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DEVELOPING
HELPING SKILLS
A Step-by-Step Approach to Competency
Third Edition
Valerie Nash Chang Carol L. Decker Sheryn T. Scott

Indiana University Indiana University Azusa Pacific University
Australia • Brazil • Mexico • Singapore • United Kingdom • United States
Developing Helping Skills: A Step-by-Step © 2018, 2013 Cengage Learning
Approach to Competency, Third edition
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Printed in the United States of America

Print Number: 01 Print Year: 2016
“To our clients, our students, our colleagues, our families, and our friends;
we have learned so much from each of you.”
CONTRIBUTING AUTHORS
Chapter 1, Importance of Self-Understanding

Influence of Culture, Race, and Ethnicity Khadija Khaja
Influence of Gender Kathy Lay
Influence of Sexual Orientation Kathy Lay
Influence of Socioeconomic Status Carolyn Gentle-Genitty
Influence of Spirituality and Religion Sabrina Williamson Sullenberger
Influence of Life Stages Carolyn Gentle-Genitty
Influence of Family of Origin Kathy Lay
Influence of Disability and Ability Stephan Viehweg
Chapter 2, Ways of Understanding and Perceiving Self and Others

Case Study: Hector and His Family Thomas L. Moore
The Resilience Perspective Mulunesh Abebe Alebachew
The Dual Perspective Carol Hostetter
Chapter 3, Values, Ethics, and Legal Obligations

Technology and Ethics Takiya Paicely
Legal Obligations Heather A. McCabe
Cases in the Instructor’s Manual

Bill: Are you saying she’s going to die? Susan Charlesworth
John: Where do I fit in? Phyllis Shea
Buddy comes home. Sabrina Williamson
The 10th Street community comes together. Carolyn Gentle-Genitty
Tony: I want to live at home. Sabrina Williamson
CONTENTS
PREFACE xvii
INTRODUCTION: THE TEACHING-LEARNING SYSTEM xxv

Reading xxvi
Thinking and Writing xxvi
Watching and Discussing xxvi
Working with Cases xxvi
Working in Task Groups xxvii
Practicing xxviii
Evaluating xxviii
SECTION 1 FOUNDATION 1
CHAPTER 1 Understanding Yourself and Others 3

Influences on Personal Development 4
Homework Exercise 1.1 Understanding Your Personal Belief System 5
Influence of Culture, Race, and Ethnicity 5
Culture’s Influence on the Practitioner 6
Homework Exercise 1.2 Culture, Race, Ethnicity, and Values 7
Homework Exercise 1.3 Your Cultural Beliefs 8
Culture’s Influence on Clients 8
Influences of the Dominant Culture 9
Homework Exercise 1.4 Benefits for Dominant Groups 10
Influence of Gender 10
Homework Exercise 1.5 Gender Influences 11
Influence of Sexual Orientation 11
Homework Exercise 1.6 Sexual Orientation Influences 13
Influence of Socioeconomic Status 13
Homework Exercise 1.7 Socioeconomic Class 14
Influence of Spirituality and Religion 14
Homework Exercise 1.8 The Influence of Religion or Spirituality 15
Influence of Life Stages 16
Homework Exercise 1.9 Life Stages 18
Influence of Family of Origin 18
Homework Exercise 1.10 Influences of Your Family Background 19
Homework Exercise 1.11 Your Family’s Ways of Coping 20
vii
viii Contents
Influence of Disability and Ability 20

Homework Exercise 1.12 Your View of Disabilities 22
Influence of Stress and Demands 22
24
Homework Exercise 1.13 Influence of Stress and Demands
Influence of Your View of Self and Others 24
Homework Exercise 1.14 Self-Understanding 24
Apply and Demonstrate Practice Exercise 1: Reflection and Self-Understanding 25
Summary 25
CHAPTER 2 Ways of Understanding and Perceiving Self and Others 27

The Constructivist Perspective 29
Defining the Constructivist Perspective 29
Personal and Social Constructs 29
Homework Exercise 2.1 Social Constructionist 30
Homework Exercise 2.2 Your Constructs of Self, others, and the World 31
Applying the Constructivist Perspective 31
Homework Exercise 2.3 Identifying Constructs 32
Family Systems 32
Homework Exercise 2.4 Family Systems 33
Applying the Family Systems Perspective 33
The Ecological Perspective 34
Defining the Ecological Perspective 34
Ecological Perspective Concepts 34
Applying the Ecological Perspective 35
Homework Exercise 2.5 Ecological Perspective 36
The Strengths Perspective 37
Defining the Strengths Perspective 37
Applying the Strengths Perspective 38
Homework Exercise 2.6 Strengths 38
Homework Exercise 2.7 Strengths and Challenges 39
The Resilience Perspective 39
Table 2.1 List of Protective Factors Across Four Ecosystem Levels 41
Applying the Resilience Perspective 42
Homework Exercise 2.8 Your Response to a Life Challenge 43
The Empowerment Perspective 43
Defining the Empowerment Perspective 43
Homework Exercise 2.9 Understanding Empowerment 44
Applying the Empowerment Perspective 44
The Dual Perspective 44
Defining the Dual Perspective 44
Applying the Dual Perspective 46
Table 2.2 Theories of Human Behavior 47
Apply and Demonstrate Practice Exercise 2: Using the Perspectives
in the Assessment Process 49
Summary 50
CHAPTER 3 Values, Ethics, and Legal Obligations 51

Personal Values 52
Homework Exercise 3.1 Your Values 53
Professional Values 53
Ethical Standards 54
Contents ix
Professional Competency and Integrity 54

Homework Exercise 3.2 Values and Ethnicity? 56
Technology and Ethics 56
Confidentiality 58
Stigma 58
Moral Obligation and Modeling 58
Technology and Confidentiality 58
Prohibition of Boundary Violations 59
Homework Exercise 3.3 Analyzing Potential Multiple Relationships 61
Personal Relationships that Predate the Professional Relationship 61
Homework Exercise 3.4 Responding to Friends 61
Multiple Relationships during the Professional Relationship 62
Sexual Relationships 63
Multiple Relationships Following the End of Professional Relationships 63
Homework Exercise 3.5 What to Say to a Client Who Asks You to Go to Lunch 64
Behaviors with Boundary Implications 64
Homework Exercise 3.6 Gift-Giving 65
Homework Exercise 3.7 Boundary Issues Discussed in Codes of Ethics 65
Assessment 65
Informed Consent 66
Homework Exercise 3.8 Informed Consent 66
Legal Obligations 66
Ethical Violations and Licensing 66
Duties to Clients 67
Legal Limits of Confidentiality 68
Civil Legal Challenges 68
Minimizing Risk of Ethical and Legal Challenges 69
Homework Exercise 3.9 Legal Conflicts 69
Ethical Decision Making 70
Homework Exercise 3.10 Using Beneficence and Nonmaleficence 70
ETHIC Model of Decision Making 70
Homework Exercise 3.11 Ethic Model of Decision Making 71
Apply and Demonstrate Practice Exercise 3: Read the Following Scenario 72
Summary 72
CHAPTER 4 Professionalism and Professional Relationships 73

Acting in a Professional Manner 74
Homework Exercise 4.1 Communicating with Honesty and Sensitivity 76
Professional Roles 77
Advocating for Change 78
Homework Exercise 4.2 Your Role in Advocacy 79
Developing a Professional Identity 79
Homework Exercise 4.3 Explaining Your Discipline to a Client 80
Maintaining Respectful, Productive Relationships with Colleagues 80
Homework Exercise 4.4 Different Approaches to a Client 81
Using Supervision and Consultation 81
Engaging in Career-Long Learning 82
Homework Exercise 4.5 Using Technology in Career Long Learning 83
Unique Nature of Professional Relationships 83
Table 4.1, Characteristics of Different Types of Relationships 85
Homework Exercise 4.6 Understanding Practitioner–Client Relationships 85
Apply and Demonstrate Practice Exercise: Professionalism and
Professional Relationships 86
Summary 86
x Contents
SECTION 2 BUILDING PROFESSIONAL RELATIONSHIPS 87
CHAPTER 5 DEVELOPING WORKING RELATIONSHIPS 89

Use of Self 91
Homework Exercise 5.1 Professional Use of Self 91
Homework Exercise 5.2 Current Assets and Assets to Develop 92
Helping Relationships 92
Homework Exercise 5.3 Qualities in Helping Relationships 93
Core Interpersonal Qualities 93
Warmth 94
Homework Exercise 5.4 Expressing Warmth 94
Empathy 95
Homework Exercise 5.5 Empathy 96
Cultural Diversity and Empathy 96
Box 5.1 Movies about Diverse Groups and Challenges 97
Respect 99
Homework Exercise 5.6 Respect 99
Genuineness 100
Homework Exercise 5.7 Genuineness 100
Common Mistakes 100
Offering Advice 101
Reassuring 101
Offering Excuses 101
Asking Leading Questions 102
Dominating through Teaching 102
Labeling 102
Interrogating 102
Homework Exercise 5.8 Unhelpful Responses You May Have Experienced 103
Apply and Demonstrate Practice Exercise 5: Apply Understanding of
How Diversity Affects People’s Life and Demonstrate Empathy with
Someone Much Different from Yourself 103
Summary 104
CHAPTER 6 FOUNDATIONAL INTERPERSONAL SKILLS 105

Core Interpersonal Skills for Helping 106
Being a Good Observer 106
Homework Exercise 6.1 Being a Good Observer 107
Observing in Groups 108
Observing in Community Groups and Organizations 108
Attending to Clients 109
Homework Exercise 6.2 Attending 110
Active Listening 110
Homework Exercise 6.3 Actively Listening 112
Expressing Warmth 112
Warmth Evaluation Scale 113
Homework Exercise 6.4 Expressing Warmth 113
Using Interpersonal Qualities and Skills in Practice Interviews 113
Apply and Demonstrate Exercise 6: Attending, Observing, Listening,
and Expressing Warmth 115
Summary 118
Contents xi
CHAPTER 7 Beginning and Ending a Meeting 119

Preparing for Work 121
Homework Exercise 7.1 Preparing to Meet with a New Client 122
Homework Exercise 7.2 Preparing to Be Fully Present 122
Beginning a First Meeting 123
Setting the Tone 123
Explaining the Process 124
Homework Exercise 7.3 Beginning a First Group Meeting 126
Beginning Subsequent Meetings 126
Explaining Confidentiality 127
Box 7.1 Example of What a Practitioner Might Say at the Beginning of a Meeting 128
Minors and Confidentiality 128
Confidentiality in Groups 129
Administrative Contracts 129
Box 7.2 Informed Consent 130
Ending a Meeting 131
Homework Exercise 7.4 Ending 133
Working with Cases 133
Case: Case, Part 1: Hideko Asks for Help 134
Apply and Demonstrate Practice Exercise 7: Begining, Listening, and Ending 135
Summary 137
CHAPTER 8 DEMONSTRATING ACTIVE LISTENING 139

The Importance of Being Empathic 140
Verbally Expressing Active Listening 1410
V
Homework Exercise 8.1 Listening for Empathic Responses 142
Reflecting Content 142
Homework Exercise 8.2 Reflecting Content 142
Reflecting Feelings 143
Reflecting Feelings in Families and Groups 145
Homework Exercise 8.3 Reflecting Feelings 145
Reflecting Feelings and Content 146
Homework Exercise 8.4 Reflecting Feelings and Content 146
Summarizing 147
Homework Exercise 8.5 Summarizing 148
Reflecting Meaning 148
Homework Exercise 8.6 Reflecting Meanings 150
Reflecting Understanding of Diversity Issues 150
Evaluating Expressions of Empathy 151
Homework Exercise 8.7 Expressing Empathy 152
Empathy Evaluation Scale 152
Apply and Demonstrate Practice Exercise 8: Demonstrating Active Listening
and Expressing Empathic Understanding 152
Summary 156
SECTION 3 EXPLORING AND ASSESSING WITH CLIENTS 157
CHAPTER 9 USING QUESTIONS 159

