8.

Dating Is a Dance of Dominance & This Is How to Dance

We have seen women seek men who are “more than them”.

More in as many areas as possible, of course.

But power and dominance are some of the most crucial aspects.

This lesson will focus on how leadership, (social) power and

dominance affect the dynamics of dating and seduction.

Definitions:

Leadership is the ensemble of ability and attitudes required to take

charge and lead;
Power is the amount of influence one can exert on the environment;
Social power is the influence and pressure one can exert on the
people around and, particularly, on the dating partner;
Dominance is the more direct expression of power, including the
physical realm.

Leadership & Power

Sex can be seen as the final act of submission.

When she agrees to sex, she accepts his leadership and recognizes
him as the most dominant party of the relationship.

There are exceptions and there are cases in which women do most of
the work. And relationships with women in charge even last longer.
However, as a general rule, women are passive and want the man to
take charge.
That’s why albeit sex can happen without his leadership, good proper
seduction always requires male leadership.
In most cases, if the man doesn’t lead, the two stay put and the
seduction goes nowhere.

Men Must Make Her Want to Follow His Lead

General principles to make her want to follow his leadership:

– Focus on being a high-value man women like: that’s 80% of her

wanting to follow
– Take her opinion into account
– Avoid making it sound like you’re a general: it’s a teamwork
– Calibrate the steps to her comfort level
– “Sell” your ideas well: present the benefits
– Add “because” to your requests (ie.: let’s go sit there because here
it’s too noisy”)
– In make or break situations, simply assume she will follow your lead

Never Make It A Battle of Wills

Do you remember the lesson on frames?
He must avoid making it a battle of will and he should make it as
natural as possible.

In brief: she must want to follow his lead.

Look at this example from Once Upon a Time in America:

https://youtu.be/lf3Ph7f5Mq8

This is an example of “battle of wills”.

Sitting next to her was the better move. The mistake is focusing on the
“war of leadership” instead of what moves the interaction forward.
How could he have done better?
He could have sit next to her -because that’s better for seduction- and
neutralize her leading move by saying “thank you for making space for
me”.
With that sentence, he would have framed the interaction as her doing
work for him. Then he could have retaken the leadership going
forward.

Leadership is crucial, but souring relationships to enforce your

leadership is the wrong way to go about it.

Tasking and Leadership

Remember tasking?

Tasking is a strong indicator of where the power lies in a relationship.

Those who assign tasks, tend to be the leaders.

A woman who executes his tasks communicates she is accepting

his leadership.

And if she keeps accepting his leadership as the relationship

progresses, chances are she will accept him as a lover as well.

If you have seen the movie Scarface, Elvira was constantly rejecting
and pushing back on Tony.
And it’s in this scene we know Elvira is now finally open to being
seduced by Tony:

https://youtu.be/LwqOdUSIZxY

She prepares him a drink when he asks. And she sits next to him
when he asks.
Both are examples of her following his lead and accepting his
leadership.
Refusals of Leadership
If she refuses his leadership, he has little chances of seducing her.

That’s why men must assess the likelihood of her following his
leadership before actually leading her, tasking her and telling her what
to do.

Read an example here in the forums.

Leadership Showdowns and Escalation to Sex

Remember the lesson on showdowns?

Showdowns are interpersonal escalations that resemble “power thugs

of war”.
How the thug of war develops and ends will have outsized influence
over the rest of the relationship.

Well, there are showdowns in seduction as well.

Look at this example from Sex And the City and try to guess what’s
the crucial showdown moment:

https://youtu.be/LFmbNP-nB84

If Harry had obeyed Charlotte’s request to “open the window” the

seduction would have likely stopped, going from hot and heavy to
slimy and embarrassing.
He would have communicated she is the leader and her task mattered
more than his sexual drives. That would have been a huge turn off for
her.
Unwavering confidence and dominance can make all the difference
between a successful seduction and an awkward mating attempt
ending with a sexual harassment (or assault) charge.

Female Approaches to Leadership

Some women will rarely lead and are very passive in dating.

These women make it easier for men.

They are less likely to screen for very dominant men, but also have a
much easier time finding a boyfriend.

