Professional Documents
Culture Documents
A Modern Introduction To Classical Electrodynamics 1St Edition Michele Maggiore Full Chapter PDF
A Modern Introduction To Classical Electrodynamics 1St Edition Michele Maggiore Full Chapter PDF
https://ebookmass.com/product/introduction-to-classical-chinese-
vogelsang/
https://ebookmass.com/product/a-modern-introduction-to-dynamical-
systems-richard-brown/
https://ebookmass.com/product/a-modern-introduction-to-fuzzy-
mathematics-1-edition-apostolos-syropoulos/
https://ebookmass.com/product/introduction-to-modern-
analysis-2nd-edition-kantorovitz/
(eBook PDF) Introduction to Philosophy: Classical and
Contemporary Readings 8th Edition
https://ebookmass.com/product/ebook-pdf-introduction-to-
philosophy-classical-and-contemporary-readings-8th-edition/
https://ebookmass.com/product/ebook-pdf-introduction-to-
mythology-contemporary-approaches-to-classical-and-world-
myths-4th-edition/
https://ebookmass.com/product/introduction-to-
autocad-2024-a-modern-perspective-paul-richard/
https://ebookmass.com/product/after-ancient-biography-modern-
types-and-classical-archetypes-1st-ed-edition-robert-fraser/
https://ebookmass.com/product/a-gendered-lens-for-genocide-
prevention-1st-edition-mary-michele-connellan/
A MODERN INTRODUCTION TO CLASSICAL ELECTRODYNAMICS
OXFORD MASTER SERIES IN PHYSICS
The Oxford Master Series is designed for final year undergraduate and beginning graduate students in physics and related
disciplines. It has been driven by a perceived gap in the literature today. While basic undergraduate physics texts often show
little or no connection with the huge explosion of research over the last two decades, more advanced and specialized texts
tend to be rather daunting for students. In this series, all topics and their consequences are treated at a simple level, while
pointers to recent developments are provided at various stages. The emphasis is on clear physical principles like symmetry,
quantum mechanics, and electromagnetism which underlie the whole of physics. At the same time, the subjects are related
to real measurements and to the experimental techniques and devices currently used by physicists in academe and industry.
Books in this series are written as course books, and include ample tutorial material, examples, illustrations, revision points,
and problem sets. They can likewise be used as preparation for students starting a doctorate in physics and related fields,
or for recent graduates starting research in one of these fields in industry.
Michele Maggiore
Département de Physique Théorique
Université de Genève
Great Clarendon Street, Oxford, OX2 6DP,
United Kingdom
Oxford University Press is a department of the University of Oxford.
It furthers the University’s objective of excellence in research, scholarship,
and education by publishing worldwide. Oxford is a registered trade mark of
Oxford University Press in the UK and in certain other countries
© Michele Maggiore 2023
The moral rights of the author have been asserted
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in
a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, without the
prior permission in writing of Oxford University Press, or as expressly permitted
by law, by licence or under terms agreed with the appropriate reprographics
rights organization. Enquiries concerning reproduction outside the scope of the
above should be sent to the Rights Department, Oxford University Press, at the
address above
You must not circulate this work in any other form
and you must impose this same condition on any acquirer
Published in the United States of America by Oxford University Press
198 Madison Avenue, New York, NY 10016, United States of America
British Library Cataloguing in Publication Data
Data available
Library of Congress Control Number: 2023935108
ISBN 9780192867421
ISBN 9780192867438 (pbk.)
DOI: 10.1093/oso/9780192867421.001.0001
Printed and bound by
CPI Group (UK) Ltd, Croydon, CR0 4YY
Links to third party websites are provided by Oxford in good faith and
for information only. Oxford disclaims any responsibility for the materials
contained in any third party website referenced in this work.
A Maura, Sara, Ilaria e Lorenzo
Preface
This book evolved from the notes of a course that I teach at the Uni-
versity of Geneva, for undergraduate physics students. For many gen-
erations of physicists, including mine, the classic references for classical
electrodynamics have been the textbook by Jackson and that by Lan-
dau and Lifschits.1 The former is still much used, although more modern 1
In the text we will refer to the latest
and excellent textbooks with a somewhat similar structure, such as Garg editions of these books, Jackson (1998)
and Landau and Lifschits (1975). How-
(2012) or Zangwill (2013), now exist, while the latter is by now rarely ever, these books went through many
used, even as an auxiliary reference text for a course. Because of my editions: the first edition of Jackson ap-
field-theoretical background, as my notes were growing I realized that peared in 1962, while that of Landau
they were naturally drifting toward what looked to me as a modern ver- and Lifschits even dates back to 1939.
sion of Landau and Lifschits, and this stimulated me to expand them
further into a book.
While this book is meant as a modern introduction to classical elec-
trodynamics, it is by no means intended as a first introduction to the
subject. The reader is assumed to have already had a first course on
electrodynamics, at a level covered for instance by Griffiths (2017). This
also implies a different structure of the presentation. In a first course
of electrodynamics, it is natural to take a ‘bottom-up’ approach, where
one starts from experimental observations in the simple settings of elec-
trostatics and magnetostatics, and then moves toward time-dependent
phenomena and electromagnetic induction, which eventually leads to
generalizing the equations governing electrostatics and magnetostatics
into the synthesis provided by the full Maxwell’s equation. This ap-
proach is the natural one for a first introduction because, first of all,
gives the correct historical perspective and shows how Maxwell’s equa-
tions emerged from the unification of a large body of observations; fur-
thermore, it also allows one to start with more elementary mathematical
tools, for the benefit of the student that meets some of them for the first
time, while at the same time discovering all these new and fundamental
physics concepts. The price that is paid is that the approach, following
the historical developments, is sometimes heuristic, and the logic of the
arguments and derivations is not always tight.
For this more advanced text, I have chosen instead a ‘top-down’ ap-
proach. Maxwell’s equations are introduced immediately (after an intro-
ductory chapter on mathematical tools) as the ‘definition’ of the theory,
and their consequences are then systematically developed. This has the
advantage of a better logical clarity. It will also allow us to always go
into the ‘real story’, rather than presenting at first a simpler version, to
be later improved.
viii Preface
of charge, and therefore of current, is derived from the three basic units
of length, mass and time.
The SI system is the natural one for applications to the macroscopic
world: currents are measured in amperes, voltages in volts, and so on.
