Learning journal 1

A2151267

Chen Minhui

As I defined my identity as a Chinese female university student, the group I belong t

o is a color race as I’m an Asian, I think I’m from the middle class in China, my gender is wo
man, also I’m under a great health circumstance. I learned that people from many different gr
oups are different from me. For example, I know a person whose identity is gay and male in
China. His group identity is different from mine in many ways, but I mainly focus on his sexu
ality identity. My sexuality identity is heterosexual, which is considered to be the mainstream
of sexuality in China. So, we are different in what kind of choice we have when we face starti
ng a relationship or getting ready for our marriage, even when we consider the possibility of a
child and living a lifestyle. We were also different in how we could date our partners, and wh
at kind of responsibility we had in the relationship or the family. Chinese education, especiall
y the moral education given by the government didn’t teach us about the other possibilities of
sexuality, heterosexuality is normal and common sense in society. One of my friends found o
ut he was gay when he was in junior school, he told this to some other classmates, and it led t
o discrimination and unfriendly behavior at that time. Society taught us to model of man and
woman is the correct answer, if not there must be some mental illness with it. Even in some li
terature, music, films, and other sexuality still be seen as forbidden, and may banned by the g
overnment. So I think the implicit message behind this socialization is with the mainstream as
heterosexual, people can build families and have kids, and it will be easier for the governmen
t to govern the society and control the relationship between people through socialization effec
ts. If I was told that everyone is the same, this implicit message of hiding other options of sex
uality matches the explicit message. When I reflected on my experience of interacting with th
is friend, as when I was also in junior school, I did feel uncomfortable and weird when I talke
d with this friend, the differences made me unconsciously stay away from him and not fully u
nderstand or respect him as well. However, when I get more familiar with those concepts and
especially when I have more chance to learn those in university, I’m able to accept the differe
nces. But still, I might ask questions like won’t your parents urge you to get married or how a
bout your marriage if you can’t get married in China. I think those questions I had are highly
affected by the socialization that I have been living through in my last 18 years.