Cherry Hill 2-Finding Happiness Dixie

Lynn Dwyer
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Cherry Hill 2: Finding Happiness Autumn wants to put the past
behind her and finally focus on what she wants and needs in life.
There's a lot to unlearn, and to forget in order for her to be free and
find happiness once and for all. Coming to the town of Cherry Hill
wasn't what she expected. Not the support, the caring, empathetic
community, or the men who respect women, and protect them
twenty-four seven.
She witnesses firsthand their support and protection and soon
comes to realize that true love doesn't come with fists and pain, but
with desire, trust, and a love so deep there are no guidelines, just
letting go and giving in, making good things happen, and set her
free.

She has her reservations and deals with the flashbacks from her past
despite them coming back to haunt and destroy her new life. She
fights for her men, for the love she feels, because of them she is
stronger, and loving them has brought her a happiness that no evil
will ever take away.

Ge nre s: Contemporary, Ménage a Trois/Quatre, Romantic

Suspense Length: 39,759

CHERRY HILL 2:

FINDING HAPPINESS

Dixie Lynn Dwyer

Siren Publishing, Inc.

www.SirenPublishing.com

A SIREN PUBLISHING BOOK

Cherry Hill 2: Finding Happiness Copyright © 2018 by Dixie Lynn

Dwyer ISBN: 978-1-64243-568-9
First Publication: December 2018

Cover design by Les Byerley All art and logo copyright © 2018 by
Siren Publishing, Inc.

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED: This literary work may not be

reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, including
electronic or photographic reproduction, in whole or in part, without
express written permission.

All characters and events in this book are fictitious. Any resemblance
to actual persons living or dead is strictly coincidental.

W A RNING: The unauthorized reproduction or distribution of this

copyrighted work is illegal. Criminal copyright infringement, including
infringement without monetary gain, is investigated by the FBI and
is punishable by up to 5 years in federal prison and a fine of
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PUBLISHER

Siren Publishing, Inc.

www.SirenPublishing.com

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

For all titles by Dixie Lynn Dwyer, please visit

www.bookstrand.com/dixie-lynn-dwyer

TABLE OF CONTENTS

CHERRY HILL 2:
FINDING HAPPINESS

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Epilogue

CHERRY HILL 2:

FINDING HAPPINESS

DIXIE LYNN DWYER

Copyright © 2018

Chapter 1

“ Welcome to Cherry Hill,” Autumn McCainely said aloud as she read

the sign and drove the beat-up Toyota into town. Her heart was
racing and she wondered if this place would be a new start for her,
or just temporary as her fears eventually weighed havoc on her
brain and made her leave again. She wasn’t sure. Just as she wasn’t
too happy about her aunt calling her cousin, a woman Autumn had
never even met before, and telling her about what Autumn went
through. She gripped the steering wheel tighter, and hoped the
fearful sensation in her chest would dissipate before she found the
house and had to speak. Right now her voice sounded shaky. As she
pulled onto the main street she was trying to read the signs to see
what direction to go in when she had to hit the brakes. A cop was
walking across the way and he looked mean, and sounded mean,
too, as he pointed at her. “Pay attention, kid.”

Kid?

She was petite, like five feet three, and weighed a hundred pounds
soaking wet, but with her large breasts and big ass she sure didn’t
look like a kid. Well, maybe behind the wheel of the beat-up Toyota,
and wearing a baseball hat and sunglasses, possibly. He turned to
stare at her, and she worried her bottom lip and quickly kept going.
She could still see him in her rearview mirror, and he was looking at
her license plate. What the hell for? That panicked feeling began to
grow as she stepped on the gas and got through town and to the
developments of homes outside of it. The cop was good-looking, tall
with blond hair and those dark sunglasses. He had to be over six
feet. It intimidated her and she didn’t trust cops, not a one. Learned
her lesson big time, and she had the bruises and the scars to prove
it. She swallowed and looked for the right street. Tulip Lane. It was
kind of cute, as were the other houses on the street, and then
behind them there were farms and larger spreads of land. It was a
pretty nice setup. When she got to the end of the block she saw the
two large pillars and a private entrance to a very large farm. She
could see the barn in the distance, then a big white house to the
right and a detached garage with a building above it.

Must be the apartment her aunt’s cousin, Bridget had described to

Autumn’s Aunt May.

Before she even reached the driveway, three large men and a
woman with long blonde hair came out of the house. Her aunt was
in her fifties and said her cousin was in her forties, but this woman
looked young, and her men, seasoned and good-looking cowboys
who appeared real serious. She felt that bit of embarrassment
encroach along her skin and knew she was turning red and felt her
breathing change. She reminded herself she was far from
Connecticut, and Connor. She turned off the ignition and got out of
the car, glad to stretch her legs. She drove for hours, seven in total
today. She took a deep breath, eased her palm along her ribs, the
pain still there from being broken, and she smiled.

Reaching her hand out, the attractive older woman smiled wide and
drew her in for a hug.

“My God, you are gorgeous!” Autumn gasped, and Bridget pulled
back. “I’m so sorry. I plum forgot about your injuries.” She reached
out and caressed the long ponytail that hung over Autumn’s shoulder
and against her chest. “I can’t believe it. We have the same hair
color, and even the same eyes. Shay, Ken, Brady, come over here
and meet my cousin Autumn. Ain’t she something else?” Bridget said
and released her. The three men stepped forward, and Autumn
gulped. They were good-looking men, dark hair, dark eyes, big
muscular shoulders, and they looked like military.

“This is Shay, he’s a state trooper, and Ken and Brady run things on
the ranch and do some work for the government. They’re good men,
were Marines so don’t you worry about a thing.”

“Nice to meet you, Autumn. I hope the ride was okay,” Shay said to
her and eyed her over in a way police tended to do when sizing
people up. She kept her shoulders straight and reached out to shake
his hand. He was so big her small hand was lost in it. He stepped
back, and then she shook Ken’s and Brady’s hands next.

“Hmm, I think we’re going to have our hands full big time, don’t you
think, fellas?” Bridget said to them.

“We got it covered. So, Autumn, let’s show you around and then we
can drive over to the apartment you can stay in unless you’ll be
more comfortable in the house with us?” Shay asked.

“Oh, thank you, but I’ll be fine in the apartment. Aunt May said the
rent is four hundred a month with utilities?” she said as they started
walking toward the house.
“Not for family it isn’t,” Bridget said and then placed her hand on
Autumn’s shoulder and guided her toward the large front porch with
the big cushioned rocking chairs on it. She had planters in boxers
around the area and of course some flowers hanging, too.

“This is gorgeous.”

“You’re welcome to come sit out here any time you want. I don’t get
to enjoy it nearly as much as I should. Been real busy with my
baking business and catching up with orders and then delivering
them.

Takes a lot of time.”

“What kind of things do you bake?” Autumn asked as they entered

the house and the smell of something delicious filled the air.

“I do a lot of fruit pies, cookies, cupcakes, and special order

celebration cakes. Things like that,”

Bridget told her.

“It smells so good in here,” Autumn said, and then they entered the
extra-large industrial-style kitchen.

There were multiple ovens, a really big stove with eight burners and
two wall ovens, a huge island in the middle, and even a big table
that sat fifteen.

“My God, this is awesome in here. A cook’s dream kitchen.”

“And a baker’s. My husbands helped me to design it.”

“I love it. It’s very impressive.”

“Do you cook, Autumn?” Brady asked her.

“I love cooking. I actually worked as a short-order cook through
college. It was a lot of fun.”

“Your Aunt May said that you would probably want to find a job and
work,” Bridget said to her and then offered her a bottle of water.

“Yes, thank you. Uhm, actually I will be looking for work, but I need
something well…”

She looked at Shay, him being a state trooper, and wasn’t sure about
stating how she needed to be paid off the books because technically
that was kind of illegal with tax purposes and all.

“Off the books. We get it. May explained to Bridget that you’re
concerned about this ex of yours. We got it covered and have set
some potential opportunities up for you,” Shay said to her and eyed
her over, looking kind of angry or maybe that was just these men’s
demeanors. Bridget said they were retired military. That Shay was a
trooper and Ken and Brady worked for the government.

“Wait, I don’t know what you planned, but I don’t want you all more
involved than you already seem to be. I was fine traveling on my
own for the last four weeks.”

“Injured, no protection, scared I’m certain, too, and well, seeing you
now, I for one am glad you’re here and this is working out. A petite,
beautiful young woman like yourself traveling alone would be a
target.

It’s a blessing that nothing happened the last four weeks,” Ken
stated.

“I took precautions best I could. I drove a lot. Seven hours today to

get here.” Shay’s eyes widened.

“Well, no more traveling alone or running. You’ll be safe here in

Cherry Hill and under our protection,”
Brady told her.

“Yes, and with our connections between the police and the
government, we’ll know if this ex of yours decides to start looking
for you,” Ken said to her.

She felt the tears in her eyes and rubbed her hand along her ribs.
“You all know that Connor was in the army and that he’s a cop in a
local town there in Connecticut?” she asked them.

“We know honey,” Bridget said to her. She swallowed hard.

“He didn’t lose his job for what he did. They assigned him anger
management and counseling. He’s on probation for three months.
He’ll start looking as soon as he has access to the computers at
work.”

“You were smart though. You didn’t register the car in your name.
You haven’t used any credit cards.

You emptied your savings account and have been using cash,
correct?” Shay asked her.

“Yes, sir, but he was in the military. He thinks differently. I left before
I was even fully recovered, ya know.”

“We have a great doctor in town, a friend and one who can keep
things quiet, but Bridget will explain the rules around Cherry Hill,
and how things have to go,” Shay said to her.

“Rules? What do you mean?” Autumn asked and felt a bit nervous.

“This week, I’ll introduce you to Sheriff Kane McCabe. He runs the
show around here and is in charge of ensuring every member of
town’s safety,” Shay told her.
“I’m good. You just said you guys would protect me, and for obvious
reasons I don’t trust cops, so talking to this sheriff isn’t an option.”

“Oh, it will have to be because as soon as he finds out you’re living

in town, and then working in town, he’ll introduce himself and
welcome you. We’ll beat him to all the other stuff and just tell him
why you’re here and about the protection you need.”

She adjusted her bag on her shoulder and started to backstep.

“Well, I guess this isn’t going to work out after all,” she said. Shay
and his brothers squinted at her, and she started walking back
toward the door.

“Autumn,” she heard him say, but then Bridget told them to let her
talk to her. As she got outside and headed to the car, Bridget ran up
to her.

“Autumn, wait. Please, honey.” She stopped, exhaled, and turned

around to face her. Autumn’s heart was racing. “Look at me,” Bridget
said to her and Autumn tilted her head up to lock gazes with
Bridget.

She stared down at her, and into her eyes, and Autumn couldn’t help
but to feel defeated and like she was truly on her own no matter
what. She could never trust another man, another person fully, and
certainly not some sheriff or military men.

“I know you’re scared, and that you’re still in pain. You were in an
abusive relationship for over a year, and now that things have
changed and you finally got out from under Connor’s strong hold,
you’re on the defensive. The thing is, that’s okay, and it’s you that
needs to get through this and get over him and what he did. You
don’t need to do that alone. We aren’t the bad guys. Shay, my men,
the sheriff, are not bad men like Connor was. You’ll learn to see that
and know it’s the truth. You need a safe place to recover, to start a
new life and to feel safe, to maybe even be happy. Cherry Hill is that
place. With my men and I to help you means you aren’t alone in that
fight for a new life, a new start, and that happiness a young,
beautiful woman like you deserves to have. You can do this, and if
you aren’t ready to talk to the sheriff, then Shay can do it for you, or
I can, or we can just wait, but he runs a clean safe town and he will
question who you are and what your story is because everyone’s got
one. Me included, which I’ll share some day real soon with you.” She
stepped closer and pulled her into an embrace. “You don’t need to
run anymore, Autumn. Safety is here. A new start is here. Give it a
chance, and it will work out, I promise.”

Deputy Aldreck Forester was wrapping things up after a minor

fender bender on Main Street when he caught sight of that beat-up
Toyota with the out-of-state license plate. She had nearly run him
over last week coming through town. When he didn’t see the kid
again he figured she was just passing through on her way to Central
Valley.

He watched her turn the corner and then pull into the main parking
lot by the café. What he hadn’t expected was Bridget Hayes to get
out of the passenger seat, and then for the driver to get out. Aldreck
had great vision, and it served him well as a ranger in the military,
too. So when she got out, he gazed over her body. She was petite,
had thin legs, wore heeled boots that accentuated them in the knee-
length jean skirt she wore, and from here it appeared she wore a
pale pink tank top with a floral see-through blouse over it. She
pushed her long, platinum-blonde hair behind her ear, and before
she took two steps some men tipped their hats and nearly tripped
looking at her. She seemed oblivious to that, but not Bridget as she
took the woman’s arm and led her toward the café. The platinum
blonde looked around the place with sunglasses on.

