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The Palgrave Handbook of Imposter Syndrome in Higher Education Michelle Addison Full Chapter
The Palgrave Handbook of Imposter Syndrome in Higher Education Michelle Addison Full Chapter
The Palgrave Handbook of Imposter Syndrome in Higher Education Michelle Addison Full Chapter
The Palgrave
Handbook of Imposter
Syndrome in Higher
Education
Editors
Michelle Addison Maddie Breeze
Department of Sociology Sociology and Public Sociology
Durham University Queen Margaret University
Durham, UK Edinburgh, UK
Yvette Taylor
School of Education
University of Strathclyde
Glasgow, UK
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Foreword
v
vi Foreword
I ponder on what imposterism looks and feels like. What if the character
on the poster is a hybrid of something alien and human, something ugly,
something monstrous even? I have a sense of self-loathing around ‘being’ an
imposter and I’ve aimed to capture this in the character I created. There are
times when I try to blend or fit in, but deep down I feel very much out
of place. A lizard person seemed fitting—as dangerous, disguised, below the
surface but also as hybrid, resistant and able to bite back.
When it came to giving a talk for the Newcastle event, I created and
recorded a ‘video letter’ communicating what ‘imposter syndrome’ feels like
to me: the lizard person becomes mobile, multiple and mirrored in recogni-
tions near and far. My aim was to inspire and open up conversations about
what imposterism meant to each person at the event. It’s a funny thing to
address an invisible audience, in another country, via a pre-recorded video:
I didn’t know who would be at the event so I approached it more like
composing a letter, casually sent like a video note from my phone whilst
waiting for dinner at a cafe in Tokyo—in a tone of—‘to whoever finds this
interesting’! At the time of the recording I was in Japan, and had been invited
to be a designer-in-residence to represent India, participating in a programme
called Door to Asia. Partly funded by the Japan Foundation, Door to Asia is a
think tank and a network of Asian designers working together to help disaster
affected businesses in Japan and other Asian countries. Door to Asia started
their work with Sake, Fish processing and community-based businesses in
Tohoku which was the region most affected by the tsunami caused by the
great East Japan earthquake in 2011.
In my video letter I spoke about how, on this particular work trip in Tokyo,
I felt that everyone was much more talented and experienced than me—I felt
that I had no right to enter through the door! The head of Japan Founda-
tion and the creative director of Uniqlo listened to participants’ Door to Asia
presentations. I had no idea why they would be interested in my work. The
other designers’ work seemed very slick. As days passed by, slowly I could see
why I was there and what I had to offer. My fears were calmed by the end
of the trip, but were nonetheless debilitating. In the video letter I described
some of the tools that helped me calm my anxiety, like imagining the worst
possible outcome and accepting it, and then imagining the best outcome and
hoping for it. I also imagined and reminded myself that everyone around
me also has their own set of fears and insecurities about their work, and this
helped me approach the situation as an equal, not seeing myself as lesser than
everyone else but rather a lizard person with tough skin. The familiar feeling
I have—that everyone else looks so sophisticated, intelligent, and as if they
have everything together (and I am the only one who feels out of place) still
Foreword vii
surfaces from time to time. In my video letter I also spoke about how, with
my lizard person design, I hoped to create a poster that would make people
stop and pause for a second look, whilst invoking curiosity to come to the
event. My inspiration for the colours and the typography were inspired by
the vibrant window displays in Glasgow and Edinburgh earlier that year. I
was visiting Scotland on Churnjeet Mahn’s kind invitation with my sister
Ratika Singh after our participation in the Creative Interruptions festival at
the British Film Institute, London in June 2019. There, we showcased the
work created for the artist residency programme at Preet Nagar Residency, the
artists’ and writers’ residency that we run in Punjab, India. This was set up as
an intended community by my great grandfather Gurbaksh Singh Preetlari
in 1933.
