Week 5 Discussion: Relationship

Building
This week's materials take a close look at interpersonal attraction. As social
animals, the concepts presented within this week's chapters may seem at times
obvious or simplistic. However, consider how you develop friendships and
establish a rapport with a prospective "special someone." As you stand there
interacting with another person do you think to yourself…

1. (proximity) "If I lived somewhere else I wouldn't even know or like this
person."
2. (affect) "If I were in a better mood this person would almost seem ok,
but since I'm not, I don't care for him/her."
3. (attractiveness) "If only I could get past how good looking this person
is/is not…I wonder what they are really like."
4. (attractiveness) "He is really good looking…he has to be a trustworthy
car salesman"
5. (attractiveness) "She is too beautiful to be smart."

Your Task

Pick one topic from these four options:

1. Post a brief analysis that ranks, in order of importance, the factors that lead
to attraction in chapter 8.
2. Discuss, at what level do we have control over who we find attractive?
3. Discuss, do we have control over who we like?
4. Read chapter 9 and discuss why people do good deeds?
In your main response, include four vocabulary words form the reading.
Part 2: Constructive Peer Feedback: In addition to posting your thoughts to
the main entry questions, respond to at least TWO (2) of your classmates'
entries that address a question different from the one you were
assigned. In 5 or more sentences, provide constructive feedback. Do you
have some additional thoughts on the topic? Share them. When providing
your feedback present the logic behind it.
Main post due Sunday 6/18 by 11:59PM, Peer responses due 6/20 by
11:59PM.

 Desiree's Week 5 Discussion

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Desiree Slade posted Jun 15, 2023 3:35 AM
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Hello Class,
I picked topic number three, discuss, do we have control over who we
like?
In order to answer this question, we have to understand a couple of
things. There are four concepts we have to explore. Let's start off with
similarity. Essentially, similarity is exactly how it sounds. Once you
establish an attraction to someone, having the same interests, values,
beliefs, dislikes, etc. is important in liking someone. When friends,
family, or spouse share beliefs, values, age, education, race, religion,
etc. we tend to like them. Having things in common makes things easier
and leads to attraction or liking someone. Imagine being with a partner
who is only interested in Kung-Fu movies, while you are only interested
in Marvel movies. Do you see the conflict here? What other
dissimilarities do you two have? It will create real problems for your
relationship, so having similarities increases our tendency to liking
someone. Another aspect of this concept is that we tend to like people
with the same status as us. Our assigned reading gives the example,
when you see an attractive person with a less attractive person, the less
attractive person is most likely offering social status in return that may
not be visible.
Another aspect of this concept that is important to note is that we tend
to like people who like us just as much as we like them. The next the
concept in liking someone is proximity. Proximity says that you will
probably marry someone who attends the same school as you, works in
the same career, lives in the same area as you, or is similar to you in
some other way. A term to mention is proximity liking which means
that people tend to become fonder of one another when they are in
repeated contact in a social setting. For instance, you could say me
working with my husband prior to getting married to him, since we had
repeated contact, we were more likely to either become friends or
romantic partners. Then, there is the mere contact effect, which states
that just seeing people more frequently increases the chances of us
liking each other.

