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H A E D I

N T

K I

S O

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SOUTHALL
HOW ABOUT SIDE BY SIDE WITH A TURKEY?

Welcome to the Family..


We are, We are, We are the Southall boys. The Southall newsletter is our gift back to the world, sharing our insights, and giving everyone a glimpse into the turbulent, but rewarding lives that we lead. We hope you enjoy the read, and look forward to your comments and questions, @51Southall on twitter!

The Thanksgiving edition! This is a time of year where it is important to remember those less fortunate then ourselves. Which is why weve written you this. The Southall - Because youve got nothing better to do on a Thursday. Please enjoy this weeks, news, gossip, laughs and tears from the boys at Southall.

Happy Thanksgiving!

In this segment, we interview one of the lucky visitors to the household, probing into their stay, and nding out what made them tick during their time in our home!

Whos Been Spotted at Southall?

Name: Lewis Freeth aka L-Dog Days spent? 2 Funniest moment of your stay? The Steve Merchant teen issues *Choices* sketch and it's re-telling from the boys. Stephen Merchant being funnier than you know who Gossip from your night out? Witnessing the meaning of an open relationship and us believing that we could write the next Ofce or Peep Show. Where did you sleep? JBs oor to avoid his snoring in Dolby 5.1. Loudest housemate? Bushby, when Saints score. Song of the stay? Guns N Roses - Sweet Child Of Mine How many house cleans have you participated in? 0

What were listening to this week:


JB: Toto - Africa Gilo: Duran Duran - Hungry Like the Wolf Luc: Ed Sheeran feat. Mikill Pane - Little Lady Stew: Ronan Parke - Jar of Hearts Daw: Vato Gonzalez - Badman Riddim (Jump) Bushby: A Day To Remember - Homesick (Acoustic) Brad: Ronan Parke - A Thousand Miles

Teammates
This week, we put long term defensive back Mikey George on the spot hitting him with some quick-re questions about his Tsunami team mates, hoping to get inside the brain of the Chaldean Casanova. Heres what we found out... Best @ Training? Rich Cooling Worst @ Training? Dave Ndede Mr. Consistent? Bradley McManus The Joker? Giles Kennedy Most Intelligent? George Burdon Least Intelligent? Tumnus Worst Dress Sense? Alex Surplice Best Looking? Jake Beale Best Singing Voice? Ryan Bushby ...... and Whos Longest in the shower? Patricio Mikey George: DB #23 Another animal fact this week, this time regarding the humble honey bee. Which, by the by, can travel for almost 2 MILLION miles at 7mph on the amount of energy obtained from just one liter of nectar. Consider yourself wowed. We were.

Fact of the Week:

Again the rumours have been coming in thick and fast this week. Top of the list is the fact that Jake Beale has been settling down with his older woman. It is widely known that a couple of weeks ago he was seen courting with his mistress, this lady of the night in Wahoo, after plenty of banter he revealed early on Thursday that she is in fact his new piece, and a spring wedding is in the pipeline! Tip of The Week: If you are ever planning on having 10 apple sour shots in a row with 2 friends, dont. Buy something else. Sour shots are sour. You wont enjoy yourself. Youll feel sour. And ill. Buy something else.

The Luc Higham Rumour Mill

JBs Gripe of the Week


Every week Im gripin...and in this edition Ive taken issue with indie types, also commonly referred to as scenesters. You know the sort - jeans so tight that they could put a mans reproductive capacity in jeopardy, boat shoes that have seldom seen a puddle, let alone a vessel suitable for water. I could go on. What really annoys me is that none of it makes sense, none of it has a purpose. Why are the drawstrings on your hoodies tied?! Why arent you wearing any fucking socks?! Socks are practical and comfortable. Socks work. If I suddenly decided not to wear underwear, would alternative women want to sleep with me? No they wouldnt, theyd think I was an unhygienic tosser. Well thats what you are. Youre not indie (independent), youre morons.

Made in Southall
- Obituaries
We announce with great sadness the passing of a dear friend, who for the last 10 weeks has left our jaws dropped without fail at the excitement and drama it has brought into our life. At 11.00 pm on Monday evening, Made In Chelsea departed from our screens but the memories of Proudlocks inspirational earing, Ollies sensational hair, and Gabriella, with her face like a scabbed knee will live on, in our hearts, and in our smiles, long into the night.

Movember Madness
We are now into week three of Movember and the taches are really starting to come along nicely, some of us are becoming quite fond of them while others are getting frustrated with the itchiness that comes with! A plus side however would have to be the food some of us nd in them a little while after eating, a real after dinner treat! If any of you are also taking part in Movember we would love to see how yours are getting on so tweet them to us @51Southall!

Wildlife!
WolfDog. A poem. WolfDog lives across the road. Hes friendly and polite. He comes out to say hello to us When we return at night. I bet he could be vicious, But he wouldnt be with us. Cause WolfDog loves the Southall And weve all earned WolfDogs trust. So if you come to Southall Be sure to say hello Cause if you dont love Mr WolfDog Then we just dont want to know.

Oh, na, na, Whats my name?


Whats in a name? Things could have been a lot different here at Southall. We reveal the also-rans: potential names our parents had lined up for us, including if wed been girls. Giles: Fiona/Humphrey Bush: Thomas Brad: Declan JB: Rose Stew: Molly Luc: Phillip Johnny: Humphrey/ Ambrose

Overheard At Southall - Guess Who?


Id just tell her, listen love, Im gonna have to use fingers and tongue, otherwise that is gonna go off Cruuuuude! Man,what you just showed me was pretty much a bushtucker trial. I didnt need to see that

As ever, feel free to tweet us @51Southall if you think you can put a name to these outbursts!

I literally wouldnt even have sex with her. I mean obviously I would, but..

Weve got a corker for you this week; Gilos chilli-cheese burger bombs! These oozing treats are great for breakfast lunch or dinner! Ingredients: 454g lean minced beef Red onion 2 small red chilli peppers (with seeds to taste) One large egg Bread crumbs 150g stilton 1tbsp wholegrain mustard Salt and pepper to season Preparation: Make 8 half depth patties, ensuring that the mixture is adequately compact, to avoid the Finely dice red onion and chilli peppers burgers breaking up on cooking. Add all other ingredients to a Slice crumble cheese generously mixing bowl and combine on top of half the patties, and thoroughly, making sure that the then place the remaining 4 on egg/breadcrumbs are evenly top. Be sure that the edges of the spread throughout the mixture. burgers are now sealed.

Dish of the Week

Fry the burgers for 10-14 minutes in a griddle pan over a low heat, draining off fat occasionally. Serve with sweet potato chips, and a salad. Enjoy!

Last night for the Social was toga theme, a chance for all the guys to wrap a bed sheet around themselves, and the girls to show off their tailoring skills, with exquisitely crafted outts. All in all it was a very successful night, and even though the numbers were not as much as previous weeks it was still a success. The Roman would have been proud! On another note next week is Pink Night to raise awareness for the Hester Stewart Memorial Foundation in memory a former Waves cheerleader. This is one of the most important nights on the social calendar so lets make sure we see you all there next week, looking pretty in pink!

Social Shenanigans

NIPPLE!

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