Heat - May 2, 2015 UK

HEAT’S HOTTEST
HUNKS2015
RIePrbell
Tin
k
Zayn and
Perrie:
married
already?
PICTURE
EXCLUSIVE!
“They don’t
talk about
that fight”
£1.65 Spain & Canaries ¤2.90; France ¤3.40;
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INSIDE news
heat
28 APR-4 MAY 2015
Canwe
talkabout…
Bruce’s big
interview?
Last Friday, Bruce Jenner’s big interview with his old
friend Diane Sawyer aired on US TV channel ABC. Yeah, that
interview. After three weeks of teasing trailers, we saw
Bruce open up – and his hair has never looked so good.
In the run-up to the show, neither Bruce nor ABC had
confirmed what we were expecting, that he
is undergoing gender reassignment. But come
on, we knew. Turn to page 12 to see
Bruce as you’ve never
seen before…
COVER: SCOPE/CALVIN KLEIN; XPOSURE; WENN; REX; SPLASH; INFPHOTO.COM; X17ONLINE
On the cover Also this week StarStyle In every issue

6 A year after Liftgate, heat speaks 20Teetotal Kelly Osbourne 60 You can wear one dress to four 11 The Big Questions
to Beyoncé and Jay Z’s innercircle has been hitting the booze again different weddings. Yes, really 27 You Look Amaaazing!
to see how they’re really getting on 23 Has Kylie Jenner had a little 62 From Duchess Kate to Cara 29 What Were You Thinking?
12 Bruce Jenner as you’ve help with her booty-ful behind? Delevingne, we’ve got all your 30 Week In Pictures
never seen before… 25 Taylor Swift is very slim – but sassy wedding looks covered 37 Love Factually
15 Are Zayn and Perrie already you won’t believe what she eats! 40 Spotted
married? heat investigates… 34 Joey Essex hangs out with our Hotlist 51 Torso Of The Week
45 You’ve been voting in your political party leaders for the day 69 Your essential seven-day 52 Heated Debate
thousands, and now we can reveal 54 Kirstie and Phil chat bad entertainment guide to the best 95 Good Week Bad Week
heat’s 100 Hottest Hunks 2015! fashion, shoe-throwing and more in TV, film and radio 97 Crossword & Horoscopes
SO MUCH MORE THAN JUST A MAGAZINE – BREATHE IN THE GOODNESS

SUBSCRIBE CLICK LISTEN WATCH PLAY JOIN IN
/heatworld
@ heatworld
2 – 8 May 2015 WWW.HEATWORLD.COM 5

LIFTGATE
ONE YEAR ON...
THAT f
BABYp
DIVORC
rumours
A
year ago couple were hit by constant
this week, rumours. Jay was accused
dramatic of cheating on Beyoncé with
footage of Rihanna, Rita Ora and Kim
Beyoncé’s Kardashian’s friend Rachel
sister Solange Roy (they all denied the stories),
■ Just after kicking and screaming at Jay Z there was talk of a divorce and
Solange’s ninja in a lift was filmed at a Met Gala Beyoncé was pictured looking
kick, Jay’s still after-party in New York. And, in dazed and confused, leading
rubbing his face
following months, pop’s golden to some fans accusing her
6 WWW.HEATWORLD.COM 2 – 8 May 2015

Cover Story
■ Things
are still far
from perfect
between them
■ Kick
off!
ight
lans
E
sof being high. It’s safe to
say that the image of their
perfect marriage they’d spent
seven years creating had come
crashing down around them.
So, one year later, what’s
changed? Two members
of the stars’ super-
exclusive inner circle
give us an insight into the

AUG 2014
■ At the
Cover Story
VMAs, they
put on a united
front…
NOV 2014
■ …but people
said Bey looked
out of it at this
basketball match
to Jay Z. He’s taken that on a business deal. They’re joint

board and realised he needs to investors in Tidal [Jay’s new
concentrate on what’s in front music streaming service],
of him – his marriage.” they’re making a joint
He adds, “Like any album and I think
couple, they have they’re announcing
their challenges – another joint tour,
things go up and which will happen in
down, and in and 2016/2017. They’re
out. When you’re in tied into so many
■ Phillip
the public spotlight, Bloch deals and contracts,
it’s never easy to they can’t just go their
make things balance.” separate ways,” says the
However, despite Beyoncé friend. “Yes, they’re going on
talking about how much she all these public dates and she’s
loves motherhood and wants Instagramming their ‘perfect’
a big family, Phillip wonders why holidays, but the reality is, their
Blue Ivy is still an only child. “Both lives can be quite separate, and
current state of Jay Z and

Beyoncé’s marriage. “They
don’t even mention the elevator
incident any more. It isn’t spoken
about and everyone has moved
on from it,” Beyoncé’s cousin,
Shanica Knowles, insists to heat. hidden. They put their differences Jay and Beyoncé’s schedules like any other couple, if they
“Despite all the rumours over aside on all family occasions are clear this summer, so I’m argue, they’ll sometimes sleep
the past year, her and Jay have for the sake of Bey,” she says. surprised they haven’t started in separate rooms. They’re
remained united and worked Phillip Bloch, a close personal trying for another baby already. a partnership, a brand, but
on things behind closed doors.” friend of the Knowles family who’s I know she loves being a mom Beyoncé is so fiercely proud –
And Shanica, 24, tells us that styled Beyoncé many times, has and Jay loves being a father. I think she’d rather be miserable
Jay and Solange try their best to also broken rank to speak to heat. They’re very family orientated.” in private than have the world
get along for Beyoncé’s sake. “It’s “Every marriage has troubles and So, they’re trying to move on? see her life isn’t perfect.”
BEYONCE.COM; GETTYIMAGES.COM; SPLASHNEWS.COM; TMZ; XPOSUREPHOTOS.COM
hard to really know how Jay and they are no different. I think there Yes, and according to Shanica Nevertheless, Shanica, despite
Solange feel about each other, were definitely troubles, real and Phillip, they’re succeeding. our suggestion that all wasn’t as
but whatever tension there is ones, in the elevator,” he says. But, another source close to it seemed, still insists the pair are
between them is very much “That incident sent a message the family, who didn’t want to be planning to expand their family.
named, paints “They have overcome a huge
a different amount over the past year and
picture. While want to put all the rumours and
they agree that turbulence behind them,” she
the couple are tells us. “Bey is desperate for
putting the past another baby, so the family are all
behind them, they waiting for the announcement of
believe there is the second baby Carter. Blue Ivy is
AFT more to the story. definitely ready to be a big sister!”
BEFORE THE FIGHT ■ Staying away “Somewhere Maybe Beyoncé and Jay Z should
■ Jay and from each other along the way, give the Met Gala a miss this year
Solange at mum Tina’s
wedding on 12 April
heir marriage and stay home and work on that
were tight
as also become new baby? ■ ISSY SAMPSON

THE BIG
well they’re
important
to us!
1 Has had
his teeth done?
David Beckham’s one of the
fittest men on the planet. We
regularly celebrate that he’s
a proper man (apart from that
Our eyes,
our eyes!
time he wore a sarong) and that

he was untouched by the vain
hands of Hollywood. But last
week – when he was posing with
Posh for her 41st birthday – we
noticed something very odd
about Dave’s teeth. His adorably
normal gnashers are now super-
straight and whiter than Simon
Cowell’s bleached set. Is it down
to better brushing? “No way,”
says Dr Habib, from Surbiton
Dental Practice. He tells heat, al
rm
“David certainly looks like he’s No shers
had cosmetic work done on his gna
teeth. I’d say he’s either had
3
veneers or crowns put on.”
■ Nice
and comfy, What’s Joey
Essex said
Kanye
Kimye?
about Sam
Faiers’ book?
Kim
Erm, not a lot, and Sam
2
thinks it’s because Joey
Why did Kim and

won’t even bother reading
it. “The thing is with Joey,
Kanye fly Economy
Joey’s family and the
team around him, none
GOFFPHOTOS.COM; REX FEATURES; XPOSUREPHOTOS.COM
of them are going to read

the book,” Sam told heat
Radio. “I talk about the
You’d think with Kim’s share So, why? Well, the A321 good times and I speak
of the KUWTK’s megabucks Aeroflot plane (Istanbul- really highly of Joey, but
deal with E! and Kanye’s Moscow-Yerevan) doesn’t they’re just going to read
record sales, they’d be able have First Class, and the the headlines, which are
to afford First Class tickets 28 Premier reclining seats, negative. If they want
from Turkey to Armenia. So we can only presume, were to have a conversation
we couldn’t help but laugh all sold out, leaving them about it, I’ll say, ‘It’d
be nice if any of you ■ “Read?
when we saw a picture of scrunched up in standard…
them sitting in Economy. #YouSnoozeYouLose. do want to read it.’”
■ Getting
bikini ready
PICTURE
EXCLUSIVE!
Bruce Je
■ His legs
appeared to
be shaved, too
shows off
It’s Bruce. Wearing a bikini.
Yes, the reality star is free st
to live life as a woman at la
L
ast Friday, Bruce changing his appearance back
Jenner gave the in February 2014 – apparently
interview the world removing his body hair, painting
had been waiting for. his nails and wearing lip gloss.
But, as they say, a picture is Later, he undertook a rumoured
worth a thousand words… and Adam’s apple shaving. Now,
we have the first photos of following his two-hour interview
Bruce’s new body – including his with old friend Diane Sawyer, we
very recent breast implants – that get to see his full transformation.
he’s been keeping under wraps. “Like the rest of his family,
Bruce sparked speculation Bruce was holding his breath
he was undergoing a gender for Friday,” his friend tells heat.
transition when he began “He was very nervous about
the public reaction, but he
■ Last week, couldn’t wait to stop hiding.
He’s excited to start his new
ALPHA; SPLASH; X17; REX; WIREIMAGE
Bruce’s bra
Visible bra
could be seen life and doing the interview
under his top
felt like he was throwing
off the baggage he’s been
carrying for a long time.”
In the interview, Bruce tells
Diane, “I want to know how
this story ends,” adding, “It’s
gonna be an emotional roller
news
■ Adjusting
his bra straps
after his
recent breast
implants
n ner FIN AL LY
f HE R n ew bo dy
coaster, but somehow
BRUCE BACK IN THE DAY
I’m going to get through it.”
One of Bruce’s biggest
concerns has been his
family. His transition was
referenced on KUWTK, with
Khloé praising his hair and Kim
pointing out he was wearing
Spanx control underwear.
But, as heat reported ■ With the young
previously, things have been Kardashian
■ A retro clan in 1995
strained between him and the Bruce
girls. After telling Diane how before
important his family is, saying, ■ Winning any facial
Gold in the surgery
“I can’t let myself hurt them.
Decathlon
They’re the only ones I’m at the 1976
concerned with,” our source Olympics
says Bruce now hopes things
Burt
can be made better. ■ At his wedding to
“Things have been especially Kris in 1991 with Kris
all of their children
hard for Kylie. Now, Bruce wants
to rebuild some bridges with his Kourtney
girls,” says our insider. “He knows Brandon Khloé
Brody
how difficult it’s been for them.
Going out in women’s clothing
is a massive step for him and Rob
one he’s looking forward to. This
is his new life, and he’s going Kim ■ A proud dad to
to embrace it.” ■ ISSY SAMPSON Casey Bruce Kendall and Kylie

IN PUBLIC
news
■ Arriving at the IN PRIVATE
awards with his ■ Hidden away
mum on 17 April in the car, the
ring has moved
INDEX FINGER
RING FINGER
THE MYSTERY OF
ZAYN’S WEDDING RING
A ring, a stag, a hen do and mates saying congratulations. Hmm…
Z
ayn Malik and Perrie fan tweeted, “ZAYN HAD “Time for your surprise Perrie endless love for you. P.S You’re
Edwards’ engagement A WEDDING RING ON AT THE Edwards” and Perrie commented, actually my wife and married
has been a rocky road ASIAN AWARDS WTFFFF.” “I’m freaking out!” to meeeee.” This post was liked
– especially after those by Perrie, Zayn and Niall.
cheating rumours. They were EXHIBIT B THE STAG DO! EXHIBIT D THE CONGRATS! And at 10.03pm on 18 April,
planning a “Disney” wedding in On 12 April, Perrie’s close friend Most suggestive of all, at 5.04pm Cara posted, “You know you
June, but recently things seem to Cara Swan wished Niall, Liam, BOX HEAD TO GO IN HERE...
on 17 April, Cara tagged Perrie in went to a good wedding when
have significantly gathered pace. Zayn and Louis a “good few a Facebook post, saying, “Couldn’t your hangover finally goes at
Could the ex-One Directioner days on the stag!” on Facebook. have been more proud of my 10pm the next day.” This post
and his Little Mix fiancée already On 13 April at 8.14pm, Niall number one gi l P i dwards was liked by Perrie and Niall.
be married? Here’s the evidence… posted a pic of s ulations So, should we be buying
PIQTURED.COM; WIREIMAGE.COM; XPOSUREPHOTOS.COM
“Tequila anyone for presents? You’d better

EXHIBIT A THE RING! Zayn, Liam and with my speak up, Zayn and Perrie,
When Zayn turned up at the [ring if you want that set of napkin
UK Asian Music Awards to EXHIBIT C TH long rings… ■ SELINA MAYCOCK
collect his award for Outstanding On 13 April, at 4.
17 Apr
Achievement in Music on 17 April, wrote, “Just che Cara Swan 1hr girl
roudof my number one
he was wearing a new ring on the at Heathrow. Ital Couldn’thavebeen morep gratulationsandthank you for
today con love for you.
PerrieEdwards
index finger of his left hand. But coming for ya!” t today long long endless
blessing me with my role and marriedto meeeee
snapped leaving in the car later Perrie and Sophi P S You’reactually my wife
that evening, the ring had moved [Liam’s girlfriend Cara Swan 1 hr 18 Apr
to his ring finger – with a chunkier Then, on 14 Apr You know you went to a good wedding when your hangover
finally goes at 10pm the next day
ring in its original place. One 10.59pm, Cara wr

Selena sticks news
two fingers up
to the haters ■ “Haters
sorted. I’m off
for an ice cream”
#Theresmoretolove
Y
ou’re on holiday with being happy with me yall.
your friends – what’s #theresmoretolove” Her fans
the last thing you went crazy and we air high-fived
worry about? Internet her all the way from the UK.
trolls slating you for the way “Selena’s in an amazing place
you look in a bikini, maybe? right now,” a friend tells heat.
Well, that’s what Selena Gomez “After she split with Justin
faced when she was living it up [Bieber], she was in @selenagomez
on a beach in Mexico last week. a bad place, but her 6daysago
“Selena looks so fat,” one idiot confidence is back Ilove beinghappy with meyall
wrote on Twitter. “Put your thick and she’s distanced #theresmoretolove
legs away,” said another. Nice. herself from people
In a week where weight telling her how she
dominated conversations should look. Twelve
(witness Jamelia suggesting months ago, this
high-street stores should not may have broken her,
stock clothes “above a certain but now she’s proud
size”), you’d forgive Selena, of her curves and
22, if she let her critics get feels fabulous.”
to her. But no, not this girl. So, what does
The singer did a quick outfit sexy really look like?
change – slipping into a black, It’s Selena Gomez
cut-out swimsuit – and posted giving two fingers ■ The pic
the hottest picture EVER on to the haters. that got the
trolls talking
Instagram, writing, “I love ■ ELLIE HENMAN
■ Kim’s
been
looking
curvier
recently
KIM SACKS OFF THE DIET
Kim Kardashian-West’s diet plan is When she realised she’d put on weight,
so complicated, it needs its own diary. she didn’t have a meltdown like she
With Kanye often dieting and a strict normally might – she just got Spanx in
nutritionist who changes their meal the next size up sent over. Kim loves it
plans every ten days, it sounds like when she doesn’t have to be so disciplined.”
a right faff. The worst part? “I don’t It’s no surprise she likes to have a rest.
really have cocktails or desserts,” Kim Speaking in an interview as she was named
said last month. But they’re the fun bits! one of Time magazine’s 100 Most Influential
But it turns out that when she’s on her People, the star revealed she’s pretty
holidays, Kim says balls to the diet just like much always been on a diet of some kind.
us. Before flying to Armenia on 9 April, Kim “I always loved my best friend Allison
told her followers, “I can’t wait to explore [Azoff]’s lunch, because she got lots
SPLASHNEWS.COM; XPOSUREPHOTOS.COM
our country and have some yummy food!” of Cheetos and Oreos, and I was stuck
And the indulgence did her some good. with really healthy food,” she said. “I
“Kim put on 10lb in the ten days she was always begged her for some of her lunch.”
away,” an insider tells heat. “They didn’t Keep up the holiday vibes, Kim. Your
take their private chef, so she just let loose. curves totally suit you.
shian
Kim Kardashian West @KimKarda
ntry and have
Ican’twaitto explore our cou
someyummyfood!
oProud
#MyDadAndGrandparentsWouldBeS

news
ey
Jai
h ey Cor
e Mik an
Mik Dyl
Yes, Boyband can

dance... but they
CAN sing, too! Dyl
an
The boys have hidden talents. So we dug them up
T
hey’re the second But when we met Boyband (aka FYI), and we even found
act to get the Golden Corey Culverwell, Mike McNeish, a YouTube clip of him singing
Buzzer and we can’t Mikey Ureta, Dylan Mayoral and Gotye’s hit, Somebody That
wait until the non- Jaih Betote) last week, they I Used To Know (above) at a
singing, all-dancing Boyband admitted that they have school fundraising dinner in 2012. station and we had to bust
are back on our screens for the actually sung before and And Corey and Mikey out this huge dance – we got to
live semi-finals of Britain’s Got that the incriminating have secret pasts, too meet Harry, too. It was wicked!”
Talent, which start on 16 May. evidence was ■ Si: not – they starred in So, congrats to Britain’s Got
impressed Talent hosts Ant & Dec, who
The Judges are being much filmed. “There The Harry Hill
at first
tougher on dance troupes are probably Movie in 2013 pressed the Golden Buzzer.
this year, so it’s no wonder the loads [of videos (below). Corey Let’s not forget that they have
street-dance crew wanted to play of us singing], told us, “In the a not-so-secret singing past, too…
down their skills with a misleading actually,” Mikey film, we were ■ SELINA
name. When they took to the told us. Dylan, working in a gas MAYCOCK CLICK
stage and revealed they were clearly horrified at
called Boyband, everyone Mikey’s admission, /BGTboyband
ey To see young Dylan
assumed they were about to whispered to Jaih, Cor
singing Gotye
watch a bunch of boys singing. “We need to make
Simon Cowell wasn’t impressed that video private.” Mike
y
with their bluff. “That’s not your So, on a mission to bring
name. Is that really your name? you the truth, we trawled
What are you going to sing?” the internet (you’re
he asked. And when they told welcome) and found out
him they were actually a dance that Dylan went to The BRIT
crew, a sceptical Si replied, School (also attended by
FAMOUS
“What? Is this serious?” Adele and Amy Winehouse,

news
‘ADDICT’ K LY
back on the
She once said alcohol was
“one of my biggest vices”
– so why is she downing
Champagne from the bottle?
K
elly Osbourne
has been to rehab
three times, calling
alcohol a “gateway
drug” and adding that
“alcohol will always be an
issue for me until the day
I die”. But backstage at the ■ Friends
MTV Movie Awards last are worried
month, Kelly was pictured about her
swigging from a bottle
of Veuve Clicquot.
“Everyone is worried
about her emotional state
right now,” says a close friend
of the star in LA. “She’s been
drinking again for a few months
and it seems to be happening
more and more.” subsequently quit the show
Kel’s had a pretty stressful after a falling out with former
year: her “closest friend” and friend Giuliana Rancic. The pair
Fashion Police co-presenter have been at war on Twitter,
Joan Rivers tragically died with Kelly calling Giuliana “fake”,
in September last year. Kelly and describing their feud as ■ Pretty sure
that’s not a
“heartbreaking”. good idea, Kelly
She’s also found
■ With her herself single again been very open about her “When I was with Kelly last year,
ex Ricki Hall after a short-lived struggles with booze. In her she wasn’t drinking at all. She
last year fling with model autobiography/life advice book, was teetotal.” He adds, “To be
Ricki Hall just Fierce, which came out in 2009, honest with you, she never spoke
before Christmas. Kelly candidly describes herself to me about it – for her, maybe,
“She doesn’t like as an “addict”, saying, “Drugs and it was best to have it out of sight,
being alone,” alcohol are my biggest vices. It’s out of mind.” Kelly’s friend in
says her friend. all or nothing for me, I’m afraid.” LA adds, “I think it’s something
FILMMAGIC.COM; GETTYIMAGES.COM;
Now, it looks like And when she’s relapsed into she needs to deal with on her
all of the stress drinking, Kelly’s been honest, own. Kelly’s insisting all she
is getting to her. too. Speaking to a US website needs is a break in the UK
MATRIXPICTURES.CO.UK
Kelly, 30, who’s after her tearful, drunk meltdown away from Hollywood.”
been through on a plane in 2012, she said, With no work projects in the
periods of “I am a hypocrite for drinking, pipeline right now, let’s hope Kelly
sobriety in the [but] I’m not lying [about it].” takes time to escape and deal with
past, has always Last week, ex Ricki told us, her demons. ■ ISSY SAMPSON

Has 17-year-
news
old Kylie had

bum implants?
The petite
star’s bottom
has been
looking rather NOW
■ Yes, she’s
larger of late sitting down,
but still…
Y
ou’d be forgiven
for thinking that
Kylie Jenner’s
bum pictures on
Instagram last week actually
belonged to sisters Kim or Khloé
Kardashian. It seems almost
overnight (well, since 30 March),
Kylie’s previously petite derrière
has inflated enormously.
What on earth’s happened?
“Looking at the recent pictures
of Kylie, it does appear as though
she may have had some sort
of surgical procedure to enhance
her bottom. It’s most likely
BEFORE
a fat transfer, which is popular ■ Her bum
was smaller
in the US,” Mark Norfolk, clinical and flatter
services director at Transform in 2013
Cosmetic Surgery, tells heat.
“Before her bottom was not as
full, round and pert as it is now.” Last week, Kylie, 17, revealed she confident? Our insider claims, “It feels like there’s no point stopping
Dr Marcus Landauer, of struggled with her self-esteem seems Kylie’s had two procedures her because she’s 18 this year.”
Landauer Cosmetic Surgery, after growing up “with the most done on her butt. First, fillers to Last September, heat revealed
adds, “Looking at these, I wouldn’t beautiful sisters in the world”, smooth it, then fat taken from that Kylie was planning over
be surprised if she’d had surgery.” so is she using surgery to feel her thighs and belly and injected £50,000-worth of surgery
into her ass. Kylie’s (including work on her boobs
KYLIE’S KEEPING UP WITH obsessed – it’s been

worse since she
and nose) and, in January, we
reported how she had decided
THE KARD-ASS-IANS hooked up with

Tyga. She’s so fed
2015 was the year to change her
body – with “butt augmentation”
INFPHOTO.COM; PA; REX FEATURES; SPLASH NEWS.COM
up with feeling like at the top of her surgery wish list.