Using Questions to Explore Further 160
Open-Ended Questions 161
Homework Exercise 9.1 Open-Ended Questions 162
xii Contents
Closed-Ended Questions 162

Homework Exercise 9.2 Closed-Ended Questions 163
Using Question to Gain Deeper Understanding 163
Seeking Clarification 163
Homework Exercise 9.3 Seeking Clarification 166
Client’s Role in Clarification 166
Allowing Silence 166
Homework Exercise 9.4 Allowing Silence 167
Common Mistakes When Using Questions 168
Homework Exercise 9.5 Multiple Questions 169
Genuineness 169
Homework Exercise 9.6 Characteristics and Behaviors Associated with
Genuineness 169
Genuineness Evaluation Scale 169
Apply and Demonstrate Practice Exercise 9: Using Questions
and Expressing Genuineness 170
Summary 173
CHAPTER 10 EXPLORING AND DISCOVERING 175

Important Areas to Learn About 176
Learning about the Problems or Challenges 177
Homework Exercise 10.1 Learning about Problems or Challenges 177
Learning about the Situation or Environment 178
Homework Exercise 10.2 Persons and Their Environment 179
Focusing on Strengths and Positive Factors 179
Identifying Strengths and Positive Factors 180
Homework Exercise 10.3 Identifying Strengths 181
Questions to Learn about Strengths and Positive Factors 181
Homework Exercise 10.4 Asking Questions about Positive Factors
and Strengths 182
Connecting Strengths and Empowerment 182
Homework Exercise 10.5 Learning about Empowering Experiences 182
Demonstrating Respect 183
Respect Evaluation Scale 183
Homework Exercise 10.6 Demonstrating Respect 184
Case: Case, Part 2: First Meeting with Hideko 184
Apply and Demonstrate Practice Exercise 10: Learning More by Exploring
and Discovering Strengths and Expressing Respect 186
Summary 189
CHAPTER 11 ASSESSING READINESS AND MOTIVATION 191

Stages of Readiness to Change 192
Precontemplation 193
Contemplation 194
Preparation 194
Action 195
Maintenance 196
Relapse/Termination 196
Homework Exercise 11.1 Stages of Change 197
Table 11.1 Prochaska’s Stages of Readiness to Change 197
Assessing Stage of Change 197
Homework Exercise 11.2 Assessing Stage of Change 198
Social Cognitive Theory 198
Contents xiii
Homework Exercise 11.3 Reflecting on Social Cognitive Theory 199

Homework Exercise 11.4 Assessing Self-Efficacy 200
Assessing Motivation to Change 200
Homework Exercise 11.5 Motivation for Change 200
Discounting 201
Homework Exercise 11.6 Discounting 203
Other Factors That Influence Motivation to Change 203
Strengths, Capacity, and Resources 203
Homework Exercise 11.7 Relationship of Strengths, Capacity, and Resources
to Motivation 204
Level of Stress and Demands 204
Homework Exercise 11.8 Impact of Stress and Demands on Motivation 204
Hope 205
Homework Exercise 11.9 Understanding the Effect of Hope 206
Case: Apply and Demonstrate Practice Exercise 11: Case, Part 3: Second Meeting
with Hideko 207
Summary 208
SECTION 4 DEFINING THE FOCUS 209
CHAPTER 12 IDENTIFYING KEY PROBLEMS OR CHALLENGES 211

Understanding the Client’s Problems 212
Dealing with Crisis 214
Homework Exercise 12.1 Dealing with Crisis Situations 215
Working with Clients in the Pre-contemplation Stage 215
Blaming Others for the Problem 215
Homework Exercise 12.2 Blaming Others for Problems 217
Rolling with Resistance 217
Homework Exercise 12.3 Rolling with Resistance 218
Identifying Discrepancies 219
Homework Exercise 12.4 Identifying Discrepancies 219
Working with Clients in the Contemplation Stage 220
Expressing Empathy 220
Homework Exercise 12.5 Expressing Empathic Understanding
of Ambivalence 220
Advanced Reflecting 221
Homework Exercise 12.6 Advanced Reflecting 222
Identifying Patterns and Themes 223
Homework Exercise 12.7 Identifying Patterns and Themes 225
Working with Clients in the Preparation Stage 226
Partializing 226
Homework Exercise 12.8 Partializing 226
Supporting Self-Efficacy 227
Homework Exercise 12.9 Supporting Self-Efficacy 227
Problem Identification 227
Homework Exercise 12.10 Identification of Problems 230
Ethical Considerations in Problem Identification 230
Homework Exercise 12.11 Problem Identification, Autonomy,
and Self-Determination 230
Apply and Demonstrate Practice Exercise 12: Identifying
Problems and Challenges 231
Summary 234
xiv Contents
CHAPTER 13 ESTABLISHING GOALS 235

Identifying General Goals 236
Homework Exercise 13.1 General Goals 237
Identifying Measurable, Attainable, Positive, and Specific Goals 237
Measurable and Specific Goals 238
Measur
Homework Exercise 13.2 Developing Measurable and Specific Goals 239
Homework Exercise 13.3 Value of Measurable and Specific Goals 239
Attainable Goals 240
Homework Exercise 13.4 Attainable Goals 241
Positive Goals 241
Homework Exercise 13.5 Positive Goals 242
Homework Exercise 13.6 Creating Measureable, Attainable, Positive
and Specific (Maps) Goals 245
Homework Exercise 13.7 Establishing Several Maps Goals 246
Agreements for Work 246
Homework Exercise 13.8 Agreements for Work 247
Monitoring Alliance with Practitioner and Progress 247
Homework Exercise 13.9 Monitoring Alliance and Progress 248
Monitoring Progress Using Goal Attainment Scaling 248
Homework Exercise 13.10 Goal Attainment Scale 250
Case: Case, Part 4: Hideko, Identifying Problems and Goals 251
Apply and Demonstrate Practice Exercise 13: Reaching Agreement about
General Goals and Maps Goals 252
Summary 256
SECTION 5 DOING, EVALUATING, AND ENDING THE WORK 257
CHAPTER 14 TAKING ACTION 259

Identifying Steps 260
Further Explor
Exploration of the Problem 261
Steps Identified by Clients 261
Using Exception-Finding Questions to Identify Steps 262
Homework Exercise 14.1 Identifying Steps 263
Evaluating, Organizing, and Planning the Steps 263
Homework Exercise 14.2 Planning and Organizing Steps 264
Monitoring Progress and Focusing on Improvement 265
Homework Exercise 14.3 Focusing on Improvement 266
Skills To Enhance Achievement of Steps 266
T
Teaching 266
Homework Exercise 14.4 Teaching 268
Directing 268
Homework Exercise 14.5 Directing 269
Inviting a Different Perspective 270
Homework Exercise 14.6 Inviting a Different Perspective 271
Identifying Discrepancies 272
Homework Exercise 14.7 Identifying Discrepancies 273
Giving Feedback 273
Homework Exercise 14.8 Giving Feedback 274
Contents xv
Self-Disclosure 274
Homework Exercise 14.9 Self-Disclosure 276
Immediacy 276
Homework Exercise 14.10 Immediacy 277
TTable 14.1 Skills to Enhance Achievement of Steps 277
Case: Case, Part 5: Hideko, Taking Action 278
Apply and Demonstrate Practice Exercise 14: Taking Action 279
Summary 282
CHAPTER 15 EVALUATING AND ENDING PROFESSIONAL

RELATIONSHIPS 283
Evaluating Progress 284
Evaluation as an Ongoing Process 284
Homework Exercise 15.1 Ongoing Evaluation and Measuring Progress 286
Evaluation for Professional Development 287
Ending Professional Relationships 287
The Ending Process 287
Feelings about Ending 288
Endings with Task Groups and Larger Groups 289
Homework Exercise 15.2 Endings 290
Planning for Career-Long Professional Development 291
Staying Current on Evidence-Based Practice 292
Case: Case, Part 6: Hideko, Evaluation, and Ending 293
Apply and Demonstrate Practice Exercise 15: Evaluation and Ending 293
Case: Case, Part 7: Hideko’s Review of Progress 296
Summary 296
APPENDIX A: PRACTICE EVALUATION SCALES 297
APPENDIX B: OVERALL PRACTICE EVALUATION FORM 299
REFERENCES 303
GL
GLOSSARY 319
INDEX 323
PREFACE
Considerable information is available regarding techniques for working with

specific systems, such as individuals, organizations, families, or groups. Few texts
explore the overarching skills, knowledge, and processes that are essential to work-
ing with any of these systems. This text is designed to fill that gap by focusing
on skills that are used in working with systems of all sizes. Our premise is that
beginning practitioners need to develop self-understanding, knowledge of ethical
principles and professional relationships, and mastery of foundational practice
information. Competency in the use of self and basic professional tasks and skills is
essential before moving to advanced approaches or system-specific knowledge and
skills. This book focuses on the practice behaviors and competencies that have been
identified as important in the major helping professions.
The book is organized into five sections: 1. Foundation; 2. Building Professional
Relationships; 3. Exploring and Assessing with Clients; 4. Defining the Focus; and
5. Doing, Evaluating, and Ending the Work. Each section includes several chapters.
Each chapter is an essential building block in the development of competent begin-
ning level practice.
● The Foundation section includes chapters covering the information and tasks
that must be mastered before beginning to see clients. These building blocks
include the importance of self-understanding, major ways of perceiving self
and others, values, ethics and legal obligations, and professional relationships
and roles.
● The chapters in Sections 2–5 describe skills and qualities used by practitioners
and strengths and resources contributed by clients. Each of these chapters pro-
vides ample opportunities for students to use practice skills.
• Section 2, Building Professional Relationships, includes chapters on de-
veloping relationships, basic interpersonal skills, beginning and closing
a meeting, and demonstrating active listening. Section 3, Exploring and
Assessing with Clients, includes chapters on using questions, exploring and
discovering, and thinking about readiness and motivation.
• Section 4, Defining the Focus, includes chapters on identifying challenges
and establishing goals.
• Section 5, Doing, Evaluating, and Ending the Work, includes chapters on
taking action and on evaluating progress, and ending.
xvii
xviii Preface
NEW IN THIS EDITION

● Expanded and updated technology sections in the ethics, legal, and profes-
sional behavior areas This is particularly helpful since today’s students need to
understand the ethical issues related to any use of technology.
● Expanded discussion of diversity issues We live in a very diverse society.
Students need to be prepared to work with clients from many backgrounds
and understand the need for and the value of learning about work with diverse
client groups throughout their professional career.
● Updated information on topics covered in the book
● Information related to recent professional competencies Each of the helping
professions are interested in competency-based education and being able to
demonstrate that students have mastered competencies. In addition to covering
a broad range of competencies, this book includes a variety of ways to measure
mastery of competencies.
● Learning objectives included in each chapter related to competencies An Apply
and Demonstrate practice exercise allows students to show mastery of the
chapter competencies. The summary identifies the major topics in the chapter
and is followed by a review that invites students to explain their understanding
of the chapter objectives.
● More focus on active listening Students need to understand the importance of
active listening, being empathic, and expressing empathic understanding. These
skills are often challenging for students and need emphasis.
● Availability of MindTap Using the many resources available in MindTap makes
the work of instructors much easier and assures higher levels of students learning.
COMPETENCIES IN THE TEXTBOOK

