February 2024

Taking
Make A Difference
DAAJI

Care
Are We Taking
Care of Each
Other?
LAURA OTIS

Human Flourishing
VASCO GASPAR

Thoughts About
Painting India
KATHLEEN
SCARBORO

ER OF
OW
THE P

LO
VE
SA

ER

RA
BUBB

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Writers — Ichak Adizes, Sara Bubber, Daaji, Snehal
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All rights reserved.
It’s a pity that it often takes difficult or tragic circumstances, even global calamities like the ones we are
currently experiencing, to ask whether we are really taking care of one another. Only then do we reflect on
our complicity in letting a loved one, a group of people, the environment, or the whole planet travel so far
down a lonely road, wishing we could have done more.
In the February edition of Heartfulness Magazine, we continue our journey of balancing awareness with
compassionate action, to find solutions for a more peaceful and united world. Our contributors share
stories of empathy and kindness, life transitions, hard lessons, and experiences of community that have
encouraged them to reflect on what caring for others looks like.
This month, Daaji invites us to make a difference, and shows us how awareness and higher levels of
consciousness are connected. Vasco Gaspar encourages loving self-acceptance through healing body-mind
exercises. Laura Otis reflects on the ethics of care, and Neeraja Kairam on grief and support. Shanthi
Venkat reminds us to take better care of ourselves in order to age gracefully, and Ichak Adizes shares a
surprising solution for work-life balance. Stanislas Lajugie explores sleep health, Sriram Raghavendran
where attention goes, and Snehal Deshpande work-life balance. Ananya Patel looks at environmental
issues through art, Kathleen Scarboro exhibits her stunning paintings of India, and Sara Bubber tells us a
story about love.
We encourage you to reach out to us with your own thoughts on taking care of one another at
contributions@heartfulnessmagazine.com.
Happy reading,
The editors

H eart f u l n es s Feb r uar y 2 024

 inside
self-care workplace environment
Make a Difference The Lone Ranger The Earth We Share
Daaji Ichak Adizes Ananya Patel
12 40 62

Practices for Human How Is Your Sleep Health?

Flourishing
Vasco Gaspar
Stanislas Lajugie
creativity
42
16
Striking a Balance Thoughts on Painting India
Where Attention Goes, Snehal Deshpande Kathleen Scarboro
Energy Flows
47 70
Sriram Raghavendran
24
relationships children
inspiration
Transforming Grief The Power of Love
Neeraja Kairam Sara Bubber
The Nature of Higher
Consciousness
52 78
Daaji Aging Gracefully
28 Shanthi Venkat

Are We Taking Care of Each

56
Other?
Interview with Laura Otis
32

6 H eart f u l n es s Feb r uar y 2 024 7


DAAJI
Daaji is the Heartfulness
Guide. He is an innovator and
researcher, equally at home in the
fields of spirituality, science, and
the evolution of consciousness.
He has taken our understanding
of human potential to a new
level.
SARA BUBBER
Sara is a storyteller, Montessori
consultant, and a children’s book
author. She is also a naturalist,
doing her doctoral work in eco-
consciousness in childhood. She
has been practicing Heartfulness
for eight years and is a certified
trainer.
8 H eart f u l n es s
ICHAK ADIZES
Dr. Adizes is a leading
management expert. He has
received 21 honorary doctorates
and is the author of 27 books
that have been translated into 36
languages. He is recognized as
one of the top 30 thought leaders
of America.
ANANYA PATEL
Ananya is a designer and
illustrator who enjoys finding
dynamic ways to tell stories.
She works on projects with
social impact, and runs a youth
collective bringing innovative
design approaches to climate
action and gender equality.
KATHLEEN SCARBORO
A commission from The Public
Art Workshop of Chicago was
the beginning of a lifelong career
in art for Kathleen. Her series
of Reunion Island paintings
were exhibited in the main hall
of the Museum of Mankind,
Paris, and “Indian Women:
Grace and Resilience” was
exhibited in the Town Hall of the
16th Arrondissement in Paris,
December 2023.
STANISLAS LAJUGIE
Stanislas is a civil servant of
the Foreign Affairs Ministry of
France. He has worked in many
countries and enjoys making
meditation fashionable wherever
he goes. He has developed
a course on the science of
meditation for universities and
corporates.
LAURA OTIS
Dr. Otis is Professor of English
at Emory University. Her
research has been supported
by MacArthur, Guggenheim,
Fulbright, and Humboldt
Fellowships. She is the author
of non-fiction and fiction books,
including Banned Emotions,
Rethinking Thought, and The
Memory Hive.
SHANTHI VENKAT
Shanthi Venkat is a Heartfulness
Meditation trainer, a certified
Tai Chi instructor, and a retired
physical therapist based in the
United States. She balances
her love of the sciences and
healthcare with her creative
passion for cooking, baking, and
gardening.
contributors
SRIRAM RAGAVENDRAN
Sriram is a Heartfulness
practitioner and trainer working
in the tech sector. He enjoys
reflecting on his small, day-to-
day experiences to gain a deeper
insight into the principles of life.
SNEHAL DESHPANDE
Dr. Snehal is a developmental
therapist who owns and leads
SNEH, an institution dedicated
to improving the quality of life
of children and their families.
She is passionate about spiritual
well-being and actively drives the
Heartfulness CME initiative for
healthcare professionals across
India.
Feb r uar y 2 024
NEERAJA KAIRAM
Neeraja has been a board-
certified pediatrician and
specialist in pediatric emergency
medicine for the past 25 years.
She currently resides in New
Jersey, USA, with her three
children and manages a general
pediatric practice. She enjoys
reading, tennis, and travel in her
spare time.
VASCO GASPAR
Vasco is a Human Flourishing
Facilitator, inspiring change in
organizations worldwide for a more
human and compassionate world.
Trained directly by some of the world’s
greatest specialists in the fields of
Mindfulness, Emotional Intelligence,
neuroscience, and Heartfulness, his
dream is to co-create the future by
merging these practices in the service of
a greater good: Human Flourishing.
9
self-care
Everyone can be great, because
everyone can serve.

MARTIN LUTHER KING JR.

 YES, YOU CAN DO IT!

S E LF-CARE

Make a Difference: The principle of seva (Sanskrit picks up the ball and places it in

Volunteer and Serve

for selfless service) has endured
forever. Seva in its subtle
essence is not confined to
external actions; it is a state
of being, a way of life that
DAAJI invites you to spend some time doing things for others. Whether it is volunteering, embodies love in action, with
serving others, or cleaning up your local community environment, every small act helps! no expectation of reward or
Daaji also shares a simple night-time ritual that we can all do to make a difference. recognition. It is an attitude
that eventually becomes our
nature. Selfless service and
volunteering on an individual
“I devote a portion of my time to helping others. level are transformative; they
It is good for my own health.” contribute to our personal
health and spiritual growth, as
—Louise Hay well as to collective upliftment.
An experiment done
his hands. Simple!
Volunteering and service
directly feed our feelings
of self-worth: they combat
loneliness, bring us out of our
isolation, open us up to new
experiences, improve our self-
confidence, and bring a sense
of purpose and self-esteem, so
we feel valued, which in turn
protects us from stress and
depression.
What would you like to
do?

D
ear friends, with children aged 3 to 4 It is a question with a multitude
demonstrates that helping of answers. Our lifestyles and
Many people, both without any personal gain is responsibilities determine how
young and old, tell me how inherent in the human psyche. much any of us can do, so it
they are feeling helpless and An adult picks up a ball from may be something very simple.
hopeless with the constant the floor then drops it. Making For those with more time and
news of disasters, wars, and a pretence of sadness, he picks energy, there are many roles
the environmental impacts of it up again and drops it again. in larger organizations that
human behavior on our beloved This pretense continues a few help the less fortunate and the
Earth. They are concerned and more times, until one of the environment.
uncertain about the future. And, children walks up to the adult,
indeed, the news is disturbing.

But the news doesn’t tell us

everything. What about the Selfless service and volunteering on an
stories of the many individuals,
groups, and organizations individual level are transformative; they
around the world selflessly
working to aid others less contribute to our personal health and
fortunate, cleaning up the
environment, planting trees,
spiritual growth, as well as to
and feeding others, bringing collective upliftment.
hope with acts of kindness,
compassion, and love?

12 H eart f u l n es s Feb r uar y 2 024 13

SEL F -CARE
It may be as simple as visiting
an elderly person who is lonely,
volunteering at an animal rescue
center or homeless shelter,
working in a food bank, creating a
vegetable garden in waste ground
for others, reducing your use of
plastics, cleaning up litter, doing
small acts of kindness, or teaching
others to relax and meditate. There
are so many ways.
Where do you see a need that
resonates in your heart?
The 9 p.m. prayer for
humanity
Another subtle and potent way of
serving others is through prayer.
A prayer that radiates from a
sincere heart with a genuine
desire to alleviate suffering and
14
bring joy creates a remarkable
vibration for change. I invite you
to join our global movement by
praying with thousands of others
around the world at 9 p.m. local
time for fifteen minutes. It creates
a beautiful resonance in your
heart, a softness, and a feeling of
connectedness that expands to all.
Everyone is being filled with
love and devotion and real
faith is growing stronger in
them.
Truth, righteousness, and faith
are being established in the
world.
All kinds of distractions faced
by our country and our planet
are going away.
H eart f u l n es s
S E LF-CARE
When we take one
step at a time,
doing one positive
thing each day, we
will collectively
bring joy, care, and
hope to others
through kind and
selfless acts.
May this entire Earth be
engulfed with peace and with
love.
When we take one step at a time,
doing one positive thing each day,
we will collectively bring joy, care,
and hope to others through kind
and selfless acts. Every gesture,
no matter how modest, will
contribute to the collective welfare
of humanity and our dear Mother
Earth. We will not only uplift
others; we will also experience
profound personal growth and
fulfillment.
All the best,
Daaji
Feb r uar y 2 024 15