KHLOE a teenager, this is her Despite speculation around
■ Inflated
like a
way of proving she’s her plumped-up lips, Kylie’s
balloon a mature woman.” always denied having anything
Worryingly, it seems done to them and she’s recently
Kylie’s mum Kris could been sporting a more fresh-faced
be giving her daughter
KIM the green light.
look. But she said in an interview
earlier this year, “I’m not against
■ Plumped
to the max “Anything Kylie gets surgery. I’d never say no.”
done has to be signed If these pictures are anything
off by a parent,” our to go by, she’s already said yes…
source adds. “Kris ■ ELLIE HENMAN

Taylor,
8, eats
lunch
The waitress at B
F
ap
Tay’s favourite
diner tells us
all about what
she tucks into
S
teamed greens, kale
smoothies and no fat
in sight – that’s what
we imagine Taylor HER A
Swift to chow down on every
night. WRONG. According to on her and sh
a waitress at her local Cracker a ton of apple
Barrel diner in Hendersonville, dumplings – s
Tennessee, the willowy size-8 the dumpling
pop star loves deep-fried catfish, also polished
deep-fried okra and, you guessed deep-fried tr
it, a portion of chicken… have a tiny si
deep fried, obviously. totally balanc
The chain’s famed for its We used the
fried chicken dishes and website to wo
enormous portions, so heat many calorie
got in touch with the staff to super-size di
see what Taylor, 25, orders – up to a vein-c
and it’s not for the fainthearted. Where the he
COLEMAN-RAYNER; SPLASHNEWS.COM
“Taylor usually comes in with It’s not just

her family and sits by the window Taylor has, it
or out in the back room,” Connie a generous ti
– who served Taylor wh adding,
she last went home – wor
tells heat. “She really sc
likes apple butter and s
biscuits. I’ve waited
r
she comes here,”
■ Tay and
her “server” adds server Tamm
“She’s always very n
and is so humble. She fe
like she can let her guard dow
here.” Anyone else feeling hu
after all this? ■ ELLIE HENMAN
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azing
we’ve got major
a
You look
a
wardrobe envy
am
right now
, YOU’VE OUTDONE YOURSELF THIS WEEK...

SWEETIE DAAHLING
Blake Lively
in Monique
Lhuillier
The most chic
red-dress-emoji-
lady ever.
Harley
Viera-
Newton
in Chanel
Amber Summer
Heard tweed is a
in Temperley sweet and
London stylish option.
The slip dress is
the surprise hit
of this summer
– get used to it.
Go
r
de geo
ta us
il
Olivia
Palermo
in Valentino
GETTYIMAGES.COM; WIREIMAGE.COM
Star print
Maisie is having
Williams a major
in Narces moment
Another right now.
super-pretty
frock from the
GoT actress. …BUT WHO GOT
IT VERY WRONG?
BEFORE
But what were you
try not to vom
on the nice
ng?
magazine
inki
THE
th
STYLIST
WHAT MONEY BUYS, WE’LL STAY SKINT

IF THIS IS
Noomi
Rapace
It’s a bit
early in the
year to be
dressing like
a Christmas
decoration,
isn’t it?
Jaime
King
Our mums
might
suggest
a nice
slip, love.
2009
RRID
CAPITAL PICTURES; LANDMARK MEDIA; PA; REX FEATURES
Dianna Agron
Do you know what? We’ll l
the dress go – it’s not our
Chloe fave, but who didn’t wear
Sims something like this in thei
Ever had
a dream you teens to a family wedding 2015
turned up at
work in your
BUT WILL YOU LOOK
AT THOSE SHOES!
H
pjs? Chloe ■ Drop-red
Unforgivable. gorgeous in
really has…
Rosie Assoulin

sed ost
ot amu Alm sed
N
amu
GETTYIMAGES.COM

Crap, has
J-Law fallen
over again?
F’nar!

■ “Oink.
I’ve had that
Rebecca
Loos, I have”
pictures
You’re
You’re
no sexist
pig, are
you?
in there,
Jordan
WHEN? Sunday 19 April
WHERE? Sussex
“Not the first time a pig has gone to
WHAT? kiss me,” quipped Jordan in the caption
to this picture on her Instagram account. She was just
mucking out the livestock on her sprawling estate,
having a little LOL. She’s a farmer now. Probably be
a beekeeper tomorrow or an electrician or something.
■ “I whip ■ That giant

my belt back cloud costume
and forth…” isn’t fooling
anyone
Relax,
it’s a Vicky
attacked
belt by own coat
WHEN? Thursday 16 April WHEN? Sunday 19 April
WHERE? Atlanta, Georgia
Just for a moment there
WHERE? Manchester
Call yourself a Geordie, Vicky
XPOSUREPHOTOS.COM
WHAT? WHAT? Pattison? Geordies don’t wear

SPLASHNEWS.COM;
we did wonder. It’s not like

it would be totally unexpected for James coats unless they’re north of the Arctic Circle.
Franco to whip out his Sausage Of Art on So it serves you right that the wind blew it all
a film set, after all. But the shape is odd. over you. That’s karma, that is.

“I’d love to go
into politics…
I pretty much
rule Essex
anyway”
As the election race hots up, Joey Essex puts
down his hair gel and heads to Westminster
H
e’s grappled with some pearls of wisdom), and I would put speed cameras
gorillas, encountered chats with Deputy PM Nick Clegg, in shopping centres. You
aliens and now Joey who’s so amused by Joey thinking know when you’re shopping and
Essex is taking on his party is called the Liberal there are people walking really
the biggest challenge of all – Democats that they rebrand slow? Well, they’d all get fined.
politicians. In the latest episode their website for the day. Are you gutted David Cameron
of ITV2’s Educating Joey series, “I was buzzing when I heard didn’t have time for you?
he spends time with the party that,” Joey says proudly. Sadly, heat interviewed him and
leaders in the run up to May’s PM David Cameron snubs the we went inside Number 10…
General Election, getting to chance to meet the king of Essex. What? You went inside?
grips with their manifestos and But, after this whole experience, It’s so out of order.
finding out why people should how does Joey feel about politics? What’s been your highlight
vote for them – even though Time to find out… of doing the show?
he has to remain impartial It sounds quite jokes, but it’s
and deems them all “reem”. So, why politics, Joey? been meeting these MPs.
We’ll see Joey on a fishing boat I done the show really because And you’ve potentially met
with UKIP’s Nigel Farage (who he I didn’t know much about politics the next Prime Minister…
keeps calling “Michael”), he – they don’t really do it at GCSE. I know, it’s crazy. I’m just a normal
catches up with Ed Did you know who the PM was? boy from Essex. It’s quite surreal.
Miliband at a Labour Probably half a year ago, I didn’t. Has this given you a taste
rally (Joey gave him Which issues are most for politics?
important to you? I’d love to go into it, but I can’t say
The NHS. I fell off my bike I will actually sit in court screaming
when I was and taking notes. I can only just
seven and had about remember all their names.
to have stitches So, it won’t be Joey Essex
in my lip. MP then?
If you were I mean, I’m pretty much ruling
in charge Essex anyway, but I wouldn’t mind CHECKING OUT NUMBER 10
of the ruling it on the books, like it’s
“I dressed up smart to film
country, actually on contract: Joey rules down Downing Street to let
■ “What’s a what would Essex. I’m the right man for it – everyone know I’m a serious
ballot again?” you do? it’s my name. ■ KAY RIBEIRO guy. If I was in charge, I’d
change the door to baby blue.”
feature
The Only Way Is Westminster
MEETING MILIBAND
“I think he’s quite honest. He admits
CAMERA TIME WITH CLEGG
he’s made mistakes, but I feel like
he gets too much stick. I said to him,
“Look, just blank it, mate. Don’t look “He seemed quite a down-to-
at Twitter.” earth guy. He well wanted
a selfie with me. He slicked
his hair back and said ‘reem’.”
FISHING WITH FARAGE

“He was nice, completely
different to everyone else.
He seemed like he wanted to
go down the pub – like he’s
a Sugar Hut kind of guy.”
Educating Joey
Essex – General
Election, What
Are You Sayin’?
is on ITV2 on
Tuesday 5 May
GETTYIMAGES.COM; NEWS SYNDICATION; REX FEATURES
■ Keeping you
up, are we?

Love act
“OH, HERE SHE COMES, SHE’
S A MANEATER”
Nicole
moves on…
with a hot
younger man
She’s over Lewis and hooking up with
Twilight’s Jamie Campbell Bower
A
fter her stint in smile back on her lips. In fact,
the musical Cats, Nicole was so flattered by
Scherzy’s dating his bold declaration of lust,
world is open to she made it her mission to
a load of new opportunities find him. “Nic made her car
– namely fit young actors. wait for 40 minutes after the
At the Olivier Awards on ceremony, so she could locate
12 April, Twilight star Jamie Jamie,” another insider adds.
caught Nic’s eye after “She was supposed to leave
he was overheard telling straight afterwards, but was
his mates how sexy she determined to meet him.
was. “He told his friends She went into the after-party
backstage [he was presenting and, when she found him,
an award] that he thought they exchanged numbers.”
Nicole was stunning,” Nicole’s got form with
an eyewitness tells heat. younger guys. There was
Since splitting up with a six-year age gap between
Lewis Hamilton, Nicole’s Nicole, 36, and Lewis, 30.
looked pretty po-faced, but With Jamie, 26, there’s ■ Smug
much,
now it seems Jamie has put a a decade. Kudos to you, Nic.
Nicole?
PDA OFF! OFF!
MARNIE SIMPSON &

RICKY RAYMENT
The reality
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like heat rash in
the Lanzarote sun. MILEY CYRUS & PATRICK
SCHWARZENEGGER ARIANA GRANDE
Lock up your sons/daughters/bongs: & BIG SEAN
Ouch Miley’s single after splitting from They’re over, but will “remain
!
hot-as boyfriend Patrick “son good friends” according to their
of Arnie” Schwarzenegger. joint statement. Yeah, right…

#
Seen a celeb?
Seen a famous? Tweet us with your sightings! #Spotted
I need a
Hangover
cure, stat
A not-as-tall-
as-you’d-expect
BRADLEY SNAPPED!
COOPER walking
past the Boots,
Sophie Turner
opposite Angel
Game Of Thrones’ Sansa Stark was
tube station.
at Warren Street station, London.
Seen by Rebecca
Seen by
Georgia
■ Singing legend STEVIE eating at The Botanist in Westfield, London. star OLLIE LOCKE She’s Da One. It lost.
*WINNERS MAY BE CONTACTED AND BANK DETAILS WILL BE REQUIRED. PLEASE NOTE: SNAPPED CHEQUES MAY TAKE UP TO 28 DAYS TO ARRIVE.
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bags at JFK Airport in New Seen by Shanna ■ Footballer RIO at Cocorico in Val-d’Isère ■ Beauty And The Beast
York City. Seen by Nick ■ NICOLE FERDINAND and ski resort in France. star LUKE EVANS
■ Mercedes McQueen SCHERZINGER his kids watching WWE Seen by Alice C at the Bulgari Hotel
from Hollyoaks, aka sporting a leather jacket, Smackdown at the ■ Ex-Corrie and & Residences in
JENNIFER METCALFE, big sunnies and even O2 Arena in London. EastEnders actress Knightsbridge. He was
and her ex-Geordie Shore bigger hair, browsing Seen by Remi MICHELLE COLLINS there with his co-star,
boyfriend GREG LAKE the rails at House Of CB ■ Former Made In Chelsea judging a singing contest IAN MCKELLEN,
at Archer Street bar and the very fit
in London’s Soho. DOUGLAS BOOTH.
Seen by Caroline Seen by Laura
at’s ■ McBusted hotties ■ LAUREN POPE dj-ing
Wh tory?
s
the MATT WILLIS and in a floating booth on the
DOUGIE POYNTER Anthem of the Seas
drinking iced coffees cruise ship. Seen by Kay
and posing with fans in ■ Shadow Chancellor
Christchurch, Dorset. and MP ED BALLS going
NO 77 LIAM Seen by Emma into a café in Ipswich. He
GALLAGHER ■ TV presenter NICK probably needed a drink
Thanks to Thomas Morris KNOWLES chilling out after all that campaigning.
for this non-selfie selfie™. in his towelling robe at Seen by Ian Jackman
He saw Our Kid at The the spa in Centre Parcs ■ A mega-sweaty
Wrestlers pub in Highgate in Elveden Forest, Suffolk. RUSSELL BRAND with
before the Palace vs Man Seen by Talitha a man bun, preaching
City match. Send your pics ■ JEREMY KYLE to a guy with long hair
to the address above. at Exeter racecourse on Gray’s Inn Road in
THE£200PRIZEISONLYAVAILABLEFORTHEUNPOSEDPHOTOS
ANDNOTTHE“THEY’REBEHINDYOU”CELEBRITYSELFIE cheering on his racehorse London. Seen by Ellen

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DUFF was walking
to a car outside the Prescription
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Kiss radio studios
in London.
Seen by Andrew
without the
prescription
WIN
£200
Text or email your Snapped pictures
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■ TOWIE’s having dinner and
ELLIOTT looking super-trim at
WRIGHT flirting up a pizzeria in Notting Hill,
a storm at La Sala, Marbella. London. Seen by Georgia
Seen by Danielle ■ Emmerdale’s KELVIN
■ The Inbetweeners’ JOE FLETCHER tucking into
THOMAS wandering about ribs at Pesto Cabbage Hall
in Manchester. Seen by Rhys in Tarporley. He was really
■ EDDIE IZZARD, looking happy to pose for pictures,
fabulous in full drag, walking and even got given a piece
down Oxford Road in of birthday cake from
Manchester. Seen by Mair a nearby party for his troubles.
■ ANDY JORDAN from Made Seen by Emma Prescott
In Chelsea at the Ben Howard
concert at Alexandra Palace.
He was with a mystery brunette,
■ Pop star ELLA
HENDERSON walking down
Endell Street in London’s Covent
Cetraben
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■ Former DJ CHRIS MOYLES Manchester. Seen by Bobbie www.cetraben.co.uk
If you send comments, photographs or other material to us, you accept that it will become Bauer’s As close to your
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skin as you are.
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Mirror, mirror on the wall,
who’s the fittest
In our biggest turnout ever (you’d
think everyone was obsessed with
voting at the moment, or something),
hundreds of thousands of you have
voted for our 100 Hottest Hunks.
Technically, it was millions of you
– but a suspicious number were for
video game billionaire Gabe Newell
– nice try, internet! Now we’re
delighted to share the results:
100 chiselled, smouldering hunks
of masculinity, lined up for your
pleasure. Try not to lick the
pages, the ink might come off…
1JAMIE
DORNAN
32
He was sexy when he was
a model, he got sexier
when he played serial killer
Paul Spector in The Fall,
and he was actual, literal
sex itself in Fifty Shades
Of Grey. The fact that
the Belfast-born star
is a happily married
father is neither here
nor there. If anything,
it makes him even more
hot, if a bit less eligible.
2
ZAC
EFRON
3
HARRY
STYLES
27 21
Knocked off the Like a fine wine,
top spot! Zachary Harry is only
David Alexander improving with age.
Efron may not have Also like a fine wine,
had a film out for he’s rich, smooth,
a while, but he’s a little bit fruity,
still got that enjoyed by models
perfectly groomed, everywhere and
boy-next-door probably needs to
charm. And abs you breathe for a couple
could easily eat your of minutes after
dinner off. you pop his cork.
6
SCOPE FEATURES/CALVIN KLEIN; SPLASHNEWS.COM; WIREIMAGE.COM; XPOSUREPHOTOS.COM
CAMERA PRESS; FILMMAGIC.COM; GETTYIMAGES.COM; RETNACELEBS.COM; REX FEATURES;
DAVID
BECKHAM,39
He was hot when
4 5
he was young,
and has just got
DIEGO HARRY hotter ever
BARRUECO JUDD since. (Except

maybe the
24 29 cornrow
T years,
but we all make
The Spanish model from Ellie Goulding’s The McBusted drummer is the perfect mistakes.)
Beating Heart video, he’s single and combo of beautiful, charming and fun. We suspect
romantic, saying, “I’d rather have The only drawback is the drum kit. Maybe he’ll be hot
a girlfriend than be a player.” Swoon. that’s why he slipped a place from 2014? until the end
of time.
BLACKBURN, 28 9 HUNNAM, 35
8 TYLER 10 JAY 11 GARY
CHARLIE
JAMES, 32 BARLOW, 44
ACTOR ACTOR SINGER SINGER
17 TOMMY
MALLET, 23
REALITY STAR
18 CHRIS
HEMSWORTH, 31 19 CHRISTIE, 22
ACTOR
KYLE
REALITY STAR
20 DUNCAN
JAMES, 37
SINGER
25 JAMES 26 ANDY
SAMBERG, 36 27 ESSEX, 24 O’CONNOR, 25 29 ACKLES, 37
28 ROGAN 30 TAYLOR
JOEY JENSEN
ARTHUR, 27 YORK, 25
SINGER COMIC REALITY STAR REALITY STAR ACTOR MUSICIAN
B
C
37IAN
SOMERHALDER, 36 38 PARR, 28
ACTOR
MICHAEL
ACTOR
39 ZAYN
MALIK, 22
SINGER
1 DAVE
FRANCO, 29
TOR
45 DYLAN
O’BRIEN, 23
ACTOR
46 SHAYNE
WARD, 30
SINGER
47 MATT
BOMER,37
ACTOR
48 NICKY
BYRNE, 36
SINGER
12 HENRY
CAVILL, 31
ACTOR
13 TOM
HARDY, 37
ACTOR
15 JUSTIN
BIEBER, 21
SINGER
16 CHARLES
MICHAEL
DAVIS, 30ACTOR
21 HOWARD
DONALD, 47
SINGER
22 JOHNNY
DEPP, 51
ACTOR
23 ROBBIE
WILLIAMS, 41 24 TATUM, 35
SINGER
CHANNING
ACTOR
31 AIDAN
TURNER, 31
ACTOR
32QUICKENDEN,
JAKE
SINGER
26 33 FEEHILY, 34
MARK
SINGER
34 ROBERT
PATTINSON, 28 35 43
ACTOR
MARK OWEN,
SINGER
36 LUKE
HEMMINGS, 18
SINGER
42
51 DANNY JONES 76 MICHAEL
52 MATT CARDLE CLIFFORD
53 ASHTON IRWIN 77 BEN ADAMS
54DOUGIE 78 BEN HAENOW
POYNTER 79 ANDY BROWN
DANNY 55 MARIO FALCONE 80RONAN KEATING
56 GAVIN HENSON 81 GREYSON
DYER, 37 57 NIALL HORAN CHANCE
ACTOR 58 RICKY WILSON 82 TRISTAN EVANS
59 TARON EGERTON 83 OLLY MURS
60 RICKY MARTIN 84 MATTHEW
61 LOUIS GRAY GUBLER
43 GLASSPOOL,23
PARRY
ACTOR
44 RYAN
GOSLING,34
ACTOR
TOMLINSON
62 EMINEM
85 MARK READ
86 NATHAN SYKES
63 LEE RYAN 87 CALUM HOOD
64 DAVID GANDY 88 ASHTON KUTCHER
65 BEN HARDY 89 JAY McGUINESS
66 CHRIS EVANS 90 JOEL PEAT
67 MARK WRIGHT 91 KIAN EGAN
68 TOM 92 MIKEY WAY
HIDDLESTON 93 GRANT GUSTIN
69 AUSTIN MAHONE 94 BENEDICT
70 HUNTER HAYES CUMBERBATCH
71 ROSS LYNCH 95 CONNOR BALL
72 KIERAN 96 ELLIOTT WRIGHT
ELDRIDGE 97 ED WESTWICK
73 ED SHEERAN 98 TOM PARKER
74 KIT HARINGTON 99 TOM BURKE
49 THEO
JAMES, 30
ACTOR
50 MICHAEL
ZEGEN, 36
ACTOR
75 LIAM PAYNE 100 JOSH CUTHBERT
SPLASH NEWS Cut this page out and stick it near your bed, then imagine the super-hot actor running into your arms
WE TT
EASTWO
OF TEK
TORSHOE
SCO OD
#heateddebate
Don’t say we never let you get a word in…
Have your say!
KANYE DIIGALIT!
PEC
I ain’t Yeezus!
no gold This is
digger hard
work
Sorry, what? Using just goes to show people

bottle tops to get will do anything for social
Kylie Jenner’s trout pout? media. Come on, guys,
Surely it goes without you do realise she’s had
saying that no one in fillers and not actually
their right mind would using lids on her lips?
MATRIXPICTURES.CO.UK; PA; REX FEATURES; WENN.COM

think of giving themselves Rosie, by email
DIY lip jobs. I think that the Our lips feel sore just
#KylieJennerChallenge thinking about it…
Where’s
Hot on your heels

the bar in
this limo?
What else could
I’m loving all your Kanye be digging?
Email heat@
Game Of Thrones heatmag.com
specials, especially the
Game of Clones article
with my two fave
female characters:
Arya and Daenerys. Oh,
hai
Now all I have to do
is combine my love
Oh,
bye
! OUT WITH THE OLD... !
of GoT with my love

of shoes. Oh wait,
IN WITH THE NEW
I already have… Ross Poldark may be
Natalie England gone from our Sunday
Nice work, Nat. Have nights, but there’s no
a present from us. need to sob into your
lace handkerchiefs.
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52 WWW.HEATWORLD.COM
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Janine
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They’re back
together again
after a brief
separation.
Here, the nicest
couple on TV
show DEBORAH
FRASER their
darker side…
O
f all the ways we’d they reel off anecdotes spanning out with them is like sitting with with her craft shows, and Phil
expect to hear lovely, the whopping 16 years since a married couple – they finish made us snort with his innuendo-
posh Kirstie Allsopp Location, Location, Location first each others’ sentences and packed show Phil Spencer: Secret
describe work- popped up on our screens, it’s Kirstie constantly talks over her Agent (more on that later), they’re
husband and TV clear that Phil and Kirstie (aka softly-spoken TV husband. More back together with a new show
sidekick Phil Spencer, “that Phirstie) have visited more houses importantly, they’ve racked up so Love It Or List It, which actually
f**ker” isn’t one of them. Neither than Jordan’s had spray tans many admirers, they’re officially pits the pair against each other
did we expect them to politely and become BFFs along the way. now “acceptable to fancy”. as they try to convince people to
turn down the offer of a cup of tea, Despite them both being happily But after Kirstie got us all either sell or keep their homes. So
and ask for beer instead. But as settled with other people, hanging stitching lace onto everything it’s time to crack open those beers

INTERVIEW
Photography:
Alex James
■ Tsk, cowboy
builders, eh?
and find out if the Wills and Kate I was wincing. It was before I had made you look like Ben Elton. a magician, I had to tell him.
of the property world really are kids, and was suddenly getting K: It did not! I loved that suit. P: You didn’t say a word about
as perfect as they seem… paid lots of money for being on P: It’s harder for Kirstie it until the cameras started
telly, which meant some pretty as female fashions change. rolling, then I really got it.
You’ve been on TV together big extravagances on clothes, I’ve just lost a bit more hair and “Where’s your rabbit, Phil?”
forever. Is it cringeworthy like a bright red leather coat… got a different coloured suit on. I haven’t worn it since.
watching old episodes? Phil: Don’t forget you had Are you quite blunt with K: We bicker sometimes, but
Kirstie: Those outfits! The other those boots with a pocket for your each other now? we’ve only had seven fights in
night, there was an episode of phone that cost more than your K: Yes. Like when Phil wore a pink 16 years, which is pretty good,
Location from 2004 on TV, and car. And that weird shiny suit that waistcoat that made him look like and always about work stuff.

