sunshine, baby!

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/54614452.

Rating: Explicit
Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply
Category: M/M
Fandom: One Direction (Band)
Relationship: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson
Characters: Harry Styles, Louis Tomlinson, Niall Horan, Liam Payne, Oli Wright,
Zayn Malik, Jay Tomlinson, Anne Cox, Robin Twist, Gemma Styles
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - College/University, Strangers to Lovers, Lust at
First Sight, Friends With Benefits, Louis is in Law School, Harry is a
swimmer, College Sports, Olympic Trials, Pining, Closeted Character,
Coming Out, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Smut, Pick someone supportive
Language: English
Collections: 1D Song Fest Round 2
Stats: Published: 2024-03-21 Words: 106,528 Chapters: 8/8
 sunshine, baby!
by staybeautiful

Summary

Louis was the first one down the row for their group. If he hadn’t been they would have never
met.

He was turned around, walking backwards and saying to Liam, “No, I’ll get you to a real
footie match next,” when he bumped into someone.

“Oops,” Louis laughed, tripping over his own feet. A hand curled around his upper arm as
he nearly fell over the seat in front of him. “Sorry about that, mate.”

He turned around, still teetering in his vans, to apologize again, but the words dried in his
throat. Another hand gripped his other elbow, steadying him, but all Louis could see were
green eyes and dimples.

“Hi,” the man laughed, a bright, bubbling sound. “Are you okay?”

Or Louis is in his first year of law school, Harry is a junior on the swim team dreaming of the
Olympics, and they both agree that they don't have time for anything more than friends with
benefits... right?

Notes

Hello friends!! I'm sooo excited for my swimmer au to be finished and in your hands! I
started working on this in the middle of December, right after I finished i would know you

💛
from touch alone, and just wrote like a mad woman for the last couple of months. This story
was such a breath of fresh air for me, I hope it is for you too

The title is an amalgamation of the song "Sunshine Baby" by The Japanese House and
"Wasteland, Baby!" by Hozier. Just because, just for fun.

This is my contribution to Song Fest! The song this is based off of is "I'm Not Your Girl" by
Bonner Black, but the whole playlist for this fic really informed it in a lot of ways. Big
heaping thanks to Emily modding the fest.

Also massive thank you to Panda for beta reading, I know you pulled yourself through this
one, with a load of burning and pressing issues but we got there in the end. I wanted to also
send some love and thanks to anyone on tumblr, twitter or discord who wrote with me, read
snippets, was just generally excited for this fic. It means so much to me!

Disclaimer of sorts that I have never been a competitive swimmer nor have I gone to law
school. I did a decent amount of research on both things, but there are bound to be things I
got grievously wrong. There are also a couple things I just purposefully let slide for ~artistic
reasons.

Please do not repost to any other site and I am not currently accepting translations requests.

As always, thank you so much for reading. I hope you enjoy their journey!
FIC POST | TWITTER POST
💛 SPOTIFY |
 August

“Where the fuck are my Torts notes?” Louis asked himself aloud, leafing through a massive
pile of notebooks, leaflets, and textbooks. He lived in organized chaos, which worked most of
the time, but not this time.

There was a loud knock on the door of his study cubicle just as he yanked the stapled packet
out from between his Constitutional Law textbook and his Intro to Lawyering notebook. He
spun the doorknob with his elbow and then bumped it with his hip to open the door.

On the other side was his new friend, Liam. His short brown hair was pushed back on his
head with a pair of sunglasses and he had an orange Florida Gators t-shirt on with a pair of
cargo shorts. Sweat beaded on his forehead like he’d just come inside out of the Florida heat.

“Hey, mate,” Louis said, dropping the papers next to his laptop on the cramped desk.

Liam leaned against the rickety doorway with a bemused sort of smile, probably towards the
mess inside. The whole wall of study cubicles tilted slightly with his weight. There were
eight in a row in this room, unsecured to the floor or wall, and another group in a different
part of the Law Library. Coveted little study cells.

“I’m still jealous you have one of these,” Liam said, nodding towards the cramped room that
looked more like a confession booth than a study space.

“It came with my scholarship,” Louis said, shrugging. He’d thought it was a bit of a joke
when admissions had tossed it in with his offer and he’d had a laugh about it with his mates.
But once he’d gotten to Gainesville, he was fighting off glares from not only his fellow first
years, but 2 & 3 L’s as well. “What’s up?”

“You’re coming to the game right?” It was the home opener for the football team and
everyone else’s excitement for it had him more than a little intrigued.

“Yeah, Lindsay gave me her extra ticket.” It was more like she had stood in the center of the
room after their Con Law class ended and begged someone to take it off her. Everyone else
was already going or busy so she’d thrust it at him with an emphatic here.

“Are you ready to go?” Liam hooked a thumb over his shoulder towards the doors.

Checking the time on his phone, he raised an eyebrow at Liam. “The game isn’t for another
couple of hours, right?”

A slow smile curved on Liam’s face. “Right. But tailgating, Louis, starts now. It’s the best
part.”

Louis cocked his head to the side, but then shrugged and pocketed his phone. While he exited
his study cubicle and locked it behind him, Liam told him a story about getting hammered at
the big state school he’d done undergrad at back in Texas. It was long and meandering and
continued as they moved to exit the building. When they got to the door Liam stopped him
with his arm out.

“Is that what you’re wearing?”

Louis looked down at his outfit - a plain green vest top and shorts. Hesitantly, he said, “Yes?”

Liam shook his head and with more seriousness than it required, replied, “no.”

It was the very last day of August and the Florida heat was brutal. Louis had been drinking
since three and it was inching towards seven, but the sun was still high and hot in the sky.
The stretch of lawn he’d been parked in was littered with beer cans and discarded Jello shot
cups. Down the front of his borrowed orange t-shirt was a red stain down from where one had
dribbled out of his mouth. In the air was the smell of smoke and barbecue and his stomach
had been rumbling for the better part of an hour.

It was the end of only his second week of law school and he was starting to realize that the
University of Florida was not what he had expected. For undergrad he’d been at a small
liberal arts college smack in the middle of Boston, so things like school spirit, the athletics,
the parties weren’t things that had even been on his radar. But there he was, barely three
weeks into living in Florida, trying new things. Louis had never been to an American
Football game before, never even considered it, but he was now in the midst of a massive
tailgate waiting to go see one. They were playing Miami and he wasn’t sure if that was a big
deal or if everyone would be this hyped up for the game no matter who they’d played.

He’d not intended to go to the game, to ever go to a game, but when Lindsay pushed the
ticket on him, he’d thought why the hell not. There was a first time for everything.

So, there he was, following a tidal wave of orange and blue into the stadium. He was a little
drunk and Liam had his arm slung over his shoulder as they made their way to the entrance.
It was a slow line to get their tickets and their student IDs scanned and by the time they were
climbing to the student section the game was close to starting.

Louis was the first one down the row for their group. If he hadn’t been they would have never
met.

He was turned around, walking backwards and saying to Liam, “No, I’ll get you to a real
footie match next,” when he bumped into someone.

“Oops,” Louis laughed, tripping over his own feet. A hand curled around his upper arm as he
nearly fell over the seat in front of him. “Sorry about that, mate.”

He turned around, still teetering in his vans, to apologize again, but the words dried in his
throat. Another hand gripped his other elbow, steadying him, but all Louis could see were
green eyes and dimples.

“Hi,” the man laughed, a bright, bubbling sound. “Are you okay?”

Louis was nodding, he was pretty sure he was nodding at least. In front of him was a tall,
broad man, with gorgeous chocolate curls and a stupidly cute grin on his face.

“Yeah, sorry again. Didn’t mean to run into you.” Louis was smiling at him with the sun in
his eyes, so bright he knew he was squinting with it.

“’S okay, no worries.” His hands fell from Louis’ body and Louis had half a thought to tug
them back. “No harm, no foul.”

“Is that how that works?”

Harry cocked his head to the side and looked at Louis with an odd sort of smile, his lips
pushed together as if trying to contain it and his nose scrunching up. Louis matched the look
back to him and then his tongue poked just out the side of his lips.

“Hey, Lou,” Liam said, tugging on his elbow. Louis turned away to look at him. “I’m getting
a beer, you want one?”

“Yeah, thanks. That would be great.” Louis nodded his head. The alcohol in his system was
starting to feel like it was burning off in the heat and the long, slow walk into the stadium.

Louis watched Liam squeeze past the rest of their group in the row and then he turned back to
face the field. From the corner of his eye he could see the guy next to him’s back was facing
him now as he chatted with the people on the other side of him, but there was a tickling in
Louis’ head that urged him to get his attention back.

He pinched his own wrist and turned to the girl in the seat next to Liam’s. It was Lindsay,
who had given him the extra ticket. He didn’t know her well, outside of her academic history
(cum laude at USF in poli sci with a government minor), which was how she’d introduced
herself to him at orientation, and that her boyfriend cheated on her with her cousin. Hence his
free ticket.

“Thanks again for the invite,” Louis said, wincing internally at his own words. Small talk
always felt awkward and even worse, was having to thank someone for something. He had an
absolute horrendous time expressing gratitude, always so sure he sounded like such a wanker.
“It’s my first American football game… like ever.”

She waved her hand, strawberry blonde hair flipping with the motion. “No biggie. I hope
when they show the student section Chad thinks Liam is my new boyfriend or something. Do
you think?”

“I’m sure that is something that could definitely, possibly happen.”

She smiled brilliantly at him.

“It’s your first game?” Came from behind him. Louis was smiling, his lips twisting in
pleasure, before he even turned back towards the stranger next to him. The guy was already
facing him, that smile back on his face, a hand pushing his hair back on his head and then
shaking out his fringe.

“Yeah, we didn’t have it back home, obviously, and my undergrad wasn’t much for… sport.”
Louis waved his hand in front of himself as if to indicate all this. He was grinning at Louis in
the bright sunlight, eyes squinted nearly closed and the dimples in his cheeks deep set and
pretty. It was making it hard to think, but he was at least able to squeak out, “I’m Louis.”

“Harry,” he said with a hand on his chest, right over the gator symbol. “Are you here on
exchange?”

Louis shook his head. “First year law student, actually.”

Harry’s eyes widened. “Sounds like hell.”

“That’s what they keep telling us.” Sweat trickled from the back of his neck down his spine.
“What year are you?”

“Oh, I’m a junior. Business major.” He shrugged and then ran a hand through his hair. Louis
couldn’t help but track the movement, his bicep flexing under his shirt and the slight pull of it
across his chest. “Mostly I’m here to swim.”

Images flashed in his mind before he could help himself and he tried to blink them away
rapidly, before saying, “Is college swimming like all this?”

He gestured towards the stadium. A vision of a space just as big with a pool in the middle,
cheerleaders, a band, and rabid fans flanking the space filled his head.

Harry snorted out, “No,” but the smile didn’t drop from his face. “Not as thrilling to watch
somebody swim for like ten minutes without stopping.”

“I guess we’ll have to see,” Louis started, running his bottom lip through his teeth. “Which is
more thrilling.”

He felt a little insane from the heat or maybe the alcohol, trying to flirt his arse off in this
stadium, in Florida, but he couldn’t stop himself. Harry was possibly the most gorgeous
person he’d ever seen and he wasn’t going to let the opportunity pass him by. Besides, he
seemed intrigued at the very least.

On the field, the band started to play a song he didn’t know and the cheerleaders were on the
sidelines hyping up the crowd.

“The game’s about to start,” Harry said.

Louis looked from the field back to him. “You’ll have to tell me how it works.”

Harry leaned closer to him, just enough that their shoulders brushed, and nodded with his
mouth in a closed lipped smile.
The teams ran out to the field and the stadium erupted in cheers, so loud that Louis could
barely take it in, looking around with wide eyes to the sea of orange and blue, like a viscous
wave in the stands. Next to him, Harry had a hand cupped around his mouth and was yelling
loudly. Louis could see the piece of gum pressed between his cheek and tongue.

“Shit,” he heard on his left and turned to see Liam squeezing down the row with two beers
sloshing precariously close to the rim of the plastic cups in his hands. Liam held his out and
Louis took one of them, taking a sip immediately.

“Cheers.”

Liam nodded. “Glad I didn’t miss kick off. It was crazy down there.”

The teams took the field and he watched semi-interested as the game started. Louis was
trying to follow it, but he was distracted by Harry shouting what was happening in his ear, his
hands flying around with his words and his eyes flashing from Louis’ to the field. Liam
tossed him several bemused looks, but didn’t say anything.

There was a pause in the game play and Louis looked to Harry for explanation.

“They break for TV.”

“Really?” He asked, his tone a bit incredulous.

Harry nodded, his lip between his teeth. “Gonna happen a lot, probably.”

“Seems annoying.” But he wasn’t bothered and he was sure that was clear in his voice. The
game was a sideshow to getting to know Harry.

Harry shrugged, the grin on his face showing he wasn’t concerned either. His friends next to
them were all but forgotten with the way he was almost fully turned towards Louis now.

The players took the field again and Louis pulled his phone up, taking a picture and sending
it in the group chat to his friends and roommates from undergrad, Niall and Oli. Niall was
working a finance job in Boston and Oli had gone to Chicago for med school. They kept up
with each other in a very active group chat and FaceTime calls twice a week. It worked now,
but was going to be miserable once school picked up for him and Oli.

Niall & Oli

Louis: guess who likes sports now?

Harry: hint: it’s not me

He pocketed his phone and from the corner of his eye tracked Harry’s gaze following the
motion of Louis’ hand to his back pocket. He tucked a smirk into the rim of his cup and took
a long sip.

The rest of the first quarter and most of the second continued the same and his empty cup
found its way down next to his feet. He and Harry spent it curved towards each other as he
explained the game, pointed out players he knew, and made a slew of horribly timed jokes.

At the half, the Gators were winning 7-0. The cheerleaders took the field with the band, just
as the sun was slipping below the horizon. The whole stadium was bathed in a drippy orange
haze. The loud cheers and music from the band were an interesting contrast to the sky, both
loud and soft at the same time. He followed along, poorly albeit, to the coordinated moves
everyone else seemed to inherently know, including a stadium wide gator chomp.

The cheering died down and he was about to ask Harry if he wanted to grab a beer, when
Harry spoke instead.

“So, where are you from?” He ran a hand through his hair, the brown curls sweaty from the
heat, but he was still grinning brightly at Louis.

“England,” Louis answered, teasingly. “How about you?”

“I’m from here.”

“Right here?” Louis squared his body towards him, his voice dipping to a mocking tone, but
his mouth curving into a smile. “Right here on the pitch?”

Harry mouthed the word ‘pitch’ and then shook his head around his laughter. Louis bit the
inside of his cheek to hold his own in. Around his laughter, Harry said, “Yeah, my mom came
onto the field to give birth.”

“It’s giving The Waterboy.”

Harry let out an aborted giggle, scrunching his nose and then poking his tongue out slightly.

“You know, part of that was filmed near where I grew up?”

Louis cocked his head, his cheeks starting to ache from how much he was smiling. “That’s
not really a ringing endorsement for you, mate.”

Harry tossed his head back as he laughed, the line of his neck long out of his orange t-shirt
right up to his jutted chin with just the sparsest of hair stubbornly trying to grow out. Louis
had half a mind to rub along his jaw with his thumb to feel the stubble against his skin.

“Well, hey, it’s just my hometown, not me.” He leaned back against his seat, so his legs and
arse were against it, but stayed standing. Stayed looking at Louis. “Besides, we moved down
the coast when I was in middle school.”

“I haven’t been to a beach here yet, are they nice?”

Harry nodded, the heat plastering his curls to his head. “Yeah, you get a bit of everything
with the Atlantic or gulf coast to choose from. We’ll have to go sometime.”

Louis teased at the corner of his mouth with his tongue, grinning at Harry. His mind already
was racing ahead - to after the game, to the beach, to forever. It felt insane they’d only met
that evening, that they’d not been standing here basking in each other for days or weeks
already.

The teams took the field for the second half. Louis couldn’t tell you what happened, who was
winning, he wouldn’t even have been able to tell you when it ended if the people in his row
didn’t start shuffling towards the aisle. Louis looked to Liam’s back, already retreating down
the row, in mild panic.

He turned to face Harry, walking slowly down the row backwards in a mirror image of how
they met. He wasn’t ready to lose him yet, to say goodbye. “So, what’s next?”

Harry smirked, but his eyes were watching Louis’ feet like he was afraid he’d topple down
the stadium. “Think my friends were heading to the ATO house for a party, if you wanted to
come?”

He’d never been to a frat house before, let alone a frat party. But he wasn’t ready to let Harry
go yet. “Sure. Is it all keg stands and GHB?”

Harry grabbed him by the elbow and his breath caught in his throat. “Careful.”

The crowd of people were streaming right behind him, the heel on his left foot sticking into
the aisle and a rush of bodies skimming right against his shoulder. He hadn’t even noticed.
Smiling at Harry, he turned carefully so his hand skimmed Louis’ entire midsection as he
moved.

He looked back to Harry over his shoulder and asked, “So?”

“Not that I’ve seen,” Harry said. Louis stepped into a break in the crowd onto the stairs and
Harry followed close behind him. “Disappointed?”

The person in front of him stopped short and Louis jolted to a halt on the second to last step.
Harry was already halfway down it and pushed into Louis’ back with his chest. If not for
Harry’s hand gripping his hip, he would have flown forward. The touch was hot through his
thin t-shirt, Harry’s fingers curving just above the waistband of his shorts.

He was slow to pull back his hand with a low, “Sorry,” coming from behind him. Louis
leaned back just slightly, his body unconsciously chasing the touch.

He glanced over his shoulder with his lips pursed around a smile. “No worries.”

Harry’s eyes flitted from his eyes to the purse of his smile and Louis couldn’t help the smile
getting wider, his teeth digging into his lip as he held it back.

The line moved again and they made their way slowly out of the stadium. Harry trailed
behind him, his hand catching Louis’ elbow or shoulder every other minute to pull him in a
certain direction or just to make sure they didn’t get separated in the crowd. A thrill ran
through him at every touch. He’d felt an immediate connection to Harry and he’d been
unwilling to turn away from him for the whole game, but it was something else to feel that
reciprocated. To know that Harry didn’t want to lose him either.
They exited the stadium side by side and when Louis looked around he didn’t see his friends
from the law school or any of the people Harry was with.

They paused on the brick sidewalk facing each other. Harry was running a hand through his
curls, his hair was still messy and damp. Louis knew the neck of his shirt had to be stained
with sweat and Harry’s looked the same. He didn’t mind looking less than perfect if Harry
kept staring at him that way.

“I could drive?” Harry offered. “My car is across the street. I’m not planning on drinking
anymore tonight.”

A calm, lazy smile was on his face. Like it was the place it naturally rested. The crowd was
streaming around them still and Louis kept looking for the people they had come with, but it
steadfastly remained the two of them. It was almost a relief.

“If I’m being honest, I would kill for something to eat.” Louis pressed a hand to his stomach,
which growled as if on command. He’d been hungry before the game even started and he’d
been so enraptured by Harry during it he hadn’t dared leave his seat. “If we could do that first
maybe?”

“Yeah, I know a place.” Harry nodded his head towards where he said he’d parked and they
walked slowly together. Farther down the road and around a curve was the law school, which
was pretty much the only place on campus he’d properly been to. He wasn’t familiar with
anything between there and where they were now. Across the street he could see a couple
buildings and a fenced in outdoor area attached. They made their way over there once a jeep
blasting a rap song he’d never heard passed and the road was clear.

In front of them was a large brick building lit up by a row of streetlights. On the front of the
building, under the donor name, was a large Florida Gator logo.

“Seems like the headquarters for a cult or something.”

“Close,” Harry said with a low laugh. “It’s the football training center. The athlete dining hall
is inside.”

Harry walked to the glass door and on a small touch pad next to it he scanned his thumb.
There was the soft sound of the door unlocking and then he ushered Louis inside.

“Should be dead at this hour, but if anyone asks you’re on, like, the golf team or something.”

“Why the golf team?” Louis asked as he entered the building. The air con hit him
immediately and was so cold that the hair on his arms stood up. He’d been outside in the heat
for so long that he’d almost forgotten how insufferable it actually was. Rubbing his hands
over his arms, he looked around the building.

It was a large open area filled with high top tables and TV screens. Behind that he could see a
buffet line that was clearly closed for the night and a dozen booths and tables. The whole
place was done up in blue and orange with natural wood tones.
“’Cause I’ve got no fucking clue who’s on it, so maybe no one else does either.” He cracked a
smile. They walked past rows of empty tables and Louis noticed a curved set of stairs leading
to a second floor, where more seating was.

“This is just for athletes?” he asked, a little stunned. It was really nice inside and he didn’t
imagine the other dining halls looked like this. He was in a shared house off campus with a
PhD student on the same scholarship type as him, so he’d not been in any of them before.

“Yeah, they finished it last year. It’s, like, crazy nice, but all these schools are trying to keep
up with each other on facilities. Athletics are where they make a lot of money, you know?”

“On swimming?” he tossed back mostly to be a dick, but Harry laughed, delighted.

“No, not on swimming. But we do have a few Olympians at our swim club and to keep them
here? Maybe.”

Louis’ eyebrows raised. He didn’t know a lot about sports, didn’t follow any but the
occasional Man U match, but the Olympics at least sounded like a big deal.

Harry led him around the side of the darkened food line and there was a mini fridge stacked
full and then several baskets with snacks next to it.

“You can have whatever. They restock it every morning.”

From inside the fridge Harry grabbed a juice and a mixed snack pack. Louis looked every bit
of it over. He was a poor law student and the prospect of free food would always be enticing.
After grabbing a drink from the case and a bag of Doritos as well as a sleeve of crackers, he
followed Harry to a line of booths built into the wall. They sat across from each other with
their snacks set out between them.

Louis tucked his ankle underneath him and ripped open the Doritos bag. “You want?”

Harry pulled a crisp from the bag. With it still in his hand, he asked, “So, how was your first
football game? Everything you imagined?”

“I’m not sure I imagined anything if I’m being honest. I only went because Lindsay’s
boyfriend slept with her cousin.” While Louis spoke Harry ate the crisp and then licked the
cool ranch seasoning off his thumb and forefinger.

“Boyfriends,” Harry said, shaking his head and rolling his eyes. “They always take you for
granted.”

“And turn you into a fool.”

Harry grinned back at him and Louis ate a crisp with his wrist curved in front of his mouth to
hide the smile he couldn’t shake off.

“But the game was great,” Louis tacked on. “I love American football now.”

“Oh, you do?”

“Sure, but I don’t think I’ll go again.” He twisted the cap off the Gatorade and took a sip.

“And why’s that?” Harry leaned back in the booth and his knee bumped Louis’ under the
table. He could just about feel the heat from Harry’s thigh, the tickle of his leg hair, with just
the barest distance between them.

“If my own personal announcer isn’t in my ear, what’s the point?” He raised an eyebrow at
Harry, who, if the lighting didn’t deceive him, pinked under the comment.

“I don’t think I talked that much.”

“Love, I don’t even know who won the game, but I know number 47 is in your macro
economics class and once told your professor he thought the course was about balancing his
diet.”

Harry let out a groan and covered his face with his hands, but Louis knew Harry was
blushing and he was delighted by it. He tucked his smile into his teeth, but then Harry
dropped his forehead to the table and he couldn’t help but laugh. Harry was smiling too.
Dropping his left hand, Harry turned to lay his cheek against the table. His eyes were closed,
the lashes of his left side fanned against the tabletop and his other hand flat against his face
from chin to hairline.

Louis nudged his knee against Harry’s and didn’t flinch it away afterwards. “I didn’t mind.”

Harry moved his arms to cross each other on the table and then laid his head on top of them.
Dimples were deep set in his cheeks, accompanied by a high flush all the way to his temples.
Louis had thought he was embarrassed, but he didn’t look to be. He was looking at Louis like
he didn’t mind him seeing the bright look in his eyes, the pink on his cheek, his teeth sunk
into his lips.

He was so gorgeous - pretty even with his curls curving around his ears and flopping over his
forehead. Like an oil painting came to life, stepping into the fluorescent lighting in a hideous
orange shirt and a golden tan.

Louis drank more of his Gatorade and Harry weaseled a cracker from the sleeve and crumbs
pooled under his mouth on the tabletop as he chewed.

“So,” Harry started changing the subject. His blush had calmed, but the very tips of his ears
were still red where they peaked out of his hair. “Law school?”

Louis stole a piece of cheese from Harry’s snack and then said, “What about it?”

“What made you want to do that?”

Louis chewed on a cracker with a cheese cube on it and thought of how to answer. There was
the one he gave in his law school interviews. There was the one he told his mum. And then
there was the truth.

“I could give you some kind of bullshit about wanting to help people and changing the world
through the law, but honestly I just want to make a lot of money. Thought about med school,
thought about engineering. But I don’t like science and I don’t like maths. Ever since I was
small the only thing anyone could agree on was that I talked too much. So: law school.”

“I guess that makes sense,” Harry said, his face still curved up in a smile. He’d had half a
thought Harry might judge that answer or might ask why, but he took Louis for face value.
“What’d you do in undergrad? Is there like a pre-law degree?”

Louis licked his lips, a crumb catching on his tongue, and moved his leg from against
Harry’s. He crossed both of his on the bench and leaned forward over the table, his elbow
pressed to the top and his chin in his hand.

“Some places there are. If I’d stayed in England for school, then definitely.” Louis picked at
the crisp bag, but didn’t take another. “I started in philosophy, but I met all of the most
insufferable people on planet earth, so I switched to history. I kept philosophy as a minor and
I did a French minor as well.”

“You can speak French?”

“Conversationally. I did a study abroad program and you basically completed the minor by
the time you were done.”

He spent one semester in Lyon, taking the train into Paris every other weekend. The school
had placed him with a family for a full immersive experience and he still received texts every
once in a while from his “mum” during the stay. A middle aged French woman, who was the
worst cook he’d ever seen, but took him to every single Boulangerie in the city limits.

“That’s really cool,” Harry said. “I can’t really do anything like that with swimming.”

“Is it all year long?”

“Yeah, pretty much.” He twisted the cap of his juice on and off a couple times before
continuing. “Plus, next year is an Olympic year? So it’s gonna be pretty crazy.”

Louis cocked his head to the side. “Is that something that is, like, a possibility?”

Harry blushed again, his chin dipping forward towards his chest and his teeth catching his
bottom lip between them. “Maybe. I’ve qualified for trials, but I’ve gotta get my times up
there to be competitive.”

“Wow, I guess I didn’t think when you said swimming you meant, like, swimming.”

“Yeah.” He let out a chuckle and ran a hand through his hair. “I’ve been trying not to think
about it. It feels really impossible, but I’m, like, just on the fringe of it, which is somehow
worse? You know? Like not a definite, laughable, no and on the other hand, it’s not an
absolute. Like it maybe feels like a reach, but I… it feels dumb to say it.”

Harry looked up at him with wide eyes. They were a soft green in the lighting. Clear all the
way through, like a perfect reflection of a lake in the middle of summer.

“What?” Louis jutted his chin forward, nudging him without reaching across to touch him.
“I just want it so badly.” He took a deep breath. “We all do, really. It’s like thrumming
through the whole team. And our coaches are going to be the Olympic coaches as well, so it
just feels like this extra level of pressure. Win SECs, win NCAAs, make the Olympic team.
Don’t embarrass yourself internationally. It’s in Paris, did you know? I just, I don’t know, it’s
all just, like… circling constantly.”

“A lot of pressure.” Louis had watched Harry’s face as he spoke. It had gotten more pinched
the farther he went down the list, like the weight of his own words were pressing him in and
pressing him down.

“Yeah, yeah. I mean I can handle it, of course,” he tacked on, as if Louis was going to doubt
him. “But yeah, I don’t know. It’ll become more real once we hit the new year.”

Louis ate a cracker, licked the crumbs from his thumb and eyed Harry. “I’ll have to teach you
a few phrases in French, so you’re prepared.”

“Would you?”

“Maybe we can trade off. I can swim, but I wouldn’t be winning any races.”

“Do you like the water?”

Louis shrugged. “Sure.”

Harry smiled at him across the table, a lazy, smug sort of thing, like Louis had said exactly
what he wanted to hear. There was a pile of discarded wrappers between them and nearly all
their snacks were gone with only a mess of crumbs left behind.

“Let’s go right now.”

“Go where?”

“Swimming.”

Harry had a devious little look on his face, like he was challenging Louis and half expected
him to dip out. “Alright.”

His smirk turned real, his cheeks dimpling and his eyes lighting up. “There’s a pool right
outside.”

They gathered up their rubbish and dropped it off in the bin before Harry led them to a set of
double doors. Through them he could see a pool deck, the pool itself glowing blue from the
underwater light. Harry pushed outside and they were hit with a wall of humidity.

“God, it’s gross out here,” Louis said, already tugging at his t-shirt.

“Yeah,” Harry agreed, but sounded like he didn’t mind. He probably didn’t if he’d lived here
all his life.
They stepped out onto the concrete. The pool was large, curved in a lazy way with a blue
lined fence running the perimeter. On one side were a row of cabanas and on the other a line
of lounge chairs. A hot tub was off by the end and behind that a small basketball court. Louis
let out a low whistle. He thought the dining hall was nice, but this was better.

“The practice football field is back that way,” Harry said with a wave of his hand. “And the
track team run behind us.”

Louis nodded, but he was starting to realize he knew very little about the world of college
sports. About the money invested in it.

Harry toed off his sneakers and pulled off his socks.

“What are you doing?” Louis sputtered at the sight of Harry’s bare toes against the tan
concrete.

“I thought we were swimming?” Harry tugged off his t-shirt and let it float to the ground next
to his shoes. His chest was tanned a golden brown and perfectly toned, shoulders broad and
then tapering into a thin waist, his ab muscles rolling under Louis’ attention.

“Do you have a suit?” Louis’ mouth felt dry.

“No.” Harry unbuttoned his shorts, pulled the zip down and then let them fall to his feet. He
kicked them off and was standing only in a pair of black boxers, tight on his muscular thighs
and hitting so high on his leg they might as well have been briefs. “You ready?”

He looked at Louis for a moment, that challenge back in his eyes, before he moved towards
the pool and did an effortless dive in. When he sunk beneath the surface Louis let out a
staggered breath and started tugging at his clothes. They fell to the ground in a rush and he
moved to the water just as Harry’s head popped back out. He brushed his hair back from his
forehead with his hand, but his eyes didn’t leave Louis as he moved towards him.

The last few steps towards the water he took as a run and then cannonballed into the water
right next to Harry. The water was still warm from a day of baking in the sun when he sank
underneath it. He blew the breath out of his nose and then swam back up.

When he broke the surface Harry was treading water next to him. He shook out his hair and
then pushed it back on his forehead, relishing how the water felt around him as he kicked his
feet lazily. Harry was smiling with just the tip of his chin under the water.

“You look pleased with yourself,” Louis said.

“I love the water,” Harry said, licking a drop off his bottom lip. His hand skimmed over the
surface slowly and his fingers were spread so that the water slipped in and between them.
“Swimming is like any other sport in that it takes a lot of discipline, a lot of practice. But I
think what it boils down to for most of us is we just love being in the water. It’s my favorite
place. Do you feel that way about anything?”
Louis tried to think of his favorite place to be as he kept himself afloat. A place where he felt
most comforted, most himself.

“No,” he settled on. “Is that a bad thing?”

Harry shrugged, his shoulders just barely visible in the water. “Maybe you just haven’t found
it yet.”

“Maybe.” Louis wasn’t sure though. He didn’t know that he was made for that sort of thing,
that calm undertone, the surety that Harry seemed to have.

Harry moved in the water, circling him slowly. “You can share mine for now, if you want?”

With each movement in the water, he’d ended up closer to Louis. He could track the droplets
of water on his neck falling from his hair, the green of his eyes glowing in the pool light. The
shadows of his dimples in the dark just a foot away. Close enough he could reach out and
touch.

“That sounds nice,” Louis replied, a little breathless. Harry smiled back at him, pleased by
his answer. “Have you always felt that way?”

Harry nodded. “Always.”

“Are you that sure about everything else?” Louis drifted closer.

Close enough he could see every single wrinkle in Harry’s face when his nose scrunched up.

“No, not usually.” He laughed, the water rippling out around his mouth. “Maybe only a few
times ever actually.”

They’d known each other only for a couple of hours, but there was this odd sort of peace over
them. Like in that pool he could have said anything, asked anything and Harry would answer.
Like it would be okay, like it was safe to say whatever he thought. It was unnerving in the
best way. To click with someone with such ease.

“Yeah? Like when?”

“Swimming, coming here.” Harry sank low in the water for a moment, so he was submerged
to just below his eyes. They reflected back in the water in an almost eerie way. “Meeting you,
I think.”

Louis moved just the barest amount closer. He could feel the gentle swish from Harry’s
movement in the water around his own legs. “What about me?”

“Dunno,” Harry said, his hand skimming against Louis’ forearm just briefly under the
surface. “The way you laughed when you could have fallen down twenty rows and gone
splat. I thought, I want to know him.”

“Because I could have fallen to my death?”

“Because you thought it was funny. You bumped into me and you apologized like you barely
felt bad about it, which should have been rude, but it wasn’t.”

Louis’ foot brushed Harry’s ankle and then his hand bumped Harry’s. “I didn’t feel bad about
it. Best thing that had happened to me all day, if I’m being honest.”

“Me too.” Harry skimmed his hand up Louis’ arm, this time on purpose, and curved around
his elbow. “Couldn’t stop talking to you, looking at you.”

Heat ran through him. He hummed and said, “Oh, yeah? Looking at what?”

Harry nodded, his chin hitting the water with the movement. His hand was still curled around
Louis’ elbow, a hot point in the warm water.

“I liked your smile,” Harry said and Louis was about to scoff, when he continued. “Like a lot
actually. Your teeth - here,” he thumbed his own incisors, “Sharp things aren’t they? They dig
right into your lip when you smile. I couldn’t stop staring at it.”

Louis flashed him a smile, dug his teeth into his lip. It was the weirdest sort of compliment
he’d ever received, but Harry’s eyes tracked the bite and stayed on his lips. There was enough
concentration in his gaze, hunger even, to have Louis fighting off a shiver in the warm water.

He slipped forward more, closer and closer to Harry. He wasn’t sure if it was Harry’s hold on
his arm pulling him in or the drift of his own body.

But when he said, “My mouth, huh?” it was just a breath away from Harrys’ own lips.

They were dark pink in the poor lighting, damp from the pool water and slightly parted. He
flicked his gaze back to Harry’s eyes, but they were still looking towards Louis’ lips. He
licked his own and watched Harry’s throat bob.

Louis moved that last inch forward and pressed his lips to Harry’s.

He sighed against Louis’ mouth immediately. The hand on his elbow moved to curve around
his bare back and pull them flush together. Their lips moved slowly over each other. Harry
tasted of chlorine and Cool Ranch Doritos, which seemed awful, but the kiss was so good
that Louis didn’t mind. He ran his tongue along Harry’s, along his lips, teased the roof of his
mouth and his teeth.

It was a heady thing, the push and pull of them together as they floated weightless in the
water. His arms moved around Harry’s neck to keep them from drifting apart. Harry’s right
arm was tight around his back and the fingers of his left brushed Louis’ thigh under the water.

Tugging at Harry’s lip in response - those teeth he liked so much dug right into his bottom
lip. Harry let out a low moan, more a rush of air than anything, but his hand flexed on Louis’
back and his hips stuttered forward. Louis smiled into his mouth tugging Harry’s lip again
and then licking over the bite.

“God,” Harry breathed out right against Louis’ mouth, his voice gone deep with arousal. He
licked his own lips, but just the barest of brush went over Louis’ as well.
Louis hummed, pressing his mouth against Harry’s again so he could feel the vibration
through where they touched. Harry’s hand on his thigh turned from a light touch to gripping
around the side of it, easily pulling his leg up in the water. He wrapped them both around
Harry’s waist and his hand slipped around to loosely hold Louis’ arse. It felt divine. A
weightless pressure in the water, just the barest bit of sensation, but it was enough to have
him sighing into Harry’s mouth.

Plastered right up against him he could feel Harry’s hips working his feet, so they were just
barely kicking to keep them afloat. He didn’t mind letting Harry do all the work, too focused
on the wet tangle of his fingers in Harry’s hair and the feel of Harry’s hands on his body.

His back hit the pool side before he realized they were moving, but Harry held his body at an
angle to keep their torsos pressed together. Louis’ cock was hard in his pants, the warm water
lapping at his skin and making his head feel a bit hazy with want.

Pulling back from Harry’s mouth, his tongue trailed behind his lips to get one last brush
before they were fully disconnected. The sharp sound of the breath he sucked in was the only
noise between them and his eyes opened to see Harry’s green ones already looking at him. He
wasn’t sure if they were dark from arousal or just the poor lighting, but it was attractive.
Heady. Louis ran a fingertip around Harry’s wet eyebrow, down his temple and cheek, to
brush lightly over his lips.

“You’re gorgeous.”

Harry’s eyes fluttered closed for half a second, a smile curving beautifully on his face. He
pressed a warm kiss high on Louis’ cheekbone, right next to his eye. His lips lingered there
for a moment, just hovering over his skin, before they moved to press at the corner of his
mouth and then over his lips once more.

He’d just brushed his tongue over Harry’s and twisted his fingers back into Harry’s hair when
a loud laugh echoed over the pool deck. They pulled apart, breathless, to hear a whole group
of people laughing and joking from over the fence. Both of them looked over, Louis’ heart
hammering loudly in his ears. Harry pushed back from him slightly and Louis’ legs slipped
from around his waist.

The group couldn’t be seen, but still the pair of them hovered a foot apart until they passed.
Until they could no longer hear them . Until it was quiet again. He watched Harry’s face
curiously as he looked towards the fence.

They hadn’t talked at all about sexualities or whether they were out. It was more that they
had both recognized something in each other, that attraction they both felt, and moved
without thinking. But now he wondered.

Louis’ breathing had just about returned to normal when Harry turned back to him. There
was a look on his face that Louis couldn’t quite read, but the heat between them had
dissipated.

“Give me a ride home,” Louis said, tasting the chlorine on his lips as he spoke.
Harry nodded, his chin dipping into the water with the movement. Louis kicked towards the
stairs, swimming on his back to keep his eyes on Harry, who took two strokes towards the
pool wall and then lifted himself up. His back and thighs flexed with the motion and all of a
sudden he was dripping on the pool deck. His underwear bunched up on the top of his thighs,
the muscles thick beneath them. Sparse hair ran down his long legs and Louis had the urge to
lick the water off of them. Harry pushed his hair back, his whole body shadowed in the poor
lighting and making the toning of his arms and abs and legs more noticeable.

“Gorgeous!” he called out and Harry bit his lip before he let out a laugh.

Louis climbed up the stairs and tried to wring out a bit of water from the leg of his pants as
he walked towards Harry. He still had a semi and he didn’t mind at all the way he could feel
Harry’s eyes snagging on it as he walked.

“Are there towels?” Louis asked.

Harry shook his head, his face a bit sheepish. “They usually have some out during the day,
but it doesn’t look like they do now. I have a couple in my car.”

Louis cocked an eyebrow. “And where did you park?”

“Just around the back of the building.”

“Alright.” He leaned over to pick up his clothes and tugged on his vans with no socks. “Do
you think we can get there without a public indecency charge?”

Harry laughed again and scooped his own clothes up, even his shoes. “I’ve been way more
indecent in public than this.”

Louis bit back a smirk. “Ready?”

Instead of answering Harry moved towards the door and he followed. The air con stung at his
wet skin and he was covered in goosebumps three steps in. They walked quickly through the
dining hall and the lounge. It was fully empty except for one student who was so engrossed in
their laptop they didn’t even notice two boys dripping through the building.

Pushing outside, he trailed after Harry through the near empty parking lot. He really was
gorgeous going in and out of streetlights with water droplets slowly dripping down his back.
Harry stopped behind a Range Rover and then he opened the boot, the rear lights flashing
twice as the door lifted.

“Fancy,” Louis said, eyeing the car.

Harry pulled out two towels from a bag in the boot and tossed one to Louis. “I did a couple
sponsorships last year and spent all of it on this car. Stupid, probably. But I feel really cool.”

Louis huffed a laugh and rubbed the towel over his hair. Harry ran it over his body quickly
and then pulled his shirt on, but didn’t bother with his shorts or shoes, just tossing them both
in the trunk instead. Louis rubbed the rest of himself down and then pulled just his shirt on
too, not bothering to take his shoes off to pull on his shorts.
He slung the towel around his neck and watched Harry as he straightened things in his trunk
before pulling it closed. Harry took half a step closer to him, reached out and tugged on the
towel. Louis stumbled forward slightly and Harry caught him with a hand curved around his
jaw. It was a quick kiss, just the barest bite to it, like a tease for later.

When they pulled apart, Louis moved towards the passenger door. He laid the towel on the
seat and Harry did the same next to him. When he turned the car on, a blast of cold air came
out of the vents.

“Fuck,” Harry swore and jabbed at the controls until it slowed down. Louis rubbed his hands
over his arms, which had broken out in goosebumps again. Harry pulled the car in reverse
and then asked, “Are you in the dorms?”

“No, I’m in a house off 5th Ave.” He crossed his ankles on the rubber floor mat. “I can give
you directions.”

“Just when we’re on the street.” Harry pulled the car out of the lot and turned onto University
Ave. “I was in the Swim House on 3rd last year, so I’m vaguely sure where you mean.”

“Is that, like, university sanctioned housing or just a bunch of people from the swim team
choosing to live together and calling it that?”

“The latter. They just rent the same house every year. A lot of sophomores move in out of the
dorms and then junior and senior year you find places with friends. I’m in an apartment this
year with a couple of teammates. Swim house was fun, but it could get kind of wild.”

“I bet.” Harry took a left and Louis watched out the windows as a bunch of quiet houses
passed them by. The clock on the dash was showing it just past eleven. It felt like it should
have been longer since the game, since they’d met.

“The blue one right there,” Louis said.

“With the ugly porch?”

“That’s the one. You can park on the left, Mina always parks on the right and I don’t have a
car.”

“You don’t?” he asked as he parked.

“No, I just walk to class.”

Harry’s face screwed up and Louis let out a low laugh at the sight. “It’s like a billion degrees
out.”
“I don’t have my license.”

“You don’t?”

Louis shook his head as Harry put the car in park in the drive. He’d wanted to learn once, but
hadn’t had the chance. “It’s not a big deal.”

Harry turned to look at him over the center console. His curls were still damp and messy on
his head, tan legs splayed out from the seat. He really was stunning and he was looking at
Louis like he was thinking the exact same thing. His eyes kept flitting over Louis’ face, like
he was cataloging every expression, every look.

Louis opened the car door and slid out. The towel was damp on the seat and hanging off the
end of it. With his feet on the ground, he turned back to Harry who was still looking at him
from the driver’s seat.

“You coming?”

A slow smile spread on his face.

Their car doors closed in a chorus, one after another, and, after grabbing their things from the
car, Louis moved towards the stairs to the porch. Just before he stepped onto it, Harry’s hand
came to rest on his hip. Not guiding him, not pushing him, just a point of contact. To keep
them together, connected. His body lit up under the attention, heat pooling out from that one
spot through the whole of him.

When he was on the porch and Harry was only half on the step below him, he turned in his
hold. Harry licked his lips, like he knew what Louis was thinking, and Louis pulled him in by
the back of his neck in reaction. His fingers slipped into Harry’s damp hair immediately.
Harry’s mouth was already open when they met in a kiss, his tongue pressing right against
Louis’ lips before anything else.

A laugh rumbled out of him and Harry smiled against him, but their lips stayed connected.
Hot and wet where their tongues ran over each other. Harry’s hand curled more firmly around
his hip and Louis tugged his hair in response. Then tugged him forward, moving his feet and
walking backwards towards the door.

Harry followed him mouth first. His other hand came up to grip Louis’ back, curving under
his arm and to lay firmly between his shoulder blades. It felt so good, so nice, to have his
body wrapped around Louis’, to be pressed firmly against him. To be caged in.

He let out a moan against Harry’s lips and his back hit the front door. Harry had him against
it immediately, his hips pushing right to Louis’. They were only separated by the thinnest
fabric of their underwear. He could feel the shape of him, the whole heat of him, right against
his stomach. His free hand scrabbled against the door, trying to get the knob to turn without
having to disconnect their mouths.

Just as his hand spun the knob, he leaned up on his toes, pulling himself higher and closer to
Harry’s body with the arm slung around his shoulders. His fingers pulled against Harry’s hair
sharply and Harry pulled him flush against his body.

The door swung open behind him and they all but fell over the threshold. Louis laughed
against his mouth and Harry’s arm around his back kept them pressed together, kept him from
falling over.

Harry kicked the door closed and Louis’ sucked on his bottom lip.

“Where’s your room?”

Louis licked along the seam of his lips. “To the right. Only door over there.”

Harry pressed a closed mouth kiss to Louis’ lips, but he chased after them when he pulled
away and then they were moving blindly towards his room. Louis bumped into the kitchen
wall and Harry tripped over a chair. They nearly toppled onto the couch and then his back hit
the door frame to his bedroom. It had been left mostly ajar when he’d left that morning and
he braced himself against it to turn Harry into the room. He closed the door behind him and
pushed Harry onto his messy bed.

The room was mostly dark, just the barest bit of light coming in from the poorly drawn
shades. Harry was a pretty picture on his bed. Sheets tangled around his body, his shirt riding
up over the waistband of his underwear. The wicked look on his face. Louis licked his lips at
the sight and thought of everywhere else he’d like to get his mouth.

He kicked off his shoes and Harry looked around the room quickly.

“You’re really messy.”

“Yeah,” Louis laughed.

“You don’t even make the bed,” Harry complained, but his face didn’t look bothered.

“Why would I? So you can just come in and mess it up?” He pulled his shirt back off and
tossed it in the general direction of his dirty clothes basket.

Harry leaned back onto his elbows. His gaze was hot on Louis as he moved closer to him. “I
don’t think you’d mind if I did.”

“No, I’m sure I’ll like you messy.”

Harry smirked and Louis climbed onto the bed and then onto Harry. He looked like he was
going to say something again, keep the banter going, but Louis kissed him instead. It was
heated immediately, with him straddling Harry’s hips so he could feel him hard against his
bum. He ground slowly down onto him and smiled at the choked off sound Harry made under
his lips.

Harry’s hands came to grip his hips again, then curved around his arse. His thumbs slipped up
under the legs of his underwear, which were already pushed high up his thighs. They were
hot points on his already overheated skin. Louis relished the feel of Harry’s hands on his
body, of Harry’s body underneath him.
As he kissed along Harry’s jaw, he felt Harry’s stubble rough on his tongue and lips. Louis
loved that they’d be red and sore afterwards because of it. He pulled at Harry’s ear lobe and
felt his hips jump underneath him, before biting under Harry’s jaw, gently, and then sucking
on the skin.

“Can you-” Harry started and then swallowed hard under Louis’ tongue. “Can you not leave
any marks? I’m at the pool six days a week so I can’t hide anything.”

Louis hummed, licking the spot again and then all the way down throat. He sucked gently on
Harry’s collarbone. “Whatever you want.”

Harry’s hands flexed on his arse, pressing him tighter over him. “Whatever?”

Louis sat back up, grinding more firmly over Harry. His hands tugged on his t-shirt and Harry
sat up so Louis could pull it over his head. “Whatever. I’m not picky.”

Harry stayed sitting up and moved his hands to pull Louis into a kiss. His thumb dug right at
his jawbone and then pressed against his pulse point. It had his heart hammering faster. The
pleasure soaring through his veins.

Pulling his mouth back, he kissed the corner of Louis’. “I don’t ever bottom during the
season.”

“Okay.” Louis tugged at his hair again to feel Harry’s hips jump underneath him. It was his
favorite thing he’d discovered - how responsive he was. He licked his lips and looked back
down to Harry’s. “Is it the season?”

A slow smile unfurled on Harry’s face, his lips pink and bitten, curving upwards and a flash
of his teeth in the moonlight. “No, it’s not.”

Louis tongue teased his lip and then he smiled back.

“So that was an invitation then?”

“I was just putting it out there.”

“A suggestion?”

“An option, really.”

Louis hummed and pressed his mouth back to Harry’s. It was hard immediately, both of their
lips moving fast and firm over each other. Their tongues dancing and teeth biting. Louis
pushed him back to the mattress and rolled his hips down rhythmically on Harry’s.

Then, he pulled back and sat up, stretching his arms over his head and smiling down at Harry.

Harry’s hands curved around his waist and then his thumb ran around the slope of his belly
button. So softly it was almost tender. Louis licked his lips as he watched Harry’s hands on
his body. The slow examination of him. Harry had probably the most perfect body Louis had
ever seen in person, let alone gotten his mouth on. He was hardly ever self-conscious about
his own and with the way Harry was touching him, looking at him, he wasn’t about to start
now.

Louis leaned over him and pulled open his bedside drawer. From inside he retrieved a new
bottle of lube and a condom. He left the condom on his nightstand and dropped the lube on
the bed.

He ran a hand down Harry’s chest. There was sparse hair on it and his fingers bumped over
muscles. “You really are so fit.”

Harry let out a surprised sounding laugh. “So are you, I’m just… I don’t know. Completely
thrown off by you. I think you’re the very last thing I expected to happen to me today.”

“Happy about it though?” Louis leaned down and kissed over his pec.

Harry ran a finger from his temple to his jaw, breathing out a quiet, “Yeah.”

Louis flashed him a smile and then ran his tongue along his incisor just to hear Harry huff out
a laugh. He kissed down his chest, tongued around his belly button before tugging on the
waistband of Harry’s underwear. They were still damp from their swim. Harry was hard
underneath, straining the front of them and he mouthed over the tip.

Harry’s hips shifted underneath him and Louis smiled against the fabric. He curled his fingers
under the elastic and Harry lifted his hips off the bed so he could pull them down. His cock
sprung out, hard and heavy between them. Louis shifted around Harry’s legs to get his
underwear all the way off and then tossed it behind him into the mess.

“I’m not sure I’ll find them again.”

“Shame,” Louis said, with little apology. He was endlessly pleased with himself, hand closing
around Harry’s cock to give it a dry stroke. His other hand tickled across the sharp tan line
low on his abdomen from his swimsuit. “You good?”

Harry nodded. He was propped on his elbows watching Louis with his tongue between his
teeth. His legs were spread around Louis’ hips now, the strong muscles framing Louis’
shoulders. He wanted to bite them, leave teeth marks in their flesh. But Harry had asked him
not to, so instead he mouth over them, leaving a trail of spit behind instead of bite marks.

Harry’s legs were tensing underneath him and Louis continued to stroke his cock slowly
while he worked his way up to his groin, then licked up the seam of his leg and hip. He tasted
sharply of chlorine and Louis nuzzled the skin there before sitting up slightly. Harry’s chest
was flushed from his ears to the tip of his cock, which was growing wet.

He licked around the head to taste him, sucking gently. Harry’s hands curled in the sheets and
Louis rubbed his tongue just under the crown to hear him whine high in his throat.

The bottle of lube was resting next to Harry’s hip bone and Louis grabbed it after rubbing his
thumb around the curve of his tan line. He sat up between his legs and licked the taste of
Harry’s precome off his lips.
Harry ran his hands up Louis’ thighs as he picked at the plastic seal around the bottle of lube.
Hot fingertips skimmed the waistband of his underwear, and slipped underneath to run across
his abdomen. Harry started tugging on them, his lips tucked between his teeth and his eyes
following each bit of skin he revealed. The stupid plastic wouldn’t come undone, so Louis bit
at it and started to pull with his teeth.

“Are you trying to tease me?” Harry’s eyes were dancing with laughter, a cheeky little grin
on his face.

Louis rolled his eyes, but couldn’t help smiling around the cap. Finally the plastic tore and
Harry’s hand dipped into his underwear. His fingers circled the base of Louis’ cock just as
Louis ripped the plastic off the cap and threw it to the floor.

“It’s literally a disaster zone in here, isn’t it?”

Louis opened the lube, finally, and smeared some on his fingers. Harry bent his legs up and
his hand slipped off Louis’ cock. “You can leave if you have such an issue with it.”

He pressed his middle finger to Harry’s hole. His rim fluttered beautifully around the touch.

“No,” Harry breathed out. “It’s great.”

“That’s what I thought.” He pushed in to the first knuckled and licked his lips around the feel
of it. Harry arched his back prettily on the bed, his chest sloping and gorgeous in front of
Louis. He pushed his finger all the way in and leaned forward to mouth around Harry’s cock
again.

“Feels good,” Harry said, running a hand through Louis’ fringe.

Louis hummed in response, pressing his tongue firmly against the tip as a sharp point of
vibration. Harry swore above him and he smiled around it. Louis teased a second finger
against Harry’s entrance and he glanced up to see Harry nodding for it.

Slipping it in, he pulled off Harry’s cock. He scissored his finger to stretch him out, watching
his mouth form a silent moan. Louis smiled, tucking his chin to his chest and watched his
fingers work.

“So gorgeous,” he said, more to himself than Harry, as his finger sank in again. He twisted
them and then dragged them against Harry’s walls, waiting for a reaction. It didn’t take long
for his breath to hitch, his legs to jerk, a bead of precome to bubble out the tip of his cock.

Harry hummed and Louis looked up at him, but his head was tossed back, his throat a
stunning line to where his hair pooled messily in the sheets. Louis looked back down to his
cock. A bead of precome was dripping down the side and he slowly licked it off while
rubbing his fingertips over that same spot.

He licked around the head and then ran his mouth back down Harry’s cock, holding it gently
between his teeth.
“Fuck,” Harry groaned loudly. One arm fell over his face and his other hand was twisted in
the sheets.

“Sorry,” Louis said, with little remorse in his voice. He pumped his fingers twice more, but
Harry kept his arm over his head. His chest was moving rapidly, still flushed and now with a
sheen of sweat. His lack of movement gave Louis a moment of self-doubt. “Was that
alright?”

“Yes,” Harry nearly squeaked. He clenched around Louis’ stilled fingers. “I’m ready, I’m so
ready.”

Louis leaned down and kissed his hipbone before rolling onto his back to kick off his boxers.
They had almost completely dried, except for, most notably, a dark wet spot on the front. His
cock was hard when it sprung out, weeping a bit at the tip. He was about to reach for the
condom when Harry grabbed it instead.

“Wanna ride you, if that’s cool?”

Louis nodded, scooting back on the bed.

“Thing is, my legs are fucked from this week of training and then standing at the game
today.” Harry tore the package carefully open. Louis was about to say it was fine, he didn’t
have to, when Harry continued speaking. “Might give up halfway through, as long as that's
okay with you?”

Louis let out a low chuckle. “Yeah, baby, I don’t mind. Anything in particular you want
afterwards?”

“Up to you, I’d say.”

He walked on his knees across the bed and then moved to straddle Louis’ thighs. Louis
pulled him in for a bruising kiss. He slipped the hand that had been inside of him around
Harry’s hips and curved over his arse. The muscle flexed under his hand and Harry’s tongue
fucked into his mouth. Louis slipped a finger back into his hole and Harry whined into his
mouth then sucked on his tongue.

They pulled apart with a string of spit still between them. His finger slipped from Harry’s
body and Harry slipped the condom from the packet before making a show of dropping the
wrapper over the side of the bed.

“Did I file that correctly?” Harry asked sweetly. He gripped Louis’ cock and gave it a few
strokes before starting to roll the condom on.

He could be offended, but he let out a loud laugh and said, “Perfect.”

Harry shuffled forward and then held Louis’ cock steady as he started to sink down.

Tight heat enveloped him and had his brain buzzing in pleasure. Harry was gorgeous spread
over his lap as he slowly took him in. Strong thighs gripped Louis’ hips and he ran his hands
over them, feeling the tension in them, the power.
“Feel so good, baby,” Louis said. His tongue ran over his bottom lip and his thumbs pressed
into the muscles in Harry’s legs. A moment later Harry’s arse met his thighs.

“You too,” Harry said. He braced a hand on Louis’ chest, his thumb just pressing against his
belly button, and started to work his hips.

The friction was delicious. Louis met Harry’s hips in shallow thrusts and moved a hand up to
twist at Harry’s nipple. Harry let out a long groan. When he moved to the other he noticed
something just underneath it.

“Do you have extra nipples?”

Harry huffed a laugh, the flexing of his abdomen with it causing him to squeeze around
Louis’ cock. Saliva pooled in his mouth and he thumbed over the two smaller spots on his
chest.

“I ate my twin in the womb.”

“Did you really?”

Harry nodded then twisted his hips and let out a stunning moan, his head falling back and his
chin jutting towards the ceiling. Louis gripped his hips in both hands and started working
them faster.

Harry was letting out a series of breathy huffs, like the moans couldn’t even fully form as he
was bombarded with pleasure. Louis could feel his own arousal tight in his abdomen, right
underneath where Harry’s cock was drooling blurts of precome into his pubic hair.

“Fuck, fuck,” Harry moaned, his body slowing down and pulling him in tight circles. “Feels
so good, but I’m-”

Louis didn’t even let him finish, rolling them over and hitching Harry’s left leg high over his
shoulder. The other wrapped around his waist and he pushed back in. Harry let out a cry that
turned into a long moan.

He set a brutal pace, pushing Harry’s hips up with his. Harry’s leg bounced on his shoulder
and his foot hit his back lightly with each thrust. The rhythm of it was hot in a mesmerizing
sort of way that had Louis feeling a bit lightheaded.

Harry was a mess on the sheets below him. He had a hand curved up under the pillow,
scrabbling at the headboard but there was nothing to hold onto. His other hand was curved
around his own thigh, keeping it up high on Louis’ waist.

Messily he kissed Harry's knee where it was laying next to his face. More of a brush of his
lips and tongue than anything else, but enough that Harry’s tongue popped out of his own
mouth anyway in response.

He sped up his movements. Hurtling towards his orgasm, so quickly he was lightheaded with
it. He used his right hand to reach for Harry’s cock where it was angry and weeping on his
stomach. Harry hissed when he took it in hand and then his whole body arched into the touch.
His legs shook around Louis as he tugged him in time with his thrusts.

Harry’s head turned to the side, his lashes fluttering and his mouth falling open on a moan as
come started spurting from his cock, painting his chest. His arse clenched down around Louis
and it was only a few more thrusts before he spilled into the condom.

His hips slowed and Harry continued to breathe heavily underneath him. Pulling his hand off
Harry’s cock, he licked the come off his fingers, and his own cock gave a feeble twitch where
it was still buried in Harry’s arse.

Harry watched him with a clear gaze, his eyes bright in the post orgasm haze. Louis kissed
his knee again, this time more tenderly, before pulling out. He leaned over Harry to kiss him
quickly on the lips, just long enough for Harry to slip a bit of tongue in, before he fell over
onto the bed next to him.

Louis was breathing harshly into the room, his chest rising and falling in rapid succession
still from the high. He looked over to Harry, who was already facing him. He had his bottom
lip between his teeth, but he was holding in a smile.

“I could use a shower,” he said, trailing a finger through the mess on his stomach. Louis
nearly leaned over to lick it off, but didn’t.

“Do you think your legs could carry you that far?”

His lip popped out of his teeth and a genuine smile curved on his face. “If you were there to
hold me up.”

Louis leaned forward and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips. They’d just come, but the heat was
still there between them. The attraction hadn’t died at all. “I could do that.”

They kissed for a few minutes more before they both squeezed into his small shower. They
washed each other slowly and as the last of the soap was going down the drain, Louis went to
his knees on the tiles and sucked Harry down. He came with a hand in Louis’ hair and his
knees shaking around Louis’ head.

Afterwards they dried each other off and fell naked into his bed. They kissed slowly until
they fell asleep with their legs tangled in the sheets.
 September
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes

Louis woke to several loud dings in a row echoing through his room. His face was pressed to
Harry’s back, smooshed into his shoulder with his nose nearly in Harry’s armpit. It was warm
in all the places they touched despite the air con pumping out freezing cold air.

Harry groaned into the pillow he was facedown against and slapped a hand down over his ear
to try to block the sound. Louis watched him with half-lidded eyes. The sun was shining
brightly through that small crack in the curtains and was casting a stripe of light across
Harry’s back right above where Louis’ arm was curled around his waist.

He’d almost expected him to be a dream once morning came. Meeting him had felt surreal,
like something that would have only happened in a fantasy. Even with him real and still in his
bed, Louis felt the same pang he’d felt in the stadium after the game ended. Was this it?

“Is that your phone?” Louis asked, pressing a dry kiss to Harry’s shoulder. His voice was
raspy from sleep and he watched with curiosity as goosebumps rose down Harry’s back from
his words. He trailed a finger down his spine, felt those tiny bumps under his fingertips like
grazing the skin of an orange.

Harry’s back muscles contracted with a shiver and then he turned over under the sheets to
face Louis. Louis’ head fell back on his pillow and he looked across the queen sized bed at
him while the alarm was still beeping intermittently. They were both ignoring it.

Harry had a crease down his face from the pillow and a sleepy smile. His eyes were puffy and
a little crusty, with his hair flopping all over the place after they fell asleep with wet hair. He
was just as stunning as Louis had remembered.

“I have a team meeting at nine,” Harry said. His voice was deep with sleep and the words
came out slower than usual. He stretched his arms over his head and then twisted his back.
Louis watched with awe, with delicious appreciation, as the muscles rippled under perfectly
tanned skin. “I had an alarm set an hour early for it. Sorry it woke you up.”

“I don’t mind.” Louis shifted his legs under the cool sheets and his toes bumped Harry’s bare
calf. He kept them pressed against his skin. He didn’t want him to leave.

“I’ve got to go soon,” Harry said, but didn’t move.

Louis nodded, scooting forward slightly. Harry moved with him like they were being pulled
towards each other without choice, without force, without conscious thought. They met
between their pillows in a closed mouth kiss. Louis ran his hand around Harry’s waist, his
fingers just light skimming the soft skin there. Harry had a hand on his thigh underneath the
sheets and slipped up higher with each languid press of their lips. His cock started to fatten
up and he remembered they’d fallen into bed the night before with nothing on.
Harry’s phone chimed louder and in response he curved a hand around Louis’ thigh and
tugged his leg over him. The sheets tangled between their bodies, wrapping their legs
together so Louis could hardly move. But he didn’t need to, with Harry’s hand petting the
inside of his thigh and the bite of his teeth on Louis’ bottom lip.

