HAROLD

AND THE
PURPLE CRAYON

Written by

Michael Tolkin

Revisions by
David 0. Russell

August 23. 1996 Draft

 EXT. SPACE - NIGHT

The black void of space is in front of us and as we

race
forward the credits beam. Space is deep and mysterious, but
enlivened by the sound of a TOY PIANO playing an intense
version of “SMOKE ON THE WATER” by Deep Purple: plink,
plink,
pinkkk--- plink, plink, plink—plinkkkk---plink, plink,
plink
--plunk--plunkkk, and on. Here comes Mars... the long canals
stretching across the arid plains of the red planet...
here
comes the asteroids... Here’s the moon, cold and gray,
and
there’s Earth, towards the North Pole... what’s that...
a
string connecting the North Pole to.. the ceiling of a
.

classroom?

2 INT. CLASSROOM NIGHT

-

2
Pan down from the Rand McNally beach ball Earth hanging from
the ceiling, to see that its Parents Night at Hawthorne
Elementary Schoot with parents standing around the perime
ter
of the classroom as kids line up at the front in their PLANET
and SPACEMAN COSTUMES for the play. There is one boy staring
up at the planets. We’ll come back to him in a moment.

Continue to pan down to AN ALL-AMERICAN GIRL, dressed as an

astronaut, PLAYING the HEAT METAL intro to “Smoke on the
Water” on the toy piano.

CUT TO:
3 PARENTS
3
Pan of THE PARENTS WATCHING, amused, as we come to WARREN and
SONIA, thirtyish, parents of Harold.

CUT TO:
4 THE TEACHER
4
The teacher, LIEBENGUTHE (PRONOUNCED LEE-BEN-GOOTH), A
.

FAT COLORFUL MAN with a RED WORRIED FACE AND A COAT AND TIE,
GENTLY PUSHES FORWARD A STRAIGHT-LOOKING, ALL AMERICAN
KID
DRESSED AS A RED PLANET --

STRAIGHT KID
Welcome, parents. I am Mars, the red
planet and, urn, I am Mars, the red planet
and, urn, no one has ever visited me, so I
am ver’ excited about the NASA astronauts
who will soon be on their way. Would you
like to meet the crew?

(CONTINUED)
C
 2.
4 CONTINUED:
4

PARENTS
YES

He steps back proudly. AN ALL-AMERICAN looking GIRL STEPS

FORWARD:

ALL-AMERICAN GIRL
I’m commander Alison Kramer, I’m 30
years
old and I’m from Canton, Ohio. And I’ve
loved space ever since I wasa litt
le
girl. My specialty is flight operations.

AS ANOTHER ALL-AMERICAN BOY STEPS FORW

ARD TO SPEAK, the
camera PANS TO: a GROUP OF THREE MIS
FITS ON THE SIDE, dressed
in thick, bulging layers of CRUMPLED
BROWN PAPER BAGS AND OLD
NEWSPAPERS.

They are:

-RUTH, a short girl with HUGE FRIZZY HAIR

and thick glasses.
-LEO, a skinny black kid with two front teet
h missing.
-JASON, a TALL, PLUMP, ROUND BOY eating peanut M & M’s.
--NEXT TO TH IS --

-- A BALD-HEADED BOY, dressed as SOME

THING in WHITE, whose
back is turned as he draws on BIG
WHITE PAPER taped to the
wall --

-- MEANWHILE THE ALL-AMERICAN KID

DRONES ON --

ALL-AMERICAN #2
I’m first officer Pierre Renard.
I’m 45,
and I was born in Paris, which is
in a
country called France. My speciality is
navigation so I will guide us to
Mars.
Let me introduce you to--

THE THREE MISFITS WEARING CRUMPLED

PAPER BAGS SUDDENLY SWA
AROUND ALL-AMERICAN #2, WHO HOLD
S a MODEL OF A SPACE SHIP On
a tall pole, which he moves towards
the globe.

RUTH
We’re asteroids --

LEO
Yeah, we’re asteroids -—

(CONTINUED)
 3.
4 CONTINUED: (2)
4

JASON
An asteroid storm --

ALL-AMERICAN #2
Not yet!

LEO
Crashing --

ALL-AMERICAN #2
I said not yet!

THE OTHER ALL-AMERICAN KIDS LOOK ANGRY

ALL-AMERICAN *1
Stupid idiots.

ALL-AMERICAN GIRL
Retards----

RUTH
Crashing into the space ship --

JASON
Crashing around it --

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
Not yet.

JASON pulls LEO and RUTH back. They stand in their crumpled
(,. outfits, looking chastised. RUTH SNEEZES and rubs her nose,
while Leo yawns. Jason resumes eating his peanut M & M’s.

ALL-AMERICAN *2
(HOLDING POLE UP)
Let me introduce you to the high res
the high res-, the camera that. will
record our adventure --

Harold is oblivious, drawing away.

LEO
(whispers)
Harold --

WHIP PAN TO:

5 WARREN AND SONIA
5
anxiously waiting.

WHIP PAN BACK TO:

0
 4.

6 HAROLD
6
who glances at the crowd over his shoulder.
WE CAN NOW SEE
HE IS DRESSED AS A CAMERA, WITH A LENS STRAPPED
TO THE TOP OF
HIS HEAD.

ALL-AMERICAN #1
(whispers)
Go stupid.

RUTH
Go ahead, Harold.

HAROLD quietly refers to his drawings as he speaks

--

HAROLD
(VERY QUIET)
The rocket is waiting to take off from
Florida --

PEOPLE CAN BARELY HEAR HIM MtJRMURING.

CUT BACK TO:

7 WARREN AND SONIA
7
They strain to hear Harold.

CUT BACK TO:

C 8 HAROLD
8
He walks back to his FIRST DRAWING of the rock
et on the
launch pad.

HE SPEAKS VERY SOFTLY.

HAROLD
(WALKING)
This is what we’ll see as the rocket
takes off clouds, then stars, then
--

asteroids --

HAROLD
(walking; growing excited)
The astronauts sleep inside --

(pointing at Commander Kranier

asleep)
and this little line was a mistake, so I
made it a moose, the moose was very
hungry, so I made him a pie --

(CONTINUED)
 5.
8 CONTINUED: 8

People are laughing, SONIA SMILES, WARREN LOOKS WORRIED.

Oblivious to their reactions, Harold gets MORE EXCITED, AND
LOUDER, as he delves into his drawings --

HAROLD
(walking)
And then the moose was lonely so I made
him a little porcupine --

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
Thank you, Harold.

HAROLD
(WALKING AND DRAWING)
The moose and the porcupine have to watch
out for the spaceship. See, it has a
satellite dish on top to talk to us back
- on Earth just like the moose antlers.
V (he dws an antler-like
satellite dish)

AN ANGRY-LOOKING ALL AMERICAN BOY LOOKS AGITATED.

RAYMOND
IT’S MY TURK NOW. HE’S WRECKING IT --

NOW THE SOUND FADES OUT EXCEPT FOR HAROLD’S VOICE AND HIS
WAXY CRAYON MARKING --

HAROLD
(WALKING AND DRAWING)
The spaceship will orbit Mars like this,
around and around, and the people inside
will wake up and get ready to land --

Harold draws WILD, EXCITED, BIG PURPLE LOOPS around MARS.

RAYMOND’ S ANGRY
FATHER
(we can’t hear him)
It’s my son’s turn to go now --

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
(we can’t hear him)
HAROLD! PLEASE STOP NOW!

HAROLD
WHAM, :he landing module TAXES OFF really
fast --

HAROLD RUNS DOWN THE WALL MAKING A BIG PURPLE LINE with his
crayon, parents clear the way for him WARREN AND SONIA
--

LOOK WORRIED AS THEY MOVE SO HE CAN GO BY --

(CONTINUED)
 5.
8 CONTINUED: (2) 8

WARREN
(Feebly as Harold oasses)
Harold?

( LEO, RUTH, AND JASON are the only ones SMILING happily as
HAROLD DRAWS HIS LINE OFF THE PAPER, ONTO THE WALL AND ALL
THE WAY OUT TO THE HALL.

HAROLD
(EXCITED) —

It gets to Mars and maybe there’s a

Martian to say hello, but probably not,
but maybe, and he might have ten arms
like this and now the astronauts are
really, really HAPPY to shake his ten
hands

HAROLD suddenly STOPS AND LOOKS BACK into the classroom,

where everyone is looking at him. IT IS SILENT FOR A MOMENT-

Then chaos breaks loose.

RAYMOND
(SOBBING)
It was my turn to talk about the rocks!

RAYMOND’ S ANGRY
FATHER
Why don’t you learn how to control your
kid, for God’s sake?

WARREN and SONIA look back, SPEECHLESS, a bit STUNNED.

LITTLE GIRL
(crying)
I want to go home.

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
Everybody calm down, please!

CUT TO:
9 SIDEWALK OUTSIDE THE SCHOOL NIGHT RAINING
- -
9
MR. LIEBENGUTHE walks FAST alongside WARREN AND SONIA;
Warren holds a bewildered-looking Harold in his arms.

SONIA
(walking fast)
He’s so quiet most of the time --

I’\’
 7.
9 CONTINUED:
9
MR. LIEBENGUTHE
Extremely quiet --

WARREN
(walking fast)
We were very surprised --

SONIA
(walking fast)
Pleasantly surprised --

WARREN
---he was able to talk in front
of so many
people --

SONIA
Not that we don’t understand why
it
caused a problem.

WARREN
Because he has a very rich ima
gination --

SONIA
Extremely rich imagination.

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
(walking fast)
Some people might say it’s Att
ention
Deficit Disorder and prescribe
Ritilin
(J.
--

WARREN AND SONIA

(stop at their car)
What?!

WARREN COVERS HAROLD’S EARS AS

HE HASTILY PUTS HIM INTO THE
CAR SEAT IN BACK AND CLOSES THE
DOOR so he will not hear
anymore.

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
Personally, I’d point to emo
tional
problems originating in the hom
e --

S ON IA
(upset)
What are you talking about?

WARREN
(slightly panicked)
He’s very creative, that’s all
, what do
you think Van Gogh was like
in school?
Probably very moody, grabbing
kids ears
and what not

(CONTINUED)
 8.
9 CONTINUED: (2)
9

. LIEBENGUTHE
Is there something happening in the
family that I ought to know about? Is
your marriage in some kind of trouble?

WARREN
(gets in teacher’s face)
You’ve got a lot of nerve, buddy --

NR. LIEBENGUTHE -

Only looking for solutions, we’re all on

the same team here, and we’re in it to
win it.
(suddenly forces a smile)
Maybe we could schedule a time to talk
next week, OK?

SMASH CUT TO:

10 SEDAN
10
LOW ANGLE: SEDAN SPLASHES THROUGH A PUDDLE as it turns
corner. a

CUT TO:
INT. CAR - NIGHT
11
Warren drives in silence. Sofia looks straight ahead.

C Harold sits in the back.

SONIA turns the radio on, a news station. On the news:

NEWS ANNOUNCER
(V.0.)
All systems are go for the launch
tomorrow of the first ever mission to
Mars.

She turns it up.

NEWS ANNOUNCER
(cont; V.0.)
The international team of astronauts is
in final preparation for the nine month
journey from the third to the fourth
planet from the sun. Flight commander
Alison Kramer, interviewed today,
expressed great confidence.

(CONTINUED)
 C

11 CONTINUED:
11

COI!ANDER KRAR
(V.0.)
We’re teeling a little nervous, of
course, excited, proud to be a part of
history in the making --

Warren turns the radio off.

HAROLD
What’s Ritilin?

SONIA
It’s a drug they give to hyperactive
children.

WARREN
But you don’t need i.

SON-IA
That teacher didn’t know what. he was
talking about.

HAROLD
Why did you say drawing is bad?

WARREN
I didn’t say drawing is bad. Did I say
that?

SONIA
C. If I were Harold,
sound to me.
that’s how it would

WARREN
Come on, Sofia, look --

SONIA
You have to be careful what you say when
you’re upset --

WARREN
Now I’m the only one who’s upset, is that
it?

SONIA
You said he was different --

WARREN
It’s fine to be different --

CUT TO:

C
 10.

12 HAROLD
12
Harold stares out the window, eyeb
rows raised, EATING STALKS
OF BROCCOLI FROM A SANDWICH BAG
GIE.

CUT BACK TO:

13 WARREN AND SONIA
13
WARREN
-—all I’m saying is, it’s great
to be
talented, it’s great to be an art
ist, but
you have to be considerate of the
people
around you --

SONIA
Yes, you have to be considerate
of other
people --

WARREN
Aware of the people around you
--

SONIA
Aware of them, yes, that would be
good.
But sometimes if you have an insp
iration-
WARREN
And inspiration is great --

SONIA
Inspiration is excellent --

WARREN
So we agree about inspiration.

SONIA
Yes.

WARREN
But what was I going to say?

SONIA
That you can have inspiration
, but you’ve
got to try to be aware --

WARREN
--of the people around you, exactly.

CUT TO:

C
 11.

14 HAROLD
14
Harold’s eyebrows press down with consternation.
He puts
another stalk of broccoli into mouth.

CUT BACK TO:

15 WARREN AND SONIA
15
WARREN
There’s room on the agenda for awareness-

The audio of his parent’s bickering starts bleeding

into the
background as we move in on Harold. He has tuned them out.

SONIA
And consideration --

WARREN
Nobody’s the center of the universe --

SONIA
Warren.

WARREN
He’s not. Nobody is. How do you think
the phone company would work if we all
thought we were the center of the
universe? I’ll tell you how it would
work, there wouldn’t even be a dial tone,
that’s how it would work.

The car turns a corner and the moon light hits Harold
’s
paper. He looks up at the moon, his face still in a grimace.
This is not the moon you and I see, the Man in the Moon
has a
real face, and he is smiling. Harold almost smiles back, but
instead opens his mouth, and the moon opens its mouth
.
Harold makes a crazy angry face, and the moon makes
a crazy
angry face back. We look down at Harold as he smiles, from
teh MOON’S POV.

We watch the car drive away, the little boy looking up at the
moon.

DISOVLE FROM THE MOON TO:

16 INT. HAROLD’S HOUSE KITCHEN NIGHT
-
16
Harold sits alone in the kitchen with an untouched puddin
g.
His parents joins him. Harold is in his pajamas. His pad
and crayons are next to him, ALSO UNTOUCHED.

(CONTINUED)
C
 12.
16 CONTINUED:
16
Warren’s clip-on tie is haif-un
clipped, and hanging to one
side. THE RADIO PLAYS a slow number by COUNT BASIE
sit quietly at the table scrapin as they
g their bowls clean with the
clinking of spoons on china.

SONIA
Don’t you want your pudding, Haro
ld?
He shakes his head slowly.

SONIA
(continuing)
Oh, honey.

She looks at him.

WARREN
It’ll blow over, Harold, don’t worr
y.
Once I jammed a circuit board that
stopped phone service in eight
quadrants
- man, was I embarrassed. But people
forgot about it.

SONIA
Eventually.

WARREN
Your drawings were beautiful.

SONIA
They were wonderful. But sometimes it’s
not easy to be the artist, hone
y.
HAROLD
I’m not going to be an artist.
I’m riot
going to draw anymore.

SONIA
Of course you will.

HAROLD
No, I won’t.

WARREN
Harold.

He shakes his head stubbornly.

WARREN
(continuing)
Then what are you going to be,
pal?

(CONTINUED)
C’
 13.
16 CONTINUED: (2)
16

HAROLD
A bird.

WARREN
I wont be able to get you a job with me
at the telephone company if you’re a
bird.

SONIA
He could be the bird sittingon the wire.

WARREN
They’re not in the union, babe.

HAROLD
Then I’ll be a plate.

WARREN
My son the p-late. OK.

S ON IA
What is that supposed to mean?

WARREN
He said it, not me.

Warren starts to eat Harold’s pudding.

SONIA
Did you ask if you could eat his pudding?
O
—
WARREN
(eating)
Don’t start taking this out on me, Sonia.
He’s obviously too sad to eat his
pudding.

SONIA
That’s no excuse -—

WARREN
(EATING)
I’m just saying-- waste not, want not.
A moment of silence passes when the only
sound is Warren
eating Harold’s pudding.

Then a piece of Spanish orchestral music comes

on the radio.
HAROLD looks up, CURIOUS.

(CONTINUED)
C
 14.
16 CONTINtJED: (3)
16

S ON IA
(stroking Harold’s head)
You like that music, honey?

HAROLD
What is it?

SONIA
That’s Spanish music.

HAROLD
From Spain?

WARREN
Or Mexico.

SONIA
They use it at bulifights.

HAROLD
What’s a bullfight?

WARREN
(switches to Spanish accent)
Oh, the matador fights the bull in the
ring, Harold, it’s very exciting --

Warren STANDS AND FLOURISHES the kitchen towel like

a
matador’s cape.

(J SONIA STANDS.

WARREN
Toro, toro.

She RUNS AT HIS CAPE.

WARREN
(continuing)
What was that?

SONIA
That was a bull.

WARREN
You’re not going to cheer Harold up with
a lame bull like that.

SONIA
Your matador isn’t so hot, either.
She pretends she’s a bull, putting her fingers on
her head
for HOFNS, stamping the kitchen floor and SNOR
TING.

(CONTINUED)
C
 15.
16 CONTINUED: (4) 16

Harold WATCHES, slightly BENUSED as his parents try to cheer

him up.

WARREN
(continuing; waving the cape
at Sofia; but he drops the
accent now)
OK, baby, come and get it from Papa --

SONIA SNORTS AND STANPS MENACINGLY. Haold looks bemused.

WARREN
(continuing; backing up with
the cape)
Hit me with your best shot --

She charges again, and again, and again, as Warren whips and
FLOURISHES THE CAPE again and again --

WARREN
(continuing)
Ole, putty in my hands --

-- until they are unaware of where they are and she CHARGES
HER HEAD DIRECTLY INTO THE REFRIGERATOR.

S ON IA
(GRABS THE TOP OF HER HEAD)

c OWW, damnit.

WARREN BURSTS OUT LAUGHING.

watches.
HAROLD LOOKS CONFUSED as he

WARREN
Are you OK, honey?

She TAKES THE ICE TRAY FROM THE FREEZER.

SONIA
It hurts.

WARREN
(posing as a matador for
Harold; in Spanish accent)
Maybe you could draw the matador.
Ole por favor.

Harold is reluctant.

Sonia PUTS THE ENTIRE ICE TRAY ON TOP OF HER HEAD.

The telephone rings. Sofia answers it, holding the ice tray
on her head.

(CONTINUED)
 16.
16 CONTINUED: (5) 16

SONIA
(holds ice tray on head;
continuing)
Hello?.. .Speaking. Uh-huh. OK...
(Suddenly she looks NERVOUS)

WARREN
Please, señor, draw my portrait.

Sofia WAVES at WARREN TO HUSH UP. Hardld starts to draw.

SONIA
(holds ice tray on head)
SSHHHHH!
(into phone)
Are they sure? OK. Thank you, I’ll call
Dr. Krimstein tomorrow. Thanks.

WARREN, still posing for Harold, LOOKS AT HER. She looks at

him.

WARREN
Dr. Krimstein?

SONIA LOOKS LIKE SHE’S ABOUT TO BURST with HAPPINESS.

WARREN
(continuing)
Oh, my God! We’re gonna have a --

C (holds a finger to her lips)

SHHHH!

She HOLDS A FINGER TO HER LIPS and looks at Harold, who is

drawing.

SONIA
(whispers)
Let’s wait until tomorrow.

WARREN
Right it’s been a rough night.

Warren starts smooching Sonia’s cheek.

S ON IA
I’m glad to see you’re drawing again,
Harold.

(CONTINUED)
 17.
16 CONTINUED: (6)
16

WARREN
Let’s see the picture.

HAROLD
The matador.