BANGING
Who is the moodiest ■ Its not Homes
of the two of you? Under The
Hammer, Phil
P: I know when Kirstie will be
on a shorter fuse and I’ll need
to tread carefully...
K: I’m just really bad at being cold,
and if you’re looking at houses
that need refurbishing, they’re
usually empty, freezing, and with
nowhere to sit. And twice recently
I’ve been caught out going to the
loo in toilets that don’t flush and
had to run around looking for
a bucket of water to try and
wash everything away.
Have either of you ever the face. I order a fizzy water
thrown a huge strop on set?
K: I kicked a radiator and shouted,
“KIRSTIEONCETHREW with ice and lemon, so it looks
like a G&T, but once I kind of
“For f**k’s sake!” because
someone had hung a bookcase
upside down. [Laughs.]
HER SHOESPhilAT A WALL ” winked at the barmaid, and
she thought it was code and
poured a sneaky gin into it.
P: And there was that time you K: We think people come
took your shoes off and threw on the show just because
them so hard, it damaged the wall. car because you were so cross! an epic water fight. I stood by they know they’ll get an
K: In my defence, I’d only just P: I used to get a bit sulky, but the camera, thinking no one afternoon in the pub.
gone back to work after having it all washes over me now. would cover me in water, but P: We went on Alan Carr: Chatty
kids and thought we were I haven’t got stroppy in ages. I got picked up and dragged Man and he said he gets told off
finishing at 5pm. We’d been K: You got stroppy when I set up to the floor and drenched. for encouraging irresponsible
filming all day and everything was a Twitter account for you. And you P: We’re usually pretty drinking by giving his guests
running late and my shoes were changed the password, because well-behaved on shoots. booze, and then there’s us taking
PHIL WEARS PINK JERSEY BY GRESHAM BLAKE. THANKS TO LEGO AND HAMLEYS FOR THE PROPS. PHOTOS: ALAN DAVIDSON; ALPHAPRESS.COM; PLANETPHOTOS.CO.UK; REX FEATURES
killing me, so I said, “If we’re not I tried to hack it the other day. And K: We don’t have any stories people house hunting, getting
HAIR AND MAKE-UP: VICTORIA BARNES. STYLING: RACHEL FANCONI. CLOTHES: KIRSTIE WEARS DRESS BY GOAT @ FENWICK; NECKLACE BY PEBBLE; EARRINGS BY BASIA ZARZYCKA.
finishing on time, I’m not going he is not calming. We once had about going out and getting them pissed and asking them
to see my kids before they go to go to a house that had pretty hammered or misbehaving. which home they want to buy.
to bed, and I’m not wearing much been left to go to ruin, Talking of booze, on Location We think that sounds like
these bloody shoes.” Then there were chickens and sheep you always ended the show an excellent way to decide
I took them off and chucked them, everywhere. I was upstairs by in the pub. Who is the better where to live…
but didn’t know my own strength myself and it was so creepy, and drinker out of the two of you? K: Sometimes we’ll be sitting
and they ricocheted off the wall then this f**ker suddenly jumped P: I’ve had more practise, but it’s there trying to get through
and nearly hit our director. out of a cupboard. I was terrified! not a good look to be negotiating to the estate agent for hours.
How very Clarkson of you. It sounds like you have big amounts of money when A friend of ours says he plays
So Phil, are you the calming a lot of fun together… game where every time
influence in this duo? K: When we used to mak e level of Phil’s pint of
K: You once locked yourself in the Relocation, Relocation, w g up – where you know
refill – you have to
CELEBRIDOODLES
d it happens a lot.
we also need to talk
t the innuendoes in
Kirstie’s drawn Kim Kardashian-West… Spencer: Secret
nt. There’s lots of
about “volatile
s”, “gaping holes and
ks”, and “damp
hes downstairs”...
ughs.] It’s schoolboy
r. That show was
heat e daytime, so it was
says: s watching it and

unny, and lots of
Yes, this who didn’t notice. As
looks just u say it with an entirely
like Kim K. ce, you get away with it.
If she was atching one and he was
cross-bred f she doesn’t trim her
VERDICT with a ple will go in the back
3/10 chicken by accident.” How is
ed on TV?

SWANNING ABOUT
■ You could convert
that into a houseboat
INTERVIEW
COSY
■ This London flat is
3ft x 6ft and will set
you back £1m. But it
does have a library
FAMILY ALBUM #1 FAMILY ALBUM #2

■ Kirstie and ■ Phil with his
EARLY DAYS her husband, wife Fiona, their
■ Help, hes tied property tycoon sons Jake and Ben
me to a tree” Ben Andersen and dog Jessie
P: You only find it funny You both have loads of people good at ironing – could that
if you have a grubby mind.
Although my mother told me
“PEOPLECOME on Twitter saying they fancy
you. Is that flattering?
be a show?
Hmm, not sure about that...
she’d been enjoying the show
and “all the funny remarks ONTHESHOW K: People tweet me saying,
“I don’t care what it says
K: Whenever we’re staying in
hotels, I’ll always know which
you’ve been making”.
So, Kirstie, you didn’t help
with the rude jokes then?
TO SIT IN about me, I really like
Kirstie Allsopp.” That’s
such a backhanded compliment.
room is Phil’s, as outside the
door there’ll be a tray of supper
– potato, salad and salmon –
K: Absolutely not. He tried
getting them in Location,
THE PUB’’ Maybe we’re so uncool to
like that it becomes cool?
and an ironing board. He’ll
iron each shirt three times.
but I put my foot down. Kirstie P: That’s a backhanded insult. P: You can’t go on telly
P: I snuck one into Love It Or K: We’re not exactly Kim and with a crumpled shirt.
List It and you didn’t notice. Kanye, though, are we? If you Do you get celebs asking
K: No, you did not! If we’re filming us and six boys running about. fancy Benedict Cumberbatch, you for property advice?
and I see a cat, I start panicking P: We should get [fellow property it’s cool to be a Cumberbitch, K: I had Damon Albarn as
and have to say, “Now that is a cat. TV presenter] Sarah Beeny’s boys but you don’t get people saying a client and I found him two
C-a-t. None of this p-u-s-s-y stuff.” there, too, as she’s got four. they’re a Spencerbitch. homes. Phil lost £200,000
Do you know everything K: Everywhere I go, people True. Kirstie, you’re a style when Michael Jackson died.
about each other? stop me to ask where Phil icon now, but do you ever slob What? How?
K: We certainly know a lot. Like is. Our families can’t go on around in tracksuit bottoms? P: I used to have a business
that Phil once got so drunk on holiday together, as it would P: I saw you in trackies once. that helped famous people
Christmas Eve that his mother drive our other halves insane K: No, you did not. You have seen to find houses. He’d chosen
found him asleep in a bush. us getting stopped and mistaken me in a pair of black trousers – his house, but he died three
P: That was years ago! Every for a couple all the time. never jeans – when we went to days before he signed for it.
Christmas morning, it’s still Have you ever had any weird Leeds that time in 2003. I’ll wear K: We were all in Cornwall
always bought up. reactions from fans? a wetsuit or trousers for skiing, together and I had to be
Do people assume you’re a K: Phil has lots of weird fans. but never any other time. very nice to Phil.
couple when they see you out? P: No, I don’t. Everyone comes up Kirstie, you’ve got your craft P: I didn’t throw a pair of
P: Yeah. We both have sons to me and always says their mum shows on the telly, but Phil – shoes at the wall, though. ■
and we were all in Cornwall watches the show, or their friend do you have any secret skills
together last summer, and people or their partner. No one ever says that you could exploit? Love It Or List It is on Tuesdays,
were doing double-takes seeing they are a fan. K: He is very neat and incredibly Channel 4, 8pm

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MAY 2015
THIS WEEK’S BEST TV | FILMS | MUSIC | BOOKS | STUFF
I used
to be in
Hollyoaks,
y’know
TV
Why Channel 4’s No Offence is a police

drama like no other PAGE 86
Where’s
my heat
interview?
FILM TV TV
Our verdict on the lush Keep track of the closest Josh Hartnett and
REX FEATURES
new version of Far From vote in years as we go to Eva Green are back
The Madding Crowd PAGE 70 the polls PAGE 90 in Penny Dreadful PAGE 86
Don’t just read it – watch Sky channel 364, DAB radio and
and listen to it as well… Virgin 338 and Freesat 520 Freeview 716

Film
■ “Don’t beat
yourself up, love
– I’m forever
treading on
snails”
STARRING: Carey Mulligan, Bathsheba, who inherits a this latest version does hold with a seeming lack of
Matthias Schoenaerts, Dorset farm in 1870. Three up, especially thanks to motivation. And Tom Sturridge
Tom Sturridge, Michael men – shepherd Gabriel Oak, brooding Schoenaerts as is pretty, but his petulant-brat
Sheen, Juno Temple local landowner Boldwood and the taciturn right-hand man turn isn’t quite what we
DIRECTOR: Thomas Vinterberg dashing soldier Troy – who never stops loving his envisaged for the complex Troy.
(CERT 12A, 119 MINUTES) vie for her hand in marriage. mistress, even when she Verdict? Love in the West
What’s right with it? With makes an ill-fated marriage Country proves suitably
The plot: Five decades after John Schlesinger’s 1967 to another of her suitors. beguiling in this intensely
the last major film version, film recently rereleased in What’s wrong with it? romantic period drama from
Thomas Hardy’s most beloved cinemas, comparisons are Fifty minutes shorter than hip Danish director Thomas
book again comes to the big inevitable. Perhaps best the previous version, the film Vinterberg (The Hunt). Get
screen. Carey Mulligan is enjoyed if you never caught does pay the price in terms of ready to swoon.
free-spirited, headstrong Julie Christie as Bathsheba, characters occasionally acting ★★★★ CHARLES GANT
WHO’S WHO IN MADDING CROWD
Carey Mulligan Matthias Schoenaerts Tom Sturridge Michael Sheen Juno Temple
GETTYIMAGES.COM
Maybe not as distractingly The Belgian commands With his flashing blade, Heartbreaking as besotted As Troy’s tragic first love
beautiful as Julie Christie, the screen as Gabriel, who sexy Sergeant Troy is the suitor William Boldwood, Fanny, Juno is rather short-
Carey brings a feisty pluck doesn’t give up after being one who first storms who offers security to his changed by this version,
to the role of Bathsheba. rejected by the girl he loves. our heroine’s defences. pretty neighbour. which trims her storyline.

HEAT ’S TOP
FIVE FILMS
1 Avengers: Age
Of Ultron (12A)
Lots of hunks and plenty
of action in this must-see
mega-sequel. ++++ ■ “We’ve all
turned up in
the same
outfit… awks”
Monsters: courage under fire if they are

to make it back in one piece.
What’s wrong with it? There’s
too much shouting, most of it
NEW
ENTRY Dark Continent What’s right with it? Taking coming from Harris as a ball-
VOICES:Sam Keeley, Joe Dempsie,
the cool premise of 2010’s busting sergeant, while the
2 Far From The Johnny Harris
low-budget success Monsters jittery action is often incoherent.
Madding Crowd (12A) DIRECTOR:Tom Green
(CERT 15, 121 MINUTES) and putting it on a war footing, Verdict: A visually striking
Carey Mulligan shines in this
swoonsome slice of Thomas
Misfits director Green ingeniously action pic with a good-looking
Hardy period drama. ++++ The plot: In a Middle East combines the real-world cast, this could have done with
crawling with hostile insurgents carnage of American Sniper less overwrought emoting and
and giant alien squid creatures, with fantastical, Cloverfield- more giant space squid. ★★★
four raw recruits must display style sci-fi. NEIL SMITH
OH LOOK, IT’S
3 Fast & Furious 7 (12A)

JOE DEMPSIE
)
Never mind the (ridiculous) TheboyfromSkinsdonegood

plot, just enjoy the (ludicrous)
action in the last in the series
to feature Paul Walker.++++
IN THE BEGINNING…
Joe – aka party animal Chris from
generation one of Skins – is now
27 and is getting more handsome
by the year.
■ “Someone CATCH HIM IN…

spilled tea on He plays G d i G
my Torso of Of Thrones
the Weeeek!” his kit off. H
may be a tr
4 The DUFF (12A) films to fini
inventive fashion, milking
A high-school senior discovers
Unfriended
she is the Designated Ugly Fat
Friend in this fresh, funny
STARRING:Shelley Hennig,
emails, YouTube videos, Skype
conversations and Wikipedia
COMING
Moses Storm, Renee Olstead He’s in the
teen comedy. ++++ pages for maximum tension. Monsters s
DIRECTOR:Levan Gabriadze
(CERT15, 82 MINUTES) What’s wrong with it? It’s and is grea
ultimately still a movie about in it. He’ll
next be see
The plot: A teen suicide victim kids behaving badly, as they
in This Is
returns from the grave to take get picked off one by one, and England ’9
revenge on the friends and some of the more irritating the final
enemies who cyberbullied her, ones can’t die fast enough. chapter
stalking them online in a thriller Verdict: A resourceful and in the epic
that unfolds entirely on one clever suspense film that film and TV
5 Child 44 (15) character’s laptop screen. occasionally taps into the drama, due
A plum role for Tom Hardy on Channel
investigating gruesome
What’s right with it? First-time deeper, underlying horror ■ We’d let
4 later
crimes in Soviet Russia. director Gabriadze exploits his of life in the 24-7 internet age. this year.
him sit on
formal limitations in highly ★★★ LIAM WRIGHT our throne
++++
2 – 8 May 2015 WWW

Music
CARLY
RAE
EPS E N
J R VIDEO
ON HE
CRJ talks us through 2015’s most
culturally important moving
picture – her amazing video for
new single I Really Like You
Canadian singer/songwriter extravaganza of a video,
Carly Rae Jepsen has a knack starring a line-fluffing Tom
for writing songs catchier Hanks (who doesn’t know Carly Rae
than the plague. With all the words) and actual Jepsen’s new
single I Really
international super-hit Call Me Justin Bieber. Oh – Like You is
Maybe already under her belt, and Carly Rae herself. out now
CRJ’s about to release the We called up Carly
huge I Really Like You. It’s (actually, not maybe)
flanked by a lip-syncing for a chat about her video… THE EMOJIS
“We had a lot of fun with BIEBS & HANKS
emojis on the video – we DANCING!
tried to sneak in little subtle “[Having Justin Bieber
jokes like the ‘Run, Forrest, there] was a happy surprise.
Run’ with the little man and He’s been part of this project
the trees – stuff like that. from the start and one of my
We thought, ‘What could biggest supporters, so it was
we do here to make this nostalgic. The dancing was Hank
even more silly?’” pretty laissez-faire. Tom s
and I don’t call ourselves
dancers by any stretch of the
imagination. It was always
going to be goofy because
that’s the heart of the song.”

heat PROMOTION
FOXY:
THE LIP SYNCING!
“I think what we all loved about
the video is that Tom kind
of purposely misses half of
Man
the lyrics. It’s like a botched
attempt at lip-syncing because
the concept is that he’s coming
to be in the video, so he’s
abo
■ “Blah,
blah”
learning the lyrics on the way.
He’ll hit a word with gusto,
which makes up for all the
other ones he misses.”
tow
May bank ho
madness – ’ere
we come!
■ Swipe
right?
TINDERING!
“To actually have Tom Hanks
on Tinder was amazing. We
You know what my yourself to FoxyBingo.com
weren’t sure if everyone was
favourite month is? and win yourself some big
going to agree with it, but May. There’s TWO bank ol’ prizes – you get £5 free
everyone was super-down. holidays! That means two when you join, so it’d be
We thought, let’s do it, let’s try more whole days to do rude not to! Let’s face it,
and see if Tom Hanks will say whatever ya fancy. Whether it’ll probably be raining
he’s pregnant on top of it all. that’s perfecting your fly come June, so the jigsaw
He was so game for everything fishing, sitting in the park can wait till then.
and it was so fantastic. being lazy, or finishing that Sadly, this is my last week
I wouldn’t swipe right for jigsaw of Charles II you’ve in heat, but you can keep up
Tom or Justin romantically. been working on for three with all my antics on my blog
One’s a little too old and years. Better still, get at FoxyBingo.com. Be lucky!
one’s a little too young.”
THINGS I’M LOVING THIS WEEK!

