Sharma

36 24 36 eske aalwa bhi inki kai aachi aadete HAI

……. Dhere dhere malum ho jaye ga ….yaha
aapka full entertainment hoga
KAALE
Aap dono

JASSI
Aap jaise hi blind people's club ke member hai

KAALE
Aap dono yaha kab se hai
JASSI
Mere ghutne ke choot bhar gaye hai eska matlab 15 din ho gaye

KAALE
Ghutne ke choot
Jassi

5 feet ka exam maine bhi pass kiya

hai lekin ekbaat hai kejale ji club
badhiya chalati hai kisi na kisi
tarike se entertainment hoga aabhi
aake andar aane se bhi

Kale
Andar girne se
Jassi
Vahi lekin use bhi humara bharpur entertainment hua

SHARMA
Aap zyaada mat sochiye, hum dono ki entry bhi issi tarah hui. Without silence

JASSI
By the Way, Yeh hai Mrs. Sharma

SHARMA
Aur Iska Naam hai Jaspreet Kaur.

KENJALE
Aur mein hoon, Kenjale- the owner of the club- naam toh suna hi hoga, yeh lijeye garma
garam chai!

KAALE
Aur mein Sadashiv KAale

SHARMA
Kaaale yaani -Brahaman ya maratha?

KAALE
Kyu, JAati kyu poochte ho?
KENJALE
Arey Kaale ji, aaap bura kyu maante hai?Sawaal pasand nahi aaya toh kuch aur poch
lete hai. Aap kaaale hai gore hai, mote hai, patle hai

JASSI
Kya aap dikhte Chotte hai?

KENJALE
Single hai ya Mingle hai ya karte abhi bhi Jingle hai? Lawyer hai? Darji hai ya Surgeon
hai?

JASSI
Kya aap virgin hai? E

S
Mein Brahaman hoon! H
K A
A R
A M
L A
Hone dijiye!Humme koi problem nahi hai! BTW aapke Headlights kab phuunte?

Headlight?
KAALE

Jassi
Vo, pooch rahi hai ki aaapne kala chashma kab se lagaya?

KENJALE
Arey, aaapki batti kab gul hui? Kale ji

KAALE
Chodiye mein vo yaad nahi karna chahta

SHARMA
Kyu nahi ? Hum batate hai sharmajee ke saath saath humari headlights bhi saath
chaali gayi , yeh jaasi ne apni aaakho ka istemaal 2 saal pehle kiya tha aur yeh
kenjale ji toh Janam se hi andere mea hai.

KEJALE

Take a chill pill kaleji relax hokar bataiye

SHARMA
Befir ho jaiye apki gaadi kahi idhr udhr chli gyi, toh hum usse line pr le aayenge.
Ghumaiye chabi.

KAALE
JASSI, SHARMAJI, aur KEJALEJI… Zindagi ke khel kitne aagyaat hote hai, sapne
mein bhi jis cheez ki Kalpana nhi krte wo samne pratkash ho jata hai.

KEJALE
OH MY GOD! Too much philosophy.
KAALE
Baat agr zindagi ki ho rhi hai, toh philosophy toh hogi hi.
KEJALE
Khel toh mere sath ho rha hai KAALE JI, dekhiye mujhe aaj machli khani thi, aur aj
poora ka poora bazaar band hai…ais wajah se dekhiye mujhe ghass phoos kahana
pad rha hai.
KAALE
Acha apko machli kahana pasand hai…?

KEJALE
Arre mere liye toh machli hi zindagi hai. Mein apni zindagi ki Kalpana machli ke
bina kr hi nhi sakta.
KAALE
Acha apko tali machli pasand hai ya tari.

KEJALE
No I like it wet.

JASSI
Mujhe bhi.
SHARMA

KEJALE JI aap gaadi galat raaste pe le ke jaa rhe ho.

JASSI
Brief mein jitna important hai utna hi batiye.
KAALE
Baat abhi haal hi ki hai, maine shaddi.com se ek ladki ko pasand kiya tha..
Acha time beet rha tha.. Phir ek din hum movie dekhne gye, horror wali movie.
Uske baad hum shushi khane restaurant gye. Raat zada ho gyi toh mein usse apne
room pr le aya. Aur phir……
KEJALE
Aur phir …..Apka kat gya..??
KAALE
Nhi usse bhi bura. Mein bhi JASSIJI ki tarah exercise ke last set pr tha..

JASSI
Acha aap bhi dumbells maar rhe the.
KAALE
Nhi Bench press… 90,91,92,93,94,95,96,97,98,99, 100….