The third concept to mention is affect and attraction. When it comes to

affect, we tend to be drawn to people more when we are in a good
mood, rather than when we are in a bad mood. When we have an
attraction towards someone we usually are in a good mood, and end up
liking them even more. It is important to mention, that you can create
this positive affect by bringing someone flowers, telling a joke, or some
other form of a kind gesture.
Finally, the concept of arousal and attraction is important to mention as
well. Arousal can cause you to dislike or like someone regardless of
attraction. Chapter 7 gives the perfect example of having some male
college students run in place, and afterwards the men watched a video
of either an attractive or unattractive and the women discussed hobbies
and interests while mentioning that they did not have a boyfriend. Some
men were told that they would be seeing the woman in the video soon
and were asked to rate her attractiveness. The researchers found that the
men who were aroused by running in place liked the attractive woman
more than the unattractive woman less than those men who were not
aroused (Jhangiani , R., & Tarry, H..,2014).
Now understanding these four concepts, let's discuss if we have control
over who we like.
I believe to an extent we do have some control. We can take our
similarities into consideration when getting to know someone. Although
we share similar interests, we may take other things into account such as
their dislikes that may be detrimental to liking them. For instance, you
meet someone out at a comic store, looking for comics, so you spark up
some conversation about different comics you like and find that you
have similar taste in comics, so you ask them out to lunch. You think
you might like them, however, while at lunch you find that dislike dogs
and you own two dogs. While a less problematic example, you have
control if you want to continue a friendship or romantic relationship
with this person.
When it comes to proximity, we can be aware in certain situations that
you may only like this person because of mere exposure. For instance, I
had a friend in high school, we were always in the same classes and
around the same people, and over time we ended up being friends.
Later, we discovered that we did not have much in common, when we
started to hang out outside of school. So, I had control in the end to
recognize that we were just meant to be acquaintances and nothing more
than that. I had control over whether or not we should be friends.
However, there are some occasions where it is out of your control. For
example, when I met my husband it felt kind of like fate, we were
always scheduled on the same shifts at work, we had the same friend
group, and we were frequently in the same social settings. The mere
exposure on top of proximity liking came into play here. We were
always around each other and in the same social circle, so it was sort of
out of our hands. However, I do acknowledge that we both had the
opportunity to just be friends, but the more we learned about each other
more we began to like each other.
When it comes to affect and attraction, I believe we have control over
who we like. Your mood is determined by you, while one person may
find a joke funny, another may not. Therefore, your mood is controlled
by you. In addition to this, whether you are in a good mood or bad
mood, you can decide based on other factors if you like someone or not.
You can be in a bad mood and still like someone, and be in a good
mood and not like them.
Finally, arousal does not have control over who we like. We can
recognize our arousal may cloud our judgement and make sounds
decisions on who we like with a clear mind later. Arousal is temporary,
 and you eventually come back to reality to understand whether or not
you actually like the person or if it your arousal clouding your
judgement.
Overall, I believe we mostly have control over who we like. We may
have similar interests, be close in proximity, in a good mood, or
aroused, but, ultimately, we have the power to decide who we do or do
not like.
Reference:
Jhangiani , R., & Tarry, H. (2014). Chapter 7. Liking and Loving. In
Principles of Social Psychology. Creative Commons
Attribution. https://opentextbc.ca/socialpsychology/part/attitudes-
behaviour-and-persuasion/
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 Week 5
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Jesseca Whitehurst posted Jun 14, 2023 10:18 PM
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I will address option 2: Discuss, at what level do we have control over
who we find attractive?
In terms of interpersonal attraction, there are multiple factors that
influence whom we find attractive, and some of these factors are within
our control, while others are not. Attraction is a complex phenomenon
influenced by various elements such as physical appearance, personality
traits, shared interests, and social and cultural norms. Let's explore the
different levels of control we have over our attractions:
1. Innate Preferences: Some aspects of attraction are believed to be
biologically ingrained, such as preferences for symmetry, facial
features, and body proportions. These innate preferences may not
be under our conscious control, as they are often influenced by
evolutionary factors and genetic predispositions.
2. Cultural and Social Influences: Our cultural and social
environments play a significant role in shaping our perception of
attractiveness. Societal standards of beauty, cultural ideals, and
media portrayals can influence our preferences and perceptions.
While we may not have direct control over these influences, we
can actively engage in critical thinking and challenge societal
beauty norms to broaden our perspectives on attractiveness.
3. Personal Experiences and Beliefs: Our personal experiences and
beliefs can shape our preferences and attractions. Positive or
negative experiences with individuals who possess certain
qualities can influence our subsequent attractions. Additionally,
our beliefs about relationships, values, and personal goals can also
influence whom we find attractive. While we may not have direct
control over our experiences, we can actively reflect on and
challenge our beliefs to broaden our scope of attraction.
4. Individual Agency: While there are certain factors beyond our
control, we do have a level of agency in determining our
attractions. By being aware of our own biases, prejudices, and
stereotypes, we can actively challenge and reevaluate our
preferences. We can broaden our horizons by seeking out diverse
experiences, interacting with individuals from different
backgrounds, and consciously examining the qualities we find
attractive.
In summary, the factors that contribute to attraction are multifaceted,
and while some aspects may be beyond our immediate control, we do
have agency in shaping our attractions through self-reflection,
challenging societal norms, and expanding our perspectives. By
cultivating awareness and actively engaging with different perspectives,
 we can broaden our understanding of attractiveness and potentially
develop more inclusive and diverse attractions.
Four vocabulary words from the reading:

5. Ingrained: Deeply established or firmly fixed.

6. Predispositions: Tendencies or inclinations that make someone
susceptible to a particular behavior or condition.
7. Perception: The way in which something is regarded, understood,
or interpreted.
8. Stereotypes: Widely held but oversimplified and generalized
beliefs or ideas about a particular group or category of people.

Reference:
Jhangiani, R., & Tarry, H. (2014). Principles of social psychology (1st
international ed.). BCcampus. https://opentextbc.ca/socialpsychology/
Jesseca
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 Week 5 - Kenneth T.
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Kenneth Trottier posted Jun 15, 2023 1:48 PM
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will address option 1: Post a brief analysis that ranks, in order of
importance, the factors that lead to attraction in chapter 8.
 1. Proximity: Proximity refers to physical or geographical closeness
between individuals. It is considered a fundamental factor in
attraction because frequent exposure to someone increases
familiarity and the likelihood of developing a connection.
2. Similarity: Similarity refers to the extent to which individuals
share common characteristics, values, attitudes, and interests.
People are often attracted to those who are similar to themselves
because it facilitates understanding, validation, and the potential
for enjoyable interactions.
3. Physical Attractiveness: Physical attractiveness plays a significant
role in initial attraction. While beauty standards can vary across
cultures and individuals, there is a general tendency for people to
be attracted to those whom they perceive as physically appealing.
This can include factors such as facial symmetry, body
proportions, and grooming.
4. Affect and Attraction: Affect refers to the emotional responses or
feelings that individuals experience in the presence of others.
Positive affect, such as happiness, joy, or excitement, can
contribute to feelings of attraction towards someone. Similarly,
negative affect, such as anger, sadness, or anxiety, can diminish or
inhibit attraction. Our emotional state and the affect we
experience can greatly influence our level of attraction to another
person
Four vocabulary words from the reading:
Companionate Love: defined as love that is based on friendship, mutual
attraction, common interests, mutual respect, and concern for each
other’s welfare.
Self Disclosure: the tendency to communicate frequently, without fear
of reprisal, and in an accepting and empathetic manner.
Exchange Relationships : relationships in which each of the partners
keeps track of his or her contributions to the partnership.
Communal Relationships : are close relationships in which partners
suspend their need for equity and exchange, giving support to the
partner in order to meet his or her needs, and without consideration of
the costs to themselves
 Kenneth T.
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 Week 5 Discussion: Topic 3
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Rylan Bennett posted Jun 15, 2023 3:35 PM
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I would argue that we have complete control over who we like.
Personality traits have a tendency to influence who we hang around as
well as what we like, but we as individuals can think for ourselves and
decide above it to branch out of our comfort zone and utilize effects
such as the mere exposure effect and proximity liking to find ourselves
new friends or acquaintances. In addition to this, we could also
utilize altruism to a degree and just generally be a helpful person around
other people. Doing so would promote not only your reputation as
someone to be liked but also reinforce why people should help
you, Reciprocal Altruism taking effect.
In essence, we choose who to surround ourselves with and who we
choose to like, as well as using our attitudes and actions to establish and
reinforce those relationships we have.
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 week5 topic 1
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Jacquette Anderson posted Jun 15, 2023 11:40 PM
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Post a brief analysis that ranks, in order of importance, the factors that
lead to attraction in chapter 8.
Proximity
Proximity allows people the opportunity to get to know one another and
discover their similarities, this can lead to a friendship or an intimate
relationship. Proximity is not just about geographic distance but rather
functional distance or the frequency with which we cross paths with
others. Therefore, some of us become close to co-workers and even best
friends; also, this is how some people met their future spouse. I have
seen this often in the hospital, since you’re there a lot you end up
getting to know your co-workers and build an attraction then the rest is
history. This is also why you see hospital medical staff dating polices
officers, EMTs, or even firefighters. They often cross paths with each
other, mere exposure effect refers to the tendency to prefer stimuli
(including, but not limited to, people) that we have seen frequently.
Physical Attractiveness
Physical attractiveness is how physically attracted are you to each other.
You’re most likely to be emotionally or romantically attracted to people
that you find attractive. There’s no standard of what’s attractive, each
person has their own idea of physical attractiveness.
Similarity
There’s a popular belief that opposite attracts but in reality, most
couples tend to be very similar whether it’s in age, social class,
education, values, and attitude. Being similar doesn’t mean that the
couple must be twins it’s means that they similar traits that help boost
their attraction for one another. For example, there were several of
people who used to think that my late husband and I were opposites.
Yes, we were different, but we had a lot of similarities like values and
attitude that boost our attraction beyond the physical component.
Affect & Attraction
When we find someone attractive, for instance, we experience positive
affect, and we end up liking the person even more. However, mood that
is created by causes other than the other person can also influence
liking.