WARREN
Terrific. Let me see.

Warren looks puzzled.

WARREN
(continuing; puzzled)
Very good.

THE DRAWING: Harold has drawn a PICTURE

OF WARREN (in his
dangling clip—on tie) acting like a mata
dor.

WARREN
You know, a matador doesn’t dress
like
me, Harold.

HAROLD
He doesn’t?

WARREN PICKS UP A MAGIC MARKER and bring

s it down to the
paper.

WARREN

C: No, in real life, a matador has a

hat and a bigger cape, and
...
--
funny

CUT TO:
17 CLOSE UP OF PAPER
17
The marker squeaks across the pape
r.

WARREN
(continuing; talking as he
draws)
Tight pants that show off his litt
le
fanny or all the pretty señorit
as, and-
A matador holds his arms up like
this.
And he adds additional limbs. The drawing now has four arms
and four legs and is a monstrosit
y. Harold looks crushed.

WARREN
(continuing)
Uh-oh, what happened?

(CONTINUED)
C
 18.
17 CONTINUED:
17

S ON IA
(winces in pain)
Warren

WARREN
(winces in pain)
Oh, righttt --

SONIA
You can’t draw on his drawins -

WARREN
(winces in pain)
I’m sorry, Harold, I’m an idiot. Here:
you can write idiot on my butt right now—

Warren bends over for Harold.

HAROLD GETS UP WITH HIS PAl) AND CRAYONS, his face burning.
Warren tries to EMBRACE HIM.

WARREN
It’s been a hard day, hasn’t it?
Harold WRIGGLES free from Warren’s arms.
Sofia tries to
embrace HAROLD, but he PUSHES HER OFF as he
leaves.

HAROLD
(runs out)
Leave me alone.

Warren starts to follow, but Sofia stops him.

S ON IA
Let him cool down. Sometimes he needs to
be alone.

Warren looks upset as he watches Haro

ld go.
18 INT. HAROLD’S BEDROOM NIGHT
18
-

Harold bursts into his dark room and throw

s his crayons
angrily out the window. He stands and watches them roll off
the almost-flat roof one by one. Except for the purple,
which rolls back a bit from the edge and
stops in a pool of
dappled moonlight. He looks up at the moon and squints and
the moon’s face comes into focus as it
looks down upon the
crayon. Harold looks at the moon cruestioningly
. The moon
smiles. Harold shakes his head. The moon nods, “Yes”.
Harold grits his teeth and exhales as if
to say, “OK, I’ll
try it.” Harold climbs out the window and pick
s up the
crayon. He goes back inside, grabs his pad and
drops to the
floor.

CUT TO:

C:
 19.

19 HAROLD’S EYES
19
HAROLD’S EYES, flashing with anger -- as he starts to
scribble violently --

CUT TO:
20 HAROLD
20
HE TEARS a page off and does it again tears that page off
and scribbles more violently until he suddenly
looks dismayed
as we hear the crayon drop and hit the rung
s of a metal
ladder: plunk, plunk, plunk.

CUT TO:
21 THE PAGE
21
The crayon falls into-h-is 3-D scribble
as if into a crazy
--

funnel. Plink it hits another purple line and plop

--

drops to the white ground beneath, rolling a littl

--

e and
stopping.

CUT TO:
22 HAROLD
22
Harold stares intensely. He leans forward.

C 23 SCRIBBLE
CUT TO:

23
Push in to the scribble: Harold’s ANIMATED HAND reaches in
from the side and grabs the crayon. Pull out to see the
ANIMATED HAROLD holding a crayon on a whit
e background. He
looks up above his head
--
-- and sees the 3-D spiral of
scribble rising above him.

THE MOOSE WALKS PAST HIM, eating the scrib

ble as he goes,
followed by the little PORCUPINE.

Harold looks BEMUSED as they pass.

Now he draws a sliver of MOON above him, then

a line as he
walks. He stands on the line, a shadow drops,
and it’s a
TIGHTROPE. He draws a POLE at one end of the tightrope
. He
dances a bit on the tightrope, then draws
himself an
UIRELLA, which SNAPS open. HE HEARS: CHAKATA, CHAKATA,
CHAKATA and LOOKS UP, DISMAYED, at the other end of
--

the
tightrope.

PAN TO:

C
 20.

24 THE MATADOR
24
THE MATADOR, a cubist Picasso of Warrens
drawing on top of
Harold’s drawing, is CL.AMEERING UP THE POLE
at the end of the
tightrope, and stands on top of the POLE.

MATADOR
Seflor. Thees look dangerous to me, you
know what I mean? But don’t panic, stay
calm --

HAROLD TURNS AND STARTS WALKING AWAY FROM

THE MATADOR.

MATADOR
(continuing)
I’ll get you down safely, don’t you
worry-

HAROLD LEAVES MATADOR IN THE DISTANCE, and

DRAWS AN ---

ELEPHANT, which stands on the opposite pole

. He places the
umbrella into the elephant’s trunk, AND THE
ELEPHANT STEPS
ONTO THE TIGHTROPE --

PLUNGING IT DOWN, OUT OF FRAME --

TO THE GROUND, WHERE MATADOR RUNS UP, FOUR ARMS AKIMEO --

MATADOR
(continuing)
ç Gracias a diés, I am here --

MATADOR CAREFULLY GETS ONTO THE TIGHTROPE

AND PLACES HAROLD
ONTO THE GROUND. THE ELEPHANT STEPS OFF THE ROPE --

SLING—SHOTTING THE MATADOR INTO THE AIR.

AS THE ELEPHANT ALES OFF, HAROLD DRAWS A SMALL TANK OF

WATER.

THE MATADOR LANDS, with a crash of metal

and springs, NEXT TO
THE LITTLE ROUND TANK. HE IS SQUASHED INTO A WRECK.

MATADOR
(continuing; squashed voice)
I theenk I pulled something in my neck
.
Suddenly -- the Matador springs back to his full heig
ht
much taller than Harold, who falls over --

backwards trying to
move away, AS MATADOR SNAPS OPEN HIS CAPE
.

(CONTINUED)
 21.
24 CONTINUED:
24

MATADOR
(continuing)
Draw me a bull, señor, quickly, the
public waits --

MATADOR LOOKS SHOCKED WHEN HE SEE

S HAROLD IS DRAWING A
SCRATCHY, IRRITABLE-LOOKING LION
.

MATADOR
(continuing)
Excüsaine, there ees no lion on the
agenda
for today --

HAROLD
(annoyed)
What’s your agenda?

MATADOR
To be a hero and fight thee bull, of
course, so be a good boy and draw
me a
bull, please. No lion. A bull.
The lion COMES TO LIFE and OPENS
HIS TOOTHY JAWS WIDE AND
SNAPS THEM SHUT as he tries to bite
the MATADOR, who RUNS.

MATADOR
(CONTINUING)
Ayddaine, hijo mio, rápido!
WHILE MATADOR IS CHASED BY THE LION
,
HAROLD HAS OCCUPIED HIMSELF WITH
DRAWING A SERIES OF SMALL
PORCUPINES. He looks up, sees Matador chased
distance. in the

SO HAROLD BEGINS TO DRAW A CAGE,

enclosing the LION.

MATADOR
(continuing)
A caging device, very clever, señ
or.
Let’s draw to a rhythm to move
more
efficiently bar, bar, bar, bar
--
--

HE CLAPS HIS HAND AS HAROLD DRAW

S BARS ON THE CAGE.

MATADOR
(continuing)
I theenk your tempo is off. Let me see
the crayon, por favor.

HAROLD IGNORES HIM, FINISHES THE

CAGE, BUT HAS DRAWN HIMSELF
INTO THE CAGE WITH THE LION.

(Th (CONTINUED)
 22.
24 CONTINUED: (2)
24

MATADOR
(continuing)
Santa Maria de Avila.

Harold turns siowiy and sees the LION

GRINNING AT HIM.
THE LION COMES LUMEERING TOWARD HAROLD,
who backs into the
bars, terrified.

BUT A LITTLE PORCUPINE HAS RIDDEN HIS TINY

UNICYCLE INTO THE
CAGE, and THE LION STEPS ON IT.

THE LION ROARS IN PAIN LIKE A BABY, holding up his toot with
the porcupine stuck into it.

HAROLD NOW DRAWS LINES OVER HIS FACE AND

PAJAMAS, EXTENDING
THE BARS OVER HIMSELF, SO THAT HE IS NOW
OUTSIDE the cage.

MATADOR
(continuing)
Excelente, my friend --

MATADOR SPITS INTO HIS HANDS AND STARTS

TO WIPE THE PURPLE
LINES OFF HAROLD’S FACE, SMUDGING THE PURP
LE ALL OVER HIM.

MATADOR
(continuing)
Now, por favor, my bull, with big horns,
a ring through the nose --

HE SEES HAROLD HAS DRAWN A PLUCKING SCISS

OR DEVICE AND IS
REACHING THROUGH THE EARS TO PLUCK THE
PORCUPINES FROM THE
LION’S FOOT.

MATADOR
(continuing)
He is not worth it, my friend, come on,
we are way behind schedule --

LION
(RASPY OLD VOICE)
Why don’ t you shut up?

MATADOR
Watch your tongue, kitty, or you will
taste the fury of my blade --

HE POINTS HIS SWORD THROUGH THE EARS.

MATADOR NOW DOES A
SWORD DEXONSTRATION, SLICING THE AIR QUICK
LY AND DANCING
ABOUT.

(CONTINUED)
C
 23.
24 CONTINUED: (3) 24

MATADOR
(continuing)
I don’t hear you talking so tough now, do
I, my friend? I am auite certain I could
keeck your rear end ve easily.

MATADOR SLICES AROUND AND ACCIDENTALLY SLICES HIMSELF IN

TWO.
HE LOOKS SHOCKED AS HIS LEGS RUN AWAY.

HE MUST PUT HIS SECOND SET OF HANDS TO THE GROUND, CRAB-LIKE,

in order to stay up. LION LAUGHS. MATADOR POKES HIM IN THE
EYE WITH HIS SWORD. THE LION SWIPES AT HIM THROUGH THE BARS
and IS THEN BOOTED IN THE REAR BY MATADOR’S LEGS, which have
run inside the cage.

LION TAKES OFF AFTER MATADOR’S LEGS.

MATADOR
(continuing)
Hey! Leave my legs alone!

PAN UP TO:

HAROLD SWINGS BY OVERHEAD, hanging on the TRAPEZE FROM HIS

LEGS --

CUT TO:
25 LION
O THE LION LUNGES and PINS MATADOR’S running legs to the
25

ground.

MATADOR
(0.S.)
Büscame un cura, porcué voy a morir
ahorita --

SUDDENLY PURPLE ‘Z’s’ FALL AROUND THE LION FROM ABOVE, MAKING
HIM DROWSY.

PAN UP TO:
26 HAROLD 26
HAROLD SWINGING ON HIS TRAPEZE OVERHEAD, DRAWING Z’s THAT
FALL ONTO THE LION.

LION ROLLS ONTO HIS BACK, and fails asleep, MULING in his
raspy, scratchy voice.

(CONTINUED)
 24.
26 CONTINUED: 26

LION
(FALLING ASLEEP)
Man, I’m really, ya know, p.o. d, but I’m
C sleepy right now, so, awright,
just sayin’ --
but I’m

MATADOR
Get down from that dangerous perch
imrnediatamente, mi hijo.

MATADOR FALLS ASLEEP WHILE HAROLD RAINS ‘Z’s’ on him as well.

MATADOR
(FALLING ASLEEP)
Es . . .muy. . peligroso.
.

HAROLD SLIPS OFF THE TRAPEZE AND IS FALLING, WHEN HE DRAWS A

LINE TO CATCH HIMSELF. He lands smoothly on the ground.

HE LOOKS DROWSY HIMSELF AS HE STRETCHES AND YAWNS, draws the

moon, then his familiar WINDOW AROUND THE MOON, then his bed,
which he gets in and goes to sleep. He still has purple
smudges on his face.

CUT TO:

27 INT. HAROLD’S BEDROOM - MORNING 27

Harold, the purole smudeges still on his face, is still

asleep, as Sofia comes in.
(•
SONIA
Harold, wake up.

28 INT. DEN - DAY 28

CLOSE UP: TELEVISION, the Mars Mission on the launch pad,

live from Houston. Two announcers, Roger and Jane, keep up
the patter.

ROGER
(° r)
We’re holding at T minus sixty minutes.
The weather is looking awful spotty,
we’ve got light rain falling, and the
launch may be cancelled vet acain.

PULL BACK TO:

29 HAROLD 29

Hrold SITS ON THE SOFA with a bowl of cereal at his side,

watching the TV. HE GETS AN IDEA AND STARTS DRAWING on the
daily NEWSPAPER with his purple crayon.

(CONTINUED)
C:
 25.
29 CONTINUED: 29

S ON IA
(O.S.)
Looks like the rains gonna delay the
Mars Mission again.

CUT TO:

30 WARREN 3Q

WARREN
Meanwhile, the delay gives us a chance to
talk about something very, very exciting.

SONIA
It has nothing to do with school, or your
drawing.

CUT TO:

31 WARREN AND SONIA 31

WARREN and SONIA sit in chairs facing Harold. The TV is

visible between them, a few feet back, and THE CHATTER ABOUT
THE MISSION CONTINUES behind them.

WARREN
Do you remember when the phone rang last
night?

Harold nods, barely looking up.

C WARREN
It was Mom’s doctor.

HAROLD
Is Mommy sick?

SONIA
No, I’m fine. But I’m going to have a
baby.

Harold stares at them.

WARREN
A little brother or a little sister.

SONIA
Isn’t that great?

They wait, nopefully. But there is no reaction from Harold.

(CONTINUED)
 26.
31 CONTINUED:
31

S ON IA
(continuing)
I’m sorry, Harold, we need to ask you how
you feel about it?

WARREN
Right. So. How you feel about it?

HAROLD
OK.

Warren and Sofia look at each other APPREHEN

SIVELY.

SONIA
I guess you’ll just take your time
adjusting to the idea --

WARREN
You can take all the time you need.

SONIA
But we wanted you to know --

WARREN
We wanted you to know we’re having
another baby because ——

SONIA
--because we love you very, very much --

WARREN
--very much and we want you to have a
brother or sister to make your life more

SONIA
Full.

WARREN
Exactly, more full.

HAROLD
More full of what?

SONIA
More full of life.
--

WARREN
Yes! More full of life’.

He looks down at his crayon. His parents anticipate a

reaction. LONG PAUSE.
--

(CONTINUED)

C
 27.
31 CONTINUED: (2)
31

HAROLD
(without looking up)
Will I have to share my crayons?

SONIA
No, the baby will have his own crayons.
Or her own crayons.

WARREN
Wait a second. Sometimes yoJ’ll have to
share with the baby. But the baby will
share with you, too.

HAROLD
What can the baby share?

WARREN and SONIA look a bit stymied.

SONIA
A smile, a giggle.

Harold rolls his eyes. Long pause. Everyone looks at each

other awkwardly.

Warren opens a PAPERBACK titled, “OWING YOUR SPECI

ALLY
TALENTED CHILD” and starts thumbing through it QUICK
LY
perusing various pages.

SONIA
(MURMURS)
C- What’s it say?

WARREN
(MURMURS)
I don’t know.

He gets up and LEAVES. Warren PICKS UP the NEWSPAPER HAROLD

HAS LEFT ON THE SOFA, and sees that HAROLD HAS DRAWN
AN
URELLA OVER A PHOTO OF THE ROCKET on the LAUN
CH PAD, plus a
SHINING SUN ABOVE.

JANE
(on ‘IV)
What do you know, Roger, the sun has
defied all predictions and mysteriously
burst through the clouds. We may be
underway sooner than we thought.

ROGER
(on TV)
Much sooner. This is a real lucky break
for the mission, Jane.

(CONTINUED)
C
 28.
31 CONTINUED: (3) 31

WARREN’S HEAD SNAPS UP as he looks at the TV, then back at

the NEWSPAPER.

(J. I don’t think that went too badly, do

you?

WARREN turns the TV OFF.

WARREN
(distracted)
No, not too badly.

S ON IA
(watching the TV)
I hope things go all right at school.

WARREN
I’m sure hell be fine. The kids wont
even remember what happened last night.

CUT TO:
32 INT. SCHOOL - BACK OF CLASSROOM - DAY 32

RAYMOND
Re-tard, re-tard, retard, retard,
retard.

HAROLD IS WALKING, IGNORING RAYMOND, who is joined in his

Li taunting by a freckle-faced redheaded girl named BOBBI.

BOBBI
You drew all over the wall cuz you’re a
crazy re-tard -—

RAYMOND
Super crazy re—tard.

LEO
Harold is not a retard.

RUTH
His drawing was very original.

RAYMOND
You’re a retard, too.

RUTH
You’re retarded, you childish, mean, re
tard. You should never call anybody a
re- tard.

(CONTINUED)
 29.
32 CONTINUED: 32

LEO
Retards act like you, Raymond --

C. No,
JASON
they act like you --

RAYMOND AND BOEBI

You’re all retards.

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
(shouts)
That’s enough! I want every one of you
to line up right here --

They all line up against the wall.

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
Don’t you EVER talk about retarded
children 1-ike that, do you hear me? They
have rights like everybody else and they
deserve dignity and respect, is that
clear?

AWKWARD SILENCE as everyone looks at their feet.

BOBBI
Yes, Mr. Lieben-goober

They all suppress laughter which then spits forth

convulsively.
C MR. LIEBENGUTHE
Who said that?

They all remain silent.

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
(continuing)
What is my name?

RUTH
Mr. Liebenguthe.

RAYMOND
Goober

Mr. Liebenguthe TURNS SHARPLY TO RAYMOND, furious.

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
While you’re standing here horsing
around, those astronauts are preparing to
go into the black void of space for over
seven months. And they’re going to step
onto an unknown planet.
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
 30.
32 CONTINUED: (2)
32
MR. LIEBENGUTHE (conc’d)
(he leans into their faces)
Do you have any idea what
that’s like?

RUTH
Were missing the launch,
Mr.
Liebenguthe.

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
What?

He turns around to the TV tha

t’s in the front of the
classroom specially for the
launch, and all they see is
STREAM OF TEAILING ROCKET a
SMOKE ON THE SCREEN. The rocket
has left the frame.

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
(sadly)
I missed the launch...

JASON
I’m sure they’ll have it on
tape.

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
I wanted to see it LIVE, Jaso
n!
History’s not about tape,
it’s about
being there, come on! We all want the
LIVE experience, don’t we?

The kids make “he’s nuts”

signs to each other behind
Liebenguthe’s back, while Mr.
Mr. Liebenguthe and Harold
(, the rocket coverage on TV. stare at

CUT TO:
33 TV SCREEN
33
CLOSE UP: TV SCREEN; READ “TAPED EARLIER TODAY”
COMMANDER ALISON KRAMER disp
lays the INTERIOR OF THE
the people of the world. SHIP to
She stands in a row of special
sleep chambers, where all
of the astronauts are strappi
themselves into their bed ng
s, facing the camera, as mum
covers come down over eac my
h chamber.

COANDER KRAMER
(on TV)
We’re preparing for the long trip
Mars, to
so we’re goina into deep sle
about ep for
seven months. When we wake up,
we’ll be a few blocks from Mars.
As she speaks, the sleep chambers fill wit
h cold fog.

CUT TO:

C
 31.

34 INT. CLASSROOM DAY

34
-

The children are all RIVETED as they watch he TV

in silence.

ROGER
(O.S.; on TV)
Are you at all scared, Commander :Kramer?

CLOSE IN ON HAROLD, LISTENING INTENTLY, his eyes grow wide.

COIANDER KRAR
(O.S.; on TV)
Of course, we’re all afraid of what we
don’t know.