They headed inside, and he wondered who in the world she was.
Only one way to find out and that was going into the café. The
sheriff was in there with his brothers and Athena. He could go say
hello, see how Athena was feeling, and find out who the platinum
blonde was.

“Meet Sheriff Kane McCabe.” Bridget introduced Autumn to the

sheriff, his girlfriend, and Culter, Chase, and Fox, his brothers. All
very large man. In fact, Autumn gulped because she was so much
shorter than them.

“Pleasure to meet you, Autumn. You here visiting or sticking around

a while?” the sheriff asked her, and he looked her over, squinted,
and then glanced at Bridget.

Bridget placed her hand on Autumn’s shoulder. “She’s considering

moving here. She’ll be staying in the apartment at our place.”

“I see. Well, welcome, and please, you need anything at all, you
come see me at the department, or have one of Bridget’s men get in
contact with me. I’m sure Bridget explained how things work around
here, so we’ll catch up sooner or later,” he told her.

“Understood, sir, so nice meeting you all,” she replied, but that
uneasy feeling filled her gut. This place wasn’t normal. At least not
anything like where she lived in Connecticut. They turned around
and headed to the counter, and an older woman greeted them.

“Bridget, this must be your cousin,” the woman said and came right
over, wiping her hands on her apron. She looked Autumn over.

“My oh my, aren’t you stunning, and a petite little thing, too. You
done this kind of work before?” the woman asked.

“Yes, ma’am, mostly short-order cook for a time, but I waitress just
fine,” Autumn told her and she smiled.

“Well, if you’ll learn anything real quick around here, it’s that Cherry
Hill is a family. We all pitch in when anyone is in need or looking for
a job, or whatever. You, my dear, will be drawing in a crowd. You
sure you want to be waitressing?”

“I’m sure, ma’am, and of course if you have the room for me. Don’t
want to step on anyone’s toes.”

“Not at all. I lost two waitresses recently. One too far along in her
pregnancy to continue, and one who came into town looking to pick
up men and have a good time. Knew she wouldn’t last. I can give
you some hours on Monday and Wednesday to start. See how you
do and see if you like it. The menu’s pretty simple, and most people
tend to stick to the same things and of course some of the specials.”

“Well, I appreciate the opportunity, Mrs. Forester.”

“Oh please, call me Molly.” She looked past Autumn with a big smile
on her face. “What are you doing here?” she asked, and Autumn
turned around and looked way up at the tall, blond deputy with
gorgeous blue eyes. He was built, and she actually took a step back.
She remembered him. She almost ran him over when she first got
into town. Oh God, he was good-looking.

She heard Bridget chuckle, and apparently as she stared at the

deputy he stared at her, looking her over, and boy did she feel it.
She was going to turn away, but then Molly began to speak.

“Autumn, meet one of my sons, Aldreck. As you can see he’s a

deputy in town,” Molly said, and he stepped closer, reached out his
hand.

“Autumn,” he said to her and she reached her hand out. His was so
big compared to hers that she gasped from the size difference and
pulled back. She lowered her eyes, pushed her hair behind her ear,
and then cleared her throat.

“New to town huh? Y’all planning on sticking around here?” he

asked, with one hand on the butt of his gun and the other on his
utility belt. She knew that look, that expression, and she wasn’t
going to fall for any man in uniform again.

“Maybe,” she replied.

“Well, if you do, remember to go a little slower, especially by the

crosswalks.”

“Sorry you didn’t see me coming and stepped out.”

“I was already walking across, and you need to slow down. Now let’s
leave it that,” he said in a snappy tone. She felt like flipping him the
bird, but instead she turned her back toward him.

“Well, it was nice meeting you, Molly. I’ll let you know about the job
offer.”

“What do you mean let her know?” Bridget asked. She gave a nod
toward the deputy, and Bridget chuckled.

Molly gave her son a look then looked back at Autumn. “Don’t you
mind my son. He can be a bit rough around the edges. I’m sure that
little situation was no big deal, and you’ll be more careful. Make sure
you get here to start by 5:00 a.m. We open up about 5:15 for
customers. I have a new apron in the back, so maybe wear black
pants or a black skirt, comfortable shoes because you’ll work 5:00-
4:00. Then the night crew comes in for early bird and dinner.”

Autumn wasn’t too sure, and she glanced back toward Aldreck who
was talking to the sheriff but kept looking at her.

“Go on. This will help you learn about Cherry Hill and help you make
a decision about staying here,”

Bridget said to her, and Molly smiled wide.

“Okay. I’ll be here on Monday morning.” She reached her hand out
to shake Molly’s, and then she and Bridget went to go sit at a table.
But then other locals were asking who she was, and more
introductions were made. She was shaking, and when she went to
go sit down she felt the ache to her ribs.

“Are you sure you’ll be okay to work the long hours right off the
bat?” Bridget asked her.

“I’ll be fine, plus I was working as soon as the visible bruises were
gone or what cover-up could cover,” she said to Bridget.

“Jesus,” Bridget said and shook her head. “I don’t know why my
cousin didn’t call me sooner. I mean seriously, the connections my
men have alone could have probably helped.”

“It was a bad situation. One I got myself involved in and it was
easier to just disappear than work things out from there.” She
swallowed hard as the waitress came over and introduced herself.

“I’m Leeann. Molly just said you’re going to start working on

Monday.”

“That’s the plan, Leeann,” Autumn said, and Leeann smiled wide.

“What can I get you to drink?” she asked.

“Sweet tea for me,” Bridget said.

“I’ll do the same.” When she walked away, Autumn looked at the
menu. It was easy enough to memorize, and Autumn was really
good at that. She was good at bartending too which was the last job
she had, but that brought even more attention to her and of course
creepy guys.

“So tell me about the sheriff and their woman. She looked a little
pale.”
“Oh, she’s still recovering from injuries she sustained when she was
abducted by these men, but her men saved her.”

“What?”

“It’s a long story, and I don’t have all the details, but she is lucky to
be alive. Athena came here on the run, and was in hiding from some
men the government were after, or something like that. Anyway, I’m
afraid her story is similar to a lot of us.”

“Of us? You mean you, too?” Autumn asked as Leanne brought over
the sweet teas and took their order.

“Mine was a bit complicated. I was working for my parents at our

bakery in South Carolina when I met Richie. He was good-looking,
older, a businessman, and well, I fell for his charms and
manipulations, and the next thing I know I’m in an abusive
relationship and he’s trying to force me to stop baking, stop pursuing
my dream of a pastry shop or something. It was a long vicious cycle,
and I didn’t get out of the relationship until I found out he was
cheating on me. I was devastated, and he blamed me. Broke my
arm in three places, beat me up so badly I wanted to die from the
pain in my body and my heart.”

Autumn wiped the tear from her eye before it fell. Bridget covered
her hand, squeezed it, and gave her a small smile. “My mom showed
up when I said I was sick and couldn’t come into work. She knew
the routine, that more than likely my boyfriend beat me up again. It
was embarrassing, but then she asked me if I wanted a better life. If
I didn’t want to feel pain again. Or if I was willing to let him continue
to take away my identity, my soul, and eventually kill me. I knew the
answer and I said no, but I was scared. Oh God, was I so scared
about what he would do when he found out I left. My mom told me
that this was the only option. That they had a friend and a town that
was more special than anything I could have imagined, and they
sent me here to Cherry Hill. I left everything behind me, every ounce
of clothing, of dreams for New York, and wound up here. It was a
bad few months. I didn’t trust anyone but Molly. Her mom knew my
mom, and Molly has a huge heart.”

“How did you deal with the fears? With knowing in the back of your
head that at any time he could find you, could drag you back or
even hurt you right where he found you?”

“I don’t think I really got rid of that feeling right away. It took time.
Even years later I could smell something, like a cologne or a cigar,
and I get a flashback, or a sensation like fear, but it’s so small now.

My men were amazing, and they saw me through it all.” Bridget

smiled and looked away a moment.

“Weren’t you scared to get involved with another man, never mind
three?”

“Scared is an understatement. I was a panic, but as they continued

to show me compassion, respect, and a gentleness from men I knew
nothing about, it just happened. I fell in love with them, and they
became my world.”

“They’re big men, very attractive, and seem capable. I know it’s only
been a week, but I catch Shay watching me closely, almost like he
doesn’t trust me.”

“No, that’s not it. He’s afraid you’re going to run off. Afraid you’ll let
that control Connor had over you send you back to the abuse and
the danger.”

She was quiet a moment. Then Leeann brought over their food.

She looked at the meal, and it was huge. Chicken salad on toasted
rye bread with fries, but the bread was huge.
“I thought about going back. When I was driving for the past six
weeks. When I was going into these towns and not knowing how to
not stand out, how to survive. Night time was, well, is the worst.”

“But you called your aunt, and that was the best thing you could
have done.”

“I knew I couldn’t go see her. Connor can find out about her, which
was why I worried about even contacting Aunt May.”

“She knows to take proper precautions, and her sons are nearby if
anything were to happen or Connor showed up there. Plus I
wouldn’t put it past my cousin to take out her shotgun and take
Connor out if he tried to break in or threaten her.”

Autumn shivered and then rubbed her hands on her jeans. Connor,
being a police officer and a soldier, used to threaten her with his
gun, and even the hunting knife he had. He thought it was funny
when she cried and begged for him to not come close to her with
them, and he would laugh.

“Hey, Autumn, it’s okay, just breathe. Relax your mind, focus on
something in the café, focus on me, and breathe,” Bridget
whispered, and Autumn felt the wetness against her cheeks, then
turned to the left where Molly was standing as if blocking the view
from the rest of the restaurant as she smiled.

“There ya go.” Autumn looked at Bridget. “No, no, no, don’t say a
word, don’t even think about it. We got you,” Bridget said.

“Yes we do,” Molly said and then turned around and headed back to
the counter. Autumn caught the sheriff’s gaze and Aldreck’s gaze,
and she quickly looked at Bridget.

“We should go.”

“No need to. You need to eat. You haven’t been eating three meals a
day, and working here waitressing is going to be hard if you aren’t
fueled properly. Have you thought about the classes at the dojo in
town?

The sheriff’s brother Culter owns it and runs things.”

“No, I don’t think it’s worth it.”

“Why not?”

“Because even if I could do some moves I wouldn’t stand a chance

against men like Connor, hell, like the men around this town.”

“That isn’t the point, and you would be surprised at what self-
defense can teach you. It also builds up your self-confidence.”

“I’ll see.”

She took a bite of the sandwich and felt her belly tighten and that
sensation of not wanting to eat, of feeling full, began and got worse
three more bites into it.

“You need to do better than that.”

“I’m full. It’s fine. I’ll bring the rest home for dinner.”

Autumn wasn’t sure how she felt about this town, although Molly’s
move to block anyone from seeing Autumn zone out a moment did
say a lot. She liked the woman, and she hoped this worked out well.

Chapter 2

Kane leaned back in his chair in the sheriff’s office while Shay Hayes
stood next to Manderine Forester and Deputy Aldreck Forester.

“Been two weeks, got men asking about Autumn left and right.
Myself and Aldreck have noticed her favoring her right side and
holding it as she walks to her car. I think I’ve given enough time for
you, for Autumn herself to come talk to me. Hell, more than enough
time,” Kane said to Shay.

Shay narrowed his eyes at Kane. “Who’s been asking about her?”
Shay asked.

“Who hasn’t is more like it. She’s a stunning young woman. You can
see her coming from a mile away with that platinum-blonde hair,”
Kane replied.

“I tried talking to her several times, and she gives me the cold
shoulder,” Aldreck stated.

“Well, things started off a little badly with you, Aldreck, and the
whole situation of her nearly running you over in town,” Shay said
and Kane chuckled.

“Maybe he was staring at that platinum-blonde hair of hers,” his

brother Manderine teased.

They all snickered, and Shay exhaled.

“I’ve known you men for years. Manderine, Aldreck. Your mom and
dads helped Bridget when she first got to Cherry Hill, so I know
what this town stands for and what you’ll all do to help protect
Autumn.”

“She’s in danger then?” Kane asked.

“Well, my brothers are doing their part to hopefully get the heads-up
if the man who caused her injuries and pain, the man she’s hiding
from, was to head this way looking.”

“Shit,” Aldreck said and then looked at his brother Manderine. Kane
had a feeling the Forester men were taking an interest in Autumn,
but it was really too early to tell and as he knew personally if
Autumn was hiding and fearful, she wouldn’t let that guard down
any time quickly.

“What can you tell us, Shay?” Kane asked.

“Autumn isn’t too happy about having to come see you, Kane. She’s
intimidated by several things, and it isn’t just because she’s a petite
woman,” Shay said to them.

“Go on.” Kane nodded.

