The state of the Indiana first 19 years have coincided with an interesting time in the life of the urban Indian man, a period that has seen fundamental changesnotonly inhis lifestyle butalsoinhis values, aspirations, relationships with women and family and so on. His was the first generation of men to benefit directly from the opportunities unleashed by the economic liberalisation of the early 1990s and the internet revolution that came soon after. The material rewards that followed were accompanied by a profound remoulding of his life and thinking, in a manner that would not have been anticipated even a decade earlier. #Cb Ulka, one of the country's leading advertising agencies, recently_set out to. explore these changes througha project called ManMood, the largest single study ever conducted into the mind of the urban Indian man, Over 27 workshops were conducted and 16 in-home family interactions were held among SEC_A and B households, featuring men in the 16-44 age group in eight cities — Mumbai, Delhi, Chennai, Kolkata, Kochi, Mysore, Indore and Jodhpur — to get a fair representation of urban India, The study generated over 100 yours of free and frank conversations, which served as_a xich source of insight and understanding into the Indian man, These insights were further supplemented by the analysis of data points from secondary sources, such as the Indian Readership Survey and the Target Group Index, as well as literature reviews of almost_75 studies and reports, including the FCB Ulka Hindi magazine Study, The Cogito Consulting Reel vs Real Life Report and others. The study, compiled by Ruta Fatel, head of strategic planning at FCB Ulka Advertising, Mumbai, and Sunil Shetty, head of strategic planning at ¥0b KL, Malaysia, highlights seven key_truths about the new Indian man. The composite portrait thet emerges is not an encouraging one,Indian men in the 35+ age bracket see themselves as stuck between their parents and their ‘ovm children. in a manner that is not very encouraging, They have lived ther intial yeas according to the advice of thei parents, and now fel itis their duty to take care oftheir ‘parents, something they do reluctantly, Tis the bargain, they fe! cheated, since even as their parents had the vertainty of ol age ‘care, they are uncertain about theis own children. Their ives are now dictated by the needs, desires and dreams oftheir children, which has left them with very litle time to live for themselves ‘This teuth especially manifests itselfin southern Indis, where very lite is expected from kids. “We were always etpet _gne tp with the some expectation” “This generation is openly envious of the youth’ today forthe sheer freedom from responsibilities and societal expectations that they enjoy. Fas meri shad hs, moasklol se 4-5 din ka honeymoon tha. Mt-Abv mein. Akal to Tog, madi bar ehuttleke Mauritie Singapore ott jogah shim joate hast fo tohe car of our parents and we weil. ut our children den’ ‘The Pleasure Of Belng Young: Younger men in the 18-24 year age bracket however, sem to be enjoying the beat ofall worlds, With parents ofering financial security they can afford tobe younger fr longer, delaying the need tobe responsible and even getting rearred later than ever before. “The financial security forded by Uhl parent allows them toindalge themselves, rather than worry aboat saving for tomorrow. However, this independence does nt ezme fre of cost and in return for financial ceariy they allow their pares to participate in ky fe ‘decisions, ike marcnge. ‘Arranged marriages bence contin tobe in vogue, but with some hey differences. Parents today curate aslection of possible spouses forthe consideration oftheir children, rather ‘than insisting on their prefered chai as the only posible partnes. Websites suchas ‘Shaadi.com have widened the choice of possible partners significantly, but ae often used ‘more by paents than bythe youth theinselves. fy parent ove looking fe ge fr ma on Shaadi.com, they shortlist the profiles shave ton sith me hae tothe gir ven them ated east 1D, which they then ved Parents Are A Burden: Thre i palpable euctance to take care of older parents aris segrents an ages. ven as there a societal an personal expectation tat they meet the responsi, they do so unviingly, unless theres a clear and visible contribution to thet ousehold either financially orn terms of sharing the workload. oVheh both of sare wanking, my mete tales are af he Rowell esprit “hes ae willing to pay lp service to traditions ut just to avoid eetion and so long as tis temporary. “When oe rein Deb e ie the my we dress the way we tae, go cl fer din, tut for afro day” However, elders are expected to understand the burden that they impose, and