Some other more dominant women try to continuously task men and
act catty and rebellious to his leadership.
These women are more likely to end up with very dominant men or,
sometimes, they have to content themselves with very submissive
men because they have difficulties finding a dominant enough man.
It’s harder for these women to find a boyfriend.

There are also a few awkward women who screw up their dating with
obvious and blatant attempts to lead and make him follow.
Often they are highly dramatic, histrionic, BPD or, sometimes, just
socially clueless women.

This is one such example:

She left, point blank, in an attempt to make me follow her.
This is a losing strategy for women because it screens in low-quality
men, who will run after her, and screens out high-quality men, who will
drop her.
It’s the opposite of what a good dating strategy should do.
The Wrong Way Of Commanding Her
Of course, there are countless ways of misusing leadership and
dominance.

Ordering her around disrespectfully is not what high-quality men do

and more like what insecure ones do.

This scene from “The Nights of Cabiria” is a good example of bad

dominance and leadership:

https://youtu.be/bBEli-YYl-E

It’s too curt, too aggressive, too disrespectful and too haughty.
That man is communicating he is unhappy with himself and with his
life. Not the kind of person a high quality, self-respecting woman
would follow.

Social Dominance
Remember module 1 with all the signs fo social dominance?

Now, look at this example from Beautiful Girls.

What do you think?

https://youtu.be/E8LYvflSTAE

He looks down, a typical submissive sign and exactly

what women should to in reaction to a dominant man.

In that scene, she is the dominant one.

And he would have no chances in seducing her unless she made it
happen (which is not impossible but unlikely).
Power Escalations: When to Push for Showdowns &
When to Stop
Do you remember the lesson on escalations?

We learned that caving in or winning after a long drawn out escalation

carries (much) more weight.

And it’s even truer in dating: if he loses the power escalation, he’s
often toast.

Men who master dating also get good at knowing when to push
because they are likely to win and when to avoid the escalation by
taking the early but small loss.

When they take the small early loss they stay in the game and can
come back stronger later.

However, men should also be wary of amassing a number of small

losses because they tally over time and doom him.
Eventually, he must take a risk and get in the leadership seat.

Here is an example of a bad escalation (and a few ideas on how to

improve on it):

https://youtu.be/OHNg4QlyLcI

I’d like to remind you again here that after you win after a long drawn
out escalation you must rebuild goodwill!

Why?

Because people don’t like being dominated and vanquished.

And if he allows the power struggle to poison the budding relationship,
it will destroy the relationship.

Social Power Showdowns

Since social power is more difficult to spot, sometimes the showdown
moment can happen in seemingly innocuous exchanges.

Imagine this dialogue:

Her: You’re so into yourself (with a haughty look, turning away as if to

refuse him)
(Note: asking her “why” or defending here would have meant putting her in
the judge power position)
Him: Me? I’m so into myself? (turns to her, gets closer to her to her face,
raises his voice but smiling: it’s a friendly counterattack) Look at you, with
the slim fit biker leather jacket, (reaches out to her scarf) the Italian scarf,
the coiffed hair (touches her hair). Yeah, nice try (pats her head, a “babying
power move”)
Her: (lowers her eyes, smiles, she’s happy of the compliments… And for
being socially out-powered)

This is similar to an exchange happened to me some time ago, and

little later we went back to my place.
I cannot re-run the interaction to test it, but I’m fairly confident this was
the biggest turning point on the way to bed.

In the power showdown lesson, we said you must rebuild goodwill

right after.
But here there is no need to rebuild because my re-assertion comes
as a consequence of her trying to jokingly push my boundaries.
Plus I also compliment her as I push it back on her.
Social Pressure
As we have seen in Module 1, social pressure is an indicator of social
dominance.
Usually, the person who puts social pressure on others is the most
dominant one. And the one who acts -or cracks- under social pressure
is the subordinate one.

In short: it’s dominant individuals who wield social pressure.

And a man who puts a woman under pressure communicates he is

socially in charge.

And a man who puts a woman under pressure communicates he is

socially in charge.

Look at this scene from the movie The Saint:

https://youtu.be/Nj9FGXdci7Y

His ability to raise and release tension at will communicates “I’m in

charge here”.

Intellectual Dominance
Dominance is expressed in many forms.

And albeit intellectual dominance is not what most link to the word
“dominance”, it’s actually a crucial aspect of overall dominance.