This makes the SI system the obvious choice for laboratory applications
and in electrical engineering, and SI units are by now the almost uni-
versal standard for electrodynamics courses at the undergraduate level. 4
Actually, its real virtues appear
The Gaussian system, on the other hand, has advantages in other con- when combining electromagnetism with
texts, and in particular leads to neater formulas when relativistic effects quantum mechanics. In this case, the
are important.4 reduction from four to three base units
This state of affairs has led to a rather peculiar situation. In general, obtained with the Gaussian system can
be pushed further, using a system of
undergraduate textbooks of classical electromagnetism always use SI units where one also sets ~ = c = 1,
units; in contrast, more advanced textbooks of classical electrodynamics with the result that one remains with a
are often split between SI and Gaussian units, and all textbooks on single base unit, typically taken to be
quantum electrodynamics and quantum field theory use Gaussian units. the mass unit. In quantum field the-
ory this system is so convenient that
The difficulty of the choice is exemplified by the Jackson’s textbook, units ~ = c = 1 are called natural units
that has been the ‘bible’ of classical electrodynamics for generations of (we will briefly mention them in Sec-
physicists. The second edition (1975), as the first, used Gaussian units tion 2.2). As a consequence, all general-
throughout. However, the third edition (1998) switched to SI units for izations from classical electrodynamics
to quantum electrodynamics (and its
the first 10 chapters, in recognition of the fact that almost all other extensions such as the Standard Model
undergraduate level textbooks used SI units; then, from Chapter 11 of electroweak and strong interactions)
(Special Theory of Relativity) on, it goes back to Gaussian units, in are nowadays uniquely discussed using
the Gaussian system (or, rather, a vari-
recognition of the fact that they are more appropriate than SI units
ant of it, Heaviside–Lorentz or rational-
for relativistic phenomena.5 Gaussian units are also the most common ized Gaussian units, differing just by
choice in quantum mechanics textbooks: when computing the energy the placing of some 4π factors, that we
level of the hydrogen atom, almost all textbooks use a Coulomb potential will also introduce in Chapter 2), sup-
plemented by units ~ = c = 1.
in Gaussian units, −e2 /r, rather than the SI expression −e2 /(4π0 r).6
5
In this book we will use SI units, since this is nowadays the almost Among the other ‘old-time’ classics,
universal standard for an undergraduate textbook on classical electrody- Landau and Lifschits (1975) used Gaus-
sian units, while the Feynman Lectures
namics. However, it is important to be familiar also with the Gaussian on Physics, Feynman et al. (1964), used
system, as a bridge toward graduate and more specialized courses. This SI. The first two editions of the clas-
is particularly important for the student that wishes to go into theo- sic textbook by Purcell used Gaussian
units, but switched to SI for the 3rd edi-
retical high-energy physics where, eventually, only the Gaussian system
tion, Purcell and Morin (2013). Among
will be used. We will then discuss in Section 2.2 how to quickly trans- more recent books, SI is used in Grif-
late from SI to Gaussian units, and, in Appendix A, we will provide an fiths (2017), Zangwill (2013) and Tong
explicit translation in Gaussian units of the most important results and (2015), while Gaussian units are used in
Garg (2012) (with frequent translations
formulas of the main text. to SI units).
6
The most notable exception is the
Finally, I wish to thank Enis Belgacem, Francesco Iacovelli and Michele quantum mechanics textbook Griffiths
Mancarella, who gave the exercise sessions of the course for various years, (2004), that uses SI units, consistently
and Stefano Foffa for useful discussions. I thank again Francesco Iacovelli with the classical electrodynamics book
by the same author.
for producing a very large number of figures of the book. I am grateful
to Stephen Blundell for extremely useful comments on the manuscript.
Last but not least, as with my previous books with OUP, I wish to thank
Sonke Adlung, for his friendly and always very useful advice, as well as
all the staff at OUP.
1 Mathematical tools 1
1.1 Vector algebra 1
1.2 Differential operators on scalar and vector fields 3
1.3 Integration of vector fields. Gauss’s and Stokes’s theorems 5
1.4 Dirac delta 7
1.5 Fourier transform 13
1.6 Tensors and rotations 16
1.7 Groups and representations 18
1.7.1 Reducible and irreducible representations 20
1.7.2 The rotation group and its irreducible tensor rep-
resentations 22
2 Systems of units 27
2.1 The SI system 27
2.2 Gaussian units 31
2.3 SI or Gaussian? 36
3 Maxwell’s equations 39
3.1 Maxwell’s equations in vector form 39
3.1.1 Local form of Maxwell’s equations 39
3.1.2 Integrated form of Maxwell’s equations 42
3.2 Conservation laws 43
3.2.1 Conservation of the electric charge 43
3.2.2 Energy, momentum, and angular momentum of
the electromagnetic field 45
3.3 Gauge potentials and gauge invariance 52
3.4 Symmetries of Maxwell’s equations 55
5 Electromagnetic energy 99
5.1 Work and energy in electrostatics 99
5.2 Energy stored in a static electric field 101
5.2.1 Continuous charge distribution 101
5.2.2 The point-like limit and particle self-energies 104
5.2.3 Energy of charges in an external electric field 107
5.2.4 Energy of a system of conductors 108
5.3 Work and energy in magnetostatics 109
5.4 Energy stored in a static magnetic field 111
5.5 Forces and mechanical potentials 114
5.5.1 Mechanical potentials for conductors 118
5.5.2 Mechanical potentials in magnetostatics 124
5.6 Solved problems 128
References 431
Index 433
Mathematical tools
1
Classical electrodynamics requires a good familiarity with a set of math-
ematical tools, which will then find applications basically everywhere in 1.1 Vector algebra 1
physics. We find it convenient to begin by recalling some of these con- 1.2 Differential operators on
scalar and vector fields 3
cepts so that, later, the understanding of the physics will not be obscured
1.3 Integration of vector fields.
by the mathematical manipulations. We will focus here on tools that will Gauss’s and Stokes’s
be of more immediate use. Further mathematical tools will be discussed theorems 5
along the way, in the rest of the book, as they will be needed. 1.4 Dirac delta 7
1.5 Fourier transform 13
1.6 Tensors and rotations 16
1.1 Vector algebra
1.7 Groups and representations
18
A vector a has Cartesian components ai . We use the convention that
repeated indices are summed over, so,
X
a·b = ai bi ≡ ai bi , (1.1)
i
With the convention of the sum over repeated indices, the right-hand
side becomes ai bi cj dj . Notice that it was important here to use two
different letters, i, j, for the dummy indices involved.
2 Mathematical tools
where ijk is the totally antisymmetric tensor (or the Levi–Civita ten-
sor), defined by 123 = +1, together with the condition that it is an-
tisymmetric under any exchange of indices. Therefore ijk = 0 if two
indices have the same value and, e.g., 213 = −123 = −1. This also
implies that the tensor is cyclic, ijk = −jik = jki , i.e., it is unchanged
under a cyclic permutation of the indices. Note that a × b = −b × a.
We will see in Section 1.6 that the tensors δij and ijk play a special role
in the theory of representations of the rotation group. Unit vectors are
denoted by a hat; for instance, x̂, ŷ, and ẑ are the unit vectors along
the x, y and z axes, respectively. Note that, e.g.,
x̂ × ŷ = ẑ . (1.6)
(Prove it!) Note the structure of the indices: on the left, the index i is
summed over, so it does not appear on the right-hand side. It is a dummy
index, and we could have used a different name for it. For instance, the
left-hand side of eq. (1.7) could be written as pjk plm , with a different
letter p. In contrast, the indices j, k, l, m are free indices so, if they
appear on the left-hand side, they must also appear on the right-hand
side. Note also that, because of the cyclic property of the epsilon tensor,
the left-hand side of eq. (1.7) can also be written as jki ilm .