“She sustained a lot of bruising, which has healed in the last six
weeks, but the broken ribs are taking longer to heal.”

“Broken ribs? As in more than one?” Manderine asked with his

nostrils flared.

“Afraid so. She has them wrapped up still, then after work she soaks
in the tub from what Bridget found out yesterday.”

“Maybe she needs to see Doc Shelton?” Kane suggested. Shay shook
his head.

“Ain’t gonna happen. It’s going to be hard for her to accept help
from any cop or soldier around here.

We’re lucky she has allowed us to do a little, not much, but a little,”
Shay told them.

“Why is that?” Kane asked.

Shay took a deep breath and exhaled.

“Shay, you can trust us. We won’t say a word, and it will help us
understand her state of mind,”

Aldreck said to him.

“Her ex, the guy that beat her up, was abusive for over a year and a
half, was a soldier and a cop.”

“Fuck,” Manderine said.

“Jesus, no wonder she’s always looking at men around here like they
could hurt her or worse. What do you know about the guy and
where he’s at?” Kane asked.

“Ken and Brady used their resources, being careful not to divulge
information of course, and he’s on probation from the police
department in this small town in Connecticut. He has to go through
anger management counseling and some other bullshit. He doesn’t
lose his job, and since Autumn’s aunt contacted Bridget—they’re
cousins—and sent her here, there were no charges filed and pushed
through.

She would have had to go to court, and meanwhile he would be

roaming free. They had an apartment together and all her things
were there, and she left it all,” Shay explained.

“The poor thing must have been so scared. Where the hell did she
go for over a month before getting here?” Manderine asked.

“She traveled across the state, laid low, and then headed here. Day
she arrived she was driving seven hours,” Shay told them.

“Anything could have happened with her on her own like that,”
Aldreck said to him.

“Don’t I know it. We were all concerned, but she wouldn’t say where
she was, and her concern was for her aunt. The ex can easily find
out about her, and could use his police contacts to get an address. I
spoke to her aunt’s sons, and they’re on board. Her aunt owns guns
and knows how to use them, so hopefully that will be fine.”
“Holy crap. This is crazy. She should not be coming and going to
work alone,” Aldreck said to Shay.

“She’s safe around town, and like I said, the guy knows nothing
about Bridget. Even Autumn didn’t know about her because she was
whisked off from a bad relationship at a young age, too. I think if we
push too much, Autumn will close up and maybe even take off.
Although she is getting along well with Leeann at the café, and Molly
loves her to death already.”

“A lot of people do and think she’s so sweet and beautiful and

strong, too. Which led me to the whole idea of guardianship. Now
you know I don’t really push for this, but all things considered and
after what myself and my brothers went through with Athena, I’m
leaning this same way for Autumn.”

“Who would you appoint to her? I mean, can’t we remain her

guardians for now?” Shay asked.

“For now you can, but as more and more men come forward and try
to get to know her, we’ll have to pick the right men,” Kane said and
glanced at Manderine and Aldreck. They were hardcore, very serious
men in their positions as law enforcement officers and retired
soldiers. When they weren’t working they were training and helping
out their brothers Flex and Hill with security details and other things.

“I say let’s see what happens, and maybe she’ll get more
comfortable around certain men and then we won’t really have to
worry about making the wrong choice. In the interim, now you guys
know a bit about her story and what brings her here. She’s strong
and determined. Don’t look at her size and think she isn’t.

Although Ken and Brady are trying to talk her into taking on some
self-defense training. She has nothing.

That dick really beat her down mentally, as well.”

“Well, now that we know what she went through, we’ll keep extra
watch over her, as well,” Aldreck said, and Shay gave a nod. They all
shook hands, and then Manderine and Aldreck walked out of the
room.

Shay looked at Kane. “Autumn is so scared of those two she makes

Leeann take their orders. Bridget told me,” Shay said to him.

“Well, that’s understandable from what you told us about her ex,
plus Aldreck and Manderine are six foot three, and she’s like, what,
five foot two?”

“Yeah, and a hundred pounds soaking wet. I think she looks at every
man as if he might hurt her and how badly. I suppose it’s an instinct
that grows from being in an abusive relationship. It took Bridget a
long time to let my brothers and I in and to get close to her.”

“It takes time after something so traumatic. She’s young, too, and it
was probably a first real boyfriend, right?” Kane asked, thinking
about his own sister Charlotte, called Charlie for short.

“Yes, it was, and he was a bit older, too, but a total dick who knew
what he was doing. The whole head games thing. I don’t get it, but
I do get her fears of letting anyone close. It will take time.”

“Don’t I know it. Look at Charlie.”

“Her boyfriend was a soldier who had PTSD. He struck her one
night, and she hadn’t been the same.

When he left for another tour he didn’t make it back. Later on they
discovered he died from a self-inflicted wound. She felt like she
failed him despite forgiving him for hitting her. Then she turned that
anger into something good and finished her education, got her
doctorate, and started counseling soldiers. Yet, she has feelings for
some other men, and she denies those feelings out of the fear of
getting hurt, or losing them.”
“Is that why she keeps taking on these therapy assignments
overseas?” Shay asked.

Kane nodded.

“I don’t know how Titus Mullen and his brothers handle it. They’re
so damn tough I could see any of them throwing her over their
shoulder and demanding she admit to her feelings.”

Kane laughed. “As the sheriff of Central Valley, he can’t quite do

that. Plus there’s a bit of an age gap.”

“That bothers you because she’s your sister?”

“Yeah, and Titus and his brothers are hard asses.” Shay chuckled.

“I guess we just wait and hope fate steps in and they take a
chance.”

“I guess so. Well, I appreciate the information, and if and when

Autumn and I talk, I’ll keep it on the down low with any questions.”

“She’ll know I spoke with you. I wouldn’t not tell her about today
because I want her to trust me, to trust all of us.”

“Sounds good to me.” They shook hands, and Shay exited the office.

Kane rubbed his jaw and thought about his sister Charlie. When was
she going to get back? He hadn’t heard a word from her in two
weeks. He got a call from Titus, and he was asking, as well. He
couldn’t push. She had her own ways of working things out. He then
went back to thinking about Autumn. She was attractive, feminine,
and came off sweet as could be, but he could see the instant
interest in Aldreck’s eyes that first day in the café. Would the
Forester brothers pull their shit together, temper down those
hardcore ways, and gain Autumn’s interest and trust? He didn’t
know, but it was more than likely going to be one hell of a scene to
watch. He shook his head and texted Athena. He missed her, and he
worried despite knowing his brothers were with her. Who would
have ever thought him and his brothers would settle down? He
chuckled and then went back to doing paperwork. It was after four
o’clock. He would head home soon enough.

Connor Row sat there in the counseling session, trying to pretend

that he was listening and learning the calming techniques. They
were all bullshit. All made for a bunch of fucking pussies. His
buddies on the force and at the boxing club teased him about having
to come here. That one dick, Burger, thought he was so fucking
funny when he said Connor wasn’t man enough to keep his woman
in line and in bed. The worse was how other men told him he fucked
up big time by cheating on a fine piece of ass like Autumn.

He did fuck that up. He was drunk, wound up in bed with the two
women, and then it became a habit.

Autumn was so damn sweet and scared of him. Those two women
he cheated on her with were tough.

They boxed and did martial arts, and when he started smacking
them around they hit back, and then it was all about the sex and
taking them one after the next.

That fucking aunt of hers must have been the one to help her
escape, but where the hell did that bitch live? He couldn’t use his
resources to get the information from the computer, and he sure as
shit didn’t want to ask his cop buddies who were already telling him
he fucked up and he was lucky he didn’t get fired. There was no way
his ass would get fired because he had dirt on all the higher-ups. On
the lieutenant, the chief, his sergeant, everyone. He knew who they
were screwing and cheating with behind their wives’ backs, and he
knew who liked to join in a little orgy type action being open to
everything no matter what sex the person was. That was heavy shit.
Then of course he knew about who had the cocaine habit, and who
smoked weed on their break that worked in human resources and in
town hall. This small fucking town was filled with little shits who
thought they ruled a kingdom. There he was with the information
and evidence to take them all under, and they knew it.

As he pretended to exhale and then calm his mind, he thought about

that bitch Lucy who worked in the PD and had a sister who worked
in town hall. Maybe that was a way to get the information on
Autumn’s aunt? He smiled to himself and then told the therapist he
felt like that method really worked well for him.

Then he asked some bullshit question which the guy thought was so
wonderful. Finally he was out of there, and he hurried to his truck
and went right to town hall as he called Lucy.

“I don’t think I can assist you with that,” she said to him, and he
figured someone was around.

“I think you can. Just text her my number and tell her to help me
out with whatever I need. I’ll make it up to you. Get you some good
shit you like to smoke on the weekends. In fact, I can swing by after
work.

We could spend some time together. I sure could use a friend, Lucy.”

“I don’t know. You never asked me out before.”

“I’m not asking you out when we both know we can’t be more than
a good time on a lonely rainy night.

You know I have my eyes on you, and love the way your ass fills
those sexy dress pants. Invite me over.

We’ll celebrate your cousin helping me out with what I need, and
you won’t be lonely and instead will be satisfied. I’m that fucking
good.”
“You better not be messing with me. I’ve had a crush on you for a
while. I can show you how a real woman handles her man.”

“I’m sure you could. Text her, and then I’ll meet you at your place by
six.”

“Okay.”

He ended the call and licked his lips. She would have to do for now.
Wasn’t anything like Autumn. In fact she was a tall, thin, and had
medium-size boobs, but it had been a few weeks since he had sex.
It could take the edge off. He waited for the phone to ring.

“Come on, bitch, come through for me.”

As he waited he thought about Autumn. About her long platinum-

blonde hair that caught his eyes immediately. Then it was her round,
firm ass in a short skirt she had on, and of course when he got to
see her face, those big blue eyes, his cock got so fucking hard he
nearly came. She was a fucking virgin to boot. A gift from heaven
and controllable. Holy shit, she would shake when he spoke firmly,
and clench her eyes when he yelled. She was obedient, trusting, all
his in every way. He fucking went too far when she caught him
cheating. He fucked up big time. He wouldn’t fuck up again. In fact
wherever she was, he would find her, take her away to some special
romantic place, and keep her there until she forgave him and
complied with his orders and authority. He clenched his fist, opened
and closed it, remembering striking her so hard and leaving bruises
on her ribs, her face, too. He had lost his shit as he struck her and
thought about her leaving him. He knew he sort of went out of his
mind, lost focus of the present, and it had been years since he had
an episode like that. He ran his fingers through his hair and then
looked at his hands.

He spread them wide and saw that he was shaking. “I need you,
Autumn. I fucking need you,” he said, and then his cell phone rang.
He smiled and said hello.
“Hello, Lucy’s cousin. Tell me you’re even more attractive than your
cousin Lucy,” he said and heard the giggle. This was going to be a
piece of cake.

Chapter 3

“Long day?” Aldreck asked Hill and Flex as they walked into the
house around nine in the evening.

“I’m so damn tired, but by tomorrow afternoon this job should be

done. We’re just finishing off a few details,” Hill told him. Hill was tall
and stocky. Six feet three, wide shoulders like a linebacker, the man
looked beyond intimidating. Anyone would think twice before
challenging him. He looked like some crazy Russian boxer. His blond
hair was more dirty blond, crew cut, and his other brother Flex
looked almost identical except Flex’s hair was closer to a light brown
color with blond highlights. Both men had exactly the same build.
Which made for great security jobs where presence alone was a
deterrent.

“So by tomorrow you’ll both be finished with this job?” Manderine

asked, pulling some beers out of the refrigerator and passing them
to his brothers.

“Thank God yes, and I’ll tell ya, we’re taking a break for a little bit. I
haven’t been able to go work out at the gym, and Kenderick is
busting my balls telling me he’s going to take me in a match.” Hill
shook his head before he took a slug from the bottle of beer. They
chuckled.

“Kendrick is a wise ass, and he wants to get under your skin so he

can beat you. You got him good the last few times,” Flex told him.

“Sure as shit did. He was sporting that nice black eye, too,” Aldreck
added and chuckled.
“Hey, I didn’t mean to do that. He shot his head up as I rolled
toward him, putting him in that hold.”

They laughed. “He sure as shit deserved it. He was talking smack for
days and then added that you gave him a cheap shot,” Aldreck said,
and Hill shook his head. Manderine was by the counter, and Aldreck
knew he was still upset about the conversation and information they
learned about Autumn in the sheriff’s office.

“What’s going on around here? What did we miss the last week?”
Flex asked, taking a seat by the kitchen table.

“Same shit really. Caught those kids who were vandalizing the fence
by the old Westin house. Turns out that Mr. Westin got pissed at
them for setting a little campfire on his property one night, and it
nearly caused an out of control fire. He didn’t call the police but
instead handled it himself, and the kids got pissed and sought a little
revenge. They’ll be spending a bit of time doing community service,”
Aldreck told Hill.