THE LOLS!
“I didn’t nick my
Jepsen chair from
the set, but on
1 ROYAL BABY
I’ve love the Royals. I’ve sent Kate
and Wills a cuddly little fox teddy
for the new royal baby that says,
“Foxy Bingo!” when you press its
another shoot, I got belly. Classy, eh? Maybe I should send
some green Louis George one, too...
Vuitton shoes from
the stylist. But then
I realised she had
stuffed them with
socks, so they would
2 FOXY’S TUNE OF THE WEEK
I’m loving OMI’s summer track Cheerleader. It reminds me
of my days as a cheerleader. I was always on top of the
pyramid.
fit me because they
were a size too big.
It was so sad. “ 3 HAPPY BIRTHDAY
PENELOPE CRUZ!
Did you know that 28 April is
Penelope Cruz’s birthday? I’m popping
out of a cake for her later.
■ Wave
your hands
in the air…
4 NATIONAL CHOCOLATE
CUSTARD DAY
I hope you’re all ready for
National Chocolate Custard Day on
3 May? I’ll be filling a paddling pool with
the stuff if anyone fancies popping
18+, WWW.GAMBLEAWARE.CO.UK, TS & CS APPLY
er
Bieb round mine?
“It was one of the better

days of my life, I’m not
5 LOVELY WEATHER
The sun’s been out and the
weather is starting to really warm
up. I might need a fur-trim soon – I’m
burning up under all this fluff.
going to lie. The vibe was
so good, all day long.”
FOLLOW FOXY @FOXYBINGO
HEAT ’S TOP
Books
The Gracekeepers
KIRSTYLOGAN
FIVE BOOKS
What you should be
reading, right now
(Harvill Secker, £12.99)
The plot: In a water-

1 The Day We
MY FAVOURITE BOOK
logged world, circus
performer North travels
Disappeared
Lucy Robinson
Loveable Rogues’
the seas with a real bear
and a colourful cast of
(Penguin, £6.99)
Twisty, intelligent slice of
Eddie Brett
clowns, acrobats and superiorfiction. ★★★★★ Life
dancers. Meanwhile, on
Keith Richards
an island, Callanish lives
alone, working as a sort (W&N, £8.99)
of watery funeral director. “I read Keith
There’s political tension Richards’ book
between people living and it’s just
on the land and those incredible – the geezer
bobbing around in boats – 2 The Love Shack should be dead about ten
and, tenser still, both girls Jane Costello times! Bits of it feel like
(Simon & Schuster, £7.99) fiction, because you think,
have big secrets to keep.
Chaos and LOLs ensue ‘How can a human being
Batten down the hatches, when a girl moves in with
there’s a storm coming… actually do this stuff?’”
her bf’s folks. ★★★★
What’s right with it? The
setting is truly magical –
even those who wouldn’t What’s wrong with it? The
normally touch a fantasy novel major downside is you’ll find
with a 10ft pole will love the yourself longing for things you’ll
drama of the circus and the never have – namely a snuggly NEW
ENTRY
soothingly descriptive language. bear friend and a circus boat.
The characters are believable Major fantasy FOMO. 3 The Gracekeepers
enough that the strange setting Verdict: An engaging, quirky Kirsty Logan
(Harvill Secker, £12.99)
works, and you’ll really find fantasy that’s perfect for
Magical fantasy novel
yourself rooting for North and summer escapism. Pop a
set in a watery future.
Callanish. Read it in the bathtub copy in your beach bag asap. Read it in the tub!
for a truly immersive experience! ★★★★ LIZZY DENING ★★★★
ALSO OUT 4 The Lie

NEW
ENTRY
WHAT ARE THEY

THIS WEEK... CL Taylor (Sphere, £7.99)
Excellent psychological
thriller about a woman
READING?
Naked At The hiding a secret. ★★★★ Who? Kate
Albert Hall Hudson at
TRACEY THORN Heathrow
(VIRAGO, £16.99) Airport with
The Everything But Gregory David
Roberts’ Shantaram
The Girl singer’s
FAMEFLYNET.UK.COM; REX FEATURES
(Abacus, £10.99).
fascinating look at the
What is it? The fascinating
role of singing in life true story of a man who
and pop culture, 5 The Vintage Guide escaped from jail and fled
including some ToLoveAnd Romance to Bombay, where his
brilliant insights Kirsty Greenwood
(Pan Macmillian, £7.99)
extraordinary adventure
into The X Factor. Modern love story with a of a life really began.
★★★★ BOYD HILTON fun vintage twist. ★★★★
‘Absolutely
mesmerizing’
GILLIAN FLYNN, AUTHOR OF GONE GIRL
JON SNOW Cartoony .99
version of £12
FIGURINE the hot Kit
Harington
character,
measuring
33/4 inches STARK
‘Brilliant’
and wearing TANK TOP @MARIANKEYES
a mud-covered
For fashion-y ladies
.99 outfit. Dreamy!
‘Gripping and
£8 showing off their GoT
fandom – the house Stark
£229 logo is printed in eye-
catching metallic
ingenious’
ink, plus “Winter
Is Coming”
catchphrase.
ROBB
STARK’S KATE MOSSE
0
SWORD 1.7
£8
He may be dead,
but the King in the
North’s sword was
pretty impressive.
You have to be over
18 to own this.
SET OF THREE
DRAGON EGGS WEIRWOOD
For the real
£73 SNOW GLOBE
.99 connoisseur,
replicas of Yes, it’s essentially
the eggs used a big snow globe
on set, all containing one of the
housed in Westeros trees with
a satin lined, a face carved into it.
hand-crafted All items available from
wooden case. www.hboshopeu.com
■ “I know
you stole my
Immac”
DVD
everyone simply wanted to forget about
Exodus: What’s right with it? Director
cott (Gladiator) knows
Ridley Scott the death of Christopher Harper’
Gods And Kings how to handle
andle spectacle and there
STARRING: Christian Bale, Joel Edgerton,
Sigourney Weaver (Cert 12)
some great
eat set-pieces – especially
the ten plagues sequence.
In a nutshell: A What’s wrong with it? The
reimagining of the characters feel one-dimensional
story of Moses (Bale), and the storytelling is routine.
in which he turns Extras: Deleted scenes,
against the Egyptian commentary, more on the Blu-ray.
Pharaoh Ramses (Edgerton), and Film: ★★★ Extras: ★★★★ IKnowWhoKilledHim.com
helps Hebrew slaves escape. BOYD HILTON
Do you?
t
WORDS: JENNIFER READ-DOMINGUEZ. PHOTOS: REX FEATURES; @RONBROWN/TWITTER
Celebrities
eat food,too! CELEBSTHAT
IT’S NEVILLE LONGBOTTOM
LOOKLIKE
WITH HIS SHIRT OFF! FOOD
Spencer Matthews
and a flame-grilled steak

KAY’S
SoapyBubble
EMMERDALE
Our First Lady of Soap, Kay Ribeiro, on what the
good folks of Soapland are up to this week
Alcohol
is not your
friend,
Loz
Not good
Laurel’s been a happy
THIS WEEK’S SOAPS
drunk till now, but when Marlon
snaps and calls her an alcoholic,
she sees red and punches
him in the face. Hard.
Passthemints
The last thing you need when
’ENDERS
you wake from a coma is Richard
Blackwood breathing on you. Ronnie tells him
to stay clear – but will he listen? Elsewhere,
Kat and Alfie have a cheeky smooch and one
lucky Walford couple wins the lottery. OMG etc.
Last week,
I didn’t think
that Laurel’s
drinking could
get much Really bad Mary,Mary,quitecontrary
Battered Marlon Todd’s a right evil sod. Not
CORRIE
worse. Boy, still thinks he can
save his wife, but
content with messing with mum
Eileen, now he’s getting Mary’s motorhome
was I wrong… the doctor tells
Laurel she needs
towed. Is nothing sacred? Also, desperate to
keep Max, David does a bunk with the kids – with
to go to rehab Callum hot on his tail – and Steve finds a dog.
immediately.
Then Rhona and
Paddy decide
Leo isn’t safe
around her,
either. Yikes.
Whilethecat’saway…
…Jimmy will play. Jimbo
EMMERDALE
Pretty scary
doesn’t really have the
balls to cheat on Nicola again, but is stopping
Cain’s
Even couldn’t-care-less Bernice from killing Tracy for nicking her watch.
abo ut “th e Lau rel
concerned Ouch. And Emma’s livid James and Chas are
Marlon
sitch”, especially after getting friendly, so fakes being mugged.
will Laurel
needs eye surgery. But
d Cai n’s “friend ly” adv ice?
hee
Run, Marlon, run!

Oh God, drunk Laurel
does something so
unthinkably bad that Thesecretofeternalbeauty
Marlon can’t look Porsche begs Grace to find
at her (even with his one HOLLYOAKS
a way to keep Reenie in jail,
good eye). Can there so Grace plants drugs in her moisturiser – as
be any way back now? you do. Meanwhile, Tony tries to prove Lockie
is conning Diane, Harry tries to get Cleo back
and Trevor finds a lacy bra in Dylan’s bag.
TV CATCH-UP
TV
On iPlayer, on the Interweb,
on demand – our pick of the
stuff you might have missed
out on this week
EP1: FAR RIGHT & PROUD Weekend With

Scarier than those dogs on Release The Hounds, some Aled Jones
Russian nationalists featured in this film carry knives, (ITV Player)
threaten immigrants and think Russia should be kept
“white”. And Reggie embedded himself among them
ITV’s weekend breakfast show is
fearlessly. He also met some freaky Putin obsessives. a freewheeling treat, with celeb
chat, music and reviews.
OYD-O-VISION!
V expert Boyd Hilton gives his
verdict on the week’s telly
The Paul O’Grady Show
O
ne of the big TV (ITV Player)
surprises of recent years The great man’s talk show is
has been the rise of back on ITV daytime, so you can
Reggie Yates as one of the best watch all kinds of amazing
current affairs reporters on TV. interviews on catch-up.
I’m not joking. When he’s not
hosting weird “horror” game
show Release The Hounds on
ITV2, Reggie is carving a nice
niche as BBC3’s foremost
investigative reporter. It EP2: GAY AND UNDER ATTACK
In this terrifying exploration of just how
started in 2013 with Teen rampant homophobia is in Russia these
Gangs, then last year’s Extreme days, Reggie met some of the anti-gay Inside Harley Street
South Africa. Now his new protestors who openly attack young gay (BBC iPlayer)
three-parter, Reggie Yates’ people in public and, in a darkly-comic Eye-opening documentary
moment, allowed a naked homophobe
Extreme Russia, is his finest to thrash him with a branch in a sauna. series about the often weird
work, so far. Here’s why… world of posh private medicine,
including healing with leeches.
EP3: EXTREME
MODEL FACTORY
The freezing
TV THAT’S NOT ON TV
temperatures in
Siberia are hard
to take, but even
tougher to deal with
are the creepy dudes
who recruit models
as young as 13 and
inspect them while
they’re standing there
Grace & Frankie
in bra and pants. Even (Netflix, from 8 May)
worse, we learned that Jane Fonda and Lily Tomlin star
REX FEATURES
kids as young as five as two women whose husbands

are being taught
how to pose and diet. suddenly reveal they’re gay.

WatchTVwithusonTwitter@heatworld
Britain’s Got Talent

ITV, 8pm
You already know if you’re
going to watch this. We’re not
saying that reading this preview
is redundant, heavens no – you Do you like
should always read heat’s TV our new
previews – but our point is that table?
BGT is so finely polished a
formula that we could do
nothing to persuade you or
dissuade you from watching it.
You either like hypnotic dogs,
peculiar burlesque acts and
endless flaming street-dancers
or you don’t. And if you don’t,
only you can say whether Simon
and David’s flirty repartee, or
Ant & Dec’s effortless, friendly
charm are enough of a draw
to overcome your reluctance.
They should be, because they’re
really good. Why do you think PICK OF
they keep winning awards? THE DAY
★★★★★ CHRIS LONGRIDGE
BEST OF THE REST
Ninja Warrior UK Atlantis Play To The Whistle

ITV, 7pm BBC1, 7.45pm ITV, 9.15pm
We appreciate that it’s Oh, that Jason (Jack In the sports-based panel
not the most appetising Donnelly), he’s changed. show cunningly hosted Britain’s Got More Talent
prospect, but neither was The Oracle’s prophecy by Holly Willoughby, ITV2, 9.15pm
Total Wipeout, and that was right: the evil team captains Frank Stephen Mulhern gathers Ant & Dec for more
was a hoot. If extreme Pasiphae (Sarah Parish) Lampard and Bradley game-show japes and David Walliams for more
physical challenges don’t is Jason’s mother and Walsh are joined by David Versus... madcap action. And that’s all as
sound like your cup of this news has blackened a rather exciting line-up. well as probing the best auditionees and all that
tea, embrace how much his heart. He’s gone all That nice chap Dermot malarkey. Busy chap! ★★★★ BOYD HILTON
fun the programme mad and reckless, and O’Leary and comedian
makers are having. It’s doesn’t care about Romesh Ranganathan FILM X-Men: Days
call Ninja Warrior UK anyone. Not even – – both Arsenal fans, Of Future Past
for eff’s sake! Does that whisper it – Ariadne note – are joined by TV Sky Movies Premiere, 8pm
A cornucopia of superheroes
sound like a show that (Aiysha Hart). Pythagoras presenter Christine gather to travel through time
takes itself seriously? (Robert Emms) sets out Bleakley, who’s engaged and save humanity. ★★★★
Neither should any of us. to find help, trying to to Mr Lampard, of
Ben Shephard, Rochelle get the old Jase back, course, and actual
The Following
Sky Atlantic, 9pm
Humes and Chris Kamara but not everyone is as Arsenal footballer Alex As Joe Carroll’s execution
keep things rolling along. keen to achieve that goal. Oxlade-Chamberlain. day arrives, Ryan fears
★★★★ CHRIS LONGRIDGE ★★★★ JASON ARNOPP ★★★★ BOYD HILTON that he won’t go quietly.
Of course he won’t! ★★★★
Random FILM The Inbetweeners 2

Or What! Sky Movies Premiere, 10pm
The boys head Down Under
24-7 POP AND CELEBRITY NEWS! WW2 From Space in this sequel, which is even
CHANNEL364ONSKY
H2, 7pm
more outrageous and funny
CHANNEL338ONVIRGIN How did they manage
CHANNEL520ONFREESAT
than the first film. ★★★★★
to film this?

BBC1 BBC2 ITV C4 CHANNEL 5
6am Breakfast News. 10.0 Saturday Kitchen 6.15am FILM Gambling House (1950, b/w) 6am CITV. 8.25 News. 8.30 Weekend. 9.25 The 6.15am How I Met Your Mother. 6.40 How I Met 6am Milkshake! 10.0 Teenage Mutant Ninja
Live. 11.30 Paul Hollywood’s Bread. 12.0 News; ★★★ Crime drama with Victor Mature. 7.35 Jeremy Kyle Show. 10.20 The Jeremy Kyle Your Mother. 7.05 Challenge Dubai. 8.0 The Turtles. 10.35 The Dog Rescuers. 11.05 Cowboy
Weather. 12.10 Football Focus. 1.0 Football FILM The Red Beret (1953) ★★★ WWII Show. 11.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show. 12.30 News; Morning Line. 9.0 Everybody Loves Raymond. Builders & Bodge Jobs. 12.0 Cowboy Builders &
Focus: Championship Special. 2.15 Live adventure with Alan Ladd. 9.0 The Nature Of Weather. 12.40 The Jeremy Kyle Show. 1.45 9.30 Everybody Loves Raymond. 10.0 Bodge Jobs. 1.0 Cowboy Builders & Bodge Jobs.
Snooker: The World Championship. 4.30 Final Britain. 10.0 Live Snooker: The World Doc Martin. 2.50 Who’s Doing The Dishes? 3.50 Everybody Loves Raymond. 10.30 Frasier. 11.0 2.0 FILM Columbo Undercover (1994) ★★★
Score. 5.10 FILM WALL.E (2008) ★★★★★ Championship. 12.0 Alex Polizzi: Chefs On Trial. FILM The Great Outdoors (1988) ★★ Comedy Frasier. 11.30 The Big Bang Theory. 12.0 The Big Detective drama with Peter Falk. 3.55 FILM
Pixar animated adventure with the voice of Ben 1.0 Michel Roux’s Service. 2.0 James Martin’s with John Candy and Dan Aykroyd. 5.30 ITV Bang Theory. 12.30 Marvel’s Agents Of SHIELD. Secret Liaison (2013) ★★★ Thriller with
Burtt. Food Map Of Britain. 2.20 Timewatch: Inside The News London; Weather. 5.45 News; Weather. 1.30 Channel 4 Racing. 4.15 Come Dine With Me. Meredith Monroe. 5.35 The Nightmare
Mind Of Adolf Hitler. 3.10 Timewatch: The Making 4.50 Come Dine With Me. 5.20 Come Dine With Neighbour Next Door.
Of Adolf Hitler. 4.0 The World’s Most Me. 5.50 Come Dine With Me.
Photographed. 4.30 Live Snooker: The World
Championship. 5.30 Iceland – Land Of Ice And
Fire: Natural World.
Pointless Celebrities, 6.55pm Quartet, 9.30pm Cliffhanger, 10.15pm Men In Black II, 8.15pm NCIS, 8.20pm
6.40 BBC News 6.0 New You’ve
Been Framed! 6.30 Britain’s
6.50 BBC Regional 6.30 Dad’s Army Unleashed! 6.20 Come Dine Horror Homes
News; Weather (b/w) First-ever Wild accidents With Me (R) A man who turned his
episode of the classic caught on camera. house into a fortress
6.55 Pointless comedy. (R) 6.45 News after being burgled
Celebrities 10 times. (R)
With Helen Skelton 7.0 Live Snooker: 7.0 PICK Ninja
and Radzi The World Warrior UK 7.15 For The Love Of 7.20 Can’t Pay? We’ll
Chinyanganya. Championship The fourth heat of Cars Take It Away
Hazel Irvine the obstacle-course Restoring a Rover Debtors make
7.45 PICK Atlantis introduces the fourth challenge. SD1 police car. (R) accusations to the
Jason’s discovery and final session of SEE TODAY’S PICKS. police about two High
leaves him the second semi-final Court enforcement
vulnerable. at the Crucible agents. (R)
SEE TODAY’S Theatre in Sheffield, 8.0 PICK Britain’s 8.15 FILM Men
PICKS. where the first player Got Talent In Black II 8.15 News
to reach 17 frames Ant and Dec host the (2002) ★★★ Sci-fi
8.30 The National will progress. fourth audition show. comedy sequel with 8.20 NCIS
Lottery: In It Subsequent SEE TODAY’S PICKS. Will Smith and A petty officer is
To Win It programmes subject Tommy Lee Jones. killed. (R)
Quiz show, hosted by to change.
Dale Winton. 9.10 NCIS
9.15 PICK Play To The body of a lance
9.20 Casualty The Whistle corporal is
Connie goes on trial 9.30 FILM Quartet With Dermot O’Leary discovered in an
for Alfred’s murder. (2012) ★★★★ Three and Romesh empty house. (R)
former singers’ plans Ranganathan.
for a fundraising SEE TODAY’S PICKS.
10.10 News concert for their 10.0 FILM Dredd
retirement home are 10.0 News; Weather (2012) ★★★★ Sci-fi 10.10 CSI: Crime Scene
10.30 Match Of The Day disrupted by the thriller with Karl Investigation
Including action arrival of a famous 10.15 FILM Cliffhanger Urban. A caped vigilante is
from Liverpool vs diva. Comedy drama, (1993) ★★★★ Action killed while trying to
Queens Park with Maggie Smith thriller with Sylvester protect a homeless
Rangers. and Billy Connolly. Stallone. man.
11.55 The Football League Show. 1.05 11.0 QI XL. 11.50 FILM Perfume: The 12.15 Jackpot247. 3.0 The Jeremy Kyle 11.55 Stephen Merchant: Hello Ladies. 11.05 Law & Order: Special Victims Unit.
Weather For The Week Ahead. 1.10 News. Story Of A Murderer (2006) ★★★ Period Show USA. 3.40 Nightscreen. 12.55 The Last Leg. 1.55 Hollyoaks. 4.05 12.05 SuperCasino. 3.10 Autopsy: The OJ
thriller with Ben Whishaw. 2.0 FILM Sarah Beeny’s Selling Houses. 5.0 Double Simpson Murder Case. 4.0 Psychopath:
Honeymooner (2010) ★★★ Comedy with Your House For Half The Money. 5.55 The The Nazi Killer. 4.50 Make It Big. 5.15
Gerard Kearns. 3.10 This Is BBC2. Common Denominator. Angels Of Jarm. 5.40 Roary The Racing
Car. 5.50 Roary The Racing Car.
● STV As Main ITV except: 12.15am The Nightshift. 5.0 Nightscreen. ● BBC1 Scotland As BBC1 except: 4.30pm Sportscene Results. ● BBC2 N Ireland As BBC2 except: 2pm Irish Cup
REGIONAL VARIATIONS Final. ● BBC2 Scotland As BBC2 except: 5.30pm Landward. 6.0 Collectaholics. ● S4C 6am Cyw. 8.0 Stwnsh Sadwrn. 10.0 Tag. 10.40 Dylan Ar Daith. 11.35 Bro: Llandysul. 12.0 Cefn
Gwlad. 12.30 Ffermio. 1.0 Caeau Cymru. 1.30 Doctor Doctor. 2.0 Sgorio. 5.0 C’mon Midffild. 5.30 Cofio: Ibiza Ibiza. 6.0 Rownd A Rownd. 6.20 Rownd A Rownd. 6.45 Newyddion A Chwaraeon. 7.0 Noson Lawen I’w Chofio. 8.0 Ibiza Ibiza.
9.30 Rygbi. 10.30 Milwyr Y Welsh Guards. 11.0 Jarman O’r Stiwdio Gefn.
RADIO PICK SKY1 HEAT TV ITVBE E4 BBC3 SKY LIVING SKY

ATLANTIC
Graham Norton (Radio 2, Including at Including at 3pm Including at 6pm Including at 6pm Including at 7pm Including at 6pm
10am) With guests Will 6pm Modern Summer’s Coming! Dinner Date. 7.0 The Big Bang Great Movie Border Security: Including at 6pm
Young, Mary McCartney Family. 6.30 The Pop Party 40. Dinner Date. 8.0 Theory. 9.0 Mistakes Not In Canada’s Front Without A Trace.
and Felicity Kendal. ★★★★ Simpsons. 7.0 6.30 Heat Up Your Dinner Date. Zoe FILM Coming 3D. 7.10 Top Gear. Line. 8.0 CSI: 7.0 Without A
NCIS: Los Angeles. Weekend! 7.0 H’s from London To America (1988) 8.10 Don’t Tell The Crime Scene Trace. 8.0 Blue
Sounds Of The ’80s 8.0 Hawaii Five-0. Old School Pop looks for love. 9.0 ★★★ 11.20 Bride. 9.10 Live At Investigation. Bloods. 9.0 PICK
(Radio 2, 10pm) Sara Cox 9.0 A League Of Party! Top 20. Botched. Reality The IT Crowd. The Apollo. 9.40 9.0 Criminal The Following. 10.0
chats to Human League Their Own. 10.0 series following a 11.50 The IT Live At The Apollo. Minds. 10.0 The Last Week Tonight
and Heaven 17 founding Mayweather V
4MUSIC pair of cosmetic Crowd. 12.25 The 10.10 Happy Enfield Haunting: With John Oliver.
member Martyn Ware Pacquiao: At Last. Including at surgeons. 10.0 Inbetweeners. Valley. 11.10 Family Behind The Scenes. 10.35 The Enfield
about ’80s electropop, 11.0 A League Of 7.30pm The Big Jerseylicious. 11.0 12.55 The Guy. 11.35 Family 10.30 Stalker. Haunting: Behind
and steps back in time Their Own. 12.0 Juicy List Show: 20 Bridezillas. 12.0 Inbetweeners. 1.25 Guy. 11.55 Family 11.30 Criminal The Scenes. 11.05
with a look at the top NCIS: Los Angeles. Summer Sizzlers. The Jeremy Kyle Rude Tube. 2.25 Guy. 12.40 Family Minds. 12.30 Penny Dreadful.
five singles from this 1.0 Hawaii Five-0. 9.30 21 Pop Songs Show USA. 12.55 Bodyshockers: Guy. 1.05 Family Criminal Minds. 12.15 Penny
week in 1989. ★★★★ 2.0 Hawaii Five-0. That Changed Our Teleshopping. 5.55 Nips, Tucks And Guy. 1.25 Killer 2.30 Grey’s Dreadful. 1.25
3.0 Hawaii Five-0. Lives. ITVBe Nightscreen. Tattoos. Magic. Anatomy. Penny Dreadful.
Channel 716 on Freeview
DAB (Digital radio)
www.heatworld.com
Watch TV with us on Twitter @heatworld
NEW The Big C