Practices
L
ike my Portuguese ancestors
who explored the world
in search of goods, during
the last decades I’ve also been
for Human
exploring different tools,
methodologies, and approaches
that contribute to “human
flourishing”—the blossoming
of the human spirit, and full
realization of our potential for
Flourishing
goodness and compassion, as
well as the understanding of the
interconnectedness we share with
each other and our environment.
These include awareness-based
practices like Mindfulness and
Presencing; trauma-informed
In a 2-part series, VASCO GASPAR will share methodologies like Polyvagal
different methodologies and approaches Theory, Internal Family Systems,
to human flourishing, to help us realize our and Compassionate Inquiry
potential for goodness and compassion, and (Gabor Mate’s methodology);
understand the interconnectedness we share and heart-rooted approaches like
with each other and the world. Giftivism and the timeless wisdom
of Heartfulness, which is where I
find my spiritual “home.”
16 H eart f u l n es s Feb r uar y 2 024
S E LF-CARE
At some point during this
quest, I started to see and sense
connections between the different
fields, and how they could be
brought together to allow us to
flourish into our potential. That
led to the design and craft of
experiences, retreats, and programs
we’ve delivered to hundreds of
people worldwide in the past
years. We call it “awareness-based
human flourishing” since there
is the underlying notion that, by
increasing our awareness about
different aspects of ourselves, we
can also become more conscious
of our innate basic wisdom, our
underlying sanity, and, from a
space of deeper consciousness,
to be capable of acting in the
world in ways that are wiser, saner
and more compassionate toward
ourselves, other people, and Life as
a whole.
In sharing these practices and
resources, I encourage you to be
the scientist on your journey of
spiritual experimentation. See how
the practices resonate with you.
Take everything you find helpful
and leave the rest.
17
SEL F -CAR E
Integral awareness
Let’s start with the notion that
we are composed and part of
many different systems and sub-
systems and that by increasing
our awareness, we can also
increase our choices and capacity
to integrate those same systems.
Beyond many others, here are five
systems or “bodies” I invite you to
consider. We’re going to bring our
awareness into each one:
Gross body, the physical body
Subtle body, the mind
Causal body, the Self or soul
Social body, community and
relationships
Big body, Life
Here is an exercise that will allow
you to become aware of each of
these bodies:
1
Take a moment to become
aware of the present moment
and the different layers of
your experience.
2 9
Notice how Life is flowing
through your different
senses at this moment.
What do you notice about sounds,
smells, and sights? What tastes
do you notice in your mouth?
What signals are you receiving
through your skin about touch,
temperature, and humidity?
Take a moment to
become aware of
the present
moment and the
different layers of
your experience.
3
Bring awareness to the
physical body. How is your
physical body feeling at
this moment? Is it relaxed, tense,
agitated, anxious, tired? Is your
breath fast or slow? Deep or
shallow? Any particular tension in
the body? What happens if you let
go of even a fraction of it?
4
Now, turn to your inner
world, your mind. Any
thoughts, images, voices,
or emotions you notice? What
is the “inner weather” like? See
if you can witness these inner
movements without any judgment.
What are they trying to tell you?
5
Dive deeper into your heart.
Can you sense a timeless,
wise presence? What do you
notice when you connect with that
deeper and still space, with your
Self ?
6
Keep your awareness rooted
in the heart, but expand it
to include all people with
whom you are connected. Family,
friends, colleagues, even strangers.
Does anyone in particular come
to mind? Feel those connections,
heart to heart. Who are you
connected with?
7
Finally, expand your heart
connection to other beings,
to the whole web of Life.
Can you sense that connection?
Can you feel the inter-beingness?
Can you sense that you are part of
a larger whole, a larger “being”?
Keep your
awareness rooted
in the heart, but
expand it to include
all people with
whom you are
connected.
8
Use the last moments to
rest your awareness on
these different phenomena
happening simultaneously within
the different bodies. There is
nothing to achieve. Simply sit with
a wide-open awareness, an open
heart, that includes everything and
everyone.
Finish by asking, “What’s
the wisest and most
compassionate thing I can
do now that can contribute to
the Greater Good?” Don’t think
about the answer. Simply notice
any inner guidance that emerges
in the form of thoughts, intuitions,
and body sensations. If nothing
emerges, that’s fine. Maybe the
best action at this moment is no
action at all.
Feb r uar y 2 024
The physical body
Zoom in on your physical body.
There are many data points
you can pay attention to, but
I’m inviting you to notice the
general tone of your autonomic
nervous system (ANS). The ANS
is responsible for many bodily
processes, with the goal of keeping
us alive and safe. It controls
digestion, the breath, the beating
heart, and many other things.
Most importantly, the ANS
controls your energy levels and
emotions (energy in motion),
according to its perception of
danger versus safety. 1 If it senses
that you are safe, your ANS
becomes regulated and you might
feel calm, relaxed, engaged,
connected, grounded, curious, and
playful. You can think clearly and
connect with others from a place
of curiosity. If, however, the ANS
senses danger, it might either
activate a mobilization response,
known as the “fight or flight” or
stress response, elevating the level
19
SEL F -CAR E
of energy in your system, making
you feel hyper-alert, scared, under
pressure, irritated, anxious, or
judgmental. It may also activate
an immobilization response by
lowering your energy levels to
a minimum to help you survive
through “disappearance.” Known
as the “faint response,” this makes
you feel immobilized, without
energy, numb, hopeless, lost, or
disconnected from yourself and
everything around you.
There are other states, like the
freeze response, in which you
cannot think or even move. The
freeze response is a blend of
mobilization and immobilization,
almost like having the break and
the accelerator of a car pressed
simultaneously.
20
Regulation, mobilization,
and immobilization
Why are these states important?
Because how you feel directly
impacts how you perceive the
world and the narratives you tell
yourself about it. If you feel angry,
you may perceive the world as
dangerous and others as a threat.
If you feel sad and numb, you may
perceive the world as meaningless
and lose the capacity to connect
with others and your life purpose.
If you feel calm, regulated, and
safe, you will navigate the world
and your relationship with yourself
and others from a much deeper
and saner place.
If you feel
calm,
regulated, and
safe, you will
navigate the
world and your
relationship
with yourself
and others
from a much
deeper and
saner place.
H eart f u l n es s
The main message here is that if
you change your physiology and
the tone of your ANS, you will
change how you perceive and
relate to the world.
How to do it? Many things impact
the regulation of our ANS, such
as the number of hours we sleep,
the type of food we eat, the time
spent in nature, the importance
of exercising our bodies, and so
on. But there is one that is very
accessible and simple, which is our
breath. The breath is one of the
few things we can control directly
from our ANS—it is called
autonomic as it controls most
processes autonomously. Yogis
have known this for ages, using
Pranayama exercises to regulate
themselves and achieve specific
internal experiences.
Here is something you can try:
1
Place one hand on your belly
and the other on your chest.
Notice how your hands move
with your breath for 30 to 60
seconds;
2
Notice now what is the
main tone of your ANS: is it
mobilized (feeling anxious,
irritated, etc.), immobilized
(feeling numb, sad, without energy,
etc.) or regulated (feeling calm,
relaxed, etc.)?
3
According to your
main tone, try one of the
following:
a If your system is mobilized,
close your right nostril and
take some deep in-breaths
from the left nostril, breathing
out slowly through the mouth
(the out-breath should be
longer than the in-breath). Do
this about ten times, and when
you feel more regulated, you
can move to the last step (c).
b If your system is immobilized,
close your left nostril and take
some fast and vigorous breaths
through the right one. Here,
the in-breath should be longer
than the out-breath. Do this
for a minute or two and then
move to the last step (c).
c If your system is regulated,
rest your awareness in the
breath. Breathe in, counting to
4, and breathe out, counting
to 6. If your mind wanders,
bring it back to your breath.
Notice what happens and if
it allows you to become more
grounded.
Another beneficial practice
I recommend, especially if
you’re feeling mobilized, is
Heartfulness Relaxation,
which you can try on your
own at https://bit.ly/hfnrelax.
Expanding to the Mind and
Community
Now we’ll expand to the inner
and outer worlds, specifically our
minds and our relationships with
other people.
If you are like most
Starting with your mind, take
a moment to notice all the people, you’ll notice
different “inner movements” that
might be present. If you are like
that your mind is
most people, you’ll notice that inhabited by many
your mind is inhabited by many
different voices, thoughts, images, different voices,
and other phenomena. It is almost
like there are many different thoughts, images,
people living inside your heads.
And they do not always agree
and other
with one another. Maybe a part phenomena.
of you wants to be reading this,
while another is bored and wants
to check social media. Or a part of
you wants to go out and eat with
friends, while another wants to
stay home alone and order pizza.
Maybe one is compassionate,
loving, and kind, and another is
aggressive and has nasty thoughts
toward others or yourself. This
multiplicity of the mind is not
only normal but expected.2 It is
not a sign of trauma, or something
wrong with you.
The first thing I invite you to do
is stop fighting your thoughts and
these inner parts.
The second thing I invite you to
consider is that all these parts
actually have good intentions. Yes,
including the one that criticizes
Feb r uar y 2 024 21
SELF-CAR E
you, the other that is selfish
toward others, and even the one
that sometimes makes you do
things that you are not proud
of, like engaging in addictive
behaviors—food, drugs, sex,
pornography, shopping, work,
and so on. What would happen
if you discovered that all these
parts are, in fact, trying to help
you? Maybe the inner critic is
just making sure it criticizes us
first to ensure that others do not
criticize us later. Or that the one
who is using addictions is just
trying to distract us from feeling
the pain (physical or emotional)
or the negative beliefs we carry
inside.
Perhaps the one who shows
up as arrogant, or shows a cold
and closed face to others is
protecting a vulnerable part
inside that was hurt in the
past and pledged to make
sure that you would not show
Perhaps the one who shows up
as arrogant, or shows a cold
and closed face to others is
protecting a vulnerable part
inside that was hurt in the past
and pledged to make sure that
you would not show
vulnerability to others anymore.
22
vulnerability to others anymore.
What would change if you
started to relate with these inner
parts from a place of compassion
and understanding?
Here are some practices you
can try in order to regulate your
mind and connect with your
inner world:
1 3
Heartfulness Cleaning:
the practice of cleaning
(https://bit.ly/hfncleaning)
will allow you to let go of all the
complexities and impurities your
parts carry inside, regulating
your mind and increasing your
awareness.
2
Awareness of parts:
notice the parts or sub-
personalities that live
inside you all the time. How do
they manifest? Thoughts, images,
inner voices, color, sensations?
H eart f u l n es s
When you notice one, try to
find where it lives in or around
your body. Is it in the head, the
shoulders, the gut, the Heart,
behind the back? Notice how
it manifests with curiosity and
kindness. What happens when
you pay attention to it without
judgment?
If you find an inner part,
ask it some questions.
Yes, try asking the part
some questions and don’t think
about the answers. Simply notice
if something emerges from
within. For instance, ask it how
old it thinks you are (if it shares
a different number from your
age, you can tell the part your
actual age and update it). Or ask,
“Why do you do what you do?”
Another question that is helpful
is, “What are you afraid would
happen if you didn’t do your
job?”
4
If you want to go a
step further, see if it is
possible to extend some
compassion and understanding
to the part. Let it know with
your inner voice you understand
and respect what it’s trying to do
for you. Notice how it reacts.
5
Last, ask it what it needs
from you—if there is
something you can do
or stop doing in order for it to
relax, as it has been working so
hard to help you.
What would happen if you
could do the same with other
people? To see them beyond
the masks they show in the
world. To realize that all of us
have these different parts that
are trying their best to make us
happy and not suffer.
Try to see beyond the mask
the next time you engage with
someone. Maybe behind the
mask of a highly intellectual part
hides a 7-year-old child who
doesn’t know how to manage
their own emotions. They took
refuge in the conceptual space
since it was safer than feeling
the turbulence in which they
grew up. Maybe behind that
S E LF-CARE
terrifying bully hides a scared
We are all
and vulnerable child who is
afraid of being too fragile. trying our
Perhaps behind a highly
perfectionist part lies a child best, and
who believes they are never
enough. deep inside,
We are all trying our best, and
we all want
deep inside, we all want to be to be seen,
seen, valued, and loved. Can you
see beyond the mask? valued, and
What happens when you allow loved.
some heartful wishes to be
directed toward the people
around you? Try with your inner
voice to wish them well: it can
be as simple as “May they be
happy; may they be free from
suffering; may they be at peace”.
Notice how it profoundly
impacts how you feel, and how
it allows you to sense into our
common humanity.
To be continued.
1.
According to the Polyvagal Theory
developed by Stephen Porges, Ph.D. More
info here: https://www.polyvagalinstitute.
org/whatispolyvagaltheory.
2.
According to several psychotherapeutic
approaches, such as Internal Family
Systems, developed by Richard Schwartz,
Ph.D. More info: https://ifs-institute.com/
Feb r uar y 2 024 23