CUT TO:
35 COMMANDER KRANER
35
CLOSE UP OF COMMANDER KRAXER ON TV

COMMANDER KRAR
(ON TV)
But there comes a time when you have to
take a deep breath, strap yourself to the
rocket, and go!

Mr. Liebenguthe steps in front of the TV in a pumpe

d up state
of inspiration.

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
That’s right! Now let’s all learn about
the planets!

KIDS
(SHOUT IN UNISON)
YEAHHI

Harold looks wide-eyed and excited as he opens

his textbook
along with all the other kids. Mr. Liebenguthe nods
passionately as he inhales, red-faced, and paces
the front of
the classroom, loosening his tie.

CUT TO:
36 EXT. SCHOOL YARD DAY
-

36
CLOSE UP: RUTH HANGS UPSIDE DOWN on the jungle
gym, her big
frizzy hair hanging down and her glasses a bit out
of place.

(CONTINUED)
 32.
36 CONTINUED:
36

RUTH
What could be more thrilling than to go
into outer space?

CUT TO:
37 JASON
37
CLOSE UP: JASON HANGS UPSIDE DOWN, face smeared with
chocolate as he eats a HUGE, WIDE CAND? EAR.

JASON
(eating)
Nothing.

CUT TO:
38 HAROLD
38
HAROLD HANGS UPSIDE DOWN

HAROLD
Twenty, nineteen, eighteen, seventeen,
sixteen -—

CUT TO:
39 LEO
39
LEO HANGS UPSIDE DOWN
C LEO
The astronauts live upside down like
this.

PAN TO:
40 RAYMOND
40
RAYMOND, full body, standing on the sand, upside down.
CANERA NOW TURNS RIGHTSIDE UP.

RAYMOND
(RIGHTSIDE UP)
They do not.

RUTH
How do you know?

BOBBI
His uncle works at NASA.

(CONTINUED)
C
 33.
40 CONTINUED: 40

JASON
Does not.

I ‘Th Does, too.

RAYMOND
I got a free tour on summer
vacation.

BOEBI
You can’t beat that.

HAROLD, RUTH, LEO, JASON LOOK SILENTLY IMPRESSED.

RUTH
Harold said his mother’s having a baby.

BOBBI
Big deal.

JASON
(eating)
It j. a big deal.

LEO
She’s gonna get really fat.

JASON
Super fat.

RUTH
Then they have to take it out of her.
C LEO
How?

RUTH
With tweezers.

RAYMOND
It comes out in a plastic bag.

JASON
(eating)
It does not.

RAYMOND
And they put it in the microwave.

JASON
(skeptical)
Like a frozen burrito?

(CONTINUED)
C
 34.
40 CONTINUED; (2) 40

RAYMOND
(dead serious)
Exactly like a frozen burrito.

HAROLD LOOKS SHOCKED, as do the others. But Raymond looks

calmly sure of himself.

LEO
That’s a lie.

RAYMOND
(intensely extends pinky)
You wanna make a bet?

BOBBI
It happened to him.

RAYMOND
I was premature and they put me in the
microwave.

RUTH
Incubator.

RAYMOND
Microwave.

BOBBI
It happened to him! He knows!

RUTH
It happened to my sister!

JASON VOMITS, primarily chocolate and nuts, as he hangs

upside down.

HAROLD LOOKS MORTIFIED.

RAYMOND
Gross.

BOBBI
Yuchh.

Everyone drops from the monkey bars to look at the vomit.

CUT TO:
41 POV FROM THE GROUND 41
AS KIDS LOOK DOWN INTO THE CARA (at the vomit):

(CONTINUED)
C-
 35.
41 CONTINUED:
41

RUTH
(viewing the vomit)
It’s all chocolate and peanuts.

LEO
There’s some Cheerios in it, too.

JASON
I didn’t have Cheerios today.

RUTh
It’s macaroni.

JASON
That’s from last night.

CUT TO:
42 HAROLD —
42
HAROLD STARING INTENSELY AT THE VOMIT.

RUTH
You should go home if you’re sick.

JASON
I’m not sick.

He RESUMES EATING HIS CHOCOLATE BAR.

JASON
(continuing)
I just can’t eat upside down.

THIS STARTS A FIT OF GIGGLING ALL AROUND, except for RAYMOND.

RAYMOND
Babies throw up all the time.

BOBBI
My baby throws up on everything.

LEO
And they pee on everything, even your
favorite toys.

JASON
They make doody on your toys.

THIS PROVOKES A WILD FIT OF LAUGHTER in all of

them, EXCEPT
HAROLD, THO LOOKS WORRIED.

(CONTINUED)

C
 36.
42 CONTINUED:
42

RUTH
Then they put the toys in their mouth.

EVEN WILDER LAUGHTER.

RAYMOND
You have to stop them.

BOBBI
You have to bite them.

LEO
You do.

JASON
(eating)
You can pinch them, if nobody sees you.

RUTH
You have to bend their fingers and toes
back.

BOBBI
Or else they get your goat.

RAYMOND
They can get your goat, it’s true.

LEO
And your Mommy and Daddy don’ t even pick
you up anymore, they’re so busy.

JASON
They make you share everything.

RUTH
Where’s Harold going?

They all look up --

CUT TO:
43 HAROLD
43
Long shot of Harold’s back as he runs acro
ss the playground
and toward the school.

CUT TO:
44 INT. SCHOOL HALL - DAY
44
Harold walks down the empty hail, RUNNING HIS PURPLE CRAYON
ALONG THE WALL, LEAVING A LINE.

CUT TO:

C
 37.

45 HAROLD’S FACE
45
CLOSE UP: HAROLD’S INTENSE, ENOTION-FILLED
BLUE EYES, as he
is walking and concentrating on somethin
g

CUT TO:
46 HAROLD’S HAND
46
Medium close, tracking shot follows Haxb
ld’s hand, arm and
crayon as he draws a purple line on the yello
w wall down
--

the hail around a water fountain, the BATH

ROOM DOOR OPENS and
HE DRAWS across the white T-shirt of a BEWI
LDERED KID with
big, bugging wide eyes and weird hair stick
ing up like bird
feathers in a messy way. And around a corner and down the
hail.

MOVE:
47 INTO THE LINE
47
Match dissolve to the animated version of
the line.
Pull out and the ANIMATED HAROLD is draw
ing the line; he
BREAKS OFF A PIECE and turns it into a
LEASH. HE starts to
draw a small, dopey GOAT on a rope—leash.

MATADOR’ S LEGS GO RUNNING FRANTICALLY

BY.

MATADOR
(O.S.)
Harold! Gracias a diós!

Harold ignores the Matador. He completes the drawing of the

goat.

MATADOR
(O.S.: continuing)
Could you please come over here?

The GOAT runs to he left. Harold goes after him and grabs
the leash.

We now see the Matador’s head, arms, and

torso PINNED DOWN BY
THE LION, who DROOLS OVER HIM. Lion allows the drool to drop
onto the MATADOR’S FOREHEAD like a Chin
es water torture, AS
MATADOR SQUINTS AND TWISTS AND TUFNS.

HAROLD
(DRAWING)
This is my goat. Don’t let the baby get
it.

(CONTINUED)
 38.
47 CONTINUED:
47
MATADOR
Baby? What about this Lion?

HAROLD
Just watch my goat.

HAROLD COMPLETES HIS DRAWING

OF A BIG STEAMING STEAK ON A
PLATE, garnishes it with a stal
k of parsley, and pours som
STEAK SAUCE OVER IT. e

THE SNELL OF THE STEAK WAFTS

OVER IN WAVY LINES TO THE LION
who immediately leaves the Mata ,
dor to start EATING the stea
k.
MATADOR
Thank you so much. I was afraid you’d
forgotten all about me for that
ridiculous goat.

HAROLD
I didn’t forget about you.

HAROLD DRAWS A STRING, TIES

IT TO A POST, and when the
MATADOR’S LEGS COME RUNNING PAS
T, HE PULLS THE STRING TIGHT,
TRIPPING THE LEGS. He drags the legs over to the
MATADOR.
MATADOR
I feel like a mess.

HAROLD
You look like a mess.
Li
MATADOR
Thank you very much, my friend
let us not
forget you drew half of me, OK?

USING HIS CRAYON AS A NEEDLE

TRAILING A LINE OF PURPLE LINE
THREAD, HAROLD SEWS THE MATADO
R’S LEGS BACK ON.

MATADOR
(continuing)
No! Major surgery!

MATADOR COVERS HIS EYES WIT

H ONE HAND.

MATADOR
(continuing)
Santa Maria de Avila, tell me when it’s
over.

HAROLD
(SEWING)
Don’t be such a baby.

(CONTINUED)
 39.
47 CONTINUED: (2)
47

MATADOR
I cannot stand the sight of blood.

HAROLD
You dont have any blood.

MATADOR TRIES TO STAND. AND HE IS LILTING TO ONE SIDE.

MATADOR
How can I fight a bull like hees?

HE WALKS WITH A PRONOUNCED LIMP, leaning to one side.

HAROLD PULLS A SQUARE SHAPE FROM MATADOR’
S TORSO --

MATADOR
(continuing)
Hey --

Harold PLACES the square INTO MATADORS

LIMPING SIDE.

HAROLD
Try that.

MATADOR WALKS STRAIGHT NOW. LION BELCHES AS HE LICKS HIS

CHOPS, having finished the steak.

MATADOR
Magnifico. I’m back. Now whats the
agenda for the goat?

HAROLD
The agenda is for the baby.

MATADOR
What exactly ees the baby?

HAROLD
It starts like a burrito.

Harold finishes drawing a BIG MICROWAV

E OVEN much bigger
than himself.
--

MATADOR
(picks up leash to goat)
Burritos sabrosa.
--

Harold draws a huge plastic pouch with

a giant burrito
inside.

Lion drools and comes forward, CURIOUS as --

(CONTINUED)
 40.
47 CONTINUED: (3)
47

Harold puts the big plastic pouch into the big microw
ave and
turns it on: Beep Beep Beeeep.
--

They wait. Nothing.

MATADOR OPENS THE MICROWAVE DOOR. He puiis out the big

bag,
fogged up so we cannot see the contents.

MATADOR
(continuing)
Maybe it needs another ten seconds of
nuking.

HAROLD DRAWS SCISSORS AND AGGRESSIVELY CUTS OPEN THE

BAG.

BABY
(0.5.)
Ah-Ah- -

MATADOR
Careful Harold, you dont want to hurt
the so-called baby, do you?

Harold looks innocently over his shoulder as he keeps poking

the scissors aggressively into the plastic bag.

BABY
(O.S.)
Ah-Ah- -

C When Harold has ripped a hole, a GIANT MOVING BABY emerge

from the pouch big and stupid looking.
--
s
It drools a big,
purple pool on the ground.

LION
Disgusting.

Suddenly a fire-hydrant gush of purple pee sprouts from

the
baby (whose back is turned to camera) shooting the Matador
--

in the face, knocking him over along with the goat.

Lion is
then gushed on wetting and flattening his mighty mane
--
--

he looks skinny, dripping, pathetic, pissed off.

THE LION ROARS with DISPLEASURE.

HAROLD DRAWS A HAIR DRYER mounted on a stand, and points it

at the LION. HIS MANE BEGINS TO BLOW DRY, which he appears
to enjoy.

Suddenly the porcupine ambles by, oblivious, follow

ed by the
moose, also oblivious. Harold and Matador watch them pass
for a moment, while Lion dries his hair.

(CONTINUED)
 41.
47 CONTINUED: (4)
47

Meanwhile, the gush of purple pee from the baby continues.

Harold iickly draws an umbrella, which he

opens. This
allows him to get under the gush of purole
pee to draw a
DIAPER on the baby, stopping the pee. The baby turns around
to face us now, and STARTS BURPING LIKE SONE
THING IS COMING
UP HIS ESOPHAGUS. MATADOR AND LION LOOK NERVOUS HAROLD--

DRAWS THEM CLOSED UIRELLAS WHICH THEY EACH STRUGGLE TO

--

OPEN -- AS THE BABY BELCHES --

A HUGE GOB OF PURPLE SPIT-UP lands on Matador.

THEN his
umbrella pops open, a beat too late.

The exact same thing happens to the Lion, making

him wet
again. Matador and Lion stand side by side, only their
eyes
visable through the purple gunk all over them.
The baby then
sits on the goat.

GOAT
(WEAKLY)
Blaaat.

HAROLD
My goat!

The GOAT’S HEAD sticks out from under the big

baby’s diapered
bottom, EYES BULGING.

MATADOR
ATTACK!

Harold attacks the baby’s big fat foot with

his umbrella,
then struggles to bend the baby’s big toe back,
his face
straining with effort and anger.

The Matador charges with his sword and smack

s at the baby’s
leg with it.

Lion ROARS and REARS up above baby’s head

-- JAWS OPEN WIDE
to bite the baby’s head off when --

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
(O.S.)
What is this mess?!

The Lion freezes as the texture of the wall

returns with a
vacu.me seal like sound.

WHIP PAN FROM DRAWING TO:

C
 42.

48 INT. SCHOOL HALL LIVE ACTION

--
- DAY
48
PAN from the purple line on
the wall, to an irate MR.
LIEBENGUTHE, to down the
hail where, at the very end of
--

the hail, Harold peers she

epishly around the corner.

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
Harold I

CUT TO:
49 INT. SCHOOL HALL - LATER
49
Harold scrubs the wall with
a soapy brush, a bucket at his
feet.

RAYMOND
(taunting)
Oooh, you’re in troubillile

BOBBI
Mr. Reee--tttt---aarr--

Bobbi FREEZES as the teache

r walks up.

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
what were you saying, Bobbi?

CUT TO:
50 INT. SCHOOL HALL - LATER
50
BOBBI AND RAYMOND STAND ALO
NGSIDE RAYMOND, SCRUBBING THE WALL
WITH HIM.

RAYMOND
I hate you, Harold.

BOBBI
Me, too.

HAROLD LOOKS INNOCENTLY WID

E-EYED as he scrubs the wall.

CUT TO:
51 INT. CLASSROOM - DAY
51
CLOSE UP:

WARREN
I think we’re an extreme
ly normal family.

(CONTINUED)
 43.
51 CONTINUED:
51

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
May I ask what do you do for a living?

PULL BACK REVEALS: WARREN, SONIA AND HAROLD SIT

IN KIDDIE
CHAIRS looking at Mr. Liebenguthe. It.’s after school and the
classroom is otherwise empty.

WARREN
I work for the telephone company.

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
Doing what, exactly?

WARREN
I oversee a team responsible for
maintaining the quality of the dial tone.

CUT TO:
52 HAROLD
52
Listening intently.

CUT TO:
53 INT. PHONE COMPANY
53
WARREN wears a headset as he stands on a platform,
overlooking a room full of 50 workers turning big
dials arid
pushing buttons at their desks.
Q MAESTRO WITH AN ORCHESTRA.
HE IS CONDUCTING LIKE A

CUT TO:
54 INT. CLASSROOM
54
MR. LIEBENGUTHE
You maintain the dial tone?

WARREN
It sounds simple, but the job requires a
lot of patience and attention to detail.
I mean there are days when, if we weren’t
careful, we’d have a sloppy, inconsistent
tone over half the state just like that.
(HE SNAPS HIS FINGERS
DRAMATICALLY)

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
Do you work, Mrs. Williams?

(CONTINUED)
 54 CONTINUED:
54

SONIA
I’m a graphic artist

WARREN
You know the cover of last year’s
phonebook?

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
I’m not sure I can picture it --

SONIA
The big glass balls?

WARREN
With the dried pasta arranged around
them?

HAROLD SMILES PROUDLY

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
Oh, yeah, I really like that cover.

WARREN
That was Sonia’s design.

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
Well, congratulations.

SONIA

(J Thank you.

WARREN
But we’re not here to talk about us.

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
Yes and no, Mr. Williams.

WARREN
What do you mean by that, Mr.
Lieberiguthe?

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
I just want to know if there is something
going on at home that I should know
about. Something that might, for
example, prompt Harold to draw a picture
of a lion biting off the head of a baby.

Warren and Sofia look at each other.

(CONTINUED)
 45.
54 CONTINUED: (2)
54

SONIA
We’re going to have another child.

WEN
And we just told Harold.

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
Well, I’m not Siamund Freud, but I thin
k
we just hit the symbolic nail on the
so-
called symbolic head.

HAROLD
But it’s not going to be a normal baby
.
Mr. Liebenguthe looks mortified.

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
I am so sorry, I had no idea.

WARREN
Wait a second --

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
I was just telling the kids today how
devastating it is to use the word
‘re
tard’ as an insult.

WARREN
The baby’s going to be perfectly fine
, as
far as we know.

SONIA
I don’t know where Harold gets thes
e
ideas.

Harold looks away, innocently, eyebrows raised.

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
Clearly, we’ve got an immediate need
for
improved communication between par
ent and
child. Do you have any books to help
with the interface of Harold and
the new
baby?

S ON IA
We’ve got lots of books.

MR. T.IEBENGUTHE
I’d like to recommend a new one enti
tled-

CUT TO:

C
C
 46.

55 INT. WARREN AND SONIA’S BEDROO

M - NIGHT
55
SONIA
(reading)
“It’s OK To Be Angry Sometim
es,” by Dr.
Gertrude Spiegel.

SHE OPENS THE BOOK AND TURNS

TO THE FIRST PAGE. IC is an
oversized, hardacked, childr
en’s book.
HAROLD is snuggled NEXT TO SON
IA on their aueen-sized bed
They are all wearing pajamas. .

SONIA
(reading; continuing)
“Jordan’s mommy is going to
have a baby.
The baby is going to live in
the house
with all of them.”

HAROLD
Where’s our baby going to liv
e?
SONIA
Here. In this house.

HAROLD
Really?

SONIA
Yes.

HAROLD
Can he live with Grandma?

SONIA
No, he’s part of this family

SONIA
(continuing- reading)
“Jordan has feelings about
sharing his
house with the new baby. He’s scared
there won’t be enough love,
time, and
toys for him. This makes Jordan very
angry sometimes, and that’s
OK for him Co
talk about.”

CUT TO:
56 BOOK
56
An illustration of angry Jordan.

CUT TO:

C
 47.

57 SONIA AND HAROLD

57
Sofia turns the page

SONIA
‘Sometimes Jordan imagines the
baby will
be a monster, but no little baby
is a
monster. Babies are small and helpless
and need lots of love.”

CUT TO:
58 BOOK
58
Illustration: Jordan scared of a little baby.

CUT TO:
59 SONIA AND HAROLD
59
HAROLD
Is the baby in your stomach?

SONIA
Sort of, yes.

HAROLD
What if he stayed in there?

C SONIA
You know, Harold, this baby is
look up to you with a lot of
going to
love. He or
she is going to need your pro
tection and
your help.

HAROLD
Don’t babies know how to do
anything?

SONIA
Very little, but, people use
d to say that
before they’re born, babies
know
everything there is to know
.

HAROLD
They do?

SONIA
(NODS)
They even know the future.

HAROLD LOOKS PUZZLED.

C (CONTINUED)
C
 48.
59 CONTINUED:
59

HAROLD
Then why do they need so much help?

SONIA
Because just before they’re born, an
angel touches them on the mouth right
here and says “Hush, don’t tell
everything you know.” That’s why they
say we all have this little dent above
our mouths.

HAROLD LOOKS SUBTLY SHOCKED BY THIS WEIRD INFOR

11ATION, and
touches his mother’s mouth with one finge
r, as he imagines
the angel would.

SONIA
(continuing)
And that’s why life is still an adventure
for everyone who’s born. And while
babies can’t say what knew before they
were born, they definitely need someone
to teach them how to draw and how to talk
and how to walk after they’re born, and
that means a big brother.

HAROLD LISTENS

SONIA
(continuing)
(N It’s really your baby, too, see?
Harold looks down at AN ILLUSTRATION OF JORD
AN PROUDLY
HOLDING HIS BABY BROTHER.