BBC1, 8.30pm
There was an excellent US
drama series called The Big C
a few years ago, about a woman
dealing with cancer, but this is
a new, one-off British drama
telling a similar story, but in
a very different style. It stars
the extraordinary Sheridan
Smith and is adapted from
Lisa Lynch’s book, based on
her popular blog, which was
Don’t
launched shortly after her get any
diagnosis in 2008. The film Velcro
begins with the that news she near my
has breast cancer, age 28, just arms
as she’s starting her marriage
to Pete (Paul Nicholls). How she
then deals with the cancer, and
decides to write her honest,
funny blog, is the main subject
of this impressive and powerful PICK OF
film, in which Smith shines. THE DAY
★★★★★ BOYD HILTON
BEST OF THE REST
Celebrity Squares NEW Home Fires NEW 8 Out Of 10 Cats

ITV, 7.15pm ITV, 9pm Does Countdown
Warwick Davis presents Set during WW2, this Channel 4, 9pm
the great big game of series boasts a good The combo of panel show NEW The Enfield Haunting
celebrity noughts and ensemble cast, led by and legendary afternoon Sky Living, 9pm
crosses, as two new Cranford’s Francesca game show has become Amateur paranormal investigator Maurice Gross
members of the public Annis and Downton’s one of the most purely (Timothy Spall) looks into curious goings-on in
compete to win the Samantha Bond. Backing enjoyable things on a north London council house in this classy three-
25 grand jackpot. This them up are Ruth TV. It’s back again for parter. It also stars Matthew Macfadyen and Juliet
week’s celebs in those Gemmell (Utopia), Mark a new run, and this Stevenson. ★★★★ BOYD HILTON
squares are Celeb BB Bonnar (Line Of Duty), first one features Sean
winner Julian Clary, Claire Rushbrook Lock and Bill Bailey The Simpsons
sex-baker Paul (Collision), and Ed going up against Sky1, 6.30pm
Flashbacks to Bart and
Hollywood, Corrie’s Stoppard (Cilla). The special guest captains
Lisa’s troublesome toddler
Hayley Tamaddon, top story follows a group of Sarah Millican and years and their first-ever
comic actress Doon women in a rural Cheshire Rob Delaney off the fight. ★★★★
Mackichan, rugby’s village community, who brilliant Catastrophe.
Ugo Monye, and stand- are dealing with the dark Actress Nina Conti
Keeping Up With
The Kardashians
ups Katherine Ryan shadow of the war in joins Susie Dent in E!, 9pm
and Paul Chowdhry. inspirational ways. Dictionary Corner. Kim is in Miami to promote
★★★ JASON ARNOPP ★★★★ JASON ARNOPP ★★★★ BOYD HILTON that bum-tastic Paper mag
cover shoot. ★★★★
Random Tatau
Or What! BBC3, 10pm
In the spooky drama, the
24-7 POP AND CELEBRITY NEWS! Mantracker trail of trouble that Kyle
CHANNEL364ONSKY
History, 6pm
and Budgie have left behind
CHANNEL338ONVIRGIN Not a tie-in with our
CHANNEL520ONFREESAT
catches up with them. ★★★
Hot Hunks, sadly.

6am Breakfast News. 7.30 Match Of The Day. 6am Life In A Cottage Garden With Carol Klein. 6am CITV. 8.25 News. 8.30 Weekend. 9.25 6.20am How I Met Your Mother. 6.45 How I Met 6am Milkshake! 10.0 Teenage Mutant Ninja
9.0 The Andrew Marr Show. 10.0 The Big 6.30 Great British Garden Revival. 7.30 Judge Rinder. 10.25 Judge Rinder. 11.25 Judge Your Mother. 7.10 Caterham Motorsports. 7.35 Turtles. 10.35 Cowboy Builders & Bodge Jobs.
Questions. 11.0 Sunday Politics. 12.15 MOTD2 Countryfile. 8.30 The Beechgrove Garden. 9.0 Rinder. 12.25 News; Weather. 12.35 Tipping Everybody Loves Raymond. 8.0 Everybody 11.25 Cowboy Builders & Bodge Jobs. 12.20
Extra. 1.0 News; Weather. 1.15 Bargain Hunt. The Football League Show. 10.10 Saturday Point. 1.30 Britain’s Got Talent. 2.45 FILM Loves Raymond. 8.30 Frasier. 9.0 Frasier. 9.30 Ultimate Police Interceptors. 1.20 FILM Blue
2.15 Escape To The Country. 3.15 Pets – Wild At Kitchen Best Bites. 11.40 Back In Time For Dragnet (1987) ★★ Spoof crime drama with Dan Sunday Brunch. 12.30 George Clarke’s Amazing Streak (1999) ★★★ Comedy with Martin
Heart. 4.15 Points Of View. 4.30 Songs Of Dinner. 12.40 Alex Polizzi: Chefs On Trial. 1.40 Aykroyd and Tom Hanks. 4.50 All Star Family Spaces. 1.30 Channel 4 Racing. 4.0 A Place In Lawrence. 3.05 FILM Zathura: A Space
Praise – School Choir Of The Year. 5.15 James Martin’s Food Map Of Britain. 2.0 Live Fortunes. 5.50 Ninja Warrior UK. The Sun: Home Or Away. 5.0 News. 5.20 FILM Adventure (2005) ★★★★ Family sci-fi
Pointless Celebrities. Snooker: The World Championship. The Karate Kid (2010) ★★★ Martial arts drama adventure with Josh Hutcherson and Jonah
with Jaden Smith and Jackie Chan. Bobo. 5.0 FILM Holes (2003) ★★★ Family
adventure with Shia LaBeouf.
Countryfile, 6.30pm W1A, 11pm Sunday Night…, 8pm Immigrant’s Guide…, 10.05pm Resident Evil: Afterlife, 9pm
6.05 News 6.0 Flog It! 6.50 ITV News London 7.05 News
From Alnwick castle
6.20 BBC Regional in Northumberland. 7.0 News; Weather 7.10 FILM Legally
News; Weather (R) Blonde
7.15 PICK Celebrity (2001) ★★★★
6.30 Countryfile Squares Comedy with Reese
The team explores SEE TODAY’S PICKS. Witherspoon.
the effects of spring 7.0 Live Snooker: 8.0 For The Love
on the senses. The World 8.0 Sunday Night At Of Cars
Championship The Palladium A VW Golf GTi Mk 1 is
7.30 Antiques Hazel Irvine presents New series. With Olly transformed into a
Roadshow all the action from Murs, Madness, Alfie rally car.
A visit to the second session of Boe, Jo Brand, Men in
Kelvingrove Art the final at Coats and Olate
Gallery and Museum Sheffield’s Crucible Dogs.
in Glasgow. Theatre, where a 9.0 PICK 8 Out Of 10 9.0 FILM Resident
further nine frames 9.0 PICK Home Fires Cats Does Evil: Afterlife
8.30 PICK The C Word are scheduled to take New series. Drama Countdown (2010) ★★ Zombie-
Drama with place. Subsequent about a group of WI New series. With fighting heroine
Sheridan Smith. programmes subject members during the Sarah Millican, Bill Alice’s search for
SEE TODAY’S to change. WWII. Bailey, Rob Delaney human survivors
PICKS. SEE TODAY’S PICKS. and Paul Foot. leads her into a
SEE TODAY’S PICKS. deadly trap. Action
10.05 News; Weather horror sequel with
10.05 An Immigrant’s Milla Jovovich, Ali
10.20 Perspectives: Guide To Britain Larter and
Rick Wakeman Wentworth Miller.
On Vivaldi’s 10.35 Gogglebox
Four Seasons The households’
10.0 News The prog rock opinions on recent
keyboardist explores TV shows. (R)
10.30 Match Of The the story of the
Day 2 famous classical
Including highlights piece.
of Tottenham
Hotspur vs
Manchester City.
11.35 The Football League Show. 12.15 11.0 W1A. 11.30 FILM The Accidental 11.20 Churchill: 100 Days That Saved 11.40 Bill Bailey Qualmpeddler. 12.40 11.05 FILM Gamer (2009) ★★ Sci-fi
Weather For The Week Ahead. 12.20 Husband (2008) ★★ Romcom with Uma Britain. 12.15 The Store. 2.30 Motorsport FILM 12 Rounds (2009) ★★ Action thriller with Gerard Butler. 12.45 Jackass.
News. Thurman and Colin Firth. 12.50 Sign Zone. UK. 3.20 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA. thriller with John Cena. 2.35 Alan Carr: 1.15 SuperCasino. 3.10 GPs: Behind Closed
2.50 This Is BBC2. 4.05 Nightscreen. 5.05 The Jeremy Chatty Man. 3.30 FILM Ashad Ka Ek Din Doors. 4.0 House Doctor. 4.25 Make It
Kyle Show. (1971, b/w) ★★★ Drama with Arun Khop- Big. 4.50 Make It Big. 5.15 Angels Of
kar. 5.35 The Common Denominator. Jarm. 5.40 Roary The Racing Car.
● STV As Main ITV except: 12.35pm Countrywise. 1.0 Jak & Eddie’s Scottish Kitchen. 12.15 The Nightshift. 5.0 Nightscreen. ● BBC1 N Ireland As BBC1 except: 5.15pm Election 2015 –
REGIONAL VARIATIONS The Interviews. 5.45 Getaways. 11.35 Sunday Politics. 12.15 The Football League Show. ● BBC1 Scotland As BBC1 except: 2.15pm Pets – Wild At Heart. 3.15 Pointless Celebrities. 4.05
Points Of View. 4.20 Songs Of Praise – School Choir Of The Year. 5.05 Antiques Roadshow. 7.30 The Leaders’ Debate. 10.30 Sportscene. 11.30 Match Of The Day 2. 12.35 The Football League Show. 1.10 Weather For The Week Ahead. ●
BBC2 Scotland As BBC2 except: 12.40pm River City. 6.0 Scotland’s VE Day: Countdown To Victory. ● S4C 6am Cyw. 8.50 Penblwyddi Cyw. 8.55 Pen-Blwydd Pwy? 9.0 Gwyl Y Geni: Tsieina. 10.0 Arfordir Cymru: Môn. 10.30 Dal Ati: Bore
Da. 11.30 Dal Ati: Dal Ati: Perthyn. 12.30 Rygbi Pawb. 12.45 Rygbi. 3.0 Rygbi. 5.15 Rygbi. 7.45 Newyddion S4C A’r Tywydd. 8.0 Huw Edwards A’r Cymry Estron – Stori Cymry Llundain. 9.0 Pum Cynnig I Gymro. 10.0 100 Lle. 10.30 Y Ty
Cymreig. 11.0 Côr Cymru Cynradd 2015.
SKY
RADIO PICK
SKY1 HEAT TV ITVBE E4 BBC3 SKY LIVING
Including at 6pm Including at 5pm Including at Including at 6pm Including at 7pm Including at 6pm
ATLANTIC
The Simpsons. Ladies’ Night! 9.30 6pm The Real The Big Bang Live Diving. 8.05 The Face Australia. Including at 6pm
Jarvis Cocker’s 6.30 PICK The The Only Way Is Housewives Of Theory. 6.30 The FILM Indiana 7.0 Who’d Be A Blue Bloods. 7.0
Sunday Service Simpsons. 7.0 The Pop! 10.0 Heat Up Atlanta. 7.0 Big Bang Theory. Jones And The Billionaire. 8.0 Blue Bloods. 8.0
(6 Music, 4pm) Simpsons. 7.30 The Your Weekend! 1.0 Vanderpump 7.0 The Big Bang Kingdom Of The Elementary. Blue Bloods. 9.0
As part of the BBC’s Cue Simpsons. 8.0 The Keep Calm-And Rules. 8.0 Dinner Theory. 7.30 The Crystal Skull 9.0 PICK The Game Of Thrones.
Sheffield festival, one of Simpsons. 8.30 Play Pop! Date. 9.0 The Big Bang Theory. (2008) ★★★ Enfield Haunting. 10.10 Penny
the city’s most famous The Simpsons. Real Housewives 8.0 FILM St 10.0 PICK Tatau. 10.0 Bones. 11.0 Dreadful. 11.20
sons, Jarvis Cocker, will 9.0 Hawaii Five-0.
4MUSIC Of Beverly Hills. Trinian’s (2007) 10.45 Family Guy. Criminal Minds. Penny Dreadful.
broadcast this show live 10.0 NCIS: Los Including at 10.0 Mob Wives. ★★★ 10.0 The 11.30 American 1.0 Hannibal. 2.0 12.30 Silicon
from Sheffield’s Winter Angeles. 11.0 NCIS: 4pm UK Hot 40. 11.0 Millionaire IT Crowd. 10.30 Dad! 11.55 Family CSI: Crime Scene Valley. 1.0 Nurse
Gardens. And, in an unlikely Los Angeles. 12.0 7.0 Videocrush: Matchmaker. 11.55 The IT Crowd. 11.0 Guy. 12.15 Tatau. Investigation. 3.0 Jackie. 1.30 Nurse
combo, is joined by music Hawaii Five-0. 1.0 Rate, Rant, Review. The Jeremy Kyle The Inbetweeners. 1.0 Teen Model Border Security: Jackie. 2.0 Game
lover and snooker icon, Hawaii Five-0. 8.0 Keeping Show USA. 12.50 11.35 The Factory: Reggie Canada’s Front Of Thrones. 3.0
Steve Davis. ★★★★ 2.0 Danny Dyer’s Up With The Teleshopping. 5.50 Inbetweeners. Yates’ Extreme Line. 4.20 The Nurse Jackie. 3.30
Deadliest Men. Kardashians. ITVBe Nightscreen. 12.10 Rude Tube. Russia. Real A&E. Nurse Jackie.
DAB (Digital radio)
www.heatworld.com
Game Of Thrones/
Thronecast
Sky Atlantic, 9pm/10.35pm
Strange things continue to
happen in the House of Black There’s no
and White where Arya (Maisie shampoo
Williams) is holed up, causing in Westeros
her hair to look all greasy and
lifeless. Stranger things are
happening with those dastardly
religious types the Sparrows,
headed by Jonathan Pryce’s
creepy High Sparrow, who’s
getting even friendlier with
Cersei. As for Margaery (who
has the ear of Cersei’s son King
Tommen, what with being
married to him and all), she’s
also playing a dangerous game.
Over in Meereen, home of
dragon queen Daenerys, she
makes some, um, questionable
tactical decisions. Don’t forget PICK OF
fan show Thronecast, too. THE DAY
★★★★★ BOYD HILTON
BEST OF THE REST
NEW How The Safe House NEW The Stranger

Other Half Eat ITV, 9pm On The Bridge
Channel 4, 7.30pm The Blackwell family Channel 4, 9pm
This show has a similar are pretending to be This deeply moving Modern Family
format to Supersize Vs holidaymakers, while documentary tells the Sky1, 8pm
Superskinny, focusing staying at the guest story of Jonny Benjamin, Haley whisks her sister Alex off to a music festival
on a food-based lifestyle house of former detective who went to Waterloo and they start bonding instead of the usual
swap. Each week, we’ll Robert (Christopher Bridge on 14 January bickering. Meanwhile, Phil reluctantly deals with
meet two families who Eccleston), which is 2008 with the intention ageing after watching Luke outperform him at the
live within a stone’s throw actually a safe house. of killing himself. “banjonic and trampolitan arts”. ★★★★ BOYD HILTON
of each other, but have But it’s increasingly clear A stranger saw him,
very different incomes. that a man is hunting stopped and managed Made In Chelsea
So, once the two families his “guests”– especially to talk him down. Jonny E4, 9pm
The latest shenanigans with
swap food budgets, how since son Sam (James ended up in hospital
the (mostly) loveable poshos
will they cope with eating Burrows) has gone without knowing the as Binky spots JP at the
new stuff? They must missing. The police are identity of his good rugger. Exciting. ★★★★
also swap how and when looking into it, but Robert samaritan. Six years
they eat, which could has his investigative hat later, he tried to find him.
Virtually Famous
E4, 10pm
be bad news for fussy on, as this gripping This is the incredible story Kevin McHale hosts the panel
eaters or health nuts. series continues. of what happened next. show about online stuff, with
★★★★ JASON ARNOPP ★★★★ JASON ARNOPP ★★★★★ BOYD HILTON guests including Rylan Clark,
and Rob Beckett. ★★★
Random Silicon Valley

Or What! Sky Atlantic, 10pm
Richard is courted by
24-7 POP AND CELEBRITY NEWS! World’s Creepiest Killers a wealthy new backer,
CHANNEL364ONSKY
Nat Geo Wild, 3am
and Monica is forced
CHANNEL338ONVIRGIN Giant snakes at three
CHANNEL520ONFREESAT
to deal with Laurie. ★★★★
in the morning? No thanks.