A
s a child, one activity I
relished was to play with
my friends on the street.
This would typically occupy the
entire evening, and I would return
home well after dusk. The exact
activities did not matter. That we
did it together mattered.
One such evening, when I was
about twelve years of age, I fell
down while playing with my
friends. I immediately got up,
brushed the dust off my clothes
and continued running around.
When I returned home two hours
Where
later, my mother stared at my legs
and asked, “What happened?” I
Attention
looked down and saw that my
knee was badly scraped, blood had
oozed out of the wound reaching
Goes,
my feet and had dried up as well.
Energy
I recall clutching my leg to cry, for
I could feel the throbbing pain in
my knees. The injury seemed to
Flows!
come alive the moment I noticed
it. The day passed, and I forgot
all about this incident until a
few years ago, when the memory
SRIRAM RAGHAVENDRAN popped up out of nowhere.
remembers a childhood
incident that helped When I reflected on this small,
him understand how insignificant incident, several
we perceive pain and questions came up:
suffering, and how we
can unlock our potential. Why did I not experience the pain
while playing, after scraping my
knee?
Why should I feel the throbbing
pain the moment I realized I had
scraped my knee?
AI generated image
24 H eart f u l n es s
Can there be pain without
suffering? Can there be suffering
without pain?
This reflection led me to
appreciate the difference between
pain and suffering. Pain is what
is there; suffering is what we
consciously experience. On that
evening, the pain must have
been there from the moment I
scraped my knee, but there was
no suffering because I was not
conscious of the pain. It is in the
consciousness of the pain that we
suffer.
Physical pain, hardships,
relationships, conflict: there are
very many things that trouble us in
life. There is no getting away from
the pain these things cause. We
need to pay attention to the issue
causing the pain. But it seems that
we can pay too much attention, or
too little.
Too little attention delays the
resolution of the problem,
extending the pain. On the
contrary, the more we brood and
obsess over a problem, the bigger
it seems to get, blowing up the
suffering. I sometimes end up
making a problem so big that I
find myself left with no energy
to do any work. By moderating
our attention and swinging into
surgical action, the problem is
solved quickly.
Feb r uar y 2 024
S E LF-CARE
Where attention goes, energy
flows! Through our attention and
attitude, we can make a mountain
out of a mole hill or a mole hill
out of a mountain.
When someone inquired of Babuji
(one of the Heartfulness guides)
about his stomach ache, he replied,
“Now that you have reminded me
of my stomach ache, I can feel the
pain!” It helps to focus on things
that inspire us, elevate us, motivate
us, to work on things that deliver
tangible results, and moderate
the level of attention given to the
things that trouble us.
One of my favorite quotes is,
“Always look toward the light. For
when we turn away from the light,
we see our own shadow.”
The key to reducing our suffering
and unlocking our potential is
the way we manage ourselves on
the mental and emotional plane.
A greater level of awareness to
understand what we are going
through, the agility of the mind
to redirect attention, a developed
will to swing us into action
rather than brood, all make us
productive, effective, and happy.
These are some of the attributes
I have developed through a
regular and systematic practice of
Heartfulness.
25
 26

inspiration

Love cannot remain by

itself—it has no meaning.
Love has to be put into
action and that action is
service.

MOTHER TERESA

26
 LETTERS TO FAMILY AND FRIENDS
THE NATURE OF
Higher Consciousness
Dear Dad,
What does it mean to experience
higher states of consciousness?
Dear Sahaj and Marg,
In my previous letter, I said that consciousness is all about awareness;
rather, it is the degree of awareness, which also means the degree of
unawareness, and how we respond to situations with that awareness. Based
on this, the least aware is the least evolved.
In addition, some people are aware but do not respond. For example, a
person notices someone is hungry, and their heart melts. They feel sad, but
they rush back home. Their heart is kind, but not kind enough to respond
with a solution. From this angle, non-violence is great but compassion is
greater.
Let us look at it from another perspective. Consciousness can also be seen
as an indicator of inner freedom. Inner freedom means the absence of
cognitive biases, preconditioning, or samskaras. How do you feel when you
have done something against the feelings of your heart? For example, when
you hurt someone with the most powerful weapons – telling the bitter truth,
reminding someone time and again about their follies, or saying, “I told
you so!” It is well known that whenever we do anything against the feelings
of the heart, we suffer the consequences. The heart sinks, and our feelings
28 H eart f u l n es s
I N S P I RATIO N
turn heavier, affecting our free-flowing consciousness. Even free-flowing
consciousness is not the ultimate, as it has yet to become still, poised, and
ripple-free.
Neuroplasticity, flexible consciousness, and the elastic nature of consciousness
all mean the ability to adjust to the external and internal environment.
Buddhism described this as “beginner’s mind.”
The lack of this ability means we become either more and more extroverted or
more and more introverted. An introverted nature is extreme, even though it
is oriented toward the inner life. Introverts tend to be irresponsible toward
worldly life and responsibilities. An extroverted nature is another extreme, like
the two ends of a stick. The ability to move in both directions as per the need
means mastery over circumstances, balancing both the spiritual and material
wings of existence.
At times when we feel at ease and comfortable, do we find the need to change
or transform? Only when we face adverse situations do we see the need to
change, which is natural. This in turn will push us to do one or more of
three things: change the circumstances that cause the adversity, change our
understanding, and learn to adapt.
Mastery of consciousness is also reflected in our ability to rise above the
dwandwas [dualities] of likes-dislikes, peace-restlessness, love-hate, courage-
fear. In short, this is mastery over maya. Will there ever be a day in this
objective world when we will not react toward the feelings, words, actions,
intentions, and attitudes of others? The day we master the art of holding
ourselves when required and expressing ourselves with a noble stand will be the
most blessed in life. The principle and the precise mechanism are understood
well, but the practical implementation is another matter. Our life runs on a
simple principle – external stimulus and our inner reaction or response.
From this angle, we see that mastery over consciousness is also about
controlling our reactions and responses. In short, this is the aspect of mastery
over the ego.
Feb r uar y 2 024 29
Will an evolved person say, “I am too weak to tolerate these circumstances,” or
“I cannot hear this,” or “I cannot take this insult,” or “I am unable to see eye to
eye with so-and-so”? Such an attitude will not come to the surface. An evolved
person will not want to take revenge, nor will they want to hurt anyone. Such an
individual is above and beyond the reactions to which most people succumb. The
heart of such a person is graced with a special mantle, and every atom of that
mantle is charged with courage and infinite optimism due to the high level of
confidence such a person has in their Maker.
We get into trouble and a lot of pain when we are betrayed or misunderstood
by a close associate. The closer the associate, the greater the pain. A typical
situation is where you are facing a cliff on one side, and on the other a lion
is waiting for you! You are going to get affected no matter what. What can
be done? What sort of response is the wisest? You must study the situation and
respond to it, seeing how to salvage the damage, always giving the benefit of the
doubt to the other. If a simple apology can solve the matter, you may consider
yourself lucky.
Moreover, not reacting impulsively creates a very special condition within. Our
heart muscles are forged in the cave of misery. So, there is nothing wrong with
becoming angry; the only thing is to be able to hold it and restrain yourself
from expressing it. Not expressing your anger makes you stronger.
Dear Sahaj and Marg,
Adding to the previous letter, I would like to share with you some of the
great qualities of dear Babuji. Such qualities also indirectly reflect an
evolved state of consciousness.
His work demanded that he perceive the needs of others. He could work
spiritually and make the person feel at home, at peace. During his period
of abhyas [spiritual practice], he could perceive the work done by his
Master ahead of time. The moment Lalaji Maharaj arrived, he would
adjust himself, put on his cap, and become receptive.
Often, before Lalaji could finish his thought or question, Babuji would
perceive it all clearly and offer a solution. In praise of his level of
consciousness, Swami Vivekananda remarked that it would be difficult
for a saint of the highest caliber to even approach Babuji’s lowest state
of consciousness.
So, from this angle, it is also about developing sensitivity, the art of
feeling the needs of others, and responding with the appropriate measures.
I think it is enough for now.

