that was more his size to take it to the
edge of the bed to sit with it. “You’re certainly going to feel loved with all of these things in here.
We could bury you with love from all these stuffed animals. Which is a good thing you know.”

“I probably could drown you with all of them. That’s not the only box,” Sam pointed out, her
cheeks flushing over with red when she confessed that very thing to Y/N. “A lot of them are
important.”

“I doubt that you have that many,” Y/N snickered seeing the way that Sam’s eyebrows bounced up
with amusement. “Not that there is anything wrong with it. Before I moved here Sam, you really
should have seen my bedroom.”

“Lay down. Watch this,” Sam urged Y/N to lay back on the bed and moved the box in her hands
carefully to dump the box on top of Y/N making her laugh out when she did it. Multiple stuffed
animals covered her when Sam reached for another bag that was on the floor to dump out another
set of stuffed animals over her. It made Y/N snicker when her face was soon covered by all of the
stuffed animals that Sam had. “I told you I could drown you with them.”

“You weren’t kidding,” Y/N reached for the single stuffed bear that was over her face to move it
so she could actually see Sam. “Do you have a favorite one?”

“Other than Roger? Yeah…” Sam set the bag down on top of the pile that was over Y/N. It was
close to Y/N’s face, but it wasn’t that big of a deal because she would be pulling herself out from
the pile. “Let me see if I can find him somewhere. I just have this thing where I have a hard time
getting rid of gifts. They are all special in their own way and…”

“Hey,” the sound of Negan’s voice filled the air and before Y/N could respond he was digging her
out from underneath the pile of the stuffed animals, swiftly pulling the bag away from her face.
Negan’s quickness had Oliver hopping down from the bed while carrying the stuffed animal in his
mouth when he headed toward the corner of the room. “What the hell were you doing?”

“Swimming with the stuffed animals?” Y/N teased, giving a playful smile when Negan made a
serious expression while staring out at the bag that he had nervously pulled away from her face. “I
wasn’t going to kill myself in front of your daughter Negan. Sam just set the bag there and…”

“Don’t say that,” Negan snapped at Y/N making her tense up. Negan’s jaw was clenched, his hazel
eyes narrowed while Y/N took in a sharp breath not sure why he was getting touchy about this
whole thing. “You could suffocate from that bag. It’s not funny to joke about.”

“I know it’s not funny to joke about, but a bag near my face is not going to kill me Negan. It wasn’t
even that close,” Y/N was confused how to respond with Negan overreacting. Sam turned on her
heel to look back at Negan who was seated on the edge of the bed with Y/N. “I promise you that if
I’m looking to put a bag over my head Negan, I’ll try to talk it out with you first, okay?”

“You’re not being comical,” Negan stood up from the bed, the bag still clasped tightly in his hand.
His dark eyes were full of something that she couldn’t quite read. “You shouldn’t joke about
killing yourself with a bag. People have done that.”

“Dad, she wasn’t doing that,” Sam tried to reason with Negan who held his hand up in the air to
silence Sam. Negan’s chest was rising and falling heavily while Y/N pulled herself to the edge of
the bed.

“I’m not joking. I’m sorry if it came off that way, I was just saying I would never do that,” Y/N
attempted to stand up to reach out to touch Negan, but he blocked her from coming near him
making her let out a confused sound. “Negan, what’s going on here? What did I do?”

Instead of giving her an answer, Negan stormed out of the room leaving both her and Sam jumbled
as to what happened. As Negan left, Elaina was moving into the room with a box and she picked
up on the tension, “What happened?”

“He just got really mad at Y/N. We were playing and I dumped all of my stuffed animals on top of
her to show her how many I had. I set a bag on top of the stuffed animals to go grab something,”
Sam explained looking between her mother and Y/N. Elaina carefully set the box down while
continuing to listen to her daughter. “Dad didn’t like that the bag was close to her face and thought
that she was joking that she would kill herself with the bag.”

“Oh,” Elaina let out a long lingering breath making Y/N realize that Sam’s explanation made
something click for Elaina like she knew why Negan was having a bad response to it. “Hey Sam, I
think your other mom might need some help finding the last few things. I’ll help Y/N put the rest
of your things away.”

“Sure,” Sam headed for the door whistling to get Oliver to follow her, giving Y/N’s arm a small
squeeze with her good hand before leaving her alone with Elaina.

“Listen, I promise you that I don’t find suicide funny. I swear, that wasn’t my intention. I just
didn’t understand why he was so upset,” Y/N explained in an uneven breath, but Elaina put her
hands up to silence Y/N so she didn’t have to explain herself. “He was really upset with me and I
just got uncomfortable, so I said things I shouldn’t have, but…”

“Take a seat,” Elaina urged Y/N moving for the door to close it making Y/N panic when she did
that. Well, shit. That wasn’t a good sign. Listening to Elaina, Y/N slowly lowered down to the bed
and grasped to the edge of the bed. When Elaina moved back toward the bed, her bright green eyes
lowered to look down at Y/N. “How much do you know about Lucille?”

“I don’t really know all that much. I don’t know how long she’s been gone. I know she had
pancreatic cancer…” Y/N started to list of the things she did know about Lucille considering
Negan wasn’t always entirely too open about his late wife. She wished she knew more about
Negan’s past, but it was only small bursts of information that Negan told her. Whenever he talked
about it, he would get exceedingly emotional so she tried to avoid doing that to him as much as
possible. “Then I know odds and ends.”

“But you don’t know how she died?” Elaina folded her arms out in front of her chest making Y/N
clear her throat upon hearing it.

“I just assumed she died from her cancer,” Y/N stated with a shrug of her shoulders making the
color drain from Elaina’s face when Y/N said that. “Did I miss something? I don’t understand what
is happening here.”

“Lucille hated the hospitals, but my sister was also stubborn as shit. She wanted to be in control of
her own life. She hated that she was just sitting around waiting to die,” Elaina moved across the
small space between them, a saddened breath falling from her parted lips when she took a seat next
to Y/N on the bed. “My sister knew that it was very unlikely that she would live. The numbers for
pancreatic cancer are so awful. It’s rare that anyone really lives from it.”

“I looked into it once Negan told me what she had,” Y/N explained knowing that she was trying to
understand the things that Negan went through with Lucille after she knew what Lucille had. Since
Negan wasn’t always open about what happened with Lucille, she knew that she wanted to do her
best to help him through things and the loss. “I know it’s pretty terrible.”

“Well, she had enough,” Elaina swallowed down hard, her bright eyes lifting to meet Y/N’s stare.
There were tears in Elaina’s eyes and Y/N felt her chest aching staring out at Elaina. “One day, my
sister asked Negan to go get them some ice cream. Her favorite kind. Of course Negan would do
anything for her, so it didn’t take much convincing and she knew that. While Negan was gone, she
took all of her pills and just in case that didn’t do the job, she wrapped a plastic bag around her
head. Tied it around the neck, so when Negan came back, he found my sister…”

“God,” Y/N exhaled loudly feeling suddenly extremely guilty as soon as Elaina had trouble getting
through the next bit of her story. Now everything made sense and Y/N started to feel like a total
asshole for this whole thing.

“She knew that Negan wouldn’t be okay with her killing herself. He had hope that the treatments
she was doing would work. He thought that she would be one of the few miracles. He would have
never been okay with her taking her own life. So she sent him away to give herself enough time to
do it,” Elaina recalled the letter that they had found after Lucille had taken her own life instead of
allowing the cancer to carry out any longer. “So you probably scared the hell out of him when he
came in here and saw you sitting on the bed with a bag near your face. He probably just didn’t
want to imagine you doing…doing what my sister did.”

“I’m so sorry that I made you explain that to me,” Y/N apologized knowing that it really had to
hurt to go back into such painful memories like that to explain what happened to Lucille. The
immense amount of guilt that she had having to put both Negan and Elaina back through those
memories made her feel like the worst person there was. Reaching out, she placed her hand over
Elaina’s shoulders and frowned. “Can I hug you?”

Elaina simply nodded when Y/N moved forward to wrap her arms around Elaina to hold her in her
arms. Negan wasn’t kidding when he told her that he had a lot of baggage in his life. There was a
lot of hurt that he had to suffer through. So much in fact that she didn’t know how Negan was still
standing after all of this.

“I guess I should go find him so I can apologize,” Y/N pulled back, giving Elaina one final
supportive squeeze. Standing up from the bed, she let out a shuddering breath. “I’m sorry you lost
her that way. I can’t imagine what that was like for either one of you.”

Elaina gave her a weak nod, reaching up to wipe away at the remainder of the tears that were over
her face. Y/N allowed her to have time to herself when she moved out of the bedroom. Stepping
out into the living room she saw that Sam and Jane were together in Negan’s living room giggling
together. Turning on her heel she could see that their bedroom door was opened. The door was
slightly opened and beyond it she could see that Negan was sitting on the edge of the bed with his
head hanging low.

This was going to be a hard one to approach. Walking to the bedroom, she pushed the door open
taking her time to make her presence known. Unhurriedly, Negan’s head raised, his hazel eyes
damp when she closed the door behind her. Standing before him, she felt her own heart breaking
seeing the way that he was looking up at her.

“Negan, I…I am so sorry,” she apologized knowing that his reaction made sense. Stepping
forward, she reached out to draw her fingers down over the side of his face making his eyes come
to a tight close. Cupping his face in her hands, she urged him to look up at her and when his eyes
opened, she could see that tears were burning at his eyes. “I didn’t know. I swear if I did, I
wouldn’t have been so nonchalant about the whole thing. You had every reason to react like you
did. I’m so sorry you lost her like that.”

“I just can’t lose you like that,” Negan whimpered when she moved in over him on her knees on
the bed to wrap him up in her arms. Hooking his arms loosely around her body, he rest his head
against her chest. With her fingers stroking through his hair, he tried to calm down, but he was
allowing his emotions to get the best of him. “I’m sorry, I know I shouldn’t still be effected by it,
but I can’t…”

“Please don’t apologize for having a heart Negan. You lost someone you loved, there is nothing to
apologize for,” she hushed him, kissing the top of his head when she felt his tears soaking at the
center of her shirt, but she didn’t care. Attempting to soothe him, she allowed him to fall apart in
her arms while stroking her fingers over his scalp. “You’ve gone through so much Negan and I
didn’t mean to add to your pain. I want to make your life better, not worse.”

“You do make my life better. That’s why…it’s why I got so upset,” Negan lifted his head, allowing
her to stroke away at the tears that were over his face. “I love you. I love you so much and I don’t
want to lose you.”

“I would never do that to you,” she promised him knowing that she couldn’t promise anything in
life, but she knew that she would never take her life like that. “I plan to be here with you as long as
possible. I want to experience all that I can with you because I’m not ready to lose you yet.”

Dipping down, she pressed a sweet, loving kiss over his lips knowing that she felt an incredible
amount of guilt eating away at her for what she had done. Even if it was a mistake, it was a big
moment in Negan’s life that she hadn’t really known about so therefore she didn’t take it seriously
or understand why he was so upset.

“I love you, so much,” she whispered against his lips, tasting the saltiness of his tears against her
kiss. Pressing her forehead to his, she knew that this was a man that had been through so much and
she wanted to spend her life trying to help him through the pain that he had been through. “You’re
everything to me.”

There was a knock on the door and she moved from over Negan’s lap to sit in beside him. The door
pushed open and Sam popped her head in to see if everything was okay. Negan was wiping at his
face with the back of his hand to try to hide the tears that were over his face from his daughter.
Feigning a smile, Negan did his best to put on a good face to keep his sadness hidden.

“How about that pizza and cheese bread?” Sam inquired and Negan nodded, his jaw flexing when
she asked him about what she had earlier. Right behind her was Oliver following her around like a
shadow while still holding onto that stuffed animal he had grabbed onto earlier. Oliver was
watching Negan like a hawk obviously better at picking up on the fact he was emotional.

“Sounds good kiddo. You can order whatever you want, okay?” Negan gave her the go ahead to
order the food. Sam’s smile expanded over her young features before leaving the two of them
alone together. Oliver still was at the door after Sam walked off and his ears perked up. Stepping
into the room slowly, the puppy took his time to make it over to Negan before hopping up to place
his front paws on Negan’s knees. Slowly releasing the stuffed animal, Oliver dropped the toy into
Negan’s lap. Nudging it with his nose, he tried to put it closer to Negan making a smile finally fall
in over Negan’s lips. “Thank you, buddy.”

“That’s a big deal, he’s been holding onto that for a while now,” Y/N pointed out noticing the way
that the puppy looked up at Negan while letting out a whimpering sound. Negan reached out to
caress both of Oliver’s ears making their puppy lean in closer to Negan. “This one has a big heart.”

“He does,” Negan agreed lowering down enough to press a kiss over Oliver’s head before nodding
toward the door. “Can you go watch Sam for me? Keep her safe?”

Oliver looked up at Negan with his big brown eyes and huffed, hopping up enough to lick at
Negan’s face making Negan grunt out. With a smirk, Negan watched as Oliver walked to the door
to head out to go find Sam like Negan asked of him.

When Oliver was gone, Negan shrugged his shoulders and cleared his throat. Grabbing the toy that
Oliver had given him, Negan grasped at it uneasily. “Sam doesn’t know about what happened to
Lucille. As far as she knows, Lucille passed away in her sleep. I think it’s too much for a kid to
know.”

She didn’t blame him for that. It made sense since Sam was so young and it was a really deep
subject to get into. Before Negan could go any further in their discussion, the sound of his phone
ringing was going off. Digging into his pocket, Negan managed to snake his cell phone out to look
at who was calling him. Something changed in his face when he quickly stood from the bed and
moved to the corner of the bedroom.

“Hey,” Negan muttered, glancing back over his shoulder at Y/N. The way Negan’s eyes darkened
made her heart skip a beat when he moved to the side of the bed to dig through to find a pad of
paper and pen out of the nightstand. Negan was writing something down that she couldn’t see
because he was standing in the way. “Are you sure? You’re absolutely certain it’s him?”

Standing up from the bed, Y/N was curious as to what the call was about that seemed to have
Negan as hyped as he was, “Now there is no mistaking that this is the person?”

“Negan?” she breathed reaching out to touch his shoulder when he ripped the paper from the pad
that he was using. Negan shoved it into his back pocket making her let out an intrigued breath.

“Thank you,” Negan hung up his cell phone and shoved the phone into his pocket. Negan turned to
face her with something different in his eyes. His pupils were dilated and Negan was breathing
heavily. “I have to go somewhere. Just make sure they get what they want with pizza.”

“Where are you going?” she watched him fumbling to grab the wallet from his pocket before
pulling it open. “Negan, what was that?”

“It doesn’t concern you,” Negan grumbled, his eyes lifting slightly from where they were looking
through his wallet. His eyebrows were furrowed and there was an anger that seemed to be
replacing the sadness that was there originally. Pulling the money out, he held his hand out for her
to take the money and she shook her head. “Take the money and do what I say.”

“Not until you tell me what that was,” she denied making him roll his eyes before tossing the
money on the bed. Negan pushed his wallet back into his pocket, attempting to move around Y/N,
but she wouldn’t allow him. “Talk to me.”

“It doesn’t matter,” Negan grabbed a hold of her hips firmly trying to still get around her, but she
was standing her ground. “Y/N, there are some things that you don’t need to know.”

“I’m your fiancée, which means that you should be telling me everything. We don’t hide anything
from each other,” she corrected him, reaching up to cup at the sides of his face in a firm grasp.
Negan looked like he was fighting a war inside of his head whether to let her know what was going
on or not. “I love you. We’re together. That means that we need to be open with each other about
things. I can see that this is big. Whatever just happened is a big deal to you.”

“I’ll tell you, but you’re not going to stop me from what I’m about to do,” Negan grunted making
her panic. A muscle in Negan’s jaw flexed when he slowly lowered his hands only to shove them
into his pockets. “I have a friend at the police station that owes me a few favors. I asked him if
there was any information discovered on what happened to Sam to send it my way. They looked at
the footage at the end of the block and saw the car. It had the damage done to it, it was the right
color and they were able to pull the license plate from another traffic camera. They are going to be
arresting the guy tonight.”

“That’s great news Negan,” she declared knowing that they thought the person who hurt Sam
would never be caught. But when she said that, she could tell by the look in Negan’s eyes that he
wasn’t satisfied with that. “What else did he give you Negan?”

“I’m not going to let some shithead get off easily with hurting my baby girl,” Negan scoffed
making her heart hammer in her chest when she realized where he was going with this whole thing.
“My friend gave me his address…”

“Negan, no…” she shook her head knowing what he was saying. “You have to let the police take
care of this. You have to…”

“I love you. More than anything,” Negan hushed her, reaching out to put a firm grasp over her arms
while he stared out at her. “But I don’t trust the police to do anything in terms of giving this
motherfucker what he actually deserves or getting him justice for almost killing my little girl.”

“You can’t take the law into your own hands Negan,” she tried to reason with him. This could only
lead to something bad happening. No matter how many people Negan knew or how much money
he had. With how angry he was, she knew that it would lead to the worst-case scenario. “They are
going to get him for what he did.”

“Keep an eye on them, okay?” Negan leaned down to press a kiss over her cheek making her gasp
after he managed to get around her and into the hallway. Following Negan closely behind, she saw
him head over to Sam to lean down to press a quick kiss over her forehead. “I love you baby girl.”

“Negan, stop…” Y/N ordered when he headed for the door at the other end of the room. “Negan
please…”

Ignoring her pleas, Negan left out the front door leaving her in a state of panic when he closed the
door behind him. Pulling the door open, she attempted to follow him to the car, but he was already
peeling out of the driveway before she could try to reason with him anymore.

“What was that?” Jane had followed Y/N outside and she looked back at Jane with an uneasy shake
of her head.

“Negan found out who it was that hurt Sam. Someone gave him the address of where the person
lived,” Y/N answered making Jane let out a tense exhale. Elaina was standing by the door and she
managed to hear what she said. “I don’t know what to do. I have to call someone…do
something…”

“Do you have that app on your phone that tells you where he is?” Elaina stammered trying to find a
way to help, but Y/N threw her hands up in the air.

“I’m his fiancée Elaina, not his parent,” Y/N explained in a frustrated grunt trying to think of how
to fix something that she was already so panicked about. “His friend called, he wrote the address
down on a pad of paper and then he took off. I don’t know who his friend was at the police station.
I don’t want to call the police on him because they could hurt him…but I don’t want him to kill
this guy because there is no coming back from that.”

“You said he wrote it down on a pad of paper? Where?” Jane prodded Y/N for information and she
pointed back inside the house. Jane urged Y/N to follow her and Y/N took Jane to the pad that
Negan left on the nightstand. Grabbing the pad, Jane walked out into the living room where Sam
was confused about what was going on. “Sam, baby, do you know where Negan keeps the
pencils?”

“Kitchen drawer,” Sam moved into the kitchen to grab a pencil for Jane who swiftly dropped the
pad onto the top of the counter. Jane started drawing the pencil over the top of the paper to show
through the scratches of pencil what Negan’s handwriting was. “What is that?”

“Elaina, watch Sam and get that pizza. I’m going to go with Y/N to make sure nothing bad
happens,” Jane didn’t even wait to hear Elaina’s response while Y/N followed Jane out to the car.
Jane tossed the pad of paper to Y/N and pointed at it. “You put in the address and I’ll drive like
hell.”

“Why are you doing this?” Y/N panted, doing exactly what Jane ordered of her getting the
directions on her phone and Jane did what she could to quickly follow the directions.

“Because while I want this man dead just as much as Negan does, it’s the last thing that Sam
needs,” Jane answered with an arch of her eyebrow. Jane seemed just as panicked about everything
as Y/N did. “Negan shouldn’t be put in jail for something that was someone else’s mistake. It was
my fault that this happened to Sam.”

“You know that it wasn’t,” Y/N reasoned with Jane hating that Jane still blamed herself for
everything that happened.

“It was. If I wouldn’t have gone inside, I would have been out there with her and told her to get out
of the street,” Jane was emotional while she spoke up about what happened to her daughter. “I
can’t let Negan take the fall for something that was my fault. Something that could have been
avoided if I would have just waited ten minutes. It wasn’t an emergency for work, I just wanted to
get it done ahead of time. This is my fault.”

There was tension in the air while they made their way to the address that Negan had written
down. Y/N just prayed that Negan hadn’t done anything yet that even he couldn’t get himself out
of. When they got to the address, she let out a sigh of relief when they saw that Negan was sitting
in his Mustang still seemingly waiting for some sign of the man that had hurt Sam. Jane parked
and Y/N got out of the car, heading over to Negan’s Mustang to pull open the door to the
passenger’s side of the car. Taking a seat inside she saw Negan’s surprised eyes staring out at her
when she shook her head.

“How the fuck are you here?” Negan snapped, his hazel eyes glaring out at her when she stared out
at him with her nervous eyes. Y/N held up the pad of paper that she had forgotten to leave in the
car and Negan snorted. “Well that was smart.”

“It wasn’t my idea. It was Jane that came up with it,” she looked back toward the car that was
behind them and Negan did the same to see that Jane was sitting there waiting. Tossing the notepad
into the back, her attention returned to Negan and she shook her head. “Neither one of us want you
to go through with something stupid like this. I don’t know what you are thinking Negan…”

“I’m thinking about how my daughter almost died. I’m thinking about how this son of a bitch left
her after he hit her to bleed out. How if they didn’t save my daughter, I could have lost her and she
would have never known that I was her father,” Negan whimpered, his bottom lip trembling. His
fingers curled around the wheel drawing attention to the way that it made his knuckles white with
how tight his grasp was. “So I figure that’s the least he deserves. To be left…bleeding…alone…”

“Negan, no,” she reached out to trace her fingers in over the side of his face to force him to look at
her. “Nothing will come from this. They will know it was you. They will find out it was you and
you could go to jail for it. Your life is heading in the right direction.”

“It would be worth it to see that fucker suffer for the things that he has done,” Negan reached up to
grab her hand, hooking his fingers with hers. Out of the corner of his eyes, Negan saw that a car
was returning to the home. Whatever pull she might have had over Negan didn’t last any longer
because now his focus was on the man that had hurt Sam without a care in the world. Negan’s eyes
were hooked on the house, his jaw flexing in anger when the man was getting out of his car and
heading for the house. “You and Jane need to go back home.”

“Negan, I’m begging you to think this one out,” she pleaded with him as Negan pushed open the
door and got out of his car. Negan slammed the door shut and she pulled herself out of the car.
Negan was at the opened trunk pulling a baseball bat out of the back of his car making her let out a
worried sound. “Beating this man with a bat is not going to make this better.”

“It depends in what manner you consider things being better,” Negan retorted grasping tightly to
the bat at his side. Lowering it, he pointed toward Jane’s car and noticed that Jane was starting to
get out when she saw the weapon that Negan had grabbed. “The both of you need to go home
because you’re not going to stop me from this. I’ve already made up my mind.”

“Negan, I know how angry you are,” Jane reached out to grab the opposite end of that bat, her eyes
connecting with Negan’s. His chest was falling and rising heavily showing just how worked up he
had already made him. “There isn’t a minute where I don’t wish the worst possible thing on that
man. Have I thought about doing it myself? Of course I have because he hurt our baby girl.”

“Then why do you want to stop me?” Negan shook his head still not understanding why they were
trying to stop him from bringing justice to the man that had hurt Sam. “You know that no matter
what happens, he’ll never truly get what he deserves.”

“We don’t make those kind of decisions Negan,” Jane replied back, her eyebrows expressive with
the sadness that was filling her body. “If you’re going to go after him for what he did to Sam, you
might as well start with me because it’s partially my mistake that it happened too.”

“You’re not the one that hit her,” Negan reminded Jane, looking to the door seeing that the lights
were now turned on inside of the home. “It’s not your fault that the motherfucker living inside of
that home left our daughter to die in the middle of the street.”

“But if I wouldn’t have left, it could have been avoided and potentially could have been stopped
before it even happened,” Jane claimed, drawing her hand further up the baseball bat trying to
appeal to Negan to get him to snap out of his mindset. “Where does justice begin and end Negan?
Because multiple people are at fault for this happening. Including myself. So, should you start with
me then because I left Sam?”

“It’s not the same,” tears were swelling up in Negan’s eyes when he yanked the baseball bat
forward from Jane’s grasp. “I know what you’re doing and I understand it. But it’s not going to
change how cold that man was in leaving a child there bleeding out in the middle of the street.
Children are innocent. If you hurt a child, you are the worst kind of scum in this world. He made a
conscious decision to leave Sam there. He could have helped her. Instead he left her there and for
that he’s a fucking monster that deserves what I’m going to do to him.”

“Negan,” Y/N watched Negan pull himself away from them and start to head up toward the yard of
the man that his targets were set on. Moving before Negan, she swiftly stood before him and
shoved her hands into the center of Negan’s chest to knock him back only slightly. Jane stepped
forward knowing that she had done her best, but now it was just about trying to convince Negan to
stop. “What happens, huh? You go in there and you do this? They take you away forever. Do you
know how much that would fuck up all of us? I didn’t want a relationship. I didn’t want to be with
someone and you made me fall in love with you. Call me selfish, but I can’t lose you. Not now.
You’re everything to me. If I don’t have you in my life…”

“Y/N, you are the strongest woman I have ever known. You were that way long before I ever met
you,” Negan grumbled underneath his breath, tensing up when she said those things. “I love you so
much, you have to know that, but you were probably better off before you met me. You had
goals…you had…”

“What I want is you,” she stepped forward, getting him to lower the baseball bat when she lovingly
reached out to stroke over the side of his face making his hazel eyes continue to mist over. “I want
to be a family with you and with Sam. I had the choice between you and my family and I picked
you. You and Sam opened me to what love really is. What family should be about. Don’t take that
away from me.”

“If I let him get away with hurting Sam,” Negan stammered, a tear sliding down the side of his
face as he spoke, “then what does that say about me as a father? I’m sorry Y/N, but this is
something that I have to do.”

“Then if you don’t do it for me, don’t do it for Sam,” she called out as he walked passed her
making Negan stop when she said that to look over his shoulder at her. “For so long you were
wrongfully kept from your daughter. Years you wished that you could be open with her and tell her
the truth. Now that you finally can be Sam’s father, you want to leave her?”

“Of course not,” Negan answered with a whimper, turning on his heel to face them again. “You
know that I love Sam. That’s why I’m here right now.”

“But what is Sam going to think when you have to go to prison for this? She just got you back into
her life the way you were always meant to be,” Y/N reminded him hoping that talking about his
daughter would get him to lower the offense on the man that had hurt Sam. “You’re going to
abandon her and let her lose you as a father again?”

Negan’s face twisted with emotions that showed he was both confused and broken. Y/N looked
back at Jane who stepped closer to them and she cleared her throat, “Sam is excited to finally have
her father back in her life. You just moved her into your home. You adopted a puppy for her.
You’re engaged. You have a family that needs you. A little girl that is depending on you at home.
Don’t ruin everything for this Negan. Your daughter is more important than the revenge that will
come from this…”

“Sam needs you,” Jane dug that in hearing Negan start to sob and when Jane noticed his grip
loosening on the bat that he was holding, she stepped even closer hoping that if she got the chance,
she could grab the weapon from him. “Sam has already lost Lucille. You have filled her with hope
and excitement for the future Negan. It’s the happiest I have ever seen Sam since Lucille passed
away. Don’t let her lose her father too.”

“I just want to keep her safe,” Negan declared with a tremor noticing that Y/N was stepping in
closer to him.

“Then take care of her. Be the father that you always wanted to be and keep her safe from here on
out,” Y/N suggested, cupping Negan’s face in her hands. Stroking her fingertips over the tear-
stained flesh, she tipped up to meet him in a small kiss trying to draw him to her. “Be the man you
always wanted to be. God finally gave you a second chance Negan. Don’t screw this one up all
over revenge. Revenge is a never-ending cycle that only hurts more and more people. So please…
drop the bat.”

Negan was shaking beneath her touch, tears running down his face before he finally dropped the
bat that was caught by Jane who moved away from the two of them. Pulling Negan into her arms,
she held him while he cried and stroked her fingers through his dark hair.

“We’re going to do everything we can to make that little girl happy and to keep her safe Negan,”
she assured him pressing a loving kiss over his cheek hating that this was able to break him apart
like it did. Reaching for his hands, she pulled him closer to his Mustang knowing that she wanted
to get him as far away from the home as possible. “If you want, we can sit here until the police get
here and take him away so you can see with your own eyes that he is going to be put away.”

“Okay,” Negan nodded, biting at his bottom lip when he looked to Jane who had already put his
baseball bat in her car. Reaching up, he tried to brush at the tears over his face knowing that he felt
pathetic that he was being this emotional. “I promise I won’t try to kill him. Just please go back
and tell the girls that everything is going to be okay.”

“You swear on Sam?” Jane confirmed with Negan who simply just nodded making her let out a
loud sigh. “Okay big guy, we’ll be waiting at your place.”

Jane moved forward to wrap her arms around Negan to embrace him in a hug that surprised him,
but Negan didn’t turn it away. Accepting the act of kindness from Jane, Negan lowered his head
down and hugged her tight. Of course the two of them would feel a stronger connection over this
and Y/N understood it. That was their daughter that got hurt. She was just relieved that they could
get Negan to calm down and agree to not hurting someone tonight.
When Jane left, they got into Negan’s car and they waited. For a while they were silent before
Negan finally cleared his throat and spoke up, “I’m sorry for scaring you.”

“I just couldn’t lose you,” she reached out to hook her fingers with his. Negan’s Adam’s apple
bounced in his throat showing that he was still stressed over the whole thing. “I know why you
wanted to do what you did Negan. It’s your daughter that he hurt. I understand your thought
process, but I just had to think about the bigger picture.”

“I do love you, you know that, right?” Negan inquired, his eyes looking for something in the way
that she was looking at him. Lifting her hand up to his mouth, he deposited a kiss over the back of
her hand and shrugged his shoulders. “You saved me in so many ways. I would be lost without you
too. I love you so fucking much.”

“I feel the same way,” she stated with a lump developing in her throat as she leaned forward to
meet his lips in soft, loving kiss. Stroking her fingers over the side of his face, she rest her forehead
against his and was glad that they had the bond that they did together. “I want to spend forever with
you Negan. I just want my future to be with you and Sam.”

“That’s what I want too,” Negan swallowed down hard, thinking about what she had said. “I think
we should get married.”

“Honey, we’re already engaged,” she snickered, looking down at her hand where the engagement
ring he had given her was. “You don’t have to ask me again to get me to marry you. I’ve already
said yes.”

“No, I mean we should get married as soon as possible,” Negan threw the idea out there, feeling
his heartbeat skip a beat when her face flashed over with surprise. “I mean you don’t have to if you
don’t want to, but why wait? You don’t want a big wedding. You want something personal. Let’s
just fill out the paperwork and get married. There is no reason to wait this thing out. I want to be
with you for the rest of my life and you said the same thing about me. Let’s just do this thing and
get married.”

“Is that really what you want?” she tipped her head to the side and thought about what he was
putting out on the table for her. Getting married as soon as possible would certainly make the stress
of it all less. She wouldn’t have to worry about her college courses getting in the way of their
wedding. They were already in the summer and she wouldn’t be returning until the next semester
started.

“Of course it is,” Negan blurt out, his eyes full of awe for the woman before him. “You would do
anything for me and I for you. I know that I love you and I know that I want to be yours for the rest
of the life that I have. So let’s fill out the paperwork tomorrow and then get married. I already have
everything I want.”

“Okay,” she agreed to what he was offering knowing that it wouldn’t bother her. He was right. She
wasn’t someone that wanted a big wedding. She wasn’t a person that wanted big public displays
for everyone to be able to judge her. It was no one else’s business and she was certain that people
would get upset with her for falling as fast as she did. But she didn’t care because Negan was
everything to her. “I think that’s a great idea.”

Before they could finish their discussion, she saw multiple police cars approaching the home they
had been watching. Like she had promised, they stayed to see the police approaching the home.
When the police finally took the man out of the home in handcuffs, she could see a weight lifting
from Negan’s chest. He was happy to see the man being put into the police car and while he
obviously would have rather hurt the man himself, he at least was satisfied to see the man taken in.
Squeezing his fingers in her grasp, she was just happy that she was able to stop the catastrophe that
could have happened tonight if things went wrong. Now, they had to look forward to their future
together that would hopefully be bright and full of happiness now that the darkest part of their life
was finally put away.
 Chapter 16
Chapter Summary

Taking a leap of faith, Y/N decides to get married to Negan and start the next
adventure of her life with him.

Chapter Notes

I'm sorry this took so long to update. I had a real hard time where I was going through
some serious writers block and lack of inspiration. I will do my best to try to update
my stories more often. Thank you to anyone that might still want to read this. I
acknowledge it's been a very long time since I've actually written it. I do plan to finish
it though. Thank you for reading!