not to extend the Bounds of authority, and leo to avoid imposing their elif systems on their children and family. cclen ee gota our howe in Lucknons,rstrienions nr Yuet 15 OR‘he Indian man increasingly defines himself by his possessions. “However, this materialistic definition of self-worth means that the calpast of suecess is constantly shifting and seems ever-elusive, [ince both the lis of tems necessary to be seen as successful Keeps jnereasing, as does their associated cost. ‘Possessions like home electronics are where the traditional game bf one-upmanship is being played to the hil, with bigger or more ‘expensive devices being coveted at the cost of being in debt. The “acquisition of an expensive electronic item obviates the concern of taking on a Joan, due tothe perceived image as an ‘asset ‘Money Is Everything: The attude to money is perhaps one ofthe biggest chang inthe Indian consuinér landscape ~ this eneration does not ale money akan asset but rather as ssn enables ‘accordingly the attude towards money snot one of femseration, bur of optimal ison to achieve [esires, At the samc time, mone is also one ofthe ‘biggest stressors for today's men. As expenses and Inflation mount, estimating the eomect amount of money fora better tomorrow is becoming tougher ‘and tougher. Net Destiny's chilren, Ant Proud Off: Thi generation ‘of men consider themselves completely free to carve fot itr own frre, without beng bound wo fallow [rllrodden paths due to puso oppor. [Py aresopremaysf-oufdent hatter pa or pirth does not limit their aspirations or dreams. iprhave a beter launchpad, Iwill get a better start But the iu _finish is aboays in may hand” ‘A Burning Need To Get ‘Somewhere’ Fast: The impact ofthis sititude has profound consequences not only on their personal lives but their professional aspirations and ambitions as well The feeling that | am only as good asthe money I make implies that ‘they also look at theit careers from the perspective of best returns. "Yeu nee ta measure hi tes time to consider the ne Loyalty is of shrinking utility to this generation, which proudly proclaims that you nced to be onlyas loval as your options permit. In smaller towns, a pacity of knowledge and opportunities means that jobs are seen 4s limiting in the growth prospects that they provide. much you ure making -ifgroath is slow. ou ean move dhe +2 steps with «job, but ou exit jumpy ahead tke you can in business” Unsurprisingly, a recent study found that India has the highest attrition rate among major economies. Even Thelr Role Models Have Feet Of Clay: This trend is exacerbated by alack of ole models, especially for the younger generation. cons of professionalism ‘and institution builders are scen as yesteays heroes, and, the reach of global icons is limited to a small set of urban, affluent Indians. Role models tend to come from within ‘the community or area, and many of these role models have been successful by being ‘practiea!'in their approach to business ‘Hamare yahuan relte hin, sheher mein sabse pale BMY unhone kari thiem “I Sevens Seas The relationship between the husband and the wife has inreasingy become a relationship of equals, with both partners sharing and supporting the fami "The more materialistic nature of modern Indian society is also being manifested mong women, andthe pressure of providing forthe want ofthe family ic also Children oot to he sen as being et ist by the man ofthe ase ‘he moet precious gi bt ‘The husband today increasingly expected to contribute time towardsthe welfare ineresingy pares sf the household beyond ust earning money a fact which he is awe of bt now tat his gi sents, His contention is that sine he rings home the income, he needs to be comes with an freed othe oer aspects of aking car f the household but hes being showy cnr date. There fru surely forced to ikea more active ee inhonsehld ais well ivan increasing ‘Thetis an increasing presure on men to deliver on their oes asthe provider sswareess that , ‘ « their soe thee children life once they ow spand ‘The Relationship With His Wife Is Or Shifting Sands: omentemponerment has become independent perhaps had the most ble impact.n the relationship between the husbandand maybe Himited hence ‘he wife and the contours of these relationships have changed drastically ‘ey are aso preparing "Th roleoftheman asthe head ofthe household tay is more ike a therseles financially fora comstiational monarchy mher than an absolute one, with the extent of omer Independent existence. being regtited constantly. The role ofthe head ofthe bouscholl has exore ‘pominal athe than re “There isa rising ewarenes tat children il ve “Earle my father would speak ond mom would ister. Nowodays, [hae to ‘thro