CUT TO:
60 INT. HAROLD’S ROOM - NIGHT
60
Warren HANDS HAROLD THE GLASS OF WATER AS
HAROLD SITS UP IN
BED.

HAROLD SIPS THE WATER, puts it on the

nightstand, and lies
back as Sonia TUCKS HIM IN.

SONIA
Sleep tight, big brother.

They leave HAROLD STARING INTO HIS BEDS

IDE FISH TANK, which
is lit up and has several tropical fish
in it. when the door
closes -- HE PULLS OUT HIS PAD AND CRAYON. Harold start
s to
draw a small TEDDY BEAR.

PUSH IN TO SEE:

C
C
 49.

61 ANIMATED HAROLD
61
COMPLETE THE TEDDY BEAR.

HEAR LION GROWL-GROANING OFF SCRE

EN. HAROLD LOOKS UP FROM
THE TEDDY BEAR --

PAN TO:
62 LION
62
LION IS ON HIS BACK AND MATADOR IS
USING A BROOMSTICK TO
STUFF THE LAST PART OF THE MONSTER
BABY INTO THE LIONS
MOUTH.

THE LION FINALLY GULPS AND LOOKS COMP

LETELY STUFFED. HE LIES
ON HIS BACK WITH A BULGING BELLY.

MATADOR
Good riddance to that. horrible crea
ture
who soiled us, thanks to me, Juan
Pancho
de las Fuertes.

THE GOAT EATS THE DIAPER DANGLING

FROM MATADOR’S SWORD.

MATADOR
(continuing)
Qué pasa, señor?

HAROLD IS DRAWING A CRUDE PICTURE

OF HIS MOTHER. (
HAROLD
That baby was a mistake.

MATADOR
You can say that again, my friend.

HAROLD
I mean, it was the wrong baby.

Harold TILTS HIS MOTHER’S HEAD to

the side,as if it were
HINGED AT THE NECK, SEPARATING IT
FROM THE NECK ON ONE SIDE
(HINGED ON THE OTHER) with the sound of opening the hood
--

of a car.

THE MOTHER’S HANDS TH REACH IN AND

PULL OUT A LITTLE BABY
small, cute, gurgling, crawling. -

MATADOR IS MORTIFIED.

(CONTINUED)
 50.
62 CONTINUED:
62

MATADOR
Step back, everyone I

HAROLD
Look at him. Helpless, small, he needs
an older brother to show him how to do
things.

MATADOR
Don’t get cocky, Harold. Th child
looks extremely dangerous to me. And
let’s not forget I have a goat to
protect.

THE NEW LITTLE BABY CRAWLS toward LION LYING

ON HIS BACK.

LEO
(on his back)
I’m too full to eat another by just
yet, but I suppose I could kill it now
and eat it later. Maybe you could draw
me a stay-fresh bag and a refrigerator,
Harold?

HAROLD
This baby’s not for eating.

HAROLD DRAWS A FLOWER POT WITH A DAISY and STICK

S IT ONTO THE
END OF THE MATADOR’ S SWORD.

( HAROLD
(continuing)
This is a helpless baby, see?
MATADOR LOWERS THE FLOWER POT, and THE
BABY PICKS THE FLOWER
AND EATS IT. Matador backs up to the reclining Lion, and
they cautiously watch the baby chewing the flow
er.

HAROLD
(continuing)
Are you hungry?

THE BABY AND HAROLD LOOK AT EACH OTHE

R.

HAROLD
(continuing)
I’m your brother, Harold

BABY
(REACHES FOR CRAYON)
Gwaaaa 1

(CONTINUED)
C
 51.
62 CONTINUED: (2) 62

HAROLD
(LAUGHS)
No, you cant eat this. Here-

( Harold draws a CHICKEN DRUMSTICK, which the baby consumes.

Then he draws a STALK OF BROCCOLI---

HAROLD
Now, broccoli is my most favdrite food of
all --

BABY SPITS IT OUT VIOLENTLY -- toward Matador -- who is

sprayed --

MATADOR
Either this baby goes, or we go!

LION
(RASPY DRAWL)
I’d eat him now, but I got such horrible
indigestion. Just give me a stay—fresh
bag, and I’ll --

MATADOR
Watch out!

THE BABY CRAWLS ONTO THE LIONS’ BLOATED TUMMY.

LION
Easy, I got some gas pains there --

THE BABY JUMPS UP AND DOWN ON LION’S TUMMY, as if it were a

trampoline.

LION
(IN RHYT WITH EACH BOUNCE)
Uhh, uhh, uhh, uhh BELLLLLLLCH}!
--

BABY
Ugga—gwaaba-dabba.

LION
Ugga—gwaaba-dabba - I feel much better.
Thanks, kidlet.

HE LICKS THE BABY HEAD TO TOE BABY GIGGLES--

BUT NOW THE --

LION HAS HAD A TASTE AND HIS FACE CHANGES HE OPENS WIDE --

AND --

(CONTINUED)
 52.
62 CONTINUED: (3)
62

HAROLD
Hey!

HAROLD SWIPES THE BABY AWAY JUST AS THE

LION’S JAWS SNAP
SHUT.

MATADOR
What did I tell you, my friend?

HAROLD
You two don’t know how to treat the baby,
so we’ll go.

MATADOR
Ha, where will you go hermano?

HAROLD
We could go downtown, I suppose --

LION
What downtown?

HAROLD
(BRANDISHES CRAYON)
See, this is a crayon for drawing, baby -

HAROLD STARTS TO DRAW A STREET, and build

ings, and SUDDENLY
OUR PERSPECTIVE CHANGES AND THEY LOOM UP,
3-0 --

CUT TO:
63 TALL BUILDING
63
STANDING LION AND MATADOR ON THE LEDGE
OF A TALL BUILDING,
with the goat on the leash, as well.

MATADOR
Carainba, hijo mio, I am afraid of
heights!

HAROLD
See you later.

Harold leads the baby by the hand throu

gh the city he has
constructed, AND HE ADDS DETAILS WITH
HIS CRAYON AS HE GOES -

HAROLD
(continuing)
Make this a sneaker store, and this a
broccoli store and --

The BABY EXCITEDLY JUMPS AND REACHES

FOR THE CRAYON --

(CONTINUED)
C
 53.
63 CONTINUED:
63

HAROLD
(continuing)
Oh, you wanna learn to draw? OK, I’ll
give you a lesson --

HE HANDS THE CRAYON TO THE BABY, and BEFORE HE OWS IT, the
baby has drawn a SQUIGGLY LINE --

HAROLD
(continuing)
Not bad for a start --

HE APPRAISES THE LINE and ADJUSTS IT WITH HIS HANDS --

BUT SUDDENLY WATER RISES UP TO HIS WAIST!

HAROLD TURNS TO SEE THAT THE BABY’S SQUIGGLY LINE HAS BECONE
A RISING TIDE OF WATER, filling the street.

HAROLD
(continuing)
Oh, no!

HAROLD SWIMS FRANTICALLY AFTER THE BABY. A WAVE OF WATER

STARTS TO CARRY HAROLD, IT CRASHES JUST AS HE’S REACHING FOR
THE BABY -- AND SENDS THEN BOTH FLYING IN A RUSH OF WATER
BETWEEN THE BUILDINGS.

CUT TO:
C 64 LION
64
LION IS CAREFULLY CLIMBING DOWN FROM THE BUILDING, REACHING
OUT HIS BACK FOOT FOR LEVERAGE, while MATADOR TRIES TO HELP.

LION’S GROPING FOOT STEPS ON MATADOR’S FACE AND SHOULDER --

MATADOR
Just get down, already! I never saw a
cat so afraid of a little climbing.

LION SLIPS AND CLINGS TO MATADOR, IN HIS ARMS LIKE A BABY.

MATADOR
(continuing)
For heaven’s sake, show a little dignity!

Lion steps down and wipes sweat from his brow.

LION
Thank God that’s over.

(CONTINUED)
 54.
64 CONTINUED:
64

A RULING STARTS TO GROW LOUDER. They look up AND A HUGE

WAVE OF WATER, CARRYING HAROLD AND THE BABY
, CRASHES OVER
THEM AS THEIR EYES POP WIDE --

MATADOR
SAN-TA MA-RI-AAAL

ALL FOUR OF THEM HAROLD, BABY, MATADOR, LION

-

- ARE SWEPT
DOWN THE STREET BY THE RUSHING WATER --

THE BABY SINKS.

HAROLD DIVES, FOLLOWING THE BABY DOWN, DOWN, DEEPER INTO THE
WATER.

HE DIVES PAST SINKING BUILDINGS FROM THE CRUM

ELING CITY.
THE BABY DISAPPEARS THROUGH AN OPENING AT THE BOTT
OM. Harold
goes through to the other side, and finds hims
elf in a DARK,
PURPLE, RAGING SEA on a BLACK background
(versus the
previously WHITE background).

HAROLD POPS UP IN THE WAVES AND JUST MANAGES

TO SEE THE BABY
INADVERTENTLY DRAW ANOTHER SQUIGGLY LINE, COUN
TER TO THE
SWELLS, WHICH BECOMES --

A RAGING SEA SERPENT

THE SEA SERPEMT COMES AFTER HAROLD, who manages to scramble

into a FLOATING BUILDING --

INSIDE THE BUILDING, HAROLD opens a door and --

IT’S JORDAN -the boy from the book, It’s OK To Be Angry,

who looks SCARY as he cocks HIS SHOTGUN.

HAROLD SLAMS THE DOOR SHUT ON JORDAN. THE SERPENT IS WINDING

ITS WAY IN AND OUT OF WINDOWS, THROUGH THE BUILD
ING --

HAROLD DIVES OUT A WINDOW AND THE SERPENT

IS DIVING AFTER HIM
WHEN --

BOOM, BOOM, THE SERPENT IS BLOWN AWAY. BY WHAT? HAROLD

LOOKS OVER AND SEES CANNONS FIRE FROM A HUGE
AIRCRAFT
CARRIER.

SUDDENLY THERE IS A THROBBING SOUND OVERHEAD

THE ROTARY OF
--

A HELICOPTER Harold looks up as he treads water

--
--

A LADDER is lowered down to Harold.

He climbs up to find the BABY PILOTING THE CHOP

PER, wearing a
helmet, shades, and a big grin.

(CONTINUED)
 55.
64 CONTINUED: (2)
64
THE BABY gives Harold the thumbs up. A crowd cheers.
Harold looks down from the chopper and sees
a crowd of
SAILORS on the deck of an aircraft carrier
cheering.
--

MATADOR
(O.S.)
This baby ees tantástico, Harold
HAROLD WHIPS AROUND TO SEE THE MATADOR, GOAT
AND LION seated
in the rear of the helicopter all wearing shades, helmets,
--

and grins to match the babys.

MATADOR
The Goat is completely dry, Harold!
LION IS USING A PORTABLE HAIR DRYER TO RE-FLUFF
HIS MANE.

LI ON
The little genius can really draw.

HAROLD
Give me back my crayon.

The baby ignores him.

HAROLD
(peeved)
Give me my crayon.

C! The baby smiles aat him.

HAROLD
(louder)
Give me my crayon!

BABY
(pauses, then says his first
word)
No.

HAROLD GRABS THE CRAYON.

HE AND THE BABY WRESTLE OVER IT.

NO ONE IS PILOTING THE CHOPPER, WHICH TILTS SIDEWAYS AND

STARTS TO GO DOWN --

MATADOR
Harold! You are a madman!

(COID) C
C
 56.
64 CONTINUED: (3) 64

LION
(sad, looking down)
I don’t want to oet wet again.

C BABY -

(smiling as he sings)
“Hot child in the city—-”

The helicopter sinks down into the water, sideways, as the

baby continues to sing --

BABY
(continuing; singing
underwater with gurgling
effect)
“Dressin so fine, lookin’ so pretty-”

Harold WRESTLES the crayon away and DRAWS HIS MOTHER AGAIN
around the baby trapping it safely inside her tuiriny. he
--

baby struggles angrily to get out.

BABY
(continuing)
Let me out!

He places a man hole cover on the hole in his mom’s stomach,

leaving a non-animated drawing of his mom.

65 INT. HAROLD’S BEDROOM / LIVE ACTION -

PULL OUT TO:

EARLY MORNING 65
C)
We see this WET DRAWING OF THE BABY TRAPPED INSIDE THE
MOTHER’S TU4Y draped across Harold’s chest as he sleeps on
top of his covers. Drawings are everywhere all over the
--

bed and floor.

DISOLVE TO:
66 INT. HAROLD’S BEDROOM / LATER MORNING 66
WARREN
Time to get up, pal. You mustve been
drawing all night what’s this?
--

(picks up a drawing)
A helicopter -- wow --

Harold sits up groggily --

WARREN
(continuing)
Harold -- you’re soaking wet!

(CONTINUED)
 57.
66 CONTINUED:
66

Harold looks at his drenched pajamas -- his hair is soaked,

too.

WARREN
(continuing; goes to door)
Sofia Harold’s soaking wet-
-—

SONIA
(meets Warren at the door)
What?

WARREN
(whispers confidentially)
I think he wet his bed like really wet
--

his bed.

SONIA
(walks into the room; to
Warren)
No.
(to Harold as she rubs his
forehead)
You’re all sweaty. Did you have a bad
. .

dream?

Harold anxiuosly looks at the crayon on his nightstand.

CUT TO:
67 EXT. STREET - DAY 67
Harold and other children board the SCHOOL BUS near his
house-- a warm autumn day, no coats.

The BUS DRIVER IS SINGING ALONG WITH HIS LOUD PIO AS KIDS
BOARD THE BUS.

BUS DRIVER
(sings)
I love you BA-BY, and if it’s cuite all
right, I need you BA—BY, to let me hold
you tight, and let me love you BA-BY, let
me love youuuu -—

HAROLD walks by the driver stoically.

CUT TO:
68 INT. CLASSROOM - DAY 68

(CONTINUED)
 58.
68 CONTINUED:
68

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
Now what do we call the BABY bear?

c: A cub.
RUTH

HAROLD LOOKS DEAD PAN AS HE SLOWLY ROLLS HIS CRAYON

TO THE
EDGE OF HIS DESK WHERE IT DROPS OFF AND HE MANES NO
MOVE TO
PICK IT UP.

MR. LIEBENGUTHE
How about the BABY whale?

CUT TO:
69 INT. SCHOOL CAFETERIA DAY
-
69
AN ODD LOOKING WOMAN WEARING A HAIR NET serves Harold across
the counter.

CAFETERIA WOMAN
(BIG GRIN)
We got baby corn and baby peas today!

CUT TO:
70 CLOSE UP: TELEVISION SCREEN --
70
A MAN DRESSED IN A BIG FOAM BABY HEAD ADVERTISES AN AUTO
REPAIR GARAGE:

BABY HEAD MAN

(ON V)
Bob just had a baby, so come on down with
yours and get special discounts at Bobs
Car Shop.

THE CHANNEL CHANGES TO-

OPENING TITLE CARD FOR ROSARY’ S BABY’.

CUT TO:
71 HAROLD
71
HAROLD POINTS THE ROTE CONTROL.

CUT TO:
72 TELEVISION
72
THE CHANNEL CHANGES TO--

(CONTINUED)
C:
 59.
72 CONTINUED: 72

A DIAPER CORCIAL

CUT TO: C
73 SONIA 73
HAROLD’S MOM COS UP WEARING A LEOTARD AND TIGHTS, A SLIGHT
BULGE IN HER TUNNY, AS SHE TAKES THE RENOTE FROM HAROLD AND
SWITCHES CHANNELS TO --

CUT TO:
74 TELEVISION 74
AEROBICS FOR PREGNANT WON - - WE SEE A SCREEN FULL OF TH24
WORKING OUT.

SONIA JOINS IN.

CUT TO:
75 HAROLD 75
HAROLD GETS UP.

CUT TO:
76 CRAYON 76
CLOSE ON: UNTOUCHED CRAYON ON SOFA AS HAROLD WALKS PAST IT.
C CUT TO:
77 INT. KITCHEN 77
WARREN HOLDS KNITTING YARN AROUND BOTH HANDS AS HE FOLLOWS
SONIA AROUND THE KITCHEN.

SHE HOLDS THE KNITTING IN ONE HAND, AND CUTS HAROLD’S

SANDWICH WITH THE OTHER, then pops it into a baggie.

CUT TO:
78 EXT. PLAYGROUND AT SCHOOL - EARLY WINTER 78
KIDS WEAR COATS

Harold looks glum as he sits on a still swing while his

friends SWING on the swingset and SING, to uhe tune of “BINGO
WAS HIS NANE.’

(CONTINUED)
 60.
78 CONTINUED: 78

LEO, RUTH, JASON

(SPELLING)
B-A-B-Y-Y, B-A-B-Y-Y, B-A-B-A--Y-Y and
Raymond is a ba-b --

PYMOND IS ABOUT TO SHOOT A GE JATER RIFLE AT TH4, when

suddenly MR. LIEBENGUTHE APPEARS and GRABS RAYMOND BY THE ARM
AND PULLS HIM AWAY.

HAROLD OPENS HIS LUNCH BAG AND PULLS OUT BABY SOCKS AND
ITTING NEEDLES.

CUT TO:

79 INT. SCHOOL BUS - DAY 79

Harold sits on the bus, going home, in his winter coat,

depressed.

The bus slowly passes a man in a big foam baby suit,

promoting a local garage, handing out leaflets.

MAN IN BABY SUIT

Show us your baby, get a free muffler!
Show two babies, get a free break job!

THE BUS STOPS AND HAROLD GETS OFF, a bit wild eyed.

BUS DRIVER
(SINGS, AS KIDS LEAVE)
C Be myyy, be my, be my little baby, Be
myyy, be my little baby tonighttttt—

CUT TO:

80 EXT. STREET - DAY 80

Harold runs off the bus, TOWARDS HIS FRONT DOOR, PASSING A
NEIGHBOR WHO IS CARRYING GROCERIES.

NEIGHBOR
(shouts as Harold runs by)
How’s that new baby coming along?!

CUT TO:

81 INT. FOYER - DAY 81

Harold BURSTS through the front door and runs upstairs to his
room.

CUT TO:

C,
 51.

82 INT. HAROLD’S ROOM DAY

-
82
CLOSE UP: HAROLD BURSTS IN and FREEZES N HIS TRACKS. He is
looking through the BARS OF A CRIB at his father, who is
assembling the crib.

WARREN
This was yours when you were a baby,
remember?

SONIA
Why don’t you help your father assemble
the crib, Harold?

HAROLD GOES TO HIS CLOSET, pulls out his backpack, and begins
stuffing it full of toys and clothes and crayons.

WARREN
What are you doing?

HAROLD
I’m running away.

SONIA
It’s kind of cold to run away, Harold.
You won’t make it very far.

HAROLD
When is it warm enough to run away?

WARREN
May is a good month to travel.

SONIA
But that’s when he baby is due --

Harold goes to his wall calender, pulls out his purple crayon
and draws a line through the weeks, from November, through
December, January, February, March, April --

83 MONTAGE 83
But as he’s doing this, he sees that the room behind him is
racing forward as if it were a video tape.

The sky outside flashes from day to night, rain to sun.

The crib is built and removed. His father disappears,

reappears in different clothes maxy times, and his mother
does the same LIKE A TAPE ON HIGH SPEED FAST FORWARD.
--

CUT TO:

C
 62.

84 INT. HAROLD S ROOM - NIGHT

84
HIS MOTHER WALKS UP, NINE MONTHS PREGNANT, with a GE belly.
SONIA
(continuing)
How do I look, big guy?

Harold’s eyes roll back into his

head and he passes out
backwards.

CUT TO:
85 INT. HAROLD’S ROOM - DAY
86
Harold lies sleeping.

SONIA
(O.S.)
Time to get up, sleepy head.