∇·(∇ × v) = ∂i (ijk ∂j vk )
= ijk ∂i ∂j vk
= 0. (1.18)
4 Mathematical tools
For future reference, we give the expression of the gradient and Lapla-
cian of a scalar field, and of the divergence and curl of a vector field,
in Cartesian coordinates (x, y, x), in polar coordinates (r, θ, φ), and in
1
Our convention on the polar angles is cylindrical coordinates (ρ, ϕ, z).1,2 Denoting by {x̂, ŷ, ẑ}, {r̂, θ̂, φ̂}, and
such that spherical coordinates are re- {ρ̂, ϕ̂, ẑ}, respectively, the unit vectors in the corresponding directions,
lated to Cartesian coordinates by x =
r sin θ cos φ, y = r sin θ sin φ, z =
we have
r cos θ, with θ ∈ [0, π] and φ ∈ [0, 2π]. ∇f = (∂x f )x̂ + (∂y f )ŷ + (∂z f )ẑ (1.22)
Cylindrical coordinates are related to
Cartesian coordinates by x = ρ cos ϕ, 1 1
= (∂r f )r̂ + (∂θ f )θ̂ + (∂φ f )φ̂ (1.23)
y = ρ sin ϕ (with ϕ ∈ [0, 2π]) and z = z. r r sin θ
Then, as ϕ increases, we rotate coun- 1
terclockwise with respect to the z axis. = (∂ρ f )ρ̂ + (∂ϕ f )ϕ̂ + (∂z f )ẑ , (1.24)
This means that ρ̂×ϕ̂ = +ẑ.
ρ
2
The Laplacian of a vector field has ∇2 f = ∂x2 f + ∂y2 f + ∂z2 f (1.25)
been defined from eq. (1.20) in terms of
the Cartesian coordinates and, in this 1 1 1
case, on each component of the vec-
= 2
∂r (r2 ∂r f ) + 2 ∂θ (sin θ∂θ f ) + 2 2 ∂φ2 f (1.26)
r r sin θ r sin θ
tor field, it has the same form as the 1 1 2 2
Laplacian acting on a scalar. This is no = ∂ρ (ρ∂ρ f ) + 2 ∂ϕ f + ∂z f , (1.27)
longer true in polar of cylindrical coor- ρ ρ
dinates. In that case, ∇2 v can be more
easily obtained from eq. (1.21), using ∇·v = ∂x vx + ∂y vy + ∂z vz (1.28)
the corresponding expressions of ∇·v
1 1 1
and ∇ × v. = 2
∂r (r2 vr ) + ∂θ (vθ sin θ) + ∂ φ vφ (1.29)
r r sin θ r sin θ
1 1
= ∂ρ (ρvρ ) + ∂ϕ vϕ + ∂z vz , (1.30)
ρ ρ
and therefore
I Z Z
ijk d`i uj = dsi ∂k ui − dsk ∂i ui . (1.44)
C S S
where A is the area of the surface and n̂ is the unit vector normal to
it. We therefore obtain an elegant formula for the area A of a planar
surface S, bounded by a curve C,
I
1
An̂ = x×d` . (1.47)
2 C
1.4 Dirac delta 7
We will make use very often of both Gauss’s and Stokes’s theorems.4 4
Proceeding as for Stokes’s theorem, if
A vector field such that ∇ × v = 0 everywhere is called irrotational, we set v(x) = ψ(x)w, with w constant,
we also get the useful identity
or curl-free. We have seen in eq. (1.19) that, if v is the gradient of a Z Z
function, v = ∇f , then it is irrotational. A sort of converse of this d3 x ∇ψ = ds ψ , (1.49)
V S
statement holds:
while, setting v(x) = u(x)×w, we get
Z Z
Theorem for curl-free fields. Let v be a vector field such that d3 x ∇×u = ds ×u . (1.50)
∇ × v = 0 everywhere in a region V simply connected (i.e., such that V S
δ(x − x0 ) = 0 if x 6= x0 , (1.51)
and that, for any function f (x) regular in an integration region I that
includes x0 , Z
dx δ(x − x0 )f (x) = f (x0 ) . (1.52)
I
Note that the integral on the left-hand side vanishes if I does not include
x0 because of eq. (1.51) [and of the assumed regularity of f (x)]. On the
other hand, again because of eq. (1.51), the integral in the left-hand side
of eq. (1.52) is independent of I, as long as x0 ∈ I. In the following we
will set for definiteness I = (−∞, +∞), so eq. (1.52) reads
Z +∞
dx δ(x − x0 )f (x) = f (x0 ) . (1.53)
−∞
8 Mathematical tools
Observe that, applying this definition to the case of the function f (x) =
1, we get the normalization condition
Z +∞
dx δ(x) = 1 . (1.54)
−∞
Since the Dirac delta vanishes at all points x 6= x0 , but still the integral
in the left-hand side of eq. (1.53) is non-zero, it must be singular in x0 .
Actually, the Dirac delta is not a proper function, but can be defined
by considering a sequence of functions δn (x, x0 ) such that, as n → ∞,
δn (x, x0 ) → 0 for x 6= x0 , and δn (x, x0 ) → +∞ for x = x0 , while
maintaining the normalization condition (1.54). As an example, one can
take a sequence of gaussians centered on x0 , with smaller and smaller
width,
1 2 2
δn (x − x0 ) = √ e−(x−x0 ) /(2σn ) , (1.55)
2π σn
with σn = 1/n. Another option could be to use
n for |x − x0 | < 1/(2n)
δn (x − x0 ) = (1.56)
0 for |x − x0 | > 1/(2n) .
These two sequences of functions are shown in Fig. 1.1. In both cases,
δn (x)
the limit of δn (x − x0 ) for n → ∞ does not exists, since it diverges when
x = x0 , and therefore does not define a proper function δ(x). However,
n → ∞ =⇒ σn → 0
Z +∞ Z x0 + 2n1
1 1
= lim n x0 + − x0 − f (x0 )
n→∞ 2n 2n
= f (x0 ) . (1.57)
xδ(x) = 0 . (1.62)
Another useful notion is the derivative of the Dirac delta, δ 0 (x), which,
in the sense of distributions, is defined from
Z +∞ Z +∞
dx δ 0 (x − x0 )f (x) ≡ − dx δ(x − x0 )f 0 (x)
−∞ −∞
= −f 0 (x0 ) . (1.63)
2
−∞
√ of eq. (1.68).6 This result could have also been proved using a sequence
− k2 2π δn (x) of approximations to the Dirac delta, and showing that, plugging it
=e 2n , (1.72)
n
on the left hand side of eq. (1.68), we get a continuous and differentiable
where we introduced x0 = x + ik/n2 . approximation to the theta function.