It felt so good - the slow drag of their lips, the hazy Sunday morning light warming his back,
and the soft touch of their hands on each other’s skin. He wanted to sink into this feeling and
soak in it all day.

A loud buzzing started across the room, different from the noise before, and Harry pulled his
mouth back. They were so close that his eyelashes brushed Louis’ cheek as he opened his
eyes. “Think someone’s calling me.”

Louis hummed, but didn’t move off Harry, didn’t stop slowly petting his back, didn’t stop his
lips from kissing over his cheek and under his jaw. Harry laughed, airy and high, his fingers
squeezing Louis’ thigh tightly before skimming up his side and out of the sheet all together.

The buzzing stopped and started back up again. Against Harry’s throat, Louis mumbled a
drawn out, “Nooo.”

Harry laughed again and scooted off the bed. Louis fell back against the mattress and then sat
up on his elbows to watch Harry walk across his room in the nude. All that had been running
through his head since he bumped into him the day before was how gorgeous he was, like a
marquee in his brain that just said HARRY IS SO FIT on loop. With him naked in the
morning sun, his hips softly curving into strong thighs, where his cock hung half hard against
them - well that wasn’t about to change.

Harry planted his hands on his hips and looked around Louis’ floor. It was a disaster of
clothes and papers and books. He usually knew where things were in the mess, but he had no
idea where Harry flung his clothes when they crashed into his bedroom the night before.

“Maybe-” Louis started and Harry shushed him immediately and then dropped to his hands
and knees on the hardwood. “What are you-”

Harry cut him off with another shush and then crawled along the floor to under the window
just as the buzzing cut off. Louis couldn’t help watching him, amused. His pert arse was
sticking up in the air as he kneed across the room, almost an innocent sort of look if it wasn’t
for what they’d been up to not eight hours before.

“Aha!” He sat up with his shorts in his fist, triumphant. “Sorry, I was trying to follow the
sound.”

Louis smiled back at him, couldn’t help it really with the goofy look on his face. Harry’s
fingers flew over the phone as if he was texting someone back and Louis climbed out of bed.
Maybe he would have felt shy about it, crossing the room naked in the morning sunshine, if
Harry wasn’t already sitting cross-legged on his floor without a care in the world. From his
drawers Louis grabbed a pair of boxers and slipped them on, tossing a second pair onto the
bed for Harry.
“We’re never finding yours, let’s be honest with ourselves.”

Harry laughed up at him, standing up and then slipping on Louis’ underwear. They were just
on the right side of too tight - stretching deliciously around him.

“I should get going,” Harry said, frowning down at his phone.

Louis bit his lip. “Let me make you breakfast.”

Harry ran a hand through his hair and Louis wanted to get his hands back on his body. He
could barely pull his eyes away from his chest, his jaw, his hips. It sounded a little breathless
when Harry answered, “Okay.”

Louis smiled with his teeth digging into his lip and pulled on a pair of joggers from the floor.
Harry tugged on his shorts and followed Louis, shirtless, out of his room. The main living
area was abandoned. Mina must have been either still sleeping or already gone for the day.
They hardly ever saw each other, which worked perfectly for both of them.

Their kitchen was small, but it worked out okay. They didn’t have space for a table so usually
Louis ate on the couch or in his bedroom. The whole place was furnished by the university,
so nothing was nice, but at least it was functional

“Do you have, like, a special diet or anything?” Louis pulled open the fridge door and Harry
leaned back against the counter next to him.

“No, not really. We don’t have practice today, just a meeting. So whatever you want to
make.”

Louis grinned to himself. “You ever had a full English?”

“A what?”

“Like, a classic English breakfast?”

“No,” Harry said, his lips pulling into a smile.

“Well, you aren’t today either. But I’ll give you an attempt.”

From the fridge and freezer, Louis pulled out the ingredients he’d need and piled them next to
the bread on the counter.

“How do you like your eggs?”

“What do you recommend?”

“I like a runny yolk,” Louis said, opening the bag of bread and popping two slices into the
toaster. “But I can make them scrambled if you prefer.”

“Nah, let’s do it your way.”

He moved around Harry seamlessly, the whole process a familiar dance for him. The
hashbrowns went into Mina’s air fryer and there were two mismatched frying pans on the
hob. He popped a few pieces of bacon in one and a glob of butter in the other.

“A proper fry up would have beans, but I can’t stand them.”

“You eat beans for breakfast?”

“Well I don’t. But, yeah. It’s not like the baked beans you do here, they are a tomato base.
But I can’t stand any of them.”

Harry smiled at him a little quizzically, maybe even verging on fond. “Can I help with
anything?”

“No, you’re good.” Louis flipped the bacon and then cracked the eggs into the other pan.
He’d spent a lot of his childhood cooking and it had slowly gone from something horrendous
to a couple decent meals under his belt. But this was his specialty. Sometimes it felt like
luxury only to be cooking for himself, or even now just for the two of them. There was
something serene in the practiced motion.

“You look cute like that.”

Louis looked up from the eggs to see Harry leaning over with his elbow on the counter, just
watching him. He stuck his tongue out at him. “Okay, I changed my mind. Can you grab
plates? They are in the cabinet to the left of the sink.”

Harry nodded. As he passed behind Louis, he squeezed his hip and then trailed his fingers
along the waistband of his joggers. Goosebumps ran down his legs and he fought off a full
body shiver.

The toast popped behind him and with his eyes still on the eggs, he stretched to open the
fridge to pull out the raspberry jam he had inside. Harry set the plates down next to him and
he lifted the eggs from the pan onto their plates, then the bacon, and a piece of toast each.
Just as he was starting to butter them the timer on the air fryer went off. He balanced the
knife precariously on a plate and dumped the hashbrowns out with the rest of their food.

“That looks really good,” Harry said over his shoulder.

Louis shrugged, but a flash of pride ran through him. “Go ahead. There’s jam there and salt
and pepper next to the fridge.”

They both gathered their plates and Harry kissed the side of his head before sliding up to sit
on the countertop next to the stove. Louis hopped onto the one across from him and they both
ate slowly.

He was facing the microwave and couldn’t help snagging on the time. He wasn’t ready for
Harry to leave. He dipped his bread into the yolk and around the next bite Louis said, “Did
you say it was a team meeting you had today?”
Harry nodded, swallowing. “It’s just ‘cause it’s the start of the month and we don’t have our
first meet till nearly the end. So it’s just like a team building, hype session mostly. We tend to
fool around in the pool afterwards.”

“That sounds fun,” Louis said, licking off his fork. Harry’s eyes zeroed in on the movement
and Louis couldn’t help smiling at him. “Do you have practice a lot?”

“Monday through Saturdays and then doubles three times a week. Fridays are just for us. The
distance swimmers I mean.”

Louis raised an eyebrow. “That’s a big commitment.”

“For sure, but I’ve been swimming like that since I was, like, twelve. So it’s all routine now.”

Louis nodded, took another bite of his eggs. “When you say distance… I mean how far can
you be swimming? Are you just going back and forth a million times?”

Harry laughed quietly, more to himself than at Louis. “I can do up to 1650 meters at a time
depending on the meet. It’s basically swimming a mile. But since we do short course in
college, the pool is only 25 meters, so it's not quite a million times. But pretty close.”

“Shit,” Louis muttered. “That sounds exhausting.”

Harry nodded, but he was smiling. “I love it.”

Louis laughed around a piece of bacon and then asked, “What do you love about it?”

Harry’s legs kicked lightly at the cabinets. His plate was nearly empty in front of him, just the
hashbrown left. He picked it up and took a large bite out of it, seemingly thinking over Louis’
question while he ate.

Once he swallowed, he said, “It’s nice to turn off your brain for a while, that’s what I liked
about swimming distance when I was younger. That I could just jump into the pool or the
ocean or whatever and swim until my arms and legs were so sore I couldn’t imagine taking
another stroke, another kick, and then keep pushing. Now, I don’t know, still all that, but
there’s a big mental part to a race that long. There’s a lot of strategy in when to push, when to
change up how you’re swimming. I really like that.”

Louis cocked his head to the side and took in the thoughtful expression on Harry’s face. He
wondered what had made him want to swim until he couldn’t. What had a younger version of
him trying to get away. But he understood that feeling. The urge to look for an escape, to
think of nothing at all, just for a little while at least, so deeply inside of him. He wanted to
ask, to know. But it wasn’t the time, they weren’t in the place for that.

Instead, he kept it light. “So you don’t just swim all out for a mile?”

“God no,” Harry laughed. “You’ll have to come watch sometime, see how it all works.”

Louis smirked, licked the bacon grease off his lips and then put his empty plate on the
counter next to him. “Guess so.”
The time on the microwave was inching ever closer to the hour. He wasn’t sure if Harry
needed to go back to his first or what, but he knew his time with him was coming to an end.

Harry slid off the counter and set both their plates in the sink. “I could wash these?’

He was looking at Louis over his shoulder and a wave of fondness washed over Louis.

“Come here.”

A dimple pushed into Harry’s cheek as he turned away from the sink and took the few short
steps to Louis. He slid easily between his legs. With Louis still on the counter, he was half an
inch shorter than him, just enough that Louis was looking down to see the pink on his cheeks,
the glittering in his green eyes.

“I have to go in a minute,” Harry said, but ran his hands along Louis’ thighs and around to
his arse.

Louis licked his lips and hummed in agreement, before pulling Harry forward by a hand in
his hair. His mouth was already open on a gasp when they connected and his fingers flexed
on Louis’ bum, while their lips pushed and pulled against each other. Louis tightened his legs
around Harry’s hips, squeezing him as close as he could. One of his hands stayed tugging at
Harry’s hair and the other roamed his bare torso.

He was drawing Louis’ body closer to the edge of the countertop with every drag of their
tongues. Louis could feel him hard against his leg and wanted to press against him as close as
he could.

With a palm pressed flat to Harry’s back, Louis tugged him in. Their bodies fell flush and
Louis sighed against his lips. Harry’s mouth moved to kiss his cheek and then his throat. The
warm press of Harry’s tongue had his pulse skyrocketing and heat pooling low in his belly.
He wanted to arch into Harry, to spread him back out in his bed and keep him there.

His eyes fluttered open as Harry worked his way down his neck, sucking at his pulse point
and then nibbling on the juncture with his shoulder. His eyes fell on the clock again as
Harry’s fingers started to slip beneath his waistband.

“What time did you have to go?” he asked on a moan.

Harry licked over his collarbone, kissing across the sharp curve of it and then said into his
skin, “no later than ten to.”

The clock didn’t lie and Louis let out an annoyed sigh.

“Time is it?” Harry asked, working his way back up Louis’ throat.

He licked his lips and willed the clock to stop. Just for a little bit, just for an hour. But it
clicked over, another minute gone. “8:48.”

Harry kissed him once more on the lips, just a gentle peck before pulling back. The hand that
was on Harry’s chest fell slowly down the front of him, one last touch, before falling off
entirely.

“Do you think we can find your shirt in two minutes?”

Harry smiled slowly. “No. I don’t even think you’ll be able to find it in a year.”

Louis pursed his lips around a smile, so pleased with the person in front of him.

Another minute clicked pass and Louis slid off the counter as Harry moved out of the
kitchen. At the front door, Harry gave him another slow kiss before opening the door.

“I’ll see you around?” he asked.

Louis nodded and Harry gave him a grin before going down the porch steps. Louis shut the
door with a groan. There went the love of his life, probably.

Walking back into the kitchen, he glared at the counter Harry had just been sat on, then glared
at the dishes in the sink, before he started to wash them.

He’d only just sudded up a frying pan when he heard the front door open and he looked to the
kitchen door to see Mina walk in. Her dark hair was piled on her head, her glasses slightly
askew and a hand was rubbing over her face.

“Long night?” He couldn’t tell if she was just getting home from the night before or if she’d
gone out early that morning. She had on a smock dress that was hanging off her shoulder and
a sports bra underneath. Mina’s style was so casual, so throw together, he could think she was
going to bed and she was really heading out to a cocktail party.

“Just ran out for a breakfast meeting with my TA,” she said offhandedly. From the fridge she
grabbed an apple and took a sharp bite of it. “Was that Harry Styles leaving?”

Louis looked up from the sink. She took another bite and then licked a drop of juice off her
thumb. He wasn’t sure how to answer that question, least of all because he just realized he
didn’t even know Harry’s last name.

“Do you know him?”

“No,” she said and then snorted. “There’s a floor to ceiling mural of like three guys on the
swim team outside my Chem Lab. Harry Styles is closest to the door, so I see him every day.”

“That’s-” Louis started to say, but he wasn’t sure how to finish. “Seems excessively large.”

She hummed. “His nipple is like bigger than my fist.”

Her hand curled around the apple and she held it out to him in emphasis.

“All four of them?” he asked without really thinking and then his neck went hot.

Mina smirked, like he’d just confirmed something she’d wanted to ask. Her tone had gone
teasing when she said, “I can’t say I looked that closely.”
Louis looked stubbornly down at the pans in the water, scrubbing them vigorously even
though they surely were clean. He blustered a bit, only managing to get out a bashful
sounding, “Well then.”

Mina hid her smile behind an apple and left the kitchen. When the floor creaked outside of
her bedroom, he called out, “Where was your Chem Lab again?”

Her laughter was the last thing he heard before her door closed. His hands were coated in
soapy water all the way up to his elbows and he hung his head over the sink. He stayed that
way until his blush faded, until a master plan started to form.

Louis was just leaving his second class on Monday when a FaceTime call popped up. He
ducked around the side of the building towards a row of benches under swaying Spanish
moss before answering.

The screen slowly loaded and then Niall and Oli’s faces popped up on the screen.

“Hold on,” he said, fishing his Airpods from his pocket. He popped them in and when the
noise canceling kicked in, he said, “How are you guys?”

Oli’s nose scrunched on the screen, his hair a shocking orange against the white background.
“I hate med school.”

Niall laughed so loud the sound became distorted in his ears.

“I knew you’d hate it! Didn’t I tell you that?”

Louis nodded, smiling at his friends. Oli scowled back.

Niall continued, “Just quit.”

“No,” Oli barked, shaking his head. “If I quit then Luke wins and if Luke wins then I might
as well cease to exist.”

“Who is Luke?” Louis asked.

“My Med School Nemesis,” Oli said like they should already know that, but Niall looked just
as confused as him. Oli sighed and rolled his eyes at them. “He cuts me off every single time
I speak. I want to jab a scalpel in his throat. He better fear for his life when we get to
dissection.”

“I’ll find a place to bury the body,” Louis added helpfully.

“I have space in my trunk, if need be,” Niall tossed out.

Oli rolled his eyes at both of them. “Lou, how’s Law School? Make me regret science.”

He laughed. “It’s fine. Stupid, hard. I spend more time in the library than anywhere else, but
what’s new?”

“Amen,” Oli said.

“Every time we all talk I remember how much I don’t miss school.”

Louis gave Niall the middle finger.

Niall laughed and propped his chin on his hand. He worked from home half the week and
Louis could see the telltale collage of them from uni in the background, the one with Niall
lying on the floor of the lift in their first year with his middle finger in the air, blitzed out of
his mind, right on the edge. It was so small on camera, Louis wouldn’t have been able to
recognize it if he hadn’t put the whole thing together with Niall when he helped him move in.
He’d helped him move into his apartment in Boston the week after graduation and crashed on
his couch for a few days before flying home to England.

“Do you have a nemesis yet?”

“No, although I think I might be someone else’s.” Louis tucked his legs up onto the bench.
He was never a popular person in school. His answers were always too quick, too righteous
and other people tended to find that annoying. It wasn’t something he ever minded, but he
could already see glares cast his way across the room. “I do, however, have news.”

Oli raised an eyebrow and sat back in his desk chair. “This should be good.”

“Fuck off,” Louis said cheerfully.

Niall laughed loudly again. “Tell us the goss, Lou.”

Louis gave them a moment of suspense, adjusting his fringe in the camera lens and then the
collar of his shirt.

“I have met, quite possibly, the most attractive man on planet Earth.”

“In Florida?” Oli said immediately, his face scrunched up. “Seems unlikely.”

Niall’s hands were in front of his face, but they were doing little to block the way his
shoulders were shaking and the little huffs of laughter he was letting out. Louis scowled at
the pair of them, but Oli was looking pleased with himself.

“Yeah, in Florida. Twist of the century, I know.”

“I don’t believe it,” Oli said.

“He’s on the swim team,” Louis sighed, wistfully thinking of Harry’s body arcing through the
water Saturday night and then his wet hair on Louis’ pillowcase after their shower. “Distance
swimmer. Do you know what that means, Oli?”
“No.” He scrunched his nose, then stuck out his tongue. “Ugh a jock, though.”

Louis sighed loudly and Niall took pity on him. “What does it mean?”

He pinched his fingers together for emphasis and then raised it high enough they could see
them on screen. “Stamina.”

They both rolled their eyes and groaned, but Louis laughed loudly. The walkway he was
sitting in had little traffic usually and was completely empty now. Part of him wished he’d
been able to find somewhere inside to take the call because the heat was sweltering. He’d
been trying to have a mind over matter approach with it. If he thought he could handle it, then
he could. If only that would start working for sweat.

“You’re so dumb,” Niall said.

“Maybe so, but I could hardly care after Saturday night.”

“Oh, so you didn’t just meet him then?” Oli teased.

Louis smirked at the screen, then batted his lashes innocently. “No comment, but if I start
caring about sports you cannot judge me. I’ve seen the light.”

“Is that what they call it these days?” Niall asked.

Oli was laughing and they both ignored the middle finger Louis sent them.

“Well did you take a pic or something, as proof he’s the hottest man alive?”

“No, Oli, I didn’t snap a pic while having sex with him. I’m pretty sure I’m a couple classes
away from learning how that’s a crime.”

Oli held his hands out in front of him, as if to absolve himself from the statement or just say,
and what about it? Louis wasn’t sure. Either way it was funny.

Niall had propped his phone up and he could hear him typing on his computer. It was the
middle of his workday, to be fair. “What’s his name?”

Louis licked his lips and relished saying it. “Harry Styles.”

Niall was silent for a moment, his head cocked to the side and his eyes scanning just off
screen. It was long enough for Louis to narrow his eyes.

“Okay, he’s cute. I’ll give you that.”

Louis’ jaw dropped. “Did you Instagram stalk him?”

Why hadn’t he thought of that?

“No, of course not.” Niall sounded almost offended. “I just pulled up their roster. Business
major, huh? Boring. But he’s an All-American, that must mean he’s good. And those are
some very small swim shorts, so I do see your point.”

Louis squawked, but Oli said, “Text me the link!”

Niall grinned back at them both and said, “Oh I already did, don’t worry.”

Oli cackled gleefully and his face disappeared from view. A second later he was saying,
“Yeah, not bad, Lou.

“Thanks guys,” Louis said, rolling his eyes. Oli popped back on screen. “Like I said, the
hottest man on Earth.”

“So, are you seeing him again?” Niall asked.

“Somehow.” Louis smiled innocently, but both his best friends narrowed their eyes on screen.

“You aren’t going to stalk him are you?” Oli winced on screen.

“Why would you say that?”

“Well, remember-”

“Don’t bring him up. It’s irrelevant.”

“Is it?’ Niall asked, his voice going high.

“It is and I hate you both.” Louis tossed them both glares. “Niall, you’re up. How’s Boston?”

“Fine,” he said, shrugging.

Louis cocked his head. Niall was never a one word kinda guy. “Have you met your nemesis
yet?”

“Or the hottest man on Earth?” Oli chimed in.

Niall’s nose scrunched up. “I’ve met both and they are the same person.”

“Plot twist.” Louis leaned forward on the bench.

“This sounds like it’ll be good. Next time warn me you both have juicy stories so I can grab
snacks. All I had was Luke.”

“There’s no juice,” Niall protested, but Louis was laughing at the flustered look on his face.
“It’s just my coworker Zayn.”

“Zayn,” Louis emphasized. “He does sound hot.”

Oli was nodding. “Does he have a last name or is it just Zayn, like Beyoncé?”

“He has a last name,” Niall scoffed, rolling his eyes. “But I’m not telling you losers. He’s just
an ass to me all the time. We share a desk in the office so I hardly ever see him, but he leaves
everything a mess and it feels so disrespectful. Like we have a shared workspace, you know?
And I tried to talk to him about it. Like I went in on my work from home day and the look he
gave me? The rudest thing I’ve ever seen.”

Oli was frowning and Louis scrunched his nose. “I hate that for you.”

Niall sighed dramatically. “I know I can be… overbearing, some might say, with mess. But I
tried to talk to him about it and since he blew me off it just feels like game on.”

“Oh there’s a game now?” Louis said, intrigued.

Oli laughed. “You’re in Lou’s territory now.”

“Not that kind of game,” Niall defended. “There’s no love and war, just war.”

“Well that’s no fun,” Louis teased. “Especially if Zayn is your hottest man alive.”

“He’s nice to look at, but I can’t stand him. Thankfully we never have to work at the same
time.” Niall sighed and then waved his hand around dramatically. “I need a topic change.”

Oli nodded and then launched into a story about his roommate in Chicago and then in a long
and winding tale about a pizza trail they went on. By the time he finished, Niall had a Zoom
meeting to get to and Louis had his next class scheduled.

They said their goodbyes and Louis grabbed his bag before standing up off the bench. His
whole body felt like it was overheating from forty five minutes in the midday heat and he
shook his shirt out as he made his way to his class.

His phone was still clutched in his hand, so when it vibrated with a text, he was able to check
without even breaking his stride.

Niall

Niall: but fr you aren’t doing

anything rash right?
Louis: I’m not insane you know?
Niall: ...
Louis: but I think I left my keys in
his car so I’m gonna need
those back
Niall: “you think” 🧍
Louis snorted and locked his phone. He pushed open the door to the building and felt a rush
of the air con wash over him. He’d have to find Harry somewhere on campus to get his keys
back, since he’d never managed to get his number. Shame.

+
It took a couple days to get the timing right and by then he really did need his keys back.
He’d lost the one for his study cubicle right under Harry’s seat where it fell from his hand and
then he might have accidentally kicked it under the seat. Possibly.

On Thursday, Louis piggy backed off a group of girls heading into the dining hall Harry had
taken him to. He was pretty sure it was the volleyball team - every single one was taller than
him - but they held the door when he jogged up behind them and then made a joke about
what food was going to be on offer, which he laughed at, but didn’t know the context for.

He’d slipped in there on Tuesday, as well, behind someone who was actually on the golf team
(Garrett) and Louis had sputtered through a lie about being a walk-on to the track team. But
when he’d done a pass around the building and then the pool deck, just to be sure, Harry
hadn’t been there.

In his head, this was a fun, flirty place to track him down. If he had to resort to practice or
even worse the business school, then he’d really deserve all the flack his best friends gave
him.

But, now, following the volleyball team inside and laughing with them about chicken
Parmesan, he had hope. It was just before dinner and the hall was fuller than either time he’d
been there.

“I’m meeting some friends, I’ll see you next time!” Louis called as he started moving away
from the girls.

In a chorus, they called, “Bye Louis!”

He laughed to himself as he walked around the high top tables in the center of the room. His
bag was slung over his shoulder, heavy from a whole day’s worth of classes and studying,
and it bumped against his back as he made his way through the athletic hall. He’d only just
curved around the back wall near the virtual golf station when he saw Harry and three other
guys at a table across the room.

He eyed them as he moved closer. There were various textbooks and laptops on the table and
a few plates of food spread between them. One of the guys was gesticulating a lot as he told a
story and Harry watched him bemused. His face looked different here, like he was someone
else. There was no wide grin, no dimples, and when the whole table erupted in laughter,
Harry’s head didn’t toss back, but instead he only grinned to himself.

It struck him as curious.

When he was just a couple steps from the table, Harry looked over his friend’s shoulder and
caught his eye. A familiar smile curled on Harry’s lips and calmed the uneasiness he’d felt
seeing Harry again.

He stopped just behind Harry’s friend, who had a shock of blond hair and wide shoulders
stretched beneath a hideous pastel button down.
“Harry, hey,” he said, wishing his voice sounded more casual when it came out.

Each person at the table turned to him and Harry’s smile seemed to sink deeper in his face.

“Louis,” he drawled, but he looked pleased, his dimples making crescents in his face. “This is
Mike, Ritchie, and Franz.”

He pointed to each of them in turn and they each nodded or gave a wave in his direction.

Louis waved back halfheartedly. “Nice to meet you, lads.”

“Louis, is on the golf team,” Harry said, but his mouth was twitching like he was about to
laugh. It was a good thing no one else was looking at him. Louis rolled his own smile into his
mouth and tried to press it out; to keep his amusement at bay.

“Oh, I was just hanging out with Bertie the other day,” said Ritchie and Louis fought off an
eye twitch. Presumably Bertie was on the golf team because these guys had no reason to try
and trip him up.

“Were you?” He worked his jaw, but couldn’t think of anything to add.

Across the room someone called his name and he looked over to see Garrett, an actual
member of the golf team, and he cursed himself again. Louis waved and prayed he didn’t
come over.

“Nice group of guys,” Louis added in and then barreled ahead. “I just wanted to come over
and thank you again for the ride on Saturday.”

He paused and Harry’s ears pinked. Louis bit back a smirk and added, “From the game, I
mean.”

Harry cleared his throat and said, his voice just a bit off, “No worries, I never mind giving
someone a lift.”

Louis smirked, delighted. He thought of Harry’s hands on his arse, pulling him up against the
door, dragging him on his toes all across his house.

“Thing is, I think I left my keys in your car. Can you just take a look and text me if you find
them?”

He leaned over the table and scribbled his number on the notebook in front of Harry. When
he stood back up he grazed a hand down the back of Harry’s bicep and then watched his hand
twitch on the table.

“’Course,” Harry said, looking up at him.

Louis smiled back, his teeth digging into his lip. “Thanks again. Such a pleasure to meet
you.”
Harry nodded back to him and Louis waved to his friends while he walked away from the
table. His heart was racing from the whole interaction - from nearly getting caught in a lie to
the way Harry had grinned back at him.

It was a risk that Harry hadn’t felt the same way as him, like he hadn’t felt that unbearable
connection between them too. It could have been entirely one sided, which would have made
his friends’ concern much more valid, but he had sensed it between them. Like two people
snapping together that fit in all the right ways. He hoped he was right, hoped the look on
Harry’s face tonight said he felt it too. That he was relieved Louis had found him again.

It was Friday afternoon when he heard from Harry. He’d been in the Law Library studying
for the last couple of hours, spread out on his own over a six person table with all of his
things. He was starting to get desperate for his study cubicle, at the very least so he didn’t
need to be near his classmates anymore. They were almost unbearable.

The only one he liked was Liam. He’d been there earlier with Louis, but he’d left an hour
before to go to a mixer for his Contracts class. Louis didn’t have that until next semester,
thankfully. Not that he hadn’t been bombarded with enough social events for his own classes.

Unknown Number

Unknown Number: I found your keys

Unknown Number: Did you want me to drop
them by your house?
Louis: still at the law school if you
want to swing by? in Holland
Unknown Number: I can be there in 5

Louis sat back at the table with a satisfied smile on his face. There was something so sweet
about a plan working out the way you wanted it to. He still had a couple hours of studying to
do, but he could always finish up at home later that night.

He started to pack up the table, piling everything together. His glasses kept slipping down his
face as he moved around the table and he was pushing them up with a huff of annoyance. Just
as he was shoving his highlighters and pens into a small pouch, he caught movement at the
door.

Harry was standing in the vestibule looking around the room unsure. He had on a white t-
shirt with tan shorts and a pair of sunglasses pushed back into curls. Louis smiled at the
focused look on his face as he scanned the room. When he caught sight of Louis it showed all
over his face - he relaxed, visibly, his body line loosening, a smile rising on his face.
A few people looked up as he picked his way through the scattered tables towards Louis, but
they all turned back to their work quickly.

“Hey,” Harry said as he stepped up to Louis. “I’ve never been in here before.”

“I wouldn’t have guessed you had,” Louis said, smiling at him easily. “Unless you’re
moonlighting as a law student. Or just feel really passionate about case books.”

“That’s actually exclusively what I read.” Harry licked his bottom lip. “Only thing that gets
me going.”

Louis nodded, fighting back a laugh. “That makes total sense.”

Harry laughed lowly, his face dipping down to his shoes. They were silent for a moment, just
taking in each other’s presence. It felt so good to be back in front of him, to be in his gaze
again. There was something about it that had Louis’ shoulders pulling straighter, his hips
flattening, his whole body opening up for the attention. It was a delicious sort of feeling.

“Oh,” Harry said, digging around in his pocket. He pulled out the single key on a little gold
hoop with a gator charm attached and held it out to him. “Here you go.”

“Thanks.” Louis took it from him, their fingers brushing. With little shame in his voice he
said, “So clumsy of me to leave it behind.”

Harry cocked his head to the side and looked like he was slotting something together. Before
he could ask, Louis spoke again.

“Want to see what it’s for?”

Harry nodded. “Sure.”

Louis picked his things up off the table and walked with his hands full to the back of the
building. A couple of turns down corridors had him in the long hallway full of study cubicles.
It was silent, as always, nearly impossible to figure out if anyone else was in their rooms.

He peaked over his shoulder at Harry as he walked and watched him look around the space
with curiosity. Harry had pulled the sunglasses out of his hand and was just tucking them into
his pocket when Louis reached the door. Louis shuffled his stack of work to one arm before
pulling out the key.

“Do you have your own special room?”

Louis pursed his lips in a smile. “I call it a cell.”

He twisted the key in the lock and pulled the door out. Inside was just as he’d left it last
Saturday afternoon - the desk full of papers stacked haphazardly, pens and highlighters
scattered on the top and a stained mug with just the dregs of a Yorkshire tea in the bottom.
His chair was spun away from the desk and a pair of trainers were kicked to the far side.

Harry peaked his head in and then smirked. “Yeah, no mistaking it’s yours.”
“Hah,” Louis replied, sarcastically. But heat thrummed through him. The familiarity between
them, the jokes they already had, the way Harry felt he knew him already - he loved it.

“Are you still studying?”

Louis stepped into the room and dropped his things heavily onto the desk, tossing his glasses
down on top of it all. “I have more to do, but thought I might do it from home.”

He looked over to Harry, who was standing just on the threshold of the room with a grin on
his face. Louis smiled down at his work, alight with Harry’s gaze on him. He shuffled a few
of his papers, trading some out with the ones on his desk - finally getting his Torts notes from
the week before.

When Louis turned back around, he nearly bumped into him. Without someone holding the
door, it closed softly behind them. It was silent for a moment, their bodies nearly flush
together. Louis flicked his gaze up, just slightly, just enough to get his eyes off Harry’s lips.

He was going to open his mouth and say something dumb, something to cut the current
between them. As soon as he could think of anything beyond the thick tension they were
sinking into. But before he could, Harry licked his lips and then pulled Louis in by a hand
curled under his jaw.

It got heated immediately. Harry had him tight against his body, one hand around his jaw and
the other curved around his waist. Louis, in turn gripped his shoulder and hip, his thumb
digging in just above the waistband of Harry’s shorts. Their mouths moved quickly, lips
pushing and pulling, contrasting the gentle brush of their tongues and the warmth of their
breath between them.

Louis had remembered it being good, but he hadn’t remembered it being this good.

He curled his fingers into Harry’s scalp, felt his hair slip and tangle in between his fingers
until he tugged. Harry groaned long and low against his mouth, pressing his hips close in a
tight grind.

Louis bit down on his lip, smiling against it as he pulled. When it popped out of his lips he
hovered just an inch away from Harry’s mouth.

“There’s no sound proofing in these things.”

Harry kissed under his jaw, sucking lightly at the skin there. Louis tightened his grip in his
hair reflexively to the arousal coursing through him. His fingers slipped up under Harry’s
shirt to scrape along his abdomen and Harry’s teeth scraped along his throat.

A silent moan fell from his lips, his mouth parting around it as he did his best to choke it
back.

Maybe it was fine if the noise traveled. Maybe no one else was back there. Maybe the whole
law school could hear Harry make him come and he wouldn’t be bothered at all.
He pushed forward against Harry, their hips just about lining up in a hurried grind. Harry
went lax in his arms, like that sweet pressure was all he’d need. The tongue on his neck
turned languid and a slow heat built up under his skin.

On the next roll of Louis’ hips, their hard cocks brushing each other through their shorts.
Harry leaned back, just slightly, so he was against the wall of the study room. He kept his
arms locked around Louis, pulling him up his chest onto his toes so he was taller than Harry,
and bit softly at his neck.

Louis sighed, his head buzzing with how turned on he was.

He pressed his hand flat against Harry’s stomach, feeling his muscles contract under his
touch as his hips jumped forward. Louis smiled up to the ceiling, his eyes fluttering with
pleasure as Harry continued to work his neck.

Harry leaned back farther and the entire wall lurched with the weight of them.

His lips detached from Louis’ skin with a yelp and Louis tugged him back, both of them
tumbling into the desk. The wall creaked as it settled back in place and somewhere down the
row of cubicles someone yelled, “What the fuck!”

Louis covered his mouth with his hand to block the laughter he could already feel bubbling.

Harry dropped his head to Louis’s shoulder, shaking with it.

“Sorry!” Harry said, pitching his voice slightly deeper, the traces of laughter curling at the
edges of the word. His hand slipped up the back of Louis’ t-shirt and was a warm weight
against his skin.

Louis ran his hand down Harry’s bicep to curl against his elbow. It felt so good between
them, so right. “Take me home.”

Harry’s face turned on his shoulder and Louis bent his neck to look at him. He still had a
stupid, happy grin on his face and Louis couldn’t help reciprocating it. “I have practice
tonight.”

Louis pushed the curls back on his face. “Alright.”

“But it’s not till six.”

Louis kissed his temple. Quietly he said, “I could make you dinner.”

Harry’s lips twitched.

“Or I can walk home, if you have places to be.”

“It started raining right as I got here,” Harry said. He picked his head up off Louis’ shoulder,
but kept a hand on his body. “I wouldn’t make you walk home in the rain.”

Louis pressed his lips together to hold in his smile. “Well, good.”
He stared at Harry for another beat, almost unwilling to look away, before he turned back to
his desk and started packing things away in his bag. It was only a few short minutes before he
was ready to go. Harry had spent that time recounting a story from his afternoon class.

Harry popped his head out the door of his study space and looked back and forth comically,
as if making sure the coast was clear. Then he pushed it all the way open and looked back at
Louis with a goofy grin on his face.

“You’re such a loser,” he said fondly.

They walked side by side out of the building. The tables at the front where he’d been sitting
earlier had mostly cleared out and he only got one glare (that turned inquisitive at the sight of
Harry) as he walked by. Harry, bless him, remained oblivious to the look.

When they got outside he saw Harry wasn’t joking about the rain. It was a classic Florida
thunderstorm - rain so dense you couldn’t see through it. It was still so hot and humid outside
that thick waves of steam were rising off the pavement.

“Run for it?” Harry asked.

Louis nodded and they both took off from under the overhang. There was no point in
blocking his face, covering his eyes, avoiding puddles. It was a mess out there and the only
way out was through. He spotted Harry’s car in the distance and sprinted towards it. The
lights flashed and they both fell inside, slamming the doors closed.

He sat back in the seat, his chest heaving under his completely soaked shirt. Harry looked the
same, his hair plastered to his forehead and his white shirt had gone completely translucent
from the rain. The sight had Louis laughing, uncontrollably, surprisingly. Loud, waist
bending, mouth straining laughter.

It shook all the way through him and past his own gasps and giggles he could hear Harry in
the same state. Water dripped cold and shocking down his spine and he shook with it while
his cheeks ached from how broadly he was smiling.

It was minutes before he calmed down, pressing a hand to the center of his chest to feel his
heartbeat and the rapid rise and fall as he gasped for air.

Harry had his hands pressed to his cheeks, like he was trying to squeeze the laughter out or
hold it in, Louis wasn’t sure. But it had the cutest effect.

“Are we cursed to be in your car soaking wet?” Louis asked, his voice still light and laced
with the giggles.

“I’ll get you your own towel,” Harry offered, biting the side of his lip and scrunching his
nose.

Louis let out another huff of laughter. He could still feel it all bubbling in his chest, just that
overwhelming joy, and shook his head to try and clear it out. “Just drive.”
Harry smirked and started the car. A blast of cold air had him shivering in his seat and it was
so reminiscent of Saturday night.

They chatted lightly as they drove to his house. Harry’s wipers were working overtime with
the storm and Louis watched the streets roll by in a drippy smudge. Harry’s hand was on the
gear shift, holding it lightly, and Louis kept glancing at it, holding himself back from
reaching out and lacing their fingers together. His head felt almost jumbled, almost as blurry
as the world outside the window, when it came to Harry.

Mina’s car was missing when Harry pulled into the left side of the driveway, fat raindrops
smudging the blue of the house into a messy blob. Just as he put the car in park, there was a
loud rumble of thunder and then lightning streaking the sky.

“Should we run for it again?”

Harry was quiet and Louis looked over to him. He was staring intently back at Louis, his lips
bitten red and his eyes dark on him. Louis licked his lips reflexively, feeling a spark of
arousal flash through him. Where Harry’s t-shirt was plastered to his chest from the rain, his
nipples were hard and poking through. He wanted to reach over and touch them, pull on
them, wrap his mouth around them.

On instinct, they met over the center console.

Harry’s hand found its place around his jaw again, drawing Louis’ face close and then biting
into his mouth. It was so good, so fast. Their tongues and teeth worked together and Louis
gripped onto Harry’s arm as if he could barely root himself to the spot. He twisted his leg
underneath himself to rise part way on the seat to get closer, get a better angle.

Harry pulled away from him with a ragged breath and pushed his seat all the way back,
tugging at Louis’ waist with his other hand. Louis scrambled over the center console,
knocking his knee on the steering wheel and then his ankle on the cup holder before
straddling Harry in the driver’s seat.

He pulled him in with both hands on his face. The space was humid between them, their wet
clothes dragging and sticking together. It should have been uncomfortable. The restriction
was delicious. When his hand ran down Harry’s chest, Harry shivered from the touch. His
hands were on Louis’ thighs, rucking up his shorts best he could, petting at the skin he
exposed. It felt so good, so heady between them.

Louis was rocking in Harry’s lap within minutes. Harry’s cock was a hard line underneath
him and each brush over him had pleasure sizzling through him. His fingers tweaked over
Harry’s nipple and he hissed into Louis’ mouth. Louis smiled around the sound, Harry’s
bottom lip dragging out between his teeth as he grinned. Under the fingers pressed against
Harry’s throat, he felt his pulse rise with every bite of his teeth.

Outside the rain was pounding on the front windshield and there was a steady, rhythmic noise
on the roof. Harry pulled back from him, breathing heavily in the space between them and
when Louis opened his eyes there was another flash of lightning outside.
With his eyes on Harry, and lust crashing through his body, he continued to rock on his lap. It
was a delicious pressure underneath him and his own cock was hard in his shorts, straining in
the wet khaki. He was partly through sorting how to get both their clothes off without having
to move when Harry started unbuttoning Louis’ shorts.

“Wanna get you off,” he said, his words slow, nearly slurring with arousal. Louis nodded,
kissing him again.

Harry tugged the zipper down and his hands ran inside his shorts, trailing sparks through his
abdomen, down his legs and sizzling up his spine. His shorts were pushed down as far as
possible and then he tugged at the waistband of Louis’ underwear, his fingertips just brushing
through Louis’ pubic hair.

He moaned hotly in Harry’s mouth, then licked into it. His hips were still shifting, still slowly
rocking over Harry’s cock. Harry pushed his t-shirt up and the wet fabric stuck to each other
above his belly button.

Louis’ cock was pulled out of his underwear, Harry’s hand hot around him, drawing a huff of
a groan out of Louis. He pulled back from Harry’s lips to look down at their bodies.

His legs were spread wide around Harry’s thighs, everything pulled down and pushed up, his
midsection on display. Harry was looking at him hungrily as he slowly stroked over Louis’
cock. It was so overwhelming to be under his attention that way, to have Harry’s hands on his
body, his body under his. Louis couldn’t take it alone.

He pushed back slightly, Harry tugging at his cock roughly as he moved and a blurt of
precome beaded at the slit. Harry rubbed at it and then licked it off his thumb. Louis
swallowed hard, watching Harry’s tongue suck it off, and wished there was enough space for
him to fall to his knees.

Instead, he made enough room to unbutton Harry’s shorts and tug his cock out in one
movement. Harry’s head fell back against the headrest with a lazy, pleased look on his face.

“You have really nice hands,” Harry said as Louis started to stroke him.

He shuffled forward on his knees as far as he could to still work his hand and bit at Harry’s
neck. “Thanks, love. So do you.”

Flexing his hips forward, he bumped his cock into Harry’s stomach as a reminder, and Harry
laughed under his tongue. Harry took him back in hand and they stroked each other in time.
Louis kissed back up to his lips.

It felt so good, so intimate, to be pulling each other off in the center of a storm. All of that
raging outside, but in the car it was just the quiet sounds of their mouths and their hands and
the breaths that passed between them. Harry was working him over so slowly, he’d dare to
call it lazy if each stroke didn’t have him teetering just on the edge. There was so much
strength in his fingers, in his wrist, that each languid tug counted more.
Louis’ head was getting light with arousal and he started to wank Harry faster. He was
huffing breathy moans into Louis’ mouth, passing it between them like they were
shotgunning pleasure.

He pulled back on a drag so slow he thought every inch of ecstasy was going to be burned
into his memory forever. His mouth hovered just off from Harry’s, slick with spit and
breathing heavily. The heat between them and the hand on his cock had his eyelids fluttering.

Outside, the lightning was still flashing - twice in a row, bright enough to see the droplets still
pooling in Harry’s collarbone glow. He sucked at the water and when the thunder rolled a
second later he spilled into Harry’s hand.

Louis’ forehead dropped to Harry’s shoulder, watching his come drip on Harry’s fingers and
kept tugging, albeit much slower, at Harry’s cock.

“Feel so good, baby,” Louis said, rubbing his thumb under the head and then right down the
vein underneath.

Harry choked off a whine, his hips shifting under Louis’ body as he tried to thrust into his
grip. Louis sucked at his throat, lightly so as to not leave any marks, and started rolling his
hips again against Harry’s, just for the simulation, the visual. Harry’s hand came to curve
around his waist and press on his arse, helping him along on the movement. His softening
cock was bouncing lightly and he hissed when it bumped into his hand on Harry’s cock.

But Harry let out a drawn out moan and then came over his fist. His head was thrown back
against the headrest, gorgeous in the flashing lights outside as his chest heaved, nipples two
sharp points under the damp fabric.

They came down together, both their breathing slowing with come drying on their hands. He
kissed Harry lightly on the cheek and then on his temple, feeling him begin to smile against
his lips.

From the center console, Harry pulled out a couple napkins and they both wiped off their
hands.

“Can I still make you dinner?” Louis’ voice was a bit rough from pleasure, but he could tell
Harry liked the sound of it, his cheeks still pink as Louis looked at him. “Could even lend
you something dry to wear.”

Harry’s face was caught in a grin, his eyes still soft and sparkly from orgasm, like his head
was still lost in pleasure.

“Sure, if you want to.” Harry took both the soiled napkins and threw them into the back.

“Now look who the messy one is,” Louis teased with an eyebrow raise.

“Guess you’ve been rubbing off on me,” Harry said and then immediately burst into laughter.
Louis let out a long groan and tried to bite back his smile.

“You’re such a loser.”

Harry kept giggling, his laughter jostling Louis in his lap, the rain a delightful background to
it - almost like a white noise machine. Like if he could, he’d bottle it up and have it sing him
to sleep.

“A loser you wanna cook dinner for.” Harry’s laughter died out, but the smile remained.

He could have teased him back, taken it back, but instead, he said, “Yeah, I really do.”

Harry stayed smiling at him, like it didn’t phase him at all. Like maybe boys were always
trying to cook for him and if that were true, Louis wouldn’t even mind. He felt so good at that
moment, still sitting in Harry’s lap and in a post-orgasm haze, that it didn’t matter.

“Let’s go then,” he said easily.

Louis’ tongue pressed into his cheek, overwhelmed with how enamored he was, so soon,
already, with Harry.

After tucking themselves back into their damp clothing, Louis pushed the driver's side door
open and grabbed his bag from the passenger seat. Once they'd tumbled out of the car, they
jogged to the front door, shoes making wet smacks against the pavement. At least the rain had
slowed to a drizzle.

They kicked off their shoes just inside the entrance and then peeled their soaked socks off.
The air con was cool against their damp skin and Louis shivered as they moved towards his
bedroom.

Louis pulled clothes from his drawers and when he turned around Harry was just shucking
down his underwear, the rest of his clothes already in a wet pile on the floor.

They’d only just come, but Harry’s bare body in front of him, damp and nearly glowing in
the poor lighting, could get him interested real quick. The sight had Louis licking his lips.

“How long until you need to go again?” he asked with his eyes on Harry’s soft cock. It rested
against his thighs, framed by Harry’s hands low on his hips.

Harry laughed, his abdomen and cock jumping with the sound. “It’s already five.”

Louis scrunched his nose, remembering practice was at six.

In the kitchen he opened the pantry and looked at his half of the shelves, then back at Harry.
The gym shorts he'd given him came up quite high on his thigh and the UF Law t-shirt that
he’d gotten at orientation stretched across his back.

“Anything in particular?”

Harry leaned against the counter. “I don’t eat too much before practice. Some kind of carb
would work.”

Louis pulled a box of pasta out with a raised eyebrow and Harry nodded. “Do you want
chicken with it?’
“Sure, if you’ve got it.”

Louis grabbed the chicken from the fridge, as well as the butter.

“Have you always enjoyed cooking?” Harry asked, hovering next to him, as Louis put a pot
of water on the stove to heat up.

Louis snorted. “I actually hate cooking.

“Do you?” Harry seemed surprised. “You’re always trying to cook for me.”

Louis chewed his lip for a moment as he seasoned the chicken breasts.

“I used to cook a lot for my sisters growing up. My parents were always working, so usually I
ended up making their meals. I learned to cook when I was really young and it was really bad
for a long time, but once I got good then nobody else ever wanted to cook. Annoying thing,
that.” He tried to keep his tone light, leaving out pretty much the entire meat of the story. But
also he didn’t know how to say that cooking was the main way he knew how to care for
someone. He wasn’t always good with words, but a bowl of pasta expressed almost anything.

“How many sisters do you have?”

“I had four, but my mum had another set of twins two years ago. I finally got my first brother,
but now I’m the oldest of seven.”

Harry whistled. “That’s a lot. I just have an older sister, Gemma.”

Louis put oil in the frying pan and then added the chicken. It sizzled immediately, the
seasoning turning aromatic. “You’re definitely the baby.”

Harry’s mouth dropped into a pout. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Louis grinned at him. “Don’t worry about it, baby.”

Harry rolled his eyes, a smile spreading on his face again. Louis added the pasta to the
boiling water. While everything cooked they chatted about the week they’d just had, about
swimming, and their friends.

They talked all through the chicken finishing, through Louis making a butter sauce and
through him plating it all together. When he handed it to Harry he almost looked surprised by
the dish in front of him. It wasn’t fancy by any means, but maybe it hadn’t been what he
expected.

“You made that look much easier than this should have been.”

“S’not too hard. I could show you sometime.”

Harry nodded and then Louis jerked his head towards the living room and said, “lets sit on
the couch.”
They settled in on opposite ends and Louis tucked a leg up underneath him.

Harry took his first bite and, with his mouth still full, said, “This is really good.”

“I’m glad you like it.” A little bubble of something rose in his chest. Delight, pride, hope…
he wasn’t sure.

They ate quickly, both mindful of the clock.

When most of his food was gone, Harry scratched the back of neck and looked up at Louis
with an odd expression on his face. Louis raised an eyebrow and waited for him to speak.

“So,” he started, which was never good. “I wanted to, like, I don’t know… mention
something I guess.”

“Alright?”

Harry shuffled on the couch. “I like you, you know? I do, but I don’t really have time for…
this, I guess.”

“This?” Louis said shortly, cocking his head to the side.

“Like dating or anything like that.”

“Alright,” Louis said, as agreeably as possible. “I don’t have time for that either. But this-” he
waved a hand between them, “Works okay, don’t you think?”

Harry’s mouth parted and Louis took a bite as he seemed to process what Louis was offering.

“Like friends with benefits?”

“Sure.” Louis shrugged. “I’d like to be your friend. I like the benefits too.”

Harry huffed out a low laugh. “I just didn’t want you to think it could be anything more. With
swimming this year… I just barely have enough time to think.”

“I’m not trying to pressure you or make you feel overwhelmed or anything like that. I’m so
busy with my first year, it’s the same for me. No brain space for anything else.”

Harry nodded. “Yeah, exactly.”

“But-” Louis continued, licking over his bottom lip and tasting the butter from the sauce.
“Could be nice to have someone to turn my mind off with.”

Harry smiled back at him.

“Yeah, yeah. Could be.” Harry took the last bite of his food and when he was done chewing
he continued speaking. “Do you think we could…”

Harry trailed off and Louis held his breath while he waited for him to finish. It looked like he
was working something out in his head, the wrinkle between his eyebrow a deep slash
through the center of his face.

Finally, he said, “Would you mind if we keep it just between us? I’m not exactly... out.”

“Yeah, ‘course,” Louis said, giving him a soft smile. “To anyone?”

“I told my parents I was bi when I was like thirteen or something.” He ran a hand through his
hair again. It had started to dry in messy waves. “But I never really dated - in general, not just
guys - so half the time I think they forgot entirely.”

“Not really something you forget,” Louis said, trying to make his voice light. “Did they take
it okay at the time?”

“Yeah.” Harry sat back against the couch, slouching a bit. “They didn’t care too much.
Gemma either.”

“That’s good at least.”

Harry nodded. “Does your family know?”

Louis laughed shortly. “Yeah. I was so dumb when I came out to my mum. Remember how I
said they worked all the time? I was like, withholding it from her, I think, kind of like
punishing her for not being around. I don’t really know, but, like you, I never dated much.
When I got my first boyfriend in uni I came out to her just by introducing him.”

Harry snorted. “Did you really? Weren’t you afraid of what she’d say?”

“Yeah, it was so stupid. I was just on FaceTime like, “this is my boyfriend Erich!” and my
mum had to flounder through it.” He ran a hand over his face and shook his head. He’d only
dated Erich for a couple of disaster months. His mum had been annoyed with him for the way
he told her longer than the relationship even lasted. “She was fine in the end. I think with
seven kids you don’t have time to be arsed about that sort of thing - or at least she didn’t. And
I was a whole continent away, so it made telling her feel… I don’t know. Easier? Safer?”

Harry nodded, like he understood what Louis was doing a poor job of explaining.

“Yeah, yeah for sure.” Harry paused, and Louis waited for him to keep talking. When Harry
stayed quiet, he broke the silence.

“Is swimming accepting, as a sport?”

Harry shrugged. “Some of it is where you go, some of it depends on how seriously you take
it. There’s not a ton of out swimmers. That I know of at least. So, I’m just really unsure about
the team knowing.”

Louis scrunched his nose at the words. It was a different conversation altogether than one he
was used to. That the homophobia you experienced went beyond your family, your friends,
school, work. That it could be experienced on not just a national, but an international level.
But that was something Harry had to worry about when he dreamed of swimming in these
bigger meets. He could be courting opinions on his sexuality from around the globe.
“That has to be really hard.”

“I try not to think about it,” Harry said easily, though surely it wasn’t easy. “I have to get
going in a few.”

“Alright,” Louis said, moving to the kitchen. As he put both of their bowls in the sink, Harry
crowded behind him and pressed a kiss to his neck.

“I think this is gonna work.” Harry pushed his hands under Louis’ shirt to just rest on the skin
of his stomach. His touch was a pleasant warmth and Louis leaned back into his chest.

“You should come back after practice.”

Harry hummed. “I’m going to be dead tired and I have an early swim in the morning. At
6:30.”

“Okay,” Louis said. “You slept pretty well here last time.”

“You wouldn’t mind?”

Louis shook his head. “Sounds kinda nice.”

Harry kissed his neck again and then pressed his face to the skin of it, breathing him in.
“Okay. We have a team thing afterwards, but I’ll text you? Sure you don’t have plans?”

“Just me and my textbooks for a hot night in.”

He felt Harry smile against him, the fluttering of the muscles in his cheek and then the press
of his teeth. Louis closed his eyes to the weight of him - delicious in all the ways they
surrounded each other.

In a few minutes Harry would leave for practice, but he’d be right back. And that was all that
mattered. They could be friends with benefits, any sort of situationship, dating, married for
Christ’s sake and it wouldn’t matter. It was all the same scenario rolling over itself again and
again. They fit. It felt right and Louis would say anything, do anything, right now to keep it
that way.

Harry came back hours later. Louis had been so deeply focused studying on his bed, that
when Harry texted he was on his way Louis couldn’t believe how much time had passed. On
his way back to his room from unlocking the door, he grabbed an apple from the fridge,
texting Harry that the door was open.

Louis had been in the middle of reviewing his Con Law notes and as he took the first bite of
his apple he was still reviewing those in his head. To avoid getting lost in the section, he kept
running through the same part over and over again.

Before he was even fully back in his bed, climbing into the circle he’d left in the middle of
his bed, his eyes were already snapping to where he’d left off on the page. His glasses were
sitting low on the bridge of his nose and his books were fanned carefully out around him so
he could look at everything at once.

He ate the apple slowly, almost forgetting it was even in his hand or that there was a bite half-
chewed in his mouth, until he went to turn a page with that hand or a drop of juice drifted
down his thumb.

Still chewing, he pushed the finished core onto his bedside table, already smiling in
anticipation. The door to his room opened just as he was licking the last of the juice off his
thumb.

“Hey, Lou,” Harry said. Louis felt his heart jump at the nickname. It was the first time Harry
had used it, he was almost certain.

Harry looked more or less the same as he had when he’d left. Except, his hair was still a bit
damp from the pool. But he’d put back on the clothes he’d left in; Louis’ law school shirt still
stretched across his shoulders and too short shorts high on his thighs. The backpack was
dropped from Harry’s shoulder to the floor, followed by Harry’s trainers being kicked off.

“Hi, H. How was practice?” The nickname slipped off his own tongue, almost like a perfect
mirror, a little reaction to Harry’s slip. Harry smiled down at his feet while he lined his shoes
up.

“Not bad, but Friday night is always exhausting.” He tripped across the room and Louis
moved the notes on the left side of the bed so Harry could crash onto it.

He flopped onto his back with his head under his arm. This close, Louis could smell the
chlorine sticking to his skin and something herbal underneath it. It was almost nice, like
that’s how he was meant to smell. It fit Harry.

Louis looked down at him, the way his curls flopped on Louis’ pillowcase and the way his
shirt rose just slightly up his stomach as he stretched. He wanted to pet it, kiss it. Instead he
turned back to his notes.

“Is it because it’s a long week or?”

“Yeah, that, and because it’s just the distance team we’re really adding in those extra meters.
It’s a lot of kick. Like a lot. My legs feel like jelly.”

“Poor baby,” Louis said, a juxtaposition to the condescending words, making Harry smile.
“Did you need anything?”

“No,” Harry said and then yawned loudly. “We go for a meal afterwards. Kind of a team
dinner of sorts. It’s really nice actually. It’s not a ton of us who swim distances so it’s good to
reconnect with each other.”

Louis nodded, shuffling in his stack of papers for notes from Tuesday’s class. While reading
them over he asked, “Were the guys I met - do they swim distance?”
He’d never thought much about swimming and he couldn’t claim to care about it, but he liked
how much passion Harry had when he talked about it. His voice was soothing, the way Harry
spoke made it easy to listen to him and read his notes at the same time.

“No, actually. Mike is my roommate. He swims mid with Franz, and Ritchie is a sprinter.”

Louis nodded like he knew what all that meant and then highlighted a section of his notes he
was sure he was going to need next week in class. Afterwards, he started typing them into his
study guide on his laptop. He could feel Harry looking at him curiously.

“You know,” Harry started, turning onto his side to face Louis. His knee knocked one of his
notebooks to the side, but neither of them corrected it. “I’ve been trying to figure out how
you got someone from the actual golf team to back you up? Genius by the way.”

Louis snorted. “I didn’t. Garrett thinks I’m on the track team. Just a lowly walk-on, which is
why he’d never heard of me. I told him I was a sprinter and he didn’t ask any more
questions.”

“Oh yeah?” Delight was clear in Harry’s voice. “And can you actually run?”

“I could beat you any day on the track,” Louis said, turning away from his notes to smirk at
him.

“I’m going to take you up on that one day.”

“Name the time and place, baby.”

Harry laughed, pressed his face into his upper arm for a moment. “And can you golf?”

Louis snorted. “Do I look like I know how to golf?”

“What would looking like you know how to golf actually look like?”

He finished typing his notes and closed his laptop. Louis rolled his neck and then looked at
Harry with a grin on his face.

“I don’t know… like I fuck old men for money?”

Harry’s mouth fell open and then he let out a loud laugh. Louis smiled at him delightedly and
then continued speaking.

“Listen, the only twenty-somethings I know who can golf are either rich or fucking someone
rich. And I’m neither.” Harry was still laughing at his words and Louis let him do it for a
moment before finally giving the punchline. Dryly, he added, “Oh wait. You drive a Range
Rover. Fuck, I’m going need to get some clubs.”

Harry pressed both his palms to his face and continued laughing and Louis felt so pleased
with himself, he tucked his chin as he smiled down at Harry. By the time Harry’s laughter
died, Louis had packed up his stuff and moved it to the desk, only tripping over something on
the floor once.
“If I’m gonna be over here more, I might end up cleaning the place up.”

Louis let out an exaggerated moan. “I think that got me hard.”

He climbed back onto the bed, kneeing his way towards Harry, who was smiling so deeply
his eyes were only slits on his face.

The pillow was cool under his cheek when he laid down next to him. They’d just agreed that
afternoon that the thing between them was sex, but he’d be okay with them just laying here
like this. Like two question marks curving together, asking who could they be for each other?

Harry leaned forward and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips. Too gentle, maybe, for half a day
into a situationship. But Louis didn’t mind, it was nice.

When they pulled apart, he asked, “what time do you have to get up tomorrow?”

Harry hummed and kissed him quickly once more. “Probably around 5:30.”

“Yikes,” Louis mumbled against his lips.

Harry nodded, reattaching his lips and moving forward on the bed to press their bodies
together. They kissed languidly for minutes more. His hand laid on Harry’s chest, feeling the
gentle rise and fall from his breathing and the patter of his heartbeat underneath. Harry’s arm
was on his hip, fingertips dancing just under the edge of his shirt.

Louis pulled back and then gave his lips a light peck.

“Did you want me to make you breakfast?”

Harry shook his head. “It’s too early. I’ll grab a bagel on the way.”

Louis nudged himself impossibly closer, his legs slipping between Harry’s against the cool
sheets.

“If you’re sure?”

Harry nodded and then tucked his chin as he yawned widely. Louis smiled at him and then
twisted to turn off the light. It had only been one week, but he was finding himself exactly
where he wanted to be.

“I’m going to get another drink, do you want one?” Louis asked Liam.

“Nah, man. I think I’m good.” Liam tipped his glass to show it was mostly full.

Louis nodded and then gave a closed lip smile to the girls before moving towards the bar.
They were downtown at a mixer, the third one he’d had to go to that week. A couple girls
from their Crim Law class were standing with them, mostly talking to Liam, but Louis wasn’t
bothered. Nobody really knew what to make of him and the longer he held out on giving
them a piece of himself the worse it was going to get.

But he couldn’t be arsed to care.

It was officially one month down of law school and he was exhausted. The fact that there
seemed to be one of these get-togethers every night wasn’t helping and they always seemed
to last forever. He hadn’t slept a full night since before school had started and likely wouldn’t
again until winter hols.

Events like this were weird because it was half schmoozing and half getting black out drunk
with people who look at you like competition.

Maybe it didn’t have to be that way and maybe Louis didn’t have to think that way - but
that’s how it’s always been. School was something to win. He might not have money or
connections, but if he tried the hardest, worked the hardest, he could overcome those
adversities. Maybe, if he was lucky. And if he wasn’t? He didn’t want to be friends with the
people who could anyway.

His first boyfriend called him ruthless. Louis was sure it was meant as an insult, but he took it
on the chin and now wore the label with pride.

He had a high expectation for himself and what he could achieve. He wasn’t letting anything
stand in his way, not even himself.

If that meant he was out three times a week socializing for connections and then up until
three studying, then so be it. If it meant he sacrificed nights and weekends, then who gave a
shit?

He pushed his still nearly full beer bottle onto the bar. Getting a new one had just been an
excuse to leave the conversation.

A buzzing in his pocket had Louis pulling out his phone to see he’d received a new text.

Harry

Harry: Are you still at your thing

Louis: for another hour at least
Harry: 😔

Harry was his one concession. The one thing he was trying to take in stride, but even that he
was already mentally about a hundred steps ahead of where they stood.

The problem was he really liked him. From the very first moment they met he was
determined to keep knowing him. He’d thought maybe the attraction would burn out in time
or the more time they spent together the less he’d like him. But with each bit he learned about
Harry, the less he could see that happening. Harry was just interesting. There was a lightness
to him that felt fresh to Louis, like being around him was relaxing.

Plus, he’d never been into athletes before, but there was something in the dedication Harry
had to swimming that he found really hot, actually. The way he spoke of strategy, of racing,
of training - it resonated with him. They were so different on paper, but they thought about
things in nearly the same way.

Louis took a sip of his beer, gone warm from the palm of his hand, and wondered if he could
slip out of the party and into Harry’s bed.

“Did you need anything?” the bartender asked.

Louis shook his head. “Just taking a break.”

The bartender snorted and looked over his shoulder. Louis had a clear idea of what was
happening without looking. The most annoying men imaginable were standing in ill-fitting
suits, boasting about something no one cared about, while the girls stood in sharp heels and
tight cocktail dresses absolutely ready to pounce on the conversation. Or vice versa. It was
always one or the other.

But they all looked like kids trying to dress up as lawyers. Sure, the clothes were right, but
they all felt wrong somehow.

“A bit wild in here whenever we get the law students in.”

Louis took another sip of his beer. “Remember that if you ever need a lawyer. They were
once a wasted twenty-something yelling about due process in your bar at ten pm on a
Thursday.”

The man laughed and Louis tossed him a smile before grabbing his beer again.

