THE LIFE PURPOSE INSTITUTE

SPIRITUAL COACHING METHOD™

DEEPENING YOUR SPIRITUALITY

© Fern Gorin and The Life Purpose Institute 1994-2022 (ver 06.22) Deepening Your Spirituality B - 1
 Learning Objectives

In this chapter you will learn:

Key information to find out from any Spiritual Coaching client

How to remember one’s spiritual connection throughout the day

How to help your client develop a spiritual practice

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 DEFINITIONS OF SPIRITUALITY
Spirituality is your belief in something bigger than yourself.

Spirituality is a way of having peace and a purpose in life

Spirituality is the quality of being concerned with the human spirit or soul as opposed to
physical or material things.

Spirituality can be a source of meaning, health, and happiness.

Seeking personal growth, religious experience, belief in a supernatural realm or afterlife, or

making sense of one's own "inner dimension."

Sensitivity or attachment to religious values

The quality or state of being spiritual

© Fern Gorin and The Life Purpose Institute 1994-2022 (ver 06.22) Deepening Your Spirituality B - 3
 THE WAYS SPIRITUALITY IMPROVES YOUR LIFE
1. Give your life purpose and meaning.

2. Feel more gratitude.

3. Better cope with stress.

4. Improve social connections; develop and grow more positive relationships.

5. Become more resilient.

6. Experience more compassion.

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 IMPORTANT QUESTIONS TO ASK CLIENTS
These questions are designed for you to understand how to best relate to your
client and understand their specific beliefs, viewpoints, and the way they
communicate about their spirituality.

1. What does spirituality mean to you?

2. To what religion or spiritual path do you currently ascribe? What’s important to

you about your religion or spiritual path? Are there certain beliefs or practices?

3. What word do you identify with the most? Is it God, Christ, Buddha, Spirit,

universe, higher power, etc.

4. What does soul mean to you?

5. What does intuition mean to you?

6. What does prayer/meditation mean to you?

7. How does spirituality help you in your everyday life?

8. What does it mean for you to be spiritually connected?

9. What can you do to feel more spiritually connected?

10. How have you applied your spirituality to your life in the past?

11. How can you apply spirituality to your life now?

12. What does it mean to you to bring a spiritual perspective into your life? How

would you approach your life differently?

© Fern Gorin and The Life Purpose Institute 1994-2022 (ver 06.22) Deepening Your Spirituality B - 5
 SPIRITUAL BIOGRAPHY
Doing a Spiritual Biography can bring awareness to someone’s spiritual journey. It

changes their perspectives on both joyful, positive, as well as unpleasant, negative

experiences, and brings new awareness to help them grow.

This exercise can be done with an individual coaching client or with partners in a

group.

Doing a Spiritual Biography

Write a spiritual biography from the time you were born until now. Include all the

important moments, including religious experiences, significant spiritual moments,

and turning points that brought you to where you are today.

Next, draw a timeline from birth to the present moment on a large sheet of paper.

Mark all of the important moments you listed on the timeline. Spend time

contemplating the timeline to see what you discover. Share what you learned in the

coaching session or group.

STRENGTHENING YOUR SPIRITUAL CONNECTION AND SOUL

What is your symbol for your Spiritual Connection?

Facilitate the Process: Strengthening Exercise

Take a few slow, deep, cleansing breaths. See white light going from head to toe,

cleansing you, clearing you, releasing any tension or distraction. Allow yourself to

become completely relaxed and fully present in this moment.

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For right now, let go of what happened earlier today or yesterday. Let go of the

cares and concerns of your life, and let yourself come into the present moment.

Continue taking some nice slow, deep breaths, allowing yourself to become more

and more relaxed.

We’re going on a journey to strengthen your spiritual connection and feel the

presence of God (use their name) more deeply.

See yourself someplace that you have been or wish to be that is so peaceful, so

comfortable, so relaxing. Maybe it’s an ocean, a mountain, a stream. Allow yourself

to enjoy the wonderful sights, the wonderful sounds, the wonderful feelings of this

place. You’re noticing you feel completely relaxed and content. Ah, it feels so good.

Some people really feel God; really feel their spiritual connection when they’re in

nature. Right now, we’re going to explore your spiritual connection, one that can be

there 100% of the time. When you feel God, Christ, Spirit, your higher self (use their

name), where do you feel that? Is it all around you, is it in you, is it surrounding one

part of your body or your whole body?

Does it have a shape?

Does it have a color?

