My Son

Dad, flying on an airplane is fun, isn't it?" My son asked while playing with his
plane from left to right. I don't know what to answer at all. I started dropping my
fingers over the keys of my trusty typewriter when he asked.

"Yes... Maybe... Maybe it's good too," I answered casually while taking a deep drag
on the cigarette. And thinking about what other sentences to type on my prospective
short story paper.

"Father, you don't seem serious."

Oh my little child, he's only six years old, how can he talk like this, I thought.
Take everything seriously. So quickly he developed into a small creature who could
understand and pronounce many words. Have the lessons at school reached sentences
like: Budi went home to his grandmother's house by plane seriously. Or because he
watches too much television. He watched a lot of soap operas, cartoons and
celebrity life programs, then recorded everything the creatures in the glass said.
Ugh.

"Oh, Dad, you've never been on a plane either..." He said again, still with that
innocent expression.

"Why, my dear child," I said softly, then said, "why do you want to fly?" Just to
get away from the question.

"But Father promises first. Later, when Father has a lot of money, Ayi and Father
will both board the plane!"

"Yes, if you have a lot of money, Ayi wants to go wherever you want by plane,
Father will follow."

I know this is just to entertain Ayi. What can people get who are hit by cuts like
me. I bought severance pay for a typewriter, paid for the house contract and Ayi's
toy airplane. I'm just an amateur short story writer now. Even though none of my
works have been appreciated by the media just by publishing them, I will continue
to write. Besides, I submitted applications to foreign companies with offices along
Jalan Mulawarman. Who knows, one day I will become a short story writer who is also
a worker. So he's not just a short story writer

who is also a scholar in this world. "That's right, Dad!?" Ayi said. "Later Ayi can
get on a plane. It's fun!"

Ayi is so happy, I said to myself. I feel guilty if I will make his dream come
true. Ayi circled behind me playing with her toy airplanes.

After he was tired, he went to bed. It's late. I stopped my fingers dancing on the
keys. I'm afraid it will disturb his sleep. I just wrote the next sentences using a
pen first.

I haven't finished writing my short story this time, Ayi said from her deep sleep.

"Mother, Mother, wait for Ayi, Mother. Soon Ayi and Father will follow you on the
plane into the sky."

Ah, my son, he misses his mother so much. His mother died two years ago. And it
seems that I have been doing it wrong all this time because I always say that his
mother is now in the sky every time he asks.
Balikpapan, 25 November 2001- Create Titi