Competency #
Professional
Major Psychology
Competencies Beginning Competency # Competency # Location
Covered in Competency # Practicum Competency # Marriage & Human in Book by
the Book Social Work Level Counseling Family Services Chapters
Advance human 3 Professional 1–4
rights, social & orientation &
economic justice ethical practice
Appropriate use 1 2.5.1, 5.5.2 4

of supervision &
consultation
Apply critical 7, 8, 9 Implicit in 4. Problem 7–15

thinking applying analysis &
theory & decision analysis
interventions
Preface xix
Competency #
Professional
Major Psychology
Understand and 6, 7, 8, 9 Human Human growth 1.1.1, 1.2.1, 1. Understanding 2 & 6–15
apply human growth & & development 1.2.2, 2.1.1, human systems
behavior & development 2.3.3, 2.3.8 of all sizes
social 2. Models of
environment causation
knowledge
Assessment 7 Interviewing & Counseling, 1.3.1, 2.2.1 4. Problem 11–15

relationships; prevention and 2.3.2, 3.3.6 analysis
Interpersonal intervention
communication
Conditions that Importance 2. Understanding 1 & 2

promote or of relational conditions that
inhibit human skills in clinical promote or
growth relationships limit optimal
functioning
Develop & 7, 8 2.4.4, 3.3.1 13

implement
mutually
agreed-on goals
Diversity- 2 Diversity & Social and 4.3.2 Throughout

understanding & cultural cultural the book
ability to work adaptability diversity
effectively with
diverse clients
Engagement 6 1.3.6 5–14
Ethics- 1 Ethics Ethical practice 1.5.1 5. Understanding 3

understands 5.1.15.1.2 of human service
values & ethic 5.2.1–5.3.1 ethics
of profession
and legal
obligations and
limitations
Ethical use of 1 3
technology
Ethical decision 1 5.4.1 3

making
xx Preface
Competency #
Professional
Major Psychology
Evaluation 8&9 Interventions Counseling, 3.4.1 4. Intervention 13 & 15
planning & intervention, 4.3.10 evaluation
developing and evaluation 4.4.2–4.4.6
relationships
Helping 6 Assumed in Helping 4–15

relationships interventions & relationships
relationships
Information 1.3.4, 1.3.5 7 & 15

management 3.3.9, 3.5.3
and 5.3.3
communication
with clients
Interprofessional 1, 8 1.3.8, 3.3.7 5

roles &
collaboration
Interventions— 7&8 Intervention Counseling, 1.4.1 3. Identifying 6–15

competent use implementation prevention, and 4.4.1–4.4.5 and selecting
of skills with intervention interventions
individuals, 4. Planning and
families, implementing
groups, & interventions
organizations
Professional 1 Professional Professional 1.5.3 6. Profession 4

behavior & demeanor & orientation role conduct
roles professional
relationships
Research 4 Knowledge of 5.3.8 13–15

informed the sources &
practice utility of
scientific
literature
Self-development 5.3.10 4
Self- 1, 2, 6, 7, 9 Knowledge of 3.4.5, 5.4.2 5. Awareness 1–4

awareness and self-boundaries of values
self-regulation & affect in of self and
developing organization
relationships
Preface xxi
Competency #
Professional
Major Psychology
Understand 3 3. Advocacy 4
and advocate
to eliminate
oppressive &
promote
equality
Use empathy, 6 5–15

reflection &
other
interpersonal
skills
competently
MINDTAP
MindTap is an extensive online learning system that includes the ebook, assign-
ments that bring course concepts to life, supplemental readings, video and dis-
cussions questions, and practice and apply exercises. This cloud-based platform
integrates learning applications (“apps”) into an easy-to-use and easy-to-access tool
that supports a personalized learning experience. MindTap combines student learn-
ing tools—readings, multimedia, activities and assessments—into a singular Learn-
ing Path that guides students through the course.
SUPPLEMENTS
Online Instructor’s Manual
The Instructor’s Manual (IM) contains a variety of resources to aid instructors in
preparing and presenting text material in a manner that meets their personal prefer-
ences and course needs. It presents chapter-by-chapter suggestions and resources to
enhance and facilitate learning.
Online Test Bank

For assessment support the updated test bank includes true/false, multiple-choice,
matching, short answer, and essay questions for each chapter.
Online PowerPoint
Vibrant Microsoft® PowerPoint® lecture slides for each chapter assists instructors
with their lectures with your lecture by providing concept coverage using images,
figures, and tables directly from the textbook.
xxii Preface
A FEW WORDS ABOUT LANGUAGE

Although we believe that there are no right ways to deal with the challenges of
language, we value clarity. Therefore, we will explain the language decisions that
we have made. We have chosen to use the word practitioner to refer to helping pro-
fessionals from all backgrounds (e.g., counseling, psychology, social work, pastoral
care, nursing, marriage and family therapy, etc.). We use gender-specific pronouns
when appropriate, but otherwise use he or she or his or her. When referring to
clients who may be individuals, families, groups, or organizations, we specify a par-
ticular system size if that designation is needed; otherwise we use the word client to
refer to the many system sizes. We use the word group to refer to a task group (peo-
ple working on a project), a support group (people whose goal is to support and en-
courage each other), and a counseling group (people who are helping each other to
make life changes). We use the word meeting to refer to any engagement between a
practitioner and client, including individual, family, couple sessions, group meetings,
and meetings with organizations. Finally, we have chosen to use the word counsel-
ing when referring to the many activities engaged in by practitioners when working
to facilitate change with individuals, families, and groups.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
We want to thank all of those who have contributed to our work: clients, students,
teachers, and colleagues at Indiana University School of Social Work and Azusa
Pacific University, Department of Graduate Psychology, our families, our friends,
the reviewers, editors, and all of the many other people who have contributed to
this project.
The team of people from Cengage Learning worked with us so closely that I
feel like I know each of them. All of the staff at Cengage Learning helped and en-
couraged us at each step of the process related to the third edition. Julie Martinez,
Project Manager, has overseen this new edition from the beginning. She helped us
think about and decide on changes needed in this edition. Steve Lagos, Director’s
Assistant, put together all the feedback from reviewers. His work made deciding
how to appropriately respond to the reviewers much easier. Ellie Raissi, Content
Developer, has been our day-to-day go to person. She has worked closely with us
on every aspect of the book. Her patience and accessibility has been a great help.
Kristina Mose-Libon, Design Director Lumina Datamatics, created wonderful cover
possibilities and was very open to our feedback as she finalized the design. Ronald
D’Souza, Production Manager Lumina Datamatics, has assisted us with each step in
the production process. His flexibility and availability has been very helpful. Thank
you also to the many others at Cengage that we didn’t work with directly who were
very important in the development and production of this book. We are very lucky
to have such an excellent, skilled, professional and helpful team working with us.
This book would not have been written if we had not had the opportunity to
work with many clients and students. From our clients we learned about what really
is effective. From our students, we learned what methods of teaching they find most
helpful in their journey to becoming competent practitioners.
We have been fortunate to have the assistance of many contributing authors,
including Mulunesh Abebe Alebachew, Susan Charlesworth, Lynne Fisher, Carolyn
Gentle-Genitty, Carol Hostetter, Khadija Khaja, Kathy Lay, Heather A. McCabe,
Thomas L. Moore, Takiya Paicely, Phyllis Shea, Sabrina Williamson Sullenberger,
and Stephan Viehweg.
Preface xxiii
From Valerie Chang

I want to particularly thank my family: Jeff, Amy, James, Matthew, Laura, Rachael,
and Stan. Their loving support makes everything I do possible and adds joy to my
life. I am blessed with many, very dear friends who have been encouraging, under-
standing, and very patient through the challenges of writing this third edition. I will
always be grateful to my parents, Ava and Howard Nash, who told me “you can do
it” and believed that I could do whatever I decided to do. A special thanks to the
faculty and students who used and liked the previous editions and gave us sugges-
tions for enhancing this edition.
From Carol Decker

I want to thank my husband for his support throughout the writing and rewriting
process, and all of the patient “teachers” I have had over the years of my life, be-
ginning with my mother, Phyllis Linzer. As my first teacher, she instilled a love of
learning that has remained constant throughout my life. I especially want to thank
the many families at Riley Hospital for Children who enhanced my life in ways
they will never know. It has been a privilege to work with each and every one. I also
want to thank my coauthors, who have been a delight and pleasure to work with,
even through our most hectic times.
From Sheryn Scott

There are many students, friends, and family members who sacrificed time so that
I could work on this text. I particularly want to thank my daughters, Ali Borden,
who as an author was always encouraging, and Kara Russ, who provided wonder-
ful grandchildren as a necessary distraction to the hard complexities of writing a
book. No part of my participation in the various editions of this book would have
happened without the patient support of my late husband, Larry Hixon. Finally, I
want to recognize the many supervisors and teachers who taught me the knowledge,
skills, and attitudes that we hope to teach others with this book.
INTRODUCTION: THE TEACHING-
LEARNING SYSTEM
This book is written with four main goals in mind. The first goal is to provide fun-
damental knowledge necessary for students preparing for careers in the fields of
social work, psychology, educational counseling, counseling, marriage and family
therapy, pastoral counseling, human services, and related helping professions. The
second goal is to explain and give multiple examples of how basic practice skills
are used when working with individuals, families, different types of groups, and
organizations. The third goal is to give students enough opportunities to reflect on
and apply the knowledge so the new information can be integrated and used in
many situations throughout their career. The fourth goal is to provide students with
opportunities to demonstrate their competency in the use of the basic practice skills
necessary to work effectively with clients. In order to achieve these goals, the fol-
lowing teaching-learning system is recommended.
Becoming a competent practitioner requires learning how to apply practice knowl-
edge, how to think about clients in the ways used by experienced practitioners, and
how to appropriately and effectively use the skills and tasks necessary to work effec-
tively with clients. This book’s learning system provides information and practice exer
exer-
cises that will help you become a competent, self-reflective professional, so that you are
able to evaluate your practice and identify your strengths and areas for growth.
This learning system can be used in a variety of ways. Instructors may select
the parts of the learning system that best suit their course objectives, teaching phi-
losophy, and style. Detailed suggestions and additional information related to each
aspect of the teaching-learning system are provided in the Instructor’s Manual avail-
able on the Cengage website.
Achieving competency requires multiple methods of learning. Although each
person learns in his or her own unique way, active learning methods are proven ef-
fective and popular with undergraduate and graduate students. This teaching-learn-
ing system involves the following learning methods:
● Reading about information related to professional practice and the skills and
tasks needed to work effectively with clients
● Thinking and writing about ideas related to the concepts that are discussed
● Watching and discussing a video demonstration of use of the skills (available to
students using MindTap)
● Applying knowledge and skills to a specific client situation
● Working in task groups on cases
● Practicing skills in a simulated interview
● Evaluating the use of the skills immediately after practicing them
xxv
xxvi Introduction: The Teaching-Learning System
READING
Each chapter begins with questions for students to consider as they are reading the
chapter and a list of learning objectives related to the chapter and to important
competencies. As each new concept, skill, or task is introduced, students read about
how the knowledge or skill is applied with different system sizes, including indi-
viduals, families, groups, and larger systems. The chapter ends a summary of key
concepts in the chapter.
THINKING AND WRITING

Homework exercises are provided following the introduction of new concepts. The
purpose of the homework exercises is to enhance learning by inviting students to
think about the concepts and skills and to write about and actively use the concepts.
In many homework exercises, students are encouraged to reflect on how the con-
cept is related to their own life experiences. Instructors using Just-in-Time teaching
may have students turn in assigned homework online before class. This assure that
students begin active learning before coming to class and gives instructors time to
assess the students’ level of understanding and learning before class. In class, further
active learning can be stimulated by asking students to discuss specific homework
exercises with a partner or in small groups.
WATCHING AND DISCUSSING

