STEPS INVOLVED IN FORMING A SUPPORT

GROUP AND RUNNING IT EFFECTIVELY

It documented that support groups are
helpful to people dealing with a broad
range of life challenges, losses, and
traumas. For burn survivors, finding a
support group of people who understand
the long journey back after a burn injury
and who can therefore offer hope and
direction in the process of recovery is a
godsend. Support groups can decrease the
sense of isolation and stigmatization that
many people feel.

ORGANIZING A GROUP
Setting up a support group would seem a
fairly simple task—find a room, set a time
to meet, decide if the group will be
facilitated or self-run by survivors, put out
the cookies and chairs, and send out the
flyers. Creating emotional safety in a
support group is quite another matter and
deserves specific attention.
When my daughter was a little girl she
used to write recipes for me to try—my
favourite was Lion Soup which she wrote
at about age 4. The recipe began with
“First you catch a lion.” Creating emotional
safety in a support group can be like that.
What sounds easy can actually be a
complex process. However, this process
can be broken down into a number of
essential ingredients.

ESTABLISHING GUIDELINES
Of the many factors to consider in creating
emotional safety in any support group, the
most essential are confidentiality, the
appropriate responses to feelings and the
practice of unconditional presence, and a
respect for boundaries. Setting the ground
rules regarding these specific factors at the
beginning of each support group
establishes the safety for the group. It is
important to briefly restate these ground
rules even if the same group of people
meet consistently and anytime people
arrive after the ground rules have been
stated.

MAINTAINING CONFIDENTIALITY
Establishing the confidential nature of
what is shared in the group is an essential
ground rule for any support group. Stating
clearly, “What is shared in this room, stays
in this room,” and then asking the group
members to commit to this boundary is
the beginning of establishing group safety.
It is not okay to share other people’s
stories or details of their life that they
might choose to reveal in a support group.
Maintaining confidentiality is essential to
the foundation on which the emotional
safety of a support group rests.

CREATING A SAFE PLACE FOR FEELINGS

Many people were taught that some
feelings are acceptable and others are not,
that some feelings are negative and others
are positive, and that somehow we need
to be rescued from our feelings, especially
painful ones such as anger, sadness, hurt,
fear, hopelessness, helplessness, and guilt.
Many people have had their feelings
shamed in their family of origin and have
anxiety about risking sharing feelings in a
group. The reality is that in order to move
through grief and recover from trauma,
survivors need to be able to feel and
release their feelings. When the following
basic principles about feelings are
honoured, safety for feelings can be
created in a relationship or a group:
 Feelings are neither right nor wrong,
good nor bad. All feelings are okay and
do not require either a negative or
positive judgment.
  Feelings are meant to be transient
visitors, they are not meant to take up
permanent residence in our psyche.
 Telling someone they should or
shouldn’t feel something does not help
them, but rather causes feelings to
become distorted or blocked.
 Feelings can be released when they are
heard with compassion, empathy,
respect, and a lack of judgment. This is
what unconditional presence means.

RESPECTING BOUNDARIES
Respecting the physical, emotional,
spiritual, and intellectual boundaries of
members of a support group is also an
essential element in creating group safety.
Sometimes people have difficulty hearing
the struggle, emotional pain, or seeing the
tears of another without needing to rescue
them. This is most often due to some
unresolved issue or pain of their own.
Rescuing can present in a support group as
interrupting, telling people what to do
about their problems, and/or physical
rescuing, such as uninvited or unsolicited
hugs.
Respect for spiritual boundaries requires
that the group be accepting of and a safe
space for diverse religious and spiritual
belief systems. It is not appropriate to use
the group’s time to try to convince people
about any specific religion or spiritual
belief. Many burn survivors share
profound spiritual experiences related to
their burn injury and it is, of course,
appropriate to share one’s own experience
if you choose to.
Telling someone what they should or
should not be thinking, feeling, or doing is
most often not helpful. Exceptions to this
often occurs at the end of a group meeting
after everyone has had a chance to share
uninterrupted in the group and the group
has naturally moved into a problem solving
mode. At this time, sharing specific
suggestions or how members have dealt
with specific issues can be supportive and
helpful. The key is to first allow each
member a chance to share uninterrupted.
Many times survivors just need the time to
share their story, harrowing as that may
be, and to have that heard and witnessed.
It is also important to establish that there
is not an expectation that everyone share
in the group—this clarification also creates
safety. Whoever is facilitating the group
needs to be aware of the time and keep
the group on task during sharing.
Occasionally, there may be someone who
dominates the group’s time or who is stuck
in their own story, having told it many
times in the past. It is important to keep
the group moving while at the same time
setting limits on monopolizing behaviours
in a kind and compassionate manner.
SUPPORTING THE PHASES OF RECOVERY
AND HEALING
In Trauma and Recovery (1997),
psychiatrist Judith Herman, MD, states
that healing after trauma and traumatic
loss consists of 3 elements:
  Remembering and mourning
 Telling one’s story
 Reconnecting with life
A well-structured and well-maintained
support group can support all three of
these necessary phases of healing and
recovery after burn trauma. Creating
emotional safety is the essential
foundation for a support group that truly
supports recovery and healing.

