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Becoming a Public Relations Writer:

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Contents
Preface xi Plain Language 22
About the Author xvii Language Tip 1: Writing
Naturally 22
Language Tip 2: Wordy Phrases 22
Part One PRINCIPLES OF Language Tip 3: Simple Words 23
EFFECTIVE WRITING 1 Language Tip 4: Short Sentences 25
Language Tip 5: Redundancies 25
1 Writing . . . and What It Means Language Tip 6: Active Voice 26
to You 3 Language Tip 7: Adjectives and
Freewriting 3 Adverbs 28
Writing: Creative or Functional 5 Language Tip 8: Right Word,
Creative Writing 5 Wrongly Understood 28
Functional Writing 6 Meaningful Language 30
Creativity and Functionality 7 Diction Tip 1: Word Pictures 30
Writing to Influence 7 Diction Tip 2: Precise Language 31
Becoming a Better Writer 8 Diction Tip 3: Strong Words 32
Writing as an Acquired Talent 9 Diction Tip 4: Clichés and
Writing as a Developing Talent 9 Journalese 32
Writing as an Ongoing Diction Tip 5: Loaded Words 33
Commitment 11 Diction Tip 6: Jargon 34
Diction Tip 7: New Words 36
2 Effective Writing 13 Diction Tip 8: Old Words 37
Standard Usage 13 Diction Tip 9: Foreign Words 37
Usage Tip 1: Rules and Diction Tip 10: Pretentious
Guidelines 14 Language 38
Usage Tip 2: Grammatical Diction Tip 11: Honest Language 38
Fallacies 15 Inclusive Language 40
Usage Tip 3: Levels of Formality 16 Bias Tip 1: Gender 41
Usage Tip 4: Bulky Sentences 16 Bias Tip 2: Physical
Usage Tip 5: Evolving Usage and Characteristics 43
Rules 16 Bias Tip 3: Race and Ethnicity 44
Usage Tip 6: Noun–Pronoun Bias Tip 4: Culture and Lifestyle 45
Agreement 17
Usage Tip 7: Subject–Verb 3 Persuasive and Ethical
Agreement 17 Communication 48
Usage Tip 8: Simple Punctuation 18 Theories of Public
Usage Tip 9: Proper Word Communication 48
Placement 18 Process of Communication 48
Usage Tip 10: Parallel Structure 19 Object of Communication 49
vii
viii Contents

Effect of Communication 50 10 Ways to Generate News 108


Communication and Persuasion 52 News Peg 111
Persuasion 52 Green Dissemination 113
Historical Roots 53
Research on Persuasion 54 6 Fact Sheet and Advisory 116
Social Psychology Research 54 News Fact Sheet 116
Personality Research 55 Background Fact Sheet 120
Lessons from Research 56 Event Listing 121
Lessons about Message Source 57 Media Memo 122
Lessons about Message Structure 61 Media Advisory 123
Lessons about Message Content 61 Story Idea Memo 124
Lessons about Media 62 Pitch Letter 126
Lessons about Audience 63 Public Advisory 126
Propaganda 64
Persuasion versus Propaganda 65 7 News Writing Style 128
Codes of Ethics 67 News Style 129
Short Sentences 129
4 The Writing Process 69 Simple Language 130
Creativity 69 Titles of People 132
Free Association 72 Attribution of Quotes 133
Forced Association 73 Objectivity 136
Strategic Planning 75 Neutrality 137
Analysis of Key Publics 75 Accuracy 138
Planning Sheet 77 Newsworthy Information 138
Elements of a Planning Sheet 78 Legal Issues 139
Pre-Writing Research 80 Defamation 139
Casual Research 80 Privacy 140
Secondary Research 82
Primary Research 83 8 Print News Release 145
Media Directories 83 News Release 146
Nine Steps to Effective Writing 84 News Release Format 147
Going through the Process 87 News Release Writing 152
Lead 153
Wrap-Up for Part One 92 Strategic Focus for the Lead 158
Benefit Statement 160
Info-Action Statement 161
Part Two PUBLIC RELATIONS Secondary Detail 161
WRITING FOR JOURNALISTIC Background Information 161
MEDIA 95 Organizational Identification 162
Examples of News Releases 162
5 News and Public Relations 97 Core News Brief 162
Defining News 97 Local News Release 168
News Interest 100 Types of News Release 170
Categories of News 105 Announcement Release 170
Finding News 106 Follow-Up Release 173
Creating News 107 Rewriting 175
Contents ix

Common Errors in News Releases 176 Analyzing Issues 256


Why So Many Poor Releases? 179 Communicating the Position 256
Position Statement 257
9 Broadcast News Release 182 Part 1: Issue Background 258
Broadcast Writing Style 182 Part 2: Position 260
Broadcast Lead 186 Part 3: Conclusion 261
Pronouncer 189 Writing a Position Statement 261
Broadcast News Release 192 Design Elements 262
Actuality Release 192 Organizational Statement 265
Audio News Release 196 Official Statement 265
Video News Release 197 Contingency Statement 265
B-Roll Package 201 Talking Points 266
Issue Advisory 266
10 Transmedia News Package for Commentary 267
Print, Broadcast, Online and Letter to the Editor 267
Social Media 205 Op-Ed Commentary 270
Email Release 205
Proclamation 271
Social Media Release 208
Petition 272
Transmedia News Package 210
Writing for Transmedia News Wrap-Up for Part Two 274
Package 211
Online Newsroom 221
Online Newsroom Models 224 Part Three PUBLIC RELATIONS
Online Presence 227 WRITING FOR ORGANIZATIONAL
MEDIA 277
11 News Feature 230
News Features for Public Relations 231 13 Newsletter, Magazine and
Writing Style for News Features 232 Corporate Report 279
Writing about People 234 Newsletter and Magazine 279
Biographical Narrative 234 Purpose of Newsletter 280
Personal Profile 235 Types of Newsletter 281
Personal Interview 236 Writing for Newsletter and
Interview Transcript 238 Magazine 283
Writing about Organizations 239 Audience Focus 284
Organizational History 239 Newsletter Writing Style 284
Organizational Profile 240 Headline 286
Background News Feature 242 Corporate Report 289
Writing about Issues 243 Annual Report 289
Service Article 244 Copy-editing 291
Question-and-Answer Feature 246 Intellectual Property Law 295
Short-Form Q&A 250 Copyright 295
Case Study 252 Trademark 298
Information Digest 253 Service Mark 300

12 Advocacy and Opinion 254 14 Website, Blog and Wiki 302


Issues Management 254 Website 302
Identifying Issues 254 Concise Online Writing 305
x Contents

Scannable Online Writing 306 Visual Message 356


Objective Online Writing 307 Verbal Message 357
Interactive Website 307 Advertising Layout 359
Website Evaluation 309 Advertising Media 360
Blog 311 Print Media 360
Blog or Website? 312 Poster Media 360
Attracting Readers to Blogs 313 Broadcast Media 361
Blog Name 314 Digital Media 361
Blog Content 314 Writing Public Relations Ads 361
Writing for Blogs 316 Script Format 363
Blog Format 317 Public Service Advertising 366
Wiki 319 Public Interest 366
Public Relations Uses for Wikis 319 Advertising Council 369
Wiki Writing 320
Wiki Ethics 320 18 Speechwriting 372
Speeches 373
15 Flier and Brochure 322 Planning the Speech 374
Flier 322 Writing the Speech 376
Design for Fliers 323 Effective Speechwriting 379
Brochure 325 Presentation Aids 384
Planning Brochures 327 Evaluating Speeches 386
Production Schedule 331 Interview 387
Being Interviewed 388
16 Direct Mail and Online Appeals 333
Making Appeals 333 Handling Aggressive
Direct Mail and Public Questioners 390
Relations 337 News Conference 391
Strategic Reader Interest 337 Planning Sheet 392
Writing the Appeal 339 Invitational Advisory 392
Putting It Together 343 News Conference Agenda 393
Envelope 343 News Statement 393
Appeal Letter 344 Media Kit 395
Response Device 345 Questions and Answers 395
Acknowledgment 346 Wrap-Up for Part Three 397
Online Fundraising 346
Nonprofit Organizations 347 Appendix A
Political Fundraising 347 Common Sense Stylebook for Public
Power of the Web 348 Relations Writers 399
Cost of Email Fundraising 349
Appendix B
Writing Email Appeals 350
Copy-editing Symbols 417
17 Public Relations Advertising 352
Bibliography 419
Public Relations and Advertising 352
Consumer Advertising 353 Glossary 424
Public Relations Advertising 353
Developing the Message 356 Index 443
Preface
Notes to the Student
An ability to write well is the one skill that employers consistently say they seek among
candidates for public relations positions and for work in marketing communication, advertising,
fundraising, events planning and other related fields. Other skills are important; good writing
is crucial. If you develop your writing abilities now, you can look confidently toward a bright
professional future.
“Becoming a Public Relations Writer” can help you develop that writing skill. As a student
in a public relations class, your progress toward becoming an effective professional writer
rests on four pillars: yourself, your classmates, your instructor and this book.

Your Role
As the student, you are expected to put forth your best efforts in this class. Work hard and
open yourself to advice and constructive criticism. You will need to face head-on the challenges
that this program of study will offer you.

Your Classmates
No student is alone in this learning process. You are part of a team, and your classmates will
be learning along with you. They also will share their ideas about writing in general and about
your writing in particular. They will expect you to share your honest thoughts and advice
about their writing as well.

Your Instructor
Every team needs a coach, and that is the major role your instructor will play. Your instructor
will get you started and give you feedback and correction. You will get help when you need
it and receive praise when it’s due. Don’t expect your instructor to have all the answers. For
some questions there may be no single, right answer. Rather, look to your instructor as someone
who has traveled this road before you, someone who can share the benefit of personal
experience as a writer and who can help you draw on your own experience and insight as you
seek to develop as a professional writer.

This Book
“Becoming a Public Relations Writer” has been written to help guide you through the writing
process. It will lead you through the various steps and stages of writing and will help you
explore many formats and styles necessary to public relations writers. Because this book grows
out of the author’s professional and teaching experience, it is limited to the insight of one
xi
xii Preface

person. Your own experiences and those of your instructor and colleagues are likely to add
to the conclusions and the advice offered here.
There may be times when your instructor will disagree with something in this book. So,
too, there probably will be times when future employers and colleagues also disagree with
this book, with each other, with your instructor, and probably with you. Celebrate this
intellectual diversity and divergent professional perspectives. Revel in the flexibility that is
part of the art of writing for public relations. Your chosen profession is rich with nuance and
alive to various interpretations.

Notes to the Instructor


“Becoming a Public Relations Writer” is based on a process approach to writing, which builds
into the class a significant interaction between the student and the instructor as well as among
the students. With this in mind, the book presumes and encourages an interactive environment,
and it has been written to make use of several course-related activities. The following activities
are likely to be part of your experience as you use this book.

In-Class Writing
Because information necessary for students has been included in the book, the instructor can
focus a majority of in-class time on practice writing rather than lecturing about writing. Each
chapter has exercises designed to provide a basis for these in-class activities. On some
occasions, students may write in the presence of the instructor, who provides direction and
feedback. At other times, students may use class time for rewriting, an integral part of the
writing process. In-class writing is meant to be critiqued but not necessarily graded.

