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She Loves To Watch Me Play I Know What You Re Doing One Revised Edition Zane Michaelson Jenna Michaelson Online Ebook Texxtbook Full Chapter PDF
She Loves To Watch Me Play I Know What You Re Doing One Revised Edition Zane Michaelson Jenna Michaelson Online Ebook Texxtbook Full Chapter PDF
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Copyright © 2022 by Junction Publishing (United Kingdom).
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You will read OUR version of events and what WE experienced that
led us to where WE are now.
We dedicate this book to marriage… it works for us… sometimes!
Re-visiting what was written almost five years ago was never in our
plans, especially since we were insistent the books were pulled from
sale in late 2020.
But you can never account for public taste, and to our surprise, our
publisher fielded request after request for copies of the titles,
individual or otherwise.
“Can you think about it, at least?” he asked. “They’re exactly the
type of books people want to read nowadays.”
“Yeah, I bet, there’s nothing like revelling in the misfortune of
others,” I replied in a contemptuous tone.
He isn’t one to give in easily. “Like I said, think about it, and if the
answer is a definite no, then fine, I’ll accept it.”
So, Jenna and I sat down and talked about the pros and cons and
despite the latter winning by a large majority, eventually we came
up with a compromise.
I called our publisher. “We will only support a re-release with new
artwork and in revised editions.”
But it didn’t take him long to come back to us. “Yes, okay,” he
quickly and sensibly agreed, knowing without us getting our way,
those titles would remain locked in the vaults, only to be seen by
those who had originally purchased them.
“Ugh…” I replied, not keen on his tone, or the fact he was blissfully
happy at what he thought was
The truth is, we are still wary about putting this past part of our lives
back into the public’s domain, but this time we (kind of) know what
to expect.
Last time the crazies and the self-proclaimed morally superior came
for us, and one lady (the term
Still, the shock from such vitriol taught us who to trust. Now, with
nearly five years behind us, we keep a careful distance, sticking to
the chosen few.
Anyway, back to the books… for those who read them the first time
around, if you dive into these new editions, you will notice things
missing that no longer feel appropriate to share, but there are other
things removed before their release we now wish for you to see.
Why?
Plus, we are much improved writers and can tell our story in a more
proficient manner.
Enjoy our words and try not to judge too harshly; this is our life, not
yours. No matter how far up in the air your noses may be, perfection
is unattainable.
With Love.
ZANE
Happily married to Jenna for many years, I still loved her with all my
heart. But I’d had nagging
doubts for a while, and the more I tried to ignore what was going
on, and thoughts I’d buried deep
Still, as you read this and the subsequent releases, I know you will
question my words.
I’d lost all interest in anything and everything, stopped going to the
gym, cycling with friends,
“I know you better than I know myself and something’s not right.”
I couldn’t give her an answer. Not because I didn’t want to, but
because I had no idea myself.
more I tried figuring them, and myself, out, the more the answers I
craved eluded me.
Not in the least bit religious, I sought solace in the most unlikely of
places—church. Once there, I sat silently praying to something I
didn’t believe in, anxious for clarity. To say I felt a total fraud was an
understatement because I hadn’t stepped foot inside a church for
many years, but rather than
Help me! I internally cried out, though I couldn’t find the strength to
voice it to the one person who could have steered me back toward
the right path—Jenna.
but one day, with what seemed like divine intervention, the reason
for my downward spiral suddenly
I looked closely at the small box on the screen and felt like I’d been
slammed head-first into the
wall.
The shock was instantaneous—after all these years that face stared
right through my soul. But with
me like a runaway train. And just like minutes rather than years had
passed, there he was, looking not one day older than he had the last
time I’d allowed my eyes to wander over his body.
Whispering his name over and over, my heart fluttered and for a
moment; time seemed to stand
still.
But me being me, I threw caution to the wind and clicked on his
profile picture anyway. Then, as
his world opened up to me, or as much as the privacy settings
allowed, the past flooded back in its entirety. Finally, for the first
time in months, clarity was mine.
away at me because the woman I’d married and vowed to love and
protect was downstairs feeding
our children. Still, I couldn’t deny that I felt something, which was
better than the nothingness of the last few months.