6am Breakfast News. 9.0 The Housing 6.05am Homes Under The Hammer. 7.05 6am Good Morning Britain. 8.30 Lorraine. 9.25 6am Countdown. 6.45 Will & Grace. 7.10 Will & 6am Milkshake! 9.15 The Wright Stuff. 11.30
Enforcers. 9.45 Homes Under The Hammer. FILM Odette (1950, b/w) ★★★ Fact-based Murder, She Wrote. 10.30 FILM Columbo: Grace. 7.35 Everybody Loves Raymond. 8.0 Cowboy Builders & Bodge Jobs. 12.25 News.
10.45 Don’t Get Done, Get Dom. 11.30 Oxford WWII drama with Anna Neagle. 9.0 Victoria Identity Crisis (1975) ★★★★ Crime drama with Everybody Loves Raymond. 8.30 Frasier. 9.0 12.30 Sick Note Skivers Exposed. 1.30
Street Revealed. 12.0 Bargain Hunt. 1.0 News. Derbyshire. 11.0 News. 11.30 News. 12.0 Daily Peter Falk and Patrick McGoohan. 12.25 The Frasier. 9.30 The Simpsons. 10.0 The Simpsons. Neighbours. 2.0 Rosamunde Pilcher: The Other
1.30 Land Girls. 2.15 Escape To The Country. Politics. 1.0 How We Won The War. 1.30 How We Unforgettable Pat Phoenix. 1.0 News; Weather. 10.30 Come Dine With Me. 11.0 Come Dine With Wife. 5.30 Neighbours. 6.0 The Gadget Show.
3.0 Decimate. 3.45 Flog It! 4.40 Pets – Wild At Won The War. 2.0 Live Snooker: The World 1.10 ITV News London; Weather. 1.15 Me. 11.30 Come Dine With Me. 12.0 Come Dine 6.55 Party Election Broadcast.
Heart. 5.40 Pointless. 6.25 News. 6.45 BBC Championship. 6.0 Party Election Broadcast. Catchphrase Celebrity Special. 2.0 Judge With Me. 12.35 Come Dine With Me. 1.05 A Place
Regional News. 6.55 Party Election Broadcast. 6.05 Vintage Antiques Roadshow. 6.30 Rinder. 3.0 Dickinson’s Real Deal. 4.0 Tipping In The Sun: Summer Sun. 2.10 Countdown. 3.0
Eggheads. Point. 5.0 The Paul O’Grady Show. 6.0 Off Their Deal Or No Deal. 4.0 Posh Pawnbrokers. 5.0
Rockers. 6.25 Party Election Broadcast. 6.30 Couples Come Dine With Me. 6.0 The Simpsons.
ITV News London. 6.45 News; Weather. 6.30 Hollyoaks.
VE Day…, 8.30pm Wastemen, 11pm Emmerdale, 7pm Food Unwrapped, 8pm Person Of Interest, 10pm
7.0 The One Show 7.0 Live Snooker: 7.0 Emmerdale 7.0 News 7.0 World’s Busiest
The World Laurel lashes out Hotel
7.30 Wallace & Championship at Marlon. 7.25 Party Election The Venetian Palazzo
Gromit: The Coverage of the Broadcast complex in Las
Wrong Trousers concluding session of 7.30 Coronation Street Vegas. (R)
The duo fall foul of this year’s final at the David leaves 7.30 PICK How The
a penguin. (R) Crucible Theatre in Weatherfield. Other Half Eat
Sheffield, where the SEE TODAY’S PICKS. 8.0 Police
8.0 EastEnders successful player 8.0 Wild Ireland Interceptors
Dot’s case takes a needs to reach 18 The Cliffs of Moher 8.0 Food Unwrapped A drink-driver
turn for the worse. frames to lift the and a sailing lesson. A look back at Kate damages one of the
famous trophy. Quilton’s trip to team’s favourite
8.30 VE Day: Subsequent 8.30 Coronation Street Malaysia. cars. (R)
Remembering programmes subject Callum calls David.
Victory to change.
Famous names 9.0 PICK Safe House 9.0 PICK The 9.0 Gotham
including Johnny Michael has a Stranger On Bruce tries to track
Ball, Honor breakthrough in his The Bridge down the man who
Blackman and Una hunt for the A man is reunited attacked Alfred.
Stubbs share their Blackwells. with the stranger
memories of VE Day. SEE TODAY’S PICKS. who saved his life.
SEE TODAY’S PICKS.
10.0 News 10.0 News; Weather 10.0 Person Of Interest
10.0 Ballot Monkeys Carter tries to
10.35 Have I Got 10.10 ITV News London Polling day looms on protect Laskey.
A Bit More the campaign buses.
News For You 10.15 The Agenda 10.55 FILM Lord Of War
Hosted by Alexander 10.30 Jimmy Carr: (2005) ★★★ A New
Armstrong. (R) 10.55 Slow Train Making People York criminal gains
11.0 Wastemen Through Africa Laugh access to a vast
11.20 The Graham Workers dealing with With Griff Rhys The comedian supply of Soviet
Norton Show the refuse produced Jones performs in weaponry and
With Kit Harington, by the people of The comedian takes Glasgow. (R) becomes one of
Matt LeBlanc, Rebel Newcastle upon in the sights of the world’s most
Wilson and Mumford Tyne. (R) Victoria Falls. (R) 11.35 The Island With notorious arms
& Sons. (R) Bear Grylls dealers. Thriller with
11.55 The Unforgettable The men build a Nicolas Cage and
Larry Grayson (R) makeshift raft. (R) Ethan Hawke.
12.10 News. 12.0 Sign Zone. 2.45 This Is BBC2. 4.0 12.20 Jackpot247. 3.0 UEFA Champions 12.35 The Secret Millionaire. 1.35 1.15 SuperCasino. 3.10 The Classic Car
Learning Zone. League Weekly. 3.25 Nightscreen. 5.05 24 Hours In A&E. 2.30 Supersize Vs Show. 4.0 Michaela’s Wild Challenge. 4.25
The Jeremy Kyle Show. Superskinny. 3.30 Sarah Beeny’s Selling Great Scientists. 4.45 House Doctor. 5.10
Houses. 4.25 Double Your House For Half House Doctor. 5.35 House Doctor.
The Money. 5.20 River Cottage Bites.
5.30 Jamie’s Comfort Food.
● ITV WALES As Main ITV except: 8pm Adrian’s Election Adventure. 10.55 Sharp End: Election 2015. ● STV As Main ITV except: 8pm The Lost Supper. 10.55 Corfu: A Tale Of Two Islands.
REGIONAL VARIATIONS 11.25 Gary Barlow & Friends. 12.25 The Nightshift. 3.25 The Nightshift. 5.0 Nightscreen. ● BBC1 N Ireland As BBC1 except: 6.50pm Party Election Broadcast. 11.20 The Arts Show.
11.50 The Graham Norton Show. ● BBC1 Scotland As BBC1 except: 11.15pm The Graham Norton Show. 12.0 Weather For The Week Ahead. ● BBC1 Wales As BBC1 except: 7.30pm X-Ray Election Special. ● S4C 7am Cyw. 1.0 Heno. 2.0
Prynhawn Da. 2.55 Newyddion S4C A’r Tywydd. 3.0 Tir Cymru. 4.0 Awr Fawr. 5.0 Stwnsh. 6.0 Pobol Y Cwm. 6.25 Newyddion S4C A’r Tywydd. 6.30 Sgorio. 7.0 Heno. 8.0 Pobol Y Cwm. 8.25 Cefn Gwlad. 8.55 Darllediad Etholiadol Gan Y
Ceidwadwyr Cymreig. 9.0 Newyddion 9 A’r Tywydd. 9.15 Ffermio. 9.45 Rygbi. 10.45 Rygbi.
SKY
RADIO PICK
Including at 6pm Including at Including at 6pm Including at 6pm Including at 7pm Including at
ATLANTIC
Ken Bruce (Radio 2, 9.30am) Futurama. 6.30 3pm Big Bank Dinner Date. Big Bang Theory: FILM Bedtime 5.50pm Nothing Including at
Ahead of the 2015 World The Simpsons. 7.0 Holiday Pop 7.0 Millionaire Star Wars Day Stories (2008) To Declare. 6.20 6pm House. 7.0
Snooker Championship The Simpsons. Party 100. 11.0 Matchmaker. 8.0 May The Fourth ★★★ 8.30 Nothing To Declare. Blue Bloods. 8.0
at the Crucible Theatre 7.30 The The Heat Is On! Dinner Date. With Be With You. 7.0 Sherlock. 10.0 6.50 My Kitchen Without A Trace.
in Sheffield, former Simpsons. 8.0 1.0 Keep Calm- Sara from Port Hollyoaks. 7.30 EastEnders. 10.30 Rules: Australia. 9.0 PICK Game
Frankie Goes To Hollywood PICK Modern And Play Pop! Talbot. 9.0 The The Goldbergs. Family Guy. 11.15 8.0 The Biggest Of Thrones. 10.0
Family. 8.30 Real Housewives 8.0 Revenge. American Dad! Loser USA. 9.0 PICK Silicon
frontman Holly Johnson,
Driving School Of
4MUSIC Of Orange County. 9.0 PICK Made 11.40 Family Guy. Criminal Minds. Valley. 10.35
The Shires and Rebecca
Ferguson join Ken and Mum And Dad. 9.0 Including at 7pm 10.0 Kendra On In Chelsea. 10.0 12.0 Killer Magic. 10.0 Stalker. 11.0 PICK Thronecast.
play live at the Sheffield An Idiot Abroad 2. Keeping Up With Top. 10.30 Kendra PICK Virtually 12.30 Russell CSI: Crime Scene 11.10 Last Week
Winter Garden. Plus 10.0 Hawaii Five-0. The Kardashians. On Top. 11.0 Mob Famous. 10.55 Howard’s Good Investigation. Tonight With John
chats with snooker 11.0 Hawaii Five-0. 7.30 The 57th Wives. 11.55 Big The Big Bang News. 1.0 Meth And 12.0 Bones. 1.0 Oliver. 11.45 The
stars. Woohoo! ★★★★ 12.0 Hawaii Five-0. Grammy Awards. Rich Texas. 12.55 Theory. 11.55 Rude Madness In Mexico: Elementary. 1.50 Newsroom. 1.0
1.0 NCIS: Los 10.0 Anger Teleshopping. 5.55 Tube. 1.0 Brooklyn Stacey Dooley CSI: Crime Scene Boardwalk Empire.
Angeles. Management. ITVBe Nightscreen. Nine-Nine. Investigates. Investigation. 2.15 The Sopranos.
DAB (Digital radio)
www.heatworld.com
NEW No Offence
Channel 4, 9pm
Paul “Shameless” Abbott
returns to the Channel 4 drama
scene with this bold new eight-
part series set in a crumbling
police station, where the
cops are seemingly oºrdinary
people just like you and me.
Except they have to investigate
thorny cases like that of a Where’s my
serial killer who is attacking pint of lager
vulnerable young women. It’s and a packet
fascinating to watch Abbott of crisps?
introduce believable yet funny
characters, played by a fine
cast led by Joanna Scanlan
(The Thick Of It), Elaine Cassidy
(The Paradise) and Alexandra
Roach (Utopia), along with Will
Mellor (pictured), and boss
Colin Salmon, while grappling
with the disturbing murder PICK OF
plot. It’s certainly unusual and THE DAY
intriguing. ★★★★ BOYD HILTON
BEST OF THE REST
Kirstie And Phil’s NEW Educating NEW Penny Dreadful

Love It Or List It Joey Essex: General Sky Atlantic, 10pm
Channel 4, 8pm Election What Hot Josh Hartnett,
Meet Emma and Nigel You Saying? ex-Bond Timothy Dalton Empire
Forde, and their three ITV2, 9pm and former Bond girl Eva E4, 9pm
boys James, William and What better way to Green return for series Continuing the splendid US drama set in the world
Laurence, who have lived celebrate the imminent two of the scary, stylish of hip-hop and rap, as music by one of Lucious’
in their Essex house for election in two days’ and sexy chiller set in leading artists is blamed for inspiring a shooting
seven years. But after time than this one-off Victorian London and incident. Can his ex-wife Cookie turn the crisis
a distressing encounter documentary fronted by filled with monsters and into a triumph? ★★★★★ BOYD HILTON
with a dodgy bathroom Joey Essex, in which he supernatural entities,
fitter, the home is sliding “gets in touch with the like vampires and Critical
into ruin. Nigel thinks they hottest topics in politics, Frankenstein’s creature. Sky1, 9pm
The team tackle one of
should sell up. But Emma in an effort to understand In this opener, Vanessa
their trickiest cases, a man
wants to refurbish. Kirstie the issues that affect (Green) is disturbed by who has been perforated
Allsopp encourages her, people of his generation”. occult images, while by crane spikes. ★★★★★
while Phil Spencer finds We’ve seen the pics of Ethan (Hartnett) decides
some viable replacement him with Ed Miliband, Nick to leave London. But can
Geordie Shore
MTV, 10pm
homes to buy. Will they Clegg and Nigel Farage Dr Frankenstein bring There will be nudity. And
love it or list it? (page 34), now watch the Brona back to life? shagging. And swearing.
★★★★ BOYD HILTON show. ★★★ LIAM WRIGHT ★★★★ LIAM WRIGHT And all-round naughty
behaviour. And crying. ★★★
Random NEW Nick Helm’s

Or What! Heavy Entertainment
20 Animals BBC3, 10.30pm
24-7 POP AND CELEBRITY NEWS! That Will Kill You The wry comedian and
CHANNEL364ONSKY star of BBC3’s Uncle gets
CHANNEL338ONVIRGIN Nat Geo Wild, 9pm
CHANNEL520ONFREESAT
his own show. ★★★★
Oh great, thanks for this.

6am Breakfast News. 9.15 The Housing 6am Homes Under The Hammer. 7.0 Don’t Get 6am Good Morning Britain. 8.30 Lorraine. 9.25 6am Countdown. 6.45 Will & Grace. 7.10 Will & 6am Milkshake! 9.15 The Wright Stuff. 11.45
Enforcers. 10.0 Homes Under The Hammer. Done, Get Dom. 7.45 Oxford Street Revealed. The Jeremy Kyle Show. 10.30 This Morning. Grace. 7.35 Everybody Loves Raymond. 8.0 Cowboy Builders & Bodge Jobs. 12.40 News.
11.0 Don’t Get Done, Get Dom. 11.45 Oxford 8.15 Sign Zone: Collectaholics. 9.15 Victoria 10.55 News; Weather. 11.0 This Morning. 12.30 Everybody Loves Raymond. 8.30 Frasier. 9.0 12.45 The Nightmare Neighbour Next Door. 1.45
Street Revealed. 12.15 Bargain Hunt. 1.0 News; Derbyshire. 11.0 News. 11.30 News. 12.0 Daily Loose Women. 1.30 News; Weather. 1.55 ITV Frasier. 9.25 Undercover Boss. 10.30 Come Neighbours. 2.15 NCIS. 3.15 FILM Left To Die
Weather. 1.45 Doctors. 2.15 Land Girls. 3.0 Politics. 1.0 How We Won The War. 1.30 How We News London; Weather. 2.0 Judge Rinder. 3.0 Dine With Me. 11.0 Come Dine With Me. 11.30 (2012) ★★★ Fact-based prison drama with
Decimate. 3.45 Escape To The Country. 4.30 Won The War. 2.0 Daily Politics: Welfare Debate. Dickinson’s Real Deal. 3.59 ITV London Weather. Come Dine With Me. 12.0 News; Weather. 12.05 Barbara Hershey and Rachael Leigh Cook. 5.0
Flog It! 5.15 Pointless. 6.0 News. 6.30 BBC 3.0 The Super League Show. 3.45 Are You 4.0 Tipping Point. 5.0 The Paul O’Grady Show. Come Dine With Me. 12.35 Come Dine With Me. News. 5.30 Neighbours. 6.0 Car Crash TV. 6.30
Regional News. 6.55 Party Election Broadcast. Being Served? 4.15 ’Allo ’Allo! 4.45 Just Good 6.0 ITV News London. 6.25 Party Election 1.05 A Place In The Sun: Winter Sun. 2.10 News. 6.55 Party Election Broadcast.
Friends. 5.15 Vintage Antiques Roadshow. 5.55 Broadcast. 6.30 News; Weather. Countdown. 3.0 Deal Or No Deal. 4.0 Posh
Party Election Broadcast. 6.0 Eggheads. 6.30 Pawnbrokers. 5.0 Couples Come Dine With Me.
Escape To The Continent. 6.0 The Simpsons. 6.30 Hollyoaks.
EastEnders, 7.30pm Inside The Factory…, 8pm The Paul O’Grady Show, 5pm Ballot Monkeys, 10pm Britain’s Horror Homes, 8pm
7.0 The One Show 7.0 Coast Australia 7.0 Emmerdale 7.0 News 7.0 Police
The team explores Dan makes a sacrifice Interceptors
7.30 EastEnders Norfolk Island. for Amelia. 7.55 Party Election A Christmas party
Sonia invites Martin Broadcast becomes a full-blown
to her birthday party 7.50 Nature’s Weirdest 7.30 Live UEFA A campaign outline riot. (R)
to please daughter Events (R) Champions by a political party.
Bex. League
8.0 Inside The A semi-final first leg 8.0 PICK Kirstie And 8.0 Britain’s Horror
8.0 Holby City Factory: How Our (kick-off 7.45pm). Phil’s Love It Or Homes
Two familiar faces Favourite Foods Mark Pougatch List It A street that is
return to work at Are Made introduces this An Essex home subjected to a tide
Holby. New series. The evening’s fixture, with a long list of of raw sewage every
production of three as Europe’s leading maintenance jobs. time it rains.
household staples, club competition SEE TODAY’S PICKS.
beginning with bread. moves a step closer
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The Past 9.0 Wastemen New series. Police Rocked Britain
The celebrities work The value of waste comedy drama by Headline-making
at a recreated materials. Paul Abbott. events.
Victorian rural SEE TODAY’S PICKS.
coaching inn.
10.0 News 10.0 Later Live – With 10.0 News; Weather 10.0 Ballot Monkeys
Jools Holland The campaign buses
10.50 Del Boys & With FFS, Alabama 10.30 ITV News London are in the grip of fear.
Dealers Shakes and Tobias
Danny struggles to Jesso Jr. 10.40 UEFA Champions 10.30 8 Out Of 10 Cats
sell a stuffed League: Extra Does Countdown
Newfoundland 10.30 Newsnight Time With Sarah Millican,
caribou head. (R) The opening Bill Bailey, Rob 11.0 FILM Far
11.30 Weather semi-final first leg. Delaney, Paul Foot And Away
and Nina Conti. (R) (1992) ★★★
11.35 The NI Leaders’ 11.30 Benidorm Romantic period
11.50 FILM Texas Debate Kelly’s mother Sylvia 11.35 The Island With drama with Tom
Rangers Noel Thompson hosts arrives to sort out Bear Grylls Cruise and Nicole
(2001) ★★ Western a debate between Mateo. (R) Lauren, Beth and Kidman.
starring James Van party leaders from Belinda set animal
Der Beek. Northern Ireland. traps. (R)
1.15 News. 12.50 Sign Zone. 3.20 This Is BBC2. 4.0 12.0 Jackpot247. 3.0 Loose Women. 3.45 12.30 Poker. 1.25 KOTV Boxing Weekly. 1.40 SuperCasino. 3.10 The Body In
Learning Zone. Nightscreen. 5.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show. 1.50 Challenge Dubai. 2.45 Caterham The Freezer: Countdown To Murder. 4.0
Motorsports. 3.10 Shameless USA. 4.10 Michaela’s Wild Challenge. 4.25 Great
Sarah Beeny’s Selling Houses. 5.05 Scientists. 4.45 House Doctor. 5.10 House
Double Your House For Half The Money. Doctor. 5.35 House Doctor.
● STV As Main ITV except: 11.05pm UEFA Champions League: Extra Time. 11.55 Benidorm. 12.20 The Nightshift. 5.0 Nightscreen. ● BBC1 N Ireland As BBC1 except: 8pm The NI Leaders’
REGIONAL VARIATIONS Debate. 9.15 The NI Leaders’ Debate: Reaction. 9.55 Your Weather Covered. 10.50 Holby City. 11.50 24 Hours In The Past. 12.50 Del Boys & Dealers. ● BBC1 Scotland As BBC1 except:
7.25pm Party Election Broadcast. 8.0 River City. 10.45 Holby City. 11.45 The NI Leaders’ Debate. 1.0 FILM Texas Rangers (2001) ★★ 2.20 Weather For The Week Ahead. ● BBC2 N Ireland As BBC2 except: 11.35pm Stormont Today. 12.05
The NI Leaders’ Debate. ● BBC2 Scotland As BBC2 except: 9pm How Scotland Works. 10.30 Scotland 2015. 11.0 Newsnight. 12.0 Wastemen. 1.0 This Is BBC2. ● BBC2 Wales As BBC2 except: 3pm Coast. 3.20 Am.pm. 4.10 The Super League
Show. 4.55 Are You Being Served? 5.25 ’Allo ’Allo! ● S4C 7am Cyw. 1.0 Newyddion. 1.05 Heno. 2.0 Prynhawn Da. 2.55 Newyddion. 3.0 Cartrefi Cefn Gwlad Cymru. 4.0 Awr Fawr. 5.0 Stwnsh. 6.0 Pobol Y Cwm. 6.25 Newyddion. 6.30
Ralïo+. 7.0 Heno. 7.30 Rownd A Rownd. 8.0 Pobol Y Cwm. 8.25 O’r Galon: Teulu. 8.55 Darllediad Etholiadol Gan Llafur Cymru. 9.0 Newyddion. 9.30 Milwyr Y Welsh Guards. 10.0 Hacio. 11.0 Pum Cynnig I Gymro. 12.05 Y Dydd Yn Y Cynulliad.
SKY
RADIO PICK
Including at 6pm Including at 5pm Including at 6pm Including at 6pm Including at Including at
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Futurama. 6.30 The Only Way Is Dinner Date. The Big Bang 7pm Top Gear. 5.55pm Nothing Including at 6pm
Barbara Windsor’s The Simpsons. 7.0 Pop! 7.0 Boybands 7.0 Millionaire Theory. 7.0 8.0 Don’t Tell To Declare. 6.25 House. 7.0 Blue
East End Men The Simpsons. Through The Years! Matchmaker. 8.0 Hollyoaks. 7.30 The Bride. 9.0 It’s Love, Actually. Bloods. 8.0 Without
(Radio 2, 10pm) 7.30 The 8.0 The Changing Seven Days With. The Goldbergs. Cocaine Capital 6.40 My Kitchen A Trace. 9.0 The
The series in which Babs Simpsons. 8.0 Faces Of JT. 9.0 9.0 Millionaire 8.0 Brooklyn Nine- Of The World: Rules: Australia. Following. 10.0
Windsor celebrates the The Flash. 9.0 Cheekiest Vids. Matchmaker. Nine. 8.30 The Big Stacey Dooley 8.0 Who’d Be A PICK Penny
lives and careers of the PICK Critical. 10.0 Millionaire Bang Theory. 9.0 Investigates. Billionaire. 9.0 Dreadful. 11.10
biggest names in popular 10.0 Forever. 11.0
4MUSIC Matchmaker. 11.0 PICK Empire. 10.0 EastEnders. Elementary. 10.0 Game Of Thrones.
entertainment from the Hawaii Five-0. 12.0 Including at 6pm Kendra On Top. 10.0 Supernatural. 10.30 PICK The Blacklist. 11.0 12.10 Thronecast.
worlds of music, comedy Hawaii Five-0. 1.0 Justin Bieber: 12.0 Big Rich Texas: 11.0 The Big Bang Nick Helm’s Heavy Madam Secretary. 12.45 Ray
and movies, who were Hawaii Five-0. Superfan Quiz! Whitney’s Having A Theory. 11.30 Entertainment. 12.0 Bones. 1.0 Donovan. 1.55 The
born in the East End. 2.0 NCIS: Los 6.30 UKHot40: Baby. 12.30 Big Rich The Big Bang 11.0 Family Guy. Elementary. 1.50 Sopranos. 3.10
This week: singer Tony Angeles. 3.0 NCIS: The Top 20. 8.0 Texas: Whitney’s Theory. 12.0 Rude 11.45 American CSI: Crime Scene Vegas. 4.0 Stargate
Newley. ★★★★ Los Angeles. 4.0 Keeping Up With Having A Baby. Tube: Heroes And Dad! 12.10 Family Investigation. 3.30 SG-1. 5.0 Star Trek:
Hawaii Five-0. The Kardashians. 12.55 Teleshopping. Villains. Guy. Grey’s Anatomy. Enterprise.
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NEW Murder
In Successville
BBC3, 10pm
We previewed this series last
week and called it the craziest
TV concept of the year. But fear
not – because once you actually
watch it, you’ll soon work out
what’s going on and end up
highly amused and entertained.
It’s a bit like one of those
murder mystery weekends,
but set in a fictional town where This is
all the inhabitants are famous more
celebs (played by a fine gaggle
realistic
than Made
of comics and impressionists), In Chelsea
and where the lead detective is
a total doof called DI Sleet (the
very funny Tom Davis). He’s
joined each week by a real celeb
– this week Made In Chelsea’s
Jamie Laing – who acts as
his sidekick in trying to solve PICK OF
a patently ludicrous crime. THE DAY
★★★★ BOYD HILTON
BEST OF THE REST
The Island With Peter Kay’s The Delivery Man

Bear Grylls Car Share ITV, 9.30pm
Channel 4, 9pm BBC1, 9.30pm Admittedly it does take
The ladies’ island is It’s the third episode a bit of a mental flip to Jane The Virgin
proving to be much more of the joyous comedy see Darren Boyd – who E4, 9pm
gripping to watch than co-written, starring and was so effective as the In the great US comedy-drama, Jane ponders
the blokes’ one, and directed by Peter Kay, intensely creepy feeder making a big decision about her relationship
in a week when there’s about two people thrown in Fortitude – playing with Michael and continues to question whether
only one visit (due to together after they have a sympathetic copper- Petra will be a fit mother, while Alba tries to stop
tomorrow’s election), it’s to share a ride to work. turned-midwife, but give Rogelio seeing Jane. ★★★★★ BOYD HILTON
quite right that the series This week, Kayleigh it a go. You might just like
focuses on the women (Sian Gibson) is running it. This week a reality star Bones
as they approach the late, but John (Kay) is shows up in disguise, Sky Living, 9pm
The death of a famous chef
four-week mark of the determined to get to work asking Matthew to hide
forces Brennan and Booth to
experiment. The ten on time. That’s about all her pregnancy from the investigate their favourite
remaining ladies feast the plot you need. Just paps. With no help from restaurant. ★★★★
on a pig, which is nice sit back and enjoy the Tash and her Facebook
for them, but one of the lovely dialogue, and accounting. Also stars
The Royals
E!, 9pm
group’s two precious brilliant use of a Magic Fay Ripley, Aisling Bea Preposterous but fun
water cans is jettisoned. FM-style radio station. and Paddy McGuinness. dramz with the fictional
★★★★ LIAM WRIGHT ★★★★ BOYD HILTON ★★★★ CHRIS LONGRIDGE royal family doing all
kinds of tawdry stuff. ★★★
Random Grey’s Anatomy

Or What! Sky Living, 10pm
Derek witnesses a nasty car
24-7 POP AND CELEBRITY NEWS! 1000 Ways To Die accident and springs into
CHANNEL364ONSKY
H2, 10pm
action in an attempt to save
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the victims’ lives. ★★★★
keep us entertained.