Out-of-Class Writing
Each chapter includes exercises that provide the basis for out-of-class writing assignments.
When they receive homework assignments, students should leave the classroom knowing what
needs to be done, perhaps having discussed in general terms how they will approach the
assignment. An effective learning situation is to invite students, upon turning in these
assignments at a subsequent class meeting, to discuss their experiences with the assignment.
It is especially helpful to focus on what worked and what didn’t work. It has been my
experience that this provides an opportunity to reinforce and/or clarify the concepts important
to the assignment. Throughout the interactive classroom environment, students should be
encouraged to share problems, successes and insights with their instructor and their classmates.

Discussion Topics
Many exercises in this book are designed for an interactive learning approach built on
discussion among students who help each other develop their writing skills. Each chapter has
certain exercises that call for students to gather their thoughts in freewriting and then to discuss
particular topics. Such procedures are designed to encourage participation, foster shared
learning and build levels of trust that will support student writing groups. I have found that
this is time well spent in the learning process.
Preface xiii

Writing Models
This book provides models and samples of various kinds of public relations writing so students
can see in them patterns and guides. These models are not meant to be copied but rather to
stimulate ideas for students’ own writing. Some of these models use either actual or hypothetical
scenarios developed by the author; others are provided by public relations practitioners using
examples of their professional writing. Students also are encouraged to share with each other
samples of their writing. Instructors may find it useful to share some of their own writing
with students. Regardless of the source, these models should be considered helpful samples
rather than perfect examples.

Writing Conferences
Ideally, this course will include one-on-one writing conferences between the student and the
instructor. Such conferences can provide an opportunity for students to evaluate their own
progress and to discuss their writing strengths and areas in which they need to improve.
Conferences also offer an occasion for seeking and giving advice about making the writing
process easier and better.

Writing Groups
As students move from the introductory materials into writing projects based on various formats
used in public relations writing, they are encouraged to participate in out-of-class writing
groups with other students in the class. Such groups provide opportunities for students to
share advice, learn from each other and sharpen their editing and critiquing skills. They also
provide a valuable support to each student moving through the coursework.

Notes on This Fifth Edition


Textbooks go through revisions so that they can be kept current and can feature new topics
and themes. This fifth edition of “Becoming a Public Relations Writer” is no exception.
As the author, I am humbled by the confidence that instructors have placed in this book,
and I am aware of my responsibility to students to provide the best teaching tool that I can.
This newest edition maintains the process approach to writing, with some new topics for
discussion and interaction among students and with their instructors. This edition has updated
examples of actual pieces of public relations writing.
This edition maintains the approach that instructors said served their students well, with
three separate sections: writing in general, writing through journalistic media and writing
through organizational and promotional media.
Instructors, reviewers and public relations writers themselves who are familiar with the
previous version will find a positive development in the content of this edition.
The new subtitle for this text—“Strategic Writing for Emerging and Established Media”—
emphasizes not only the obvious technological developments in online and social media but
also the continuing need for writing strategically. People hiring public relations graduates say
they expect basic writing skills, but what they are looking for is insight into how to strategically
use media with messages that can support an organization’s mission and vision.
xiv Preface

This fifth edition of “Becoming a Public Relations Writer” maintains instruction on the
established print and broadcast media venues that traditionally have been associated with the
practice of public relations.
This edition also enhances the presentation of theory and research, especially in the areas
of persuasive communication, to help public relations practitioners be more influential in their
writing. It also updates the many studies and reports included throughout the book.
It expands examples and guidelines dealing with websites, blogs, social media networking
sites, email, digital audio and video, and related aspects of contemporary practice in public
relations. In particular this edition presents a transmedia model for a comprehensive news
release package that can serve the needs and interests of all kinds of media: print, broadcast,
online and social media. Students can learn how to maximize their effort and effectiveness
by creating a single news package rather than developing separate releases for each media
type.

Who Uses This Book?


I am pleased by the international acceptance of this book since it was first published in 1996
and updated in 2003, 2008 and 2012. As the author, I am humbled by the confidence that so
many educators have placed in this book, and I am quite aware of my responsibility to their
students to provide the best teaching resource that I can.
To date, more than 150 colleges and universities in 40 states and abroad in Australia,
Canada, China and Macedonia have adopted this text for public relations classes at both the
graduate and undergraduate levels.
Additionally, more than 800 academic libraries in the U.S., Canada, Asia, Latin America,
the Caribbean, Africa, Australia, the Middle East and both Western and Eastern Europe have
acquired the text for their collections.

Writing Style
Because public relation practitioners need a consistent writing style, I have adopted the most
common guide—Associated Press Stylebook—as the writing standard for this book.
My intention in choosing this journalistic pattern rather than a more common literary
style for books is my hope that “Becoming a Public Relations Writer” can serve as a model
for students as they increase their proficiency in writing. By seeing AP style used, they can
more easily adapt it for their own professional writing.
As such, this book follows the characteristics of AP style: capitalization, spelling and
punctuation consistent with journalistic style; use of quotation marks rather than italics for
titles of book and other compositions; and the general practice of letting the word “and”
replace a final comma in a sequence (instead of using the so-called Oxford comma that ends
a series with both “and” and a comma).
Literary purists may disagree with my choice, though there seem to be few such purists
practicing public relations. But my purpose is to help instructors teach students how to
effectively use the standard stylebook for journalistic and public relations writing. Appendix
A to this book, Common Sense Stylebook for Public Relations Writers, is rooted in the AP
Stylebook.
Preface xv

Acknowledgments
John Donne got it right: No one is an island. Neither does an author write alone. Rather, we
writers reflect in some way the insight of others in the field who write, teach, study and engage
in the practice.
“Becoming a Public Relations Writer” enjoys the input of many people. As the author of
this textbook, I take personal responsibility for any errors or omissions, but I’m confident
that these are fewer because of the advice and assistance of many knowledgeable people who
helped with this book.
Collectively, my students have been major contributors to this book. It is in the classroom
that I have tested and refined the ideas contained herein. My students have prodded me to
articulate my ideas and to bolster them with plenty of real-world examples.
My academic colleagues at Buffalo State (with its flagship communication department
in the State University of New York) emphasize practical, applied communication. I have
benefited from ongoing professional conversations with them, as well as my interaction with
friends at other colleges and universities. My colleagues within the Public Relations Society
of America have consistently helped me with their insight and constructive criticism.
My publishing team at Routledge/Taylor & Francis has been helpful and supportive through
the progress of this new edition. In particular my editor, Linda Bathgate, has piloted this craft
through the publishing waters.
Authors appreciate the comments and criticism of their peers, and I am particularly grateful
to the faculty across the country who have taken time from their busy teaching schedules to
offer comments and suggestions. Likewise, I have appreciated the comments and suggestions
I have received not only from my PRSA colleagues but also from people associated with the
Canadian Public Relations Society.
I also appreciate the comments of students who use this book. You are the ultimate experts
on whether this is an effective aid to your professional education. Whether I’ve taught you
directly, or only indirectly through this book, I’m grateful for your questions and suggestions.

Personal Dedication
Like the entirety of my life, this book is dedicated to my family. Though they don’t realize
it, my three sons have been an inspiration as I worked on this book. We would sometimes sit
across the desk from each other, me working at my computer, one of them at theirs.
As he progressed through college in Buffalo and eventually earned a doctorate at Osaka
University, my son Josh has challenged me to explain public relations every time I suggested
that he consider the insights of the discipline on his own multifaceted work as a sociologist
and ethnomusicologist, a concert performer on the shakuhachi (Japanese bamboo flute), an
iaido black belt, a restaurateur and certified sake expert, and a university professor teaching
communication research.
My son Aaron graduated with a degree in public relations, having had the dubious
experience of having me as instructor for two of his undergraduate courses. After starting his
own career in the field of public relations and marketing, Aaron took his communication and
strategic planning talents to the Army, where he has proudly (and safely) served in Qatar,
South Korea and currently Okinawa. Not bad for the son of a father who was discharged from
the Navy during the Vietnam era as a conscientious objector.
xvi Preface

My youngest son Matt is advancing in his career in horticulture and an active avocation
in music. His writing talent and artistic sense have served him well in his career in landscape
design, and his appreciation for public relations and marketing are fueling his entrepreneurial
spirit.
Whether by their presence or Skype-facilitated association with me, my daughters-in-law
Satomi, Jen and Jessica provide me with the love and encouragement any writer needs to be
successful. My granddaughters Miana, Mariella and Emalyn and my grandsons Kazutaka and
Lief provide excellent reasons to step away from my writing from time to time and dream of
the wonders their lives will bring.
My greatest appreciation goes to my wife, Dawn Minier Smith. During the evolution of
this book from conception to this new edition, Dawn has been my sounding board. A writing
teacher herself, she has lent her ear as I tested ideas, tried out new ways to present lessons
and attempted to make sense of theories, cases and observations. She reminds me when to
use “whom,” and we agree to disagree on using the Oxford comma.
Since she doesn’t see any domestic value in a wife fawning over her husband, Dawn’s
constructive criticism has been always trustworthy and thus most valuable. I always take her
suggestions seriously. Sometimes I’ve even had the good sense to follow them.

An Invitation
This book is the result of much dialog with others, particularly feedback from my students.
But reader reaction is inevitably helpful. I invite all readers—students, teachers and
practitioners—to share your thoughts with me. Send your comments and suggestions for future
editions. Share your success stories and your frustrations with this book. You can contact me
via email at smithrd@buffalostate.edu.
I also invite you to use my website (ron-smith.com), where I have included an expanding
number of pages and links related to public relations and other aspects of strategic
communication.
Likewise, I invite you to the publisher’s companion website for this book at www.routledge.
com/cw/smith.
About the Author
Ronald D. Smith, APR, is Professor of Public Communication at SUNY Buffalo State, the
largest comprehensive college within the State University of New York. He has taught courses
in public relations planning, research, writing, case studies and related areas to undergraduate
and graduate students.
Smith has worked as a consultant in public relations and strategic communications,
assisting businesses and nonprofit organizations with planning, research, communication
management and media training. He has conducted workshops and professional seminars for
charitable, military, religious, labor, educational, municipal, governmental and other
organizations at regional, state and national levels. He also has served as a consultant with
other educational institutions in creating and assessing programs to teach public relations.
For nearly eight years, Smith served as chair of the 850-student Communication
Department at SUNY Buffalo State. Under his leadership, the college became the only public
institution in New York State with degree programs recognized by the Accrediting Council
for Education and Journalism and Mass Communications. He currently serves on site review
teams with ACEJMC.
He also served for more than two years as interim associate dean of the School of Arts
and Humanities at Buffalo State. In 2013 he returned to his role as professor, teaching
advanced courses and advising students, particularly those who are at risk academically.
In this book, Smith draws on considerable professional experience in print, broadcast and
digital media. In addition to more than 25 years as an educator and public relations consultant,
he worked for 10 years as public relations director for a nonprofit organization and eight years
as a newspaper reporter and editor. He served as a Navy public affairs journalist in Vietnam.
Smith holds a bachelor’s degree in English education from Lock Haven (Pa.) University
and a master’s degree in public relations from Syracuse (N.Y.) University. He has published
research on public relations and persuasive communication. He is the author of “Strategic
Planning for Public Relations” (5th edition in press, Routledge) and “Public Relations: The
Basics” (2014, Routledge). He is co-author of “MediaWriting” (4th edition, 2012, Routledge).
He is also the author of “Objectives” and “Strategic Inaction” for C.E. Carroll’s “Encyclopedia
of Corporate Reputation” (2016, Sage) and “Campaign Design and Management” in W.H.
Eadie’s “SAGE 21st Century Reference Series: Communication” (2009, Sage).
Smith founded his department’s American Indian Policy and Media Initiative, which
focuses on the intersection of Native American issues, public policy and media. He is co-
editor and contributor for “Shoot the Indian: Media, Misperception and Native Truth” (2007,
AIPMI) and has conducted and published research on topics such as the media coverage of
the Cherokee citizenship vote and media coverage in New York State on Indian treaty,
sovereignty and taxation issues. He has assisted in strategic planning with the Smithsonian’s
National Museum of the American Indian and the National Congress of American Indians
and has worked with research and strategic planning with several individual tribes. He has
xvii
xviii About the Author

presented original research on Native Americans and media at the Association for Education
in Journalism and Mass Communication.
Smith is an accredited member of the Public Relations Society of America and has served
as president of PRSA’s Buffalo/Niagara chapter and chair of the Northeast District. He has
been named Practitioner of the Year by his local chapter, which has also given him several
special service and project awards. He also received a Distinguished Service Medal for his
work in helping prepare candidates for accreditation.
Part One
PRINCIPLES OF
EFFECTIVE WRITING