More precisely, we have actually con-
sidered a closed contour in the complex The Dirac delta has an extremely useful integral representation. A
plane z = x + iy, composed by the x simple way to obtain it is to use the sequence of gaussians (1.55). Then,
axis y = 0, and by the parallel line Z +∞ Z +∞
y = ik/n2 , and closed the contour join- n 1 2 2
Z +∞
dk − k22 +ikx n 1 2 2
e 2n = √ e− 2 n x
−∞ 2π 2π
= δn (x) . (1.73)
However, we have stressed that this only holds for r 6= 0, since these
manipulations become undefined at r = 0. To understand the behavior
of ∇·v in r = 0, we use Gauss’s theorem (1.48) in a volume V given by
a spherical ball of radius R. Its boundary is the sphere S 2 , and on the
boundary v = r̂/R2 , while ds = R2 dΩ r̂, where dΩ is the infinitesimal
9
Recall that the infinitesimal solid an- solid angle.9 Then,
gle dΩ is defined from the transforma- Z Z
tion from Cartesian to spherical coor-
dinates. In two dimensions, from x = d3 x ∇·v = ds · v
V 2
r cos θ and y = r sin θ, it follows that ZS
dxdy = rdrdθ. Similarly, in three di- r̂
= R2 dΩ r̂ · 2
mensions, the relation between Carte- 2 R
sian and spherical coordinates (as we ZS
already mentioned in Note 1 on page 4) = dΩ
is x = r sin θ cos φ, y = r sin θ sin φ, z = S2
r cos θ, with θ ∈ [0, π] and φ ∈ [0, 2π]. = 4π . (1.86)
Computing the Jacobian of the trans-
formation,
This shows that ∇·v cannot be zero everywhere. Rather, since ∇·v = 0
dxdydz = r2 sin θdrdθdφ for r 6= 0, but still its integral in d3 x over any volume V is equal to 4π,
= r2 drdΩ , (1.82) we must have
where
r̂
dΩ = sin θdθdφ . (1.83) ∇· = 4π δ (3) (x) . (1.87)
r2
Then, the total integral over the solid
angle is
Z Z π Z 2π From this, we can obtain another very useful result. Using the expression
dΩ = dθ sin θ dφ (1.23) of the gradient in polar coordinates, we get
0 0
= 4π , (1.84)
1 r̂
so the total solid angle in three dimen-
∇ =− 2. (1.88)
r r
sions is 4π. Observe that we can also
write dΩ = d cos θ dφ, reabsorbing the Writing
minus sign from d cos θ = − sin θdθ into
a change of the integration limits, so
1 1
that ∇2 = ∇· ∇
Z 1 Z 2π r r
Z
dΩ = d cos θ dφ . (1.85) r̂
−1 0 = −∇· , (1.89)
r2
1
∇2 = −4πδ (3) (x − x0 ) . (1.91)
|x − x0 |
We will use this result in Section 4.1.2, when we will introduce the notion
of Green’s function of the Laplacian.
1.5 Fourier transform 13
If f (x) is real, f˜∗ (k) = f˜(−k). The convolution theorem now tells us
that, if Z
F (x) = d3 x0 f (x0 )g(x − x0 ) , (1.101)
then
F̃ (k) = f˜(k)g̃(k) . (1.102)
For a function of time f (t) we will denote the integration variable that
enters in the Fourier transform by ω, and we will also use a different
sign convention, defining the Fourier transform f˜(ω) as
Z
˜
f (ω) = dt f (t)eiωt , (1.103)
so that Z
dω ˜
f (t) = f (ω)e−iωt . (1.104)
2π
In the context of Special Relativity, the advantage of using a different
sign convention between the spatial and temporal Fourier transforms is
that the Fourier transform of a function f (t, x), with respect to both t
and x, can be written as
Z
dωd3 k ˜
f (t, x) = f (ω, k)e−i(ωt−k·x) , (1.105)
(2π)4
i.e., Z
f˜(ω, k) = dtd3 x f (t, x)ei(ωt−k·x) , (1.106)
and, as we will see, the combination (ωt − k·x) is more natural from the
point of view of Special Relativity and Lorentz invariance.
Example 1.2 In this example, we compute the three-dimensional Fourier
transform of the function
1
f (r) = , (1.107)
r
that appears in the Coulomb potential. A direct computation leads to
14
Indeed, this function does not belong a problem of convergence.14 Indeed, from eqs. (1.99), (1.82), and (1.85),
to L1 (R3 ), compare with Note 10 on Z
page 13. 1
f˜(k) = d3 x e−ik·x
r
Z ∞ Z 2π Z 1
1
= dr r2 dφ d cos θ e−ikr cos θ , (1.108)
0 0 −1 r
where, to perform the integral, we have written d3 x in polar coordinates
with k as polar axis, so θ is the angle between k and x. The integral over
dφ just gives a 2π factor, and the integral over cos θ is also elementary,
Z 1
2
dα e−ikrα = sin(kr) , (1.109)
−1 kr
so we get Z ∞
4π
f˜(k) = 2 du sin u , (1.110)
k 0
1.5 Fourier transform 15
where k = |k| and u = kr. The integral over du, however, does not
converge at u = ∞, and is not well defined without a prescription. We
then start by computing first the Fourier transform of the function
e−µr
V (r) = , (1.111)
r
where µ > 0, and has the dimensions of the inverse of a length. This
function, which corresponds to an interaction potential known as the
Yukawa potential, reduces to the Coulomb potential as µ → 0+ . Per-
forming the same passages as before gives
Z
4π ∞
Ṽ (k) = 2 du sin u e−u , (1.112)
k 0
where = µ/k. For non-zero , i.e., non-zero µ, the factor e−u ensures 15
A note for the advanced reader. In
the convergence of the integral. Writing sin u = (eiu − e−iu )/(2i), the quantum field theory, the Coulomb
integral is elementary, potential is understood as the in-
teraction between two static charges
∞ mediated by the exchange of a massless
4π 1 1 (i−)u 1 −(i+)u
Ṽ (k) = e + e particle, the photon. The exchange of
k 2 2i i − i+ 0 a massive particle produces instead a
4π 1 Yukawa potential, with the constant
= µ related to the mass m of the ex-
k 2 1 + 2 changed particle by µ = mc/~, see
4π e.g., Section 6.6 of Maggiore (2005).
= . (1.113)
k + µ2
2 This way of regularizing the integral
therefore corresponds, physically, to
Therefore, assigning a small mass mγ to the
e−µr 4π photon and then taking the limit
V (x) = ⇐⇒ Ṽ (k) = . (1.114) mγ → 0. Indeed, one way to put limits
r k 2 + µ2
on the photon mass is to assume that
Since the limit µ → 0+ of these expressions is well defined, we can now the Coulomb interaction is replaced
define the Fourier transform of the Coulomb potential as the limit for by a Yukawa potential, and obtain
limits on mγ . Currently, the strongest
µ → 0+ of the Fourier transform of the Yukawa potential,15 so limit on the photon mass coming
from a direct test of the Coulomb law
1 4π gives mγ c2 < 1 × 10−14 eV. Writing
f (x) = ⇐⇒ f˜(k) = 2 . (1.115)
r k µ = 1/r0 , so that r0 = ~/(mγ c), this
translate into a limit r0 > 2 × 107 m,
i.e., there is no sign of an exponential
The correctness of this limiting procedure can be checked observing that, decay corresponding to a Yukawa po-
if we rather start from f˜(k) = 4π/k 2 and compute the inverse Fourier tential up to such scales. Other limits
transform, we get 1/r without the need of regulating any divergence. on the mass of the photon, not based on
a direct measurement of the Coulomb
Indeed, in this case we get
law, are even stronger, with the most
Z stringent being mγ c2 < 1 × 10−18 eV,
d3 k 4π ik·x
f (r) = e corresponding to r0 > 2 × 1011 m, see
(2π)3 k 2 https://pdg.lbl.gov/2021/listings/
Z ∞ Z 1 contents_listings.html. Another
4π 2 1
= 2π k dk d cos θ 2 eikr cos θ way to search for deviations from
8π 3 −1 k Coulomb’s law is to look for a force
Z ∞0 proportional to 1/r2+ , and set limits
1 2 sin u
= du on . This is a purely phenomenolog-
r π 0 u ical parametrization and, contrary to
1 the case of the Yukawa potential (and
= , (1.116) to statements in some textbook), it
r
R∞ has no field-theoretical interpretation
since 0 du (sin u)/u converges, and has the value π/2. in terms of a photon mass.