11.0 Don’t Get Done, Get Dom. 11.45 Oxford 8.15 Sign Zone: See Hear. 8.45 Sign Zone: An 10.55 News; Weather. 11.0 This Morning. 12.30 Everybody Loves Raymond. 8.30 Frasier. 8.55 12.45 The Hotel Inspector. 1.45 Neighbours.
Street Revealed. 12.15 Bargain Hunt. 1.0 News; Island Parish: Falklands. 9.15 Victoria Loose Women. 1.30 News; Weather. 1.55 ITV Frasier. 9.25 Undercover Boss. 10.25 Come 2.15 NCIS: New Orleans. 3.10 FILM Deadly
Weather. 1.45 Doctors. 2.15 Land Girls. 3.0 Derbyshire. 11.0 News. 11.30 News. 12.0 Daily News London; Weather. 2.0 Judge Rinder. 3.0 Dine With Me. 10.55 Come Dine With Me. 11.25 Honeymoon (2010) ★★★ Mystery with Zoe
Decimate. 3.45 Escape To The Country. 4.30 Politics. 1.0 How We Won The War. 1.30 How We Dickinson’s Real Deal. 3.59 ITV London Weather. Come Dine With Me. 11.55 News; Weather. 12.0 McLellan. 5.0 News. 5.30 Neighbours. 6.0 Car
Flog It! 5.15 Pointless. 6.0 News. 6.30 BBC Won The War. 2.0 Daily Politics: Trust In Politics 4.0 Tipping Point. 5.0 The Paul O’Grady Show. Come Dine With Me. 12.30 Come Dine With Me. Crash TV. 6.30 News.
Regional News. Debate. 3.0 Charlton Heston: Talking Pictures. 6.0 ITV News London. 6.30 News; Weather. 1.0 A Place In The Sun: Winter Sun. 2.0 Channel 4
3.40 Are You Being Served? 4.10 ’Allo ’Allo! Racing. 4.0 Posh Pawnbrokers. 5.0 Couples
4.45 Just Good Friends. 5.15 Vintage Antiques Come Dine With Me. 6.0 The Simpsons. 6.30
Roadshow. 6.0 Eggheads. 6.30 Escape To The Hollyoaks.
Continent.
Inspector George Gently, 8pm Charlie Brooker’s…, 9pm Give A Pet A Home, 8pm The Restoration Man…, 8pm Autopsy: The Last Hours…, 9pm
7.0 The One Show 7.0 Coast Australia 7.0 Emmerdale 7.0 News 7.0 GPs: Behind
Hosted by Matt Neil Oliver presents Closed Doors
Baker and Alex an exploration of 7.30 Coronation Street Dr Ferdinand has to
Jones. Australia’s coastline. Gail returns from her break the news of a
honeymoon to find woman’s dementia to
7.50 Nature’s Weirdest No 8 in chaos. her children. (R)
Events (R)
8.0 Inspector George 8.0 Give A Pet 8.0 The Restoration 8.0 The Nightmare
Gently 8.0 Inside The A Home Man: Best Builds Neighbour Next
A woman’s body is Factory: How Our Amanda Holden George Clarke looks Door
found on the moors. Favourite Foods reveals which back at four dramatic A former soldier
Are Made animals have found tower conversions. takes the law into his
The production and a new home. own hands. Last in
history of chocolate. the series.
9.0 Charlie Brooker’s 9.0 Newzoids 9.0 PICK The Island 9.0 Autopsy: The Last
Election Wipe The puppets poke fun With Bear Grylls Hours Of River
The broadcaster at politicians. The entire challenge Phoenix
9.30 PICK Peter Kay’s offers a satirical look comes under threat The events
Car Share at the General 9.30 PICK The Delivery for the women. surrounding the
SEE TODAY’S Election campaign. Man SEE TODAY’S PICKS. actor’s death. Last in
PICKS. SEE TODAY’S PICKS. the series.
10.0 QI
10.0 News With Sara Pascoe, 10.0 News; Weather 10.0 Ballot Monkeys 10.0 CSI: Trilogy
Jack Whitehall and Last in the series. – Part One
10.50 A Question Adam Hills. (R) 10.30 ITV News London The team discovers
Of Sport 10.30 Bugsplat! the severed leg. (R)
With Kelly Sotherton 10.30 Newsnight 10.40 Unforgettable Comedy following
and Shane Williams. Election a team of RAF pilots. 10.55 CSI: Trilogy
11.15 Weather Moments: – Part Two
11.20 FILM A Few 60 Years On 11.0 Bodyshockers: Ray Langston visits
Best Men 11.20 Sign Zone My Tattoo Hell New York to join
(2011) ★★ Comedy With voiceover. (R) 11.40 Corfu: A Tale Katie Piper explores forces with Mac’s
with Xavier Samuel. Of Two Islands the craze for body unit. (R)
11.50 Wastemen A hotel manager modification. (R)
The value of waste feels the impact 11.50 CSI: Trilogy
materials. (R) of the economic – Part Three (R)
downturn. (R)
12.55 News. 12.50 Sign Zone. 3.05 This Is BBC2. 4.0 12.05 Jackpot247. 3.0 The Jeremy Kyle 12.0 The Stranger On The Bridge. 1.0 12.45 True Crimes: The First 72 Hours.
Learning Zone. Show USA. 3.40 Nightscreen. 5.05 The Embarrassing Bodies Down Under. 1.55 1.15 SuperCasino. 3.10 Person Of Interest.
Jeremy Kyle Show. Burger Bar To Gourmet Star. 2.50 FILM 4.0 Michaela’s Wild Challenge. 4.25 Great
Adam (2009) ★★★ 4.30 Unreported Scientists. 4.45 House Doctor. 5.10 House
World. 4.55 River Cottage Bites. 5.05 Doctor. 5.35 House Doctor.
Sarah Beeny’s Selling Houses.
● ITV WALES As Main ITV except: 11.40pm Wild Ireland. ● STV As Main ITV except: 10pm ITV News At Ten. 11.05 Unforgettable Election Moments: 60 Years On. 12.05 The Nightshift.
REGIONAL VARIATIONS 5.0 Nightscreen. ● BBC1 Scotland As BBC1 except: 7.30pm A Question Of Sport. 10.45 Del Boys & Dealers. 11.45 A Question Of Sport. 12.15 FILM A Few Best Men (2011) ★★ Comedy
with Xavier Samuel. 1.45 Weather For The Week Ahead. ● BBC2 Scotland As BBC2 except: 3pm Politics Scotland. 10.30 Scotland 2015. 11.0 Newsnight. 11.45 Weather. 11.50 Sign Zone. ● S4C 7am Cyw. 1.0 Newyddion S4C A’r Tywydd.
1.05 Heno. 1.30 3 Lle. 2.0 Prynhawn Da. 2.55 Newyddion S4C A’r Tywydd. 3.0 Huw Edwards A’r Cymry Estron Stori Cymry Llundain. 4.0 Awr Fawr. 5.0 Stwnsh. 6.0 Pobol Y Cwm. 6.25 Newyddion S4C A’r Tywydd. 6.30 Celwydd Noeth.
7.0 Heno. 7.30 Iolo Dros Y Ffin. 8.0 Y Glas. 8.30 Jude Cisse: Y Wag O Fon. 9.0 Newyddion 9 A’r Tywydd. 9.30 Y Sgwrs. 10.0 Huw Edwards A’r Cymry Estron – Stori Cymry Llundain. 11.0 Prosiect: Peredur Ap Gwynedd. 12.05 Y Dydd Yn Y
Cynulliad.
RADIO PICK SKY1

Including at 6pm
HEAT TV
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ITVBE
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E4
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BBC3
Including at 7pm
SKY LIVING
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ATLANTIC
The Official Chart Update Futurama. 6.30 5pm The Pop Dinner Date. The Big Bang Top Gear. 7.55 5.55pm Nothing Including at
(Radio 1, 3.30pm) The Simpsons. 7.0 Powerlist 2015: Top 7.0 Millionaire Theory. 7.0 FILM Pirates Of To Declare. 6.25 6pm House. 7.0
Matt Edmondson and Clara The Simpsons. 20. 7.0 Atomic Matchmaker. 8.0 Hollyoaks. 7.30 The Caribbean: It’s Love, Actually. Blue Bloods. 8.0
Amfo bring us a sneak 7.30 The Kitten’s Ladies’ Dinner Date. 9.0 The Goldbergs. On Stranger Tides 6.40 My Kitchen Without A Trace.
preview of the week’s Simpsons. 8.0 Night! 9.0 Heat’s Botched. 10.0 Mob 8.0 The Big Bang (2011) ★★ 10.0 Rules: Australia. 9.0 Blue Bloods.
new entries. ★★★ An Idiot Abroad Guilty Pop Hits. Wives. 11.0 The Theory. 8.30 The PICK Murder In 8.0 NY Med. 9.0 10.0 Phil Spector
2. 9.0 A League Real Housewives Of Big Bang Theory. Successville. 10.35 PICK Bones. 11.50 Penny
Lost In Music: The Nile Of Their Own.
4MUSIC New Jersey. 12.0 9.0 PICK Jane Family Guy. 10.55 10.0 PICK Dreadful. 1.0 Mad
Rodgers Story (Radio 2, 10pm) 10.0 A League Of Including at 6pm Big Rich Texas: The Virgin. 10.0 Family Guy. 11.15 Grey’s Anatomy. Men. 2.0 The
Simon Le Bon out of Their Own. 11.0 Videocrush Does Whitney’s Having FILM Jennifer’s American Dad! 11.0 Bones. 12.0 Jinx: The Life And
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two of his profile of the Futurama. 12.0 7.0 10 Hits We Big Rich Texas: ★★★ 12.05 12.0 Murder In CSI: Crime Scene Durst. 2.55 Treme.
musician, producer and NCIS: Los Angeles. Can’t Turn Off! 8.0 Whitney’s Having Virtually Famous. Successville. 12.30 Investigation. 4.10 Stargate SG-1.
guitarist. ★★★★ 1.0 Hawaii Five-0. Keeping Up With A Baby. 12.55 12.55 Made In Nick Helm’s Heavy 1.50 Bones. 5.05 Star Trek:
2.0 Hawaii Five-0. The Kardashians. Teleshopping. Chelsea. Entertainment. 2.40 Scandal. Enterprise.
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Channel 4’s Alternative

Election Night/
General Election 2015
Channel 4, 9pm/
BBC1 & ITV, 9.55pm
It’s time to see what will happen
when the results come after the
polling booths close at 10pm Do you
in what will undoubtedly be think
the closest General Election
I should’ve
shaved?
in years. You have the choice
of Channel 4’s fun-sounding
“Alternative” coverage, which
will run all night, hosted by
Jeremy Paxman and David
Mitchell and featuring Richard
Bit late
Osman, Adam Hills and Kayvan
now
Novak, with election-themed
editions of Gogglebox and The
Last Leg. Or you could stick
with the traditional pure news
offerings of BBC1 and ITV.
Actually, that Paxman/Mitchell
idea does sound tempting...
★★★★ BOYD HILTON
BEST OF THE REST
PICK OF
THE DAY
NEW The Vote The Game W1A
More4, 8.25pm BBC2, 9pm BBC2, 10pm
Before the results Tom Mallory (Steven Writer/director John
coverage starts in Mackintosh) is working Morton has done Madam Secretary/Scandal
earnest, here’s for both the Ministry Of a brilliant job of making Sky Living, 9pm/10pm
a maverick new play Defence and the KGB. this second series of the Excellent US drama double bill, kicking off with
broadcast live from Daddy (Brian Cox) and his comedy set inside the Elizabeth dragging Henry into an international
London’s Donmar team must find Mallory, BBC’s higher echelons negotiation in Madam Secretary. Then, in Scandal,
Warehouse. It’s set in turn him and stop him feel just as funny as the Olivia helps a congressman whose father is on
a fictional polling station before he blabs secret first, yet with added new death row. ★★★★★ BOYD HILTON
during the final 90 info and leaves the UK depths of insight into
minutes before the polls vulnerable to nuclear its characters. Such Mad Men
close – ie right now, as attack. Joe Lambe (Tom is the case this week in Sky Atlantic, 10pm
Only a few more episodes
you’re watching. The star- Hughes), though, isn’t particular, as new Head
to go in the awesome US
studded cast includes entirely focused on the of Better, Anna (Sarah advertising drama. How will
Catherine Tate, Mark job, being haunted by the Parish), has to give a big we cope without it? ★★★★★
Gatiss and Nina Sosanya past. Can he put aside speech at a big launch
as the staff of the polling his vendetta against his event, masterminded by
The Good Wife
More4, 10pm
station, plus Judi Dench lover’s killer, or will he the ludicrous Siobhan The firm takes on the
and Fisayo Akinade. mess up this mission? (Jessica Hynes). case of a man paralysed by
★★★★ BOYD HILTON ★★★★ JASON ARNOPP ★★★★★ BOYD HILTON a malfunctioning gun made
using a 3D printer. ★★★★★
Random Celebrity Juice

Or What! ITV2, 10pm
Keith Lemon gets Holly
24-7 POP AND CELEBRITY NEWS! Sex Sent Me To The ER Willoughbooby, Fearne
CHANNEL364ONSKY
TLC, 10pm
Cotton and guests to do
CHANNEL338ONVIRGIN And on General
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outrageous stuff. ★★★★
Election night, too.

11.0 Don’t Get Done, Get Dom. 11.45 Oxford 8.15 Sign Zone: Great British Garden Revival. 10.55 News; Weather. 11.0 This Morning. 12.30 Everybody Loves Raymond. 8.30 Frasier. 8.55 12.45 Secrets Of Great British Castles. 1.45
Street Revealed. 12.15 Bargain Hunt. 1.0 News; 9.15 Victoria Derbyshire. 11.0 News. 11.30 News. Loose Women. 1.30 News; Weather. 1.55 ITV Frasier. 9.25 Undercover Boss. 10.25 Come Neighbours. 2.15 NCIS. 3.10 FILM Do No Harm
Weather. 1.45 Doctors. 2.15 Land Girls. 3.0 12.0 Spitfire Women. 1.0 How We Won The War. News London; Weather. 2.0 Judge Rinder. 3.0 Dine With Me. 10.55 Come Dine With Me. 11.25 (2012) ★★ Thriller with Deanna Russo. 5.0
Decimate. 3.45 Escape To The Country. 4.30 1.30 How We Won The War. 2.0 FILM The Dickinson’s Real Deal. 3.59 ITV London Weather. Come Dine With Me. 11.55 News; Weather. 12.0 News. 5.30 Neighbours. 6.0 Car Crash TV. 6.30
Flog It! 5.15 Pointless. 6.0 News. 6.30 BBC Wooden Horse (1950, b/w) ★★★ Fact-based 4.0 Tipping Point. 5.0 The Paul O’Grady Show. Come Dine With Me. 12.30 Come Dine With Me. News.
Regional News. WWII drama with Leo Genn. 3.40 Are You Being 6.0 ITV News London. 6.30 News; Weather. 1.0 A Place In The Sun: Winter Sun. 2.0 Channel 4
Served? 4.10 ’Allo ’Allo! 4.45 Just Good Friends. Racing. 4.0 Posh Pawnbrokers. 5.0 Couples
5.15 Vintage Antiques Roadshow. 6.0 Come Dine With Me. 6.0 The Simpsons. 6.30
Eggheads. 6.30 Escape To The Continent. Hollyoaks.
Shark, 8.55pm Kinky Boots, 10.30pm Eat Fat, Stay Fit?…, 7.30pm The Last Leg…, 9.30pm The Hotel Inspector, 9pm
7.0 The One Show 7.0 Coast Australia 7.0 Emmerdale 7.0 News 7.0 World War II
Topical stories from Neil Oliver presents Cain gives Laurel In Colour
around the UK. an exploration of an ultimatum. The story of the
Australia’s coastline. global conflict,
7.30 EastEnders 7.30 Eat Fat, Stay beginning with its
Lady Luck shines on 7.50 Nature’s Weirdest Fit?: Tonight origins. (R)
one Walford couple. Events (R)
8.0 The World’s 8.0 The Last Days
8.0 Watchdog At 30 8.0 Inside The 8.0 Emmerdale Most Extreme Of Jesus Christ
Celebrating three Factory: How Our Marlon tells Laurel The ten most The downfall and
decades of the Favourite Foods to get out of his life. extraordinary legacy of significant
consumer Are Made railways in the world. historical figures.
investigation show. The history of milk. 8.30 You’ve Been
Last in the series. Framed! (R)
8.55 Shark
New series. The 9.0 PICK The Game 9.0 Fraud Squad 9.0 PICK Channel 4’s 9.0 The Hotel
behaviour of the The MI5 team tries to Detectives Alternative Inspector
ocean predators. track down an MoD investigate a gang Election Night Alex Polizzi visits a
employee who is a dealing in counterfeit SEE TODAY’S PICKS. Port Talbot B&B in
Soviet sleeper agent. cheques. desperate need of
SEE TODAY’S PICKS. 9.30 The Last Leg help.
9.55 PICK Election 9.55 PICK Election Alternative
2015 10.0 PICK W1A 2015 Election Special 10.0 Stephen King’s
David Dimbleby Anna is crowned as Tom Bradby presents Bag Of Bones
presents coverage the Head of Better. live through-the- 10.0 Gogglebox A recently widowed
of the General SEE TODAY’S PICKS. night coverage of the Alternative novelist is plagued by
Election results, General Election Election Special disturbing dreams,
joined by a team of 10.30 FILM Kinky Boots results with reports The armchair critics’ ghostly visitations
correspondents to (2005) ★★★ across the nation and take on the election. and messages from
talk to the winners Comedy drama with expert analysis from beyond the grave.
and losers and offer Chiwetel Ejiofor. Colin Rallings and 11.0 Paxman And Mystery horror with
the inside track on Jane Green. Mitchell: More Pierce Brosnan. (R)
their thinking. SEE TODAY’S PICKS. Alternative
SEE TODAY’S Election Night
PICKS. Jeremy Paxman
questions leading
politicians as early
results come in.
12.15 Sign Zone. 3.0 This Is BBC2. 4.0 12.0 Alternative Election Night: The 1.10 SuperCasino. 3.10 Secrets Of Great
Learning Zone. Results. British Castles. 4.0 Michaela’s Wild
Challenge. 4.25 Great Scientists. 4.45
House Doctor. 5.10 House Doctor. 5.35
House Doctor.
● STV As Main ITV except: 9.55pm The General Election 2015. ● BBC1 Scotland As BBC1 except: 9.55pm Election 2015: Scotland. ● BBC1 Wales As BBC1 except: 9.55pm Election 2015
REGIONAL VARIATIONS Wales. ● BBC2 N Ireland As BBC2 except: 10.30pm Election 2015. ● BBC2 Scotland As BBC2 except: 6.30pm Coast Australia. 7.20 Nature’s Weirdest Events. 7.30 The Beechgrove
Garden. 10.30 Election 2015. ● BBC2 Wales As BBC2 except: 10.30pm Election 2015. ● S4C 7am Cyw. 1.0 Newyddion S4C A’r Tywydd. 1.05 Heno. 1.30 Cefn Gwlad. 2.0 Prynhawn Da. 2.55 Newyddion S4C A’r Tywydd. 3.0 Cofio:
Gwersylloedd Yr Urdd. 4.0 Awr Fawr. 5.0 Stwnsh. 6.0 Becws. 6.25 Newyddion S4C A’r Tywydd. 6.30 Sion A Siân. 7.0 Heno. 7.30 Rownd A Rownd. 8.0 Pobol Y Cwm. 8.25 Munud I Fynd. 9.0 Newyddion 9 A’r Tywydd. 9.30 Cadw Cwmni
Gyda John Hardy. 10.0 Etholiad 2015.
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Best Behaviour Futurama. 6.30 Hottest Hunks Top Dinner Date. 7am E4 Closed 7pm Top Gear. 5.55pm Nothing Including at 6pm
(Radio 4, 6.30pm) The Simpsons. 7.0 50. 10.30 The Only 7.0 Millionaire For Voting. 7.0 8.0 Don’t Tell To Declare. 6.25 House. 7.0 Without
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comedy panel show on the 7.30 The The Heat Is On! 1.0 8.0 The Real The Goldbergs. Russell Howard’s 6.40 My Kitchen Bloods. 9.0 The
etiquette rules of modern Simpsons. 8.0 Keep Calm-And Housewives Of 8.0 2 Broke Girls. Good News. 9.30 Rules: Australia. Jinx: The Life And
life, with guests Clive Arrow. 9.0 Forever. Play Pop! Beverly Hills. 9.0 8.30 The Big Russell Howard’s 8.0 The Face Deaths Of Robert
10.0 Modern Vanderpump Rules. Bang Theory. 9.0 Good News. 10.0 Australia. 9.0 Durst. 10.0 PICK
Anderson, Sarah Millican
Family. 10.30
4MUSIC 10.0 The Real Brooklyn Nine- EastEnders. 10.30 PICK Madam Mad Men. 11.0
and Joe Lycett. ★★★★
Modern Family. Including at 6pm Housewives Of Nine. 9.30 Marry Family Guy. 10.55 Secretary. 10.0 Treme. 12.30 Last
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Modern Family. Take New York. Teleshopping. Tube. Entertainment. Investigation. Stargate SG-1.
DAB (Digital radio)
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EastEnders
BBC1, 8pm
Oh no. As if national treasure
Dorothy Cotton-Branning being
in prison weren’t upsetting
enough, now she’s in the dock
facing a murder charge. And the
trial doesn’t start well when
all the evidence points towards
Dot’s guilt. Come on, this is Nick
Cotton we’re talking about,
surely no one even cares he’s
dead? Quite frankly, though,
haven’t those Walford coppers
got anything better to do than
prosecute a Bible-bashing
OAP? Hopefully, though, the
judge is an ’Enders fan and will
be lenient. Or even let Dot off
completely. She did, after all,
do the viewers a huge favour
by killing off her overacting
son and sparing us all from any PICK OF
more of his appalling. Use. Of. THE DAY
Phrasing. ★★★★★ JULIE EMERY
BEST OF THE REST
Coronation Street Weekend Escapes Gogglebox