“See you around.” Louis moved across the room towards Liam.

Only forty-five minutes more and he could walk the fifteen minute trek home, take a shower,
and see if Harry was still interested. Maybe he would be.

Louis was sitting on the living room floor with his notes spread on the coffee table and a half
finished essay waiting on his laptop. He had the remote for the TV in his hand and was trying
to work out how to stream from his laptop to the TV without asking Mina.

There was something embarrassing about queuing up your situationship’s swim meet to
watch by yourself on the floor. Or at least there was something embarrassing about it to
Louis. Like it made him a little more transparent. Like someone would only have to look at
him jabbing at the buttons of the remote with a snack on top of his notes and steaming cup of
tea next to his knee and be like oh I see.

So, he fiddled with the remote and wiggled the touchpad on his laptop until the TV screen
flickered over to mirror his laptop.

“I’m a genius,” he announced to no one.

He opened up ESPN+ on the internet and pressed play on the meet. It didn’t start for another
five minutes and there was a blue screen that said ‘your program will begin shortly’ just
hovering there. Niall’s TV provider was still signed in on his laptop, thankfully. He’d been
scamming off his subscriptions since Freshman year and he wasn’t about to stop now.

Louis just hoped there wasn’t some kind of log somewhere, like a list of shame and right at
the top of his: College Swim Meets.

While he waited, he began working on his essay again. It was the last Friday in September,
somehow, impossibly, already. The essay was due the following week, but hopefully he could
finish the first draft as he watched the meet. Luckily, it wasn’t a home meet and the team was
down in Ft. Lauderdale or he’d have been trying to juggle all this on his knees to watch in
person.

Harry was only swimming in a couple of events. He’d mentioned it offhand a couple days
ago when they’d tumbled into his bed for a bit of fun and then laid there afterwards for ages
coming down.

“It’s just the start of the season,” Harry had said with his eyes directed towards the ceiling.
“But we want to come out strong, you know? We won SEC’s last year, but NCAA’s was
disappointing.”

Louis nodded, but wasn’t exactly sure what he meant. Harry had blown out a breath, the hair
on his forehead lifting with the exhale and tickling Louis’ chin when it bumped into him.

“They’ve got me on the 500m and 1000m, which is fine, but neither are my favorite.”

Louis rubbed his lips absentmindedly and thought about Harry’s lean body cutting through
the water for a thousand meters. What that might look like. How much power his body held
to do that.

He was going to find out soon.

The meet popped on and he looked up from his laptop to see the swimmers were already by
the pool. The camera was so far back he could barely tell one from another with their
matching suits and caps. Niall hadn’t been lying when he’d said the suits were small.

It was perfectly clear why Harry had asked him not to leave any marks - everybody would
see. There was no hiding that.

He was half listening out for Harry’s name as he worked. They started with relays and Louis
got a page of his essay written as they swam them. Halfway through another paragraph, his
phone started vibrating on the floor next to him with a call from his mum. He usually only
managed one weekly call with her, but with the meet on and the essay half-formed in his
mind he watched it ring out to voicemail instead of answering.

The meet moved on to another race Harry wasn’t in and his mum’s voicemail popped up.

Putting it on speaker, his fingers were already back on his keyboard before she started
speaking.

“Hi darling. I was just calling to check in. I know things are a bit busy over there, but that
doesn’t mean you should ignore your dear old mum.” She laughed a little sardonically and
Louis furrowed his brow at the computer screen. “Anywho, the kids are good, Dan is good.
We all miss you. Did you ever end up booking your tickets for Christmas hols?”

Louis typed faster.

“-give me a call back when you can. Love you.”

The line cut off and Louis let out a long sigh.

It wasn’t that he didn’t want to talk to her or that he didn’t like talking to her. He did, he does.
But it was easier to love them all from a distance. Sometimes that distance was physical, like
living across the Atlantic, and sometimes it was just not answering the phone every time she
called.

On the TV the announcer said, “In lane three we have Harry Styles from Florida. In lane
four…”

Louis’ head snapped up to catch Harry on screen in his little blue trunks adjusting his cap
down on his head. He had his goggles pulled on now and a focused look on his face. It was
almost hard to recognize him without his statement hair, his green eyes, those dimples in his
cheeks.

He looked serious as he bent over into the starting position.

The announcer finished going through all the names and the camera panned out to show the
whole pool before the intercom in the arena said, “Ready…” and then beeped loudly.

All the swimmers were off the block and Louis’ typing slowed and slowed until it stopped
completely.

Training his eyes on lane number three, he watched Harry cut through the water. It was the
shorter of his races and Louis felt like he didn’t blink for four minutes until Harry’s hand
sliced through the water and hit the wall for the last time.

He shook himself out of his stupor as Harry looked up at the time screen and then pulled off
his cap, revealing a second underneath, and his goggles. Harry had won the race, but Louis
didn’t know if there was a specific time he was looking for. What he did know was that Harry
had hit the wall first and he could see the pride in that at the corner of Harry’s lips where he
was fighting off a smile.
 Louis watched until he got out of the pool and then looked back to his essay, abandoned in
the middle of a sentence. The cursor was blinking as if waiting for him to come back to his
senses.

He glanced at the TV and wondered if he ever would.

Chapter End Notes

Sorry I couldn't help myself slipping an Escapade reference in there, it just fit too well
not too.
 October

“Louis, where are you? It looks like academic hell.” Oli’s face was small and pinched
together on the FaceTime call and Niall’s was pulled into a grimace next to him.

He’d forgotten entirely that they’d moved their call from Sunday to Wednesday due to a
family thing for Niall and had intended to spend all afternoon and evening locked in his
cubicle studying. When the call came through, he had hastily pushed in his Airpods in hopes
he wouldn’t disturb anyone else.

“Remember the ‘personal study space’ that we all laughed about in my offer? This is it.” He
kept his voice low and then switched the camera to give them the best view he could.

“Yeah, three half full mugs of tea and two inches thick of mess - definitely Lou’s space,”
Niall said. Louis turned the camera back and then flipped him off, sticking his tongue out for
added emphasis.

“Speaking of messy workspaces,” Oli segued. “How’s Zayn?”

Louis perked up in his chair and leaned his elbow on the table, propping his phone up against
his laptop. Niall rolled his eyes and heaved a heavy sigh.

“No change, except our boss keeps talking about a ‘corporate retreat’ and Jessica suggested-”

“Fucking hate Jessica,” Louis butted in to say. Oli raised an eyebrow and Louis shrugged, but
Niall pointed at him as if to say exactly.

“What did Jessica say?” Oli asked.

“That if we did a retreat we should all room with our desk mates because we’re practically
family.” Niall blinked at them, a frown deep in his face. “Family?! What kind of family
leaves a line of crumbs in a perfect circle around the mouse? What kind of family changes the
desktop background from the standard company blue and green to a photo of Batman’s abs?
Hm?”

“Which Batman?” Louis asked unhelpfully.

“Yeah there’s a difference between, like, Afleck and Clooney, for instance.”

“Not the point at all,” Niall nearly screeched. “Sometimes I hate you guys so much.”

“False,” Louis said. “You can survive a weekend retreat with Zayn. Distract yourself with
how pretty he is and then we can come up with ways to get back at him.”

Niall sighed heavily, slumping pathetically in his desk chair. “Someone else goes, I’m
depressed. Lou?”

“Yeah, Louis. How’s your pretty distraction doing?”

Louis rolled his eyes. “I don’t know Oli, how is the nightmare of your life?”

“Luke could choke on his own spit and I’d laugh over his dead body. You?”

“I’d happily choke on Harry’s spit every day of my life.”

Niall made a retching sound and Louis smiled at him serenely.

“You disgust me,” Oli said.

“I love you too, darling.”

“So it’s fine then?”

“Sure, Ni. It’s totally chill. We’re just friends who hook up.”

Oli and Niall had matching faces and not good ones.

“You’re going to fall in love with him,” Oli said in the most gentle way possible and Louis
rolled his eyes at the tone.

“Yeah, I am going to. No doubt about it.” He knew himself, he knew his heart. Maybe it was
because he didn’t have his first boyfriend until he was twenty or maybe it’s just something
hidden in his DNA, but when he falls, he falls hard. Last time he crashed and burned so
horrendously they still don’t speak his name.

Niall and Oli were both sending him pitying looks, but he didn’t mind. He kept reminding
himself not to get his heart broken, that it was never worth it, but his heart was already
hoping.

“It is what it is, guys.”

“Wish it was something else,” Niall grumbled.

“Maybe it will be,” Louis offered. “He’s a nice guy, just busy. But we’re all busy.”

Oli nodded and then they both seemed to decide together to let it go.

“I can hardly breathe around my coursework,” Oli said. “And we are hardly doing anything
yet and I’m still up half the night every single night.”

Louis agreed and the conversation went on around his hopelessness. His developing feelings
for Harry were the least stressful thing he had on that week.

+
By Monday he had made minimal headway. Liam was sitting with him at the big tables in the
library working on a study guide; they’d already been at it for hours. Honestly, he had no idea
what time it even was. It didn’t matter, he’d be there until it was done.

Their professor was powering through the Con Law syllabus so fast, with hundreds of pages
of reading each night, that it was hard to keep up. All his classes were moving at the same
blistering pace, so he was trying to read ahead, take detailed notes, and then re-write the notes
each day, to be sure it was sinking it. That had always been standard practice for him, but
only a month and a half into law school and it was becoming exhausting.

Liam had offered to split parts of the study guide with him and it was making the workload
easier. Most of their class grade was an open-book exam at the end of the semester, so the
study guide would be a lifesaver.

“Did you read the section on US v. Darby yet?” Liam asked. He had his pen poised over his
notebook, like breaking to speak was taking up precious time and he couldn’t even fully lift
his hand from the page to do it.

“No,” Louis said, squinting at the syllabus tacked to the front of his notebook. “I was
reviewing the section on Roosevelt. Why?”

“Just something interesting. I’ll make a note and we can discuss when you get there.” Liam
wrote something in chicken scratch and got back to the reading, mouthing the words as he
went. It had bothered Louis for the first couple weeks of their friendship, but at least he didn’t
read them aloud.

On the table his phone buzzed. Louis sighed, double checked where he was in the paragraph,
and slid open his phone.

Harry

Harry: Are you in the law library?

Louis: as always, whats up
Harry: Can I come study? I keep
getting distracted
Louis: of course i’m here with
Liam though
Harry: Be there soon.

Louis bit his lip as he looked to his phone and then up at Liam. He couldn’t deny his pulse
raced at just the mention that Harry was coming by. They had this incredible sexual
chemistry and no matter how much time had passed, it was still hard to keep his hands off of
him.

Which was why it made it all the more complicated to have him here with Liam at the table.

“My friend Harry is going to come study with us.”

Liam didn’t look up from his notes, but said, “who?”

“I met him at that football game.” Louis tried to keep his voice as casual as possible, but he
felt like he could hear the strain in it. “I’m not sure if you remember.”

Liam looked up with a smirk. “Yeah, I remember.”

Louis scowled at him and they stared at each other for a moment before both went back to
their work.

Just as he’d finished reviewing his section, the chair next to him pulled out. He looked up to
see Harry, flushed from the heat, slipping into the seat. Harry’s bag landed on the table and
Louis scooted his Crim Law book out of the way.

“Hi Lou,” Harry said, the words coming out slowly like they did when he was tired. “And
you must be Liam.”

Harry extended a hand over the table and Liam looked bewildered for a second before he
shook it.

“Hey man, nice to meet you.”

Louis pulled the highlighter cap from between his teeth, where it had been while he’d
blocked a whole section in neon green, and snapped it back onto the highlighter.

“How’s it going, H?”

“Horrible. You?”

“Same.” Louis tapped his highlighter against the notebook and then turned his textbook to the
pages Liam had been reading earlier. “What’s up with you?”

Harry sighed heavily and tugged his laptop out of his bag. “I’ve got an essay due Friday, but
it’s a meet day so I’m trying to cram it early.”

Louis wrinkled his nose.

“What sport do you play?” Liam asked.

“I swim. It’s the first home meet of the year,” Harry said, smiling at them easily. “Y’all
should come.”

Louis felt his face go pink and he looked back down to his book. Harry’s words had him
feeling unexpectedly shy, like someone was going to see the guy he had a crush on.

He was still figuring out what to say back when Liam said, “Sure.”

Louis nodded and Harry smiled at them both before they all started to work again.
At some point, Louis looked up from his reading on the second amendment, unsure about
how much time had passed. He’d finished for his class the next day and was reading ahead
for Thursday, but he’d been startled from his focus by Liam letting out a heavy sigh. The
three of them had been working silently for ages, so long he wasn’t even sure what time it
was.

He glanced over to Liam. He was frowning at his laptop and then frowning at his reading in
steady, even glances. Louis flicked his eyes next to him; Harry’s head was slumped forward
and his eyes were closed. His hands were still on his keyboard, but the screen had gone black.

He had to purse his lips together to control the smile threatening his face.

“I’m calling it,” Liam whispered. “I’m dead tired.”

Louis nodded. “I think I’m going to keep pushing.”

“I don’t know how you do it, man.” Liam said the words easily, like it was a compliment.

“I heard a rumor last week that I was part robot,” Louis offered in explanation, leaning
slightly to tuck his leg up underneath him. They’d meant it as a joke and he could have
minded, but he didn’t. He didn’t care what they thought of him.

Liam chuckled quietly, double checking he had packed everything, and tugged the zipper on
his backpack closed.

“I heard that too.” He shook his head like it was ridiculous, laughter still clinging to the
corner of his lips. “They said your nickname should be Murderbot.”

Louis snorted, then covered his hand with his mouth as he laughed. “I’ll take that.”

Liam joined in and rounded the table, clapping Louis once on the shoulder before saying,
“See you tomorrow.”

“Night!” Louis called after him. He watched Liam walk towards the door and realized that
there was no one else left in the library. Every off shooting hallway was dark, the automatic
lights dimming out with no activity.

With Liam gone, Harry’s presence felt bigger. He was in Louis’ space, again. Always in his
house, his bed, and now his study place. Maybe it could have been stifling, too much, but
Louis liked it. He liked any time he got to spend with Harry.

Checking his phone showed it was just past ten. Like the sight of the time triggered it, he let
out a loud yawn, which thankfully didn’t startle Harry at all.

Louis closed his book quietly and then packed his bag up. The quiet snore Harry let out had a
smile curving on Louis’ face. His hands slipped off the keyboard and fell to his lap, but still
he didn’t wake.

The chair made a soft scraping sound on the commercial grade carpet as he scooted out of it.
Slowly, he closed Harry’s laptop and then slipped it into his backpack with his notebook and
pencil.

It took him a moment of staring at Harry to decide on the best course of action. With his right
hand he brushed at the hair on Harry’s forehead, then rubbed around his eyebrow to his
temple.

Quietly, he said, “Harry, baby, wake up.”

Harry let out another snore, louder this time, before he startled awake.

Louis chuckled lowly at the bewildered look on his face as Harry’s eyes darted from his
missing laptop to Louis’ arm, which still had a hand pressed to Harry’s cheek.

“Good morning, sunshine,” Louis said, his voice teasing, but low in the quiet room. “Good
nap?”

Harry groaned and tilted his head side to side to stretch. “No. How long was I out?”

“Not sure,” Louis answered, honestly. “I only noticed a couple of minutes ago. Liam just
left.”

Harry nodded and then cleared his throat. “Thanks for packing my things.”

Louis cocked his head to the side. “Who’s to say I didn’t let someone steal them?”

Harry gave him a slow smile and said, “You wouldn’t.”

Louis hummed in agreement and tucked a smile away. “Did you finish your essay?

“Yeah.” Harry let out a heavy sigh and ran a hand through his hair. “Though I’m not sure if
it’s any good.”

He pushed out of his chair and stretched his back when he stood. Louis eyed the way his shirt
pulled across his chest and the jut of his hip bones through the fabric. He wanted to trace it
with his thumb, press against it and hear Harry’s breath catch. Instead, he fiddled with the
strap of his bag on his shoulder.

“Did you want to come over?”

“Lou, I’m exhausted.”

He took another glance around the room to be certain it was empty before moving into
Harry’s space. His hand found a home on Harry’s waist, his skin warm underneath the thin t-
shirt. He gently kissed Harry’s cheek and felt him smile under his lips.

“I’m not asking for anything, baby. A cuddle, maybe. I could read over your essay.”

“You’d do that?” Harry tilted his head to rest it against Louis’, his fingers tugging on the
bottom of Louis’ shirt. It was intoxicating to be this close to him. The warmth he radiated, the
faint smell of chlorine that clung to him and underneath that the smell of his deodorant and
something herbal - Louis loved to be wrapped up in it.

It had been just over a month since they’d met and fallen into each other. They had grown
increasingly comfortable - with how they touched, how they spoke to each other. But there
was a line that they hadn’t crossed since that very first night after they’d decided to be no
strings attached - it was always sex. If Harry stayed the night, well, then they just were too
tired after. But this was a different sort of offer.

“Yeah, of course.”

“Okay, yeah,” Harry said, grinning at him and then kissing the center of his forehead quickly.
“That’d be nice.”

They stayed like that for a moment longer before walking outside and crossing two parking
lots to where Harry had left his car earlier in the day.

Just inside the threshold of his room, they dropped their bags, before shuffling into his
bathroom where he now kept a second toothbrush for Harry sitting in the cup next to his own.
With brushed teeth and washed faces, they went back into his room, and Harry slipped his
laptop from his bag.

They both scooted back onto the bed until their backs were against the wall.

“What class is this for?” Louis said as Harry handed him the laptop.

“I have a humanities minor?” Harry said, like a question. “It’s for a cultural history class.”

Louis nodded, squinting at the screen. While he read, he kept an eye on Harry next to him,
propped up against the headboard and playing on his phone. Louis made some grammatical
corrections and added a couple of notes on the Google Doc as he went. Harry drifted lower
and lower in the bed until his head was on the pillow. Louis switched to scrolling with his left
hand and dropped his right into Harry’s hair, tangling it in the curls. Harry practically purred
under his fingertips and Louis smiled to himself.

He finished reading a few minutes later, writing a brief critique at the bottom of the document
before closing it out. A glance at Harry showed his phone face down on his chest, which was
rising and falling steadily, his eyes closed, and his mouth slightly parted in sleep.

Louis pursed his lips in a fond smile and slipped out of bed. Harry’s laptop was placed into
his backpack, his phone plugged into the spare charger Louis now kept ready on the other
side of his bed. Dropping his shirt and shorts to the floor, he turned off all the lights but the
lamp on his bedside table.

For the second time that night, he carefully brushed Harry’s brow and cheek.

“Baby, H, let’s get under the covers, hm?”

Harry made a snuffling sound and rolled to press his face into the pillow. Distantly, Louis
wondered if he was breathing in the scent of Louis’ shampoo or if after all the times Harry
had used it in the last month it smelled like both of them now.

He skimmed his finger around Harry’s jaw and tickled down his neck. Harry smiled into the
pillow and then twisted his back and reached around behind himself to jerk the covers. In one
swift movement he was underneath them.

Louis let out a short, sharp laugh and then slipped into the bed, watching Harry’s legs shift
under the blanket until his gym shorts came flying out from underneath.

“You’ll never find them,” Louis said quietly and watched as Harry smiled, but didn’t
otherwise respond.

He reached up and turned off the light before settling fully under the covers. The warm press
of Harry’s hand found his under the blanket, curling their fingers together before Harry rolled
and tugged him close.

Louis’ hips cradled Harry’s, his arm tight around Harry’s waist and fingers still tangled with
Harry’s against his chest in a comfortable spoon.

“Knew you’d be the little spoon,” Louis said to the back of his neck, pressing a kiss just
where his hair brushed against his skin.

“Like to be held,” Harry mumbled, voice heavy with sleep.

“I know, baby.”

He snuggled back into Louis’ chest and let out another sigh. Louis kissed his neck again and
tightened his arm around his waist.

It might still just be a friends with benefits thing between them, but as they fell asleep
together, Louis realized the benefits might be more than he’d originally thought.

The only class Louis had on Fridays ended at 10:30. He’d only just stepped out of the
classroom when Liam sidled up next to him, coming from a lecture hall on the same floor.

“The meet starts at eleven right?”

Louis cocked his head to the side. “Were you serious about that?”

It surprised him that Liam would want to go. After all, he’d only met Harry for a couple of
hours and they had only said a handful of words to each other.

“Yeah!” Liam shrugged. “I really like going to events and games, but our schedule feels so
insane right now I feel like I never have the time. Kind of feels like knowing someone who’s
competing is the excuse I need to convince myself it’s okay to go.”

“I get what you mean,” Louis agreed. “I was going to work on some reading while we were
there because I can’t fathom taking a two hour break.”

Liam laughed dryly. “That’s a good idea, actually.”

Outside the law building they turned left, the early October sun hot on their faces, but at least
the humidity had cut a smidge.

The O’Connell Center was only a fifteen minute walk, and when they arrived, there was only
a short line to wait in before they showed their student IDs for free admission.

The pool area was decked in orange and blue bunting strung across the ceiling and smelled
thickly of chlorine. In the center of the room were two small pools, one of which was full of
swimmers, multiple people per lane. Against the far wall were a set of bleachers and they
carefully avoided the patches of water all over the floor as they made their way towards them.

They picked a near empty section of the bleachers and climbed to the top. Louis leaned back
against the concrete wall and watched the pool deck as swimmers climbed in and out of the
warm up pool and fans slowly streamed in.

“Do you know what he swims?”

Louis nodded. “He does distance swimming. Not sure what he’s in today, but last meet he did
the 500m and 1000m.”

Liam pulled his face down and to the side, looking impressed.

“Have you ever been to a swim meet before?” Louis asked, tugging his reading out of his
backpack together with a pencil and highlighter. He pushed the pencil behind his ear and
hooked the highlighter to the collar of his shirt by the cap.

“No, never,” Liam said. He pulled out his work as well, balancing a textbook and a notebook
on his lap. “Have you?”

Louis snorted. “No, not really my thing.”

“But now it is?” A smirk played on his lips.

“No comment,” Louis said, bumping their shoulders together. Liam rolled his eyes and then
focused on his work.

Louis scanned the pool deck, squinting at all the male swimmers in the blue Florida suits
trying to figure out which one was Harry. Most of them already had on their caps and some
their goggles, so it took him a minute to locate Harry climbing out of the practice pool. He
was laughing at something one of the female swimmers had said, his mouth wide in a
familiar smile and dimples deep in his cheeks.
It was impossible to miss him when he was smiling like that. He lit up the whole room. There
was just something so captivating about him - how broad his shoulders looked when they
slimmed right down to the small swimsuit stretched around him, the rippling of his back
muscles as he gestured with his hand and the smooth tan all down his body.

Louis tracked him across the pool deck as he walked over to his bag and then spoke with his
coaches. He could watch him all day probably. He’d never been someone who lacked focus,
just sometimes he was focusing on the wrong things.

He bit his lip and looked back down to his notebook.

The emcee in the arena announced the first heats, but he didn’t bother looking up as they
rattled off the names in the relay groups. First the women, then the men. They hurtled
through the races so quickly that he’d only read half a chapter when he heard Harry’s name
called over the intercom.

His head snapped up sharply and he scanned the swimmers on the blocks, spotting Harry all
the way in lane number seven. He was pulling at the cap on his head, adjusting it before
shaking out his arms and leaning down to the starting position.

He nudged Liam and said, “he’s in lane seven.”

Liam looked over, his eyes tightening as he squinted. “I don’t know how you can even tell.”

He couldn’t say he’d touched every inch of that body, the curve of his waist, the muscles in
his legs, gripped the strength of his shoulders.

So, instead he said, “they called his name. You must have missed it.”

The buzzer went off and the swimmers were off the blocks. Around them the stands were
loud as people cheered, though the swimmers were still underwater. Harry was one of the last
to surface and Louis was surprised to realize they were doing a different stroke than Harry
had done last time.

The board listed the event as the 400m Individual Medley. Louis had no idea what that
meant.

The swimmers took the first turn and Louis sat back so he was resting against the wall again.
He fished his phone from his pocket, swiping away notifications from his sister Lottie and
another from Niall, before googling what the event was.

According to the Wikipedia page it meant they’d swim one 100m increment per stroke. Right
now they were on the 3rd 25m of the Butterfly stroke and then they’d transition to backstroke
before breast and then freestyle. He didn’t know that Harry swam any other strokes, but he
was captivated as he watched his arms arc through the water, powerful as they sliced through
it with each movement.

Harry turned second off the butterfly and fell slightly behind in the backstroke, before
slipping off further in the breast stroke. There was a joke to be made in there somewhere, but
Louis was too on the edge of his seat to make it.

His coursework was entirely abandoned on his lap by the time Harry turned into the last
stroke. He was sixth coming off the wall according to the scoreboard at the end of the arena.

“Do you think he can make it up?” Liam asked.

“I don’t know,” Louis answered honestly, still watching with rapt attention. “He’s not a
sprinter, but he also likes the psychology of a race. I’m not sure which will win out.”

Liam hummed thoughtfully. He wasn’t sure if it was his lack of blind faith in Harry or just
knowing his race strategy that had Liam make that noise.

Harry took the last turn in fourth and Louis held his breath until he touched the wall. In third.

Two of his teammates touched before him and he tried to squint at Harry’s face in the pool,
but all he could see at the distance was Harry’s face turned to the board and a slight tilt to his
head.

“Is that… bad?” Liam asked.

Louis shrugged. “Dunno, mate.”

He watched Harry climb out of the pool and drip onto the pool deck. His coach was saying
something to him and Harry was nodding several times, his chest heaving with labored
breathing, before walking over and joining his teammates.

Louis bit his lip and went back to his work. The races continued on in the background and
Louis worked through his Crim Law notes and then onto his Torts. He was just finishing it up
when he heard the announcer call the women for the 500m.

Scanning the deck for Harry, Louis caught him standing with a couple people behind the
blocks. His goggles were stretched onto his forehead, which made it much easier to recognize
him across the room. The girls shot off at the buzzer and Harry started to shake his limbs out.

Louis kept an eye on him as he shuffled his books around to start on the next section. The
women were halfway through when Harry looked towards the stands, sweeping across them
before snagging on Louis and Liam.

He knew exactly when it happened because a slow smile rose on his face, his dimple popping
into his cheek and his nose wrinkling in happiness. Louis couldn’t help a matching smile, his
lips pursing together around it. He raised his hand in a small wave and Harry gave him a
short head nod.

Harry turned back to his teammates, but the smile remained on his face. Louis glanced down
at his notes again, trying to suppress his smile. Next to him Liam made another thoughtful
noise in his throat and he didn’t dare look up to see if it was at him or at his reading.

Minutes later the women finished swimming and the men took the blocks. Harry was in lane
three and Louis watched him stretch his arms again before stepping up onto it. He fiddled
with the goggles over his eyes as his shoulders rose with three deep breaths before bending
over into starting position. At the first sound his whole body tightened from his fingers,
rippling down his back muscles and then his legs, all the way to his toes gripping the block.
At the next he was flying off with the rest of the swimmers.

Like each time he swam, Louis watched with rapt attention. There was just something so
different in how he moved in the water, like you could see how much he loved it. How much
he relished each movement, each push, each kick.

This time, when Harry upped his pace after the turn, Louis saw it. He wouldn’t have if he
wasn’t paying such close attention to him. But the last one hundred meters, those last four
lengths, Harry was faster and faster. In the end he touched the wall first and the announcer
said he’d broken his personal best time.

The cheers washed over the arena, shaking the stands and a few people in the rows below
them were doing Gator chomps. Liam stuck his fingers in his mouth and let out two sharp
whistles. Harry’s cap and goggles were pulled off and he was squinting up at the time with a
pleased smile on his face. He flicked his eyes to Louis for a moment, his smile seeming to
pull wider for a fraction of a second before he climbed out of the pool.

“That was great,” Liam said, still clapping his hands lightly even as the cheering died down.

Louis nodded, mouth a bit dry from the way Harry pushed his hand through his wet hair and
dripped endlessly onto the pool deck.

“He’s really good,” Liam tacked on, nudging Louis with his elbow to get his attention. “Did
you know?”

Louis waved a hand and said, “Vaguely. He mentioned the Olympics were a bit of a pipe
dream.”

Liam raised an eyebrow.

The next race started, but neither of them paid any mind to it.

“I don’t know a lot about swimming, but it doesn’t seem like that much of a stretch, does it?”

Louis looked back to Harry, who was still smiling as he took a direction from his coach.
Louis could see something special in Harry, some brightness in him, something sparkly,
something magic, but he thought it was just how he felt about him. Maybe it was an aura he
had, like he was a person just on the cusp of greatness.

“Maybe,” Louis finally settled on. “Maybe you’re right.”

Later that day he was back in his bedroom, sprawled on the mattress in his underwear and a
loose vest top. He’d just hung up from a call with his mum, only able to catch up on her week
before it was cut short by the twins having a meltdown. The phone dropped down on the
mattress next to him with a dull thud as he stared at the ceiling, watching the delicate way the
afternoon sun filtered through the blinds into his room.

The meet ended twenty minutes after Harry’s race and he’d filed out of the building with
Liam. Harry remained on his mind when they sat at their usual place in the library and
worked on their Con Law homework for Monday. As much as he tried, Louis couldn’t focus
and ended up giving in early, saying goodbye and walking home when the library was still
full of his classmates.

He took a slow shower and then watched an old rerun of Black Books on his laptop.
Something about hearing Bernard ask for an ice lolly had him itching for home and he called
his mum outside their weekly scheduled time.

The sun pinked against his ceiling and he felt his eyes get heavy. He’d been tired for… well
for years now at this point. He held himself so taut at all times. Like he was always ready to
snap or break or go off on someone. Some things made that easier, like Harry, but he’d
wiggled himself into this rigorous environment where one misstep always felt like the end of
the world.

Like being well rested could mean he’d lose his edge.

But still his eyes closed, his body sunk into the mattress and he felt the weight of sleep settle
over him.

He was just about asleep when his phone vibrated next to him.

A whine crawled from his throat. He wanted to ignore it, but he couldn’t stop the niggling
thought that it might be important.

It vibrated again and Louis rolled onto his stomach, burying half his face in the pillow and
squinting with his other eye at the phone.

Harry

Harry: I’m a little teensy eensy bit drunk

Harry: Are you out?

Louis bit his lip before responding.

Harry

Harry: Are you out?

Louis: i was almost asleep actually
Harry: in your cell?
Louis: my bed if you can believe it
Harry: can I come over?
Louis: sure but im not moving
He dropped the phone back to the bed, half listening to hear if it went off again, but it didn’t.
While he waited he shut his eyes for just a moment.

He must have fallen asleep because the next thing he knew the bed was sinking down next to
him and cool fingertips skated across his temple.

“Hi,” Louis whispered with his eyes still closed.

Harry let out a giggle, fitting his body next to Louis’ on the bed. The smell of chlorine,
Harry’s herbal soap, and alcohol wafted over to him. Louis rolled onto him, his face pressed
right into Harry’s armpit and breathed in the scent of him.

Fingertips rubbed through his hair and then Harry’s arm fit under his body and wrapped
around his shoulder.

“Lou,” Harry sing-songed into his ear, his fingertips tickling under the collar of his shirt.

“You’re drunk,” Louis said with his face still nestled against Harry’s ribcage. He was
stubbornly trying to cling to sleep, exhaustion still settled deep in his bones.

“Only a little bit,” Harry reasoned. “And look - I’m still in bed by nine.”

“Not your own though.” Louis shifted slightly, his bare legs tangling with Harry’s under the
sheets.

“Why would I? When I can be here.” His lips ghosted over Louis’ forehead and he smiled
into Harry’s side, humming, then pressing a kiss to his side, just a barely there brush to his t-
shirt. “Thank you for coming today.”

“‘Course.” Louis nuzzled in closer and then said, “You did really good, baby. Even Liam was
impressed.”

He felt Harry smile against his forehead, the way his cheek bunched up and a blooming heat
against his skin. His words were soft when he said, “Thanks, Lou.”

Louis’ cheek rubbed over the fabric of Harry’s shirt as he nodded. Moving a hand around
Harry’s waist, he said, “Had to Google what your first swim was.”

Harry snorted.

“Could have just asked someone.”

“No way.”

A huff of air blew out over Louis’ nose, causing it to twitch.

“I don’t usually swim the IM, but I’ve been working on my other strokes a lot, so I wanted to
give it a go.”

“Did really well.” Louis could feel the heaviness of sleep start to claw at him again.
“It means a lot to me that you watched.”

Louis gave him a half-hearted squeeze and Harry kissed his cheek in response. The bed
jostled as Harry shifted down, his nose skimming from Louis’ temple to right next to his lips.
Warm breath coasted over his skin, a bit sour from alcohol, but Louis hardly minded. Harry
pressed a kiss to the corner of his lips.

Louis let out a quiet sigh and wished he were more awake, but he couldn’t even stand to open
his eyes.

“Lou,” Harry whispered, poking him in the side lightly. “I’m really horny.”

He paused for a moment and then broke down into giggles. Louis let out a huff of laughter
and cracked an eye open for the first time since Harry had gotten there. Harry’s body shook
under his arm and had him rocking lightly on the bed, almost a simulation of fucking and it
had Louis’ smiling into Harry’s neck.

He licked his lips and then whispered, “I told you I wasn’t moving.”

Harry scoffed, but didn’t sound too bothered. He shuffled slightly on the bed and then he was
pressing himself to Louis’ thigh, his cock partially hard.

“Is it okay if I get off?”

Louis ran his tongue along his bottom lip and tried to assess if his body could be persuaded to
be interested, but his mind remained firmly asleep.

“Can come on me if you want.”

“Yeah?” Harry ground forward once against him, his voice already gone a little breathy with
arousal.

“If you wanna.”

Harry left a messy kiss to his forehead and then slipped his arm out from under Louis’ head.
An annoyed sound slipped out of the back of his throat and Harry let out a low chuckle. He
pushed Louis onto his back and he went easily, too tired and out of it to be arsed as Harry
arranged him to his liking.

A moment later, Harry’s weight was on his lap and his t-shirt was being pushed up.

“Love your belly,” Harry said, flattening his hand on Louis’ stomach and then running it
along the muscles and across the waistband of his underwear. “Always so gorgeous, Lou.”

Louis fluttered his lashes like he was trying to open them, but didn’t.

He could feel Harry on him, jerking himself off. His hips were flexing with the movement,
rubbing against Louis’ cock and he could feel himself start to get aroused, but he stayed
laying there half asleep.
But still, it seemed to do something for Harry, who ground down against him and let out a
low moan. Louis ran his hands up Harry’s thighs, felt the muscle flexing as Harry worked
over himself and gripped them lightly.

He could hear Harry’s hand stroking himself, could feel the pleasure in every move he made
in Louis’ lap. With his eyes closed, it felt like Harry was all around him. He could be lulled to
sleep like that - a physical lullaby just for him.

When he started to come Louis felt it first in the tightening of his thighs, the shifting of his
arse and then the warm pool of come on his stomach.

Harry let out a ragged moan and Louis slipped his hands down to Harry’s knees. He opened
his eyes just slightly to see Harry spread over his lap, his underwear tugged down just enough
to get his cock and balls out and his hand slowing down on the pull. His chest was moving
rapidly and he was looking down at the mess he made with his bottom lip between his teeth.

Louis glanced at the come on his stomach, drying quickly from the breeze of the ceiling fan
and, nonsensically, said, “Thank you.”

Harry laughed and then smiled at him, warm and hazy from his orgasm. “Any time, Lou.”

He closed his eyes again, still smiling. Harry wiped him off and then left a kiss just above his
belly button before flopping down next to him.

Louis was pulled back onto him, Harry’s arm slipping under his head again and Louis moved
easily, sleep just about slipping over him. He was still half hard in his underwear, but that
could be a morning problem. For now, he was warm, he was comfortable, he felt perfect in
Harry’s arms.

October was speeding forward and Louis felt like he was barely keeping up. As if he’d
blinked and it was nearly over. He spent nearly all of it in the library, either studying with
Liam (and occasionally Harry) or locked in his study cubicle.

That’s where he was now, the last Thursday of the month. He was dreading the start of
November. November meant that exams were just around the corner and that, before he knew
it, his first semester would be done. He was still dodging his mum on booking his flights
home for Christmas hols, but it was getting to the point if he didn’t book soon there’d be no
option to go. Louis couldn’t quite work out with himself if that’s what he’d been hoping for
or not.

The work for his Intro to Lawyering class was piling up and he was trying to push his way
through it now. He felt like he kept putting it to the side, so focused on the other three classes
he had, but with November looming he needed to get going. Halfway through his study
guide, there was a knock on his door.

He pushed it open with his elbow and said, “Yeah?” before even bothering to look up.

“You never take a break, do you?”

He turned to his right to see Harry taking up most of the doorway. His hair was windblown
and he had on an ugly button down tucked into black trousers. His brows were pinched
together and his shoulder pulled up slightly like the perfect picture of stress.

When he didn’t know what to say, he employed sarcasm.

“What is it, career day in the business school?”

Harry smiled reflexively. “What is it, cranky day at the law school?”

Louis rolled his eyes, but couldn’t help smiling back at him.

Harry stepped inside the room and the door closed softly behind him. There was barely
enough room in there for the two of them, but they always made it work. Harry had stopped
in on occasion since the first time he’d come by, but usually it was to change location to the
regular part of the library or to drag him home.

“I’m slammed here, H.” Louis turned back to his work and Harry hovered over his shoulder.
“What’s up?”

“I don’t know.” Harry leaned onto the desk next to him and then crossed his arms. “Had a bit
of a weird one today and I’m feeling a little stressed about the meet tomorrow.”

Louis scrunched his nose and highlighted the last words he wrote. “That sucks.”

Harry let out a huff and Louis cut his eyes to him quickly.

“Is there anything I can do to help?” he added, looking back at his work.

“Um,” Harry started and then nudged Louis’ foot with his own. “Lou, can I give you a
blowjob?”

Louis snorted and rolled his eyes. “I’d love it, if you just wait until I’m done.”

Harry sighed and Louis wrote down another line. “How long do you think?”

“H, I’ll kick you out,” Louis flicked his eyes up to him and threatened half-heartedly. “I have
like another dozen pages or so to get through.”

“Fine, I’ll be good.” Harry pulled out his phone and went quiet as he fiddled on it.

Louis looked back to his work and completely zeroed in on it. He was excellent at completely
losing himself in the work and he relished it. There was nothing that was quite like taking
yourself out of the equation and thinking only of the task in front of you.

The problem with that is he didn’t always notice the little things, like Harry dropping to his
knees. Like Harry scooting under the table.

It wasn’t until his hands were tugging at the fly button of Louis’ shorts that he realized what
was happening.

“What the fuck are you doing?” Louis asked, spreading his knees wider and looking at Harry
between them.

Harry popped the button and pulled the zipper, commanding, “up.”

He tugged at the waistband and Louis lifted as if on instinct. His notes were on his mind, but
his body reacted to the sight of Harry between his knees. It was always a gorgeous vision -
Harry always looked so hungry for him. It had him getting a semi from the sight alone.

A moment later, Louis’ boxers were down and his cock out and between his knees Harry was
licking his lips as it fattened in his hand.

“H, what’re you doing?” Louis asked again, his pulse hammering in his ears. The walls in
these cubicles were so thin that he could usually hear nearly everything his neighbors did, so
surely they could hear him as well. And he wasn’t sure who else was in that afternoon. It was
an awkward time in the day, but you never knew.

“Waiting,” Harry said. “Okay?”

His lips wrapped around the head of Louis’ cock, but didn’t move. Louis’ mouth parted in
surprise and he nearly moaned when he realized Harry’s intention.

He was going to wait there on his knees, with Louis’ cock in his mouth, until Louis was
done. Until he told Harry he was allowed to continue. Louis bit his bottom lip and nodded.
Yes, it was okay. It was more than okay.

Harry hummed and took a bit more in his mouth and then sat with his palms up on his thighs.
Louis watched him for a moment longer, his breathing uneven and the temperature in his
cubicle rising higher by the second, before turning back to his work.

It was hard to focus with Harry’s mouth on his cock, the delicious wet heat enveloping him
and the steady pressure was the most scrumptious tease. He could barely think through it.

He went a bit light headed from the pleasure as he worked through the last pages of his
reading. Every couple of minutes he had to check himself and he couldn’t stop looking down
at Harry. His eyes were closed, like he was focusing solely on the feeling of Louis in his
mouth. On not moving.

When he finished the last page of his reading, his notes had devolved to a messy scribble and
he knew he’d have to rework them. Louis could hardly care.
His notebook rustled softly when he closed it first and then his book right after with a heavier
slap, but Harry didn’t react to either sound. He remained unmoving, unseeing, and his jaw
had to be hurting by now, but he looked serene, at peace.

Louis dropped a hand to Harry’s head and then curved it along his temple. Harry’s eyes
fluttered open. The green of them was startling in the dim lighting under the desk, nearly
glowing amidst the dank surroundings. Louis swallowed hard and felt a shiver of pleasure
run down his whole body. Harry moved off slightly, tongue swiping over the slit, his lashes
fluttering as he tasted Louis’ precome.

“You’re so good,” Louis whispered, trailing his thumb down Harry’s cheek and resting right
next to his lips.

Harry pulled off all the way, his tongue trailing the underside until it was all that connected
them. He pressed a kiss to Louis’ thumb still hovering next to his mouth.

“Am I done waiting?” The words tumbled out rough from arousal and had Louis catching his
breath with how lovely he sounded.

Louis nodded, his head heavy with it all and whispered, “Yeah, baby.”

Harry smiled up at him, lids low, as he took Louis back in his mouth. For all his waiting, he
didn’t rush himself now. He worked Louis over slowly and Louis could feel every curl of his
lip, every brush of his tongue, every touch of his fingers.

Pleasure started to bubble in his veins, gradually rising to the surface under Harry's steady
pace, and he had to bite into his own wrist as he came. Harry swallowed, throat bobbing, and
tongue licking over the head to make sure he got it all.

He sat back, breathless, with spit and come dripping down his chin to palm at his own cock
through his shorts a couple of times. Louis’ chest was rising and falling in time with the
blood rushing in his ears.

When it calmed a bit, he tucked his cock back in his underwear and pulled his shorts back up.
He scooted out slightly so Harry could walk on his knees out from under the desk. He’d been
bent awkwardly underneath and cracked his back in a long series of pops when he was freed.

Harry took him by surprise when, instead of standing up, he leaned forward and wrapped his
arms around Louis’ stomach in a tight hug. Louis curled his arms around Harry’s shoulders
and curved forward to press a kiss to the top of his head.

“Alright?”

Harry nodded into his abdomen. “Yeah, thanks. I needed that.”

“Did you?”

Harry let out a quiet, breathy laugh. “Just need to get out of my head.”
His back was warm as Louis ran a hand along it, smoothing over his shoulder blades and then
up to up the nape of Harry’s neck. He wasn’t sure what to say, so he stayed quiet.

Eventually Harry’s grip loosened and they pulled apart. Harry’s face almost looked back to
normal. Gone was the pinch between his brows he’d had when he’d arrived and the nervous
energy he had. He smiled easily up at Louis and then leveraged himself off Louis’ knees to
stand up.

“Did you want to go?” Louis asked. He’d finished most of his work and the rest could wait a
bit.

“Have you had dinner?”

Louis smiled.

His bag was packed and he was locking the door to his study room only a minute later. He
felt like someone would be able to read on his face what they had just done, but nobody was
in the hall when they exited and the other rooms were quiet. He let out a breath of relief.

Harry seemed unbothered, forging ahead towards the front doors. Louis tripped behind him.
As they walked through rows of tables a few people smiled at Harry as if they recognized
him and maybe they did. He was on a mural outside Mina’s chem class, so who knew where
else his face was plastered on campus. But for every person who smiled at Harry, someone
else tossed Louis a glare.

Harry gave him a confused look over his shoulder, but Louis had to smother a smile behind
his hand until they pushed outside.

“Is dinner still on at the dining hall?”

“I was thinking of the tacos at the Tex Mex place down the road.”

Louis shrugged, not feeling particularly arse about where they went. “Lead the way.”

It was a nice night, still warm, but not horrendously so. They walked, bumping hands, to the
restaurant. The outdoor seating in the front was full, but when they went inside the hostess
led them to a table in the back. It was the first time he’d ever been out with Harry, even if
they were just out as friends. It was still exciting in a new sort of way, like things were
changing, but he couldn’t quite put his finger on it.

“You should have a margarita.” Harry had the menu up blocking his face as he looked it over.

“Should I?” Louis scanned over the long list of cocktails. “Why’s that?”

“Because I want one, but I can’t drink the night before a meet.”

“Is it watching me drink it that’s going to satisfy you?” Louis started and then knocked
Harry’s ankle with his under the table. “Or did you want to taste it later?”
Harry’s lips curled into a smirk and he’d just opened his mouth to respond when their waiter
walked up.

Harry ordered an ice water and Louis ordered the margarita, as requested. Tequila wasn’t his
favorite, but if it was Harry’s… well, he could give it a go.

Tortilla chips and salsa were dropped onto the table with their drinks and Louis was
munching on them when Harry spoke.

“I feel like it was weird back there.”

“Back where?” Louis asked, crumbs falling down his front. He brushed them off under the
table and then smiled cheekily at Harry.

“At the library. A bunch of them looked like they’d like to knock you over the head with their
law books.”

The words startled a laugh out of him, the image of it was funny. True, but funny.

“Well, yeah.” He took another bite of a chip and then held his hand over his mouth as he
continued speaking. “None of them like me.”

Harry’s face scrunched up. “What? Why? Nah, that’s ridiculous.”

“Easy for you to say, you’re obsessed with me.”

Throwing his straw wrapping at Louis, Harry scoffed. He swatted it away and tossed it back,
laughing at the affronted look on Harry’s face.

“Who said?”

“You did,” Louis said with a smile, his teeth biting into his lip the way Harry liked. He
pressed his ankle against Harry’s under the table again, but this time he kept it there.
“Besides, it’s mutual. We’ve discussed it, remember?”

Harry smiled down at his hands, maybe thinking of all the times they couldn’t keep their
hands to themselves, or how despite how busy they both were they kept carving out scraps of
time to spend together. Or maybe he was just thinking of Louis’ hand on his face as he
sucked him down not an hour before. They were tumbling through this mess together, barely
able to keep their eyes off each other.

The waiter came back and they both ordered. Harry got the tacos he’d wanted, and Louis
ordered something he’d never tried before. Maybe it was half the margarita he’d downed or
just Harry, gorgeous and smiling across from him, but he felt like being brave.

+
Harry’s last meet of October didn’t go the way he’d wanted it to. Even Louis could tell that
from the back of the stands with his limited knowledge of swimming. It wasn’t hard to figure
out when there was first place and there was last place and Harry hovered near the middle for
his first race and at the bottom from his second. He could see the tight line of Harry’s
shoulders from all the way back where he was sitting as well as the hard bite of his jaw.

At least he hadn’t brought Liam along, Louis thought as he packed his books up and trudged
out of the arena. Harry would probably be bothered enough that Louis had seen it.

Louis worked in the library for the better part of the afternoon and then went to a presentation
with a local judge, followed by a wine social that lasted until nine. He kept checking his
phone throughout expecting to hear something from Harry, but he didn’t.

While he walked home from the mixer, a little wine drunk in the dark night, he tried to figure
out what he could say. He kept typing and retyping a dozen variants of hi, how are you?, are
you okay? for the whole walk home and not sending a single one.

He turned onto his street, still looking at his phone, and wondered maybe if it’d be better for
him just to call.

A guy on a scooter passed by and Louis was startled from the noise, jumping slightly on the
pavement, before waving him off when the guy called out, “Sorry!” as he passed. He sighed
and tucked his phone away, looking up to see he was stopped in front of his neighbors house.

In his own driveway was Harry’s car, a little angled on the side he always parked in. The
headlights were off and Louis walked towards it curiously.

His mouth parted in surprise to see Harry in the front seat of his car, head slumped forward
like he was asleep. There was no light inside and he could only see him from the bare glow of
the muddy porch light that only worked half the time. Louis hovered just outside for a
moment before tapping on the window as softly as he could.

Harry jumped on the other side, looking at him for a moment like he didn’t even see him
properly. Louis stepped back as Harry pushed open the car door to avoid being hit and then
leaned against it. He waited for Harry to say something, but he didn’t.

“Have you been out here long?”

Scrunching his nose, Harry said, “I don’t know. I was just kind of driving around for a while
and ended up here.”

His thoughts tumbled over themselves on what that meant, if it even meant anything at all,
and finally Louis’ mouth settled on, “Oh.”

Harry chewed his lip and then said, “I don’t know why I thought you were kind of joking
about walking.”

Louis looked from his feet to the road behind him. It wasn’t too far from campus, but not a
lot of students walked.
“Weird thing to lie about.”

“I’ve heard weirder,” Harry countered.

“So have I.” Louis rolled his shoulders back. Tension had settled in throughout the day as he
worried about November looming ever closer and then about Harry. “My ex-boyfriend told
me his cousin was on Love is Blind. Untrue. I didn’t even ask, he just offered that up for no
reason.”

Harry snorted.

“Someone in middle school told me they were born in Sweden. No, they were born in
Kissimmee, they just had really blonde hair.”

“A classic,” Louis said with faux seriousness. He cocked his head towards the front door and
said, “You wanna come in?”

Harry pressed his lips together before nodding. Louis stepped back so that Harry could step
out and together they walked to the front door, not touching, like they usually would. It was
quiet between them, just the steady sounds of the cicadas and road noise from a couple streets
over.

“Did you want anything to drink?”

Harry didn’t say anything. When Louis turned to check, he was looking at the floor with his
brows knitted together.

“H?” he said, trying to verbally nudge him. “Did you?”

Harry raised his head and then shook it. Louis frowned as they moved towards his bedroom.
Without his primary way of caring for someone by feeding them, he was only left with
physical comfort. But if it came to words he was fucked.

When they entered his room Harry walked straight towards the bed and collapsed on it face
first with a low, “Oof”.

Louis closed the door and dropped his bag before kicking off his shoes. His socks and shorts
landed in a pile on the floor, hardly noticeable aa a new addition. The light in his night stand
turned on with a click, casting the room in a warm orange glow. Finally, he kneed on the bed
next to Harry's hip and skimmed his fingers up the back of his t-shirt.

Harry turned his face on the pillow to face him and looked at him with the saddest look in his
eyes. They were drooping half closed, the green of them dull with his mood.

“It’s just one meet.” As soon as the words left his mouth, he knew it was the wrong thing to
say.

Harry’s face shuttered. “You wouldn’t understand.”

“Trust me, I know all about losing.” Louis’ words were sharp with annoyance. He had a lot of
experience feeling like he couldn’t win. Years and years of it.

Harry sighed and closed his eyes. His lips twisted like he was trying to sort out what he
wanted to say, but he stayed quiet.

Finally, Louis said, “Do you want to tell me about it?”

The bed made a horrendous whine as Harry flopped on his back and threw his arm over his
forehead.

“When I have a bad swim I just get lost in this thought spiral.” Harry paused and let out a
loud breath, like he was shoving the thoughts out him by force. “Sometimes in swimming
when you work harder it goes worse. Does that make sense?”

Louis laid down on the bed next to Harry, but kept space between their bodies.

“Not really, explain it to me.”

Harry sighed, as if he was exasperated with himself.

“Like sometimes if you focus too much on your stroke, then you rush them and you just start
spinning your wheels in the water. Like you pull too much water in the wrong way and all of
a sudden you’re at a standstill.”

“That sounds frustrating.”

“It is and it always happens when you’re trying to get yourself out of something. I had a slow
start in my first race and so I tried to catch up, but I think I panicked and made it worse.”

Louis turned onto his side to watch Harry’s face as he spoke. His arm had fallen over his
eyes, but his mouth was curved down in a frown.

“Is that what happened in your second race?”

Louis thought back to that afternoon in the pool. Harry’s start had been okay, but he lost
speed for the entirety of the 1000m. Louis kept checking the scoreboard during the race,
nearly certain he was watching the wrong lane, as he’d seen Harry swim great at the first
meet and it almost seemed like an entirely different person in the pool.

“I just couldn’t stop thinking about the first race.”

“Okay…” Louis trailed off. “So, what? You just gave up because the first race was bad?”

Harry’s arm slipped from over his eye and he shot Louis a glare. Louis rolled his eyes back at
him.

“I can’t get it out of my head - the way everything just went so bad.”

“Surely you’ve had a bad meet before.”

“Well, yeah.” Harry sighed again and he was starting to sound pitiful. “Usually I mope
around until the funk fades.”

Louis’ lip curled in disgust at the thought.

“That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.” Harry looked over at him sharply. “You’re just
gonna wait around and ‘see what happens’? Fuck that, just get over it.”

Harry rolled his eyes up to the ceiling. “Wow, thanks. That’s so helpful, makes me feel a lot
better.”

When he sighed it settled heavily over the both of them. He frowned at Harry and then sat up
in bed, resting back against the headboard.

“Listen,” he started, poking Harry in the shoulder until he looked over at him. “Everyone in
my program thinks I’m some privileged arsehole with my nice housing and the study cube
and whatever. But I earned this. Every single bit of it. I worked my fucking ass off. I would
have had nothing for uni if I didn’t.”

He paused, but Harry didn’t say anything. There was just the steady sound of the ceiling fan
whirling above them and the low hum of the cicadas outside.

“I think a lot of manifestation stuff is bullshit,” he continued. “You can’t wish something into
existence, but I do believe that, like, if you can really see yourself getting what you want you
can have it. Like feel it, taste it. Know it in your bones. Then you can find the path to get
there.”

Harry opened his eyes and looked up at him. He still wasn’t smiling, hadn’t smiled all night,
but his face was open like he was listening. Like maybe he wanted to see what Louis was
talking about.

“You just need to reset. Rethink.” Louis pushed a curl off Harry’s forehead and Harry’s lips
twitched. “You can win, Harry. You can do it. I can see it so clearly, sunshine. Now I just
need you to see it too.”

The breath punched from Harry’s lungs in three separate, sharp exhales. Like he was trying to
hold it in, but lost a bit of it one after another. He closed his eyes, but his hand reached
towards Louis and rested on his thigh. It was a warm weight, Harry’s body always radiated
heat. Like he’d soaked up the Florida sun for twenty years and was now pouring it out into
the universe. The touch wasn’t sexual, it was comfort. As if he was trying to draw the
comfort out of Louis and into himself.

After a moment he said, “Thank you. For believing in me.”

“It’s not hard,” Louis answered honestly. He poked Harry in the side again. “But I can’t do it
alone.”

Harry nodded. “You’re right. I know you’re right.”

Louis hummed and nudged Harry’s hand on his thigh until he turned it over and he could link
them together. There was a steady warmth where their palms pressed together and he
squeezed Harry’s hand a couple times in a row in reassurance. He wasn’t trying to be mean
with his honesty, he was just trying to get Harry to wake up and see.

“Come cuddle,” Harry whispered. He was looking up at Louis with a small smile now, his
body turned part way towards him. The hardness, the tension that had been lining his body
seemed to have melted away with Louis’ words.

Louis reached up and turned off the light before sinking down into the bed. He kept their
hands linked between them, pulling Harry close by his waist and pressing a chaste kiss to his
lips.

“You’re gonna be okay, baby.”

 November

“I think I have a chance of getting the book award in Torts,” Josh drawled out. Louis was at a
bar downtown with a vodka soda sweating in his hand and surrounded by his classmates. It
was the first Friday in November and Louis was considering vehicular manslaughter to get
out of this conversation. As in, he’d gladly jump into traffic.

“Do you?” Louis answered, uninterested. Josh Mansfield was a privileged dumbass from the
Orlando suburbs. Daddy was a UF Law grad from the early aughts and instead of being
embarrassed about that fact, he brought it up every chance he had.

“I’m certain it could only be me,” Josh boasted, tossing back the rest of his whiskey sour. “Or
you, I guess.”

Louis gave him an awkward smile. Josh had cornered him on his way back from the bar in a
conversation that seemed to be more about boasting about his own accomplishments than
anything else. It was exhausting and annoying.

Over Josh’s shoulder he scanned the room for Liam and finally spotted him on the opposite
wall with two girls from their Crim Law class, nodding attentively while they spoke.

He was endlessly grateful he’d bonded with Liam at orientation. He reminded him so much
of Oli and Niall, like he was a strange amalgamation of both them. Like a two for one law
school deal on friends.

While Josh was in a rant about not being able to be a summer associate at his father’s firm,
Louis willed Liam to look up at him and when he finally did a few minutes later, Louis did
his best to convey he needed to come over right now. Liam’s eye twitched, like he wanted to
laugh, but was managing to hold it in.

When he finally did walk over, so did the two girls he’d been talking to. Louis was rapidly
trying to remember their names. Gladys and… Alix? Maybe? They were definitely in his
Crim Law class, but sat at the very back of the lecture hall so he hardly ever interacted with
them.

“Oh, hey,” Louis tried to say as casually surprised as he could when Liam stepped up next to
him. “Josh was just telling me about the summer associate opportunities at his dad’s firm.”

The girls nodded, but he could see the slight tremble in Liam’s lip.

“It’s such a struggle.” Josh sighed dramatically and then laid a hand heavily on his shoulder.
“But you know that, Louis.”

Louis cocked his head to the side, but the girl he thought was Gladys pursed her lips together.

“Oh,” Gladys started, that one word sounding delighted. Like she was going to confirm
something that she’d been wondering. “What is it that your parents do, Louis?”
He took a slow sip of his drink. “My mum’s a midwife.”

They all seemed to be waiting on him to continue, but he didn’t have anything to add. So he
let his comment hang there until finally her brow furrowed and she nodded. Josh’s hand fell
from his shoulder and Louis stood taller without the weight on him.

“And yours?” he finally tacked on. He didn’t give a fuck, to be honest, but it seemed only
polite.

“My dad’s in insurance,” she said, unsure. “My mom owns a boutique.”

He nodded, but Alix perked up and said, “Oh my god, I had been wanting to ask where you
got that dress!”

Louis rolled his eyes and turned to Liam. “Let’s go to the bar.”

He didn’t even wait for him to agree before he tugged him along behind him.

“You haven’t even finished your drink,” Liam said as he tripped after him.

“Better this than I pour it on someone.” They stopped at a spot of wall near the bar that was
less densely populated with their classmates. These mixers were the bane of his existence, but
he couldn’t convince himself not to go.

Liam snickered. “I don’t know why they all dislike you.”

“They think that I think that I’m better than them. It’s the accent.” Louis did swallow down
the rest of his drink then and let it burn down his throat before he continued. “They either
think it’s hot or that I’m a snob. Sometimes they think both, but then it confuses them.”

Liam snorted. “I don’t know if that’s true.”

“Trust me.” Louis bumped his shoulder against Liam’s. He’d run into the same thing from
time to time in undergrad and even more so at the summer internship he had in Boston. It was
a long summer of hooking up with someone who hated his guts most of the time, such a
miserably awful experience that he couldn’t even really think of his name.

But it was easier to act like that didn’t bother him. That it was just a joke, a mild
inconvenience.

“Alright, sure, if you say so.”

Louis was ready to rebut him, tease back, but his phone started vibrating in his pocket. “Hold
that thought.”

Tugging it out of his front pocket, he saw Harry’s name on the Caller ID. He smirked at the
screen, unconsciously, uncaring of Liam’s eyes on his face, and said, “I gotta take this.”

Liam nodded, lips pressed together like he was trying to hold in a smile, but couldn’t. “See
you later, man.”
Louis tossed him a smile over his shoulder and walked out the front door of the bar, swiping
to accept the call as he went.

“Hello,” he answered, hoping he didn’t sound too breathless. It was a warm night and the
road was busy with cars passing by. He had to press the phone tight to his ear to hear Harry
on the other side.

“I did it,” Harry said instead of a greeting. “Just like you said.”

Louis smiled against the phone, his eyes closing with how pleased he felt.

Harry had left the day before for a meet in Tennessee. Louis hadn’t said it to him again, that
he needed to believe, that he needed to see it. He figured he’d listen if he wanted to and if he
didn’t, well there was nothing he could do.

But still, Louis had sat in his study cubicle that afternoon with his headphones on and the
meet pulled up on his laptop, watching with bated breath to see how it went.

“Proud of you,” Louis breathed out. A group of guys were walking towards him on the
sidewalk so he pressed himself against the side of the building, broken glass and cigarette
butts crunching under the sole of his trainers.

He wished he could see Harry’s face, the way he reacted to those words. He thought he’d
smile, maybe even blush just at the tips of his ears.

“Thanks, Lou,” Harry whispered over the line.

He chewed his lip, ignoring the smell of piss on the street, and debated for a minute before he
said, “I watched online.”

“Did you?”

Louis hummed. “You did really good, baby.”

“I just… I really appreciate what you said. I think it was exactly what I needed to hear.”
Harry paused and then let out a loud sneeze. “Gah, I think I’m allergic to something in this
hotel.”

Louis wrinkled his nose. “Do you leave in the morning?”

“Yeah, first thing.” Harry sneezed again, this time three times in a row, each increasing in
volume. “Maybe we can get together tomorrow?”

He’d not seen Harry since they had a quickie against his bedroom door on Monday between
classes. They’d barely had time to savor it before Louis needed to get back for a lecture and
Harry needed to go to weights. Just the mere mention of it had him licking his lips.

“Yeah, that would be good. I’ve got a hot date with the library until the afternoon at least, but
just text me.”
Harry mumbled his agreement and a minute later they hung up. Louis looked at the door to
the bar and let out a long, dramatic sigh before heading back in.

He heard from Harry the next morning before his first coffee was even gone. His phone
vibrated across the desk in his cubicle until it buzzed into a mug with the dregs of his tea
from the week before still inside.

Harry

Harry: I don’t think it’s allergies.

I think I’m sick.
Harry: I’ll see you next week once
I’m feeling better.
Louis: let me know when you get
back to town

He frowned at his phone and thought back to the series of sneezes Harry had let out the night
before. Just when he was starting to feel better mentally, his body had to go and quit.

Sighing, Louis set an alarm on his phone for three hours later and then got back to work.

When his alarm sounded he jumped out of his chair. It hadn’t felt like more than half an hour
when he was smacking the end button on his phone.

He’d gotten several pages of notes done and worked through three chapters of reading. He sat
back and twisted to crack his back and then his neck. He liked to set alarms to schedule
breaks because otherwise he tended to be so focused he forgot.