Flex shook his head. “Fucking kids these days, they got no respect
for anything.”

Hill and Flex looked at Manderine.

“What’s up with you, Manderine? You’re real talkative?” Hill asked.

He made a funny face and then took a sip from his bottle of beer.

Flex leaned back. “Okay, what’s the deal? You got a bigger bug up
your ass than usual. I mean we’ve been passing through the last
week hardly getting a few words in, so what’s up? Something has to
be brewing.”

“It’s Autumn,” Aldreck said to Hill and Flex. Flex and Hill exhaled.
“What did you find out about her?” Hill asked, straight-faced. When
Autumn first came to town a few weeks back, Aldreck had talked to
them about how scared she seemed, and wouldn’t engage in further
conversation giving any information about herself. Then Hill and Flex
had caught sight of her walking from the café to her car and
immediately she stood out to them, but they didn’t date either. Had
been a while for all of them, and considering the types of women
that frequented Harper’s, Finnian’s bar, and McCormick’s pub, they
just hadn’t been interested.

“So what did you find out?” Flex asked in a hard tone, eyes
narrowed.

As Aldreck explained in detail what they learned in Sheriff Kane’s

office from Shay, his brothers looked more concerned.

“Why doesn’t Shay just call his contacts and take the dick out?” Flex
asked.

“It’s complicated, I guess, and seriously, he isn’t going to ask that

kind of favor. This isn’t a military operation.”

“Could be, and should be. From what we saw of her she’s petite, and
couldn’t defend herself against anyone,” Hill added.

“Well, the plan is to be diligent about her safety, keeping aware of

the guy looking for her and making sure she’s safe,” Aldreck said and
Manderine snorted.

“What is it, Manderine? She isn’t accepting the protection?” Hill

asked.

“She won’t talk to many people. Puts on a smile while she’s working,
but because of the broken ribs, she’s still in pain.”

“Broken ribs and she’s working at the café?” Flex asked and stood
up.
“Are Shay and his brothers out of their minds letting her do that?
What is wrong with them?” Hill asked.

“She’s determined to handle things on her own like she’s been doing
since getting away from that dick ex-boyfriend of hers,” Aldreck said.

“Well, that isn’t a bad thing, her showing independence and

determination to start a new life here in Cherry Hill,” Flex said.

“It can be if she unknowingly places herself in danger. There are a

lot of guys talking about her, checking her out, looking to get dates,”
Manderine said in a snappy tone and then tossed the beer bottle into
the garbage.

“Kind of how things work around here,” Flex replied and stared at
Manderine.

“She’s sweet and needs protection, not to be some new piece of

ass,” Manderine said to them.

Aldreck stood up. “We’ve been keeping extra eyes on her, you know,
trying to provide a bit more support despite her not really engaging.”

“Holy shit, you two want her? Fuck, I knew this was where you were
headed since that day she first came into town and nearly ran you
over,” Hill said.

“I thought she was a kid. Damn was I fucking shocked when she got
out of her beat-up car a week later with Bridget,” Aldreck said and
ran his fingers through his hair.

“You two are fucking six feet three, and she’s a damn peanut. No
wonder she’s not biting on the line you’re putting out there,” Flex
said.

“She isn’t biting on any lines. The only people she speaks to in town
are the sheriff, Leeann at the café, Molly and her husbands, and
more recently, Harper,” Manderine said to them.

“Well, you two better be sure about this if you want to pursue her.
You know what it could lead to. A fucking commitment,” Flex said to
them and stood up, tossed out his empty beer bottle, then went to
the refrigerator for another. He passed some more around and took
the empties and tossed them into the garbage.

“We don’t even really know her, but I feel like she needs protecting
and like I want to get to know her.

That’s a first for me. Hell, for us.”

“Hey, don’t start throwing us into this ménage commitment shit. We

don’t trust easily,” Flex said.

“Like we do?” Manderine added.

“We knew coming here, living in this town after serving our country,
that this was a possibility one day,” Aldreck stated.

“One we could avoid if we wanted to,” Flex said.

“One we don’t need to engage in and may not have the capabilities
either. How quickly you forget how intense we are. What we require
on a regular basis with one another, with the way this house is run
and the way we live our lives. We have schedules, we do what we
want when we want to, and a woman would change all that. A
woman would be an interruption, a distraction to our way of life. End
of story,”

Hill stated.

“Or, she could be so damn special she would be worth all those
changes just to have her close. To share her together, and bring us
all closer,” Aldreck said calmly.
“We are fucking close,” Flex said and stood up.

“Why the fuck are we talking about this? Hill and I don’t know her,
and it sounds like in the past few weeks you two haven’t made any
progress in getting to know her either. She isn’t something to pick
off a menu,” Flex said to them.

“No shit she isn’t. We’re bringing this up for a reason. Manderine
and I were affected by that conversation in Kane’s office. We
immediately felt the need to step in and to ensure her safety,”
Aldreck said to them.

“Well, you can do that as a deputy and a trooper. Just be sure this is
what you want,” Hill said to them.

“So you’re saying knowing what she went through, that the two of
you wouldn’t even give this a chance, or would get to know her?”
Aldreck asked them.

Flex looked mad serious as he glanced at Hill, then Manderine and

then to Aldreck. “I’m not a patient man. I don’t do gentle, and I
certainly don’t date, hold fucking hands, and pretend to be someone
I’m not.

That being said, it would take some serious sparks to fly for me to
even consider dating a woman, never mind committing to one. End
of story.”

Autumn had the radio on as she made her way into town. Glancing
at the dashboard she saw that the tire light came on just as she
entered the parking lot in town. Her heart began to race a little. She
glanced down, knowing that she should call Shay or one of them,
and then thought better of it. This whole idea of having to count on
men in this town, and letting them act like they can protect her,
watch over her, made her feel uneasy. She knew a little bit about
cars and had a flat tire while she drove to get to Texas. She took
care of it at a tire place in town. The sign came on, and it was
another two days before she started losing air and had to get to a
shop before her tire went flat. She had time. Plus, she forgot the cell
phone Shay got her.

She got out of the car, grabbed her purse, and locked it up just as
she spotted the patrol car cruising by.

It stopped of course, and good-looking, intimidating Aldreck Forester

stopped. “Good morning, Autumn,”

he said to her. It was still a little dark out at 5:00 a.m.

“Morning, Deputy Forester.’

“Sweetie, it’s Aldreck, remember?” he asked and looked her over.

“Of course.” She glanced toward the café and could see the lights on
and people waiting outside.

“I need to get to work.”

“I’ll be coming in for breakfast today. I get off by seven. Worked the
night shift.”

“Hmm, okay, well, enjoy.” She went around the front of the car, and
although she didn’t want to turn back and look, she did anyway.
Sure enough he was watching her.

As she said good morning to the patrons outside, Molly was there
telling them to come on inside as they got things started. Autumn
held the door open as a few old-timers came in. “You look wide
awake and beautiful as always, Autumn. God, to be young again,”
one of them said to her.

“Thank you, Mr. Parker,” she said and he gave her a smile. She
hurried to the back and said good morning to Molly, and her
husbands Dan, Bret, and Lucas just as Leeann came in.
“Morning, all,” Leeann said, and then Candice came in next. She was
wearing sunglasses.

“What’s with the shades, girl? Hungover?” Leeann teased, but

Autumn could tell that something was up because Candice didn’t
smile.

“Hold up one second,” Molly said and then covered her arm with her
hand. “Candice?” Molly asked her.

“I’ll be okay. I just need to wear the sunglasses.”

Molly shook her head, and Leeann looked upset as she squeezed
Autumn’s hand. Autumn gulped.

“Your brother come by for money again?” Molly asked her.

“It’s okay, Molly. I’ll be okay,” she said and then started crying.

“What’s going on?” Dan asked, coming from the back.

“Dell again.”

“Damn it. I’d better call the sheriff.” Dan pulled out his cell phone.
Autumn watched as even the old-timers came over and comforted
Candice.

When the door chimed and Aldreck came in, he looked downright
angry, but then as he approached he bent down to talk to Candice.
“Candice, come on and tell me what happened,” he said to her, and
she took the tissue from Leeann and wiped her nose. “Let me see
the damage.” He started to gently pull off her sunglasses. Leeann
mumbled a curse as they all saw the black and blue on her eye and
upper cheekbone.

“Dad, some ice please,” he said to Dan, and Dan turned toward the
kitchen and Lucas was there with ice.
Autumn watched how gentle Aldreck was despite his size and
demeanor as he stroked her jaw and then patted her knee. “I need
to know what happened this time, and maybe where I can find him.
He can’t keep assaulting you like this, and taking money from you to
support his bad habits. You know he’s wanted by the state police for
armed robbery.”

Autumn was shocked.

“I know. I was sleeping when he broke into the apartment. I got up,
had my baseball bat, and he raged.

He got that bat away from me in no time and then started yelling at
me, demanding money. I screamed at him that he can’t keep doing
this and that the police are after him, and he struck me and told me
if I told the police then he would come back…come back and kill
me.” She started sobbing.

“Jesus, this poor girl. Aldreck, we need to do something more,” Molly

said.

“Mom, we’re trying. The sheriff and Manderine will get more people
on this. What we’ll need to do is find a safe place for her to stay.
Maybe the women’s shelter in Central Valley for the time being,” he
suggested.

“You think he’ll come back and kill me?” Candice asked.

“I wouldn’t put it past him to hurt you or do worse. He isn’t in the

right frame of mind, and he’s been on the run for months now. We
need to take the proper precautions. There was a breakin at one of
the houses in Central Valley two days ago. Money and jewelry were
taken, and I know there were surveillance cameras set up and they
caught a decent description of the robber.”

“It was him?” Autumn asked. Aldreck looked at her and nodded, but
then he went back to consoling Candice who now applied the ice to
her eye.

“I think you should come to the station so we can do this all official.
Sheriff McCabe should be in shortly, and my brother is starting his
shift with the state police within the hour. He’ll get on top of things,”

he told her, and she shook her head.

“I need to work. I can’t leave them alone to handle the crowd on a

Monday. Plus, he took all my money.

I won’t be able to pay the rent or buy food.”

“No need to fret over that. We got you covered, honey,” Molly said to
her.

“But you helped me the last time,” Candice said.

“We’ll help, too,” Autumn and Leeann said at the same time and
then smiled at Candice who smiled back, reached out, and squeezed
Autumn’s hand and then Leeann’s.

“How about we see how that eye feels and looks after you ice it a bit
and we do the paperwork? If it’s okay and you’re up to it, you can
come back to work?” Aldreck suggested.

“Okay, Aldreck.”

Autumn locked gazes with Aldreck as he helped Candice up and out

of the café. From there on out everyone who came in asked about
Candice, talked about how much they would help her, and Autumn
started to really understand how the town worked.

Closer to ten was when Aldreck came back with Candice who got
hugs and kisses and offers of help from everyone. Aldreck took a
seat by the counter where Molly and Autumn were standing after
hugging Candice hello.
“She okay?” Molly asked him.

“As okay as she can be. She’s strong though, and determined to
come back to work. Manderine and Shay are involved now. I think
we should spread word for everyone around town to be more
diligent on their own coming and going, especially in and out of their
homes. Dell is out of control and reckless. The state police are
connecting him to two armed robberies.”

“Armed robberies. He didn’t pull out a gun or knife on Candice. She

didn’t mention that?” Autumn asked. He looked at her, and licked his
lower lip.

“Doesn’t mean he didn’t have it on him. Those robberies were within

the last week,” he told her and she nodded.

Molly poured him a cup of coffee and placed it down. “Want

something to eat, son?” she asked.

“Molly, can you help me with this?” her husband Lucas asked and
she nodded. “Autumn, can you take care of Aldreck please?”

“Of course, ma’am.” Molly widened her eyes and shook her head.
Autumn chuckled. “Yes, Molly,” She said and they laughed. She
glanced back up at Aldreck. Even sitting at the counter she needed
to tilt her head up a little. She locked gazes with his blue eyes.
“What can I get you?” she asked him. He rambled off the kind of
omelet he wanted, but with six eggs, a side of toast, hash browns,
and bacon, plus a muffin, as well. He was a big man and obviously
had a large appetite. He did have all those muscles. She felt a
tingling sensation in her core, and it shocked her. She quickly turned
around and got one of the warm muffins for him as she gave the
order to Dan.

She then took another order that came up and headed past him to
deliver it. She could feel his eyes on her as she spoke to a few guys
at a table who were flirting and asking her if she was going to the
fundraising event at Harper’s Saturday night.

“Molly and her husbands actually set up a tent out in the parking lot
along with other local vendors on Saturday. It may be a long day, so
I don’t think I’ll be going.”

“Oh, darling, you have got to go to Harper’s. You haven’t been there
yet?” one of the guys asked her.