At Imposter Syndrome as Public Feeling in Education many participants
mentioned how they identified with my Lizard Person. In this Handbook
you will see various lizard people emerge. Do you see yourself in any of these
images? When I was creating them, I wanted to show that some of the lizard
people feel inferior, and out of place. Some lizards are ready to ‘dive in’ and
be part of the action but are not allowed when, for example, space is marked
out as a ‘men-only’. We see another lizard person feeling very small. Why do
we feel like imposters? I have felt as if I was in the wrong place at many times
in my life. I felt I wasn’t good enough for it. I made sense of feeling like an
imposter in my mind as ‘this must be a unique problem with me’ . I was not
aware that imposterism could be a symptom of structural inequalities. But let
me tell you more of my story. I went to a private boarding school—Lawrence
School Sanawar—that my parents could not afford. It was a prestigious insti-
tution founded in 1857, with beautiful 150-year-old stone buildings and
wooden floors and big windows looking out onto the Himalayas. It was there
that I decided I wasn’t great at Math, Physics or Chemistry. I now wonder
if segregating us at the age of 14 marked us for life—A grade for the brainy
kids, B for almost-brainy-but-need-to-work-hard, C for will-pass and D for
hopeless. Experiments of some adults ruin the self-image of people!
As I write this, I must confess academic writing makes me so afraid—there
are endless grants I must apply to as an artist, yet I struggle with writing
anything at all.
Being a young girl from a family still reeling from the trauma of the
Partition of India & Pakistan, the poverty and the violent memories that
my grandmother and my parents’ generation have experienced have led to
numerous ancestral demons of alcoholism, patriarchy, violence and much
more. It’s hard to be a fighter. My mum raised us to be fighters, and that stays
with me and guides me now into my mid-30s. Through most of my teens and
viii Foreword
all hold a light and a colour of sorts. There are invisible undercurrents and
shadows always ready to submerge us in self-doubt.
My grandmother, who I loved very much, was a lawyer—born in Nairobi,
Kenya, she was one of the first Indian women to study at Cardiff University,
UK. She then received her bar-at-law from Lincoln’s Inn in London whilst
helping Mbiyu Koinange prepare notes from newspaper clippings for his
speeches. Koinange was building up for Kenya’s independence and struggle
against apartheid, and was eventually part of the cabinet for Jomo Keny-
atta, Kenya’s first president. My grandmother was the only one among her
siblings who moved back to India. She traced her roots and worked all her
life for women empowerment doing free legal work for women who couldn’t
afford lawyers. My grandmother told me ‘never stop your music’ and gave me
endless encouragement for my art too. It is these moments, that barely lasted
a minute, that are a strong source of light and courage to banish any shadows
that imposterism might throw at me. As long as I am alert when imposterism
is sneaking up.
Illustration helps me communicate invisible feelings and I’m delighted
to be part of this Handbook of Imposterism in Higher Education. I have
thoroughly enjoyed engaging with research in this way, learning from it and
depicting feelings through illustration. Working on this Handbook I have
learned that imposterism is a feeling we are all better off not being subjected
to too often. That said, I believe that this Handbook gives us an array of tools
to analyse imposterism, the impact it has on us, and the spaces we inhabit
in and out of formal education. After reading this Handbook, I hope the
reader feels able to reflect on imposterism as a public feeling that powerful
institutions and their systems are accountable for (re)producing.
Samia Singh is an illustrator and a graphic designer based in Punjab, India. Her
work includes visualising Imposter Syndrome and the illustrated book Feminism
in Our Times: Crises, Connections & Cares, as well as festival design for the
Preet Nagar Mela, celebrating marginalised arts and crafts. Samia studied Visual
Communication at Srishti Institute of Art, Design & Technology, Bangalore, India
(2009) as well as Printmaking at Il Bisonte Instituto de Arte Grafica in Firenze,
Italy (2012). Her work has been exhibited in India, Singapore, Spain, Japan,
UK and Italy and clients include UNFPA, The Economist, Huffington Post and
National Geographic. Website: www.samiasingh.com Instagram: samiasingh_art;
Twitter: @samiasingh_art.
Contents
xi
xii Contents
Index 631
Notes on Contributors
xvii
xviii Notes on Contributors
postvention and prevention. She has also written about the impact of sensitive
research on our personal and professional development.
Dr. Francesca Sobande is a Lecturer in Digital Media Studies, at the School
of Journalism, Media and Culture, Cardiff University, UK.
Francesca’s research focuses on digital remix culture, popular culture and
Black women’s media experiences. She is the author of The Digital Lives of
Black Women in Britain (Palgrave Macmillan, 2020).
Dr. Nathan Stephens Griffin is a Senior Lecturer, at Northumbria Univer-
sity, UK.
Nathan’s academic research is predominantly situated within the fields of
green criminology and critical animal studies, and he is particularly interested
in social and environmental justice, political activism, and state repression of
ecological and animal liberation struggle.