Jenna and I hadn’t been intimate for a while. It wasn’t because she
didn’t want sex. More the fact
I’d been struggling to get a hard on. But seeing Chad’s chiselled
features again, I felt my cock
pulsating.
in life was for people to swoon over him and bolster an already
gargantuan ego.
Having him around disturbed the peace and quiet I’d been craving,
and finally not having to listen
together. Sadly, not long after I left Oxford, we lost touch, and while
I had mixed emotions about it, life got in the way, as it often does.
Looking back, it was probably for the best, and the less complicated
of options, but what I
wouldn’t have given for just five minutes with him right then.
I couldn’t take my eyes off his picture and felt mesmerised all over
again.
When he walked into the room my nose was buried in a book, well
my Kindle.
pong of sweat.
“Hey, Buddy,” he said, in his sexy Californian drawl. His bag was
dropped onto the middle of
“You been holed up in here all mornin’?” I noted the twang to his
voice and how he always cut
“You need to get outside and enjoy the sunshine while you can—”
“Yeah!”
“I’ll get outta these clothes and have a shower. That gym was so
warm. You Brits need to invest in AC.”
I couldn’t help but notice how the material clung seductively to his
pecs. He must have really
room, but he was happy to drop stuff where he stood then step over
it.
“Yes, Mom.” He bent down to pick up his ruck sack and his blond
hair flopped into his face.
used his physicality as a weapon. I’d seen it so many times; the tilt
of his head, the stare of wanting eyes, the flexing of a bicep—all
tried and tested methods designed to intrigue and hook the object of
his attraction.
Whatever it was about him, I craved it, but ultimately, desired the
knowledge of what made him
tick.
Reeled in, I fought it. No matter how I coveted what he had to offer,
even though I was straight and had had more than my own share of
fun both on and off campus, overstepping the mark
wouldn’t be an issue because fear of what was and what could be,
held me in a tight grip.
down on the floor, rip his vest off and lick the sweat from his erect
nipples.
Well, that was until I gave the game completely away with a longing
stare he couldn’t fail to
miss.
“You’ve got a great body, mate,” I offered, hoping he would let the
matter drop. “I wish my
“You look pretty good, man.” There it was again, that smile.
He nodded. “Yeah, and a lot of British guys here seem to think so.”
He caught my eye again.
“Really?”
“Totally! I think most of the English guys on campus just like the
idea of sucking on a big
American dick.”
“Come on, dude, tell me what you really think. It’s just us two here
and it’ll go no further,
“Oi, don’t—”
“Is that the best you can do?” The patch of pre-cum oozing through
the thin material of the
shorts told him how horny I really was and seeing his cock straining
for freedom against his
He pulled his pants down and I swear I’ve never seen such a cock as
big as that, not even when
watching porn. Not that it mattered, not when all I wanted was to
taste it.
“How big is it?” I eyed it with curiosity, like I’d seen an animal
previously considered extinct.
“Big…”
still had a foreskin. But that wasn’t the best part—his cock was not
only long, but it had girth and was veiny too.
“If you want my big cock in your mouth, beg for it.”
I didn’t care for his analysis of the moment, but that’s all it was. A
moment when hormones
surged through my body and all sense and reason was overtaken by
the desire to simply fuck.
“Come on, you fucker. You can do much better than that. Tell me, or
I’ll go find a pussy to stick it in. Beg for it…”
“Please, sir. I want your cock.” I’d never been submissive in my life
and felt self-conscious.
What if this is some sort of colossal wind-up and I’d made a right
idiot of myself?
I wasn’t expecting it, but he used his cock as a weapon and slapped
it across my face. Its weight was unexpected as was the force
behind the strike as it hit my cheek.
“Good.” I opened my mouth, ready to taste it, not that I knew what
I was doing, but he pulled
“You don’t get this monster cock that easily,” Chad teased, smirking.
“Fuckin’ beg for it, you
dirty cunt.”
His words unlocked the beast within me, and right then he could
have said or done anything,
and I’d have acquiesced. “Please, Chad. I’ve wanted your cock for so
long. Give it to me, please.