Y
ou already are a writer! That’s right. You’re already a writer or you wouldn’t have
made it this far. You wouldn’t have been allowed to register for a college writing course
if you aren’t already a writer with sufficient skill.
The issue before you now is: Do you want to become a public relations writer? Do you
want to build skills to help you succeed in your career in public relations? With this book
and a fair amount of work, you can succeed. Repeat that thought: You can become a public
relations writer! You’ll probably even find yourself carried to a higher level of enjoyment
with all your writing.
As Desiderius Erasmus, the Dutch Renaissance-era scholar, observed: “The desire to write
grows with writing.” So sharpen your writing talent and begin what can be a pleasurable
journey toward becoming a public relations writer.
Part One of this book deals with the basics of writing in professional contexts. It begins
with an exploration of your attitudes toward writing and follows with a brief refresher on
writing principles.
It also features an overview of communication theory relevant to effective writing. It
introduces a methodical look at some practices basic to all kinds of public relations writing,
both as it is associated with established print and broadcast media and with newer emerging
digital and social media.
Because it deals with the basics of writing, this section of “Becoming a Public Relations
Writer” also should give you a footing for yet-undeveloped media opportunities that
undoubtedly will come in the future. Work progresses on smart phones, computer tablets and
related technologies that will offer quicker, more mobile and more efficient multimedia
opportunities.
Meanwhile, engineers are developing technology that is becoming much less expensive
and less reliant on digital infrastructures, so that one day computers likely will be in the hands
of virtually everyone in the world, regardless of their socio-economic status or technological
sophistication.
Software offering reliable and high-quality instant translations, both written and oral,
may help us communicate with people across today’s political, cultural and language barriers.
Let your imagination soar as you dream of the possibilities that the future may bring. Think
about all the benefits they might bring to the professions of public relations and marketing
communication.
1
2 Part One PRINCIPLES OF EFFECTIVE WRITING

Yet amid all these visions of what may take place next, the need also will remain for
clear, effective, persuasive and ethical writing. That is the basis of Part One of this book,
which includes four chapters and a concluding section:
• Chapter 1: Writing . . . and What It Means to You.
• Chapter 2: Effective Writing.
• Chapter 3: Persuasive and Ethical Communication.
• Chapter 4: The Writing Process.
• Wrap-Up for Part One.
1 Writing . . . and What It
Means to You

Writing. It is the most important professional skill for public relations practitioners. Employers
complain that job candidates can’t write adequately. Teachers fret that today’s students don’t
write as well as their predecessors. And in moments of candor, most students admit they are
unsure about their writing skill.
Throughout your academic career, you have been faced with many ideas about writing.
Perhaps you have become aware of some mixed messages. If you have, that’s to be expected,
because there certainly are a lot of different thoughts about writing—what it is, how we learn
to write well, how we can use writing personally and professionally, and whether we are any
good at it.
This chapter will help you begin to sort through what you have learned about writing
and what you have experienced through writing. It will help you identify your own relationship
with writing. We’ll start with freewriting, then look at the creative and functional aspects
of writing and end with a discussion of how to become a better writer and your personal
commitment to this outcome.
Eventually, these writing basics will lead you to apply your writing skills to the many
and varied opportunities available to public relations writers. Some of these will be associated
with traditional print and broadcast media. Others are associated with new and emerging media.
Here are your learning objectives for this chapter:
• To use the technique of freewriting.
• To understand the relationship between creative and functional writing.
• To explain the concept of writing to influence.
• To develop a process of drafting and revising.

Freewriting
Before we proceed, you need to learn a writing technique that you will be using a lot in this
program—freewriting. As prescriptions for better writing go, this one is pretty painless when
taken in moderation. Freewriting is a kind of stream-of-consciousness writing for a period
of time without stopping and without self-editing. Its purpose is to get your initial thoughts
on paper. Freewriting is a simple and effective procedure that can help you in several ways:
• Getting started when you’re not quite sure where you’re going.
• Organizing your thoughts.
3
4 Part One PRINCIPLES OF EFFECTIVE WRITING

• Preparing to write more formally or to go public with your writing.


• Overcoming writer’s block.
How do you freewrite? Take pen in hand, or fingers to keyboard, or mouth to microphone
for speech-recognition software. Simply start writing. Keep writing for a certain period of
time; five minutes is a good length. Much longer and freewriting becomes drafting, and then
you’re not freewriting anymore.
The method is simple: Force yourself to keep writing throughout the five minutes. Don’t
pause to ponder. Don’t edit. Don’t correct spelling or grammatical errors. Freewriting is very
informal, and it’s usually not meant for anyone else to read. Rather, it can serve as the basis
for a very rough first draft. Here is one of the author’s freewrites that helped set the stage for
this chapter:

Begin by talking about the fun of writing, and the fear. I can do it. That’s what the reader should take
home. How to get to that point? Probably by talking about ideas like why to write, how to get in the
mood, what writing can accomplish. Things like purpose. Motivation. Fun. Challenge. Motivation is a
major goal of the opening chapter. Too often we think we can’t when really we could if only we know
how. Just a matter of learning something new, or a better way of doing it. Focus on motivation. I want
my students to begin this course with the thought, belief, that they can become better writers. Through
it all, a course like this should be fun. Challenging, but fun too.

So what do you think about writing? Like so much about the art of writing, this question
has no right or wrong answers. Merely by considering the question you can begin to arrive
at your own conclusions. Or perhaps you can simply become more comfortable in your
ambiguity. But, as you consider your own perspectives on writing, you are already in the
process of becoming a better writer.
The 12th-century Chinese philosopher, Zhu Xi, urged his students to practice self-
examination every day: “If you find faults, correct them. When you find none, try even harder.”
Good advice! As you seek to become a better writer, take time to poke around the wrinkles
of your mind. Probe your attitudes about writing. Consider your comfort level as a wordsmith.
Think about what you think about writing, especially your own. Have you been told, for
example, that you are a good writer? If so, has the affirmation come from somebody who
knows what he or she is talking about (that is, from a good writer, a knowledgeable teacher,
or a competent editor)? Or was it your grandmother who praised your Valentine poem? Praise
from family and friends is important for our emotional well-being, but you can’t necessarily
build on it professionally.
On the other hand, do you think of yourself as an inadequate writer? It’s unlikely that
strangers on the street or little children in the park have pointed this out to you, so where did
you get the negative notion? What have you done to dismiss it as perhaps the exaggeration
of your overly self-conscious ego, or perhaps to embrace it as a worthy opponent to be bested?
The point is, the more self-aware you are of yourself as a writer, the better writer you
can become.
1 Writing . . . and What It Means to You 5

Exercise 1.1

Freewriting on Writing
Part 1. Freewrite for five minutes on the following topic: What do I think of writing? Do I
like to write? Do I find it easy? Do I write just for the fun of it, or only when I have to?
Do I think I am a good writer? Why do I want to improve as a writer? How might I improve?

Part 2. Take a few minutes to review what you wrote in Part 1. Go back and underline
what you think is the most important or most insightful.

Writing: Creative or Functional


Self-examination is the first step toward excellence. You have already begun to become a
better writer just by completing the first exercise. Now let’s tighten the margins a bit and look
at two relationships within writing that are important to us as public relations writers: creative
writing and functional writing.
Sometimes, students in public relations writing classes have said they are more comfortable
with creative writing but are unsure of themselves with the functional writing they expect to
find in public relations. That’s understandable. The formats we use for various public relations
purposes—news releases, organizational reports and proposals, persuasive appeals and so
on—often have a number of “rules” to follow. It can feel like a paint-by-numbers approach
to writing. Where’s the creativity? Where’s the fun? At what point does skill become talent?

Exercise 1.2

Creative and Functional Writing


Part 1. Look up the following words in your dictionary and note their similarities and
differences: creative, artistic, artful, imaginative, innovative and aesthetic. Now do the same
with another set of words: Purpose, intention, function, rationale and objective.

Part 2. Freewrite for five minutes on the following questions: How do creative and functional
writing compare? How do these definitions come together to describe writing? Discuss
this with your classmates.

Creative Writing
All writing is creative and artistic. Creative writing emphasizes imaginative, artistic and
sometimes innovative style. It is the result of one mind creating an idea and sharing it with
someone else. The idea may take various forms—a science fiction adventure, a carefully
researched historical novel, lyrical poetry, a corporate report, an informative news release, a
6 Part One PRINCIPLES OF EFFECTIVE WRITING

compelling sales letter and so on. Writing is creative when we use it to shape a thought—
molding it, wrapping it in a particular writing format and ultimately sharing it with another
person.
Creative writing is not solely a product of the imagination, although it may begin there.
But it could just as well begin in an interview or through painstaking research. What fills writing
with creativity is the insight and ownership a writer brings to the ideas and facts. A public
relations writer will adopt the task at hand and, however fleetingly, will possess the ideas and
thoughts surrounding the writing project. A good writer will caress a thought, coupling facts
and ideas, giving birth to vignettes and parables, gaining insight and making observations.
But, you say: All this to promote a supermarket opening? Ah, but that’s where the art
takes shape, as the writer weaves words and phrases, facts and ideas, putting them before the
reader in a way that serves the original purpose. We write creatively when we take a thought,
wherever it originated, and artfully share it with others.

Functional Writing
Functional writing is an approach to writing that emphasizes purpose, format and objective.
It is writing on a mission. Think about this. We always write for some reason. We hope to
accomplish something through our words, so we write with purpose—more often, with several
purposes.
Recall the last writing assignment you completed for a class. What was your purpose in
writing it? To show your professor that you understood the subject matter? To get a good
grade? To make your professor happy? To simply have something, anything, to turn in so you
wouldn’t get scolded? These are all reasons for writing (some, obviously, better reasons than
others). Now consider: What was the purpose behind the last business letter you wrote? How
about the last job application? The last email home? Or your most recent tweet or blog entry?
You wrote each for a reason, too.
Think about what you already know about the following purposes of any type of writing:

• To describe someone or something.