Evolved consciousness is akin to a beautiful silk thread, yet it is stronger than Lots of love,
a steel fiber. “Vajradapi kathorani mruduni kusumadapi [more resolute and Dad
stronger than a diamond, yet more tender and sensitive than a flower]” was the
description defining Lord Rama’s consciousness. Sensitive to spiritual and
worldly duties, while at the same time more and more capable of withstanding
the onslaughts of day-to-day life.

The explanation has become rather long. I hope I could narrate the traits
associated with a higher consciousness.

With lots of love,

Dad

30 H eart f u l n es s Feb r uar y 2 024 31


Are We
Taking Care
of Each Other?
LAURA OTIS is Professor of English at
Emory University, Atlanta, Georgia.
She integrates scientific and literary
thinking, and is especially interested
in multisensory imagery and
emotions. Here she is interviewed by
KASHISH KALWANI, a former student
of Professor Otis, about the ethics of
care.
32
Q: Welcome, Professor Otis.
Could you please share a little
bit about your background
and your interest in ethics and
care?
At university, I studied
biochemistry and neuroscience.
Then I had a huge crisis, and
ended up with a Ph.D. in
comparative literature. So my
research and teaching involve
the intersection of literature and
science. I became interested in
caregiving because my mother
developed early onset dementia
in her early 60s, and that led
to an interest in seeing how
caregiving is represented in
stories, novels, and plays, how
people create narratives around
caregiving, how realistic they
are, and the ethics involved in
representing caregiving. That’s
what brought me to the course
at Emory.
Q: How do you find that
literature and neuroscience
have formed your
understanding and approach
to care and ethics, in
academics and everyday life?
H eart f u l n es s
Literature and science evoke
compassion in different ways.
Science reminds us of what we
all have in common. A lot of
people in literary studies think
that everything is influenced or
even determined by culture and
language, but when you think
about how brains work, you
realize that anyone’s brain can
develop problems.
As we age, we develop similar
problems. Seeing the things
that can go wrong with the
human nervous system evokes
tenderness in me. I realize how
precious and beautiful it is, and
want to take care of it, not abuse
it. When I see someone who
has trouble moving or thinking,
I think that everything wrong
with that person’s nervous
system could go wrong with
mine, or with anybody I know.
Science is a reminder of what we
have in common.
Literature opens my mind to
different ways of looking at
caregiving and understanding or
experiencing disease that might
not otherwise have occurred to
me.
Feb r uar y 2 024
I N S P I RATIO N
Q: This conversation
is especially relevant
with climate change,
wars, economic crises,
homelessness, and more. In
your opinion, what would be
the key ethical responsibilities
of leaders when it comes
to caring for others, in
community, organizational,
and family settings?
First, make sure that you’re well
informed, not just listening
to yes-people. Nowadays,
we have good information
about how people are living in
communities, involving feedback
from the community groups.
Be open and willing to listen to
what’s happening.
There are different political
philosophies about how
responsible leaders are for
the welfare of others. There’s
everything on the spectrum from
every person for himself to the
government’s responsibility for
everyone. And I fall somewhere
in the middle.
Listen to people, and then be
ready to muster government
resources to help. It’s best and
33
INSP I RAT IO N
probably cheapest if done in
a proactive way. Rather than
waiting for the next hurricane
or disaster, find out what
caused so much suffering in the
last disaster and keep it from
happening again.
Q: How do global issues such
as climate change, inequality,
and wars impact our ethical
obligations toward care, both
at an individual and collective
level?
Countries that have contributed
the most to global warming
probably have a responsibility to
help people who are suffering,
like those whose countries are
about to disappear because of
rising sea levels, those who’ve
had to leave their homes. Money
is finite, and even rich countries
may not have much money to
spare. But they can take into
consideration what’s going on.
We can probably help more
immigrants than we might
believe. It’s not that we should
open the border and let everyone
come in, but we can invest more
resources in processing people,
evaluating whether they have a
right to come.
We need to do concrete things
to help people who are affected
by climate change and wars,
rather than being reactive. How
can we stop the causes? Can
we move faster toward green
energy?
34
Literature opens
my mind to
different ways of
looking at
caregiving and
understanding or
experiencing
disease that might
not otherwise have
occurred to me.
Q: Thank you for talking about
the global scale. You said that
your mother had dementia, so
how did you approach her care
while also dealing with your
world and the world outside?
The worst time with dementia
is when the patient is still trying
to live the life they had before,
not in an assisted living facility.
Once the person is in an assisted
living facility (if the family
makes that choice), everything
is easier. The transition time
of deciding what we would
do, where she would go to get
the care she needed, coincided
with me trying to get tenure in
my academic career, which is
when expectations are extremely
H eart f u l n es s
high. You’re getting evaluated
all the time. I was also in a
psychologically abusive marriage
and trying to leave. During that
period, I thought very little about
the world.
I pulled back, so there’s a void in
my knowledge of current events
between 1993 and 1995. It’s a
natural human response—you
feel threatened, so you focus on
yourself. But I don’t recommend
that. The irony is that it may
actually help to think beyond
yourself. I know that now. I didn’t
know that then.
Q: What changes would you
like to see in the way societies
approach care?
I N S P I RATIO N
No stigmas. No stigma for our interactions with family we also need care. It’s tough
taking care of somebody and friends. And hopefully that because we’re raised to “have
yourself, no stigma in saying knowledge continues to develop it together.” No one has time
no. No stigma against quitting as we grow. Some people are for our mess, everyone’s having
your job because you want to better at it than others, but at a rough life, so we have to
take care of your family. No any point in life we can learn
stigma against deciding that how to treat other people.
handle it on our own. We have
to ask: How can I take care of
your family member needs to Build a network that grows ever myself?
live in an assisted care facility. outward. It’s most logical to start
Care choices should be open with your family and friends That’s right. Also, I’d say, be
to whatever works best for the in your community, but don’t careful asking people if they
family. necessarily be satisfied with that. need anything, because you may
Keep expanding the circle. not get an honest answer.
I would love to see the stigma
taken away from assisted living, Q: I agree. It’s easier to ask
what used to be called nursing someone how they would
homes; no shame if a family like to receive care than to
chooses to do this because they ask for help ourselves, but
can no longer provide the care.
I’d like to see more affordable
assisted living options. We need
creativity to set that up because
people are living longer, and
Care choices
they need care in the last part of
their lives. It’s not something we should be open
can improvise.
to whatever
I feel sorry for people who don’t
have the money for assisted works best for
living. They have to figure it
out themselves. I’d like to see
the family.
more social and government
involvement in care and more
affordable options.
Q: So how do we take care of
each other? How do we ask for
help?
Start with the people nearest
you and work outward. We
learn how to treat others from
Feb r uar y 2 024 35
INSP I R AT IO N
We can always take better care
of each other. Where there are
cultural forces involved, there’s
a delicate balance. In America,
the idea of taking care of each
other is that we’re all supposed
to take care of ourselves. Some
people experience an offer of
help as invasive or disrespectful.
If someone suddenly wants to
take care of them, even within
a relationship, there may be
conflict. They do not want to
be taken care of. There can be
exploitation, too. Some people
expect to be taken care of, which
is not good either. Be aware of
the interpersonal and cultural
forces that shape the issues
around care.
I confess, I don’t respond well
when people try to take care
of me. I find it disrespectful.
But when I’ve needed help, it
hasn’t bothered me at all. I’ve
been grateful. I was in a traffic
accident in 2000; I was riding
my bike when a truck ran over
my foot. People immediately
stopped what they were doing
to help, and I appreciated that; I
had no problem.
It’s difficult judging when to
help. When I’ve seen other
people in accidents, I’ve dropped
what I was doing so I could
help, because I appreciated what
people did for me. But I’m also
sensitive to people’s pride in
their privacy. All you can do is
give your best judgment.
36
Q: You are the author of many
books. Has there been any
ethical or moral dilemma that
arose within the characters
and themes of your books?
Probably all of them! The one
that comes to mind is the most
recent one, Banned Emotions.
The first line of that book is,
“What are the politics of telling
people what to feel?”
It grew out of a personal story.
I’d had a bad breakup, and
everybody had advice about
what I should do. People were
telling me what to feel and in
We can always
take better care
of each other.
Where there are
cultural forces
involved, there’s a
delicate balance.
H eart f u l n es s
I N S P I RATIO N
what time frame, and it bothered
me. Luckily, I thought outward,
rather than just getting mad, and
It’s worthwhile paying
realized how much people try attention to your own
to control their emotions and
dictate the emotions of others. emotions because it
The ethical dimension for me
is: what right do I have to say helps you understand
what another person should be
feeling? I haven’t experienced other people who are
what they experienced.
feeling similar emotions.
I wrote about patterns and
emotions like long-term
simmering anger, self-pity,
envy, etc., which are socially
discouraged. We’re not supposed
to feel them, especially self-pity.
Also, the advice not to feel those what you’re really telling them is forward, you’re not supposed to
things doesn’t go equally to all; it to suppress their anger at injustice. hold onto things. You’re supposed
tends to go toward the people who to let go and move on. And if it
have the least power. Women have That’s not going to cause justice makes you feel sorry for yourself,
very often been told what they suddenly to bloom. It’s a kind it may actually help you to keep
should and should not be feeling. of censorship, stopping critique. going. If you never get beyond the
Sianne Ngai at the University of feeling of outrage, then that’s not
One example is, “Life is not Chicago wrote a book called Ugly going to do anybody any good. If
fair.” Parents tell children, prison Feelings, and she said that if you’re it helps you to heal, though, then
guards tell prisoners, teachers tell telling people with less power that why not? We don’t have a right to
students; it doesn’t move the other they’re not allowed to feel certain tell people what they should be
way. I can’t imagine a kid telling emotions, you’re preventing social feeling to heal.
her parents, “Life is not fair,” if critique.
something happens that the parent It’s worthwhile paying attention
doesn’t like. It’s like that with Q: That is so powerful. to your own emotions because it
emotions. “Oh, you’re wallowing in helps you understand other people
self-pity,” and the person may have It’s complicated because people on who are feeling similar emotions.
a very good reason to feel sorry for the other side will say, “Well, what
themself, or to feel angry. When good did self-pity ever do anyone?” Q: I guess that is how we take
you feel that way, it’s because But if nobody seems to be on your care of each other.
you’ve experienced injustice. When side, it’s reasonable to feel sorry for
you tell people, “You have no right yourself and say, “I hurt. This isn’t
to feel sorry for yourself, you have fair.” These are reasonable things
no right to be angry over this, you to think, as long as they’re healing
need to have positive emotions,” you. You’re supposed to be moving
Feb r uar y 2 024 37
Workplace
The most important single
ingredient in the formula
of success is knowing how
to get along with people.