When he rolled his shoulders back and felt his collarbones pop, he checked his phone to see
if he had any other notifications. There was one from Lottie about a TV show they were both
watching, but nothing else.

He was surprised there was nothing from Harry. It was a short flight back from Tennessee,
Harry should have been back in Gainesville by now. He tapped his finger on the desktop
thinking it through and decided to leave it for now.

He set another alarm and got back to work.

By the time the next one went off his eyes were sore and he had done over six hours of
uninterrupted work. When he checked his phone this time there was a message from Harry on
it from only fifteen minutes earlier.
Harry

Louis: let me know when you get

back to town
Harry: Sorry crashed when I got in.
I feel miserable 😔
Louis: let me bring you soup
Harry: You don’t have to do that
Louis: i know

He packed up his things while he waited for Harry to respond. Either way he needed a break
from the tiny study cubicle. He always felt like it started to smell when he was in there for
too long. Like the scent of him overworking himself could be palpable in the air. He’d even
had Liam come in for a whiff a couple of times, but he always laughed and told Louis he was
losing his mind.

He was locking the door behind him when Harry texted to agree and sent through his address.

It was a gorgeous day out and Louis walked back to his place slowly enjoying the sun on his
face. He hadn’t made soup for ages. The last time, he was pretty sure, was when Niall and Oli
came down with the flu their junior year. He’d been walking around the flat with his hoodie
pulled up over his nose ladling soup in bowls and throwing Mucinex at them.

Now the pair of them hailed it as magic.

Just over an hour later he pulled up directions to Harry’s flat, which was just on the cusp of
campus, about a fifteen minute walk away. After packing up the soup into a sealed
Tupperware container, he slipped it into his backpack and headed out.

When he arrived, he looked up at the three story complex, counting the buildings until he
spotted the exterior stairway with Harry’s flat number on the side. He took them to the
second floor and then looked for apartment 2-8.

He looked down to his phone. The last message he’d gotten from Harry was on his own walk
home and Louis was sure he’d fallen asleep again. He debated a minute about calling first,
but then decided to just knock.

It was a minute before the door pulled open. There was a tall man on the other side, much
taller than Harry, with a bright orange UF Swim t-shirt and a shock of white blond hair
standing in all directions on his head. Over his shoulder Louis could see a video game paused
on the TV.

“Yeah?” he said, his voice accented from somewhere Louis couldn’t place.

“Is Harry here?”

“I think he’s passed out,” the guy said, but opened the door to let Louis in. “What’s your
name?”
He opened his mouth to speak, but before he could someone else said his name.

“Louis?”

He looked over to see one of the guys he’d met in the dining hall with Harry back in
September standing in the open plan kitchen. He had a bagel in front of him heaped with
cream cheese and a shake in his hand. Louis was almost certain his name was Mike.

“Yeah,” he said, giving him a short wave. “How’s it going, mate?”

“Not bad, you? Haven’t seen you around in ages.”

The blond guy who opened the door looked at the pair of them a bit strangely before going
back to the couch.

“Doing alright, busy, y’know?”

Mike nodded then pointed at the other guy. “This is Johannes. Louis is on the golf team.”

Johannes waved, but was already restarting his game. Louis bit his lip and then made a
decision.

He forced a laugh out and said, “Nah, mate I’m not actually on the golf team. Bit of a running
gag between me and Harry, that. Got a bit out of hand I think. I’m actually at the law school.”

Mike’s face looked confused, but he was smiling through it. “Oh, yeah, that sounds funny.”

“It honestly wasn’t really, but you know how it is.” He waved his hand for emphasis and then
winced internally at the flamboyancy in the movement.

Mike nodded and then pointed down the hall. “Harry’s in the last door on the left, but I think
he’s asleep. He woke up with a nasty cold.”

Louis nodded. He wondered if they were expecting him to explain himself, say why he was
there or how Harry and him really knew each other. But he didn’t and he wasn’t going to.
“Thanks, mate. See you around.”

He didn’t look back at Harry’s roommates as he went and knocked lightly on Harry’s door
before pushing it open. Waiting for a response seemed futile, as he was fairly certain Harry
was unconscious.

The room was bigger than he expected, with a large bed in the middle of it. The space was
perfectly clean except for his duffle bag dropped right at the foot of his dresser and the shoes
he’d likely been wearing lined up next to it. So neat it was almost comically in contrast to his
own.

On the bed, Harry was asleep on his stomach. A shock of dark hair was spilling on his pillow,
starkly contrasting the white duvet where it was pulled high over his shoulders. Louis toed
his shoes off next to Harry’s and walked over the plush carpet. There was a sparse amount of
furniture in the room, just the bed, a bedside table, and a dresser with a TV on the wall over
it. Nothing even hung on the walls.

Two doors were on the far wall. One of them was cracked and he could see clothes hung up
inside and the other, he guessed, had to be the ensuite.

Little snuffles brought him closer to the bed and he could see Harry’s face tucked into the
pillow peacefully in sleep. His nose was bright red from irritation and on the bedside table sat
a limp, used tissue. The cord for his phone snaked under the covers and when Louis pushed
them back to pet gently at Harry’s hair, he could see Harry was clutching his phone tightly.

A thrill ran through him. What was he so afraid to miss? Was Harry holding onto it in case
Louis texted or called?

He ran his fingers through Harry’s hair for a minute or so before his nose twitched and his
fingers clenched on the phone.

Quietly, Louis said, “Good morning, sunshine.”

Harry sniffed and then coughed shallowly. The phone dropped from his fingers to the bed and
then he snaked his arm out and wrapped his hand around the back of Louis’ leg right below
the bottom of his shorts. His palm was hot against Louis’ bare skin, in such a contrast to the
air con pumping in the room, that he had goosebumps rising on his skin.

“How’re you feeling?”

Harry swallowed heavily and then turned slightly, his hand still holding onto Louis, and
opened his eyes. His lids hung low with sleep and his eyes looked almost dull with illness.

“Miserable,” Harry groaned, the word a bit nasally already.

“I brought you soup.” He pulled his bag off his shoulder and propped it on the edge of the
mattress to unzip it. The tupperware container was still hot when he pulled it out together
with a spoon he'd packed from their kitchen. He placed them both on Harry’s bedside table.

The duvet pooled around his waist as he sat up, framing his shirtless torso. His shoulders
were slumped forward though and he sneezed loudly into the curve of his elbow before
shaking his head as if to rid it of the cold.

Harry grabbed the container off the table and then just held it in his hands as he looked at it.

“You made this?” A look of awe crossed his face like he could hardly believe it.

“Yeah, of course. What’d you think I meant?” He shuffled on his feet, almost uncertain about
it after all, before he thought ‘fuck it’ and pulled out the crackers he’d packed as well as a
blue Gatorade.

“Blue is my favorite,” Harry said, grinning at him.

“Well,” Louis said, but didn’t continue. He didn’t know that, hadn’t know that. It was just the
only flavor he had at his place. And if Harry had left one half filled on his kitchen counter
weeks ago and Louis went and bought more that surely meant nothing.

“Do you wanna stay?”

Harry had an open, sleepy look on his face. Around his body were all the things Louis had
brought for him. Maybe it was overkill, maybe he was too much, but Harry didn’t seem to
think so.

“Do you pinky promise not to get me sick?”

In lieu of a verbal answer, Harry held out his pinky and Louis linked his own with it for a
second, lips curving into a smile.

Louis walked around to the other side of the bed and slipped in under the duvet, which was
warm underneath from Harry’s overheated body. The covers jumped as Harry rearranged his
legs and then he cracked open the lid of the container to sniff at the soup.

“This smells really good.”

Louis didn’t respond, just adjusted the blanket over him and felt his cheeks pinken.

“Is there only one spoon?” Harry asked. He looked over to see the spoon he’d brought poised
over the top of it, but not yet dipping in.

Louis huffed a laugh. “I don’t need any.”

Harry’s lips pouted out and Louis rolled his eyes in response.

“It’s also a huge recipe. I forgot that until I had about half the soup left after I filled that.” He
nodded towards the Tupperware in Harry’s hand. “So, I have some at home for later.”

“Alright, if you’re sure.” Harry turned to look at him for a moment and Louis was unsure
what the emotion crossing his face meant. There was a moment where Louis thought he was
about to say something that was going to surprise him. Instead, he said, “Do you wanna
watch something?”

“Sure.” He settled back against the pillows on his side of the bed and Harry turned the TV on.
Harry had Hulu pulled up and was part way through an episode of The Bear.

Louis was barely watching, mostly soaking up Harry’s presence and looking around his
room. It hardly felt like Harry at all in there; more like a hotel room than anything else.

“It’s really good,” Harry said, licking his lips as he swallowed. “Never really had this with
rice, but it’s almost better.”

A smile twitched on Louis’ lips. “I used to make it for my sisters, but Fizzy hates noodles. I
had to change the recipe around.”
“She hates… noodles?”

“I know, she’s basically a serial killer.”

Harry snorted and then his body shook with a cough. Louis patted him gently on the back and
when the cough died down he changed to just rubbing in a gentle circle.

He sat with Harry while he finished eating, while he sank low under the covers and while his
eyes drifted closed. It wasn’t until Harry had quietly snored though a whole episode of the
show that Louis got up to leave.

The mattress shifted as he stood and Harry let out a pitiful sounding whine.

“You leaving?”

Louis looked over his shoulder and saw Harry twisted on the bed to look at him.

“Not if you want me to stay?”

The three roommates outside Harry’s door were on his mind. He wasn’t sure how nosy they
were, how much Harry cared what they thought. Nothing was going to happen between them
tonight other than sleeping and maybe a cuddle, but everyone surely knew there was only one
place for someone to sleep in here and it was Harry’s bed.

Harry nodded down at the place in bed Louis had just left. “Stay.”

Louis bit his lip as he smiled and slipped back under the duvet.

Harry got better slowly and then all at once. He’d taken to calling Louis’ soup magic along
with his friends, but Harry’s words had his cheeks heating in ways Oli’s never had before.
Somehow, Louis never got sick, despite seeing Harry more than once while he was still
sniffling and hacking up a lung.

He was feeling healthy again just in time for a big meet up in Georgia. Harry left on Tuesday
morning to drive to Athens and Louis watched the three days of races on his laptop while he
worked on his study guides. The semester was so close to being over he was starting to feel
ill about it.

On Sunday Harry came crashing into Louis’ bedroom fresh from the bus, dropping his duffel
bag with a thunk in front of Louis’ wardrobe and falling face first onto his bed. The whole
thing shifted underneath him and Louis’ laptop swayed precariously on his lap where he’d
been typing up notes.

“Rough trip, sunshine?”

“I’m so tired.” The duvet tugged off Louis’ legs as Harry curled it up and hugged it between
his arms.

They had texted throughout the week while he was gone. Harry swam great, he didn’t always
win, but his times were improving. Not that Louis was keeping track of his times on a memo
on his desktop or anything.

“Take a nap,” Louis said, nudging him softly in the side with his toes.

Harry hummed, but pulled his legs up. It was like he was an oversized cat curled up on the
edge of his bed, napping in the late afternoon sun streaming through his window.

Harry dozed quietly while Louis worked on his laptop. He wasn’t at all paying attention
when his phone started to ring. Looking down to where it was on the bed, he saw it was Niall
and Oli for their Sunday FaceTime call. He’d totally lost track of time and had meant to
postpone when Harry said he was coming by.

He pushed his Airpods in and answered the call, eyeing Harry still sleeping over the top of
his phone.

“Hey guys,” Louis whispered, settling back against his headboard.

“Why are you whispering?” Niall practically yelled. Oli winced and Louis’ mouth twitched
as he held back a laugh.

“None of your business.” Louis flicked his fringe and Niall pulled the screen close to his face
so nearly the whole thing was taken up by his nose. Like he was looking for what Louis was
hiding. “Oli, how is school?”

On screen, Oli’s whole face scrunched in disgust and he began a long, winding tale of his
week. Louis listened, but couldn’t keep his eyes from flicking over the top of his phone to
Harry. His shirt had twisted on his torso, a bit of skin peeking out at his hips and he was
drooling a little on the arm he’d pushed under his head.

“In other news, I hate Luke slightly less now,” Oli was saying. Louis’ eyes were still on
Harry even as he listened to his friend. “He did actually lend me those notes I’d asked him
for and he takes notes like you do, Lou.”

“Like an insane person, you mean?” Niall said, snickering.

“Oi!” Louis snapped. “Those notes got you both through your American History class, so you
can fuck right off.”

Both his friends reeled back in a forceful laughter and Louis huffed at them. They loved to
poke fun at how intensely he studied, like it was a game to see which one could piss him off
first. And he loved them for it.

“Oh, thank you so much Louis. I could just kiss your feet with how you saved my life,” Niall
simpered, but broke on the very last word into giggles.
Louis raised a middle finger at the camera, but he was silently laughing at them.

“Whatever. What’s up with the work retreat, Ni? Last you said was that it was a maybe for
next month.”

Niall signed so loudly he thought he could feel it through the phone.

“It’s booked for the week before Christmas,” he said through gritted teeth. “Jessica is still
pushing for pairing with your desk mate and Cheyanne backed her up on it. I need to start an
anonymous smear campaign to stop it at this point.”

“Might as well put that poli sci minor to use,” Oli reasoned. “I mean you only did it to begin
with because you wanted to show that guy from our hall freshman year that you were a better
student than him. You should let your spite fuel you further.”

Louis hid a laugh behind his wrist, but Niall snapped his fingers twice and said, “You know
what, you’re exactly right. It’s like I forgot where I came from, who I really am.”

“Controlling and mean on the tough Boston streets?” Oli asked, with his brows scrunched.

Niall nodded and added, “But a freak in the sheets.”

Louis snorted at the same time as Oli said, “Only if it’s Google Sheets.”

They locked eyes over the phone and then sputtered out laughter. Niall called out, “Hey!” but
they both ignored him.

Louis and Oli met in an air high five over the phone and Niall pouted with his arms crossed.

“Whatever, does that mean you don’t want to help or what?”

“Oh, no, I’ll help with your smear campaign,” Louis said.

“Sounds like fun.” Oli shot them a grin. “Could use a distraction, to be honest.”

“Speaking of distractions,” Niall started and then stared right at the phone like he was waiting
on Louis to react. The ceiling was such an interesting place to look at, it’s not like he was
avoiding Niall’s gaze or anything. Niall sighed and asked, “How’s your swimmer?”

Louis’ eyes skipped over the top of his phone again to Harry, still asleep on the end of his
bed. He had rolled over onto his back and his hair was now flopping everywhere as he
punched short breaths out of his lungs.

“Fine.”

Oli had his eyes narrowed at him when he looked back to his screen.

“What were you looking at?”

“Hm?”
“Louis, you have a look on your face like David Beckham is in the room with you.”

“Like those cannolis from the place near my nan’s are in your room.”

“Like you have a stack of Book Awards sitting in your room.”

“Like the hottest man you’ve ever-” Niall stopped himself with a gasp and Louis pressed his
lips together, his eyes going wide. “Harry Styles is in your room isn’t he.”

“Nooo,” Louis said, like a liar.

Both of his friends’ jaws dropped and Louis couldn’t help letting out a loud cackle. Harry
stirred on the bed and he slapped a hand over his mouth to muffle the sound.

“Flip the screen!” Niall shouted, bouncing in his chair. “You little slut, I can’t believe he was
there all along.”

Louis gave him a glare, but flipped his screen for two whole seconds for his friends to catch
an eyeful before he turned it back.

“Alright, he’s cute. I’ll give you that,” Oli reasoned.

Niall nodded, then added, “Did you knock him out? Drug him?”

“Fuck off,” Louis said on a laugh. “Also, can we dial it back for a second. It’s really rude to
mention the Italian bakery when I’m not even coming for Thanksgiving this year. Way to rub
salt in the wound.”

Niall winced. “You’re right, that was callous of me.”

“I cannot wait for Thanksgiving break this year - lying on the couch for three days straight
while my dad yells at the TV and my mom hands me bowls of mashed potatoes? I think that’s
heaven,” Oli said dreamily.

Louis rolled his eyes.

“My Aunt Clarice is making six pies this year,” Niall boasted. “Six, can you believe it?”

Louis flipped him off and shifted his legs on the mattress, accidentally bumping into Harry’s
thigh.

“No I can’t believe it, Ni, but you’re still rubbing it in.”

Niall’s face pulled wide in an exaggerated grimace and Louis couldn’t help the puff of
laughter that punched out of him.

“So what are your plans for Thanksgiving this year?” Niall asked. “I’m not going to lie, I’ve
gotten more than a few annoyed texts that you weren’t coming.”

A smile pulled across his face. “Your cousin Sammy is obsessed with me.”
Niall sighed heavily. “It wasn’t just her. The most disturbing was Grandpa Joe. He mentioned
your ‘effervescence’.”

Niall put air quotes around the word and his face went sour as he said it. The bed shook
underneath Louis as laughter wracked his body. By the time he calmed slightly he was
slumped further against the headboard and had to clutch his chest around his haggard
breathing.

“I love that man.” His voice was full of glee. “He offered me a thousand dollars to marry you
once, did I tell you that?”

Niall guffawed loudly, but Oli was giggling so loudly it drowned out the sound.

“I’m worth way more than a grand,” Niall protested.

Louis nodded, “It’s the only reason I rejected it, honest. Hand to God.”

“Never mind, I’m glad you’re not coming.” Niall’s words were teasing, but he could see in
his face on the screen that he didn’t mean it. “Don’t think I didn’t notice you avoided the
question.”

Louis rolled his eyes.

“My thanksgiving plans are-” he started and then lifted his other hand so he could count them
off on his fingers, “- One, studying. Two, revising. Three, buy pumpkin pie from Publix.”

“That’s the saddest thing I’ve ever heard,” Oli said.

“It’s at least on par with you watching your dad yell at the TV. Your thing might even be
sadder.”

Oli was shaking his head like he wanted to argue. Louis opened his mouth to continue
ragging on him when he felt a light touch to his ankle.

He looked over the top of his phone. Oli was saying something, but he wasn’t sure what.
There were two fingers pressed to his ankle bone, curving delicately around it in a slow semi
circle before falling back to the bed. Harry was looking up at him with a sleepy smile on his
face that was cut short by a big yawn.

Louis blinked several times and finally looked back to his phone, but his mind was still stuck
on Harry. Both of his friends had stopped speaking and were looking at him curiously. He felt
himself blush under their knowing gazes.

“Oh!” he said, a mock sort of startled lilt to his voice. “Wow, look at the time. I have…
things.”

“Oh, things. Okay, sure,” Oli teased.

“Mr. Wonderful must have woken up.”

“Fuck you, love you, bye.” Louis tapped the end call button and dropped his phone to the
bed. The Airpods case snapped closed when he pushed the buds back inside and then I was
just him and Harry in the room.

“Sorry if I woke you,” Louis said.

“It’s fine,” Harry said, still smiling. “You’re funny with your friends.”

The pink on his cheeks deepened under the words. “I know it’s shocking to find out I have
some.”

Harry laughed and then pushed aside his laptop and replaced it with his body in Louis’ lap. It
was a pleasant weight, Harry’s head on his thigh. His fingers pushed up Louis’ shirt to press
against his belly, tickling along the waistband of his gym shorts.

“Nah, could never be surprising to find out other people are obsessed with you. I mean, I get
it.”

Louis smiled down at him and knew his face was doing the fond thing it liked to do. The
whole, eyes crinkling, lips pinching, I can’t believe the person in front of me exists, thing.

“Niall’s grandpa thinks I’m effervescent.”

Harry let out a short, sharp laugh. “Sounds about right.”

“Oh, you,” Louis said in a mock sort of humble way. There were a lot of compliments being
piled onto him in a short time and he wasn’t entirely sure what to do with them all.

Harry lightly kissed the skin he’d revealed on Louis’ abdomen, tickling him there. It should
have sent him squirming away, but instead he leaned into it. Loved it.

“Were you saying you’re staying here for Thanksgiving break?”

Louis hummed and ran a hand through Harry’s hair. “Too short and too broke to fly
anywhere, plus it’s not like it’s a holiday I really celebrate.”

“Come home with me.”

Louis’ eyes shot to Harry’s in surprise.

“To your-” Louis started then swallowed sharply. “To your family’s?”

“Yeah, I usually, well, that is I always, invite the international students on the swim team, so
usually I’m bringing at least one stray home with me. But everyone has plans this year
already.”

He looked like he meant it, not like it was something offered out of pity. Louis scanned his
face for a minute just to be certain.

“That would be really nice,” he finally settled on.

Harry’s whole face bloomed in satisfaction at his words. He’d been smiling before, but
somehow it didn’t seem possible when it all grew wider, his dimples sunk deeper, his lashes
fanned his cheeks from how high they were and a lovely flush settled over him. Louis
pressed a thumb into his dimple and wiggled it for a moment with his tongue between his
teeth.

“And hey,” Harry started, turning onto his stomach so he could look up and face Louis. “I get
to take you to the beach like I promised.”

It took Louis a moment to remember. That very first day - the very first hour - Harry had,
what he thought to be jokingly, offered to show him the beaches since Louis had never been.
There was a rushing in his ears and a cold wave crashed down his spine. Like a premonition,
like a case of déjà vu. He’d felt in those very first moments that he’d do anything to keep
seeing Harry, to keep Harry’s hands on him and here they were more than two months later -
Harry’s hands on his stomach, Louis’ fingers tangled in his hair.

Was it fate, was it the right place at the right time? Who could say, but what was certain was
that it had been two and a half months and Harry remembered.

“I can’t wait.”

They left Wednesday morning. Harry had convinced him to stay the night as he had an early
practice and that way they could leave right from there when it was over. It’s not as if he had
to twist Louis’ arm or anything. He’d slunk into Harry’s bedroom the night before while his
roommates were asleep and promised to give Harry a blowjob only if he stayed quiet through
the whole thing.

Harry very nearly made it too, but he moaned long and low when Louis tugged at his balls
causing Louis to pull off, wipe his mouth and tuck Harry back into his briefs.

Seeing the hunger in Harry’s eyes had been nearly as good as getting off, the pout on his lips
all the way until they left.

Harry’s family home in Jupiter was a four hour drive south.They spent it discovering they
both loved the same pop punk band out of Boston, who Louis had seen a handful of times
live, and belted their discography together the whole way. Harry had an incredible voice,
hitting each high note with ease and blushing when Louis complimented him.

“We sound really good together though,” Harry said, smiling over at him with one hand on
the wheel.

“Maybe it’s a sign to take this show on the road.” Louis looked at the highway in front of
them through the windshield and added, “A different road, that is.”
Harry honked a laugh so loud he nearly missed their exit.

Barely five minutes after they exited the turnpike, they were pulling into a gated subdivision.

Louis watched out the window as they drove by a series of large homes in varying shades of
pastels. Jupiter looked nothing like where he’d grown up, so startlingly different from the
squat brick homes of Doncaster, or the homes in Boston where he’d gone to uni. After one
more turn, Harry pulled into a driveway next to a little sports car with the top down.

“Gemma must already be here,” Harry said, looking towards the car. “I think you’ll like her.”

Louis nodded and wondered if it mattered if they liked him. Like, it mattered to him, but did
it matter to Harry, too?

“Who all is going to be here again?” His seat belt retracted with a whoosh when he
unbuckled it.

“Right now? Should just be Gems and my mom. I think my step-dad, Robin, is still at work.”
Harry turned the car off and turned to look at him. “Tomorrow my Aunt and her kids, who are
five and seven, and then my grandpa. We don’t have too big of a family.”

Louis nodded. There had been a tight bubble of nerves in his chest since Harry had asked him
to come. They’d only known each other in one setting, one version of each other. So, this was
different, wasn’t it? He’d see where Harry grew up, the people who made him. It was a step
further and maybe it wasn’t meant to mean anything at all, but it did have Louis wondering.

“That’s my prime demographic actually, kids and grandpas.”

Harry laughed as he opened the car door, both of them climbing out to grab their bags before
walking towards the front door.

Harry pushed it open and then they were in a short entry way. Louis could see the whole of
the house from where he was standing - one level in a full open plan, with a couple hallways
shooting off on opposite sides. Through the long walls of glass doors on the back of the
living room he could see a pool glittering in the sun.

From the kitchen, on the far side of the room, a woman with dark hair was moving towards
them. Though she looked quite young, it had to be Harry’s mum. They looked scarily alike.

“My baby,” she called, with her arms already spread wide.

“Hi mom,” Harry mumbled out and wrapped her in a big hug, even lifting her off her feet as
she laughed into his shoulder.

When they pulled apart, Harry turned to him and said, “This is my friend Louis from school.
He’s English.”

Louis nearly snorted at the tag on. Like it wasn’t about to be obvious when he spoke.
Harry’s mom turned to him. Her face was so similar to Harry’s, but her eyes were a murky
blue where Harry’s were such a clear green.

“Thank you so much for having me,” Louis said, ready to shake her hand, but instead she
pulled him in for a loose hug.

“Oh, isn’t that just the most darling accent,” she said, gripping his arms and introducing
herself as Mrs. Twist, before letting him go. To Harry, she said, “I’ve got the rooms all made
up for you and your friend. I think your sister is just in the shower, Harry, but she’ll be happy
to see you.”

“Great, thanks mom.”

His mum headed back to the kitchen and Harry directed them to the short hallway behind
him. There were four doors, two of which were close, and Louis could hear the shower
running behind one of them. The last door on the left was where Harry led him.

In the center of the starkly white room was a double bed with a large, generic painting of the
beach above it.

“Well, here’s the guest room.” Harry gestured broadly and it was so awkward that Louis
huffed out a laugh.

The bed bounced under his bag when he tossed it on top. “Thanks, sunshine.”

Wincing, he regretted the word immediately, although Harry just rolled his eyes. He’d gotten
so comfortable calling Harry nicknames and pet names, but he didn’t want to make him
uncomfortable here with his family.

“I’m going to do better at that,” Louis said resolutely.

“Sure, Lou.” Nudging him with his elbow, Harry said, “I’m going to go put this down.”

He nodded towards his suitcase and Louis followed him out of the room into the one next
door. It was painted in the same flat white as the guest room, but it was filled with so many
things that screamed Harry.

Several swimming posters were on the walls, along with photos of friends and family
scattered about. Above the desk was a shelf so full of trophies and medals and ribbons that it
looked like it was bowing in the middle.

The space was such a stark contrast from Harry’s room at UF, which had about as much
personality as the guest room next door. Like it could belong to anyone.

He was taking it all in and by the time he turned back to Harry he was already staring at him.

“Feels like you in here,” Louis finally said, shrugging. “Your flat feels like a hotel room.”

Harry’s jaw dropped in outrage, but quickly morphed into a smile. “Whatever.”
He dropped his suitcase at the foot of the bed and then started to unpack it. Louis watched
him curiously for a minute before finally speaking.

“Do you think I should start unpacking as well?”

“My mom would have a stroke if she saw the way you ‘put your clothes away’.” He added
air quotes around the last bit of the sentence and Louis let out a surprised laugh.

“I’ll have you know I’m extremely organized. I know exactly where everything is.”

“I think I’ve lost half my underwear in your room,” Harry said, lowering his voice when he
said underwear like it was something illicit.

“It’s not lost,” Louis protested. “It’s just adding a little something special to the decor.”

Harry made an unimpressed face, but Louis stepped closer to him anyway, tugging lightly on
the waistband of his shorts.

“Maybe I want to see what you’ll do if you run out.”

Harry’s eyes were on Louis’ mouth as he spoke, tracking the way his lips moved, the way his
tongue peeked out between his teeth. The distance between them closed as if they were both
swaying forward from the magnetic force field between them. But then, Harry gulped, looked
towards the empty hallway, and turned back to his clothes. In the bathroom next door, the
shower cut off, but the door didn’t open.

Louis dropped his hand from where his fingers were still tucked against the warm skin of
Harry’s abdomen. It didn’t bother him, Harry turning away. This was a thing for the two of
them, not for everyone else.

“So, what’s the plan then?” Louis asked and Harry’s brows wrinkled as he re-folded a t-shirt.
“For the rest of the day, I mean.”

“I think my mom made a dinner reservation, but it won’t be for a couple of hours.”

“Is it rude if I study?” The tile floor was hard underneath his feet as he shifted on it. “Reading
week starts when we get back and I think it’d be an understatement to say I’m a bit stressed.”

“No, of course not Lou.” Harry gave him a warm smile. “I’ll join you, we can work on the
table outside. You spend too much time locked in the library.”

Louis wanted to lean in to kiss him, just a quick one to his cheek so he could breathe in the
scent of Harry’s skin and feel the barest brush of stubble against his lips. But the door to the
bathroom opened with a rattle and a bang so Louis swallowed the urge down.

They had dinner that night at a restaurant on the intercoastal called Guanabanas. All of them
were tipsy on tequila, messily sharing their food. Dishes of shrimp, salmon, and grouper were
passed from plate to plate. Harry’s family were a riot together, they spoke over each other,
poked fun at one another, and then laughed at themselves. It was like they had a dozen and a
half bits they’d been rehearsing for all their lives and were a little production on their own.

It was fascinating to watch. He’d only seen Harry really interact with other people a handful
of times and he’d never been like this.

At school, he was always more reserved and now Louis wondered if he was uncomfortable.
He’d be quiet, polite when they were in the library and burst into himself the moment they
left. Even when he was with his friends he seemed to be the same. Like there were two sides
of himself that didn’t fully bleed into each other.

“Louis,” Harry’s mum asked, sitting back in her chair with a Margarita tipping precariously
in her hand. “What made you come to the US?”

Wiping his face with a napkin, he swallowed the last of his bite of pasta. “My mum is
actually American. My grandparents moved to England when she was in high school. So I
don’t know, I guess I was always curious.”

Under the table his fingers twisted together around the truth.

“Was she from around here?”

“No, she grew up on a hobby farm in Pennsylvania, but my grandad got transferred for
work.” He shrugged, cutting just to the root of it all. “It all worked out in the end I guess. My
grandparents stayed in England after he retired and my mum’s never wanted to come back.
None of my sisters are all that interested beyond Disney World either,” he added, taking a
laugh at the end.

“Oh, do you have a big family?” she asked. Next to him, Harry and Gemma were giggling
together over something he hadn’t heard and Harry’s step dad was watching the boats pass by
on the intercoastal.

“I’m the oldest of seven.” He took a sip of his drink and could hardly feel the burn on the
way down anymore. The alcohol was starting to make his lips go a bit numb.

Her eyes bugged out of her head comically and he giggled into his margarita.

“Your poor mother.” Louis realized she had the same exact laugh as Harry. That honking,
belly shaking, eyes closed laugh that he loved to listen to.

“Eh, she’s alright. She keeps having them so she must not mind. The youngest are only two.”

“Oh my.” She waved a hand in front of her face like the thought alone was overwhelming.
“How old are you? That must be quite the age gap.”

“I turn twenty-three next month. My birthday is on Christmas Eve.”

“Is it really?” Harry asked next to him, finally turning his attention away from Gemma.
Louis hummed in response. “When I was small I thought all the Christmas lights were for
me.”

After he said it, his whole face flamed in a blush. Harry and his mum were looking at Louis
with twin, soft looks. Like they thought he was unbearably cute and they couldn’t turn away.

He ducked his head and took another bite of his food, hoping the spice of the seasoning
would overtake the burn in his cheeks.

Gemma leaned over Harry, her elbow on the table rattling the silverware and a smirk on her
face. “How did you meet Harry again?”

“At a football game,” Louis said and then chuckled. The way the last couple months had
tumbled forward from then had him hardly believing where they even were right now. “It was
my first time watching American football ever and Harry was sitting in the seat next to me.
Explained the whole game to me.”

Gemma’s brows lifted, her lips pursing, like she was sussing something out. But before she
could speak, Mrs. Twist did instead.

“Harry played pee-wee football, did you know?” She had the fondest sort of look on her face.
“The most darling thing, but he was God awful at it.”

Gemma let out a loud peel of laughter and Harry whined out, “Hey!”

“It was painful to watch, but I have it on tape if you want to see.”

Gemma was still giggling into her wrist, the glass in her hand shaking from it and Louis
couldn’t help picturing Harry in that little uniform on a field making a disaster of himself.

“With my knowledge and understanding of the football game, I feel like I should be a lot
better at football,” Harry said very seriously and then the entire table broke down into
laughter. Gemma messed up his hair and he pushed her off with a loud, tipsy squawk.

Much later the five of them returned back to Harry’s house and went off to bed. Harry
lingered outside the guest room door while Louis slowly peeled off his shoes and socks and t-
shirt.

“I was thinking of going to the beach in the morning before the parade if you wanted to
come?” he asked, his eyes raking over Louis’ exposed chest hungrily.

“Sure.” He’d say yes to almost anything with Harry looking at him like that.

Harry stood in the doorway for a second longer as Louis teased at the button to his shorts.
The door to Gemma’s room whipped open, echoing loudly down the hall, and Harry all but
jumped back.

“Good night,” he said, hurriedly and stepped firmly into the hallway and disappeared.
Louis couldn’t help but smirk at the blush lingering behind as he fled, like a stamp in the air,
a gust of heat rushing through the corridor.

Harry woke him the next morning with cold fingertips on his cheek. It should have been
startling, but maybe his body recognized Harry’s touch. Waking slowly, he turned to kiss
Harry’s fingers sloppily before slipping out of bed to the sound of Harry huffing a laugh.
Sleepily, he took in Harry, already dressed in swim shorts and a t- shirt with his feet bare
against the tile.

Louis fumbled blearily through his bag until he found the bathing suit he’d packed last
minute. The day before they left, Harry had mentioned his family had a pool and Louis had
gone hunting for his swim shorts, not even sure he owned any. And then he’d very nearly
forgotten them anyway, doubling back to grab them where he’d abandoned them on his bed.

He undressed slowly, not intending for it to be sexy, but simply out of tiredness. Still, Harry’s
eyes tracked his movements and when he bent to pull on the swim shorts Harry let out a low
whine in the back of his throat. Louis smirked and tugged them up. They were a bit tight,
which was why he’d bought them, but it was even better now to see Harry’s eyes absolutely
stuck to the curve of his arse.

“Ready, sunshine?” He curved a hand around Harry’s elbow and very nearly leaned in to kiss
him on the lips. The rest of the house was quiet, but he didn’t want to push Harry’s
boundaries.

“Yeah,” Harry said, swallowing hard around the word. Shaking his head as if to clear it, the
curls flopped everywhere, and he added, “I just need to grab my board.”

“Your board?”

No more than five minutes down the road once they left Harry’s subdivision was the public
beach parking, which was mostly empty as the sky was only just starting to lighten from inky
black. Louis looked through the windshield at the beach, watching as the ocean curled onto
the sand in the low lighting and taking in the faint scent of salt already hanging in the air.

He’d not grown up by the sea, but they used to go when he was young. Especially before his
sisters were born. Foggy memories of his mum packing him into the car with a cooler and the
scratchy towels from ASDA rushing back to him now. They’d drive out to Scarborough or
Whitby, sometimes even just go sit in the car at Grimsby breathing in the salt air like he was
now.
The car door slammed when Harry got out, startling him out of his thoughts. He climbed out
after him and watched as Harry tugged the surfboard out of the back. A towel was slung over
his shoulder and Louis snatched a second one out of the basket Harry kept in his trunk.

They walked towards the beach in a steady quiet, just the distant sound of waves between
them. It was a cool morning and Louis was glad he’d tugged a sweatshirt on at the last
minute when they’d left Harry’s. When the sun finally rose, it would surely warm up, but as
of right now the first rays of light were just barely flirting with the horizon line.

Kicking off his shoes just as they reached the sand, he trudged through it after Harry towards
the ocean.

“How long have you surfed?”

Harry turned to him over his shoulder with a look on his face Louis had never seen before. A
bit pinched in, but calm. Louis remembered Harry saying how much he loved the water when
they first met and now he wondered if it could ever be overwhelming to have something so
big, so beautiful, so volatile be your first love.

“Since always, I guess.” Harry’s voice had taken on a bit of a strange tone to match his face.
“I hardly remember learning.”

Louis hummed and they stopped close to the shore line. Harry put his board down along with
his towel before pulling off his shirt. It never did get boring watching him take off his
clothes.

“Are you coming in?” Harry asked, stretching his back.

“In a bit.” Louis tucked his fingers into the sleeves over his hoodie and breathed in. It was
one of Harry’s that he’d left at Louis’ place a month or so ago now. Tossed into the perilous
pit of his bedroom floor and fished out by Louis a week later when he was looking for
something to wear on a chilly morning. It had still smelled like him then and Louis had
tucked his nose into the collar for his whole walk to school.

The first time Harry had seen him wear it he’d kissed his neck, tugging on the draw strings
and it had felt like permission. So he’d kept it.

“Sun should be up soon,” Harry offered, picking his board back up and turning back towards
the water.

“I wanna watch you anyway.”

Harry smiled over to him, the odd look on his face melting. Just as the first rays of sunshine
crested the horizon line, he started towards the water.

Laying his towel down on the sand, Louis sat atop it, leaning back on his hands as he
watched Harry go into the water. He’d never had an interest in surfing before and had
definitely never seen anyone do it right in front of him. But Harry was beautiful in the water,
as always. It was fascinating to watch the board slice through the water. The sun was cutting
across the waves in hot red pink and yellow bursts and it almost looked like Harry was
skimming across something different, something other than water.

When everything in front of him was bathed in a stinging pink glow he snapped a photo to
add to his Instagram stories. Just his bare legs with the beach underneath them and the sun on
the water with a small, mostly blurry Harry riding a wave on the right side.

It was only a minute later that Oli replied to his story with, “Is this a soft launch or?”

He laughed to himself and didn’t respond, instead choosing to watch as Harry coasted in on a
wave that broke too soon. Louis hid a laugh behind his wrist when Harry fell off the board
with flailing limbs. When he popped out of the water, Harry’s hair was in his eyes and he had
a pout on his face.

The sun had risen higher in the sky now, the bright colors dimming to pastels, as Harry
walked towards him looking like something out of a dream, a romance novel, an Austen film.
Stunning, heroic, water dripping down his chest and his damp hair pushed back with a lazy,
pleased smile on his face. His whole body bathed in honey rose tinted light.

“How’s the water?” Louis asked, looking up at him.

“Come in with me.” Harry put his board on the beach and held a hand out to Louis. “Please?”

Louis slipped his hand into Harry’s and let himself be hauled up with cool, damp fingers, the
barest grit of the sand clinging to them. He yanked off his hoodie and dropped it onto his
towel before carefully taking Harry’s hand again.

“Is this alright?” he asked, squeezing gently.

Harry hummed and then tugged him towards the water.

The first brush against his toes was cool, shockingly so, and he didn’t even have a moment to
think about it before Harry was pulling him in farther. First his ankles, then his knees, sinking
into the salt water until he was up to his belly button and then halfway up his chest.

They were still holding hands under the water and Louis smoothed his thumb over Harry’s
skin, just the lightest brush in the chilly water. Harry smiled at him, sinking down so his
collarbones brushed the surface. Louis let himself be moved with him so they were even in
the water and then shivered from the coldness on his skin.

Harry laughed and pulled him closer, his hands slipping around Louis’ waist, their feet
tangling under the water. It reminded him of that very first night in the pool, but then they’d
been in the dark, the water just a hushing kiss on their skin. Now they were in screaming
morning sunshine, the ocean cradling them as waves rolled past, and Harry cradling him in
his arms.

There were a few surfers farther down the beach, so small he could hardly see them, and it
felt like they were utterly alone.

Licking a spray of salt off his lips, Louis said, “I can see why you like it so much.”
Harry’s eyes tracked the movement and then looked up to meet Louis’. “Can you?”

Louis hummed feeling Harry’s fingers spread on his lower back. Any other time they’d be
hot to the touch, but now they were just a weight, like he couldn’t tell where Harry ended and
he began, just that he was there and they were connected.

The stress of finals, of going home, had been dragging him down for weeks, months even.
But here he was floating, here he was weightless.

“Feels freeing, doesn’t it?” He tipped his head back so the crown of it just brushed the
surface, dampening the hair.

“Yeah, it does,” Harry said, words nearly sounding like he was underwater, like they were far
away, even though he was right there.

He looked back up to him to see that same odd look on his face again.

“Alright, sunshine?”

Harry’s face turned towards the horizon line, the sun pouring into every fine line on his face,
pooling in his dimples and falling over his chin and neck. He was sunshine personified.

“Sometimes being back at the beach after a while makes me feel a certain type of way, I
guess,” Harry finally said.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Louis asked, so quietly he was almost certain it was carried
away on the sea breeze.

He watched Harry as he watched the water. His face was still, even, as the waves slowly
sloped by them. They were drifting a little, shore certainly farther away than it had once been.
But he wasn’t worried about that, only about the placid look in Harry’s eyes, the green of
them nearly blue with the water underneath him.

“The beach was always my dad’s thing,” Harry said eventually. Louis shuffled ever closer to
him. “It became our thing, me and him. We lived up in Volusia County when I was young and
he’d go to the beach any chance he had, escaping after work or for long weekends out to New
Smyrna Beach. I would always try to go with him, I loved being in the water from birth,
according to my mom. I have no memory of learning to swim at all, you know? It’s been a
part of me my whole life.”

“That sounds really nice,” Louis said carefully. He was trying to remember what he knew
about Harry’s dad and realized there was nothing. It was his step-dad, Robin, who had dinner
with them the night before.

“He died when I was eight,” Harry said, answering the question Louis hadn’t asked. “In a car
accident. Afterwards, it was like the ocean was the only place he was still alive. And then
swimming became the only way I could turn my brain off from, like, running through it all
over and over again.”
His hands slipped from Louis’ body to coast over the top of the water, rising and falling with
each push and pull of the current. Louis watched him, teeth biting into his lip and trying to
figure out what to say.

“It was really how I started swimming, like for a school team and then a club team. It was the
only thing I ever wanted to do, but my mom couldn’t drive to the beach every day. She’d go
weeks at a time without even wanting to look at it. It’s funny sometimes how the thing that
can bring you the most comfort is the same thing that hurts someone else. All we both saw
when we looked at the ocean was my dad, but she couldn’t stand it.”

Louis slipped his hands around Harry’s middle and held him from behind, hooking his chin
gently over Harry’s chin. They moved together slowly in the water, bobbing along at its pace,
to its whim.

“My mom remarried when I was eleven and that’s when we moved down the coast.” Louis
pressed in closer to him, the side of his face right against Harry’s cheek so he could feel him
from temple to chin. “I like Robin a lot, love him even, and he’s great for my mom, you
know?”

Louis nodded and felt a tear drip down Harry’s face, running down both their cheeks before
curving off Louis’ chin. Harry let out a sharp gasp.

“I know,” Louis said with certainty.

Harry nodded. “But he’s not my dad. He can never be my dad and it makes me feel like such
an ass to say that because he’s great and he makes my mom happy and Gemma loves him.
But I just… every time I look at the water I feel like I’m a kid, with floaties on my arms and
a boogie board underneath me. I can feel my dad’s hands on my shoulders and I hear his
laugh on the wind off the Atlantic, so palpable some days I think I can taste it on the air. Or
smell his aftershave in the salt drying on my skin when I leave. And it’s so hard to leave, hard
to move on, move past.”

Louis gave him a gentle squeeze and said, “I don’t think you have to. I think it’s really
special to have something that’s for the two of you. And it means a lot that you brought me
here.”

Harry’s hands slipped over his under the water. They floated in silence for a minute just
listening to the waves breaking and feeling the sun on their cheeks. Then Harry laughed,
cutting right through the peace between them. It was a sour sound, like whatever it was
wasn’t funny at all.

“Anyway, that’s my fucked up family.” He tried to move away, but Louis held on. “Sorry for,
like, dumping that.”

“No,” Louis protested. “Don’t apologize. I’m glad you told me. If anyone understands fucked
up families it’s me.”

Harry sank back into his chest like the words had settled something in him. “Oh, yeah?”
Louis didn’t like talking about growing up, about his family. But he’d do it then, he’d do it
for Harry.

“I never met my birth dad, you know? My mum got pregnant at seventeen and he just wasn’t
interested. It was really hard for her in the beginning. My grandparents are well off, but I
think they thought she was wasting her future so we bounced around a lot when I was little. I
remember it felt like an adventure going from, like, friend’s house to friend’s house. We were
a bit all over the place for a while. But then she met my step-dad Mark and they got married.
He was great and he adopted me. I called him dad and everything, but he was never really my
dad y’know? Especially when my four younger sisters came along. And then when they
divorced.”

Louis’ fingers played with the strings of Harry’s swimsuits on their own accord, just for
something to do. It sounded whimsical and romantic when he thought about it now - living a
nomadic life with his mum. But he knew it wasn’t, that they had little money and she had too
much pride to go back home. That when they’d escape to those beaches on the Yorkshire
coast they were always running from something. That every sandcastle they built together
always tipped precariously backwards until they toppled over.

“Spent most of my time raising those girls. And I love them to death, but I never want to go
back. I didn’t have time for anything, but being there for them and school. So I used uni as an
out and I cried the whole first month of my first year from how badly I missed them, but I
still knew I could never live that life again.”

“I’m sorry, Lou,” Harry whispered.

Louis shrugged with him still in his arm, both their bodies rising and falling with the motion.

“I guess I’m just saying, I get it. Families are complicated and hard sometimes or all the
time.” He let out a short, broken sounding laugh. “And sometimes the things that can feel the
most freeing are also the things that ground you in the past, or the present. Even show you the
way to your future.”

Harry’s eyelashes fluttered against Louis’ cheek as he closed them.

“It’s out and through,” Harry said, loosening in Louis’ arms. “It’s one stroke more, one kick.
It’s this right here.”

“Yeah, sunshine.”

“I can see it, Louis.”

When they left the water Louis thought he could feel the shift in them. Like the way the
weightlessness bled from their bodies left them standing in a different way. The same people,
the same stories, but a different something behind it. Or maybe it was just something had
altered within him, like holding Harry in his arms, having Harry’s tears drip down his own
face had changed the makeup of him.

Through Thanksgiving dinner and chasing Harry’s little cousins around, and while, at his
own insistence, he washed their dishes from dinner he thought about that.

And when he climbed into bed that night he was certain he could feel Harry’s heart beating
through the wall.

For the second morning in a row he was woken by the press of Harry’s cool fingertips to his
forehead before the sun had risen. The night before, he’d told Harry he’d go with him to
practice, but he was sluggish when he climbed out of bed with his eyes mostly closed. As he
was slowly tugging on shorts, Harry handed him a hoodie, not realizing until after it was on
that it was the same one he’d worn the day before, Harry’s.

He followed him to the kitchen and then leaned heavily against the stone counter top while
Harry made a protein shake and packed his bag. They were in the car five minutes later, his
own backpack between his feet, and Louis dozed the whole way there.

To his surprise when he followed Harry inside it was to a gym and not the pool.

“Dry land first,” Harry said and then gulped down half his drink.

Louis watched him stretch with the kind of dumb stare he only ever managed when he was
wasted or dead tired. By the time Harry was on the machines Louis was blinking awake and
got out a set of notes to review. It had been his idea to tag along, thinking that if Harry was
occupied and Louis had nothing else to do, it would allow him to really focus.

The problem with that was that Harry was occupied. Lifting things. His muscles flexing
under the poor fluorescent lighting had Louis so enraptured he could hardly focus on his Con
Law notes. Who gave a fuck about Judicial Reform when Harry was looking like that.

He did manage to get some work done and by the time Harry came to get a drink of water
Louis was just as thirsty.

“Looking good out there, Styles,” he said in his best impression of an American sports
announcer.

Harry snorted so hard water came out of his nose and sprayed onto the fabric of Louis’
shorts. Slapping a hand over his mouth, they both broke down in giggles. Louis waved off a
couple glares from people around the room, eyes only on the way Harry’s chest shook with
laughter, his eyes nearly closed. It was a far cry from how he’d been in tears in the ocean this
time yesterday.

By the time they moved to the pool the sun was cresting the horizon through the glass
windows. Harry slipped into the locker room to change into his speedo and Louis settled onto
the short bleachers they had on the side. With work back in his lap, he was doing his best to
focus when Harry walked to his side.
He had his protein drink out now, cap and goggles in one hand tangled around the cup, and a
pair of short fins wrapped with a stretchy band in the other.

“I just need to do some stretches first,” he said, chugging the dregs of his protein shake. He
put everything down next to Louis and he watched with bated breath as Harry twisted and
stretched his whole body. When he was done he jumped a couple of times and breathed
deeply, as if he was recentering himself on the pool deck.

Louis shook his head as he glanced back down to his notes. Maybe he’d be able to get
something done when Harry was in the water. But if he was being brutally honest, he never
could take his eyes off him in the pool either.

“Baby, sunshine, what time are you expecting to be done?” Louis asked and then frowned at
himself. “I’m not trying to rush you, just curious.”

Harry dropped the band next to Louis and grabbed his cap and goggles. “I’ve got to do, like,
five thousand meters. Probably an hour and a half. Sorry.”

Louis waved a hand. “I’ve got enough work to sit here all day, I was just wondering.”

Harry smiled at him, his eyes already hidden behind his goggles and his hair and ears tucked
into the cap.

“You look like an alien,” he said, smirking at him.

Harry laughed and wiggled his fingers at him before walking towards a lane and diving in.
Louis watched him for a bit warming up before he got back to his work.

He’d wanted to accompany him to the pool that morning to see what it really took. It was one
thing to hear that Harry worked hard, that he was busy, that swim took over everything. It
was another to see him at 5:30 in the morning drinking pre-work out that tasted like
watermelon sugar piss (he checked) and pushing himself first in the gym and then in the pool,
all while on school break.

His dedication was just as devastatingly attractive as Louis thought it’d be.

On Saturday night, after a long round of Scrabble with Harry’s family where he fought so
vehemently for the word ‘Vibey’ that Robin told him he’d give Louis a Law diploma right
then and there at the end of it, they slipped outside. Louis was still cackling over the game
and didn’t even mind that he’d lost. The win was in the argument and he could shove vibey in
Harry’s face forever.

The pool was lit up blue in the dark night, casting Harry in an otherworldly glow.
“Did you want to go in the hot tub?” Harry asked. They both had half full glasses of wine and
their lips were stained red. Harry was only allowing himself one, but Louis was on his second
and feeling all the better for it.

They were both still in their bathing suits from the beach earlier, where they’d just sat on
towels in the sand, soaking up the late November sun. Instead of going in the water, they’d
traced sand coarse fingers over each other’s knees and the curve of their thighs for a couple
of hours.

Since being at Harry’s family house, they’d been barely touching and he understood it. He
respected it. But goddamn did he miss it. To be constantly surrounded by Harry - his laugh
curling through every room, the earthy scent of the fancy soaps Louis had seen in the
bathroom soaking through his subconscious, the near constant state of undress - was doing
him in.

“That sounds nice.” Louis followed him around the side of the house where the pool curved
and then opened into an attached hot tub, which was round and fairly small. Pulling off their
t-shirts, they slipped into the warm water.

He relaxed into it immediately, settling across from Harry. Their feet bumped together under
the water and he ran a toe up the curve of Harry’s calf just to see him smile.

“Did you have a good time being back home?” he asked, sipping his wine. The bubbles
brushed the bottom of the glass, more forcefully than he expected, and he nearly dropped it in
surprise.

“Yeah, it was nice. I always forget how much I miss my family until I come back.” Harry
sank a bit deeper in the water so his shoulders were beneath the surface. Louis felt a pang in
his chest from Harry’s words. Like they weren’t directed at him, but hit home anyway.
“Thank you for coming with me.”

“Thank you for inviting me,” he tossed back. “Your family is great.”

Harry smiled at him warmly across the water. The ends of his hair were wet and curling
against his neck, his face shiny with the steam pillowing between them and Louis wanted to
slip a hand down Harry’s leg to tug him forward by his ankle.

Maybe that showed on his face because Harry said, “Come here.”

He tossed back the rest of his wine and then his glass nearly toppled over when he balanced it
on the side of the hot tub. Pushing off the wall, he floated through the middle, hesitant on
where to go. Closer? Or closer?

Harry’s fingers brushed his waist and then pulled him by the hip onto his lap. Louis’ mouth
parted on a silent gasp to have Harry’s body under his again. The water rushed around them,
kissing his skin in frothy bubbles as Harry’s hands skimmed around his legs and arse under
the surface
“It was a good idea to bring you home,” Harry started, his words low and slurring even
though he’d hardly had any wine. Kissing just under Louis’ collarbone, he added, “But I
think you’re torturing me a bit.”

“Me?” That one word came out shaky. Beyond the rushing of the water he could hear the
rushing of his own pulse in his ears. Harry’s fingers pushed up the side of his swim shorts
and he nearly trembled in his lap.

“Yeah, you.” He nipped at Louis’ skin and then said, “I think I’ve been half-hard since
Tuesday. It’s been driving me crazy.”

His hands rocked Louis forward over his crotch. Louis skimmed his hands up Harry’s arms
and then around his shoulders, slotting his fingers through Harry’s hair. Tugging lightly,
Harry’s hips jump underneath him. Louis smirked down at him, Harry’s eyes sparking in the
night and when the meaning of Harry’s words settled into him, he snorted out a short, aborted
laugh. He had left Harry hard and wanting the night before they left.

“I forgot about that.”

“Lucky you.” Harry kissed the base of his throat and then licked over his Adam’s apple. “I
can’t seem to forget.”

Louis rocked forward over him and then ducked his chin to meet Harry’s lips where they’re
still hovering by his neck. They met in a slow, messy kiss. He wrapped an arm around
Harry’s shoulders and pulled himself as close as he possibly could.

Harry was hard underneath him, a delicious feeling he was helpless to resist grinding onto,
and firm in front of him, their heartbeats rabbiting between them, and tight against his arse,
where Harry was holding him firmly against himself. He had a way of making Louis feel
delirious, delusional, of making him feel like the only thing tying him to Earth was Harry
arms holding him down.

Louis pulled back from the kiss, breathing heavily already, and tugged gently at the hair on
Harry’s head.

“Aw, baby,” Louis whispered, his voice dripping in condescension. “You wanna come?”

Harry laughed and dropped his head back against the wall of the hot tub, Louis’ fingers
slipping out of his hair and Harry’s chin jutting up towards him. He had a lazy sort of smile
on his face as he started to grind his hips up steadily. Louis held himself still, though he badly
wanted to move with him, to simulate what it would be if their clothes were off.

“Yeah, Lou,” he breathed out. The fingers against his arse flexed and squeezed and Louis’
sucked his bottom lip into his mouth to hold in the moan.

“Right here?” He leaned forward, hovering his mouth just an inch from Harry’s. “Where
anyone could see?”
He skated a hand down Harry’s chest and into the water, slipping over his abdomen and down
to squeeze once at his cock. It was fully hard in the warm water and pulsing along with the
jets.

“Please,” he said, the word rumbling out of his chest so low he could barely hear it over the
bubbling around them.

Louis smiled in the way Harry liked, his teeth a sharp bite into his lip and then leaned
forward to kiss him again. Keeping his hand on Harry’s cock over his shorts, he squeezed
along with every brush of his tongue, every pull of Harry’s lips. It was tantalizingly
unhurried, a heady, slow dance of their bodies together. He wanted to see how long it took
before Harry got frustrated.

It felt like no time at all before his fingers were tickling on Louis’ inner thighs, squeezing and
pressing and pulling. With teeth tugging on Louis’ bottom lip, he pulled off breathless,
arousal coursing through him and making him a bit dizzy.

Tracing over Harry’s bottom lip with his thumb, he smeared the spit there and then dragged it
across his cheek, where he gripped Harry around the jaw. Harry licked at the smear on his
bottom lip and Louis chased his tongue back into his mouth. Letting go of his cock, he pulled
himself up over it instead, sighing into Harry’s mouth as he felt him hard underneath him
again.

They moved messily together, their lips and tongues and hips all lapping at each other slowly
along with the sway of the water. He got lost in it, in the grind, in Harry’s fingers inching up
and and under his shorts, in the taste of wine on Harry’s tongue.

He could stay like this forever, Louis thought. The steam from the hot tub was curling around
them, softening the night, bubbling on them like they were the only two people to exist. Like
he could forget they were at Harry’s parents house, that his exams started in a week, that
Harry was just someone he slept with sometimes. All wrapped up in it, wrapped up in them.

“Hey, H, mom wants to know if you want des-” Gemma’s voice startled him completely and
he scrambled to pull off Harry’s lips. “-sert.”

Standing just in front of the sliding doors to the house, she was illuminated by the light in the
living room pouring out. She wouldn’t have seen them if she’d looked straight ahead, but she
had frozen in a half turn.

“Fuck,” he mumbled, trying to push off Harry’s lap, but Harry’s hands were frozen on Louis’
bum preventing him from moving.

Gemma looked shocked for a minute and then let out a short laugh.

“Never mind, seems like you already had some,” she teased.

Louis snorted and looked back towards Harry, who looked a little shocked, a bit
dumbfounded, and hadn’t yet moved a muscle.
“Was there apple pie left?” Louis’ voice came out a little hoarse, the words slow from
arousal. Under the water he touched Harry’s arm gently and then pulled it off himself, which
had Harry finally moving, like he came back to reality all at once. Louis floated off him
slightly.

Gemma laughed again and said, “One piece.”

“Save it for me!” he called. “I’ll be right in.”

“If you’re sure,” she drawled, and maybe it was the low lighting or the distance, but he swore
she wiggled her eyebrows at him.

Louis huffed out a laugh and she disappeared from view.

He turned back to Harry, who was still plastering himself against the wall of the hot tub, as if
he could disappear right then and there.

“Alright?”

It took a moment, but then Harry nodded. Louis smiled at him and leaned over to give him
one last peck on the cheek. Standing up on the seat in the hot tub, he started to get out. The
air was colder than he remembered and his whole body broke out in goosebumps.

“I-” Harry started and then stopped, his brows tugging together in the middle. “I wasn’t sure
they were okay with it.”

He sounded puzzled and if Louis hadn’t understood what he meant immediately, he would
have been lost. But Harry had admitted on his couch two months before that he was pretty
sure they’d all forgotten he was bi. That he was never certain if they accepted it or not.

“She didn’t seem bothered,” he pointed as kindly as he could. Water pooled around his feet
and he dripped onto the concrete of the pool deck. The arousal coursing through him was
starting to calm, but he didn’t want to go in until his erection had gone back down.

“Yeah,” he said, that wrinkle still deep set between his eyes. “Maybe.”

Louis grabbed a towel and wrapped it around his shoulders. Harry hadn’t moved yet and
seemed lost in his own head.

“Are you coming in?”

“In a minute.”

Louis watched him a moment longer before turning to go back inside. It was something
Harry needed to think about on his own - the things he kept burying about himself. His
sexuality, his connection to his dad - the fears he had about them being seen. Like acceptance
was waiting with open arms, but he was too afraid to step into them.

Louis dripped for a moment on the threshold to Harry’s living room, watching his mum
laughing with Gemma in the kitchen, plates of dessert on the counter already and a tub of ice
cream melting next to them. Robin walked in and kissed Anne on the temple.

He stepped inside.
 December & January

Sunday morning they drove back to Gainesville, Harry’s hand staying on his thigh the whole
way back like the concern he’d had in the hot tub had dissipated. They’d kissed against
Louis’ front door before he made Harry promise to not even breathe in his direction for the
rest of Reading Week. Then Harry had left Tuesday afternoon to fly to North Carolina for the
US Swimming Open.

Now it was Friday and Louis was once again in his study cubicle with his headphones on and
a swim meet playing on his laptop. That morning he’d taken his first exam, for Torts, an
essay that had taken him four hours and a further two revising before he’d submitted it. A
headache was burning behind his eyes already, but he had another exam on Tuesday and an
essay due the same day, so Louis didn’t have time to waste.

Harry had texted him the events he was swimming at the start of the week with an assuring
“you don’t need to watch” that Louis had thrown off.

The 400 Individual Medley finals were that evening, but Louis wasn’t sure where Harry’d
landed from the morning’s qualification heats. It was the first big event of the season,
heading into the Olympic year, according to Harry, so he didn’t want to bother him by asking.
Louis had listened intrigued over the weekend when Harry’s family had talked about it.
Apparently, Harry had never been before and they all agreed it was a medium sized deal.

Harry had called him the night before, apologizing if he was interrupting his studying. In
truth, Louis had been dying for a break and relaxed back into his bed to the steady timbre of
Harry’s voice.

“I finished second in the B final behind Bobby in the 400m, Lou.” Louis could hear him suck
in a breath through the line and then let it out in a rush. Before Louis could say he’d watched
with his hands over his mouth, Harry spoke again, “Had a new best time by four seconds, so
I’m feeling really good about that. It’s not my best event, so, yeah.”

“That’s really good, sunshine,” Louis whispered into the phone.

“I’m trying to do what we talked about.”

“You can, I know you can.”

“I want it so badly, Lou. I’m starting to see it.”

Louis had smiled to himself and imagined what Harry’s face looked like as he said it. Was he
determined, was he thoughtful. Was there hope curling around his lips. He wished they’d
been on FaceTime.

Now, his eyes were drooping and his shoulders were so tense they were sore to the touch, but
he couldn’t take a break and he wouldn’t miss Harry’s swim. The women’s B final was on
and he tuned out the cheering, the sound of the water, as he reviewed his study guide for the
Criminal Law final. It was the only exam he had to take in the classroom and for some reason
that was making him more nervous.

The race ended on the screen and he turned a page in his study guide.

The A final swimmers were on the blocks when there was a knock on his door. Pulling out a
headphone, he twisted the door open to see Liam on the other side.

“Hey, mate,” he said, turning to look at his friend. Liam appeared just as haggard as Louis.
They weren’t in the same Torts class, but they’d all had their exams today. “Rough go of it?”

“I feel like I could die,” Liam groaned and leaned heavily against the door frame, causing the
whole wall to shift. Unbothered, he just swayed with it instead of moving. “What about
you?”

Louis nodded. “Pretty much the same.”

He rolled his shoulders, trying to release some of the tension, but it persisted. In his ear, the
crowd cheered and he looked over to see the women’s A final finishing.

“What’re you watching?”

“Harry’s got a race,” he said and then felt his ears burn at the admission.

“Oh, do you wanna move to a table out front? I’d love to watch with you.”