HAROLD OPENS HIS EYES AND LOOKS AT

HIS MOTHER, who is indeed,
NINE MONTHS PREGNANT.

SONIA
You must’ve had quite a day. You went
right to sleep in your clothes, rio
dinner
or anything.

HAROLD

C (STARES AT HER BIG BELLY)

Time’s going so fast.

SONIA
What do you mean, honey?

HAROLD
Time went so fast.

SONIA
You must’ve been dreaming somethin
g, do
you want to tell me what it was?

OUTSIDE THE WINDOW, the sky is blue, the trees are green,
birds are singing. It is May.

HAROLD
It s warm enough to run away now
.
Harold GETS UP AND FINDS HIS BACK
PACK, still packed, in the
closet.

(CONTINDED) C!
 63
8E CONTINUED:
SE

SONIA
Oh, don’t start that again, Harold,
please.

WARREN
What’s going on?

Harold passes 4arren on his way

out.

SONIA
Harold’s running away again.

CUT TO:
86 EXT. STREET - DAY
86
Harold walks briskly down the SUNN
Y sidewalk, all alone,
backpack strapped onto his back,
his pad in his hand. He
gets to a BIG INTERSECTION and wai
ts at—the corner.
The CAMERA DOLLIES TO REVEAL HIS
PARENTS IN THEIR CAR,
driving along the curb.

The car stops and WARREN gets out

, takes Harold’s hand, and
crosses him across the big intersec
tion. The car has
followed, too, and now Warren jump
s back into the car and -

7 INT. CAR DAY

-

87
PICKS UP HIS BOOK: “IT’S OK TO RUN AWAY SOMETIMES”
C He reads to Sofia, who is driving.

WARREN
(reading)
It is essential at times to vali
date the
child’s feeling by going along
with his
attempts at independence, par
ticularly
when he feels overwhelmed by the
emotional events in the home
--

The car stops, Jarren jumps out --

88 EXT. STREET - DAY

88
WARREN AGAIN TAKES HAROLD’S HAND
AND CROSSES HIM across a
large intersection, READING TO
HAROLD FROM THE BOOK:

WARREN
(reads as he crosses Harold)
We all want to run away sometim
es. Daddy
wants to run away from the fill
in your
job here, oh, from the telepho
ne company,
(MORE)

C)
(COID) C
 64.
88 CONTINUED:
88
WARREN (cont’d)
Mommy wants to run away from her
work,
but it’s really by facing our fear
s that
we learn to enjoy life --

Warren jumps back into the car.

89 INT. CAR - DAY

89
Warren continues to read as Soni
a drives.

WARREN
(reads)
However, there comes the point when
it is
equally essential to put your foo
t down,
stop indulging the child’s reckless
shenanigans, and restore the ord
er which
children secretly crave -—

THE CAR STOPS AGAIN. Warren jumps out again.

90 EXT. STREET - DAY
90
Warren walks alongside Harold as
Harold moves down the
sidewalk at a fast clip.

WARREN
OK, Harold, this is your last chan
ce to
go peaceably back to the car.

Harold ignores him.

C WARREN
(continuing)
We’ve been doing this for over fort
y
minutes and I think we could all
stand to
get some dinner. Harold?
Harold ignores him, and keeps on walking.

WARREN
(continuing)
That’s it, you’re busted, pal.
Warren picks Harold up in his
arms Harold is kicking and
wiggling to get free.

HAROLD
I hate you! You’re terrible parents!

WARREN
(CARRYING HAROLD)
We love you, too, Harold, but now it’s
time to settle down --

C
C
 65.

91 INT. CAR
91
WARREN PUTS HAROLD INTO THE BACKSEAT

HAROLD
OF THE CAR.
C
(explodes)
I don’t care! He doesn’t listen. He’s a
show off! I don’t want to live with him.
He’s the devil!

SONIA
(SHOCKED)
The devil?!

WARREN
That’s it. You’ve got a time-out,
mister, starting right now.

Everyone in the car looks upset as War

ren drives. Suddenly,
Sonia winces.

SONIA
I think I just felt something.

WARREN
What do you mean you felt somethin
g?

SONIA
(winces)
A contraction.

C Oh,
WARREN
my God. Are you sure?

SONIA
(winces again.)
I’m sure. The baby’s coming.

Warren hits the breaks and makes a

turn.
Harold digs his thumbnail into his
crayon--

WARREN
OK. Hillsdale Road, the fastest way to
the hospital. No problem.
Harold reaches to the pouch behind
his mother’s seat and
angrily pulls out an open city map,
places it on top of the
pad on his lap (with the drawing of
the baby trapped in his
mother), arid draws an angry purple
slash across the map.

(CONTINUED)
 66.
91 CONTINUED:
91
SONIA
Hilisdale’s closed.

WARREN
(panicked)
What? Since when?

He confronts a DETOUR ROADBLOC

K and turns.

SONIA
(anxiuosly)
The second baby comes very fast
, Warren,
it won’t be a long labor--

WARREN
All right, all right --we’ll get there,
don’t worry. North Avenue’s the ticker -

He turns a corner fast.

Harold draws another PURPLE GASH

.

WARREN
(continuing)
For God’s sake——

SONIA
(moans)
Ohhhh.

WARREN
(turning angry)
I mean you pay your taxes.

SONIA
(moaning)
Don’t start --

WARREN
(continuing)
If they need to fix something,
then fix
it and get out of the way.

S ON IA
The baby’s coming-

He punches the accelerator; A TRUC

K READING “BILLY BURGER
GET A HAPPY CAP TODAY!” VEERS -

OUT OF THE WAY AND CRASHES INTO

A TALL HEDGE, DUMPING HAPPY CAPS
(GIVE AWAY EATS) ALL OVER.

(CONTINUED)

C
 67.
91 CONTINUED: (2) 91

WARREN
(SHOUTS)
Sorry!
( HAROLD SCRIBBLES ALL OR THE P which is now opened wide
--

and leaning against the window. Harold scribbles off the map
and onto the window in a mad rush of doodles.

WARREN
(screams)
Somebody please shoot me now!

He faces a huge gnarl of roads under construction.

Harold looks up innocently.

SONIA
Youre panicking, Warren.

-
WARREN
I am not panicking, I’m trying to get my
wife through the god-forsaken obstacle
course that my taxes pay for---

SONIA
(shouts)
I really don’t need this kind of stress
right now-- I want a calm leader--

WARREN
( (takes a breath
voice)
--lowers his

OK -- I am calmly leading where’s the

--

map?

SONIA
In the back--

WARREN
Give me the map, Harold.

He reaches back and grabs the map off Harold’s lap. leaving
him with only his DRAWING PAD THERE.

Harold, looks down, STUINED, when he sees his DRAWING: his

mother’s arms as been separated from her body to make an
OPENING and THE BABY’ S GONE.

WARREN
(continuing; looks at map of
scribbles)
Harold!

(CONTINUED)
0
 68.
91 CONTINUED: (3)
91

SONIA
Stop yelling!

WARREN
(yells)
This map is unusable -- and I am not
yelling!

HAROLD
(exclaims)
The baby got out!

WARREN
What the hell are you talking about?

SONIA
Stop cursing in front of Harold!

Warren grabs Harold’s pad -- but Harold hold on and pulls it

back--

HAROLD
I have to put the baby back inside.

WARREN
We are trying to get to the hospital so
the baby can come outside and besides,
--

have a time-out, and that means no

drawing.

SONIA
This is no time to fight with Harold --

WARREN
Sofia, will you et me handle this --

SONIA
OK, I’m sorry.

He yanks the pad away from Harold.

WARREN
Everyone cuiec-- We are going to the
hospital riaht now.

He throws the car in reverse -- drives backwards, looking

over his shoulder.

WARREN
(continuing)
I am in command.

(CONTINUED)
 69.
91 CONTINUED: (4) 91

Harold reaches forward and grabs a NEWSEK MAGAZINE from the

seat pouch.

Harold Dulls back the paper on the crayon and concentrates as

C
he uraentlv starts to draw his mother again his EYES ARE
--

FIERCE -- as we follow his hand--

PUSH IN:

92 ANIMATED HAROLD 92

MATCH DISSOLVE - OF ANIMATED HAROLD comoleting the re-drawing

of his mother.

The Baby bles up.

BABY
Why are you drawing that, Harold?

HAROLD
(fiercely)
I’m putting you away for good.

BABY
Why? I want to play with you!

HAROLD
You dont know how to play.

THE BABY STARTS RUNNING NEAR AND FAR, GIGGLING.

MATADOR

(walks up with Goat in tow)

Boys, please, let’s seet and discuss
thees in a civilized way--

Matador starts pulling parts from his torso-- he makes a

small table and starts to make two small chairs.

The Lion ROARS FURIOUSLY OFF SCREEN. Matador straightens with

fear.

MATADOR
(continuing)
Ave Maria, just what we need.

Lion drools as he approaches the baby -- who is giggling.

MATADOR
(continuing)
Come on, thees baby saved us in the
helicopter, man.

(CONTINUED)
 70.
92 CONTINUED: 92

LION EATS Matador to the side casually, and Matador lands in

a heao ON TOP OF THE TABLE HE HAS CONSTRUCTED which SHATTERS
APART.

LION
(STALKING BABY)
I don’t need any helicopters at the
moment.

MATADOR
(REASSHLES HIMSELF)
Do something to stop him, Harold --

Harold’s eyes open INNOCENTLY WIDE as he looks at Matador

over his shoulder.

HAROLD
Why?

MATADOR
Think how your parents would feel, your
mother, your father, i the baby were
lost forever --

HAROLD’S BROW PRESSES DOWN as he REALIZES MATADOR’S GOT A

POINT. ANVHILE LION OPENS WIDE NEAR THE BABY and PINS THE
BABY DOWN WITH ONE PAW, fl4OBILIZING AND QUIETING THE BABY --

CUT TO:

C’ INT. CAR - DAY 93

SONIA
Oh, no.

WARREN
What’s wrong?

SONIA
Everything stopped.

WARREN
Everything stopped?

SONIA
Something’s wrong --

CUT TO:

94 ANIMATED HAROLD 94

ANIMATED HAROLD, eyebrows pressed down, THINKING, as the LION

STARTS TO CLOSE HIS MOUTH OVER THE BABY --

(CONTINUED)
 71.
94 CONTINUED: 94

MATADOR
Harold!

HAROLD immediately DRAWS SPIRALS that FLOAT TOWARD LION and

start to hypnotize him.

LION FREEZES, aws open, drool dripping onto the baby.

MATADOR -

(continuing)
Gracias a dios.
(wipes his sweaty face with
his cape)
Let’s discuss our agenda for peace, love,
and understanding boys--

CUT TO:

— 95 INT. CAR 95
C fTh7 T
DLJL4

(smiles)
It’s OK. The baby’s OK.

WARREN
It’s OK?

SONIA
It’s OK.

C Warren sighs with relief as he DRIVES.

WARREN
LET’S JUST GET TO THE HOSPITAL.

CUT TO:

96 MATADOR 96

MATADOR Is REASSLING THE TABLE AS the animated baby

--

giggles and GRABS THE CRAYON HAROLD PULLS BACK -- IT’S A --

TUG OF WAR --

THE CRAYON BREAKS IN HALF - -

HAROLD
Give chat back to me--

The BABY JUMPS ONTO THE GOAT’S BACK, DRAWS A CROWN ON HIS OWN
HEAD, AND SLAPS THE GOAT ON THE BUTT --

(CONTINUED)
 72.
96 CONTINUED: 96

GOAT
Blaaa!

( THE GOAT TAKES OFF,

OVER HIM --
KNOCKING THE MATADOR DOWN AND TRAIIPLING

HAROLD
I told you to protect mv goat!

MATADOR
(STRUGGLES TO HIS FEET)
I was building the peace table--

Harold cuickly DRAWS A MUZZLE ON THE DROWSY LION’S MOUTH

decorates it with a sloppy smile-face, JUMPS ON THE LION’S
BACK and claps his hands really loud, snapping the lion out
of his trance.

HAROLD
Follow that goat!

Lion leaps into action, with Harold barely hanging on AND

RUNS AFTER THE GOAT AS IT:

CUT TO:

97 TENNIS PHOTOGRAPH 97

DIVES INTO A TENNIS PHOTOGRAPH STRETCHING AND BREAKING THE

NET LOOSE. PETE SAMPRAS AND ANDRE AGASSI LOOK SHOCKED:
Q PETE
(points to official with
raccuec)
Goat!

ANDRE
(points)
Running goat!

MATADOR RUNS THROUGH THE TENNIS COURT AFTER HAROLD, CARRYING

HIS LITTLE PEACE TABLE.

PETE
(AGITATED)
What’s with the matador table?

THE BABY AND GOAT JUMP ONTO ANOTHER PAGE AND:

CUT “0:

C
 73.

98 CAR ADVERTISNT 98

GALLOP INTO A CAR ADVERTISENT

C
--

THE MOVING SEDAN IN THE ;.D IS ROUNDING THE CURVE JUST AS THE
BABY HEADS INTO ITS PATH --

ROLD DRAWS A SSO AS HE RIDES THE ZION AND THROWS :T

AROUND THE GOAT’S BACK LEG --

AND JERKS THE GOAT TO A STOP, JUST AS THE CAR SWERVES OFF THE
PAGE TO AVOID THEX --

ONCE THE CAR HAS PASSED, THE BABY AND GOAD GALLOP ON-

DRAGGING HAROLD OFF THE LION AND ACROSS THE ROAD.

THE HUFFING AND PUFFING MATADOR RUNS ACROSS THE ROAD,

CARRYING HIS TABLE. —-

MATADOR
(out of breath)
Madre de dio, somebody draw me a priest--

CUT TO:

99 SMOKING JOINY CIGARETTE AD: 99

Smoking Johnny is enjoying a refreshing cigarette when the

CAR BURSTS THROUGH HIS CHEST, leaving a big hole of billowing
smoke and dust. Johnny coughs, shrugs and goes for another
drag when --

THE GOAT AND THE BABY, DRAGGING HAROLD BY HIS LASSO, CO

FLYING THOUGH THE HOLE. Johnny looks ao his cig and tosses
ic away.

CUT TO:

100 BAKED BEANS AD: 100

THE CAR CAREENS AND FISHTAILS ACROSS SO? TEXT BEFORE

SLAING INTO THE MOUNTAIN OF BAKED BEANS.

HAROLD SMACKS DOWN ON A NEARBY PORTION OF TEXT.

He looks up to see the Baby and the Goac LEAP OVER HIM. The
Goat lands and gallops away, YANKING Harold and the rope
after them.

CUT TO:

C
 74.

101 PHOTO OF CHER 101

The Goat leaps over the Dhoto of CHER. Harold skids ACROSS
CHER’S CHEEK AND GEABS :-ER LOWER LIP.

CHER WINCES IN PAIN AS ThE LARIAT ON THE c-OAT’ S BACK LEG IS

PULLED TIGHT AND --

THE GOAT SNAPS IN HALF -- SENDING THE FRONT HALF FLYING INTO
THE NEXT PAGE.

CUT TO:

102 AIR CONDITIONING AD: 102

THREE GIRLS AT A SLUER PART ARE ENJOYING THE AIR

CONDITIONING WHEN --

THE GOAT’S HEAD BURSTS ThROUGH THE WALL lands on the

--

floor. The girls at slurnber part SCREAM--

GIRL ONE
Air conditioning so comfortable!

GIRL TWO
Goat head!

GIRL THREE
Comfortable Goat head! Cool and
refreshing!

CUT BACK TO:

133 CHERS FACE 103

THE BABY DEAWS A BIGGER, MORE FRIGHTENINGLY POWERFUL FRONT

HALF TO THE GOAT, WHEN - -

HAROLD’S ARM POPS OUT OF CHER’S MOUTH AS HE STRUGGLES TO FREE

HIMSELF, CHER SPITS HAROLD OUT HE FLIES THROUGH THE AIR
--

AND--

CUT TO:

104 AIR CONDITIONING AD 104

SMASHES THROUGH THE WALL :NTO THE SLUER ?ARTY - -

HAROLD sees the GOAT’S HEAD ON THE FLOOR and FALLS TO HIS
EES, PISiNG HIS FISTS TO THE HEAVENS N A CRY OF ANGUISH.

(CONTINUED)
 75.
104 CONTINUED: 104

HAROLD
Nooooocoooo

The GIRLS START CRYING.

GIRL ONE
(crying)
Air conditioning so cool.

GIRL ‘JO
(sobbing)
Comfortable and refreshing!

THE BABY BURSTS INTO THE SLUER PARTY NOW, RIDING HIS
BIGGER, MUSCULAR GOAT WITH BIGGER HORNS. HE RIDES OUT AND
LEAVES HAROLD SCREAMING.

HAROLD
St000pp!

LION BURSTS IN AND LANDS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE SLUER PARTY,

HIS MANE FLAT AND WET.

Harold angrily TEARS THE MUZZLE OFF THE LION’S MOUTH and
JUMPS ONTO HIS BACK.

HAROLD
(continuing)
Lets go eat the baby!

The Lion roars mightily, shakes his wet mane back to

fullness, and BOUNDS out of the slumber party.

The girls are SOBBING, WEEN MATADOR TIP TOES THROUGH WITH HIS
LITTLE TABLE.

MATADOR
(tip toes through with his
little table)
Excuse me, ladies sorry to disturb you.

GIRL THREE
Nice man has air conditioning!

GIRL O
(smiling, takes Matadors hat
off)
So comfortable!

MATADOR
May : have my hat?

(CONTINUED)

C
 76.
104 CONTiNUED: (2) 104

GIRL ONE
Comfortable table! 1-landsome man!

THEY SURROUND HIM, and fawn over him.

\: MATADOR
Please, rnuchachas, the air is nice and
cool here, but I have important business-

CUT TO:

105 INT. MOMS KITCHEN AD 105

A long spread of kitchen table filled with canisters of

flower, sugar, and spices.

The Goat leans into a bowl of rice and is eating. The Baby
is still on the goat, patting its neck.

Harold and his Lion SNEAK past salt and Deoper shakers and
creep up behind the Baby and Goat, stalking their prey.

CHOMP! The Lion LUNGES and BITES the goat’s hindquarters.

The Goat WAILS in pain.

THE GOAT AND LION BEGIN TO TANGLE. They fall of f morn’s

kitchen table, out of the photo and SLIDE DOWN THE TEXT.

CUT TO:

106 NT. SOPHISTICATED MAN SCOTCH AD 106

A Sophisticated Man is ordering a drink from the bartender.

Above a neaQilne reaDs: “DICKLE ScCCH COTTA LOVE HAT
-

DICKLE”

CEASH!

Harold, Baby, Lion and Goat come smashing through the

ceiling. The Sophisticated Man flies as the Goat butts him
in the rear.

SOPHISTICATED MAN
(rnmed by goat)
Dickle!

The crowd is slammed by Lion, knocking over tables and

chairs.

(CONTINUED)
 77.
106 CONTiNUED:
106

CROWD
Gotta love that Dickle!

C BOUNCERS THROW HAROLD, LION, BABY AND GOAT OUT OF THE BAR.

People re-compose themselves and RAISE THEIR GLASSES TO

TOAST-- when MATADOR COS IN, HAVING BEEN !ADE UP LIKE A
GIRL AT THE SLUER PARTY, WITH A NIGHTIE AND PIGTAILS.

Sophisticated Man puts a glass of Dickle in his hand.

They all toast.

BAR CROWD
Dickle!

Dazed Matador nods and drinks.

CUT TO:
107 EXT. MAGAZINE PHOTO OF SNOW-CAPPED MOUNTAINS DAY
-
107
Harold and Baby FLY THROUGH THE AIR, THROUGH MOUNTAINS, and
land in soft snow on a rocky plateau.