He was young, closer to her age, and the way he looked at her was
the way a man looked at a woman to decide which part of her he
wanted to taste first, not in a sexy way, but like a man on the prowl.

“I’m sure I’ll make it there eventually. Can I get you anything else to
go with your breakfast?”

“A side of you?” he asked and winked.

“Paul!” The cowboy looked toward Aldreck who called his name, and
when she turned to look Aldreck had a mean look on his face in
warning.

Paul raised his hands up. “Sorry, Autumn.” She gave a nod. “Enjoy
your breakfast.

When she came back around the counter she noticed that a few of
the older couples were smiling and then whispering, looking at her
and Aldreck as she approached.

“How’s the muffin?” she asked him.

“You need to be more assertive when guys come onto you like that.
You can’t be so damn nice, or they’ll take it as an invite to do more.
He was about to touch you, Autumn,” he whispered harshly at her as
he leaned closer. She gulped and felt emotional. She didn’t like being
spoken to like this, and as far as those cowboys were concerned,
she got hit on a lot over the years and blew it off like she was doing
to them.

“What if I wasn’t here?” he asked her. She ignored him and got the
coffee pot then added more to the three men and woman by the
counter nearby and then to his cup. He covered her hand with his,
and she gasped, widened her eyes as she felt the instant physical
attraction to Aldreck. He inhaled and then exhaled. “You need
looking after,” he said firmly.

“No, I don’t.”

He released her hand, and then Molly came out with his order and
set it down. Aldreck’s eyes were glued to Autumn’s, and she didn’t
move either. Something transpired between them. A knowledge that
there was an attraction but she would fight it.

“Everything okay over here?” Molly asked. Just then the bell above
the door rang and Autumn felt her jaw drop, and she slowly stepped
back as two very large, big men entered the café. Immediately
people were greeting them hello, and then Molly smiled wide. “Flex,
Hill, what are you doing here? This is such a nice surprise. Three of
my four sons in one place at the same time. Now if only Manderine
walked through the door.” She hugged them hello. They had to bend
down to hug their mom, and the scene struck Autumn in such an
odd way. When the two extra large men looked right at her, she felt
her heart begin to pound, and she quickly turned away from them.

“Have a seat up here next to Aldreck. What can I get you to eat?”
Molly asked, and Autumn hurried to the counter by the pick-up
station to grab more dishes of food needing to go out. As she
walked by with an armful, Molly introduced her.

“Hill, Flex, this is Autumn. She’s new to town,” Molly said.

“Hi,” she said but kept walking. She quickly delivered the food to the
table and came back. Both men were looking her over before they
took a seat by the counter. Autumn came back around as the bell
rang.

“I’ll grab that. You get my sons some coffee please,” Molly said and
Autumn walked over to the coffee pot. She could feel their eyes on
her, and a glance at Leeann who raised her eyebrows up and down
and waved her hand, indicating the brothers were hot, helped her to
chuckle. So they were big, good-looking men who probably had
women drooling over them all the time. She could handle this. She
turned around with the fresh pot of coffee as she started another
new pot. She walked over and placed down the mugs.

“So how do you like working at the café?” the one brother, Hill,
asked her. She stared up at him, noticing he shared the same eye
color as his brother Aldreck but not quite the same as Flex whose
eyes were a much darker blue. These men made her heart race very
fast, and as she started pouring the coffee, the sight of Hill and
Flex’s large hands affected her. She nearly spilled the coffee and
tried to remember the question he asked.

“I like it a lot. Everyone is friendly,” she said and then walked away
with the coffee pot.

Flex couldn’t help but to watch Autumn as she worked, and also how
Aldreck kept talking to her when she came back behind the counter
in order to engage her in conversation. She was absolutely stunning,
and those darn baby-blue eyes drew him in every time she spoke.
She smelled good, too, and wore a light, enticing perfume, or maybe
body wash. He wasn’t sure, but the thought of body wash had him
really trying to look at her body. Unlike Leann who kept a top button
undone and showed a bit of cleavage, Autumn did not. She was
definitely well endowed, and it was easy to tell. Her waist was
narrow, and she had a nice ass. He could tell by the skirt she wore.
As she delivered more food, spoke with the patrons while their mom
and then their dads one by one came out to say hello, he still kept
watching Autumn and was surprised that Hill did, too. In fact as a
Another random document with
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henkilö, jonka mielipiteitä vastaan olen esittänyt vastaväitteitä, on
sitä mieltä, että kirkolla on täsmälleen määrätty paikkansa valtiossa.
Minä taasen olen lausunut häntä vastaan sen väitteen, että
päinvastoin kirkon tulee sulkea itseensä koko valtio eikä vain saada
siitä jokin nurkka ja että jos tämä jostakin syystä nyt on mahdotonta,
niin, asiain todellisen laadun mukaan arvostellen, se on ehdottomasti
pantava kristillisen yhteiskunnan koko seuraavan kehityksen
suoranaiseksi ja tärkeimmäksi päämääräksi.

— Aivan oikein, — lausui lujasti ja hermostuneesti isä Paísi,

harvapuheinen ja oppinut pappismunkki.

— Puhtainta ultramontaanisuutta! — huudahti Miusov asettaen

kärsimättömästi jalan toisen jalkansa päälle.

— Heh, eihän meillä ole vuoriakaan! — huudahti isä Josef ja jatkoi

kääntyen luostarinvanhimman puoleen: — He vastaavat muun
muassa vastustajansa, hengelliseen säätyyn kuuluvan henkilön —
huomatkaa se — seuraaviin »oleellisiin ja perusmielipiteisiin».
Ensiksi: siihen, että »ei yksikään yhteiskunnallinen liittymä voi eikä
sen pidä omistaa itselleen valtaa — käyttää jäsentensä kansalais- ja
valtiollisia oikeuksia». Toiseksi: että »rikosoikeudellinen ja
siviilioikeudellinen tuomiovalta ei saa kuulua kirkolle eikä ole
sopusoinnussa sen luonteen kanssa, se kun on jumalallinen laitos ja
ihmisten yhteenliittymä uskonnollisia tarkoitusperiä varten». Ja
vihdoin kolmanneksi: siihen, että »kirkko on valtakunta, joka ei ole
tästä maailmasta»…

— Mitä arvottominta sanoilla leikkimistä pappismiehen puolelta! —

keskeytti taas isä Paísi malttamatta olla ääneti. — Minä olen lukenut
tämän kirjan, jota vastaan te olette esittänyt väitteitä, — sanoi hän
kääntyen Ivan Fjodorovitšin puoleen, — ja minua ihmetyttivät
hengenmiehen sanat, että »kirkko on valtakunta, joka ei ole tästä
maailmasta». Jos se ei ole tästä maailmasta, niin sitä siis ei voi olla
maan päällä ollenkaan olemassa. Pyhän evankeliumin sanoja: »ei
tästä maailmasta» on käytetty väärässä merkityksessä. Tuollaisilla
sanoilla leikkiminen ei käy laatuun. Meidän Herramme Jeesus
Kristus tuli nimenomaan perustamaan kirkkoa maan päälle. Taivaan
valtakunta tietysti ei ole tästä maailmasta, se on taivaassa, mutta
siihen ei voi päästä muuta tietä kuin kirkon kautta, joka on perustettu
ja asetettu maan päälle. Ja sentähden ovat maalliset sanaleikit tässä
mielessä mahdottomia ja arvottomia. Kirkko on todellakin valtakunta,
ja sen määränä on hallita, ja lopulta sen täytyy epäilemättä olla
valtakuntana koko maan päällä, — siitä on meillä olemassa lupaus…

Hän vaikeni äkkiä aivan kuin hilliten mieltään. Ivan Fjodorovitš,

joka oli kuunnellut häntä kunnioittavasti ja tarkkaavasti, jatkoi erittäin
levollisesti, mutta edelleenkin halukkaasti ja vilpittömästi,
luostarinvanhimman puoleen kääntyen:

— Minun kirjoitukseni pääajatus on se, että muinoin kristityn ajan

ensimmäisinä kolmena vuosisatana kristillisyys maan päällä ilmeni
vain kirkkona ja oli vain kirkko. Mutta kun Rooman pakanallinen
valtakunta tahtoi tulla kristityksi, niin kävi pakostakin niin, että
tultuaan kristityksi se vain sulki itseensä kirkon, mutta jäi edelleen
entiseen tapaan pakanalliseksi valtakunnaksi hyvin monissa
toimissaan. Todellisuudessa epäilemättä pitikin näin käydä. Mutta
Roomassa valtiona säilyi sangen paljon pakanallista sivistystä ja
viisautta, kuten esimerkiksi itse valtion tarkoitusperät ja perusteet.
Kristuksen kirkko taas ei valtioon astuttuaan epäilemättä voinut
luovuttaa mitään perustastaan, siitä kivestä, jolle se rakentuu, eikä
voinut tavoitella muuta kuin omia tarkoitusperiään, jotka Herra itse
kerran sille oli määrännyt ja osoittanut, muun muassa: muuttaa koko
maailma ja siis koko muinainen pakanallinen valtio kirkoksi. Näin
ollen (tulevaisuuteen nähden) ei kirkon tule etsiä itselleen määrättyä
paikkaa valtiossa niinkuin »jokainen yhteiskunnallinen liittymä» tai
»ihmisten yhtymä uskonnollisia tarkoitusperiä varten» (kuten kirkosta
lausuu tekijä, jota vastaan väittelen), vaan päinvastoin jokaisen
maallisen valtion pitäisi vastaisuudessa täydelleen muuttua kirkoksi
eikä olla mitään muuta kuin vain kirkko sekä luopua kaikista
päämääristään, jotka eivät ole sopusoinnussa kirkollisten kanssa.
Eikä tämä kaikki millään tavoin sitä alenna, ei riistä sen arvoa ja
kunniaa suurena valtiona, ei sen valtiaitten kunniaa, vaan ainoastaan
johdattaa sen valheelliselta, vielä pakanalliselta ja väärältä tieltä sille
ainoalle oikealle ja totiselle tielle, joka vie iäisiin päämääriin.
Tämänpä vuoksi »Kirkollis-yhteiskunnallisen tuomioistuimen
perusteet» nimisen kirjan tekijä arvostelisi oikein, jos hän etsiessään
ja esitellessään noita perusteita pitäisi niitä väliaikaisena, meidän
syntisenä ja täyttymisen hetkestä kaukana olevana aikanamme vielä
välttämättömänä kompromissina eikä minään muuna. Mutta heti kun
näitten perusteitten keksijä uskaltaa julistaa, että perusteet, joita hän
nyt esittää ja joista osan äsken juuri isä Josef luetteli, ovat
järkähtämättömiä, alkuaineisia ja ikuisia perusteita, niin hän
suorastaan on ristiriidassa kirkon sekä sen pyhän, ikuisen ja
järkähtämättömän tehtävän kanssa. Siinä on koko kirjoitelmani,
täydellinen selostus siitä.

— Se on lyhyesti sanoen, — alkoi isä Paísi taas puhua pannen

painoa joka sanalle, — että eräitten teoriain mukaan, jotka ovat kovin
hyvin selvinneet yhdeksännellätoista vuosisadallamme, kirkon on
muututtava valtioksi aivan kuin kehittyen alemmasta olotilasta
korkeampaan ja sitten hävittävä siihen väistyen tieteen, ajanhengen
ja sivistyksen tieltä. Jos se ei tahdo sitä tehdä ja panee vastaan, niin
sille suodaan sen takia valtiossa vain jokin nurkka, ja siinäkin se on
valvonnan alaisena. Näin on kaikkialla meidän aikanamme
nykyaikaisissa eurooppalaisissa maissa. Venäläisen käsitystavan ja
vahvan toivon mukaan taas ei kirkon ole muututtava valtioksi
ikäänkuin kehittyen alemmasta tyypistä korkeammaksi, vaan
päinvastoin valtion pitää lopulta päästä siihen, että se voi muuttua
ainoastaan kirkoksi eikä miksikään muuksi. Niin tapahtuukin, niin
tapahtuu!

— No, myönnänpä teidän nyt minua hiukan rohkaisseen, —

naurahti Miusov siirtäen taas toisen jalkansa toisen päälle. — Mikäli
ymmärrän, on tässä siis kysymyksessä jonkin äärettömän kaukaisen
ihanteen toteuttaminen tulevan ajan jälkeen. Kernaasti minun
puolestani. Ihana haaveellinen unelma sotien, diplomaattien,
pankkien y.m. katoamisesta. Jotakin semmoista, mikä muistuttaa
sosialismiakin. Minä luulen, että se oli vakava asia ja että kirkko nyt
esimerkiksi rupeaa tuomitsemaan rikosasioissa ja määräämään
raippoja ja pakkotyötä, ehkäpä myös julistamaan kuolemantuomioita.