Louis blinked at him for a moment, surprised by the suggestion. It had seemed like a dirty
secret to say he was watching, almost like he was spying or a peeping Tom. Not like Harry
had mentioned the times or that they were friends, if nothing else. But it was endlessly
surprising for him to see the ways Liam expressed friendship. He cared because Louis cared
and that meant a lot to him.

“Sure, let me just,” he said and waved to the mess. Liam laughed and nodded, slipping out of
the doorway and down the hall.

Keeping one headphone in his ear so he could hear the names announced for the C final,
Louis gathered his things. He stacked his notebooks up under his laptop, the screen still open
so he could keep an eye on it as he walked. When the announcer finished, Harry’s name
hadn’t been called and he felt a sigh of relief.

The main study room was nearly full. It didn’t matter that it was a Friday when it was the
first day of finals. Liam was at a table facing the wall on the other side of the room and Louis
weaved through the room, only catching a few scathing looks as he went.

When he sat his laptop in the center of the table, Liam glanced over with a slightly crazed
look in his eye that Louis was sure matched his own. He relaxed slightly as Louis sat down
next to him. On the screen, the swimmers were coming off the blocks in the butterfly.

He set his books out and kept an eye on the screen.

“Is he in this one?”

“No, either A or B, but I’m not sure which. I missed the heats this morning.”

Liam hummed focusing back on his work, while Louis pulled out his study guide again,
feeling his shoulders tense. The swimmers were already on the freestyle and he tried his
hardest to focus.

The extra headphone was hanging loose by the cord against his chest and he held it up for
Liam. It took him a second to notice, but when he did he smiled and pushed it into his ear.

The C final ended and it was only a few minutes more until they walked out for the B final.

Louis watched the screen intently, but Harry wasn’t in any of the lanes. His heart started
beating faster at the thought. This wasn’t one of his better events. He was just giving it a try,
but he’d made the A final.

It was drumming through him, how badly he wanted Harry’s dreams to come true. Already,
after this short of a time.

When they said “on your mark” on screen Liam looked up to watch them jump off the
blocks.

“It’s good he’s in the next one?”

“Really good.” Louis watched them swim the first lap and then said, “I hope he’s not too
nervous.”

Liam looked over to him and Louis did his best not to react. He didn’t want Liam to ask. To
look too closely. Because he didn’t have a good answer.

The B final ended quickly with another swimmer from Florida coming in first and shattering
their own record. Louis stopped the pretense that he was studying, his eyes glued to the
screen.

The men started to walk out from the ready room and Louis leaned forward toward his
computer screen as each new face popped on the screen and then there was Harry, second
from the back. His blue cap pulled on, his goggles already down, shoulders bouncing with
energy even as he walked.

The announcers cut to talking about Leon Marchand breaking Michael Phelps’ record and
what Chase Kalisz was expected to do in the event, but Louis’ eyes were scanning the screen
for Harry instead of paying them any mind.

The camera panned up from the swimmer in lane one to show Harry in lane two. He was
stretching one leg on the block as the announcers started speaking.

“And we have Harry Styles out of the University of Florida, making this A final. The twenty
year old is in lane two.”
Harry slapped his thighs in quick succession and they moved on to lane three.

Louis hadn’t realized how tightly he was clenching his hand until the tip of his pen slipped
off his paper and he looked down to see he’d left a long stripe of ink in the middle of his
study guide.

“I’m nervous,” he admitted to Liam, unable to keep it in.

“Is it a big meet?” Liam asked, still typing on his laptop.

“Yeah, I think so. At least it is to him.” And that was all that mattered.

They finished introductions and the swimmers climbed onto the blocks. Louis leaned forward
as far as he could and a second later they were shooting off. Harry looked like he got a good
start, but what the fuck did he know?

He was seventh at the turn into backstroke. The three swimmers in the center of the pool had
pulled away with it and Harry seemed to be slower as they turned in the second fifty meters
of the backstroke.

“I hate this,” Liam said, as Harry was the last to turn into the breastroke.

Louis bit at his thumbnail and watched Harry gain ground on the screen, but the distance
seemed too big to catch up on. He was fifth into the free, his favorite stroke, but he was still
eight seconds behind.

Every swimmer in the field turned it up on the free. It was the first time Louis’d really seen a
meet where the competition was tight. It was the first time he’d watched any sort of world
class swimming at all. There were Olympians in the mix, world champions. It was a test in
how Harry would stand up, if he even could stand up.

In the end, he was just out touched for fourth and came in fifth. The camera was focused on
the winners, but Louis kept his eyes trained to the corner of the screen. It was a deep field,
even Louis could see that, and he’d imagine even with fifth Harry would be happy with this
result.

The swimmers were breathing heavily as they got out of the pool and there in the library
Louis was doing the same. Like he’d just gone for a run or swam the race himself. Like it had
all worked him up so bad and he needed his own time in the warm down pool.

“Well,” Liam said and then looked at Louis.

“I think that was good,” he said with more confidence than he felt. The winner of the race
was being interviewed and Louis was hardly paying attention anymore. “That was Harry’s
only race, but we can keep watching if you want?”

Liam shrugged. “Might be a nice change of pace. I can hardly concentrate now, maybe it’ll
drown out my thoughts.”

“God, here’s hoping.”

The meet rolled on to the next women’s event and he stayed plugged in with Liam.

“Hey, thanks for coming to get me,” he said after a beat. “This is nice. Better than being in
there on my own.”

Liam smiled at him and bumped their shoulders together. “’Course, Lou.”

As soon as Liam’s attention was back on his work, Louis pulled out his phone to text Harry.

Harry

Louis: A FINAL !!!!!

Harry: proud of you sunshine

On Tuesday, after turning in his essay and finishing his exam, Louis crashed for a three hour
nap that left him more delirious when he woke up. His final exam for Intro to Lawyering was
still a week away, but he’d almost rather take it right then and there than have seven whole
days of waiting.

The stress was starting to get to him and it was usually the way he thrived the most. On his
toes, just on the edge of being too tired, too high strung, but instead of relishing in it, he kept
running through everything that had happened that day in these exams. Mentally correcting
himself. Cursing errors he knew he’d made.

Next to him on the bed, his phone buzzed and he squinted at the screen through his headache.

Harry

Harry: Finished my last exam!

Harry: How are you doing?
Louis: i feel dead
Louis: come over

Throwing an arm over his head, he bemoaned his past self for leaving the blinds open. He’d
walked home in a bit of another world, barely blinking between the time he left campus and
was putting his keys in the front door with a shaking hand. Then he’d collapsed face first on
the bed, running through exam questions for an hour before he’d finally fallen asleep.

His phone slipped from his fingers and then vibrated where it had landed on his chest.

Harry

Louis: come over

Harry: I thought I wasn’t allowed to
breathe near you until finals
were over
Louis: i retract that
Louis: strike it from the record
Harry: Lawyer speak, so hot

Louis snorted and dropped his phone back onto the bed. It took him a couple minutes, but he
managed to force himself out of bed to drink some water and take a couple ibuprofen. He was
in the kitchen massaging his neck when there was a knock on the front door.

Maybe it was weird that Harry was comfortable enough to walk right into his house, but he
kind of liked it. A second later Harry peered into the kitchen and Louis gave him a sheepish
grin, his hand still digging into the knot in his shoulder.

“Well, you look like shit.” Harry leaned against the door frame and, despite his words, gave
him a sweet smile. His bright orange UF t-shirt was an offense to Louis’ pupils with the
headache still burning.

“You do know how to make a lad feel good.” Louis rolled his eyes and would have flashed
him the finger if his thumb didn’t hit a tender spot and he let out a hiss.

“Are you tense?” Harry asked and then cringed. “That sounded like a line.”

Louis let out a loud, fake sounding moan. “Make it a line. I’m so tense I could scream.”

Harry moved into the kitchen, scraping his teeth over his lip. They hadn’t properly gotten off
together in ages and now that Harry was here looking at him like that, he was feeling a bit
desperate for it.

“Yeah?”

Louis nodded and watched Harry’s smile slope into a smirk. He stepped closer and Louis
thought he was going to kiss him, but instead he knocked Louis’ hand out of the way and
replaced it with his own. The touch was firm, but the warmth of Harry’s fingers spread out
through his shoulder and, although the knot seared in pain, he leaned into it. Harry steadied
him with his other hand on his hip and Louis curved forward until his forehead thumped
gently into Harry’s chest.

They stayed like that while Harry slowly worked at the knot in his left shoulder and then the
one in the right.

When he was done, the whole line of his upper body felt loose. He could feel it down to his
fingertips - a tingly sort of lightheadedness. A space he’d happily live in. Where his brain
didn’t seem to work and he didn’t mind.

Harry’s hands went from digging in to gently coasting over his back, pressing every so often
and loosening the tightness. Louis was alternating between sighing into his chest and
catching himself drooling from the sensation.

Finally he was just running his hands up and down Louis’ back and then he pulled him into a
tight hug. Wrapping his arms around his waist, Louis tucked his face into Harry’s neck,
breathing in that familiar scent of chlorine and herbal soap.

“Did you want a cuddle?” Harry asked, his breath tickling the hairs on Louis’ neck.

Louis shook his head. “I just woke up actually. Can’t get my brain to shut off.”

Even now, after Harry untangled his back and calmed his whole body with the gentle press of
his hands, he couldn’t stop thinking.

Harry’s hands skimmed over his shoulders and he held Louis’ head softly between them.

“What do you need?”

Louis looked up at his eyes - a clear green. Calm, like the water in the ocean had been. He
could almost see the way the sun rose reflected in them, the heat, the way it should have been
blinding to look right at him.

He sucked in a breath. There was no polite way to say it, no point in beating around the bush.

“I need to get out of my head. I need you to get me out of my head. At least for a little while.
Can you do that for me, sunshine?”

“Yeah,” Harry breathed out in a rush, his fingers flexing on Louis’ face. Sparks ran down his
neck and had his pulse already jumping under his skin.

He coaxed Louis up by his jaw for a kiss, the stretch of it delicious, the press of his lips a
warm weight against Louis’ own.

Harry pulled away a moment later and, with his lips still against Louis’, said, “Let’s go to
your room.”

Nodding, he kept his eyes closed, trying to breathe in Harry’s peace. Louis pressed another
kiss to his lips, just the barest touch, before Harry led him back to his room. The headache
was still pounding behind his eyes, but the arousal was just beginning to lap against it.

When the door closed behind them, Harry tugged off his shirt, then coasting his hands over
all the spots he’d just worked out in the kitchen, but this time against bare skin. The touch of
it felt electric, intoxicating, but comforting. Louis leaned into it, almost unsteady on his own
feet.

He let Harry touch him and felt his mind wander. There was a spot in his Con Law essay he
wished he’d managed to tighten up before-

“You’re never this quiet,” Harry remarked, nipping gently at his throat.
“Wish I’d expanded more in my Con Law final,” Louis sighed out, the words carrying the
weight of his frustration.

“Thought you didn’t want to think anymore?”

Scrunching his nose, Louis rolled his eyes. “Can’t seem to fucking stop.”

Harry kissed behind his ear, his breath warm on his cool skin, shivers running down his back.
He felt Harry smile, his teeth against his skin and felt the air changed in the room. The energy
bending around Harry’s happiness.

“We’re going to play a game.” Harry leaned back from him, his hands slipping down to
Louis’ hips and resting just above his shorts.

“What kind of game?”

“The kind where if you can still think then I’m doing a pretty shit job.”

Louis smirked at him. He never lost his head, never completely.

“Yeah, baby. Sounds like a challenge for you, but a good time for me.”

Huffing out a laugh, Harry pressed a kiss to his temple. He tugged down Louis’ shorts and
underwear in one go and Louis kicked them off to the side. Harry’s eyes raked from his chest,
to his cock, which was half hard just from the way Harry had been petting his body, to his
thighs.

And Louis let him look, not minding it at all, and actually felt himself chub up a bit further
from the attention.

Harry roughly drew him in for a kiss and if his distraction tactic was to go hard and fast,
Louis wouldn’t complain. He met him just as eagerly, biting into his mouth with urgency.
Harry’s hands skimmed up and down his back, pressing along the muscles tightly, like he was
still trying to massage him even while they were otherwise occupied.

His palms curved around Louis’ arse and Louis panted in his mouth from the touch. It was
exactly what he needed, exactly what he wanted. He ground his hips forward into Harry’s
thigh and then pushed back into Harry’s hands, whining against his lips.

Harry pulled back from his mouth with a bite.

“Wanna eat you out.”

Louis hissed out, “Yes.”

He leaned forward to kiss Harry again, their mouths slick between them, their tongues
brushing in a sensual dance. Harry moved to kiss the corner of his mouth and then along his
jaw before sucking on his neck and biting it gently.

“Get on the bed, Lou.”

Nodding, Louis sucked in a breath while Harry continued leaving open mouthed kisses to his
throat. Finally, his hands slipped off Louis’ body, causing him to sway on the spot for a
minute before blinking back to himself and laying face down on his messy bed.

The blankets were tugged out from underneath him and he looked over his shoulder to see
Harry tossing them onto the floor.

“You know you have the best ass I’ve ever seen?”

Louis snorted. “Liar. I’ve been to a swim meet.”

Harry laughed, loud and beautiful, but kept his eyes on Louis’ body with such a look of open
affection.

He skimmed a hand up the back of Louis’ thigh and Louis shifted on the bed in pleasure.

“It was the first thing I noticed about you.”

“Thought you liked my smile?” he teased.

Harry smirked up at him. “’Course I do. But you backed right into me. Hard to miss.”

His eyes closed around his own laughter. That first image of Harry was still burned in his
brain. The sun beating down on him, the dimples swooping in his cheek like the way his
heart had soared in his chest.

Something soft hit his back and he turned to see Harry had tossed his bath towel at him.

“Put that underneath you.”

Louis rolled his eyes, but shimmied it underneath his front, then rose to his knees and
bending over as seductively as he could. Harry kept his eyes on him even as he pulled off his
own shirt and shorts, palming himself in his briefs, but leaving them on.

“Which exam were you worried about?” Harry asked as he knelt onto the bed behind him.

Louis let out an annoyed breath. “Really both of them. I think they were fine, but there’s a
couple things I can’t seem to stop-”

He cut off at the first touch, the words shriveling up and dying in his throat. Morphing into a
strangled sounding moan at the delicate swipe of Harry’s tongue.

Louis arched his back and leaned into it, his head going a bit fuzzy from those first touches.
So good it could make his toes curl. Harry’s hands wrapped roughly around his hip bones, his
thumbs digging into his cheeks and tugging them to the side.

Everything in him zeroed in to where Harry was hovering behind him, his hands, his lips.
The swirl of his tongue. He couldn’t track a single thing Harry was doing other than it had
Louis panting and moaning into the sheets.
He was lost in it for a minute, his cock starting to leak where it hung straight out from his
body; the towel soaking up every drop. His hips were shifting with every curl of Harry’s
tongue, trying to lean into it, chasing him for more.

Harry pulled back and pressed a wet kiss to his arse cheek.

“You good?” he asked, his words almost slurred.

Louis arched his back more and gave a breathy, “Yeah.”

Humming, Harry thumbed around his hole. “Forgot to ask how Torts went on Friday.”

Louis groaned, dropping his head. Tension rising in his back. “It was so long, H. Like, I got
up afterwards and my back sounded like it had aged a hundred years when I stretched it.”

Harry ran a soothing hand up his spine and Louis shivered from the touch.

He leaned back in with his tongue to Louis’ rim again before pushing inside and pulling a
moan out of him. Each thrust forward felt like air was escaping his lungs, like a rushing in his
ears and a wave down his spine. He stretched his arms out in front of him to grasp onto his
pillow, just to hold something.

“Feels so good, baby,” Louis moaned.

In response Harry’s thumb pressed against his rim again, rubbing at the puckered skin and
causing Louis’ legs to spasm against the sheet.

He pushed in next to his tongue and wiggled them both, stretching him out. Louis felt the
pleasure of it through his whole body, unfurling and washing over him. The sensation was so
heady he had to bite gently at his own wrist.

Harry worked him slowly. His tongue moving languidly in his arse, the torturous push and
pull of his thumb, so tender that Louis was nearly ready to start riding it himself. He was
loosening up under Harry’s movements, but the rest of his body in a tense line, arousal sharp
in his posture.

One last lick and then Harry pulled, leaving Louis trembling. His thumb was still pressed
inside, barely anything, but he was on fire under it. Biting at the meat of his cheek and then
kissing over it, Harry licked where his arse met his thigh and then sucked on his balls lightly.

Louis wanted to let Harry go as slow as he wanted, but he was itching for something more.
Wiggling his arse so Harry’s thumb tugged slightly, Louis moaned into his wrist.

“Impatient,” Harry admonished. Louis huffed out a laugh and licked his lips, drying to blink
away some of the arousal. “Your next exam is…?”

“Tuesday,” Louis muttered. The need was pulsing through him, but the anxiety crept in with
Harry’s question. “Should be the easiest one, but I don’t know.”
Humming, he leaned over Louis’ body and pressed a kiss to his shoulder before grabbing the
lube and a condom from his night stand.

“Is it remote?”

Sighing, he stared at the headboard. “Yeah, timed for three hours though.”

Harry palmed at his arse and then there was the snick of the lube bottle opening.

“You’re gonna do great, Lou. I know it.”

He wrinkled his nose in disagreement only because their position meant Harry couldn’t tell
his reaction.

“Can’t you see it?” Harry teased, his breath hot on Louis’ hole again. Cool lube dribbled
down his crack and Harry rubbed at his rim with it before pressing in. Louis’ breath caught in
his throat. “Hm?”

Louis pushed back against his finger and Harry slipped a second one in. He hissed out in
pleasure, chasing that feeling. Harry was kissing over his backside, down his thighs, sucking
and biting at them. It had him feeling squirmy inside. He needed more.

“Lou,” Harry said against his inner thigh, tonguing over a bite he’d just left. “Can you see
it?”

Licking his lips, he swallowed heavily. “Yes, of course.”

Harry twisted his fingers and Louis moaned long and low when he rubbed over his prostate.
Pleasure raced up his spine and his legs trembled where they were holding him up.

“Right there,” he breathed out as Harry massaged him over and over again. The pillowcase
was twisted and knotted around his fingers and he was tugging them thoughtlessly, drool
pooling on his hand where it was still against his mouth.

Another finger was pushed in and then they started moving faster. Louis was frozen against
it, just taking the rhythmic plunge of it, ears ringing with euphoria. His cock was so hard, it
felt so good.

Harry kissed right next to his hole, his fingers still working in and out and then sucked a
bruise. Louis yelped and then moaned, the pleasure in the pain so deliciously sharp.

“What’s the date?”

Louis laughed into his hand. “It’s fucking Tuesday, mate.”

Harry huffed, massaging over his prostate again. The feeling so intense he yelped.

He bit Louis’ cheek and said, “Guess you need more then, mate.”

A giggle bubbled out of him at Harry’s mock English accent.

In a moment he was empty, his body shivering around nothing. He looked over his shoulder
to watch Harry stumble out of his briefs and then roll the condom on. He was so stunning in
the nude, long and lean, his cock angry looking and gorgeous standing out in front of him.
Harry slicked himself up with lube and Louis shook his arse a bit on the bed while he waited
for him to come over.

As Harry rolled his eyes, he positioned himself behind Louis. His hands were hot against
Louis’ hips and his cock a delicious press against his arse cheek and then resting just against
his hole.

“Come on Harry,” Louis teased. “Thought this was a game.”

Harry laughed, one short, sharp ha! and then he pushed in, his fingers like a vice against
Louis’ hips. They both moaned as he slipped in - maybe a bit too fast, but Louis liked it.
Harry knew he would.

It should have been fast and dirty. He should have been clawing up the sheets as Harry
pounded him into the mattress.

Instead it was unhurried, deliberate.

Harry laid over his back and thrust deeply, his whole body covering Louis’. As if he was
surrounded. As if the drag inside of him, molasses slow, thick and delicious, was the only
thing he could focus on. Harry’s breath was hot on the back of his neck and Harry’s hand was
pressed over his into the mattress.

The angle was just right, burning through him. Harry kissed the back of his neck, his tongue
rolling over him in time with his thrusts. A simmering heat sizzled through him, caramelizing
under his skin.

He got lost in it, stretched his arms out in front of him and moaned with each thrust, every
slow drag inside of him. He was on fire from the inside out in the best way, like everything in
his body was lighting up, smoldering and searing him.

Harry leaned up, scraped his nails down Louis’ back, drawing a yelping moan out of him,
before they gripped his hips tightly.

“How’re you feeling, baby,” Harry said slowly, his words elongating in his own pleasure.

“I’m-” He swallowed hard as Harry ran over his prostate again and again. His brain was
starting to white out with pleasure. He’d been teased and teased for what felt like ages now.
“I, um.”

He didn’t need to look to know Harry was smirking, well pleased with himself for rendering
Louis dumb and useless.

“Yeah,” Harry answered, just as uselessly. He reached around to grip Louis’ cock and started
to thrust faster, pulling him off at the same time. It was only a few short tugs before he was
spilling, his head blissfully silent for the first time in ages.
He hardly noticed when Harry came, how he bent over Louis’ back and rested his head on
Louis’ shoulder. The messy kisses he smeared over his skin.

When the rushing in his ears calmed, when he felt like he could breathe again, he came back
to himself slowly.

Finally, he said, “Thank you.”

Harry kissed his shoulder again and then pulled out. “Of course, Lou. Was that alright?”

Harry stood and Louis stretched his body, careful not to touch the towel underneath him
covered in his come. He felt so good all over. “Yeah, sunshine. Was just what I needed.”

He looked over to Harry and he was smiling dopily at him. Louis couldn’t help returning it.
He felt more relaxed than he had in days, weeks even.

“Did you want to shower?”

Louis nodded, but didn’t move for another couple minutes, while Harry disappeared into the
bathroom to turn the water on.

He breathed out in the empty room. It was too much sometimes how Harry seemed to just get
him. Knew just what he needed when Louis asked for it and did it better than Louis could
have dreamed. It was just - not what he expected. In the best way.

After they showered and after they slipped on fresh underwear from Louis’ drawers, they
stole a bag of grapes from the fridge and an apple each before climbing back into bed. Harry
picked the covers up from where he’d tossed them on the floor and then spun in a circle for a
second looking at the mess.

“I think I can count ten articles of my own clothing in here and my missing swim cap.”

Louis shrugged and tossed a grape in his mouth. The flesh snapping under his incisors in the
most satisfying way. “Sounds kinky.”

Harry laughed and left everything where it was, scooting in next to him, pressing their legs
together from hip to ankle and slouching against the headboard with an arm low along Louis’
back. When they’d been in the shower Harry had stroked over the bites and hickeys he’d
littered Louis’ backside with while he’d shivered under the hot water. They stung a little to sit
on and he relished it.

It was so nice to finally relax - his head still a little dumb and a lot quieter from earlier. There
was so much he still needed to do, but it could wait until the morning.

“I’m glad you texted,” Harry said, stealing a grape from the bag and chewing slowly. They
were a bit sour and tickled the hinge of your jaw, but Louis liked them that way. Just on the
right side of uncomfortable.
“Aw, baby, did you miss me?” Louis teased and took the first biting snap of his apple, then
licked the curve of it while juice rushed down the side.

When he looked up Harry was watching him with the barest hint of a smile, like that was just
his normal face when he was looking at Louis.

“Yeah, Lou.” Harry shook his head and laughed at himself. He reached up and stretched his
back and Louis nearly let the apple slip from his fingertips at the way his torso looked
elongated and rippling. It was something he’d never tire of. When Harry’s arms dropped, he
wrapped them around Louis and tugged.

He fell into Harry’s lap with a squeak and then settled in between his legs. Harry was hot
behind him, his chest radiating heat all around him. Like the sun was shining directly on his
back.

With hands flat on Louis’ stomach, Harry held him loosely, and Louis rested his head against
Harry’s shoulder. It left an itchy sort of weightlessness in him. Like a thousand butterflies
were taking flight all across his body, but they weren’t meant to be. It wasn’t really meant to
be any of this. Harry asking about his exams, taking him home for holidays, biting Louis’
apple over his shoulder and licking a drop of juice off his skin. The heat of him cocooning
Louis so suredly, so soundly, that things were starting to change.

When Harry swallowed his bite, he said, “We leave for Christmas training on Friday.”

Louis breathed out a laugh, the words Christmas training tickling him.

“Two weeks in Colorado at the Olympic Training Center,” Harry continued, snagging another
grape from the bag. Louis’ ear was so close to his mouth he heard the snap under Harry’s
teeth and smirked down at his apple. “Kinda special treatment, I guess, since our coach is the
Olympic team coach. But it should be cool - altitude training and all that.”

Louis hummed. “When do you get back?”

“Late on the 22nd. When do you leave?”

He finished chewing his bite of apple. His mum had eventually sent him a ticket confirmation
via email with a message that said, I had to look up your exam schedule myself. Hope these
work. If not, Dan can get you rebooked. He’d glared at it for a minute, his pulse rising and
rushing in his ears before he slowly typed back a thank you.

“The 14th.”

“Was hoping to see you before you left,” Harry mumbled into the side of Louis’ head, his
words tickling the curve of his ear.

Louis had been hoping, too. For those blissful days after finals were done, when all the stress
was gone, to fuck it out of his system and forget he was going home.

“There’s always FaceTime if you miss me too much, sunshine. I’ll only be five hours ahead.”
Harry laughed, his body shaking and rocking Louis along with it.

Around another bite, with juice pooling on his bottom lip, Louis said, “I get back on the
2nd.”

“I’ll pick you up from the airport.”

Louis twisted to look at him and Harry ran a hand up his chest to hold his head steady.

“You don’t have to do that.”

“I want to.”

Louis leaned forward to kiss him, Harry licking the sharpness of the Granny Smith off his
lips and pulling him impossibly closer until Louis twisted his whole body in his arms, they
peeled off their clothes, and stopped thinking for a little bit longer.

In the morning they ate Cheerios in bed, their legs crossed and facing each other, laughing as
milk dribbled down their chins, then kissing it off each other. It felt young, like if he’d dated
in secondary school maybe he would have had sleepovers like this, mornings like this. With
his sister running down the hall outside his door and his mum watching “This Morning” on
the telly in the kitchen.

“Mike said thanks, by the way,” Harry said, slurping at the milk in the bottom of the bowl
before putting it empty on Louis’ bedside table. “He keeps asking me if I told you.”

Louis snorted. He’d read over an essay for Mike on their drive back from Jupiter because his
tutor had the flu. It hadn’t taken very long and it wasn’t a complicated sort of topic, but Mike
had been sending praise to Louis in all sorts of ways ever since. Three emails thanking him,
plus an update on what his grade was. Then he followed him on Instagram and sent him a
DM as well.

“Tell him to stop thanking me or I won’t ever help him again.”

Harry’s head fell back with a laugh and the curl that had dried awkwardly on his head
brushed the bare skin of his shoulders. Louis wanted to touch, not even sexually, just to
ground him in the moment. Instead he took another bite of his cereal.

“Oh my God, also, what’s up with Niall? I’ve been dying for an update.”

Louis nearly choked, but Harry was looking at him earnestly.

“What about Niall?”

“He had that thing with his mortal enemy right?”

Harry leaned back against the headboard and straightened his legs out, so Louis was now
sitting cross legged in the middle of them. The pillows were piled behind him, like he’d built
a nest or fort around them, made more cozy by the sun filtering in through the blinds bathing
them in golden light.

After what had happened in the ocean, Louis had rambled on about Niall’s drama to distract
them. He hadn’t wanted to let them simmer in their feelings for too long, especially with the
ones he’d for Harry burning right there on the surface. But he’d been speaking so fast and
Harry had been in such a weird mood, Louis had been sure his words were just filling the
emptiness between them, but not really being heard.

It was surprising to realize Harry had been paying attention. Even more so that he was
curious enough to ask for an update.

“Well,” Louis started, still a bit taken aback. He swirled his spoon through the stragglers in
his bowl. “Turns out he absolutely has a thing for his mortal enemy.”

“Really?”

“Oh yeah. Who could have seen it coming that rooming with the, and I quote, ‘hottest man
you’ve ever seen in your life’ would go any way other than a giant crush?”

“Did Niall really say that?”

Louis nodded and looked down to his bowl again hoping to hide the blush burning on his
cheeks. They had been his words first, but whatever.

“He’s even considering letting the crumbs thing go, which is like, big for Niall. Huge. He’s so
keen on, like, being neat. Order. Rooming together almost ruined our friendship.”

“Gee, I can’t imagine why,” Harry drawled and Louis flicked him in the knee.

Over the emergency FaceTime call they’d had with Oli, Niall had been pink in the face the
entire time, stuttering over himself as he talked about Zayn’s soulful eyes. How they sucked
you in, how he couldn’t look away from him for more than a minute at a time. The way Zayn
mumbled in his sleep, not real words or anything, and the particular way he did his hair. That
the two of them had been bumping elbows in the bathroom as they passed the blow dryer
back and forth and how that was the height of erotic intimacy.

“I’m not sure what’s next for him other than drowning in a pit of despair.”

“Well it can’t be that bad.”

“No, that was his own suggestion,” Louis said with a laugh. “You’d think working opposite
remote work schedules was the equivalent to a modern day Romeo and Juliet.”

Harry laughed loudly, the brightness of it like the sun had just peeked out from behind the
clouds. Louis smiled to himself and finished off the Cheerios, leaning over Harry to put it on
the night stands. But Harry snatched it from his hand and before Louis could squawk in
annoyance, Harry drank the milk from the bottom, licked his lips, and stacked it on top of his
own bowl.

“I’ve got to head out soon,” Harry said, checking the time on his phone. “Weights are in a
couple of hours, but all my stuff is at mine.”

“Okay,” Louis said, but untangled his legs and then kneed across the bed to settle into Harry’s
lap. Hands wrapped around Louis’ thighs immediately and Harry smiled up at him, like it
was the position he’d been hoping to find himself in all along. “Probably won’t be able to see
you again before you leave.”

“Are you excited to go home?” Harry asked, his fingertips skimming just under the hem of
his boxers.

“I don’t want to talk about home.” Louis held Harry just under the jaw and pulled their
mouths together.

An hour later Harry was really leaving. His lips were still on Louis’, but this time they were
pressed against the front door. Both of them were dressed, fully this time, after they’d pulled
each other off breathing heavily into each other’s mouths, so slowly, until Louis was sure
he’d never had a thought in his life.

Harry’s fingers were tangled in his t-shirt, but Louis felt them loosening as the minutes
passed. With a final breath passed between them, he pulled back. One last short peck and
then Louis leaned his head back against the door.

“Leave while you still have a chance.”

Harry laughed, pressed a messy kiss to his cheek and then turned the doorknob, but it
wouldn’t budge with Louis’ weight on the door.

He smiled at him sheepishly and shrugged, but didn’t move.

“Louuu,” Harry drawled, kissing his neck and then his temple.

Louis’ lashes fluttered in pleasure, trying to soak in as much of Harry’s warmth as he could.
It was just under a month before he’d see him again. Three months ago they hadn’t even met,
but now it seemed an impossibly annoying stretch.

Finally, he stepped forward, ran a hand down Harry’s side for a last touch and let him open
the door.

“I’ll call you,” Harry said, leaving another kiss on his lips and then his cheek.

Louis nodded and in a second he was out the door and off the porch. Louis stood there until
he heard Harry’s car start and then sighed heavily, walking back towards the kitchen.
Mina was looking morosely at a mostly empty cupboard when he stepped inside. He felt that.

They’d hardly seen each other since Thanksgiving break. Finals were brutal, but worse when
you were a post-grad. He imagined she was just as much of a zombie as him. Even so, she
was in a smart blazer over pressed trousers and her hair was sleekly pulled back on her head.
If it wasn’t midday on Wednesday he’d think she was going to a business meeting.

“We have no food,” she said, closing the cabinet doors loudly.

“I have Cheerios if you want some. I think there’s enough for another bowl.”

She sighed, but opened his cabinet and pulled the lone box out. “Thanks, Louis.”

The bag crinkled when she stuck her hand in and pulled out a fistful of cereal. She didn’t
even get a bowl, just plucked several out and popped them into her mouth chewing loudly.

“How have finals been?”

“Fucking awful,” she said around a mouthful. “You?”

“Brutal, miserable, et cetera, et cetera.”

She hummed, shoving the rest of the cereal in her mouth. Louis couldn’t help but snort, her
cheeks chipmunked out with the amount she’d just tried to cram in there.

“It’s not going anywhere, love.”

Mina rolled her eyes and chewed louder. From the drying rack next to the sink she grabbed a
clean glass and filled it with water. She swallowed the cereal loudly and then gulped down
half the glass.

“I feel like I haven’t eaten in a hundred years.” She shoved another handful into her mouth
and a few dropped out as she chewed. Louis watched, amused. “I have another exam in like a
half hour and I’m losing my mind.”

Louis grimaced sympathetically.

“Is it okay if I finish this?” she asked, waving her hand towards him, a couple Cheerios
slipping out of her grip and scattering on the tiles.

Laughing, Louis said, “Have at it.”

She gave him a wonky thumbs up and then chased the cereal with the rest of her water. The
box was tucked under her arm and the glass was put back in the sink before she moved past
him towards the door.

“Oh, we should have like dinner or something before break. Like to celebrate we survived or
something.”

“Sure,” he agreed, noncommittally.

“Great! I’m off then.” Mina pulled open the door and then turned back around with the
goofiest grin he’d ever seen her wear. “I can’t believe I forgot to fucking tell you.”

“What?”

“Someone in my course has made it, like, a luck thing, to slap your boyfriend’s boob before
each exam.”

Louis sputtered, his brain running through several things at once, but snagging dangerously
on boyfriend. “You do what?”

“It’s just there outside the classroom. We give it a tap, right on the nozzle before an exam. It’s
for luck. You should try it.” She smirked at him, but Louis was still laughing at ‘right on the
nozzle’. He’d still yet to see this giant mural of Harry, but maybe he’d have to give it a tap.
And send Harry a video of it for good measure.

“Yeah, maybe I will.”

With a last eyebrow wiggle, Mina walked out the door, a loud, “See ya!” tossed behind her.

The next Wednesday Louis left for home. It was a long flight and then startlingly cold when
he landed in Manchester. He forgot how fucking freezing it’d be in England and was
shivering in only one of Harry’s hoodies and a pair of jeans. Lottie and Fiz had come with his
mum to the airport and on the whole drive home they caught him up on the drama in school,
their friends, and both sets of twins. He nearly cried from how deeply he missed them.

The drive to Doncaster wasn’t too long, but it still surprised him every time they got off the
A1 and turned left. For years they’d lived in a semi near the racecourse. But when his mum
married Dan they’d moved further out of the city, into a big detached house where the girls
all had their own rooms. They were all happier there, but it was never going to feel like home
to him.

Downstairs was a converted walk out basement for guests, which was where he always
stayed, and Louis tossed his bag on the double bed with a sigh. He was exhausted from his
flight, exhausted from finals. Exhausted from being back even though it hadn’t been long at
all.

There was nothing wrong with his family. He loved them, he’d do anything for them.

But it worked better with an ocean between them, he worked better with an ocean between
them.

A chorus of feet pounded down the stairs and he turned to see his sisters running at him with
their arms open and he was tackled on the bed in a heap of laughter.
For the next two weeks he felt like he’d stumbled into some sort of parallel universe. He’d
nearly forgotten how empty his life had been growing up. Hardly any friends and none that
lasted the time and distance since school. When he’d been younger he’d been chasing after
the girls every day and half into the night and barely had time to think past his studies.

Now he wandered around a house he didn’t fit in, a little aimless. They had routines without
him. Lives without him. He was just a visitor for the holidays.

A few days before his birthday he went shopping with Lottie and Fiz, taking an uber to the
shopping center. They spent forever in a body care store while the girls looked at sprays and
perfumes and he smelled every single soap until he found one he thought Harry would like.
Then he bought three.

Harry had texted him sporadically while he was training in Colorado. First a gorgeous picture
of the mountains and then one of Harry and Mike giving thumbs up to the camera with the
pool bright behind them. Louis saved both to his camera roll and was barely ashamed to
admit he’d looked at the selfie more than a handful of times.

On his birthday Harry FaceTimed him with his whole family around him, all wishing him a
happy birthday. He nearly cried from it.

With his thumb nail between his teeth, he texted Harry on New Year’s Day to make sure he’d
still be able to pick him up from the airport.

Harry

Harry: Of course Lou

Harry: Forward me your flight info

It was early evening once he’d finished going through customs at the Orlando airport. His
whole body felt sore from the nine hour flight. He hadn’t slept a bit of it and was absolutely
exhausted by the time he was dragging his suitcase out behind him to the main atrium. With
his passport between his teeth, his duffel bag slipping from his fingers, and his backpack
heavy on his shoulders Louis tried to text Harry that he was through.

Before he even got the first word typed, there was a tugging on his duffel bag. Panicked, he
looked up in surprise to see it was Harry.

Letting go immediately, Harry was able to take the bag and slung it over his shoulder.

“You look like shit,” he said, grinning at him.

“Thanks, baby,” Louis responded, unbothered, pulling his passport out of his mouth, leaving
a couple teeth marks on the cardboard cover. He’d seen himself in the mirror of the airport
toilet. His hair was a wreck, the joggers and a stretched out t-shirt he was in might be his,
might be Harry’s, he wasn’t even sure. Louis was stale the way you only were after a long
flight, but Harry was looking at him like it didn’t matter at all.

Louis wanted to kiss him.

Instead, he said, “You didn’t have to park.”

Harry shrugged and nodded his head towards the exit. “How was your flight?”

“Long,” he sighed. “I think the entire plane was kids going to Disney World, so it was a loud
nine hours.”

Harry gave him a sympathetic look as they walked towards the parking garage. They chatted
all the way to the car and then on the two hour drive back to Gainesville about how each of
their holiday’s had been, about the Donny Dome’s skating rink and how he always wanted a
birthday party there, about the New Year’s Eve party Harry went to with his high school
friends and the giant metallic mermaid hanging in the kitchen.

“What do you mean it played music?” Louis asked, incredulously.

Harry was pulling off the exit on I75 towards the school, laughing so loudly it vibrated off the
windshield and echoed through the whole car.

“It just-” he said, still giggling and then wiggled his fingers on his right hand. “Her hair.”

“Oh, her hair played music, did it?” Louis rolled his eyes fondly. “Was it playing little
instruments?”

The honk of laughter was unexpected and Harry was shaking his head through it, trying to
contain it, but it wasn’t working. Louis was watching him with open affection. It burned
through him, the way he wanted to kiss the giggle off his lips, taste his smile, hear that sound
in his sleep. Harry laughed long enough that by the time it petered out they were nearly at
Louis’ house and Harry was breathing hard, wiping at his eyes.

“Listen,” he said, gulping for air. “I know I was wasted, but I swear it. Her hair played
different tones.”

Louis hummed disbelieving and Harry shook his head, but he was still smiling, just on the
cusp of breaking out into more laughter.

Harry’s phone vibrated in the cup holder and when they stopped at the next red light he
checked it.

“My mom wants to make sure you arrived okay.”

Heat bloomed through his chest. It was unexpected, her concern, her care for him.
“Tell her I said hi.”

Harry smiled at him and typed on his phone. “She asked if you’re coming to my meet on
Friday.”

A reminder was set on his phone. He’d loaded Harry’s entire schedule to his calendar back in
September, but Harry didn’t need to know that.

“I have an advisory meeting at 10:30, so I’m gonna be a little late.”

“She said she’ll save you a seat.”

Harry gave him another smile as the light turned green. He dropped his phone back into the
cup holder and instead of putting his hand back on the wheel, he rested it on Louis’ thigh. It
burned warmly through the thin fabric of his joggers and Louis let that pleasure roll through
him for a minute before he slipped his hand under Harry’s and laced them together, squeezing
once.

When they pulled up to his place, the driveway was empty. Mina wasn’t planning on coming
back for another week. Louis didn’t even have to be back this early, but the time he’d spent
back in England was enough. Honestly, he wished he’d been able to afford to fly to see his
friends. All this time apart was too much.

“Did you need help with your bags?”

Louis looked into the backseat to see his backpack and duffel bag carelessly tossed in.
Neither were heavy and he could have easily carried twice as much.

“Yeah, absolutely. No way I could manage all that on my own.”

Harry gave him a cheeky grin and Louis nearly climbed into his lap right there.

Instead, they grabbed his stuff and dropped it all right in the entrance, getting each other off
still pressed against the front door.

“What are you thinking about for this summer?” Professor Levesque asked, a pen poised in
her hand over a well worn notebook.

Louis was sitting in a hard wooden chair on the other side of her desk. Tall bookshelves
flanked the walls of her office, so full they looked like they would topple at any minute.
Picking at the cuticle on his thumb with his ring finger, he tried to ignore the anxiety rising in
his chest.
“I thought maybe an internship with a judge.” He crossed and then uncrossed his ankles. “I
was hoping to do something in Boston.”

Her tortoise shell glasses slipped down her nose as she looked up from her notes. “Why
Boston?”

He blew out a breath.

“My accommodation is only through the middle of May. I have a friend who would let me
crash on his couch for three months up there.”

She snorted out a short laugh and then shook her head. “I don’t miss the student life.”

He cracked a smile at her, which she returned before turning to her computer.

“I’m sure you saw your grades from last semester.”

Louis nodded. They’d come out a week after he got home and he’d sat in silence for ten
minutes taking them in. Nearly perfect. An A+ in Torts and Crim Law. A’s in Con Law and
Intro to Lawyering.

It had been a big fucking relief, if he was being honest. All the stressing, the studying, the
sleepless nights. It wasn’t for nothing.

“I wish I’d worked a little longer on the Con Law essay, but it turned out okay.”

Her lips twitched and then she adjusted her glasses while looking at the screen.

“Did you get an email from your professors yet?”

He shifted in his seat, unsure. “No, why?”

“You should be hearing from them soon, but I can let you know now that you’ve gotten the
CALI Excellence Book Award for your Torts course and Criminal Law.”

He blinked rapidly a couple of times. Finally, he squeaked out, “Both of them?”

She looked away from the screen to smile at him. “Don’t look so shocked, surely you worked
your ass off. Pardon my language.”

Louis laughed awkwardly and adjusted his feet on the hardwood.

“I really did,” he breathed out.

“So,” she folded her hands in front of her. “This summer. Think about it a bit. Usually we
wouldn’t recommend a 1L for a summer associateship, but I think it’s something you could
handle. A lot of firms have started or even finished the process for this summer, but I know
Professor Anson has a law school buddy at Fisher, Smith and Langley in Boston.”
“That’s-” he started and then cleared his throat, swallowing down the doubt, the insecurity.
“Thank you, really. I can’t thank you enough.”

Professor Levesque smiled at him again, a bit of warmth radiating from her typically stern
looking face.

“It’s just a call, the rest is up to you. Yes?”

He nodded, three quick jerks of his head. “Of course, yes.”

Pursing her lips, she said, “Now, let’s look at this semester.”

Twenty five minutes later he finally left her office. There was still a tremor in his fingertips
from what they had discussed. It felt like everything he was striving towards was finally
coming to fruition. Like all the years and years of overworking himself and no sleep and
being an arsehole seventy percent of the time weren’t for nothing.

Kids in his course like Josh pissed him the fuck off with their daddy’s firm and their
expectation of success. But there Louis was getting the same, doing more, because he worked
harder. He deserved it. And nothing ever felt so good.

He was thrumming with it as he walked towards the O’Connell Center for Harry’s meet. That
burning pride he had in himself. The deep satisfaction that he was one step closer to his goals
and that the push was worth it.

If he worked harder, smarter, what else could he accomplish?

The humidity was strong when he walked into the pool area, loud with cheers as a race
finished up in the pool. He looked up to the boards to see they were still on the relays.
Thankfully, he hadn’t missed much.

Louis picked his way across the room and then scanned the bleachers to find Harry’s mum
and step-dad in the stands. Anne, as she’d insisted he call her on FaceTime on his birthday,
waved at him enthusiastically when he spotted her and he sent her a shy one in return. He
climbed up to where they were sitting and she moved a sweater off the seat next to her. A
space she’d clearly saved for Louis.

It sent a thrill through him.

Louis wasn’t sure what they thought about him. If Gemma had gossiped to their parents after
she’d caught them in the hot tub. But he was getting this vibe, this inclination to believe that
Anne understood there was something different about Louis.

He had no clue if Harry was noticing it too.

There was no point in asking. No point in revisiting what their arrangement was. He liked
how things were now. Where they called it one thing and acted however the fuck they
wanted.
“Louis, honey, how are you?” Anne asked when he settled in next to her. She pulled him into
a side hug, the smell of her perfume strong in the chlorine scented room.

“Alright, love. How are you? How was the drive?”

She waved her hand. “Robin drove the whole way. I was knitting these darling little socks for
my coworker who is having a baby girl in a couple of months.”

“Oh, let me see.”

She pulled them out and they talked about knitting, her coworker, and babies while the next
couple of races went on.

“Do you know what he’s swimming today?” Louis asked. He’d forgotten to check with
Harry, preoccupied with other things after the airport and then both of them were busy the
last couple of days.

“500 and 1000,” Robin said, peeking around Anne with a smile on his face. He had a blue t-
shirt that said ‘Gator Dad’ on it below ‘FLORIDA SWIMMING’ in big text. “Back to
business as usual.”

Then he laughed at his own joke and Anne smiled at him fondly.

They called the women’s 1000 meter race up to the blocks and Louis watched half heartedly.

“Did you do swimming when you were younger?” Anne asked.

“No,” Louis laughed. “I did footie - soccer- for a bit, but I didn’t really have time for that sort
of thing when I was in school. Coming to these for Harry has been my first time even seeing
a swim meet.”

Immediately afterwards, he realized that he’d said too much. Like an admission. But when he
looked at Anne she was smiling at him, pleased with his words.

“They can be a little boring at times.”

Louis shrugged. “I usually study when he’s not swimming.”

Then he blushed again, burning through with how obvious he was. But again, Anne smiled at
him. Almost encouraging.

It was a little awkward sitting there with Harry’s parents. He liked them, they were nice
people, but it felt like Harry should be there as a buffer. He’d never met anyone's parents in a
romantic capacity before, and, well, he guessed he still hadn’t. But Anne was looking at him
like he had. Louis felt like he had.

The women’s race finished, but Louis was hardly paying attention. He could see Harry
behind the blocks tugging at his cap, taking deep breaths and looking at the water. Louis
always wondered what went through his head. Harry had said once he was visualizing the
race, going over his goals, his stroke, but Louis didn’t really understand what that looked
like.

They started to announce the lanes and Harry got on the block in lane four. Every single time
Louis was struck by how gorgeous his body was. How powerful it looked. He did his best not
to ogle him, but it was always a struggle. Now that he’d been to a handful of meets, it was
easier to recognize Harry when he saw him like this. He knew the slope of his body so
intimately, he could pick him out with no hair, no eyes, the same suit as everyone else. Just
by the quirk of his knees, the breadth of his shoulders. The shape of his-

He bit his lip and focused on the pool as a whole. The swimmers bent down to start and Anne
lowered her knitting needles.

“I always get nervous at this part,” Anne whispered next to him, like it was a secret between
the two of them. “When he was a boy he used to be terrified of jumping off the blocks. More
than once, the race would start and he’d just be paralyzed right there. Never jumping all the
way in.”

The race started and Harry jumped off with everyone else, slipping under the water.

“How’d he learn?”

They made the first turn and Louis leaned back on the bench.

“Gemma pushed him off.”

He turned to look at her. Her and Robin were both smiling around the memory.

“Did she really?”

“Over and over again,” Robin said. “He’d stand up there and he’d say, ‘just count down, I’ll
jump this time’ like a mantra, but she always pushed him on two.”

“I’m sure he loved that,” Louis teased. Harry had a brutal pout, the angriest looking frog he’d
ever seen.

Anne laughed, hiding it behind her wrist. “Oh, he was miserable.”

“Stormed around the house for hours every time he’d come home from the pool,” Robin
added in.

“But it worked.” Anne shrugged. “Even he can admit that now.”

They were halfway through the race and Harry was pulling ahead, his stroke smooth in the
water, his pace even.

“I’ll keep that in mind next time he’s afraid of something. Just shove him into it.”

Anne and Robin both laughed and Louis suppressed a smile, holding it in to keep it to
himself. Maybe he shouldn’t have been trying to charm them, but he couldn’t help it. He
wanted Harry and he wanted them to like him.

They took the last turn and Robin was on his feet cheering as Harry sailed into an easy win.
Almost an entire lap ahead of the rest of the field. Louis clapped along with the rest of the
room and checked the time on the screen.

It was a new personal best. Again.

In the pool, Harry was breathing hard, his goggles pushed up to his cap, cheeks flushed from
the effort and water dripping down his face. But he was grinning wide at the scoreboard, then
his eyes scanned the crowd. Louis was sure they snagged on him, then on his parents, and his
smile settled in even further. Maybe even turning a bit shy.

“We were going to go to an early dinner afterwards,” Anne said, causing Louis to finally tear
his eyes from Harry just as he climbed out of the pool. “Did Harry tell you?”

Louis bit the inside of his cheek and then said, “No, he didn’t mention it.”

She rolled her eyes fondly.

“I knew he wasn’t listening to me. He drives me crazy,” she said affectionately. “I know he
has some team stuff right after, but we can pick you up on the way?”

He should probably say no. Harry hadn’t mentioned it and that was probably for a reason.
But he couldn’t stop his mouth saying, “Sure, that would be great.”

The first couple weeks of January rushed by. He spent them doing pre-reading for his
courses, with his mouth on some part of Harry’s body, or finally bonding with Mina. By the
time classes started again, he’d been back for almost two weeks.

Mina had come back from her parents in California with good weed and a high five for his
boyfriend’s lucky nipples.

“I aced every single test. Give his tits a squeeze for me.”

Sprawled on the living room floor, Louis had laughed, and chose not to deny Harry was his
boyfriend. In the haze of smoke, the warm winter sun shining through the windows, and
Mina tossing Honey Nut Cheerios in his mouth, he could hardly care.

The first day of classes fell on a Tuesday and he went to Civil Procedure and Property Law
back to back before locking himself in his study cubicle.

In undergrad, his first day of classes, sometimes the whole first week even, were spent
reviewing the syllabus. Now, he’d already been cold called twice and all his pre-reading had
only gotten him through day one of class. He had a mountain of new readings to do, plus he
needed to review the summer program list he’d made, and finalize his applications.

Professor Levesque had been right that a lot of places were no longer accepting applications
and from the ones that were, only a handful were open to 1Ls. He didn’t realize he was
already so far behind. It was only January, but he was ready to pull his hair out.

She had forwarded him the email for the recruiter at Fisher, Smith and Langley along with a
letter of recommendation. It was already more than he could have asked for.

Now, he was working up half a dozen cover letters for firms and specific judges, legs crossed
and cramped under his desk with a cooling cup of tea next to him. He’d accidentally left his
second favorite mug half full when he left for winter hols and by the time he came back the
stain on the inside had become permanent.

There was a knock and then his door was pulled open. He looked over his shoulder, still
rapidly typing the very last paragraph of a cover letter on his laptop.

Liam stood on the other side with a to go cup of coffee in his hand and a cheerful expression
on his face. It had Louis scowling.

“We have to stop meeting like this,” he said, finishing off the paragraph. Out of his six
applications, four were completed already, but he wanted to get them all edited at least once,
if not twice and sent off by the end of the day tomorrow.

“Bro, it’s only the first day of class. You could chill out.”

Louis rolled his eyes. “No, I can’t. Do you have your summer plans sorted? I think I’m weeks
behind.”

Liam sipped his coffee loudly. “Professor Busch said to just have apps done by February
first.”

“Levesque has me losing my mind over it a little bit.”

Liam snorted. The sound was loud in the quiet study space. “She’s just as intense as you are.”

“Match made in heaven,” Louis said, mindlessly.

“Did you hear they were updating CALI this afternoon? With the winners from last
semester.”

Louis shifted in his seat. He hadn’t mentioned to anyone what Levesque had told him. He
had, as she’d said he would, gotten emails from both his professors last semester
congratulating him and letting him know he’d won the book awards. But he’d kept it to
himself, unsure how anybody would react.

“Are they?”

“Supposed to be around two pm.”

Louis looked at the time on his laptop and saw it was half one. He’d been locked in there for
close to an hour and he’d never had lunch.

“Let’s get something to eat while we wait.”

Maybe he could find a way to tell Liam before it was posted.

They went to a burger place a few streets over and sat outside on the patio. It was gorgeous in
a way it would have never been in January in Doncaster or Boston. The weather was half the
reason he applied to Florida at all.

Liam kept stealing chips off his plate as he talked about the four wheeling he did with his
sister over break. Louis slapped his hand away the first couple of times, but Liam had really
powerful puppy dog eyes. Like they could be considered a lethal weapon in several countries
kind of powerful. So he had eventually relented.

“We’ll have to get you out there sometime,” Liam said, the southern accent rounder in his
mouth as he spoke of home.

“Yeah mate, you just want to laugh at me when I make a tit of myself.”

Liam tossed his head back, already laughing. Not even bothering to deny it. Louis tossed a
chip at him and rolled his eyes when Liam caught it and shoved it into his already open
mouth.

On the table Liam’s phone vibrated and before he even had a chance to check it, it went off a
few more times in succession.

Louis winced and hid it with a big bite of his burger. Across from him Liam chewed and read
his texts, his face lighting up in a grin.

Pain bloomed on his shin where Liam kicked him.

“You asshole, you could have told me,” Liam said, laughing.

Louis swallowed and put his burger down on the plate. He did his best impression of a
humble person and said, “It’s not that big of a deal.”

“Don’t make me kick you again,” Liam threatened, but he was still smiling. Like he was
genuinely pleased with Louis’ success. It was shocking, but it spread out through his chest in
a bubbling warmth.

“Fine… it’s a little bit of a big deal. Levesque told me at our advisory meeting.” Louis picked
at the bun for a moment. He never talked about this sort of thing with anyone. Usually, he
was the type of person to get a burning jealousy when someone else succeeded and Louis
always assumed everyone else did too. But Liam only ever seemed genuinely happy for him.
It’s why he said what he did next. “She wrote me a letter for my summer associate apps. And
Professor Anson gave me the number for a firm in Boston.”
“No shit?”

“No shit.”

“That’s awesome man. Like, really awesome.” Liam stole another fry and while he chewed,
he said, “See you had no reason to be freaking out earlier.”

“Incorrect,” he countered. “I have more reasons. Now they expect something out of me. What
if I fail? What if I had one good semester and then it all falls apart? Plus everyone already
disliked me and I just proved them all right.”

Liam snorted. “I think you’re over thinking all of that, except maybe the last bit.”

He grimaced down to his phone and Louis frowned. He didn’t like making enemies, he was
just used to it.

“God, what are they saying?”

“Just that Josh is pissed. Thinks he was robbed.”

Louis rolled his eyes. “What? Was I just supposed to hand him the book award like he’s been
handed everything in his life? I don’t fucking think so.”

“Here, here!” Liam cheered, then tapped his glass of sweet tea with Louis’ water cup. “I’ll
drink to that.”

Louis laughed and drank his water. He was so glad he had Liam. Liam, who’s phone was still
lighting up with whatever group chat he was in. His own phone, tucked between his legs
under the table, remained silent.

Harry

Harry: My 11am class was canceled.

Harry: You free?

Louis had shoved his books in his bag and practically skipped across campus to Harry’s
building. It was rare to see Harry for a midday shag and he could use the mental break, so he
wasn’t going to pass up the opportunity. It was a little chilly and he had that same hoodie of
Harry’s on that he’d been holding hostage. His fingers were tucked under the sleeve when he
knocked on Harry’s front door, his feet shifting on the doormat someone had brought back
from Christmas. It was tan and said You Are Home on in swooping white letters.

It opened a minute later, Harry standing on the other side in just a pair of low hanging lime
green gym shorts.
“Hey,” Louis stuttered out, not ready for the sight before him.

With a grin, Harry tugged him inside. “Hey, Lou. I’ve had, like, the best morning.”

Louis followed him into the kitchen where he had his laptop on the island and a half eaten
taco on a plate.

“What have you been up to?”

“Early practice, which I just left feeling great, and then I took a nap, saw my class was
canceled and I thought - don’t freak out - that I might take a break.”

Louis let out a faux gasp and Harry snaked a hand around his waist, pulling him in close to
his body.

“Do you need a definition for that word? Area of speech? Should I use it in a sentence?”

Louis rolled his eyes, pushing himself flush against Harry’s front, his fingers slipping over
the bare skin of his chest.

“You just used it in a sentence, you big loser.”

Harry laughed and then kissed him. Louis fell into it, his mouth opening under Harry’s,
breathing in the scent of his herbal soap and the undercurrent of chlorine.

After a moment he pulled back, their bodies still flush and said, “Just you here?”

Harry nodded, kissing Louis once more. He ran his tongue along Louis’ lips and said,
“Nobody should be back for hours.”

“And here I thought you only needed ten minutes.”

Harry laughed dryly, kissing Louis on the cheek. “You think you’re real funny today.”

“Sunshine, I’m funny every day.”

Harry hummed and then hauled Louis by the back of his thighs onto the counter. It was
surprising and a rush ran through his whole body. The stone countertops were cold under his
legs, but his skin felt overheated from Harry’s attention anyway. He settled in between Louis’
thighs, his hands still hot on top of them, with a cheeky grin on his face.

Louis pulled him in by the jaw for another kiss. The taste of salsa lingered on his lips, spicy
and sweet between them. It was slow at first, the heat building between them. Louis had a
hand in Harry’s hair, twisted the way he liked, and another cupping his jaw. Just so he could
feel Harry’s pulse, steady and quick under his thumb. The way it jumped when Louis bit his
lip or teased his tongue.

It was his favorite way to kiss. To feel from the inside out how much Harry was enjoying it.
Harry’s hand tightened around his waist and then curled around his back to pull them as close
as possible. Louis smiled into the kiss, he couldn’t help it, not with Harry’s hand hot against
his back. His teeth dug into Harry’s lip and Harry moaned in reaction. Still so hot for Louis’
sharp teeth on his skin.

He was hard in his shorts with Harry’s chest pressed against him. Maybe they could get off
like this, they hadn’t just rubbed off against each other in ages. He’d just steal a change of
clothes from Harry before he left.

His fingers twisted in Harry’s hair and in turn he sighed against Louis’ lips. Then kissed over
his cheek and bit gently behind his ear, sharp tingles sprouting from where his mouth was
against Louis’ skin. He’d hold his head there forever if he could, have Harry’s tongue
surgically attached to him.

The fingers of his other hand slid up Louis’ thigh and then under his hoodie, Harry’s hoodie,
to pet at the skin of his stomach.

Louis leaned back and pulled Harry with him, so it was easier to grind up against Harry’s
stomach. It felt like he was over him, covering him, like the only thing in the room was
Harry.

His hoodie was halfway up his stomach, Harry’s teeth against his jaw and a moan drawing
from his lips, when the door to the apartment opened.

It took a second for the sound to register over the pounding of his pulse and the rush of
Harry’s breath in his ear. But then the hands on him were gone, the mouth on him was gone
and he realized Harry would have been gone, too, if Louis’ ankles weren’t hooked around his
calf.

“Shit,” Harry muttered under his breath, nearly frozen across from him.

Louis gulped in air, feeling flushed and disheveled and surprised. He looked over his
shoulder to see Mike standing still in the doorway, the door behind him open, his jaw nearly
on the floor.

He turned back to Harry, who was staring down at the floor, or at least in that general
direction, but didn’t seem to actually be seeing anything.

Like he was panicking and Louis understood why.

Maybe that’s why he acted the way he did.

Louis laughed. Too loud and maybe a little fake sounding. Not that Mike would really know
that.

It was the only way he knew how to get out of an awkward situation, to pretend like it wasn’t
awkward at all. And he was more determined than ever to make this seem like the most
normal, natural thing for him to have walked in on. If only to get that flat, gray look off
Harry’s face.
“Hey Mike,” he said, pushing cheerfulness into his voice. “I’m sorry, mate, we thought you
had class.”

Mike finally seemed to shake himself out of it and closed the door behind him. He cleared his
throat loudly and Louis finally remembered to unhook his feet from around Harry so he could
step back.

Maybe he should get down, maybe he should cower like Harry clearly wanted to from the
way his shoulders were rising up. He was still bare chested in the kitchen and there was no
way for Mike to know that he wasn’t that way because of Louis.

But he didn’t. He sat back on the counter with his hands behind him and acted like this was
where he always sat, like his home was this slab of granite and didn’t he just belong there?

“Oh, yeah. I do have a class in like ten actually, but I forgot my laptop.” Mike ran a hand
through his hair and cast them another glance before going down the hall to his room.

Under his breath Harry whispered, “Fuck.”

“It’s going to be fine,” Louis whispered back, confidently. He would make it that way.

Harry looked at him and grimaced and then looked down at his bare chest and his frown
deepened. Louis tugged at the hoodie and mouthed, “Do you want?”

But Harry shook his head.

Mike walked back towards the kitchen, still zipping his bag in front of him.

“I’m, uh, sorry I interrupted,” he said. His eyes flashed to the two of them, where Harry was
awkwardly standing outside of touching distance to him and the casual figure Louis was
cutting.

Louis waved his comment off and then picked up the taco Harry had abandoned on the plate.
It probably looked like they had lunch together. Like this was a normal thing. He was
determined for it to be normal.

“Don’t worry about it. Hey, how’d that class end up last semester?”

Mike brightened, shifting from one foot to the other. “Really good actually. I got an A.”

“That’s awesome, mate. If you need any help this semester let me know. I should have some
time if you ever need it.”

The taco had long gone cold, but he took a bite anyway and pretended the beans (his
beloathed) hadn’t congealed into something nasty.

“That would be awesome, thanks Louis.”

“Of course.” He smiled, the brilliant one that most people couldn’t resist liking. It was his
secret weapon.
“I gotta head to class, I’ll see y’all later.” He moved towards the door.

“Oh, Mike?” Louis called, twisting his body to look at him where he was just by the door. “Is
it okay to, like, keep this between us for now? Just kind of… not really anyone’s business,
right?”

He raised an eyebrow at him, challenging. But Mike nodded.

“Got it, no worries.” He gave them a salute and the door closed quietly behind him.

It was silent for a moment before Harry let out a ragged breath. His whole chest was flushed,
but it wasn’t from arousal this time. He looked upset, like just on the cusp of crying or
throwing something and Louis wouldn’t judge him for either.