Those students using MindTap will use a video that demonstrates the use of the
skills discussed in the book. Following the introduction of a group of new skills,
students can see how an experienced practitioner uses these skills. Seeing skills used
with clients helps students understand how to apply these skills.
There are various ways to use the video to enhance learning and evaluate
competency. For example, many instructors give students basic information about
the client and ask the students to answer questions before seeing the video. Such
questions include:
● How would you prepare for a meeting with this client?
● What do you need to learn about before meeting with this client?
● What are your hunches about what the client might be thinking, feeling, and
expecting?
● What are your concerns about working with this client?
● What, if any, personal issues would working with this client bring up for you?
Exercises for each section of the video include asking students to name the skills
being used, to identify other skills that might be used, to evaluate the practitioner’s
use of the skills, and to discuss the quality of the relationship between the practi-
tioner and the client.
WORKING WITH CASES

For many students, information and skills learned in class do not transfer to
real-world practice (Koerin, Harrigan, & Reeves, 1990; Lombardi, 2007; Vayda &
Bogo, 1991). One way to help students transfer knowledge and skills is by provid-
ing opportunities for them to work on real-life cases and to learn how professionals
Introduction: The Teaching-Learning System xxvii
think about case information (Middendorf & Pace, 2005). Using the case provided
in the text and the 5 additional cases in the Instructor’s Manual, students can apply
knowledge and skills to real world situations and begin thinking like professionals
who must take into account facts, impressions, knowledge, values, ethics, and laws
as they decide on appropriate action and use their practice skills (Brooks, Harris, &
Clayton, 2010; Lynn, 1999).
Thinking through the complexity of working with cases based on actual prac-
tice situations helps students learn to think like professionals (Lynn, 1999; Wolfer &
Scales, 2005). Students learn that there is no “right” answer to problems, and that
appropriate responses are relative and situation specific. Working with cases fos-
ters an understanding of and a respect for the uniqueness of each client’s situation,
needs, and resources. By using cases, students learn both subject matter and skills
such as critical thinking, communication, group collaboration, and self-assessment.
Cases also provide an opportunity for students to develop the problem-solving,
diagnostic, and clinical reasoning skills that are vital to the counseling process.
Case-based learning involves interactive, student-centered exploration of realistic
and specific situations. The specific type of case-based learning used in the book is prob-
lem-based learning (PBL), a learning system that replicates practice by giving students
one section of a case at time. Research shows that PBL makes learning more exciting
and interesting to students (Albanese & Mitchell, 1993; Barrows & Tamblyn, 1980;
Searight & Searight, 2009; Vasconez, Donnelly, Mayo, & Schwartz, 1993; Vernon &
Blake, 1993). By using this interactive, student-driven approach to learning, retention
and reinforcement of information is enhanced (Bennett-Levy, 2006; Bernstein, Tipping,
Bercovitz, & Skinner, 1995). Problem-based learning involves engaging in active learn-
ing, setting learning goals, discovering gaps in knowledge, and sharing responsibility
for completing assignments. Using problem-based learning, your instructor serves as an
advisor or guide, not the expert.
One case is included in the book. Starting in Chapter 7, sections of a case are
presented; each new section adds information. In our modified problem-based learn-
ing (MPBL), general questions for students to consider and discuss are added at the
end of each case section. The questions have been developed to help students learn
the basic ways that practitioners approach thinking about case situations. The ques-
tions require students to differentiate between impressions and facts, and to iden-
tify and seek out needed information. Students report that using the MPBL method
required them to think about how to apply theory to practice, prepared them to
work with clients, and helped them to feel confident about their readiness to work
with clients (Chang & Sullenberger, 2009). The Instructor’s Manual includes addi-
tional information about using the modified problem-based learning method and
suggests other ways to use the cases to enhance student learning.
The book case can be used in class to demonstrate how to work with cases.
To maximize student participation and learning, we suggest having students form
groups to work on the cases. Students answer all the questions individually prior
to coming together with their group to discuss the answers. The final step is for the
group to present and/or write their answers to each question.
WORKING IN TASK GROUPS

Current research on teaching identifies that learning is enhanced when students
work together in groups. Working in a group gives students the opportunity to learn
about the viewpoints and experiences of other people, and to move from passive
xxviii Introduction: The Teaching-Learning System
learner to active, self-directed learner. By discussing cases in a small group, each

group member has the opportunity to share experiences, thoughts, and perspectives.
Just as practitioners discuss case-related dilemmas with their team or colleagues,
each member of your group will serve as a resource. Group members can share
in leading the discussion and recording the group’s progress. Group work is more
effective when groups establish ground rules, such as the way members will report
their information and what should happen when a member is absent or doesn’t
complete the assignment. For students planning to enter the helping professions,
learning to work effectively in a group is essential as they will often be working on
teams.
As they work in groups, students develop skills in assessment, planning, and
evaluating, as well as gain an appreciation for the benefits of collaboration. As a
group, students identify their learning goals and determine the resources needed to
accomplish their goals. Using this book, groups can be used to discuss homework
assignmentsand either the book case or the cases in the Instructor’s Manual. Group
collaboration is very helpful when dealing with the complexity of each case. The
Instructor’s Manual includes tips and assignments that can be used to help students
work effectively in groups.
PRACTICING
The Apply and Demonstrate Practice exercises give students opportunities to apply
their practice skills and demonstrate their competency. Starting in Chapter 6, Apply
and Demonstrate Practice exercises invite students to demonstrate their level of
competency. In the practice exercises, students work in a group of three people and
take turns playing the roles of practitioner, client, and peer supervisor. Each practice
exercise includes specific directions for these three roles. Students who have used
this system reported learning a great deal in each role.
Using this learning system, students focus on one group of skills at a time. After
mastering one group of skills, students move on to the next discrete group of skills.
With each practice session, students repeat the previously practiced skills and add
new skills. As students improve their ability to use skills, they receive positive feed-
back and experience increasing confidence in their ability to use the practiced skills.
The Apply and Demonstrate Practice exercises simulate work with an individual
client because this is easiest for students. As students gain confidence using the skills
with individuals, they can move on to using the skills with families, groups, commu-
nities, and organizations.
After developing an adequate repertoire of basic skills, students can learn more
advanced skills and ways to use skills effectively with a wide variety of clients in
many different situations. As their mastery of these skills improves, their ability to
be empathic, warm, respectful, and genuine will increase as will their ability to be
attuned with their clients. Over time most practitioners develop a personal style
or ways to more fully include their unique ways of relating in the helping process.
Using this book and education system, students gain competency in the use of the
basic knowledge and skills necessary to effectively facilitate the change process.
EVALUATING
As students practice new skills, it is important for them to evaluate their competency
(Bennett-Levy & Beedie, 2007). This book includes an evaluation system that has
Introduction: The Teaching-Learning System xxix
been tested and shown to be valid (Pike, Bennett, & Chang, 2004). Undergraduate
and graduate students, as well as agency supervisors, have been able to quickly learn
and use this system. After teaching the students about the importance of immediate,
honest feedback, instructors can demonstrate how to use this simple system.
The evaluation system provides students with immediate feedback about their
use of skills and their demonstration of the core interpersonal qualities (warmth,
empathy, respect, and genuineness). Immediate feedback is a central part of this
learning system. After each practice session, the student’s work is evaluated: the per-
son in the client role gives feedback about whether or not he or she felt understood
and thought there was a respectful connection with the practitioner, the practitioner
identifies his or her perceived strengths and weaknesses, and the peer supervisor
gives the practitioner feedback on the use of skills. In the role of peer supervisor,
students learn to constructively evaluate both the use of skills and the demonstra-
tion of core interpersonal qualities. Guidelines for making these judgments are
provided so that beginning practitioners can learn to accurately evaluate skills and
recognize strengths and limitations. Having clear, behavioral descriptors helps be-
ginning practitioners become aware of their strengths and their mistakes (Kruger &
Dunning, 1999; Tsai, Callaghan, Kohlenberg, Follette, & Darrow, 2009). Additional
directions related to doing the practice exercises and evaluating each exercise are
included before the first Apply and Demonstrate Practice exercise in Chapter 6.
In class, instructors often rotate among student groups and offer feedback to
the students in the role of peer supervisor and practitioner. Online instructors may
have students do the Apply and Demonstrate Practice exercises in groups of three
people who meet together in person or us a recording method, such as Zoom. Some
online instructors have students record some of their Apply and Demonstrate exer exer-
cises and upload the video for the instructor to view.
Some instructors ask students to do a beginning video interview. As students
gain skills, they can evaluate this beginning interview. Later in the course, instruc-
tors may require students to do a final video interview demonstrating their use of
all of the skills and evaluated by the student and instructor using this evaluation
system. Additional information on using the evaluation system is available in the
Instructor’s Manual.
When the students move on to practicum or internship placements, they can
assess the quality of their work with clients using this evaluation system. If their
supervisors have been trained to use this evaluation system, students and their su-
pervisors can use this system to move from beginning evaluations of practice skills
to setting specific goals for improvement. Using this evaluation system in class and/
or in field settings is an excellent way to measure and demonstrate skill competency.
Ultimately, our goal is that each student becomes an effective, reflective practitioner
who uses self-evaluation, learns from mistakes and successes, and is continuously
improving.
SECTION 1
FOUNDATION
Evaluating and
5 Taking Action Ending Professional
Relationships
4 Identifying Key Problems

Establishing Goals
or Challenges
Thinking about
3 Exploring and
Using Questions Readiness and
Discovering
Motivation
2 Developing Working Foundational Beginning and Ending Demonstrating

Relationships Interpersonal Skills a Meeting Active Listening
1 Importance of Self- Ways of Understanding and Values, Ethics, and Legal Professionalism and
Understanding Perceiving Self and Others Obligations Professional Relationships
2 Section 1
As is true in any profession, becoming a skilled practitioner takes energy,

perseverance, dedication, and time. Your efforts to enhance your ability to work
effectively and collaboratively with clients will bring many rewards. There is
satisfaction in seeing individuals develop self-esteem, families work together,
communities find a renewed sense of purpose, and organizations build a culture of
acceptance and encouragement.
To become a competent and effective practitioner, you’ll need to acquire
an array of new skills and knowledge. Developing this knowledge base can be
compared to building a wall. Beginning with the foundational information covered
in Chapters 1–4, each chapter is an essential building block that adds to your
development as a practitioner. Chapter 1, Understanding Yourself and Others,
provides information and exercises that will help you understand influences of
personal development; culture, race, and ethnicity; gender, sexual orientation,
socioeconomic status, spirituality and religion; life stages; family of origin;
disability and ability; and stress and demands on you and your clients. Because all
practitioners use themselves to help others, self-understanding is vital. Chapter 2,
Ways of Understanding and Perceiving Self and Others, includes discussion of the
following perspectives constructivist: family systems, ecological, strengths, resilience,
empowerment, and dual perspective. Each of these perspectives influences our
perceptions of and actions toward ourselves and others. Chapter 3, Values, Ethics,
and Legal Obligations, gives an overview of ethical, legal, and professional standards
that apply to practice behavior with clients and provides a decision-making
model to use when dealing with ethical dilemmas. Chapter 4, Professionalism and
Professional Relationships, deals with developing a professional identity, maintaining
professional relationships, using supervision and consultation effectively, engaging
in career long learning, advocating for change and understanding the unique nature
of practitioner relationships with clients.
CHAPTER
1
UNDERSTANDING YOURSELF
AND OTHERS
Evaluating and
5 T
Taking Action Ending Professional
Relationships
4 Identifying Key Problems

Establishing Goals
or Challenges
Thinking about
3 Exploring
Using Questions Readiness and
and Discovering
Motivation
2 Developing Working Foundational Beginning and Ending Demonstrating