Paula Stone is a Senior Lecturer in the Faculty of Arts, Humanities and
Education at Canterbury Christ Church University.
Drawing on critical theory and feminist approaches, Paula’s research inter-
ests lie in narrative and auto/biographical research methods and the study of
interrelationship between education and social inequality.
Yvette Taylor is a Professor at the University of Strathclyde, UK, teaching
on the M.Sc. in Applied Gender Studies. She is a feminist sociologist and
researches intersecting social inequalities, including manifestations of gender,
social class and sexuality. Her books include Fitting Into Place? Class and
Gender Geographies and Temporalities (2012).
Kathryn Telling is a Lecturer in Sociology at the University of Sussex, UK.
Her research interests are in the sociology of higher education and knowl-
edge, with a particular focus on the humanities, social class and the graduate
labour market.
Dr. Virginie Thériault is a Professor at the Université du Québec à Montréal,
Canada.
Virginie’s current research interests include: adult education, bureaucratic
literacies, literate environments, and informal and non-formal education in
rural communities. She also has a particular interest in understanding the
connections between the Francophone and Anglophone traditions of literacy
research.
Faith Tissa is a 4th year Ph.D. Candidate at the University of Central
Lancashire, UK.
Notes on Contributors xxvii
xxix
List of Tables
xxxi
1
Situating Imposter Syndrome in Higher
Education
Maddie Breeze, Michelle Addison, and Yvette Taylor
Introduction
This Handbook is about people and how we can find and feel ourselves posi-
tioned in and out of place in educational institutions. In entering higher
education (HE) students and staff might experience a sense of comfort and
familiarity, an insider status, and a sense of smoothly, easily fitting-in. In
contrast, a feeling of unease can alert us that we are in unfamiliar waters,
uncertain and unknowing. Experiences of being inside and/or outside might
be constant companions, lingering, following and haunting us. Experiences
can also be felt more fleetingly as momentary realisations or brief awareness,
just as feeling like an imposter can conflict and overlap with different registers
of (not) belonging. The work gathered in this Handbook explores educa-
tional presences and absences through the prism of ‘imposter syndrome’ to
M. Breeze (B)
Sociology and Public Sociology, Queen Margaret University, Edinburgh, UK
M. Addison
Department of Sociology, Durham University, Durham, UK
e-mail: michelle.addison@durham.ac.uk
Y. Taylor
University of Strathclyde, Glasgow, UK
e-mail: yvette.taylor@strath.ac.uk
the legacies of and current debates in feminist theories about the insides
and outsides of HE, especially those ways of knowing grounded in Black,
working-class and queer women’s experiences (Addison 2012; Collins 1986;
Gabriel and Tate 2017; Gutiérrez y Muhs et al. 2012; Mahony and Zmroczek
1997; Taylor 2013; Tokarczyk and Fay 1993). This Handbook sets out
to contribute to redressing this disconnect. However, we have bumped up
against the problem of how talking, writing and researching about imposter
syndrome can unintentionally reiterate some of the concept’s limitations.
Situating accounts of imposter syndrome in social and political context brings
with it the risk of repeating tendencies to frame feeling like an imposter as an
individual problem.
With this in mind, the Handbook explores and reflects on a landscape
in which we question whether imposterism has turned in on itself, become
hollowed out and emptied of meaning. Are we left with a ubiquitous cate-
gory that can be used by everybody without telling us anything about the
specificity of academic belonging and inequalities? Should imposterism be
consigned to ‘theoretical landfill’? What happens when the idea of imposter
syndrome, and felt sensations of (un)belonging are put into conversation with
social-scientific theories of educational inclusions and inequalities?
the imposter(s) stand in their corners—in rigidly defined angles of class, race
and gender—or is there possibility in generalisability? Is there a possibility
of the imposter, in the present, or does their proliferating presences disap-
pear ‘past’ efforts and debates, while they break through academic walls? This
Handbook asks, if we are all now imposters, of some degree at least, does this
occlude the insidiousness of specific powers and privileges?
Although ‘imposter syndrome’ is not a new term per se—and not a new
feeling—it has recently caught the public imagination again as it comes to
stand-in as a proxy for hierarchy, inequality and unfairness (Olah 2019).