After all, just think about it, would you be happy to follow someone you
consider to be a dumbass?
In less crude words, people are not comfortable following anyone
whom they feel is less intelligent and less experienced than they are.

We already saw that intelligence is one of the sought-after traits in the

sexual market place, especially for long term dating.
It’s especially important for intelligent people and it’s especially
important when there is an “intelligence gap”. Such as, intelligent
people are particularly uncomfortable dating less intelligent
individuals.

Do you remember the first lesson, that people can barter different
currencies?
And intelligence, just like any other trait, can be bartered as well.

When I started dating my very first girlfriend I was far less socially
attuned, less cool and much less sexually experienced.
The only thing I had was that I sounded somewhat smart and
intellectually dominant (more on it later).
She had big boobs, great body and was almost a head taller than I
was (which wasn’t that tall anyway, just that I’m very short :).
In that case, the bargaining came out in the open when she said, quite
literally, that she felt OK in our relationship because, albeit she felt
intellectually inferior, she felt “sexually superior” (things would be
different today).

But intellectual dominance is not just “knowing more” or having more

IQ points, but it’s also the ability to debate, defend your opinion, show
the flaws in her opinion, and change her mind.

Intellectual Dominance: My Power Move

My English is far from great, but it’s enough to put me in the top 1% of
non-native speakers.
And since I mostly communicate in English while living outside of
English speaking countries, that allows me to take an intellectually
dominant position over the women I speak to.

How do I take full advantage of that?

I officialize with one simple question.
Here it is:

Me: Do you want me to correct your English?

With one simple question, I position myself as the linguistic authority,

which by itself is an important part of overall intellectual authority.

Also, the way that women reply to that question tells me a lot about
their personalities and psychological makeup (I mention it in this forum
entry).

Physical Dominance
Physical dominance is a poorly discussed and highly misunderstood
topic.
This section will clarify how physical dominance fits into seduction and
power dynamics.

Consensual Resistance To Sex & Dominance

“Consensual resistance to sex” refers to the woman resisting to sex
while also enjoying the process and, in spite of the resistance, being
willing, or at least open, to sleep with him.

Albeit it might sound like a misnomer, consensual resistance to sex is

actually relatively common.
Some typical resistances entail turning her head away on a kiss,
refusing to move to a horizontal position, or battling over each single
piece of clothing before she finally relents.

Some authors say that she resists sex looking for proofs of stamina
and physical strength, but that always sounded to me like one of those
typical “made up evolutionary narratives” that sounds good but
actually makes no sense.
I don’t think it makes much sense because almost anyone who can
move can also go for such low-intensity resistance games.

The “testing concept” per se is not wrong, though. But instead of being
physical, in opinion it’s more about will, resolve, experience
and emotional stability.
If you remember in the traits that women seek the most in a mate,
emotional stability features quite high.
Men who feel near the cookie but get denied for a while and have little
experience and have little emotional control can fly off the handle.
Women fear these type of men, and for good reasons.
Experienced and emotionally stable man won’t get angry and will keep
a good mood throughout. The most experienced and emotionally
stable men will even manage to make it a good experience and part of
the sexual foreplay.

That’s why a man who handles resistances well often does not
just get sex, but takes a bit step towards her heart as well.

Finally, resistance to sex is also an indicator of how much he likes her.

Some men might not be willing to go through a lot of troubles for a
woman they don’t really like.
More than once I cut our time short at my place because I didn’t think
out interaction was worth that much time and I would have rather done
something else.

Sometimes I tell the girl that if she isn’t willing to have sex with me she
didn’t like me enough and hence it made no sense to keep hanging
out together.
That’s a sort of “take it or leave it” last call, the equivalent of saying
“either we do it, or you should probably go”.
It might sound mean, but I disagree: it’s actually just saving both of our
time.

Physical Boldness & Attraction

Physical assertiveness, if well executed, is highly attractive to women.

I must repeat this again: please note that physical boldness alone can
be scary and abusive if it’s not part of an overall environment of safety
and good vibes.

Look at this conversation below, and keep in mind her English was
very weak so her “attack” actually refers to a more aggressive than
average physical escalation to sex:

This is a woman I met once and had sex with after a rather lengthy
consensual resistance.
Notice how chase-y she gets after our encounter.
Her attraction was not because we hit it off so well -we could barely
speak without Google translate-.
There wasn’t a strong physical attraction prior to the sex encounter:
she was taller and more than once commented on it.
Her attraction was the consequence of bold, dominant and well-
executed escalation to sex.

