Title: Comparative Poetry

Connect:

Which of the following words/phrases can be used in a comparative poetry essay:

Similarly equally Resutling in

Before in the same way Due to the fact
Likewise Lastly in contrast
Consequently on the other hand However
therefore Nevertheless In Conclusion

Investigate:

1. You are going to read two poetry essays. As you read I want you to
annotate/highlight where you see the use of AO1, AO2, and AO3.

AO1: Read, understand and respond to texts. Students should be able to:
-maintain a critical style and develop an informed personal response (make clear comparative
points)
-use textual references, including quotations, to support and illustrate interpretations.
AO2: Analyse the language, form and structure used by a writer to create meanings and effects,
using relevant subject terminology where appropriate.
AO3: Show understanding of the relationships between texts and the contexts in which they were
written.

Afterwards, use the mark scheme to assign a level for the essay and write a WWW and EBI.

Essay 1:

Compare how poets present the ways people are affected by difficult experiences in ‘Remains’ and
in one other poem from ‘Power and conflict’.

Simon Armitage and Jane Weir present ways people are affected by difficult experiences in
Remains and in poppies.

Simon Armitage uses the poem Remains to show us how soldiers are affected by war. This is first
shown to us, in Stanza 1 line 4. When Armitage writes “probably armed possibly not” this suggests
that the solder is uncertain and is left doubting himself as he doesn’t know if he is in danger or not.

Armitage shows us how the soldiers have been left uneasy and terrified for their lives when he
writes “myself and sombody else and sombody else are all of the same mind” Armitage uses
repitition to show how the soldiers are all connected through their experience and although they
are not aware of who they are with, they all know that they have to make the dicision of the
persons life before they end up getting killed themselves.
In Stanza 5, Simon Armitage talks about how the men have gained PTSD, due to going to war.
This is shown when the auther writes “End of story, except not really”. The writer uses a simile to
show how he thought it would the the last time, he would think about what happened to the other
man, but it isn’t as he has now been left with PTSD.
“His blood shadow stays on the street”. The writer uses a metaphor to show how the image of the
man never leaves his mind. “Then I'm home on leave. But I blink and he bursts again” suggests to
us that he is mentally damaged by the events which occurred while he was at war.
The writer uses repatition of “probably armed, possibly not” to show us how the soldire is left
doubting himself as he may of killed an innocent man. On line 27, the writer begins to explain how
the soldire is left traumatised, this is shown when Armitage writes “not left for dead in some distant,
sun-stunned, sand-smothered land or six-feet-under in desert sand”. This shows us that the man
may be dead, but the memory of his death remains alive in the soldires head. Armitage uses
alliteration and repitition of the letter ‘S’ to show us that the sound of the bullets flying through the
air never leave him aswell.

Armitage finishes his poem of with “his bloody life in my bloody hands” implying to us that the
memory of the mans death will never leave him.
Jane Weir uses the poem “poppies” to show how people who were left at home from war were
affected. In this poem she uses the character of a mother to show how she was affected by her son
leaving for war.

The quote “single dove flew from the pear tree” shows that the mother is ready to let her son go to
war. The writer uses the noun ‘dove’ to show that the love she feels for her son will never leave her
although he will.
Later on in the poem, Jane Weir writes “Play at being eskimos” this shows us that the mother is
physically and mentally affected by her son leaving that she is starting to remember his childhood.
This also suggests to us that her journey into memories has just begun.

The Auther uses words like “overflowing like a treasure chest” to show us how emotionally she is
being affected, the simile also shows us that the mother is too emotional to handle herself.

Both Authers use enjambent to show how people are affected by difficult situations. Jane Weir
uses enjambent to show the mothers journey into her memories, whereas Simon Armitage uses
enjambent to show how war and the death of the man has affected him mentally. Jane Weir uses
an absent rhyme scheme to show the absense of her son, however, Armitage uses a broken
rhyme scheme to show how he is mentally damaged.
The Authers both show how people are affected mentally and emotionly by difficult situations or in
this case, how they are affected by war.