This was a day that Y/N never thought she would have. Something that always seemed like a
nightmare to her growing up. It had her wondering if the person she used to be was even part of her
anymore. Getting married to someone was never something that she thought she would want, yet
here she was. The idea of getting married to Negan and being with him for the rest of her life was
exceedingly appealing to her. There was that need to never be without Negan now that she had him
in her life. It was amazing how fast being with the person you loved could change things for you.
The views that her father had set in stone in her mind for so long quickly altered as soon as she had
Negan in her life and she didn’t regret it. When she was focused on nothing but schooling and her
career, there was a sense of loneliness to her. Now, with Negan and Sam in her life, Y/N was
happy. Being happy was something she never understood until now. It was an addicting feeling.
Something that she never wanted to let go of and with the way that Negan made her feel, she never
saw herself letting go of that feeling.

Lifting her hands up, she noticed the way they were shaking and she knew that she was nervous.
Not because she was getting married to Negan, but because she was always uneasy about herself.
Since getting with Negan she had always thought there was that possible chance that Negan
deserved better than her. Someone who would love him as much as he deserved to be loved. In her
mind, she never felt like she was a great person so the thought that she could be a bad wife scared
the hell out of her. There was still so much she needed to learn about love and open herself up to.
Negan was one of the most loving people she had ever known and both him along with Sam had
given their hearts to her in no time. The fear of letting them down lingered in her mind, but she
knew that she wanted to be with Negan regardless.

That was one of the reasons she was shaken, but also the excitement of the idea of being married to
Negan. In her mind, she assumed that it wouldn’t change much in their relationship, but there was
that chance that it could change everything. Especially when this was something she never planned
for growing up.

“Now, you’re certain this is what you want?” Jane’s voice pressed in behind Y/N from where she
was standing at the car. They had gotten ready at home and drove out to where they were having
the wedding. Elaina had gone off to make sure that things were getting ready for her and obviously
by Jane’s reaction she had gotten the call from Elaina to tell her that it was okay to come down.
“I’m not trying to make you back out of this by the way. I just kind of feel like this was rushing
into things after the other night with what Negan almost did with the guy that hurt Sam. I know
you two were engaged previously, but this is a bit fast to come up with something like this.”

“I understand what you are saying and I appreciate you bringing it up to me. The old me would
have thought I was crazy too, but love makes you do crazy things. I know the way I feel about him
and I never want to have it stop,” Y/N explained with a sigh, turning to face Jane who was staring
out at her with worried eyes. Jane looked gorgeous standing behind her with her hair done up
beautifully and it was the first time today that she had seen Jane dress up the way that she was. Her
dark hair enhanced her cheekbones and the dress she was wearing contrasted well against her
tawny brown colored flesh. “No one has ever made me feel the way that Negan has. I can’t
imagine letting him go and then getting so many years into the future only to realize I made a
mistake. I’m head over heels in love with Negan and I know this is what I want.”

“That’s all that matters then,” Jane stepped forward to reach for her hands to give them a
supportive squeeze. “If you know for certain that this is what you want, then I support you
completely. I know for certain that love makes you do crazy things sometimes because I’ve had the
same thing happen to me. So I can’t judge you for that.”

“I appreciate that,” Y/N looked down toward the grasp that Jane’s fingers had on hers. “Are you
okay with me marrying Negan? It won’t bother you that you will be having me in your life because
of Sam?”

“Why are you asking for my opinion?” Jane lifted one of her hands and placed it over the center of
her chest making Y/N shrug her shoulders. It just seemed like a respectful question to ask Jane
since involving Negan in Sam’s life was already something so different than what she had been
used to. “That’s silly.”

“Is it though? Sam is now going to be a big part of Negan’s life and I know that it’s hard enough
having to deal with that when Sam has been only yours for so long. Bringing another woman into
this relationship, I want to know that it’s not going to ruin things between you and Elaina,” Y/N
brought up the tension that was so evident between Jane and Negan previously that had put a lot of
discomfort on this family. “I just don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable that I’m part of
Negan’s life.”

“Elaina and I would have broken up already if it was that simple to tear us apart,” Jane declared,
sliding her hands up Y/N’s arms before giving her shoulders a supportive squeeze. “You have to
understand here that Negan complicated things between us, that’s true, but that was also our own
fault. I don’t think Negan is going to be taking Elaina away from me. I see the way he looks at you.
It’s the same way that he looked at Lucille. I think you’re good for Negan. There is no question in
my mind about that.”

“I’m not Lucille,” Y/N swallowed down hard knowing that Negan certainly loved her, but she
knew that Lucille’s death still bothered Negan. Hell, he still wore his wedding ring from his
marriage with Lucille on a necklace to this day.

“You don’t have to be Lucille for Negan to love you,” Jane pushed further, her eyes trying to get
Y/N to focus on her. “Yes, we can love multiple people in our life, but that doesn’t make our love
any less important. You’re you and Negan loves you the way you are. That’s what matters the
most. I just didn’t want you to feel like you were rushing into things.”

“You’re really sweet,” Y/N whispered with a sigh knowing that at the beginning of her relationship
with Negan, she had a different view of Jane, but since Sam had gotten hurt Jane seemed to have a
turn around with things. In the distance she could see that the sun was starting to set in the sky and
she knew that they would have to head to Negan and the rest of the group. “Maybe I am rushing
things, but it feels right. I think the reason I decided it was the right idea was because of the other
night. The idea of losing Negan hurt me more than anything I could ever imagine. I love Negan
and he has made me feel things that I didn’t even know I was capable of feeling.”

“I don’t know what it is about you women with Negan,” Jane announced with a sigh stepping back
and away from Y/N with a shrug. The comment made Y/N smirk and she understood why Jane
was saying it. “It’s like he’s a fucking drug for all of you,” it was clear that Jane was about to go on
a personal rant about Negan, but when she saw the expression Y/N was giving her she simply
scoffed, “wrong time for me to go off on that.”

“It’s okay. I understand that there is a history there between you. Even that, that’s something about
Negan that I really appreciate. He’s brutally honest with me and I never have to worry about him
lying,” Y/N pointed out with a shrug of her shoulders knowing that a lot of people weren’t like
that. “I know how you feel about him and it makes sense. I just hope the two of you will grow to
be more comfortable with one another.”

“We’re working on it,” Jane acknowledged with a grumble making Y/N nod. “We both have
caused each other unnecessary sadness and pain. It’s time to grow up. Especially for Sam because
it’s what she deserves.”

“I agree. Sam should always come first,” Y/N made it clear how she felt about Negan’s daughter
that he shared with Elaina. “I could also understand why you said the drug thing. I know this is
fast. I know that there is part of me inside that is saying this is too fast. But then I think of how
much time I’ve spent in my life feeling the complete opposite way that I do now and I’m so much
happier now. Negan has a way of making me feel loved. Something I never felt in my entire life. I
never understood that feeling. Not until Negan and Sam.”

“They’re both good like that I guess,” Jane gave a weak smile and the sound of her phone buzzing
in her purse was heard. “I think that’s my wife telling us we need to get a move on it. They
probably think I’m helping you escape.”

“Negan knows better,” Y/N chuckled knowing that what she had with Negan was absolutely pure.
“You think I’m making the right decision, right? Negan told me that you and Elaina got together
after college.”

“Listen, you don’t need to ask me my opinion. You’re not a child. You’re in your twenties. You’re
not too young to understand what this means for you. You know what you’re doing with your life
and what you want. If Negan is the person you want to be with and you’re okay with this crazy
family that comes with being in Negan’s life…then we’re happy to have you here. Sam loves you
and thinks the world of you. That’s what is most important to me. If Sam loves you, then I know
you’re perfect,” Jane explained further making a warmth grow at the center of her chest hearing
that from Jane specifically. “You’re right. I fell in love young and I don’t regret it. You know when
you’ve met that person you are supposed to be with forever and I support you feeling that way.”

“I appreciate that,” Y/N stepped forward to hug Jane knowing that Jane had a very long history
with Negan that wasn’t always comfortable, so to hear Jane say that was very nice and made her
feel at ease in this relationship. “I guess we should head down.”

“If you’re ready, I’m by your side. Otherwise, I’m ready to take you on the run with me if you get
second thoughts,” Jane teased her with a wink, leaning back far enough to look Y/N over. “I wish
Elaina and I would have done something small like this when we got married. It’s so much more
personal. Other people being there just made things complicated.”

“I don’t need the rest of the world here to know that I love Negan and want to be with him. Hell,
most of the people in my life would have a problem with it anyways. They would tell me that I was
throwing my life away by being with him,” she responded thinking about her family. It hurt that
her mother wouldn’t be here, but if she invited her mother, she knew that her father would get
involved somehow and that was something she just couldn’t have. It would be something that she
would have to eventually talk out with her mother, but it just felt like it was the best decision not to
include her parents in this. “All I care about is loving him.”

“I don’t blame you,” Jane reached out to press her hands in over Y/N’s shoulders again when Jane
noticed the way that her face flushed over. “You look beautiful. You’re going to take his breath
away when he sees you.”

“Thank you,” Y/N smiled looking down to gaze over her dress. “I hope so.”

“I know so,” Jane assured her, reaching for her hand. In that moment Y/N knew that it meant it was
time to go. It was nerve wrecking knowing where this was headed, but she wanted this. Very much.

Approaching the hilled area that they were on, Y/N and Jane carefully walked down the hill
together taking their time. It took a while for them to make it across the large plot of land to where
they would be having their wedding. In the distance, the hot air balloons were already lit up
making her take in a deep breath. It was Negan’s idea to get married at the place they had first
gotten together officially and it was really romantic to think about it. Just seeing the hot air
balloons that were in the distance made her think back to that day when Negan talked about the
potential of asking her to marry him. It just seemed like a fairytale back then, but now it was so
much more than that. It was reality.

Most people wanted to go all out for their weddings. They wanted all the attention on them, but this
really felt like the perfect wedding for Y/N. They were at a beautiful plot of land in nature right by
the water. Hot air balloons were lined up beautifully in the background. It felt like a spectacle
without having everyone there to witness it. The people that mattered were the people that were
there. Negan did everything he could to be prince charming and pull this all together and she loved
it.

By the water, she could see that Negan was talking with Sam. He was knelt down while they were
looking at something in the water. It was obvious that he hadn’t noticed that she had started
making her way down to them. Elaina was waiting with someone that was one of Negan’s friends
who agreed to do the wedding for them. An amused laugh fell from her throat when she saw Oliver
sitting patiently waiting with them in a suit that made her heart feel full.

Even though this was quickly thrown together, it felt special and thought out. This area had meant
so much to her relationship with Negan and this would certainly be a night that she would never
forget. That was for certain.

Taking one final look at herself, Y/N couldn’t help but find amusement in the fact that she was
wearing this white wedding dress that she had picked out. It was something that she would have
never pictured herself doing, but Negan changed a lot about her life. Elaina helped her pick out the
dress and she had left Negan’s house last night to go to spend the night with the girls just to keep
some sort of tradition for them with getting married. Thankfully, Jane was good with hair and
makeup so that’s why she spent most of the early day with Jane. It was nice having someone that
was willing to help her out with everything.

When the sound of them approaching was heard, Negan looked over his shoulder and when his
eyes fell upon her there was a loud exhale that could be heard from where she was standing.
Carefully, Negan pulled himself up into a standing position and turned slowly on his heel to face
her. Pushing his hands into his pockets, Y/N felt her cheeks flush over looking at him. Negan was
wearing a black suit with a white dress shirt underneath. The coat was pulled together by just one
button in the middle and the shirt had the two buttons on the top undone. His hair was freshly cut
which was something he must have done this morning while she was gone. This was honestly the
first time she had ever seen him dressed up and she was impressed with how good he looked.

“Wow,” Negan finally breathed out, his lips parting while he looked over her. A bright smile
expanded over his features the longer he stared out at her and he shook his head. “My God Y/N,
you are absolutely stunning. You know that?”

“Me? Look at you,” she pointed in his direction, twirling her finger in the air watching Negan’s
dimples suck in when he lowered his head down to look at himself. “You look amazing.”

“I told him he should have worn a tie,” Sam spoke up, moving in beside Negan making Y/N smirk
when she saw Negan’s daughter dressed up looking absolutely adorable. They had picked a dress
that had matched the color of the cast that she was wearing. Oliver stood up from where he was
seated to move in beside Sam who knelt down to brush her fingers over the top of their dog’s head.
“I know he hates them, but there is tradition and all.”

“It looked bad,” Negan reasoned, reaching up to place his hand in over the center of his chest. “I
tried. Okay? It just didn’t fit with the whole look. You know me, I’m more of a laid-back kind of
guy and I’m trying to be as traditional as possible, but some things…I just can’t.”

“I like this,” Y/N assured him, stepping forward to place her hand in over the center of his chest.
Going to tip up, she let out a gasp when Sam stepped between the two of them and pushed them
apart making them both laugh.

“No kissing yet,” Sam ordered making Negan snort at his daughter’s response. “You have to get
married in order to be able to kiss. If you kiss before the wedding, it’s bad luck.”

“I’ve never heard that,” Negan snorted, tipping his head to the side when Sam dramatically
shrugged. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard that.”

“I’m pretty sure I’ve heard that. Even if I’m making it up, you have to wait until the ceremony to
kiss her,” Sam demanded of Negan making him huff before bouncing his head about and nodding.
“That’s just the deal.”

“What are we waiting for then?” Negan reached for Y/N’s hand leading her toward the area that he
had set up previously with his friend in order to do this. Getting situated, Negan felt his breath
escape his lungs when he stood before her. Taking a moment to gaze over her, Negan knew that
this was something he wanted to keep with him for a long time. When Lucille died, Negan never
thought he would find happiness again. Now he was marrying someone he loved more than he
could have ever imagined. It was taking everything inside of him not to get emotional, but he was.
He couldn’t help it. She was beautiful. She was happy. And it was because of him. Their journey
was bumpy, but they still made it here together and that was what mattered. Stroking his thumbs
over the back of her hands, he felt his heartrate quicken. His Adam’s apple bounced in his throat
and there was a burning in his eyes. “I’m going to cry like a baby. I hope you know that.”

“I’m okay with that,” she professed with a broken breath as well feeling her own heart hammering
inside of her chest. The rest of the group surrounded them, but her focus was on Negan and how
gorgeous he was. When a single tear slid down the side of his face, she raised her palm up and
stroked it over the side of his chiseled jawline. “I love you. So much.”
“I love you,” Negan gave her a wink, wondering if he would make it through this thing without
looking like a mess. “You’re marrying a very emotional person. I hope you know that.”

“And I love him just the way he is,” she whispered knowing that he was worried about how she
would respond, but she loved to hear that Negan had so many feelings. His soul was beautiful and
she couldn’t have picked someone better if she tried. The friend that he had asked to marry them
moved beside them and they knew that meant it was starting.

With a whistle, Negan nodded beside him to have Oliver come to sit next to Negan. The fact that
Oliver was already so obedient and was trained so well impressed Y/N. Negan did a great job with
their dog and he fit right in with the family.

“I think he’s trying to take your trophy for the sharpest looking guy at this ceremony,” Y/N teased
Negan making Negan look down with a happy smile. With the way Negan smiled, it drew large
amounts of attention to his dimples. It was one of the things about him physically that drove her
wild about him and with his shave that he had they were very prominent today. “I love you
Negan.”

“I love you,” Negan’s eyebrows bounced up, his eyes returning to hers and it was like in this
moment they shut the whole world out. Everything was so unconventional with this ceremony, but
it was perfect and felt like a dream come true. Negan gave her a wink when his friend started going
over things with them. Everyone was silent with the ceremony and it was extremely calming to say
the least.

The first part was honestly a blur, but the further they got into their own personal ceremony, she
could see that Negan’s tears were growing which made her heart flutter at the sight of it. The way
he was looking at her was with such love and it was clear that he was proud of this whole thing.
Squeezing her fingers with his, she couldn’t believe that she was actually getting married to this
man. He was everything she could have dreamt of and more.

“Do you have vows prepared?” Negan’s friend questioned making Negan let out a nervous breath.

“I mean, not really, but let’s wing it,” Negan chuckled, tipping his head to the side when his friend
looked to him to start. It took a moment for him to gather himself. He went to start, but a
shuddering breath fell from his throat and it made him laugh. “I’m trying not to sob here. You’ll
have to forgive me if I need to take breaks so I can get through this.”

“We all understand,” Sam whispered, tugging supportively on Negan’s jacket from where she was
standing beside him. It made both Negan and Y/N smile and Negan gave Sam a wink before giving
Y/N his attention again.

“Y/N. God, I don’t know where to start. I never thought I would be doing this again,” Negan
whispered, his throat flexed while he gazed down at their hands. Stroking his thumb over the back
of them, Negan took his time to think things over before shrugging his shoulders. “For the longest
time I felt like I was lost. It felt like a part of me was gone and I was just fading away. Even though
I was here, something was missing. It felt like I was broken and I was never going to be able to be
whole again. I was very nervous when I moved. People told me that it would make my life better,
but of course I didn’t believe them. But they were right. Because moving brought one of the most
important things into my life…and that was you. From the first moment I saw you, you fucking
enchanted me.”

“Negan,” Elaina laughed making Negan shrug his shoulders when he looked to Sam who simply
mirrored the same gesture and was visibly unbothered by it.
“Let him do his thing mom,” Sam nudged her mother making both Negan and Y/N smile when he
got comfortable again, squeezing tightly to Y/N’s fingers. “Swearing is kind of his thing. It
wouldn’t be him if he didn’t get a few f-bombs in there. So hush.”

“Yes ma’am,” Elaina chuckled, lowering her head with a smirk before giving a nod again. “Please
continue.”

“Thank you,” Negan mused before letting out a chuckle himself. “You were a breath of fresh air in
a world of craziness for me. I knew the moment I first heard you talk that I wanted you to be in my
life. And then we had our first conversation and I knew all the more that I had to be near you. I
think we were made for each other. Both lost in a world that was so cold and keeping us from the
things that would make us happy. Looking for something more. You brought warmth back into my
heart and let me know that I could love again,” Negan whimpered making her lips part when she
started to find herself getting emotional too. Seeing him cry had her trying her hardest to keep
everything in. The fact he could get so emotional over this moment took her breath away. “I
promise after this day you will never feel alone again. You will have a partner for life that will
support you every step of the way. I will be with you. I will carry you through the rougher parts of
your life. I will never leave you. If you ever feel like letting go, I will always be there to help get
you get where you want in life. I want you happy. I want all of your greatest dreams to come true. I
will do anything it takes to help you accomplish them. Every night and every morning I promise to
tell you I love you. I will take every moment I can to let you know how special you are to me.
You’re it for me. You have accepted all of me. All of the broken pieces, you help mend them
together. I’m whole with you. I have all I’ve ever wanted in life with you, Sam and Oliver. I
promise to always be yours. To cherish you throughout everything, no matter what. I love you Y/N
and I always will.”

“Well shit,” she breathed out making Negan smirk when she noticed there were more tears
following Negan’s words. Now they were both crying and she couldn’t believe how emotional of a
person Negan had actually made her. Especially since she felt like she was so cold after her entire
life of being raised to be that way. “You should have had me go first because how do I top that?”

“You’ve got this,” Negan’s friend reached out to supportively squeeze over her shoulder making
her look down at where her fingers were hooked with Negan’s.

“Negan, who knew that when I was fighting with my father outside and spotted the hot neighbor
from across the street being too nosy that I would end up here getting married to him?” she
muttered making Negan chuckle when she said that. Saying that made her think back to that
moment. Boy, he frustrated the hell out of her with how nosy he was. Yet, he enamored her even
back then. “I spent my life believing that love was just some fake, made-up thing that people
always bragged about, but never really had. The people in my life made me cold to the idea of ever
being able to love. Being with you changed everything for me. Love has a face for me and that’s
you Negan. I’m still learning to change, but there is no one in life that I could ever imagine being
with and growing in life with other than you. I love you. You and Sam awakened something inside
of me that I never knew I was capable of, but I’m happy that you did. You’re my family. You’re
more my family in just the few months I spent with you than my blood family was my entire life.
You’re perfect in every way imaginable. Broken pieces and all. You make me want to be a better
person and I love you, so very much. You are the person I want to wake up next to every morning
and take on the world with. You are everything to me and I promise to never let go of this because
I know with everything that I am that this is where I’m meant to be. With you everything is right
and I’m no longer afraid to take on the future because I’ll have you by my side.”

After her vows, Negan brought her hand up to his lips and deposited a kiss over the back of her
hand. Negan’s bottom lip was tremoring. There was no hiding his emotions anymore. There were
tears and lots of them, but she didn’t seem to mind.

When it was time for the rings exchange, Negan held up his finger to motion them to wait and he
reached into one of the pockets that was in the suit that they had put on Oliver. Pulling out the
boxes, Negan heard the sound of the girls chuckling and he shrugged his shoulders.

“We weren’t going to lose them this way,” Negan pet Oliver, giving him a quick kiss over the top
of his head before returning.

Doing Negan’s wedding band first, Y/N felt her hands trembling when she slid it up his long,
slender finger repeating the words that she was meant to. Everything felt so surreal when she
looked up at Negan who was completely in awe of her. When it was Negan’s turn and he slid the
ring up her finger, everything started to feel so official and real. This was it. Everything she never
thought she would have but found in Negan. Everything else felt like a blur until Negan’s friend
pronounced them husband and wife.

Stepping forward, Negan reached up to cup her face in his palms and stroked his fingers over the
sides of her face. Lowering in, Negan captured her lips in a lingering, loving kiss that took her
breath away when he pulled back. Pressing his forehead to hers, Negan smiled and there was a
sense of relief over his features.

“I love you wife,” Negan whispered when she tipped up to press another kiss over his lips. Hearing
him call her that actually felt good. It meant a lot to her to know that she was his and he was hers.

“I love you husband,” she responded with a wink hearing their family clapping and she lowered her
hand with his hooking their fingers together. This was better than anything she could have asked
for. A big wedding would have only made things stressful and this was perfect for them. They were
with those that they loved most and things were official.

“Congratulations Mr. and Mrs. Smith,” Negan’s friend gave their shoulders a squeeze before
walking away to give them a moment together.

“Are you happy?” Negan whispered, the warmth of his breath lingering over her lips making her
smile.

“I am,” she responded, hooking her arms loosely around his waist hearing those around them
talking. “You make me happy.”

“And I promise to spend the rest of my life doing my best to do that,” Negan assured her with a
sigh, claiming her lips in another kiss that drew her to tip up on her toes. “You’re a dream come
true to me. I hope you know that.”

“I feel the same way about you,” she maintained with a happy smile, a hum vibrating against his
lips before he peppered faint kisses over her lips.

“Time for your first dance,” Sam blurt out making Negan laugh against Y/N’s mouth when Sam
went over to her phone and hooked it up to a speaker that they had brought with them.

“Yes ma’am,” Negan led Y/N toward a flatter piece of the ground knowing that he had let Sam
pick their first song. When he heard it, it made him smile and he reached for Y/N to pull her close
to him. With the sun almost down, the light from the hot air balloons was illuminating the area
surrounding them. Dancing in Negan’s arms in the middle of nowhere with those that were there
staring at them might have felt awkward to some people, but this felt like something out of a dream
for Y/N. “I love you so much.”
“I love you more,” Negan mused with a half-smirk, nuzzling his nose in against hers. “You’re
never going to have to worry or wonder if you are loved again. I promise you are always going to
feel loved and appreciated. You have my heart Y/N. I fucking swear…”

“Good,” she laughed, cuddling her head in against Negan’s chest appreciating the moment. It was
one she wanted to last forever because it felt perfect just the way it was. With the way he said
things, she knew that he meant it. There was never a doubt in her mind that Negan was head over
heels in love with her and that comforted her. There was always a fear about her future in the past,
but she knew that with Negan by her side that was something she would never have to worry about
again. “I hope that I can make you feel the same.”

After hearing her say that, Negan deposited a kiss over her forehead and held her close. In his arms,
she felt protected. She felt wanted and it was one of the best feeling she could have ever asked for.
Sam had made a playlist for their wedding. It wasn’t a place they thought they would be spending
a majority of the night at, but surprisingly it was late in the night by the time they were sitting on
top of a blanket near a fire that they had built. Negan had her wrapped up in his arms with her
resting back against his chest. Everyone else was still having fun and being silly while they
danced. Oliver was cuddled up on the blanket beside them already sleeping, finding comfort by the
warmth of the fire.

“You’re sure you don’t want something more with a wedding,” Negan nuzzled his nose in against
the side of her neck, depositing a sweet, delicate kiss there. Hooking his fingers with hers, he
traced both her wedding ring and her engagement ring with his thumb before smiling. “I can do a
second one for you if you want.”

“We don’t want to soil this one because this one was perfect,” she got more comfortable in his arms
and yawned. Being wrapped up in the warmth of his arms had her relaxed and she knew that when
they went home, she would have no trouble sleeping.

“I thought the same, but I just wanted to make sure,” Negan growled, nipping faintly at her flesh
making her laugh. “What about our honeymoon? You want me to plan it?”

“Whatever you want baby,” she didn’t want to give him an answer with that one because she didn’t
care where they were. “We don’t need to do something extravagant. I’m happy with just being with
you and Sam.”

“I have to pamper my wife somehow,” Negan pointed out, squeezing her tightly in his arms. “I’ll
figure something out.”

“Hey,” Elaina headed over toward Negan and Y/N, taking a seat beside them while Jane and Sam
still were having fun together. “Are you two sure that you want to take Sam home with you? I
know most people after they get married want to be…intimate with one another.”

“We have the rest of our lives to be intimate with one another,” Y/N waved her hand about
knowing that they both agreed they wanted Sam with them on their wedding night. “I promise you,
we are completely okay with it. Spending the night with the two people I care about the most is the
perfect ending to my wedding night for me.”

“I love you,” Negan hummed against the side of her neck, covering it with kisses. Clearly, he was
impressed with her answer, but she meant what she said. Being with the two of them made her
happy and that’s all she could ask for in this life.

Getting married to Negan was the best surprise that Y/N could have asked for. The night was
magical, they were with the people that mattered the most and they were happy. It was a great day
and they both loved each other so much that the day felt like a dream come true for them. When
they got home, they sat in the backyard together with Sam and Oliver until the morning. It was an
amazing day. One that Y/N would never forget.

With their wedding being small and so personal, Negan had worked really hard for a few days to
find them a honeymoon that they could share together. When Negan randomly picked a day and
decided that he was taking her to the Caribbean, she was blown away. Sam and Oliver would be
staying with Jane and Elaina while they were gone. Everything that fallen so easily into place with
it being summertime with Negan off of work.

Even though she had told him she was okay with something small, she found herself on a boat in
the middle of the water with the sun beating down in over them. It surprised her and awed her at
the same time. The water was crystal blue, the sky was clear and the sounds of the water were so
calming. Negan had his arm wrapped loosely around her waist while he laughed and joked with the
person who was taking them where they were going.

Negan was so specific in planning this out that he wanted this whole trip to be incredible for her.
The sights they had seen already were incredible when they had landed from their plane ride.
Originally, she thought the two of them would just lounge around the beach together at the resort
that they had passed up, but Negan assured her they had something more special for the two of
them.

“Hey Darlin’,” Negan whispered, pulling her attention to him to make her look at him instead of
their surroundings. Bobbing his head forward, she could see that they were headed in the direction
of a yacht that was in the middle of the water. Seeing it made her heart skip a beat and she couldn’t
believe what she saw. “There is our home for the next few days.”

“What?” she stepped in closer to Negan feeling his arm wrapping around her shoulders to squeeze
her in closer to him. “Who does that belong to?”

“It’s mine,” Negan answered her making her throat tighten upon hearing it. The fact that her
husband owned a yacht in the Caribbean made her jaw drop. It wasn’t the biggest thing in the
world, but it was still pretty damn nice. “Well, it’s ours.”

“How long have you had a fucking yacht in the Caribbean?” she tipped her head up at him seeing
the way that Negan’s eyebrows bounced up when she asked him that.

“Well, a few days,” he replied with a sigh, a wide smirk pressing in over his features when he
nodded toward it. “I figured it would be good to have something for us to escape away to
sometimes. A home away from home. I hired a few people to be on it with us for the few days we
are here.”

“Oh?” she quipped back making him snicker. “You just thought now would be a good time to buy
a yacht?”

“I guess I should have gone over that purchase with you since you’re my wife now, but I thought
you would enjoy yourself more if we took to the waters on our own personal boat instead of
counting on someone else to take us around. You know what I mean?” Negan responded, his deep
raspy voice making her crack a smile before she shook her head.

“Oh, sure,” she wrapped her arm around his waist and felt him warm beneath her touch. “I can’t
really judge your purchases Negan. Your family’s money is your money. I don’t have a say in what
you do with it.”
“Well, you are my wife,” Negan reminded her, leaning down to press a kiss in over her temple.

“As your wife, are you ever going to tell me how your family ended up with this much money?”
she pushed him for answers making Negan snort before tipping his head from side to side. “I mean,
you’re fucking loaded.”

“I’m a gym teacher as far as most of the world knows,” Negan reminded her with a shallow breath,
his head tipping to the side. “I told you, my father was a businessman. I didn’t want to be part of
the family business so I just own shares in the company and I sold my part of the business to him.
And when he died, well…”

“There is still so much about you I don’t know,” she eyed Negan over watching the mischievous
smile that pressed in over his handsome features. “That’s okay though because I have a shitload of
time to learn about it.”

“There is the spirit,” Negan hummed, pressing a quick kiss against her lips before preparing her to
get onto the yacht. By the time they were on it and he saw Y/N looking over everything with big
eyes it made him chuckle. “What is it?”

“Sometimes by the way you act I forget that I’m married to someone who is absolutely loaded,”
she answered him feeling his arms wrapping around her from behind. If you would have told her
that she would have been spending her honeymoon on an expensive yacht that her husband owned
years ago, she would have never believed it. Hell, a few hours ago she wouldn’t have even thought
about it either. “Then I see things like this and realize how much money you actually have.”

“I could have gone super extensive, but I thought something like this would be nice,” Negan led
her up the stairs toward the second level after giving her a tour of the first. He had introduced her to
a few people that would be on the boat with them and she was honestly just shocked with the
whole thing. A surprised breath fell from her throat when she entered what she assumed to be the
master bedroom on the yacht. It was very open leaving them space to gaze out upon the gorgeous
views of the water while they laid together in the bed. “You like?”

“Of course I like, but I don’t feel like I should be here,” she informed him with a smirk gasping
when Negan tugged her toward the bed and nudged her down on top of it. Getting comfortable, she
smiled when she saw Negan pulling at the buttons of the white shirt that he was wearing. Negan
tugged it from his arms and threw it aside on the floor. “Aren’t you worried about pirates?”

“Pirates?” Negan snorted, his nose wrinkling when he crawled in over her and lowered down to
meet her lips in a passionate kiss that took her breath away. “I told you that I hired a few people on
the yacht to help us while we were here. Pirates is a bit archaic though and we’re going to stick to
the populated tourist areas. We’re going to be okay. I promise you that.”

“This is almost like I’m living in a dream,” she stated lifting up enough to kiss over Negan’s
chiseled jawline feeling his fingers working at her shorts that she was wearing in attempts to get the
material from her body. “Being married to someone like you, in a place like this.”

“Every moment I wake up next to you is like a dream to me,” Negan growled, nibbling at her
jawline before pulling back to tug the material down and toss it aside. Negan hummed out loud, his
tongue drawing out over his bottom lip when she looked over the long lines of his body. Negan’s
pants were hanging low at his hips showing the incredibly long v-line that enhanced the view of
his body. Leaning up, she pressed her hands in over his sides while her kisses centered in right
below his navel. Nipping at the soft flesh that was there, she started to lower her wet lips making
him moan out. “I figured we should get to know this part of the yacht first.”
“Have sex on a yacht while staring out at the water will be a first for me,” she teased her fingers
through the dark hair that covered Negan’s long torso. “Can’t say I’ve ever done anything like that
before.”

“I enjoy being your first for a lot of things,” Negan reached for her, cupping her face in his hands
to bring her up to her knees so he could kiss her over and over again. With his tongue flicking out
over hers, she found her fingers slipping into the back of his bathing suit. Pushing it down, her
hands squeezed over his small bottom and she licked her lips. “We’re going to have a fuck load of
sex on this trip. I hope you know that.”