Relationships Interpersonal Skills a Meeting Active Listening
1 Understanding Ways of Understanding and Values, Ethics, and Legal Professionalism and
Yourself and Others Perceiving Self and Others Obligations Professional Relationships
4 Chapter 1
Questions to consider as you read this chapter

● What influences on my personal development are important to consider as
I begin to learn to work with clients as a helping professional?
● Why is it important to learn more about myself as I develop as a helping
professional?
Learning Objectives
Students will understand and be able to explain:

● How differences in culture, race, ethnicity, gender, gender identity and
expression, sexual orientation, socioeconomic status, spirituality, religion, life
stage, family of origin, disability and ability, and life stresses and demands
influence the human experience and are critical to the formation of identity
● How to gain sufficient self-understanding to recognize and manage the influence
of personal biases and values in working with diverse groups of people
● How socioeconomic class enhances privilege and power and access to resources
● How the values and structure in a culture (economic, political, and cultural
exclusions) can result in oppression and discrimination
● How their personal experiences and affective reactions may impact their ability
to effectively engage with diverse clients
Students will demonstrate the ability to:
● Apply self-awareness and self-regulation to manage the influence of personal
biases and values understanding
INFLUENCES ON PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT

Personal experiences, capacities, physical abilities, privileges, and limitations
influence development. As we grow and develop our self-concept, we absorb and
are influenced by culture, race and ethnicity, gender and sexual orientation, socio-
economic status, life stage, ability and disability, family, and spiritual beliefs and
norms. A task of practitioners is to understand that their personal beliefs and views
of “truth” are only one way of looking at a situation. Some viewpoints may be in-
grained so deeply that other perspectives can seem not only different, but wrong.
For example, in one therapeutic group, a client who experienced a difficult child-
hood believed that the world was a dangerous place. She often felt scared that
something frightening might happen in her neighborhood. Other members of her
group told her they experienced her neighborhood as a very safe place to live, but
she wasn’t able to see it that way herself. Our perception of what is true depends on
the beliefs we hold.
As a practitioner, understanding and accepting yourself is an essential step to-
ward understanding others (Hill & Lent, 2006). Developing self-understanding and
an awareness of personal biases is a particularly important process in the journey
to becoming a competent practitioner (Sue & Sue, 2016; Vargas & Wilson, 2011).
Self-understanding can be gained by reading and taking classes, receiving competent
Understanding Yourself and Others 5
supervision, being in personal therapy, and setting aside time for self-reflection.
When working with a client, your life experiences can influence how you perceive
your client. In this chapter, basic information related to understanding yourself and
others will be covered. Pay particular attention to areas you may not have consid-
ered before.
The way you see the world has been influenced by the family you grew up in,
the culture you inhabit, and the way you interpreted the events of your life. Your
beliefs affect how you think about yourself, others, and the world. For example, a
woman who was teased a lot during childhood learned to perceive herself as inad-
equate. As an adult, she believed she was only capable of obtaining a low-level job
despite her college degree. She believed others would not take her seriously and
would see her as inadequate.
Before doing this first Homework Exercise, remember from the Introduction
that the purpose of each Homework Exercise is to augment your learning and un-
derstanding of concepts by giving you an opportunity to reflect on and use the ma-
terial. Since the material in this book is essential to your work as a professional, you
need to learn it in a deep, meaningful way so the concepts will be available for you
to use in your career.
HOMEWORK EXERCISE 1.1 UNDERSTA

ST NDING YOUR PERSONAL BELIEF SYSTEM
STA
It is important to recognize the beliefs that have You may have absorbed beliefs about human nature
established your views of yourself, others, and the such as “Being beholden to others is wrong,” “You
world. A cultural belief that was once common was “A can’t trust men, they just want one thing,” “Working
penny saved is a penny earned.” What truisms about hard is the way to succeed,” “Poor people are just
money did you learn in your family? Perhaps you lazy,” “Beggars can’t be choosers,” or “It is best to
received messages about how to behave, such as: “If be cautious around others because you can’t count
you don’t go to church, you’ll go to hell,” “Cleanliness on them.” Write one belief related to each of the
is next to Godliness,” “The early bird catches the following: success, money, and relationships. These
worm,” and “We don’t associate with those kind of beliefs will influence your values, your reactions to
people.” Recall other adages you learned as a child? life experiences, your culture, and other factors.
INFLUENCE OF CULTURE, RACE, AND ETHNICITY

Written by Khadija Khaja
The minority and immigrant populations in the United States have increased over
the past 30 years and are projected to continue to grow over the next 40 years
(U.S. Census Bureau, 2008). In 2013, it was reported that approximately 41.3 million
immigrants lived in the United States, making up about 13% of the population, with
one-quarter being either first or second generation (Zong & Batalova, 2015). From
2012 to 2013, the foreign born population increased by about 523,000 (Zond &
Batalova, 2015). In addition, wars and civil conflicts due to political strife, ethnic
or religious discord are increasing the global refugee crises. As a result, practitioners
are likely to see an increasing number of clients from various ethnicities, races, and
6 Chapter 1
cultures (Refugee Council of Australia, 2015). The United Nations High Commis-
sioner of Refugees (UNHCR) reported that in 2013 more than 50 million people
were forcibly dislocated, with more than 50% coming from Afghanistan, Syria, and
Somalia alone.
Research suggests that multicultural competence seems to be a significant pre-
dictor of satisfaction in counseling for both practitioners and clients. In fact, Fuertes
et al. (2006) found that cultural awareness affected the practitioner’s satisfaction
with his or her own work and increased the client’s perception of the practitioner’s
empathy and the client’s satisfaction with treatment. Conversely, difficulties in coun-
seling arise from unacknowledged differences in the perceptions between the prac-
titioner and the client. Therefore, it is critical for practitioners to understand their
own cultural beliefs and to be aware of the ways in which these beliefs influence
their behavior and expectations of others (Cartwright, Daniels, & Zhang, 2008;
Sue & Sue, 2016).
Although the terms race, culture, and ethnicity are often used interchangeably,
they are defined differently. Race refers to a group of people with specific physical
characteristics that differentiate them from other groups of people (Tseng, 2001).
Ethnicity refers to a group of people distinguished by a shared history, culture,
beliefs, values, and behaviors (Tseng, 2001). In contrast, culture is defined as the
customary beliefs, social forms, and behavior patterns of a racial, religious, or so-
cial group. In this section, we will be discussing how culture affects our beliefs and
values.
Culture’s Influence on the Practitioner

As practitioners, our culture, race, and ethnicity shape our identity and our worl-
dview. They offer us unique life experiences that teach us our language, behaviors,
rules, and ways of understanding others. Culture provides us with a framework
of assumptions or premises for understanding the world and communicating that
understanding to others. For many people it gives meaning to their very own ex-
istence, provides a foundation of strength, and inspiration for coping with various
stressors. Furthermore, culture affects the way that people think, act, or behave and
interpret the world around them (Marsiglia & Kulis, 2015). Such ways of thinking
or behaving are often passed from one generation to another, and are constantly
evolving. Examples of things that can be passed on are language, religious beliefs,
ways of thinking, creative expressions, norms of behavior, arrays of personal and
societal relations, traditions, gender roles, and ritual practices, and so on. Practi-
tioners need to be able to work across many diverse cultures, and respect the multi-
ple identities of any client. Understanding what is common between a practitioner
and a client can help to bridge these differences. However, learning about the cul-
ture of a person that a practitioner is interviewing will be important as it can pro-
vide insight on different factors that can impede building respect and trust between
a practitioner and a client. Being interested in learning about different cultures can
counter any stereotypical assumptions that a practitioner may have about a client.
For example, people can have different “cultural norms about intimacy, making eye
contact, shaking hands, disclosing emotion, parental discipline, and what children
are or are not exposed to” (Miller & Garran, 2008, p. 230). Discussing cultural
differences with those from another culture may be difficult due to factors such
as unfamiliarity with the correct language, unease about creating further distance
or misunderstanding, or apprehension about talking about cultural differences that
may be present (Marsiglia & Kulis, 2015).
Cultural humility refers to one’s ability to maintain an attitude of openness to

the aspects of another’s cultural identity that are most important to that person
(Hook, 2013). Cultural humility ensures that practitioners will solicit help and ad-
vice to increase their own awareness of cultural nuances that are important to cli-
ents. Enhanced awareness helps in building a trusting relationship between both
practitioner and client.
Our culture, race, ethnicity, and worldview influence our values and beliefs
about what behaviors are considered normal, appropriate, or healthy (Fuertes,
2006; Parsons & Zhang, 2014). In Western culture, a common assumption is that
healthy individuals are constantly striving to achieve success and upward social mo-
bility (Liu et al., 2007). This is known as the upward mobility bias. This bias affects
how we judge others. For example, how would you view a man with a PhD, who
has chosen to be a full-time parent to his children, ages 8 and 10 years?
Because of the invisible influence culture has on our perceptions, it is critical for
practitioners to examine their beliefs, assumptions, and biases. As a practitioner,
you should be on a journey of self-discovery. Accepting that how you see the world
is only one way out of many equally valid ways of viewing the world will allow
you to accept and appreciate the worldviews of others (Jernigan, Green, Helms,
Perez-Gualdron, & Henze, 2010). According to Saltzburg (2008), during our self-
reflection we should ask ourselves:
● What is our own cultural identity, family heritage, beliefs, and values
surrounding this identity?
● What are the origins of our beliefs and assumptions?
● How does the notion of privilege influence our formation of personal biases?
● How can we have more interaction with diverse individuals, families, and
groups?
● What are some of the positive or negative interactions we have had with
diverse cultures? How has this influenced us and/or shaped our own
assumptions?
HOMEWORK EXERCISE 1.2 CULTU

L RE, RA
LTU RACE, ETHNICITY, AND VAL
V UES
1. How do you identify yourself culturally, 3. How does your culture describe a successful
racially, and/or ethnically? adult?
2. List three values you learned growing up.
As you become aware of your belief system, you begin to see similarities and
differences among diverse cultures and recognize how these beliefs can influence
your reaction to the behavior of others. Increased awareness of your culture and
other cultures is vital to your development as a practitioner. How does a practi-
tioner develop an understanding and appreciation for culture, race, and ethnicity
issues in counseling? Multicultural knowledge can be partially achieved through the
following tasks:
1. reading about other races, cultures, and ethnic groups;
2. recognizing strengths and weaknesses of dominant and minority racial groups;
8 Chapter 1
3. developing meaningful relationships with people from various racial and

cultural groups;
4. developing relationships with colleagues and mentors who are open to
discussions on cultural or racial issues;
5. watching films about other cultures and races;
6. participating in cultural activities or visiting other countries (Jernigan et al.,
2010);
7. conducting research studies on diverse groups;
8. attending workshop presentations on how to work with diverse clients;
9. taking part in intergroup dialogues, and eventually facilitating such
discussions;
10. volunteering at a refugee center; and
11. accessing information on the web, including webinars, podcasts, and videos.
HOMEWORK EXERCISE 1.3 YOUR CULTU

L RAL BELIEFS
LTU
● When did you first realize that your family ● What were you taught in your family about
belonged to a certain group of people (e.g., people from other ethnic or racial groups? How
African American, Caucasian American, were differences dealt within your family?
Mexican American, Asian American, Irish
American, Euro-American, etc.)?
Culture’s Influence on Clients