“Good boy,” he growled, slowly rolling his foreskin back and forth
revealing his big bell end,
enticing me again.
mouth.
I tried to move, gasping for breath, but Chad wasn’t going to give
me the choice. Inexperienced as I was, I kept sucking it.
“Fuck man,” he groaned. “If I’d known you were such a good cock
sucker, I’d have given it to
I wanted to tell him his was the first cock I had ever sucked but
found a rhythm I didn’t want to lose.
Now, his whole length was down my throat, I relished every single
inch of it. My gag reflex
I could hear grunting noises and knew he was close to shooting his
load. “Fucccckkkk… I’m
gonna blow…”
It would be a first for me, but I wanted it. Seconds later, his thick
spunk flooded my mouth and oozed down the back of my throat.
knew if anybody else had spat in my face, I’d have gone crazy. Him
doing it added to the already crackling sexual tension.
“Now, let’s see how good your virgin ass feels clamped around my
big, fat dick.”
“Zane, what the hell are you doing up there?” I’d just reached down
into my shorts and wrapped my
Despite being together for a long time, I had never been made privy
to this particular part of my
to move on.
But as I said above, had I known, it would not have stopped me
from falling for Zane or marrying
The fact is, bisexuality is now a part of everyday life, but now in my
thirties, I remember a time
when anything that deviated from the norm was frowned upon, even
by self-proclaimed enlightened
societies.
The old adage of don’t speak about it, pretend it doesn’t exist, and
it’s fine.
But looking at it from his point of view, when a person does not
identify with that particular label, why address it at all?
Yes, I think so and while I know he has the occasional man crush;
stand up Scott Eastwood, just as
for, Kylie Minogue, it doesn’t identify him. It’s just a silly crush with
somebody that you will never have a chance with.
In my heart of hearts, he fell for Chad the person, and not because
of what swung between his legs.
humanity and those around him, I would have consigned him to the
vacuous dustbin after date number
one.
judge and jury confidently and without batting an eyelid. But public
speaking or being the centre of attention outside of the day job is
his worst nightmare. Like I said, a conundrum to many, but to those
who know and love him, not so much.
spoken, and never swears, aside from in the bedroom. In short, his
mind works lightning fast and
words leave his lips like poetry, though many would stutter and
stammer in the same situation.
But with that no-nonsense attitude, his is a heart cast from the
purest and most solid of gold.
person he is.
him money, but as living, breathing people who have the same ups
and downs as we do.
It's not just him. His entire family are non-believers, and though he
comes from parents who have
steadfastly refuses to allow it and says that they should find religion
on their own terms. If he has his way, they will avoid anything to do
with it, but he is a man of his word, and if they came to him and
said they had found God, his reaction would be something like, ‘Oh,
have you, that’s nice, shall we go out for Ice Cream?” Where the
kids are concerned there would be no song, dance, or tantrum, but
he
Zane’s refusal to step foot inside a church has caused quite the stir
over the years. Aside from his religious objections, and the fact he
finds the buildings themselves oppressive and creepy, he has
declined more offers from friends to be Best Man because it involves
making a speech.
sat in on trials. For me, a forensic pathologist, and not versed in the
multi-layers of the law, it is a masterclass, and a sight to behold; a
stellar, calculated, and flawless performance designed to strike his
opponent down, and worthy of an Oscar for Best Actor.
Who is this man? I asked myself the first time I saw him in action,
professionally speaking of course.
No, what I was witnessing was a production worthy of the West End
stage.
The man I just described is polar opposite to the man who hates to
walk into a bar on his own; or
shies away when both men and women hit on him. Any form of
attention bothers him, disturbs him
even, and I’ve seen him dismiss those who reduce him to an object
quickly and efficiently.
So, you know a little of him, but trust me, that has not scratched the
surface. An encyclopaedia
ZANE
I stuffed my hard cock back into my shorts and jumped up, rushing
down the stairs, praying she
wouldn’t notice.
sounded.