“Are you alright?”

“I have no idea,” he said, his voice sounding a little numb.

Dropping the taco back to the plate, Louis wished he could wash the taste from his mouth.
Wished he could rewind the last half hour and do it over again.

“Why don’t we go to your room?”

Harry looked at him, his face twisting in a way Louis’ couldn’t read.

“Yeah, alright.”

He looked so downtrodden and maybe they should have talked about it. Maybe he should
have asked questions. Seen how Harry felt. Offered to let him have some time on his own.
But he was shit at all of that.

Instead Louis said, “I could suck your cock, if it’d make you feel better?”

It startled a laugh out of Harry and Louis followed that sound all the way into his room.
 February

It was humid at the pool when Louis’ entered on Thursday, only a couple of days after he’d
been at Harry’s flat and things still felt off between them. Maybe it was all in his head, but he
couldn’t shake the feeling.

There was some sort of swim invitational going on heading into the weekend and Louis had
felt weird about going. He’d even texted Harry asking him if he should.

Harry

Louis: did you want me to come?

Harry: Up to you

The reply hadn’t left him very encouraged either way. Still, he left his legal writing course
and trudged up the road to the pool. It wasn’t too busy inside and he settled onto the back row
of the stands. Situated with his reading on his lap, he scoured the pool deck for Harry. Louis
had gotten a lot better at spotting him, but when he didn’t on the first pass he slowed down
and really looked at all the Florida swimmers milling about.

He wasn’t amongst them, which might have just meant he was in the warm up pool.

But he did spot Mike, drinking from a water bottle, with a hand on his hip, watching the race
happening in the pool.

Louis chewed on his lip and tried to focus on his notes, but couldn’t. Harry’s face from the
other day, shocked and still, was burned into his eyelids. He wished he’d done more in the
moment. Done more after.

They’d fooled around a little bit and then Louis had class and Harry had afternoon practice.
He’d looked so gray in the face about going, but Louis coerced him into a ride across
campus, so at least he got him halfway there. Louis had wished he had some sort of wisdom
to give him, some sort of way to get through, to cope. But he didn’t.

You either did or you didn’t. You went or you stayed home. You moved on or you were stuck
forever.

It is what it is and all that.

The crowd around him cheered and he looked up to see the women’s race had finished.

Surveying the deck again for Harry, he still didn’t see him, but when his eyes passed over
Mike, he was already looking back at Louis.

His pulse raced, but Louis sent him a small, barely there smile. Mike returned it with a wave,
a short, aborted thing, but it was still something. He turned back to the guy next to him and
Louis turned back to his reading, but he wondered what it meant. If things were fine, if they
would be fine.

Over an hour later, the meet ended. Harry won both his races and Louis had watched the joy
on his face with a sour feeling in his stomach. He didn’t look Louis’ way once and if he was
just going to ignore him then what was the fucking point?

Packing his books away and trailing out behind the last of the parents, Louis was slow to
leave the pool afterwards. When he stepped outside, he breathed in the cool air. It was
February 1st, Harry’s 21st birthday. Arguably a big deal, but with a race today and another
one tomorrow, he wasn’t sure what Harry’s plans were.

Or even if he’d want to celebrate with Louis.

But they needed to sort out whatever this was. This awkward thing where Louis wasn’t sure
where they stood wasn’t going to work for him. He knew that Harry was going through some
things, but Louis could only help with that. Surely, he couldn’t make it worse, at the very
least.

The car park behind the arena was half full when he walked into it. The early meet time
meant that it was only midday, the sun high and bright in the cloudless sky. Harry’s Range
Rover was parked near the back of the lot, half shaded under a tree without cars on either
side. Leaning against the driver’s side so that he was mostly hidden, Louis breathed out an
annoyed sigh.

He wasn’t entirely sure what he was doing, but he knew he had to do something.

Over a half hour passed before he heard the team start to stream into the parking lot. He spent
that time staring at the palm fronds rustling in the breeze and scrolling up and down his
Instagram feed without actually looking at anything. When the footsteps moved closer to
him, he froze, but nobody noticed him leaning against Harry’s car and for that he was
grateful. It had only just occurred to him that maybe it would be worse for him to be there,
depending on how things had gone for Harry.

But then Harry appeared on the side of his car and stopped at the sight of him.

His hair was still damp, falling in limp strands over his forehead and leaving small wet
circles on his t-shirt. The line of his mouth twisted into something that could have been a
smile, but not the one Louis was used to.

“Hey,” Louis said, tugging at the strap of his backpack for something to do.

“Hey,” Harry responded, hovering by the tail light for a second longer before unlocking his
car and opening the back door to toss his swim bag inside. “What’s up?”

“Can we talk?”

He nodded slowly and then jerked his head towards the car. “Inside?”
Instead of answering, Louis rounded the front of the car and pulled open the passenger door.
Harry had already climbed inside and turned the car on; the air con was blowing lightly and
the radio playing something on the Top 40 station Louis had never heard of.

Slamming the door closed behind him, he held his backpack in his lap like a piece of armor
and turned to Harry. His thumb was tapping along to the beat of the song on the steering
wheel, where he’d limply hung his wrist across the top of it.

“You had a good meet,” Louis offered.

“Thanks, Lou.” Still, Harry avoided eye contact, despite his words seeming genuine.

Louis took a deep breath and held it until his lungs burned. When he let it out he said, “Are
you upset?”

Harry tilted his head back against the headrest and looked up to the ceiling. “I don’t know.”

Louis scrunched his nose. “How do you not know?”

The sigh that ripped through the car was irritated and it hit Louis right in the chest. It was a
sound he was intimately familiar with, like one more track added to the loop in his head that
played when he felt at his worst. That aggravated, disappointed, you’ve said the wrong
fucking thing kind of sound. He swallowed around it and then tried again.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No,” Harry answered shortly. “It’s whatever. It’s fine.”

“Okay,” Louis said, the word coming out delicate, soft in the tension between them. Soft in a
way he hated being.

He thought about getting out of the car. About things ending in this weird place. How that
would feel like a knife to the gut, but he’d pull it out if he had to. He’d live, he always did.

Maybe it was his tone or the way Louis didn’t fill the silence between them for once. He
never could shut up, but sometimes there was nothing to say. Harry turned to him, the careful
mask on his face slipping to reveal a vulnerability he’d been trying to hide.

“Just sucks. And I wish…” He drew in a breath. “I wish I didn’t care this much. Wish I didn’t
get so, I don’t know, paralyzed in fear over it. Mike’s a good guy. He’s a good friend. I know
that, and yet…”

“Has he said anything?”

“No.” Harry ran a hand through his hair. “It kind of feels inevitable.”

“You said it yourself, Mike’s a good guy.” The grip on his bag loosened. “Let him be a good
guy.”

Harry nodded, giving Louis the barest of smiles. It shot through him like a spark of hope.
“Maybe you’re right.”

“I usually am,” Louis teased, forcing himself to be light. To be funny. And it seemed to work
because Harry rolled his eyes and huffed out a laugh.

“Yeah, alright.”

Louis nudged Harry’s upper arm with his elbow on the center console.

“Happy birthday, sunshine.”

“Thanks, Lou,” he said for the second time that afternoon, but it was lighter now.

“You got plans?”

Harry shook his head. “I’m doing something this weekend with the guys on the team, I think.
Can’t really do anything today with another final tomorrow.”

Pulling his lip into his mouth with his teeth, Louis nodded and when he let it go said, “Can I
take you to dinner?”

He wanted to reach across to touch him, run a finger from his elbow to his wrist and then
tangle their fingers together. Feel Harry’s warmth soak into his own skin. But if this week
taught him anything it was not to push Harry in public. Maybe not to push him at all.

So he waited with his hands to himself for an answer.

Finally, Harry said, “Yeah, I’d really like that.”

Louis smiled at him, felt the affection on his own lips, the curling sweetness in the creases by
his eyes. “Alright then sunshine, wherever you wanna go.”

Louis chewed on his thumbnail, already bitten all the way down to the point his fingertip
stung, and pressed call on a FaceTime with his two best friends.

Niall answered first, his screen slowly loading just before Oli popped on.

“To what do we owe this pleasure?” Niall asked. He was standing in his kitchen, the
immaculate counter behind him, entirely uncluttered, his fringe soft on his forehead and a
hoodie bunched around his neck.

“Outside our regular meeting time? Lou, are you feeling okay?” Oli teased.

He should have teased back, normally he would have said, fuck you with a cheeky grin and
flipped them both off. But he couldn’t quite muster anything more than a defeated sigh.
“Oh shit, it’s actually something,” Niall said.

“It’s not not something,” Louis conceded. “But it’s not anything either.”

Oli’s eyes squinted, his face getting big like he’d brought his phone closer to really look at
Louis. It had him shifting uncomfortably on the bed and he debated turning his camera off.
Then regretting not doing this as a phone call instead.

“What’s up?” Niall asked, moving to sit on the couch in his living room. The sky was dark in
the window behind him, but Louis’ room was still bathed in orange hues from the sun sinking
outside.

“Think I messed up with Harry.”

His friends sighed in unison and he wasn’t sure what that particular sound meant.

“Did you say ‘I love you’ during sex?” Oli asked.

“Call one of your rendezvous a date?”

“No, did you introduce him as your boyfriend?”

“First of all, fuck you both.” Louis glared at them, but there was a pang of hurt running
through him. “Second of all, maybe I misspoke. Things are messed up with Harry, I think.
Not that I really did anything. Just, I don’t know what to do about it.”

“What level of messed up?”

“Like Ben & Jerry’s Phish Food or a bottle of Tito’s and a fat joint?” Niall asked.

“You can come escape to Chicago, if you want,” Oli offered.

“Want me to kick him in the balls?” Niall added. “I’ve done it before, I could do it again.”

Louis bit his lip and looked at his two friends. They liked to make fun of him, tease him,
poke at him a bit. But they cared. They’d do almost anything for him.

“It was just… we agreed to be friends with benefits. And even though I just kind of blatantly
ignored that and started to fall for him anyway, he wasn’t supposed to ever find out. You
know?”

“So it was the ‘I love you’ thing?”

“No,” Louis sighed heavily. “But I’m reasonably sure that not only does his whole family
think we’re dating, now so do his friends. Or friend. And I could get away with his mum, but
his friends aren’t meant to know he’s bi.”

“Wait, what happened?” Oli asked, leaning forward towards the camera.
“Caught us making out in the kitchen, didn’t he? Proper stupid of us, I guess.” Louis sighed
and bit on his thumbnail again. It was so short he was sure it was about to start bleeding. “I
tried to play it off, but maybe that pissed Harry off more.”

“Played it off how?” Niall asked.

“I don’t know, like, the only thing that was happening was that he awkwardly caught us
making out in the kitchen, not that he just learned his roommate liked boys.”

Oli grimaced. “How’d Harry take that?”

“Still as a statue, absolute deer in headlights.”

“Yikes,” Niall offered, unhelpfully.

“How long ago was this?”

“A week ago,” Louis sighed heavily. “Kind of think I got him out of it on Thursday, but I
don’t know. I can’t tell if I’m being weird or he’s being weird. It’s messing with my head.”

Both his friends gave him sympathetic looks.

“Do you think maybe you should like…”

“Tell him?” Niall finished. “Like, how you feel.”

“No,” Louis said definitively. “He seems like a runner.”

“Lou,” Oli said softly. “You don’t always have to hurt yourself in love. Or contort yourself to
be loved.”

“Oi!” It was half hearted at most. His friends gave each other looks across the screen, across
the miles between them, like it didn’t matter that Louis was between them, that he was there
at all. And maybe it didn’t, he knew what the look meant and he hated it. Knew exactly what
they meant when they said it and he didn’t like to examine it too closely. Think about it at all.

“We just-” Niall cut another look to Oli. “We think you’re great. Anyone who doesn’t think
so is a loser.”

“A smelly, no good, loser.”

Louis let out a snort. “Thanks, guys.”

“Louis, you know-” Oli started, but Louis cut him off.

“I’m done talking about it. You can tell me ‘I told you so’ when it blows up in my face. But
that's a problem for future Louis. Someone else go.”

Niall grimaced and Oli offered, “I’ve got nothing.”

“Please, for the love of God,” Louis whined.

Niall cleared his throat.

“I asked Zayn to dinner.” Oli gasped and then Niall continued. “Well, more like, for drinks
after work. And it’s kind of a group thing, but, like, I organized a group outing so I could see
him again. Which is maybe over the top and ridiculous, but I think I’m going through
withdrawals. It’s been practically two months since I’ve seen him in person. Like, I dressed
up in my nicest cardigan for the Christmas party and he didn’t even show up.”

“The dark green one that makes your eyes look really nice?” Louis asked, trying to make his
voice sound less pathetic.

“Yes,” Niall responded back miserably.

“Fucking sucks,” Oli added. “It’s like a top five look for you.”

“No literally.” Niall sighed. “So this is take two. It’s on the 13th.”

“You organized a work party on Galentine’s Day?” Oli asked, snorting in laughter.

“Yeah! Thought it was smart. Like, if it works out then I have him as a Valentine the next
day.”

He had a bright look on his face and it brought a giggle out of Louis for the first time.

“Ni, please,” Oli laughed.

“What!”

“Nothing, man,” Oli said, still laughing. “I just love you.”

Niall’s face went soft and then he started making kissy noises at the camera and Oli started
chanting, “No, no, no” as if Niall was right there with him, attacking him in person.

“These are for both of you,” Niall said. “Get in here Lou.”

The kissing noises started up again and Louis started laughing, joyful bubbles of it mixing
with the sounds of his best friends.

“Well, Louis,” Patrick started, his face slightly pixelated on the Zoom call. They were
twenty-five minutes into their interview and it seemed to be going alright so far. “Thank you
for meeting with me today. We appreciate your interest in Fisher, Smith & Langley.”

Louis swallowed and wiped his sweaty palms on his trouser legs under the table. He had
taken the interview in his study cubicle, figuring the blank background was about as
professional as he could get. It was now late afternoon and he’d been in his suit all day in
preparation - getting a series of vile looks in each of his classes. Presumably he looked extra
pompous in the fitted blue. Professor Levesque had given him a less than subtle thumbs up
on his way out of class and it had buoyed him through the first awkward minute of the call.

“Of course, I appreciate you taking the time to speak with me about the Summer
Associateship and that you’re interested in me as a candidate.”

“Your first semester results are very promising, as well as the recommendation letter we
received as part of your application. It seems you’re making an impact at the University of
Florida already.” Patrick had been reading from his notes, but looked up to smile at Louis. “I
just want to be certain you would be prepared to live in Boston this summer? Typically our
applicants are more local.”

Louis nodded at the webcam on his laptop. “I have a mate who has graciously offered me his
couch for the entire summer.”

Patrick smiled generously, like maybe Louis’ words had been funny, but he wasn’t going to
bother laughing at them.

“And what are your dates of availability?”

“The second week of May through to the second week of August.”

Patrick made a note on his paper. “We don’t typically have summer associates start until after
Memorial Day, but getting you in sooner could be great.”

Louis swallowed hard around the hope in his throat.

“Absolutely, our exam period ends on the 9th. I could be available anytime after that.”

Patrick gave him a half sort of smile. “And are there any other questions you have for me?”

“I don’t think so,” Louis said, wiping his hands on his trousers again. “But if I think of any,
would it be alright to email you?”

“Yes, of course. We intend to have a decision made by mid-March. I’ll be reaching out to you
at that time.”

“Excellent, thank you again for the opportunity.”

“It was nice to meet you, Louis. Good luck in the rest of your semester.”

Louis shot him his most brilliant smile. “Thank you again.”

Patrick said farewell and ended the Zoom call. When the screen went blank he collapsed
backwards into his chair with a heavy sigh.

The interview request had come in on Monday afternoon and he’d spent the last day and a
half sweating through his clothes about it. When the application came attached with a
personal recommendation from a law school buddy of one of the firm’s partners, as well as a
formal, written one, maybe it got bumped up the list somehow. Regardless, he was grateful.

On Friday, he had another interview scheduled with one of the local judges, but the law office
was the one he was banking on. It was a better opportunity for after graduation.

Which meant it mattered more, hence the sweating and the general freaking out of it all.

During the interview, he’d put his phone on silent and checking it now showed he still hadn’t
heard back from Niall on how his Galentine’s party had gone. Which probably meant his plan
had gone tits up and he was sulking it off.

Louis tapped his thumb against his phone screen a couple times, thinking. The skin around
his nail was red from how much he’d been worrying it the last couple days.

The thing was - it was February 14th.

Was it wrong to spend it with Harry? It’s not like they’d be valentines. It’s not like it’d be
anything romantic. But a shag, to work off the last of his nervous energy? That was probably
fine, right?

Harry

Louis: what’re you up to?

While he waited for Harry to respond, he packed up his laptop and books. Even if Harry
wasn’t free, he wasn’t getting much more done in there this afternoon. The whole place stank
of his anxiety and he couldn’t stand it any longer. His phone vibrated loudly on the wooden
desk.

Harry

Louis: what’re you up to?

Harry: Just finished practice
Louis: i was just getting ready to leave
Louis: if you didn’t have any plans tonight
Harry: I’ll be there in 5

Louis locked the door behind him and weaved through the library with a bit of pep in his
step. The sour stomach he’d had earlier had calmed with the interview under his belt, his
heart rate finally calming to a normal level.

Stepping outside into the warm sun, he breathed deeply in the fresh air. He was only just
exhaling when Harry’s Range Rover pulled up in front of him. Louis opened the passenger
door and tossed his bag onto the floor.
“Well don’t you look nice today,” Harry said, smiling at him with one hand on the wheel and
the radio playing low under his words.

“Thanks, sunshine. Just finished my interview.” Louis climbed in and closed the door behind
him, fighting the urge to lean over and kiss him. A month ago he might have, but now, in a
post-Mike-knows world, he was hesitant. Things were okay between them now, less tense
and when they were alone in his room, things were totally normal. So, he didn’t want to push
it.

“For the firm in Boston?” Harry asked and Louis nodded in confirmation. As he pulled the
car into drive, Harry asked, “How’d it go?”

“I think it went really well actually. He seemed to like me at least, which I think is half the
battle.”

“I’m sure you charmed him.” Tossing him a smile, he turned onto the main road.

“I didn’t even have to offer to suck his cock for the job.”

“Yet,” Harry drawled.

It was loud - the laugh that barreled out of his chest. Harry turned to grin at him, his bottom
lip pulled between his teeth and the dimples in his cheeks gently sloping in.

“Good call,” Louis said around his laughter. “Should be open to all opportunities.”

Harry snorted, the same smile still on his face. Louis loved to see it, would love to see it
always.

When they pulled into his driveway, Mina’s car was as absent as ever, and they both moved
towards the front door. Louis unlocked it and turned to ask Harry if he wanted something to
eat, but Harry grabbed his waist and they met lips first in a messy, heated kiss.

His hands were pulling at Louis’ clothes before the first swipe of his tongue hit Louis’,
before the first breath was passed between them. Louis tangled his fingers in Harry’s hair,
dragged him down and then hooked his arm over Harry’s shoulder, pulling himself higher.
Harry’s hands slipped down his sides and under his thighs, tugging Louis’ up by the back of
them until he hooked his own legs around Harry’s hips.

“Fuck, I hate that you’re so strong,” Louis said against his mouth.

“That’s the biggest lie you’ve ever told me.” Harry sucked on his lip and then drew him back
into a kiss.

Breathless, Louis said, “Not true. I think I said I liked swimming.”

Harry laughed and Louis felt it against his lips, under his fingertips, shaking underneath his
thighs. Then Harry bit his jaw in retaliation, but Louis moaned into the touch.
They kissed again and Harry started walking through the house towards Louis’ room. It felt
so reminiscent of the first time, the two of them blind and all over each other, but this time,
Harry could find his door without looking, without breaking apart from him. The familiarity
of it had another wave of arousal crashing through him, frothing against the underside of his
skin like the surf on the shore.

Harry’s hands were tight on his arse, holding him up, but also holding him to Harry’s chest.
Between them was the flurry of breaths, the hard plane of Harry’s abdomen and, underneath
that, his pulse jumping with every twist of Louis’ fingers in his hair and swipe of his tongue.
It was delicious, wonderous to be pressed up right against him.

When they pushed into his room, Harry kicked the door closed and then dropped him onto
the bed, so startlingly that his lips were still seeking Harry’s as the bed bounced him up once.

Laughing, he said, “Fuck off.”

But Harry was already tugging off his own clothes, shoes getting kicked aside. So Louis
started doing the same thing, until they were both naked.

Harry reached down to stroke himself, his eyes on Louis as he did so. It had him leaning
back, angling his hips. Letting him see. Had his own hard cock swaying under the attention.
As if it was trying to put on a show.

He gave Harry a minute to touch, to look, before he hooked his ankle around Harry’s knee
and yanked him forward. Falling with a yelp, his hands scrambled to catch himself on the
mattress while Louis laughed at the glare Harry tossed at him. It was ruined by the smile on
Harry’s face, the fondness in his scrunched up nose.

Turning onto his side, Louis nosed back in to kiss him on the lips.

“Thanks for joining us,” he teased, punctuating his words with a soft kiss at the corner of
Harry’s mouth.

Harry rolled onto his back and tugged Louis with him. He went easily, slipping a knee
between Harry’s legs, their bodies pressed together from belly buttons to thighs. The warmth
between them was a heady thing and Louis sighed at the feeling. It was quiet in his room, just
the whirring of the ceiling fan and the slick sounds of their mouths moving together.

Running a hand down Harry’s chest, he tweaked a nipple and felt Harry’s cock jerk into his
stomach. When he smiled, Harry’s teeth pulled at his lip. His hand slipped further down
Harry’s body, swirling around his belly button and then nails scraping through his light pubic
hair. Harry groaned and kissed him harder.

Louis teased along Harry’s cock and grinned when Harry hissed out a moan, his legs falling
wider, like the simple touch had him opening up. Trailing his lips over Harry’s jaw and down
to Harry’s neck, he ran his tongue over the sharp vein running down the side and wished he
could bite. His hand slipped around Harry and gave him the first sharp pull.

Harry huffed out a moan, shifting his hips like he was asking for more.
“Impatient,” Louis admonished, sucking lightly at his throat, and Harry laughed, brightly and
then cutting off into a groan with the run of Louis’ hands.

“Want your fingers,” Harry mumbled and when Louis looked up at his face he was licking his
lips.

“Thought you didn’t do that during the season?” He kissed Harry on the lips, rubbed his
thumb around the base of his cock and down the side of his balls.

“Just a couple,” Harry mumbled and when he licked his lips again, he licked Louis’ too.
“Miss it.”

Louis kissed him hard then, the words zinging straight through him and had him rutting
against Harry’s hipbone. His skin had to be messy with Louis’ precome, but Harry never
minded a little mess.

They kissed for a few minutes more before he pulled back to grab the lube from his
nightstand drawer.

“You want it on your back or front, baby?”

Harry was gorgeous beneath him with his curls messy on the pillow and the long, tan curve
of his body sloping right down to his cock, hard and leaking against his abdomen. So
stunning it almost looked like it should have been crowned, draped in laurels and presented
like a gift.

With glassy green eyes, he was looking up at Louis, a perfect contrast in the orange pink light
the room was bathed in. Like spring was unfolding on his bed. Everything a hazy pastel
blanketing them. He didn’t want to stop looking at them. Wanted to watch the pleasure rise
and fall with each twitch of his eyelashes and the crinkles by his eyelids.

“Or in my lap?”

“Yeah,” Harry breathed out, moving over on the bed while Louis sat back against the
headboard. He’d only just finished adjusting the pillow behind his back when Harry was
climbing in his lap, straddling Louis’ thighs and leaning in for a kiss.

His hands came up to cup Louis’ jaw, pulling him up and as close as he could. Louis loved
the strain in his neck, the tug of his jaw. They were close enough that their cocks were
rubbing together and then against his stomach with each minor roll of Harry’s hips, timed
with the rhythm of the kiss. It was something to get lost in, he could do it for ages except for
the pleasure bubbling under his skin.

Louis ran his hands around the outside of Harry’s thighs and then curved them around his
arse, teasing a finger down his crack to feel Harry shiver over him. Despite the air con
blowing cold in the room, Harry was still sun warm and soft in his lap. Like the only heat
source in the room and Louis couldn’t get close enough.
Leaning back, he breathed in deeply with his lips just against Harry’s before opening the
lube. He put some on his fingers and Harry slumped towards him a bit, arching his back and
looking down at him with lidded eyes.

Harry shuddered at the first press of his fingertip against his hole - whether that was from it
being too cool or just because he’d been wanting it so much, but Louis relished the tremble in
his limbs.

With a hand on Harry’s hip, he steadied him as he pressed in and then caught his mouth in a
kiss. He moved slowly and Harry matched him with every twist of his lips and swipe of his
tongue. It was a breathless sort of rhythm, one that went to his head quickly. Like he was
under the surface and the only thing real was the weight of Harry in his lap, the heat of him
around his finger and the slickness of his mouth.

He loved it, he could drown in him forever.

Harry started to shift his hips with the movement of his finger, huffing out annoyed breaths
against Louis’ lips. He wanted to laugh at his impatience, could have, maybe, if he didn’t find
it so hot. A moment later he teased a second finger against his rim before working it in
against the first.

“Yes,” Harry hissed, pulling his mouth off Louis’, a trail of spit connecting them still. He
slumped forward more, bracing a hand on the headboard above Louis’ head and moved with
the pace of Louis’ finger. All Louis could do was watch him with his jaw slack. The sheen on
his chest, the golden light warming his dark hair, bathing his whole body in fiery sunlight.
Glowing on top of him. Like the sun was in his lap, moaning his name and clenching over
him.

He scissored his fingers, twisted them, and Harry moaned long and pretty on top of him.

Louis mouthed at his collarbone, licking at the sweat just starting to accumulate there. The
urge to mark him up, suck a bruise to claim him as his, burned at him, but he couldn’t and he
wasn’t, so instead he massaged over Harry’s prostate again and again to hear him huff out
moan after moan.

“Sounds so good, baby,” Louis said against his skin. He was so hard between them, just
getting the barest friction from Harry’s cock bumping against his. It was barely a concern
with Harry falling apart on top of him.

Harry leaned back and Louis looked up to see his lips bitten bright pink and a flush running
from his cheeks down his neck. There was a lightness to his eyes that could have only come
from a pleasure spiral.

“Give me the lube,” Harry said, voice gone raw and Louis was lost in the sound of it for a
moment before he reacted. The bottle had slipped halfway behind his back and he fished it
out while trying not to disrupt the rhythm of his other hand. But when he twisted his back, he
must have twisted his whole body and Harry yelped, moaned and planted both hands on
Louis’ shoulders to pant over him.
“Whoops,” he laughed and Harry tossed him a glare that was rendered ineffective by the
wrecked look of the rest of him.

Taking the lube from his hand, he squirted some on his own before reaching down and
gripping both their cocks between his hand. Louis jerked up into it, the cool grip of him, tight
with Harry’s cock right alongside his. It felt so good after leaking against his own belly while
Harry writhed atop him.

Harry’s stroke was just faster than Louis’ fingers and Louis was pretty that was on purpose
and he was trying to rush them along. He was riding back against Louis’ fingers, thrusting
forward into his own fist and breathing heavily with his mouth against Louis’ forehead.

“Slow down,” Louis said, biting into Harry’s shoulder, feeling the muscle work under his
tongue.

“Hurry up,” Harry countered, speeding up his hand. It shot through him, the slick pleasure of
his hand. He had half a mind to let Harry pull him off fast and dirty. It was so good, but
instead he slowed his fingers nearly to a full stop.

Harry whined on top of him, hips still chasing the movement, hand still moving fast. He
leaned back, grinding down, but his hand mirrored Louis’ pace with long, firm pulls. So tight
it made his head dizzy.

“That’s it,” Louis said, resuming the same pace. Harry whined again as Louis’ ground his
fingers against his prostate.

Leaning forward, their lips reconnected, dirty and messy, while they got lost in sensation.

It wasn’t much longer until Harry’s lips froze, his tongue still on Louis’ lip and a shudder
worked through his whole body as his orgasm crested. He spilled over his own hand, onto
Louis’ cock, and up his stomach. The warmth of it pulled a moan from Louis, his eyes
fluttering as he hurtled to the edge.

His orgasm was sweet when it crawled up his spine and when he came he felt Harry smile
against him, pleased, about dragging it from him. They kissed as they came down, kissed
when Louis’ fingers slipped from his arse and kissed when Harry’s hand let their cocks go.
Kissed as they both softened and it turned slow and sweet and sleepy.

Finally, Harry sat back, come and lube dripping off his hand, a lazy smile on his face and
said, “I might rinse off.”

Louis hummed, feeling so sated he’d prefer to never move again, but if Harry was getting up
anyway.

“I’ll join you.”

Harry’s smile deepened, the dimples pressed so far in his face Louis thought they must hurt.
With his clean hand he thumbed at one, Harry turning his cheek into the touch.
“Let’s get you clean, sunshine,” Louis said, his words oozing warmth. “Let me make you
dinner after.”

Harry nodded, leaned forward to kiss him once more and then stood unsteadily off the bed.

After their shower, Louis made a vegetable risotto and baked salmon. He played it off like
he’d just had the ingredients in the fridge, but he’d gone shopping specially for this. So, he
could make Harry a nice meal and somehow say the things with food he couldn’t say with
words.

They brought their plates to his room and ate on the bed, first side by side and then with
Louis straddling Harry’s lap so they could face each other when they spoke. To keep that
intimate bubble they’d built around themselves from popping.

“You really are such a good cook,” Harry said, taking another bite.

“Thanks, baby.” Louis gave him a kiss on the cheek and felt his jaw move under his lips as he
chewed. “Feels like ages since I’ve made anything for you.”

In a way, he’d missed it. Cooking had always felt like a chore, like something he’d been
forced to learn to keep his sisters from starving. To help his mum. To be a Good Son.

But he liked the way Harry blushed when Louis handed him a dish he’d made. The way his
tongue curled around the fork to get the flavor off. The scraping sound at the bottom of the
plate when everything was gone, but he was trying to make sure he’d gotten all of it.

It had him itchy in his skin in a way he liked. Had him looking up recipes that he thought
Harry would like. Googling the kind of meals elite athletes ate and when. How to nourish
him in the way his body needed.

He was so embarrassed by his search history, that he’d started using private browsers to look
up swimming related content.

“What are your plans this weekend?” Harry asked, swallowing another forkful.

“Woodser on Friday.” Louis took a bite, relished the flavor in his mouth. He thought about
kissing Harry, tasting it on his lips, the fat, the spices, the way his tongue would surely tingle.

Harry wrinkled his nose. “It’s your first Woodser, right?”

Louis nodded. Far as he could tell, it was a school sponsored event to get drunk in the woods.
Sounded better than most of the mixers he’d had to go to over the last several months, at
least.

“You ever been?” Louis asked.

“I snuck onto the bus Freshman year with a girl I was seeing. She was an Alpha Phi.
Woodsers are more of a Greek Life thing, but my biggest tip is to be drunk before you go.
Otherwise you’re just cold sober in the woods with House music blasting.”
Louis laughed, but his heart snagged on girl I was seeing Freshman year.

“Thanks for the tip.” Louis smiled down at him.

Harry had finished his plate and pushed it onto his bedside table, half on top of an open
notebook and teetering against the side of the novel Louis had been “reading” for six months.
With his hands free, they came to rest on Louis’ thighs. They had both pulled on gym shorts
when they’d gone to make food, his were ugly blue mesh with a faded out Hall Cross School
logo on them. They looked nice with Harry’s fingers just up the side of them.

Louis took another bite and tried to ignore the heat of Harry’s hands. The burn of arousal
never seemed to go away between them. It felt like he was always ready to come alive under
Harry’s palms, mold himself to Harry’s body, and see where the current between them took
him.

“Hey, I feel like you hardly said anything about how your interview went.”

Harry was looking up at him with interest, with care, and he swallowed the bite of food
heavily.

“It was good, really good I think.” Louis pushed his nearly finished plate on top of Harry’s.
“This year doesn’t matter as much, as long as I’m doing something. But it’d be great to get
into a firm now. If they like me, then next year is set, and hopefully I’ll have a job after
graduation.”

“It’s wild to me thinking years ahead like that.”

Louis rested a hand on Harry’s shoulder and played with the hair at the base of his neck,
giving him a small smile. “Is it? You’ve been working for years for this summer.”

“Well,” Harry said, bashfully. “Feels different.”

“It’s all the work right? Focusing on a goal, getting there.”

Harry nodded. “Yeah, I guess that’s true. Do they, like, do what you want to do? I don’t know
if that makes sense. But not all types of law are the same, right?”

“Right, that’s right.” Louis adjusted on his lap, getting more comfortable. “I’m not really sure
what I’m interested in yet. There’s a lot of money in corporate law, which I can’t lie is
appealing. But there’s something hot about litigation.”

Harry ran his bottom lip through his teeth. “Something really hot, I’d say.”

Laughing, he tugged on Harry’s hair in a teasing way. “Can feel kinda soulless though, I
think. Both of those really, which is maybe fine. Sometimes I feel like what does it really
matter anyway.”

He shrugged off the pang that ran through him.

“Matters how you feel about it, I think,” Harry said, squeezing his thigh and then pressing his
hand over Louis’ heart. “My mom always says not to dim yourself for someone else.”

“She’s pretty smart,” Louis said, thumbing over the blush on Harry’s cheek.

“Yeah,” he laughed. “And you’re pretty bright, right here. It’d be a shame to see that fade
out.”

Louis looked down to where Harry’s hand was still touching his chest, just over his heart.
The heat of his palm sunk into Louis’ skin, his heartbeat steady under the weight of it all.

“So are you, sunshine.”

He moved his hand from Harry’s cheek to the same spot on his chest, pressed his palm flat to
his skin and felt Harry’s heart beat through him. They sat like that for a minute longer, a
minute more, to really appreciate the constant, thrumming connection breathing into the
space between them.

Louis and Liam threw back three vodka shots in succession in the parking lot before getting
on the bus. Louis chased his with a Redbull and drank the rest of it on their way to the open
air barn the Woodser was hosted at. Between his knees he had a water bottle that was mostly
vodka and a splash of juice that sloshed against the side on every single bump the bus went
over. It was nearly enough to get him feeling a bit seasick as he and Liam were tossed against
each other over and over again.

The vodka was just kicking in as the bus rolled down the dirt road towards the barn. He
flopped in his seat and into Liam next to him, both laughing as they nearly fell out of their
seats.

The bus was dark, just the floor runners glowing orange between their feet and the snapped
glow sticks people were wearing as headbands and bracelets shining neon bright. When the
bus parked, everyone was jostling to get off. Louis already heard the DJ blasting music, so
loud he could have sworn the bus was shaking from it.

“Ready for this?” Liam asked, a grin wide on his face.

“Let’s get fucked up.”

Liam laughed, slinging an arm around his shoulder and then pulling him down the aisle and
off the bus. Louis went tripping after him, hands gripping his waist, and laughing into his
armpit.

The barn was lit up in fairy lights and spilling law students from every year out onto the lawn
with a song he’d never heard of trailing out after them. He made his way inside with Liam.
Everyone they passed had drinks in their hands, things they’d clearly manufactured at home
to bring. Big water bottles or even gallon jugs of mixed drinks that people were guzzling
from.

The two of them entered the throng, pulled along by the bodies until they found themselves at
the back of the dance floor.

The vodka was buzzing under his skin and the music was buzzing in his ears. Loud enough it
numbed almost everything out. All the stress, all the worries. All the people here he didn’t
give two fucks about.

A few girls from his section were next to him and the four of them wordlessly got together
and over the next several hours they drank and danced as a group. Leaning on each other and
slipping on the grass, the wooden boards, and laughing as they tripped up.

“Fuck, I’m fucked,” Cara or Clara or Susanna said. He wasn’t really sure and didn’t really
care.

“I’m fine,” Louis slurred, his arm slung over Liam’s shoulder, again or maybe still. Everyone
burst out laughing and Louis smiled lazily at the group.

He was sure he could feel his blood sloshing through his veins, his head rising up into the sky
and a sourness in his belly. If he had another drink it’d probably fix him.

The DJ yelled it was the last song and they all splashed together on the dance floor. Susanna
or Elena, but definitely not Mina, had her arms around his neck, her pelvis against his and
was grinding in a messy way that said she didn’t know where her head was.

Louis hardly cared, his voice hoarse, his head light, but his body heavy. They drank the last
of their alcohol and the fruit punch flavored vodka was so strong he almost gagged before
rubbing it into his gums with his tongue.

He hadn’t felt this out of his mind, this brain dead in forever. Maybe since Harry fucked him
stupid in December. God, he’d missed it.

When the song ended they all made their way back towards the buses. Definitely not Mina,
but could have been Cara or Sierra left a sloppy lip gloss stained kiss on his cheek and Louis
tripped up the bus steps behind Liam. They fell into a seat halfway back and he ended up
with a leg tossed over Liam’s and his head against the bus window. It was halfway down and
blowing cool air around the top of his head.

“How’re you getting home?” Liam asked and the words swooped and splashed against his
brain for a minute before Louis could compute what he’d asked.

He stuck his tongue between his teeth and fished his phone out of his pocket. “Gonna see if
Harry will come and get me.”

Harry
Louis: cum n get me

He stared at his text, knew it felt wrong, but couldn’t figure out how to fix it. Liam snorted a
laugh over his shoulder and flipped him the bird.

Over the seat in front of him, Josh popped his head over the top. His fringe was sweaty and
shoved the wrong way on his forehead, his whole face red from alcohol.

“Tomlinson, saw Mariana was all over you.”

And fuck, that was her name, wasn’t it?

“Are you jealous?” Louis asked, then laughed, at himself mostly, but the sour look on Josh’s
face said he took it personally.

But Josh bounced back and joked, “Heard she’s had it bad for you all semester.”

Next to him Liam snorted and Louis rolled his eyes.

“’S got a boyfriend, doesn’t he?”

“Shhh,” Louis sounded, harshly, pressing a finger to Liam’s lips and then laughing loudly at
the wide eyed look Liam had on his face.

He was so busy laughing at it he didn’t notice when Josh turned around, when the bus pulled
back into the city, the way the air that rushed over him from the window had gotten colder.

They turned into the parking lot, the loud music on the bus cut out abruptly and the whole
space turned to laughter and jeers in a moment. Not until he was climbing down the stairs of
the bus did he remember to check for a text back.

Harry

Louis: cum n get me

Harry: Are you wasted?
Harry: I’ll be there in 10

He was smiling when he looked up and spotted Harry’s car across the law school’s car park.
Louis was still holding onto Liam with his other arm, keeping himself upright and steady. His
legs felt a bit like jelly, like the mold was collapsing around them and they’d fall to mush on
the pavement.

“Liam, my sunshine is here.”

He pointed across the lot or at least he tried to.

“It’s, like, midnight, dummy,” Liam said, but dragged him across the car park. “Is that
Harry?”
“Yeah, my sunshine baby,” he slurred out and then laughed loudly. Sunshine Baby. Like the
“Teletubbies”, like Harry grinning down at him from the sky.

“You’re so fucked right now,” Liam teased.

When they got to the car, Harry was watching them bemused from the driver’s seat. Liam
pulled open the door and pushed Louis inside. He fell halfway onto the seat, trying to work
out how to get his legs in the car, on the floor, not on the seat, nor over the gear shift.

“Here’s your boyfriend,” Liam said and then laughed. “The jungle juice absolutely fucked
him.”

“Shhh!” Louis said, again. Liam had to stop saying that word out loud. It was for him and the
inside of his head only. He went to press his finger to Liam’s lips again, but he batted Louis’
hand away and then closed the door on him.

Turning to Harry, his head felt squishy soft, like his smile was melting down his face, but it
felt fucking great. And he knew his brain wasn’t right, wasn’t computing properly, because
he didn’t realize until they pulled into his driveway that the look on Harry’s face was a frown
and not a smile.

Harry turned the car off, but didn’t move. After a minute Louis started giggling.

“H, baby, I don’t think I can walk right.”

That last chug of juice he’d had was really settling in. He tried to move his legs, but they
didn’t do much. His whole body was tingling, singing, blubbering over itself.

He was laughing so loudly he didn’t hear Harry sigh. Or he did, but Louis didn’t care. It
didn’t register.

Harry pulled him out of the car and Louis clung to his side like a koala, holding on to him
and dragging his feet so far behind him he was almost sure they were still right outside the
car. After swinging him up the stairs and onto the porch, Harry propped him against the door.
Warm hands pat him down and Louis was swaying forward as if for a kiss when Harry pulled
the keys out of Louis’ pocket and then manhandled him inside.

He was going to say something, he really was, once his brain caught up. Once it finally came
inside. He was pretty sure it was still in the car, maybe even in the car park of the law school,
but as soon as it got home, he’d have something witty to say. Something smart.

Harry dropped him onto the bed and Louis turned to say it, finally, but his eyes closed and he
was asleep before he could.

+
The sun was burning behind his eyelids when he woke the next morning. His mouth was dry
and tasted like something awful. And his head, God, his fucking head, it felt like it was on
fire. His whole body really.

Rolling over with a groan, he pressed a hand to his head and tried to think back to the night
before. It was all a blur of fairy lights and spiked fruit punch. Tasted worse than ass on his
tongue now.

“Are you awake?”

He jumped, just slightly, at Harry’s voice.

“Fuck,” Louis whined, rolling onto his back, trying to open his eyes, but promptly shut them
again. His alcohol soaked brain had forgotten Harry was here. Forgotten he’d texted him the
night before. He hardly remembered getting in his car, the drive home, getting in bed.

“There’s water and Advil on the table,” Harry said, sounding like he was across the room,
maybe even in the doorway, but Louis wasn’t going to open his eyes to check.

“Thanks, baby,” Louis mumbled.

“Don’t call me baby.”

Louis blinked rapidly and finally, finally, got his eyes open. As if the sourness in Harry’s
voice stung through him like a jolt of adrenaline or caffeine, just enough of a boost to get him
really paying attention.

He pushed himself up against the headboard and saw Harry standing by his open door with
his arms crossed in front of him. There was a frown set deep in his face, that little wrinkle
between his eyebrows was nearly a slash down the middle of his face.

“What?”

Louis took a big gulp from the water glass and, after he swallowed, shoved the pills in his
mouth then downed the rest of the glass. By the time he finished, Harry still hadn’t spoken.
His jaw was clenched so hard he looked like was going to pop a blood vessel.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Harry said, glowering at him. Louis pressed a hand to his forehead to try to
combat the pounding in his skull. “But it’s kind of fucked up how you keep telling people
we’re dating. Last I checked, that’s not what this was.”

“Can we do this some other time?” Louis asked. It felt like his head was on fire and he didn’t
really want to get into it with Harry when he already felt awful. “I feel like shit.”

“Liam called me your boyfriend last night,” Harry said, barreling right through his plea.

“Okay? And?” His stomach was churning through the stale alcohol in it. He could feel
himself start to sweat and he yanked off his t-shirt from the night before. It smelled
disgusting - exactly like how he felt, like something used up and left out too long, like
something gone foul. “I haven’t told him shit. He was probably just taking the piss.”

“Sure,” Harry scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Just like you didn’t tell Mike shit.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry,” Louis said, exaggerating the words sarcastically. “I just wanted you to get
out of that situation unscathed. I’ll not try to help next time. We can both just freeze instead.”

Harry’s nostrils flared in annoyance and Louis huffed as he slouched on the bed. Louis was
sharp in an argument when he was feeling well, when he felt like shit he could be a
downright arsehole.

“I don’t need your help!” Harry practically shouted and Louis shrank back against the
headboard. “I didn’t ask for it.”

“Christ, okay. I get it.”

Harry turned away from him and Louis watched the vein on his neck jump with every clench
of his jaw.

“Why do you always have to push everything?”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“You’re just always shoving your way through things. Through people, conversations. Like
you’re so worried about making something happen you don’t look to see what you walked
over in the process.”

Harry’s words burned through him, and had the bile in Louis’ stomach churning.

“You don’t know what you’re fucking on about, mate,” Louis spat back, ignoring the buzzing
Harry’s words had lit in his head. Harry flinched, at his words or his tone, he wasn’t sure.
Didn’t really care at this point. “Besides you’re so, like, afraid of moving. Just standing still
letting everything happen to you. So you would think anything is ‘too fast’.”

Harry was shaking his head, the frown on his face twisting into something ugly. Louis wasn’t
sure how they got here, but the anger, the annoyance, was beating at the back of his hangover.
The victim of that was his filter.

He continued on, so wrapped up in it he didn’t know when to quit. “It’s like you refuse to just
be yourself. And I don’t mean about coming out - fuck that. I mean it’s like you’re so fucking
afraid to have dreams in case someone notices. So, like, I don’t know, embarrassed for people
to see how smart you are, how funny you are. You’re just living your life in this paralyzed
little stand still.”

“Wow,” Harry said, but Louis wasn’t done.

“You just - you act like-,” Louis took a deep breath and then breathed out, “your stupid
fucking room is all white blank walls.”
“What does that have to do with anything?”

“It’s just how you go through life! You’re this empty room for everyone to project an idea on
to. Of who they want you to be or who they’d like to have around. It fucking pisses me off.”

“Well, isn’t that what you’ve just done?”

The words were like a slap across the face. So far from the truth they burned him. He could
feel the sting of them down to his bones.

“No, Harry,” Louis said, his words sounding as tired as he felt. “Sometimes I think I’m the
only person at this school who has even really seen you.”

Harry curled his lips in annoyance.

“You don’t know anything,” he finally settled on.

“Sure,” Louis said in sarcastic agreement. “I don’t know anything. If that’s what you need to
believe.”

He pulled his legs up on the bed in front of him. There was a burning little ache starting in his
chest and he wished he had some way to extinguish it. Extinguish the whole conversation.

“I need a break from this,” Harry said, waving his hand towards Louis, his messy floor, his
unmade bed. “I can’t deal with it.”

“What’s this?”

“This! This thing where we were supposed to be fucking around and now everyone in my life
thinks you’re my boyfriend and I told you, I told you, I don’t have time for this. I don’t want
it.”

“I have never, not once, told someone we were dating. I’ve never told anyone about you at
all.” Harry scoffed and Louis rolled his eyes. “But it’s not my fault that people have eyes,
Harry. That people see us together, like Liam, like your mum, and think we might actually be
something.”

“What’s my mom got to do with anything?”

Louis gave him a flat stare.

“She saved me a seat at your meet. She invited me to dinner. She asked for my number and
texts me progress on her knitting projects. Come on, Harry.”

“Don’t text my mom,” he said, his voice annoyed.

“Well I’m not going to leave her on read.” Louis rolled his eyes.

“So you knew that this was happening and, what, you just didn’t care?”
“Why would I bring it up just to hear us both agree we don’t have time for the thing we’re
already doing,” Louis shrugged, but it was in the sharp way he did when he was so annoyed
that his muscles all felt like live wires under his skin. Like any sudden movement would have
him reacting in an instant. “I don’t have you be your boyfriend if ‘you don’t have time’ or
whatever excuse you want to use, but yeah, sorry, you’ve felt like mine for ages.”

“This isn’t-” Harry started and then cut himself off.

Louis filled the silence he left. “I’m not asking you for anything, when have I ever asked you
for anything, hm?”

Harry stood there with his arms crossed, the muscles in his biceps jumping like he was
feeling the same jittery feeling Louis was. Like he was just as on edge, just as ready to fight.

Finally, he said, “I need a break. SEC’s are this week and then NCAA’s and then it’s a rush
towards Olympic Trials and I have things going on in my life outside of this.”

“You keep calling it ‘this’ like I’m not a person.”

Harry let out a huff of annoyance. “Fine, you. You’re a distraction that I can’t afford right
now.”

Louis worked his jaw, chewed on what he wanted to say next, and tried to ignore the burning
behind his eyes. How he could feel his cheeks were hot and the way he wanted to blink back
tears.

“Then leave,” he spat, shrugging as if he didn’t care. Shrugging as if he didn’t feel those
words all the way through him. Like it wasn’t the worst thing Harry could have said to him.

Harry stood there for a moment longer. Maybe he was expecting Louis to argue more, to not
let him go. But Louis wasn’t going to stand in his way. Not after the things they both said, not
with the way he felt just a fraction of a second away from throwing up all down the front of
himself.

“Go, Harry. Move, for once.” His words were mean, he knew they were, but he didn’t care.

And Harry finally unlaced his arms, gave Louis one last scathing look, and walked through
the door.

Louis didn’t move until he heard the front door slam.

Then his legs fell to the bed, his hands to his side, and the emotion welled up. He still felt like
absolute rubbish from his hangover. Like even if the pills wanted to kick in they wouldn’t
have with the argument they’d just had. He didn’t even really understand what had happened.

Pulling out his phone, he texted his friends:

Niall & Oli

Louis: bring on the I told you so’s.

The rest of Saturday was a waste. He spent it curled up in bed cursing Harry out and
wallowing in how much it fucking sucked. All the way through him he could feel that there
was something so very right about Harry for him. But maybe he’d been delusional in
believing Harry felt it too.

On Sunday, he dragged himself to his study room. When Liam knocked on the door he
ignored it. Held his breath and pretended he wasn’t there.

Monday rolled by and Louis dragged himself to his classes and studied like normal, but he
didn’t feel good about it. Didn’t feel motivated. He hated feeling like he was half-arsing his
life and as if a bit of doubt had creeped in.

Like Harry’s words were still rattling around in his head and twisting themselves into
something uglier. Something meaner.

When he looked at his calendar for Tuesday, the time blocked out for the SEC swimming
meet was still on there. He hovered over the delete icon, debating. Just the sight of it had his
fingers shaking.

Could he watch it? Did it matter? Would Harry even care? And did Louis care if he did?

Was watching it for Harry? Or was it how he cared?

He sat there, alone, in the clawing silence and ran through it in his head over and over. Until
he didn’t make a decision at all, just closed the app and decided to wait until the next day to
decide.

The walk home was slow. He played music as loud as he could to try to drown out his
thoughts, drown out his feelings, pretend he was nothing at all.

Out of habit he cooked. Like that was the process when he felt like less than nothing - boil
the water, make the sauce, plate the food. But he didn’t eat it, just pushed it around the plate
until it had gone cold. Only then did he put a sticky note on the leftovers for Mina to eat.

When he climbed into bed that night he couldn’t stop staring at those last text messages him
and Harry had shared. They were fine. It was supposed to be fine.

The next day he crawled through his schedule again. One step at a time. And when he was in
his study room at three pm and the only thing left on his calendar was the meet, he stared at it
until his eyes went cross.
Until he made a decision.

Harry was a fucking idiot, but that didn’t mean Louis didn’t still care about him.

Harry could be a prick, but that didn’t mean that Louis didn’t still desperately want his
dreams to come true. For him to succeed, for all his hard work to not be for nothing.

And if all that was true then the decision was made for him.

He pushed out of his chair and left his work behind, weaving through the desks in the library
and ignoring every single look. When he was outside, the sun was blindingly bright and he
shielded his eyes as he rounded the building. He walked until he reached the bench he always
liked to sit on, the one that had barely any foot traffic. Where he sometimes FaceTimed Niall
and Oli.

His thumb hovered over Harry’s phone number.

Rarely did he feel this frozen in indecision. It was such a belief he held, that you had to
decide, you had to choose. It was the only way to succeed, it was the only way to get to
what’s next. If you pushed it off, if you waited, all you were doing was treading water. Then
he’d be like Harry, too paralyzed by fear to move.

And he wasn’t afraid of Harry. He wasn’t afraid of the way he felt about Harry.

Maybe he needed to show that.

He wasn’t a distraction, he wasn’t a burden.

He knew he wasn’t.

His thumb pressed down and then the phone was ringing. And ringing. He hadn’t expected
Harry to answer this close to the meet. They were probably in warm ups, getting dialed in.
Maybe all of this was pointless and a waste of breath, but on the off chance it wasn’t he had
to make the call.

It went to voicemail. When the tone went, he started to speak.

“Hi sunshine. I know we left things weird, I know we said things that…” he trailed off, not
wanting to get into it. That wasn’t the point. He took a deep breath and started again.

“You’ve got your big meet in a bit. I know how important it is to you. I just wanted to say
good luck. That you’re the most spectacular thing in the water. When I watch you swim, and
I will be, I can’t take my eyes off of you. I hope that you believe you can win because I sure
as hell do. I can feel all that greatness just waiting to burst out of you. You shine brighter than
everything out there, sun. I just… I hope you can see it.”

Hanging up, he looked at the phone in his hand, the screen gone black.

Had that been a good idea? He wasn’t sure.

But he felt lighter from it, like he needed to counterbalance the nasty things he’d said on
Saturday. He needed Harry to know. That he never could look away, even when Harry was
bright enough to burn.

Louis stood up off the bench, wiped his sweaty hands off on his jeans and walked back
inside. He had a meet to watch.
 March

Louis didn’t hear from Harry. Not after the meet, not for the next week. All of a sudden
February rolled into March and it had been two weeks since their argument. There wasn’t
anything more that he could say without being exactly the person Harry accused him of
being, so he had to wait. It was driving him a little nuts, to the edge.

Because of that, he was avoiding Liam on campus, avoiding texts and calls from Niall and
Oli, and avoiding Mina in the house. But all that left him was himself. Alone in his room
with a phone that never rang with the right number on the screen.

He stood in the middle of the mess he’d made and realized there was one thing he could do,
one thing he could fix.

From his bedside table, he grabbed his Airpods and then pushed them in. But then he froze,
stuck on what to listen to. Stuck for so long he threw his phone on the bed and didn’t play
anything at all.

The noise canceling blocked everything out. There were no birds outside, no sound of the
floor creaking under Mina’s footsteps. Just the sound of his own breathing and the thoughts
inside his head. No distractions.

Picking up the first shirt off the floor, he sniffed it, and then tossed it in the laundry bin,
which sat nearly empty and half leaning out of his closet. He hardly bothered with it. When
he ran out of clothes, usually he just scooped up a bunch from the floor and tossed them in
the washing machine.

But this time he picked up every piece, folding the ones that were still clean and had never
made it back to his drawers when they’d come out of the dryer. He found pens and notebooks
in the mess. Last semester’s text books were half sticking out from under his bed and he
moved them to his barely used desk.

While he was at the desk, he finally put things away in the drawers and cleaned up the
surface of it. There were stacks of mugs that he took to the kitchen to be washed and he
brought his least favorite one back, the one they gave him at orientation, and put all the pens
on his desk inside of it.

It wasn’t fast by any means - cleaning up five months worth of shit he’d spread everywhere.
But it felt good to see each patch of floor open up. To see the books stacked on his desk and
the tea rings wiped off the surface of his bedside table.

Each and every item of Harry’s got tossed onto his bed. Until the pile curved, until it was so
tall that when he stood it came higher than his belly button. There were boxers and shorts and
t-shirts and hoodies. Swim Caps and one pair of goggles. A couple towels, one notebook, half
a dozen Jupiter Swim Club pens. Pieces of Harry he’d collected and refused to give back.

He wasn’t sure what he was meant to do with it all now.

With his headphones in and every noise blocked except himself, he could hear how ragged
his own breathing was. How sharp he sounded on the inhale, nearly a wheeze, so quick he
sounded a bit panicked. Surrounded by just himself, just his own thick emotion, he felt closer
to the edge of it all.

Every last inch of the last five months spread out in front of him to look at. The long nights
of Harry - more than a shag from the very beginning. His closest friend here, his favorite
person to laugh with. The peace that he felt when they were together, like two halves
snapping together.

And no matter what Harry tried to say that wasn’t a projection. It was the sordid truth of the
matter.

He scooped up the clothes and brought them to the laundry room. The least he could do was
wash them, then he could put them away where he didn’t have to look at them. Until he
figured out what the fuck he was going to do to fix it.

When they came out of the dryer he folded everything and sat them on the end of his bed.
Each item in a stack in a line. Sitting against the headboard, he glared at them, willing Harry
to call.

Louis thought maybe he’d get a call when the meet was over, especially with how well Harry
did. He smashed his personal best in the 800m to pieces, then took home the title in that and
the 1650m, cranking out second in the 400 IM. Louis’d been holding white-knuckled onto his
desk as he watched, wishing for Harry to touch first. Wishing to see his face light up in a
smile as he watched the boards to see his times. The announcers called him “promising” and
a “contender” for the trials that summer and Louis relished the words.

But he didn’t call when the meet was over. And he hadn’t called in the time since.

In five seconds his phone would ring, right?

He closed his eyes and counted down.

5, 4, 3, 2, 1.

Nothing. Holding his breath, he gave it an extra second.

His phone started to vibrate on his chest and it startled him so much his whole body jerked.
He let out a yelp and his phone flew off his bed to the floor with a bang.

“Shit,” he cursed. “Fuck.”

Twisting off the bed, he reached down to find it. Thankfully, he’d just spent all morning
cleaning, so it didn’t take nearly as long as it would have yesterday. Finally, he grabbed it,
flipping it around the right way only to see it wasn’t Harry after all.

“Fuck you guys,” Louis mumbled to the screen, Niall and Oli’s names showing under the
caller ID. He swiped to answer it anyway.
They loaded onto the screen and Louis sat back against the headboard again.

“Fucking finally,” Oli said as a greeting. Louis winced. He’d been ignoring them, just a bit,
through his emotional turmoil.

He at least had the decency to look sheepish, saying, “Sorry, sorry. I know.”

Oli rolled his eyes and Niall was sitting back in his chair with a small smile on his face. The
familiar sight of his living room behind him, the sun low in the sky out the window behind
him, causing his hair to glow caramel in the lighting.

“You missed Niall’s news by avoiding us.” Oli had a smug look on his face.

“Wait, what?” Louis leaned toward the screen, his eyes squinting, all his attention finally
shifting off the pile at the end of his bed.

“I thought you wanted to drag it out?” Niall joked. “Make him work for it a bit.”

“Decided I wanted to see the look on his face too badly to wait,” Oli said, grinning at them
through the screen. “Was worth it I think.”

Niall laughed loudly, head thrown back against his couch and Louis pouted at them both. He
hated being left out.

“What news?”

“Did you ever notice Nialler never told us how his set up with Zayn went?”

Louis sat up in bed, suddenly alert. “That’s right you didn’t.”

Niall smirked.

“Well, he told me, last week when you ignored our call.”

“If I’d known we were getting a Zayn update maybe I would have answered.”

“You wouldn’t have,” Oli said, rolling his eyes.

“Whatever,” Louis scoffed. “Give me the news.”

Niall was smirking at him on screen and he could only guess that meant it was good news,
but he was really dragging it out, making Louis wait until finally he cracked.

“For my work party, I wore that same green sweater, to you know, to give it a second
chance.” Louis nodded, it really was a nice sweater. “And I did my hair, it had a lot of height.
Which I knew Zayn would be into.”

“Yeah ‘cause he’s not blind,” Oli added.

“Exactly. I ordered a round of margaritas for the table and when I handed Zayn his he said
‘thanks, I don’t usually like tequila, but I’ll give it a go’ and I knew I was in. We talked all
night. Got his number and everything.”

“As a mates thing?” Louis asked, for clarification.

“Wasn’t sure at the time, but can confirm, definitely not a mates thing,” Niall said in a poor
imitation of his accent. “We met for drinks on Valentine’s Day and push came to shove-”

“Yeah, we know something came,” Oli snickered.

Niall didn’t even look phased, he was basically glowing. “We spent the whole weekend
together. He called me his boyfriend the other day. Life is so fucking good I think I’m willing
to completely look past the crumbs.”

“Not the crumbs!” Louis said, but he thought his voice sounded a little hollow. Niall didn’t
seem to notice because he was laughing on the other end of the call.

It jabbed him hard in the gut to realize while his thing with Harry was crumbling to pieces,
Niall’s love life was finally sorting itself out. He was happy for him, he’d always be happy
for something good to happen to Niall, but he selfishly wished something good might happen
to him.

“I give the crumbs thing a month, tops,” Oli said. “Niall’s gonna be following him around
with a mini vacuum.”

“Could turn that into a kink thing,” Louis offered.

“If it sucks it-”

“No, no, stop it,” Niall said, cutting Oli off. But they were both laughing, warming the space
around him. He didn’t know why he thought he didn’t need this. Why he avoided them, why
he always did that when he felt like shit. Because the minute he stopped, he realized he was a
fucking idiot. And his fucking idiots made everything better.

“I’m really happy for you, Ni,” Louis said, cutting through their laughter. “He seems great
and he is the hottest man alive.”

“God, he really fucking is,” Niall said dreamily.

“Can we actually get a picture now?” Oli asked.

“I’ll send one through later.” Niall gave them both glares. “I don’t trust you two to behave
yourselves.”

“He can’t be that hot,” Oli reasoned. “For me to make a fool of myself. Lou on the other
hand…”

He trailed off and his voice was teasing, but something icky settled in his stomach. Without
really meaning to, Louis said, “Always makes a fool of himself. Right?”
Cringing at himself once it was out, he wished he could shove the words back in. He didn’t
mean them, not really. Or he didn’t mean for someone else to hear them.

“Hey! That’s my best friend you’re shit talking,” Niall scolded him.

“And he only makes a fool of himself when the guys are, like, really hot,” Oli clarified. “So
it’s hardly embarrassing.”

“Hardly,” Louis scoffed, rolling his eyes.

“Are you ready to talk about it?” Niall was leaning forward, the sun now starting to set
behind him, burning purple and pink in the sky. It was so gorgeous, too pretty to hear about
his stupid fight with Harry. He was going to say so, say it didn’t matter, say it was a useless
waste of time to talk about it.

Instead, he said, “Do you think I push too much?”

“Push what?” Oli asked.

“Are you shoving people down there?” Niall laughed.

“No, like… push. Like I can’t let things sit still, push others to do things, shove my way
through like, people and conversations and, I don’t know, everything?”

Niall and Oli were silent for a beat too long. He was certain if they’d been in a room together
the two of them would be having some sort of private conversation with their eyes over the
right way to answer him and he hated that.

“Did Harry say this to you?” Niall asked, his voice careful.

Louis huffed. “Yes, obviously.”

Oli’s face scrunched up. “That’s kind of mean of him.”

“But do you guys agree?” Louis crossed his legs and sat back again. “You can be honest.”

Oli and Niall seemed to be trying to pass a look again before Oli, eventually, was the one to
speak. “Yeah kind of, but I like that about you, if that helps?”