“I look forward to it,” she growled, nipping at his bottom lip and tugging at it seductively. It had
Negan groaning out when she pulled further at the material of his bathing suit getting it just at the
bottom of his hips. Looking between them, she reached for his semi-erect cock and started to
stroke over it with determined motions. “Wondering when I’m going to wake up. I have a sexy
husband, with a big cock who pampers the fuck out of me…”

“The big cock helps, huh?” Negan joked with her, his nose wrinkling when he sucked faintly at her
bottom lip before kissing her heatedly again. Thrusting his hips, he enjoyed the grasp she had on
his body and he stood up enough to kick out of the material of his swim trunks. Reaching for Y/N,
Negan got her onto her knees and pulled her toward the center of the bed facing the water. With a
whimper, she felt the weight of Negan’s manhood tapping against her bottom and it made her purr
out. “The sights here are incredible. The staff will leave us alone when we’re out on the deck. They
know it is our honeymoon, so they fully expect the two of us to be preoccupied quite a bit.”

“Here I was thinking we are going to be sightseeing, but in reality, we’re just going to be fucking
the whole time, huh?” she looked over her shoulder, wiggling her hips when she saw him rubbing
himself up against her bottom making her bite at her bottom lip.

“We’re still going to sightsee, we’re just going to probably have sex at every sight we see,”
Negan’s smile was cocky and arrogant, but it made her heart skip a beat. God, he was incredibly
sexy and he knew it. Reaching for the material of her bathing suit bottoms, Negan pulled them
down and over her body just enough to reveal her to him. Grabbing the base of his erection, Negan
teased the swollen tip through her sensitive folds making her swallow down hard. “We haven’t
slept together since we got married, so I think we deserve it. Don’t you?”

“I don’t know if I’ll ever deserve you,” she whimpered when the head of Negan’s cock teased at
her entrance making her bite down firmly on her bottom lip. Again and again he tempted her with
the idea, but never fully gave it to her. “I didn’t think this trip would be about torturing me.”

“You’re really fucking wet, you know that?” Negan growled, bracing himself in over her by
placing both of his hands beside hers. Kissing over her jawline, Negan nipped at the flesh and then
reached between them again.

“Negan,” she felt a sense of dizziness and she pulled away quickly making Negan let out a
confused sound. She tried pulling up the material of her bathing suit making Negan tip his head to
the side confused. “Where is the bathroom?”

“What’s wrong?” Negan pointed in the direction of where the bathroom was and she swiftly ran off
in the other direction toward it. Cringing, Negan heard the sounds of her throwing up inside of it
and he moved over toward the bathroom after pulling his trunks back on to see her hunched over
the toilet. “You okay?”

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” she apologized over and over again knowing that this had to be the
furthest thing from sexy right now. “This is definitely not how you wanted to spend your
honeymoon with your wife. You probably won’t want to have sex with me again after this. I’m
sorry.”

“It’s okay,” Negan hushed her, lowering down to press his hands in over her back to try to comfort
her in a soothing caress. “I didn’t know if you would have the motion sickness or not being on a
boat. I’ll have to go grab us some of those pressure bracelets that I bought for motion sickness.
They are pretty good at helping.”

“I don’t know what happened, it just came on suddenly,” she explained letting out a groan while
Negan kept her hair back with her getting sick. “I’m sure you find me incredibly sexy now getting
sick on you like this.”

“Hey, I always find you sexy. Taking care of you is part of the job of being your husband and I’m
totally up for the job,” Negan declared watching her lean back on her knees when she likely
finished. Stroking his fingers through her hair, he gave her a half smirk and stroked his thumb in
over the side of her face. “You okay?”

“I’m so sorry,” she frowned knowing that they were right in the middle of trying to get frisky with
one another, but it was going to fail miserably. Negan reached for a washcloth from the counter to
hand it to her making her glance away from him. Negan slid his finger in underneath her jawline to
get her to look back up at him. “I’m sure this is not the first thing you wanted when you thought of
your honeymoon with your wife.”

“I’m not disappointed. We’re going to have the rest of our lives to be together,” Negan reminded
her with a wink, helping to get her up to her feet. Stroking his fingers through her hair, Negan took
his time to look her over and sighed. “Anything that you need I’m sure I have stocked in this
bathroom.”

“Just give me a minute,” she asked of him, giving his hands a firm squeeze before he left the
restroom. Negan headed over toward the sliding door that led out to the deck for him to drop down
on one of the lounging chairs. Closing his eyes he enjoyed the warmth of the sun on his skin and
enjoyed listening to the sound of the water. It took a few minutes before Y/N finally followed him
out and she let out a tense breath. “Well that was something I wish wouldn’t have happened.”

“Please don’t worry about it. I get motion sickness a lot too. Don’t worry about it,” Negan hushed,
adjusting his positioning to give her enough room to come sit with him on the lounging chair
together. Negan wrapped her up in his arms and pressed faint kisses over the side of her neck. “We
have a lot to accomplish anyways. There is so much I want to do. There is this island that appears
only during a certain time of day and then later in the day, the water rises to the point that it
disappears. It’s really cool. Also, there is this cave that we have to swim to in order to see. I’ve seen
photos and it’s incredible. I want to take you snorkeling. There are some pretty phenomenal things
to see.”

“That’s a lot,” she acknowledged making Negan smile, his eyebrows bouncing up when she looked
over her shoulder at him.

“And that’s just today,” Negan stammered, his eyebrows furrowing when he stared out at her.
“There is a lot to get done on this trip and by the time we get home, you’re probably going to need
some recovery time to just relax for a while.”

And Negan was not kidding. The first thing they did was go to that island that Negan was talking
about. It was literally in the middle of the body of water and it was an incredible sight. It felt like
being stranded, but at the same time it was so peaceful that it was a place that you would never
want to leave. They honestly had spent a lot of time just lounging in the sand and kissing. There
was a lot of kissing. This time though, there was nowhere for them to sneak off and finish what
they had started. So after they were kissing, they just walked the edge of the island near the water
before getting back to the yacht.

They had stayed out on the deck when Negan led them to the next destination which was the
cavern that Negan had talked about. When Negan told her that they needed to swim to it, she was
nervous at first, but listened. Negan jumped into the water with ease and she followed him. When
they swam into the cavern, she found herself shocked with how it looked.

“Jesus,” she was in awe of the area surrounding them, feeling Negan moving in behind her in the
water to caress up and over the sides of her body beneath the water. “I feel like I should have
brought a camera or something in here.”

“Just enjoy it with those beautiful eyes of yours,” Negan hummed, pressing kisses over the side of
her face while she gazed over everything. They swam further into the cavern and her eyes were
centered at the opening when the sun was just hitting the right spot to have rays flooding into the
cavern. “You are so beautiful. You know that?”

“I’m sorry, I’m just in complete amazement of this,” she couldn’t help but smile realizing that she
must have been hooked on everything that they were seeing around them. “I feel like I’m in a
movie.”

“What kind of movie?” Negan responded, playfully splashing her with the water making her laugh.
“It could be a thrilling adventure film. The start of a rom-com. Then again, in a place like this it
could also be the beginning of a horror film. Two honeymooners disappear in a cavern…”

“Knock it off,” she groaned splashing him in return making Negan snort. “I’m going to go with a
mix of an adventure film and a rom-com.”

Swimming in closer to him, she reached her hand out of the water to stroke her fingers through
Negan’s wet hair, enjoying the way that his hazel eyes were staring her over with love, “Because I
hope our story together is one hell of an adventure.”

“I like the way you think,” Negan met her lips in a lingering kiss, looking up toward the opening in
the cavern. “It’s getting late. We’ll want to get in the snorkeling before it gets too dark. We’ll come
back here again, next time at night. I heard it gets really cool at night. But we need to bring
someone with us. They have this really cool tour thing that they do. That’s for another day.”

“Yes sir,” she listened to him and followed him back to the boat. Thankfully they had some time to
rest on the deck together before getting to the place where they were joining a few other couples to
go snorkeling together. It was sweet because the whole time, Negan was holding onto her hand.
Under the water, they were sharing the moment together. That was the thing about Negan. He
wanted them to experience everything together. The sights were incredible. It was unlike anything
she had ever seen before. The fish were vibrant and gorgeous and she was in awe of everything. It
was something she never knew that she would actually enjoy, but she did. By the time it was over,
she was actually disappointed because she would have liked to have seen more. This time they did
get pictures together under the water. It was something she knew that she would cherish.

When they finally got back to the yacht at the end of the night, they had gotten a romantic dinner
that was set up for them right outside of their bedroom. Thankfully, the nauseous felling never
returned to Y/N. Which meant after their dessert when Negan wanted to make things romantic
between the two of them, he could. Their first attempts at having sex together was a bit wilder and
crazier between them. But this time with the night sky and the sounds of the water surrounding
them, Negan made love to her. It was slow, focused and romantic. With Negan saying all the right
things at all the right times. Being wrapped up in his arms afterwards was amazing. It was
surprisingly easy to fall asleep on the boat after that moment.

Hours later, Y/N had woken up to the sounds of the water still surrounding her. Lifting her head,
she could see that the sun was starting to rise and that Negan was already sitting out on the deck
again clearly enjoying the moment.

Rolling onto her back, Y/N let out a surprised sound when she saw a red rose on the pillow beside
her and a letter. With a smirk, she pulled herself up in the bed bringing the sheets with her.
Reaching for the rose, she brought it up to smell it before smiling. Setting it aside, she reached for
the note and couldn’t help but smile seeing that it was in Negan’s handwriting.

Y/N,

Watching you sleep is one of the biggest joys in life for me. I’m so happy to be your husband and
can’t wait to share every morning having your beautiful face be the first thing I see.

I love you so much my beautiful wife,

Negan

Folding up the letter, she pulled it to the center of her chest and smiled. Setting the letter and the
flower aside, she gazed ahead to see Negan’s bare thigh from where he was sitting letting her know
that he was naked out on the deck. Pulling herself out of the bed, she took her time making her way
over toward the doors to the deck. Negan’s eyes lifted when she stepped beside the chair he was in
to offer her a big smile.

“Good morning gorgeous,” Negan winked, reaching out for her hand to give it a small squeeze.
Bringing it up, he placed a small kiss at the back of it before she carefully moved in over Negan
resting her knees on each side of him. Negan stretched out his legs and allowed her to get
comfortable, wrapping her arms loosely around his shoulders.

“I really liked the rose and the letter,” she brushed her fingers through his hair, finding happiness in
the way that he responded to her touch. “Am I going to keep getting those?”

“Do you like it?” Negan hummed, clicking his tongue against the top of his mouth while her
fingers sank further into his hair to give it a firm tug.

“Very much so,” she admitted, leaning forward to claim his lips in a passionate kiss. It made
Negan growl into her mouth when she reached down with her free hand to wrap her fingers loosely
around his flesh. “It was crazy romantic.”

“Then we shall see,” Negan gave her a wink, his jaw flexing while she worked to get him hard with
her touch. Watching her movements, Negan couldn’t help but smirk seeing how enthusiastic she
was about this whole thing. “I’m glad you are feeling better today than you were yesterday.”

“I love you, you know that?” she purred, making Negan moan when she grabbed a hold of his
member once it was solid in her grasps. Carefully lowering her hips down in over him made Negan
drop his head back and let out a low rumble of a moan. Negan’s hands slid down over her sides and
grasped tightly to her hips while she took her time rocking herself over his length.

“I love you,” Negan repeated with a moan, licking at his lips while her confident movements
continued over him allowing him to fill her time and time again. “It scares me how much I love
you. I never want to lose you. You’re everything to me.”
“I promise you,” she hovered her lips in over Negan’s making him growl out while she braced her
hands in over the center of his naked chest. “Nothing is ever going to take me away from you. Not
now, not ever.”
 Chapter 17
Chapter Summary

After getting home from their honeymoon, Y/N discovers something that makes her
panic. Negan makes decision without involving Y/N and it puts tension on their early
marriage.

Sitting in the driveway of the home that Y/N shared with Negan now that they were married, she
felt her heart pounding inside of her chest. Curling her fingers firmly around the steering wheel she
knew that she had been sitting there for quite some time. Probably long enough that if someone
knew she was home they would have come out to see if she was okay. Jane and Elaina were visibly
over the house and she could tell that because their car was parked in the street out in front of their
house. As far as she knew, it wasn’t a planned visit, but thankfully they were there so Negan didn’t
notice that she was acting weird. A lot was on her mind and she needed that alone time to herself
before she braced herself to be able to see him.

There was so much she had changed about herself when she got with Negan. She thought
relationships were a joke and a waste of time, but being with Negan made her think differently
about things. Marriage was never a question in her mind before. Now here she was married to
Negan. There was so much she had planned in life, but since Negan had entered her life, things had
been so different for her. And that’s where she was right now. Lost in a moment of shock because
once again she was facing something that she never thought would happen.

Trying to coach herself into getting out of the car, Y/N muttered calming words hoping to convince
her nerves to calm down so she could just go into the house. In that moment, she gazed into the
rearview mirror to look at her parents’ house across the street. It made her think about how she had
given up her family completely in order to be with Negan. It wasn’t exactly her fault that happened.
Her father was never very supportive of her to begin with and he had been leading her down a very
toxic path in life. One that she knew that she didn’t want to follow. And it made her realize that she
needed to be the thing that she was longing for in life and not the robot that her father had been
training her to be. It was the best thing for her to separate herself from her father, but in the end she
wondered if it was the right decision. Right now, it made her think about her mother. More than
anything, her mother deserved better than her father, but she knew that her mother would never
leave him. But there was a longing to have her mother back in her life.

She told herself that she wouldn’t have regrets in life when she got with Negan, but right now she
was having a few. At her wedding to Negan, she wished she would have gotten the gusto to contact
her mother to ask her to come, but she didn’t because she was afraid with how her father would
react.

Reaching for her cell phone, she looked for her mother’s number and wrote her a text asking if they
could see each other without her father. She needed someone to talk to that wasn’t Negan.
Someone that would understand what she was going through.

It wasn’t that things were going wrong with Negan. He was perfect. The best husband that anyone
could have asked for. Since getting married, Negan had been leaving a rose on the pillow beside
her every morning when she woke up along with a handwritten letter. He was romantic. He was
perfect. In every way possible. Their honeymoon was the kind of honeymoon that anyone would
have dreamt about. She was married to someone who was perfect in every way possible and he
could give her a life that she could have only dreamt about in the past. It was just things were
moving so incredibly fast and she didn’t know how to handle it at times.

Looking to her phone again, she felt her heart racing seeing that her mother had read her message,
but not yet responded. It made her heart ache. She would understand why her mother wouldn’t
bother with her if that was her decision. There was a lot of anger that was likely coming from her
father and that made things hard.

There was a constant internal battle that Y/N was fighting with herself. It was the girl that her
father had forced her to be all those years and the person she knew she wanted to be. They were so
vastly different that sometimes that made life hard. It was like being two completely different
people, but Y/N knew that she wanted to be with Negan so badly. If her father found out she was
married to Negan, she could only imagine how disappointed he would have been in her. And now
that she was…no, she couldn’t think like that. Letting her father get into her mind would only make
things worse and that’s not what she needed right now. Especially in the situation she found herself
in.

Lately she debated if her and Negan should move so she didn’t have a constant reminder of her
parents across the street. Sometimes it made things complicated knowing that her family was right
across the street from her and wanted nothing to do with her. Though she didn’t want to force that
on Negan when he had only moved here so recently. Could he afford it? Yes, but she didn’t want to
already make demands so early in their marriage. If he was comfortable here, she wanted to be
comfortable here too. So she forced herself to try to convince herself that it wasn’t her parents that
lived across the street and it was strangers. Hell, she was probably a stranger to her parents now
that she was so different from the woman she used to be.

Swallowing down loudly, she managed to get herself out of the car and unhurriedly walked up to
the house. It actually made her nervous knowing that she would be with Negan. There was a talk
that she needed to have with him and she didn’t know if she would have the strength to do it. So
rushing was not something she was going to do in this moment.

When she pushed open the door, she could see that Negan was sitting by the chair near the
fireplace that was lit while Elaina and Jane were sitting talking with him. It made her thankful that
they were there because it gave her more time to coach herself through what she needed to say to
Negan. Clearly she had been ridiculously quiet with the way she entered the home because it drew
none of their attention. So she kept it that way for a moment letting her curiosity get the best of her
because the moment seemed rather serious between all of them.

“This time, it won’t be as casual as last time,” Jane spoke up and it made Y/N tip her head to the
side wondering what she had just walked into. Resting against the wall that was behind them, she
didn’t want to get involved in the conversation, but she was listening in. “Times have changed in
twelve years. People aren’t as ignorant, for now.”

“So it will be done in a medical building is what you are saying?” Negan confirmed and it made
Elaina laugh, but the comment baffled Y/N because she was not part of the things that they were
talking about.

“Obviously,” Jane snickered making Negan bob his head about like it wasn’t that obvious for him.
“I’m sorry, I don’t feel comfortable doing it the way that was done last time.”

“It worked last time,” Negan recalled making Jane groan out in almost a disgusted breath. “But I
understand what you are saying and all that shit. So yeah, okay. I’m sure we can figure something
out.”

“Just like that?” Jane questioned making Negan shrug his shoulders. “I thought there would be
some more thought or discussion about the whole thing.”

“I feel like we’ve talked enough, don’t you? You put out the reasons and it all made sense,” Negan
insisted with a grunt, rubbing his hands together and it made Y/N ponder what they were talking
about. “We’ll set something up and get it done. I don’t have a problem with it. It was smart to hit
me up during the summer so I have a free schedule. Were you thinking of doing it soon?”

“We were trying to plan out the time,” Elaina spoke up making Y/N shift on her feet wondering if
any of them had actually heard her enter Negan’s home. “Obviously, we both have very busy
schedules, but this is what Jane wants. I think with work, she has been there long enough that if she
wanted to take some time off, they would let her. But we both know Jane, she would work from
home as much as she could.”

“But when it gets to a certain point…” Negan looked to Jane who threw her hands up in the air.
“I’m just saying…”

“I know you’re good at putting your nose into things, but I know I would have to do my best to
keep everything healthy,” Jane interrupted Negan who snorted before reaching for the glass of
what Y/N assumed to be whiskey to drink it down. “I was just worried about this whole
conversation. I didn’t think you would be as open to it.”

“Why not?” Negan hissed when he finished off his drink and set the empty glass back down on the
table.

“Because you’re freshly married. It’s only been a few weeks and I don’t know, I figured you would
have a different view about things,” Jane was honest with Negan making Y/N feel uncomfortable
hearing that bit. What the hell was that supposed to mean? “We just thought you would say no.
Plus, I figured you would want to take some time to talk things out with Y/N. She is your wife now
and it’s kind of a big deal. I know I would want to talk things out with Elaina if I was in this
position.”

“I guarantee you she won’t mind,” Negan spoke up making Y/N clear her throat and step forward
drawing Negan’s attention to her. The two women looked back and Jane jumped when she saw that
Y/N had been there. With a comment like that, Y/N felt like she needed to make her presence
known. It was an accident that she scared Jane, but they were the ones that were too deep in their
conversation to realize that she had returned home. “Hey baby, when did you get in?”

“Not very long ago,” Y/N pointed toward the door and felt her heart skipping a beat. “You’ll have
to excuse my ignorance, but what are we talking about? I heard myself mentioned and you saying I
won’t mind. So, what won’t I mind?”

There was a silence that filled the air. All three of them looked between each other before looking
back at Y/N. the fact that none of them were speaking up immediately made her anxious and she
held her hand up in the air, “Negan?”

“The two of you obviously have some things to talk about,” Jane announced slowly pulling herself
up from the couch since she was visibly uncomfortable.

“We actually have to get going,” Elaina spoke up after looking at her watch, following Jane’s
footsteps in standing up from the couch. “I have to get back to work and Jane has to go get Sam.”
The fact they were ready to bail the moment she asked them what was up made Y/N perplexed.
That was a strange response to everything and she didn’t know how to reply. So she just stood
there frozen looking to Negan who looked drained and not really interested in getting into the
conversation with her yet.

Her attention was pulled away from Negan when Elaina stepped before her and reached out for a
hug. Instead of acting strangely toward her, Y/N accept the hug and felt nervous about the whole
situation, “I’m sorry for running out on you dear, but you know how time schedules are with this
job. It was good to see you.”

“It’s good to see you too, but…” Y/N looked between all of them that had stood up and she felt
uncomfortable. A groan fell from Negan’s throat at the other end of the room when he pulled
himself up from his seat where he was visibly comfortable originally. “Is someone going to tell me
what this conversation was about?”

“I’ll let you in on everything,” Negan offered heading toward the front of the house with Elaina
and Jane when they went for the door. Jane stopped at the door and stared out at Negan with her
dark eyes. It looked like she was thinking things over before stepping up on her toes to wrap her
arms around Negan’s shoulders to give him a big hug. “This is strange.”

“Don’t make things weird,” Jane half-laughed making Negan smile when he squeezed his arms
tighter around her.

“Twelve years hating each other makes this just…different,” Negan pulled back enough to look
down at Jane with an amused expression.

“Thank you, Negan,” Jane pressed a kiss against Negan’s cheek and confused was an
understatement right now with how Y/N was feeling about this whole thing. Jane moved back
enough to cup the sides of Negan’s face in her hands before offering up a weak smile. “You have
no idea how much this means to me.”

“Of course I know how much it means to you,” Negan gave her a wink and stepped back away
when they headed for the door. “Just let me know schedules and we will work something out for
the two of you.”

“I will,” Jane moved over to hug Y/N goodbye and Y/N didn’t want to be rude near Elaina or Jane,
but she was still so lost. After Jane hugged Y/N, it was almost like she noticed something was
going on with Y/N and she stopped herself from leaving. “Are you okay?”

“I’m…here,” Y/N couldn’t believe how perceptive Jane actually was. When she said that, Jane’s
fingers curled around hers and in that moment, she could tell that Jane was actually worried about
her. “Don’t worry about it, I’ll be okay.”

“Are you sure?” Jane made sure that things were fine and even though Negan often described Jane
as the hard ass, Jane was actually the one she seemed to click with better between her and Elaina.
With a nod, Y/N knew that if she kept looking Jane in the eyes that she would absolutely just melt
down in that moment and she was trying to hold herself together. With a sweep of her fingers over
Y/N’s cheek, Jane tried to be supportive in that moment knowing that Y/N was lying, but she was
going to accept the answer because she didn’t want to push it. “I guess we should head out. Call me
if you want to talk about things later.”

“Okay,” Y/N didn’t know what to say. She wasn’t used to people actually caring about how she
was and it made her feel bad. She was tense about whatever was being talked about with Negan,
but here Jane was clearly concerned about her.
When both women had left, Y/N could see Negan turn to face her with one of his charming, bright
smiles that drew attention to his gorgeous dimples. It seemed like he was trying to ease the
situation before they even talked about it by attempting to get her to swoon with the way he
looked. Unfortunately, it often worked, but that’s where she knew this was a deep conversation
that was a big deal. Negan stepped forward, his hands gradually sliding in over the sides of Y/N’s
hips when he tipped down, “Hey there gorgeous.”

Closing her eyes as Negan’s lips cascaded down over hers, Y/N felt him take her breath away with
the way that he kissed her. Somehow, he still managed to do that to her even though she had been
with him this long. When he pulled his lips from hers, he pressed their foreheads together before
nuzzling his nose against hers.

“How did things go?” Negan questioned making the lump that was in her throat grow. “You never
said what your appointment was. Was it to finish things up with school since you are going back
next semester?”

“Uh, no,” she shook her head, moving back enough to separate the two of them. It made her realize
that she had an actual objective before she came into the home with Negan. She forgot about her
own problems for a moment because she was thinking about whatever was going on with Elaina
and Jane over herself. “I mean, I’m already good with school. Next semester is set, I think…but…
before we talk about that, what was that conversation that I just walked in on at the end of?”

“Oh, it’s no big deal,” Negan blew it off with a simple shrug heading back over to the bottle of
whiskey that he had sitting out. Moving to his seat that was in front of the fire, he poured himself
another glass before taking a sip of it again. Uneasily, Y/N moved around the couch to sit down
across from Negan. “They wanted to ask me a question.”

“And what was that question?” her eyebrow arched seeing Negan hold out the glass of alcohol to
her, but she shook her head and denied it. “It seemed like something big. Especially with the way
that Jane reacted before she left. She was the only one that seemed to want to include me with
things. Whatever it was.”

“Well, they came here because they were thinking about things and they decided that they wanted
to have another child. This time Jane wanted to be the one to do it,” Negan stated setting his glass
back down on the table. It made Y/N’s eyes narrow and she slid forward on the couch.

“And how does that have anything to do with you?” Y/N pushed further making Negan’s lips part
and his eyebrows furrowed showing that he was confused at the way she was asking the questions.
“I mean, yeah, you’re Sam’s dad but they don’t need permission from you.”

“Oh, well…” Negan cleared his throat and rubbed his hands over his knees. Apparently, he seemed
to think that she would pick up on this whole thing quicker than she actually was and he didn’t
know the best way to explain things to her. “They want their children to be related. So, they wanted
me to donate sperm to them again so Sam and their child would be related to one another.”

“No fucking way,” she immediately snapped making Negan’s face scrunch up and it was visibly
obvious that he was surprised with her outburst. It made her furious that he actually didn’t even
think to consider her in this decision at all. This was a conversation that all four of them should
have been having. Not just the three of them and it made her angry. Her whole body felt like it was
on fire and she could tell that Negan didn’t think it was that big of a deal. “You’re not just some
single guy now Negan, you’re my husband. I can’t believe you agreed to that without asking me
first.”

“I’m sorry, but what?” Negan smirked, his deep raspy voice shocked that she was so upset with the
idea. “You’re telling me that I can’t donate my sperm to them?”

“That’s exactly what I’m telling you,” she stood up from the couch and paced around the living
room making Negan look up at her while she paced before him. “That’s very bold of them to come
and ask you that kind of thing when you just got married to me. We’re still getting comfortable
with one another and they decide now is the best time to come and do this?”

“It’s not that big of a deal. It makes sense in the long run. If something happens to them, they will
have the two children together and they will both be related. Plus, they know me. If they went with
someone else, they don’t know what they would have to put up with. They know my history, my
health…” Negan reasoned with her, throwing his hands up and about while thinking about what
the conversation was. “I don’t know why you seem so angry about this.”

“Because this was a conversation that should have been between the four of us,” she repeated out
loud what she was thinking in her head. Throwing her hands up, she couldn’t believe that Negan
was actually being so ignorant to things. “This is a big deal and I should have been involved. Jane
was right, you should have talked to me about things first.”

“But why can’t I do it?” Negan was still dumbfounded and she curled her fingers into fists at her
sides. “I don’t understand.”

“Because your sperm belongs to me,” she yelled back in a rebuttal making Negan snort and he
stood up from the chair to head over toward her. Forcing herself to turn away from him, she knew
that answer was ridiculous, but it was how she felt. When he approached and tried to touch her, she
turned around to shove her hands into the center of his chest making him stumble backwards.

“What the hell?” Negan grumbled showing that he obviously didn’t understand why this whole
thing was too much for her. “My sperm doesn’t belong to you. You don’t even want to have
children and I’ve respected that.”

“Who said I didn’t want to have children?” she replied back almost immediately making Negan
half smirk before shaking his head.

“You did. Multiple times. Hell, the fact you’re married to me is a shock itself because you didn’t
want to have a relationship or be married to anyone,” Negan reminded her of what she was like in
the past. “So I don’t see the problem.”

“The problem is that was then. Like you said, I’m not the person I was a few months ago,” she
tried to point out how much she had vastly changed in such a short amount of time. “I’m married to
you. I want us to start a life together.”

“We are,” Negan sighed, stepping forward to try to grab her hands in his, but she pulled them away
again making him let out a disappointed breath. “Baby, what is going on here?”

“I just don’t understand why you would agree to do something like this when you and Jane hate
each other,” she came up with the next thing she could try to get Negan to change his mind and she
could tell that by the look in his hazel eyes that he was lost with where she was trying to go with
this.

“Because we’re trying to be better with things. I think it makes sense for them to want to have
Sam’s sibling be related to her. Plus, if something ever happened to them, they know that I’m
here…” Negan pushed further since he was more understanding of this whole thing. “This time
things would be different than they were last time. I don’t understand why you are so upset by this
because you seem perfectly fine with Sam.”
“I love Sam and she’s in our life. She’s your daughter, but if you have a child with Jane that means
you are going to be part of that child’s life too. They are going to want you to spend time with that
child too. They won’t just send Sam over when she’s here because they wouldn’t want that child to
feel left out. So we would automatically be gaining another child and…” Y/N sounded like she was
having a meltdown in the way she was explaining things and Negan pushed his hands into his
pockets while he stared out at her. “This was something that you should have involved me in
before you decided that you were going to say yes.”

“Everything will be fine,” Negan pulled his right hand out and held it up to try to reason with her.
“And just putting this out there, my sperm does actually belong to me and it’s my decision who I
get to share it with. I’m not going to be having sex with anyone else, but if I choose to donate my
sperm to two people that I’m close to, I will.”

“You can’t do that,” she blurt out when Negan went to walk away, showing that he was obviously
upset with the conversation and where it was headed. “If you do that, then you are going to take
the attention away from…me.”

“What?” Negan cracked a smile, his face scrunching up in disbelief. “You’re going to be busy with
school. You’ll be fine. You’re still my wife and it’s not going to change anything between the two
of us. This time I know that the baby is solely theirs. It won’t change how things are Y/N. You
don’t have to worry about something like that.”

“I don’t think I’m going to be going to school Negan,” she corrected his statement making him let
out a defeated sound when he found them going in circles about this whole thing. “I don’t think I’m
going to be capable of things. The person that I wanted to be, I can’t be her anymore. Life has made
sure of that for me.”

“What does that mean?” Negan threw his hand up trying to understand what she was saying. “Did
they go back on their decision to let you back? Because if they did, I swear to God I will hire
whoever I have to in order to…”

“That’s not what I mean,” she cleared her throat, her hand sliding in over her lower stomach
making Negan’s jaw clench when he stared out at her. It was hard to get out what she wanted to
really say because she was so damn scared to actually say it out loud. “The appointment I had
today was with my doctor Negan. The reason I’m telling you that you can’t do this is because…it’s
because I’m pregnant. The reason I’ve been getting sick lately isn’t because of stress or motion
sickness. I’m pregnant with your child and…I need you. If you agree to do this with Jane, it will
take the attention away from our baby. The baby that is growing inside of me right now. I’m scared
enough as it is Negan. I need you to be focused on me. On us. On this baby.”

“You’re…you…” the color drained from Negan’s face and he looked down toward her abdomen
where she had her hand placed. Before he could even manage to get the question out, she nodded
and he swiftly moved across the room to wrap her up in his arms. A surprised sound fell from her
throat when Negan pulled her up off her feet to squeeze her in close to his chest. Over and over
again, Negan peppered her with kisses making her melt in against him. When she showed up today,
she was absolutely terrified and didn’t know how she was going to tell him, but his reaction to her
being pregnant made her less mortified knowing that he was obviously happy to hear the news.
When he set her back down to her feet, she felt a breath get caught in her throat when Negan
dropped down to his knees and his hands reached out to press in over her stomach. “You’re
pregnant?”

“Yeah,” she whimpered, swallowing down when Negan’s eyes swelled up with tears and he smiled
big. Lowering his head, Negan cuddled it in against her lower abdomen and she stroked her fingers
against the back of his neck.

“How far along?” Negan tipped his head back enough to look up at her and she stroked her thumb
over the side of his face to sweep away the tears that were over his flesh.

“A few months. I thought the birth control would be enough, but…” she bit down on her bottom
lip, brushing her fingers into Negan’s dark hair feeling her breath get taken away with the way that
Negan was crying hearing that he was going to be a father again. “Apparently you have really
strong sperm and they were determined to make a baby.”

With a shuddering breath, she felt Negan’s thick fingers pressing up in underneath the material of
her shirt to press it up toward her mid abdomen. Watching him, she felt like the room was spinning
around her when Negan palmed in over her abdomen before pressing warm kisses against her flesh.
Closing her eyes, she took in the feeling of his stubble covered cheek rubbing against her abdomen.

“I’m scared Negan,” she announced with a shuddering breath making Negan look up at her. With
ease, he got up from the ground and cupped her face in his hands lovingly. “I was supposed to go
back to school, but now I’m pregnant. It doesn’t fit at all into the plans that I made, but I can’t get
rid of it. It’s part of me…part of you…”

“You’ll still get to have your plans, it’s just…” Negan hushed her, stroking his fingers over her
jawline in a comforting way. “Now it’s just different, but I promise you that you will still be able to
achieve your dreams. I won’t let you fail.”

“What if I’m not going to be a good mom Negan? I only just started being an okay person,” her
bottom lip tremored and his head pressed to hers again. Wrapping her up in his arms, Negan tried
to get her to calm down and she knew that she was shaking. “I only just learned how to start loving
someone because of you and Sam.”