Does it have an image or picture? Do you imagine it as a person, a symbol, a color?

Some people see it as a color like white, gold, or purple. Some people have a symbol

like a cross, a picture of Christ, a Jewish star, or another spiritual symbol.

Allow this spiritual connection to speak to you. Open yourself up and notice what it is

saying? What else is it saying?

Be open to whatever you’re receiving. You’re in a safe place, and you really need this

spiritual connection, just as we need air to breathe.

Tell this feeling, symbol, or voice that is your spiritual connection that you want to

expand it, feel it every day, and feel and experience it 100% of the time in your day-

to-day life.

Ask how you might expand or experience this connection even more. Do you feel,

see, sense, or hear anything else?

 Now, it’s time to connect with your soul. Your unique essence, who you came here to

be this lifetime. As you picture your soul, what are you seeing? What are you feeling?

What are you hearing?

As you ask God (substitute name) about your soul, what does God want to tell you?

What are the qualities of your soul?

Anything else you need to know about your soul?

Know that your spiritual connection and soul are with you 100% of the time.

You can keep this peace, this sense of well-being with you 100% of the time.

In a moment, you’re going to gently come back to the room, keeping these images,

feelings, and words with you.

You’re going to come back to the room, feeling your feet on the floor, your back

against the chair, feeling refreshed, alert, and oh so peaceful and content. Take your

time coming back. You now feel so wonderful. In a few moments, I’m going to ask

you to come back to the room and draw and write about your spiritual connection

and soul.

Optional, if you’re working in person with a client or group: Have the client draw
or write about their spiritual connection and soul. Hand them paper and crayons or

markers. Have the client draw and write on a piece of paper from an art pad, or

regular paper, the words or images that are representative of their spiritual

connection or soul. Debrief the exercise.

How can you remember your spiritual connection?

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HELPING PEOPLE REMEMBER THEIR SPIRITUAL CONNECTION
Something in the exercise just covered may be an anchor for your client to come

back to and help them tap into their spiritual connection. Perhaps your client

discovered an image, a word, or a feeling. This is powerful for them and helps them

remember that connection.

People get spiritually connected in a variety of other ways. These include:

Praying

Meditating or doing centering exercises

Doing readings from their spiritual or religious texts (the Bible, the Vedas,

meditation guides, etc. …)

Having a meaningful picture or quote in a visible place

Playing spiritual music

Practicing yoga

Attending a church or spiritual group

Going to a workshop or group centered on spirituality. These can be at church,

spiritual centers, meet-up groups, etc.

Being in nature

Ask your client how they can embrace and tap into their spirituality in the future.

Many of us have spiritual experiences. The key is learning how to be present and stay

in that place of spiritual connection from moment to moment. Ask your client:

How will you remember that spiritual connection?

What will be your anchor?

What pulls you to get spiritually connected right now and throughout your day?
 Bringing a spiritual perspective into life situations can be very powerful for your

clients. To bring that spiritual perspective you might say, “How can you view this
(the situation) from a spiritual perspective?”

A more advanced question might be, “How can you view this more holistically,
that is through a mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual lens?” Your client will
discover how they can look at their spirituality differently.

Perhaps they will discover the experience they are having or the situation they are

dealing with as a path of learning, a test of faith, or an opening for new people and

opportunities to come into their life. They may be learning new things about others or

themselves. It could be the starting point for them to break old habits and patterns,

or as a sign to move forward in a different way.

Keep asking your client about how they could view the situation from a spiritual

perspective. The client will get different viewpoints each time you ask about

approaching things spiritually.

EVERYDAY TASKS AS MEDITATION

by Wolf Laguerra of Soul Intentions
One of the top excuses given by our life coaching clients is, “I don’t have enough

time.” We often find them in a state of overwhelm when meditation is suggested as

an addition to their to-do list. This daunting feeling of doing more turns to frustration

when they can’t still their mind or when they feel hurried while trying to fit it in. A

sense of failure can arise, and coaching tools begin to seem more foe than friend.

A simple tool to avoid this client pitfall is utilizing everyday tasks as meditation.

Start by asking your client some of the following questions to determine which

activities on their to-do list might present as a good start for this mindfulness

practice:

What do you enjoy doing? (examples: walking, listening to music)

What is a task you need to do every day? (examples: washing dishes,
folding laundry)
When do you find moments of alone time? (examples: taking a shower,
driving to work)

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Once a task is chosen, set a trial time period for the client to begin introducing

meditation into the activity. One week is ideal for the client to get a sense of what

stands out most for them when they stay present. This is important because you don’t

want to frame the experience for the client. It works best when their experience is

built into a practice of their own making.