The ‘newness’ of attention to imposter syndrome can gloss over much longer
histories of educational exclusions and partial, conditional, tokenistic inclu-
sions. Moreover, feeling like an imposter—according to a myriad of academic
blog posts, think pieces, and newspaper articles on imposter syndrome—is
an omnipresent feature of the emotional life of universities, for students and
staff alike. Making appeals to figures such as Einstein and Angelou (Buck-
land 2017) and ‘the most respected academics in the world’ (McMillan 2016)
these authors reproduce and repackage the most widely used definition of
imposter syndrome, which hinges on feeling as if one isn’t good enough
and one doesn’t belong despite evidence to the contrary. Imposter syndrome
is often defined as a ‘failure of rationality’ (Slank 2019), and as an ‘illu-
sion of personal incompetence’ (Chrisman et al. 1995, 495 italics added) as
felt ‘despite outstanding academic and professional accomplishments’ (Clance
and Imes 1978, 1 italics added). Here we see how both popular and
academic understandings of feeling like an imposter can be definitionally
detached from social context. For us, as editors, producing a Handbook on
‘imposter syndrome’ we invoke the term guardedly, with caution. We’ve been
impressed, and in some senses frustrated, by the number of responses to our
call for chapters. Clearly, ‘imposter syndrome’ has purchase when seeking to
name and know ‘our’ feelings and experiences in and out of higher education,
and this Handbook evidences the necessity of pausing on this purchase and
asking what might be elided in the rush to tell imposter stories.
2019; Rollock 2019; Bhopal 2016; Mirza and Arday 2018). It is necessary
to laboriously repeat this evidence, but the evidence itself may not be suffi-
cient to effect feminist institutional change (Breeze and Taylor 2020). Given
the extent of the research evidence on HE inequality regimes, it is unsur-
prising that academics marked as ‘other’, as ‘embodying diversity’ (Ahmed
2009) or ‘deficiency’ (Loveday 2016; Taylor 2013) might not only feel like,
but be treated as, imposters in the academy. While many of those who ‘fit’
educational institutions may never have their academic presences directly
questioned or challenged, for others this can be a regular occurrence. Johnson
and Joseph-Salisbury (2018) show how racist microaggressions, including
being asked directly ‘are you supposed to be here?’ perpetuate racism in the
academy against those racialised as ‘out of place’ (Mirza 2018). For those
marked as other in HE inequality regimes, feeling like an imposter may
involve less of a fear of being discovered, or a failure of rationality, but rather
may be an accurate interpretation of one’s position in relation to discrimi-
natory structures, ‘a case of already having been found out’ (Lumsden 2019,
116).
from HE’s inequality regimes and we move towards a socially and politi-
cally grounded understanding of imposter feelings. The ‘golden thread’ across
this Handbook explores how becoming academic is continually re-constituted
as well as contested (Addison 2016), re-emerging in contemporary contexts
of neoliberalism (Taylor and Lahad 2018) and entrepreneurialism (Taylor
2014).
The chapters provide new interdisciplinary analyses of ‘imposter
syndrome’, exploring sensations of not belonging, fraudulence and feeling
out of place. In contemporary higher educational times, negotiating such
a ‘syndrome’ might mean ‘working on the self ’ in a climate of competi-
tiveness, and endless metric measures (Addison 2016, 2012; Addison and
Mountford 2015). Inhabiting the ‘right kind’ of presence in higher educa-
tion is not straightforward and can engender a sensation of imposterism:
this collection asks why this matters and how these senses can be negotiated
and resisted, and located within a broader educational economy beyond the
individual ‘imposter’. In bringing together these international and interdisci-
plinary contributions this collection locates academic ‘imposter syndrome’ in
both a social and political context, and reflects on long histories of working-
class, queer and Black feminist work on the affective dynamics of structural
inequalities in higher education (Taylor 2012, 2014).
The Handbook is structured in three parts around ‘Academic Identities’,
‘Imposing Institutions’ and ‘Putting Imposter Feelings to Work’.
In part one we are interested in how feeling like an imposter might be iden-
tified, inhabited, resisted and re-worked. Our contributors here are centrally
concerned with re-thinking ‘imposterism’ as a social, public, political issue in
higher education, asking who gets to fit in and get ahead and what impact
these practices have on inclusions, exclusions and marginalisation. In locating
academic imposters, authors bring together discussions and analysis of feeling
like an ‘imposter’ through a myriad of intersections in higher education and
academic labour.
