Overcompensating and False Dominants

Another popular approach that many men use is overcompensation. This is often depicted as the
"player lifestyle" encouraging men to constantly "be alpha," without fully understanding what
that truly means. The advice can come in various forms, but it generally boils down to this: focus
excessively on your own desires and impose them onto others, without considering their feelings.
Exaggerate your dominance and boast about your strength.

Go out of your way to make others feel inferior in order to make yourself appear superior. I used
to refer to these individuals as "fake alphas," but in reality, they are just men who are
overcompensating by excessively displaying their dominance. Fake alphas are often serial
players, obsessively seeking casual sexual encounters and not only treating the women they sleep
with poorly, but also disrespecting them. This behavior is deceptive.

At first glance, a "fake alpha" may seem like a non-needy and less invested individual. However,
if you look closely, it becomes evident that they are no different from anyone else. The fake
alphas create an image of not caring, which may appear uninvolved to those around them.

But the irony is that the fake alpha actually does care, only they constantly proclaim that they
don't. It's similar to someone saying, "I don't mind if she doesn't call me back." Then, the next
day, when she doesn't call, he insults her, calls her names, and claims that she was never worth
his time anyway.

But hey, he doesn't care, right? The motivation behind the fake alpha persona is the same as that
of the overly nice guy: seeking attention and affection from those around them. One person does
it by being kind, while the other does it by being imposing and rude. One attempts to elicit love,
while the other tries to elicit fear. Both are needy. Both personas depend equally on validation
from women and the people around them – the nice guy relies on validation from his girlfriend
or wife, while the fake alpha seeks validation from the number of women he can sleep with or
hook up with. Both stem from deep-seated insecurity.

That's why it is not uncommon to see men swing from one extreme to another, transitioning from
being a submissive nice guy to an overcompensating jerk. Despite superficial differences, they
are not so dissimilar. Let's consider another example. Roy was a nice guy throughout his time in
college. He was a nerdy science enthusiast, but he was adored by all the girls he hung out with.

Unfortunately, Roy also adored these girls. However, whenever he mustered the courage to
express his feelings, they always told him they only saw him as a friend. Meanwhile, Roy would
sit there listening to his female friends complain about their terrible and insensitive boyfriends.

All Roy could think was, "But I care about you, I'm sensitive, and I'm right in front of you. Why
can't you see that?" Needless to say, his female friends never developed romantic feelings for
him. Eventually, at the age of 25, Roy entered his first relationship with a depressive and slightly
overweight graduate student who worked with him in the lab.

Despite her obvious flaws, he was infatuated with her. However, his girlfriend's emotional
instability eventually led to the downfall of their relationship, as she left him for another man
after a tumultuous year. Anger consumed Roy. He was tired of being taken advantage of. He was
tired of being ignored and hurt.

Throughout his life, women had never shown sexual interest in him, and the one who finally did
was not satisfied. Roy decided he had reached his limit – it was time to prioritize himself. He
started reading books on how to become a player and seduce women. These books encouraged
Roy to tease girls, put them in their place, and act cocky and arrogant around the