Her expression told me she noticed the lump in my shorts. “Well, try
focusing on something other
than what’s between your legs for once.” She shot me a look that
told me how disgusted she was by
me.
couldn’t help it and wished our marriage was in a better state than it
was.
We were both still madly in love with one another, and I knew I
could speak for us both on that
was once electric had lost its spark. Sex now seemed like a chore,
not an act of love, but something we had to do.
Job done!
Thinking about the mess we were in I felt a sadness that this was
our way of life now.
Seeing that one image of Chad brought things I’d tried so hard to
bury, flooding back to me.
But that one act felt like cheating, and that didn’t sit right with me.
But I couldn’t lie to myself; Chad’s picture freed every emotion that
had long since been locked
away. That first time, and every other with him, was magical, and
the more I thought about it, the more I wished for him to be back in
my life.
“Do it.” I was nervous because I’d never been with a guy before, let
alone been fucked. But
“I’m gonna...” He spat on his hand and used it as lube, slathering his
cock and with no
slowly, then pushed his dick all the way back in.
I’d never experienced that thin line between excruciating pain and
blissful pleasure, but right there, with him, everything was as it
should be.
later, unable to hold on any longer, I shot my load all over the bed.
My orgasm forced Chad’s, and seconds later, we’d crossed the line
from friends to who knows
what?
act became much more, to me at least. But that was then, and this
is now.
woman in the world, and I truly struck gold when she agreed to
marry me.
Back then, I was the happiest man alive, then our two kids came
along, and life couldn’t have been
better.
Goddess but right now, she wasn’t enough, and I hated myself for it.
ZANE
Do it!
No, don’t!
Language: English
No. 4
ECONOMIC EFFECTS OF THE WORLD WAR
UPON WOMEN AND CHILDREN
IN GREAT BRITAIN
BY
IRENE OSGOOD ANDREWS
Assistant Secretary of the American Association
for Labor Legislation
AND
MARGARETT A. HOBBS
SECOND (REVISED) EDITION
NEW YORK
OXFORD UNIVERSITY PRESS
AMERICAN BRANCH: 35 WEST 32ⁿᵈ STREET
London, Toronto, Melbourne and Bombay
1921
FIRST EDITION
FEBRUARY, 1918
COPYRIGHT 1921
BY THE
CARNEGIE ENDOWMENT FOR INTERNATIONAL PEACE
2 Jackson Place
Washington, D. C.
David Kinley,
Editor.
AUTHOR’S PREFACE TO
REVISED EDITION
Following the publication of the first edition, opportunity came in
1919 to visit again both England and France and to secure first hand
information concerning the effects of the war upon the economic
position of women. As a member of the commission sent by the
Young Women’s Christian Association to study the industrial outlook
for women and children, there was occasion to interview many
representative people in this field and to collect a large amount of
recently published material bearing upon the subject.
The world conflict brought to women, in those countries where
the industrial system was kept intact, an extraordinary invitation to
active employment outside the home and in new occupations. In
England and France millions of women were dislodged from their
accustomed tasks and thrown into novel positions in industry, in
trade and commerce and even in the professions. Many thousands
have remained in the new occupations, and the vast majority will
never be content to go back to their former places on the old terms.
The remarkable physical endurance of the women doing war
work has been very generally recognized. This endurance has been
attributed partly to the zeal of the women, but more particularly to
higher wages, which enabled them to secure better food, clothing
and lodging. Comfort from increased income was supplemented by
canteens, welfare work and greater consideration in general for the
health of wage earners.
Will woman’s improved income level be permanent? Careful
analysis shows that during the war, despite government pledges,
women did not receive equal treatment with men in respect to
wages. Moreover, while money wages in many cases were greatly
increased, seldom did they keep pace with the advancing cost of
living. Furthermore, it became doubtful whether women were to be
allowed to retain the more attractive positions if these were desired
by men.