THE TWO CREATURES BATTLE IN THE BACKGROUND, SCRATCHING,

BITING, ROARING, WHILE --

IN THE FOREGROUND, HAROLD AND THE BABY FACE EACH OTHER --

(Th HAROLD
I gave you a chance and you blew it.

BABY
(giggles)
need a chance.

HAROLD
7hat are you talking about? I had a good
life before you showed up.

BABY
So did I.

HAROLD
Then disappear.

BABY
Somebody has to show you how to draw.

(CONTINUED)

C
 78.
:07 CONTINUED: 107

HAROLD
I hate you.

C No!
BABY

HAROLD
Yes! I wish you were dead!

The baby looks hurt.

BABY
Really?

THE GOAT AND THE LION SUDDENLY MORPH INTO ONE TERRIFYING
MONSTER WITH A LION FACE WHICH --

SWOOPS DOWN OUT OF THE SKY, GRES THE BABY, AND JETS BACK UP
INTO THE AIR.

THE BLUE SKY RIPS OPEN LIKE A PAPER BAG AS THE MONSTER WITH
THE BABY GO THROUGH THE NEXT PAGE --

Harold looks scared.

HE CLIMBS THROUGH THE TOFN HOLE AND SEES WHAT IS ON THE NEXT
PAGE.

FIRST we see the panic in Harold’s eyes, then we see what he

sees:

CUT TO:

108 MARS MISSION IN SPACE SPREAD 108

A two page spread of the MARS MISSION IN SPACE. Tilt up to

the Monster with the Baby flying right towards it.

THE MONSTER SLAI4S INTO the Mars Mission spaceship, damaging,

its antenna, sending off SPARKS.

THE SPACESHIP CAREENS OFF COURSE, leaving Harold alone,

peering over the edge helplessly as the monster and the ship
move farther and farther away.

MATADOR ARRIVES, breathless. Swaying.

MATADOR
(DRUN(ENLY)
Harold, where is the baby?

HAROLD LOOKS UP, AND SO DOES MATADOR.

(CONTINUED)
 79.
108
108 CONTINUED:

BABY
(VO, still echoing)
Help! Haaarrroooid! Hellillip!

MATADOR
(BURPS)
Draw a rocket, Harold, auickly..

HAROLD
I’m all out of crayon.

MATADOR
(SWAYS)
Use me.

HAROLD
No!

MATADOR
I want to bea hero, lets go.

AND HE IS
MATADOR DECONSTRUCTS HIMSELF INTO A BIG CROSS BOW,
THE ARROW WITH HIS HEAD AT THE TIP.

MATADOR
(continuing)
Fire me into space, Harold.

HAROLD
I can’t--
(
MATADOR
We cannot let the baby perish, think of
your parents iickly-
--

Harold looks at him, his BROW pressing down again.

He steps up and DFWS THE BOW BACK, PREPARING TO SHOOT THE

MATADOR INTO SPACE.

HAROLD
Good luck.

MATADOR
Thank you, my fried. If all goes well, :
will see you very soon. If not, grow up
to be a brave boy and think of me --

HAROLD RELEASES T2E BOW. MATADOR SHOOTS NTO SPACE AS SEEN

IN THE PHOTO HAROLD watches, hoping.
--

OF HIS
BUT AS MATADOR SPEEDS TOWARD THE SPACESHIP, THE LNES
ONLY HIS
BODY UNRAVEL AND SCATTER TO THE SOLAR WINDS, UNTIL

(CONTINUED)
 80.

108 CONTINUED: (2) 108

HEAD IS STILL ON COURSE BUT IT i’!ISSES ThE SPACESHIP AT THE

--

LAST SECOND, AND FLIES INTO THE VOID OF SPACE --

C MATADOR
(continuing; Fading away)
Sorry, Haroi1llddd

Harold stares up into space, shocked. He is all alone.

CUT TO:

109 INT. CAR - DAY 109

THE LIVE ACTION HAROLD looks down at the magazine page. The
spaceship that was there is now gone. Harold is freaked out,
both lonely and scared. He looks up at the back of his moms
head. SONIA LOOKS SCARED AS SHE HOLD HER STOMACH.

WARREN
What’s wrong?

SONIA
It stopped.

WARREN
You said that before.

SONIA
No, it really stopped this time.
Something’s wrong, I can tell, the baby
doesn’t feel right.

Warren hits the gas and takes a corner fast.

On he RADIO:

NEWS OF THE
MISSION
(V.0.)
We interrupt this broadcast with
disturbing news from the Mission to Mars.
After passing through the asteroid belt,
communications with the Endeavor has been
cut off. Our latest report from Cape
Canaveral.

NASA OFFICIAL
We think the antenna on the outside of
the spaceship was damaged and we’ve lost
communIcation with the snip. The
astronauts are still in their sleep
chambers, and they cant wake u until we
activate the controls on their sleep
chambers from here.

(CONTINUED)
 81.

109 CONTINUED: 109

Harold CO\RS HIS FACE WITH BOTH HANDS as :— hears this news.

.10 INT. HOSPIT CORRIDOR - DAY 110

HAROLD LOOKS SCARED AS HE WALKS DOWN THE HALL BRISKLY with

his FATHER alongside the gurney bearing SONIA.

At the end of the hail, SONIA is taker. intD a room and THE
CURTAIN IS PULLED.

A doctor sters into Warren and Harold’s rath and stops them.

WARREN
Cant we go in there?

DOCTOR
Does your wife have a heart condition?

WARREN
Does my wife have a heart condition?
What are you talking about?

DOCTOR
I dont want to panic you --

WARREN
Does my wife have a heart condition?

DOCTOR
There’s a remote possibility that she’s
O exoeriencing heart failure of some kind -

WARREN

HAROLD LISTENS, WIDE-EYED, and turns to a :EARBY ‘IV which

reads: MARS MISSION DISASTER.

DOCTOR
It’s only a remote possibility, but her
blood pressure is dangerously ow and we
want to rule out heart trouble as iickiy
as we can.

WARREN
(SCARED)
Yes, let’s rule it out right away.

DOCTOR
Were running some tests, it should take
two to three hours.

(CONTINUED)
 82.
1:0 CONTINUED: 110

I want. to be with her.

C’ DOCTOR
We need to run the tests, and she needs
to be undisturbed, I’m sorry.

WARREN
I don care, : want to be there.

WARREN LOOKS AT HIM. The doctor looks from Warren’s worried

face, to Harold’s worried face.

DOCTOR
Look, if she has no history of heart
trouble, I’m sure it’s going to be fine.
(HE LEANS IN AND WHISPERS TO
WARREN)
We don’t want to scare your son, so why
don’t you take him to get some dinner,
and I’ll call you when the tests are
done, OK?

Warren looks down at Harold, who is lookinc up at him,

WORRIED.

CUT TO:

i1 INT. BILLY BURGER - NIGHT 111

C Warren and Harold sit in a booth at a tica1 fast food

chain. Warren pushes his UNEATEN burger away, next to
Harold’s uneaten burger.

WARREN
I don: feel :ike eating, either.

HAROLD’S FACE :s NOT VISIBLE, as he rests his forehead on the

edge of the table and stares into his lap.

FOLD
I’m sorry my drawing made so much
trouble, Daddy.

WARREN
Your drawings didn’t cause this trouble.

HAROLD
made the baby co away, and I made Mommy
sick.

Warren reaches across and puts a hand on Harold’s shoulder as

Harold stares into his own lap.

(CONTINUED)
 83.
ill CONTINUED: 111

WARREN
Even if you don’t want. the baby to come,
it wouJafl’ stop Mom :rom riaving the
baby, understand?

:ROLD LOOKS AT HIS FATHER with tears in his eyes.

WARREN
(continuing)
And even if I want the babv,t doesn’t
guarantee that Mom and the baby will be
OK. That’s not how life works.

WARREN STARES AT F.ROLD A MONT, emotion in both of their

eyes.

WARREN
(continuing)
Your drawings are wonderful, Harold. I
wouldnt give thn up for anything, and
neither would your mother.

Harold takes this in.

WARREN
(continuing)
In fact, I think it would be great if you
made some drawings right now that we
could take to Mom in the hospital.

(_ ROLD
Right here?

WARREN
Yeah, riaht here.

ROLD LOOKS AROUND at the relatively empty fast food place.

WARREN
(continuing)
Take a whole booth and spread out.

CUT TO:

112 TWO EOTH TABLES 112

PAN OF TWO EOOTH TABLES COVERED WITH DRAWINGS, arriving at

HAROLD, WHO LOOKS FRUSTRATED.

CUT TO:
 84.

113 HAROLD’S DRAWING

113
Close uD:

C Harold draws a porcupine with a red crayon. Nothing hapDens.

CUT TO:
114 HAROLD 114
Harold looks frustrated.

CUT TO:
115 DRAWING 115
Close Up:

He draws a red moose. Waits nothing haptens.

CUT TO:
116 DRAWING 116
CLOSE UP: He pulls out a blue crayon and holds it carefully
OVER THE DRAWING OF THE MOOSE, then SUDDENLY PLUNGES THE BLUE
CRAYON DOWN TO THE PAPER AND STARTS SCRIBBLING VIOLENTLY.

CUT TO:

C 117 HAROLD’S EYES

CLOSE UP:
117

HAROLD’S FIERCE EYES as HE SCRIBBLES N A RAGE.

CUT TO:
118 HAROLD 118
HAROLD THROWS THE CRAYON DOWN IN DISGUST, and sits back in
the booth, exhausted. Then suddenly he notices something in
the scribbles.

He looks closer.

CUT TO:
119 DRAWING 119
intersection between red and blue, hats . . . PURPLE.
He puts his finger on it. His EYES LIGHT UP.

CUT TO:

C
 85.

120 OLD 120

Harold walks through the fast food restaurant holding the red
( crayon in one hand and the blue crayon in the other.

HE PASSES WARREN, WHO Is TALKING ON THE PAY PHONE, WITH HIS

BACK TURNED.

WARREN
(ON PAY PHONE) —

I’m waiting to hear from the doctor, but

she seems OK, just a little tired --

Harold arrives at the counter, where A COUPLE OF PEOPLE ARE

PLACING ORDER and TWO TEENAGERS ARE FILLING THEN.

Harold takes a straw from the dispenser and walks behind the
counter, just as the teenagers backs are turned getting
burgers and shakes.

121 INT. BACKROOM OF BILLY BURGER - NIGHT 121

Harold walks by the TJCE OUT WINDOW, where a TEENAGER Is

LEANING OUT THE WINDOW FILLING AN ORDER. He then walks past
the open door of an OFFICE where AN OLDER :!ANAGER IS ON THE
PHONE; Harold passes just beneath the manaaer’s line of sight
as the manager looks through a glass window enclosing the
office. Harold walks under this window.

NAGER
(ON PHONE)
You screwed us on the Happy Caps, Phil,
we only got three hundred. Hey, : don’t
care if a truck crashed, we need Hay
Caps.

Harold finds an industrial-sized food processor on a counter

in the food prep area.

He PEELS THE RED CRAYON, then PEELS THE BLUE CRAYON. He

places them into the processor. THEN HE TURNS IT ON.

A teenage worker walks right behind him carrvina a huge stack

of wrapped burgers to go. He never sees Harold.

THE PROCESSOR STOPS. Harold looks inside and sees PURPLE

DUST.

THEN HAROLD RENERS SOMETHING. He goes back to the front

of the restaurant, passing the take out window and the office
again.

(CONTINUED)
 86.

:2: CONTINUED: 121

TEEN AT TAKE OUT

WINDOW
(HANDS OVER ORDER)
Jumbo fries, double cheese, triple wharnmv
shake.

MANAGER
(ON PHONE)
So give me seven hundred pounds of lard
and well call it even. ButThext time I
want Happy Caps for my customers,
understand?

Harold walks to the front of the restaurant, to his FATHER

TALKING ON THE PHONE --

WARREN
(ON PAY PHONE)
Hi, it’s Warren, yeah, she’s fine,
Harold, and I are having dinner, but the
doctor is concerned abut her blood
pressure-

HAROLD carefully pulls the CAR KEYS FROM WARREN’S JACKET

POCKET without WARREN noticing.

122 EXT. STREET - NIGHT 122

Harold exits the restaurant and goes to the car parked in

front, opens it, and gets in. He pulls the ICE SCRAPER from
the visor, and gets into the back seat, where he SCRAPES his
purple scribbles from the window (these were made when he
scribbled off the map and onto the window) He carefully
.

catches these on a piece of paper, folds it, and leaves the

car, locking it behind him.

He goes back into the restaurant.

:23 NT. BILLY BURGER - NIGHT 123

Harold passes his father CHATTING ON THE PHONE and slips

behind the counter, past the oblivious teen working there.
HE PASSES THE UNMANNED TAKE OUT WINDOW, and a DRIVER CALLS
OUT TO HIM.

DRIVER
Hey, excuse me -—

Harold stops and goes to the window.

(CONTINUED)
 87.
123 CONTINUED: 123

DRIVER
(continuing)
We didnt gec our special toy.

HAROLD
There’s no more Happy Caps.

Harold leaves the window.

DRIVERS WIFE
what hapened to the child labor laws in
this state?

CUT TO:

124 FOOD PREP AREA BACK COUNTER OF THE RESTAURANT 124

Harold passes another oblivious teen carring a HUGE TUB

LABELLED: FRYING LARD.”

He goes up to the food processor, unfolds his piece of paper

and carefully soills his purple shavings from the car window
into the processor.

HE TURNS IT ON AND REBLENDS THE MIX. Then picks up a nearby

metal tunnel, and pours the POWDERED CRAYON MIXTURE INTO THE
PLASTIC STRAW.

He kneels on the counter to put the straw into a microwave

oven on a shelf above the counter. He turns it on and
listens to the beeps of the timer.

He takes the scraw out, and sa-ueezes his PERFECT PURPLE

CRAYON FROM THE PLASTIC.

CUT TO:

125 INT. FRONT OF BILLY BURGER - NIGHT 125

CLOSE UP: Harold draws the moose. Then he draws a pie. The
moose eats the pie. HAROLD SMILES.

Now HAROLD DRAWS ‘HE BABY. But the baby does not move.

Push in to this drawing of the baby, and pan over to see

animated Harold, Icokina concerned.

HAROLD
Come on, baby, where are you?

He walks around the two-dimensional, lifeless baby.

(CONTINUED)
 88.
125 C0NT:NUED: 125

He touches the baby, but all it does is SMUDGE.

He starts to draw another baby. WE HEAR - TELEPHONE RINGING.

CUT TO:

:26 126
Warren talking on payphone --

WARREN
(ON PAY PHONE)
Whoa -that’s the doctor on tv cell phone
-- I gotta go --

He pulls his RINGING CELL PHONE FROM HIS JACKET POCKET.

WARREN
(INTO PHONE)
Hello? . How is she?
. . OK, well be
right over.

He jurnos up and goes over to Harold’s two booths of drawings.

There are TWO TABLES COVERED WITH DRAWINGS. NO sign of

HAROLD.

Warren looks around, WORRIED.

WARREN
C Harold!

He HEARS I-LOLD GROWL. And looks under the table.

Harold :s GROWLING at his DRAWING N FRUSTRATION as ne sits

under the table with his crayon in hand.

CUT TO:

127 WARREN’ S HEAD 127

upside-down, leaning over the table top to see Harold

underneath.

WARREN
Time to go, pal.
(Pats his pockets and toks
panicked)
Oh, no, where’s the car keys?
(He stands up, panicked

Harold’s hand appears from under the tabletop and slaps the
keys on the table, and Warren takes them relieved.

CUT TO:

C.
 128 INT. CAR - NIGHT 128

WIDE SHOT OF HAROLD IN THE BACK SEAT, as he tries to bring

the Baby drawing to life.

SUPERIMPOSED OVER THE TOP OF THIS LIVE ACTION SHOT are

HAROLD’S SIMPLE PURPLE LINE DRAWINGS, showing us what he’s
drawing and how frustrated he Is: one lifeless baby after
another is drawn.

The car stops. Warren simply opens the rear door, picks
Harold up, and takes him out of the car, while Harold is
still drawing on his pad.

CUT TO:

129 INT. HOSPITAL LOBBY - NIGHT 129

Harold and Warren walk towards the elevator. Harold is still

trying to draw on his pad.

SECURITY GUARD
NUDDLEMAN
We need you to sign in, sir.

WARREN TUENS TO SEE TWO SECURITY GUARDS playing cards.

NUDDLEMAN is skinny with a mustache. The other, named JIMt4Y,
is fat.

WARREN
() Sorry.
(WALKS BACK TO SIGN IN)

We dolly out from behind the desk to reveal Harold, walking

INTO THE ELEVATOR ALONE. The doors close, and no one
notices.

CUT TO:

130 INT. ELEVATOR - NIGHT 130

Harold stands in a corner of the elevator with a furrowed

brow, staring at his pad. He looks up and sees A POSTER:

CUT TO:

131 POSTER 131

Poster reads in big letters: “ASK A PRO .for the best

. .

hospitalization plan available today It’s the MEDI-CURE

--

Health Plan.”

CUT TO:

C,
 9U.

132 HAROLD 132

Harold turns, crayon in hand, and looks wide eyed at someone

else in the elevator.

HAROLD
(SURPRISED)
Commander Kramer --

Commander Kramer stands in the elevator in a purple crayon

animated incarnation.

COMMANDER KRAMER
Hi, Harold.

HAROLD
I cant find the baby.

COMMANDER KRAMER
There comes a time when you just have to
strap yourself to the rocket and go
. . .

get the baby.

She looks up at the floor counter. Harold takes this in.

The elevator stops.

COMMANDER KRAMER
(continuing)
This is your floor.

Harold gets out and watches the ELEVATOR DOORS CLOSE ON

COMMANDER KRAMER.

133 INT. HOSPITAL CORRIDOR - NIGHT 133

Harold walks down the corridor, looks in a room, and sees his
mother, SONIA, sleeping. He walks over to her, looks at her
face. THEN HE LOOKS AT THE BLINKING, BEEPING SCREEN THAT
READS: “FETAL MONITOR BABY’ S HEART RATE.”
--
It is beeping
VERY SLOWLY.

HAROLD looks out the window, and sees the moon in the sky.
He squints and the moon’s face comes into focus, and raises
his eyebrows as if to say: “Well?” Harold turns to his
mother.

HAROLD
Bye, Mom. I hope I see you soon.

CUT TO:

C
 91.

S 134 INTO. HOSPITAL LOBBY - NIGHT 134

Warren looks around the elevator area and cannot find Harold.
He goes back to the two security guards.

SECURITY GUARD
NUDDLEMAN
(over enunciates his words)
The European tactical approach, Jimmy,
woulda been to lead with a face card.
You gotta think or I’m gonna destroy you
here.

WARREN
Did you see the little boy who came in
with me?

SECURITY GUARD
NUDDLEMAN
I didn’t realize you caineinwith a kid,
sir.

SECURITY GUARD
JIMMY
Not very good security technique,
Nuddleman.

SECURITY GUARD
NUDDLEMAN
Did you see him?

C SECURITY GUARD
JI?
Sure, a bald kid with a pad and a crayon,
right?

WARREN
That’s him.

SECURITY GUARD
JIMMY
He took the elevator up.

Warren runs to the elevators.

SECURITY GUARD
NUDDLEMAN
Unsupervised children are not allowed on
the premises, Supercop. C’de seven,
section eleven.

(CONTINUED)

C
 92.
134 CONTINUED: 134

SECURITY GUARD
JIY
How come every time you name a code and
section it’s ‘seven/eleven’?

SECURITY GUARD
NUDDLEMAN
I don’t know what you’re talking about.

SECURITY GUARD
JIIY
I’ll tell you why -- its because you
spend half your shift down there drinking
smoothies.

SECURITY GUARD
NUDDLEMAN
That’s a complete fabrication, Jimmy.