At the same time, an awkward question arises around how imposterism is
constructed and contested from different identity positions and social loca-
tions. It is possible to feel as if one doesn’t belong while embodying the ultimate
10 M. Breeze et al.
again about new-old feminist debates about imposterism. But what work can
imposters be tasked up with beyond re-telling a story of the self? Is perma-
nent academic promotion the task of the imposter, moving from absence
to insisting on presence or can the imposter be channelled to think back,
forward, across political, social and embodied positionalities? In reading
this Handbook, we encourage you, the reader, to reflect on the following
questions:
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1 Situating Imposter Syndrome in Higher Education 15
These results did not hold good for all the zooecia in a single colony.
In some, the "brown body" was not completely got rid of at the end of
sixty-eight days, the conclusion of the experiment.
So striking are the facts relating to the "brown bodies" that it has
been believed[510] that what we have above described as the
individual really consists of two kinds of individuals: firstly, the
"polypide" or complex of tentacles and digestive organs; and
secondly, the "zooecium," or house of the zooid or polypide,
corresponding with what has been described above as the body-
wall. The one individual, the zooecium, is on this view provided with
successive generations of the second kind of individual, the
polypide; and these latter function as the digestive organs of the two-
fold organism. This view, though fascinating at first sight, is not borne
out by an examination of all the facts of the case, especially when
the Entoprocta are taken into account.
The base from which the whole set of tentacles springs is known as
the "lophophore."[520] In the Entoprocta (Fig. 236, 1) the lophophore
is circular; the mouth is situated near the margin of the area
surrounded by the tentacles; and the anus is found within the circlet,
near the end opposite to the mouth.
In (2) and (3), representing the Ectoprocta, the anus is outside the
series of tentacles. In the majority of cases, including all the marine
Ectoprocta and one or two of the fresh-water forms, the lophophore
is circular (2), the mouth occurring at the centre of the circle, and not
being provided with a lip. These forms of Ectoprocta constitute the
Order Gymnolaemata,[521] the dominant group of the Polyzoa in
respect of number of genera and species. The remaining Ectoprocta
belong to the exclusively fresh-water Order Phylactolaemata,[522]
in which the mouth is protected by an overhanging lip or "epistome";
the ground-plan of the tentacles is, except in Fredericella, horse-
shoe shaped (Fig. 236, 3), and the tentacles themselves are usually
much more numerous than in the other cases.
Having arrived at this point, the avicularia seem to lose all sense of
the propriety of remaining in the positions once occupied by zooecia.
They have become degraded to the rank of appendages of the
zooecia, and as such they may occur in an astonishing variety of
positions. Sometimes one occurs on each zooecium in the middle
line, or asymmetrically, or even on the top of the ovicell; in other
cases the orifice is flanked by an avicularium on each side (Fig. 239,
B). Sometimes (Cellepora) the avicularia are of more than one kind,
some being large and some small, some having a pointed mandible
and others a mandible with a rounded spoon-like end.
Within the jaws, in the region which we may term the palate, is a
rounded knob, which bears a tuft of delicate sensory hairs, which
doubtless enable the avicularium to recognise the presence of any
foreign body. The closure of the mouth may, indeed, be
instantaneously induced by touching it with the point of a needle. It
has been suggested that a small mass of cells which bears these
hairs may represent the rudiment of the polypide.
It is not, indeed, certain what are the enemies against which the
Polyzoa have specially to guard. Sea-urchins and certain Molluscs
are known to browse on Polyzoa. Fresh-water Polyzoa, in which
avicularia and vibracula are absent, are attacked by the larvae of
Insects, and by Triclad Planarians. I have found the latter with their
long pharynx everted and completely buried in a Cristatella colony. It
is possible that some marine Cheilostomes may be saved from
attacks of this kind owing to the existence of their armoury of
avicularia and vibracula. It is also possible that these structures are
of service by removing foreign particles which might otherwise settle
on the colony, and tend to block up its orifices. It has further been
suggested that animals seized by the avicularia may be held until
they die, and that their disintegrating particles may then be carried to
the mouths of the polypides by the ciliary currents of the tentacles;
but proofs of this suggestion are wanting, and it must be admitted
that the subject needs further elucidation.
The vibracula ordinarily remain stationary for some little time, every
now and then giving a sweep through the water. In the majority of
cases these structures, like the avicularia, act perfectly
independently of one another, so far as can be made out; but in
Caberea (Fig. 242) the vibracula move in unison, the simultaneous
action of the whole series, after a period of quiet, being described as
"positively startling."[536]