THEODORE ROOSEVELT
 WO RK P LAC E

The Lone
Ranger
DR. ICHAK ADIZES comes up with a surprising
solution for working together for growth and
prosperity, and caring for all concerned.
I
n navigating the complexities of
leadership, one often encounters
the perplexing case of the
“indispensable” employee. These
are the dedicated individuals who
put in over 60 hours a week and
whose departure requires a team
of three for replacement. At first
glance, their dismissal might seem
like a loss, both in terms of human
effort and financial prudence. Yet,
experience and reflection bring to
light a different narrative.
The Adizes Institute recognizes
that the dedication of such
individuals often masks a critical
inefficiency. This Lone Ranger,
while admirable in their tenacity,
may inadvertently create a
bottleneck, hindering the flow of
processes and delaying essential
decisions. Their work style,
characterized by linear focus and
reactive prioritization, can lead to
a cascade of missed opportunities
and stifled team potential.
It's a common managerial
conundrum: when does hard
work cross the line from asset to
liability? The answer lies not in the
number of hours worked but in the with these thoughts, know
effectiveness of those hours. The that this is just the surface of
balanced workload distribution transformative insights we offer.
and the seamless delegation of
tasks best measure efficiency.
Through our insights into ichak@adizes.com
organizational dynamics, we
suggest a paradigm shift from https://www.ichakadizes.com/
valuing sheer effort to appreciating post/what-did-i-learn-this-week
intelligent, strategic work.
The goal is to foster a work While the Adizes
environment where productivity
is not solely the responsibility of Institute offers
one but the collective triumph of a
well-coordinated team. pathways to
While the Adizes Institute offers enhance these
pathways to enhance these aspects
of organizational life, the more
aspects of
excellent value lies in the shared organizational life,
understanding and insight we
bring to light together. It’s about the more excellent
recognizing that, sometimes,
letting go of what seems value lies in the
indispensable opens the door to
a more dynamic and prosperous
shared
organizational structure. understanding and
We invite you to reflect on insight we bring to
these observations within your
enterprises. If you find resonance light together.

40 H eart f u l n es s Feb r uar y 2 024 41


Following up on last month’s article, STANISLAS LAJUGIE shares
details about our sleep patterns and what is needed to create a
really healthy sleep routine.
How Is Your
SLEEP
If you want to follow
your dreams, go to sleep
early
I
n the 1950s, after conducting
Health?
experiments on rats that were
later confirmed on humans,
scientists discovered that we
did not have a continuous and
consistent pattern of brainwave
activity during sleep. Instead, the
brainwave patterns fluctuated
between periods of higher-
frequency waves, similar to
wakeful brain activity, and periods
of low-frequency waves, typical of
deep sleep.
The sleep periods resembling
wakeful states were characterized
by rapid and irregular eye
movements, and dreams. This
type of sleep was called rapid eye
movement or REM sleep. During
the other periods, brain activity
42 H eart f u l n es s
was slow and the body completely
relaxed with no movement of the
eyes. This state was called deep or
NREM sleep.
During NREM sleep, the body
repairs itself. Tissues regenerate,
the immune system rejuvenates,
and energy levels replenish. The
brain consolidates memories and
learning from the day, and expels
neurotoxins.
Indeed, deep NREM sleep is
the brain’s cleanup phase. Brain
activity and blood circulation
decrease, permitting the
glymphatic system (clears waste
products and toxins from the
brain) to facilitate the exchange
of cerebrospinal fluid (CSF) and
interstitial fluid (ISF) in the brain.
During this phase, ISF volume
increases by 60%, flushing the
brain and eliminating waste.
Feb r uar y 2 024
WO RK P LACE
Research reveals that the
glymphatic system also aids
memory consolidation, potentially
explaining sleep’s role in
brain health. Prolonged sleep
deprivation can impair this,
allowing toxic waste buildup that
contributes to cognitive decline
and neurological disorders,
including Alzheimer’s.
The initial stage of sleep and
transitory phases are light REM
sleep, followed by progressively
deeper states. During REM
sleep, brain activity heightens,
accompanied by rapid eye
movement. This phase is
characterized by dreams and
flashbacks, testing all scenarios,
and allowing vital processing and
memorization of emotions.
The World Health Organization
recommends seven to nine
43
 WOR K P L AC E
Stages of Sleep
REM
20 to 25% or 1.5 to 2 hours.
Dreaming. Emotional processing
& emotional memory
consolidation.
N3
Deep NREM sleep.
20 to 25% or 1.5 to 2 hours.
Most restorative & healing.
Brain cleansing &
memory consolidation.
hours of sleep for adults, though
individual needs may differ. Sleep
quality also matters. A fulfilling
night’s sleep contains multiple
cycles of deep sleep and light
sleep, essential for physical and
mental revitalization. An average
sleep cycle spans 90 minutes,
44
45 to 55% or 3.5 to 4.4 hours.
with around four to five cycles
in a 24-hour span for optimal
rejuvenation. Uninterrupted sleep,
devoid of frequent awakenings, is
equally crucial.
Quality of sleep is not only about
how long we sleep, but also when
we sleep. The circadian rhythm
H eart f u l n es s
N1
Light NREM sleep.
5% or 20 to 25 minutes.
Transition to sleep.
N2
Deeper NREM sleep.
Progressing deeper.
is the natural, internal process
that regulates the sleep-wake
cycle and various physiological
and behavioral processes in living
organisms, including humans, on
a daily basis. The main gland that
regulates the circadian rhythm
is the pineal gland. Located
deep within the brain, the pineal
gland plays a crucial role in the
regulation of various physiological
processes, including the sleep-
wake cycle and the production of
the hormone melatonin.
The pineal gland receives signals
from a cluster of neurons in the
hypothalamus (SCN) that acts as
the body’s master biological clock.
The SCN receives information
about the external light-dark cycle
through the eyes’ retinal cells,
which then communicate this
information to the pineal gland.
When darkness falls, the SCN
signals the pineal gland to increase
its production of melatonin,
and the rise in melatonin
levels promotes drowsiness and
prepares the body for sleep. As
morning approaches and light
levels increase, the SCN signals
the pineal gland to decrease
melatonin production, promoting
wakefulness. In this way, the pineal
gland’s secretion of melatonin
serves as a key component of the
An average sleep cycle spans 90 minutes,
with around four to five cycles in a 24-hour
span for optimal rejuvenation.
WO RK P LACE
circadian rhythm, helping to align
internal biological processes with
the external day-night cycle.
What is your sleep
health? 9 to 10.30 p.m.
80% NREM and 20% REM
When we sleep has an effect on
our circadian rhythm. If we go
to sleep after 11 p.m., we will
not get the longest duration
of NREM sleep, in particular
N3 (very deep sleep), the stage
most associated with physical 10.30 p.m. to 12 a.m.
restoration and recovery. During 60% NREM and 40% REM
N3 sleep, the body engages in
critical processes like cell repair,
growth, and immune system
support, and the brain’s glymphatic
system is most active. Deep sleep
also plays a vital role in memory
consolidation, particularly for 12 to 1.30 a.m.
declarative memory (facts, 50% NREM and 50% REM
events, experiences). Emotional
processing and regulation are also
linked to deep sleep, helping to
modulate emotional responses
and potentially reset the brain’s
emotional state.
1.30 to 3 a.m.
40% NREM and 60% REM
3 to 4.30 a.m.
20% NREM and 80% REM
The S ch e d u le o f t h e
P i n e a l Gla n d
Feb r uar y 2 024 45
WOR K P L AC E
Sleeping early supports metabolic
functions and helps regulate
hormones involved in appetite
control, metabolism, and stress
response. Disrupting these
processes by sleeping late can
potentially lead to metabolic
imbalances and increased stress.
Melatonin secretion increases in
the evening, promoting sleepiness.
If we’re awake and exposed to
light when our bodies expect
darkness, melatonin levels may
remain elevated, leading to
feelings of fatigue, and a mismatch
between our internal clock and
external environment. Instead of
feeling energetic in the morning,
melatonin presence may persist,
making it difficult to wake.
Not getting the necessary NREM
sleep can contribute to mood
disturbances, like irritability, mood
swings, and potential mental
health issues.
In summary, when we consistently
go to bed after 11 p.m., we miss
out on the critical early-night
NREM sleep stages, which can
have a cascading impact on
various aspects of our health and
functioning.
If you need to make adjustments
to your sleep schedule, it’s
recommended to do it gradually
over a period of time, to allow your
body to adapt to the changes.
46
Meditation: a gateway
to enhanced sleep and
brain function
To become a sleep champion
requires a healthy lifestyle: going
to sleep early and for long enough,
a balanced work life, regular
exercise, reduced coffee and tea
consumption, a timely and light
diet.
Additionally, meditation brings
many benefits for sleep quality and
brain functioning, including stress
reduction1, enhanced sleep quality2,
circadian rhythm alignment3, and
daytime vitality4.
1
Jindal et al., 2016; Tang et al., 2015; Winbush et al., 2007; Ong et al., 2008.
2
Black et al., 2015; Gong et al., 2016.
3
Burke et al., 2015.
4
Colzato et al., 2015; Mrazek et al., 2013.
H eart f u l n es s
Moral of the story?
Striking a Balance
The lesson is clear: sleep’s
intelligence far surpasses our
comprehension. Ignoring it could
hasten our journey toward an
early end. In the grand mosaic
of existence, sleep is not a waste
of time for the busy, but a vital
need. Our physical and mental
well-being dance to its rhythm,
Work, Life, and You
and meditation may well be
the conductor guiding us to
harmonious rest. DR. SNEHAL DESHPANDE has been a developmental therapist in
the field of Pediatric Physiotherapy for 30 years. She deals with
families whose children explore their potential in a very different
way, and working with these families has given her resilience and
helped her learn adaptive mechanisms. She is the Director of
CME and other Healthcare initiatives for Heartfulness Institute,
and here shares her insights on work-life balance with her team.
WOR K P L AC E
Q. You have been a professional
for more than 30 years, what
does work mean to you?
As a physiotherapist, wife, and
mother, work has been an integral
part of what I call “me.” My
mother instilled in me that work
is worship; if you want to worship
God, worship what you are doing.
Having this ingrained in me from
childhood, I decided that whatever
I did in life, I should work. There
was no difference between what
we call work life and family life.
Work is work, joy, and happiness.
Most of us spend 40% of our
lives working. We should like our
workplace, because it’s another
home. But do we really treat our
workplaces as home, where we
can relax? When we are relaxed,
we can give our best. When
we compare our behavior and
attitudes at work and at home,
we realize that we need to change
things to lead a life that is aligned
and balanced.
Q: Treating the workplace as
a second home is an amazing
"If you want to
worship God,
worship what you
are doing."
48
way to enjoy our work. Yet many
people find that difficult. What
are the possible reasons for
that?
We think that work is different
from the rest of our lives and
create a distance between
ourselves and work. Work is not
different from us. The question
is: why do we do a particular
job? Undoubtedly, there is no
“impossible” in the human spectra,
but sometimes we do things
which we don’t want to do. We
do it because we want to earn
a livelihood, or because of our
parents, our peer group, or other
social pressures.
As an example, we may say,
“Because she is a CA, I want to
H eart f u l n es s
become a CA,” or “Because my
father wants me to be a doctor, I
will become a doctor.” But what
do we want to do? What does the
inner self want to do? Do we ask
ourselves these questions? And
“What is it that I want to do that
will improve the greater good
of humanity?” If we ask these
questions, and treat our work as
something that allows us to make
the change for which we are here,
I’m sure our work-life balance, the
core of work life integration, as we
say, can be solved.
Q: Why do you think it is
necessary to have integration
between work and life in this
generation?
Stress. It’s the biggest word that
hits Google. How do we build
stress? How do we build work-
related stress? In the beginning it
is unimaginable. When we take
up a career, we say, “Oh, wow,
I’m a doctor,” or “I’ve become an
engineer,” but when we start really
working, it becomes a tragedy.
We meet friends and say, “This is
happening at work,” or “Shifts are
there,” or “I’m not liking my job.”
Work-related stress is now one of
the biggest concerns.
Work-life balance is ultimately
created by our choices. By agreeing
to take on more work when we
don’t have the capacity, or cannot
delegate that work, we create
stress for ourselves. Improving our
work-life balance improves our
mental health, because it helps us
to become organized. It helps us to
compartmentalize; our wardrobes
becomes user friendly, our houses
become neat, etc. Having balance
means having better physical,
mental, emotional, occupational,
and intellectual health. Wellness
covers all aspects. And even
working on one of them definitely
works on all aspects of well-being.
Q: Can you share some well-
being tips with us?
Accept that this is going to be
the life I will lead.
Be creative in your workplace.
Feel free to do something good
every single day at work. Simple
things like a bunch of flowers
and keeping photos of your loved
ones will make you happy.
Seek support at work. Asking
for help does not mean you are
incapable. It says, “I’m here.
I’m new. Let’s walk this way
together.”
Create a schedule, something
that modern life thrives upon.
Include your morning wake up
time, your exercise routine,
meditation time, and travel time.
A schedule will help you make
use of that travel time, and arrive
at work 15 minutes early.
Chart out where you want to
go. Think about what will help
you to do better. What really
helps you do better is to give of
yourself. Then you feel like you
are contributing and you feel
Feb r uar y 2 024
WO RK P LACE
happy about it. Find purpose in
your work, and your workplace
will automatically become a
happy place.
Create boundaries so your
work does not creep into your
home space.
Switch off your gadgets to
give yourself some “me” time.
Your brain needs time to rewire.
Instead of scrolling through your
mobile, talk to a friend or family
member, or just be quiet.
These are a few tricks I follow
to integrate my personal and
professional life. By fine-tuning
things we can maintain harmony
and joy in the long run.
"Work-life balance
is ultimately
created by our
choices."
49
relationships
To be loving is to be open to grief,
to be touched by sorrow, even
sorrow that is unending.

