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How To Know When A Relationship Is Over - MBG
How To Know When A Relationship Is Over - MBG
If your relationship hasn't been feeling the same lately, you might be wondering
if it's time to call it quits. But no relationship comes without challenges, so how
do you know when it's really over?
When a relationship has run its course, it can be difficult for partners to find the
common ground and sense of connection that was once there. As such, fights
may become more frequent, and more heated, as they're likely a symptom of
underlying issues.
On the other hand, not fighting at all isn't a great sign either, as it's an
indication of apathy and carelessness. As Bruneau explains to mbg, "when one
or both parties don't want to work on things anymore," that's a huge sign the
relationship is on the way out.
Relationships ought to feel fulfilling, supportive, and at the very least, enjoyable!
According to Spinelli, a relationship that's likely ending will be one in which one
or both partners feel the need to take a break or get away from each other on a
regular basis.
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5. You daydream about being single.
Along with wanting a break, you may fantasize about being single if your
relationship isn't what you want it to be. While it's normal to miss some of the
benefits of being single from time to time, if you're constantly daydreaming
about a life without your partner, that's a sign the relationship is not fulfilling to
you.
It's natural for couples to go through ups and downs in their sex life. But if your
intimacy has significantly waned, and "you aren't looking to work on it, or
communicate about what may be taking place in life or the relationship that
could be impacting intimacy," Spinelli says, you're no longer prioritizing the
physical connection that was presumably once there. That signals that you're no
longer looking to each other for pleasure and intimacy.
Healthy relationships are not only supportive but involve compromise and going
out of your way to help one another. So another sign your relationship is on the
fritz is "not wanting to make sacrifices or do things that might be an
inconvenience to support or meet the other partner's needs or wishes," says
Spinelli.
Often if one or both partners want to end things but don't know how, they may
try to sabotage the relationship, Bruneau notes. This can look like "a shift in
behavior, expectations that are no longer being met, and the person constantly
screwing up shows little remorse or desire to rectify or improve things," she
adds.
Think back to when you two were first happily together. You were probably
proud, excited, and eager to bring them around friends and family. As a
relationship begins to crumble, you likely won't want to bring them around
anymore, Bruneau says, preferring to spend that time with the people in your
life, sans partner.
This one can often be the initial downfall of a relationship, as the two of you
realize you may want different things that are nonnegotiable. Maybe one of you
wants kids and the other doesn't, or one of you is religious and the other isn't,
Bruneau says, for example. Some things can be compromised on, but others
simply cannot.
wins.
We're not talking the occasional gripe or snipe at each other. If one or both of
you doesn't respect the other, and you're knowingly treating each other poorly,
Bruneau says, this indicates a lack of compassion for each other and is typically
a symptom of disdain toward the other.
This is an underlying issue related to many of the other signs here, like
constantly fighting, feeling drained and resentful around them, and so on. If
your partner can't even blow their nose without you feeling inexplicably angry,
Bruneau says, something is definitely not right.
And finally, according to Bruneau, having no hope that things can improve
within the relationship is a telltale sign that it's probably over. For two people to
work through their issues, both have to be willing and able to work on it. If one
or both of you feels that's not possible, it simply won't happen.
Relationships go through rough patches and sometimes feel like they’re over,
she says, "but sometimes these are just natural ebbs and flows." No relationship
is perfect, despite how we might romanticize them, and "a lot of people quit at
the first sign of challenge in a relationship," she notes.
If this list of signs resonated with you, but you don't want to give up just yet,
know that it's possible to save a relationship that's falling apart. You and your
partner can try to make it work with open communication, active dedication,
and maybe some professional support.
But if you're fairly certain it's over, remember that while it may be difficult,
sometimes going your separate ways is the best option for the both of you.
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Sarah Regan
mbg Spirituality & Relationships Editor
Sarah Regan is a Spirituality & Relationships Editor, a registered yoga instructor, and an avid astrologer and
tarot reader. She received her bachelor's in broadcasting and mass communication from State University of
New York at Oswego, and lives in Buffalo, New York.
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