“It’s not that you push in an overbearing sort of way,” Niall started. “But yeah, I mean, you
work really hard. You expect people to put in the same amount of effort as you, into like…
everything.”

“Is that a bad thing?” Louis asked, unsure if he wanted to know the answer.

“No, I don’t think so.’’ Niall said.

“But it can be annoying, I guess, if you aren’t, like, meeting your expectations. You know?”

It burned through him.

“He said I pushed him too much. He said he wasn’t ready and I should have respected that,
but I just felt like he was. I can clearly see it.”

“You want things, like, so fucking much. Like so hard. Does that make sense?” Niall asked.
“You work towards something with a single minded focus that can be really admirable, but
sometimes you lose sight of everything around you. And sometimes that includes how other
people feel about it.”

“Like, when you finished that entire group project with - God what was her name? The red
head with the purple glasses in your French film course? Remember? And you just like cut
her out. That was like, pretty harsh.”

“She wasn’t doing her fair share,” Louis said, shrugging. Acting like the words weren’t
battering his chest, even though they were.

“You didn’t even let her try, Lou. You took over and what you did was great, it’s always
great, but you don’t trust anyone else to add to things.”

“I can do it better,” he argued. “Her work was always sloppy.”

“That’s not the point,” Niall finally cut in. “The point is that you do push, you expect
greatness and you put that at the expense of everything else. In that case her grades. In
Harry’s case? I don’t know.”

His comfort. His happiness. His ability to move through life the way he felt safest.

The emotion was thick in his throat, but he didn’t want to cry. He couldn’t cry.

“You said I contort myself to make a relationship work.”

Oli winced. “I was hoping you would forget about that.”

He was going to laugh, but it came out as a huff.

“You just want things to work,” Niall said, shrugging, but glaring daggers at the screen that
were clearly meant for Oli. “There’s nothing wrong with that.”

“You’re just kind of a hopeless romantic.”

“A hopeful romantic,” Niall corrected. “You really want love to work. Like really, really. You
think you can make it work. Against all odds. Even when the odds are…”

“The other person,” Louis finished.

“Yeah,” Oli finished, lamely.

He looked back at the line of Harry’s things at the end of his bed. They represented the hope
he’d felt with every single piece left behind. The assurance he’d felt that this was the right
thing. The best thing. That he’d been in the right place at the right time to meet the right
person.
Maybe that wasn’t true. Maybe he’d been in a place, at a time, and met a person. The rest
was him, twisting and pushing the narrative to be what he wanted. Because Harry was cute
and Harry was funny and Harry stood still like a boulder in water and let Louis rush around
him.

“I’m sorry,” Niall mumbled through the phone.

“For what? It’s the truth.” Louis’ eyes flicked back to his friends who were both looking at
him with worried eyes. “I’m glad I asked. That I know. I… I don’t know, I just feel dumb.”

“No!” They both protested at the same time.

“That’s not it at all,” Niall objected.

“You’re like - listen, Louis, none of this is bad. It can be bad, I guess. But the flip side is that
you’ll do fucking anything for the things you care about. There is no bounds of what you’ll
do for someone you love and I think that’s pretty fucking awesome.”

“Yeah, exactly,” Niall agreed. “Like, if I committed a murder you would be 100% the first
person I’d call. There’s no doubt in my mind that if you handled it I would never be caught.
Hell, I’d never even be a suspect. You’re the person I’d always want on my side.”

Oli was nodding along on screen and it was the thing that pushed him over the edge. Pushed
the tears over onto his cheeks and he let out a pathetic sounding whine when he wiped them
away.

“No crying!” Oli yelped. “We said we weren’t going to cry over FaceTime anymore!”

A laugh bubbled out of him with another wave of tears falling down his face.

“Thought that rule was just for Niall,” he blubbered.

“I still resent that,” Niall scoffed. “That cheesecake deserved every single one of my tears.
I’d cry about it again. I’d cry about it right now!”

It sent Louis into another laughing fit. The two of them were arguing back and forth and he
knew it was for him, for his benefit. And he just loved them so much. His two idiot best
friends, who would force feed him the truth and then make him laugh until it didn’t hurt so
badly.

So, what? Maybe he was a force of nature, but at least he had two people who didn’t mind
getting swept up in his storm.

+
The call came on a Monday, the first day of spring break. Louis stammered through the
conversation about dates and compensation and contracts with Patrick at Fisher, Smith &
Langley for too long. When they were done, an email came through and he read over
everything in it three times to be sure it was real.

He’d gotten the summer associate position. He’d be in Boston all summer.

It was like a wave of relief crashed over him. The panic, the studying, the sleepless nights
were not for nothing. They were for this.

He wanted to scream it from the top of his lungs, run down the street, write it on every
surface. Instead, he was in his bed, a text book bending awkwardly under his legs and his
laptop burning the skin of his knee. But he held his hand over his chest, felt his heartbeat
slamming away and knew that it was real.

He sent a text in his group chat with Niall and Oli that was mostly exclamation marks, but he
thought it got his point across. He’d tell Liam later that day. They already had plans to study
and eat so many tortilla chips and queso that their bodies gave up entirely. It was going to be
incredible.

There was an undeniable urge to tell Harry. Despite it all, they had been friends. They had
rooted for each other. He wanted him to know that it had worked out, the planning he’d done,
that the practice questions Harry had volleyed at him in bed had paid off. But he wasn’t sure
what to say or how.

So he stared at his contacts until Harry’s name went blurry, until he scrolled and stopped on
someone else.

He pressed to call and it rang only twice before his mum answered.

“Hello, darling,” she said, voice warm as always through the phone. Her accent was a messy
blend of American and English, wisting through each word she spoke, making them all sound
unique. “This is a surprise.”

“Hi mum,” Louis said, picking at the fabric of his sweat shorts. “Hope this isn’t a bad time.”

“No, no,” she said hurriedly. “I just put the twins down for a nap. Just me at home enjoying a
bit of quiet. Perfect timing really.”

“Well, good,” he said, lamely. Talking to his mum always felt hard, but he didn’t really
understand why. He loved her so much, sometimes it hurt to think about. But when everyone
in his life agreed he pushed, it made him realize sometimes, maybe he could also push away.
“I got some good news I wanted to tell you about.”

“Did you?”

“Yeah,” he breathed out. “I got the internship I wanted for the summer. It’s, well, it’s in
Boston. Which will be good because I can stay with Niall for free, you know.”

“That’s wonderful, love.”

“But I won’t be able to come home.”

“Not at all?”

“It starts right when finals end and finishes right before I need to be back for the fall term.”
He shifted uncomfortably. It had always been obvious to him that he wouldn’t be able to go
home, but he’d never said it to her. He’d never made it clear because he didn’t want to hear
the disappointment in her voice.

“Oh,” she said and then tried to recover, but Louis had heard it and his face burned from it.
“It’s just that your sisters miss you.”

“I miss them, too.” He looked down at his feet and tried to figure out how to say what he
meant. How to be the way he was always afraid to be. He rushed to add, “And you.”

It hung for a moment between them, something he never said. He loved his mum, more than
anything really, but it was all twisted up in a lot of resentment and pride and hurt that meant a
wedge was driven between them. He was sure she’d known, that she could have felt it as it
happened. They had slowly drifted apart and the relationship that they’d had when he was
just a boy dried out and wilted with neither of them watering it.

But was that on him? Did the distance grow because he shoved her away and then continued
to? For years and years until there was an ocean between them. Until he had planned a whole
life a continent away. Never called first, hardly answered, and visited in person but twice a
year.

“I miss you too, darling. So much.” He could hear it then, the relief in her voice.

“I’m-” he swallowed hard around the words he always struggled to say. “I’m sorry I don’t
call enough.”

“I know you’re busy with school and everything. I have been too, with work and the kids.”

“Yeah,” he whispered, a burning clawing up his throat. Usually this is when he’d find a way
off the phone. Hang up and not speak to her for a week, maybe even two. But this time he
said, “And how is work?”

He sat back against his bed as she spoke, her familiar accent washing over him, blanketing
him in comfort. He could do this. He could slow down, lower his guard. He could listen, he
could learn.

If it was uncomfortable at first or even hurt a little bit, that would be okay. Usually the things
that were worth it in the end are.

+
He spent spring break studying, getting high with Mina, and eating too much with Liam. It
wasn’t too bad for a week off school. But as it pushed to an end, realization dawned that it
had now been nearly a month since he’d last seen Harry. Since they’d argued and Louis told
him to leave.

He’d not seen even a blur of Harry in the distance in the last month. As if they’d had their
one in a million chance. Like if they hadn’t met at that football game, that he only had a
replacement ticket for, of which he wasn’t even sitting in his assigned seat, then they surely
would have never met at all.

Even if he never saw Harry again and it ended in that frustrating argument, he was still glad
they did.

At least that’s what he kept telling himself.

On Friday morning he woke to a text from an unknown number. With bleary, sleep crusted
eyes he tried to comprehend what he was reading.

Unknown Number

Unknown Number: hey this is mike. H gave me

ur number. Would u be able
to help me with another essay?

He dropped his phone onto his chest and let his arms fall wide, thinking. It didn’t mean
anything, obviously. If Harry had cared, he would have texted Louis himself and asked on
Mike’s behalf. But still, that he gave Mike his number, that he didn’t burn any connection
down between them was curious.

The text stayed open on his phone while he made his breakfast and while he pushed the eggs
around his plate, hardly eating them. He kept it on screen as he showered and eyed it with the
shower curtain half open. While he dressed and finally, after he tugged his trainers on and
had a hand on the doorknob, he felt ready to reply.

Mike

Mike: hey this is mike. H gave me

ur number. Would u be able
to help me with another essay? Louis: sure! i’ll be on campus all
day let me know when

That was good enough, he thought as he walked to school, breathing in the gorgeous mid-
March day. The heat was starting to climb back up, but it was still mild enough he wasn’t
sweating by the time he got to campus.

Just as he was setting his laptop up in his study room Mike texted him back.
Mike

Louis: sure! i’ll be on campus all

day let me know when
Mike: can u meet at 4?
Mike: outside the dining hall
Louis: see you then

He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t nervous. If those damn butterflies in his stomach weren’t
ravaging his insides at being back in Harry’s atmosphere. But he’d also be lying if he said he
didn’t want to see what would happen. To see him again. Even just a glimpse of the back of
his head.

Louis took a deep breath and tried to clear his mind. He had a lot of work to do and the end
of the semester was only a month away.

He pushed his glasses on and got to work.

At ten to four he started to pack up his things. There was an anticipatory, jittery energy
running through him as he worked. All day there had been. Before leaving the room, his
backpack already slung over his shoulder, he took a few deep, calming breaths.

As he walked over to the athlete dining hall he sent a text to the group chat.

Niall & Oli

Louis: might be making a mistake

Harry: wish me luck <3

When he reached the entrance, Mike wasn’t there yet. Still a couple minutes early, he leaned
against the brick wall and fiddled on his phone for something to do with his hands. Standing
out there felt so reminiscent of that very first week of September. Just waiting outside to try
to find a way to sneak in and find Harry, so he could barrel his way into Harry’s life. It had
been exhilarating at the time, fun even, to play around with his own identity, but now it made
him sad to think about.

A few students passed him by and entered, but Louis didn’t make any effort to try to slip in
behind them.

It was another five minutes or so when a shadow passed over him and stopped. He looked up
to see Mike in front of him, an easy smile on his face and his blond hair damp and pushed
back off his forehead.

“Hey, Louis,” he said, tilting his head towards the side towards the door. “You ready?”
“Yeah.” Pushing up off the wall, he watched Mike scan his thumb print on the screen, the
door unlocking, and then he ushered Louis inside. “How’ve you been?”

“Good, just crazy busy, you know?” Louis nodded, but felt the sting of the word busy. “We’re
swimming these, like, insane sets to get ready for NCAAs in a couple weeks.”

“Feeling ready?” He’d never watched Mike swim and in that moment he regretted it. That he
had let his focus shift away from Harry and his homework for a second longer to pay
attention to something else for once.

Mike rolled his shoulders back and then moved them towards a booth on the far wall. For a
moment Louis panicked that he was going to choose the one he and Harry had sat in that very
first night. It would have felt too full circle, too wrong to be brought back around without the
same person sitting on the other side.

“Yeah, really ready,” Mike said, scooting into the booth closest to the buffet line where the
kitchen workers were starting to set up the dinner service. “It’s crazy how the extra work
makes all the difference right at the end.”

Sending him a teasing smirk, Louis said, “Crazy how that goes for your school work as well
as swimming.”

“Touché,” he laughed.

“What are we working on today?”

Mike pulled out his laptop and a notebook from his bag, opening the screen and typing in his
password.

“My tutor, Carolina? She’s meant to be off this week. I felt bad bothering her because she’d
been telling me about the Quinceañera they were having for her little sister and all the prep
they were doing. I had gotten an extension on my midterm for Business Finance, but now it’s
due Monday.”

“Alright, do you have your syllabus or rubric? Just so I can see what we’re working with.”

“Yeah, hold on.” He pushed the laptop towards Louis and then started fishing in his bag.
Louis could see it was only six pages long, double spaced, so it wouldn’t take long to read.
He fiddled with the settings in Word to edit and add suggestions and then Mike handed him
the assignment.

He skimmed it over quickly to get the gist and then read it slower. When he was done he
looked back to the essay with fresh eyes.

“Do you want to watch?” Louis asked.

“Fuck no,” Mike said, laughing. “My favorite podcast dropped a new episode today.”

Mike pulled out his Airpods from his bag and pushed them into his ears, leaning back against
the booth with his eyes closed. Louis watched him for a moment longer, he wasn’t exactly
what Louis expected. Their encounters before had been brief, just long enough for them to be
somewhat comfortable with each other, for Mike to know something about him, but this was
the first time he’d really spent any time with him. Louis understood why Harry liked him. He
was just easy going, relaxed.

Louis worked his way through the essay, reading each paragraph twice to make sure he was
making the right corrections and catching all of the grammatical errors. It was always a bit
slower when he didn’t know a lot about the topic he was reading. But as he went he added
additional suggestions in the margins.

Halfway through, Louis caught Mike’s eyes opening over the top of the laptop and then he
started playing around on his phone. The podcast he’d been listening to must have been
finished. Louis turned back to the screen and got lost in the work again. It was easier to focus
on that than everything else he’d been thinking about for the last month.

When he finished the dining hall was much busier. The dinner rush seemed to have started
and Mike even had two plates full of food in front of him, eating with one hand and still
scrolling on his phone with the other. Louis hadn’t even noticed him get up.

“I think you’re good,” Louis said, blinking a couple times, eyes feeling a bit burned from the
laptop screen. “I left a few notes for you, but I think the overall structure is solid. Also, your
argument seems well researched.”

“Thanks man,” Mike said, his mouth still full with food. Louis twisted the laptop back to him
and Mike leaned forward to look at the screen. “You know, you get like really focused. I
asked you a question and you didn’t even react.”

Louis felt his neck get hot. “Not the first time I’ve heard that, if you can believe.”

Mike laughed loudly and then said, “Yeah I can. But thanks again, really. This is great.”

“No problem, don’t worry about it,” Louis said, waving it off. He still remembered how
excessively Mike had thanked him last time and Louis was hoping to nip that in the bud now.

“If you want to get, like, dinner or whatever. Go ahead. I’m gonna work on this, so we could
eat together.”

Louis hesitated.

“Foods not half bad,” Mike added, shoving some more into his mouth.

“Oh, alright,” Louis said, giving in. He scooted out of the booth and wound through the
tables and chairs, dodging backpacks thrown on the floor and athletes gesturing wildly to get
to the food line. There were a lot of options and he worked down the counter slowly, taking a
few things that looked good and then grabbing a glass of apple juice before making his way
back to the table.

Mike had cleaned off one plate and was working on the second by the time he sat back down.

After taking his first bite, Louis said, “You’re right, this is pretty good for cafeteria food.”
Mike nodded, clicking on the keyboard with one hand and holding his fork still with the
other. “This place is insane. You’ve been here once before, right?”

He froze for a moment, unsure how to answer, before deciding to go with the vague truth. “A
couple times actually. Not too hard to sneak in, as it turns out. The women’s volleyball team
and I are like this.” Crossing his fingers, he let out a dry laugh.

Mike laughed along with him. “The pool is pretty sick, I’d charm a volleyball team to see it,
too.”

“Haven’t been back in ages though,” Louis added. “My classes are intense.”

“Yeah, I bet.” Mike took another bite and when he swallowed he said, “You’ve not been
around much lately.”

“Oh,” slipped out, before he could stop it. Shifting on the bench seat, he wished he hadn’t
stayed for dinner after all. “Yeah, well Harry and I aren’t really… seeing each other
anymore.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.” Mike scraped the last of his plate and, while he was still chewing,
said, “He can be kind of stubborn.”

Louis laughed a little hollowly. “Yeah, so can I.”

Mike’s brow furrowed and then he looked past Louis’ shoulder and said, “But uh, maybe you
should like close your eyes or something.”

“What? Why?”

“Because he’s right over there.” Mike nodded his head behind Louis and he twisted to see
Harry and a couple other guys from the swim team at the end of the buffet.

Maybe the sight of Harry should have sent him into a panic or caused his stomach to sour.
Maybe he should have tried to leave or duck back into the booth. But instead, seeing Harry
felt as it always did. The same rush of attraction, never changing from that very first day, in
nearly the exact same spot.

He’s pretty sure a surprised, “Oh” fell from his lips and he felt his heat cheeks up. Worse,
maybe when Harry looked up and saw him.

Harry froze with his hand halfway to the drink machine, his eyes snagged on Louis, his
mouth slightly parted and Louis sent him the barest, briefest smile. Harry’s eyes flitted from
him to over his shoulder, to Mike he presumed.

It only lasted a few seconds, but it was the first time in nearly a month that he’d had Harry’s
gaze on him and it was just as intimate as he remembered. Louis turned back into the booth,
his heartbeat pounding loudly in his ears. Swirling his fork through the rice on his plate, he
willed Harry to come over.

He felt Mike’s eyes on him, but he stayed looking down at his food.
Then, like the ties between them loosening, the magnetic field tightening, he felt as Harry
stepped up next to their table. Louis looked up to see Harry looking at Mike, with his
shoulders pulled up like he was uncomfortable. The other two guys he’d been with melted
into the background.

“Hey,” Harry said, awkwardly.

“Hey man,” Mike said, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. “Louis was just helping
me with my essay. Why don’t you join us?”

Louis flicked his eyes to Mike who had an easy smile on his face. Like he couldn’t feel the
tension swirling around the three of them. Harry shifted on his feet, unsure.

With his voice laden with hesitation, Harry said, “Alright.”

Relief washed over Louis. Maybe it would be awkward, but all Louis had really needed was
to be back in the same space as him. To breathe the same air. It felt like the universe was
snapping back in place.

“Oh cool.” Mike closed his laptop and instead of scooting over to let Harry into the booth he
stood up. “Why don’t you go on the inside?”

Giving him an odd look, Harry slid into the booth. Mike put his laptop back in his bag, still
on his feet and said, “I’ve got a thing in like ten, so I actually have to head out. Thanks again,
Louis! Bye, H!”

And then he was gone. Louis watched him make his way through the table, low fiving the
teammates Harry had arrived with as he went, and disappear towards the exit.

Louis turned back to Harry who was still looking after Mike with a shocked look on his face.
“He thinks he’s real slick, huh?”

“Yeah.” Harry let out a short, aborted laugh. “Sorry about all of… this.”

He wanted to reach out and touch Harry’s hand, nudge his foot, but instead, he just said, “I
don’t mind.”

Nodding, Harry looked down to his food, finally picking up his fork to start eating. The plate
in front of him had probably gone cold by now and he’d lost his appetite for it, but he still
held the fork for something to do with his hands.

Harry’s shoulders were a sharp line under his worn t-shirt, like he couldn’t relax.

“How have you been?” Louis finally asked, desperate to fill the silence, but also to hear
Harry’s slow rumbling speech again.

“Um, pretty good. You know - just swimming and school.” He shrugged again. “You?”

“Yeah, the same.” Louis fidgeted with his fork and his face burned with a blush. “I mean, not
swimming, obviously. But I’m busy with school work.”
Harry nodded, still looking down at his food as he spoke. “Did you have a nice spring
break?”

“Just hung out with Liam. He’d never seen Legally Blonde, so we watched that.”

“I always figured that was a requirement of applying to Law school.”

“You’d think,” Louis said, smiling at him. The ease of their conversations rushing back in.
“After that we watched the second one and a bootleg version of the musical and then we got
a little drunk and started to watch the reality show casting of the musical.”

Harry laughed, shaking his head, the smile lingering on his face. Louis had missed the sight
of his dimples.

“What about you? Mike said practices have been intense.”

“Yeah, well you know, end of the season and all that.” Harry swallowed more food down and
Louis waited to see if he would say more.

When he didn’t, when the awkwardness settled over them again, Louis said like a question,
although he already knew the answer, “SECs went well?”

“Yeah, really well.” Harry looked up at him, a small smile on his face.

It sent a pang through him, like a pulse of longing racing through his body.

“I called you. Before.” He swallowed hard around the words, emotion thick in his throat. His
fork pushed at the rice on his plate, a few pieces slipping off the edge and onto the table.

“Yeah,” Harry croaked. “I listened.”

“You didn’t-” Louis cleared his throat and didn’t finish his sentence, the call back left
hanging between them.

“I-” Harry started and then sat up a little higher in the booth, that tension in his shoulders
drooping out by a fraction, and ran a hand through his hair. The smell of his shampoo and the
lingering smell of chlorine floated across the table and stung at Louis’ heart. “I know. I
should have.”

Louis swallowed again It was the first admission either of them had made in the
conversation. Had ever, genuinely, made. It was just so clear to him that Harry was
something he didn’t want to lose. And if that were true, then he needed to make one of his
own.

“Can we talk? Like openly, honestly?”

Under the table he knotted his fingers together while he waited for Harry to jerk his head in a
nod. “I’d really like that.”

Relief flooded through him, loosened every muscle in his body.

“Maybe when you’re done eating we can do that… just not here?” Louis looked around the
dining hall and saw Harry’s teammates look away sharply. Like they’d been watching them to
see what was going on. “So that it’s, like, more private.”

“Yeah, no, that would be better.”

“Okay, good.” Louis blew out a breath. “Because I think the guys you came with have been
watching us?”

Harry looked over his shoulder and Louis peaked as well to see them all duck around again.
Harry cursed under his breath and ran a hand through his hair again, a sheepish grin on his
face.

“I, um, well, I kinda of came out to a few of them. I guess.” His hand was still in his hair,
tugging at it a bit. Like he was using it to distract himself from the words he was saying.

“Really?” A tingly sort of feeling took over his whole body. Flew through his chest. “I’m-
I’m so proud of you for that. Was it- Did it go okay?”

Harry jerked his head once. “They were great actually. Have been great. But I think they…
think I was a bit dumb.”

Louis pressed his lips into a small smile and Harry looked him in the eyes for the first time,
properly, all night. It was overwhelming, the green of them after so long. Light like the spring
unfolding outside. Warm like lake water in summer. Flecks of yellow in them like the
sunshine was bursting out from inside of him.

“I guess-” Harry took a deep breath, holding it for a moment before exhaling all at once. “I
guess maybe I was.”

“I was too,” Louis rushed to say, to share the blame.

Harry dropped his fork and pushed his plate away. “I think I’m done. Let’s go.”

Louis’ heart rate picked up again, but he grabbed his bag and scooted out of the booth.
Grabbing all of the plates on the table, Harry rushed them to the return before coming back to
meet Louis.

“Do you want to go out front?” Harry asked and Louis nodded, following him through the
dining hall. When they passed his friends, Harry swatted one of them playfully on the back of
the head to the amusement of the rest of them, whose laughter followed them out of the
building. Louis could hardly care, didn’t even feel a little bit bothered by it, because they
were finally alone.

They started to walk along the sidewalk and silence settled back over them. Louis knew he
just had to speak, to say it, get it out. But the words felt like sand on his tongue. His hands
were shaking a bit so he tucked them into his pockets and then clenched them together to get
his nerves under control.
It was just Harry. But he also wasn’t just Harry. He was a dream stepped forward. He was
five months of slowly falling for someone who fit perfectly with Louis.

He’d messed it up and Louis had never, ever been good at fixing things. He was the kid that
threw away a toy when the arm broke off, never used a board game again if a piece was
missing, moved on if something went wrong. Because there was always something else,
something better, waiting just around the corner.

But not this time.

“You were right,” he said finally. It wasn’t exactly the apology he’d meant to say, but it
would do.

“I know it kills you to admit that,” Harry retorted, the joke catching a bit flat, but Louis
laughed anyway. It broke the tension in him and made it easier to say the next part.

“I do push - people, things, life. And I’m, like, a raging perfectionist.” Harry let out a huff of
laughter and Louis rolled his eyes. “I think it comes from the way I grew up, like, if I didn’t,
who would? But, I didn’t mean to push you. I especially didn’t mean to push you away.”

He looked over to Harry, the sunshine bright behind him, curving around his edges. It was too
much sometimes, the way he cast a light on the whole world.

“You were right too,” Harry said, turning down a small path. Louis was hardly paying
attention where they were going, too focused on their conversation. “I’ve been standing still
for so long, just, like, trying to make the unsavory parts of myself disappear. Those bits that
people don’t want to see and I went too far.”

Louis’ chest was moving rapidly, the words tumbling out of his mouth with force. “I want to
see it.”

They stopped at the edge of a car park, standing close enough together that only a sliver of
sunlight shone between them.

“I know.” Harry skimmed a finger down the outside of Louis’ arm, goosebumps rising at the
barest touch. “I want that too.”

It was beautiful, the feeling that bloomed in his chest. Relief, happiness, peace - all at once.
With the sun and the birds a chorus around them the space between them was singing. He
wanted to wrap his arms around him, pull him in for a kiss, surgically stitch them together.
But instead, he sank his teeth into his lip in a sly grin.

“So, does that mean I was right about us too?”

Harry laughed, vibrant, nearly blindingly up at the sky, before he said, “You already know
you were.”

Louis felt as light as air when he said, nearly bouncing on his heels, “Still feels nice to hear.”
Harry smiled at him, a bit bashfully, maybe, and Louis was so close to stepping forward,
closing that last bit of space between them, to kiss him. Despite them being outside and out in
the open. He could feel it thrumming between them, the desire that was always there, the
attraction pulling at the strings of them.

“Do you want to go somewhere?”

Louis was nodding before Harry even finished speaking. A slow, sweet smile spread on
Harry’s face.

“Let me just get my keys.” He jerked his head towards the building and Louis realized they
were standing in the car park of his flat. Louis nodded again and followed Harry across the
lot. Halfway up the stairs, Harry tangled their fingers together. His palm was a warm weight
against Louis’ and Louis squeezed it three times in a row like he was saying everything with
just a touch.

In front of the door was the same You Are Home doormat. Harry stepped right over it and
inside once he unlocked the door, but the words rushed through Louis like a beautiful truth.

“I’ll be right back.”

“Okay,” Louis said, moving into the living room where Johannes was playing a video game,
hunched forward staring at the TV intently.

Without looking away from the screen he called, “Hello, Louis. Nice to see you again.”

“You too, mate.” Their place hadn’t changed really at all since the last time Louis had been
by. It was still fairly neat for a college guys dorm and, even though it was full of ugly
furniture, it felt cozy.

The game on screen paused and Johannes peeked down the hall where Harry disappeared
before turning to Louis.

“No, really, I think we’re all glad to see you back.”

“Really?”

“H was a sad, sorry sack without you,” he said and then laughed loudly. Harry walked out of
his room while Johannes was still laughing and he slapped a hand over his mouth to stifle it.
The video game unpaused, but he still tossed Louis a wink and a short eyebrow wiggle before
turning away.

Louis couldn’t help but look at him with amusement, the fizzy joyful feeling from his words
continuing to sparkle under his skin.

“You ready?” Harry asked, a backpack over his shoulder and his car keys in his hand.

“Yeah, of course.” Louis stepped back to pull open the door. Over his shoulder he called,
“See you next time, Johannes.”
Johannes’ laughter followed them out of the room and Harry cast him a bemused look, but
didn’t ask.

When they got to his car, Louis climbed into the passenger seat. It felt so familiar to be back
there, like it was his seat. He’d spent half the year catching rides with Harry and feeling the
warmth of his hand on Louis’ thigh as he drove him to and from school.

“Where are we going?” he asked as Harry pulled the car into drive.

“The beach.” Harry turned onto the main road. “Maybe it’s a cliche, but the ocean always
makes me feel…”

“Free,” Louis finished.

“Yeah, exactly.” Looking over at Louis with a smile, he added, “Kind of how this feels. Like
we need to be there and be together.”

There was a calm between them. So much still needed to be said, things they had to talk
about, but it was like the wave had crashed and now it was just a cool caress of it over them.
The silent, weightless feeling of being exactly where he was meant to be.

They drove east towards the coast, the sun setting in the rear window behind them. The car
was bathed in pinks and oranges and deep purples as it sank lower in the sky. Harry’s hand
slipped off the gear shift and down to his thigh, warm through the material of his shorts.
Louis smiled out the passenger side window, the landscape blurring by as the car sped across
State Road 20.

They pulled into the empty public car park next to the beach an hour later when the sky was
just an inky purple over the ocean. Very faintly he could hear the waves. Even with the
windows closed. Even from the parking lot. It filled him up like a well.

“Do you want to go out there?” Harry asked.

“Yeah, of course. It’s why we drove all this way, right?”

He looked over to Harry, who was already turned to him with a small smile on his face. It had
only been a couple of hours since Harry sat down at the table with him, until they’d fumbled
their way through apologies and explanations. Through saying the things they were both bad
at expressing. But he could feel the way everything between them was healing.

Louis leaned over the center console and pressed a slow, sweet kiss to Harry’s lips. Harry’s
hand came up to grip his arm and then slipped to hold his back. Goddamn he’d missed
Harry’s hands on his body.

When Louis pulled back, the hand remained, and he felt a little lightheaded and too pleased
with himself.

“Missed that,” he whispered, opening his eyes. Harry’s were still closed, like he was soaking
in the space between them. Louis kissed his cheek, right next to his nose and then left another
closer to his ear. He’d kiss every inch of him if he had the time and space. “Let’s go.”
Harry nodded, letting out a breath that ghosted over Louis’ lips before he opened his eyes. So
stunning, so familiar, the brightest thing in the world, Louis thought. Before opening the car
door, he kissed him once more for good measure.

The air was chillier on the coast and the breeze ruffled his hair the minute he climbed out of
Harry’s car. Stepping up onto the curb, Louis breathed in the sea air, salty and sharp. It settled
deeply inside of him like a fond memory.

The car door slammed behind him and then Harry stepped up next to him. He had a couple
beach towels under his arm and his backpack over his shoulder. They walked down the
wooden stairs towards the beach one after another, pulling off their trainers on the last step
and sinking into the cool sand. Shivers ran up his spine.

When he’d come to the beach with Harry in November, they’d been chasing the sunrise and
now they were watching the last dregs of light slip from the sky. It felt like they’d come full
circle.

The tide was going out, so Harry put the towels down just above the surf and then they both
settled down on them. It was quiet between them for a moment, the stillness a comfort with
just the rolling waves as white noise in the background.

“Johannes called you a sad, sorry sack without me,” Louis joked, but it was really a thinly
veiled question. He didn’t say, but he meant, was that true?

Harry let out a puff of laughter and then moved so his legs were stretched out in front of him
and leaning back on his arms.

“Maybe, yeah. I think I was just trying to sort myself out, but he kept telling me I looked like
a sad frog.”

Louis burst out in a laugh, the sound of it echoing out over the ocean, his mouth pulled
impossibly wide in a smile. Harry nudged him with his elbow, but he was rolling his eyes
fondly. When Louis calmed a bit, Harry’s smile dipped and he looked back out to the sea.

Like it made him brave enough to say what he needed to.

“I guess it was probably true. I had been kind of trying to ignore how things were between
us.”

“How do you mean?” Louis asked even though he had a guess. Long nights where they slept
and studied with each other, but never fucked. Harry’s mum’s number in his phone, the casual
ways they touched and kissed.

“It was all getting a bit messy, a bit muddled. I knew we had to talk, but I didn’t want to.”

“I didn’t either,” Louis whispered out to the ocean.

In his peripheral vision, he saw Harry nod his head.

“It was like we just kept sleeping on all our problems, like somehow we’d solve them in our
dreams. But of course we didn’t, of course we couldn’t. When Liam called me your
boyfriend, I don’t know, I just… panicked. Even though I knew that’s, like, what we’d
become. I guess I was just afraid? I don’t know if that’s even it.”

Harry let out a long, drawn out sigh. Louis inched his hand across the towel and linked his
pinky with Harry’s.

“And then we went and made it all messier,” Louis added in, his tone light despite how gray
the words felt on his tongue.

“Yeah,” Harry laughed a bit hollowly. “I, um, talked about it all with my mom a bit. She said
it kind of reminded her of how I handled my dad? A little bit anyway. Like I’ve been holding
onto all this heartache for years and never figured out what to do with it. I always just shut
down instead and I’ve found it really hard to let people in. She mentioned Robin, which I
know is true. I kind of kept him at arm’s length, but she was telling me how much I mean to
him and how he’s always thought of me as his son.”

Harry took a deep, ragged breath and Louis slipped their hands together on the towel,
squeezing it.

“It made me realize how much I’d been holding myself back from, like, all of the things that I
want. That I have this horrible fear that things will be taken away from me if it’s too good or
if I want it too much. So in my head I just think, like, better not do it at all then. You can’t
lose if you don’t try and I hate losing.”

Louis snorted and said, “Yeah I get that. So do I. It’s probably because we are both so
stubborn.”

“Yeah,” Harry breathed out. “We really are.”

“For good and bad, I think. We are both such overachievers in general and just, like,
ruthlessly refuse to give up.” He squeezed Harry’s hand again, let the heat of their palms
warm the rest of him. “I know I was harsh, that I can be harsh. You have to know it’s because
of how much I admire you, especially the parts of you that aren’t shared with other people. I
know I didn’t express that in the right way.”

The wind whipped through the space between them causing the hair on his arms to stand on
end. He shuffled closer to Harry and pressed them together from shoulder to hip, their hands
tangled on his lap.

“I kind of jumped on you when you woke up, to be fair,” Harry said. “You were mostly
asleep and hungover, if I’d timed it better then maybe it wouldn’t have been so awful - for the
both of us.”

“Maybe it was good, what we needed or something. You talked to your mum and your
teammates. You were really brave for that, H. I talked to my mum too, properly for the first
time in ages. I don’t think I would have done that if you hadn’t said what you did.”
“How was that?”

“Good, I think. It felt normal, like the way I always wished things had been between us.
Maybe someday we can have the conversations I’ve always wanted to have with her, but for
now, calling her first every once in a while might be enough.” Louis looked out over the sea.
It was fully dark now, except for the light pollution in a hazy, muddled black over the water.
Not quite clear enough to see the stars, but it was enough to know they were up there.
“Talked to Niall and Oli too. They gave me a bit of the reality check I needed.”

Harry laughed, bumping their shoulders together. “They seem like they’d be good for that.”

“Promised them I’d stop trying to orchestrate my own life.”

“Gonna be tough for you,” Harry teased.

Louis’ draw dropped a bit in mock surprise. “I have no clue what you’re referring to.”

“Come on,” Harry needled him. “I’m not dumb, you know.”

He rolled his eyes. “I know you aren’t.”

“Okay, good,” Harry blew out a laugh. “I knew what you were doing all along. I was just
kind of ignoring it. I saw you drop your keys in my car, that first night.”

Louis laughed, a bright, happy thing at the sky. He’d thought he’d been so sneaky, so slick.

“You didn’t say anything.”

“I sort of wanted to see what your plan was.” Harry squeezed his hand and then stood up,
tugging Louis with him. “You didn’t disappoint.”

Louis laughed, delighted, and then leaned forward with his other hand to Harry’s chest and
kissed him. It was mostly teeth, both smiling wide, barely trying to make it something sweet,
too lost in the joy of it all.

Stepping backwards, their mouths parting, Harry tugged Louis with him by his wrists
towards the water. The sand was cool under his feet and still faintly damp from where the tide
was still retreating back. He kept his eyes on Harry’s face as they walked and realized he
didn’t mind letting him lead. That maybe he’d follow him anywhere.

When he walked into the surf, Harry hissed and a moment later Louis did the same. The
ocean was cold and stinging on his bare feet. It was still only mid-March and despite it being
Florida, it was still winter. The sea water was foamy around his toes and Harry pulled him a
few more steps in until his ankles were covered.

“Fucking cold, mate,” Louis said, but he was laughing, holding tight to Harry’s hands.

Harry tugged him closer and then, still with their fingers tangled, wrapped an arm behind his
back. Twisting and turning them until they were sealed together. Harry pressed a kiss to his
cheek and then kept his face held there, his mouth to Louis’ temple.
Quietly, he said, “I’ve missed you calling me baby.”

Louis looked over his shoulder, the ocean a dark nothingness behind them.

“You told me not to.”

“I take it back. I want to be your baby. Your sunshine.”

Louis let out a ragged breath and let go of Harry’s hand, instead wrapping his own tightly
around Harry’s shoulders in a hug.

“I want that too.”

Harry tucked his face in Louis’ neck and they held each other in a tight embrace. The surf
was still rising and falling over their feet, cold, but they were getting used to it. The wind was
light around them, ruffling their clothes, but they didn’t mind. Being with Harry had always
felt like his world was centering to just him, but now it felt like the whole universe was
ceasing to exist outside of that moment.

He breathed in the scent of him - the chlorine, the herbal soap, and the salt of the ocean in the
air clinging to his skin.

“You called me a distraction. I don’t want to be that.”

Twisting his fingers in Harry’s t-shirt where it stretched across his shoulder blades, he felt
Harry’s palms press firmly to his lower back.

“I think it’s only ever in a good way. In a way I need. So I can step outside of my own head
and be with you in the moment.” Harry pulled back slightly to look at him. “I’d be lying if I
said you made anything in my life more difficult.”

He kissed Louis on the forehead and then once on the lips.

“Well, good,” Louis said after a moment. “Because I wasn’t about to apologize for being into
you.”

“I’m glad,” Harry laughed into the space between them. “I wouldn’t want you to.”

Louis leaned forward to kiss him again and then smiled into it, too overjoyed to kiss him
properly. There was a lightness inside of him, that was being anchored in Harry’s arms and
then cradled in the sea. Such loveliness he couldn’t quite put it into words.

Harry’s hands were a warm weight on his back, the only warmth really between the water and
the wind. He leaned back into them and felt like he had in the water back in November, that
weightless feeling he hardly ever had. He felt free.

“To think we got here because Jessica’s boyfriend slept with her cousin.”

“And because you pretended to be on the golf team.”

“Also the track team,” Louis corrected.

“Right, right. Didn’t you say you could beat me in a race?”

Righting himself in Harry’s arm, the challenge of it was already coursing through him.
“Yeah, I did say that. I’m the quickest man in the world.”

Harry tossed his head back in laughter. It was loud, spreading out over the vacant beach and
Louis wanted to bottle it. Carry it with him always.

“Sure, Lou,” Harry said, rolling his eyes, his cheeks still dimpling in laughter.

“Alright, let’s race now then.” Looking down the beach, he spotted a marker. “To the
lifeguard station. You’ll see, sunshine.”

Harry laughed again, but Louis was stepping out of his arms, out of the water onto the sand,
and bouncing on his toes to warm up his calves. Harry shook his head, but moved to stand
next to him on the shore. Harry might have been an athlete and pure muscle. He might have
been the fittest bloke he’d ever seen, but Louis was fast.

After Harry counted them down, they were sprinting across the sand. Harry was ahead for
three strides before they were even for half the race until Louis pulled out and ahead. His legs
were burning in the soft ground, but it was thrilling to be whipping through the cool ocean
air.

He was laughing as he ran past the lifeguard station, slowing down and bending over to try to
breathe through it. Harry barreled into him and took him to the ground, causing Louis to let
out a loud screech as they fell onto the sand. Harry’s hands were wrapped around his waist,
his knee digging into Louis’ side and his face pressed nearly to Louis’ own. They were both
laughing, bellies shaking with it, while they panted on the sand.

“I told you, I’m king on a fifty meter road,” Louis boasted, smiling up at the sky. Harry
giggled into his neck and then left a wet kiss on his cheek.

“I want a rematch.”

“No way, I won fair and square. Don’t be a sore loser, baby.”

Harry let out an appalled squawk and then laughed as he dug his fingers in Louis’ side in a
poor imitation of a tickle that had him giggling and squirming into the night.

They stayed at the beach for a couple more hours until they rinsed their sandy feet off and
climbed back into Harry’s car. He had practice in the morning he couldn’t skip and it was
already nearing midnight with an hour and a half drive back to Gainesville.

On the way, the wind whipped through the open windows, carrying the low music out and
around with it, stinging their ears, and chilling their fingertips. Harry’s hand stayed on his
thigh the whole way there.
When they got back to school, Louis followed him up the stairs and into his flat. It was dark
and silent inside when they tiptoed to his room. Stripping out of their sandy clothes, they left
them in a pile on the bathroom floor before rinsing their bodies off in the shower. Louis
rubbed those fancy herbal soaps Harry loved into his body, kissing over his chest and
collarbones as he went.

With his hands curled around Louis’ biceps, Harry whispered, “Careful, I don’t put out on the
first date.”

Louis snorted, biting gently at the curve of his shoulder.

“Sun, we’ve been on a million and one dates already.”

“They don’t count,” Harry protested. “I didn’t know they were dates.”

Louis pulled back and looked up at his eyes, squinting at him. The warm water had plastered
his hair to his head and he had a fat drop of water dripping down his temple to his chin.

“Sunshine, baby, I took you out on your birthday. I cooked dinner for you on Valentine’s day.
If you didn’t know those were dates, that’s on you.”

Harry closed his eyes when he laughed, the tops of his cheeks going pink in a blush, but he
didn’t try to defend himself. Just let Louis pull him off in the shower, with the steam and the
smell of his soap heavy in the air, their lips bruising between them.

After, they climbed into bed naked, slipping along the cool sheets to press against each other
in the center of the bed. It felt more right than things had in a long time. More right than they
had before their argument. It was out in the open now, they were out in the open now.

It was more than Louis could have hoped for - the joy, the playfulness, the companionship
that Harry brought to his life.

He looked across the bed at him, the peacefulness of his face, his hair still wet and flopping
on the white linen.

“I can really see us working, can’t you?”

Harry brushed a hand along his hip and then settled into the dip of his waist. So brightly
warm under the cool sheets.

“Yeah, Lou. I can see it.”

 Epilogue - Summer
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes

“Where the fuck did I put my keys?” Louis asked himself, digging in his backpack while he
stood in the hallway outside Niall’s flat. It was a miserable early June day in Boston, so his
raincoat was dripping fat droplets of water into the open pocket, soaking his notes and
slipping off his laptop case.

At the very bottom of his bag, half wedged under his laptop and the glass container he’d
brought his lunch in, were his keys. Or key, really. Just the one for Niall’s door. He’d
managed to duck into the building behind Niall’s neighbor, joking about the weather and he
was thankful he hadn’t had to do this outside.

Louis was just twisting the key in the lock when his phone started to ring in his back pocket.

“Shit,” he muttered to himself, pushing the door open with hip and twisting to grab his
phone, while trying to keep his still opened bag from spilling everywhere. He was mostly
successful, only losing a pen and a little bit of his dignity before getting the door shut behind
him.

Swiping haphazardly to answer the FaceTime call, Harry’s face loaded onto the screen just as
he tugged off his jacket and toed off his shoes.

“Hi Lou!” Harry said cheerfully from his dorm kitchen, the screen low enough he could see
Harry from his smiling face down to the apron he had over his neck.

“Baby, hi,” Louis exhaled as he tried to get his shoes and his jacket neat enough not to hear
Niall’s annoyed sigh when he got home. “Sorry, I just got in. Was running a bit late with the
weather.”

“It’s okay, I was just getting everything set up. I’m still nervous about this whole cooking
thing even though we’ve done it before.”

Louis double checked his shoes and that his jacket hook was facing the same way as Niall’s
before shuffling in his socks to the kitchen. His first week in Boston, he and Harry had
inadvertently made dinner at the same time on a call and decided to do it on purpose, at least
once weekly, while they were apart for the summer. Harry had wanted to learn to cook
anyway and it was a nice way to spend time with each other.

It was cute how serious he took it. Louis had been trying to sprinkle in a bit of French as they
went as well, but he didn’t want it to start feeling too much like a classroom.

“You don’t have anything to be nervous about, sun. Mike texted me four times to tell me how
excited he was for dinner tonight.”
Harry looked bashful on the screen, fidgeting with his apron and then the ends of his hair
where they were long enough to curl around his ears. Louis missed the feel of it between his
fingers, the smell staining his skin for hours afterwards. It’d been just under a month since
finals had ended and he’d flown to Boston. He missed Harry something fierce, but at least
he’d be seeing him again in just over a week for Olympic Trials.

“He keeps calling it family dinner,” Harry joked.

Louis smiled at the camera, warmth rolling through him. The last two months of school had
been the best. The ways he and Harry had settled into each other, how their lives had
seamlessly worked themselves together. Harry’s roommates were his friends now and it
wasn’t weird like it could have been. Not like Harry worried it would be.

“I guess it kind of is.” Louis pulled off his suit jacket, moving through the flat to put it in the
second bedroom. It was Niall’s home office which was so small all that fit next to Niall’s
desk was a lumpy futon; Louis’ bed until mid-August. It was free so he could hardly
complain.

Louis pulled off his tie and loosened the collar of his dress shirt. Harry’s face was taking up
most of the screen, as if he’d pulled it close for a better look.

“You have something to say, baby?” Louis teased, propping the phone on Niall’s desk so he
could roll up his sleeves.

“Yeah,” Harry teased, running his bottom lip between his teeth. “But the guys are here, so,
I’ll hold back.”

Humming, Louis smirked at him, before picking his phone back up and moving to the
kitchen. Niall’s space really was immaculate and it had been a challenge for Louis, he
couldn’t lie, to try to keep it that way. Niall had even sat him down on the first night to give
him a lecture about cleanliness and order. There had been a PowerPoint and everything.

Louis opened the fridge and said, “Okay, what were we making again?”

“Shrimp tacos. I bought three times as much as you recommended because when I let the
guys know, suddenly everyone was free for dinner.”

Louis snorted and took the ingredients out of the fridge, pushing them onto Niall’s counter.
“Funny how that works, isn’t it?”

With a teasing note to his voice, Harry asked, “What’s first, chef?”

His laughter echoed across the speakers from Harry back to himself and filled the space
between them. They chatted about their days while he led Harry through deveining the
shrimp - how Louis was getting on with the other summer associates now that they had all
started (about as well as he expected) and how Harry’s training had picked up with Olympic
Trials right around the corner.
Setting the finished shrimp aside, Louis went to wash his hands, and then turned to the
camera balanced against Niall’s coffee canister. Harry was just popping a cherry tomato into
his mouth.

“Oi! Those are for the salad,” Louis scolded him, halfheartedly, but Harry was smiling back
at him with a bit of juice on his lip.

“It was just one,” Harry protested and continued to not look the least bit guilty. Louis shook
his head, but he knew the effect was lost by how much he was smiling back at him.

“Let’s make the sauce,” Louis said, prompting Harry to nod.

Out of a cabinet next to the sink, Harry dug out the food processor with a look of triumph
Louis had only ever seen in the pool. Louis led him through making the cilantro lime sauce
and when it was done, they both tasted a bit off the end of a spoon. Mutually agreeing that
yes, it was salty enough and no, cilantro didn’t taste like soap to either of them, they added it
to the cabbage to finish off the slaw.

“Quinoa next,” Louis said, grabbing the package from his dwindling stack of ingredients.
“Not my fave, personally, but good for you, yeah?”

Harry was nodding. “You get used to it.”

While the quinoa was cooking on the hob, Louis relayed the conversation he’d had with his
mum on his lunch break that afternoon.

“She finally decided to book flights for the end of September,” Louis said, smiling at Harry
while he stirred.

“Oh, that’s so great.” Harry’s dimples were deep set in his cheeks and Louis wished he was
there to press his thumb into the left one, his favorite. To kiss over it, press his nose to
Harry’s temple and breathe him in. “Are they staying down in Orlando?”

“Yes, I think it was Dan’s idea actually to book into one of the hotels at Disney. My mum
kept arguing about the cost and he was saying ‘but it’s a once in a lifetime trip!’ which makes
me think he’s more excited for it than he had been letting on.”

On screen, Harry was giggling and Louis watched him fondly. After their argument in
February, after he talked to his mum for the first time, and after he and Harry worked their
shit out, he had tried to be better at keeping in touch with her. Before, he always brushed
anyone off when they mentioned her, but now he let Harry encourage him and listened to
him.

They both were working on being better listeners, being less stubborn, trusting each other
more. It wasn’t as difficult as he thought it would be. Not when he wanted to do those things
for Harry.

“I think I’m going to go down there for the whole week,” Louis added on.
“Louis Tomlinson skipping classes?” Dropping his jaw in mock outrage, Harry pressed a
hand to his chest. “As I live and breathe? I never thought I’d see the day.”

Rolling his eyes, he huffed out a laugh. “I’ve already started texting Liam about class notes
and recording lectures. You can imagine how that’s gone over.”

Harry laughed loudly, tossing his head back. Around his giggles he said, “Lou, it’s over three
months away.”

“Whatever,” Louis scoffed. His quinoa seemed just about done. “How’s it looking? I think
I’m there.”

Still smiling, Harry leaned forward to look in the pot. The curls around his face sprung up
from the steam. “I think it looks right?”

The video shook a little as Harry picked his phone up and then the view changed to show the
pot. “Looks good, baby. Pull it off the burner to cool and we can start on the tomatoes.”

Harry flipped the camera around again and set Louis back down so he could take the quinoa
off the hob. While Louis walked him through marinating the tomatoes for the salad, he
peppered in the French words for every item they picked up. Harry repeated them back at him
slowly, his pronunciations curling with a lick of a southern accent at the end. Enough to have
Louis smiling helplessly at him.

The dull sound of Harry’s knife on the cutting board echoed over the line as he sliced some of
the larger pieces in half. “Well, y’all will have the best time. It’ll be great to see them.”

Louis chewed on his lip and watched him for a moment, the curls over his ears bouncing with
every movement of his shoulder as he worked the knife, the gentle slope of his lips as the
happiness settled onto his face.

“Come with us,” Louis said. He wanted Harry to meet his mum, his sisters, so badly. He
wanted so much with Harry and in all the ways it was easier with him now, that was just as
hard. The feelings he had for him, some of which he’d yet to say, burned under his skin.

The urge to look away from the screen after he asked was strong, to blurt it out and then not
let Harry read the adoration on his face, the hope, but he stayed watching him. Harry’s eyes
flicked up and his smile grew wider, his nose scrunching with the force of it.

“Alright, yeah, of course, Lou. I’d love to meet your family.”

Those words had a blush heating his ears. “Well, good. I know your schedule isn’t out for
autumn yet…”

Harry waved him off. “I’ll fit it in. Even if I can’t be there the whole time.”

As he pushed the halved tomatoes off the cutting board and into the bowl, Louis could barely
contain the fondness he felt for him. He didn’t need to look at the small image of himself in
the corner to know that his lips were pursed around it, like his face could barely hold back the
open affection he wanted to smother Harry in.
He must have been quiet too long, just watching Harry, because he looked up after wiping his
hands on a kitchen towel, his mouth quirked, and asked, “What’s next?”

Louis looked at him for a moment longer, just taking him in, long enough Harry’s cheeks
pinked a bit, before he shook his head and got on with the rest of the marinade.

They powered through the rest of the salad and seasoning the shrimp, getting it in the frying
pan before they were interrupted. Louis had heard Harry’s roommates occasionally in the
background, but the noise that jostled him this time was coming from inside Niall’s flat.

Leaning back from the hob with his hand still on the handle of the frying pan, he strained to
peek into the entrance hall, but it was just out of sight. The smell of the spice wafting off the
shrimp was strong and the whole kitchen smelled amazing. Knowing Niall he’d be floating in
there nose first in half a second at most.

“Mike is salivating on the couch, I think,” Harry joked, looking over the top of the screen
towards his roommate.

Through the phone he heard Mike call, “It smells so good!”

They laughed and then, just as he was taking the shrimp off the heat, Niall yelled, “Holy fuck
Lou!” behind him.

He snorted, feeling his neck go warm from the compliment. Looking over his shoulder, he
saw Niall and Zayn walking into the kitchen, Niall in his work clothes still and Zayn in jeans
and a loudly patterned button down.

About two days after getting to Boston he’d met Zayn. He and Niall were attached at the hip,
so Louis was almost surprised it had taken that long. Niall had been delighted with how well
they got on and the three of them had done several things together since he’d been up here.
One of which were these family dinners, as Mike called it.

“I’m nearly done,” Louis said, smiling at the pair of them.

“I could make drinks,” Zayn offered, shrugging. “I make a mean mojito.”

Niall let out a whoop, chanting out, “MOJITOOO,” and then started pulling out ingredients
for him.

“Are these done, Lou?” Harry asked. Louis turned back to his phone to see Harry had already
rotated the camera towards the frying pan so Louis could check on his shrimp. They looked
good, nearly perfect actually, and he told Harry so, watching a blush rise on his cheeks.

“Now it’s just plating.” On a nonstick pan over the same burner, he started warming the
tortillas. Harry was doing the same, familiar with this part of the process.

“Can I just grab-” Zayn said, leaning past Louis to reach into the cabinet next to him. He
pulled something out from inside and then tossed Louis a small smile in thanks.

Louis looked down at Harry who had picked up the phone and was squinting at it.
“Is that Zayn?” he yelled. “Oh my God, he really is the hottest man I’ve ever seen.”

Zayn froze next to him and a beat later Niall broke into laughter. So loud, Louis was certain
Harry’s neighbors had to have heard it. On screen he looked a bit sheepish, one hand pressed
to his mouth like he hadn’t meant to say it, and Louis couldn’t help giggling along.

“Thanks, man,” Zayn said, waving at the phone. Harry waved back at him, still covering his
mouth with the other in embarrassment.

He walked back to the other side of the kitchen where he was preparing their drinks and
Harry finally dropped his hand, shaking his head.

“I didn’t mean to say that out loud,” he muttered, looking sheepish.

“Hard to control yourself around him, I get it,” Louis teased and Harry’s face got impossibly
redder.

“I hate you so much,” Harry said with little conviction.

Louis smiled back at him and took the last of the tortillas out of the frying pan. Everything
was plated and ready to go to the table; Harry having everything finished as well.

Niall reached around him to grab the plates and the shrimp, tossing a, “Hiya,” at Harry as he
passed.

Behind Harry he could see his roommates flooding the kitchen, starting to make their tacos.
Mike was already chewing, nodding enthusiastically.

Louis opened his mouth to say something, he wasn’t sure what, something to delay the end of
the call, but Niall cut him off by shouting from the table, “Give Harry a kiss and come to
dinner, Lou!”

He rolled his eyes and Harry huffed out a laugh, ducking his chin as he did so. Louis
stretched his arm out to give Niall the finger, but all he got back from his best friend was
another round of loud laughter.

“Guess it’s dinner time,” Louis said, smiling and digging his teeth into his lip, just for Harry.

Harry grinned. “Guess so.”

“I’ll talk to you tonight?”

“I’ll text you,” Harry said, already turning back towards his roommates and the food behind
him.

“Bye, sunshine,” Louis said, ending the call, the I love you burning unsaid on his tongue.

+
On the 17th of June, Louis wrung his hands together behind his back in the doorway of
Patrick’s office.

“Hey, mate,” Louis said in greeting.

Patrick looked up from his computer screen, his eyes still tired like his morning coffee hadn’t
kicked in yet. Beyond being the associate to interview him for the position, Patrick was also
in charge of the summer associates now that they were on site. Aside from Louis, there were
seven others, mostly 2Ls, so Patrick had a lot on his hands outside of his regular work.

“Oh, good morning, Louis. What’s up?” Patrick took a loud sip of his coffee and then
winced.

“I’m still working on doc review for the Cortes-Bryant case, but I should be done with that
by tomorrow morning at the latest.”

Patrick nodded, but squinted his eyes at Louis like he knew there was something else.

“Also,” Louis tacked on, awkwardly. “I just wanted to make sure it was on your calendar that
I’d requested Friday off. If it’s not still okay, that’s fine, of course.”

Patrick raised an eyebrow and then turned back to his computer and clicked a couple times,
presumably to the Outlook calendar. “Yeah, I see it here. Let me double check what we need
completed this week.”

“Alright.”

“What did you have going on again?” Patrick asked, still looking at his computer.

Louis shuffled on his feet. “A family event out of state.”

“Are you going back to England?” There was a slight alarm in his voice.

Louis laughed, “No, just Indianapolis. I’ll be back on Sunday. But if there’s anything you
need me to do when I’m gone, I can 100% work from my laptop.”

Patrick clicked a few more times and Louis could see his eyes scanning the screen. “We
actually look pretty caught up. I had you blocked out for that doc review through Thursday
anyway, so if you’re finishing that by tomorrow morning we can actually be slightly ahead
for once.”

Relief flooded through him. “Yeah, absolutely. I’m nearly done. I might even be able to finish
today.”

Patrick snorted. “You don’t need to kill yourself for it yet, Louis. Let the 2L’s duke it out in
competition a little bit more, they are the ones vying for an offer at the end of the summer.”
Louis let out an awkward sounding, to his own ears at least, laugh. Trying less hard wasn’t
something he could even really fathom doing, but he could pretend for Patrick’s sake.

The mouse clicked loudly a couple more times and then Patrick cleared his throat.

“Yeah, you’re good for Friday. But bring your laptop just in case, you never know what the
partners are going to hand me at 4pm on Friday.”

“Will do, thank you again,” Louis said, stepping back out of the doorway. Patrick gave him a
wave with his coffee cup in hand and his eyes already back on the computer.

Letting out a shaky breath, Louis walked down the hallway to his cubicle and wiped his
sweaty palms on his trousers.

Friday morning he took the first flight out to Indianapolis, landing just after eleven. Harry
and his family were staying in a hotel near the stadium where Olympic Trials were being held
and Louis was anxious for the entire uber ride there, about ready to jump out of his skin for
how much he’d missed Harry.

FaceTime, phone calls, and texts were all well and good, but they’d always had a very
physical relationship. Not just the sex, but they were very touchy, they liked to be in each
other’s space.

When he’d gotten in the car, Harry had sent him his room number. Originally, he’d wanted to
get Louis from the airport himself, but his schedule didn’t have a lot of room. The very last
thing Louis wanted to do was interrupt his routine.

Rushing out of the car, through the lobby, and into the lifts, he kept his head down and
fiddled with the strap of his duffel bag until it reached Harry’s floor.

Before he knocked on the door to 428 he took a deep breath, suddenly nervous, suddenly
overwhelmed remembering who was on the other side of the door. When he exhaled, he
rapped his knuckles on the very center of the door.

It was only half a minute before it was pulled open and there was Harry on the other side.
Louis didn’t even have time to properly take him in, the blue USA swimming t-shirt, the
curls that were long around his ears, before he was yanked inside.

As the door closed softly behind them, Louis dropped his bag and launched into Harry’s
arms. It was perfect being wrapped up in him again. Like the greatest comfort - the smell of
chlorine on his neck and that same herbal soap. Louis would drown in it if he could.

“Hi sunshine,” Louis said, his lips pressed to Harry’s throat.

“I’ve missed you so much,” Harry said, somehow pulling them closer together. His hands
were flat against Louis’ back, the warmest pressure through his shirt.

“You too,” he whispered, closing his eyes and breathing in.

They stayed like that a minute longer, soaking each other up, finding peace in the balance
between them. Louis’ heart had been beating wildly in the corridor, just before he’d knocked,
but it was steady now, syncing up with Harry’s, which he could feel pulsing against his lips.

Squeezing him tightly once more, Harry pulled back slightly. “My mom wanted me to text
when you got here so we could all get lunch.”

Louis smiled, scraping his lip through his teeth. “She’s missed me.”

“She has,” Harry agreed and then laughed. Anne still texted him semi-regularly, but a lot of it
recently had been about how worried she was about Harry, the fears she didn’t feel like she
could say aloud so she said them over text. What if he didn’t make it? What if he did?

“Let’s make her wait another five minutes,” he decided and tugged Harry in for a kiss.

It was light, familiar. He kept his arms over Harry’s shoulders and one of his hands against
his scalp, tangled in his long hair. Harry’s palms were hot points against his hips and it could
have all gotten heated easily. He was dying to get Harry naked, get his mouth and hands all
over him. But they had time.

All too soon they pulled apart, kissing each other’s cheeks and foreheads, and nosing under
their jaws. Touching each other thoroughly until the very moment they couldn’t anymore.

They went to a long lunch with Harry’s family and then the five of them went to the stadium
to watch the Saturday evening races. Harry had qualifications the next morning for the
1500m final. Louis could see he was nervous, even though he wasn’t saying it. Through
every single race they watched, his knee was jiggling and his fingers were twisting together
in his lap.

He wanted to reach over and soothe him, but he couldn’t.

Instead, he leaned over to whisper, “Let’s go.”

There were a couple semis left, but no finals. Harry surely knew that when he looked at the
pool, looked back to Louis and then, finally, nodded. He leaned over to say something to his
mum, then they were hugging and Harry was standing up.

They walked the short distance back to the hotel with their hands swaying just inches from
each other. Louis missed touching him so much, he wasn’t sure if it was worse being across
the country or within sight of him and still not allowed to reach across the space between
them.
When they were in the lift, Harry said, “I’ve just got to take a quick shower and shave down.”
He rubbed at his arm and Louis could see that some of the hair had started to grow back since
his last race on Tuesday.

As he watched Harry touch his own skin a whole different set of images came to his mind
and before he’d even properly thought about it, Louis asked, “Can I help?”

They were both leaning against the back wall of the lift and Harry looked over to him
sharply, the heat of his gaze palpable in the small space. Now that Louis had said it, spoken it
out into the universe, he couldn’t stop thinking about it - rubbing soap onto Harry’s skin,
revealing it to be silky and smooth underneath, the way he’d feel in Louis’ arms as he took
care of him.