Although it is important to understand your cultural belief system, it is equally im-
portant to develop an understanding of the cultures of your clients (Cartwright,
Daniels, & Zhang, 2008; Daniel, Fuchs, Lee, Roemer, & Orsillo, 2013). We need
to become familiar with the culture and political history of clients who differ from
ourselves. Cultural influences occur at many levels including areas such as ways of
coping with stress and adversity (Ponterotto, Casas, Suzuki, & Alexander, 2010;
Tseng, 2001). For example, when coping with illness, pain, and other life challenges,
what does your culture think is appropriate: crying, complaining, gritting your
teeth, being strong, sharing with supportive others, or seeking immediate help?
Culture has a strong influence on the roles that are seen as appropriate. These
may be age-related roles, such as beliefs about the proper behavior of children to-
ward parents, teachers, and society. As you watch children and parents interact,
how do your beliefs about the role of children affect your opinion of the behavior
you see? Practitioners need to become particularly aware of cultural differences in
attitudes regarding independence and autonomy, patterns of communication (verbal
and nonverbal), family boundaries and responsibilities, and the expression of emo-
tions (Capuzzi, 2011; Kim, Ng, & Ahn, 2005). When thinking about the cultural
background of a family, you need to consider the ways that culture has influenced
values about work, education, health care, religion, and family structure and re-
sponsibilities (Congress, 2002). For example, in many Asian societies, adult children
are expected to provide shelter and care for their elderly parents. In some cultures,
parents and other family members expect to be involved in decisions made by adult
children, such as choice of marriage partner and how money is spent.
The level of acculturation of immigrants and their ability to communicate in

the local language is also important. People who are the first generation in a new
country tend to be greatly influenced by their culture of origin. Children of these
first-generation immigrants have grown up in the new country and often feel torn
between the culture of their parents and the culture of their friends. Some clients
have come to your community as refugees, or perhaps their parents were refugees.
Many minority individuals are expected to present themselves as representative of
all members of that culture (Tummala-Narra, 2010). Practitioners must recognize
both the shared cultural experiences and the unique differences in cultural groups.
Chang and Berk (2009) found that clients working with practitioners who were
of a different race or culture had different expectations of the practitioner and used
different standards for evaluating expertise, credibility, and competence. They also
found that Asian participants, while valuing insight and personal growth, tended to
prefer expert guidance, advice, explicit instruction, and structured, problem-focused
suggestions. Practitioners who were more directive were rated more favorably and
were seen as being more helpful. Chang and Berk’s study suggests that effective
practitioners need to demonstrate culture-specific knowledge.
Communication patterns include the appropriateness and timing of eye contact,
the amount of directness in coming to the point of a discussion, personal space
wishes, and even facial expressions. For example, in Western society, direct eye con-
tact is considered polite and appropriate. In some cultural groups, direct eye contact
is considered rude. In some societies, business is discussed only after a period of
social exchanges unrelated to the purpose of the meeting. Smiling may represent
feelings of discomfort, distress, sadness, or anger, rather than happiness (Ansfield,
2007; Jandt, 2016). These communication patterns come into play in counseling
and may create problems if the practitioner and the client are using different com-
munication rules and patterns.
There will be times when you work with clients who have problems or
backgrounds that are similar to yours. You may have a greater intuitive under-
standing about what their life has been like or the pressures they may be experi-
encing. You may make assumptions that their life is just like yours, and that they
feel and think as you do. These assumptions may be incorrect and can lead to
misunderstandings.
Cultural knowledge helps us understand an individual in the context of his
or her cultural, racial, or ethnic values and beliefs. Although becoming a cultur-
ally competent practitioner is a lifetime task, you should become knowledgeable
about the cultures of your clients. As practitioners, we need to become aware of the
“beauty, depth, and complexity of cultures and ways of being in the world other
than [our] own” (Blitz, 2006, p. 246).
Influences of the Dominant Culture

Members of the dominant culture may have difficulty identifying the influence of
their own culture because it is accepted as the norm. People who are members of
the dominant culture often benefit from privilege. They may be unaware of their
privileges while accepting and using them as a natural right (Liu et al., 2007; Todd,
Spanierman, & Aber, 2010). Privilege may be awarded based on race, gender, class,
physical ability, sexual orientation, or age. White privilege is an institutionalized set
of benefits granted to those who resemble the people in power in a culture’s insti-
tutions (Kendall, 2001; Rothenberg, 2008) where the majority of the population
is Caucasian. For example, you may have heard of the term the “old boys’ club.”
10 Chapter 1
Those belonging to this club (albeit nonofficial) are white, male, upper class indi-
viduals and may benefit from elite social and business connections not available
to others. People of color (a description that includes anyone who perceives them-
selves as non-white) do not receive these privileges. The benefits of white privilege
include greater access to power and resources, the ability to make decisions that
affect everyone without taking others into account, and the ability to discount the
experiences of individuals of color (Kendall, 2001).
The beliefs related to white privilege influence our perceptions of our clients
and their experiences. Being aware of the privileges granted to members of the dom-
inant group and the related disadvantages of members of minority groups can help
you understand the experiences of both the dominant and minority groups. Some
practitioners might feel shame, guilt, and/or denial in response to the idea of white
privilege. As a practitioner you need to be aware of the potential effects of white
privilege or institutionalized biases on your client’s life and situation. By increas-
ing your awareness and sensitivity to white privileges, you will be better able to
empathically join with your client and to appreciate your client’s worldview.
HOMEWORK EXERCISE 1.4 BENEFITS FOR DOMINANT GROUPS
Make a list of at least five benefits that members of the dominant group have simply because of their race.
INFLUENCE OF GENDER
Cowritten by Kathy Lay
Of the numerous factors that influence how we view ourselves, gender is one
of the most important. Throughout history, a common question for a pregnant
woman is speculation about whether the baby is a girl or a boy. Today technology
allows parents to have this information in advance of the baby’s birth so they can
plan. Part of the planning process involves applying the social and cultural norms
to signify the gender of the child, such as color of the nursery, décor, and clothing,
and choosing the name. Gender influences interpretations of movements in utero,
how the future child is addressed, and how others treat the baby from the moment
of birth. For example, at birth, a baby girl is wrapped in pink and a baby boy in
blue. Ways in which a baby is described may include: “Isn’t she sweet? for a
girl and “He’s a little linebacker,” for a boy. Although not intended to be harmful,
these ways of behaving toward a male or female child are a part of the social con-
struction of gender that determines what is considered normal gender behavior
for boys and girls.
A person’s sex is determined based on genitals. “Gender is present in our lives
from the time our genitals are first discernible—often in utero” (Burdge, 2007,
p. 245) and has broad consequences on the future of the child. From a social con-
text, gender pertains to what our culture teaches is true or will be true of someone
who is biologically female or male, including societal beliefs, stereotypes, and in-
grained views about what is assumed to be the fundamental nature of boys and
girls, women and men. Everything from appropriate toys to clothes, schooling, and
behaviors are understood and planned based on gender. This does not take into
account the diversity of other cultures, biology, and neurochemistry.
Gender stereotypes prescribe roles, how a person should respond to life
circumstances, and whether a behavior is considered pathological or adaptive.
Anger, sadness, fear, and happiness are all human responses, but some may be more
acceptable based on the gender of the individual expressing the emotion. The social
construction of gender continues throughout our lives and influences choices, access
to resources, and ultimately, quality of life through the life cycle.
Some individuals feel uncomfortable with their assigned sex based on their genitalia.
Transgender refers to individuals who do not identify with or conform to the gender
roles assigned to their sex. Some individuals who are transgendered become transsexual,
meaning they choose to change their body surgically and/or with hormones in order to
align their body with their chosen gender. Understanding these descriptions of gender is
crucial to self-understanding and doing effective work with clients. Terms such as gen-
der nonconforming have emerged to include individuals who choose not to be limited
by culturally constructed constraints and stereotypes of gender.
Gender bias in counseling occurs when individuals do not examine their beliefs
and stereotypes. The use of gender stereotypes as the standard for defining adaptive
or healthy behavior and good psychological functioning may lead the practitioner
to define certain behaviors as aberrant. They may see sensitivity in men as a form
of dependency and sadness in women as more acceptable or manageable than anger
(Chao, 2012). Practitioners who believe in the importance of equal relationships
between men and women may encourage couples to collaboratively explore and
customize roles, family work, sexual relations, and the management of money, all of
which are influenced by how we construct gender. However, not all cultures support
couple collaboration and social change around gender roles.
HOMEWORK EXERCISE 1.5 GENDER INFLUENCES
Reflect and examine your perception of your what ways has it enhanced your options? What were
own gender. Do you see yourself as strong, weak, the different expectations for the men and women in
emotional, thoughtful, adventurous, empathic, your family related to moving away from the family,
careful, fearful, curious, skillful, or independent? going to college, going to graduate school, staying
Identify the characteristics commonly associated home with children, and caring for elderly parents?
with male and female gender. In what ways has your Name three ways your life might have been different
gender limited or restricted your options and in if you were a member of the other gender.
INFLUENCE OF SEXUAL ORIENTATION

Written by Kathy Lay
Sexual orientation is another powerful determinate of who we are and how we
respond to others. Sexual orientation is the direction or directions of one’s sexual,
affectionate, emotional, cultural, or loving attraction on a continuum from only
12 Chapter 1
same-sex attraction to only opposite-sex attraction. Bisexual people experience

attraction to both genders. Individual sexual activity does not confirm sexual orien-
tation. For example, in some Middle Eastern countries there is a practice involving
using young boys who are dressed as girls as entertainment and sexual partners
for men in the military. If available these men might prefer opposite sex partners.
Some men who have heterosexual lifestyles and do not identify as gay also have sex
with men. Sexual identity, orientation, preference, fantasies, and behavior are on a
broad spectrum.
Embedded in our sexual orientation are societal beliefs, stereotypes, and views
about relational and sexual expression. Recent research indicates sexual orientation
is determined by psychological influences (Friedman & Downey, 2008; Zhu, Ren,
Cao, Wu, & Zhu, 2013). Many people experience their sexual orientation as a natu-
ral developmental process in which they are encouraged and supported throughout
their psychosocial–psychosexual development regardless of whether they are het-
erosexual, lesbian, or gay. Others identify their sexual orientation, or “come out,”
later in life due to a variety of factors including family, religious, and/or cultural
prohibitions about recognizing or acknowledging homosexual feelings.
The coming out process is complicated by social and cultural constraints
experienced due to heterosexism and/or homophobia. Heterosexism is a belief that
male–female sexuality is the only natural, normal, or moral mode of sexual behavior
(Morrison & Dinkel, 2012). Heterosexism legitimizes only traditional assumptions
and stereotypes about male–female relationships (Harris, 2010). Homophobia is an
individualized fear and hatred for homosexuals (Gergen & Davis, 2013; Madureira,
2007). Behaviors associated with homophobia have manifested in a broad range of
oppressive acts from covert activities to verbal aggression and violence (Tomsen,
2006; Tully, 2000). It is institutionalized in most systems and manifests in cultural
behaviors and norms (Morrow & Messinger, 2006).
Gays and lesbians now have the right to marry, a contractual relationship ac-
knowledged by the state and federal governments. However, in many states, gays
and lesbians can be married one day and fired from their job the next, lose their
housing, and be denied other rights because many states still do not have equal
protection under the law (Barron & Hebl, 2013). As of 2015, 19 states and DC
prohibit discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity. However,
47% of LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender) Americans report having
experienced some form of discrimination in the workplace (Human rights Cam-
paign, 2015). This lack of full equality under the law serves to maintain bias and
harmful stereotypes that lead to emotional, psychological, and spiritual trauma for
LGBT. It is important to understand how these harmful biases affect LGBT indi-
viduals. For example, negative attitudes toward LGBT youth leads to bullying,
violence, and higher suicide rates as compared to heterosexual youth (Center for
Disease Control, 2014).
The helping professions are not immune to the influence of heterosexism and
homophobia. Examples of heterosexism and homophobia include forms constructed
for intake and assessment purposes that reflect only heterosexual relationships, ex-
clusive definitions of family, and agency policies that do not honor alternative mar
mar-
riages or partnership/family constructions. Gays and lesbians are often the brunt
of jokes, even among professionals, that reinforce stereotypes and bias. Regard-
less of the orientation of the practitioner, heterosexism and homophobia may be
operational in his or her worldview. Effective practitioners have both awareness
and knowledge of the impact of heterosexism and homophobia on themselves and
others. This awareness will lead to deconstruction of bias and to respectful practices
with others from diverse backgrounds. Attendance to our bias is a lifelong learning
process that will result in skillful and respectful interactions with clients.
HOMEWORK EXERCISE 1.6 SEXUAL ORIENTA