Vocabulary words from reading:

Passionate love- The kind of love that we experience when we are first
getting to know a romantic partner.
Companionate love- love that is based on friendship, mutual attraction,
common interest, mutual respect, and concern for each other’s welfare.
Self-disclosure- the tendency to communicate frequently, without fear
of reprisal, and in an accepting and empathetic manner.
Exchange relationship- a relationship in which each partner keeps
track of their contributions to the partnership.

Jhangiani, R., & Tarry, H. (2014). Principles of social psychology (1st

international ed.). BCcampus. https://opentextbc.ca/socialpsychology/
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 Week 5 Discussion: Relationship Building
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Nicole Honeyblue posted Jun 14, 2023 4:17 PM
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Altruism is any behavior geared towards another individual's well-being
without the appearance of a direct reward for the person performing the
act (Jhangiani & Tarry, 2014). It can be expressed by offering a seat to
an older adult and a pregnant woman. Psychologically, the prefrontal
cortex and the amygdala are the areas of the brain responsible for
emotion and emotion regulation involved in empathy, altruism, and
helping (Jhangiani & Tarry, 2014).
Evolutionary psychologists believe that a feature of human nature is our
tendency to help others. They argue that helping others may be
inconvenient for individuals, but altruism benefits us as a species. It is
vital for an individual's genes to enhance behaviors such as altruism to
be passed down generationally and become a part of human nature
(Jhangiani & Tarry, 2014). Research has shown that people are
willingly helpful to kin and are more likely to help a close relative such
as a child, parent, or sibling than to help a distant relative such as a
grandparent, aunt, or nephew (Jhangiani & Tarry, 2014). In addition to
our genetic relationships, perceived similarities are another marker
people use as a determinant of helping others because it provides a
sense of "oneness" between the helper and the individual in need
(Jhangiani & Tarry, 2014).
 Logically, we tend to help people we are related to or to those that
provide a sense of "oneness;" however, reciprocal altruism is another
explanation for why people do good deeds. Reciprocal altruism is the
idea that if we help others now, those individuals will return the favor in
the future if needed (Jhangiani & Tarry, 2014). Chances of survival and
reproductive success are both increased when we help others.
Reciprocal altruism is an example of social exchange, meaning that
people use each other for protection from harm and benefit from gained
rewards. The text offers examples such as students exchanging
classroom notes or pet-sitting their neighbor's dog (Jhangiani & Tarry,
2014). Helping others is a part of our biological nature and is learned
through social experiences. (Jhangiani & Tarry, 2014).
Jhangiani, R., & Tarry, H. (2014). Principles of social psychology (1st
international ed.). BCcampus. https://opentextbc.ca/socialpsychology/
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 Week 5 Discussion - Fernandez - PSYC 321
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Raphael Fernandez posted Jun 6, 2023 8:25 PM
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1. Post a brief analysis that ranks, in order of importance, the factors
that lead to attraction in chapter 8 [7].
The book provides a solid framework for understanding the factors
leading to attraction, namely Physical Attractiveness, Similarity,
Proximity, Affect, and Arousal. I agree with this order, albeit with some
discrepancies, and will delve into each factor, offering my perspective
on their relative importance.