“You were always a good person Y/N,” Negan assured her, pressing a kiss against her temple
before resting his chin in against the top of her head. “Everything is going to be okay. I promise
you. I will do everything I can to help you. I’ll be the best father and husband. I’ll do everything I
can to keep you comfortable. I’ll take good care of you.”

“I know,” she confessed with a sigh knowing that Negan would undoubtedly be a good father. That
was the only thing that was making her not crumble. “I just don’t want to fail myself. I know that
you will be an incredible father, I just…I need you so much right now. I never in my life thought I
would be pregnant Negan. This is something the world obviously wanted because only one in ten
women get pregnant when they are on the pill. This baby was meant to be.”

“It’s our little miracle,” Negan caressed the back of his hand over her abdomen and took in a long
shallow breath. “I know that this is something new and it’s scary. Big life events are always scary
and if you weren’t scared, I would be worried about you, but I promise you…everything is going to
be okay.”

“I’m going to have to cancel my next semester of school. I can’t go being pregnant. They will look
down on me and treat me badly for being pregnant. These professors are so judgmental of women
to begin with,” she suggested seeing the way that Negan’s long eyelashes fluttered while she
explained things to him. There was a sense of disappointment in herself for letting this happen, but
at the same time she knew that she loved Negan and this was clearly meant to happen with the way
that things turned out. “I don’t know what I’m going to do. They just agreed to letting me back and
now I can’t go back because of this.”

“You can take some online classes if they have that option,” Negan offered trying to find a way to
help her out with things. “I’m sure there are some courses that you can do not on campus. You can
have the baby and then I promise you I will do the best I can to take care of the baby. You don’t
have to worry. You’re still going to achieve your dreams Y/N. I won’t let you fail.”

Leaning into Negan’s touch, she knew that she loved him enough to be comfortable with what he
was saying. It was just her past was fighting the new her so much harder than she ever expected it
to. Then again, she never expected to end up being pregnant. Especially not this early in her life.

“I don’t want you to have to take care of me for the rest of my life Negan,” she whimpered when
he drew his thumb over her bottom lip. “I know that you would, but I want to be able to be an equal
in this relationship. I don’t want to be someone that you have to pamper from here on out. I want to
be something.”

“And you will be something. I promise you of that,” Negan lowered down to bring their lips
together again. With his kisses he was able to calm her down before he picked her up in his arms. It
made her gasp when she hooked her arms around his shoulders to keep herself steady in his arms.
Moving over toward the couch, Negan sat down and pulled her in over his lap while he stroked his
fingers down over her jawline. “This is just another step in building our lives together. I promise
you, we’re going to have the best life together and you are going to know that you are loved.”

“I just don’t want to let you down,” she felt his other hand caressing in over her abdomen and she
placed her hand there. “I know that I can be good with Sam. She’s fun and sweet. I don’t know
about babies. I’ve never prepared for something like this.”

“Nothing ever prepares you for what it is like to have babies,” Negan whispered, his fingers
hooking with hers while she cuddled in closer to him. “It’s a scary thing, but I promise you it’s
going to be okay. We’re going to have a beautiful, perfect little family and we’re going to do it
together. I’ll never leave your side. I promise you.”

“Okay,” she whispered with a weak smile. “I love you, so much.”

“I love you too,” Negan repeated, nuzzling his nose in against hers. “I always will.”

“I swear, I didn’t think it would get this bad,” Y/N breathed out from where she was sitting at the
center of the bed when Negan entered the bedroom carrying a bowl in his hands. It was the middle
of the night so he was just in his boxer briefs looking disheveled after she had another craving
during the middle of the night. “The baby just really wanted some vanilla ice cream with peanut
butter and Oreos. It was not going to let me keep sleeping until it got it.”

“You gotta give the baby what it wants,” Negan smirked, hopping in the bed next to her when he
handed her over the bowl that he had brought with him. Pressing a kiss over her cheek, Negan got
comfortable in the bed beside her and stretched out his long legs. “I think I have the ratio right with
the peanut butter and the Oreos.”

“It’s perfect,” she hummed taking a bite of the ice cream that Negan had mixed together for her. It
had been a few months since she had told Negan that she was pregnant and things were working
out decently well. Jane and Elaina both agreed that now wasn’t the time for them to do what they
wanted with their baby when they found out that Y/N was pregnant. Negan still managed to get
Y/N to agree to letting him do it in the future, but she still didn’t know how well she would be able
to handle it now that they were actually married and Negan was her husband. But for now they
were happy just doing the best they could do. “I probably am disgusting to you with this big belly
constantly craving food all the time.”
“Fuck that,” Negan growled with a firm shake of his head when he gazed over at her. “There is
nothing sexier than seeing you with my baby growing inside of you. You are more gorgeous than I
have ever seen you in my whole life. Nothing turns me on more really.”

“You got issues,” she teased him when Negan got onto his knees and started pampering kisses over
her swollen stomach. “I hope you know that.”

“I have a pregnancy kink,” Negan growled against her flesh, kissing further up her body until he
went to kiss her and she shook her head. With a frown, she brought a spoonful of the ice cream up
for him and he happily accepted the bite. Licking his lips when he swallowed it down, Negan
hummed and shrugged his shoulders. “I really enjoy the sight of my wife pregnant with my child. It
turns me on and I think that’s a good thing.”

“Well I’m glad I’m not undesirable to you with this big stomach,” she watched Negan push up the
material of the shirt that she was wearing to look over her pregnant belly. With a huff, she watched
Negan dip his finger into the ice cream before she felt him drawing out a shape in over her
stomach. “Hey now…”

“Hush,” Negan pouted lowering down again to drag his tongue out over her flesh making her take
in a sharp breath. “You know how I feel about you.”

“I’ll never get sick of hearing it though,” she reminded him making an amused expression spread
out over his handsome features.

“I love you, so fucking much,” he hummed kissing at her swollen abdomen and it surprisingly took
her breath away. “To be honest with you, this all is very new for me too with you being pregnant.
It’s been one hell of a trip.”

“But you have Sam,” she declared making his eyes slowly lift up to hers from where he was
pressing butterfly kisses over her abdomen.

“But I wasn’t with Elaina when she was pregnant. We would visit with Elaina, but I’m actually
getting to experience the pregnancy of my baby with you,” Negan stated with another charming
smile and it made her smile. That was one thing about Negan. His smiles were so contagious that
even in the darkest of moments, he was capable of making someone smile. “It’s been a completely
different experience with you than it was with Sam.”

“Well, this one is probably going to be harder,” she frowned and Negan’s expression showed her
that he didn’t agree with her. “With Sam, you got to switch back and forth every few weeks with
Elaina and Jane. That’s not going to happen with this little one.”

“And I’m very happy about that. I’m ready to become sleep depraved because being a full-time
father is the thing I look forward to the most,” Negan winked, nestling his cheek in against her
stomach and again in a matter of seconds was able to make her swoon with the affection that he
had for their child already. “I will do whatever it takes. No matter what it takes.”

“If you would have told me a year ago that I would be married to you and super pregnant by this
time, I would have never believed you,” she blurt out making his eyes lift to gaze up at her before a
tiny smirk tugged at his handsome features. Kissing up her abdomen, his lips hovered in over hers
before claiming her mouth in a kiss. The taste of her ice cream lingered against her lips and it made
him chuckle when he pulled away. “What?”

“You taste sweet,” he licked at his lips and snickered when he laid in beside her again to get
comfortable. “I don’t think I would have believed a year ago that I would have been happily
married with a baby on the way either, but sometimes that’s how life works for you. You end up
being surprised in an amazing way.”

“This isn’t the life that I thought I would have,” she was honest with him after taking another big
scoop of her ice cream making Negan’s hazel eyes hook with hers.

“But that’s not necessarily a bad thing, is it?” Negan hummed, scooting in closer to her so he could
caress his palm in over her swollen abdomen. When the warmth of it pressed in over her flesh, she
let out a surprised breath when the baby growing inside of her kicked. “There he is.”

“It’s like he knows when it’s you,” she couldn’t but find herself in awe of Negan with the way he
stared down at her pregnant belly. “When your hand is there, he lets you know that he wants to be
near you. You have a way with kids.”

“I do my best,” Negan hummed pressing his forehead to hers after she set the bowl aside that he
had given her of ice cream. Her hand slid in over his and she felt the coolness of his wedding band
beneath her fingers. “I love you both so much.”

“We love you too,” she responded feeling herself getting caught up in the moment and she
shuddered. “I’m glad that Sam is okay with this whole thing. I thought she would be upset that she
would be losing out on time with her father.”

“It just gives us something to bond over. I told you she was an incredible little girl,” Negan
informed her with a wink, a loud sigh falling from his parted lips. “She’s happy at the idea of
getting to have a little brother. I think the idea of being a big sister to her is very appealing. You’ve
seen all the outfits she has had me buy for him. She’s going to pamper the shit out of him and show
him off. She’s proud. Just like me.”

“She’s the best daughter I could have asked for,” she brushed her fingers through Negan’s hair
knowing that she considered Sam her daughter at this point. When she was around Elaina and Jane,
she was careful to use that term around them knowing that she was Sam’s stepmother, but she
wanted to make it clear to Negan that she considered Sam her daughter already. “I’m going to
sound really pathetic with this one, but I’m glad that our baby is a boy.”

“Why is that?” Negan’s face scrunched up, his nose wrinkling in amusement. “I think we’d make a
beautiful baby girl.”

“Oh, I agree. We’d have a beautiful little girl, but with you agreeing to be the father to Jane’s baby
in the future, I assumed Jane would be the first one to give you a boy,” she stated making Negan tip
his head to the side wondering where she was going with that. “I just am glad my baby will help
carry the Smith name on for you.”

“Oh,” Negan snickered with a shake of his head before a wicked smirk tugged at his lips. “So that
means you’ve reconsidered naming him Negan? You’re going to let me have a Negan Junior,
right?”

“Negan,” she huffed making him chuckle against the side of her neck when he nuzzled his nose
against her. “You actually like your name like that?”

“I mean, yeah, it’s unique,” Negan stammered with a rumble, his head lifting up enough to stare out
at her. “But that’s kind of what makes it cool, right? Plus, if we get confused you can just call him
Junior. Or if we want to call him Negan, you can just call me daddy. You do already.”

“Oh, funny,” she rolled her eyes, swatting playfully at the back of his chest with her hand. “I’ll
consider it.”

“That’s better than no,” Negan spoke up with a big cheesy smile making her shake her head. “I
wouldn’t have cared whether our baby was a boy or girl by the way. I would have loved it with all
of my heart regardless.”

“I know,” she acknowledged, never doubting that from Negan. “There are a lot of things in life that
I doubt, but you being a good father is not one of them. I fully believe that you will keep up on your
promises that you gave me.”

“I’m glad you have that faith in me,” Negan hovered his lips in over hers, eager to kiss her when he
had the chance making her smile against the kiss. “I want to be the best father and husband. I want
to do this right and pamper the hell out of my family. I want nothing more to than to be a good
father and this little man gives me the chance to finally do everything right.”

“I love you,” she palmed down over the side of his chiseled jawline, tracing her fingers through the
short beard over his face. “You are perfect in every way imaginable. You make me happy. What
you’ve been doing with your letters every morning and the flowers…you’re like a walking,
breathing romance novel. People only dream of being with someone like you.”

“I just want you knowing how much I love you,” Negan nuzzled his nose against hers and sighed
when her fingers sank into his dark hair. “I know that life has been hard for you. I know that your
father made you think life had to be a certain way, but I want to make sure that I spend every day of
my life proving to you how much I love you. I know that you decided to take a chance on life with
me, turning your back on the way that you grew up thinking things should be. So I want to make
sure you know how loved you are and how I plan to show you love. Endless amounts of it. I want
you to feel special like you should have always been treated your whole life. You’re perfect. You’re
amazing and I’m so happy that I am yours.”

“God, you make me fall in love with you even more every time I hear you talk,” she curled her
fingers around the back of his neck to pull her lips to hers. They kissed over and over again and she
knew that was something she could always get lost in with Negan. The way he kissed could always
make her feel like she was on top of the world. She was happy that Negan was hers and that they
would be spending forever together. “I still have that thought in the back of my mind that you
deserve better than me. Like I’m not good enough for you.”

“And yet, here you are wearing my ring and carrying my baby,” Negan pointed out, stroking his
fingers over the rings that were on her finger making her smirk. “I’m yours and I’m always going to
be yours. No matter what you have my heart in your hand and it’s going to remain there until the
end of time.”

“You are so fucking romantic. Where did you come from? You’re like a swearing, naughty little
angel,” she purred leaning forward to pepper kisses against his lips making him laugh. Negan gave
her an arrogant bob of his head and his smile made her swoon. “You’re the perfect amounts of
naughty, sweet, romantic, cheeky…I think I might love you.”

“You think?” Negan tickled playfully at her flesh making her wiggle beside him. “You think you
might love me?”

“Alright, it might be a little bit more than think,” she giggled while he peppered kisses against the
side of her neck. Bracing her hand in over the center of Negan’s chest, she managed to push him
back onto the center of the bed. Reaching for the bowl she deposited, she could see that the ice
cream that was left had melted somewhat while they were talking. Being careful with the way that
she moved, she crawled in over his lap and tipped the bowl allowing some of the melted ice cream
to pool out over the center of Negan’s chest making him gasp out. His back arched, but she pressed
her hand over the center of his abdomen to get him to lower back down. “You don’t want this to
spill onto the bed baby. You love your sheets.”

“Like we haven’t gotten sheets messy before,” he snorted with a wrinkle of his nose, tipping his
head down enough to look where melted ice cream started to drip down over his slender abdomen.
“I don’t mind getting sticky for you.”

“Something tells me that I could pretty much get you to do anything for me,” she acknowledged
with a chuckle bracing her hands on the bed when she lowered down. Kissing at the center of his
chest, she heard a breath getting caught in his throat while she licked at the sweet treat she had
poured over his flawless skin. “I wonder how it is I got so lucky to have you.”

“You say that now, but when you’re in labor I think you are going to change your mind on that
one,” Negan teased her, his fingers caressing over her shoulders while she continued to kiss down
over his abdomen to make sure she cleaned his body of the sticky treat he brought her tonight.
With a smirk, she lifted her head and gave him an odd glance. “What?”

“I’m about to give you a blowjob and that’s where you have the conversation go?” she teased him
with an arch of her eyebrow making him smirk. Negan curled his left arm behind his neck while
his right hand continued to caress over her shoulders.

“Well you didn’t tell me that you were going to give me that,” Negan snickered, his amused
expression making her laugh when she shook her head and placed another kiss over the center of
his chest.

“Right because I just drizzled the melted ice cream over your body because I got sick of the bowl,”
she scoffed making Negan laugh out loud. Kissing across his chest, she twisted her tongue around
his nipple and faintly nipped at the flesh making his back arch up from the bed with a gasp.
“You’re a goof.”

“Little bit,” Negan winked, brushing his fingers through her hair. “I love you so much, you know
that?”

“Say it again,” she instructed making Negan smile brightly and he nodded his head a single time.

“I love you so fucking much,” he repeated making her chuckle before crawling further up to meet
his lips in a passionate kiss with his fingers curling in over the side of her neck with his thumb
caressing up and over her jawline.

“I’ll never get sick of hearing you say that,” she whispered against his flesh, taking her time to kiss
him. Nothing felt better than being wrapped up in his arms and being able to kiss him like this.
With a huff, she pulled her lips from his making him frown. “I have to pee.”

“I take it that means no more blowjob?” Negan frowned watching her pull up from the bed making
her laugh as she headed for the restroom.

“Blame your child that just felt the need to full on dropkick me in the bladder,” she waved her hand
in the air making Negan snort before she ran off to the restroom. When she got back, Negan was no
longer in the bedroom and she noticed that the bowl was picked up from the nightstand. Heading to
the opened door, she noticed the hallways were still dark and called out to him. “Negan?”

“In here,” Negan responded and by the sound of his voice she knew that he was in the room that
they were setting up as the nursery for their baby. Cautiously heading in the direction, she opened
the door and braced her body against the doorframe seeing that Negan was holding one of the
stuffed animals that they had put inside of the crib. Oliver was laying down in the corner of the
room after obviously waking up and following Negan. Gazing back over his shoulder, Negan gave
Y/N a weak smile and saw her eyes hooked on him. “Sorry honey. I was just thinking about the
baby. It’s going to be here in no time you know.”

“I’m aware. I went from being normal to looking like I had an alien growing inside of me,” she
pointed toward her abdomen making Negan smirk before unhurriedly placing the stuffed animal
back inside of the crib.

“Oh stop,” Negan grumbled with a chuckle, turning on his heel wiggling his finger at her to have
her move out to him. Curling his arm around her, he pulled her in closer to him and caressed over
her baby bump with the back of his hand. “You are everything to me. You, Sam and this baby.”

After Negan said that, Oliver lifted his head up from the ground and let out a huff making them
both laugh, “And Oliver too.”

“Can’t believe you forgot him,” she teased Negan playfully poking him in the ribs before he leaned
forward to nuzzle his nose in against hers. “You mean everything to us too. I just hope you don’t
get sick of me.”

“Never,” he breathed against her lips, the warmth of his lips skimming in over hers making her let
out a shuddering exhale. “You helped me believe in second chances Y/N. Everything about you
gives me a second chance in life. To be a good husband. To be a good father. To do everything
right.”

“Are you starting to panic?” she inquired making him nod and she shook her head. “If anyone
should be worried, it’s me. I’m the one that’s never been a parent or been married. I’m the one that
is really bad at this whole relationship thing. How can someone so perfect think badly of
themselves?”

“Because I’m far from perfect,” Negan was honest, lifting his hand to brush his fingers in over the
side of her face. “I was never perfect. You give me too much credit because you love me. I’m
broken and I carry a shitload of baggage with me. I worry about the man I used to be so much
because I just want to make you happy. That’s what is most important to me. Having you happy.”

“I’m happy,” she assured him with a nod reaching her hand up to hook her fingers with his. “You
make me happy. Which trust me, it’s surprising since I’m peeing every twenty minutes and I’m
this crazily swelled. I never wanted to have children or to be pregnant. Especially this young. You
know me, this is against everything I was when you met me. There is no one in this world I would
rather spend my life with. I look forward to a future with you because you make me feel safe. I
believe in a future. I see one with you. That has to say a lot about the kind of man that you are
Negan. I wanted to focus solely on school. I wanted to get my law degree and be one hell of a
kickass lawyer.”

“And you still will be,” Negan slurred, his thumb drawing out in over her bottom lip when he
sighed loudly. “I promise, you will still get to live your dreams with me by your side. We’re just
adding to the dream right now. Bringing another little person along with us.”

“I hope so,” she bit down on her bottom lip wondering if she would be able to achieve everything
now that she was going to be a mother. “I just hope I make you proud.”

“You already do,” Negan hushed her, pressing his forehead to hers. “You never have to worry
about that.”
“I guess it’s a good thing I started a relationship with my mother again. At least I know I will have
some help with this baby,” she thought back on the last few months and how hard she worked to
repair her relationship with her mother. It didn’t take much. It was just stressing to her mother how
everything was and she understood that Y/N didn’t want her father back in her life. “It’s nice
getting to spend time with her again. I just always worry about my father and having him change
her mind on things.”

“If the time comes where that happens, we’ll take care of it,” Negan commented knowing that it
was a topic that Y/N often worried about. “Just think about the good things right now. Your
mother is back in your life, we’re close to having our baby…we’re happy. You’re on the path of
happiness and that’s what matters. It’s probably best for the both of us not to worry about what
could go wrong. Because fuck…I’ve done that most of my life and it gets you nowhere. Trust me
on that one.”

“Okay,” she tipped up on her toes to press a lingering kiss against his lips. “Thank you. For
everything. For believing in me, giving me a new life.”

“I should be thanking you,” he slurred with another wink, letting out a surprised breath when he
placed his large hand in over her swollen abdomen and felt the baby kicking against his touch.
“You’ve given me everything I’ve ever wanted in life. And I love you. So very much.”
 Chapter 18
Chapter Summary

Twelve years in the future, Y/N is in the relationship that everyone dreams of. Negan
is a dedicated husband, a wonderful father and she has the job of her dreams, but life
still isn't exactly what she hoped it would be.

Chapter Notes

Yes, this is a time jump story. There is a lot of angst in this chapter and there is a
moment in the chapter that could be viewed as maybe a moment of dubious consent.
Pre-warning. Thanks to anyone that still reads this. I'm looking to end it as soon as I
can. Maybe four to five more chapters left?

If there was one thing that Y/N longed for, it was rest. The good kind of rest that had become
unknown to her over the last few years. With how busy she had been, sleep had been something
she had learned to live without. Unfortunately, it felt like the only time she could get that sweet,
addictive relaxation where she actually felt comfortable was the last thirty minutes before her
alarm went off and woke her up to start her day. It was always so hard when she heard that alarm
go off. It was safe to say she had a lack of sleep, so the warmth of the comforters and the silence at
the beginning of the morning was so damn addictive.

It was the start of the morning and the sunrise had started to shine through her window leaving a
warmth radiating over her face while she laid in her bed. It felt nice. That was until the wet, damp
heat of something dragged across the center of her face. Groaning out, she pulled her head back
with a disgusted sound. Opening her eyes she saw that their golden retriever Oliver was laying on
the bed beside her with his big brown eyes gazing over her.

Lifting her head, she looked to see that the door was partially open to their bedroom. When Negan
got up this morning, he must have not closed the door completely allowing Oliver to sneak back
into the bedroom with her after Negan let him outside. Sighing loudly, she grunted out when she
felt the weight of something else jumping in over her on the bed. Putting her hands up, she tried to
block her face when their other dog jumped up on the bed with Oliver to cover her with kisses.

“Cooper!” Y/N firmly spoke the other golden retriever’s name making the younger dog lower
down to lay down on top of her and rest his head over the center of her chest looking up at her with
expressive eyes.

Frowning, she pet both of the dogs thinking about how many times she asked Negan to stop
allowing the dogs to hop in the bed with him. Multiple times in fact. Yet, it wasn’t something that
Negan ever firmly put down in the rules with the dogs so they felt free in hopping in the bed all the
time. It wasn’t something that she could be mad at them for since Negan really never stressed it.
After a small amount of time Cooper hopped down from the bed and ran out the door leaving her in
bed with Oliver.
“How’s it going old man?” she whispered, brushing her fingers over the softness of Oliver’s ears
making him lower his head in closer to her so she could press a kiss over his forehead. “I can’t
believe you made the trip up the stairs to wake me up.”

Oliver pulled himself in closer to her so he could have her wrap him up in her arms to give him a
big hug while she took time to still lay in bed with him. Her eyes lifted to see that on the pillow
where Negan slept was a rose and a note placed at the center of the pillow for her. It made her
swallow down hard and close her eyes.

Reaching out, she grabbed for the letter and lazily opened it up to look at what was written inside.

Y/N,

Waking up seeing your face is still the greatest joy of my life even after twelve years being married
to you. You have no idea how proud I am of you and I love you so fucking much.

Negan

Closing the note up, she heard the sound of her alarm going off and she exhaled loudly. Pulling
herself up in the bed, she heard Oliver adjusting his positioning so he could watch her moving
around the room. Picking up the flower from her pillow, she went over to the vase that she had in
her bedroom and dropped that rose in with the rest of them. Going to her top drawer, she pulled it
open and placed the note where she had the others. From the day that Negan married her until now,
Negan always left her a flower and a note on the pillow every morning. Twelve years straight, he
never broke the habit and made sure to do it.

Looking at her drawer, she could see that the notes were starting to pile up again and she would
have to put them in with the others that she had in storage. Shaking her head, she pushed the drawer
shut and looked to the ramp that Negan had made for Oliver since he was getting older and having
a hard time getting up on the bed with them. It made her snort and shake her head. So much for not
allowing the dogs on the bed.

“You’re lucky I love you,” Y/N muttered seeing Oliver’s ears perk up. The smell of breakfast
being cooked flooded into the room and she could see Oliver lift his nose up to smell the air. “You
wanna go have some breakfast together before we start the day?”

Oliver carefully pulled himself up from the bed and walked down the ramp taking his time.
Following Oliver out of the bedroom, she went with him down the stairs and could hear laughing
and giggling coming from the kitchen. Making her way through the home, she gazed around the
big living room that they shared with their family and knew that this house should have made her
happy. It was incredibly nice. It was big. It was beautiful. It was everything she dreamt of growing
up. It was definitely something to be proud of and Negan did a good job keeping it clean for them.

A wince fell from her throat when she stepped on something that made her pull her foot up
immediately to see that she stepped on a Lego making a slew of curse words fall from her lips,
“Negan!”

“What?” two voices called out from the kitchen making her huff out and drop down to sit on the
edge of the couch that was there.

“Negan Junior,” she corrected her statement knowing that there were a lot of times she hated
agreeing to let Negan name his son after him. It left for moments of confusion like this where both
of them would respond and it often frustrated her.
“Yeah mom?” their son popped his head out from where he was in the kitchen, his hazel eyes
staring out at her from where he was. His big dimples sank in and his eyes grew wide when he saw
her holding onto her foot. It was the same exact look she saw in Negan plenty of times and it blew
her away with how much her son actually looked like Negan but younger.

“You’re eleven Negan, don’t you think that you should be picking these up when you’re done?”
Y/N asked of her son making his head tip to the side and he stepped forward into the room with
her. “These things hurt.”

“I could tell by the swearing,” Negan Junior admitted, his young features gazing over her when he
started picking up the random Legos that were on the floor. “These were actually Isabella. We
were playing this morning and when I went to go help dad with breakfast, she was the one that was
supposed to pick them up.”

“Hey!” their daughter called out from the kitchen making Negan Junior smirk when he put
everything away.

“Which hey mom, I told you that you could call me NJ. It’s easier that way, if you want,” her son
suggested making her sigh when he stood before her and held his hand out to her to help her up
from the couch. “That nickname works for me. It makes me sound cool. Nicknames on dad would
just sound weird.”

“I can think of a few,” Y/N commented feeling NJ’s fingers curling around hers as he led her
toward the kitchen. Once they reached the kitchen, she heard laughter from inside seeing that
Negan was seated at the table feeding their youngest daughter Avery breakfast. A raspberry sound
fell from Avery’s lips when Negan tried to feed her some fruit.

“I don’t think she likes it daddy,” Isabella commented, her amused sounds flooding the air when
she watched the disgusted face press in over her little sister’s face with Negan attempting to feed
her. “She just doesn’t like blueberries like we do.”

“It’s a texture thing honey. You didn’t like it either when you were her age,” Negan looked back
over his shoulder to see that Y/N was standing at the entrance of their kitchen with NJ. Giving a
tired smile, Negan’s dimples sank in and she could see that he already had some blueberry stains on
the white tank top that he was wearing from him feeding their two-year-old going awry. Negan’s
graying hair was messy showing that he had likely just gotten up and went straight to work in the
morning getting their children ready for the day. NJ was pretty good at getting ready for the day
with him being almost twelve, but Isabella who was eight and Avery who was two still needed that
constant attention from them. “Good morning beautiful.”

“Ew,” Avery muttered with a loud swallow making Negan laugh, his nose wrinkling in amusement
when he turned back to look at Avery. After being dramatic likely for the attention that she was
getting from the giggles that Negan, NJ and Isabella were giving, Avery looked to Y/N with her
big hazel eyes and smiled. “Hi mommy.”

“Hey baby,” Y/N watched NJ run back to his spot at the table to go back to his breakfast. Y/N’s
spot was already set at the table and she headed over there after NJ got settled. While Negan fed
Avery, Isabella helped to feed Negan hearing them laughing and giggling together while the three
of them interacted. Poking at her breakfast, Y/N felt her throat tightening and gazed over her
family. While she was aware of the fact that she was lucky, sometimes her brain often got to
thinking. She should have been happy because all three of her children were healthy. They were all
good kids, they were raised right and she was proud of them. Yet, having three children was
something she would have never imagined growing up. One was scary enough for her when she
ended up being pregnant with Negan Junior. Now three kids later, sometimes she found herself
overwhelmed. Avery was an accident. Something that wasn’t planned. Heaven knows how she
came at an awful time. It was a time in Y/N’s career where she shouldn’t have been taking off work
because she had just become a partner at the firm and it felt inappropriate having to leave because
she had accidentally gotten herself pregnant. In the eyes of society, she had the perfect life. A
beautiful house, a doting husband who was incredibly loyal and a good father. She had a successful
career and the life that most people hoped for. So maybe she was a bad person, but sometimes she
thought about the life she wanted before she got with Negan. Back then she dreamt of having her
career, maybe settling down now and having a kid or two. Not three with two stepchildren. Five
children in her life was a lot. Of course Sam was twenty-four now and Jane’s son Noah was ten. So
she only really had to worry about putting a majority of her effort into four of them. Sam was off
living her own life right now and while Y/N loved her family, sometimes she longed for that life
that she wanted growing up. It was a constant reminder her father still put in her head when she saw
him in passing. Her mother was very supportive of her life, but her father never grew out of it and
sometimes, she understood why.

“You okay?” Negan called out from across the table, chewing at the mouthful of food that Isabella
had just given him pulling Y/N from her own thoughts that she was lost in. With a nod, she looked
down at her plate and started to finally eat. Negan nodded slowly before getting a bite together for
Avery who shook her head when he lifted it up for her to eat. “Come on baby.”

“Daddy, dance,” Avery clapped her hands together making Negan shake his head and smile when
he lowered the forkful of food he had for her. “You dance, I eat.”

“I have a feeling you’re going to be a lawyer like your mama when you get older,” Negan wiped
his hand off on the napkin that was before him. Getting up from the table, Negan called out for
Alexa to play a song and when something came on Negan started wiggling his hips to the music
being over dramatic in the way that he moved making all the kids laugh while they watched him. It
was something Negan often did to make the kids laugh. Dance like a fool and they loved it.
Avery’s giggles filled the kitchen while she clapped her small hands together. Reaching out for
Isabella, Negan pulled her up from her seat and brought her with him to dance with her making her
laugh with Negan spinning her around the kitchen. Soon Negan reached for NJ to include him in
on the dancing and she watched from where she was seated enjoying that her kids found happiness
in their father’s antics, but at the same time sometimes she just wished they could have a normal
breakfast for once. It was always some form of entertainment that Negan would put on for them.
Pointing out at Y/N, Negan wiggled his finger at her and she immediately shook her head. “Come
on.”

“No,” she responded letting out a huff when Negan moved across the kitchen to grab a hold of her
hand to pull her up from the chair and toward his chest. She was very stiff but allowed him to spin
her and dip her knowing that the kids enjoyed it. Toward the end of the song, Negan picked up
Avery to include her, holding onto her so that she was with Y/N and him while they danced
together. As the song ended, Y/N lowered down to press a kiss over Avery’s head. “Time to eat
baby.”

“Okay,” Avery smiled bright, her chubby cheeks drawing attention to her beautiful smile as Negan
got her settled back down in her chair.

Watching from her seat, Y/N saw the way that Negan and the kids talked about their day together.
There was no questioning that Negan was their primary caregiver and she knew that, but work
made it hard for her to be in that position.

“And all of your homework is done?” Negan confirmed with their son seeing him eagerly nod his
head. “Promise?”
“Of course, I did it after dinner yesterday. Remember?” NJ pointed out making Negan nod his head
slowly. “That’s how we always do it. Homework after dinner and as soon as that’s done, we can do
whatever we want.”

“Yes sir,” Negan winked making NJ smirk. “Are you excited about the game tonight?”

“Very!” NJ boasted holding his fork in his hand while he spoke, his hazel eyes full of excitement.
“It’s the semifinals. If we win, we go to the finals. Which would be really cool. Maybe I’ll be good
enough like you were when you were younger dad and I can be a ball player.”

“With how good you are, I think you’re capable of anything,” Negan gave his son a wink making
Y/N swallow down hard hearing that her son wanted to be a professional baseball player.

“You want to make sure that you have a fallback plan kiddo,” she spoke up making NJ look back
at her with a confused expression. “I know you love baseball, but your dad was really good at
baseball and he ended up getting injured which stopped his career at nineteen. Now look at your
dad, he’s a gym teacher and a high school coach.”

“And I love my job,” Negan piped in, his thick eyebrows furrowing when he tipped his head to the
side and she could tell that it looked like he may have found that to be a bit of an insult slung in his
direction. “If it doesn’t work out for NJ, he will find something that does.”

“You’re a great coach dad,” NJ blurt out reaching out to grab a firm hold of Negan’s wrist to
squeeze it firmly. “I would have never been able to get as good as I am without you.”

“The talent is all you little man,” Negan leaned across the table to press a quick kiss against NJ’s
temple before sitting down back with Avery in attempts to get her to finish her breakfast.