• To explain or justify.
• To provide information.
• To express an opinion.
• To persuade toward some feeling or action.
• To entertain.
• To inspire or motivate.
• To express our inner thoughts.
Novelist F. Scott Fitzgerald reminded us about such purposeful writing: “You don’t write
because you want to say something, you write because you have something to say.” The thought
pre-exists, giving rise to the act of writing.
A novel may be written to entertain or to present a point of view. Or maybe it’s simply
written to sell a lot of copies and make a bundle of money for the author.
Consider poetry. Its purpose may be to enlighten the mind of the reader, enrage one to
action, inspire the soul. Maybe it’s simply a means for self-expression, or part of an elaborate
seduction scheme aimed at your new boyfriend or girlfriend. Maybe it’s just a way to kill a
gloomy afternoon when your friends aren’t around.
1 Writing . . . and What It Means to You 7

Likewise there is purpose and reason behind every kind of writing: short story, rap lyric,
parable, love letter, text message, greeting card, prayer, essay, feature story, research report
. . . and public relations writing. The purpose may be profound or practical, but it’s your reason
for writing. And that makes it worth doing well.
“If it ain’t on the page, then it ain’t on the stage,” wrote Paul Dusseault of Fleischman/
Hilliard in Atlanta (2016). “Nothing happens—not a special event, not a speech, not a website,
not a viral video, not a brilliant media strategy, not an op-ed, not an award-winning program,
not even an affective Facebook post—without someone, somewhere, committing words to
paper.”
In the profession of public relations, we find a use for virtually every writing purpose
except, perhaps, self-expression. We write news releases to inform external audiences and
newsletters to share information with internal ones. We write brochures to explain our products
and services. We write letters and guest editorials to express opinions, and public service
advertisements to persuade. We prepare scripts for speeches and television programs that we
hope will influence our audiences, and we create blog pages and Facebook posts to educate
and motivate.
These are just some of the purposes and some of the formats a public relations writer
will use to communicate effectively.

Creativity and Functionality


In Exercise 1.2, you were asked to consider the relationship between creative and functional
writing. Reconsider what you wrote there in light of this observation: Creativity and
functionality can co-exist in your writing.
You may not have considered this idea before. Instead of either/or, think of both/and.
You don’t have to put writing into boxes—one marked “creative writing,” the other marked
“functional writing.” Your writing actually can be both. It is more like a see-saw, one side
balancing toward functional writing, the other pointing more toward the creative side. Both
aspects of writing complement each other. It’s a matter of looking at the balance between the
two. Let’s combine creativity and functionality in writing under the heading “Writing to
Influence.” That’s what public relations writing is all about.

Writing to Influence
Because there are so many different formats for public relations writing, it can be useful to
categorize them into different types. A common division is to group public relations writing
as being either informational or persuasive. Each of these segments is said to have certain
formats. For example, news releases and brochures usually are seen as formats for informational
writing, whereas speeches and public service advertising are said to be formats for persuasive
writing.
That’s a neat distinction in some ways. It helps us understand that there are various writing
formats and that their differences influence how and when they can be used. But there is a
problem with such a distinction because it is an oversimplification. All public relations writing
attempts to influence people in some way. If you aren’t trying to make an impact on your
readers, why write? Without intending to affect readers in some way, you’re just wasting time.
So let’s look for a more unified perspective. As a writer, you have a particular effect in
mind when you write. You want to increase your public’s knowledge and understanding about
8 Part One PRINCIPLES OF EFFECTIVE WRITING

something, you want people to feel a certain way about this information, and you probably
want them to respond to that information in a particular way.
In some journalism-oriented formats such as news releases, information is presented in
an objective manner. But the writer still can attempt to persuade, using techniques such as
persuasive message sources and appeals. On the other hand, some public relations writing is
meant to enhance relationships and to communicate between an organization and its publics
in a quest for mutual benefits. Here too, however, the writer is trying to influence readers,
seeking at least to motivate and empower them in their efforts to strengthen the relationship.

Exercise 1.3

Defining Public Relations


Background: Many people are confused about the meaning of public relations, and no
uniform definition exists even among public relations practitioners. Meanwhile, some
people are critical of what they presume public relations to be about. Nevertheless, some
commonly held characteristics of public relations exist. These include two-way
communication, research and strategic planning, accuracy and honesty, effective and ethical
behavior, and mutual benefits for both an organization and its public.

Scenario: A relative you respect is trying to dissuade you from entering public relations.
This person says that public relations practitioners are manipulators who rely on half-truths,
spin and hype on behalf of unworthy clients.

Part 1. Write a short letter to this relative, telling him or her what public relations means
to you. Address this person’s concerns about your likely profession.

Part 2. After writing this letter, review your freewrite from Exercise 1.2 about creative and
functional writing. Then, with this in mind, freewrite on the following topic: How is my letter
an attempt to provide information, and how is it an attempt to persuade the reader? Discuss
this with your classmates.

Becoming a Better Writer


Some college students have no problem with self-confidence. They often think they are better
writers than they really are: “But I always got good grades for my writing.” If you are such
a student, you may be troubled when your public relations instructor requires you to conform
to higher writing standards than you are used to. You may find it difficult to make a transition
from an anything-goes freewriting style into the type of logical, focused writing needed in
most forms of public relations writing.
On the other hand, too many students express discomfort and lack of confidence with
their writing abilities, often because they don’t really know if their writing is good or not. As
a student, two factors work against your feeling good about yourself as a writer. For one thing,
in your educational career you have been in class for thousands of days, tens of thousands of
1 Writing . . . and What It Means to You 9

hours. You may have had someone telling you that your writing needs to be corrected . . . and
here’s how. After a while, the message comes through: Your writing isn’t good enough. It
always needs to be improved, and you can’t do it by yourself.
In either scenario, the fact may be simply that you aren’t an accomplished writer—yet.
But in this course, by using this book and following your teacher’s advice, you can try to
change that. How?
• By having plenty of opportunities to break bad writing habits and build better ones
(translation: homework and writing assignments).
• By learning and applying the elements of good public relations writing (more
homework).
• By gaining some criteria for evaluating writing, including your own. Then you won’t
have to guess if it is good writing or not. You’ll know when it is. And you’ll know
when it isn’t, so you can fix it.

Writing as an Acquired Talent


Speaking is natural communication. Writing isn’t! People are born with a natural ability and
inclination to speak, but no one is born with a special ability to write well. Writing is a learned
skill. In our society, we begin learning to write early in life and continue to develop as writers
throughout our lifetimes.
Learning to write is a lot like learning to play the saxophone, cultivating a strong backhand
for tennis, or becoming a good dancer. A dancer, for example, must have an element of natural
talent, but that talent improves with practice. Not just casual or occasional practice, but
intensive, conscious and passionate practice. That’s why prima ballerinas go to class every
morning to fine-tune their skills. Similarly, that’s why world-class athletes spend hours every
day in exercise, muscle training and nutritional eating. Excellence doesn’t come cheap, and
quality is built not on dreams but on persistent effort. Writing practice, in fact, has real longevity.
Long after the athlete’s arm is shot and the ballerina’s flexibility is but a memory, a writer’s
talent keeps improving with age.
When you learn to write, you need the ingredients: a bit of ability, a good teacher and
writing coach, a sense of order and beauty, respect for precision and innovation, confidence
and another dose of confidence. Then you need the recipe for writing: practice, practice and
a bit more practice.
Encouragement for such consistency came from Publilius Syrus, a writer, philosopher
and slave in classical Rome: “Practice is the best of all instructors.”
Twenty centuries later, Thomas Wolfe suggested: “Write every day.”
One student in a public relations writing class observed: “The more I write, the better
my writing becomes.” Yay! She gets it!

Writing as a Developing Talent


When you read, do you ever stop and think, “Wow! I like the way the writer said that”? If
you really want to become a better writer, train yourself to be a more critical observer of other
people’s writing.
How to do that? First, hang out with good writers. You’ll find them in the library in the
literature and poetry sections, in quality newspapers and magazines, even online if you look
beyond the verbiage and drivel that takes up much virtual space.
10 Part One PRINCIPLES OF EFFECTIVE WRITING

Once you do find an example of good writing, roll around in it like a wet dog rolls in
the grass—unself-consciously and with abandon. Take note of how the writer has used the
language, how words and phrases have been woven together.
Remember that effective writing is a continuing process of writing and rewriting. As a
reader who wants to write, you may have a significant disadvantage. Your entire background
in reading has exposed you mainly to the finished work of other writers. From the stories of
J.K. Rowling to Henry David Thoreau and Mark Twain, from the Bill of Rights to Sports
Illustrated—you have seen completed pieces of writing. Too bad, because you’ve been missing
a lot of good stuff.
Supreme Court Justice Louis Brandeis had said it a bit more elegantly: “There is no great
writing, only great rewriting.”
Novelist James Michener echoed that thought: “I’m not a very good writer, but I’m an
excellent rewriter.”
The acclaimed novelist Ernest Hemingway was characteristically blunt: “The first draft
of anything is shit.”
When we see only the final writing, we sometimes are attracted by the talent of the authors.
We use words like “gifted” and “genius” to describe them. But finished products don’t allow
us to see the so-called great writers as wordsmiths. They are technicians who have fashioned
their works of art, one word at a time. Playwright and novelist Oscar Wilde gave this wonderful
anecdote into the attention that writers give to their use of language: “I was working on the
proof of one of my poems all morning, and took out a comma. In the afternoon I put it back
again.”
Distinguished literature and powerful rhetoric seldom come by inspiration, delivered as
a finished package. Rather, the great writers craft their words with care, often with patience
and fortitude.
What might you find if you compared the various drafts of the Gettysburg Address with
its final version? You would find, for example, that the first version had one sentence of 82
words, with several grammatical errors. Abraham Lincoln revised his text through six versions.
He changed some phrases. “It is rather for us, the living, to stand here” evolved into “It is
for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought
here have thus far so nobly advanced.” Far more eloquent phrasing. Lincoln also added some
phrases, most notably “under God” in his draft phrase “that this nation under God shall have
a new birth of freedom.”
Do you think you could learn something about Ernest Hemingway by seeing what he
added or deleted as he completed the final manuscript for “A Farewell to Arms”? Would it
be interesting to compare the script revisions of your favorite “Family Guy” reruns or episodes
of “The Vampire Diaries”? You might take comfort in knowing that some successful writers
have been less than proficient about the mechanics of writing. Presidents have speechwriters;
corporate officers have assistants who help shape their writing.
Even respected literary figures get help sometimes. Theodore Dreiser, who is ranked among
the best American novelists, reportedly had several rewriters who polished and smoothed out
his prose. F. Scott Fitzgerald is said to have been such a dreadful speller that his writing
bordered on illiteracy. But he had supportive editors, and Fitzgerald has come to be regarded
as one of the great novelists of the Jazz Age of American literature.
In public relations, plan on producing several drafts of any piece of writing. You will find
that each version gets better. Each becomes more effective for your purposes, until eventually
1 Writing . . . and What It Means to You 11

you are satisfied that you have produced the best piece of writing you can (within limitations
of time and resources, of course). This book will help you develop your written communication
skills, strengthening what works and perhaps finding something that can work even better.
Throughout this book, you will find many opportunities to develop your writing talents.
Sometimes you will be given samples of writing at various stages of development. You may
share preliminary versions with classmates, and you may make suggestions on how other
students might improve their writing. You might also ask to see examples of how your
instructor writes in various versions. You can gain confidence and competence in seeing how
other writers work over the words to create a more perfect piece of writing.
Do you think you can convince anyone that writing is an art to be learned? A skill to be
cultivated? Even more important, are you convinced yourself? Your answer is crucial to your
success in this course. You’ve got to be convinced, beyond a reasonable doubt, of two things.
One, that writing can be learned. Two, that you can learn to be a better writer. Give some
thought to this as you work on the following exercise.