16 Mathematical tools
We now use this relation to define rotations and vectors, in any dimen-
sions, as follows. We consider a set of d objects vi , i = 1, . . . , d, and
a linear transformation of the form (1.120), where now Rij is a d × d
matrix. We define rotations in d dimensions as the transformations Rij 18
We will qualify this more precisely
that preserve the norm of v,18 so that eq. (1.121) (with i = 1, . . . , d) at the end of this section and in
holds. The set of objects vi that transforms as in eq. (1.120) when Rij Section 1.7, where we will see that
is a rotation matrix are then called “vectors under rotations” or, more “proper” rotations are obtained factor-
simply, vectors. ing out some discrete parity symmetry.
This definition allows us to characterize rotations as follows. Plugging
eq. (1.120) into eq. (1.121) we get
Using eq. (1.3) and renaming the dummy indices on the right-hand side
as i → k, j → i, k → j, this can be rewritten in the form
Recall that, if Rij are the matrix elements of the matrix R, the transpose
matrix RT has matrix elements (RT )ij = Rji . Then eq. (1.129) reads
T
Rik Rkj = δij or, in matrix form
RT R = I , (1.125)
RRT = RT R = I , (1.128)
or, in components,
Rki Rkj = Rik Rjk = δij . (1.129)
Equation (1.128) is just the definition of orthogonal matrices. We have
then found that rotations in d dimensions are given by d × d orthogonal
matrices, and vectors are defined by the transformation property (1.120)
under rotations.
The transformation property of vectors can be generalized to objects
with different transformation properties. In particular, in any dimension
18 Mathematical tools
d we can define a tensor Tij with two indices as an object that, under
rotations, transforms as
(with the indices running over two values {x, y} in two dimensions, over
{x, y, z} in three dimensions, and more generally over d values 1, . . . , d
in d dimensions), with the same matrix Rij that appears in the transfor-
mation of vectors. Similarly, a tensor Tijk with three indices is defined
as an object that, under rotations, transforms as
0
Tijk = Rii0 Rjj 0 Rkk0 Ti0 j 0 k0 , (1.131)
and so on. Note that, for tensors, the connection with the notion of arrow
is completely lost, and a tensor is only defined by its transformation
property (1.130).
Consider now a tensor Tij that, in a given reference frame, has compo-
nents δij . Normally, the numerical values of the components of a tensor
change if we perform a rotation, according to eq. (1.130). In this case,
however, in the new frame
where in the last equality we have used eq. (1.129). Thus, δij is a very
special tensor, whose components have the same numerical values in
all frames. It is then called an invariant tensor. In three dimensions,
the only other invariant tensor of the rotation group is ijk , since it
transforms as
ijk → Rii0 Rjj 0 Rkk0 i0 j 0 k0 . (1.133)
However, from the definition of the determinant of a 3 × 3 matrix, we
can check that the right-hand side of eq. (1.133) is equal to (det R)ijk .
Equation (1.128), together with the fact that, for two matrices A and
B, det(AB) = det(A) det(B), and det(RT ) = det(R), implies that
(det R)2 = 1, so det R = ±1. “Proper” rotations are defined as the trans-
formations with det R = +1 (while transformations with det R = −1
correspond to parity transformations, that change the orientation of one
axis, or of all three axes, possibly combined with proper rotations), so
ijk is indeed invariant under (proper) rotations.
g 7→ DR (g) , (1.134)
This condition means that the mapping preserves the group structure,
i.e., that it is the same to compose the elements at the group level (with
the ◦ operation) and then represent the resulting element g1 ◦ g2 , or
first represent g1 and g2 in terms of linear operators and then com-
pose the resulting linear operators. Note that the composition oper-
ation in DR (g1 )DR (g2 ) is the one between linear operators (such as
the matrix product when the linear operators are matrices, see next),
while the composition operation in g1 ◦ g2 is the one at the abstract
group level. Setting g1 = g, g2 = e in eq. (1.135), we find that, for all
g ∈ G, DR (g)DR (e) = DR (g); similarly, setting g1 = e, g2 = g, we get
DR (e)DR (g) = DR (g). This implies that the identity element of the
group e must be mapped to the identity operator I, i.e., DR (e) = I.
Similarly, we can show that DR (g −1 ) = [DR (g)]−1 .
The vector space on which the operators DR act is called the basis,
or the base space, for the representation R and, as we have mentioned,
it can be a real vector space or a complex vector space. We will be
particularly interested in matrix representations. In this case, the base
space is a vector space of finite (real or complex) dimension n, and an
abstract group element g is represented by a n × n matrix [DR (g)]ij ,
with i, j = 1, . . . , n. The dimension of the representation is defined as
the dimension n of the base space.
Writing a generic element of the base space as a vector v with com-
ponents (v1 , . . . , vn ), a group element g can be associated with a linear
operator [DR (g)]ij acting on the base space, and therefore to a linear
transformation of the base space
vi → [DR (g)]ij vj , (1.136)
with our usual summation convention on repeated indices. The impor-
tant point is that eq. (1.136) allows us to attach a physical meaning
to a group element: before introducing the concept of representation,
a group element g is just an abstract mathematical object defined by
its composition rules with the other group members. Choosing a spe-
cific representation, instead, allows us to interpret g as a transformation
22
Apart from matrix representations, acting on a vector space.22
the other typical situation encoun-
tered in physics is when a group el-
ement is represented by a differential 1.7.1 Reducible and irreducible representations
operator acting on a space of func-
tions. Since the space of function The different representations of a group describe all possible ways in
is infinite-dimensional, this representa- which objects can transform under the action of the group, for instance
tion is infinite-dimensional. under rotations. However, not all possible representations describe gen-
uinely different possibilities. Given a representation R of a group G,
whose basis is a space X, and another representation R0 of G, whose
basis is a space X 0 , R and R0 are called equivalent if there is an isomor-
phism S : X → X 0 such that, for all g ∈ G,
DR (g) = S −1 DR0 (g)S . (1.137)
Comparing with eq. (1.136), we see that, in the case of representations
of finite dimension, equivalent representations correspond to a change
1.7 Groups and representations 21
wx wx0 cos θ − sin θ wx
→ = , (1.138)
wy wy0 sin θ cos θ wy
which expresses the fact that, in two dimensions, vectors are represen-
tations of dimension two of the rotation group. Naively, we might think
that we can find a new type of representation of dimension four, by
putting together the components of v and w into a single object with
components (vx , vy , wx , wy ). Under rotations,
0
vx vx cos θ − sin θ 0 0 vx
vy vy0 sin θ cos θ 0 0 vy
= .
wx → wx0 0 0 cos θ − sin θ wx
wy wy0 0 0 sin θ cos θ wy
(1.139)
However, here we have not discovered a genuinely new type of repre-
sentation of dimension four; we have simply stack together two vectors.