ITV, 7.30pm & 8.30pm With Warwick Davis Channel 4, 9pm
As if David hadn’t already ITV, 8pm This is one of those rare
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hanging around, now his family would probably all year, so you could see Sky Movies Premiere, 8pm
sister Sarah’s “seeing” kill for a nice weekend at what these beloved Cameron Diaz and Jason Segel are a couple trying
him. So, with David being home. But no, they’re off armchair critics think to reignite the spark in their marriage by making
David, he decides to do on another of Warwick’s of everything. Sadly, a sexy video. Needless to say, it ends up going
a runner with Max and wacky escapes, this time tonight’s instalment more public than they hoped in this intermittently
Lily. But Max isn’t happy heading to Scotland. First marks the end of another amusing comedy. ★★★ BOYD HILTON
about being separated stop is the Edinburgh series. So we can only
from his biological dad Fringe Festival, where hope Gogglebox comes Relatively Clever
and runs away from David they meet various acts back very soon, while Sky1, 8pm
Mel Giedroyc welcomes
at the first opportunity and sample some fried making the most of
back the Clipston family
he gets. And guess who local food. Then it’s north favourites Leon and from Lancashire, and
returns from their to Inverness for some June, Steph and Dom, the Churches. ★★★
honeymoon just in time caber-tossing, before hairdressers Christopher
for more Platt-related dancing a cèilidh beside and Stephen and the
The Blacklist
Sky Living, 9pm
mayhem? Welcome back, Loch Ness. Maximum human dynamos that As Red (James Spader) fights
Gail and Les Dennis! Scottishness achieved. are Sandy and Sandra. for his life, he pleads with
★★★★ JULIE EMERY ★★★★ JASON ARNOPP ★★★★★ JASON ARNOPP Liz (Megan Boone) to trace
a dangerous man. ★★★★
Random The Trip To Italy

Or What! Gold, 11pm
Hilarious comedy with Steve
24-7 POP AND CELEBRITY NEWS! Tony Robinson’s
Coogan and Rob Brydon
CHANNEL364ONSKY
Victory In Europe
wining and dining in stunning
CHANNEL338ONVIRGIN Discovery, 9pm
CHANNEL520ONFREESAT
locations. ★★★★★
Quite a achievement for Tony.

6am Election 2015. 1.0 News; Regional News; 6.20am FILM The First Of The Few (1942, b/w) 6am Good Morning Britain Election Special. 6am Countdown. 6.45 Will & Grace. 7.10 Will & 6am Milkshake! 9.15 The Wright Stuff. 11.45
Weather. 2.45 VE Day 70: The Cenotaph. 3.30 ★★★ Wartime biopic, directed by and starring 9.25 News. 2.30 News. 3.30 News; Weather. Grace. 7.35 Everybody Loves Raymond. 8.0 Cowboy Builders & Bodge Jobs. 12.40 News.
Election 2015. 6.0 News. 6.30 BBC Regional Leslie Howard. 8.15 Sign Zone: Britain’s 4.0 Dickinson’s Real Deal. 5.0 The Paul O’Grady Everybody Loves Raymond. 8.30 Frasier. 8.55 12.45 Can’t Pay? We’ll Take It Away. 1.45
News. Favourite Foods – Are They Good For You? 9.15 Show. 6.0 ITV News London. 6.30 News; Frasier. 9.25 Undercover Boss. 10.25 Come Neighbours. 2.15 NCIS: Los Angeles. 3.15 FILM
The Housing Enforcers. 10.0 Homes Under The Weather. Dine With Me. 11.0 Come Dine With Me. 11.30 Shadow On The Mesa (2013) ★★★ Western with
Hammer. 11.0 Don’t Get Done, Get Dom. 11.45 Come Dine With Me. 12.0 Come Dine With Me. Wes Brown. 5.0 News. 5.30 Neighbours. 6.0 Car
Oxford Street Revealed. 12.15 Bargain Hunt. 1.0 12.30 News; Weather. 1.0 A Place In The Sun: Crash TV. 6.30 News.
Land Girls. 1.45 Doctors. 2.15 Escape To The Winter Sun. 2.0 Channel 4 Racing. 4.0 Posh
Country. 2.45 Election 2015. 3.30 Decimate. Pawnbrokers. 5.0 Couples Come Dine With Me.
4.15 Flog It! 5.15 Pointless. 6.0 Eggheads. 6.30 6.0 The Simpsons. 6.30 Hollyoaks.
Escape To The Continent.
Graham Norton…, 10.40pm Britain’s Greatest…, 9pm Slow Train Through…, 9pm Virtually Famous, 11.05pm NCIS: New Orleans, 9pm
7.0 The One Show 7.0 Iolo’s Great Welsh 7.0 Emmerdale 7.0 News 7.0 The Gadget Show
Parks Doug breaks down. Amy Williams
7.30 A Question New series. attempts to produce
Of Sport 7.30 PICK Coronation the ultimate
With Kelly Sotherton 7.30 VE Day – Street home cinema
and Shane Williams. Cenotaph SEE TODAY’S PICKS. experience. (R)
(R) Highlights
8.0 PICK Weekend 8.0 Marvel’s Agents 8.0 Secrets Of Great
8.0 PICK EastEnders 8.0 An Island Parish: Escapes With Of SHIELD British Castles
SEE TODAY’S Falklands Warwick Davis The story of May’s The history of
PICKS. Last in the series. SEE TODAY’S PICKS. transformation into Carrickfergus Castle
“The Cavalry” is in Co Antrim. Last in
8.30 Question Time 8.30 Gardeners’ World 8.30 PICK Coronation revealed. the series.
Election Special Horticultural ideas. Street
A debate on the SEE TODAY’S PICKS.
result of the 9.0 Britain’s Greatest 9.0 PICK Gogglebox 9.0 NCIS: New
election. Generation 9.0 Slow Train The households’ Orleans
Some of the last Through Africa opinions on recent The team works with
9.30 Have I Got surviving Britons With Griff Rhys TV. Last in the series. the Coast Guard
Election News who fought or lived Jones SEE TODAY’S PICKS. Investigative
For You through the WWII. Last in the series. Service.
Jo Brand hosts.
10.0 The Clare Balding 10.0 News; Weather 10.0 Alan Carr: 10.0 NCIS
10.0 News Show Chatty Man A stolen drone is
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10.40 The Graham Steph Houghton and and Clean Bandit. terrorist.
Norton Show Eniola Aluko. 10.50 FILM Dante’s Peak
Light-hearted chat (1997) ★★★ Disaster 10.55 Law & Order:
and music. 10.30 Newsnight movie with Pierce Special Victims
Brosnan. 11.05 Virtually Famous Unit
11.30 Weather With Rylan Clark, Rob A woman’s ex-
11.25 Peter Kay’s Beckett, Tom Davis boyfriend is
Car Share 11.35 Later – With and Sarah Callaghan. suspected of setting
Kayleigh is half- Jools Holland up an assault. (R)
drunk after a wild Extended edition. 11.55 Brooklyn Nine-
party the night With FFS, Alabama Nine 11.50 True Crimes: The
before. (R) Shakes and Tobias First 72 Hours (R)
Jesso Jr.
12.0 FILM Swingers (1996) ★★★★ 12.35 Sign Zone. 2.20 This Is BBC2. 12.50 Jackpot247. 3.0 The Jeremy Kyle 12.25 FILM MacGruber (2010) ★★ 12.15 SuperCasino. 3.10 Gotham. 4.0
Comedy with Jon Favreau and Vince Show USA. 3.40 Nightscreen. Action adventure spoof with Will Forte. Can’t Pay? We’ll Take It Away. 4.45 House
Vaughn. 1.35 News. 1.55 Shameless USA. 2.45 Double Your Doctor. 5.10 House Doctor. 5.35 House
House For Half The Money. 3.40 Sarah Doctor.
Beeny’s Selling Houses. 4.35 Deal Or No
Deal. 5.30 Kirstie’s Vintage Gems.
● ITV WALES As Main ITV except: 8pm Coast & Country. ● STV As Main ITV except: 9.25am News Election Special. 1.30 Election 2015 – Scotland. 2.0 News Election Special. 10.0
REGIONAL VARIATIONS News. 10.30 Scotland Tonight: Election Special. 11.05 FILM Out Of Sight (1998) ★★★★ Romantic crime drama with George Clooney and Jennifer Lopez. 1.10 The Nightshift. 5.0
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7.30pm Scrum V Live. 9.30 VE Day – Cenotaph Highlights. ● S4C 7am Cyw. 1.0 Newyddion S4C A’r Tywydd. 1.05 Heno. 1.30 Ffermio. 2.0 Prynhawn Da. 2.55 Newyddion S4C A’r Tywydd. 3.0 Am Ddrama. 4.0 Awr Fawr. 5.0 Stwnsh. 6.0
Pobol Y Cwm. 6.25 Newyddion A’r Tywydd. 6.30 Celwydd Noeth. 7.0 Heno. 8.0 Pobol Y Cwm. 8.25 Gwesty Parc Y Stradey. 9.0 Newyddion 9 A’r Tywydd. 10.0 Opera Gair Ar Gnawd: Y Perfformiad. 11.30 Munud I Fynd.
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Kermode & Mayo’s Film Futurama. 6.30 Club Heat: Dance Dinner Date. The Big Bang Great Movie Sun, Sea And A&E. Including at
Review (Radio 5 Live, 2pm) The Simpsons. 7.0 Hits. 10.30 The 7.0 Millionaire Theory. 7.0 Mistakes V: 7.0 My Kitchen 6pm House.
Mark and Simon survey The Simpsons. Only Way Is Pop! Matchmaker. Hollyoaks. 7.30 Revenge Of The Rules: Australia. 7.0 Without A
the week’s films, plus 7.30 The 11.0 The Heat Is 8.0 Millionaire The Goldbergs. Fifth. 7.15 Atlantis. 8.0 Bangkok Trace. 8.0 Blue
star interviews and Simpsons. 8.0 On! 1.0 Keep Calm- Matchmaker. 8.0 The Big Bang 8.0 Don’t Tell The Embassy. 8.30 Bloods. 9.0 Penny
such. ★★★★★ PICK Relatively And Play Pop! Patti helps an Theory. 8.30 Bride. 9.0 Live At Border Security: Dreadful. 10.10
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The Radio 2 Arts Show Trollied. 9.30
4MUSIC 9.0 The Bachelor Theory. 9.0 EastEnders. 10.30 Line. 9.0 PICK 10.45 Flight Of
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a look at the latest films, Hawaii Five-0. 1.0 6.30 UKHot40: 12.0 Big Rich Big Bang Theory. 12.0 Murder In 11.0 Bones. 1.0 Of Robert Durst.
plays, dance events, books Hawaii Five-0. 2.0 The Top 20. 8.0 Atlanta. 12.55 11.55 The Big Bang Successville. 12.30 Elementary. 1.50 12.20 Banshee.
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Claire’s
■ Jess Wright
Accessories
Willy straws at the ready, because it’s Michelle Keegan’s hen do! “Shell”
jetted off to Dubai with a big bunch of gals, including former Corrie co-star
had time to Brooke Vincent, future sister-in-law Jess Wright and someone known as
■ Fresh-faced, selfie, naturally
for now… “Big Bird”. Not a deely bopper or L-plate in sight. Yet…
GOOD
EAMONN & JAMES CLARKE; GC IMAGES; GETTYIMAGES.COM; REX FEATURES
WEEK FOR...
Extinction
Passed away millions of
years ago? Never mind.
You’ll probably get brought
back to life through the
magic of DNA imminently.
Yep, the second trailer for
Jurassic World came out last
BAD WEEK FOR...
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and amazing. Luckily, Chris CLICK
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a comforting sight after /jurassicworld Proof that no one wants to line the pockets of famous people who
to watch the trailer
seeing a genetically are richer than most of us will ever dream of being – Jay Z’s Tidal
modified dino on the loose. streaming service has crashed out of the iTunes top 700. Ouch.
BAD WEEK FOR… GOOD WEEK FOR…

Translation
Bringing back memories of that
Dating
time in sixth form when your mate If you’ve
got a Chinese tattoo saying “peace”, developed RSI
which actually said something like from swiping left
“semi-detached house”, Lindsay Lohan on Tinder because
tweeted some Arabic she thought you’re being
GOOD said, “You’re beautiful”. It actually

translated to “You’re a donkey”.
matched with
mingers, stay
SWIPING
WEEK FOR... She then insisted she’d known
what it meant all along. OK…
strong, becau
Leo DiCaprio
Having lots is on there. H

told mates at
Coachella ear
of money
Well done to Calvin Harris for not only being
this month
that he’s been
checking out
bloody gorgeous, but also having a big bank the ladies
balance. Calv’s entered the Sunday Times under the alia
Rich List for the first time ever, sitting on “Leonard”.
a nest egg of £70million – making him richer Change your
than Gary Barlow and Kylie Minogue. location settin
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Adèle Lang’s Leo 24 JUL - 23 AUG Sagittarius 23 NOV - 21 DEC
HOROSCOPES
This week, Mercury’s influence could Samuel L Jackson might be able
see both you and Joey Essex being to work for both money and love, but
a little too lavish with your cash. Before he’s not your average Sagittarian.
you make any major purchase, doyour Most of you will have to compromise.
sums first. If maths isn’t really yourbag, It’s a good idea to take any well-paid
then consider enlisting someonewith (but boring) offer in a bid to finance
a better head for figures. your future dream career.
Tuesday 28 April – Monday 4 May
Aries 21 MAR - 20 APR Virgo 24 AUG - 23 SEP Capricorn 22 DEC - 20 JAN
Even though you (and Russell Crowe) Neither you nor Pixie Geldof should While both you and Zooey Deschanel
are prone to impatience, Saturnsays be so selfless that you let your career are in urgent need of a decent break,
you shouldn’t try to force outcomesat suffer as a result. According to the astro-trends predict that isn’t likely
work. Not everything is to your liking Virgo chart, now is the time to focuson to happen any time soon. You can,
at present, but you’ll only make things work above all else. Loved ones won’t however, afford to take a day off from
worse if you keep trying to push other resent you. Indeed, they’ll be relieved work here and there. A caring employer
people into corners. Back off a bit. they’re not holding you back. will help. As will a parent or partner.
Taurus 21 APR - 21 MAY Libra 24 SEP - 23 OCT Aquarius 21 JAN - 19 FEB

This week’s lunar activity suggests Mars maintains you’ll rate long-term Lying low no longer holds great appeal
TMI-types like Charlotte Crosby will financial security over short-term to you or that other “shrinking violet”
have to be a lot more discreet. If a friend romantic passion this week. Unless Oliver Proudlock. This week, you’re
tells you something in confidence, it’s you’re loaded (like Sacha Baron more concerned about being in all the
important you don’t blab. The pleasure Cohen), a poverty-stricken paramour right places. Frenemies might be put
of spilling the beans will in no way won’t do. Yes, it’s a mite materialistic, out by your re-emergence, but they’ll
compensateforthepainyou’llcause. butwhat’sapoorLibranto do? know better than to kick up a big fuss…
HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Gemini 22 MAY - 21 JUN Scorpio 24 OCT - 22 NOV Pisces 20 FEB - 20 MAR
TUE Jessica Alba, 34, Theplanetssignalromanticblipsfor NowthattheMoonisinScorpio, both Less-than-stellar alignments could
Penélope Cruz, 41, Howard alltwin-types–evenloved-upsorts youandCaroline Flackwill be fullof make family affairs rather fractious.
Donald, 47, Vernon Kay, 41, suchasAidan Turner.Althougharow confidenceandreadytoembracefresh Nevertheless, you and your astro-peer
WED Kian Egan, 35, mayseemliketheendoftheworld, startswithgusto.Theonlysticking Eva Mendes should continue to play
itprobablywon’thavealong-lasting pointmightbeunfortunate asidesfrom peacekeeper. It’s a role you’re good at,
Uma Thurman, 45 negativeeffect.Thebrightsideisyou’ll naysayersinyourmidst.Don’t listen. and it’s one you secretly enjoy. Family
THU Kirsten Dunst, 33 havelotsofkissingandmakinguptodo. Instead,goall-outtoprovethemwrong. are relying on your calm intervention.
FRI Matt di Angelo, 28,
Joanna Lumley, 69,
Cancer 22 JUN - 23 JUL
CA RIUS
Jeremy Paxman, 65
AQ RN
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SUN Rob Brydon, 50, days.Indeed,it’llbehardtoattendall
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Christina Hendricks, 40 ofthem.Makeinvitesfromclosefriends Might be more SAT
fizzlethansizzle
MON Kate Garraway, 48, andfamilymembersyourpriority.
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SUN
Laura Whitmore, 30 Otherwiseyouriskamajorfeud. your thermals MON
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immediatefamiliesandanyoneelseconnectedwiththecreation andadministrationofthecompetition.Prizesarenon-transferable,non-negotiable To enter, cut out the coupon and send it to:
andnocashalternativeswillbeofferedandwereserve therighttosubstitutetheprizeforanotherprizeofequalvalue.Dependingonthenatureofthe heat Crossword 831, Endeavour House, 189 Shaftesbury
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JOINNOWTOPLAYFREEBINGOFOR28DAYSATHEATWORLDBINGO.COM
back page ■ Just don’t
touch him
Jack P
Shepherd
FILLS IN THE
BLANKS
heat starts the sentences and
Jack kindly finishes them…
This morning, I woke up…
to the sound of Fatty [aka
his son Reuben, 16 months]
crying. His nappy had leaked
everywhere, so I had to change
him and the cot – it wasn’t
a great start to the morning.
The funniest text I’ve ever
received was… from one of
those claims companies saying ■ Oh, hey, Jack’s
adorable son
I’d been in an accident and was Reuben
due compensation blah, blah,
blah… So I called them and
said, “Oh my God, that’s I don’t know who, I don’t know
terrible news. Was I OK, did why, but they had to die.
I break anything? How tragic.” When I look in the mirror,
They didn’t know what to say, I see… David Platt [his Corrie
it amused me for a few minutes. character], it’s uncanny! I’m
I’m not very good at… starting to see he’s getting a bit
football or any type
of ball sports. Kicking,
throwing, catching – in
older and that freaks me out.
My worst habit is… Candy
Crush – I’m obsessed with it.
“I don’t get
fact, anything sporty. It’s
just not for me, I don’t like
I play it in my sleep. Other than
killing people in Russia, it’s all hugging,
the physical nature of it all.
People at work would
say I’m… h tl b t
I think about in bed. People
were talking to me and I was
t hi th i th move,
it’s just
that’s not t
awkward c
and big lon
ying
sh.
only
weird”
the phone, ood
to keep pe st of months, so I did some research People don’t expect me to…
arm’s leng … it into this and it seems the only show emotion or to hug or
I keep hav ds to be food you could live on alone and touch. I don’t get hugging,
dreams mething be healthy is avocado, because it’s just weird. It’s a borderline
about… at will of all the good fats and vitamins. sexual thing. I don’t think it
that me eep me I mostly smell of… I always like should take place. ■
and Laure alive. If to smell nice. I particularly like
[Shippey, say Tom Ford, Chanel and, at the Coronation Street, Mondays,
GETTYIMAGES.COM
his fiancée h and minute, Christian Dior Homme. Wednesdays and Fridays,
■ Off to
had to go t Russia with ps, I’d My best friend thinks that ITV, various times. Vote for
Russia to k his fiancée? dead I’m… I haven’t got one. I don’t Jack at Britishsoapawards.tv
someone. six do best friends. until 15 May
98 WWW.H
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HEAT’S HOTTEST

On the cover Also this week StarStyle In every issue

SO MUCH MORE THAN JUST A MAGAZINE – BREATHE IN THE GOODNESS

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to Jay Z. He’s taken that on a business deal. They’re joint

current state of Jay Z and

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time he wore a sarong) and that

Erm, not a lot, and Sam

Why did Kim and

of them are going to read

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“Tequila anyone for presents? You’d better

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Yes, Boyband can

“What? Is this serious?” Adele and Amy Winehouse,

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old Kylie had

KYLIE’S KEEPING UP WITH obsessed – it’s been

THE KARD-ASS-IANS hooked up with

up with feeling like at the top of her surgery wish list.

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“Taylor usually comes in with It’s not just

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■ “I whip ■ That giant

WHAT? WHAT? Pattison? Geordies don’t wear

we did wonder. It’s not like

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The Only Way Is Westminster

FISHING WITH FARAGE

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PDA OFF! OFF!

MARNIE SIMPSON &

stars were all

over each other

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Seen a famous? Tweet us with your sightings! #Spotted

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BARRUECO JUDD since. (Except

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