BELL HOOKS

Illustration by JASMEE MUDGAL

 Transforming
Grief
NEERAJA KAIRAM is a physician
based in New Jersey, USA. She
shares with us her gratitude for
the community she has found
as she navigates the complex
emotions surrounding grief, and
builds bridges of understanding.
52 H eart f u l n es s
N
ovember 29, 2020 is
a date etched in my
brain as the day my life
changed forever. My husband,
who had been by my side for
27 years, died suddenly and
unexpectedly at the age of
50. I think of that time as an
inflection point in my life,
before his death (B.D.) and after
(A.D.).
In the three years since, I
have become a different
person. Looking back on the
early days and months, I see
a mix of pain and sorrow,
gratitude, and resilience. I am
still on the journey of navigating
this new life that neither my
kids nor I asked for. Along the
way, I have discovered how
the support of community and
the connections I have formed
allowed me to flourish even in
the most difficult of times.
Feb r uar y 2 024
In the aftermath of his death,
there were so many mixed
and complicated emotions, all
shrouded in a cloud of intense
grief. The sadness, isolation,
fear, and sense of helplessness
overwhelmed me in those early
days. Outwardly, I appeared
fine to many, as I mustered the
strength to put one foot in front
of the other, driven by the sole
purpose of providing stability
for my children.
Balancing this newfound solo
life with a full-time career was
far from easy, especially when I
inherited the task of managing
my late husband’s business. His
employees were also grappling
with losing their beloved boss
and their own anxieties about
their livelihoods, so they looked
to me for leadership. And, the
constant concern for my three
teenagers—now relying on me
as their sole parent—weighed
incessantly.
53

Grief is a complex and often
misunderstood emotion. We
all encounter it at some point
in our lives, yet it remains
challenging to accept and share
openly. The discomfort it brings
to those around us can result in
a heavy burden, as we often feel
compelled to hold our emotions
in. Even the well-intentioned
question of “How are you
doing?” can leave a griever in a
difficult position, unsure how to
respond.
For would-be consolers,
there are also many complex
emotions. In addition to
sympathy and empathy, a sense
of helplessness often stems from
not knowing how to alleviate
the griever’s grief. There is
anxiety about saying the wrong
thing, frustration due to the
inability to find the right words,
awkwardness in not knowing
how to act or what to say, and
54
even a tendency to avoid the
situation to circumvent these
uncomfortable emotions. I have
felt all these things myself.
In our society, it is
uncomfortable to discuss grief,
and often not openly accepted.
So, is there a way to bridge
the gap and foster greater
acceptance and understanding?
It requires us to break down
the walls of separation and
push open dialogues about
grief to the mainstream. In the
end, that journey requires a
collective effort to dismantle
traditional barriers. It is about
recognizing the shared human
experience and acknowledging
the importance of supporting
one another through life’s most
challenging moments.
I was fortunate to have key
people in my life who provided
crucial support. They offered
H eart f u l n es s
It is about
recognizing the
shared human
experience and
acknowledging
the importance
of supporting
one another
through life’s
most challenging
moments.
solace and guidance, and insisted
I take moments of self-care.
Despite their unwavering
presence, I still grappled with
an overwhelming sense of
aloneness, a feeling that no
one could truly understand
the depth of my loss unless
they had walked a similar path
themselves. It wasn’t just the loss
of my husband, my best friend,
and the anchor of support for
my children. It was also the loss
of the future we had envisioned
together. I lost my partner in
travel, music concerts, and other
adventures. I dealt with the
loss of my identity in the world
without him, and the loss of a
clear sense of purpose in my life.
Not long after my husband’s
passing, a former colleague and
friend, who had recently lost her
husband to cancer, introduced
me to an online support group
for physician widows. Initially,
the word “widow” bore the
weight of sorrow, but with time,
it came to represent strength and
resilience. These women gave
me a deep sense of belonging
and understanding. They
empathized with the myriad
of emotions that come with
widowhood—grief, guilt,
fear, “should haves,” and all
the expected and unexpected
triggers. This supportive
community brought me a sense
of normalcy regarding my own
emotions, and allowed me
to extend support to others
enduring similar grief. Recently,
when one of them shared, “I
have lots of people to do things
with, but I have no one to do
nothing with,” it was a moment
of revelation. I connected with
the sentiment, even though I
struggled for so long to find
the right words to express it. In
this community of remarkable
women I found solace and
mutual support.
Support also came from
unexpected sources. I am still in
awe of an experience that took
place a year after my husband’s
passing as we were approaching
the holiday season. Every day
for the 12 days of Christmas, a
gift arrived on our front porch,
accompanied by a card signed,
“Your true friends.” On the
13th day, we received the final
gift that explained the meaning
behind these mysterious
presents, a book called The 13th
Gift by Joanne Huist Smith. In
her book, she shares her own
story of what happened after
her husband passed away just
before Christmas. Like us, her
RE LATIO N S H I P S
family received 12 daily gifts
from strangers that helped them
cope with their grief during the
holiday season. To this day, the
sender of those gifts remains a
mystery, but the impact of this
unexpected gesture of kindness
and compassion has been
permanently cemented in our
hearts.
Looking back on the past three
years, I am reminded of the
people who stood by me when I
wasn’t at my best, who listened
when I needed to be heard,
and who gave me space when I
needed it. They encouraged me
to take each day one breath at
a time. It remains a powerful
testament to the support and
kindness of loved ones and
strangers alike and exemplifies
what it means to truly take care
of each other.
They encouraged
me to take each
day one breath at
a time.
Illustrations by JASMEE MUDGAL