CUT TO:

135 INT. ELEVATOR — NIGHT 135

Warren gets into the elevator and sees a PURPLE CRAYON

DRAWING OF COANDER KRAMER ON THE WALL, but no sign of
Harold.

CUT TO:

136 INT. SOMEPLACE DARK 136

Harold lies on the floor in a dark, confined area. He slowly

brings the purple crayon down to the pad, and draws a window.
The window ANIMATES and reveals a moon. PUSH THROUGH THE
WINDOW, PAN DOWN FROM THE MOON, and see:

137 ANIMATED HAROLD 137

Animated Harold completing the drawing of a rocket.

Harold climbs onto the rocket, like a horse. Nothing

happens. He gets off, draws a sparkling fuse, and JUMPS BACK
ON JUST IN TIME.

THE ROCKET TAKES OFF, shoots across the page and SHATTERS THE
WINDOW, sending white paper glass everywhere noisily.
Through this HOLE IN THE PAPER, the REAL NIGHT SKY IS NOW
VISIBLE, along with the real MOON.

CUT TO:

C
 _, ._).

138 EXT. CITY SCAPE - NIGHT 138

The underside of the animated rocket leads us through the

city. BOOM UP to see LIVE ACTION HAROLD riding the CARTOON
ROCKET, which is out of control.
(1

It zips through tall buildings, speeds toward a DIP ‘EM

DONUTS BILLBOARD. Harold shuts his eyes tight as he SHOOTS
THROUGH THE DONUT HOLE.

He looks back and sighs with relief. BUT NOW HE’S HEADED
TOWARD A BILLY BURGER BLIMP floating in the night sky. He
ricochets off the blimp, KNOCKING A PIECE OF THE FUSELAGE
OFF, and shoots into a satellite dish, zings out of the dish,
and towards another rooftop.

CUT TO:

139 INT. SENIOR CITIZENS HOME - NIGHT 139

A night time melodrama plays on television. An OLD WOMAN

sits forward with anticipation as she watches TV with an OLD
MAN.

SUAVE TV ACTOR
(TO LARGE HAIR TV ACTRESS)
The reason I disappeared for eight years
without calling you was that I was --

THE TV SCRAMBLES TO ANOTHER STATION, and an ad for JOCK ITCH

MEDICATION: a diagram of a mans body with an arrow pointing
at his crotch.

COMMERCIAL VOICE
OVER
--itching right here.

The OLD MAN AND WOMAN LOOK AT EACH OTHER

CUT TO:

140 EXT. CITY BUILDING - NIGHT 140

Harold, still flying out of control, almost hits a big

ventilation unit.

He grabs a flagpole and zaps around the other way, right BACK
TOWARDS THE NURSING HOME WINDOW --

CUT TO:

C
141 INT. SENIOR CITIZENS HO - NIGHT 141

A nurse tries to fix the TV for the bewildered elderly

couple. OUTSIDE THE WINDOW, HAROLD SPEEDS DIRECTLY TOWARDS
THEN--

142 EXT. CITY BUILDING - NIGHT 142

Harold FRANTICALLY DRAWS CONTROLS FOR THE ROCKET, and at the

last possible second pulls the ROCKET AWAY FROM THE WINDOW,
jetting over the building and up into the night sky with
another sigh of relief. He steers the rocket left, then
right and then rockets straight up toward space. He’s got a
mission.

CUT TO:

143 INT. SONIA’S HOSPITAL ROOM - NIGHT 143

Warren opens the door and comes. He looks for Harold, sees
Sonia sleeping, and closes the window as the curtains blow in
the breeze.

The doctor comes in.

WARREN
How’s she doing?

DOCTOR
Her condition is guarded. We can almost
rule out heart failure, but her blood
pressure’s still very sluggish. It’s the
baby we’re worried about. Let’s hope
labor starts again soon, or we’ll have to
induce her. By the way, where’s your
boy?

Warren LOOKS ANXIOUS.

WARREN
(WHISPERS)
He disappeared somewhere in the hospital.

DOCTOR
(WHISPERS)
Did you talk to security?

WARREN
(WHISPERS)
Unfortunately, yes.

(CONTINUED)

C
 143 CONTINUED: 143

DOCTOR
Better try again. This is a heck of a
time to lose track of him.

C CUT TO:

144 EXT. UNIVERSE - NIGHT 144

Harold leaves the Earth’s atmosphere, and now he finds it

hard to breathe. So he draws a CLEAR SPACE HELT around his
head and breathes easily.

But now he is drifting in dark space and it’s scary. Earth

is very small behind him.

A bright glow spreads across the reflection in Harold’s

helmet. He looks up and smiles; rack focus to the reflection
on his helmet and see the smiling moon.

HAROLD
Which way to Mars?

CUT TO:

145 MOON 145

The smiling moon’s face turns away, and keeps rotating.

Harold flies around the moon to follow the face, which comes
to rest facing MARS, a red dot in the distance.

HAROLD
C Thanks.

He jets off toward Mars.

CUT TO:

146 INT. HOSPITAL LOBBY - NIGHT 146

NUDDLEMAN
He’s definitely in the building, because
he hasn’t left through this entrance, and
Hal on the east wind hasn’t seen him,
either.

Jfl’U4Y
We’ll have to do a floor by floor.

NUDDLEMAN
I’d say this situation calls for a floor
by floor.

(CONTINUED)
 9b.
146 CONTINUED: 146

JIMMY
I just said that.

A gurney is wheeled by with the man in the foam baby suit

(who was handing out free muffler and break job pamphlets
previously)

NUDDLEMAN
What happened to ?

PARAMEDIC
Something fell off a blimp and hit him in
the head.

PARAMEDIC #2
If it wasn’t for that big foam baby head,
he’d be dead.

NUDDLEMAN
(TO WARREN)
The guy would be dead, if it wasn’t for
that foam baby head.

JIMMY
(IRRITABLY)
He just said that.

WARREN
Listen, can we please concentrate on
finding Harold?

C CUT TO:

147 EXT. SPACE - NIGHT 147

Harold draws a TELESCOPE on the rocket as it jets along, and

peers through it..

CUT TO:

148 POV THROUGH TELESCOPE 148

Mars is magnified. But a HUGE ASTEROID ROLLS THROUGH THE

FRAME.

CUT TO:

149 HAROLD 149

Harold ducks in time, dropping the telescope. HE BOBS AND

WEAVES THE ROCKET through a RAIN OF ASTEROIDS. One is coming
directly toward him, and Harold makes the cone of the rocket
into a drill and quickly bores through the asteroid. The
storm of asteroids passes; he’s OK.

(CONTINUED)

C)
 97.
149 CONTINUED: 149

NOW HE IS NEXT TO MARS, which looms big and red, and he sees
the SPACESHIP for the MARS MISSION, HUGE compared to Harold’s
tiny rocket. Harold reaches up and RUNS HIS HAND ALONG THE
SPACESHIP. A HUGE SECTION OF MONSTER PASSES BEHIND HIM
C OMINOUSLY. Then he looks through a port hole and sees the
crew in their deep sleep chanibers. HE TAKES OUT HIS CRAYON
AND WRITES A NOTE ON THE WINDOW:

“DEAR ASTRONAUTS: I’m sorry the monster broke your

antenna, and I hope I can fix it. Good luck. Harold.”

Just as he finishes, we see as HUGE SHADOW LURKING BEHIND

HAROLD.

BABY
(OS)
Harold --

HAROLD CONES AROUND THE SHIP, and suddenly sees the BABY
FLOATING IN SPACE.

BABY
Harold!

HAROLD
Don’t worry, I’m coming

BABY
Wait, no --

C HAROLD
What’s wrong?

As Harold approaches the baby HE SEES A HUGE WET, POCK-MARKED

MOUTH CLOSING AROUND BOTH OF THEM. HE PULLS A QUICK U TURN
AND RACES TO GET OUT AS THE BIG, YELLOW-STAINED TEETH CLOSE.

BUT THIS TINE HAROLD DOESN’T MANAGE TO THREAD THE NEEDLE.

HE SQUEEZES HIS EYES SHUT AND BAILS AS THE ROCKET CRASHES

INTO AN UPPER TOOTH.

HAROLD FALLS INTO A GOOEY POCKET OF SALIVA BETWEEN LOWER GUN

AND POCK-MARKED CHEEK IT IS VERY DARK, WITH ONLY SLIPPERY
--

GLINTS OF LIGHT, AND HE IS VERY SCARED AS HE STRUGGLES TO

FREE HIMSELF FROM THE GOOEY SALIVA.

CUT TO:

150 EXT. LION HEAD MONSTER - SPACE 150

THE MONSTER WINCES, SHAKES HIS SNOUT, AND GROWLS -- AS HE

FLOATS IN SPACE.

CUT TO:
 98.

151 INT. LION HEAD MONSTER’S MOUTH - VERY DARK 151

THE MONSTER’S GROWLING AND BREATHING RULE AROUND HAROLD AS

HE STRUGGLES IN THE DARK SALIVA - -

HE FRANTICALLY DRAWS SOTHING AROUND HIS HEAD AND --

CLICK, Harold turns on a MINER’S HEADLAMP. Like an

underwater lamp, it doesn’t illuminate much except a few feet
in front of him.

But the baby is gone. And the surroundings are creepy:

gooey, textured, pockmarked flesh, and stained teeth.

HAROLD
(SCARED)
Baby? Where did you go?

HE STARTS SLOSHING THROUGH THE GOOEY THROUGH OF SALIVA, USING

ONE HAND TO LEAN ON THE WET, TEXTURED, THROBBING CHEEK NEXT
TO HIM AS HE WALKS BUT NOW THE LION’S TONGUE SLIDES AND
--

PUSHES HIM AROUND AND THE HUGE TEETH START CHOMPING THE ----

MONSTER IS TRYING TO EAT HAROLD.

CUT TO:

152 EXT. LION MONSTER 152

THE MONSTER MOVES his TONGUE around in his mouth and GNASHES
his teeth, trying to CHEW HAROLD UP.

- CUT TO:

153 INT. MONSTER’S MOUTH 153

CHAOS: HAROLD IS THROWN VIOLENTLY AROUND THE WET INTERIOR,

STRUGGLING TO AVOID THE SLITHERING TONGUE AND CRUNCHING
TEETH-

HAROLD
(SCREAMS)
HELLLLLLP!

CUT TO:

154 EXT. MONSTER 154

THE MONSTER FORCIBLY SWALLOWS SEVERAL TIMES

HAROLD
N00000 --

(CONTINUED)

C’
 99.
154 CONTINUED: 154

HE IS SUCKED BACK DOWN THE MONSTER S THROAT, AND GOES DOWN

the WET SHAFT --

HE LANDS IN BROWN/GREEN JUICES WITH A SPLASH --

SLIPS OFF ANOTHER SHELF AND DROPS DOWN -- HITS ANOTHER SHELF.
SLIPS OFF AND DROPS DOWN AGAIN --

SUDDENLY IT GETS VERY TIGHT AND NARROW --

TEXTURED WALLS OF THE INTESTINE CLOSE IN. BIG, THICK, WET

HAIRS ARE BRUSHING HAROLD DOWN, DOWN, SLIMING HIM, SMOTHERING
HIM HE SQUEEZES HIS EYES SHUT
-- --

WHAM! HE LANDS ON HIS BACK IN A PUDDLE OF BROWN/GREEN GOO ON

TOP OF A PALE, FLESHY FLOOR --

CUT TO:

155 INT. SONIA’S HOSPITAL ROOM NIGHT 155

THE DOCTOR LOOKS UPSET AS HE WATCHES THE FETAL MONITOR BEEP

EVEN MORE SLOWLY --

SCARED DOCTOR
What’s going on with her blood pressure?
Get me an I.V. right away come on,--

fast!

TWO NURSES JUMP INTO ACTION.

SONIA LIES WITH HER EYES CLOSED, BREATHING FAST.

CUT TO:

156 INT. HOSPITAL BASEMENT - NIGHT 156

WARREN AND SECURITY GUARD NUDDLEMAN WALK DOWN A DIM CORRIDOR

WITH A FLASH LIGHT, PAST BOILER ROOMS --

WARREN
If we don’t find him soon, we’re going to
have to call the police.

NUDDLEMAN
I think I have to agree with you.

WARREN
Let’s split up. You go down that way,
I’ll go this way.

CUT TO:
 100.

157 EXT. MONSTER - SPACE 157

THE MONSTER MAKES A VERY ANGRY, CONCENTRATED, FOCUSSED FACE -

— HE IS WORKING SOME KIND OF INTERNAL POWER, BREATHING IN A

RHYTHM, WITH A SHARP, DEMONIC LIGHT IN HIS EYES --

CUT TO:

158 INT. MONTSER’S STOMACH 158

HAROLD LIES ON HIS BACK, seemingly UNCONSCIOUS, in the goopy

stomach with wet, BREATHING, textured walls. THE BREATHING
IS LOUD AND RHYTHMIC, THE HEARTBEAT IS BOOMING.

HAROLD WAKES UP, DAZED, SOAKED, SCARED.

He sees a SOFT, THROBBING GREEN/YELLOW LIGHT SEEPING THROUGH

A BREATHING, HORIZONTAL SLIT-LIKE ORIFICE --

HE SWIMS TOWARD IT, AND SQUEEZES HIMSELF THROUGH --

HE CRAWLS INTO A WET, DIM, STOMACH-LIKE, YELLOW/GREEN ROOM

that is breathing.

It is CLUTTERED IN A MESSY WAY and he bends to pick something

up -- IT’S A --

WEIRD PURPLE CRAYON. LARGER THAN NORMAL, IT IS CURVY AND

WARPED, LIKE A WOBBLY LINE.

C HAROLD LOOKS DOWN AND SEES THAT THESE WEIRD PURPLE CRAYONS
ARE ALL OVER THE WET FLOOR OF THIS STOMACH ROOM AS THE --

MONSTER’S HEARTBEAT CONTINUES TO THROB AND THE WALLS CONTINUE

TO BREATHE. THE GREEN-YELLOW LIGHT FLICKERS LIKE A FURNACE
IN THIS DIM ROOM.

HAROLD NOW PICKS UP A SOAKING WET BOARD?

-- NO, IT’S A BIG
DRAWING PAD, SOAKED IN YELLOW JUICE. THESE ARE ALSO ALL
OVER, LIKE BIG, FALLEN CEILING TILES. MANY ARE PLASTERED
AGAINST THE WALLS, WHICH ARE CURVY AND DEEPLY TEXTURED.

HAROLD WALKS TO THE TEXTURED WALL, WITH MANY PROTRUSIONS, AND

SEES, NEXT TO THE WET PADS PLASTERED EVERYWHERE, PLATES
RESTING ON THE FLESHY, SHELF-LIKE PROTRUSIONS, PLATES WITH --

HE PICKS UP A DRIPPING STALK OF BROCCOLI IN GOO. SEES THAT

THIS BROCCOLI IS ALSO EVERYWHERE. He looks around,
disoriented.

HAROLD
(SHOUTS)
Hey! What’s going on?

CUT TO:
 .LWL.

159 INT. HOSPITAL EASEMENT - NIGHT 159

WARREN WALKS WITH A FLASHLIGHT THROUGH A DARK BOILER ROOM --

HISSING AND THROBBING WITH STEAM PIPES --

HE HEARS A YELP LIKE A CAT,

- OR A CHILD -- THEN A DOOR
JIGGLING --HE WHIPS AROUND --

WARREN
Harold?

WARREN WALKS SLOWLY TOWARD A SMALL DOOR THAT IS JIGGING --

WARREN
(continuing)
Are you trapped, Harold?

HE SLOWLY REACHES FOR THE KNOB, when the DOOR POPS OPEN, AND
WARREN IS SHOT IN THE FACE WITH WHITE FOAM --

WARREN
(continuing)
YAHHHHHH- -

THE FOAM STOPS AND WARREN IS COVERED. HE SEES NUDDLEMAN

SHOOTING A FIRE EXTINGUISHER INTO A SMOKING TRASH CAN.

NUDDLEMAN
Good thing we caine down here. Somebody
put a lit cigarette butt in this can of
garbage.
C CUT TO:

160 INT. SONIAS HOSPITAL ROOM - NIGHT 160

AN I.V. IS JABBED INTO SONIA’S ARM, NURSES HURRY ABOUT, THE

DOCTOR LOOKS VERY FOCUSSED.

DOCTOR
(SNAPS)
What’s the number?

NURSE
Ninety over sixty --

DOCTOR
That baby’s heartbeat is getting awfully
weak --

CUT TO:
 161 INT. BOILER ROOM - NIGHT 161

WARREN WIPES FOAM OFF HIS HAIR AND FACE as NUDDLEMAN TALKS.

NUDDLEMAN
Was the kid always bald like that?

WARREN
Yeah, his hair never really grew in.

NUDDLEMAN
You can tell he’s a special kid. And I
shudder to think of the price a kidnapper
could get for him on the open market. On
the other hand, his drawings might become
more valuable, too, if he disappeared.
But my intuition tells me, and
intuition’s a big part of my business --

WARREN
I think it’s time to call the police.

NUDDLEMAN
You took the words right outta my mouth.

CUT TO:

162 EXT. MONSTER IN SPACE 162

THE MONSTER CONTINUES TO CONCENTRATE, WORKING HIS INNER

VOODOO EVEN HARDER, BARING HIS TEETH AS HE TAKES IT TO
ANOTHER LEVEL - -

163 INT. MONSTER’S STOMACH 163

HAROLD TRIES TO DRAW THE BABY WITH ONE OF THE WET CRAYONS ON
ONE OF THE WET PADS --

BUT THE DRAWING OF THE BABY TURNS INTO A DRAWING OF HAROLD.

HE DOES IT AGAIN, AND THE SANE THING HAPPENS.

He draws many babies quickly and they all turn into HAROLDS,
surround him, AND THESE HAROLDS, IN TURN, START TO DRAW STILL
MORE HAROLDS, UNTIL THE ROOM IS COVERED IN MULTIPLYING
HAROLDS.

This multitude of ANGRY HAROLDS now animates fully and starts

to close in on the real Harold, as they continue to multiply.

HAROLD
(TRULY TERRIFIED)
Stop!

(CONTINUED)

C;
 ±U.3.
163 CONTINUED: 163

He is drowning in Harolds, which continue to pile up, buoying

him towards the ceiling, as he slips under, then manages to
buoy up again. He looks terrified.

C HAROLD
(SHRIEKS)
Help! Somebody help me! Help me get
out!

A SMALL HAND TEARS THROUGH A SLIT—LIKE OPENING JUST ABOVE

HAROLD, and GRABS HAROLD’S HAND. HE IS YANKED UP THROUGH THE
OPENING --

164 INT. STOMACH CORRIDOR 164

AND FINDS HIMSELF IN A PURPLISH, DIM, BREATHING, TEXTURED,

WET CORRIDOR RESEMBLING THE HOSPITAL, ECHOING WITH THE SLOW
BEEPS OF THE FETAL MONITOR -—

THE BABY HAS YANKED HAROLD UP TO SAFETY—AND THEY STAND

LOOKING AT EACH OTHER --

HAROLD
(LOOKS AT THE BABY)
Thanks.

SUDDENLY THE MULTITUDE OF HAROLD COPIES COMBS POURING THROUGH

THE OPENING ON THE FLOOR --

HAROLD DRAWS his steady little porcupine on THE WET WALL.

The smiling porcupine climbs and Harold draws a leash that he
hangs on to, along with the baby, and they are towed UP, AND
INTO A BIG GUSHING TUBE OF RED-PURPLE BLOOD --

CUT TO:

165 INT. MAIN ARTERY 165

HAROLD AND THE BABY ARE SWEPT DOWN THE ARTERIAL TUBE BY A
RUSHING, PULSING TIDE OF PURPLE BLOOD --

HAROLD AND BABY

WHOOAAAAA!