KEJALE, JASSI, SHARMA

Arre toh phir kya hua…
KAALE
Diya bhuj gya…
JASSI
Matlb orgasm aya aur aakhen gyi.
SHARMA
Arre chlo chlo 10 baj gye, nahane ka time ho gya.
KAALE
Aap log ek sath hi nahate hai.
JASSI
Nhi Nhi hum toh bss occasionally.
Kejale
baju ke Ghar mea ek ladaka nahata hai
Kalle
baju ke Ghar ka ladka
Jassi
Jawan ladka, aapne kabhi kisi ko nahate hue sunna hai
Kalle
Kya ladake ko nahate hue sunna
Sharma
Dekhna kismat mea nahi hai es liye sirf sunna
Kejale
Sunne mea toh sirf sukh hi sukh hai
Kale
AAP log kitne wierd hai
Sharma
Sant rahiye kuch hi time mea nahana shuru hone wala hai
Zappa is the music ready???
Kalle
music ??
Jassi
Arre taki Puri feel ayee
KEJALE
Dekho…dekho wo aa gya..mere ko jana padinga..mereko jana padinga.
KAALE
Arre kon..kon??
SHARMA
The heart throbbing Rahul…
(Excitement, applause..)
Kejale
Kuch kuch hota hai kale ji aap nahi samjhege
KAALE
Mujhe kuch samjh nahi AA Raha
Jassi
Arre Mai aapko samjhati hu

SHARMA
Shuu..suno ab wo apne kapde utar raha hai(light music starts),
Ab usne shower chalu kiya ……aaye hayee
Haye uske badan par pani ke boonde lagata hai , mano jaise kisi banzar zameen
pr barish ho gyi ho
SHARMA
AESE waqt aakh nahi hai uska bahut dukh hota hai
Lekin Kushboo sughiye toh sahi , esse samajk sake GE , usne sabun lagana shuru
kiya hai
Kejale
Lux ki Khusboo?
Sharma
nahi nahi sayad vo Chandan ki Khusboo hai
Kejale
Uske jaisi wild personality wale pr toh wild stone hi suit karega.
SHARM
Bilkul Singham wale ajay Devgan ki tarah..56 inch ka seena..

KEJALE
Har ladki ki khwaish hoti hai, aise hi biceps, triceps aur six pack abs wala macho
man mile…
Both are dancing)
Kejale
WAH WAH kya Din tha ….. aaj toh maaza hi a gaya ….koe rahul jaise handsome,
gabru , jawan mil jaye toh
Sharma
Sahi kaha aap ne ……phir toh life set hai kejale ji
Kalle
Aapko kaise pata ki vo ladka hi hai
Sharma
Kya malum vo ladka hai ki nahi, lekin aachi imagination ke sath entertainment
karwa lene mea harz hi kya hai. Baju ke bathroom se har roj subh 10 baje aawaz
aati ..ab kon nah Raha hai vo hame hi decide karna hai….vo Jawan ladka hai yeh
sochne mea kya harz hai
Kalle
Par
Kejale
Kalle es club ek hi moto hai ….kisi n kisi tarah entertainment karna ya karwa Lena
phir chahe waha ladka naha raha ho kutta Buddha bhudid

KAALE
Ye sab kya sunna pad rha, kash mea andhe ke sath behara bhi hota
Aree JASSIJI thoda maryada mein rahiye. Apne dumbell mariye, meri rod kyu
chedte hai
(Kejale
kale ji aree o kale ji ,aapke haal behal kyu hai, lagta hai aapko hamri khatir dari
pasand nahi aaye

Kale
Aapka club kuch jada hi anokha haiii

Kejale
Aare vo sab chodiye , aapki chai thandi ho rahi hai. Lejiye
Aapke liya special chai banae hai……….with nooo sugar

Kale
Without sugar….. kyu?

Kejale
Aare aakhe aur gala aapke paas hai nahi upar se cigrate aur daru aap daba ke
peete hai, aur jis tarah se apka sexiddent sunna.. toh socha apke bache kuche
sperm hi bacha lu.

Sharma
Kale nervous nahi hona kejle ji aese hi bolte hai aapke prajannan sakti bahut
majbut hai , aap befikr rahe
Jassi
Mujhe lagta hai ek bete ke baat prajanan sakti katam hone me kya hi harz, vaise
bhi desh ki population kafi tezi se upr ja rhi hai.