ROLE OF SUPPORT GROUP IN CANCER

Support groups are meetings for people

with cancer and anyone touched by the
disease. They can have many benefits.
Even though a lot of people receive
support from friends and family, the
number one reason they join a support
group is to be with others who have similar
cancer experiences. Some research shows
that joining a support group improves both
quality of life and survival.

Support groups can:

 Help you feel better, more hopeful, and

not so alone
 Give you a chance to talk about your
feelings and work through them
 Help you deal with practical problems,
such as problems at work or school
 Help you cope with side effects of
treatment
Types of Support Groups
Some groups focus on all kinds of cancer.
Others talk about just one kind, such as a
group for women with breast cancer or
one for men with prostate cancer. Some
can be open to everyone or just for people
of a certain age, sex, culture, or religion.
For instance, some groups are just for
teens or young children.

Support groups can also be helpful for

children or family members. These groups
focus on family concerns such as role
changes, relationship changes, financial
worries, and how to support the person
with cancer. Some groups include both
cancer survivors and family members.
Online support groups are “meetings” that
take place online. People meet through
chat rooms, webinars, social media (such
as Twitter or Facebook), or moderated
discussion groups. People often like online
support groups because they can take part
in them any time of the day or night.
They’re also good for people who can’t
travel to meetings, or live in rural areas.
Some are sponsored by cancer
organizations, while others aren’t
monitored. Therefore, always check with
your doctor about any cancer information
you receive to make sure it’s correct.

Telephone support groups are when

everyone dials in to a phone line that is
linked together, like a conference call.
They can share and talk to others with
similar experiences from all over the
country. There is usually little or no charge.

ROLE OF SUPPORT GROUP IN AIDS

“I wanted to see other people with HIV.

We gained strength just from knowing
each other”
HIV support group participant, South Africa

The stigma surrounding HIV and AIDS

makes life more difficult for people living
with HIV and AIDS and their families.
Loneliness, anxiety, stress, confusion,
bitterness and depression can make people
more vulnerable to illness if they do not
get any kind of support. People living with
HIV and AIDS need a lot of emotional,
spiritual, psychological, social, physical and
clinical support.

Different people and different institutions

can provide some support, but it is
important for people living with HIV and
AIDS to come together and support one
another. People living with HIV and AIDS
would know better what their hopes, joys,
anxieties, fears and needs are and they are
the ones who should define how best they
want to be understood and treated.

Some of the common needs of people

living with HIV and AIDS are:
 Health and medical supplies and skilled
medical services.
 Counselling to reduce isolation and
promote acceptance.
 Community support groups to provide
a safe place where feelings and advice
can be shared.
 Spiritual support such as prayer groups
and home visits by religious leaders.
 Social acceptance to help people living
with HIV and AIDS by visiting them and
treating them like friends.
 Physical care such as bathing, cleaning
their homes when they are sick, and
any other thing they are not able to do
on their own.
  Nutritional help so that families
improve their diets using cheap and
available foods.
 Safe clean water that has been boiled
or treated with chlorine.
 Accurate information about HIV and
AIDS.