No one, since the war experience, doubts the skill and
adaptability of women in performing a great number of tasks formerly
considered “men’s work.” With the extensive standardization which
British industry has adopted many more places can be successfully
filled by women. Equal opportunity to secure positions, as well as
equality of payment, appeals therefore to many thousands of women
as merely a matter of justice. But such a new status for women, it is
recognized, calls for more scientific methods in fixing wages. The old
basis of sex, family obligation, tradition as to “men’s work” and
“women’s work,” must be abandoned. Instead, some definite rate for
a specified occupation, and where possible specified qualifications
as to ability for such work, must be adopted. Moreover, it is
increasingly recognized that the national welfare demands that
money wages must be at least equal to the cost of living.
Such a program would place men and women more nearly on a
strictly competitive basis, with the awards given to the most efficient.
It would practically eliminate the constant “undercutting” now taking
place and would introduce a more scientific element into the present
chaotic wage market.
The insistent need for a thoroughgoing revision as to methods of
determining wage rates is recognized by Mrs. Sidney Webb in her
minority statement in the Report of the War Cabinet Committee on
Women in Industry, 1919. Mrs. Webb recommends for immediate
adoption four main principles. (1) The establishment of a national
minimum rate of wage; (2) the determination of a standard or
occupational rate above the national minimum; (3) the adjustment of
money wages to the cost of living; and (4) wherever possible the
requirement of efficiency qualifications. As to children and “young
persons” in Great Britain the Fisher Education Act already has
indicated a greater emphasis on training and there is hope that their
employment will eventually become either subordinate to or, better
still, a part of education.
The scarcity of labor now presents an appalling problem in
several countries and one of the outstanding effects of the loss of
human life in all war stricken nations is renewed interest in the
protection of motherhood. In these countries measures are being
adopted to conserve the lives of mothers and babies. Better medical
and nursing care are recognized as essential, cash maternity
benefits are increasing, maternity centers are being greatly extended
and in England the endowment of motherhood is proposed.
This revised monograph, while attempting to present a fairly
complete history of the industrial experience of women and children
during and immediately following the war, is still necessarily
tentative. Some years must elapse before it will be possible to
measure the full effects of the world war upon the economic
condition of women and children. This revision is brought out,
however, at this time to supply a demand which quickly exhausted
the first edition, and in the hope that it will be of service to those
interested in the progress of women industrial workers.
ECONOMIC EFFECTS
OF
THE WORLD WAR
ON
WOMEN AND CHILDREN
IN GREAT BRITAIN
CHAPTER I
Introductory Summary
Increase in Numbers
Upon women and children fell much of the great burden of
keeping trade and industry active and of supplying war demands
when several millions of men were taken away for military service.
“Without the work of the women the war could not have gone on,”
said representatives of the British Ministry of Munitions while in New
York in November, 1917. Before the increased demand was felt,
however, the dislocation of industry during the first few months of
war brought far more suffering to women workers than to men. In
September, 1914, over 40 per cent of the women were out of work or
on short time. The “luxury” trades, which employed a large
proportion of women, were most severely affected, and the women
could not relieve the situation by enlisting as the men did. The
prewar level of employment was not reached until April, 1915.
Between that date and July, 1918, the number of females gainfully
occupied increased by 1,659,000 over the number at work in July,
1914.
It is more difficult to ascertain the exact increase in the number of
working children and young persons under eighteen, but apparently
more children left school for work directly at the end of the
compulsory education period and more were illegally employed.
Official reports show an increase from 1,936,000 in July, 1914, to
2,278,000 in January, 1918, or 17.6 per cent, in the number of boys
and girls under eighteen who were gainfully employed. In addition, in
August, 1917, Mr. Herbert Fisher, president of the Board of
Education, admitted in the House of Commons that in the past three
years some 600,000 children under fourteen had been “put
prematurely to work” through the relaxation of child labor and
compulsory school laws. But in October of the same year the Board
of Trade stated that 90,000 boys had left school for work during the
war. The earlier exemptions, statistics of which have been published,
were almost entirely for agriculture, but judging from Mr. Fisher’s
statement a considerable number of exemptions were made for
mining and munitions work during the third year of the war.
One of the most notable effects of the war was the number of
occupations which women entered for the first time, until, in the
winter of 1916-17, it could be said that “there are practically no
trades in which some process of substitution [of women for men] has
not taken place.” According to official figures, 1,816,000 females
were taking men’s places in April, 1918.