“Is Jane bringing Noah tonight?” NJ questioned with a mouthful of his breakfast making Negan
nod his head. “I feel bad his team didn’t do as well this year, but I was hoping we could all go out
for ice cream later together.”

“Of course we can do that with the team and everyone. I think Sam is coming too,” Negan
responded letting out a groan when Isabella hopped down from her seat to jump into his lap.
Adjusting her in his lap, Negan made sure that he could still take care of Avery while cuddling his
daughter in his arms. “I’m sure she would love to come for ice cream too.”

“Are you coming mom?” NJ looked to Y/N with his big, hopeful hazel eyes. It made her feel
uncomfortable with all of the eyes on her and she felt her body tensing up. “Maybe you can get off
work early and come to the game?”

“Baby, you know that I can’t do that,” Y/N felt an overwhelming sense of guilt seeing the look of
disappointment in NJ’s eyes when he nodded his head and went back to poking at his breakfast. “I
would love to come to a game, but this case I’m working on is very important. With me being a
partner now with the company, I’m just busy a lot and…”

“Being a partner means you’re in charge, right?” NJ muttered, his young features gazing up at her
making a lump grow in her throat. “Doesn’t that mean you make your own hours?”

“Buddy, it’s not like that. See your mama is like a superhero. She works really hard to represent
people. All the work she does makes sure that bad guys don’t get out into the world and do bad
things,” Negan tried to defend Y/N in a way that would help NJ understand why she couldn’t be
there for his games. “I know your mama wants to be there more than anything, but her job is very
important.”
“But you make it to every game no matter what,” NJ replied with a long sigh shrugging his
shoulders as he spoke. “Mom hasn’t made it to one single game.”

“That’s because daddy’s job isn’t as important as mommy’s,” Y/N blurt out making Negan
swallow down hard when he stared out at her from across the table. With a sigh, Negan pressed a
kiss over the side of Isabella’s face and went back to whispering things to Avery. “Your dad is your
coach. He’s not going to miss your games. Plus he’s a gym teacher and coaches other teams. His
schedule is nothing like mine. Your father can afford to spare the hours, I can’t.”

“It would just be nice to have you at some of our events,” Isabella spoke up from her position at
the table, twisting her dark hair around her finger when she gazed over at her mother with her
bright hazel eyes. It was incredible how much the kids actually took on Negan’s genetics with their
eyes, coloring and dimples. “Daddy makes it to all of our events.”

“That’s because daddy has a shitty job that means nothing in the long run,” Y/N blurt out making
Negan’s face drain completely of color when he stared out at her with his eyebrows furrowed.
“Your father has incredible amounts of money that was given to him by your grandfather. Your
daddy never has to work in his life if he wanted to. So that’s why your daddy is able to do
everything that he does.”

“Y/N…” Negan breathed out, his voice raspy and quiet when he pulled her attention to him and
away from the kids. “Is everything okay?”

“I just don’t understand,” NJ didn’t allow his parents the time to have that conversation that was
very negative but all of the children were too young to pick up on what their mother really just said
about their father. “My friends have parents that are doctors. Elaina is a doctor and she shows up to
a lot of Noah’s games. Jane shows up and she travels all the time. Maybe you can make it to this
one game for me mom.”

“Well I’m sorry I can’t be as good of a mother as both Elaina and Jane,” she snapped feeling a bit
offended by her son’s comments comparing her to the other women that were in their lives. “When
I’m on a case NJ I can’t just decide when I can and cannot put time into it. Otherwise, mommy
would have never made partner in the amount of time that I did.”

“I know, I just think that at your job even if you did a few cases less than you do they would still
like you. You should just…” NJ went to bicker more with his mother only for Negan to reach out
and place his hand in over NJ’s wrist in order to get him to look at him. The two of them shared a
look and NJ frowned, lowering his head. “Sorry mom. I know your job is more important than a
stupid baseball game.”

“Hey,” Negan muttered with a frown noticing the extra added negativity that NJ put with his
comment.

“No, don’t correct him on that. He’s right. My job is more important,” she stated making Negan’s
eyebrows bounce up when she so blatantly said it. “Let me explain something to you Negan Junior.
Your baseball games will continue until you’re eighteen and then if you’re lucky and you do get to
be a baseball player into your adult years they will keep going. I don’t show up for my job and I
lose it. I lose a case and a bad guy gets away with doing something bad. So yes, I will pick my job
over your baseball games because in comparison they are nowhere near as important. If that hurts
your feelings, I don’t know what to tell you kiddo.”

A silence filled the kitchen when NJ’s face turned red and his head lowered down to look at the
table. His dimples sank in before he firmly pushed away from the table and ran out of the kitchen
making it obvious by the sounds that he was making that he was crying. A disappointed sound fell
from Negan’s throat when Isabella wiggled out of Negan’s arms and went to chase after her older
brother.

“Was that necessary?” Negan questioned, his Adam’s apple bouncing in his throat when he stood
from his seat and reached for Avery to pick her up from her seat into his arms. “He is still eleven
Y/N. All you had to do was tell him that his games were important too.”

“Sorry I can’t be the almighty hero that his dad is,” Y/N leaned back in her chair and folded her
arms in front of her chest. “Nothing I say is right, but everything you do is.”

“I tell the kids how important your job is Y/N and I do nothing but tell them how much you love
them. How amazing you are,” Negan reminded her with a shake of his head hearing the dogs
leaving the kitchen in search of the kids. “As you said, I’m no where near as important as you are.
But don’t worry about it. I’ll fix this. Just finish your breakfast and get ready for work.”

“I’m not a bad guy for working Negan,” she asserted seeing the muscle flex at the corner of his jaw
and Negan gave her a firm nod. “NJ thinks I’m a villain because I can’t make it to his games and
his school events. I don’t have that kind of job Negan.”

“He just loves you and he wants you there Y/N,” Negan maintained squeezing Avery in closer to
him when she rest her head against the center of his chest. Stroking his fingers through her dark
hair, Negan shrugged his shoulders and was at a loss for words. “It’s when he no longer cares that
you have to worry.”

With that Negan walked out of the kitchen leaving her alone to her breakfast. Sitting at the chair,
she lowered her head into her palm and thought about what her father told her in the past about
family getting in the way of success. In a way he wasn’t wrong. It did. She was surprised that she
was as successful as she actually was. The only reason she managed to make it as far as she did
was because Negan kept his promise. He was there to make sure she got everything she wanted in
life and that meant picking up the pieces of their family when she couldn’t.

Finishing her breakfast, she picked up the rest of the dishes and gathered them at the sink before
heading upstairs to get ready for work. Stopping at NJ’s bedroom door, she could see that the door
was partially opened and she could see that Negan and the kids were sitting on his bed together.
Giggles were filling the air while Negan tickled at his sides and the other kids joined in.

“Stop,” NJ blurt out between large gasps of air making Negan snort with the deep belly giggles that
were falling deep from within him. After they stopped tickling him, NJ reached out to wrap his
arms tightly around Negan’s shoulders to hug him. “Thanks dad. I love you.”

“I love you too buddy. So very much,” Negan stroked his fingers through NJ’s hair before
wiggling his fingers at the others to get them in for a big group hug and Y/N felt her chest
tightening. Being at work all the time definitely made it so that she wasn’t as close to the children
as Negan was. There was a bond he had with the three of them that she never would and she
understood that. Her job was her dream since she was younger. Everything else she had was just
the extras in her life and she was doing her best to balance it, but she knew she never would be able
to be a parent like Negan could.

Heading back to the bedroom she got ready for work and before she left, she got hugs from the kids
and a kiss from Negan. Work was her escape. It was stressful. It was overwhelming, but it’s where
she felt the most at home. It was her thing. It was the one thing that she was good at. It just came
easily to her and she enjoyed it. Hours just flew by when she was working and it would be dark
outside before she even realized it. Today she was one of the last people out of the office and when
she finally got back home, she parked in the driveway taking time to herself. Finally grabbing her
personal cell phone, she turned it on after having it off all day which allowed her to focus. The
sound of her alerts filled the air so many times making her tip her head back and rest it against the
seat while they continued to flood her phone. When they finally stopped, she looked down at her
phone to see that they were texts from Negan.

Opening them, she saw that many of them were photos of the kids. It was something he did every
day. It was his way of including her in on their lives when she couldn’t be there. The first few
photos were them on their way to school. And then the rest were at the game. There was all three
of the kids dressed up in the gear for NJ’s team sitting on a bench together. A group photo of all of
them with Negan. NJ warming up followed by a video of what she assumed was the winning hit
for the team from NJ. Reading through the texts she stopped on one.

Little man got the final run in for the team. He’s super excited and can’t wait to tell you about it.
Love you so much.

Negan’s text made her sigh while she continued to scroll through the messages seeing pictures of
the family at the ice cream parlor. In the photos it made her realize how long it had been since she
had actually seen Sam who was there along with Jane and Elaina with Noah. They were all a big
family together and Negan did his hardest to keep Y/N part of it.

Closing her phone, she shoved it back into her purse and sat in the car. A long exhale fell from her
throat when she leaned forward to rest her head against the steering wheel trying to gather enough
energy for her to go in. After a long day at work she wondered if she would be able to take all the
excitement she knew would come from the kids after the day they had. It was already late into the
evening so she was hoping the children would be tired. Even though she hated to admit it, more
often than not she thought about how this wasn’t the life that she wanted. Three kids was a lot with
the job that she had. She’d be lying if she said that she wasn’t going out of her mind a little bit. It
made her worry that maybe she was a bad person because she enjoyed the time away from the
family that she had. The silence felt incredible and it was something that she didn’t often get these
days.

Getting out of the car, she walked up to the house and quietly made it in through the front door.
Once she made it inside, she could see that in the living room the family was stretched out on the
couch together obviously watching a movie. When she made it further in, she saw the way that
they were all cuddled up and asleep. NJ and Isabella were at Negan’s sides with his arms wrapped
around them with Avery absolutely crashed against Negan’s chest. NJ was still in his baseball
clothes and she knew that he wanted to talk to her about the game, but she didn’t want to wake him
up.

It made her relaxed to know that they were all asleep which would give her some time to unwind.
Setting her things down in the office, she made her way through the house and saw that in the
kitchen Negan left her a note to say her dinner was in the refrigerator for her. She wasn’t hungry
though as the firm had ordered something in for them when they had stayed late into the day.

Looking on the counter she saw that all of the children had drawn something for her and she was
sure that it was of Negan’s accord. Looking at the drawings she started with Avery’s and it was
what she assumed to be a sunflower with a happy face. Isabella’s drawing was one of the family
done in crayon and then NJ’s drawing was one of him with her dressed in what she assumed to be
her work clothes with the dogs in the picture. Raising her eyes to the center of the island drew
attention to the bouquet of flowers that Negan had undoubtedly bought her making her swallow
down hard. Collecting the drawings, she set them on the corner of the counter and then went to the
refrigerator. She grabbed herself a drink and relaxed in the kitchen, drawing the attention of Oliver
who always seemed to know when she was around.
“There’s my handsome man,” she whispered lowering down to one knee to give affection to their
oldest dog that she honestly probably had the closest bond with in the family. “You should be
sleeping with the rest of them.”

A small grumble fell from Oliver when he gave her a slight lick at the side of her face making her
chuckle knowing that she wasn’t exactly a fan of that, but she would let him get away with it, “You
ready for bed?”

With a loud exhale, she motioned Oliver to follow her to the stairs and she took her time walking
up them to allow him the extra time he needed for being an older dog. Getting dressed for bed, she
laid down at the center of the bed after getting her sleep clothes on and grabbed her notes from
work to continue to work for a while. It wasn’t until much later when the door opened and she
watched a tired Negan walk into the bedroom making Oliver lift his head up from the side of
Negan’s bed where he had been laying the whole time with Y/N.

“Hey,” Negan yawned brushing his fingers through his messy salt and pepper colored hair closing
the door behind him. “How long have you been home? I thought you’d want to wake up NJ so he
could tell you about his day.”

“I saw the four of you sleeping together and thought I’d let all of you sleep,” she answered marking
a few things on the paperwork that she had in her hands. Setting the pen down on the nightstand,
she lifted her eyes to see that Negan was pulling his shirt off. He tossed it on the chair in the corner
and started to undo his pants. “Did the kids wake up?”

“No, I did. I just carried them up here very carefully and put them in bed. Cooper is with Isabella,”
Negan pulled off his pants and stood before her in his gray boxer briefs, adjusting the waistband at
his slender hips. Moving to the bottom of the bed, Negan reached out to caress over Oliver’s ears
before pressing a loving kiss over Oliver’s head. “I love you my beautiful little dude.”

With a groan Oliver got up from Negan’s side of the bed and moved down the ramp Negan made
for him to head over toward the dog pillow that Negan had originally put in the corner of the
bedroom. Going over to the pillow Negan pampered their oldest dog with attention before looking
back over his shoulder at Y/N.

“You would have been so proud of NJ today. He did great. The bases were loaded with two
outs…” Negan started to explain the game to her while she continued to try to read over her
paperwork and while she didn’t mean to, she was kind of blocking him out so she could just finish
these last few pages of work. It was the bed dipping that finally pulled her attention when she felt
Negan pressing faint kisses at the inside of her leg. “You look so fucking hot right now. My
smarty-pants wife working so hard…”

“Negan,” she huffed out feeling his kisses raising higher and higher up her leg until he got to her
thigh. Lowering her papers she could see the wickedly charming smirk that he gave her when his
hazel eyes lifted to hers and she saw his dimples very prominent underneath his short beard. “I’m
trying to finish this.”

“And I’m okay with that,” Negan slurred, nipping at her flesh when he pulled her thighs further
apart and settled down on his chest between her thighs. “I don’t mind pampering my beautiful wife
while she finishes working on her case. In fact I think it would be an honor. After the long day of
work she had, I don’t mind helping her fucking enjoy herself.”

With a broken breath, she felt Negan reaching underneath the long t-shirt that she had on to grab a
firm hold of her panties to unhurriedly pull them from her body. Tossing them aside, Negan
lowered himself back down to press hot, wet kisses over the insides of her thighs. It made her close
her eyes when Negan curled his arms around her thighs to pull her hips up closer to him making her
whimper when she felt the warmth of his mouth kissing at the most intimate parts of her body. It
made her lower the papers she was holding further making her eyes slam shut.

“Fuck,” she cussed out knowing that he knew she wouldn’t be able to focus with him going down
on her. The wet sounds of him varying between using his tongue and mouth were heard and she
dropped her head back into the pillows. Negan’s tongue did long, slow strokes up the length of her
sex before his lips surrounded her clitoris taking his time to suckle tenderly at her sensitive flesh.
Dropping her right hand down, she sank her fingers into his thick hair enjoying the sensation of his
movements getting harder. “Negan…”

Behind silent pants, she did her best to keep quiet knowing that the kids were upstairs in their
bedrooms sleeping but she was still probably louder than she should have been. There was an
arrogant, amused rumble that fell from Negan’s throat when the wet sounds he was making
increased with the movement of his head from side to side.

Dropping her hands beside her on the bed, she curled her fingers around the sheets into fists, biting
firmly down on her bottom lip when she arched her hips up toward Negan enjoying the sensations
he was flooding her body with while he pampered her with his talented mouth. With a cry, she felt
Negan’s grasp growing tighter around her thighs when her body started to shake against him
making him hum in approval when he got her to an orgasm. Negan knew her body and he knew
exactly what he needed to do in order to get her off. After twelve years, she was glad that was the
case, but as he pulled back and licked at his glistening lips, she could feel her heart hammering
inside of her chest.

“I love you so fucking much,” Negan slurred reaching up to push at the long t-shirt that she was
wearing. Kissing up over her abdomen, Negan’s lips followed the movement of him lifting the
material over her body before stopping at her breast. Taking her breast into his mouth, he teased his
tongue around the taut nipple bringing it to a solid peak before sucking faintly at the flesh. With a
wet popping sound, he released her breast and trailed his kisses across her chest to the other breast
to do the same thing he had just done making her whimper out. “It’s been a while since we’ve
gotten time to do this. There is always a little one in the bed with us…”

“I do have to finish those papers Negan,” she informed him with a shallow breath when Negan
pulled back enough to get up on his knees over her to pull the t-shirt from her body to toss it aside.
Her eyes centered in over his boxer briefs seeing his hard cock bouncing behind the material and it
made her throat go dry. Negan reached for the paperwork she set aside to place it on the nightstand
while she caressed her hands up and over his abdomen making a wolfish smile tug at his handsome
features.

“I know and you will,” Negan slurred straightening up his posture when he felt her fingertips
curling underneath the waistband of his boxer briefs. With a firm tug she managed to pull them
down allowing his solid cock to bounce free from behind the confines of the material it was
trapped beneath. With a growl, Negan felt her fingertips curling around his thick girth to caress up
and over his distended flesh. “You drive me crazy. Y’know that, don’t you?”

“You drive me crazy,” she purred, leaning forward to press a wet kiss at the throbbing tip letting
the tip of her tongue drag across the sensitive flesh making Negan groan out. His stomach sank in
with a shallow breath as she started to press more wet kisses over his body. “I’m glad I can still
make you hard.”

“Is that a smart remark about me getting older?” Negan inquired making her roll her eyes when she
pulled her head back to look up at him. “I mean there is the occasional digs about me being gray
and fifty.”

“You know I like your gray,” she reminded him testing his flesh in her grasp making him reach out
to caress his fingers through her hair while she continued to touch him regardless of their
conversation. “The gray is sexy.”

“Just making sure,” Negan slurred, his jaw flexing when she licked her lips and leaned forward to
take the tip of his cock between her wet lips. It made him groan out, his fingers grabbing a firmer
hold of her hair with her taking her time to tease him with a blowjob. Lapping her tongue at his
flesh made him buck his hips forward toward her making her feel a sense of power. She knew that
when she did this for Negan that she had him in the palm of her hand and he absolutely melted
every time. With circular caressing motions at the base of his cock, she worked to unhurriedly bob
her head over his length making sure to drag her tongue along the underside of his erection with
every pull back her head made toward the tip. “Fuck…fucking…”

Negan wasn’t wrong. It had been a very long time since they had been able to have sex with one
another. Once Avery was born, it was hard for the two of them to really get alone time together. By
the time she was finally home, Negan was exhausted after having to be dad all day long.
Sometimes they would try to fool around in the shower in the morning, but one of the kids would
always cause some kind of commotion that would split them up. So anything they really had with
one another was quick if anything at all. Not that she could really complain about something like
that considering she really didn’t always have time for sex. Even now her mind was still focused on
the paperwork that she had to finish before tomorrow knowing that this wasn’t really the time but
she was trying to return the gesture for what Negan had done for her.

Taking Negan as far back into her throat as she could, she heard Negan let out a deep rumble of a
moan falling forward and bracing himself against the headboard of the bed while she continued her
blowjob making him pant.

“Wait,” Negan muttered, using his fingers to pull back on her hair slightly to get her to stop
pleasuring him. Licking his lips, Negan dragged his thumb out over her plump, bottom lip
collecting the wetness that was left over her flesh. Adjusting his positioning, Negan kicked out of
the material of his boxer briefs and lowered himself over her allowing himself to get comfortable
between her thighs. With an arrogant bob of his head, Negan caressed his thumb in over her jawline
and saw the way her lips parted when he hovered his mouth over hers.

“I thought I would just give you a blow job,” she whispered making Negan smirk, his right
eyebrow arching in amusement when he reached between them to grab a firm hold of his erection
to tease the aching tip through her wet folds. It made her whine and arch her hips up when the head
of his cock teased over her already sensitive clitoris. “You know I have work to finish.”

“I know,” Negan hushed her, his lips finally claiming hers in a passionate kiss that took her breath
away like it had always done before for the last twelve plus years. Leading his cock to her
entrance, Negan rolled his hips allowing his body to sink into hers with ease making her cry out
and dig her fingers into his shoulders. “Fuck. You feel so fucking good.”

“Negan,” she purred in his ear, stroking her fingers through his messy hair feeling like her body
was on fire when Negan’s thrusts started off slow and meticulous. Kiss after addictive kiss
followed from Negan with his tongue brushing out against hers. The deep plunges of his cock left
her gasping with each forward thrust he made and she sucked faintly at his tongue making him
moan.

“I love you so much,” Negan hummed when he kissed over the side of her face toward her jawline.
Reaching up, Negan grabbed a hold of her arms and pinned them against the bed, wrapping his
fingers firmly around her wrists when he started to buck harder up against her. The friction from
his groin rubbing up against hers had a fire burning in the pit of her belly and Negan pulled back
enough to stare into her eyes enjoying the reactions he was able to build up inside of her with his
movements. “Does that feel good?”

“Yes,” she panted feeling his grip getting tighter on her wrists and she whimpered out doing her
best to rock her hips against his movements. There was a hot liquid warmth that flooded through
her veins with the way that Negan was looking at her. There was no denying that her husband was
sexy as hell. He was also an incredible fuck. She knew that from the first moment she slept with
him. He was addictive in all the best ways and she knew she was lucky to have him in her life. Her
body loved every part of him and she knew that. It was just that sometimes things were
complicated. “Harder.”

“Patience,” he hushed keeping up with the same tempo that he had set and she knew that he was
building her orgasm. It was something that Negan liked to do. Edge her right up to that moment of
bliss just to drag it out so when she finally did come it was a body shaking, mind altering orgasm
that rocked her absolutely to the core. It was a talent of his and he knew he was capable of it.
“Let’s enjoy the time that we have together.”

“Fuck Negan,” she lifted her head up to look down between them seeing the deep plunges that his
body was making inside of her. The tip of his cock was hitting her g-spot in such a way that he
knew exactly what he was doing. Whimpers were escaping her as Negan’s thrusts started getting
harder. “Please Negan…”

“You almost there?” he questioned, the warmth of his breath over hers drawing chills up and down
her spine. With a nod, she could feel his thrusts getting more determined and his fingers slid from
her wrists to hook with her fingers. Squeezing his fingers tightly around hers, Negan’s lips claimed
hers again as he found her tensing up against him. Small shakes came from her when her cries
became louder against his mouth that he was muting through his wet kisses. “You’re getting harder
to keep quiet.”

“It’s been a while,” she reminded him rocking her hips up toward his movements so very eager to
get that release he had been building up inside of her. “Negan, please. Please don’t stop.”

“Yes ma’am,” Negan growled against her lips making her purr out when his thrusts grew in
strength and her body was tingling. Doing her best to hold back the inexplicable cry that wanted to
fall from her lips she desperately met Negan in a kiss and felt a rushing flood to her head. Her hips
shook and she heard Negan’s deep rumble of a moan when her body started to contract around his
once he got her to an orgasm. The kiss continued through his motions with him knowing that she
wouldn’t be able to control her volume. After a moment, he paused his movements inside of her
enjoying the way it felt as she laid beneath him breathless. “You feel so good.”

A coo escaped her parted lips when Negan released one of her hands to reach down between them
to circle her sensitive bundle of nerves with the rough pad of his thumb. It made her mewl out, her
hips arching up toward his caress which drew some of his cock out of her but the tip hit a sensitive
spot inside of her that made her writhe beneath him.

“Are you trying to kill me?” she gasped when Negan started to thrust into her again, taking his time
with his movements. Her heart was still pounding in her chest, her muscles tense from her orgasm
and she still had that paperwork at the back of her mind. “I still need to do that paperwork Negan.”

“Forget the paperwork for now,” Negan breathed out against her lips reaching down to grab a hold
of her thighs to get her legs over his shoulders. Adjusting his positioning he wrapped his arms
around her thighs after getting up onto his knees.
The smacking sounds his lower abdomen made up against her lower thighs while he thrust inside of
her filled the air and Negan’s head tipped back. A muted, raspy moan fell from him with his
Adam’s apple bouncing in his throat. Even though everything felt amazing, Y/N knew the longer
they did this, the more exhausted she was going to be and she wanted to get the work done before
falling asleep.

“Fuck me Negan,” she panted watching him nod his head when his thrusts started getting harder
and she bit down on her bottom lip. “Come in me…”

“Give it time honey,” Negan instructed caressing over her flesh hearing her let out a frustrated
sound.

“Negan, I’ve already came twice. I’m okay if you just come,” she informed him with a firm nod of
her head making Negan’s movements stop completely with his hazel eyes staring out at her. “Just
go ahead…”

“I’m nowhere near coming,” Negan looked down between the two of them feeling her pulling her
hips up and away from him before rolling over onto her stomach. Negan watched as she got
situated on her knees in front of him and he could feel her bottom rubbing up against his groin.
“Y/N?”

“You like this position, right? Go ahead, just pound me,” she offered making Negan snort when he
braced himself over her placing his left hand on the bed beside her while the right reach between
the two of them. Stroking his fingers over the length of her sex, Negan tried to focus on her but she
pulled her hips up and away. “It’s okay, just go for it.”

“Yes ma’am,” Negan responded with a silent breath leading the tip of his cock back inside of her.
Almost immediately she brought her hips back against him in powerful, strong motions making
him grunt against the side of her neck while she mainly had control over the movements between
the two of them. “Why are you rushing things?”

“I don’t need four plus orgasms tonight, Negan,” she declared closing her eyes and biting down on
her bottom lip while she focused on bringing her hips back against Negan allowing his sizeable
length to fill her time and time again. “I just want to make you come.”

“Y/N, please…” Negan kissed at the side of her neck attempting to slow down her movements by
grabbing a hold of her hips with his right hand. Trying to set a steadier pace that was more focused,
he kissed over her jawline and felt her tense against him. “What is going on?”

“I just want you to come so I can get back to my work,” she insisted looking back over her shoulder
at him watching the color drain from his face when she said it so bluntly. “You make me come
four times and I’m going to be exhausted by the time we are done. I won’t have any energy in me
to finish what I need to.”

“Are you serious right now?” Negan was at a loss for words feeling her starting to rock back into
him again, but this time he wasn’t moving in response. With what she had said, he found himself
shocked it had turned to that and she let out an irritated exhale. Y/N adjusted her positioning again
and he felt her shoving him back onto the bed before crawling in over him. “You know what? Just
forget it.”

“You’re going to come,” she demanded of Negan making his hazel eyes grow wide with his head
tipping to the side. “So fucking come Negan.”

“I don’t feel like it,” Negan went to get up and she pushed her hand into the center of his chest
making him hiss out when she braced her hand over his chest to keep him down. Wincing out,
Negan felt her grabbing a hold of his cock and she took him back into her body. Her movements
over him were hard and fast. There was no connection and she was using him in pretty much
whatever fashion she wanted. This was completely against everything Negan was when he had sex.
“Just…stop…”

“Stop being a baby Negan,” she snapped at him smacking over the center of his chest making him
scoff at what she did. Bracing her hands she tried to focus on what she knew would feel good for
Negan but noticed the way he just laid there allowing her to do whatever she wanted. “Go ahead.
You can touch me.”

“Are you sure? I wouldn’t want to make you come again and get you too fucking tired,” Negan
piped in making her annoyed with his attitude considering the subject at hand. “You know, some
women would actually like having a husband that can make them come multiple times a night. A
man that lasts a long time…”

“Not when they have something they need to do,” she muttered correcting him enough to let him
know that she really didn’t care that he was upset about the situation. Her movements kept up and
she could hear Negan grunting with every thrust down she made over him. “Come on Negan, touch
me. Do whatever it takes to come.”

“If you’re so damn busy I can just go into the bathroom and jerk off,” Negan went to adjust her to
get her off of him and she reached for his wrists to pin them down against the bed. Lowering over
him, she stared into his hazel eyes and could see that he was angry and upset with her response to
them having sex. “Just get off of me. You don’t want to do this and that’s fine.”

“Stop,” she demanded of him hearing him swallow down hard when her eyes locked with his. “I
wasn’t saying it was bad. You know how good you are at sex and it feels great. I just don’t want to
spend all night having sex.”

Instead of responding, Negan dropped his head back and stared out at her with furrowed eyebrows
while she used the strength she still had to roll her hips over his length in powerful movements
making Negan’s face twist while she did her best to bring him to an orgasm.

“You are still my ridiculously good looking, stubborn as hell husband,” she whispered knowing
that by the expression over his face that he was still upset with her but not fighting her with
whatever it was that she wanted. “You are fighting this so hard.”

“I’m upset,” Negan breathed out feeling her lips hovering over his wincing when he felt her fingers
squeezing tighter around his wrists digging into his flesh. Grunts fell from his throat with the loud
smacking sounds that filled the air with her bringing her hips back against him repeatedly taking
him and out of her body in fluid movements. “I’m pretty much just your personal fucking dildo
right now. You know that right?”

“I’m doing this for you,” she slurred kissing over his lips making him breathe out heavily against
her flesh.

“This isn’t what I want,” Negan whispered and when those words left his lips, it almost fueled her
to move harder over him making his sharp breaths fill the air around them. The bed was squeaking
with the strength of her movements over him and Negan’s chest started flexing with how she was
making him feel.

“While I appreciate you wanting to make every moment romantic and fucking sensual, I sometimes
just want you to come in me and fuck me Negan. Not everything has to be a spectacle. You don’t
have to keep wooing me. I’ve been married to you for twelve years,” she bit at his bottom lip
making him groan out and after, he tipped his head back against the bed. The vein at the side of his
neck was protruding and she could tell by the way his body was tensed up beneath her that he was
about to come. “Almost there…”

“Please,” Negan breathed looking between the two of them feeling his body tensing up when he
tried to move, but she had him locked in. “Don’t end it like this.”

“Let it happen Negan,” she shook her head feeling his cock throbbing inside of her and
involuntarily his hips arched up toward her and his faint moans started to fall from his throat.
“Good boy. Just come inside of me.”

With a growl, Negan managed to use his strength to roll her over onto her back. His forehead
pressed against hers, his fingers hooking tightly with hers when he thrust a few times over her
making sure that they were close instead of being left to feel like an inanimate sex object. His lips
claimed hers, his moans being silenced against her lips while his ropes of cum filled her after she
got him to his release even against what he had asked of her.

When he was done, Negan nuzzled his nose in against the side of her neck after depositing loving
kisses over her flesh and she laid there feeling him going soft inside of her. Stroking her fingers
over the back of his neck and through his damp hair, she took her time listening to his loud
breathing. Her body was still on fire and her heart hammering inside of her chest. Her body
enjoyed what they were doing, the only problem was having her mind elsewhere. And she was
doing her best to be there with Negan while he laid over her and she traced her fingers over the long
planes of his back.

Paying attention to the time, she gave it a few minutes before pushing into Negan to get him to roll
over onto the bed beside her. Sitting up and reaching for the tissues she cleaned herself up before
putting her sleep clothes back on. Grabbing her papers, she heard Negan huff and she could see that
his lengthy body was stretched out and his breathing was loud.

“Is this how every time is going to be?” Negan was looking up at the ceiling, his abdomen sinking
in and rising with every deep breath he took emphasizing the v-line over his slender hips that
brought attention to his softening cock that was resting at his lower abdomen.

“I have an important case right now Negan,” she reminded him making Negan sigh loudly and he
lazily pulled himself up into a seated position on the edge of the bed.

“Yeah, okay,” Negan simply just nodded before reaching for his boxer briefs to pull them back
over his slender hips. Standing at the bottom of the bed for a moment, he rest his hands on his hips
before nodding toward the door. “I’m going to go lay on the couch for a while.”

“Negan,” she huffed seeing him head for the door to leave and when he did, she saw that Oliver
had woken up. He was looking between her and the door as if trying to decide who to stay with.
“You’re going to go after him, aren’t you?”

After staring out at her with his big brown eyes, Oliver grumbled as he pulled himself up from the
bed and headed out of the bedroom to follow Negan downstairs and she dropped her papers down
on her chest, “Figures.”

Taking time to think about the whole situation, she debated whether she should go after Negan but
ultimately decided against it. The thing she wanted to do needed to get done and she wanted it done
tonight so she could work on other things tomorrow. So Negan would just have to wait.
 Chapter 19
Chapter Summary

After their fight the night before, Y/N wakes up feeling incredibly negative about the
whole situation toward both her family and Negan which leads to harsh decisions.

Chapter Notes

There are three or four chapters left of this story. I do apologize, this is an incredibly
angsty chapter with someone who is going through somewhat of a mid-life crisis. I
also know nothing about being a lawyer so I apologize for that. This is very different
for me, but I wanted to be different.

Like clockwork, there was that bounce on the bed that woke her up every…single…morning. It
alerted her that one of the dogs jumped up on the bed with her. Groaning out, she rolled onto her
back and caressed her hands over her tired eyes. Last night after she finished her work, she just laid
down and went to sleep. Since Negan took off to lay on the couch downstairs, she let him do his
own thing. She figured whenever Negan was done being upset, he would make his way back up to
bed and get over whatever it was he was going through.