Aims of support groups

Support groups can be set up for many

different reasons. Here are a few:

 To provide emotional support and

coping mechanisms to those people
who are undergoing a difficult time in
 their lives, and are willing to be part of
a support group.
 To provide information for its members
so that they can understand the disease
and be able to educate their family
members, friends, colleagues,
neighbours about the disease.
 To draw strength from other members
experiences.
 To share information around
treatment, care and healing.
 To educate people about antiretroviral
medication and to encourage people to
keep taking their medication.
 To build a social network of people
with similar problems.
 To improve the quality of life of people
living with HIV and AIDS and their
families.
 To ensure that a person living with HIV
and AIDS can live a positive and
productive life.
 To empower members with knowledge
about HIV and AIDS and help them
develop skills.
 To create networking opportunities for
those involved in the support group.
 To reduce isolation and discrimination
while encouraging acceptance around
HIV and AIDS.
 To demystify the disease and promote
de-stigmatisation and community
acceptance of people living with HIV
and AIDS and their families.
  To strengthen HIV prevention messages
by encouraging the community to have
contact with people living with HIV and
AIDS.

ROLE OF SUPPORT GROUPS IN ALCOHOL

DEPENDENCE

People who are in treatment for

alcoholism often need additional support
to help them overcome their addiction. So
do the family members and close friends
who are trying to help them.

Support groups and alcohol dependency

recovery organizations can be an essential
part of the journey. These groups can help
people in recovery avoid relapses, deal
with the challenges of getting sober, and
provide support to family members and
friends.

Read more about some of the groups

dedicated to helping people accomplish
these goals.

Alcoholics Anonymous
Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) is a support
group that helps people recover from
alcohol dependency. It offers group
sessions, and what is often termed as a
“sober support” network.
Some people who attend AA will actively
seek out another group member, or
sponsor, who has generally been sober for
an extended period of time. A sponsor can
help provide additional support to
someone struggling with alcohol addiction.

Sponsors can also provide encouragement

and promote accountability. They often
help with what is known as “step work” in
which a person works through the 12 steps
of AA in order to achieve and maintain
sobriety.

Al-Anon family groups

Al-Anon is a support network for people
affected by someone else’s alcohol abuse.
You can use this group to connect with
other people facing similar challenges.

Together, you can gain a greater

understanding of how to help your loved
one face their addiction. Al-Anon can also
help you cope with the effects that a loved
one’s alcoholism can have on you.

A local chapter of AA can help you connect

with an Al-Anon group. You can also ask
your local hospital’s healthcare outreach
office for more information, visit the Al-
Anon website, or call 888-425-2666.

Alateen
Alateen is a support group for the children
of parents with alcohol abuse problems.
This group provides the opportunity to
share personal experiences. Less focus is
put on receiving lessons or instructions.

Alateen can help you connect with other

young people facing similar challenges. It
can help you find support and get more
comfortable reaching out for help.

National Council on Alcoholism and Drug

Dependence (NCADD)
If you have an alcohol dependence
problem, NCADD can direct you to
healthcare professionals. It can also
connect you with other people coping with
similar problems.
If you have a family member or friend with
an alcohol dependence problem, NCADD
offers services that can help you prepare
an intervention. And they can help you
find appropriate treatment for your loved
one. NCADD can also connect you with
other individuals in similar positions. You
can ask questions, share information, and
help each other learn to cope.

National Association for Children of

Alcoholics (NACoA)
NACoA provides training and education for
clergy, teachers, doctors, and social
workers. The association offers instruction
on how to support children with alcohol-
dependent parents. NACoA doesn’t
provide direct assistance to children in the
form of support groups or therapy.
However, it can help them connect to
organizations that do.

National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and

Alcoholism (NIAAA)
The NIAAA offers free pamphlets and
publications to help addicts, family
members, and healthcare professionals
learn how to address alcohol abuse and
alcoholism.

Reach out for support

Drinking too much alcohol can cause many
problems. It can impair your judgment and
your ability to make decisions. It can raise
your risk of accidental injury, relationship
problems, and issues at school or work. It
can also raise your risk of many health
conditions, such as:

 Liver disease
 High blood pressure
 Heart attack
 Stroke
 Cancer
If you or someone you love has an alcohol
abuse problem, it’s important to get help.
There are many organizations that offer
information and support.