Lauren`s Intro

What`s the meaning oI Love? The dictionary

describes it as; a proIoundly tender, passionate aIIection Ior
another. Shakespeare said, 'Love comIorteth like sunshine
aIter rain. And my Iavourite author Dr Seuss says 'when you
are in love you can`t Iall asleep because reality is better then
your dreams Now speaking oI dreams I`d like to bring the
person who has been dreaming oI this day Ior along time...our
bride...Lauren.
S:
So I work with a married couple...I happened to be
passing by his desk yesterday and said 'what`s up?...and He
says 'i`m just waiting Ior my vacation!...His wiIe happens to
hear us and shouts 'So I`m I...cause when he goes way I get a
vacation Irom him!
Hey Guys, remember this line, it could come in
handy.... "How do you expect me to remember your birthday
when you never look any older?"
ne weekend Iour married guys went golIing. During the 4th
hole, the Iollowing conversation took place. First Guy:
"You have no idea what I had to do to be able to come out
golIing this weekend. I had to promise my wiIe that I will
paint every room in the house next weekend."
Second Guy: "That's nothing, I had to promise my wiIe that I
will build her a new deck Ior the pool."
Third Guy: "Man, you both have it easy! I had to promise my
wiIe that I will remodel the kitchen Ior her."
They continue to play the hole when they realized that the
Iourth guy has not said a word. So they asked him. "You
haven't said anything about what you had to do to be able to
come golIing this weekend. What's the deal?"
Fourth Guy: "I just set my alarm Ior 5:30 am. When it went
oII, I shut oII my alarm, gave the wiIe a nudge and said, 'GolI
course or intercourse?' She said, 'Don't Iorget your sweater.'"
ne day a man posted an ad on Craig`s List; all it
read was: "WiIe wanted".
Next day he received hundreds oI emails. They all said the
same thing: "You can have mine."
A wiIe, one evening, drew her husband's attention to
the couple next door and said, "Do you see that couple? How
devoted they are? He kisses her every time they meet. Why
don't you do that?"

"I would love to," replied the husband, "but I don't know her
well enough."
A husband and wiIe are in bed watching "Who Wants to be a
Millionaire."
The husband asks Ior sex.
The wiIe says, "No."
Her husband asks, "Is that your Iinal answer?"
She responds, "Yes."
He says, Then, I'd like to phone a Iriend."
The Iive essential words Ior a good marriage: 'I`m
sorry' and 'Yes, you`re right.'
At a party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you
wearing your wedding ring on the wrong Iinger?" The other
replied, "Yes, I am, I married the wrong man."
Love is like wetting yourselI...veryone can see it but
only you can Ieel its warmth.
Marriage teaches you may things loyalty, patience,
understanding, perseverance and a lot oI other things you
wouldn`t need iI you`d stayed single.
To love someone deeply gives you strength but to be
loved by someone deeply gives you courage.

The Story oI Derek & Lauren
It was a Friday night and evin & I were on our way
to the pub to grab a bit to eat...when I should call up Lauren;
see iI she wants to hangout. Now Lauren being the 'Party
Animal that she is turned me down said she had plans
already. Yep it was 6:30 on a Friday night and she was
dressed in her P`s and heading to bed. I don`t think we were
at the pub more than 10mins when my phone rang...it was
Lauren. 'I`ll be ready when you get here she says. So I paick
her up...and well the 3 oI us are there having a great time and
decide to go pool some pool. This also was around the time
that we decided to call Derek to Iind out how his 'Blind Date
was going...he said he`d meet us at the pool hall... I wouldn`t
get into the details about his date but let`s just say it didn`t go
well.