Mathematically, the fact that this is not a genuinely new representation
is revealed by the fact that the matrix in eq. (1.139) is block diagonal
(for all rotations, so in this case for all values of θ), so that there is no
rotation that mixes the components of v with that of w.
This example motivates the definition of reducible and irreducible rep-
resentations. A representation R is called reducible if it has an invariant
subspace, i.e., if the action of any DR (g) on the vectors in the subspace
gives another vector of the subspace. This corresponds to the fact that
[possibly after a suitable change of basis of the form (1.137)] there is
a subset of components of the basis vector that never mixes with the
others, for all transformations DR (g). A representation R is called com-
pletely reducible if, for all elements g, the matrices DR (g) have a block
diagonal form, or can be put in a block diagonal form with a change
of basis corresponding to the equivalence relation (1.137). Conversely,
a representation with no invariant subspace is called irreducible. Ir-
reducible representations describe the genuinely different way in which
physical quantities can transform under the group of transformations in
questions.
To put some flesh into these rather abstract notions, we now look at
the simplest irreducible representations of the rotation group.
22 Mathematical tools
where, to get the second equality, we used the symmetry of Skl and, in
the third, we renamed the dummy indices k → l and l → k. Similarly, an
antisymmetric tensor remains antisymmetric. Therefore, Sij and Aij do
not mix under rotations. Consider now the trace of the symmetric part,
S = δij S ij . Using eq. (1.130) and the property (1.129) of orthogonal
matrices, we see that it is invariant under spatial rotations. It is then
convenient to separate Sij as
1 1
Sij = Sij − δij S + δij S
3 3
T 1
≡ Sij + δij S . (1.144)
3
24 Mathematical tools
T
The term Sij is traceless (as can be shown contracting it with δij and
24
We are working for simplicity in three using δij δij = δii = 3).24 Since the trace is invariant, under rotations
dimensions. In d dimensions, the trace- it remains traceless, and therefore it does not mix with the term δij S.
less combination is Sij − (1/d)δij S.
We have therefore separated the nine components of a generic tensor
T
Tij into its symmetric traceless part Sij (which has five components,
corresponding to the six independent components of a symmetric 3 × 3
matrix, minus the condition of zero trace), its trace S (one component),
and an antisymmetric tensor Aij which, in three dimensions, has three
independent components,
T 1
Tij = Sij + δij S + Aij . (1.145)
3
The trace S = δ ij Tij , being invariant under rotations, corresponds to the
scalar representation that we already encountered. The antisymmetric
tensor might look like a new representation of the rotation group, but
in fact, introducing
1
Ai = ijk Ajk , (1.146)
2
one sees that Ai is just a spatial vector. We have inserted a factor of
1/2 for convenience since, for instance, in this way A1 = (1/2)1jk Ajk =
(1/2)(123 A23 + 132 A32 ) = A23 [using the antisymmetry of ijk and
of Ajk with respect to (j, k)]. So, A23 = A1 , and similarly one finds
A12 = A3 , A31 = A2 , so the inversion of eq. (1.146) can be written
compactly as
Aij = ijk Ak . (1.147)
Therefore, the three independent components of an antisymmetric tensor
can be rearranged into the three independent components of a vector.
This means that these two representations are equivalent, in the sense
of eq. (1.137), and we have not discovered a genuinely new irreducible
representation of rotations.
In contrast, the traceless symmetric tensor is irreducible (since there
is no further symmetry that forbids its components to mix among them,
T
and then we can always find rotations that mix a given components of Sij
with any other component). We have therefore found a new irreducible
representation of the rotation group, of dimension five, the traceless
symmetric tensors, and eq. (1.145) can be rewritten as
T 1
Tij = Sij + δij S + ijk Ak , (1.148)
3
in terms of the invariant tensors δij and ijk , and of the irreducible
representations provided by the scalar S, the vector Ai , and the traceless
T
symmetric tensor Sij . Note how the nine independent components of
Tij have been shared between a scalar (one component), a vector (three
components), and a traceless symmetric tensor (five components). One
can work out similarly the decomposition into irreducible representations
of tensors with more indices, such as Tijk .
Observe that the dimension of the scalar, vector, and traceless sym-
metric tensor representations can all be written as 2s + 1 for s = 0
1.7 Groups and representations 25
with ωij infinitesimal parameters, which describe the deviation from the
identity transformation. Requiring that this satisfies eq. (1.129), to first
order in ω we get
δij = δik + ωik + O(ω 2 ) δjk + ωjk + O(ω 2 )
= δij + ωij + ωji + O(ω 2 ) , (1.150)
xi → xi + ω ij xj
= xi − ijk xj δθk . (1.153)
“This was the way of it. I was living in a little cottage that belonged
to my uncle, and that he let me have rent free on condition that I
should take care of it and keep the grounds in an attractive state until
he could sell it. I had an old negro housekeeper and two cats. One of
them, Martha Washington by name, was young and handsome, and
about as bright a cat as I ever knew. She had a strong sense of
humor, too, which is unusual with cats, and when something amused
her she would throw back her head and open her mouth wide, and
laugh a silent laugh that was as hearty and rollicking as a Methodist
parson’s laugh when he hears a gray-haired joke at a negro minstrel
show. Martha was perhaps the most popular cat in the town, and
there was scarcely a minute in the day when there wasn’t some one
of her admirers in the back yard. As for serenades, she had three or
four every night that it didn’t rain. There was a quartette club formed
by four first-class feline voices, and the club used to give Martha and
me two or three hours of music three times a week. I used
sometimes to find as many as six or seven old boots in the back yard
of a morning that had been contributed by enthusiastic neighbors. As
for society, Martha Washington was at the top of the heap. There
wasn’t a more fashionable cat in the whole State of Ohio—I was
living in Ohio at the time—and in spite of it all she was as simple and
unaffected in her ways as if she had been born and bred in a Quaker
meeting-house.
“One afternoon Martha was giving a four-o’clock milk on the
veranda next to my room. I always gave her permission to give that
sort of entertainment whenever she wanted to, for the gossip of her
friends used to be very amusing to me. Among the guests that
afternoon was Susan’s Maltese cat. Susan was the young lady I
wanted to marry. Now, this cat had always pretended to be very fond
of me, and Susan often said that her cat never made a mistake in
reading character, and that the cat’s approval of me was equivalent
to a first-class Sunday-school certificate of moral character. I didn’t
care anything about the cat myself, for somehow I didn’t place any
confidence in her professions. There was an expression about her
tail which, to my mind, meant that she was insincere and
treacherous. The Maltese cat had finished her milk, when the
conversation drifted around to the various mistresses of the cats,
and presently some one spoke of Susan. Then the Maltese began to
say things about Susan that made my blood boil. It was not only
what she said, but what she insinuated, and according to her Susan
was one of the meanest and most contemptible women in the whole
United States. I stood it as long as I could, and then I got up and said
to Martha Washington, ‘I think your Maltese friend is needed at her
home, and the sooner she goes the better if she doesn’t want to be
helped home with a club.’ That was enough. The Maltese, who was
doing up her back fur when I spoke, stopped, looked at me as if she
could tear me into pieces, and then flounced out of the house without
saying a word. I understood that there was an end to her pretence of
friendship for me, and that henceforth I should have an enemy in
Susan’s house who might, perhaps, be able to do me a good deal of
harm.