— Jos nyt jo olisi olemassa vain kirkollisyhteiskunnallinen

tuomioistuin, niin kirkko ei nytkään lähettäisi pakkotyöhön eikä
tuomitsisi kuolemaan. Rikoksen ja mielipiteitten siitä täytyisi silloin
epäilemättä muuttua, tietysti vähitellen, ei äkkiä ja heti, mutta
kuitenkin jokseenkin pian… — lausui Ivan Fjodorovitš rauhallisesti ja
silmää räpäyttämättä.

— Tosissanneko te? — kysyi Miusov katsoen häneen pitkään.

— Jos kaikki olisi kirkkoa, niin kirkko erottaisi yhteydestään

rikollisen ja tottelemattoman, mutta ei silloin hakkaisi ihmisiltä päätä
pois, — jatkoi Ivan Fjodorovitš. — Kysyn teiltä, mihin tuolla tavoin
pannaanjulistettu menisi? Silloinhan hänen pitäisi poistua ei vain
ihmisten yhteydestä, kuten nyt, vaan myös Kristuksen yhteydestä.
Hänhän ei olisi rikoksellaan noussut kapinaan ainoastaan ihmisiä,
vaan myöskin Kristuksen kirkkoa vastaan. Onhan tarkasti ottaen
asian laita nytkin niin, mutta sitä ei ole kuitenkaan julistettu, ja
nykyajan rikoksentekijän omatunto ryhtyy usein ja useimmiten
tinkimään: »varastin, mutta en toimi kirkkoa vastaan, en ole
Kristuksen vihollinen», näin puhelee itselleen nykyajan rikollinen aina
ja kaikkialla, no, mutta kun kirkko tulee valtion sijalle, silloin hänen
olisi vaikeata sanoa näin, jos ei tahdo kieltää koko kirkkoa koko
maan päällä: »kaikki (muka) erehtyvät, kaikki ovat joutuneet
harhaan, kaikki kuuluvat valheelliseen kirkkoon, minä, murhaaja ja
varas, yksinäni muodostan oikean kristillisen kirkon». Onhan hyvin
vaikeata sanoa itselleen näin, se vaatii harvinaisen suuria
mahdollisuuksia sekä semmoisia olosuhteita, jommoisia ei usein
satu. Asettukaapa nyt toiselta puolen kirkon katsantokannalle
rikokseen nähden: eikö nykyisen, miltei pakanallisen katsantokannan
pidä muuttua toiseksi, ja eikö sen sijaan, että taudin saastuttama
jäsen mekaanisesti hakataan pois, niinkuin nykyisin tehdään
yhteiskunnan varjelemiseksi, ole tuleva, vieläpä täydellisesti eikä
valheellisesti, ihmisen uudestisyntymisen aate, hänen
ylösnousemuksensa ja pelastuksensa aate…

— Mitä tuo toisin sanoen oikein on? En taaskaan enää ymmärrä,

— keskeytti Miusov, — taaskin jokin haave! Se on jotakin
muodotonta, jota ei voi ymmärtääkään. Millainen yhteydestä
erottaminen, mikä pannaanjulistus? Epäilenpä, että te vain puhelette
huviksenne, Ivan Fjodorovitš.

— Oikeastaanhan on asia nytkin aivan samalla tavalla, — alkoi

yht'äkkiä luostarinvanhin puhua, ja kaikki kääntyivät heti häneen
päin. — Jos nimittäin nyt ei olisi Kristuksen kirkkoa, niin ei olisi
mitään, mikä pidättäisi rikollista pahasta teosta, eikä edes
rangaistusta rikoksesta, nimittäin todellista rangaistusta, ei
mekaanista, kuten he äsken juuri sanoivat, joka mekaaninen
rangaistus useimmissa tapauksissa vain vihoittaa sydämen, vaan
puuttuisi todellinen rangaistus, se, joka yksin vaikuttaa, joka yksin
peloittaa ja sovittaa, nimittäin oman omantunnon tietoisuus.

— Kuinka siis tarkoitatte, saanko kysyä? — kysyi Miusov osoittaen

mitä vilkkainta mielenkiintoa.

— Kas tällä tavalla, — alkoi vanhus. — Kaikki nuo pakkotyöhön

lähettämiset, joihin ennen liittyi pieksäminen, eivät paranna ketään
eivätkä, mikä on tärkeintä, peloita juuri ainoatakaan rikoksentekijää,
eikä rikosten lukumäärä ollenkaan vähene, vaan on aikojen kuluessa
yhä kasvanut. Täytyyhän teidän olla samaa mieltä. Ja tulokseksi
tulee, että yhteiskuntaa ei tällä tavalla ollenkaan saada varjelluksi,
sillä vaikka vahingollinen jäsen hakataankin pois mekaanisesti ja
lähetetään kauas pois näkyvistä, niin hänen sijaansa ilmestyy heti
uusi rikollinen tai mahdollisesti kaksikin. Jos mikään suojelee
yhteiskuntaa meidänkin aikanamme ja myös parantaa
rikoksentekijän tehden hänestä uuden ihmisen, niin se taaskin on
ainoastaan Kristuksen laki, joka tunnetaan omassatunnossa. Vain
tuntiessaan syyllisyytensä Kristuksen yhteiskunnan, toisin sanoen
kirkon poikana rikollinen voi tuntea syyllisyytensä itse
yhteiskunnankin, se on kirkon, edessä. Näin ollen nykyaikainen
rikoksentekijä kykenee ainoastaan kirkon edessä tuntemaan
syyllisyytensä eikä valtion edessä. Jos nyt yhteiskunta kirkkona
käyttäisi tuomiovaltaa, niin silloin se tietäisi, kenet se voi vapauttaa
pannasta ja ottaa taas yhteyteensä. Nyt sensijaan kirkko, jolla ei ole
minkäänlaista varsinaista tuomiovaltaa, vaan ainoastaan siveellisen
tuomitsemisen mahdollisuus, vetäytyy itsekin pois rikollisen
tehokkaasta rankaisemisesta. Kirkko ei erota rikoksentekijää
yhteydestään, ei jätä häntä ilman isällistä ohjaustaan. Vieläpä
enemmänkin: se koettaa säilyttää rikollisen kanssa kaiken kristillisen
kirkollisen yhteyden, päästää hänet kirkollisiin jumalanpalveluksiin ja
osalliseksi pyhistä sakramenteista, antaa hänelle almuja ja kohtelee
häntä enemmän epävapaan kuin syyllisen tavoin. Ja miten
kävisikään rikollisen, oi Jumala! jos kristillinen yhteiskuntakin, toisin
sanoen kirkko, hylkäisi hänet samalla tavoin kuin hänet hylkää ja
hakkaa pois maallinen laki? Miten kävisi, jos kirkkokin rankaisisi
häntä yhteydestään erottamisella heti ja joka kerta kun valtio on
antanut tuomionsa? Ei voisi joutua syvempään epätoivoon ainakaan
venäläinen rikoksentekijä, sillä venäläiset rikoksentekijät vielä
uskovat. Kukapa muuten tietää: kenties silloin tapahtuisi kauhea
asia, — rikollisen epätoivoisesta sydämestä kenties katoaisi usko, ja
mikä siitä olisi seurauksena? Mutta kirkko hellänä ja rakastavana
äitinä itse luopuu käyttämästä tehokasta rangaistusta, koska valtion
tuomioistuin on jo ilman kirkon rangaistusta liian kipeästi rangaissut
syyllistä, ja edes jonkun täytyy häntä sääliä. Mutta etupäässä se
luopuu rangaistuksesta sen tähden, että kirkon tuomio on ainoa
tuomio, johon sisältyy totuus, eikä se tämän vuoksi voi oleellisesti
eikä siveellisesti yhtyä mihinkään toiseen tuomioon, ei edes
väliaikaiseen kompromissiin. Tässä ei voi enää ruveta tinkimään.
Ulkomainen rikollinen, niin kerrotaan, harvoin katuu, sillä kaikkein
nykyaikaisimmatkin opit vahvistavat sitä hänen ajatustaan, että
hänen rikoksensa ei ole rikos, vaan ainoastaan
epäoikeudenmukaisesti häntä sortavan voiman vastustamista.
Yhteiskunta hakkaa hänet irti itsestään täysin mekaanisesti
voimallaan, joka on suurempi kuin hänen, ja tämän erottamisen
lisäksi se vihaa häntä (näin he ainakin itse kertovat itsestään
Euroopassa), — vihaa ja on täysin välinpitämätön hänen
myöhemmästä kohtalostaan ja unohtaa hänet, veljensä. Näin kaikki
tapahtuu ilman vähintäkään kirkollista sääliä, sillä useissa
tapauksissa ei siellä enää ollenkaan ole kirkkoja, on jäänyt jäljelle
vain kirkon miehiä ja komeita kirkkorakennuksia, mutta itse kirkot
ovat jo kauan pyrkineet siirtymään alemmasta, kirkon muodosta
ylempään, valtion muotoon, hävitäkseen kokonaan siihen. Niin
näyttää olevan asian laita ainakin luterilaisissa maissa. Roomassa
on näin jo tuhat vuotta ollut kirkon sijalla valtio. Siksi rikoksentekijä
itse ei enää käsitä olevansa kirkon jäsen ja erillään siitä on
epätoivoinen. Jos hän taas palaa yhteiskuntaan, niin hän usein on
täynnä niin suurta vihaa, että itse yhteiskunta tavallaan erottaa hänet
yhteydestään. Miten tämä päättyy, sen voitte itse ymmärtää. Useissa
tapauksissa näyttävät meillä asiat olevan samalla tavoin. Mutta
siinäpä se onkin, että meillä paitsi tavallisia tuomioistuimia sen
lisäksi vielä on kirkkokin, joka ei koskaan menetä yhteyttään
rikollisen kanssa, pitää häntä rakkaana ja yhä edelleenkin
kallisarvoisena poikanaan, ja tämän lisäksi on olemassa ja säilyy,
vaikkapa vain ajateltuna, myöskin kirkon tuomiovalta, jota tosin nyt ei
käytetä, mutta joka yhä elää tulevaisuutta varten, jos ei muuten niin
unelmana, ja jonka itse rikoksentekijäkin epäilemättä sydämensä
vaiston vaikutuksesta tunnustaa. Totta on sekin, mitä täällä äsken
sanottiin, nimittäin että jos kirkon tuomiovalta todellakin tulisi
käytäntöön kaikessa voimassaan, toisin sanoen, jos koko
yhteiskunta muuttuisi vain kirkoksi, niin kirkon tuomio vaikuttaisi
rikollisen parantumiseen aivan toisenlaisessa määrässä kuin mitä se
nyt tekee, vieläpä kenties tosiaan rikosten lukumääräkin vähenisi
uskomattoman pieneksi. Ja kirkkokin, siitä ei ole epäilystä,
ymmärtäisi tulevaisuudessa rikollisen ja tulevaisuuden rikoksen
monissa tapauksissa aivan toisin kuin nyt ja osaisi palauttaa erotetun
yhteyteensä, ehkäistä rikosta suunnittelevan teon ja saada
langenneen uudestisyntymään. Tosin, — vanhus hymähti, —
kristillinen yhteiskunta ei nyt vielä itsekään ole valmis ja on vain
seitsemän vanhurskaan varassa, mutta koska nämä eivät väsy, niin
se pysyy yhä järkähtämättömänä odotuksessaan, että se
täydellisesti uudistuu siten, että yhteiskunnasta, joka on vielä miltei
pakanallinen liitto, tulee yksi ainoa, yleismaailmallinen ja hallitseva
kirkko. Niin tapahtuukin, tapahtuu, vaikkapa vasta aikojen lopussa,
sillä vain tämä on määrätty tapahtumaan! Eikä ole syytä olla levoton
aikojen ja määrähetkien takia, sillä ajat ja hetket määrää Jumalan
viisaus, Hänen kaikkitietäväisyytensä ja Hänen rakkautensa. Ja mikä
inhimillisen arvioinnin mukaan kenties vielä on hyvinkin kaukana, se
saattaa Jumalan ennaltamääräyksen mukaan olla toteutumisensa
aaton edessä, aivan ovella. Tämä viimeksimainittu tapahtuu,
tapahtuu.

— Tapahtuu! Tapahtuu! — vakuutti hartaasti ja vakavana isä Paísi.

— Omituista, mitä suurimmassa määrässä omituista! — lausui

Miusov ei vain kiihkeästi, vaan ikäänkuin salaa mielessään
paheksuen.

— Mikä teistä näyttää niin omituiselta? — tiedusti isä Josef

varovasti.

— Mitä tämä sitten oikein on? — huudahti Miusov aivan kuin olisi
äkkiä alkanut purkaa mieltään. — Maan päältä poistetaan valtio, ja
kirkko koroitetaan valtion arvoon! Tämä ei ole enää
ultramontaanisuutta, tämä on enemmän kuin ultramontaanisuutta!
Paavi Gregorius seitsemäs ei olisi osannut uneksia tuommoisesta!