Suggest that the client pause and take three deep breaths before beginning the

task. This sends a signal to their brain and nervous system that they are shifting gears,

and it will help them become fully present. Then, instruct them to pay attention to

their breath, along with anything that stimulates the five senses as they complete the

task.

Set a time to check in once the trial is over to discuss what the client experienced.

Client observations will lead you to the best coaching suggestions to take their

meditation deeper.

Here is one example using the task of dishwashing:

Client Observations: the sounds of the water, the scent of the dish detergent, the
clink of the dishes, the repetition of moving dishes from sink to dishwasher, the

feeling of their hands on the dishes.

Coaching Suggestions: focus on the sound of the water to take you deeper, notice
the scent of the detergent with every breath, fall into a rhythm while moving from sink

to dishwasher, notice your breath syncing up with your hand movements.

Other common tasks and how to use them to create a meditative state:
Vacuuming – breathing in and out with the back-and-forth movement of the

vacuum.

Walking – syncing the breath to their footsteps, wearing headphones so the

breath can be better heard, listening to meditation during the walk, focusing on

surroundings or gratitudes while walking.

Showering – picturing the water cleansing away whatever isn’t for the best and

highest good, feeling the warmth of the water as safety or relaxation.

 Coaching Tips:
Anything that creates noise or movement can be used to take the client into a

deeper state of meditation and provide anchors for their focus.

Deliberate breathing clears the mind to be open to receiving messages, balance,

peace, or relaxation. Different clients will find different benefits in their

experiences, and all benefits should be supported as right and successful.

Drinking water after the task is always recommended to assist the client with

grounding their experience and flushing away what does not serve them.

Meditation does not have to be a special time of sitting in an “om” state while

adding to our clients’ already busy lives. It can be successfully added to established

tasks to give the client a sense of well-being in everyday life.

MINDFULNESS: PRESENT MOMENT AWARENESS

What exactly is mindfulness? As human beings, our tendency is to ruminate about the

past or worry about the future. Mindfulness is being present in the moment, paying

attention to what you’re doing right now. To be fully conscious and tune into deeper

realms, we need to be able to bring ourselves back to the present any time we

remember to.

On one level, mindfulness is about focusing on what you’re doing in the moment. As

you’re washing the dishes, you pay attention to every spot on the dish as you clean it.

As you’re mowing the lawn, you feel the sun on your face, smell the newly mown grass

and appreciate the beauty and fragrance of the flowers.

This may sound boring, but if you’re fully present, your senses will become sharper

and you’ll notice things that you completely overlooked before and bring a deeper

joy into your daily life.

A classic mindfulness exercise that you can take your client through is to experience

an ordinary raisin. You can substitute a bite of fruit or some kind of nut if you like.

Hold the raisin and see how it feels in your fingers.

Give them time to experience each step.

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Look at it closely and see what you observe about it. Notice the colors, the dark and

light parts. Smell it. Then bring it to your lips. How does that feel?

Allow the client to comment.

Now, put it in your mouth and explore it with your tongue. Bite into it. Notice the taste

and how the texture changes. When you’re ready, swallow it and see if you can feel it

going down.

What was that experience like for you?

Another aspect of mindfulness is staying conscious as you go through your day. Most

of us rush through our day without thinking about it. Have you ever driven somewhere

and have absolutely no memory of the drive?

This is not unusual. We get lost in our thoughts and lose awareness of what’s going on

around us. With mindfulness practice, we stay connected in every moment (as much

as possible), so our life doesn’t become a blur of activity.

Finally, mindfulness is about accepting yourself, your thoughts and feelings, and your

current situations just as they are, without judgment or trying to change anything.

When you’re aware, you can catch those automatic thoughts of self-doubt and self-

criticism and consciously choose to treat yourself with kindness and compassion.

When you’re coming from a place of calm acceptance, you can be more creative in

solving life’s challenges.

Typical practices for mindfulness include various forms of meditation, conscious

breathing or even creating a silent retreat for an hour, a day or a week. You can

practice mindfulness from moment to moment, so it doesn’t require extra time in your

busy schedule.