M
y husband and I have
been in the healthcare
industry for over three
decades; he provides home visit
physical therapy services for the
geriatric population and I work
with the Veterans’ Affairs clinic,
where I treat elderly veterans of
war, and young veterans returning
from recent tours. Because of
the nature of our work and our
adaptation to the ever-changing
landscape of geriatric healthcare,
both of us developed what we
believed to be a thick skin to
caretaking.
That thick skin has been tested
and recreated over the last seven
years, after my husband decided to
move his parents, in their eighties,
from India to the US, so we could
care for their growing medical
concerns. Neither of us had any
Aging
apprehension about this caretaker
role, until his parents actually
moved in.
Gracefully
degenerative process that we
SHANTHI VENKAT is a physical therapist based in the United States.
Here, she details how a deeply personal experience as a caregiver undergo physically, mentally,
pushed her to reflect on the stigma around aging and her own
professional work, and the easy steps we can take to prepare ourselves
for growing older.
The months and years following
their arrival have been an
eyeopener for us. Much changed
quickly: the energy in the house
shifted as our lives revolved around
their needs, wants, emotions, and
illnesses. Prior to their arrival, we
were empty nesters planning for
our retirement, but the immensity
of their health issues postponed
those plans indefinitely.
We were also inching closer to
our 60s. Little aches and pains
magnified in intensity, and no
matter how preemptive we were
in managing them, we were not
rebounding quite as quickly.
Neither of us will ever regret
the choice we made to bring my
in-laws here; at the same time,
caretaker burnout is very real.
Whether we were willing to accept
it or not, we were also aging.
What is aging? It is a degenerative
process that we undergo physically,
mentally, and emotionally. The
What is aging? It is a
and emotionally.
Feb r uar y 2 024
RE LATIO N S H I P S
changes do not happen in any
certain pattern or proportion. But
each change does affect the others.
When our physical health is not
good, our mental and emotional
well-being are compromised,
which in turn leads to even poorer
physical health. We get trapped
into a hamster wheel of sickness,
one giant unending cycle.
Aging is hard. It can feel like all
the control and independence built
over several decades is gone in
the blink of an eye. Many elderly
people must make the emotional
adjustment of returning to an
almost childlike state, in which
they constantly have to ask for
help for even the simplest of tasks.
It can be lonely, embarrassing,
frightening, and often completely
unfair.
Aging is also a challenge for
caretakers. I have wondered what
has made the circumstances with
my in-laws so challenging, when
57
REL AT IO N SH I P S
over the past three decades, my
husband and I have helped so
many elderly people rehabilitate
themselves to live healthy,
independent lives. The challenge,
I have realized, is the emotional
attachment we have with family
members. Even when we know
it is coming, it is hard to watch a
parent grow older. It is hard for
the role of parent and child to
reverse. And it is hard to care for
ourselves when our energy is going
toward taking care of someone
else, especially loved ones.
Because of my work, I understand
that aging is a taboo topic, one
that we are hesitant to learn about,
because it is frightening to think
about getting older. We teach
young people how to become
adults. We teach them how to be
financially independent, to save
for retirement, to pay bills, to buy
a house, to build a family. But we
don’t teach them how to age. We
do not successfully educate people
on how to care for the inevitable:
an aging body.
At work I watch young veterans
struggle after being discharged
from service: Their bodies and
minds have physically and
psychologically aged significantly
because of the impact of war, and
they are left feeling hopeless as
they try to navigate life under
different circumstances.
So I encourage you to apply these
five simple steps to keep your
58
bodies and minds healthy and
strong, and preempt the effects of
aging:
1 friends a few times a week, or drop
Exercise regularly:
Even something as simple as a
walk around your neighborhood
can do wonders. I spend an hour
each day walking on the treadmill
or doing strength-training
exercises.
2 support and love.
Find a consistent hobby:
It keeps your mind sharp and
engaged. My husband and I have
green thumbs and spend a lot of
time in our garden.
H eart f u l n es s
3
Spend time with friends:
Every demographic is impacted
by loneliness. Keep your personal
connections strong. I make a point
to pick up the phone and call my
by a friend’s home even just for an
hour.
Even when we know
it is coming, it is
hard to watch a We must do a
parent grow older. better job of taking
It is hard for the care of our aging
4
role of parent and family and friends;
child to reverse. especially in the
Engage in mind-body
last leg of life, activity: Meditation, yoga, and
other contemplative activities
people need can create a fit mind and body.
In addition to my meditation
practice, I became a certified tai
chi instructor a few years ago,
which has been another successful
way of keeping me connected to
myself.
Feb r uar y 2 024
RE LATIO N S H I P S
5
Take time for yourself:
Alone time is necessary to keep
yourself sharp and healthy.
These steps may seem like
common sense, but knowing
what we can do to stay strong
and healthy can help to make the
process of aging more manageable.
When that education is coupled
with compassion, acceptance, and
patience, aging can be graceful. We
must do a better job of taking care
of our aging family and friends;
especially in the last leg of life,
people need support and love.
The last seven years challenged
the way I thought of myself as a
caregiver. More than anything, it
challenged my own perception of
aging, and the ways I was taking
care of myself. After all, I want to
age gracefully too.
Illustrations by JASMEE MUDGAL
59
This world can be compared to our
body. If any organ is diseased, the
whole body is affected.

LALAJI

Illustration by ANANYA PATEL

 E N VI RO N M E N T

The Earth O
ver a span of two weeks
in December, ten With her roots in Vadodara and

We Share
ceramists and sculptors
from around the world gathered
at the Ceramics Center, a not-
for-profit studio established in
Vadodara in 1998. It was among
In December 2023, ten ceramists and sculptors the first of its kind in India,
met to collectively express what it’s like to share a offering support to artists, and at
world in crisis, through their medium of clay, which its heart was Jyotsna Bhatt, the
is so connected to the Earth. ANANYA PATEL was late artist and beloved teacher, who
there to observe the artists in their element, and was integral to the evolution of the
write about the projects they were working on. Ceramic Center and the growth
of the community. The center has
always operated under an ethos
of providing space, infrastructure,
and technical expertise to facilitate
the experimentation and execution
of creative ideas, with a focus on
creative expression rather than
commercial gain.
a long standing relationship with
the Ceramic Center, Falguni
Bhatt conceptualized this edition
of the camp, selected the artists,
and curated the show. “This series
of works explores the theme of
lost landscapes and the impact
of human activity on the natural
world. I seek to highlight the
beauty of the natural environment,
while also drawing attention to the
ways in which we have altered and
destroyed it.”

These ten artists were the second Shalini Dam explores geopolitical narratives in her work. Here she
cohort of the “Remembering prepares the components of her six-meter-long piece exploring the
Jyotsna Bhatt” camp series duality of peace and war through its symbolism in various societies and
in her memory, to bring new cultures.
voices and perspectives to the
center. They united under the
theme, “The Earth We Share,”
collaborating, experimenting and
reflecting on the interconnected
relationships between humans and
the environment, and the issues
emerging from geopolitical tension
and climate change. The camp
culminated in a group exhibition
where the artists invited viewers to
reflect on the beauty and fragility
of the Earth we share. As they
worked, artists reflected on their
creative practice, on working at
the Ceramic Center, on their
interpretation of the theme, and
on what it means to create art in a
collective community setting.

62 H eart f u l n es s Feb r uar y 2 024

ENV IR O N M EN T
Jean Appleby, head of Pottery at
the Heartfulness Institute, came
to the camp to develop an artistic
project.
“From the first time I made art, I
felt some guidance, that the ideas
came to me in full form, not like I
was discovering so much as I was
receiving.”
Recently, the guidance Jean
received led her to explore an
imagined narrative around early
human civilization. She crafted a
collection of objects created and
preserved by early beings to be
discovered and used in the present
day. On creating these vessels for
others to reflect upon, she hoped
to “inspire us to recognize that
64
Dr Julie Bartholomew was
inspired to continue her research
on bees and insect communities.
She started her Habitat series
in 2020 as a response to the loss
of biodiversity, particular insect
life, following the wildfires that
devastated habitats in Australia.
A beekeeper herself, her pieces
are architecturally constructed
working hives that can sustain bee
communities and promote their
population growth.
many beings from many places This interest in bees and their
have inhabited our planet. All collaborative communities is also
beings entrust us to nurture Earth shared by fellow artist, Antra
for all to become ONE.” Sinha. Antra says, “I am intrigued
by the different types of shelter
that exists in our civilization,
and their status. I continue to
think about hives, bees, and
the collaboration that exists in
communities of sentient beings
and compare it to humans.”
Sweta Mansingka adds, “I believe
an artist’s thought has a voice
that rings through their work to
resonate with its audience. The
artwork is an expression of that
minimalism that hopes to provoke
the viewer to reflect and delve
deeper within. My ceramic works
are in reverence and gratitude to
our life force or energy, to Nature,
and our planet Earth.”
H eart f u l n es s Feb r uar y 2 024 65
ENV I RO N M EN T E N VI RO N M E N T