Exercise 1.4

Committing to Becoming a Better Writer


Type a memo of commitment to your instructor. In this memo, note your background as
a writer, and express your goals for this course and affirm your confidence that you can
make progress toward becoming a better writer. This letter should be about a page long.

Writing as an Ongoing Commitment


To become more effective in your writing, you must be in it for the long haul. Good writing
requires consistent effort. The following two exercises are continuing projects that will last
through the entire semester or academic term. Both are designed to help you build a stronger
habit of frequent writing. Select one as an extended assignment.

Exercise 1.5

Creating a Writing Journal


Too many people don’t write unless they have to for school or work, and that lack of
involvement with writing shows. This exercise gives you a lot of freedom, so have fun with
your writing. Develop it as a leisure-time activity and become a better writer in the process.

Turn in to your instructor two pages each week on any topic and in any writing format
that interests you. Or write a weekly entry in your blog. Your writing does not have to be
related to the formats explored in this class. Rather, use this assignment to expand your

continued . . .
12 Part One PRINCIPLES OF EFFECTIVE WRITING

Exercise 1.5 . . . continued


writing horizons by picking topics and formats unrelated to any class you are taking this
term. Here are some ideas for writing topics:

• Write a letter to a cousin you haven’t seen in a while, or to your grandfather.


• Write a poem or song lyrics.
• Set out your thoughts on politics, religion or the state of affairs in the world.
• Write a new ending for an episode of your favorite television show.
• Review a book you recently read or a concert you attended.
• Reminisce about a place you once visited, or speculate about a place you would
like to visit.
• Write a monologue or rant for John Oliver, Rachel Maddow, Bill O’Reilly, Steven
Colbert or some other celebrity commentator.
• Write about a sports figure, entertainer or politician you admire (or dislike).
• Discuss your hopes and dreams for the future or your problems of the present.
• Meditate on the eternal agony in the fires of hell, which await the girl or guy who
dumped you.
• Write dirty limericks if you want to . . . just write!

Exercise 1.6

Developing a Journal of Professional Observations


In this exercise, you will learn to develop a critical eye into your intended profession. Test
your insights in new areas; let your curiosity lead you to poke around previously unexplored
nooks and crannies. Have fun with this assignment as you ponder the public relations
aspects of all that you encounter. You’ll be surprised how useful public relations is in making
sense out of life around you. You’ll also find that the habit of keeping a professional journal
can enhance your writing skills as well as your professional insights.
Write two pages each week about your observations of public relations activities in
everyday life. Situations full of public relations possibilities are all around you—a government
official handling criticism, a charity raising money, a company fighting a corporate takeover,
a Little League team seeking a sponsor, a sorority dealing with pledges, your boss handling
new employees, a military spokesperson fielding press inquiries.

Your observations may come from books or periodicals, news media, events with which
you are familiar, or situations in which you are personally involved. Your instructor may
evaluate your writing on the basis of insight into public relations thought and practice,
cohesive and logical organization, creative thinking and problem solving, and of course,
effective writing.
2 Effective Writing

Too often, people write under the false belief that fancy words and long sentences are
impressive. In reality, this doesn’t impress most people. It’s harder to read and less likely to
be understood and remembered. Rather than trying to impress readers with fancy writing,
public relations practitioners should attempt to make an impression on readers with the quality
of their writing and the importance of their message.
Aim for simple sentences, but remember that simple sentences shouldn’t be simplistic.
Even the most lofty and complex ideas can be—probably should be—expressed using simple,
everyday language. The goal is to make your writing accessible to your readers.
This chapter should remind you of rules and guidelines you already know about making
your writing more effective. These suggestions and guidelines provide a foundation for all
kinds of writing: organizational publications, releases for print and broadcast media, blog
entries, scripts for speeches and text for websites, email and other communication vehicles.
This chapter is subdivided into four sections dealing with standard usage, simple
language, meaningful language and inclusive language. Here are your learning objectives for
Chapter 2:

• To effectively use standard conventions of the English language.


• To construct simple and understandable messages.
• To enhance the meaning your words convey.
• To use language ethically.
• To avoid biased language.

Standard Usage
The aim of public relations writing is to communicate clearly with your target publics. A basic
ingredient in clear communication is correct use of language. This section outlines some of
the standard approaches to syntax—the part of grammar that deals with the orderly arrangement
of words into sentences. Syntax is what makes a sentence make sense.

13
14 Part One PRINCIPLES OF EFFECTIVE WRITING

Exercise 2.1

Knowing the Rules of Standard English


Freewrite on the following topic: What does it matter if I follow the “rules” of standard
English? Discuss this with your classmates.

Usage Tip 1: Rules and Guidelines


The ultimate rule of public relations writing is to write so the reader can understand. How
can you do this? By following the standard and ordinary guidelines of language use, including
the basic rules of good grammar, word choice and common spelling. Using proper English
doesn’t mean making your writing stilted or stale. Occasionally, writers are tempted to bend
a rule of grammar in order to maintain the higher rule of understanding. A lofty goal, perhaps,
but such bending should be done only with understanding and careful consideration, never
out of ignorance of the rules. It is better simply to revise the offending passage so that it is
both understandable and correct.
As a student, begin now to enhance your writing resources. First, get an up-to-date
dictionary (the Associated Press recommends two that are commonly used by reporters:
Webster’s New World College Dictionary and, for more complete information, Webster’s Third
New International Dictionary of the English Language). Buy The New Roget’s Thesaurus and
Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary of Synonyms, and adopt a good contemporary grammar
reference book such as the “Prentice-Hall Handbook for Writers,” Stunk and White’s “Elements
of Style,” or Kessler and McDonald’s “When Words Collide.” Also, have access to a current
edition of The World Almanac and Book of Facts. Once you have accumulated this mini library,
use these resources often.
Correct English requires accurate spelling. There really is little choice here. Poor spelling
signals a writer who isn’t careful, and that will throw suspicion on the accuracy of everything
you write. William Shakespeare sometimes used different spellings for the same word. He
even spelled his own name three different ways. But times have changed, and anyhow—you’re
not Shakespeare. Stick with the appropriate spelling. That’s where a stylebook and a dictionary
can help.
A stylebook is a listing of preferences for spelling, word usages, punctuation and other
elements of writing. It is adopted by a publication or news organization to maintain consist-
ency, which is an important element of effective writing. Public relations writers generally
adopt a stylebook for their internal and external writing on behalf of their organizations and
clients.
The Associated Press Stylebook is by far the most commonly used guide in the United
States. Reuters Stylebook is often used in Canada and other English-speaking nations.
Individual newspapers and magazines often have their own stylebooks, usually based on
the AP Stylebook. For example, see the style manual of National Geographic magazine
(http://stylemanual.natgeo.com).
Public relations writers use dictionaries along with their stylebooks. If the dictionary lists
two acceptable spellings, check the stylebook; one of the alternatives is likely preferred.
2 Effective Writing 15

Appendix A of this book, “Common Sense Stylebook for Public Relations Writers,”
provides the basics of writing style generally consistent with the Associated Press. It is useful
with external materials such as news releases and other writing for newspapers, magazines
and the electronic media. This stylebook also provides some variations for a house style that
can be appropriate for organizational media such as websites, newsletters and other publications,
as well as style adjustments for broadcast media.
The Common Sense Stylebook also is posted at the author’s website: ron-smith.com. Feel
free to use it frequently.

Usage Tip 2: Grammatical Fallacies


Fallacies and urban legend abound about the proper use of English. Shall or will? Who or
whom? That or which? Certainly you need to pay attention to rules, and there is no place in
public relations for sloppy writing.
But be aware that some rules are changing. Some rules weren’t really rules at all, just
denizens of a grammatical netherworld. Some so-called grammatical rules are nothing more
than folderol or bull crap. Calling them old wives’ tales does a disservice to old wives.
Here are some of the most common language structures that can lead to misconceptions,
which all effective writers should ignore:

• Sentence fragments have a purpose and a right to exist. Sometimes. Especially in


speeches, broadcast scripts, blogs and advertising copy.
• “Shall” is close to being listed as an archaic future form of the verb “to be,” as its
older brother “shalt” already is. Not many people use the word precisely. Besides,
for some people the word carries negative connotations from grade school, writing
“I shall not bite the teacher” (100 times). And don’t even think of using its negative
contraction, “shan’t.”
• Sometimes infinitives (the word “to” plus a verb) can be split. Occasionally they
need to be. It would be difficult to improve on Star Trek’s “to boldly go” where no
one has gone before. For 600 years, English writers have been putting adverbs within
an infinitive, precisely to call particular attention to the adverb. So split away, as long
as you want to intentionally emphasize the adverb.
• Not all sentences need a stated subject before the verb. Understood? Of course.
• Some purisms such as agendum, stadia and referenda are falling into disuse. Others
such as datum cause confusion and occasional fights. Your public relations writing
is no place to show off arcane linguistic knowledge. Write words as they are commonly
used.
• Sentences can end in a preposition. Occasionally, it’s something we have to put up
with. Writers of English have been ending sentences with prepositions since the 1300s.
But somewhere alone the way, some misguided grammarians tried to squelch the
practice. Resist the squelchment.
• A double negative may not work well in mathematics. But in language we call this
a litotes ((LY-tuh-teez)), which is a negation of the contrary. We use this figure of
speech to give emphasis through understatement. “I’m not unhappy” is a perfectly
fine sentence. It is a negative statement with attitude, and it doesn’t mean quite the
same as “I’m happy.” But use this form sparingly, and only when it clearly enhances
16 Part One PRINCIPLES OF EFFECTIVE WRITING

your writing. Also, be aware of the signal it sends: “Oh, your new haircut? I don’t
dislike it.” One final point: Be aware that not all double negatives are litotes. “I didn’t
see nothing” isn’t a litotes, it’s just incorrect grammar.
• And it’s OK to begin a sentence with “and” or “but.” But don’t overdo it. FYI: Writers
have been using both words to begin sentences since the 10th century.