So, what is the value of mindfulness? By cultivating mindfulness, you’ll be more

present in your job, in your relationships and with your kids. You’ll become kinder to

yourself and others, and seemingly ordinary moments in life will come alive. When

you’re more connected to your life, you can more effectively reach for those deeper

connections.
 HELPING YOUR CLIENT DEVELOP A SPIRITUAL PRACTICE
Spiritual Coaches often help their clients explore and commit to some sort of regular

spiritual practice. A spiritual practice can be something someone does on a daily, or

weekly basis. Often by doing a spiritual practice, praying, or meditating people

experience a sense of oneness, peace, and feeling connected to something greater

than themselves.

You might want to help someone develop their spiritual practice if the client:
Feels disconnected from their spirituality in their day-to-day life

Wants to connect with their spirituality more

Had a practice previously and want to start doing their practice again.

Below is a script you might use around a spiritual practice:

What does feeling more spiritually connected mean for you? What would being

spiritually connected look like for you?

How could you feel more spiritually connected on a day-to-day basis? What other

ideas come to mind?

Any other ideas?

Some people develop a regular spiritual practices such as daily prayer, meditation,

participating in church or spiritual group, or walking in nature. What could you do as

a regular spiritual practice for yourself?

How could you further (explore, learn about, implement deepen) this practice?

What could you do this week to ____ (explore, learn about, implement, deepen) this

practice?

Note: the client could research what other people do for their spiritual practice.

An important topic at some point is to discuss how the client might grow spiritually.

Is it by experiencing a spiritual teacher, finding a spiritual community, doing spiritual

reading, learning more about and practicing different forms of meditation, etc.

Remember that spiritual awareness and a spiritual connection needs to be tapped

into consistently and developed over time.

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 What is your spiritual practice?

LETTER TO GOD
This exercise is a powerful way to create an ongoing dialogue with your higher
source. (God, The Divine, The Universe, Higher Power. Use whatever your word for
God is.)

To access a higher level of your own awareness, write your own letter to God.

For example, you may wish to address this letter “Dear God” or “Dear Universe” or

"Dear Wisdom."

In your letter, write about situations in your life that are difficult and challenging.

Share from the heart what you are worried about and the feelings that you have.

Ask for guidance by asking any questions that you have.

A good question to ask could be:

What is the best choice I can make in this situation for myself and all involved?

End your letter with the following sentence: “Dear God, please write through my pen.

Thank you very much.” Then, proceed to write a letter back to yourself from God.

Address it to yourself from God and allow God's message to flow to you through your

pen.

An ongoing dialogue has now begun. Feel free to utilize this process as often as you

feel called to do so.

 HELPING YOUR CLIENT DEVELOP THEIR INTUITION

Ask your client for their definition of intuition.

Fern Gorin’s definition: The voice of God, your higher self (your name), guidance,
and inner wisdom. Connecting to all wisdom and resources inside and out.

Einstein said: "The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful
servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the

gift."

Ask your client to remember a time or times they really had a strong intuition about

something. Ask them to tell you about those experiences and how they connected to

their intuition. Did they sense it, hear it, see it or just know it all at once? If they can

identify how they receive their intuition, it will help them have a stronger connection.

Here’s an exercise you might guide them in;

INTUITION EXERCISE: Close your eyes and take some nice deep breaths. Allow each
breath to take you deeper, allowing yourself to become completely relaxed. Now,

remember a time when you had a strong intuition about something. Did you feel it as

a knot in your stomach, a warm feeling in your heart, butterflies in your belly, or some

other body sensation? Did you hear or get a sense of a “Yes, that feels right,” or, “No,

this does not feel right?” Did you hear an inner voice, your higher self, (or your name)

talking to you?

Now, we’re going to identify a truth signal – a signal that will clearly and accurately

guide you in the future to know what is a Yes or what is a No. In other words, what is

a “Yes, this feels right, this feels good; this is the direction to go.” Versus, what is “No,

this does not feel right, this does not feel good, this is not the direction to go.” Tune

into your body and get fully present as you get in touch with your intuition.

Now, imagine a favorite flower or a rose. Picture how it looks, the stems, the leaves,

and the petals. Feel the vibrance of its energy.

Now, clear away that image and ask your intuition to show you what your flower looks

like when the answer is Yes? Tune into all the details, the petals, the stem, and the

leaves. Notice how this answer feels in your body.

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Now, clear that image and ask your intuition to show you what your flower looks like

when the answer is No? Tune in to all the details, the petals, the stem, and leaves.

Notice how this answer feels in your body.

Now clear away that image.