Essay 2:

Remains is about a man who kills a man who is involved in a bank raid, he starts to feel guilty and
it plays on his mind that the man was “probably armed, possibly not”. The poem starts with setting
that it was “on another occasion”, this presents that the soldiers see bank raids and that sort of
stuff often, its not their first experience of dealing with “looters raiding a bank”.
War Photographer is written of someone who takes photographes of the men who died in the war.
He develops photos in “his darkroom, he is finally alone”. He feels fine when hes in the war zones
taking the photographs but when he returns home, he's on edge and feels hopeless.

Both poems are about the difficult experiences the men had to do with conflict. Remains starts off
written in first person plural. Armitage uses different ways of showing how there was a few people
involved. The man explained that they were “all of the same mind”, he's trying not to take full
responsibility for killing the looter, but the poem shifts to being first person singular at the end of the
poem where he says that the man has “his bloody life in my bloody hands”, the reference to bloody
hands could be a reference to Macbeth where they can't wash the blood of their hands, signifying
guilt. War Photographer is also written in first person, the man in war photographer feels that he
has to do what “someone must”, he feels its his duty to bring awareness to the results of conflict. In
War Photographer the irony of “his hands, which did not tremble then, though seem to now”
portrays how during the time spent away he feels more calm contrasting to the anxiety he feels
when hes back home in “Rural England”.

Both poems show some anger. In remains the man is angry at himself for shooting someone who
might not have been armed. Armitage presents guilt as one of the main factors of the ways people
are affected by difficult experiences, he expresses how the man is ”on the ground, sort of inside
out” which uses a childs like description to portray how the man in Remains is unable to process
the fact he killed that looter. In War Photographer, Duffy shows anger through how the
photographer feels angry at the people in England who’s “eyes price with tears”, he believes that
they might feel sorry for a moment but then they quickly go back to continuing with what they're
doing. Duffy highlights the photographers feelings that the people “do not care”.

Remains and war photographer both show conflict as having negative effects on people. The men
are both faced with difficult experiencing and have similar experiences after seeing the conflict, like
in Remains the “drink and drugs won’t flush him out” shows that he's feeling guilty and anxious.
Memories of the events replays in both poems, in War Photographer, when the pictures develop a
“half-formed ghost” starts to appear, and the man remembers “the cry of this mans wife”, which
gives the reader a sad imagery of the pain the wife felt. Memory’s are also shown in Remains as
on patrol the soldier has to walk over his “blood-shadow”, “week after week”. This reflects how the
guilt will ‘remain’ with him for the rest of his life.

Both poets use voltas too change the tone of the poem. In remains the volta is in line 17 where it’s
the “End of the story, except not really”, and in War Photographer the use of the word “when” is the
volta, explaining how the mans body is starting to appear, this switches the focus onto an individual
in war. The use of the voltas are turning points in the poems, they switch the focus of the poem
onto other things, in Remains it switches to almost a confession where he talks of himself and how
he killed the man. The voltas help to move the poems along.

In Remains, Armitage uses enjambment with “I see every round as it rips through his life – I see
broad daylight on the other side”, the language technique of enjambment shows a discriptive
portrayal of what the man look like as he was shot. It makes the killing seem more dramatic and
violent. War Photographer includes the line “children running in a nightmare heat” to make the
reader understand how war even effects the children, this makes war ever sadder and more violent
when children are involved.
Overall, both poems show the ways people are affected by difficult experiences. Remains and War
Photographer are both poems showing how conflict effects people. Armitage and Duffy both use
descriptive language to fully portray the evidence of violence

Mark Scheme:

Exhibit:

Considering everything you have read and marked, plan a response to the above question
(your last assessment question). This will help you when we do our feedback lesson and
work on improving our responses.
 Planning sheet

Key similarities and differences – both poems

Story of each
poem?
Message or
purpose?
Main similarities
/ differences?
V 1. Poem 1:

Voice and tone

2. Poem 2:

L 1. Poem 1:

Language and
imagery 2. Poem 2:

S 1. Poem 1:

Structure
2. Poem 2:

Conclusion
Which poem
conflict or power
most effectively?

EXT:

Write a paragraph in response to the question