“POOR PUSSY’S NERVES ARE THOROUGHLY UPSET.”
“The next time I called to see Susan the Maltese was in the room,
and she instantly put up her back and tail and swore at me as if I
was a Chinaman on the lookout for material for a stolen dinner.
‘What can be the matter with poor pussy?’ said Susan. ‘She seems
to be so terribly afraid of you all of a sudden. I hope it doesn’t mean
that you have been doing something that she doesn’t approve of.’ I
didn’t make any reply to this insinuation, except to say that the cat
might perhaps be going mad, but this didn’t help me any with Susan,
who was really angry at the idea that her cat could be capable of
going mad.
“The same sort of thing happened every time I went to the house.
The cat was always in the room, and always expressed, in the
plainest way, the opinion that I was a thief and a murderer and an
enemy of the temperance society. When I asked her what she meant
to do, she would give me no reply except a fresh oath or other bad
language. Threats had no effect on her, for she knew that I could not
touch her in Susan’s house, and she didn’t intend that I should catch
her outside of the house. Nothing was clearer than that the Maltese
was bound to make a quarrel between me and Susan, in revenge for
what I had said at Martha’s four-o’clock milk.
“Meanwhile Susan began to take the thing very seriously, and
hinted that the cat’s opposition to me might be a providential warning
against me. ‘I never knew her to take such a prejudice against any
one before,’ she said, ‘except against that converted Jew who
afterward turned out to be a burglar, and nearly murdered poor dear
Mr. Higby, the Baptist preacher, the night he broke into Mr. Higby’s
house and stole all his hams.’ Once when I did manage to give the
Maltese a surreptitious kick, and she yelled as if she was half-killed,
Susan said, ‘I am really afraid I shall have to ask you to leave us
now. Poor pussy’s nerves are so thoroughly upset that I must devote
all my energies to soothing her. I do hope she is mistaken in her
estimate of you.’ This was not very encouraging, and I saw clearly
that if the Maltese kept up her opposition the chances that Susan
would marry me were not worth a rush.
“Did I tell you that I had a large gray cat by the name of Thomas
Aquinas? He was in some respects the most remarkable cat I ever
met. Most people considered him rather a dull person, but among
cats he was conceded to have a colossal mind. Cats would come
from miles away to ask his advice about things. I don’t mean such
trifling matters as his views on mice-catching—which, by the way, is
a thing that has very little interest for most cats—or his opinion of the
best way in which to get a canary bird through the bars of a cage.
They used to consult him on matters of the highest importance, and
the opinions that he used to give would have laid over those of
Benjamin Franklin himself. Why, Martha Washington told me that
Thomas Aquinas knew more about bringing up kittens than the
oldest and most experienced feline matron that she had ever known.
As for common sense, Thomas Aquinas was just a solid chunk of it,
as you might say, and I get into the habit of consulting him whenever
I wanted a good, safe, cautious opinion. He would see at a glance
where the trouble was, and would give me advice that no lawyer
could have beaten, no matter how big a fee he might have charged.
“Well, I went home from Susan’s house, and I said to Thomas
Aquinas, ‘Thomas’—for he was one of those cats that you would no
more have called ‘Tom’ than you would call Mr. Gladstone
‘Bill’—‘Thomas,’ I said, ‘I want you to come with me to Miss Susan’s
and tell that Maltese beast that if she doesn’t quit her practice of
swearing at me whenever I come into the room it will be the worse
for her.’
“‘That’s easy enough,’ said Thomas. ‘I know one or two little things
about that cat that would not do to be told, and she knows that I
know them. Never you fear but that I can shut her up in a moment. I
heard that she was going about bragging that she would get square
with you for something you said to her one day, but I didn’t feel
called upon to interfere without your express approval.’”
“The next day Thomas and I strolled over to Susan’s, and, as luck
would have it, we were shown into her reception-room before she
came downstairs. The Maltese cat was in the room, and began her
usual game of being filled with horror at the sight of such a hardened
wretch as myself. Of course, Thomas Aquinas took it up at once, and
the two had a pretty hot argument. Now Thomas, in spite of his
colossal mind, was a quick-tempered cat, and he was remarkably
free-spoken when he was roused. One word led to another, and
presently the Maltese flew at Thomas, and for about two minutes
that room was so thick with fur that you could hardly see the fight. Of
course, there could have been only one end to the affair. My cat
weighed twice what the Maltese weighed, and after a few rounds he
had her by the neck, and never let go until he had killed her. I was
just saying ‘Hooray! Thomas!’ when Susan came into the room.
“I pass over what she said. Its general sense was that a man who
encouraged dumb animals to fight, and who brought a great savage
brute into her house to kill her sweet little pussy in her own parlor,
wasn’t fit to live. She would listen to no explanations, and when I
said that Thomas had called at my request to reason with the
Maltese about her unkind conduct toward me, Susan said that my
attempt to turn an infamous outrage into a stupid joke made the
matter all the worse, and that she must insist that I and my prize-
fighting beast should leave her house at once and never enter it
again.
“So you see that if it had not been that I understood what the
Maltese cat said at Martha Washington’s milk party, I should
probably never have quarrelled with either Susan or her cat, and
should now have been a missionary in Central Africa, if I hadn’t
blown my brains out or taken to drink. I have often thought that the
man Susan did marry might have been saved if he had known the
cat language in time and had made the acquaintance of the
Maltese.”
The Colonel paused, and presently I asked him if he really
expected us to believe his story.
“Why not?” he replied. “It isn’t any stiffer than Darwin’s yarn about
our being descended from monkeys. You believe that on the word of
a man you never saw, and I expect you to believe my story that I
understand the cat language on my unsupported word. Perhaps the
story is a little tough, but if you are going in for science you shouldn’t
let your credulity be backed down by any story.”
SILVER-PLATED.
The Etruria was nearing New York, and the prospect of the
inevitable interview with the custom-house officers had already cast
a gloom over the passengers. For the most part they were silent, and
their faces wore an anxious and solemn expression. The Rev. Mr.
Waterman, of the Eighth Day Baptist Church, who had bought largely
of ready-made clothing in London, even suggested that it might be
well to hold a prayer-meeting in the saloon.
A group of half a dozen men were sitting in the lee of one of the
deck-houses, smoking silently, when one of the number, a young
and sanguine person, suddenly exclaimed:
“I don’t believe any honest man ever has any trouble with the
custom-house. It’s the fellows who want to defraud the Government
who make all the complaints.”
“What you say may be patriotism and it may be ignorance——”
“What’s the difference?” murmured a cynical interrupter.
“But,” continued the speaker, “it isn’t true. I never tried to defraud
the Government, but for all that I’ve had more trouble with the
custom-house than if I’d been an honest collector of the port trying
not to mix up politics with the business of the office.”
“America expects every man to pay his duty, Colonel,” replied the
sanguine young man, with a vague reminiscence of Nelson. “Tell us
about your trouble, and I rather think you’ll have to admit that it was
because you didn’t want to pay duty on something.”
The Colonel was generally understood by the rest of the
passengers to be a sort of theatrical manager, a position which in the
United States entitles a man to the relative rank of colonel in the
militia and commodore in the canal-boat service. He had on several
occasions shown a knowledge of music and of professional
musicians which had won for him some respect among those of his
fellow-passengers who did not know the difference between a hurdy-
gurdy and a hautboy, and were therefore fond of posing as musical
critics. He was a shrewd, good-tempered colonel, and the barkeeper
said that he was the most elegant, high-toned gentleman he had
ever crossed with.