Is there something specific you would like to use your intuition with? Think of a yes/no

question. Get clear on your question. Ask it now, “What is my intuition on this?” Be

open to your intuitive signals and whatever information you receive. Notice what you

sense and how you feel about your answer.

Remember, your intuition is always with you; you may turn to it at any time. You can

use it at any time to help you in your life as long as you get fully present. It is a

wonderful resource. Now, gently come back to the room, feeling refreshed, alert,

feeling wonderful.

Debrief the experience.

Mixed Intuition
Educate your client that what makes intuition confusing is that it is often not 100%

“yes.” It is 70/30, 60/40, 50/50. It is confusing for us. We then need to ask, “What is

the 70%? What is the 30%? What is the 60%? What is the 40%?”

Here’s a 6-step process to help a client sort out a mixed intuition:

1. What is your intuition saying about ______? What % is yes and what % is no?

2. What is the ____ (40, 50, 60%, etc.) about?

3. What is the ______ (60, 50, 40%, etc.) about?

4. Listen for the client’s priorities. Make sure each priority is stated in a positive

way. Instead of saying, “I don’t like …,” the client needs to come up with what

they do want and do like. Ask powerful questions to draw out positive choices

and priorities.

5. Feedback the client’s priorities and have them determine the order of priority

from 1 on.

6. “Now that we’ve discussed this, what did you discover (or what did you decide)

about this issue?”

 Here’s an example:

The client is deciding whether to leave their job.

Coach: What percentage is yes: go ahead and leave your job?

Client: 60%.

Coach: What percentage is no: don’t leave your job?

Client: 40%.

Coach: What’s the 60% about?

Client: I’m really bored and I feel like I’m not getting paid what I’m worth. I would

like to do something else that interests me.

Coach: What’s the 40% about?

Client: I know my job is secure, and because I know it so well, I can spend more

time on my hobbies. Plus, I would really miss my co-workers.

Coach: When you say you’re bored, what do you want instead?

Client: I want to be challenged.

Coach: Are you saying you want more challenging work?

Client: Yes.

Coach: So, I heard your priorities are: more challenging work, work that interests

you, more money, job security, time for your hobbies, co-workers you like. Does that

sound correct?

Client: Yes.

Coach: Please prioritize these 6 things from 1 to 6.

Client:
1. Work that interests me

2. Challenging work

3. More money

4. Job security

5. Time for hobbies

6. Coworkers I like

Coach: Now that we've discussed this, what did you discover?

Client: I really want to do more interesting work that’s more challenging and pays

more. I definitely want to leave my job.

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 YOUR SPIRITUAL GROWTH ASSESSMENT
On the following page is a handout called “Your Spiritual Growth Assessment”
You can either use this as a resource to hand out to your client, or you can use

Powerful Questioning in discussing this handout.

Ask questions such as:

What does this mean to you?

What is occurring that you’re now at a (number, e.g., 5)?

What would getting to a (number, e.g., 8) look like?

If you move to an 8, how will this impact your life?

On a scale from 1 to 10, how motivated are you to live this way? What’s keeping

you from feeling motivated?

What changes would you have to make in your life to get to a (number, e.g., 8)?

How could you do that? How else could you do that?

ICF Core Competency: Creating Awareness, Powerful Questioning, Establishing the

Coaching Agreement, Active Listening
 YOUR SPIRITUAL GROWTH ASSESSMENT
During the training, you are invited to focus on your own spiritual growth.

Here are some things that might be part of your spiritual growth. Please rate yourself

on a scale from 1 to 10, with 10 meaning you are masterful with that issue. You can

write N/A if the item does not seem to fit with your spirituality. Feel free to add any

things that would make you more spiritually masterful.

Living in alignment with your spiritual values

Implementing spirituality into your daily life

Staying connected to and experiencing God (your name), your higher

power, oneness throughout your day

Living in faith, trust, surrender

Treating others with kindness, compassion, and acceptance

Treating yourself with kindness, compassion, and acceptance (self-love)

Operating with integrity

Forgiving yourself and others

Doing activities that nurture your soul

Following God’s will

Instead of complaining, you come from a spiritual level to make things better

Communicating what you need to (you’re not withholding communications)

Making time for daily spiritual practices

Spending time in nature, prayer, meditation

Going to church or a spiritual center or group that helps you tap into your

spirituality

What you do in life matches your positive intentions and spiritual values

Staying in a peaceful and centered space

Opening up to or expanding higher consciousness

Other__________________________________________

Other__________________________________________

Other__________________________________________

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