Khageswar Rout is inspired by the

unique materiality of the medium:
“All the natural elements work
together to create a ceramic piece.
It emerges from the earth, and
water gives it malleability, without
which you cannot shape it. Air
To me exploring a dries it in place, but keeps it fragile
and tenuous, until it is cast in fire
new material and to give it strength and hold its
form.”
pushing its limits is
He, along with others,
just like exploring a
observed that in India, very few
new friendship community-centered studios exist,
where artists have the opportunity
Indrani Singh Cassime shared to work on equal ground, share
her insights on the artistic ideas and knowledge, and draw Art is meant to be After just a few days in each
collaborative community inspiration from one another. “We other’s company, a sense of
developing at the Ceramic Center. have become used to working learned, and togetherness and harmony
“I have made some lifelong friends, in our own studios, to make and emerged in the space. Each
so overall it has been a fantastic promote our own work. We have created, by participant supported and
experience. We have markings forgotten that art is meant to be collaborated with the others to
and angles. Hidden and seen, yet learned and created by receiving
receiving from and enhance their knowledge and
to be explored. To me exploring from and giving to one another, giving to one explore new avenues, lending a
a new material and pushing its not in isolation. It used to be that fresh set of eyes and a helping
limits is just like exploring a new way, but we don’t teach young another, not in hand when needed. They
friendship.” artists that, and we don’t practice it expressed the need for artists
ourselves.” isolation. to share their learnings and
Indrani used this opportunity to experiences in community art
experiment with the distinctive spaces so young creatives have
features of her environment and access to more knowledge and
the synergy emerging within opportunities. Many generously
the group. She brought her own shared their new discoveries and
materials, like volcanic sand recipes with the Ceramic Center,
from a beach near her studio in facilitating upcoming generations
Pondicherry, and mixed them with of ceramic artists, and nurturing
clays, glazes, and wood fire ash an environment of respect and
from the Ceramic Center, creating care where they can produce
pieces with unique textures and meaningful work that pushes
effects. Her series of Memory boundaries.
Vessels are made of various
mixtures of clay collected from her Photographs from the CERAMIC
fellow artists’ workstations. CENTER, BARODA

66 H eart f u l n es s 67
creat iv it y
Creativity is the way
I share my soul
with the world.

BRENÉ BROWN

Artwork by KATHLEEN SCARBORO

 C RE ATI VI TY

Thoughts About

Painting
India
KATHLEEN SCARBORO shares her journey as an artist, explaining why she has chosen the
subjects that are so dear to her heart. In December 2023, she opened an exhibition entitled
“Indian Women: Grace and Resilience” in the Town Hall of the 16th Arrondisement of Paris,
France, to celebrate that journey, and we showcase some of those paintings here.

W
hen I met Chariji in
1988, I had no idea
that India would be
important in my life, or that for
thirty years I would devote myself
exclusively to painting this subject.
For meditators, life unfolds and
reveals its main themes over
time. As I look back over my
trajectory, it seems that there was
an inner logic that had its own
momentum and all I had to do
was follow along and do the work.
I remember my painting teacher,
Patrick Betaudier, used to say that
when a painting is ripe to come
into existence, it paints itself. I
often feel that way.
Before starting meditation, I was
already a professional painter. I
had a good technique and I had
the desire to produce art, but
my true message, what exactly I
wanted to paint, was not clear to
me. So much art had been created,
in so many directions, by so many
artists, and I wasn’t sure of my
place in the general scheme of
things. One day, as I was working
on murals on Réunion Island, it
suddenly seemed obvious what
I wanted to paint, why, and for

70 H eart f u l n es s Feb r uar y 2 024 71

CR EAT I V I T Y C RE ATI VI TY

whom. I am certain this realization was

the result of the meditation I had begun
practicing. Meditation gives us the clarity
to know ourselves, which leads to an
understanding of how to use our abilities to
share with others.

What inspires me are the lives of people

of modest condition, in tune with nature,
and the beauty and harmony of the natural
world. I generally paint women and
children; their universe is more accessible
to me, and I share the love of drapery,
textiles, and vivid color with the women
of India. The beauty that inspires me is
not that of movie stars or the perfection
of youth. I seek a quieter beauty that is
unaware of itself and not dependent on
passing modes.

Nature is an important element in my

work. I love gardening and the delicate
designs and the fleeting elegance of flowers.
I enjoy interweaving natural elements
and landscapes with portraits of people in
various postures and activities.

Indian women are often mothers and

combine a practical sense of daily reality,
work, caring for others, and a graceful,

I generally paint women

and children; their
universe is more
accessible to me, and I
share the love of drapery,
textiles, and vivid color
with the women of India.

72
 natural elegance. They are the pillars of our world. I try
to evoke this in my paintings, and this is why my latest
exhibition in Paris has the title, “Indian Women: Grace
and Resilience.”

My approach to painting was greatly influenced by

classical art. I make my medium and emulsion myself, and
my technique is a modernized version of the techniques
of the Flemish and Italian Renaissance. Paintings take
months to do using this method, and intense color is
created by layers and layers of transparent oil glazes.

I became a professional artist in 1981. Throughout a

career in public art, I always dealt with a commission
system. In other words, customers would request a work
of art and I would find a way to express their ideas and
ideals. This kept me very close to a general audience who
generally knew nothing about the art found in galleries
or museums. Thanks to this link with an audience,

74 H eart f u l n es s Feb r uar y 2 024 75

CREAT I V I T Y
working with cities, schools, and
other public entities, I came to
understand that the basic role of
a work of art is communication.
To be successful, the work has to
please the client and myself on the
conceptual and aesthetic levels.
This was the hardest part of public
art.
Strangely, public art prepared me
as an easel painter; I sensed that
my mural and sculpture experience
taught me to concentrate on
grand themes and pulled me to a
situation where I was no longer
interested in my own personal
trajectory, but with our shared
story. This is the opposite of what
we learned to do in art school
where we were encouraged to
76 H eart f u l n es s Feb r uar y 2 024
C RE ATI VI TY
explore our own personal psyche
and idiosyncrasies.
Thanks to this public art
orientation, my eyes were directed
toward the outside, toward other
people and their ways of life,
rather than looking inside. I was
first given many opportunities
to explore a culture different
from mine in Réunion, where I
visited villages, spoke with people,
photographed their animals and
their environment. For ten years, I
worked on this theme.
Then I turned my eyes toward
India. Going from Réunion to
India, the light, the iconography,
the style of dress, the architecture
were all different; the range of
colors too. As a result, my painting
style changed completely. India has
provided a marvelous opportunity
to explore intense, highly saturated
color as well as the power,
compositional opportunities, and
opulence of drapery (thanks to the
women in their saris). The Indian
pantheon of gods and goddesses,
the intemporal landscapes and
temples, and the Indian people
provide an unending inspiration
for my paintings.
Artwork by KATHLEEN SCARBORO
77
 CH I LDRE N

O
nce there lived a joyful if he was hungry. Now the young man thought he would meet his

The Power of Love

man called Julio and man was perplexed. end. Everyone knew the man
he helped anyone he He brought out his knife and he robbed and he would tattle.
could. He dropped people to his angry look again, and said, He was surprised when Julio
places without charging them, “Are you trying to pull a swifty? walked to a table, pulled a chair
he anonymously paid off people’s Because if you are…” for him and invited him to sit.
debts, and regularly bought food Julio smiled and said, “No, don’t Julio recommended his favorite
SARA BUBBER shares a story from AUDREY LIN of ServiceSpace, and then for homeless people. He played worry, I’m going to a restaurant. hot soup and asked the waiter to
offers us some reflective questions and an experiment to do for a month. games with young children and Come join me.” bring a couple of hot dishes for his
regaled them with stories. young friend. Stunned, the young
The man followed Julio to the man ate but really didn’t know
One night he was taking the restaurant and watched everyone what was happening.
Metro to his favorite restaurant, greet him joyfully. “Hello Julio!
and he and a young man were How are you today?” “Julio, I After a hearty meal, Julio asked
the last ones in the cabin. He thought I would catch up with him how his evening was.
reached his station and both got you, glad we met here!” The young
off the train. Julio began to walk
to the restaurant, eager to meet his
friends. Suddenly the young man
sprang in front of him, pointing
a knife at his stomach, and said
aggressively, “Stay quiet and hand
me your wallet.” Julio was a little
confused, but he took out his
wallet and handed it to the young
man. The young man maintained
his menacing look and pointed at
his beautiful gold watch, saying
“That too! Be quick.” Julio took
off his watch and gave it to the
young man.
Julio smiled, took off his jacket
and gave it to him, saying,
“Probably you are cold. Here,
please take this also.”
The young man was surprised, but
any gifts were welcome.

The young man was about to

disappear into the darkness of the
lonely street when Julio stopped
him. He put his hand on the
young man’s shoulder and asked

78 H eart f u l n es s Feb r uar y 2 024 79

CHIL D R EN CH I LDRE N

The young man had no words. He

managed to splutter “excellent…
An experiment of love
warm food.”
Julio then said, “Now, I would be
happy to pay the cheque, but my Think of five people you love the most and write their names down.
wallet is with you.”
Tears streamed down the young
man’s face and he hugged Julio.
Out came the wallet, the gold
watch, and the coat, along with a
sheepish sorry. Julio gave the coat
back to him and said, “I think you
need this more than I do.”

The young man walked away into
the darkness, whistling a lullaby
his mother had sung to him, and
smiled, finally feeling warm in his
heart.
Now that you have identified the people you love the most, try to extend that feeling to a wider circle. It may
be difficult to be like Julio and feel love and compassion for everyone, so this experiment from the Heartfulness
practices will help.
At 9 p.m. every day, for 5 to 10 minutes, pause your activities and think that everyone is being filled with love
and devotion and that real faith is growing stronger in them.

Try it for a month and see what happens. Let the magic of these words unfold over time!

REFLECTION QUESTIONS RESULTS OF THE EXPERIMENT

Do you think Julio inspired the young man to change his ways of harassing How do you feel?
and stealing?
Day 1

Day 7

Day 14
Had Julio been angry or frightened, what would have been the outcome?
Day 21

Day 28

Illustrations by LAKSHMI GADDAM

80 H eart f u l n es s Feb r uar y 2 024 81

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