ives, where der rle may be mite: omcinae ng fe nat jut tell her something” 2a a ole klar sah Ks ke “The woman has become fr more assertive than ever efre, and the biggest ad uski mars, Wie maine ako mentally change is visible in noth India, where womes have come ito their owa and are thug ha lon hat” jotta hy of showcasing the extent of empowerment feta vrine-afe all lan aliscoibeducabond con handle egemantan Children s Te Bound: They see b usb ‘ther duty as being mld to providing tbe bat ‘In southern nda, he situa of respect end to be maintained possible sar for here hrough the ight ¥ nat responsi t ake ere of education, bat increasingly expect children to m shoulder the burden of expensive post-grauation grees. Increasing Proference For Working Wives: CConstartl playing dal eles at work and homes “There is an increasing expectation that ein Jeadingofrsation among men: Teaching our dep shoalde the rising uncial burden of daughter iy responsibility a hone, but tjust gts —-_eention: “Tasker my wont take en educational too much atthe end ofa working doy” lean for his MBA, that aye lar the responsibility” Perhaps in ecgnition ofthis ely theres high lovelofexpresed preferencefora working hovsew'le Sound Education Seen At Future insulation From ‘who then also shares the burden of providing forthe tes The right education also abso them family ab shoud hog hop boten of fate responsibilities: Tenrure my deur bos akan : uh ss working and has che right qualifations, tomorrre she shld not be dependent om if something gos wrong (Orin other ass the husbands are seen encouragh ‘bir wives to continue euaton post mariage: ‘The Indian parenting paradigm bas change, from : boss living for chidzen to living for themselves while proving the right start tos. of£ Friendship Is The Last Bastion Of Tadtonal Masculine Frend rein the one area sthere men can tlhe men, and that aspect | esti to beer important hema | There isn taboo subjects when among ‘| fiends: “Vor tall abt rls el thin ich you cam talk about ith enyeone dramatic changes in the way welook atour For men, friends area reafirmation of, lose relationships, there is an even more traditional norms of masculinity, which is dramatic shift im the extended family phase. being challenged at home and office: “e's ‘The extended family is seen as weleome as Hikeat home, and at work we have to be more jtween work and home, the man ofteday long as they arein ine or ahead financially, corned, with friends yom con be lie you are.” feel stifled. At work be is constantly trying _and hence ean provide the right role models ‘to make an impression that will help him get fortheir own family, else the relationship ie Mlerarchy Of Fendships: However, even this, ‘ahead in life and therefore meet his ambitious restricted to family marriages and events. _area has not been without change, because cial targets A housewife in Jodhpur proudly said: 7 friendships today are more about convenience _Athome he is required to play dual roles encomraged my husband to move out ofthe than about bonding, but even asthe quantity schich he realy docsn't connector relate with. joint family aince they are not as educated as of fiendships have expanded dramatically He feclshis'masculinity’is being supressed ee areand hence my child dacen get the right thanks to WhatsApp andthe like, the quality 1yy fulfilling what he believes are traditionally ercirunment™ of friendships has deteriorated to a significant woman’ roles. Rising entertainment options have further extent, and often an hierarchy of friendships is friends inthis situation are hisescape obviated the need forthe traditional Indian emerges, signalled by the way friends are ‘mechanism, with whom he feelshe doesn't _ extended family and increasingly the practise wished on birthdays ‘need to put up any pretences. They are. cof dropping over unannounced has practically Close friends Call and meet on birthdays fiends of convenience but hold critical disappeared, Friends ~Call on birthdays place in his ite Fiiendshave taken upthis space in hislife, General friends - SMS ‘which the extended family has vacated, Casual acquaintances ~ Facebook message ‘Tenwous Relations: Even as these are sees TY CONCLUSION he str of he modern adn ma that emerge rom th tu is fone one even by his uring embiton to soceea, and the pum ‘ot material wealth And he swing to scr quite Br to get thee, ncn sre of values. He retutarty Cres fo Ns ares and doesnot expect Ns Wi 0 ‘Setter nm in oid.age He grudgingly aceats nomen’ deste tobe tested 3 caus But ews the while equation Unf Ih fact hfe he canbe on Ms wn ory {imongst nen. We wane t loge ood, bu ony Bochure appearance ese Says an as am enabee mowing stead ines, on te whole ote ety Dire