IENTA
IENTA
ATION
TION INFLUENCES
When were you first aware of someone with a sexual experiences did you have in high school related to
orientation different from your own orientation? sexual orientation biases?
What was your reaction to this awareness? What
INFLUENCE OF SOCIOECONOMIC STATUS

Written by Carolyn Gentle-Genitty
Socioeconomic status is the position in the social hierarchy that is attributed to in-
dividuals, families, and groups, based on variables such as income, occupation, and
education. “Socioeconomic status is used as a way to think about economic, social,
and political relationships involved in the production, control, and distribution of
wealth” (Mahoney, 2003, p. 803). For example, people qualify for public assistance
and/or certain benefits if their income is below an established poverty line.
Influences of socioeconomic status include more than income or class structure
and extend beyond individuals to generations. In most instances if your family has
a history of wealth, you and others in your family will be more likely to have access
to resources and advantages such as travel, quality education, and enhanced devel-
opmental experiences like music lessons, scouting, and so on. In contrast, if your
family history is such that you have been and continue to live below the poverty
line, you may continue to have limited resources.
Several researchers have documented many areas where socioeconomic status in-
fluences daily life including but not limited to impacts in quality of health care, dis-
parity in health care access, obesity, education, housing, childcare and development,
and behaviors (Chen & Miller, 2013; Sirin, 2005; Walsh & Kosson, 2007). Most of
the studies on socioeconomic status point to the disparity in health care. Those with
higher socioeconomic status have healthier diets and lifestyles and better access to
good health care and as a result enjoy better overall health and longer lives (Braveman,
Cubbin, Egerter, Williams, & Pamuk, 2010; Chen & Miller, 2013; Shavers, 2007).
Poverty and lower socioeconomic status affect access to education, community
resources, social services, employment, and housing especially in regard to peo-
ple of color (Everson, Maty, Lynch, & Kaplan, 2002; Starfield, 2006). Specifically,
Everson et al. (2002) reported that “data from the studies demonstrate that the
effects of economic disadvantage are cumulative with the greatest risk of poor men-
tal and physical health among those who experienced sustained hardship” (p. 891).
The socioeconomic status influences each of us and our clients in many
significant ways. Dodge, Pettit, and Bates (1994) argue that socioeconomic class is
ingrained and influences how we socialize and evaluate our experiences. We tend to
relate more comfortably with people from the same socioeconomic class. We may
view those of higher socioeconomic status as somehow better and more powerful
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– Igen, elment végleg… Elküldtem.
– Elküldted?… Julcsát?… Megbolondultál?
– Igen, elküldtem, mert szemtelen volt… és mert… a gyerekkel
rosszul bánt.
– Julcsa?
– Igen… Julcsa.
– És mennyiben volt szemtelen? Kit sértett meg, ha szabad
kérdenem?
– Téged.
– Engem?
– Igen… A vacsora odaégett s te nem jöttél…
– És ő megjegyzéseket tett?…
– Megjegyzéseket tett rád vonatkozólag. Oly tiszteletlenül
nyilatkozott, hogy nem tűrhettem… Nem volt szabad tűrnöm…
– Ugyan miket mondott?
– Szükségtelen ismételni.
– De tudni akarom.
– Azt mondotta, hogy szerencsétlen dolog volt feleségül vennem
olyan asszonyt, mint te, aki pontatlan, rendetlen, gondatlan… rossz
háziasszony, rossz anya és rossz feleség…
A fiatal asszony az előszobába lépett Limousintől követve, aki e
váratlan helyzetben szót sem tudott szólni. Az ajtót becsapta maga
után, köpenyét székre dobta és magánkívül rohant férjére:
– Mit mondsz? Mit mondsz? Azt mondod, hogy én…
Parent sápadtan, de nyugodtan állt helyén.
– Semmit sem mondok, kedvesem, – válaszolta. – Csupán
ismétlem Julcsa szavait úgy, amint óhajtottad és hangsúlyozom,
hogy éppen e szavak miatt dobtam ki őt.
Az asszony remegett a dühtől s legjobban szerette volna férje
szakállát kitépni s arcát összekarmolni. Hanghordozásából,
magaviseletéből a lázadást nyilván kiérezte, de szavaira nem volt
mit felelnie. Más alkalmat keresett, hogy közvetlen, sértő szóval újra
megkezdje a harcot.
– Vacsoráztál? – kérdezte.
– Nem, vártam rád.
Türelmetlenül húzta föl vállát.
– Ostobaság fél nyolcnál tovább várni. Gondolhattad, hogy
akadályozva vagyok, hogy fontos elintézni valóim, hogy
bevásárlásaim voltak.
De egyben sajátságos szükségét érezte annak, hogy
részletesebben elmondja, mire fordította idejét. Elmesélte rövid
mondatokban, amelyekből a sértődöttség kiérződött, hogy nagyon
messze, a Rue de Rennesban, néhány bútordarabot kellett
megnéznie. Visszafelé jövet, hét óra után, a Boulevard Saint-
Germainen találkozott Limousinnel s minthogy roppant éhes volt,
vele vendéglőbe ment, ahová különben egyedül nem tartotta volna
illőnek belépni. Így történt, hogy Limousinnel vacsorázott, ha ugyan
ezt vacsorának lehet nevezni; csupán levest és félcsirkét evett,
annyira sietett a hazatéréssel.
Parent zavartalan nyugalommal válaszolta: – Nagyon jól tetted.
Nem teszek érte szemrehányást.
Limousin, aki idáig Henriette háta mögött némán állott, előlépett
és barátjának kezét nyujtotta:
– Hogy vagy?
Parent lágyan viszonozta keze szorítását: – Köszönöm, nagyon
jól.
A fiatal asszony azonban férje utolsó szavait nem hagyhatta
megjegyzés nélkül:
– Szemrehányást?… Miért beszélsz szemrehányásról?… Azt
hiszem, valamit forralsz ellenem…
– Szó sincs róla, – mentegetőzött Parent. – Csupán annyit
akartam mondani, hogy késedelmezésed miatt nyugtalan voltam; de
ezt nem akarom bűnül felróni neked.
Az asszony fagyos büszkeséggel, veszekedést keresve
válaszolt: – Késedelmezésem miatt?… Igazán jó! Mintha éjfél után
egy óra lenne s én az éjszakát kint töltöttem volna!
– Dehogy is, kedvesem. Azt mondottam, hogy »késedelmezés«,
mert erre más szót nem tudok. Úgy volt, hogy félhétkor jössz haza s
te félkilenckor érkeztél. Ez késedelem! Nagyon érthetőnek tartom,
nem is… csodálkozom rajta… De… hiszen beláthatod… más szót
nem alkalmazhatok.
– Igen, de úgy hangsúlyozod a szót, mintha a szeretőmnél
háltam volna…
– Ugyan kérlek… Hogy is mondhatsz ilyet?…
Az asszony látta, hogy férje a pörlekedés elől visszavonul, ezért
már éppen szobájába készült, mikor meghallotta, hogy a kis György
sír. Felindultan támadt férjére.
– Mi baja Gyurikának?
– Mondtam már, hogy Julcsa nyersen bánt vele.
– Mit csinált vele a vén dög?
– Ó, ne nyugtalankodj! Kicsit megtaszította s a fiúcska leesett.
Látni akarta gyerekét s az ebédlőbe rohant. A borral végigöntött
asztal, a feldöntött sótartó s az üvegcserepek láttára azonban
méltatlankodva állt meg:
– Micsoda tatárjárás ez itt?
– Julcsa, kérlek szépen, ő…
Dühösen vágott szavába:
– Ez már igazán sok! Ez a teremtés rossz személynek híresztel
engem, a gyerekemet megveri, edényeimet összetöri, a házamat
feldúlja… és te ezt mind természetesnek találod!
– Egyáltalában nem… Azért küldtem el.
– De drága vagy! Elküldted?… Le kellett volna tartóztatni!
Ilyenkor egy férfi rendőrt hivat!…
Parent csak hebegni tudott: – Kedvesem… ez nem állt
módomban… ilyet… erre nem volt ok… Nem, az ilyesmi nem ment
volna…
Az asszony végtelen megvetéssel húzta föl vállát:
– Tudod mit? Soha, de sohasem leszel te más, mint gyáva
anyámasszony katonája, mint puha, nyálas, összetiporható csiga! Jó
Isten, ugyan mi mindent vághatott arcodba az a bestia, hogy ki
merted dobni őt. Szerettem volna itt lenni, ha csak egy percig is!
Felrántotta a vendégszoba ajtaját, Gyurihoz rohant s karjaiba
véve a gyermeket, szenvedélyesen csókolgatta: – Gyurikám, pici kis
szentem, mi bajod? Mondd, egyetlenem!
A gyermek anyja karjai közt elhallgatott. Az asszony újra
kérdezte:
– Mi bajod, drága galambocskám?
A kis Gyuri, aki az iménti jelenetben a rémülettől jól látni sem
tudott, szepegve felelt:
– A papát megvejte a Julcsa.
Henriette először meglepetten nézett vissza urára, de aztán
bolond nevetési vágy buggyant fel szemében, szaladt végig, mint
borzongás, finom arcán, ajkát felemelte, orrcimpáit szétfeszítette s
végül kicsattant szájából az örömnek, a vidámságnak hangos,
csengő hangfüzéreként, mint valami levegőbe ijesztett, felröppenő
madársereg. Ragyogó fogai közül a gonosz vihogás szótagokra
szelve bocsátotta ki a szavakat, amelyek mindegyike mérges
harapásként hatott Parent érzékeny lelkére: »Ha! ha! ha!… meg-
vert!… ő… té-ged! ha, ha, ha! Mi-lyen fur-csa! Hall-ja, Li-mou-sin?…
Julcsa megverte… Ha, ha, ha… Az u-ra-mat!… Kitűnő!…
Parent igyekezett tiltakozni:
– Dehogy!… Nem igaz… Ellenkezőleg, én dobtam oly erővel az
ebédlőbe, hogy az asztalt felborította. A gyerek nem jól látta. Én
vertem meg a Julcsát!
Henriette fiához fordult: – Mondd még egyszer, kis bogaram.
Julcsa verte meg a papát?
A gyerek bólintott: – Igen, ő vejte meg…
Aztán hirtelen más jutott az asszony eszébe: – De ez a gyerek
még nem is evett!… Kaptál már vacsorát, édesem?
– Nem, mamuka.
Nyersen kiáltott urára: – De hát megőrültél? Fél kilenc s ez a
gyerek még nem vacsorázott!
Parent kifáradva a heves jelenetekbe, megtörve eddigi élete
összeomlásától, zavartan mentegetőzött:
– Rád vártunk, kedvesem. Nem akartam nélküled vacsorázni.
Minthogy minden este későn jössz haza, nem tudhattam, hogy
melyik pillanatban érkezel.
Az asszony kalapját, amely eddig fején volt, székre dobta és