During the first year of the war, however, women took men’s
places for the most part in transportation, in retail trade and in
clerical work rather than in manufacturing. In factory work, while
some women were found to be undertaking processes slightly above
their former level of skill in establishments where they had long been
employed, the most general change was a transfer from slack
industries to fill the expanding demands of firms making war
equipment. There women were employed in the same kinds of work
they had carried on before the war. The rush into the munitions
industry, where women engaged in both “men’s” and “women’s”
work, was one of the most important features of the second year of
war. While a few additional women had begun to be taken on very
early in the war, the increases were not large until the autumn of
1915 and early winter of 1916. During 1915-1916 also a decline was
first noticed in the number of women in domestic service, in the
printing trades, and in such typical “women’s trades” as
confectionery and laundry work.
In the third year of the war the substitution of women for men on
a large scale was extended from munitions to numerous staple
industries having a less direct connection with the war. In many
cases, of course, the women did not do precisely the same work as
their masculine predecessors. Especially in the engineering trades
almost an industrial revolution occurred between 1914 and 1917.
Skilled processes were subdivided, and automatic machinery was
introduced, all the changes tending toward greater specialization and
the elimination of the need of all round craft skill. Early in the war it
was generally considered that women were not as efficient as men
except on routine and repetition work. But as the women gained
experience it was observed that more and more of them were
undertaking the whole of a skilled man’s job, and the testimony as to
relative efficiency, on work within a woman’s strength, became far
more favorable. During the last year of the struggle, while a few new
fields were invaded, the process of substitution had progressed
nearly as far as possible, and the year witnessed mainly a settling
down into the new lines of work previously entered.
Though the increase in women workers in agriculture was less
marked than in industry, beginning with the summer of 1916, the
numbers rose, being 113,000 in 1918, in contrast to 80,000 in 1914.
The widening of professional opportunities and the opening of some
executive positions in industry and commerce were other important
features of the changes in women’s work.
Women even engaged in work ordinarily a part of soldiers’ duties.
Besides thousands of military nurses, a special corps of women
under semi-military discipline was recruited for work as clerks,
cooks, cleaners, chauffeurs and mechanics behind the lines in
France. These “Waacs,” as they were popularly called, numbered
over 50,000 by the end of the war. The “Wrens” did similar shore
duty for the Navy, and the “Wrafs,” woodcutting for the Board of
Trade. The women were able to take up their new lines of work with
surprisingly little formal training, the chief exceptions being short
practical courses for farm workers and semi-skilled munition makers.
Changes in the work done by children were considerably different
for girls and for boys. For girls the choice of occupations widened
much as for adult women. But for boys, though a few received earlier
promotion to skilled men’s work than would ordinarily have been the
case, on the whole training for skilled trades declined. With the men
drawn into the war and with the increasing cost of living, it was
natural that an increase should take place in the number of child
street traders, and in the number of children working outside school
hours.
Wages
Under war conditions the wages of both women and children
were raised, probably the largest gains being made by boy and girl
munition makers. The smallest rise seems to have occurred in the
unregulated, so-called “women’s trades,” like laundry work. The
trade boards made a number of increases in the industries within
their jurisdiction, but the changes were seldom proportionate to the
increase in the cost of living. Instead, what it was believed the
industry would be able to support after the war was usually the
determining factor. The economic position of the women who took
men’s places was undoubtedly improved, though, even taking into
account differences in experience and efficiency and the numerous
changes in industrial method, the plane of economic equality
between the two sexes was rarely attained. The government had the
power to fix women’s wages on munitions work and in so doing it
seemed at first to go on record in favor of the equal pay principle.
But, in practice, the principle was not applied to unskilled and semi-
skilled time work and the women failed to receive the same cost of
living bonuses as the men, though unquestionably the wages of
women substitutes in munitions work was much higher than the
prewar level of women’s wages. Where other industries were
covered by trade union agreements, women in most instances
received “equal pay,” but in the remaining cases of substitution, for
instance in agriculture, though considerable increases were gained,
the men’s rates were by no means reached.