Usage Tip 3: Levels of Formality


Effective public relations writers are fluent in operational English (also known as standard
English, or network standard because it is commonly used by television reporters). This is
the version of English most appropriate for professional interaction, such as in business or
education. It is the type of writing you learned in school, and the type you will most likely
be expected to use in your career.
Good writers also know how and when to use some of the many other varieties of English,
a language rich in diversity. English has a formal style, informal versions and many geographic
and cultural variations. Together, these provide much of the beauty and power of the English
language. This variety can be very useful to public relations writers. Position statements and
news releases, for example, generally call for the use of formal and objective language. Appeal
letters and blog entries lend themselves to more informal and personal language.
Some writing is meant to be heard rather than read, and this sometimes calls for a particular
language form. Language drawn from a particular cultural variation like Cajun or rap may
be appropriate for the script of a public service message. For some writers, Creole, Pennsylvania
Dutch or other flavorful regional variations or dialects may be a useful writing tool. The key
is to use the style most appropriate to the particular writing project and the target public and
to carefully pretest to make sure the writing is not offensive or condescending to your readers.

Usage Tip 4: Bulky Sentences


Strive for simplicity. A good sentence should carry only one thought, and its phrases and
clauses should support that thought rather than introduce extraneous information. This is
particularly true when you are preparing a speech or writing a script or release for the
broadcast media, because the audiences will not be able to reread an awkward sentence. Keep
the subject and verb close together, making it easier for the hearer to understand the sentence.

Usage Tip 5: Evolving Usage and Rules


Essayist E.B. White once wrote in The New Yorker magazine that “the living language is like
a cowpath; it is the creation of the cows themselves who, having created it, follow it or depart
from it according to their whim and their needs. From daily use, the path undergoes change.”
Great allusion!
English is indeed a living and changing language. Words come, words go. Some move
in and out of common usage, while others find that their meanings have changed. Something
can be so bad that it’s good, and so cool that it’s hot. The dictionary says that “gay” means
lively and happy, but if you proclaim yourself to be gay today, people probably won’t think
you are referring to your current disposition. Similarly, the word “propaganda” used to be an
accepted synonym for promotion or publicity, but the word has since taken on a negative tone
associated with deception and misleading information.
Another random document with
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Ndindindi ridge, overlooking Insuze valley. No sooner did he reach
the summit than he, and the few men with him at the moment, were
suddenly charged by a company of rebels, up till then concealed
behind rocks. Knobsticks and assegais were flung amidst wild war-
cries. The Carbineers met the charge and killed two or three before
being obliged to fall back on the rest of the squadron. As they fell
back, the two 15-pounders N.F.A. opened fire at about 1,500 yards
and succeeded in dropping a shell in the enemy's midst. Sigananda
afterwards had the insolence to say his men were out looking for
Bambata in obedience to the Commissioner's orders, and to contend
that the Government was the first to begin hostilities in so far as he
and his tribe were concerned. As a matter of fact, Gray had seen
nothing whatever of the Natives before going on to the ridge, nor,
when he got there, did they afford him an opportunity of explaining
how they came to be under arms four or five miles from where it was
commonly known Bambata then was.[180]
On the 3rd, four squadrons made a reconnaissance in the direction of
a deep gorge near the Insuze. Some fifty cattle were being driven into
it as the troops approached, but it was decided not to attempt seizure.
Kraals in the neighbourhood, reputed to belong to rebels, were
destroyed and some sixty cattle, with goats and sheep, captured.
On the same day, strips of white calico, two and a half inches wide,
and similar pieces of Turkey red, were issued to Native loyalists, who
had come in to assist as directed, to enable them to be immediately
distinguished in the field from rebels. These bandages were bound
round the left arm above the elbow, each colour showing plainly. The
device was later on copied by every force employing Native levies.
Subsequently this useful badge was worn also round the head, it
being feared that, especially when driving a bush or forest, it could
not be readily enough seen when bound round the arm.
The Northern District Mounted Rifles (Major J. Abraham) joined the
Z.M.R. near Ntingwe during the day.
Further reconnaissances in force were made by Mackay on the 4th
and 5th May, with the object of ascertaining the enemy's strength,
without, however, engaging him. On the latter date, as the column
was returning to Empandhleni from Nomangci, a few rebels fired on
the rear-guard from a distance of about 900 yards. As it was getting
late, they were not engaged, particularly as it was impossible to see
them as they were behind stones. On one exposing himself full-
length, however, and challenging the troops to "come on," he was
fired at, when he promptly decamped. It was ascertained during the
reconnaissance that a stone wall, about three feet high, had been
erected that day across the main road to the forest, with the object,
as afterwards transpired, of impeding any advance to, or retreat from,
Mansel at Fort Yolland.
Intelligence was received on the 3rd of the death of Mr. Herbert
Munro Stainbank, Magistrate of Mahlabatini district,[181] who had
been foully murdered the same evening in Chief Ngobozana's ward,
on the right bank of the White Umfolozi river, and beside the public
road. He had left the magistracy on the 2nd with his wife and child (in
arms), a lady companion and two European police, in a mule trolley
to collect taxes from Ngobozana's tribe. His party also included nine
Native men and two Native servant girls. "The camp was pitched on
the south bank of the White Umfolozi, about 200 yards from the drift
to the east of the main road leading to Melmoth."[182] Mr. Stainbank
had selected the site so as to be near the telephone, and so in touch
with the Commissioner at Empandhleni. "On the 3rd instant,
Ngobozana's tribe assembled and paid hut and dog tax, but it does
not appear to have been a successful collection from a financial point
of view, as only £184 18s. was collected in hut tax, whereas the tribe
are responsible for about £270. The collection ended at about 2 p.m.
and the Natives dispersed. Ngobozana is said to have presented Mr.
Stainbank with two sheep for slaughter, but he declined to accept
them, saying that Ngobozana could afford more than that....
Ngobozana took back the sheep and said he would bring a beast
next day.... About 7 p.m. that evening, Mr. Stainbank spoke on the
telephone, then returned to his evening meal, and, at about 7.50
p.m., he went to the telephone, accompanied by Tprs. Sells and
Martin.... He had a lantern and, after connecting his telephone
instrument, he got into a squatting position, Tpr. Sells seating himself
about two yards away leaning against the telephone pole, and Tpr.
Martin squatting close by Mr. Stainbank's left side; about 7.55 p.m.
Mr. Stainbank rang the telephone bell, and was waiting for a reply,
with the receiver to his ear, when suddenly a shot was fired, and Mr.
Stainbank exclaimed, 'My God, I am shot!' and fell over on his left
side, then a second shot was fired, striking Tpr. Sells, and shortly
after a third shot was fired, also striking Sells."[183] Sells and Martin,
as well as the rest of the party, escaped, but Stainbank died on the
journey back from hæmorrhage and shock. The camp was left
standing, including the safe, also two guns and ammunition. On
returning the following day, the money and camp were found intact.
Chief Nqodi, living in the vicinity, was directed to turn his men out and
protect the magistracy.
Mr. J.Y. Gibson, one of the senior Magistrates of the Colony, with a
considerable experience of Zululand affairs, was now appointed at
Mahlabatini. He assumed duty on the 13th. Much trouble was taken
by him to discover the murderers.
After being informed by the Commissioner of what had happened,
Dinuzulu expressed the greatest indignation and grief. He begged to
be allowed to assist in bringing the criminals to justice, and asked
permission to send Mankulumana at once to Mahlabatini with twenty
or thirty picked men to do all he could. The offer was accepted.
Several arrests were subsequently made, and the prisoners, after
lengthy examination, were brought to trial, but acquitted. The
occurrence was for long enveloped in mystery. We shall return to the
subject when dealing with similar murders that occurred chiefly after
the conclusion of the Rebellion.
Barely a week after the foregoing murder, a Native Mnqandi, of the
tribe of Matshana ka Mondise, when on a visit to Usutu kraal, was
found with his throat cut, though still alive, near the boundary of
Dinuzulu's ward. He is generally believed to have been assaulted in
this murderous manner whilst within the said ward.
FOOTNOTES:
[172] It was probably after this forest that Tshaka named his great
kraal Dukuza, whose site was exactly where the town of Stanger
now stands.
[173] The Natives of Zululand and Natal may be divided into three
great ethnic groups: amaLala, abeNguni and amaNtungwa. Of
these, the amaLala or Lalas were probably the earliest settlers,
followed by the abeNguni, and then the amaNtungwa. The last two
have been in the country for at least 350 years. The amaLala are
now to be found chiefly in Natal proper.
[174] A Zulu idiom signifying burial.
[175] Undisturbed in any way, as required by custom, the grave
was found by the troops in 1906, to be overgrown with grass and
weeds. There was around it a grove, some 200 yards in length
and oval in shape. Immediately round the grove was a rough fence
of Kaffir-boom trees. None of the trees in the plantation were more
than 25 feet high. Owing to the grass not having been burnt or cut,
it was naturally infested with snakes, among which, it was
believed, was that (i.e. spirit) of the departed monarch. As, year by
year, the grass in the vicinity was burnt, it devolved on the care-
taker to make a 10-foot fire-break round the grove by digging away
the grass. The grave consisted of a mound, 12 feet long by 10 feet
broad and 15 inches high. On top of it lay one or two broken
kambas (clay pots without handles), and parts of the original ox-
waggon.
[176] This officer (Brev. Lieut.-Col. B.M.R.) had served as follows:
South African War, 1878-9—Zulu Campaign. Medal with clasp.
South African War, 1899-1902—Operations in Natal, 1899,
including actions at Rietfontein and Lombard's Kop. Defence of
Ladysmith, including sortie of 7th December, 1899, and action of
6th January, 1900; operations in Natal, March to June, 1900,
including action at Laing's Nek; operations in the Transvaal, east
of Pretoria, July to October, 1900.
In command, West Australian Mounted Infantry—Operations in the
Transvaal and Orange River Colony, 30th November, 1900, to 31st
May, 1902; operations on the Zululand Frontier of Natal in
September and October, 1901.
Despatches, London Gazette, 17th and 25th April, 1902, and 4th
December, 1903. Queen's medal with four clasps. C.M.G.; D.S.O.
The Official Army List, Wyman & Sons, London, 1911.
[177] Cd. 3027, 1906, p. 12.
[178] Son of the late loyal Chief Zibebu.
[179] The convoy found the Buffalo River full and experienced
trouble in fording the waggons. Every precaution was taken when
travelling in Zululand. A lager was formed each night with the
waggons, and a light barbed-wire fence erected 50 yards
therefrom. The force stood to arms at 4 a.m. every day.
[180] The rebels occupied a position from which every movement
by Mackay's force, ever since it left the magistracy, could be
plainly seen. They, moreover, had two other outlooks which were
visible from the magistracy.
[181] This is the district whose Chiefs had, but a few days before,
offered their services against Bambata and Sigananda.
[182] Cd. 3027, p. 67.
[183] Cd. 3027, p. 67.
X.
MOBILIZATION OF ZULULAND FIELD FORCE.—MANSEL
ENGAGES THE ENEMY AT BOBE.
The news that Sigananda had, with practically the whole of his tribe,
together with sections of two other adjoining tribes, espoused
Bambata's cause, commonly said at the time to have Dinuzulu's full
support, had hardly been made public before offers of substantial
assistance were received from the Cape Colony and the Transvaal.
The Prime Minister of the former telegraphed on the 17th April:
"Extremely sorry to hear of your further Native trouble; can we be of
assistance, you may depend on our ready help in anything that it is
possible for us to undertake." The reply was: "Many thanks for your
telegram. Should assistance be necessary, we shall not hesitate to
ask your help."
On the 23rd April, the following message was received from the
Lieutenant-Governor of the Transvaal (Sir Richard Solomon,
G.C.M.G., K.C.B.)[184]: "Please inform your Ministers that, with the
High Commissioner's warmest approval, Transvaal Government
offers to send to assistance of Government of Natal, whenever
required, 500 Transvaal Volunteers fully armed and equipped, and
offers to maintain them while in the field." To this the following reply
was sent: "Ministers beg to express their very grateful thanks for the
most generous offer made by the Transvaal Government, which they
gladly accept. They beg me to assure your Government that they
highly appreciate the spirit which has prompted this offer." On the
25th it was added: "The regiment we have offered will be a mounted
one, and will be kept up to its full strength."
The Prime Minister, Cape Colony, wired again: "I have thought that
possibly a battery of six Maxim guns, fully equipped and manned by
Cape Mounted Riflemen, might be of service to you in the present
campaign. Government, Cape Colony, willing therefore to place these
at your disposal, fully manned, equipped and with pack saddles and
mules, of course free of all cost to your Government. Should you be
short of signallers, we can also supply them fully equipped. I merely
make these special suggestions as a part of my original offer of
general assistance." To this it was replied: "We are deeply grateful for
the repetition of your generous offer of assistance, but are advised
that at present we have sufficient forces in the field to deal with the
Rebellion in Zululand. We shall certainly avail ourselves of your offer
should the insurrection spread to other parts of the Colony."
On the 8th June, the Government, referring to the foregoing, asked
the Cape Government for a battery of six Maxim guns. Within a week,
the guns, fully manned and equipped, under the command of Captain
M. Humphery, C.M.R., together with twenty signallers, under
Lieutenant R. Stopford, C.M.R., were in Natal and proceeded at once
to take the field.
The offer of the Transvaal having been accepted, it became
necessary for that Colony to issue a proclamation, in which, inter alia,
it was made known that, as it was "desirable in the interests of this
Colony, that a Volunteer Corps, formed under the Volunteer Corps
Ordinance, 1904, should be called out for service in this Colony, and
in the said Colony of Natal," and as the Lieutenant-Governor of the
Transvaal had "accepted the service of certain persons desiring to be
formed into a Volunteer Corps," and such Corps had been lawfully
formed and designated the First Transvaal Mounted Rifles, therefore
the said Corps "shall be and is hereby required to serve within this
Colony or in the said Colony of Natal."
The formation of the corps, 500 strong, took effect as from 26th April.
It was placed under the command of Lieut.-Col. William Frank Barker,
[185] with Captain Walter Jardine as Adjutant.