His lips parted at the thought and Harry swallowed hard next to him. Then he nodded just as
the lift opened onto their floor. For a moment, long enough the doors started to close again,
they simply stared at each other before they shook themselves back to reality. Out of the
heady little bubble that encased them under those god awful fluorescent lights, where the
only thing Louis could see was Harry, the only thing he could feel was the thudding of his
own heart and the tension coiling, then snapping between them.

As Harry unlocked the hotel door, Louis stood close, maybe too close, behind him. His hand
brushed over Harry’s hip, feeling the heat of his skin from under his shirt, just as Harry
pushed open the door.

Once the door closed, Harry turned in his arms, taking Louis’s head in his hands, and drew
him in for a bruising kiss. Louis tucked his thumbs into the waistband of Harry’s shorts,
anchored together through the hold they had on each other.

Their lips pushed and twisted before Louis pulled back with a smiling bite, dragging his teeth
along Harry’s lips to feel him shiver. Harry let out a huff that sounded like it was half moan
and half laughter, flexing his fingers on Louis’ jaw in retaliation, the tightening causing a
wave of pleasure to race down his spine.

They kissed for minutes more, until Louis was hard in his jeans and was just about to shove
Harry back towards the bed.

Harry leaned back, pressing one more peck to Louis’ lips. With just an inch between their
mouths he said, “Let me just shave real quick, it’ll be faster.”

Smiling, he kissed the corner of Harry’s mouth, and asked, “Why do you want it to be fast?”

Harry’s breath was hot on his lips on the exhale and then he leaned in to kiss him again,
sliding his hands over Louis’ shoulders, his arms, and then slipped around his waist.

“Okay,” Harry whispered into his mouth.

“Slow,” Louis murmured, running his tongue along Harry’s bottom lip before pulling back.
His eyes blinked open languidly and when he looked at Harry, Louis saw he was still living
in that moment, his hair messy, lips wet and eyes still blissfully closed. “Get undressed for
me, baby.”

Harry nodded, rubbing his hands on Louis’ hips for a moment more before he dropped them.
When he looked back up to Louis, the green in his eyes was striking, that summer shade like
grass glowing in the sunlight, like the haven he’d like to sink down into. Louis had known for
months that he loved Harry, but it was never more clear to him than in that moment. He’d do
whatever it took, whatever necessary, to always have Harry looking at him just like this.

While Harry undressed, Louis went into the small bathroom, thankful to see there was a tub
and not just a shower stall. All of Harry’s bath products lined the edge of it, including his
razor and shaving cream. On the soap dish sat a half finished bar, which Louis recognized as
the soap he’d bought Harry for Christmas with his sisters. Where he’d spent what felt like an
hour sniffing everyone and picturing what Harry would smell like wearing it. Now he didn’t
have to wonder.

Pulling off his clothes, he kicked them against the vanity. The tub was filling up slowly and
he’d just bent to test the temperature when Harry stepped into the room behind him.

“You are a tease, you know that right?”

Louis let out a startled laugh. “Yeah, that was my nickname in school. Tommo the Tease.”

“Was it really?”

“No, of course not.” Louis rolled his eyes and then turned off the tap.

When Louis turned around Harry was shaking his head, but he had a broad smile on his face.
He was fully naked and somehow in the month since he’d seen Harry, his tan had gotten
deeper and the line on his lower abdomen where his speedo cut was sharper than ever.

Louis rubbed his thumb across the skin and watched goosebumps trail after his touch.

“The tub isn’t the most convenient,” Harry said, as if his whole body wasn’t pebbled from
one brush of Louis’ finger, as if his cock wasn’t already chubbing up against his thigh.

“I don’t care,” Louis retorted, shrugging. “Want to be in the bath with you.”

Harry smiled, shaking his head slightly, and then kissed Louis on the cheek, so high his lips
brushed Louis’ eyelashes. He slipped by him and then into the water, leaning back against the
wall.

“Are you going to attend to me? Is that what they call it?”

“Fuck off,” Louis snorted. “Move your legs a bit.”

Harry shuffled in the tub and then Louis stepped in. The water was warm as it rose on his leg
and he steadied himself with a hand on Harry’s shoulder while he sank down to his knees,
straddling Harry’s thighs.
“Oh,” Harry breathed out a bit dumbly, his hands sliding under the surface to curl around
Louis’ knees.

“Oh,” Louis echoed back, his voice a little mocking just to see the blush rise on Harry’s face.
He moved a hand from Harry’s shoulder to sweep across his pecs and then down his arm
under the water to squeeze Harry’s hand. “Want to talk to you while I get your chest. I’ve
missed it.”

His nose scrunching in affection and Harry smiled up at him. “Me too. FaceTime is nice and
all, but it’s not the same.”

“No, it’s nothing like this.” Louis adjusted on his lap, felt Harry’s hard cock slip against his
inner thigh and smirked down at him.

“What if,” Harry started, running his hands up Louis’ thighs and around to hold his arse.
“When all this is over, I come to Boston?”

“When all this is over? Sun, you’re heading to Paris.”

“Okay, but if I don’t.”

Louis shook his head. “But you are.”

“It’s not official until it’s official,” Harry said, worrying his bottom lip between his teeth. “I
can’t believe it’s true until it is.”

Louis carded his fingers through the ends of Harry’s hair that were wet from the bathwater
and looked at him. The nerves he’d had while they were watching the meet was back. Louis
hated to see the doubt on his face.

Olympic Trials had started the Saturday before and Harry had his first final that day, Sunday
and then on Tuesday. He’d not done poorly in the first two races, the 400m free or the 400
IM, but both of those had always been the longest shots. He’d come in 6th and 7th
respectively - incredible, really, given where he’d been time wise in June of last year.

But the 800m free final had been on Tuesday and Harry came 2nd behind Bobby Finke, his
training partner.

Louis and Niall had watched it from Niall’s couch, holding hands the entire race because they
were so nervous. Niall didn’t even scold him when the popcorn container flipped in
celebration because he was that excited.

There was a long and confusing explanation on whether or not Harry could make the team
from that alone. But what it came down to was that it should be good enough, but it wasn’t
official. And it wouldn’t be until Sunday. Somehow this was making Harry more nervous for
his 1500m race on Sunday afternoon.

“You know, no matter what, I’m so proud of you, right?” Louis brushed a kiss to Harry’s
forehead and felt him exhale a hot breath on his throat. “We all are.”
Harry moved his hands from Louis’ arse to his lower back and pulled him up his lap so they
were in a tight hug.

“I know, it means everything to me. Really.”

Louis squeezed him back, smiling into his hair. Wishing he could force his belief, his own
strength into Harry. Or even better, peel back the nerves, the insecurity, and flush them down
the drain.

They held each other close for a moment longer before Louis pulled back and grabbed the
razor over Harry’s shoulder, handing it to Harry to hold. Then he took the shaving cream,
spraying some out onto his hand.

“Chest and arms?” Louis asked. “We can do your legs after.”

“Yup,” Harry said. “Shouldn’t be too bad, the bulk of it was taken off last Friday. It’s just
growth from this week.”

Louis nodded and rubbed a hand over Harry’s heart, feeling the barest stubble under his
fingers. Harry didn’t have a lot of chest hair anyway, but it was good to be thorough. He
smeared the shaving cream over Harry’s chest and then sniffed, a bemused smile curling on
his face.

“Is that lavender?”

Harry laughed, brightly, with his head tipped back so he could smile at Louis. “Yeah. I forgot
mine and Gemma lent me hers. Nice though, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, sunshine. Smells good.”

He accepted the razor back from Harry and then hesitated with the blade over his skin.

“It’s just like doing your face, except bigger and generally easier,” Harry offered, still smiling
at him. His eyes had gone a bit sparkly in the bathroom lighting, like maybe the steam from
the water and his closeness to Louis had stirred a bit of magic in them.

“Alright,” Louis said, pausing a moment more before making the first swipe.

He worked slowly across Harry’s chest, surely taking three times as long to do it as Harry
would have. But the bathwater was still warm and Harry was talking through the events
earlier in the week, his voice slow and syrupy around Louis, so neither of them were about to
complain.

After each swipe of the blade, Louis followed it with his fingertips on his other hand,
soothing over the skin and feeling if he missed anything. He rinsed the razor off in the water
as he went and it was becoming cloudy with soap. Harry’s hands were slowly caressing his
sides, his thighs, around his arse.

Louis ran a hand down Harry’s abs underneath the water, feeling for any stubble, and instead
bumped into Harry’s cock, hard and floating in the water. Licking his lips, he took him in his
left hand, stroking up firmly once.

Harry let out a stuttered moan, cutting off his sentence at, “-Thursday’s heats with-”

“Sorry,” Louis said with little apology, leaving a messy kiss on Harry’s temple. “Was just
right there.”

Harry swallowed and tilted his head up, so Louis leaned down and pressed their lips together,
still slowly working over Harry’s cock clumsily with his non-dominant hand. On his arse,
Harry’s hands tightened as he ran his tongue over Louis’. Heat curled through him, pleasure
burning through his body and straight to his own cock.

Most of Harry’s body still needed to be shaved and the water was slowly cooling around
them, but it didn’t feel like there was anything more important at the moment than the heady
space between them. He rocked closer so his cock bumped Harry’s stomach, just near where
his own hand was pulling, and then back into Harry’s firm grip. It felt so good with the warm
water lapping against his skin, even better when Harry spread his cheeks to run a finger
against his rim.

He moaned into Harry’s mouth, then breathed harshly against his lips. Moving his hand to
tug at Harry’s nipple, he blinked his eyes open when he remembered the razor was still
clutched in his fist.

Harry moved to kiss under his jaw, but Louis slowed his hand and then let go of Harry’s cock
all together. A whimper cut through the space between them and Louis’ couldn’t help but
laugh at how pitiful Harry sounded.

“I’ve got a lot of skin left to get to.” He ran his hand back up Harry’s abs and tweaked his
right nipple.

“We have time,” Harry said, looking up at him sweetly.

“Thought you wanted it done fast,” Louis teased, grinding back into Harry’s hands as if he
was doing something else entirely.

Harry licked his lips, dimples deep set in his cheeks as he looked up at Louis, voice rough
when he said, “Don’t want you to stop touching me.”

“I won’t,” Louis assured, running his hand down Harry’s arm. He shuffled slightly further
back in his lap, not far enough that Harry couldn’t still reach around and hold him, but to give
himself some more room to work.

Halfway through shaving one of Harry’s arms, he started to talk again. “I don’t remember
where I left off.”

“You were telling me about Thursday.” Louis ran the razor around Harry’s elbow carefully
and then traced it with his thumb.

“Right,” Harry said, blowing out a breath. “Right, yeah. Um, Gemma and I went to the heats
in the morning. She doesn’t even really like swimming all that much, but I didn’t want to go
alone.”

Louis hummed and listened to him rattle on as he finished Harry’s bicep. Then he lifted his
arm up and ran a finger through Harry’s armpit. Just the barest growth had reappeared. He
spread shaving cream on it, then tickled down Harry’s ribcage before rinsing his fingers off in
the water.

Each caress over Harry’s skin, each swipe of the razor felt like he was worshiping his body.
Like he was praying at the altar for some sort of deity and paying the price in devotion.

After he scooped up bathwater and rinsed off the remaining soap, he teased a finger down the
smooth surface of Harry’s underarm before kissing in the center of it. Right where Harry
smelt the most like himself.

Louis gave his left arm the same treatment and when his upper body was fully shaved, Louis
finally reached back under the water to take Harry’s cock in hand again.

They kissed as he pulled Harry off, going from a steady twist of their lips to Harry panting
against his tongue as he spilled over Louis’ fist. Through it all he held him, his left arm
wrapped around Harry’s shoulder, feeling each muscle flutter through ecstasy.

On the comedown, Harry laid his cheek against Louis’ so he could feel every quiver of his
lashes and then a smile rise on his face. A breath rushed past his ear and then Harry leaned
against the shower wall, his hands slipping off Louis’ body and into the cloudy water.

It was nearly cool around them now and Louis sat back against Harry’s thighs, stretching his
spine out. He’d been holding himself taut, hunched forward and focused, as he’d shaved
Harry’s upper body and sitting back now he felt almost like he did after a long study session.

“Gotta do your legs,” Louis said, cracking his neck and then every single one of his fingers.

“Okay,” Harry agreed, but didn’t move an inch.

Louis laughed and then stood on shaking legs out of the water. His knees were a bit sore from
kneeling on the tub floor, but he could barely feel it underneath the arousal still coursing
through him. With a hungry gleam in his eye, Harry looked up at Louis’ cock, still standing
firm, untouched for the entire time he’d been focused on Harry.

He ran a hand up the back of Louis’ calf and then circled his knees to scrape his nails up the
front of Louis’ thighs. Louis shivered under the touch and then laughed as Harry moved
forward with his tongue already out.

“We’re not done, sun.” Louis stepped back out of his grip and Harry’s lips twisted into a
pout. Rolling his eyes, he turned to pull the plug on the drain.

When he was still bent down, Harry’s hands ran back up his legs toward his arse. Louis
turned to see he’d scooted up in the tub to reach him properly, so he could press a kiss right
where Louis’ thigh met the underside of his arse.
“Baby,” Louis let out a sigh, freezing for a moment to relish the hotness of Harry’s breath
ghosting over him before reaching for Harry’s hand and clasping their palms together. He
straightened and turned on the slippery tub floor, catching himself with his spare hand on the
shower wall. “Get up for me.”

Harry’s mouth fell back into a pout again, but Louis’ tugged on their interlaced fingers, until
Harry stood as the last of the water drained from the tub. They were both covered in the dregs
of soap and probably Harry’s hair and maybe even his come. So, Louis turned on the shower,
then pulled Harry in for a sloppy kiss under the spray.

They kissed while the water warmed up, while the soap ran from their skin and down the
drain, while their hair got wet and fat droplets raced down their cheeks into their mouths. He
pressed his cock against Harry’s stomach, grinding into the smooth slickness of his belly and
moaned around the pleasure of it.

When it started to feel too good, he moved his mouth to kiss over Harry’s cheek and then
under his jaw to feel his pulse fluttering. Harry’s hands were rubbing all over him and,
despite him just coming a few minutes before, he was already half hard against Louis’ thigh.

Louis reached past him to grab the shaving cream and then angled the shower head against
the wall so it was just misting them.

“Put your leg on the edge,” Louis instructed, waiting for Harry following his order before
Louis sprayed shaving cream down the whole thing. Afterwards, he went in with his hands to
smear it over his skin. As he worked, Harry was looking down at him with his bottom lip
between his teeth, clearly loving the look of Louis bent between his spread legs.

When he rinsed his hands, Louis said, “I love your legs.”

He looked over to see Harry swallow hard. His eyes were low lidded with arousal, but they
had stayed that same sunny green that Louis loved. So clear, so lovely, even in pleasure.

Louis teased a finger up the inside of his thigh, all the way to his groin, licking his lips at the
way Harry shivered from the touch. The razor was on the edge of the tub and Louis reached
around Harry’s leg to grab it, before turning around into the space of his legs, facing away
from Harry.

“What are you doing?” Harry asked, his voice ragged.

“Feels more natural this way, don’t you think?” Smirking to himself as he said it, leaning
back against Harry’s chest, cradled between his thighs, with Harry’s cock fattening up against
his arse.

Harry ran a hand around his middle and pressed on his stomach, holding Louis to himself.
His words were quiet and whispered right into the side of Louis’ head, when he said, “Feels
right.”

Louis hummed and felt a flush burn through his whole body.
He leaned forward, Harry’s hand still on his stomach, thumb pressed right on his belly button
and fingers spread low enough they were in his pubic hair, and ran the first stripe of the razor
up Harry’s calf. Bent over like this had his arse right in Harry’s groin, cock digging into
Louis’ cheek in a delicious way.

With each stroke of the razor on Harry’s skin, and the corresponding run of his thumb over
the exposed skin, Louis felt his breathing getting more ragged. Something about being
surrounded by Harry on all sides, their bodies touching in every intimate way possible, the
care he was showing for Harry - it had him on edge.

As he leaned back to work on Harry’s thigh, Harry started mouthing at his neck. Just light,
barely there kisses. Drags of his tongue that had Louis feeling like his muscles were turning
to liquid.

He finished the front of Harry’s thigh, resolving to get the rest after, and instead turned his
face to meet Harry over his shoulder in a messy kiss. It was mostly tongue and the bite of
their teeth. Both of them were too hot, the gentle presses of their hands pulling the pleasure
between them as tight as a bowstring. Had it singing, echoing off the shower walls.

Louis pulled back, turning in Harry’s hold, to press their groins together in one mind
numbing grind. Harry’s leg dropped off the end of the tub and he leaned down to kiss Louis
again, but Louis leaned back with a sly grin on his face.

“I’ve got to do the other side.” Louis swirled his finger in the air. “Turn around.”

Harry let out a huff of faux annoyance, but turned slowly on the slippery tub floor. With the
shower head pointed at the wall, there was nothing but a misty humidity keeping them damp,
but not washing anything away. The last leftovers of the shaving cream still clung to the back
of Harry’s thigh.

He molded himself to Harry’s back, curving around the shape of him, his arms curling
underneath Harry’s to hug his chest tightly. When he pulled Harry back into his body, his
cock slid along the back of Harry’s thighs and then, from the slickness of the shaving cream,
slipped right in between both of them.

Louis let out a moan and dropped his head between Harry’s shoulder blades. The pressure
from Harry’s closed legs was stunning after how long he’d been hard. He thrust a couple of
times without really thinking about it, mindless to the tight heat of them.

“Fuck,” Harry moaned. Louis looked up to see Harry’s head drooped, hanging really, as if he
was lost in the sensation too.

He meant to pull out, to get back to shaving Harry’s legs, but he thrust forward instead. His
palms were flat on Harry’s chest and with one pinched Harry’s nipple, causing him to jerk
against him, tugging his cock tighter between his thighs.

“Baby, can I-” Louis started, but thrust again instead of finishing. His head was hazy with it
and he could hear how slurred his words were. Like a couple more minutes and he’d be
drooling against Harry’s shoulder.
“Yeah,” Harry groaned. “Yes, fuck, Lou.”

Harry shifted slightly and Louis realized he had moved his legs fully together and leaned
more of his weight against Louis’ chest. Harry’s arm rose up and reached around to hold
Louis’ head, fingers slipping in between the wet strands, and tugging, just slightly. Just the
way Louis liked it.

Thrusting faster, he lost his head in the tight vice of Harry’s thighs. With one hand he kept
playing with Harry’s nipples and rested the other low on his belly. Low enough he could feel
the sway of Harry’s cock as he rocked with Louis’ movement.

Louis mouthed at his shoulder and then the back of his neck. It felt so good, hypnotic even
with the steam of the shower and the slow, slow build between them.

Harry was starting to get loud in his arms, his moans and sharp intakes of breath echoing off
the tiles and wrapping tightly around them. Louis opened his eyes, realizing Harry was
tugging at his own cock in time with Louis’ thrusts between his legs.

With the hand on Harry’s belly, he scraped his fingertips down the rest of Harry’s smooth
stomach and then around the base of his cock. He didn’t interrupt Harry’s movements, just
pet around the skin, caressed over his balls, tugged them lightly in time with a thrust and a
pinch of his nipples.

Harry let out a long groan, clenched his legs together and came.

“Fuck,” Louis groaned, dropping his head back to Harry’s shoulders. Closing his eyes, he
focused on the trembles coursing through Harry’s body and the tightness surrounding him.
Harry tugged at his hair and slipped his other hand under the one Louis was using to still
twist at his nipple, lacing their fingers together and just held on. Their hands were over
Harry’s heart and he felt the steady rhythm of it as he spilled between Harry’s thighs.

His hips slowed and as he came down from the high he kissed along Harry’s shoulder blades
before squeezing him in a tight hug. When his heart slowed and his cock softened, he tapped
Harry on the hip so he’d loosen his legs and stepped back.

“Let me wash off your legs,” Louis said, voice rough.

Harry nodded and turned around. His eyes were a bit glassy, like maybe all that pleasure had
been overwhelming. Two orgasms in and Louis wasn’t even done shaving him. Harry hadn’t
been exaggerating when he said it would have been faster alone, it was probably taking Louis
five times as long.

The detachable shower head made quick work of the come and soap on Harry’s legs. Louis
ran his hands over each bit of exposed skin and kissed his arse cheek before standing back
up. Once he’d replaced the shower head, he laid a hand back on Harry’s waist, catching his
eyes.

“Still feeling good, sunshine?”

“Yeah, Lou,” Harry breathed out, then let out half a giggle. “Maybe a bit wobbly though.”

Louis smiled at him and then kissed his cheek. “Why don’t you sit down and I’ll do the rest
up quickly.”

Harry agreed and perched on the tub ledge, extending his legs as far as he could in the tub,
which, admittedly, was not far. Louis shaved his right leg as quick as he could, while still
giving it the same care and attention and then carefully shaved the back of both of them,
while Harry remained with his bum just on the edge of the tub.

When he was done, he rubbed his hands around Harry’s thighs to be sure they were cleanly
shaven and then kissed over each of his kneecaps. With the shower head, he rinsed Harry’s
legs and then they both stood under the spray and washed their bodies quickly.

Once they were dry they climbed into bed naked, slipping their legs together under the
sheets, and talked until they fell asleep. Finally, blissfully, back in the bubble of them.

Harry had his heat for the 1500m in the morning and he finished 3rd in the seeds, easily
making the final on Sunday. After his race and a massage, the five of them went to lunch.
Harry was a ball of nervous energy all day, antsy and knee shaking through three games of
Scrabble. Anne kept sending him anxious looks across the board each time Harry lost, who
was typically competitive to a fault.

When they went back to Harry’s room that night and climbed into bed, Louis sat cross legged
next to him. They’d stripped to their pants and Harry was slouched against the headboard,
worrying his bottom lip between his teeth.

“You’re nervous,” Louis stated, rather than asked. He knew it, he didn’t need Harry to
confirm it. But still, he nodded his head, curls dancing against the tops of his shoulders with
each jerk of his head.

“I can’t stop thinking about it.”

Louis ran a hand along the waistband of his pants, not sexually, but in a soothing way. “What
would help? I can take your mind off it, or we can keep your mind on it.”

Harry let out a breath.“On. I want to stay focused.”

“Alright, sunshine.” Louis scooted up the bed and leaned back against the headboard next to
Harry. “Come here.”

Harry turned and inched down the bed until his head was on Louis’ chest and his arm was
wrapped around his middle. He let out a deep breath, which ran hot down Louis’ air con
chilled skin.
“Tell me about the race,” Louis said, soothing a hand through his hair. “Every bit. Every
worry. I want to hear it.”

Harry started talking, his words slow and his story rambling. But he talked until his voice was
hoarse, until his fingers stopped nervously tapping against Louis’ ribcage, until his breathing
calmed and he’d fallen asleep.

Harry’s race didn’t start until the evening on Sunday and Louis walked to the stadium with
Harry’s family. All of them had nervous, shaking hands.

When he’d woken that morning Harry was already gone. They’d run through his whole
schedule the night before, so Louis knew he would be, but still he ran a hand over the cool
sheets next to him and sighed.

It was his last day in Indianapolis. He was on the very last flight out that night back to
Boston. In the lead up to the evening session, the only session of the day, Louis had done
some anxiety-ridden work on his laptop and then spent the afternoon with Harry’s family
where they all pretended like they were fine.

Now they climbed the steps up to their section, an excited energy filling the stadium. It was
the last day of races and the team would be official tonight. For every family member or fan
waiting to hear if their swimmer had made the team, this was the moment. It surely was for
the four of them as they settled into their seats.

“I’m going to throw up,” Gemma muttered under her breath.

Anne scoffed on the other side of her. “Don’t be dramatic. It’s going to be fine.”

Her words might have been more encouraging if it hadn’t sounded like she ground them out
with her teeth clenched. Like things better be fine or she’d make them that way herself.

“I can’t believe you’re calling me dramatic when you’re wearing that shirt.”

Anne looked down at herself, pulling out her white, hand printed t-shirt from her chest. On it
was a photo of Harry, a year or so ago, grinning widely at the camera with the words ‘We
think Harry has the Olympic Factor’ on it in a truly horrendous font.

“What’s wrong with my shirt? Look how cute your brother is!”

Gemma rolled her eyes. “You even made Louis wear one.”

He was indeed wearing a matching shirt. She’d shown them to him in the middle of their
scrabble tournament, thrusting a spare one in his hands. It didn’t require any convincing, to
be fair. The laugh Harry would let out seeing him in it was enough motivation alone to wear
it.

“He wanted to!” Anne protested.

“I love it,” Louis tossed in, just to add fuel to the family argument.

Gemma threw her hands up in exasperation, while Robin started talking over Anne to try to
keep the peace. The three of them continued to bicker until the meet started.

The first race was over quickly, just a mere 24 seconds for the women to swim the 50m free.
Afterwards, the stadium was abuzz. There was only one more event - Harry’s. The team
would be official sometime that evening and surely everyone was just as excited about it as
they were.

“Do you think he’s throwing up right now?” Gemma asked, clearly meaning Harry.

Louis let out a snort, but Anne swatted her arm.

“Don’t talk like that,” she scolded.

“It’s not like he can hear me,” Gemma drawled, rolling her eyes. “Besides, he probably needs
a laugh right about now, always so in his head before big meets.”

“He’s been way more level headed than usual,” Anne offered and then all three of them
leaned over to look at Louis.

An awkward laugh bubbled out of him. “I don’t think this is on me.”

“He gained this confidence from somewhere,” Robin said, smiling at him. “And I don’t think
it was from all those times Gemma pushed him in the pool.”

She squawked next to him and threw her hands up in the air. “It worked! I don’t know why
everyone has such a problem with a proven method!”

Placatingly, Anne patted her arm, but Robin was laughing on the other side of her, a hand
pressed to his belly over his ‘Gator Dad!’ t-shirt.

The lights in the stadium dimmed and spotlights started dancing on the top of the pool. After
a few minutes, every screen in the arena lit up with the event title.

The emcee began announcing the swimmers and they walked out one at a time, waving to the
crowd.

“In lane five, representing the University of Florida, is Harry Styles,” the announcer called.
Harry’s name flashed on the screen a second before he stepped into the tunnel and walked
out.

Robin was on his feet cheering, sticking two fingers in his mouth to let out a loud whistle that
had Anne jumping in her seat.

Harry walked to the chair behind lane five, his black tech suit running down close to his
knees and a big hoodie on to keep his muscles warm. It was easy to follow him from across
the stadium with the bright blue of his swim cap, a slash of white cutting through the top that
Louis knew were his wireless headphones.
All eight of the swimmers were behind their respective lanes, warming up their muscles,
adjusting caps, shaking out their limbs. Harry was nodding along to the music in his
headphones while he kicked off his slides, putting them in the bin next to his chair. Then he
glanced up, looking at the section they were in, probably hoping to see them, but Louis was
sure from this distance he couldn’t. Still, Harry smiled, his cheeks pushing up against his
goggles just before he pulled off his headphones and then the hoodie in quick succession.

The group of them were next to the blocks now, making adjustments and then climbing on.
Harry bent down in the starting position and Louis reached over to take Gemma’s hand.

He nearly apologized and let go, but she squeezed it tightly.

“I’m so nervous, I could puke,” she muttered and then laughed at herself. “Wish he didn’t
swim so fucking far, makes the wait nearly unbearable.”

Just as Louis nodded in agreement, over the speaker system rang, “Take your mark.”

The buzzer went and all the swimmers were off the blocks.

To Louis, it looked like Harry had a good start, but the race was nearly fifteen minutes long,
so it was too soon to tell how it would all play out.

For most of the race, he sat back in his seat, clutching Gemma’s hand over his jiggling knee.
When Harry hit the halfway point, Louis leaned forward, the whole line of his family pulling
forward together like there was a string connecting them. Maybe there was, they had all
linked hands as well.

Harry was in third, a full body length behind Bobby Finke in lane four and a shoulder length
behind a swimmer Louis didn’t recognize in lane six. His body sliced through the water as
gracefully as ever. Louis was so accustomed to how he looked in the water, the way his
stroke looked and his legs kicked, that he could tell he wasn’t rushing. Wasn’t pushing more
than he was intending to.

It meant Harry was exactly where he wanted to be at the half.

Knowing that did nothing to calm the nerves in Louis’ body. He felt himself breathing
harshly, as if he was swimming, as if this was his race to win. Sometimes being in the stands
was worse, he was pretty sure.

Harry turned with 150m to go and Gemma’s grip turned to a vice.

Under her breath she was muttering, “Come on, come on.”

Louis bit his lip as the bells rang in quick succession over lanes 4, 5, and 6 as they all made
the turn for the last 100 meters.

Robin was on his feet yelling down at the pool, cheering loudly as Harry’s kick increased into
the last turn.

With 50 to go he was .05 behind the second place swimmer and two full seconds off first.
“He has a great last 50,” Louis said aloud, maybe for himself more than anyone else.

He held his breath and watched as Harry inched up past the person next to him, then closed
the distance between his stroke and Bobby kicking in the lane next to him.

Gemma stood and the tugging of her hand had Louis rising to his feet as well, yelling out
with the rest of Harry’s family as he made the last, final stoke into the wall.

The board showed he was just, just behind Bobby and in second.

“That’s a new personal best,” Louis said, staring at the time. “That’s like four seconds faster
than prelims.”

Gemma cheered loudly, pulling her hand from Louis’ and wrapping it around his shoulder,
tugging him in for a hug. Louis laughed into it, looking back to the pool to see Harry hugging
Bobby over the lane divider, a broad smile on his face.

It was still only second, but he’d come in second twice.

The swimmers climbed out of the pool and Louis’ ears were ringing from how loud the
stadium was. He pressed a hand over his heart, relishing in how fast it was beating. In how
proud he was of Harry. It stung at his eyes, that pride, the joy that burned through him. Over
Gemma’s shoulder he saw Robin and Anne embracing, Harry’s mum subtly wiping at her
eyes.

“This is really happening,” Gemma said and then laughed loudly. Then she clamped a hand
over her mouth, her eyes welling up. “Oh, God, dad would be so proud. I can’t believe he’s
not here for this.”

She wiped at a stray tear and Louis gave her a kind smile. “Harry knows.”

As she was nodding, Anne wrapped an arm around her and pulled Gemma into a hug. It had
been Harry swimming in the pool, but this dream had never just been his. It belonged to each
member of his family, the coaches he worked with, his teammates. The joy of him succeeding
bubbled through all of them. It was so clear to Louis, how he could feel that in himself, how
he could see it in Harry’s family. They all just loved him, so much they were bursting from it.

With the races over, the crowd thinned and Louis checked the time on his phone. He had to
be leaving soon to make it to the airport on time for his flight. It was landing at a god awful
time back in Boston, but it was worth being tired tomorrow at work to be here for Harry now.

Swiping away notifications from Niall and Oli, he pulled up his text thread with Harry.

Harry

Louis: so proud of you baby!!!!!

Louis: gotta head out in a few for the airport
Most likely Harry was still in the warm down pool, cooling his muscles off. If not, he was
getting therapy on his legs. Louis really wanted to see him before he left, but he still needed
to go back to the hotel to get his bag and he didn’t have a lot of time.

They weren’t going to see each other until August now, though, and that ached a bit. He
wanted just another moment with him, his mind still snagging on the cool sheets that
morning, that empty space where Harry was meant to be.

“Have you heard from him?” Gemma asked. Louis looked up from his phone to see her
peeking at it.

Shrugging, as if it didn’t matter, as if his heart wasn’t stinging, he said, “Not yet.”

The four of them moved down the row and then descended the stairs, making their way to the
lobby. He was still jittery from adrenaline, feeling the excitement from the race all the way
through to his fingertips.

The stadium was still fairly full of people milling about. The official team announcement was
meant to be made at any moment and likely they were wanting to be around when it
happened. Louis wished he could stay for it, but he’d surely miss his flight if he didn’t get
going.

“Are you waiting?” he asked Harry’s family.

Anne and Robin both nodded, but Gemma said, “I’ll walk back to the hotel with you. These
shoes are giving me the worst blisters and I have to get out of them.”

Louis laughed and they made their way there quickly, chatting the whole way about the race.
Once he’d gotten off the lift at the fourth floor, he worked quickly to get the last of his bag
packed. With one hand shoving Harry’s spare hoodie into his duffel bag, he ordered an uber
with the other. The wait was longer than he was hoping for, but with the meet just ending
there were surely a lot of people in the queue.

Sighing, he went to take a piss while the car came. Just as he was flushing the toilet, the hotel
door opened. Louis sucked in a breath and turned to see Harry in the doorway to the
bathroom, his cock still halfway out of his jeans.

“Oops,” Harry breathed out. His chest was rising and falling dramatically, as if he’d run
there.

“Hi, baby,” Louis said a bit dumbly, so stunned to see him standing there he forgot for a
moment his trousers weren’t even zipped.

“I thought I’d missed you,” Harry said, pressing a hand to his stomach as he breathed in
deeply.

“Car is taking forever,” Louis mumbled, finally tucking himself away. The shock was starting
to wear off and he finally took in Harry’s appearance, fat water stains on his shoulders from
his wet hair and his hoodie collar pulled far enough to the side to see he didn’t have a shirt on
underneath. Like he’d left in a hurry. “Baby, I’m so-”

The words dried up in his throat or maybe were flooded over with emotion, so overwhelming
and sudden that Louis felt the soreness of it right in the middle of his chest.

He stumbled forward half a step, his hand catching on Harry’s waist, and felt it sear through
him - the way he wanted to finally just say exactly what he was feeling.

“God, I love you. I’m so fucking proud of you.” Louis pressed a hand over his heart, felt it
beating fast, like it was about to jump into his palm. “I’m just bursting with it.”

With wide eyes and mouth parted, Harry let out a shuddering breath and pulled him all the
way in for a tight hug. His face tucked into Louis’ throat and Louis felt his mouth move, like
an imprint on his skin, when Harry said, “I love you too.”

Louis closed his eyes and squeezed him tightly, holding on, their hearts hammering into the
space between them. He’d been holding the words in for too long now, the root of them, the
first taste of love, had been growing inside of him probably since that very first night. Staring
at Harry across a blue lit pool, hair plastered to his head and his eyes a gorgeous clear
reflection of the water, Louis had known then he was something he didn’t want to lose.

Pulling back, he rubbed a thumb across Harry’s cheekbone and relished the look on his face.
The joy tugging at the creases by his eyes, the pleased curl of his lips, and the heat under his
own finger where Harry’s cheeks had gone pink.

Just as he was about to lean in for a kiss, his phone started buzzing on the vanity.

“Fuck,” he muttered, but Harry laughed, just a huff of a giggle blown out against his cheek.
“It’s probably the uber.”

Louis answered the call while still in Harry’s arms, saying he’d be right down and hanging up
quickly. Silence sat between them for a moment, a blissful last second before the bubble
popped.

“I’ve got to go.”

“I’ll ride with you to the airport,” Harry said, soothing a hand down Louis’ arm and then
lacing their fingers together.

He thought about protesting, it was silly for him to pay for a second uber to get back to the
hotel, stupid of him to waste the time, but Louis understood what he meant. Neither of them
were ready to part.

“Let’s go then.”

It didn’t take long to collect his things and climb into the back of the car. The airport was
only a twenty minute ride and they spent most of it talking about the race and what was to
come.
“I haven’t gotten the call yet, so it’s not official, but-” Harry let out a shuddering breath, a shy
smile on his face. “I’d have to be in Raleigh next week for the training camp and then after
two weeks we’d fly to London until the games start.”

Louis squeezed his hand where they were laced on Harry’s lap. “Can’t believe the first time
you’re in England it won’t be with me.”

“I know.” Harry shook his head and smiled down at their hands. “You’ll have to tell me all
the spots to go to.”

“Never spent too much time in London, but I can think of a few.”

“Maybe I’ll save some for when we can go together.”

It was warm between them where their knees were pressed together and Louis wished there
was enough space, or that they were somewhere else, so he could climb into Harry’s lap. So
he could melt into him for just a bit longer.

Through the window, the streetlights lit them up in sporadic washes of yellow, bathing them
in gold. At least for brief moments in time and it felt so fitting, so right, for it to feel like the
sun was shining on them even in the dark.

When the driver pulled into departures, they climbed out under the sign for the airline, and
moved inside slower than his flight time really required. He was cutting it close to get
through security in time, but he’d always drag his feet to spend a minute more with Harry.

They stood off to the side, right across from where the line for security started and curved
towards each other soaking in their last moments.

“I’m going to miss you,” Harry sighed, letting the words hang and weigh on them before
adding, “Two months is too long.”

Louis moved half a step closer, slipping a hand around Harry’s wrist so he could press his
thumb to his pulse. “Less than two months, really. By at least a week, so it’s hardly awful at
all.”

“Right,” Harry snorted.

“Besides,” Louis started. He wished they’d had more time to talk in the hotel so they could
be having this conversation privately. At least then he’d be able to hold Harry as they did.
“It’s not for nothing, right? Like, for both of us, it’s all that hard work coming to fruition.
Being apart sucks and I’ll miss you like fucking crazy, but I’d rather you were there than in
Boston with me.”

Nodding his head, Harry let out a deep breath. “You’re right. Why are you always so
annoyingly right?”

“Part of my charm, sunshine.”

Harry laughed, so brightly that Louis swore the lights in the airport dimmed around him.
“Excuse me,” a woman’s voice cut through their conversation. “Are you Harry Styles?”

Harry turned to face her and Louis’ finally let go of his wrist, shuffling backwards. Hovering
right next to them was a woman in her early forties and her daughter, who looked to be about
ten. The girl had on a much too large USA Swimming t-shirt that matched the one Harry had
been wearing on Louis’ first night in Indianapolis.

“Yes, ma’am,” Harry said, his voice falling into a southern politeness that Louis had never
heard before.

“Gosh,” she started, fluttering her hand in front of her. “We just saw you compete, you did so
well. What a rush there at the end.”

Harry smiled at her kindly. “Thank you, I’m really pleased with how it went tonight. What’s
your name?”

“I’m Carolyn, this is my daughter Maggie. She just started swimming on a club team last
year so we thought we’d come out.” She smiled at the both earnestly, her arm curving around
Maggie’s back. “She was cheering you on the whole meet.”

Maggie stayed quiet next to her mother, cheeks pink and her body shyly turned inwards, but
she smiled up at Harry.

“Thank you so much, Maggie. I wish I had my cap or goggles with me to give you, but I left
them at the hotel. I was just dropping my b-” Harry cut himself off, his hand half raising to
point at Louis. The unsaid word hung between them for a moment before he cleared his
throat and finished, “Louis, here, off for his flight.”

Louis gave them a short, aborted wave, still hung up on the way Harry almost said boyfriend
to total strangers, fans even. He hunched a bit to be closer to Maggie’s eye level and asked
her, “Did you want a picture with Harry?”

She nodded and her mother said, “Oh that would be splendid. Let me just-”

Digging through her purse, she pulled out her phone triumphantly and handed it to Louis,
who backed up a few steps to get them all in frame. Maggie clung to one side of Harry and
Carolyn to the other, the three of them grinning widely as Louis snapped several photos in
succession.

“Thank you so much, again,” Carolyn said, taking her phone back from Louis.

“Of course, it was so nice to meet y’all.”

Maggie was still hovering by his side and finally she said in a small voice, “Good luck at the
Olympics, Harry.”

Harry blushed, his cheeks turning pink, like the words probably still didn’t feel real and he
wasn’t sure what to do with them. “Thank you, Maggie. I hope you’ll be watching to cheer
me on?”
She nodded vigorously before moving back to her mother’s side. A moment later they walked
off towards the security line, waving as they went.

After a quiet moment, Harry rubbed a hand over his face and let out a breath. “That was
wild.”

“More to come than that, baby,” Louis said, smiling at him. Harry shook his head in disbelief,
smiling bashfully down at his shoes. “I hate to say it, but…”

“You need to go.”

“Cutting it very close,” Louis said, stepping into Harry’s space again. He didn’t want to push
his boundaries, especially knowing that there were people here who recognized him.

But Harry didn’t seem as worried, pulling Louis into a hug. Sinking into it, he breathed in
Harry’s scent. All chlorine since he hadn’t showered since the race, but the chemical smell
was almost a balm to his heart now.

“I miss you,” Harry said, kissing his temple. “Already and you haven’t even left yet.”

“Me too,” Louis mumbled, closing his eyes tightly around the clenching of his heart.

“Call me when you land.” Harry pulled back to look at his face, his hands caressing over his
back. “I love you. God, it feels so good to finally say it.”

Louis laughed, feeling his eyes crinkle in delight at the person in front of him. “I love you
too, sunshine.”

Quickly, before he even really had time to lean into it, Harry kissed him and then stepped
back. Louis felt like his heart was caught in his throat and he stood there for a tick longer
before he picked his bag up off the floor.

“You’re going to do amazing things, H. I just know it.”

“So are you, Lou.” Harry pressed a hand over his own heart and finally, horrendously, Louis
walked towards security.

By 8:30 in the morning Louis had already had two cups of tea and was working his way
through a vanilla latte. His flight had landed after midnight and by the time he’d gotten from
Logan to Niall’s flat and into bed it was going on two. Dragging himself up to go to work for
7:30 had been brutal, but he didn’t have any regrets for how the weekend had gone.

Honestly, it couldn’t have gone any better. Despite the exhaustion, he still felt the tingly,
popping candy feeling under his skin, like his fingertips had fallen asleep and he couldn’t
shake them out. Harry loved him back. Harry’s dreams were coming true.

He took another sip of his coffee and shook his head, trying to focus on the research
assignment he’d been given first thing. Around him, the other summer associates were
chatting about their weekends, leaning well back in their chairs just wiggling their cursors
every couple of minutes so their computer screens didn’t go black.

“I was so hungover yesterday and Patrick called me at 8am with an ‘urgent matter’ he needed
me to take care of,” Michaela, a 2L from Northeastern, bemoaned. “I think he has special
powers, the sight or something, because he always seems to know when you absolutely
cannot handle work and that’s just when he calls.”

Charlie laughed loudly and Louis’ eye twitched. He liked them maybe the most of the other
summer associates, but they were such a morning person that it made Louis want to die some
days. Today especially.

“Girl, you spent all Friday talking about the rave you were going to on Saturday. That doesn’t
take a sixth sense to figure out.”

Michaela tossed a paper clip at them, but it flew over Charlie’s shoulder and Louis looked
over just in time to see it land right next to a pair of brown dress shoes. A quiet squeak came
from Michaela’s desk and she had a hand over her mouth, her cheeks pinking up around it.

“Mark, good morning!” she said with too much cheerfulness. “That just slipped right out of
my hand.”

Charlie pressed their lips together around a laugh and Louis very nearly scoffed.

“Michaela, lots of energy this morning, I see,” Mark said drolly and Michaela’s blush
somehow deepened. “How are you all?”

They all murmured their answers, each one a form of good, and you? and he looked a bit
bemused at them. They were never not going to be at least a little on edge when a partner
walks into their workspace first thing on Monday morning.

Mark was Louis’ favorite of the partners and probably the one they all saw the most. Patrick
was one of his associates so Louis had been filtered a lot of his case work and he’d often send
feedback via email that was constructive, but kind. From what the other summer associates
said, this was not the norm.

“Louis, can I have a word?” Mark was smiling at him, one hand in his pocket and the other
holding a coffee cup with a big rainbow swirl on it.

Nervousness clawed over him, but Louis nodded, pushing out of the chair. “Sure, of course.”

As he stood, Charlie’s face had pulled wide into a comical looking grimace. Michaela still
had her hand to her face, the embarrassment on her cheeks glowing under the fluorescent
lights.
On their way to the office, Mark said, “Did you have a nice weekend? You were off on
Friday, right?”

Louis nodded, hoping that wasn’t about to become an issue. He knew that the summer
associate position was meant to be a long job interview and he’d felt risky asking for just one
day off. “It was very nice, yeah. Had a family event out of town, so I really appreciate the
time off.”

Mark closed the office door behind him and gestured to the chair opposite his desk for Louis
to sit on.

“You met my husband, Carlos, at the company picnic, didn’t you?” Mark asked, leaning back
in his large leather chair. He had a smile on his face that almost looked playful, but Louis
couldn’t discern why.

“Yeah,” Louis laughed. Carlos had stood next to him as Louis listened politely to Maria in
accounting talk about her baked beans recipe for five minutes, then forced them onto his
plate, and he’d let out a long, loud laugh when Louis dumped the whole thing in the trash
after she walked away. “He seems lovely.”

Which was true. Louis had given him a conspiratorial look afterwards and they’d ended up
chatting for the better part of an hour. It wasn’t until Mark had joined them at the end of the
conversation that he realized it was one of the partner’s spouses.

“He said the same about you,” Mark said, laughing. “Funnily enough he was absolutely
certain that he saw you on TV last night.”

Louis felt his body freeze, his smile stuck on his face, and a cold rush ran down his spine. He
hadn’t done anything wrong, but it sure felt like it.

“We aren’t much for sports, but Carlos loves the Olympics.”

A blush burned on his cheeks and it felt like two seconds too long until he got his tongue to
work. “I’ve never really watched it before.”

Mark raised one bemused eyebrow. “Seems like you might be this year.”

His ears were so hot, he could feel them radiating against the hair on the back of his head. As
if a heat lamp was shining right on him.

Then Mark laughed, shaking his head at Louis. “Come on, son. Nothing to be embarrassed
about. We were just surprised to see you there, in Indianapolis of all places.”

“Well, yes, that is-” he cleared his throat, unsure of what to say. Unsure what this
conversation was even meant to be about. “I had a, uh, friend racing.”

The smile that twitched on Mark’s face showed he was seeing through Louis’ stumbling.

“Right, very exciting to see he made the team. He must be thrilled.”

Louis nodded, his fingers tingling under the table. “It’s all been a bit of a whirlwind I think.”

“I can imagine.” Mark smiled again then clasped his hands on top of his desk. “Well, I asked
you to come in here this morning because I was having a chat with Patrick and I didn’t
realize we had you on for twelve weeks this summer.”

“Oh, yeah, I did end up starting two weeks earlier than the other associates.” Louis shifted on
his seat and wondered if he was about to be reprimanded for something. “Patrick had said
that wouldn’t be an issue.”

“No, he told me that as well. It definitely has been clear in your work that those two weeks
have made a significant difference, but why don’t we drop it back down to ten like the other
associates. Just to keep things fair.”

“Well, um-” Louis started, unsure and fish-mouthing, pulse picking up sickeningly.

“And we’ll see you back here next summer, alright?”

Next summer. Next summer. They were only halfway through this summer, but Mark was
already confirming he was all set for next year, which most likely meant after graduation…
Louis clutched his trembling hands together under the table.

“That would be great, thank you, really,” he managed to say without his voice shaking.
Running through his mind was the calendar for the summer, but he couldn’t quite figure out
math. “So, when do we think my last week would be?”

“Patrick should be getting you an updated email over as we speak, but I believe he had it
noted down to end the 19th, if that’s amenable?”

His pulse rushed in his ears. The 19th. Blinking rapidly, all of the possibilities ran through
him in rapid succession. The 19th. The games started on the 26th and he didn’t have to be
back to Gainesville until the week of August 12th. If he was alone, he’d be pressing a hand to
his chest to try to calm his heart, which felt like it was about to burst out of his skin.

But as he was still in Mark’s office, he let out a feeble, “Yes, I think that would work
perfectly.”

Across from him, Mark sent him a warm smile. “Great, if you have any more questions on it
Patrick should have all the details.”

Louis nodded and stood on shaking knees. “Thank you again, Mark.”

“Of course,” he said, waving his hand as if it was nothing. As if he hadn’t secured Louis’
future and given him the ability to watch his boyfriend do the same in one meeting.

Louis gave him another smile and turned towards the door. When he was halfway out of it,
Mark called out from behind him.

“And good luck to your swimmer, I’m sure he’ll be excited to hear of your change in plans.”
With a blush rising in his cheeks, he turned back to see Mark had a smug look on his face. He
clearly knew, understood what friend meant. He’d probably been there himself before.

Which was why Louis felt comfortable saying, “Oh, I’m sure he’s about to lose his goddamn
mind.”

Mark’s laughter followed him out of the room as he walked quickly back to his desk. His
hands were still a bit shaky and he felt so excited he could scream. Like he could genuinely
lose it for once.

Charlie was trying to catch his eye when he made it back to their cubicles, but he didn’t look
at them, didn’t look at anyone, just swiped his phone off his desk and turned back around. His
spine was snapped so tight, his shoulders stiff, like if he gave an inch, it’d be a mile and he’d
be screaming around the whole office.

As he walked away, he heard Michaela say, “Do you think he was just fired?”

“Girl, you’re so dumb,” Charlie scoffed and Louis smiled to himself as he weaved his way
through the office towards the bathrooms in the back.

Pushing inside, he called Harry with shaking hands. It rang twice before he answered.

“Hi!” His voice was cheerful as it cut through the line. “Everything okay?”

“Yes,” Louis squeaked out. “Yes, everything is fucking great.”

He laughed, a bit gleefully, a bit insane sounding even to his own ears.

“Lou?” Harry laughed along with him even though he didn’t know what about, but just
because he fed off Louis’ joy.

“They cut me back to ten weeks,” Louis breathed out. Knocking his head back against the
bathroom door, he closed his eyes and smiled. “I finish up on July 19th.”

“What?” Harry yelped.

“Ostensibly to keep it fair of course, but one of the partners, Mark? Him and his husband
watched the meet last night and they must have shown your family in the stands. I think, I
mean it sounds wild, but I think he did it on purpose. So I could go.”

That had to be the truth of it. What did it matter to them if Louis was there for an extra two
weeks, especially if they were intending to have him on for next summer anyway? All
experience was worth it and maybe Louis would have argued that, if it didn’t feel like he’d
been given a gift.

“Oh my fucking God,” Harry said, voice in a bit of disbelief and then he laughed. “Oh my
God, oh, Lou.”

“I’m so-” Louis started, cutting himself off with a laugh. “Oh, God, I get to have you in
Paris.”
“Stop,” Harry mumbled, and then sniffed like he might have been crying. “It’s too much.”

He pressed a hand to his heart, still hardly believing this was real. “In a good way?”

“The very best way,” Harry assured. “I love you. I’m like - aflutter about it all.”

His laugh was like a warm balm cutting through the phone. It curled around Louis and held
him tight.

“Me too, baby.”

“I’ve got to tell my mom, she was going to get all the travel stuff sorted today. I guarantee,
she’s about to lose her mind.” Through the phone, Louis heard the door of the hotel room
close. “Do you have a minute to stay on the line?”

There was still a pile of work he had to get through, but for right now, this was all he wanted
to focus on.

“Yeah, sunshine. I have time.”

Louis stumbled on the very last step of the stairs up to Niall’s third floor flat. It was half one
in the morning and he was a little bit drunk, but it was the last day of his summer
associateship, so a celebration of sorts had been in order.

Patrick had organized a night out and they’d gone in their work clothes, all getting sloppier as
the night went on. Louis was dragging his suit jacket behind him now as he tried to unlock
Niall’s front door.

His friends had come out to meet them partway through the night and it had reminded him so
much of being in undergrad. Getting hammered with Niall hanging off his shoulder pouring
drinks down his throat. But now, they had Oli on FaceTime laughing at their antics from
Chicago and Niall carried a tipsy Zayn home at the end of the night rather than Louis.

When he got inside he kicked his shoes off at the door, resolving to straighten them out
before Niall got home in the morning. He slid through the living room on his socks, crashing
into the bathroom door with a giggle.

While he brushed his teeth, he checked his phone for the first time in hours. Oli had sent him
a TikTok with a message underneath that just said, “this u?”

The thumbnail of the link looked to be Harry, a pool glittering behind him, with was text on
the screen in white that he wasn’t able to read before opening.
Oli

Oli: this u?
Louis: you know i hate tiktok
Oli: just watch it

Louis spit out the toothpaste and rinsed his mouth before opening the link.

It loaded and Harry started talking on screen immediately.

“-‘ve loved swimming since I was a little kid, so this is such a dream come true for me. Um,
my pre meet ritual? Well, I have a playlist I always listen to before a big meet to, like, get me
focused. It’s in a very specific order, and the very last thing is a message from my partner
just, like, saying how much they believe in me.”

And then it looped. With his alcohol soaked brain it took him a minute to comprehend, to
really understand, what Harry was saying. Once it hit, he had to watch it twice more. The
words my partner rattled in his head. The way Harry had blushed a bit as he said it, just
barely noticeable on the video, but Louis knew every nuance of his face. He could spot it
anywhere.

Over top of Harry on the video, in white text, it said, “So, who else is cheering on team USA’s
queer swimmer?”

Louis gasped seeing the word queer filtering over Harry’s face as he moved on screen, how
the ‘r’ of the word disappeared into his dimple more than once as Harry smiled.

“Shit,” Louis muttered. From the description box, Louis could see the clip was credited to
Team USA’s ‘Meet the Team’ series and he remembered Harry saying he was filming his
little clip a couple of weeks ago now, but it must have just come out. The video was only
posted a few hours ago, but had a decent amount of views and a lot of comments.

He couldn’t read them without having an account and debated it for a split second before
saying, “Fuck it,” and loading it onto his phone.

The comments were a mess of “this isn’t a coming out” to “some people just like to say
partner” to “not everyone is gay” and Louis read them all with his lips sucked into his mouth.
But then he came across one with a slew of replies underneath. It read:

Met them in the airport after trials. Very cute couple! His boyfriend even offered to take our
photo.

He squinted at the tiny icon and thought maybe user SwimMom369 could have been Carolyn
from the airport, but he wasn’t sure. There were a dozen or so comments underneath and he
read through them carefully.

The second to last one read, “They are so cute! My roomie is on the UF team and I’ve seen
him at a bunch of meets this year. Even saw them on campus a few times. Harry seems so
happy!”

It had Louis pausing for a moment. Harry did seem happy. Not just in general, but in the
video. Sun shining on his wet hair, a Team USA shirt stretching across his chest, and grinning
the whole time. There was nothing on his face to say he was uncomfortable, to indicate that
he wasn’t saying exactly what he wanted to be saying.

Closing the comments, he watched the video a couple more times. Tiktok user Mariaaaak was
right, Harry looked happy, comfortable. It had something swelling in his chest.

Louis thumbed over to their text conversation. It had been fairly quiet today, with it being
Louis’ last day of work and a double session for Harry. Plus, they were one week into
training in London, so even though there was only a five hour time difference, it did make it a
bit inconvenient.

He hovered over the keyboard now, several thoughts from the video running through his
head. Starting and stopping a couple of times, he looked up to read over their messages from
that morning instead.

Harry

Harry: Can’t believe I’m having an

English breakfast without
you for the first time
Harry: It’s not as good as yours
Louis: it’s because of the beans
💙
Harry: Actually…
Louis: baby noooo they are awful

It was ridiculous how much a string of words could make his pulse race, make his heart feel
ready to burst. Got him itching to hear his voice. The time on his phone showed it was
inching ever closer to two, which meant it was near seven for Harry. He’d probably be awake
by now.

It rang so long Louis was sure it was going to roll over and end when the screen finally
loaded.

“Lou?” His face was buried in the pillow still, hair flopping over the white pillow, but there
was a smile curving on his face.

“Good morning, sunshine,” Louis whispered, his voice gone soft immediately. Like the
whole bathroom had gone blurry aside from where his hand was clutching the phone.

Harry closed his eyes at the sound of his voice, his smile pulling wider, like it was doing
something for him, those three words whispered just for him.

“Sorry for waking you up,” he added. The early morning sun was cutting across the bed,
turning his brown hair bronze in the light.
“It’s okay,” Harry mumbled, pulling the duvet higher and cocooning Louis under the blanket
with him. “Was meant to be up a bit ago, but I snoozed my alarm. Quite late there though,
isn’t it?”

“Yeah, I just got home a bit ago. Brushed my teeth and thought about you.” Louis flashed
him a bright smile, showing all his teeth and then bit into his bottom lip to hear Harry laugh.

“How did your party go?”

“Okay, I guess.” Louis turned off the bathroom light as he spoke and walked into his
makeshift bedroom. “I feel grateful they had anything at all. I know I can be a bit prickly-”

Harry cut him off with a snort and Louis rolled his eyes.

“Hush. I just mean, like, it was nice to maybe fit in for once.” He dropped the phone to the
bed and started undoing the buttons on his shirt. “I know that’s on me for being an
overbearing control freak, or whatever.”

“Like that about you, if it helps,” Harry offered.

“Thanks, baby.” Louis huffed a laugh. “I tried pretty hard to be more open with them. Or just
nicer in general. Probably having next year confirmed already had me loosening up. Charlie
even said they’d miss me if you can believe.”

“I can,” Harry mumbled. “I miss you every day, ‘s not hard for me to imagine anyone else
feeling the same.”

“Not for long now,” Louis teased, tossing his shirt in the laundry bin and then tugging his
trousers off quickly. “This time next week we’ll be kissing in Paris.”

“I can hardly believe it,” Harry sighed into the pillow. “Any of this, really. It’s amazing even
being here in London. Though, I’ll admit, I got a bit teary eyed in Costa yesterday.”

Picking back up his phone, Louis sat down on the laid out futon, his back against the wall.
“What, did the barista tell you off for how much milk you want in your tea? You can just
admit you don’t like it, baby.”

“No, she was very nice about that actually,” he said with a pout, before pushing the covers off
and sitting up a bit against the headboard. Louis could see for the first time in their call that
he was bare chested, his tan skin golden in the morning sunshine. He pressed a hand over his
heart and said, “Everyone sounds a bit like you. Made me ache a bit.”

The words rattled through him and settled painfully into his chest. “Baby.”

Harry waved a hand at the camera. “It’s fine, I think I’d just been talking to Mike a bit before
that and it got me feeling some type of way.”

“Really? What did Mike have to say?”

“Tickets go on sale for the first football game on Monday. He wanted to know if we were
going.”

Louis pulled his knees up and rested his phone on them, trying to form that intimate bubble
he always had with Harry across an ocean. It wasn’t easy, but he tried to convince himself it
was working.

“Oh, a chance for you to whisper football terms in my ear and stare at my arse for three hours
again? Sign me up.”

Harry laughed loudly, tucking his chin down so he could keep his eyes on Louis.

“That’s exactly what I was thinking. Feels like an anniversary for us.”

“Yeah, sunshine. I think I fell in love with you a little bit right there.”

“Me too, Lou. I thought I was having a heat stroke for the first half of the game because my
heart was racing every single time I looked at you.”

Louis giggled, delighted. “I felt ready to do just about anything to keep your eyes on me.”

“You’ve never needed to worry about that. I can’t look away.”

“Me either.” What he wouldn’t give to be able to climb through that phone and right into a
London summer with Harry. Slip right into his bed and under the covers where he belonged.
“Feels crazy sometimes how it was just meeting the right person-”

“At the right place,” Harry added, butting in.

“At exactly the right time,” Louis finished, stroking his thumb down the side of the screen as
if it was his face. “I feel so lucky to have you.”

“God me too, like the last year has just been the biggest whirlwind of my life - with every
aspect of it. Everything just slotted exactly into place.”

“I know I’ve said it eight million times over the last couple of months, but I’m just so proud
of you, H. In every way possible.” On screen, Harry tucked his chin down, a pink flush on his
face. With the sun growing brighter in the room around him, it reminded Louis a lot of how
he’d looked in the video. “Oli sent me a clip from that interview you did, where you mention
your partner.”

“Oh, it was posted?”

Louis nodded. “I thought it was brave of you to say that. I wasn’t sure if you knew it might
be taken, well, in the comments…”

“I knew what I was saying, Lou. You don’t need to worry.” Harry sat up a bit higher, the
duvet falling all the way down to his hips. “When they asked… I don’t know. I just wanted to
be truthful. Your support has been so important to me this year, it’s buoyed me when things
were hard, when I felt like shit. Even when we were fighting, just hearing you say those
things, I don’t know, it just always helped. You always help.”

“I was worried at first, but then I thought that I could see it on your face. That you knew what
you were doing.”

“You know that I’ve not always had the easiest time seeing the path forward, but it’s never
been more obvious to me than it is now. Everything I need to do, like steps one after another,
just like you said.” Harry smiled at him, so softly, radiating such warmth that Louis felt it
encircle him, cradle him, all the way across the Atlantic. “At the end of it, it’s us. I can see it
clearly now.”

“For me too, sun,” Louis breathed out.

“I know, I have no doubt. That belief made me feel brave. Safe.” Harry bit his lip and then
grinned at him. “Besides, I’m going to kiss you on top of the Eiffel Tower, so it’s best to get
ahead of it, right?”

It burst out of him, the laugh, like a little bright thing he couldn’t contain.

“You’re going to want one of those dumb perspective pictures where it looks like you’re
holding it up, aren’t you?”

“Yes!” Harry laughed loudly. “I definitely am!”

“I’m so excited to be there with you, to celebrate both our successes together. There are so
many places I want to take you. Food I want you to eat. Once your races are over, I hope we
have a little time.”

“We will,” Harry assured. “I’m sure of it.”

Louis slid down the bed and then pulled the blankets over him. He was getting so sleepy, the
buzz mostly worn off, the long day catching up to him.

“I need to get up for morning swim,” Harry groaned, leaning forward and stretching out his
neck and back.

“I’ll stay with you till you have to go,” Louis said around a yawn. “And then this time next
week we’ll be together again.”

Harry’s nose scrunched as he smiled warmly. “I love you, you know that?”

In a few minutes they’d hang up. Harry would go downstairs for breakfast and then start his
last week of practice before the games. Across the ocean, he’d finally fall asleep, his phone
still on his chest as if it was the weight of Harry’s head instead. In a few days he’d fly back to
Florida with all of his things, storing them in Harry’s parent’s guest room before they flew as
a unit to Paris. Everything was coming together, lining up, and working out exactly the way
he had wanted it to.

But first, this.

 “I love you too,” Louis whispered. The room was dark around him, pitch black, but Harry
was the light pouring out, filling him up. “My sunshine, my baby.”

Chapter End Notes

I did pop a cheeky little nod to These Inconvenient Fireworks, just for shits and giggles.

Thank you so much for sticking with me and reading this all the way through!! I hope
you had as much fun reading their journey as I had writing it.

Again, you can find me here: FIC POST | TWITTER POST. And if you want to come

💛
hoot, holler, cry, throw up (idk however you feel) in the comments or in my inbox
@harruandlou on tumblr and @staybfics on twitter you absolutely can
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