Drowsily her eyes partially opened and she felt Oliver laying in beside her on the bed. When her
eyes adjusted to the light, she noticed that Negan was at the dresser pulling out some sweatpants to
hold at his side. While Negan dug through the drawers, she realized that he must have only just
made it back upstairs. Which meant he slept on the couch downstairs all night instead of just
coming back up to bed. Once he pulled a white tank top out, she sighed and closed her eyes tightly.
When they were younger, Negan dressed a little nicer than he did now. Soccer dad probably
defined the way he dressed when he was home. Comfort meant more to Negan than looking good.

Adjusting in the bed made Negan look back over his shoulder at her with his big hazel eyes and he
nodded toward the bathroom, “I’m going to get a quick shower in before the kids wake up. I just let
out the dogs so they should be good.”

“Is this the first time you came back upstairs?” she questioned when Negan turned to gaze her over
holding the sweatpants and the tank top at his side. By the way he was looking at her she knew
that it was most certainly the first time he returned to the bedroom after their disagreement.
Considering what he just said to her, she lifted her head to see that he was still only in his gray
boxer briefs that left little to imagination when it came to his body. “Did you go outside in your
boxer briefs to let the dogs out?”

“I stood at the back door,” Negan conceded to what she noticed, throwing his arms up when she
seemed to be upset with him for that. “We have a privacy fence Y/N. Although I think seeing me
like this would make certain people’s day, no one saw me outside in my boxer briefs. I promise you
that and yes, this is the first time I’ve been back up here since last night.”

“Jesus,” Y/N turned onto her side noticing that on Negan’s pillow again was a flower and note just
like all the mornings before. Rolling her eyes, she pulled herself up into a seated position and
dragged herself back to brace her back against the headboard. “I see you didn’t forget about your
morning ritual.”

“I never have,” Negan stated standing at the bottom of the bed. His abdomen sank in with his
heavy breathing, his Adam’s apple bouncing in his throat when he saw her reaching for the flower.
With a shake of her head she snatched the note from the pillow and stood from the bed letting out a
pained sound. “Aren’t you going to read the letter?”

“Do I really have to?” she snarked back turning on her heel to give him a glare and a shrug of her
shoulders. Looking to the note in her hand, she knew that after twelve years it started getting
repetitive. It was always said in a different way but had the same meaning. “It’s the same thing
every single day. Maybe worded different, but you always say the same thing. Every fucking day
for the last twelve years. It’s a red rose and a letter telling me how much you love me. Packed with
a punch of Negan positivity to make me feel loved.”

“And that’s a bad thing?” Negan whispered, his jaw clenching tightly while he tried to read her
expression when she gave him a smirk.

A long exhale fell from Negan’s throat as she headed over toward the vase that was in their
bedroom to drop the rose down in it. Oliver was sitting at the bottom of the bed looking between
the two of them when Negan’s fingers curled tightly around the clothes that he was holding onto.

“I think you’ll like the letter,” Negan suggested lifting his hand up to use one of his fingers to point
at it in her hand. “This one is longer. It’s more personal. I took some time to think this one out.”

“I don’t want to read it,” she revealed making Negan let out a sharp exhale, his chest rising and
falling repeatedly showing that she was upsetting him. “You’re standing in front of me Negan.
Anything you want to say to me you can say to me. I shouldn’t have to read it in a fucking letter
every single morning.”

“I’m confused,” Negan breathed out while standing at the center of their room seeing her pull open
the top drawer of her dresser to point to all of the notes that he had written her recently. After all of
their years together, she would eventually put them into scrap books and she kept all of them so he
thought they made her happy. Now so many of them were collecting in her top drawer instead of
her putting them away into more scrapbooks. There were so many things that Negan wanted to say,
but he frowned and shrugged his shoulders. “I thought you like what I did every morning.”

“It was exceedingly fucking charming the first few years of being married to you Negan,” she
looked to the roses that were in the vase across the room before drawing her attention back to
Negan. Dropping this on him had upset him and she knew that, but she just didn’t seem to care this
morning after everything. “My husband is writing me a letter and leaving me a flower every
morning. It’s super cute, but after twelve years of being married to you…is there nothing else you
can think of? Do you know how many roses and letters I’ve received from you Negan since being
married to you?”

“I just…” Negan’s face flushed over and he looked down toward the floor, his jaw flexing while
she stared out at him waiting for him to answer.

“You’re a teacher Negan, can you do the math of how many it is? Twelve years…” she repeated
clearly embarrassing Negan and upsetting him when she continued to dig it in further. His face was
twisting with sadness while her heart hammered inside of her chest knowing that she was getting so
worked up from the stress and the annoyances that had been bothering her over the last few
months. “Sorry, I forgot you’re just a gym teacher. You don’t have to use your brain for that…”
“Did I do something wrong?” Negan lifted his head, his big eyes sad and his thick expressive
eyebrows were furrowed. “Did I say something over the last few days that upset you?”

“It’s over four thousand letters and flowers Negan,” she ignored the question pointing between the
vase and the top drawer where she placed the letters every morning. “At this point in our marriage
it’s almost four and a half thousand Negan.”

“I thought it was romantic and showed you every day that I loved you,” Negan searched for the
right words to say, doing his best not to get emotional over the whole thing since this was the
second morning in a row where she really laid into him. “I can get you a different flower if you
want…I just thought the red roses were romantic. I thought they were your favorite.”

“Our kids might like getting a letter from you every day in their lunches, but it would be nice if you
used a little creativity sometimes when it comes to me Negan. Your daily gifts have gotten so
fucking repetitive and boring,” she snapped at him hearing him swallow down hard. Tossing his
newest note into her drawer, she knew that maybe now wasn’t the time, but there were things that
Negan had been doing to irritate her lately and it was just exploding. “I want to know what
happened to the adventurous, wild, fun, wickedly charming man that I married. The one that kept
me on my toes wondering what he was going to do next.”

“I thought I was still him,” Negan reasoned with her hearing her chuckle before lowering her head
down to pinch at the bridge of her nose in frustration. A lump was developing in his throat that he
couldn’t quite swallow down when he felt goosebumps developing over his arms. “I’m a full-time
dad Y/N. I can’t be as wild and spontaneous with four young kids, but I’m still me.”

“Maybe if we wouldn’t have had so many fucking kids, you’d still be you,” she blurt out making
Negan’s lips part and it looked like he was about to say something with his face reddening over. “If
you would have told me in my early twenties that I would be married to a man with five children, I
would have laughed in your face. Yet here I am. Married with three children of my own and two
stepchildren. This was my fucking nightmare when I was a kid.”

“I don’t…” Negan stammered, his head shaking when he tried to come up with a response. “I don’t
know what to say.”

“That’s a surprise because you always have something to say,” she opened up another drawer to
pull out a pack of pills to wave it about. “Speaking of kids, it’s a good thing we brought them up so
I can take one of these. The last thing we need right now is another Avery moment happening. A
sixth fucking child in the Smith family is not needed.”

“Please don’t talk like that,” Negan begged of her, his head tipping to the side after she swallowed
down one of the pills she popped out, stealing a look back at him. “I understand that you are going
through some things Y/N right now and maybe I don’t understand it, but talking about your
children like that…”

“Not all of them are my children,” she countered Negan making his jaw flex upon her reminder, his
breathing growing louder. “And with Avery, you know that she came at a horrible time because the
last thing I needed was another child.”

“I don’t know what you want me to say,” Negan explained, lifting his hand up to grab at the
necklace that was around his neck. To this day he still kept his original wedding rings from his first
marriage to Lucille there and he would grab onto them in moments of tension to find some kind of
strength from them. God, the fact he still wore those infuriated her too. “You’re the one that
doesn’t want to use condoms. You’ve stressed that since the two of us first got together. You were
on birth control and you still got pregnant. Avery was meant to be here. And if you weren’t so
troubled, I think you would be upset with yourself for saying these things because you love
Avery.”

Standing before Negan, she stayed silent. Sure, she loved her children. They were hers after all, but
as she stood before Negan just seeing his body reminded her all over again how Negan was the
parent that they all loved the most. In typical Negan fashion, he had all of his children’s names
tattooed on his body along with stuff dedicated to her. Even though she loved her children, right
now she didn’t feel connected to any of them. Reaching her hand out, she brushed her fingers over
the top of Oliver’s head knowing that their dog was the one thing she felt the closest too.

“Y/N?” Negan muttered her name as if he was expecting her to say something, but she didn’t.
“Listen, I don’t know what’s going on and I’m sorry. If there is something I can do to make you
feel better or help take the stress of things off of you, I will…”

“I don’t know where to start with you Negan,” she threw her hands up in the air feeling like she
was on fire and there was an undeniable rage flooding her veins. “How many times do I have to tell
you that you’re boring and repetitive? I miss the excitement I felt when I was first with you. I miss
when you would dress like a bad ass and not a fucking soccer dad. You used to be charismatic,
charming, dark, broody, sexy, a leather wearing bad boy. It’s funny because all the women at work
and at the schools tell me how fucking lucky I am to be married to you. Yeah, you’re hot and
you’re a good dad, but you’re not what I pictured you would be when I married you.”

“I’ll work on it,” Negan spoke up, his voice raspier than usual. Looking up at him, she felt her
heart skip a beat seeing that his bottom lip was trembling involuntarily with his eyes tearing over.
“I’m sorry.”

“Are you getting emotional over this whole thing?” she slammed the drawer shut making Negan’s
lips part while staring out at her. A shuddering breath fell from his lungs when she folded her arms
out in front of her chest. “This is ridiculous Negan.”

“You complained about the idea of me making love to you last night. Then you used my body like
I was some kind of fucking dildo instead of being your husband. You mock me for my job. You
attack me for trying to do something romantic for you every morning. I’m not what you pictured
me to be, but I’m exactly everything that I promised I would be. I promised to take care of you,
make your dreams come true and support you along with our family. While you’re busy and away
doing your job that you wanted so bad, I’m the one that is taking care of our children. I’m the one
that does everything to let them know that their mama loves them and how amazing she is. I’ve
always been here lifting you up, I’m everything I promised I would be when you married me,”
Negan cleared his throat, his emotions getting the best of him when he felt the warmth of a stray
tear sliding down his face and he felt pathetic for getting upset. “I’m just starting to think that you
don’t like me anymore. Your problem is me. You’re just acting out because you hate me.”

“Here we go,” she rolled her eyes turning around to go looking for her clothes for the day while
Negan stood there. “I’m sorry I didn’t want to waste my time having you do your version of
making love to me last night because I wanted to finish my work. I just didn’t feel like having
endless amounts of sex. I think you should be grown up enough to understand that.”

After she brought up last night, she heard Negan walking swiftly into the bathroom. Heading in
that area, she saw Negan scrambling through the drawer pulling out the box of nicotine patches
that he had. Negan pulled it open and she stood at the door of the bathroom knowing that once they
had Avery Negan decided to stop smoking because of a bad dream he had and he wanted to be
around for the children growing up, “Jesus Negan, just fucking smoke at this point. This is getting
really ridiculous with you always running to get a nicotine patch any time you have the smallest
amount of stress in your life.”

“Is there anything else you want to fucking attack me for this morning?” Negan dropped the box,
his voice tremoring when he looked back at her with an upset expression. “Am I no longer
appealing to you? Is my body too old? Is my hair too gray? Am I too fucking skinny for you?”

“You’re being dramatic,” she pointed out watching him turn to face her while his fingers wrapped
tightly around the counter. “You know, you would genuinely think you were the woman in this
relationship Negan with the way you’re acting.”

“Right because being a man with emotions is a bad thing,” Negan scoffed when she stepped
forward further into the bathroom with him. “I don’t even know who you are anymore. Yesterday
you are telling Isabella and NJ that the only reason I can make it to their events is because I have a
shitty job that I could just quit since I don’t have to work for money. Newsflash sweetheart, neither
one of us would have to work if it came to things. I would have been able to take care of you until
the end of time if that was what you wanted.”

“Oh yeah, to be completely controlled by you…I can’t think of a better way to spend my life,” she
rolled her eyes hearing Negan huff when she threw that out there. Stepping forward, she could hear
that his breathing was loud. His angry hazel eyes were locked on hers and they were still damp
from her giving him a hard time. “You know that the people in your life already thought I was a
gold digger.”

“I don’t give a shit what other people thought,” Negan rumbled, the tension in his body making
him uncomfortable. It was like his body didn’t know whether it wanted to be angry or upset with
the things that were being said. “All I cared about was you…loving you. I wanted to be with you
and I didn’t care what people thought. You were it for me. You are it for me.”

Silence surrounded them when Negan sounded broken with the last thing that he said to her.
Reaching out, she grabbed a hold of the waistband of his boxer briefs pulling on it a bit making him
frown. “What’s it going to take for you to calm down and just relax?”

“Excuse me?” Negan inquired, tipping his head to the side when she moved forward to close the
distance between the two of them. Pushing her fingers underneath the material of his boxer briefs,
she swiped her fingers across the flesh there making him uncomfortably shift before her. “Stop…”

“Shhh…” she hushed him, getting the material down so they pooled at his ankles and he was
standing before her naked. Glancing down, Negan went to bend down to grab them to pull them
back on, but she pressed into the center of his chest backing him into a corner with his back hitting
the wall. Curling her fingers around the root to his masculinity had Negan taking in a sharp breath.
Palming him in her hand over and over again, she felt him trying to brace his hands over her
shoulders to put a distance between them. “Do you need me to give you a blowjob to fix the things
that you are feeling?”

“A blowjob doesn’t erase the things you’ve said,” Negan scowled while trying to carefully reach
for her hand to get her to release him. “I have to get ready so I can get the kids off to school and get
to work. Unlike someone who is a partner at the company, I just can’t make my hours.”

“Calm down,” she shoved into the center of his chest making him grunt when his back hit the
counter again. Lowering down, she started depositing kisses over his body. “I know you Negan…
your body loves the attention that I give it.”

“That’s because I love you,” Negan reached out to cup her face in his hands trying to draw her to
look up at him instead of heading in a sexual route again. “I am head over heels in love with you
Y/N. There is no one else for me, but you. I don’t know what has been happening between us,
but…I’d like to fix whatever it is.”

Staring out at Negan, she didn’t know what to say. It wasn’t something that she felt like he could
fix and having him being sweet to her even after she was being a bitch to him didn’t exactly sit
well with her. Pulling her face away from him, she heard Negan sigh and he dropped his head
back.

“I’m going to take a shower so I can start the day,” Negan announced, moving around her to get to
the shower.

Once the water was on and Negan was inside, she leaned back against the counter trying to calm
herself down. Hearing a huff, she looked back toward the room to see that Oliver was staring out at
her. With the look he was giving her, it made her feel like the dog was disappointed in her for her
response to things making this all the weirder.

“Don’t judge me,” she whispered, pushing the door partially closed before getting out of her
clothes. Pulling open the shower door, she gazed over the length of Negan’s naked body while he
finished rinsing the shampoo out of his hair. Moving in behind him, she closed the door to the
shower and hooked her arms loosely around him. It made Negan tense up beneath her touch when
she started caressing over his wet torso before delicately kissing over the center of his back. “I’m
sorry. I’m so stressed lately and I was taking it out on you.”

Negan didn’t say anything, he just lowered his head and hooked his fingers with hers. Pressing her
forehead up against the center of his back, she knew that she still felt the things that she said to
him, but it was best to apologize to him if she wanted life to remain comfortable for them.

“I was wrong,” she said what she thought he would want to hear working to get him to face her
beneath the spray of the water. Palming her hands up over his damp body, she stepped forward and
tipped up on her toes to kiss him making him melt against her. One thing she never doubted was
that Negan loved her. With how easily he crumbled in her hands, she knew that he couldn’t stay
mad at her. “You know that I love you.”

“And I love you,” Negan responded, his hands reaching up to cup her face in his large hands so he
could stroke over the sides of her face with his thumbs. “If I’m doing something wrong, I just wish
you would tell me what I can do to make things better.”

There was a war going on inside of her. It was the half that honestly hated her life as much as she
didn’t want to admit it and the half that loved Negan. Ultimately, she kept her mouth shut and
hooked her left arm around the back of his neck to pull him down so she could kiss him again.
Reaching for the body wash, she worked to soap up Negan’s body and when her fingers curled
around his length again she heard him let out a shuddering breath.

“Let’s sneak in a quickie in the shower before the kids wake up,” she suggested making Negan
frown while she sheathed his flesh in her caress. Grabbing a hold of her wrist, Negan shook his
head and it made her sigh. “Negan?”

“You don’t want to have sex with me, you’re just trying to make me feel better and I appreciate it,
but sex isn’t the answer to things. You know that,” Negan declared with a shake of his head,
stroking his thumb over her pulse point and making her sigh. “I tell you what? How about tonight
we go out to a nice place for dinner? Talk things out. Work on us. It’s been so long since we’ve
gone out and had a date night between the two of us. We can talk, have a nice meal, do something
romantic and see where that leads us? I can just call Sam and I’m sure she would be happy to watch
the kids for us.”
“Negan,” she frowned knowing that he seemed set on the suggestion he gave the two of them. “I
can’t tonight. I’m working with that police officer on this case.”

“What about tomorrow?” Negan offered up another day making her frown and step back away
from him. “Y/N, you’ve been working on this case non-stop. I know you’ve got this whole thing
handled. Just take one night off for your husband. Please. I promise you it’s just the one night and
you will have a good night.”

“Between you and NJ, I fucking swear,” she reached around Negan to grab the shampoo feeling her
tension returning. “The both of you just think I can take off whenever I want. If I take off to go on
some date with you, NJ is going to expect me to go to his final game with baseball. That will be
two days that I have to take off.”

“I know your job is important to you Y/N, but you need to make time for your family too,” Negan
reasoned with her, his hazel eyes upset with her response to the suggestion. “NJ is almost twelve.
Those six years are going to pass quickly and before you know it, you’re going to miss his whole
childhood. I know you love your job, but your family is here too. If you don’t take a night off for
me, just please try to take the evening off for NJ.”

“I can’t,” she scoffed making a disappointed expression flood Negan’s features. “There is a reason
that I was able to make partner so fast Negan and it wasn’t because I was fucking off with my
family. Between my job and NJ’s baseball, my job is more important.”

“It’s not,” Negan shook his head making the rage inside of her grow. “Negan Junior is your son.
He doesn’t think you love him Y/N. I think your other partners at the company would understand
you taking one day off in order to see your son in the finals.”

“It must be easy for someone who had money their whole life to say shit like you do,” she started
to lather up her hair after pouring some shampoo into the palm of her hand. “The only way NJ
would think I didn’t love him is if you were putting that shit in his head.”

“The only reason he still thinks you love him is because I put that shit in his head,” Negan said
back in a rebuttal making her let out an annoyed breath. “Your son feels abandoned by you Y/N.
I’m telling you, if you don’t make it to his final game you are going to break him. I can only do so
much, but it is you that he wants the attention of. Not me.”

“You’re their favorite,” she disputed with a shake of her head, pushing around Negan to step under
the stream of water. “I’m sorry Negan, but your idea just isn’t going to work when I have such an
important case. Both you and NJ will live.”

“I don’t think you understand Y/N. NJ will live, but he’ll learn to live without you,” Negan sighed
loudly from behind her and threw his hands up when she looked back at him in the shower. “And
that’s the last thing you want from your child.”

Giving her a once over, Negan shook his head and got out of the shower leaving her alone to finish
up. It made her angry that once again someone was asking her to put her job in jeopardy in the
name of her family which was something Negan stressed he would never make her do. Yet she was
made to feel guilty once more about everything. Taking more time in the shower than she should
have, she allowed herself that space before finally getting ready for the day.

Once she got to the stairs, she stopped when she saw Negan at the center of the living room with
all three children. Staying still for a moment, she watched Isabella reaching her arms up for Negan
to pick her up. With a growl, Negan grabbed her and tossed her up in the air making her giggle out
loud. Once Negan caught her, he spun her around before peppering her with kisses. Setting her on
the ground, Negan squeezed Isabella close to him so that he could hug her firmly.

“My turn,” NJ spoke up making Negan snicker as he reached for their son. Doing the same thing
had NJ bursting out in laughter. Burying his head against the center of Negan’s chest, NJ’s laugh
made Negan smile brightly.

“Me,” Avery’s tiny voice echoed when she reached up to tug at Negan’s tank top. With a laugh,
Negan carefully set NJ down before tossing their youngest up in the air hearing her giggles fill the
air. Peppering Avery with kisses, Negan nuzzled his nose in against hers making her grasp onto the
sides of Negan’s face. “Again!”

“Again? Daddy is lucky that his back still works for the first part of the morning,” Negan tossed
Avery up in the air, but swung her down and then spun in a circle, keeping her firmly in his arms
making her howl out with laughter. “My kids are little adrenaline junkies.”

With a big jump, NJ managed to hop up onto Negan’s back wrapping his arms around Negan’s
shoulders so that Negan was giving him a piggyback ride. Reaching with his free arm, Negan
grabbed a hold of Isabella playfully roaring out as he spun the three of them around.

Moving down the steps, Y/N finally drew the attention of the four of them seeing Negan’s dimples
prominent with the amusement and happiness he gained from being with their children. Stopping at
the stairs, she saw that she gained all of their attention.

“Mom, come get dad too!” NJ called out making her smirk and shake her head. Spinning them
around one more time, Negan was careful to put Isabella and Avery down on the couch. Hopping
down himself, NJ ran over to Y/N and reached for her hands. “Mom! Did you hear what happened
yesterday? What I did?”

“Yeah, your dad showed me,” she knew that her son was referencing how he helped his team win
the game. “Good job kiddo. I had no doubts that you would do an amazing job with how hard you
practice.”

“Maybe you can see me at the final game! I can dedicate my time up at bat to you. Maybe I can do
it again for you if you’re there,” NJ smiled brightly, his dimples drawing attention to his young
features while he smiled. With a sigh, she lifted her stare to see that Negan sat on the couch
between the girls. Avery crawled into his lap and Isabella reached for his arm to wrap his arm
around her so she could cuddle in closer to him. “Mom?”

“NJ, I told you that it was very unlikely that I would be able to make it to your final game,” she
reminded her son making the happiness slip from his features. Hearing her say that made NJ step
back, his head drop forward and his arms slumped at his sides. “Your dad will get everything for
me on his phone like he does every other game.”

“Right,” NJ huffed out moving away from his mom to head over toward the couch to sit down.
Crossing his arms, Y/N could see that NJ’s demeanor changed completely after she let him down.

“I’ve got to go to work,” Y/N informed them with a sigh looking to the time making Negan sit
forward bringing their two girls with him when he stood up from the couch. “Come give mommy a
hug goodbye.”

“You want me to grab you a bagel or something?” Negan went to kiss her only for her to turn her
head away from him so he kissed her cheek. With a shake of his head, Negan stepped back and set
their daughters down so they could both give her a hug goodbye. “You don’t want to wait for me
to finish breakfast?”
“No, I’m fine,” she answered looking over at NJ who had his legs pulled up to his chest while he
sat on their couch. NJ was staring out blankly at something avoiding looking at his family after she
turned down the idea of her getting to be there for his game. “Are you going to come say
goodbye?”

“Goodbye,” NJ waved from where he was seated making Negan let out a loud exhale.

“Come hug your mother goodbye NJ,” Negan called out making NJ’s face scrunch up when he
stared out at Negan. “Before someone leaves, we should always tell them that we love them.”

“No,” Y/N held her hand up after hearing NJ groan out when he went to get up to come over to do
what Negan told him to. “Stay there. You don’t want to hug me, that’s your choice. You don’t
have to do anything you don’t want to do.”

“Y/N,” Negan muttered making her shake her head and hold her finger up to silence Negan.

“If you don’t like me, don’t pretend to like me Negan Junior,” she kept her eyes connected with
their son noticing the way his jaw locked up and he lowered back down to the edge of the couch.
“I’m only your mother.”

“I was getting up to hug you,” NJ noted shaking his head. His young features twisted and his lips
parted. “I don’t dislike you. I love you.”

“Your actions lately say otherwise,” she informed her son feeling Negan reaching out to grab a hold
of her shoulder knowing that she was angry with their oldest for having hurt feelings about things.
“You make it clear that you think I’m a bad mother and that you don’t like me. So if you don’t
want to be nice to me, don’t be. I don’t want my child to be fake with me.”

“Mommy, I don’t think he dislikes you. I think you just hurt his feelings about the baseball game,”
Isabella tried to reason with her mother, reaching up to curl her fingers around Y/N’s. “He just
really wants you to be there for his games.”

“I just don’t get why it’s so hard. You miss our birthdays, you miss our school events, why can’t
you just make it to one game?” NJ’s voice was broken making Y/N’s body tense up again that he
continued to bring this whole thing up even after she had explained it to him multiple times. “I
don’t get why it has to be like this.”

“Do you want me to lose my job?” she inquired making NJ exhale loudly and look down toward
the ground.

“Yes,” NJ whispered, his expressive eyebrows lifting after he considered his answer. “Yes, I want
you to lose your job. I hate your job. I never see you. We never do things together as a family. So
yes, I want you to lose your job.”

“Yet it’s okay if your dad continues to do what your dad does?” Y/N pointed in the direction of
Negan seeing the way that Negan’s Adam’s apple bounced in his throat.

“Dad doesn’t miss anything. Dad makes sure to know that we feel loved,” NJ reasoned with his
mother placing his hand in over the center of his chest. “I’m sorry mom, but Elaina is a doctor.
And she makes it to some of Noah’s games. A doctor is much busier than a lawyer from what I’ve
learned at school. I don’t understand how she can make his games, but you can’t.”

“Right, I forgot. I’m constantly being compared to Elaina and Jane because their jobs are way
more important than mine,” she bickered back with her son seeing the anger growing in his
features. The expression that he was giving her was one that she had seen frequently on Negan. “So
you want me to lose my job?”

“I want you to be a mom,” NJ responded, his voice rasp as he stared up at her with his expressive
hazel eyes. “I just want to spend time with you. I want you to be around. I want you to be here for
something special sometimes.”

“So you want me to give up my job when it makes me happy?” she repeated making NJ’s lips part
and he thought about what she asked of him before tipping his head from side to side.

“I thought we made you happy,” NJ commented on her response to him standing up from the
couch to move before her. “I want you happy mom, but I just want us to be a family. When you get
home from work, you aren’t always the nicest.”

“If you want to go there,” she stammered with an agitated breath staring her son down. “I don’t like
your attitude very much lately and I’m not really liking you either.”

“Enough,” Negan snapped watching the color drain completely from their son’s features. “What is
wrong with you?”

“He’s allowed to give it, but I’m the bad one when I tell him I don’t like who he has become with
the attitude?” she turned to face Negan making his jaw tense showing that he was upset with her
talking to their son like that. “I don’t know who he is learning to be disrespectful from, but it’s not
becoming of him.”

“Disrespectful? I’m a good kid,” NJ defended himself, his eyes tearing over when he stepped in
closer to her. Moving between the two of them, Negan wrapped his arms around NJ in a supportive
grasp. Attempting to move his father aside, NJ was obviously getting upset and he couldn’t help it.
Hell, Negan got it. He really did. “I don’t do anything bad. I’m good in school. I’m a good big
brother. I don’t swear…often. I don’t do bad things. I just want you in my life and you don’t like
me?”

“Isabella, go take your brother to your room,” Negan begged of his oldest daughter knowing that
NJ was going to get even more hurt if he didn’t get out with the mood that Y/N was in lately.
Isabella reached for her older brother’s hand when Negan stood before their children. Reaching
down, Negan picked up Avery and pulled her in closer to his chest. Once Negan saw that the oldest
two were gone, Negan stared out at Y/N with a shake of his head. “I don’t know what’s going on
with things lately, but I think we need to have a family meeting and talk this shit out. He’s just
eleven Y/N.”

“And he’s giving me a shit load of attitude,” Y/N responded seeing Avery having big eyes while
she looked back and forth between them. With her being only two years old it was easier for them
to freely talk back and forth between one another, but it was clear that Avery noticed the tension
between the two of them. “Not wanting to hug me.”

“He’s a kid, he’s going to have hurt feelings Y/N,” Negan pointed out with a frown, adjusting
Avery in his arms as she cuddled her head in against the center of his chest. Even with Avery, Y/N
knew that their youngest daughter was much closer to Negan, but it was because her career really
took off once Avery was born. So that meant their youngest didn’t have a lot of time to spend with
her. Negan did his best to keep her part of their lives, but work was busy. “Whatever is going on,
we’re going to have to fix it because we’re family. You two love each other. He’s your first and
you’re his mom.”

“Yeah,” she didn’t say anything else because she didn’t know what to say. Looking to her watch
again, she sighed and nodded toward the door. “I have to go. Tell them I love them and that I hope
they have a good day at school.”

“Of course I will,” Negan assured her, his eyebrows furrowing when he stepped in closer to her.
Knowing that she avoided a kiss previously, he pressed a kiss over her cheek and let it linger. “I
love you Y/N. We all love you.”

With a weak smile and a nod, she gave Avery a quick kiss on the cheek and then stepped back.
Exhaling loudly, she stopped at the door after she went to leave thinking about NJ. Part of her
knew that she should have gone to talk to him, but at the same time he had to get ready for school
and she had to get to work. It would just have to be a conversation for later.

Once she was at work, she was able to shut all of those emotions and feelings down. Working on
her case helped her get through the day without feeling overwhelmed or upset. Since this was such
a big case, she had been working with an officer that had been part of the case making sure to get
all the details correct. His name was Shane Walsh and he was going to be one of her witnesses and
she just wanted to make sure that she had this case under control. Over the last few hours they had
been stuck in her office long after many people went home talking about things.

“Have you eaten dinner?” Shane spoke up making her lift her head from where she was sitting in
the chair across from him. She had been writing down something in her notes while he sat before
her in silence. “We’ve been here for hours and I haven’t seen you eat a thing.”

“I’ll pick up something on the way home,” she waved her hand dismissively looking back to what
she was writing hearing Shane snicker and shift in his seat before her. “I’m used to it.”

“Someone as beautiful as you should really be taken to a nice place where you get a nice dinner,”
Shane replied back making her smirk and shake her head, but it didn’t draw her to lift her head up.
“You laugh, but I mean it. I think I’ve spent more hours with you lately than I have my own
family. You should let me take you out for dinner. We can continue to talk about things there.”

“Are you flirting with me?” she inquired, dropping the pen that she was using into her lap while
she held onto her files. An arrogant expression flooded in over Shane’s features when he leaned
back in the chair and his legs spread open. “We’re supposed to have a work relationship here
Officer Walsh.”

“I’ve never spent this much time with someone while I was working on a case,” Shane declared
with a snicker, reaching up to brush his fingers through his dark hair and he shrugged. “I figure you
must like being around me because we’ve done this a lot. And I reckon it’s because you like me.”

“Smooth,” she muttered finding herself charmed with the man before her. Sure, Shane was a good-
looking guy, but this really was all about work for her. “You know this is a big case and not just
something small. If it was small, you would be with a court appointed lawyer. Not me. I like to
win.”

“I couldn’t tell,” Shane lifted his finger to spin it around referring to the awards and newspaper
clippings that were framed on the wall. “You have a huge office in the tallest building in the city. I
figured you were kind of big shit. I like when a woman takes things seriously.”

“A woman takes things seriously?” she repeated his words making her eyebrow arch in curiosity.
Shane bobbed his head about before tossing his hands up making her smile. “That sounds a little
sexist Shane.”

“I’m just saying that I like to see a woman take charge,” Shane corrected his previous statement
making her chuckle under her breath. Shaking her head, she looked back to her files only to hear
Shane sliding to the edge of the seat so that he was close to her. “So how about that dinner?”

“I can’t,” she denied his suggestion grabbing the pen that she placed down and put it back on her
desk. “I have a lot of work I have to finish up here. Then I’m just going to pick something up on
the way home. If you want to head out, you can though. I understand if you are hungry and you put
in a few good hours with me. I think we’ve gone over everything extensively.”

“Are you not interested in me?” Shane was blunt with the way that he asked her making her
eyebrows bounce up in surprise. “I feel like I’ve made it clear that I’m very interested in you. I
keep flirting and I feel like you keep shutting me down.”

“I just thought you were a flirty person in general Shane,” she answered with a simple shrug,
sucking at her bottom lip finding more so amusement in the fact that Shane was laying it on so
thick. “You’re good looking, but I’m not interested in a relationship with you other than a work
relationship.”

“Well why not? I’m hot. I’m strong. I’m a police officer, so I have a bit of power,” Shane rambled
off, flexing his arm in a not-so-subtle attempt to get her to notice his bulging bicep. “Some people
have a fantasy of having sex with a police officer you know. Something to do with the handcuffs
maybe.”

“For the most part I can’t stand the police,” she was honest, folding her arms in front of her chest
making Shane scoff. “I find them to be arrogant assholes that have a power trip because of their
job.”