Great care was taken in the selection of the other officers, non-
commissioned officers and men. It was decided to accept volunteers
from several existing mounted volunteer corps, in order that each
such unit should participate in the campaign. The corps was
accordingly constituted as follows:
Officers. W.O.'s,
N.C.O.'s
and
Men
A Squadron, Imperial
7 99
Light Horse
B " South
5 87
African Light Horse
C "
Johannesburg
8 122
Mounted Rifles and
Scottish Horse
D " Northern,
Eastern, and Western, 5 82
Mounted Rifles
Maxim gun,
Searchlight, Transport
4 15
and Medical
Detachments
Regimental Staff 4 5
— —
33 410
Hon. Capt. J. Peet, J.M.R., was appointed Quarter-master, and Lieut.
W. Bruce, Western Mounted Rifles, Signalling Officer.
The unit was mobilized on the 25th April, 1906. Notwithstanding the
fact that many difficulties had to be contended with,[186] the T.M.R.
left Johannesburg for Dundee, complete in every detail, on the 26th.
The mobilization had been carried out in a most effective manner and
with such speed by Colonel C.J. Briggs, Commandant of the
Transvaal Volunteers, Major M.C. Rowland, Controller and
Paymaster, also officers, n.c.o.'s and men connected with the supply
of arms and equipment, clothing, transport, pay, etc., as well as Major
J.W.F. Lamont, R.F.A., Chief Staff Officer, Transvaal Volunteers, that
the corps was obliged for several days to await orders at Dundee.
In addition to all the expenses being defrayed by the Transvaal
Government, the corps drew all supplies, except rations in the field,
from the Transvaal Volunteer Headquarters, Johannesburg.

The Natal Ministers received throughout the Rebellion the fullest


support, as well as sound practical advice, from the Governor (who
happened to be a Colonel in the Imperial army). Finding that the
situation at Nkandhla had assumed a much graver aspect by reason
of Sigananda's unexpected defection, they resolved to grapple with
the problem on lines commensurate with its scope and magnitude.
The plan of at once driving through the districts contiguous or
adjacent to that of Nkandhla was adopted. In carrying it out, the
Northern District Mounted Rifles were to advance from Babanango;
Royston's Horse and the Transvaal Mounted Rifles from
Empandhleni Magistracy; and the Natal Police Field Force, with a
strong detachment of the Durban Light Infantry, from Fort Yolland.
The drifts over the Tugela were to be guarded by the Umvoti Mounted
Rifles, whilst a strong force of the Natal Carbineers was to be
stationed at Helpmakaar to keep a powerful Chief Kula in check on
the drive taking place.
The Active Militia were, at the same time, mobilized throughout Natal;
many of the units, however, remained at their respective
headquarters to keep the Natives in check during the proposed
movements. The First Reserves in various towns and districts were
also mobilized, as it was not impossible that the Natives, seeing so
large a body of troops had crossed into Zululand, might rise and
attempt to massacre women and children. Much of the intelligence
received at this time was believed to indicate that a coup of that kind
was being contemplated.
The moment had arrived when the possibility of a universal rising in
Zululand, as well as in Natal, had to be faced and provided against. If
one Chief, without specific grievance of his own, was ready to
associate himself with those who had taken up arms against the
Government, it was probable others would do the same on a fitting
opportunity arising. As for the rest of the Native population, it seemed
certain that an isolated Chief here and there would remain loyal with
his people, though the great bulk would watch events and go with the
tide whichever way it happened to flow. The Chief's personality,
however, was not the material factor, for, owing to various reasons
which need not be set forth here, his influence, in many cases, had
been so undermined, that members of his tribe remained loyal or not
to him as it happened to suit their individual fancy. The result was,
that although the majority, or even the whole tribe, decided to rebel,
the Chief would personally attach himself to the Government. Thus,
the mere fact of his professing to be loyal was no guarantee whatever
that the tribe would follow his example. Generally speaking, his
influence proved too weak to prevent a few and sometimes many of
his best fighting men from joining the rebels. This was the state of
affairs in many directions, especially in Zululand and the eastern
parts of Natal, and defections would have gone on to a greater extent
than they did, until every tribal unit had been 'hollowed out,' had not
the Government at this critical moment acted as vigorously and
comprehensively as it did.
Colonel (now Brigadier-General Sir Duncan) McKenzie, who had
been in command of the column that operated in the south-western
portions of Natal, was placed in command of the combined forces,
including the Transvaal Mounted Volunteers and the section of the
Natal Police called out for active service in Zululand. His appointment
took effect on the 28th.
COLONEL (now BRIGADIER-GENERAL) SIR DUNCAN McKENZIE,
K.C.M.G., C.B., V.D.
The composition and strength of the command, designated the
"Zululand Field Force," will be found in Appendices III. and IV. The
troops under Leuchars, who remained in Natal, appear in the same
Appendices.
The position of Chief Staff Officer was conferred on Colonel Sir A.
Woolls-Sampson, K.C.B., of the Transvaal.[187] The other Staff
appointments were made by McKenzie from the force under his
command.
The Commissioner for Native Affairs was appointed Political Agent,
with authority to represent and act for the Governor and Supreme
Chief under martial law in all political matters that might have to be
dealt with summarily in Zululand. He was empowered to enquire into
the conduct of Chiefs, tribes or Natives who had received and
harboured Bambata, or otherwise assisted him, or committed crimes
requiring to be summarily disposed of, with the object of suppressing
the Rebellion, and to award such punishment as was fitting, provided
that all cases, in which sentence in excess of two years'
imprisonment was passed, were referred to the Governor for
confirmation.
McKenzie proceeded to Dundee on the 30th, and assumed command
of his force on the following morning.[188]
The column at Dundee left that place on the morning of the 3rd May,
with a convoy of 150 ox-waggons loaded with provisions. The route
followed was Laffnie's Drift, Nqutu, Fort Louis and Itala. As the roads
and drifts were poor, progress was slow. Wherever a halt was made
for the night a square lager was formed by means of the waggons.
The country traversed was found almost deserted. Newly-made
assegais were discovered at a few kraals in Zululand. The magistracy
at Empandhleni was reached on the 8th.