A well-executed dominant escalation to sex requires a good

understanding of when it’s getting too much for her and when instead
it’s safe to push.

When a man gets good at reading the social and emotional signals, he
can allow himself to push hard and still keep an overall pleasant -and
even caring- atmosphere.

And this is why emotional intelligence and a good grasp of social

dynamics translates well into all area of people interactions, including
dating and seduction.

Expressions of Male Physical Dominance

These are some advanced moves that men can use during escalation:

– Grab her neck from behind

– Grab her neck from the front (more advanced, avoid most of the
times)
– Hold her face if she refuses to kiss you until you can give at least a
pecker (or get some skin contact in order to avoid the dynamic where
she’s the leader who chooses what to hand out)
– Jokingly push her towards the bed
– Jokingly drag her towards the bed
– Pick her up to carry her to the bed
– Increase physical intensity to overcome resistance and undo a
button
– On the bed, pin her hands above her head while you kiss her bosom
or remove an item of clothing (more advanced)
– Bite her beck

Men should be at a good level of emotional intelligence before safely

engaging in them.

Remember that all expressions of physical dominance must

happen in an overall atmosphere of safety.
She must know and feel that it’s safe.

If you haven’t developed your social acuity yet, don’t do it.

As I escalate, this is what I often do to make sure she knows it’s all
good:

1. Take breaks in between bouts of escalation

2. Take a break when I see it’s getting too uncomfortable for her
(that’s why EI is so important)
3.Stop for a second and with serious tone say “hey, I want you to
know that you are safe here”. Pause, let it sink in. Sometimes I insist
on that point and tell her “this is important, did you get it?” until she
acknowledges
4. Switch from hard escalation to more cuddly-and caring (ie.: kiss on
the forehead, hug, light make out)
5. Tell her “I like you”

Sometimes women want to do it but are still battling some mental

blocks and need the man to take charge.
So I might tell her:

I am going to pin your hands down now and remove your panties so that it’s
not your fault

If you notice she’s not yet ready, stop and kiss her thighs and outer
vagina instead of forcing the removal of her clothes.
If she says she wants to leave, I always say that she can leave at any
time but I really want her to stay because I like her.
If she really wants to leave, needless to say, you let her go and even
help her back wherever she needs to go.

When Women Take Physical Charge

It’s rarer, but women sometimes also engage in more purely physical
strength games.

She might for examples playfully wrestle him away.

Or, it might also happen, that the woman jokingly takes physical
charge of the escalation.
She might move him away from being on top and get herself on top,
for example.

Some less experienced men think that’s good and she is leading
herself to sex.
But that’s rarely the case.
Women mostly lead to sex with men who played coy all along, but
rarely with men who go from leading to lead.

Usually, men should not allow her to prove herself stronger or more
strong-willed than he is.

So while he must be careful not to make it seem like he is taking it too

seriously, he should always avoid letting her physically dominate him.

Example of Dominance Battle: The Fight Simulation

If the man takes her up on the challenge sometimes the battle can end
up mimicking a fight.

This scene between James Bond and Pussy Galore is basically a light
fight simulation, with the prize being her:
https://youtu.be/CuAz6DXUopw

I personally don’t like the dynamics of fight simulation and I would go

as far as discouraging men from engaging in them.

I personally don’t like the dynamics of fight simulation and I would go

as far as discouraging men from engaging in them.

To begin with, it can be difficult for most men to recognize real

resistance from a simulated fight. And that can end up tragically.
Second, the fight simulation begins as a relationship of equals -
otherwise she wouldn’t simulate the fight- and sets a bad frame of
combativeness (bad).
Third, the relationship that might ensue will be more based on
dominance than on anything else, and that makes for a more tenuous
bond.

I prefer seductions with a clearer dynamic of the man in charge from

the beginning.
And I prefer them to have the unstated frame that this is a game and
the two are together in it, moving together towards a union of bodies
and souls.
Sure, there might be the resistance games, but that’s part of the
sexual dance.