“Well, I am that, but I’m a good time too,” Shane winked making her roll her eyes and shake her
head finding amusement in the discussion. “Come on, you work so hard. Let me take you out to
dinner and see where things go.”

“Shane, I’m married,” she lifted her left hand to see the way that Shane didn’t seem to care when
he saw the rings on her finger. “I’ve been married for twelve years. I’m not on the market for
dating. Hell, I have three kids and two stepchildren. So trust me, this is not a territory that you want
to step into. I promise you that.”

“I don’t care that you’re married, nice ring though. I’ve never seen anything like it,” Shane
commented on the ring knowing that it was quite extensive which made him assume that her
husband was rich based off the ring alone.

“My husband designed it himself with my step-daughter,” she remembered looking down at the
ring that Negan had given her when they were younger. Stroking her thumb over the top of it, she
remembered what it was like that day. It made her smirk when she thought back on it. “He made a
big ordeal of the whole thing. He had a puppy that day that we still have. Decorated the whole
backyard with extensive lights. It was really sweet.”

“Who are you trying to convince right now? Me or you?” Shane wondered making her face
scrunch up in confusion and he spun his finger out to point at her. “This is the first time you’ve
ever mentioned your husband and your children. You’re here all the time and working so hard. I
can’t tell if you are trying to convince me that you have the perfect happy family or yourself.”

“I don’t get what you mean by that,” she began, reaching for the photo that she kept on the corner
of her desk from when Avery was first born. Turning the picture, she showed Shane the photo that
she kept of her family there making Shane smirk. Leaning forward, Shane took the frame and
pulled it in closer to him to observe the photo. “The boy is Negan Junior, but he likes to be called
NJ. The middle one is Isabella and the baby is Avery.”
“Which makes daddy here Negan?” Shane lifted his gaze from the photo for a moment to see her
nod her head in response. With a shake of his head, Shane snickered and set the photo back down
on the desk for her. “I’m still not buying it.”

“Buying what?” she didn’t know how to respond as Shane sat before her with a smug expression.

“You have this big office. Look at all the frames you have on the walls. All of them are dedicated
to you and your job. All you have of your family is what? A five by seven photo on the corner of
your desk?” Shane pushed further, his eyebrows bouncing up before biting at his bottom lip. “If
you were this proud mama that I think you’re trying to sell that you are you would have photos all
over of your children and husband. But you don’t.”

“Okay, enough,” she requested making Shane lean in closer to her again, his brown eyes gazing her
over intensely. “I think we should end our night together.”

“Something tells me you are just dying to break the whole happily married mother routine and just
be wild…” Shane rumbled, his dark eyes narrowing while he stared out at her with an amused
expression. “And I’m the perfect guy to do it with. I’m hot. I like kids. I don’t care that you’re
married. I’m a great fuck and an incredible kisser.”

“So is my husband,” she alerted Shane making Shane roll his eyes and drop back into his seat
again. “You’re good-looking Shane, I give you that. And you’re charming in a gruff and tough kind
of way. But I’m married to a man that is great at kissing and really good at sex. And he’s got a big
dick.”

“And yet you’re here instead of being with him,” Shane reminded her once more, a long-extended
sigh falling from his lips. “If things were as good as you are making them out to be, things would
be a whole lot different. Maybe your husband is Mr. Perfect, but something is still missing in your
life. Maybe you don’t want perfect. And that’s okay. Not everyone wants that perfect Brady Bunch
family life. Nothing wrong with that.”

Hearing Shane say that actually made a whole lot of sense even though she hated to admit it. Negan
was perfect. Her family was perfect. Yet it drove her crazy lately. Why did it take Shane saying
something for her to actually realize that he was right? She hated it.

“I think you should leave,” she suggested with a swallow setting her things on her desk knowing
that she was starting to get uncomfortable with things. “We’re done here for tonight.”

Before she could get up, she felt Shane swiftly moving forward to cup her face in his hands firmly
pulling her forward to bring her to him so he could demand her lips in a kiss that shocked her. It
was rough with him trying to make a point as his lips caressed over hers. Closing her eyes, she
didn’t push Shane away at first, but once she started thinking about things, she reached up to place
her hand in over the center of his chest.

“This feels wrong,” she confessed feeling his forehead pressing up against hers. The warmth of his
breath was felt over her lips and she swallowed down hard. It made her feel guilty knowing that she
had a family back at home. “I’m sorry.”

“Well, let’s just give it another shot and see how it feels,” Shane offered stroking his fingers over
the side of her face. It made her let out a shuddering breath when he brought their lips together
again. This time he kissed less aggressively. The tip of his tongue grazed over her bottom lip
before he dragged it across her top lip. Claiming her mouth with his, he deepened the kiss until the
sound of something knocking was heard making the two of them separate.
“Negan,” Y/N breathed out seeing him standing at the door to her office holding a bag in his hands.
Pulling back and away from Shane, she stood up to see that Negan’s face was pale. He looked
crushed, his eyes lowering down toward the ground after he had visibly just caught the two of them
kissing. “I can explain.”

“I uh…I was just bringing you some of the dinner that I cooked since I hadn’t heard from you and
thought you might be hungry. You missed breakfast,” Negan muttered, lifting his free hand to
caress over the back of his neck. Shrugging his shoulders, he pointed toward the bag and cleared
his throat. “It’s chicken parmesan with some of the spaghetti that I make.”

“Negan,” she called out to him seeing him set the bag down on the floor beside the door. He
stopped at the door as if he wanted to say something but instead just walked away making her heart
skip a beat inside of her chest. Going to walk away, she felt Shane grabbing a hold of her hand to
stop her from running away. “Let go.”

“Listen, I can tell that you aren’t happy,” Shane reasoned with her trying to get her to look at him as
he palmed in over the side of her face. “You know you’re not happy. Maybe him seeing that was a
sign that it’s okay for the two of us to try something here. Maybe after twelve years you’re ready to
take a shot at something different.”

“I’m sorry, I just…” she pulled from Shane’s grasps and ran off after Negan. By the time she got to
the elevators they were already closing. Hitting the elevator doors, she cussed out and hit the
button repeatedly to wait for the other one. By the time the elevator came up she hoped that she
could catch Negan before he left since she left everything in her office with Shane. Once she got to
the bottom floor, she ran outside feeling the rain pouring down in over her. Almost immediately a
crack of lightening followed making her groan out since she knew she was going to get soaked.
Looking to her side she saw Negan heading for his truck and ran out after him. “Negan!”

As Negan went to open the door, she reached for his hand and pulled him back to stop him from
leaving. There was something dead in his eyes and he refused to look at her after what he saw,
“You’re just going to leave?”

“Sam is watching the kids and I don’t want to bother you,” Negan whispered, his jaw twitching
and she knew that he was getting emotional. After twelve years she knew what that face looked
like. There was a silence between the two of them as Negan shook his head. “So is that why you
stay at work late nights? Because of him?”

“No, he just kissed me for the first time, I swear,” she asserted seeing Negan’s hurt hazel eyes
finally meeting hers. Releasing his wrist, she reached up to brush her hand over her forehead and
felt her whole-body tense. “Every time I’ve been here, it’s been because of work. Not because of
Shane. I swear.”

“Okay,” was all that left Negan’s lips and she felt offended. With the rain pouring down over them
and everything that happened between them, she couldn’t believe that was it.

“Why are you not furious?” Y/N wondered making Negan’s eyes finally raise to meet her stare.
“The Negan I knew would have beat the shit out of that guy for even putting his hands on me. The
Negan I knew was so passionate that he would be in a fit of rage right now because of what he
saw.”

“What do you want me to do Y/N? You want me to go back up there and beat the hell out of a cop
because my heart is broken?” Negan threw his hands up in the air, his lips parting. There was so
much he wanted to say, but he was all caught up inside of himself. “The woman I married told me I
was the only man for her. Yet, I come here and see you kissing another man, a cop nonetheless and
how am I supposed to react?”

“Be mad Negan. Just do something. Don’t walk away with your head down and your tail between
your legs,” she yelled at him watching Negan’s jaw clenching while he stood idle before her
waiting for her to say whatever she wanted to next. “You running away is not the way to handle
things.”

“I don’t know what you want me to do. I’m being the best possible husband I can be to you. I’m a
good father to our children. I show up for them every day. I work to keep a relationship with you
and them. I do everything in my power to keep you happy and you aren’t happy,” Negan reminded
her of all the things that had been happening between them for quite some time. “I’m everything I
promised I would be for you, but you aren’t happy. So when I come here to give you some dinner
and I see you with another man, it all makes sense.”

“No, it doesn’t because I’m not sleeping with Shane. I was working,” she maintained, her heart
hammering in her chest and her body shaking. Obviously, Negan didn’t believe her and that made
her mad because it was always one hundred percent her job that was keeping her. “I’m not fucking
around Negan. I never was. I was working and Shane made a move on me just now. That’s all it
was.”

“And you looked like you were so eager to push him away,” Negan pointed out with tension in his
voice, the vein at the side of his neck bulging slightly as he shook his head. “I knew that something
was wrong, but I never thought it was this.”

“This…what you saw with Shane? That wasn’t what the problem is,” she scoffed, turning away
from Negan and placing her hand over her forehead trying to gather herself, but she wasn’t calming
down. “See, even someone I work with can see that I’m not happy and that’s why he made a move
on things. Shane wasn’t the problem because I’ve never cheated on you with Shane. I’m unhappy
because you…the kids…everything is driving me crazy.”

“What is that supposed to mean?” Negan muttered behind her making her turn on her heel to stare
out at him with an upset expression.

“It means that I’m miserable when I’m at home Negan. I’m here at work because I would rather be
here at work,” she explained to him, her voice breaking when she finally erupted with all the
thoughts she had been having for a while now. “When I get home, I have to sit in the car so I can
mentally prepare myself to go into the house. Work is the one thing that makes me happy. It’s why
I put my everything into my job. And as much as I hate to admit it, it’s more important to me than
you and the kids are.”

“Wow,” Negan choked, his hazel eyes getting big when she dropped that on him. “I don’t, I don’t
fucking know what to say about that.”

“There is nothing that you can say about it Negan. It’s just how I feel. So when I have you and NJ
lecturing me about how I need to make time for my family when the time I already make for my
family is overwhelming me upsets me so fucking much. My job is always going to take precedence
over everyone because it’s the thing I care the most about,” she stressed making Negan’s bottom
lip tremble, his head slowly nodding while he stood before her motionless. “I should have listened
to my father all those years ago. I was so charmed by you that I wanted to believe that a family is
what I wanted, but it wasn’t. I didn’t want five children. I never even wanted children. When he
told me that I was making a mistake, I didn’t want to believe him because I was so fucking in love
with you that I was blind to the truth.”

“Was?” Negan repeated that word, his breathing broken when he gazed her over. “You don’t love
me anymore?”

“I don’t know,” she was honest, her eyes gazing him over when she rest against the truck.
Shrugging, she didn’t know what to say at this point. So many thoughts were swirling around in her
mind and it was hard keeping her mouth closed on how she was feeling. “I don’t know Negan.
Between you and the kids, I’m miserable.”

“I think you just got hit with a bad case of postpartum depression after Avery was born,” Negan
insisted with a tremoring breath moving forward to try to cup her face in his large hands when she
pulled away from him. “Baby, I just think we can get professional help. We can go and talk to
someone. Make things right.”

“It will never be right Negan,” she maintained with a whimper hearing his breathing broken. There
were tears in Negan’s eyes when the sound of thunder surrounded them. “I know how I feel when I
come home. No therapist is going to change that for me.”

“So what are you saying?” Negan’s hands were shaking and he forced them into his pockets. “Are
you saying you want to get a divorce?”

“Is that what you want?” she wondered making Negan immediately shake his head.

“No, of course not. I love you. I love you more than anything,” Negan stated with a frown
attempting to stroke over the side of her face after pulling one of his hands from his pocket.
Sweeping his thumb in over her jawline, she felt tension flood her body. Maybe her mind was
twisting things for her, but with how she felt right now she realized that Shane was somewhat right.
She was incredibly unhappy with her life right now and she was wrong for hiding it this whole
time. Pretending that everything was okay when it wasn’t. “You and the children mean everything
to me. When I told you that I would love you for the rest of my life, I meant it. My heart belongs to
you and only you. So I would rather us work on us. For our family. For us.”

A silence surrounded them while Negan closed the distance between them. When he went to bend
down to kiss her, she pulled away and reached for his wrist. Lowering it down, she felt a pain in
her chest when a lump grew in her throat. Shaking her head, she remembered how she had felt for
the last few weeks alone and she knew that it wasn’t healthy for her to feel the way that she did.

“I can’t do this anymore,” she pulled herself away from Negan hearing his hurt breath fill the air.
Stepping back toward the building, she was at a loss of words. “I shouldn’t feel like this Negan. I
think you’re right. A divorce is exactly what I want. It’s what I need.”

Once she said it, misery filled Negan’s features and it was obvious that he was crying, but right
now she was so upset herself that she didn’t care, “I’ll get someone to write the papers up for us.
Don’t worry about me coming home tonight. I’ll stay at the office on the couch. There is an
apartment building down the street that my co-worker lives in. Tomorrow I’ll speak to a realtor and
I’ll just get an apartment there.”

“Y/N, please…” Negan begged when she started heading back for the doors of her office.
Grabbing a hold of her wrist, he got her to turn back toward him. “Things are emotional right now
and I understand that. Just please, don’t think erratically like this. Whatever is bothering you,
whatever I’m doing wrong, I will work on it. Give me a chance to make things right, please.”

“That’s the problem Negan, you’re perfect,” she swallowed down, pulling herself from his grasp
seeing the broken expression that flooded his features. “I always told you that you were too good
for me. And I was right. Asking you to change would be wrong because according to everyone
else, you’re perfect. I’m just not happy. And I can’t feel this way every day of my life Negan. So
no. My decision isn’t going to change.”

Letting out a defeated breath, Negan stood there in the rain when she headed for the door. Stopping
at the door, she could see that Negan was just standing there. Right now, she thought this was the
best decision. It shouldn’t have to be like this. Feeling guilty and miserable doing something that
made her happy. Lately NJ and Negan were making her feel horrible about the thing that made her
the happiest. If she kept up at it, it would lead to more fights and more days of her having to coach
herself to even walk into the house at night.

Once she got to the elevator, she stole one final look back to see that Negan was sitting on the
ground with his back pressed against the wall of the building. His head was buried between his
knees in the rain and she cleared her throat. After everything, this just seemed like the right
decision no matter how much it hurt Negan.
 Chapter 20
Chapter Summary

Months pass after Y/N asked Negan for a divorce and she had to deal with the
ramifications of her choices making her realize that she made some mistakes.

Chapter Notes

There is a scene in this chapter where someone is aggressive and abusive toward a
child so I want to pre-warn that. I've been having a lot of trouble with writing and
finding inspiration lately, but I finished this chapter and wanted to at least put this up
for people. There are two chapters left after this. So there is that. Thanks to those that
read this.

“Come on,” Y/N muttered to herself looking at the time after she had been waiting for what
seemed like forever sitting in front of the home that Negan shared with their children. It had been
months since she had asked Negan for a divorce and since she asked of that they had made an
agreement that she would get the children every other weekend. Since she knew Negan was the
better parent, it only made sense for Negan to be their primary care giver. Especially since he had
the big home and she just had an apartment in the city. Dropping her head back, she felt incredibly
stressed feeling like this was on purpose. She had texted Negan to let him know she was there to
pick up the children a while ago, but this waiting was being dragged out longer than expected.
Hearing the sound of a bark, Y/N lowered her head to see that the front door was opening. “Shit.”

Negan had Avery in his arms and was carrying all of the children’s things. It looked like Negan
was trying to coach one of the children out of the house and it made her chest ache. Since she had
asked for the divorce, Negan looked like shit. His beard was longer along with his hair that was
messy. But he still looked like a soccer dad dressed in a pair of gray sweats with a white tank top
underneath the opened jacket. His hair was slicked back when Isabella came out of the house with
her backpack. They were all waiting for Negan who was obviously bickering with NJ who didn’t
want to leave. After some urgings Negan was finally able to get NJ out of the house. When they
were all out, Negan walked them to the car and Y/N popped the trunk for him to put the children’s
stuff in the back. After he was done, Negan opened up the back to get the child seat ready for
Avery.

Looking in the rearview mirror she could see that Negan was still wearing his wedding ring and
she huffed. That night she asked for a divorce is the day that she took her rings off and put them
away. They sat in the top drawer of her dresser at her apartment, yet Negan was still wearing his. It
made her sigh and she lowered her gaze to focus on something else. Once Negan had Avery
strapped in, he peppered loving kisses against the side of her face and Avery clung to his cheeks.

“I love you daddy,” Avery giggled making Negan give a sad expression but he feigned a smile and
gave his daughter a nod. “Miss you.”
“I’ll miss you too sweetheart,” Negan gave her one final kiss before crawling out of the back to talk
to both Isabella and NJ who were standing beside the car with him.

“Hey baby,” Y/N reached back to grab for Avery’s hand, squeezing it faintly in hers.

“Hi mommy,” Avery smiled back brightly. At least their youngest was still happy around her. She
was too young to truly understand what was going on between Negan and Y/N.

Looking toward the other three she could see that Negan was giving a pep-talk to both of them
caressing his fingers through their dark hair. NJ looked miserable while he stood before Negan
with his big hazel eyes locked on his father. Attempting to listen in, Y/N couldn’t tell what they
were saying, but she knew that Negan was doing what Negan always did. Which was try to coach
their children and give them a positive outlook on things.

Isabella was the first one to give Negan a big hug and then Negan bent down to kiss her on the
cheek squeezing her real tight. Once she got in the car, Isabella had a hard time looking at her
mother as she pulled on her seatbelt. Negan closed the door behind Isabella and then took some
time to talk things out with NJ further.

“Would you please tell your brother to get in the car?” Y/N requested of Isabella who simply
shrugged her shoulders like she didn’t know how to respond to her mother’s request. After a while,
NJ allowed his father to hug him and kiss him before he moved around the car to the other side to
get in the car with them. “Are we all set?”

“Why don’t you come up to the house to get us?” Isabella wondered, her eyes watching as Negan
stood at the center of the yard with his hands in his pockets while he watched them get ready to
leave. “Don’t you want to talk to daddy or see the puppies?”

“I don’t really want to talk to your daddy right now unless I have to Isabella,” Y/N informed her
daughter looking back over her shoulder to see that NJ rolled his eyes and rest his head against the
window. “And I’m sure the dogs are doing perfectly fine.”

“Oliver misses you,” Isabella declared with a frown, brushing her fingers through her long hair
while Y/N managed to get the car started up. Pulling his hand from his pocket, Negan waved
goodbye to the kids. With the expression over Negan’s features she knew that it killed Negan to
give the children up to her every other weekend. The children were his life and she knew that. She
couldn’t imagine what he was like without them at home. “Cooper doesn’t understand why you
aren’t home. He goes to the bed and just lays in your spot.”

“Cooper will learn to adapt just like the three of you have to do,” Y/N commented driving away
from the home she used to share with Negan seeing that Negan remained at the center of the yard.
“How was school?”

“We don’t have school right now mommy,” Isabella reminded her mother making Y/N huff loudly
when she remembered that they were out of school for the summer.

“She doesn’t even remember our birthdays, how do you expect her to remember our school
schedule?” NJ quipped to his younger sister since they both had birthdays during her separation
with Negan. It made Y/N look back in the rearview mirror knowing that she missed the parties that
they threw for them, but still got them presents and had something for them a few days later at her
apartment.

“What did you say?” Y/N asked of her son to repeat what he said, but his hazel eyes refused to look
up at her when he lowered his head down to look at the handheld game system that Negan had
gotten him. “I’m speaking to you NJ.”

When she was met with silence still, she stopped at the next red light and stared back at her son
who completely avoided her, “Negan?”

“He’s still not talking to you mom,” Isabella stressed to her mother making Y/N scoff knowing that
NJ had been keeping this up for a while now. “He hasn’t been talking to you after you missed his
game.”

“I don’t understand why you are still angry at me for that. You knew that I wasn’t going to be able
to make it,” Y/N tried to get her son’s attention, but it fell on deaf ears while NJ kept his head
down looking at his game blocking her out completely. “I told you from the start that I wasn’t
going to be able to come.”

“Well, then you said you might come and he waited for you. Instead of doing good at the game, he
was looking for you and he did really bad,” Isabella explained making Y/N’s throat tense up
hearing her middle child explaining everything to her.

“Your team still won NJ. Regardless of if you played badly or not,” Y/N prompted NJ of what she
knew to be true since people made a big deal about Negan leading the team to winning. “I don’t
deserve to be ignored for this.”

“He’s also embarrassed that you and daddy are divorced,” Isabella claimed making Y/N smirk and
shake her head when she saw the light turned green again. “Kids are harsh about that kind of stuff.
And we like being at home.”

“We’re separated,” Y/N corrected her children of what she knew to be true. “Because your daddy
refuses to sign the divorce papers that I sent him. So right now, your daddy and I are just separated
because daddy is being a jerk.”

NJ scoffed from the back seat and rolled his eyes visibly hating that she was shit talking his father.
NJ leaned into whisper something to Isabella who listened to him closely before nodding her head.

“Is your boyfriend at your apartment?” Isabella questioned out loud making Y/N grasp the wheel
tightly while she drove toward her apartment building. That was a question that NJ undoubtedly
coached his sister into asking.

“Yeah, Shane is at the apartment like all the other times,” Y/N answered them making both NJ and
Isabella make faces that showed they hated the idea of that. “The three of you are going to have to
get used to Shane being around.”

“Do you miss seeing Noah and Sam?” Isabella asked instead of responding to her about her
comment on Shane. Bringing up Negan’s children that he had with two other women always made
things uncomfortable for her. “I don’t think they understand why you don’t come to see them
either. You were their mom too and…”

“I’m not their mom. I was their stepmother,” Y/N immediately corrected her daughter knowing that
while Sam grew up with her, Sam was an adult now and she assumed Sam would not be happy with
her for doing what she did to her father. “When I get divorced from your father, they are no longer
going to be anything to me. So they should get used to not having me around.”

“But you were in Noah’s life longer than you were mine,” Isabella pointed out her voice stuttering
and it was clear how young she still was with how she was talking to Y/N. It was strange how
Isabella was the only one of her children that were talking. Even Avery had gotten quieter around
her after everything. And of course NJ didn’t want to talk to her. “So you’re his mom too. They
both love you too.”

“It’s complicated honey,” Y/N explained with a frown pulling in the parking lot that was beneath
the apartment building. It was a pain in the ass lugging everything up to her apartment. Carrying
Avery and most of their things, they took the elevator up to her apartment and when she got the
door open, they heard the booming sound of a football game on the television. Shane’s voice was
yelling at the screen when NJ pushed through to go straight to the room that she had for them.
“You know I thought you guys would like this apartment with all the windows.”

“Yeah, it’s pretty,” Isabella acknowledged moving over toward the windows that were in the
distance to stare down at the city from Y/N’s apartment. With how loud the television was, Avery
clung to Y/N and Y/N knew that Shane hadn’t realized that they were back yet.

“Shane!” Y/N called out to him hearing the television turn off and Shane hopped up onto the large
couch that he was spread across. Jumping over the back of it, he quickly moved to meet her at the
door with a big cheesy smile. “Can you help me carry these to their room?”

“Sure thing,” Shane accepted grabbing her things and offering up a smirk when he saw that Avery
was staring up at him with her big hazel eyes. “Hey there little one. Look at those pretty eyes of
yours. It’s good to see you again.”

Avery’s eyes got bigger before she turned her head away from Shane and buried her head in against
the center of Y/N’s chest making Y/N hold onto Avery tighter, “She’s shy. She’ll get used to you
soon. Her father never put her down so she’s just used to him and not other men.”

“We’re going to be friends soon,” Shane frowned reaching out to caress his hand in over the center
of Avery’s back before taking the things that Y/N asked of him toward the bedroom. Following
Shane in, Y/N knew that she had an area for all three of them. She was working on getting more
rooms built in her apartment because it was big enough but right now the children all had to be
together in a room that was still big enough for them. NJ was sitting at the corner of the room on
his bed with his head buried in his game. “Hey bud. How are you doing?”

Instead of answering Shane, NJ kept his head down and Shane smirked looking to Y/N who gave
him a shake of her head as if to hint that Shane should leave him alone, “We’re going to order
some pizza or something for tonight. You okay with that?”

“I’m okay with that,” Isabella piped in when she walked into the room and moved over toward her
bed to hop on top of it. “I’d like one with extra cheese please.”

“Got it,” Y/N gave her daughter a wink before allowing Avery down. Avery went over to sit with
Isabella after grabbing a stuffed animal that Negan had packed for her. Heading to the kitchen, Y/N
looked for the number to the nearest pizza place and felt arms hooking around her when she pulled
out her cell phone. “Shane.”

“I can see why you were so desperate to get away from them,” Shane slurred pressing kisses over
the side of her neck making her let out a shallow breath. “That son of yours is a real asshole.”

“Shane,” she muttered his name looking back over her shoulder at him with a glare seeing him toss
his hands up in the air and shrug.

“I like the girls. The girls are sweet,” Shane clarified moving around the big counter that was in her
kitchen bracing his weight on the countertop. “Avery and Isabella are nice to have during the
weekend, but it’s definitely overwhelming. Your son is a sharp looking little dude but he’s a dick
and you know that I’m right.”

“It’s complicated,” she frowned knowing that she found herself saying that a lot. “I hurt his
feelings by missing his game and not being at his birthday party.”

“He’s twelve, it’s time to grow up. It’s something I would expect from a six-year-old, not a twelve-
year-old,” Shane rambled on making her cringe over the fact that her boyfriend was trash talking
her son. Then again, she knew that she had complained to him several times about the things that
were going on in her life. “I get why Junior drove you away from wanting a family if he acted like
that all the fucking time.”

“It wasn’t just Negan Junior,” she motioned him to be quiet as she ordered the pizzas for them.
Once she was done, she avoided the conversation by going to spend time with Avery and Isabella
since they actually wanted to interact with her. By the time the pizza showed up, the two girls were
out in the large living room playing a game with her and Shane. NJ had stayed in the bedroom with
the door partially opened and when everything was ready, she called out to her son. “NJ the pizza
is here.”

In the kitchen she got the food ready for all of them helping Avery at the table. Cutting up Avery’s
pizza, Y/N made sure that there were pieces for her to grab while Isabella helped herself to a big
piece. They were all seated by the time that NJ showed up to the kitchen. Walking to the fridge, he
grabbed himself a coke before sitting down at the opposite end of the large table she had where she
had placed his pizza.

Instead of eating, he continued to just play his game that he had and she let out a long sigh,
“Negan, put your game down and just eat. Then you can do whatever you want.”

Keeping up with ignoring Y/N, NJ kept playing his game and took a sip of his coke before leaning
back in the chair to keep playing making Shane clear his throat, “Buddy, your mother is talking to
you.”

“He ate before he came here,” Isabella justified her brother’s actions with a mouthful of her pizza
looking to Y/N with big eyes. “He’s probably not hungry. Him and daddy made a lot of desserts
together. They like doing that. So he ate a lot before this.”

“It sounds like you had a lot of sweets then, so you should eat at least a piece,” Y/N tried again
with NJ knowing that it was like talking to a brick wall. After a minute, NJ grabbed the pizza and
took a small bite of it and then dropped it back on the plate with a plop. “What game are you
playing right now?”

Once again, she was met by silence.

“I know you’re angry with me Negan, but at some point, you are going to have to talk to me,” Y/N
muttered watching the way that Shane looked between her and NJ. “I told you from the start that I
couldn’t make your game and with your dad…sometimes parents don’t stay together. That
happens.”

“More please,” Avery finished the amount of pizza Y/N had given her and Y/N stood up from the
table to reach for Avery’s plate. Cutting up the rest of the piece Y/N had set aside for Avery, Y/N
placed the plate back in front of Avery and watched her pick at the pieces that were there.

“Would you prefer one of the other kinds of pizza that we got?” Y/N stared out at NJ knowing that
she had just given him a piece of cheese and she really had no idea what kind of pizza he liked. It
made her feel guilty knowing that it was Negan that did everything when they were together. Only
Negan would be able to know what all of their children loved because she had been too focused on
her job. “I have pepperoni, a supreme one…”

“Your mother is talking to you son,” Shane snapped his fingers at NJ making him look up at Shane
and just stare out at him with his hazel eyes. With NJ being quiet it made Shane even more furious.
“You should learn to be respectful and answer her.”

Rolling his eyes, NJ smirked and looked back down at the video game that he was playing making
Shane’s face flush over with red, “It’s fine.”

“It’s not fine,” Shane shook his head, his dark eyes falling back onto NJ. “You know this whole
time that I have known NJ he hasn’t said a damn word to me or you. I don’t know what his father
is teaching him or making him do…”

“Daddy is not the person who tells him to stay quiet. Actually daddy tells us all to be really nice to
you,” Isabella immediately corrected Shane making Shane huff out. “Daddy wants everything to be
good for us so he tells us to be nice to both you and mommy. He just wants all of us happy. NJ is
just upset because mommy picked work over us. She picked you over us.”

“That’s not true,” Y/N responded hating to hear that come from her daughter’s mouth. But she
could see why they would think of it that way since Shane was living with her and she was with
Shane every day instead of being with them. “Shane…I didn’t…I didn’t pick Shane over the three
of you.”

“We just really don’t like it here,” Isabella was honest looking around the apartment. “Not much
for a kid to do here. We just like it at home better. Our backyard is fun. We have our dogs. We love
daddy a lot.”

“Yeah. I miss daddy,” Avery agreed with what Isabella said making Y/N drop her fork down on
her plate and caress her fingers through her hair shakily showing that she was stressed.

“Well you’re going to have to get used to everything that is here,” Shane interrupted the discussion
making Y/N sigh loudly. “Do you know how much I would have loved to live in a place like this
as a kid? This is a really nice apartment. You’re lucky your mother has a place like this.”

“Our home is nicer,” NJ finally spoke up not bothering to look up from his video game system
making Shane look back over his shoulder at NJ. Shane’s forehead creased and he looked to Y/N
knowing that was the first time he ever heard Negan Junior speak.

“Put your game down,” Shane demanded of NJ but her son continued to ignore Shane. “I said put
your game down now.”

“It’s fine, leave him alone,” Y/N muttered from across the table seeing that Shane was getting
heated. Isabella and Avery were staring out at Shane from their seats not sure how to react with
him raising his voice to NJ.

“Your kid needs to learn some manners Y/N. You shouldn’t just accept him treating you like shit
because you are living your life the way that you want. You put up with twelve years of shit before
deciding to finally pick yourself for once,” Shane stammered, his eyebrow arching when he pushed
the plate in closer to NJ. “Put your game down and eat your dinner, now!”

“NJ, please just eat,” Y/N begged of her son who continued to ignore them while drinking his soda.
Gasping out, she watched Shane pushing away from the table and grabbing the device from NJ’s
hands. Tossing the handheld device against the wall caused it to shatter making NJ stand up to go
grab it, but Shane placed his hand in over the center of NJ’s back to force him back into his seat.
Pushing the plate in front of NJ, Shane was clearly trying to get Negan Junior to finally do what
Y/N had been asking of him, but he was doing it all wrong. “Shane!”

“You can’t do that!” NJ grimaced in pain with the way that Shane was grabbing onto him. With the
way he was wiggling beneath Shane’s grasp, it was clear that NJ was uncomfortable and trying to
get away from Shane. No matter how much he tried though, it wasn’t working. “My dad bought
me that!”

“I can do whatever I want when you’re in this apartment. Eat your food now,” Shane snapped, his
hand still firmly placed over NJ’s shoulders. Pushing NJ’s head in closer to the plate it almost
looked like Shane was going to smash NJ’s face against the piece of pizza. “I said eat your food!”

“I’m not hungry!” NJ snarled when Shane slid his hand up further toward NJ’s neck pushing
harder. “I said I’m not hungry! Stop!”

Getting up, Y/N immediately moved around the table and placed herself between NJ and Shane
grabbing a firm hold of Shane’s wrist to get him to let go of NJ. Once she had gotten Shane away
from NJ, something changed in Shane’s dark eyes and he stepped back away from her, but she still
had her grasp on Shane’s wrist. “Never do that again Shane. Or I swear…”

“I’m just standing up for you,” Shane blurt out throwing his arms up in the air making all of them
uncomfortable with how angry he got. “That kid is disrespectful as hell. The way he treats you isn’t
right. He wouldn’t even be here right now if it wasn’t for you.”

