Miguel Bueno

The Effects of Bad Communication

Bad communication can lead to destructive patterns that may harm you and the relationships
around you. However, bad communication doesn’t only mean the lack of communication, it can
also refer to grudges, blaming, and consistent arguments. Bad communication may cause stress,
lack of trust, misunderstandings, and can lead to harmful consequences due to harmed
relationships. But where do problems with communication come from? Stresses outside of our
relationships may be the cause of our poor approach to communication. Anything from work,
school, or even personal problems we may not want to share will find a way to affect those
around us indirectly. Our personalities also play a huge role in the way we handle and face our
problems. For example, people with big egos may frequently find themselves in an argument
due to their inflated sense of self importance and desire to always be in the right. Also, as
humans we’re naturally defensive, fear of being hurt may be one of the main factors people lack
communication in the first place. As a result of this fear, we may misinterpret some
communication cues and take offense. For example, according to Ioana A. Cionea’s research,
“...people may be relying on the same faulty decision-making mechanisms (such as taking
conflict personally; Hample and Dallinger 1993; Hample et al. 1995) and engaging in destructive
arguments.” No matter how defensive a person may be, winning an argument hardly ever
benefits the arguer. To give you an idea, Cionea argues that “Winning the argument may be
perceived as costly, rather than as beneficial, if the consequences of winning involved relational
harm.” This shows how arguments, regardless of victory or defeat, will ultimately result in
negative consequences due to the harm caused between both parties. Especially if, and almost
certainly if, the argument holds no intellectual benefit. As a result relationships will be damaged,
the arguer will feel unsettled, and nobody wins.