22/10/2023, 10:05 AM

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Domestic Violence Survivor

Turned Saviour
Updated May 31, 2022

 Domestic Violence Survivor Turned Saviour

Domestic violence is once again dominating

national headlines, and with tragic endings.
Recently, we saw the murders of four women in
as many days, all of them with a history of
domestic violence. Over the past few months,
several women have had their lives snuffed out
by men they once called husband and partner.

Earline Parsons, a domestic violence survivor

and certified strategic life and spiritual
empowerment coach, knows the story all too
well. That's why she is dedicating her time,
knowledge and resources to tackling this issue
head-on.

Founder of the Inner Healing Institute, Parsons

offers professional counselling to those in need,
and is currently working on providing a safe
house for victims of abuse to live. It is due to
open in January 2023.

'The Lioness' Pride (the name of the shelter) will

be located on the North-East Coast on a farm.
We will be availing ourselves to women and
children fleeing domestic violence, treating with
the trauma that brought them to this life space
and ensuring that their children are home-
schooled and treat- ed before their reintegration
into mainstream life,' Parsons, a mother of two,
told HER.

'My greatest distress when I went through my

experience was finding a safe place to heal and
the support to get on my feet again. I am creating
just that for the sisters who may find themselves
where I was. A place without judgment, a place
where you could breathe and have the means
and time to heal.

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'We will engage our clients in the community and

offer teaching skills in downstream processing of
fruits and other produce, equipping them with the
necessary life skills for a life well lived. I have a
cadre of amazing sister-girlfriends from around
the world, many former students and most
coaches I have collaborated with on projects
waiting to serve. To my knowledge, there is
nothing like this in our country.'

According to Parsons, one of the biggest

misconceptions about domestic violence is that it
mainly affects women from low-income
households. This, she assures, is far from the
truth as educated, professional and successful
women are often victims, too. 'This is the
greatest fallacy of all time.'

'In 2020, I met someone who just seemed to be

everything I needed. I found myself embroiled in
a relationship. Three months in, things changed.
He started finding every reason to see a fault in
something I said or did. Verbally responding to
him only made him more passive aggressive. The
day he hit me, I was in shock for quite a few
hours. I could not understand what I had done;
all I could see was darkness and despair. I felt
ashamed and afraid to tell anyone, so I isolated
that part of myself until I was really at the end of
myself.'

___

"Once I knew I had to flee, the opportunity came

when he was away from the home. I picked up
my stuff and left. 'He contacted me after that and
I answered the call. It was more of the same
accusations of being at fault for his behaviour.
That just reinforced to me that I had done the
right thing for me. I hung up and kept moving
forward.'

Parsons says while men are often the

perpetrators, they also play an important role in
domestic violence discussions, noting that to
successfully deal with the issue takes all hands
on deck.

'They need to be at the forefront of the

conversation, 'wounded people wound people'.
'The perpetrator is as much a victim as the sister
he is abusing.'

So what can we do to help a friend or family

member we suspect may be experiencing
domestic violence, but may be too afraid to seek
help?

'Treat them with compassion and respect. Do not

judge them, do not reinforce their feelings of
failure and helplessness with the words that you
speak to them,' Parsons advises. 'Don't be Job's
friends. Help them to feel safe with you and take
the necessary steps that you can to get them
help.'

Minister of Gender and Child Affairs Ayanna

Webster-Roy told HER that the State currently
has two shelters for women and their children.

'We are also working towards establishing a

shelter for male victims and children, hopefully, to
be operationalised before the end of the fiscal
year," she told HER.

Minster Webster-Roy added that the domestic

violence hotline, 800-SAVE /800-7283, remains
operational on a 24-hours basis.

'Persons who may be affected can contact the

hotline for guidance or support. The staff at the
hotline will be able to provide guidance for
shelters, etc,' Webster-Roy said, adding, 'If
someone is in imminent danger, the TTPS should
be contacted at 999. If a child is being abused or
abuse is suspected, we encourage persons to
contact the Children's Authority on 800-2014 or
996.'

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Tags Ayanna Webster-roy Criminal Law

Domestic Violence Earline Parsons Hotline

Survivor End Domestic Violence

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