“You can go to your room,” Y/N looked back at NJ seeing that he had tears in his eyes when he got
up from his chair to go over to grab the gaming device that Shane had undoubtedly just broken.
Looking it over, NJ frowned and then swiftly moved into his room. After NJ left, Isabella pushed
away from the table and left to be with her brother. It made Y/N frown and she saw the way that
Avery was staring out at her with big eyes. “You want to go be with your brother and sister?”

Avery simply nodded her head, keeping her mouth shut showing by the way that she was looking
at Shane that she was scared being around him. Picking Avery up, Y/N allowed Avery to her feet
watching her little legs move swiftly to the room that she had for the kids.

“I don’t understand you. You let them walk all over you when you’re the parent and they are the
children,” Shane threw his hand out toward the direction where her children had disappeared into.
“Avery and Isabella, I like them. I understand them, but that fucking boy treats you like trash and
you’re okay with it?”

“He’s hurt Shane. He’s fucking hurt,” she declared noticing the way that his nose wrinkled by her
response. After the way Shane touched her son, she found herself wound up with her heart
hammering inside of her chest. “NJ is a good kid. I just…I missed a lot in his life and they do really
love their father. I’m the fuck up, not them.”

“See this was your problem back then when you decided to get a separation from your husband.
You blamed yourself for wanting more. You wanted something different because you were
miserable. You hated NJ and Negan,” Shane debated how she felt when she asked Negan for a
divorce. “They were the two that made you the most miserable. Now that he’s here you are
coddling him and allowing that behavior. I like kids Y/N, but that fucking kid needs to get his shit
together. He’s part of the reason that you left his fucking father. You didn’t want to go home
because of him. If he didn’t make you and Negan fight all the time about him, you’d still probably
be with his fucking father.”
The sound of something falling was heard and she looked to see that NJ was standing at the
entrance of the kitchen. There were tears streaming down his face when he undoubtedly heard
what Shane had just said. Stepping forward, she tried to reach for NJ but he pulled away from her
letting out a shuddering breath.

“You left dad because of me?” NJ whimpered making Y/N frown and she looked back to see that
Shane was lowering down to the seat that was at the table. Rubbing the back of his head, Shane
shrugged his shoulders and Y/N tried to comfort her son again but he moved away from her. “You
hated me that much? I’m the reason that you never came home?”

“That’s not…that’s…” Y/N tried to find it in herself to lie and the fact she didn’t say something
immediately made NJ drop his head forward. Even if that was how she felt at the time, it wasn’t
something that NJ should have ever heard out loud. “NJ…”

“Why do you even force me to be here?” NJ questioned, his hazel eyes meeting hers with his
bottom lip tremoring. Tears were sliding down his face while he waited for some kind of answer.
“You don’t even love me. Is it to torture dad? Because you know how much he loves all of us?
How much he loves you?”

“It’s because I love you NJ,” she reasoned with her son hearing him let out a pained sound.
Shaking his head, he stepped back and away from her. “I want to see my children.”

“No you don’t. Not for a long time,” NJ replied, lifting his hand to wipe at his face with the back
of his hand. “I want my mom back. My real mom.”

“I’m right here NJ,” she urged him to move in closer to her, but he pulled away from her again.
Regret flooded her veins that she even said that shit to begin with for Shane to spew out for NJ to
hear. “I do love you and I do want to spend time with you.”

“You don’t want to spend time with me. You haven’t in a long time. Since you got this new job.
You’re not my mom. Because you’re not who I remember,” NJ stayed firm, his voice raising as he
stared out at her and Y/N could see that her girls were standing by the door watching their big
brother break down. “I loved my mom. She was loving, caring…made me feel safe. Avery is too
young to know, but me and Isabella know better. We miss our mom. We miss our family. Once
you started at this new job, we lost her. Dad lost her. You’re no longer her. I miss her smile. I miss
her and dad putting me to bed at night. Every Christmas, her and dad would pull Isabella and I into
bed with them. We’d all cuddle up. You and dad would pepper us with kisses and wrap us up in
your arms while you and dad held hands. Or how Isabella and I used to find it so gross when you
and dad would kiss under the mistletoe all the time? You’d pretend it was on accident, but the two
of you just loved each other so much. Or how every birthday both you and dad would come into
our rooms singing happy birthday to us…together. Do you remember that? Or is my mom gone
completely?”

There was a silence that filled the air while Y/N felt an ache in her chest after hearing all of that
from her son. Tears burned at her eyes, but it was followed by the sound of Shane snorting and
sitting forward in his seat drawing both of their attention.

“How old are you kid?” Shane was the first to speak up ignoring the fact that what NJ actually said
had emotionally affected her. “You’re twelve, right? Your two-year-old sister acts older than you
do with things. I’m not sure which one of you is supposed to be the toddler. You’re mad at your
mother because she doesn’t put you to bed every night?”

Instead of answering Shane, NJ looked to Y/N waiting for her to say something. Her lips parted
and a tear slid down the side of her face, burning at her flesh. There was so much she wanted to
say, but nothing was coming out.

“That answers my question,” NJ cleared his throat and tried wiping at his face with his hands. “My
mother is gone.”

“Please wait,” Y/N watched NJ run back to the bedroom and slam the door shut behind him after
urging his sisters in with him. Going to reach for the door after she followed him, she grabbed onto
the knob and felt it locked. Huffing out, she rest her forehead against the door. After a minute or so
she felt a hand placing in over her shoulder and she waved Shane away from her. “Don’t touch me
right now. Just leave me alone.”

“Fine,” Shane held his hands up and tipped his head to the side. “I’ll go lay down for now. I just
think maybe you should just start trying to have days with your girls because nothing is going to
come from you having that boy here…”

“Shane,” she snarled at him hearing him huff. After hearing her he headed off toward the bedroom
that they shared together. Heading over toward the couch, she sat down and grabbed the pillow that
was beside her on the couch. Cuddling the pillow in closer to her, she stared at the door to her
children’s bedroom knowing that it should have never gotten to what it did tonight.

Honestly, she didn’t know why she started dating Shane. It was probably some kind of rebellious
phase after she had separated from Negan. It was probably to hurt Negan and she knew that, but
she didn’t even understand why she kept Shane around. What she really needed when she separated
from Negan was alone time, but instead she had Shane move in almost immediately with her.
Sometimes she thought it was because she was lonely and then other parts of her did think it was to
hurt Negan.

Looking around her living room she thought about what Shane had said to her when she first
decided to divorce Negan. There were no photos of her family in her apartment. Once she wrote off
Negan, she completely wrote off her family and she could see why NJ said the things to her that he
did.

Shifting on the couch, she stared out at the door and knew that she needed to give NJ some time to
calm down. Once he came out of the room, she was going to be ready to talk to him because it had
to be done. Until then, she was just going to wait it out alone.

It wasn’t a short process. In fact she had ended up falling asleep on the couch clutching onto the
pillow. It was the sounds of NJ’s voice that actually woke her up. With an uneven breath, her eyes
slowly fluttered to an open hearing NJ crying while he spoke. It was a faint whisper, but he was
undoubtedly crying. Pushing up, she looked around the room still having it blurry around her since
it was completely dark in the house except for the light coming from the kitchen.

“NJ?” Y/N called out pulling herself up from the couch to head over toward the kitchen. Once she
got to the kitchen, she saw NJ slamming the phone back onto the receiver and he looked back at
her with his hazel eyes seeming nervous as can be that she had caught him. “Who were you on the
phone with?”

“I wasn’t on the phone,” NJ blatantly lied to her making her eyebrow arch when he tried to move
around her to go back into his bedroom, but she stopped him by placing her hand over the center of
his chest. “I want to go back to my room.”

“We need to talk,” she insisted trying to get him to step back, but he struggled with her and she
placed her hands in over his shoulders to firmly get him to stop. “Negan Junior!”
“What?” NJ snapped at her, his hazel eyes full of anger and sadness at the same time making her
chest ache at the sight of it. Tears still lingered from him crying before she had come into the
kitchen with him. “I don’t want to talk to you.”

“I don’t care,” she responded with a firm shake of her head.

“That’s the problem mom. You don’t care,” NJ shot back at her making a sharp exhale fall from
her lungs when she stepped back and stared down at him. “I don’t want to be part of your life
anymore. I don’t want to see you anymore.”

“You don’t have a say in something like that,” she breathed out, her jaw flexing while his hurt
features stared up at her. “I know that I’ve hurt you and I get your feelings NJ, I do, but you can’t
just decide that I don’t get to see you anymore.”

“I don’t get it, you didn’t want anything to do with us when you were with dad,” NJ reminded her
making her throat go dry hearing her son trying to understand why she wanted to bother with them
now that she was separated from Negan. “You don’t want us here. You never wanted us, so forcing
us to come here is cruel. Why keep us here when dad is the one that loves us, not you.”

“I do love all of you,” she insisted making NJ roll his eyes and fold his arms out in front of his
chest. “I know that I messed up before, but I want to start to try to make things right for all of you.”

“Every other week on the weekends?” NJ grumbled under his breath, his jawline flexing while he
stared up at her with his young features. “Nothing is ever going to be right. None of us, none of us
want to be here with you. We hate Shane. We hate this apartment. Just stop trying to pretend to be
something that you aren’t!”

“Is this where you still want me to stay out of things?” a voice rumbled from behind them drawing
her attention back over her shoulder to see that Shane was standing at the door in just his athletic
pants hanging low at his hips. His arms were folded in front of his chest while he rest against the
doorframe.

“Please,” Y/N begged holding her hand up and he shrugged his shoulders heading back into the
bedroom. Having Shane putting his nose into things constantly was not helping. Especially when
he was the person that started all of this today.

“How can you like someone like him?” NJ snarled making her sigh and lift to pinch the bridge of
her nose feeling a headache developing from the stress of tonight. “He’s nothing like dad.”

“I think that was kind of the point,” she shrugged her shoulders hating that she was having this
conversation with her son. It was inappropriate and she really just thought at the beginning Shane
was a relationship of convenience for her. He was there and he was willing, so she accepted it and
just never really pushed it away from her. “Listen NJ, we have to talk about things.”

“I don’t have time,” NJ pushed through her heading back toward the bedroom. Following him
toward the bedroom before she could even follow him in, he was heading back out with his
backpack over his shoulder. At the same time he was trying to push the remainder of his tears away
from his face.

“Where do you think you’re going?” she grabbed a hold of NJ’s backpack when he went to move
around her, stopping him in his tracks.

“I’m leaving,” NJ declared trying to pull from her grasp, yanking on his backpack to get it from her
before throwing it back over his shoulder again. “I don’t have to stay here. I don’t want to stay
here. Not after what Shane did and said.”

“You’re not going to just walk out into the world and walk home NJ!” she stated with a grunt only
to hear the sound of a knock on the door. Everything inside of her tensed up when NJ’s face turned
pale and he looked toward the front door. “What did you do?”

Heading for the door, she heard NJ calling out to her when she pulled the door open to reveal
Negan at the front door. His expression was angry and suddenly things were starting to make
sense. Standing in the doorway, she felt NJ attempting to get around her, but she put up her arm to
stop him from leaving the apartment.

“It was your dad that you called?” Y/N wondered looking back at NJ whose big hazel eyes were
staring out at her with worry. “You can’t leave with your dad. It’s my weekend with you and you
aren’t going anywhere.”

“He said your boyfriend broke his game system and put his hands on him,” Negan informed her
making NJ’s face flush over with red. It made a lump develop in NJ’s throat when he gazed
between both of his parents. “He called me sobbing Y/N. Our son shouldn’t be afraid to be here
with you.”

“He’s not afraid to be here with me,” she reasoned with Negan hearing NJ clear his throat and nod
his head when he looked to her.

“We don’t feel safe here with Shane,” NJ was honest with his mother, his eyes still red from the
crying that he had done earlier. “None of us do. Not even Avery and she’s young. You can tell that
she’s scared. But Shane doesn’t hate the girls, he just hates me. So do you. So I’m going to go
home with dad.”

“This is bullshit,” she placed her hand in over the center of NJ’s chest to keep him from leaving. “I
deserve to have time with my children.”

“Then make Shane leave,” NJ blurt out making Y/N swallow down hard when he grasped tightly
to the strap of his backpack. “I know you don’t want me here to begin with, but if you want me
here like you say you do, I don’t feel safe being here with Shane.”

“Your father and I need to have a discussion. Together. Alone,” Y/N nodded back toward the
couch making NJ huff out loud and look to Negan with a begging expression. “We’re just going to
be out in the hallway together. I promise your dad won’t leave without talking to you.”

“Dad,” NJ whimpered looking to Negan for guidance and he gave NJ a nod to listen to Y/N.
Rolling his eyes, NJ moved to the couch and took a seat. Once Y/N saw that he was seated she
moved out into the hallway with Negan closing the door behind her.

Stepping before Negan, their eyes connected and she could tell that Negan was angry with her from
the things that he had undoubtedly heard from NJ when he snuck that call in to his father. Negan’s
eyes shifted, his jaw flexing while he waited for her to say something first. It was clear that Negan
was tired and he probably hadn’t slept in a while and the way he towered over her made her feel
small.

“Listen, I know things probably sounded bad, but it was really a misunderstanding,” she explained
holding her hands up in a defensive position. “NJ was keeping up with the whole not speaking to
me thing and Shane was trying to get him to talk to me. Shane just stepped out of place and I
corrected him for it.”
“Stepped out of place?” Negan repeated her words, his eyebrows bouncing up in what seemed like
frustration. “NJ said that Shane took the handheld game system I bought for him for his birthday
and threw it at the wall shattering it. Then apparently, he grabbed a firm hold of the back of our
son’s neck and kept forcing his head toward his dinner hurting him. Considering our son is not a
liar, I do tend to fucking believe him Y/N.”

Clearing her throat, she lowered her stare and felt her face flushing over with warmth, “Also
apparently, he heard Shane blaming him for the fact that you and I got separated? Did you really
tell that asshole that the reason you asked me for a divorce is because you hated NJ?”

“That’s not exactly what happened. Shane just took it that way,” she claimed knowing that she kind
of went on a huge vent the first time that she talked to Shane about her family and while she didn’t
want to believe that she said something like that, she wasn’t really sure what she did say. “I was
really angry at you and NJ at that time for always making me feel guilty. So that could have been
Shane’s interpretation of things.”

“Nice,” Negan grumbled under his breath and folded his arms out in front of his chest, his jaw
flexing in anger while he kept his stare locked on her. “I’m not going to force my son to be here
when he’s not comfortable. When you asked for this divorce, you told me that you would give me
full custody of the kids and just requested the one weekend every two weeks if you were available.
I’m doing this just to be nice. So if NJ wants to come home, I’m going to take him home.”

“Then I will never see my son because he doesn’t want to be here Negan,” she responded with
tension growing in her tone. Shaking her head, she knew that wasn’t something she was okay with.
“I should be able to see my son.”

A sigh escaped Negan’s throat when he finally lowered his head to look down at his feet. Pushing
his hands into his pockets, Negan’s Adam’s apple bounced in his throat while she stood before
him, “Did you sign those papers yet?”

“Really?” Negan snapped with a scowl over his face after raising his stare back up to her. “We’re
talking about the comfort of our son being at your home and you’re going to ask me if I signed the
fucking divorce papers?”

“That’s a no,” she frowned leaning back against the doorframe and sighing loudly. “I just think you
are dragging the kids along thinking that there will be something more here between the two of us.
They never gave Shane a shot from the start.”

“It doesn’t sound like Shane deserved a shot regardless,” Negan shot back, lifting his hand to point
it out at her. “And I tell you what? If that son of a bitch ever puts his hands on NJ again, I promise
you I will fucking kill him.”

“Don’t say that,” she hushed him making Negan immediately shake his head. “He’s a cop Negan.”

“I wouldn’t give a shit if he was the goddamn pope. If you touch my son, I will fucking break
every single fucking finger on your hands,” Negan was getting worked up and she found herself
thankful that she was the only person on this floor since he was making it clear that he was upset.
“I’m not kidding Y/N.”

“I know,” she acknowledged hearing his breathing loud when he shook his head. “I expect nothing
less from you.”

“I don’t get this,” Negan maintained his face twisting with frustration and confusion. “I never
thought you would be asking for a divorce. I never thought our children would be in this kind of
position. It’s not fair to them.”

“Parents get divorced all the time Negan,” she countered with a shrug of her shoulders. “I know
that it’s not fair to them, but sometimes two people just fall out of love.”

“One person,” Negan corrected her with a frown. “I never fell out of love with you. No matter how
mean you got. No matter how many times you hurt me or said something that brought me down. I
always loved you. I promised to love you for the rest of my life and I meant it.”

Looking to Negan’s left hand she still saw that he was wearing his wedding ring and it made her
clear her throat. Feeling a warmth flooding her body, she looked down and away from him hearing
him sigh, “I think you’re just going through something right now. I went through some shit when I
lost Lucille. I lost myself. I think when you get through this, you’re going to realize…”

“Negan,” she interrupted him, holding her hands up to stop him before he started. “I know how you
feel. I do. I just, I don’t know if I see it like you do.”

“You’re telling me you don’t miss anything?” Negan searched for an answer making the ache in
her chest grow. With those big hazel eyes staring into her soul she found it hard to even look at him
because she felt horrible. “The dogs? The children? Us?”

Ignoring the question, she knew that she had been feeling so many range of emotions since NJ
mentioned to her that he missed his mother and brought up their past together. Of course she
missed moments like that, she just…forgot about them since she had grown to be too busy in her
own life.

“You loved your life. You loved your job before you started working at this new place. I know it
was more money, but you were happy at your original job. You took this job because your father
convinced you to. You told me when we first got together that your father made your life miserable
and you kicked him out of it. I know what it’s like to have a shitty father Y/N. You know that, but
after he convinced you to have this job, I think it awoke some of those feelings he gave you before
we got together,” Negan spoke up stepping forward to reach out to sweep his thumb in over her
jawline to get her to look back up at him. “Your father made you hard and then you found me, you
found family with Sam and me. We made you happy. Your family made you happy. I think you
were already stressed and then the whole Avery thing happened and it is possible to still have
postpartum depression with your third child. And it can go for a very long time. You’re not weak
for asking for help.”

“Negan,” she closed her eyes feeling her bottom lip tremoring with his palm caressing in over the
side of her face. Lifting her hand, she held onto him and stroked her fingers against the back of his
hand. “I’m not good enough for you. Or them. I’ve known that. I’ve always known that.”

“Listen to me,” Negan whispered stepping forward to close the distance between the two of them.
“It’s not too late to fix things Y/N. I still love you. These kids love you. We can figure out
something. Get help. Go to a therapist, the both of us. Maybe as a family sometimes.”

“I don’t think I can fix the things I’ve done,” she responded, her eyes fluttering to an open when
Negan slid his other hand in over the side of her face to cup it tenderly. “I’ve been a really shitty
person over the last few years Negan. And over these last few months, I’ve been the worst. I don’t
deserve to fix things. All of you are too good for me. I’m a bad wife. I’m a bad mother. I’m a shitty
person.”

“I don’t think it’s all you’re just not a good person Y/N. I think you’ve had some troubles between
Avery being born along with all the stress. You were abused as a child and sometimes that shit
comes back to you in your adulthood. With this job, I think you were just out to get your father’s
approval again and you lost your way a little bit,” Negan reminded her making her let out a
tremoring breath and he could see that tears were developing in her eyes. “We can try to fix things,
make this whole thing better. I know that as a family…as a duo…we can fix this.”

With a shuddering breath, she felt Negan’s forehead pressing up against hers. Pressing her palm in
over the center of his chest, she slid it up toward the side of his neck before stroking at his chiseled
jawline. The warmth of his breath pressed over her lips drawing chills down her spine until the
sound of the door pulling open was heard.

“The fuck are you doing here?” Shane’s voice boomed making Negan slowly pull his head back to
gaze over at the new man in Y/N’s life. Taking his time, Negan lowered his hands and that anger
that was there when he arrived slowly flooded back into his features. “You shouldn’t even be
here.”

“He’s picking up NJ,” she alerted Shane with a frown knowing that after her conversation with
Negan it was for the best that NJ should leave if he wanted to leave. Shane stepped out into the
hallway with them and let out an amused breath. “NJ was uncomfortable being here and wants to
go home.”

“No, I don’t think so,” Shane shook his head making it known that he didn’t like the idea of that
when he stepped further into the hallway. “I don’t know what kind of bullshit you are flooding into
your son’s brain, but his mother isn’t a villain for wanting something in her life. She wasted twelve
years of her life trying to pretend that everything was okay and when she finally does what’s right
by her suddenly, she’s the bad guy? No. NJ is going to have to learn to live with the way that
things are. She has the right to reinvent her life and let me tell you something, you’re going to stop
trying to get in the way of things.”

“Listen buddy, I’m not going to step back and let shit go by when it comes to my children,” Negan
scoffed, standing up straighter. There was no way that Shane was going to intimidate him. “Which
now that we’re on the subject of my children…don’t ever put your hands on my son again.”

“What are you going to do about it if I do?” Shane mocked Negan, stepping forward to bring his
chest into Negan’s almost bumping him back with the power in his body making Negan smirk.
Reaching up, Negan brushed at his bottom lip with his thumb and smirked. “There is nothing you
can do to me if I do.”

“You have no idea what I’m capable of,” Negan warned, his stare narrowing and his eyes getting
darker when Shane smirked. “So don’t test me.”

“Get out of here,” Shane ordered making Negan shake his head when he looked to the open door to
see that NJ was still sitting on the couch watching them interact. “Now.”

“He’s taking NJ,” Y/N grabbed a hold of Shane’s arm only to feel Shane pull away from her.
Shoving into Negan made Negan huff loudly and his jaw flexed. “Shane, knock it off. I told you
what is going to happen here and this is none of your business.”

“It is my business because for once in your life you need to stop letting Negan and NJ run your
life,” Shane snapped at her, pointing his finger back and forth between her and Negan. His brown
eyes were angry and he was breathing heavily. “They don’t get to control your life anymore. Not
with me here because that’s bullshit.”

“NJ, let’s go,” Negan called out to his son only to let out a groan when Shane shoved him firmly
against the wall. Shoving back into Shane made the shorter man stumble back giving Negan a
smirk before nodding his head. With a grunt, Negan turned away when Shane firmly punched into
the side of Negan’s face. Taking a minute to gather himself, Negan gazed back at Shane and
nodded his head. “Thank you. Now you gave me a reason to defend myself without getting in
trouble.”

Gasping out, Y/N stepped out of the way when Negan tackled into Shane making Shane slam into
the wall behind him. Arms were throwing while Negan and Shane found themselves in a fight
making NJ scramble to the door in attempts to come and try to help his father.

“Stay there,” Y/N demanded of her son not wanting him to get hurt while Shane and Negan tore
into each other. Stepping forward, she tried splitting it up knowing that this was the last thing that
NJ needed to see. “Shane! Knock it off.”

Scrambling to get the fight split up, she grabbed a hold of Shane’s arm in attempts to get him to
stop. Trying to pull his arm away from her, Shane let out an angered sound before bringing his arm
back into the side of her face making her fall back to the ground hard. Almost immediately NJ
moved to his mother to make sure that she was okay.

“Shit,” Shane muttered realizing what he had done, but with what he had done it had only made
Negan more furious with the man before him. Managing to get Shane to the ground, Negan started
hitting him over and over again taking advantage of the moment. Each hit sounded brutal as it
echoed through the empty hallway followed by the grunts coming from Shane’s throat.

After several more hits, Negan held his fist over Shane and lifted his gaze to see that NJ was
staring out at him and he grunted under his breath. Curling his fingers into Shane’s dark hair,
Negan pulled his head up and made sure that Shane was staring out at him, “You touch her again
and I will destroy you. The same goes for my son. Never put your hands on my kids or Y/N again.”

Dropping Shane back down, Negan got up enough to move over to Y/N and NJ. Once he knelt
down to check on Y/N, NJ immediately scrambled to wrap his arms around Negan to hug him
tightly. Nuzzling his nose against the side of NJ’s neck Negan comforted his son leaving Y/N
feeling incredibly guilty.

“NJ, go get your sisters. All three of you are going home with your dad,” she instructed of her son
when NJ looked over his shoulder giving her a quick nod. When NJ ran off to do what she wanted,
Negan shifted to help her up from where she was on the floor. Embarrassment flooded her features
when she looked to see that Shane had pulled himself up into a seated position on the floor with his
head buried in his hands. “I’m sorry.”

“Come with us,” Negan pled, his hazel eyes trying to appeal to her, but honestly? She couldn’t. She
felt guilty. This was her fault to begin with. She made her bed with Shane and she was going to
have to live with it. After everything she did, there was no way that she could just go back home
with open arms. What Shane did? What she did and said? It was all so wrong and she didn’t
deserve this family. Not now, not ever. Shaking her head made Negan frown, but she knew that he
was too good for her. “Please.”

“I can’t,” she answered him with a miserable expression showing that she hated the choice she had
to make, but it was clear that she thought she had to do it. “I need to take care of things here. Just
please, take care of the kids. And tell NJ I’m sorry.”

With the sound of footsteps, she turned to see that NJ had both of his sisters with him. Reaching
down, she picked up Avery and gave her a big kiss on the cheek before handing her over to Negan.
Once she was done, she knelt down to Isabella and NJ to give them a big hug which surprised NJ
with the way that he was looking at her.
“I love you guys, I’m sorry,” she apologized again for feeling bad that it led to this. Her children
should have never had to experience the negativity and toxic environment that she put them in with
Shane. It wasn’t even like she liked Shane and this was the last thing that they deserved. “You’re
going home with daddy, okay?”

Grabbing the bags the children brought out with his free hand that wasn’t holding onto Avery,
Negan gave Y/N a long once over before nodding. Heading for the elevator, Negan made sure to
get the children on the elevator before leaving himself.

Staring down at Shane who glared up at her, she didn’t even know how to respond to everything.
Shaking her head, she moved back into the house and saw one of the bags that belonged to the
children still sitting in the doorway of the room she had for them. Going to grab it, she headed out
of the apartment to see that Shane was finally pulling himself up.

“I’m going to bed,” Shane announced when she hit the button for the elevator. His glare told her
that he didn’t like the way that she reacted to things, but he didn’t even apologize to her about
everything he had done.

“You’re sleeping on the couch,” she informed him once the elevators opened making him scoff. It
seemed like he was about to bicker with her but she hit the close doors button before he had a
chance to. Once she got off the elevator, she moved through the parking garage and saw that
Negan was finishing up getting the children into the SUV.

“We can’t just leave her here dad,” NJ bickered with his father, looking up at him with his hazel
eyes. “Don’t you want to save her and protect her from that man?”

“You know I want to protect your mother more than anything NJ. Other than you guys, your
mother means everything to me,” Negan lowered down with a sigh making her hide behind one of
the cement columns so she could listen to them together. “I tried NJ. I don’t know what more I can
do. Your mother doesn’t want to be with me. I can’t force her to be.”

“We should be able to do something though,” NJ countered making Negan sigh before leaning
forward to press a kiss over NJ’s temple. Stroking his fingers through NJ’s hair made their son
frown and Negan let out an upset breath. “I know I haven’t been happy with her, but I don’t want
that guy to hurt her dad. I still love her.”

“I love her too buddy,” Negan stated making her let out a long sigh feeling her chest tightening. “I
wish I could change things, but I’ve tried. I don’t know what I can do, but all we can hope for is
that she’s okay. That’s all that matters, right?”

“I feel like there should be something more that we can do,” NJ insisted but when Negan gave him
an expression, NJ let out a defeated breath. Giving Negan one final hug, NJ got up and moved to
the SUV to get into his side of the car.

Knowing that Negan was going to be headed to leave, she cleared her throat and stepped out
making Negan gaze back over his shoulder at her. Holding out the bag that they left, she had a hard
time looking at Negan after everything. When he reached for the bag, his fingers brushed against
hers making her sigh.

“They forgot that one,” she pushed her hands into her pockets feeling bad after this whole thing.
“Please be careful driving home.”

“I will,” Negan gave her a nod, the vein at the side of his neck bulging. When he went to turn on
his heel, he stopped and looked back over his shoulder at her. “Are you going to be okay?”
“Don’t worry about it,” she waved her hand in the air knowing that she hadn’t been okay in a very
long time. “Just be careful and take care of them.”

“I’m going to worry about it Y/N,” Negan frowned turning back to face her, his thick eyebrows full
of emotion. “I love you. I’m always going to love you so worrying about you is just going to come
naturally at this point.”

“You need to learn to stop doing that. Doing that is only going to make you miserable,” she slurred,
stepping back and away from Negan knowing that she was having so many thoughts right now but
she could tell that Negan was genuinely worried about her. “I’m not your responsibility. You
should be happy Negan and with me, I don’t think you’re ever going to have that.”

“Then you don’t know me like I thought you did,” Negan replied letting out a long exhale when
she stepped back and headed for the apartment building. “Come home with us Y/N.”

“I can’t Negan,” she stopped at the doors and shook her head. “We’re beyond that at this point. I
know that now. Especially after today. Have a good night, Negan.”

Leaving Negan and the kids actually hurt tonight. Especially with the way that Negan was looking
at her when she made her way back into the building. Heading back upstairs, Y/N took notice of
how Shane was already asleep on the couch with a bag of ice over his face from where Negan had
beaten the snot out of him. Shaking her head, she went back to the bedroom to get ready for bed.

Once she laid down, it took a very long time for her to even fall asleep. Her brain was going
through so many thoughts and emotions that she didn’t even know if she was healthy enough to
comprehend them right now. One thing she knew for sure was what happened tonight could never
happen again. When she finally did fall asleep, it wasn’t for very long because the sound of the
front door being slammed was heard making her eyes flutter to an open.

Staring out at the pillow beside her, she sighed when she saw that it was bare. Even though she had
expressed a distaste for the notes and the flowers that she was receiving every morning from
Negan, she grew to miss it. Sighing, she pulled herself up out of bed and headed toward the kitchen
to see Shane standing at the counter using his phone to look at his face after his fight with Negan.

“Hey, I got you something,” Shane nodded toward the cup of coffee and bag of something he had
picked up from the local chain that was close to her apartment.

Taking a seat at the counter on one of her stools she sighed and watched Shane push the food out to
her in front of her. Thinking about her life before all of this, she bit down on her bottom lip and
shook her head, “You know every morning when I was with Negan, he used to cook me these
ridiculous over the top breakfasts. For all of us really.”

“I’m not Negan,” Shane reminded her with a confused expression, his Adam’s apple bouncing in
his throat. Rubbing at the back of his neck, Shane leaned back against the counter opposite of the
island she was sitting at.

“No kidding,” she commented reaching for the coffee to take a sip of it knowing that the coffee at
home with Negan was even better. Shaking her head, she sighed and looked to Shane with a blank
gaze. “I’m going for a ride today. While I’m gone, I want you to get your things out of here. You’re
not welcome here anymore. By the time I get home tonight I expect everything that’s yours to be
gone. Including you.”

“Excuse me?” Shane snorted with a half smirk, his brown eyes narrowing as he stepped forward to
brace his hands over the top of the counter on the island. “You’re joking, right?”
“Does it look like I’m joking?” her stare was deadpan while she clung to the coffee he got for her.
Shane was stammering to say something when she stood up from where she was seated. “I don’t
care how stressed my family may have made me. You have no right to put your hands on my
children. Ever. Hitting me, even though I’m sure you’ll wave it off as a mistake last night—maybe
I could have excused that. But then again not really. In all my time being married to Negan he
never once hit me. We may have bickered, but not once did Negan hit me. If anything I was the
more aggressive of the two. But when you touched my son, no matter the reasoning…I never want
to see your face again. I made a lot of mistakes. More so recently, but the biggest one I made was
you. So get the hell out of my house.”

“Hey,” Shane tried to follow her toward her bedroom while she gathered some things for herself
that she would need for her drive. “I get that things were emotional last night, but I was just trying
to defend you.”

“I don’t need defending because I’m the one that was wrong!” she screamed at Shane, turning on
her heel to stare out at the man she brought into her life when she was at her worst. “I’m a shitty
mom, Shane. I said horrible things to NJ. Things I can never make up for but putting your hands on
him…you’re lucky I don’t sue you for it and take you for everything you have. Because you know
I could. I could make you lose your job. I can make sure that no one ever hires you again Shane
Walsh. So before you piss me off any further, get the fuck out of my apartment and never show
your face again.”

“Wow,” Shane scoffed with a tense smirk, his head nodding slowly. “Yes ma’am.”

With a final glare, Shane moved toward the closet to grab a bag for him to start packing his things.
Even though she was a lot of things Shane knew that she wasn’t fucking around. If she wanted to,
she was capable of ruining his life easily. Even though she knew it was too late when it came to
kicking Shane out of her life, she knew it was the right choice to no longer have him there because
he was just a poison in her life that needed to be gone. And he needed to be gone now.

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