When Women Prod For His Dominance

Sometimes women will tease him to dominate her.

The tease is a message that their refusal is only a facade and that the
man should really take charge, barrel through and dominate her.

If the man acts on those signals it often ends in lots of moaning and
requests of fucking her hard.
Here is a good example from Five Easy Pieces:

https://youtu.be/MlXhunwwHzA

She is he teasing him by walking away -thus forcing him to follow-,

then smiling at his outburst and acting coquette.
She is putting on perfume, whose main reason for existence is
attracting mates, while confronting him with a power gaze.
Also her words, “I’d like you to leave so I can take a bath” are hinting
at the sexual.

But note that the power here often rests with her. Or, at least, she
feels in power because she orchestrated the whole thing and he only
acted on her cues.

For a man to gain power after the sex, he should act distant, as if he
didn’t care, and let her come to him and express more interest and
emotional investment. Otherwise, it might remain with him chasing for
sex and her deciding when to give it to him and how to provoke him.

Non-Physical Dominance
Albeit it sounds like a misnomer, physical dominance is also conveyed
without any touch at all.

The way you talk, walk, deal with the people around, how you expect
her to follow you and, of course, the way you look at her.

This picture is not the greatest gaze example in itself as I was drunk
by then.As a matter of fact, it’s terrible.
But compared to a company party where everyone tried to look
friendly and silly, flashing toothy smiles and big grins, it stood out.

And notice her reaction:

“what a sight”… Do you think she enjoyed the wolf/sheep dynamic?

There is a certain overlap here with the “psychopath stare”.

Byrch says that the “psychopath stare” is scary with strangers and
outside of seduction but, when she is with her lover and in seductive
environments, many women find it extremely arousing.
You can also check out “do psychopaths get laid more?”.

And of course you remember the example from Goodfellas we saw in

module 1:

https://youtu.be/pnyjX3jF4OU
 Sexual Dominance
Dominance leads to bed, but can also continue in bed.

The resistance to sex is also part of sexual dominance, which can also
then prolong to the sex itself.

Moving her around, changing positions at will and showing an

“animalistic” side when having sex are also signs of dominance which
can make many women do-eyed.

Just one rule: if you must be dominant, do it with full conviction.

Half-assing it is sure to backfire:

https://youtu.be/wOSYB8HzdOY

Sexually Objectifying Women

Most women will vehemently deny this of course.

But it’s likely that at least some of those same women do enjoy being
treated as sexual objects… At the right time and by the right
man (both heavily underlined).

Being overcome by a strong sexual urge, turning her around and

bending her over a piece of furniture and entering her as soon as she
enters your place, for example, can be extremely arousing for her.
Waking up at night and start fucking her can also be extremely
arousing.

It’s also not unlikely that women will become much more mellow and
submissive after you dominantly penetrate them in one of the above
ways early in the relationship.
This is an example of “attacking” her with raw sexual aggression as
soon as we walked in:
However, I want to make a note here: most men get all heady and
proud when they have a similar effect on women.
It’s normal to feel good about getting laid and to have a positive effect
on others but, when brought to an extreme, it’s disempowering
because you are relinquishing control of your moods and state of
minds on other people’s opinions of you, which is the definition of
(emotionally) needy.

I’m not saying you should cut yourself off from any source of external
validation. You can and maybe should enjoy the effects of your skills,
but I usually invite readers of ThePowerMoves.com to move beyond
external gratifications of your ego.

Finally, emotions are fleeting.

And it’s rarely the case that after a crazy adventure overcome by love
women will come back for more.
Sometimes the opposite is true: some women might feel slutty and
never want to see you again (more on it later).

Case in point: this same lady who “felt unreal” came back to Berlin…
And we didn’t even meet.

This might be the right time to introduce this topic:

Dominance And Pathology: A Warning

Dominance is dominance.
Per se, it’s not good or bad.

It can be used for good, and even to make the best interest of both
partners and of our mates.
But it can be used for selfish purposes as well.

Some individuals who seek dominance and power over others can be
pathological.
As a matter of fact, most pathological relationships with dark triad
individuals, often men, entail their search for power, dominance and
control over their partners.