Kejale
chill guys muje lagata hai , kale ji modern khayalato ke hai … jine pasand hai sirf
love sex aur dhoka
Jassi
Kale battery mea Prakash ke liye do cell lagate hai , vo bhi charged , ek se kya
hoga.
Kejale
Jassi, jaban ko lagam do, batt karete samay visith maryado ka palan karna
chahiye, maine kai baar aapse bola hai ki asleel , vibhatsa bate na kare . behen de
takkee

Sharma
Oh hooo , kejale ji chai shai toh ho gayi yeh bataeye aaj raat menu mea kya hai.
Kejale
(Reads menu)

Jassi
Are yr aaj kuch chatpata khane ka maan hai
Sharma
Ha kale ji se bhi pooch lete hai, vo brahman hai , kuch aesa jo vo bhi kha sake…..
toh chili chicken kaisa rahe ga
Jassi
Kejale ji agar chilli chicken dinner mea ho jata toh
Kejale
Are kyu nahi , lekin kale ji aap toh non veg nahi khate hoge na
Kale
Are nahi nahi aaj mangalwar nahi hai toh chicken fish daru sab chalega
Kejale
Chaliye sharma ji machali pakadne ka time ho gaya
Kale
Abhi toh aapne kaha ki aap chicken banaye ge
Kejale
chicken toh pahle se hi rakha hai …..arre machali pakadan toh ek bahana hai
….aasli maksad toh machalo se isqh ladana hai
Sharma
Aur Mai unke paas baithkar gadi ka horn sunta hu , mujhe sayad kisi horn se
jeevan ka rahasaya mil jaye…chaliye master jii

JASSI
(Starts whistling)
KALE
Aaj Mausam kafi acha hai.
JASSI
HMM..
KALE
Kejaleji waise chai kafi achi banate hai.
Waise Jassiji bura na mane toh ek baat puchu..
JASSI
Puchiye
KALE
Aap andhe kaise hue ?
JASSI
Dekhiye toh Kaleji mujhe cancer hai.
KALE
Hahahah, Jassiji aap Mazak krne se baaz nhi aiyenge.
JASSI
Nhi Kaleji mujhe sach mein cancer hai.
Malignant ostrocytoma brain tumor.
KALE
I’m sorry Jassiji, pls continue.
JASSI
Forget it Kaleji, Aap apni sympathy apne pass rakhiye, aur mein jo keh raha hu
usse dhyan se suniye. Bhot interesting hai.
Kaleji, Light jab cornea ko par krke retina oar padti hai, waha se optic nerve nikalti
hai. Jis junction pe wo optic nerve cross krti hai isse charisma kehte hai. Doctory
bhasha mein yeh … ke dimag mein hoti hai, apke bhi aur mere bhi. Bas farak sirf
itna hai ki meri optic charisma par malignant ostro cytoma baitha hai aur din-be-
din uska akaar badh rha hai and mein Dheere Dheere andhi ho gyi.
Aap samjhe na ?
Dekhiye dekh nhi sakte par imagine kr sakte hai and optic nerve aise cross hoti
hai. Toh batiye jaha optic nerve cross hoti hai, waha jo tumor baitha hai use kya
kehte hai ?
KALE
Malignant ostro cytoma.
JASSI
Bhot acha. Toh jab ye shuru hui tab ye chane ke akar ka tha, Usse koi takleef nhi
thi lekin chane ka matar hhua and matar ka kancha. Tab aakhon ke dono kinaro se
dikna band hogya. Phele raste se guzarte samay tedhi narzo se ladko ko tad sakti
thi. Ab tirchi narzo se bhi andhera dikhai deta hai, fir andhera kinaro se center ki
ore badhne laga. Tab tak kancha ka amla ho gya tha. Kale apke dhyan mein toh aa
rha hai na ?

KALE
Chane se matar, matar se kancha aur kanche se amla. Fir amle se ?
JASSI
Aur suniye toh asli maja ab ayega malignant cancer matlb felne wala cancer. Fir
bhi ye tumor brain se sharer ke dosre hisso mein felne laga. Chaliye mein apko
batata hu ye kese felta hai. Tumor brain se felne yha gya, fir waha gya, fir idhr gya,
fir udhr gya, fir aisa gya, fir waisa gya.
(KEJALE & SHARMA enters)
KALE
Are JASSI aage toh bataiye, kaha gyi aap.
JASSI
Kaleji aap kaha hai ? (Kejale ko pakdte hue)
Ye rhea ap. Are idhr toh aiye!
KALE
Toh wo tumor iss time kaha hai ?
 JASSI
Kaleji apki awaj itni door se kyu aa rhi hai.
KALE
Jassi hum dono yaha akele hai na toh awaj goonj rhi hai.