— Suvaitsette ymmärtää aivan päinvastoin! — lausui isä Paísi

ankarasti. — Ei kirkko muutu valtioksi, ymmärtäkää se. Se on
Rooma ja sen unelma. Se on perkeleen kolmas viettelys.
Päinvastoin valtio muuttuu kirkoksi, kohoaa kirkon tasalle ja tulee
kirkoksi koko maan päällä, — mikä on aivan päinvastaista kuin
ultramontaanisuus ja Rooma ja teidän tulkintanne, ja siinä on
oikeauskoisuuden suuri tehtävä maan päällä. Idästä tämä tähti
nousee.

Miusov vaikeni merkitsevästi. Koko hänen muotonsa ilmaisi

tavatonta oman arvon tuntoa. Ylpeän alentuvainen hymy ilmestyi
hänen huulilleen. Aljoša seurasi kaikkea kovasti sykkivin sydämin.
Koko tämä keskustelu kuohutti häntä sydämen pohjaa myöten. Hän
sattui katsahtamaan Rakitiniin. Tämä seisoi liikkumatta entisellä
paikallaan oven suussa kuunnellen ja katsellen kaikkea
tarkkaavaisesti, vaikka silmät olivatkin alas luodut. Mutta poskien
hehkuvasta punasta Aljoša arvasi, että Rakitinkin oli kuohuksissaan,
nähtävästi yhtä paljon kuin hänkin. Aljoša tiesi, miksi hän oli levoton.

— Sallikaa minun kertoa teille eräs pikku anekdootti, hyvät herrat,

— lausui äkkiä Miusov merkitsevästi ja omituisella tavalla arvokkaan
näköisenä. — Pariisissa minä muutama vuosi sitten, kohta joulukuun
kumouksen jälkeen, kävin tervehtimässä erästä tuttuani, erittäin
huomattavaa ja siihen aikaan johtavassa asemassa olevaa henkilöä,
ja kohtasin hänen luonaan erään sangen mielenkiintoisen herran.
Tämä individi oli jonkinmoinen valtiollisen poliisikomennuskunnan
päällikkö, omalla tavallaan varsin vaikutusvaltainen virkamies.
Käyttäen tilaisuutta hyväkseni minä tyydyttääkseni suurta
uteliaisuuttani ryhdyin hänen kanssaan puheisiin. Koska hän ei ollut
tullut taloon tuttuna, vaan alemmassa asemassa olevana
virkamiehenä, joka oli tullut antamaan määrätynlaatuisen
selostuksen, niin hän puolestaan, nähdessään, millä tavoin hänen
esimiehensä suhtautui minuun, oli minua kohtaan jonkin verran
avomielinen, — no, tietysti vain jossakin määrin, hän oli, niin
sanoakseni, pikemmin kohtelias kuin avomielinen, juuri sillä tavoin
kuin ranskalaiset osaavat olla kohteliaita, sitäkin suuremmalla syyllä,
kun hän näki, että olin muukalainen. Mutta minä ymmärsin hänet
hyvin hyvästi. Oli puhe sosialistivallankumouksellisista, joita silloin
muun muassa vainottiin. Jättäen syrjään keskustelun varsinaisen
sisällyksen mainitsen nyt vain yhden sangen mielenkiintoisen
huomautuksen, joka äkkiä pääsi tuon herrasmiehen suusta: »Me»,
sanoi hän, »oikeastaan emme kovin paljon pelkää kaikkia noita
sosialisteja, anarkisteja, jumalankieltäjiä ja vallankumouksellisia. Me
pidämme heitä silmällä ja tunnemme heidän pyrkimyksensä. Mutta
heidän joukossaan on, vaikkakin vain pieni määrä, jonkin verran
erikoisia ihmisiä: ne uskovat Jumalaan ja ovat kristittyjä, mutta
samalla he myös ovat sosialisteja. Näitäpä juuri me eniten
pelkäämme, ne ovat peloittavaa väkeä! Kristitty sosialisti on
peloittavampi kuin jumalankieltäjä sosialisti.» Nuo sanat
hämmästyttivät jo silloin minua, ja nyt teidän luonanne, hyvät herrat,
ne äkkiä johtuivat mieleeni…

— Siis te sovitatte ne meihin ja pidätte meitä sosialisteina? —

kysyi isä Paísi suoraan ja kiertelemättä. Mutta ennenkuin Pjotr
Aleksandrovitš pääsi selville, mitä hän vastaisi, avautui ovi ja sisään
astui Dmitri Fjodorovitš, joka oli näin paljon myöhästynyt. Häntä oli
oikeastaan jo lakattu odottamasta, ja hänen äkillinen saapumisensa
synnytti ensihetkessä jonkin verran ihmettelyäkin.

6.

Miksi sellainen ihminen elää!

 Dmitri Fjodorovitš, kahdenkymmenenkahdeksan vuoden ikäinen
nuori mies, joka oli keskikokoinen ja jolla oli miellyttävät kasvot,
näytti paljon vanhemmalta kuin oli. Hän oli vahvajäntereinen, ja
saattoi nähdä, että hänellä oli huomattavat ruumiinvoimat, mutta
kuitenkin hänen kasvoissaan kuvastui jotakin sairaalloista. Hänen
kasvonsa olivat laihat, posket olivat kuopalla, ja niiden värissä oli
sairaalloisen keltainen vivahdus. Suurenpuoleiset, tummat,
pullottavat silmät näyttivät katselevan lujan itsepintaisesti, mutta
niiden katse oli samalla jollakin tavoin epämääräinen. Silloinkaan
kun hän oli kiihdyksissä ja puhui suuttuneesti, ei hänen katseensa
oikein näyttänyt mukaantuvan hänen sisäisen mielentilansa mukaan,
vaan ilmaisi jotakin muuta, toisinaan semmoista, mikä ei ollenkaan
ollut siihen hetkeen kuuluvaa. »On vaikea tietää, mitä hän ajattelee»,
sanoivat joskus ne, jotka puhelivat hänen kanssaan. Tapahtui, että
jotkut, jotka näkivät hänen silmissään jotakin miettivää ja juroa, äkkiä
hämmästyivät hänen odottamatonta nauruaan, joka todisti hänen
ajatelleen jotakin iloista ja leikillistä juuri silloin, kun hän oli niin juron
näköinen. Muuten saattoi jossakin määrin sairaalloinen leima hänen
kasvoissaan tällä hetkellä olla ymmärrettävä: kaikki tiesivät tai olivat
kuulleet erittäin remuisasta ja »ryypiskelevästä» elämästä, johon hän
juuri viime aikoina oli antautunut, samoinkuin kaikki tunsivat sen
tavattoman kiihtymyksen, jonka valtaan hän oli joutunut riidellessään
isänsä kanssa kiistanalaisista rahoista. Kaupungilla kerrottiin jo
useita juttuja siitä. Totta oli, että hän kyllä jo luonnostaankin oli
ärtyisä, »hillitön ja epäsäännöllinen älyltään», kuten hänestä
kuvaavasti lausui rauhantuomarimme Semjon Ivanovitš Katšaljnikov
eräässä seurassa. Hän astui sisälle moitteettomasti ja muodikkaasti
puettuna, nuttu kiinninapitettuna, käsissä mustat hansikkaat ja
silkkihattu. Äskettäin palveluksesta eronneena sotilaana hän oli
antanut viiksiensä kasvaa ja ajanut partansa. Hänen tummanruskea
tukkansa oli lyhyeksi leikattu ja sillä tavoin kammattu, että ohimoilla
olevat hiukset olivat eteenpäin kääntyneet. Hän kulki päättävästi,
leveästi, niinkuin rintamassa. Hetkeksi hän pysähtyi kynnykselle ja
luotuaan silmäyksen kaikkiin meni suoraan luostarinvanhimman luo
arvaten, että hän oli isäntä. Hän kumarsi syvään vanhukselle ja pyysi
siunausta. Vanhus nousi seisomaan ja siunasi häntä. Dmitri
Fjodorovitš suuteli kunnioittavasti hänen kättään ja lausui hyvin
kiihtyneenä, melkein suutuksissaan:

— Suokaa hyväntahtoisesti anteeksi, että olen antanut näin kauan

odottaa! Mutta palvelija Smerdjakov, jonka isäukko lähetti, vastasi,
kun täsmällisesti kysyin häneltä aikaa, minulle kaksi kertaa hyvin
varmalla äänellä, että on määrätty kello yhdeksi. Nyt saan äkkiä
kuulla…

— Älkää olko millännekään, — keskeytti luostarinvanhin, — ei tee

mitään, viivästyitte hiukan, ei se haittaa…

— Olen teille erittäin kiitollinen enkä vähempää voinut odottaakaan

hyvyydeltänne. — Tokaistuaan tämän lauselman Dmitri Fjodorovitš
kumarsi vielä kerran, kääntyi sitten äkkiä »isäukkoonsa» päin ja
kumarsi tällekin yhtä kunnioittavasti ja syvään. Näkyi, että hän oli
harkinnut tuon kumarruksen jo edeltäpäin ja päättänyt sen
vilpittömällä mielellä pitäen velvollisuutenaan sillä tavoin ilmaista
kunnioituksensa ja hyvät aikomuksensa. Fjodor Pavlovitš, vaikka
tämä olikin hänelle yllätys, säilytti kuitenkin omalla tavallaan
mielenmalttinsa: Dmitri Fjodorovitšin kumarruksen johdosta hän
hypähti seisomaan ja vastasi pojalleen yhtä syvällä kumarruksella.
Hänen kasvonsa tulivat äkkiä arvokkaan ja vakavan näköisiksi, mikä
kuitenkin teki hänet ehdottomasti häijyn näköiseksi. Tervehdittyään
sitten yhteisesti kaikkia huoneessa-olijoita kumarruksella Dmitri
Fjodorovitš astui pitkin ja päättäväisin askelin ikkunan luo, istuutui
ainoalle vapaana olevalle tuolille isä Paísin läheisyyteen ja ojentaen
koko ruumistaan tuolilla eteenpäin valmistautui heti kuuntelemaan
keskeyttämänsä keskustelun jatkoa.

Dmitri Fjodorovitšin tulo ei ollut vienyt kuin pari minuuttia, ja

keskustelun täytyi viritä uudelleen. Mutta isä Paísin itsepintaiseen ja
miltei ärsyttävään kysymykseen ei. Pjotr Aleksandrovitš tällä kertaa
katsonut tarpeelliseksi vastata.

— Sallikaa minun jättää tämä puheenaihe, — lausui hän

jonkinmoisella maailmanmiehen huolimattomuudella. — Sitäpaitsi
tämä aihe ei ole mutkallinen. Tuossa Ivan Fjodorovitš hymähtelee
meille: luultavasti hänellä on jotakin mielenkiintoista lausuttavana
tästäkin kohdasta. Kysykää häneltä.

— Ei mitään erikoista, vain pieni huomautus, — vastasi heti Ivan

Fjodorovitš, — ja se koskee sitä, että yleensä eurooppalainen
liberalismi ja myös meikäläinen venäläinen liberaalinen diletantismi
usein ja jo kauan on sekoittanut sosialismin ja kristinopin lopulliset
tulokset toisiinsa. Tämä kummallinen johtopäätös on tietysti kuvaava
piirre. Muuten eivät sosialismia ja kristinoppia sekoita, kuten on
nähty, ainoastaan liberaalit ja diletantit, vaan yhdessä heidän
kanssaan monissa tapauksissa myös santarmit, tietysti
ulkomaalaiset. Teidän pariisilainen anekdoottinne on varsin
luonteenomainen, Pjotr Aleksandrovitš.