Sociopaths and psychopaths seek dominance for the feeling of power

they want to feel over others.
Some sociopaths and psychopaths only want relationships where they
completely control their partners, in all aspects. Many psychopaths
feel at the most powerful when they can also ruin and harm their
partners. So their control often isn’t just control for control’s sake and
not even control for selfish reasons. It can become sadistic control to
inflict gratuitous harm.
Yes, sadly we live in a world where evil exists. Luckily, simply knowing
about it lowers the chances you will be a victim of evil.

If you see these tendencies in yourself, it’s good if you stop for a
second to think about it, and possibly reassess. You can’t change
psychopathy probably, but you do can become less of a narcissist.

If you see these tendencies in your partner, you might be better off
cutting contact.

Is Learning Dating Power Dynamics Antisocial?

Sandra Brown, author of “Women Who Love Psychopaths” says that
any man looking into seduction advice is by its very nature high in
psychopathy traits.
I don’t fully disagree, actually, and there is plenty of people -and even
coaches- who are high in dark triad traits (see Mystery from “Mystery
Method”, a full-blown narcissist).
But I also disagree in large part.
Many are here, and many are reading this exact same ebook,
because they are driven men and women, looking to do more, be
more, and maximize their potential.
And that’s not psychopathic.
The opposite is true, actually. While most psychopaths don’t have
enough patience to stick with complex information to learn and grow,
most high quality men and women do have that patience.
And the more empathic high quality men and women learn power
dynamics, the better off we will be as a society.

Sex As Control Tool

Some women and some men seek to provide great sex as a tool for
relationship power and to “lock down” higher quality partners.

It can be conscious, or unconscious to keep our partners close to us.

Contrary to what some people think, sex as a control tool works better
from men to women than from women to men.
This is because male orgasm is “easy”, while female one, as we’ve
seen, is more discriminatory.

And when a man and a woman hit it off very well in bed, or when a
woman is having orgasms, multiple orgasms or deeper orgasms for
the first time, she can get deeply hooked to a man.

In this example, sex gave me huge leverage on this early relationship:

In the short run sex is more effective in granting leverage and power.
It also boosts his status in her eyes, heightening her feelings of love
and admiration.

But it’s not possible to keep a woman who seeks a relationship without
a relationship just by providing great sex.
In the long run, more is required.
Eventually, her needs for the more typical aspects of a relationship,
such as support, provisioning, faithfulness and “officiality”, start
becoming more and more powerful -and righteously so-.

This is especially true for high quality women who more easily get
men and investment.
They have more dating power, and they more powerfully demand for
what they believe should get.
Case in point: that relationship above quickly crashed and burned
when I turned out to be a lousy boyfriend.

In sum: men who want to be the relationship leaders will gain much by
getting good at sex, but they also need to provide more.

Note On S&M
S&M is what most people think of when talking about sexual
dominance.

But that’s a totally different topic of what we have been discussing so

far.

The type of dominance we are discussing here comes from inherent

qualities and traits and not from the contract that S&M is (ie: you
dominate me because I enjoy it).

Unless they’re into S&M, men who seek a leadership role in their
relationship shouldn’t search it within the surrogate of S&M.

When non-dominant men engage in S&M, women sometimes

consider it a crutch for a lack of personal dominance and as an outlet
for personal frustrations.
And they lose some respect.
As a pharmacist Tinder date who engaged in S&M sex with the clinic’s
doctor once told me, he was “overcompensating”.

Romantic Leadership
Not all dominance is pre-sexual or sexual in nature.
Walking on a beautiful bridge, stopping her to admire the view and
then passionately kissing her like there was no tomorrow is also a
powerful sign of dominance.

Many women remember the first kiss more than the first sexual
encounter.
A well-executed “dominantly romantic move” is sure to make her
swoon and leave an everlasting memory.

Provider Dominance
High level of providing is also an aspect of dominance.

As we saw earlier, some authors mistake “providing” for less sexual,

less dominant men who exchange (limited) resources for sex and the
opportunity of making children with her.

This is a wrong approach because they focus on the average man

instead of looking at the whole spectrum of power dynamics and
resources.

So let’s look at the whole spectrum and let’s take the two extremes to
see the difference:

Low-status provider: he breaks his back on low paying jobs to make

her happy and cater to her every whim while he depletes his already
meager resources. Sometimes he gets into debt but pretends “it’s all
OK” because he fears he will leave her if he doesn’t give her whatever
she wants.