“Electricity, gentlemen,” resumed the Colonel, “is the biggest thing
of the century, but it has its drawbacks. Did any of you ever happen
to ride on that electric railroad in Berlin? Well, I have, and ’most
anybody who goes to Berlin is liable to ride on it. It taught me,
however, that a man ought to be pretty careful when he trusts
himself in an electric car.
“It happened in this way. I was an agent in the general show
business, and was collecting an opera company for a friend of mine
who was going to open in Chicago. I had come across a first-class
tenor—found him in a country church choir in Germany—and was
bringing him home with me under a contract, when he and I took that
ride on that Berlin electric road. He was a careless sort of chap, and
he sat down in a corner of the car where the electricity had been
leaking and the seat was pretty wet.”
“I never knew before,” remarked the young man, “that electricity
could make a seat wet.”
“Probably not,” retorted the Colonel. “I should judge that there
might be a right smart lot of things that you mightn’t know. Most of
these gentlemen here, however, have probably heard that nowadays
electricity is put up for use in bottles and metallic cans. It stands to
reason that anything capable of being put into a bottle is capable of
leaking, and wetting whatever it leaks on. If there is anybody here
who knows more about bottles than I do, I’m ready to let him tell this
story.
“As I was saying, my man sat down in a sort of pool of electric
fluid, and sat there for about half an hour. He was wearing in the fob-
pocket of his trousers a cheap silver watch. I had given it to him so
that he might get some exercise and prevent himself from getting too
fat. He never suspected my motive, but he tired himself all out
winding it up for two hours every night. Now you may not believe it,
but I give you my word that the electricity completely dissolved that
watch-case and deposited the silver around the man’s waist. He
didn’t find it out till night, and you never saw a man so scared as
when he found that there was a band about four inches wide silver-
plated all round his waist. The doctor told him that the only possible
way of getting it off would be to dissolve it with acid, but that the acid
would eat clean through to his spine and injure his voice. So my
tenor had to let bad enough alone, and be satisfied with another ten-
and-sixpenny gymnasium that I gave him to mollify his feelings.
“We came over on the Arizona, and it got around during the
passage that my man was silver-plated. There was a custom-house
spy on board, and it happened that after the tenor had sworn that he
had nothing dutiable with him, the inspector ordered him to strip and
be personally examined. Of course when this was done it was
discovered that he was silver-plated, and he was held for duty under
the general heading in the tariff of ‘all other articles, silver-plated, or
in whole, and not elsewhere enumerated,’ and taxed fifty per cent ad
valorem and fined two hundred and fifty dollars for failing to declare
that he was plated. He couldn’t pay and I wouldn’t pay, and so he
was locked up in a bonded warehouse, and I went to consult my
lawyer.
“I laid all the facts before him, and told him I would pay him
handsomely if he could get my man out of the custom-house without
paying either duty or fine. Now, the lawyer knew the tariff from
beginning to end, and if any man could help me I knew he could. He
didn’t promise anything at first, but he discussed the question by and
large and in all its bearings.
“‘I’m afraid,’ said he, ‘that there is no hope of getting your friend
out without paying duty, but we may succeed in having him classified
so as to make the duty very low. For instance, you say the man is a
professional singer. Now, we might have him classed as a musical
instrument and taxed forty-five per cent ad valorem. By the bye, what
did you agree to pay him?’
“‘I agreed to pay him,’ says I, ‘a hundred dollars per week.’
“‘That’s bad,’ says the lawyer. ‘A hundred dollars a week is fifty-
two hundred per year, which is about the interest at six per cent on
eighty-seven thousand dollars. You wouldn’t like to pay forty-three or
four thousand dollars duty on him.’
“‘I’d see him sent to Congress first!’ says I.
“‘Very well,’ says the lawyer. ‘Then perhaps we could classify him
as machinery or parts thereof. But you wouldn’t save much in that
way. You’d have to pay forty per cent ad valorem, and very likely the
appraisers would say that you had undervalued the man, and would
value him at double what your contract seems to say he is worth.
They’re bound to protect American machinery against the pauper
labor of Europe every time.’
“‘How would it do to classify him as old family plate?’ said I.
“‘Worse and worse,’ said the lawyer. ‘He’d have to pay sixty per
cent, and you’d have a good deal of difficulty in proving that he is old
family plate. Of course it could be done, but it would probably cost
you more than the whole amount of the duty. They’re a perfectly
honest set of men, the appraisers, and they naturally come high.’
“‘What will I do, then?’ said I; ‘let him die in the custom-house and
then sue for damages?’
“‘There might be something worth while done in that way,’ says the
lawyer, ‘but it would be middling hard on the man. But I’ll tell you
what we can do. Didn’t you say that the man was singing in a church
choir when you hired him?’
“‘I did so,’ says I.
“‘All right,’ says the lawyer. ‘We’ll classify him as an “article used in
the service of religion,” and get him in free of any duty whatever. You
go and get him an engagement in a church without an hour’s delay,
and then come to me. We’ll beat the custom-house this time, sure
enough.’
“I got the man an engagement to sing for a week in a Methodist
meeting-house, and before the week was out he was decided to be
an article used in the service of religion, and was returned to me free
of duty, and cursing the head off of every officer in the revenue
service. The end of it was that my tenor claimed that I had broken
my contract by setting him to sing in a church, and he sued me for
damages, and got them too. So you see, my young friend, that a
man may have trouble with the custom-house who does not want to
defraud the Government out of anything, not even the duty on that
sealskin sack that I hear you have taken apart and packed in a spare
pair of boots.”
THE END.
*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK TOLD BY THE
COLONEL ***
1.D. The copyright laws of the place where you are located also
govern what you can do with this work. Copyright laws in most
countries are in a constant state of change. If you are outside
the United States, check the laws of your country in addition to
the terms of this agreement before downloading, copying,
displaying, performing, distributing or creating derivative works
based on this work or any other Project Gutenberg™ work. The
Foundation makes no representations concerning the copyright
status of any work in any country other than the United States.
1.E.6. You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary,
compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form,
including any word processing or hypertext form. However, if
you provide access to or distribute copies of a Project
Gutenberg™ work in a format other than “Plain Vanilla ASCII” or
other format used in the official version posted on the official
Project Gutenberg™ website (www.gutenberg.org), you must, at
no additional cost, fee or expense to the user, provide a copy, a
means of exporting a copy, or a means of obtaining a copy upon
request, of the work in its original “Plain Vanilla ASCII” or other
form. Any alternate format must include the full Project
Gutenberg™ License as specified in paragraph 1.E.1.
• You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from
the use of Project Gutenberg™ works calculated using the
method you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. The
fee is owed to the owner of the Project Gutenberg™ trademark,
but he has agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to
the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation. Royalty
payments must be paid within 60 days following each date on
which you prepare (or are legally required to prepare) your
periodic tax returns. Royalty payments should be clearly marked
as such and sent to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive
Foundation at the address specified in Section 4, “Information
about donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive
Foundation.”
• You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free
distribution of Project Gutenberg™ works.
1.F.