HAROLD AN THE BABY DISAPPEAR DOWN THE BIG ARTERIAL TUBE, BUT
THE PORCUPINE LATCHES ONTO THE ARTERIAL WALL AND TEARS
THROUGH.

The ARTERY RUMBLES LIKE AN EARTHQUAKE AS THE MONSTER ROARS IN

PAIN.

CUT TO:
 104.

166 EXT. SPACE - NIGHT 166

THE MONSTER GRIMACES AND P7ISTS IN PAIN, GRABBING HIS SIDE AS

THE PORCUPINE FLOATS OUT OF HIM AND INTO SPACE, SMILING.

CUT TO:

167 INT. CORRIDOR OF HOSPITAL - NIGHT 167

WARREN RUNS DOWN THE HALL WITH JflY AND A SWAT TEAM.

NURSES AND ORDERLIES JUMP OUT OF THE WAY.

WARREN
Why did you call a SWAT team?

JASON
I got two first cousins in the squad.
They owe me a favor.

CUT TO:

168 SWAT TEAM 168

as they RACE DOWN A FLIGHT OF STAIRS.

CUT TO:

169 EXT. STREET OUTSIDE HOSPITAL - NIGHT 169

C Warren, with foam still over much of his clothing, jogs the
streets with several SWAT cops, who duck into restaurants and
all-night markets as they go.

CUT TO:

170 INT. SONIA’S HOSPITAL ROOM - NIGHT 170

The fetal heart monitor BEEPS VERY WEAKLY. The doctor looks
worried. SONIA LOOKS UP, worries.

SONIA
What’s going on?

DOCTOR
We’re going to go to a C- section, but I
want to get your blood pressure up a
little higher, first.

SONIA
Where’s Harold?

(CONTINUED)

C
 105.
170 CONTINUED: 170

DOCTOR
He’s uh, with your husband, of course --

CUT TO:
C
171 INT. MONSTER 171

HAROLD AND THE BABY RIDE THE WAVE OF BLOOD DOWN THE ARTERY
and are DUMPED INTO A CHAMBER OF THE MONSTER’S HEART. WHICH
IS THUNDERING ALL AROUND THEM IN A REGULAR RHYTHM.

HAROLD DRAWS HEADPHONES TO COVER THEIR EARS from the NOISE.

The Baby lies on the floor. The beeps of the fetal heart
monitor are very slow.

BABY
I’m so tired.

HAROLD
(SHOUTS OVER HEARTBEAT)
Don’t give up. I’m gonna get us both out
of here and back home.

BABY
Just leave me here.

HAROLD
(SHOUTS)
I’ve got to think.

0 HAROLD SITS DOWN WEARILY ON WHAT LOOKS LI A FLESHY

PROTRUSION of the breathing walls.

The dark fleshy bulb Harold has sat on suddenly turns and it
is the Matador’s head.

MATADOR
Think of taking me with you, my fried.

HAROLD
Matador!

MATADOR
It warms my heart to see you boys working
together so peacefully. Now give me some
rope and toss me up that vein --

HAROLD DRAWS A ROPE TO MATADOR’S HEAD, AND TOSSES HIM, LiKE A

GRAPPLING HOOD, UP A GIB ARTERY.

MATADOR FLIES UP AND GRABS ONTO THE ARTERY WITH HIS TEETH.

(CONTINUED)

C
 I’JQ.

171 CONTINUED: 171

HAROLD GRABS THE BABY AND PULLS HIMSELF UP TO MATADOR, WHERE

THEY PUNCH THROUGH THE ARTERY AND FIND THEMSELVES IN ANOTHER
GOOEY CORRIDOR.

MATADOR
(continuing)
Now, draw me a body, quickly --

HAROLD BEGINS, BUT --

CUT TO:

172 EXT. MONSTER - SPACE 172

THE MONSTER, GRIMACING IN PAIN, PLUNGES A HAND INTO HIS SIDE

TO GET AT THE SOURCE OF HIS MISERY --

CUT TO:

173 INT. GOOEY CORRIDOR 173

THE MONSTER’S CLAWED HAND TEARS THROUGH THE WALL AND REACHES
FOR HAROLD, BABY AND MATADOR.

HAROLD GRABS THE BABY and the MATADOR’ S HEAD and RUNS DOWN
THE CORRIDOR WITH THE MONSTER’S CLAWED HAND IN HOT PURSUIT.

HAROLD, BABY,
MATADOR
(WILD-EYED WITH FEAR)

C CUT TO:

174 INT. MONSTER 174

HAROLD TURNS A CORNER DOWN A GOOEY INTESTINAL TUBE, WHEN THE

LION’S MONSTROUS HEAD BURSTS THROUGH AND PURSUES THEM DOWN
YET ANOTHER TUBE --

HAROLD, BABY,
MATADOR

CUT TO:

175 EXT. MONSTER - NIGHT 175

THE MONSTERS head and neck are bent over and buried in his
belly.

CUT TO:

C
 1U I

176 EXT. STREET - NIGHT 176

WARREN RUNS DOWN THE STREET FLANKED BY NUDDLEMAN, JIY, AND

A SWAT COP.

NUDDLEMAN
Let’s switch to a triangular search
formation.

WARREN’S CELL PHONE RINGS. PUSH IN DRAMATICALLY TO A CLOSE UP

OF WARREN AS HE STOPS RUNNING, PULLS OUT THE PHONE --

WARREN
(SWEATING, OUT OF BREATH)
Hello?

177 INT. SONIA’S HOSPITAL ROOM - EARLY MORNING 177

Pan from the weakly beeping fetal heart monitor to the

worried face of WARREN, as he looks at his—s-leeping wife, who
opens her eyes.

S ON IA
Were you here all night?

Warren nods affectionately.

SONIA
(continuing)
Did Harold go to school?

C No, he’s .
WARREN
. .around.

SONIA
What’s that white stuff all over you?

WARREN
Uh, shaving cream.

He strokes her head.

SONIA
Where’s Harold? I want to see him.

CUT TO:

178 INT. MONSTER 178

HAROLD
Waaaaa --

(CONTINUED)
 108.

178 CONTINUED: 178

He runs screaming to the end of the corridor, where the

Lions head corners him.

LION
(GNARLS)
Leave the baby.

HAROLD
I have to bring him home.

LION
But you don’t really want him.

HAROLD
Oh, yes, I really, really want him.

BABY
You don’t really, really want me.

HAROLD
OK, maybe I don’t really , really want
you, but I want you enough to be your
brother.

THE MONSTER OPENS WIDE AND SNAPS -- JUST MISSING THEM AS THEY
FLEE --

MATADOR
Do something!

C HAROLD DROPS TO THE FLOOR AND GOES TO WORK with his crayon.
BOOM UP TO SEE THOUSANDS OF PORCUPINES CROWDING THE FLOOR.

BABY
That’s it? What’s that gonna do?

THEY RISE LIKE A TIDE AND HAROLD DRAWS HIS BOAT ON THE WALL
AS THEY RISE. He gets into the boat with the baby and the
Matador’s head.

MONSTER-LION’S HEAD COMES AROUND THE CORNER AND SNAPS AT THEM

AND THEN HE LOOKS SHOCKS WITH PAIN
-- --

CUT TO:

179 EXT. SPACE 179

The monster pulls his face and hand out of his side, and they
are both COVERED WITH PORCUPINES. A DEEP RUMBLE COMES UP
FROM INSIDE HIM and A WAVE OF PORCUPINES BURSTS OUT OF THE
MONSTER’S MOUTH.

(CONTINUED)

C
 iU9.

179 CONTINUED: 179

THE MONSTER SPITS VIOLENTLY, and HAROLD in his BOAT, with

Baby and Matador, COMES FLYING OUT.

Harold’s boat flies through space and ricochets off the

satellite dish of the spaceship.

CUT TO:

180 INT. NASA CONTROL ROOM - DAY 180

A GREAT CHEER EXPLODES from the crowded NASA floor as A BIG

SCRAMBLED TV SCREEN OVER THE CONTROL ROOM SUDDENLY GIVES A
SHARP IMAGE OF THE INTERIOR OF THE SPACE CRAFT.

NASA OFFICIAL
(SHOUTS)
We’re back on line!

CUT TO:

181 INT. CLASSROOM - DAY 181

KIDS BURST INTO CHEERS, including Jason, Ruth, and Leo, as

they watch the MISSION ON TV.

TV AIiNOUNCER
(SHOUTS)
Communication with Endeavor has been
restored, repeat, communication has been
restored!

CUT TO:

182 INT. SPACESHIP 182

THE SLEEP CHAMBERS OPEN AUTOMATICALLY and KRAMER and the

others get out, patting each other on the back.

MISSION CONTROL
(OS)
We read you loud and clear, Mars
Endeavor, loud and clear.

COMMANDER KRAMER
We’re all fine. And ready to prepare for
landing on Mars, as scheduled. The view
is spectacular.

SHE MOVES TO THE WINDOW AND SEES HAROLD’ S CRAYON NOTE, which
read backwards, and she looks at it, PUZZLED.

CUT TO:

C
 1.LL1.

183 INT. SONIA’S HOSPITAL ROOM - MORNING 183

The fetal heart monitor beats loud and fast.

(Th
Hey, I’m contracting again.

DOCTOR
Fantastic. Everything’s turned around.

WARREN
Way to go, honey.

She smile tiredly.

CUT TO:

184 EXT. SPACE 184

HAROLD IS FLYING FAST THROUGH SPACE IN HIS BAT; he’s drawn

clear space helmet for the baby and the Matador.

CUT TO:

THE MONSTER SEEMS TO BE FALLING APART GRIMACING IN PAIN

-- --

AS HE FLIES BACK, BEHIND MARS PORCUPINES FALLING OFF HIM

--

AND FLOATING INTO SPACE, SMILING SERENELY.

CUT TO:

HAROLD PULLS HARD ON THE RUDDER TO MAKE A U-TURN 185

C 185

HAROLD
--

Let’s check out the spaceship!

He coasts toward it, and HOVERS NEARBY --

HAROLD
(continuing)
Hey, I think we mightta fixed the
antenna.

BABY
Wow! Wait’ll I tell Mom and Dad all
about this!

HAROLD
You can’t tell them everything --

MATADOR
This is our secret, nino.

(CONTINUED)

C,
 .LI.L.

185 CONTINUED: 185

BABY
Yes, I can, I’ll tell them all about how
you wished I was dead, and then the
monster ate me and --

SUDDENLY, A LOUD ANGELIC CHOIR SINGS FULL BLAST, AND HAROLD

DRAWS HASTILY ON THE FLOOR OF THE BOAT

A SLIGHTLY GOOFY-LOOKING ANGLE RISES UP ABOVE THE BOAT

THE ANGEL I?DIATELY SLAPS HER HAND OVER THE BABY’ S BLABBING
MOUTH, SHUTTING HIM UP.

MATADOR
I thought it was supposed to be a
delicate finger over the lips.

THE ANGEL RISES UP MORE GLOWINGLY AS THE OFF SCREEN CHOIR

SWELLS AND --

CHOMP - THE MONSTER DEVOURS THE ANGEL AND IS COMING BACK AT

THEM. THE AUDIENCE JUMPS.

THE MONSTER COMES TOWARD THEM, OPENS WIDE, WHEN SUDDENLY THE
BABY STARTS FLOATING UPWARDS, AND HAROLD GRABS HIS ANKLE --

HAROLD
What’s going on?

THE BABY FLINCHES SUDDENLY UPWARD, JUST AS THE MONSTER CHOMPS

THE BOAT IN HALF, NARROWLY MISSING HAROLD AS HE CLUTCHES THE
C MATADOR’ S HEAD AND IS JETTED TOWARD EARTH BY THE BABY.

CUT TO:

186 INT. SONIA’S HOSPITAL ROOM - EARLY MOFNING 186

SHE GRIMACES WITH A BIG CONTRACTION.

DOCTOR
Hold on, we’re not out of the woods yet,
folks --

CUT TO:

187 EXT. SPACE - NIGHT 187

THE BABY IS JETTING AWAY FROM MARS, TOWARDS EARTH, AS HAROLD

HANGS ONTO THE BABY’S ANKLE.

THE MONSTER CHASES THEM, SNAPPING HIS JAWS SWIPING HIS CLAWED
HANDS AFTER THEM --

(CONTINUED)

C
187 CONTINUED: 187

THEY RACE THROUGH SPACE LIKE THIS, PAST ASTEROIDS --

HAROLD LOOKS AHEAD AND SEES THE MOON AHEAD AND HEADS TOWARD
IT--

THE MONSTER CLOSES IN ON THEM OPENING WIDE

-- AS THEY ZIP
--

AROUND THE MOON HAROLD

-- LET’S OUT A SCREAM AS THE MONSTER’S
TEETH START TO CLOSE AROUND THEM WHEN --

THE MONSTER SUDDENLY JERKS TO A STOP AND HIS BITE MISSES --

HAROLD LOOKS BACK AND SEES THE MOON HOLDING THE MONSTER’S
TAIL IN HIS MOUTH. THE MOON SUCKS THE THRASHING MONSTER UP
IN ON GULP, SHUTS HIS MOUTH AND SMILES --

HAROLD SMILE BACK

CUT TO:

188 INT. SONIA’S HOSPITAL ROOM— EARLY MORNING 188

Several nurses are preparing Sofia for delivery. WARREN

STROKES HER HAIR AND KISSES HER FOREHEAD.

S ON IA
(WINCES WITH CONTRACTION)
Yowww.

DOCTOR
Ready for the delivery room?

C Almost --
NURSE

DOCTOR
Let’s hurry it up --

THE DOOR EXPLODES OPEN AND SWAT COPS BARGE IN --

SWAT COP
We haven’t found him yet?

SONIA
Found who yet?

WARREN
Get out of here --

DOCTOR
(PUSHING THE COPS OUT)
I want you off this obstetrics ward right
now --

(CONTINUED)

C
 iLi.

188 CONTINUED: 188

SONIA
(CONTRACTING)
AHHHHHHH

C DOCTOR
(PREPARING TO MOVE SONIA)
Let’s get ready to move her.

CUT TO:

189 EXT. SPACE - NIGHT 189

THE BABY IS RIPPED FROM HAROLD’S HAND --

HAROLD
Hey!

MATADOR
Grab him, Harold!

HAROLD
I can’t!

Harold falls after THE BABY at high velocity, they both look
terrified as they fly, separately, through clouds toward
Earth.

The Baby disappears into the clouds... Harold looks around.

He keeps falling, falling, falling...

C Harold falls into a dense white cloud and disappears.

FADE TO WHITE:

190 INTERIOR — WHITE AREA 190

LOW ANGLE, ON THE FLOOR: Harold is lying on the ground

surrounded by white. He looks up and around. Is it heaven?
Harold looks at his crayon. It is just a purple smudge in
the palm of his hand. The whiteness that surround him starts
to pull back away and reveal itself as the white sheets of
the hospital bed.

DOCTOR
(VO)
We are going to move you into the
delivery room and then...

CUT OUT TO WIDE OF:

C:
 114.

191 INT. SONIA’S HOSPITAL ROOM - MOENING 191

The Doctor, Nurse and Warren roll the bed towards the door

c revealing Harold lying on the floor, with his drawings.

WARREN
(interrupting the Doctor)
Harold! There you are.
(swooping him up off the
ground, kissing him and
hugging him and showing him to
Sonia)
He was underneath the bed the whole time.

SONIA LEANS OVER TO SEE HIM.

SONIA
(OUT OF BREATH FROM LABOR)
Oh, my God. Whats that green goop?

WARREN
Are you all right?

HAROLD
(DAZED, LOOKS UP AT THEN)
I had to go to Mars to get the baby back.

SONIA
(LAYING BACK IN THE BED)
Uh-huh.

HAROLD
It was inside the monster, but I wanted
to get it back.

SONIA
(EXHAUSTED)
Of course you did.

WARREN
And you did a great job.

He picks Harold up and Sofia is wheeled out by the doctor.

CUT TO:

192 INT. HOSPITAL CORRIDOR - DAY 192

As Sonia is wheeled away, Warren hold Har”ld as he walks down

the hail.

(CONTINUED)

C
192 CONTINUED: 192

WARREN
Man, I looked all over the hospital for
you.

HAROLD
Sorry, Daddy, but I had to --

WARREN
You had to get the baby from Mars, which
I understand, but please, just do me one
favor.

HAROLD
What?

WARREN
Don’t ever disappear like that again.
And, for God sake, don’t tell your mother
I didn’t know where you were all night,
OK?

HAROLD
OK.

He hugs his father.

CUT TO:

193 INT. WAITING ROOM - DAY 193

C ON TV: The MARS LANDER sets down on the surface of Mars.

Harold sits between Nuddleman and Jimmy, and watches.

JIMMY
Your father was pinching a brick over
you, kid.

NUDDLEMAN
Don’t talk to the kid like that.

JIMMY
Like you know how to talk to kids.

NUDDLEMAN
You’re interrupting my experience with
history here, Jimmy.

SWAT COP
I need you to sign this release saying
you called in our services.

(CONTINUED)

C
 193 CONTINUED: 193

WARREN WALKS IN, wearing a surgical gown and a mask, pulled

away from his face.

WARREN
C (BEAMING)
Come and see the baby.

Harold takes his father’s hand and follow him into Sofia’s
room.

CUT TO:

194 INT. SONIA’S HOSPITAL ROOM - MORNING 194

Many NURSES bustle about, taking care of postpartum

activities. Harold comes into the circle and sees the baby
for the first time, cradled in Sonia’s arms.

SONIA
Meet your sister.

WARREN
Sid down and you can hold her.

Harold sits in a chair next to the bed and hold the baby.

HAROLD
I though it was a boy.

WARREN

C’ You thought a lot of things.

The DOCTOR EXAMINES THE BABY’S LEFT HAND.

DOCTOR
Her left hand --

WARREN
What’s wrong?

DOCTOR
It won’t open.

While the doctor talks to the parents, they ignore Harold,

who is looking at the baby’s hand. PUSH IN ON HAROLD AND THE
BABY.

DOCTOR
(continuing)
We’ 11 give it a few days.

(CONTINUED)

C,
194 CONTINUED: 194

SONIA
(OS)
What do you think it means?

0 DOCTOR

Probably nothing. It’s too soon to talk

about surgery.

WARREN
(OS)
Surgery!

While the adults talk and ignore Harold and the baby, the
BABY OPEN HER EYES and looks at Harold, who is delighted and
fascinated.

DOCTOR
(O.S.)
It’s a very healthy baby, I wouldn’t
worry about this.

THE BABY’S HAND OPENS, as the adults don’t even pay

attention.

On the hand is a little purple smudge. The baby coos.

HAROLD
(WHISPERS)
Hello, baby.

DOCTOR
Well, look at that.

He examines the hand with the PURPLE SMUDGE.

DOCTOR
(continuing)
A little purple, that’s all, and I bet
that will face away.

Sonia strokes Harold’s hair.

WARREN
Don’t be on it.

Pan to the television set: “LIVE FROM MARS”

Commander Kramer takes her first strep onto Mars.

(CONTINUED)

C
 110.

194
194 CONTINUED: (2)

COMMANDER KRAIER
With step, we enter a new world

Kramer walks across

CREDITS ROLL OVER THIS SHOT as Commander
the Martian Landscape:

COMMANDER KRAMER
(continuing)
I
The surface of Mars is beautiful --

r my feet
feel the life of the planet unde
-- the soil is rich, as I take these
from the
first steps on the fourth planet
sun, I want to thank ever y perso n on
Earth who helped us get here , espe cially
naut who man aged to fix
the unnamed astro
our antenna, wher eeve r you are.

LD SMILING AS HE HOLD THE

PAN OFF THE TELEVISION SET TO HARO
BABY.
CUT TO:

195
195 TELEVISION
s to explore the new
Commander Kramer turns and continue
End.
terrain. Credits continue, fade out.