 Physical Attractiveness, the foremost factor, is complex,

encompassing various elements of attraction. Central to this is the
"what is beautiful is good" stereotype, an ingrained belief that
external beauty is indicative of positive internal qualities. This
concept, potentially rooted in our evolutionary development,
suggests that physical attractiveness serves as a gateway to other
factors, thereby underlining its significance in the initial stages of
attraction.

 Similarity, the second factor, is multifaceted, spanning trivial

preferences to profound alignments in life perspectives. It also
encompasses social exchange and equity, particularly the
reciprocation of attention. This principle posits that we are drawn
to those who reciprocate our feelings to a similar degree, fostering
relationship development and reinforcing its position as a crucial
factor in attraction.

 Proximity, the third factor, posits that frequent contact with a

person enhances our liking for them. This is encapsulated in two
concepts: proximity liking, which suggests that repeated social
interactions foster familiarity, and the mere exposure effect,
which posits that frequent exposure to a person increases our
preference for them. Thus, proximity to someone attractive and
similar to us can potentially solidify attraction.

 Affect and Arousal, though I consider them less critical, still play
roles in attraction. Affect pertains to mood, suggesting that our
feelings towards others are influenced by our emotional state.
 Arousal, on the other hand, is the physiological counterpart of
affect, with heightened arousal potentially amplifying attraction.

However, it's important to note that attraction is a dynamic process. This

dynamism is exemplified in companionate love, a relationship rooted
in intimacy and commitment, potentially devoid of passion or
infatuation. For instance, two close friends may not initially find each
other physically attractive, but their shared similarities and frequent
interactions could eventually spark attraction, bypassing my proposed
order of factors. Similarly, Affect and Arousal, being subject to rapid
changes, may not significantly impact the path to attraction, as changes
in physical attractiveness and similarity are typically more gradual.
In conclusion, while the order of factors provided offers a valuable
starting point, the dynamic nature of attraction suggests that these
factors can interact and evolve in unique ways across different
relationships.
References:
Jhangiani , R., & Tarry, H. (2014). Chapter 7. Liking and
Loving. Principles of Social Psychology. Creative Commons
Attribution. https://opentextbc.ca/socialpsychology/part/liking-and-
loving/
Kaufman, S. B. (2017). Why Physical Attraction Matters, and When It
Might Not. Psychology
Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/dating-and-mating/2
01701/why-physical-attraction-matters-and-when-it-might-not
Nicholson, J. (2017). Does Similarity Lead to Attraction and
Compatibility? Psychology
Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-attraction-
Selterman, D. (2018). Proximity and Preference: Why We Like Who
We Are Close To. Psychology
Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/lesson-plan-love/201
801/proximity-and-preference-why-we-who-we-are-close