Whilst this column was on the march, developments of an important


nature were occurring on the south-eastern side of the Nkandhla
forests, resulting in the first serious encounter with the enemy's
forces, then, as has been seen, made up of men of Bambata,
Sigananda, Ndube, and Mpumela's tribes. By this time, a number of
men of other tribes had also joined.
When Mansel reached Fort Yolland on the 29th April (11 a.m.), he
found Capt. W. Alexander, D.L.I., had already come in from Eshowe
with a convoy of waggons escorted by a company of D.L.I. and a
troop of N.M.R. The convoy had narrowly escaped an ambuscade, no
doubt devised by the raiders from Nkandhla to be referred to later.
It so happened that Chief Ndube, after having turned his men out to
capture Bambata as directed by the Magistrate, and after
subsequently receiving an order from Mr. Saunders prohibiting entry
of Sigananda's ward until Mansel had arrived to take charge of the
operations, lost many members of his tribe by their becoming rebels,
primarily, it would seem, to ensure their stock from being looted by
Bambata. Bambata and his allies were, at the time, held in check by
nothing whatsoever. They were able to raid and range about over
wide expanses of country occupied by people as loyal as could be
expected. These raids had already taken place in Ndube's ward,
followed by others in those of Makubalo and Mfungelwa. Ndube's
men, therefore, were obliged to face the alternative, either of being
killed outright and losing their stock whilst remaining loyal to a
Government which had, up till then, been unable to give them
support, or to join the rebels and, at any rate for the time being, save
everything. It is not surprising the latter alternative was seized by
many. Terrorization of this kind is one of the principal, though not
sufficiently considered reasons, why Bambata was able so speedily
to mass together the formidable force he did. With his men melting
away hourly, Ndube perceived he could no longer remain loyal
without serious risk to his own life and property. He reported what had
happened to Leuchars at Krantzkop, and asked for advice. Leuchars
told him to move off with his cattle and the loyal portion of the tribe if
he felt in danger. He accordingly fled to Eshowe with a number of
followers on the night of the 22nd, whilst some of the women took
refuge in Natal, near the Tugela. Many of his people drove their stock
into Mfungelwa's ward, which adjoins that of Ndube on the east.
These cattle and others belonging to Mfungelwa's people were what
Sigananda and Bambata's men raided on the night of the 28th and
following morning. A number of the owners, who happened to be
dissociated from the Ndube-ites, followed the raiders back to
Nkandhla and pleaded for the restoration of their stock. In many
cases, the applications were granted, the cattle being returned after a
forfeit of one large beast per herd had been levied, "owing to its
having set foot on ground in the hallowed vicinity of the grave." The
decision to raid at that moment was probably precipitated by
knowledge of the fact that Mansel was moving to Fort Yolland.
An amusing incident occurred about this time. Mfungelwa had been
directed that, should Bambata be seen attempting a further raid, all it
was necessary to do was to raise a white flag on a hill near his kraal,
a couple of miles from, and within view of, the camp. This would be
taken as an alarm, when assistance would be rendered. On the
following Wednesday, the flag was observed hoisted early in the
morning. The whole force, numbering 350, stood to arms and moved
out at a smart pace to engage the enemy. Upon coming up to the flag
and clamouring for particulars as to the whereabouts of the raiders,
Mfungelwa quietly replied that there was no enemy—in setting up the
flag, he had done so merely as an experiment, it appearing desirable
to rehearse the part he had to play in case of actual necessity!
The rebel scouts exposed themselves daily on Komo hill, some five
miles to the north-west; from this point, the movements of the troops
at Fort Yolland were easily perceivable. A reconnaissance was
accordingly made to Mfanefile's store at Maqonga, some three miles
south of Komo, when general information as to the rebels and the
country they were in was obtained.
By way of checking the enemy's encroachments, Mansel decided to
make another reconnaissance, this time in force and towards Komo.
He moved out at 6 a.m. on the 5th, each man taking two days' rations
and 150 rounds of ammunition. Komo was reached at 9 a.m. After an
hour's halt, Mansel decided to descend, viâ Sibudeni peak, into the
valley lying to the immediate south of the Nkandhla forests. This
valley, or rather series of valleys, was known to be in the occupation
of the enemy; such area (including the grave) being, indeed, their
headquarters.
As the intention was simply to make a reconnaissance, it was
deemed unnecessary for it to be governed by any definite, pre-
conceived plan. Hence the commanding officer, when he started from
Komo, did not issue instructions as to what his objective was. Thus
the men were marched through parts of the forest at Sibudeni and
into the valley to a point within three or four miles of the rebel
headquarters, without any clear conception as to what was to be
done on getting within striking distance. The movement, as will
presently be seen, proved an extremely hazardous one.
The strength of the force and its order of march, on leaving Komo,
was: 30 Mounted Infantry, D.L.I., with 20 N.M.R. (Major S.G.
Campbell); 86 Nongqai (Z.N.P.) (Major C. Fairlie); 200 Natal Police;
80 Natal Naval Corps (Commander F. Hoare); 80 D.L.I. (Capt. R.L.
Goulding), and a levy of about 400 men, armed with shields and
assegais (Chief Mfungelwa). Total: 410 Europeans, 86 Zululand
Native Police, 400 Native Contingent. Of the Europeans, 250 were
mounted, 160 unmounted; the Native forces were almost entirely
unmounted.
Passing Sibudeni store (looted, it will be remembered, some days
previously by the rebels), the road entered a small portion of the
forests. Here fresh meat was discovered, with signs of a fire near by.
Three or four assegais, too, with small rags attached containing
medicine of some sort, were seen, stuck in the ground by the rebels
in accordance with their superstitious ideas.
Progress now became slow, owing to occasional sniping by rebels
concealed in the bush. Those who were riding dismounted and
proceeded in half-sections, each man leading his horse. The Nongqai
extended a few yards into the forest on either side. The infantry, after
fixing bayonets, marched in single file on either edge of the track,
officers in the centre. By the time the open country that forms the
summit of a ridge called Bobe was reached, the infantry, owing to the
heat and absence of water, were beginning to show signs of fatigue.
After a halt, to give the rear time to close up, the force descended by
a footpath into the valley referred to, moving in single file.
The head of the column, keeping the footpath, passed on through
neck marked C on the plan to knolls D and E. Another halt of about
half an hour was made on the western slope of E.
During the interval, thirty mounted men were sent to burn a kraal
(Mlibo's) a few yards off on the left. Lieut. A.H.G. Blamey, with a few
N.M.R., then advanced to knoll F to reconnoitre. The time was about
3 p.m. Moving up the eastern incline, and when about 350 yards from
the base of E, the scouts came upon about 300 rebels lying perdu
among the weeds and grass of an old garden, a hundred yards to the
right of the path. They were not seen until they simultaneously rose to
charge. As they got up, they shouted "Usutu! Usutu!" at the top of
their voices, and dashed at the scouts who, after quickly dismounting
and firing a few shots, fell back to the rest of the guard and Nongqai
at E as best they could. At the first shot, the Nongqai immediately
lined themselves in regular order on the right, along a contour of E
about half-way down the hill, and, with the N.M.R. and mounted
infantry—the latter having galloped up from the kraal they were
burning on hearing the fire and ranged themselves on the left—
opened a heavy fusillade on the enemy as he came rushing through
a hail of bullets, the bullets which up till that moment he believed
would not 'enter.' Each ran stoopingly with shield before his face, as if
trying to ward off the bullets, whilst a tshokobezi badge tossed wildly
about his head. They came on with great dash, directing their attack
mainly at the left front of the position. It was at that point that most of
them fell. In one or two instances, the Nongqai, who behaved with
conspicuous coolness and pluck, were obliged to resort to their
bayonets.
Finding themselves beaten at the first rush, they broke, large
numbers making down the steep and slightly wooded watercourses
on either side of the kraal marked "Manyunda." Another section
disappeared down the northern slopes that converge at F, where they
concealed themselves, in the vicinity of Nkunzana river. A number
were shot as they ran, especially on the south-western slopes.
The Natal Police, when the action began, were quickly pushed up to
support at D, about 300 yards from E, from where a heavy and
effective fire proceeded for the few moments the enemy was visible.
The Navals and the D.L.I. came forward on hearing the fire. The
former, at the time, were on the Bobe side of the neck leading to D,
i.e. at B, some few yards up the incline. From such position, a Maxim
they had with them opened at long range, proving effective. The
D.L.I., still further up Bobe at A, being rear-guard, did not come into
action at this stage.
BOBE

Scale of yards
0 100 200 400 600 800

REFERENCE

A, B, C, &c., see text


Footpath Native kraal
Route taken by troops
Nkandla forests lie on immediate right and right front of the map
After the rebels had dispersed, the column moved forward and began
to close up about 300 yards west of F. Suddenly another body of
rebels, about 400 strong, was seen moving up the Nkunzana, as if
making for the rear of the rear-guard, and therefore attempting a
belated encircling movement. Possibly Mansel's extraordinarily long
column and its abnormally slow progress, was the reason why the
enemy's attack on the rear-guard failed as it did. The front impi had
come into action before the rear one (owing to the very high ground
Mansel's rear-guard was still descending) could attempt the usual
enveloping tactics. As this body reached a kraal on the north side of
Bobe, it was joined by a company that had been scouting for some
days on Nomangci and which, hearing the fire, had come unsolicited
to help. The impi then advanced towards the rear-guard (D.L.I.). Not
many minutes before, the officer in charge of the guard had had
occasion to send Mfungelwa and his force to capture stock and burn
kraals on the left, consequently he was under the impression the
Natives he saw were the Native contingent, until, examining with
field-glasses, he noticed that none wore the usual Turkey-red and
calico badge. The enemy was thereupon fired into by the guard and
N.N.C.; without charging, although firing a few shots, he broke and
disappeared down the slopes up which he had just come.
The column again moved on, only to turn sharp left to cross the
Halambu still further below. The enemy followed. The rear-guard was
now supported by mounted men, who, firing on the impi in the
direction of F, were themselves fired on from the Nkunzana by
eighteen rebels stationed at that point. After pretending to move on to
join the column at Halambu, the mounted men suddenly returned
and, finding the rebels in force in the open at short range, shot down
a number. Still another section showed themselves near Nkolotshane
hill, about two miles off to the south-west. They opened ineffectively
at long range.
It was now late in the afternoon. Owing to the exhausted condition of
the men, the desirability of camping on the left side of Halambu was
considered, but, because of the long, dry tambookie grass
thereabout, which could easily have been set alight, and to most of
the ammunition being spent, Mansel decided to make for Fort
Yolland.
Needless to say, the return march, with the infantry in so exhausted a
condition, was extremely difficult. Nor was this to be wondered at.
They had already walked twenty miles over rough country, in heavy
order.
The enemy dogged the troops for miles, constantly sniping at them in
the moonlight: nor did he desist until the main road near Mfanefile's
store had been fairly reached. Some of the infantry did not get to
camp until midnight.
The reconnaissance was carried out in an apparently loose and
irregular manner. Absence of plan has already been noticed. This
omission, with the enemy known to be massed in the vicinity of
Cetshwayo's grave, was evidently an error of judgment. Conducted
as the reconnaissance presumably was with the object of acquiring
information, it actually obtained none that was not already known.
Although two days' rations were carried, no decision was come to as
to where the column should camp for the night. This involved taking
heavily-laden infantry over abnormally long and difficult tracts of
country, so much so that it was owing only to their sterling qualities
and perseverance that they were able to march as they did. When the
first attack had been repulsed, there was an oversight in not pursuing
and severely punishing the rebels. Had this been done, it might have
had something of the demoralizing effect that the Mome had later on.
All units and ranks behaved with much gallantry, repelling attacks that
might easily have proved calamitous.
The principal meed of praise must be awarded to the N.M.R., M. Inf.,
D.L.I., and last, though not least, the Nongqai, owing to whose
coolness and steadiness, the first and principal success was mainly
due.
When Blamey and his troop were obliged to fall back, a number of the
horses would not let the men mount, consequently with the enemy in
hot pursuit 100 yards away, they had to make off on foot. "My horse,"
says Blamey, "would not let me put my foot in the stirrup, so I vaulted
into the saddle. On turning the horse round, two rebels threw their
assegais at me. I shot one and then galloped off." He had not gone
far, however, before he came across Corpl. Acutt on foot, whose rifle
had jammed. The man managed to fire and then took to his heels, the
leading rebel five to ten yards in rear. Whilst on the gallop, Blamey,
catching Acutt up, offered him his stirrup-leather to hold on to; instead
of seizing it, the man put up his arm, asking for help. On this, Blamey,
dropping his revolver, grabbed the arm and, dragging the man over
the saddle with much difficulty, rejoined the troop at E.
The casualties were: Among the rebels, sixty to seventy killed, with
many wounded; among the troops, none killed; one N.M.R. slightly
wounded; one Z.N.P. severely wounded and another wounded.
Seven horses were also wounded.
Mfungelwa's men took no part in the fighting, though they captured
300 cattle and many goats, besides destroying several rebel kraals.
The impi that first attacked at F was made up of Mavalana,
Hayelwengwenya, Felapakati, and Mbokodwebomvu regiments, the
first-named being the youngest and of an average age of 20 to 23. It
was Mavalana that led and threatened most at E. The body that
advanced up the Nkunzana and threatened the rear-guard, was
under the personal command of Bambata. The eighteen who had
guns were commanded by Ndabaningi, Sigananda's principal son,
who, though considerately wearing a white shirt, escaped being hit.
All the enemy's shooting was bad. Those seen near the hill
Nkolotshana late in the afternoon, were merely elderly men who had
congregated from various kraals. Altogether about 1,000 of the
enemy were seen during the day.

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