— Yleensä pyydän vieläkin saada jättää tämän kysymyksen, —

toisti Pjotr Aleksandrovitš, — ja sen sijaan minä kerron teille, hyvät
herrat, toisen anekdootin Ivan Fjodorovitšista itsestään, sangen
kiintoisan ja kuvaavan. Siitä ei ole sen enempää kuin viisi päivää,
kun eräässä täkäläisessä seurassa, jossa oli etupäässä naisia, hän
väitellessään juhlallisesti julisti, että koko maailmassa ei ole
olemassa kerrassaan mitään, mikä saisi ihmiset rakastamaan
kaltaisiaan, että sellaista luonnonlakia, joka panisi ihmisen
rakastamaan ihmiskuntaa, ei ensinkään ole olemassa ja että jos on
ja tähän saakka on ollut rakkautta maan päällä, niin sitä ei ole ollut
luonnonlain vaikutuksesta, vaan yksinomaan sen vuoksi, että ihmiset
ovat uskoneet omaan kuolemattomuuteensa. Ivan Fjodorovitš lisäsi
samalla sivumennen, että siinä juuri koko luonnonlaki onkin, niin että
jos hävitätte ihmiskunnasta uskon kuolemattomuuteensa, niin
samassa loppuu sekä rakkaus että kaikki muukin elävä voima, joka
tekee kykeneväksi jatkamaan maallista elämää. Eikä siinä kyllin:
silloin ei enää ole olemassa mitään epäsiveellistä, kaikki on sallittua,
yksinpä antropofagia. Eikä vielä siinäkään kyllin, vaan hän vakuutti
lopuksi, että jokaisen yksityisen ihmisen kohdalta, esimerkiksi
semmoisten kuin me nyt, joka ei usko Jumalaan eikä omaan
kuolemattomuuteensa, luonnollisen siveyslain täytyy heti muuttua
täydelliseksi vastakohdaksi entiselle, uskonnolliselle, ja että aina
konnuuteen asti menevä itsekkyys on jokaiselle ihmiselle luvallinen,
vieläpä se juuri on tunnustettava välttämättömäksikin, kaikkein
järkevimmäksi ja melkeinpä jaloimmaksi ratkaisuksi hänen
asemassaan. Tämmöisestä paradoksista voitte päätellä, hyvät
herrat, millaista on kaikki muu, mitä suvaitsee julistaa ja mitä ehkä
kauankin aikoo julistaa rakas eksentrikkomme ja paradoksalistimme
Ivan Fjodorovitš.

— Sallikaa kysyä, — huudahti aivan odottamatta Dmitri

Fjodorovitš, — jotta en kuulisi väärin: »konnuutta ei ainoastaan ole
sallittava, vaan se on tunnustettava kaikkein välttämättömimmäksi ja
järkevimmäksi ratkaisuksi jokaisen jumalankieltäjän asemassa»!
Oliko se niin vai eikö?
 — Juuri niin, — sanoi isä Paísi.

— Panen sen mieleeni.

Tämän lausuttuaan Dmitri Fjodorovitš vaikeni yhtä äkkiä kuin oli

puuttunut keskusteluun. Kaikki katsoivat häneen uteliaina.

— Onko teillä todellakin tuollainen vakaumus siitä, mitä seuraa,

jos ihmiset menettävät uskon sielunsa kuolemattomuuteen? — kysyi
äkkiä luostarinvanhin Ivan Fjodorovitšilta.

— Niin, sitä minä vakuutin. Ei ole hyvettä, jos ei ole

kuolemattomuutta.

— Onnellinen te, jos niin uskotte, tai sitten hyvin onneton!

— Minkä tähden onneton? — kysyi Ivan Fjodorovitš hymyillen.

— Sen tähden, että luultavasti itse ette usko sielunne

kuolemattomuuteen ettekä edes siihen, mitä kirjoititte kirkosta ja
kirkollisesta kysymyksestä.

— Kenties olette oikeassa!… Mutta kuitenkaan minä en puhunut

myöskään vain pilaa… — lausui äkkiä Ivan Fjodorovitš tehden
omituisen tunnustuksen ja äkkiä punastuen.

— Ette puhunut vain pilaa, se on totta. Tämä idea ei ole vielä

selvinnyt teidän sydämessänne ja kiusaa sitä. Mutta kiusatustakin on
toisinaan hauskaa huvitella epätoivollaan aivan kuin tekisi sen
epätoivoissaan. Toistaiseksi epätoivo saa teidätkin huvittelemaan —
sekä aikakauslehtiin kirjoittamalla että väittelemällä seuroissa, vaikka
ette usko omaa dialektiikkaanne, vaan kirvelevin sydämin nauratte
sille itseksenne… Teissä tämä kysymys ei vielä ole ratkaistu, ja siinä
on teidän suuri surunne, sillä se vaatii välttämättömästi ratkaisua…

— Mutta voiko se minussa tulla ratkaistuksi? Myönteiseen

suuntaan ratkaistuksi? — jatkoi Ivan Fjodorovitš omituista kyselyään
katsellen kaiken aikaa vanhusta selittämätön hymy huulillaan.

— Jos ei voi tulla ratkaisua myönteiseen suuntaan, niin ei koskaan

tule ratkaisua myöskään kielteiseen suuntaan, tunnettehan itse
tämän sydämenne ominaisuuden, ja siinäpä koko sen kärsimys
onkin. Mutta kiittäkää Luojaa, joka on antanut teille ylevän sydämen,
semmoisen, joka kykenee tuollaista kärsimystä tuntemaan,
»tavoitella ja etsiä niitä, kuin ylhäällä ovat, sillä meidän
asuinpaikkamme on taivaassa». Suokoon Jumala teidän sydämenne
päästä ratkaisuun jo maan päällä ja siunatkoon Jumala teidän
tienne!

Vanhus kohotti kätensä ja aikoi paikaltaan siunata ristinmerkillä

Ivan Fjodorovitšia. Mutta tämä nousi äkkiä tuoliltaan, astui hänen
luokseen, otti vastaan hänen siunauksensa ja suudeltuaan hänen
kättään palasi äänettömänä paikalleen. Hän oli lujan ja vakavan
näköinen. Tämä teko ja koko edellinen keskustelu vanhuksen
kanssa, jommoista ei Ivan Fjodorovitšilta voitu odottaa,
hämmästyttivät kaikkia salaperäisyydellään ja eräänlaisella
juhlallisuudellaan, niin että kaikki vaikenivat hetken ajaksi ja Aljošan
kasvoissa kuvastui miltei pelästys. Mutta äkkiä Miusov kohautti
olkapäitään, ja samalla hetkellä Fjodor Pavlovitš hypähti tuoliltaan.

— Jumalallinen ja pyhä vanhus! — huudahti hän ja osoitti Ivan

Fjodorovitšia. — Tämä on minun poikani, liha minun lihastani, minun
rakkain jälkeläiseni! Tämä on minun mitä kunnioitettavin, niin
sanoakseni, Karl Moor, mutta tuo poikani, joka juuri tuli sisälle, Dmitri
Fjodorovitš, ja jota vastaan etsin teiltä oikeutta, — hän on kaikkea
muuta kuin kunnioitettava Franz Moor, — molemmat Schillerin
Rosvoista, kun taas minä itse näin ollen olen Regierender Graf von
Moor! Tuomitkaa ja pelastakaa! Emme tarvitse ainoastaan
rukouksianne, vaan myöskin profeetallista toimintaanne.

— Puhukaa hassuttelematta, älkääkä aloittako loukkaamalla

omaisianne, — vastasi vanhus heikolla, väsyneellä äänellä.
Nähtävästi hän alkoi uupua yhä enemmän ja hänen voimansa olivat
ilmeisesti loppumassa.

— Arvotonta ilveilyä, minkä aavistin jo tänne tullessani! —

huudahti Dmitri Fjodorovitš paheksuen ja hypähti myös paikaltaan.
— Suokaa anteeksi, arvoisa isä, — hän kääntyi luostarinvanhimman
puoleen, — minä olen sivistymätön mies enkä edes tiedä, miten teitä
on nimitettävä, mutta teidät on petetty ja te olitte liian hyvä, kun
sallitte meidän kokoontua luoksenne. Isäukko tahtoo vain
skandaalia, mitä varten — sen hän tietänee itse. Hänellä on aina
omat laskelmansa. Mutta luulenpa nyt tietävänikin, mitä hän tahtoo…

— Kaikki minua syyttävät, kaikki nuo! — huusi vuorostaan Fjodor

Pavlovitš. — Myös Pjotr Aleksandrovitš syyttää. Syytitte, Pjotr
Aleksandrovitš, syytitte! — kääntyi hän äkkiä Miusovin puoleen,
vaikka tällä ei ollut aikomustakaan keskeyttää hänen puhettaan. —
Syyttävät minua siitä, että olen muka piilottanut lasten rahat
saappaanvarteen ja ottanut ruplan ruplalta. Mutta hyväinen aika,
eikö ole olemassa tuomioistuinta? Siellä lasketaan teille, Dmitri
Fjodorovitš, teidän omien kuittienne, kirjeittenne ja sopimustenne
mukaan, kuinka paljon teillä on ollut, kuinka paljon olette kuluttanut
ja paljonko teillä on jäljellä! Miksi Pjotr Aleksandrovitš ei tahdo
lausua tuomiota? Hän tuntee Dmitri Fjodorovitšin. Sen tähden, että
kaikki tahtovat käydä kimppuuni, mutta Dmitri Fjodorovitš on
lopputilissä minulle velkaa, eikä niin vähänkään, vaan useita
tuhansia, mihin minulla on kaikki paperit! Koko kaupunkihan tärisee
ja kaikuu hänen ryyppyretkistään! Mutta siellä, missä hän
aikaisemmin palveli, siellä hän sai maksaa tuhat ruplaa ja
kaksituhatta kunniallisten neitojen viettelemisestä. Sen me
tiedämme, Dmitri Fjodorovitš, kaikkein salaisimpia yksityiskohtia
myöten, ja minä näytän sen toteen… Pyhä isä, uskotteko: hän sai
itseensä rakastumaan jalosukuisen neidon, hyvästä perheestä ja
varakkaan, jonka isä oli hänen entinen esimiehensä, urhoollinen
eversti, ansioitunut mies, jolla oli kaulassa Annan ritarikunnan tähti
miekkoineen, häpäisi tytön kosimalla häntä, nyt tyttö on täällä, nyt
hän on orpo, tuo hänen morsiamensa, mutta hän käy tämän nähden
erään täkäläisen viettelijättären luona. Vaikka tämä viettelijätär onkin
elänyt niin sanoakseni siviiliavioliitossa erään kunnioitetun miehen
kanssa, niin hän on luonteeltaan itsenäinen, hän on kaikille
valloittamaton linnoitus, aivan samanlainen kuin laillinen vaimo, sillä
hän on hyveellinen, — niin, pyhät isät, hän on hyveellinen! Mutta
Dmitri Fjodorovitš tahtoo avata tämän linnoituksen kultaisella
avaimella, siksi hän nyt rehentelee minulle, tahtoo riistää minulta
rahoja ja onkin jo tuhlannut tuhansia tälle viettelijättärelle. Sitä varten
hän ottaa yhtä mittaa rahoja, muun muassa arvaatteko keneltä!
Sanonko sen vai enkö, Mitja?

— Suu kiinni! — huudahti Dmitri Fjodorovitš. — Odottakaa,

kunnes poistun, mutta älkää uskaltako minun läsnäollessani tahria
jalosukuista tyttöä… Jo sekin, että uskallatte ynähtää hänestä, on
hänen häpäisemistään… Minä kiellän!

Hän läähätti.
 — Mitja! Mitja! — huudahti Fjodor Pavlovitš heikkohermoisen
tavoin ja pusertaen kyyneliä silmistään. — Eikö isän siunaus
merkitse mitään? Entäpä jos kiroan sinut, miten silloin käy?

— Häpeämätön mies ja teeskentelijä! — kiljaisi Dmitri Fjodorovitš

raivoissaan.

— Näin hän puhuu isästään, isästään! Kuinka sitten muitten

kanssa? Hyvät herrat, ajatelkaahan: täällä on köyhä, mutta kelpo
mies, entinen kapteeni, hänelle kävi huonosti ja hänet erotettiin
virasta, mutta ei julkisesti, ei oikeudenkäynnin kautta, vaan hänen
kunniansa säilyi tahrattomana. Hänellä on suuri perhe niskoillaan.
Kolme viikkoa sitten meidän Dmitri Fjodorovitš kapakassa tarttui
hänen partaansa, veti hänet parrasta kadulle ja pieksi häntä kadulla
kaiken kansan nähden, ja tämän kaiken hän teki sen tähden, että
mies on minun salainen asiamieheni eräässä asiassani.

— Se on kaikki valhetta! Pinnalta totta, sisältä valhetta! — huusi

Dmitri Fjodorovitš vihasta vavisten. — Isä, minä en puolusta tekojani.
Niin, kaiken kansan nähden tunnustan sen: minä käyttäydyin
petomaisesti tuota kapteenia kohtaan ja olen nyt pahoillani ja inhoan
itseäni petomaisen vihani takia, mutta tuo teidän kapteeninne, teidän
asiamiehenne, meni tuon saman rouvan luo, jota te sanotte
viettelijättäreksi, ja alkoi ehdotella hänelle teidän puolestanne, että
hän ottaisi teidän hallussanne olevat vekselini ja antaisi minulle
haasteen saadakseen minut näitten vekselien perusteella
vankeuteen, jos minä liiaksi ahdistan teitä koettaessanne anastaa
omaisuuden. Nyt te moititte minua siitä, että olen mieltynyt tähän
rouvaan, vaikka te itse opetitte häntä viekottelemaan minua!
Kertoohan hän itse sen päin naamaa. Hän kertoi sen minulle pilkaten
teitä! Vankeuteen taas te tahdotte toimittaa minut ainoastaan sen