Dominant provider: he swats her hand away when she chips in 10

dollars for the tip on a 450 bill while saying with a smile “oh don’t be
silly, save those to buy your mama a little present” (or devilishly more
sexually dominant: “to buy your boyfriend a trinket“).
Then he drives her home on a Ferrari.
At home the music starts automatically as they walk in. He prepares
two cocktails with top shelf liquors and then proceeds to fuck her.

That, my friends, is the difference between a “normal” provider and a

high SMV dominant provider.

Parental-Figure Dominance
Dominance can also be conveyed with a parental, guiding figure that
provides a feeling of protection and safety.

The typical example is an older man towards a younger woman.

And the stereotype here is that she has “daddy issues”. Well, the
stereotype is not wrong: many women with father issues look for an
older man.

But it would be a mistake to think that it’s just women with “father’s
issue” who fall for it.
Many women, and many men as well, are prone to be hooked by a
parental figure.

“You Lil’ Girl” Dominance

In seduction circles there was such a concept of “girls are silly and
cute”.

Frankly, I never liked it: it just sounded like a huge crutch to

encourage men to approach women. As if to say “don’t worry, girls are
inferior to you, nothing to be afraid of”.
However, it’s also not fully wrong.

Many women do enjoy being treated like “little silly girls” in the right
place and from the right man.
James Bond in this scene has an attitude of “you lil’ girl”:

https://youtu.be/UpGFESbLMKU

That slap communicates “now go you silly lil’ girl and let the men
speak”

As usual, the caveats of “who” and “where” apply.

Where
In private, many women will enjoy.

But knowing when it’s safe to do it and knowing when it’s the
time to treat her like a perfect equal is what differentiates the fake
alpha male posturers from the really all-around high-quality men.

Don’t do it when she’s in front of people she doesn’t want to show her
submissive side to or whenever she has a reputation to uphold.
These situations include colleagues, parents, family, “feminist
girlfriends”, “clueless men” and, I would say, your guy friends too (or it
looks like you’re disrespecting her to show off to them).

In short, high-quality men treat her with love, respect and care in
public and like a little silly girl in private.

Who
Of course, the bar is placed differently depending on who is doing it.

The same woman might accept this behavior from one man but refuse
it from another.
I remember now a long time ago a (declared) feminist smiling when I
put money on the inside of her bra and told her to go buy a couple of
drinks.
But she almost hit my friend when he did it to her.

And of course, the same man might be able to do it to one woman, but
not to another.

On average, she allows it from men she’s intimate with and whom she
perceives as more dominant. But not from men who are around her
same level of dominance.

And that’s a good opportunity to test where you stand:

Use it To Test Women:

You can use “you little girl” behavior as a test to gauge where you
stand in the relationship and to better understand her psychological
makeup.
Does she accept the behavior or gets angry? Does she try to jokingly
slap you back or does she look hurt? This is all-important information
both to analyze your relationship and your girl.

Cultural Factors
Take this last paragraph with a grain of salt because it’s a
generalization and a personal speculation.

Individuals can always differ from the overall culture, and they do differ
all the times.

But still: feminism has swept through the west and the cultural
changes have been significant.
Feminism encourages women to be independent, which can lead to a
stronger initial push-back against his leadership.
Feminist-imbued women can also experience more internal struggle in
being led and dominated (ie.: “I like it, but I’m not being a good woman
if I relinquish to his leadership”).
I have personally experienced that internal struggle from Western
women several times.
That struggle can result in exaggerated push backs that could sour the
dating dance.

Many women outside the West instead expect the man to lead, to do
so early on and even encourage him to lead.
For example, I often ask women I’m dating what they’d like to do.
More than once women from eastern Europe or Russia clearly stated I
should tell them what to do because “I am the man”.

I have never heard anything similar from women in, say, Germany.

Finally, and here it’s my pure, 100% speculation, I suspect there is a

relation between Asian women being the most popular women today
and the fact that they are (or are perceived to be) as mellower and
less resistant to male leadership.

And finally, and this isn’t pure speculation, many women can improve
their dating skills by taking a hard look at how they approach power
and dominance.
Are they too resistant? Do they comply too much to requests they’re
not happy with? Could they make it easier for men they like.. ?).