idegesen fakadt ki:
– Borzasztó együtt élni emberekkel, akik semmit sem értenek
meg, semmit sem találnak ki, akik maguktól egy lépést sem mernek
tenni. Ha éjfélkor jöttem volna haza, a gyerek biztosan éhesen
feküdt volna le. Mintha oly nehéz lenne megérteni, hogy ha fél
nyolcig nem jövök, bizonyára fontos, előre nem látott dolog tart
vissza!…
Parent megremegett. Érezte, hogy a harag újra ellepi; de
Limousin közbelépett s rászólt a fiatal asszonyra:
– Kedves Henriette, maga nagyon igazságtalan. Parent nem
találhatta ki, hogy maga oly későn jön haza. Tudtommal ez még nem
fordult elő. Meg aztán, minthogy Julcsát elküldte, egymaga ki sem
kászmálódhatott a bajból…
Henriette ingerülten jegyezte meg: – Már pedig csak
kászmálódjék ki egyedül. Én ugyan nem segítek neki. Ő csinálta, ő
igya meg a levét.
E szavakkal mérgesen szobájába ment s azt is elfelejtette, hogy
fia még nem evett.
Limousin a legnagyobb buzgalommal sietett barátja segítségére.
A tört üvegeket és tányércserepeket az asztalról leszedte, a terítéket
rendbehozta és a gyermeket hosszúlábú karosszékecskéjébe
ültette, amíg Parent a szobalányt kerítette elő.
A szobalány csodálkozó arccal lépett be. György szobájába, ahol
dolgozott, a családi jelenetek zaja nem hallatszott be.
Felszolgálta a levest, az odaégett ürücombot s utána
burgonyapirét.
Parent gyermeke mellett ült. Feje bódult volt, elméje a
nagyhullámú eseményeken erőtlenül vergődött. Adott enni fiának s
maga is falatozni kezdett. Gépiesen vágta a húst, szórakozottan
rágta s mikor nyelni akart, minden erejét össze kellett szednie,
mintha torka összehorpadt volna.
Leküzdhetetlen vágy ébredt benne, hogy Limousint, aki szemben
ült vele és kenyérlabdacsokat gyúrt, jól szemügyre vegye. Látni
akarta, hogy hasonlít-e Györgyhöz? De nem merte szemét felemelni.
Egyszer csak mégis elhatározta magát és rámeredt az ismerős
arcra, amely e percben olyannak tűnt föl előtte, mintha sohasem
látta volna. Sokáig nem állta a nézést, tekintetét minduntalan elkapta
s ellesve egy-egy vonalat, egy-egy kifejezést, tüstént gyermeke felé
fordult. Úgy tett, mintha etetné, holott arcán a hasonlóságot kereste.
Két szó visszhangzott lázasan fülében: »Gyuri apja! Gyuri apja!
Gyuri apja!« E szavak zsongtak halántéka körül szívének minden
egyes verésére. Igen, ez az ember, aki az asztal másik végén oly
nyugodtan ül, talán Gyurinak, az ő édes kis Gyurijának apja. Letette
a kést, villát: nem tudott enni. Éles, kegyetlen fájdalom sajgott végig
egész testén, azok közül való, amelyektől az ember a földre dobja
magát, a bútorokat harapja és üvölt, mint sakál. Kedve lett volna a
kést hasába szúrni. Ettől megkönnyebbült volna. Ezzel mindent
befejezett volna.
Mert hogyan éljen már ezentúl? Felkelhet-e reggel, asztalhoz
ülhet-e, lefekhet-e és alhat-e egész éjszaka, amikor folyton ez a
gondolat kísérti: »A György apja Limousin!« Nem, nem lesz többé
ereje, hogy egy lépést is tegyen, hogy felöltözzék, hogy akármire is
gondoljon, akárkivel is beszéljen! Minden nap, minden órában,
minden percben felvetődnék benne a kérdés és tudni akarná,
igyekeznék kitalálni, kinyomozni a rettenetes titkot. És kicsinyét, az ő
édes kis gyermekét nem láthatná már többé anélkül, hogy a szörnyű
kétely föl ne ébredjen benne, hogy a fájdalom szíve gyökeréig ne
nyilaljon. Itt, ebben a házban kellene tovább élnie egy gyermek
mellett, akit gyűlölne és imádna is egyszerre! Igen, a végén még
meggyűlölné. Milyen pokol! Ó, ha legalább biztos lenne, hogy
Limousin az apja! Akkor talán megnyugodnék s fájdalmát
könnyebben tudná legyűrni. De a kétség megöli!
Semmit sem tudni biztosan, örökké csak nyugtalankodni,
szenvedni és csókolni másnak gyermekét, sétálni vinni, karon
hordani, érezni ajkain finom hajának cirógatását, imádni őt és
mindig-mindig arra gondolni: »Talán nem is az enyém vagy?…«
Nem sokkal jobb lenne többé nem is látni, elhagyni, elveszteni az
uccán vagy elmenekülni tőle messze, nagyon messze, hogy többé
hírt se halljon felőle?
Az ajtónyitásra felugrott helyéről. Felesége jött be a szobába.
– Éhes vagyok, – jelentette ki. – És maga, Limousin?
Limousin habozva válaszolt:
– Hát bizony, én is.
Visszarendelték az ürücombot.
Parentban felvetődött a kérdés: »Együtt vacsoráztak-e, vagy
szerelmi találkájukon időztek oly soká?«
Mind a ketten farkasétvággyal ettek. Henriette egészen nyugodt
volt. Nevetgélt, tréfálgatott. Férje bátortalanul, lopva vetett rá egy-
egy pillantást. Fehér csipkével díszített rózsaszínű pongyola volt
rajta. Szép telt arca, üde nyaka és húsos keze a kacér, illatos
ruhából úgy siklott elő, mint színes kagylójából a csiga.
Vajjon mit csináltak egész nap együtt? Látta őket öszefonódva,
szerelmes szavakat suttogva! Hogyan lehetett idáig oly ostoba?
Hogy nem látott meg mindent, amikor így szemben ültek vele
egymás mellett?
Mennyit gúnyolódhattak rajta, mikor már első naptól fogva rútul
becsapták? Hát lehetséges az, hogy tisztességes emberrel ily csúfot
űzzenek csak azért, mert az apja kis pénzt hagyott rá? Hogy nem
lehet az ilyen szennyes dolgokat a lélekben meglátni? Miért van az,
hogy a tisztaszívű emberek előtt a gonoszlelkűek mesterkedéseit
semmi sem árulja el, hogy ugyanaz a hang tud imádni, amelyik
hazudik, hogy a sanda tekintet éppen olyan, mint a nyilt, őszinte
tekintet?
Vizsgálta őket s lesett áruló mozdulatra, szóra, hangsúlyra.
Hirtelen elhatározta: »Ma este rajtuk ütök!« Feleségéhez fordult:
– Kedvesem, minthogy Julcsát elküldtem, kénytelen vagyok még
ma este másik szolgálót keresni. Ha most rögtön megyek, holnap
reggelre talán már találok is egyet. Lehet, hogy későbben jövök
haza.
– Menj csak – mondta az asszony. – Én itthon maradok.
Limousin addig szórakoztat. Megvárjuk, míg hazajössz.
Aztán a szobalánynak rendelkezett:
– Fektesse le Gyurit, szedje le az asztalt s menjen maga is
aludni.
Parent felállt az asztaltól. Térdei inogtak.
– Mingyárt itt leszek, – morogta, s amíg kiment, a falnak
támaszkodott, mert a parkett hullámzott alatta.
Gyurit elvitte a szobalány. Henriette és Limousin átmentek a
vendégszobába. Alig csukódott be az ajtó, Limousin az asszonyra
támadt:
– Elment az eszed, drágám, hogy férjedet így kínozod?
Henriette megvetéssel fordult vissza:
– Kérlek, kissé unalmasnak találom, hogy Parent-t nekem
minduntalan vértanunak állítod be.
Limousin karszékbe vetette magát s lábait egymásra dobta:
– Egyáltalában nem állítom be vértanunak, de mégis
nevetségesnek találom, hogy helyzetünkben ezzel az emberrel
reggeltől-estig kötődjél.
Az asszony a kandallóról cigarettát vett, rágyujtott, aztán
nyugodtan mondta:
– Én nem kötődöm vele. Ép ellenkezőleg. De az ostobasága
felbőszít… Úgy bánok vele, ahogy megérdemli.
Limousin türelmetlenül vágott szavába:
– Lehetetlenül viselkedsz vele szemben! Különben e tekintetben
ti asszonyok mind egyformák vagytok. Hát nincs igazam? Itt van ez
a derék, jószívű fiú, kinek a bizalma és az előzékenysége az
ostobasággal határos. Nem gyanakszik ránk, nem zavar bennünket;
tőle tehetünk, amit akarunk. Te pedig mindent elkövetsz, hogy
felbőszítsd és nyugodt életünket megzavard.
Henriette kiesve a játszott nyugalomból, haraggal támadt
Limousinre:
– Hagyj békét! Utállak téged is! Te is olyan gyáva vagy, mint a
többi férfi! Félsz ettől a hülyétől!
Limousin székéről felugrott és karjait szétvetve kiáltotta:
– Mondd meg, miben járt ártalmadra? Miért haragszol rá?
Szerencsétlenné tesz? Megver? Megcsal? Nem, ez már igazán sok!
Kínozod ezt a fiút, mert túlságosan jó és haragszol rá pusztán azért,
– mert felszarvazod.
Az asszony egészen közel ment Limousinhez és mélyen a
szemébe nézett:
– Te veted szememre, hogy megcsalom őt? Te? Éppen te? Na
hát ehez piszkosság kell!
Limousin szégyenlős megjuhászkodással védekezett:
– De édesem, nem vetek én semmit sem a szemedre. Csak arra
kérlek, hogy kíméld őt egy kevéssé. Mindkettőnknek szükségünk
van bizalmára. Ezt meg kell értened.
Közvetlen közelségben álltak egymással szemben: a magas,
barna férfi, illatos pofaszakállával s kissé közönséges nőhódítói
megjelenésével s a kis szőke, rózsaszínű asszony, a félig polgár,
félig kokott párizsi asszony, aki valamely kis bolt küszöbén
nevelkedett fel és csábító tekintetét a járókelőkön próbálta ki. Így
ismerkedett meg férjével, a jámbor sétálóval, aki minden reggel és
minden este elmenvén előtte, bátortalan szemét a lány rőfös
kacérságán végleg ottfelejtette.
– Hát nem tudod megérteni, te nagy mafla, – mondta az asszony
már békülékenyebben, – hogy éppen azért gyűlölöm, mert elvett,
mert megvásárolt és mert minden, amit mond, vagy tesz, az
idegeimet tépázza? Kétségbe ejt a butasága, amit te jóságnak hívsz;
az esetlensége, amit bizalomnak mondsz; és végül gyűlölöm,
utálom, mert ő a férjem s nem te! Akármilyen kevéssé is zavar,
mindig magunk között érzem. Csókjaink, öleléseink közé tolakodik
szüntelen. Meg aztán?… Ej, mit! Oly ostoba, oly rettenetesen
ostoba, hogy még nem is gyanakszik! Ha legalább kicsit féltékeny
volna! Vannak pillanatok, amikor szeretném a szemébe mondani:
»Hát nem látod, te szerencsétlen, nem fogod fel ésszel, hogy Pál a
szeretőm?«
Limousin felkacagott:
– Nagyon jó!… De mégis jobban teszed, ha hallgatsz és békés
életünket nem kavarod fel.
– Menj már! Egy ilyen baromtól nincs mit tartani! Nem vesz ez
észre semmit!… De engem idegesít, nem is sejtheted, hogy mily
mértékben idegesít! Te persze mindig dédelgeted, udvarolsz neki, a
kezét baráti őszinteséggel szorongatod… Ó, ti férfiak, némely
dologban oly különösek vagytok.
– Színlelni kell, kicsikém.
– Nem erről beszélek. A ti érzelmeitekről. Ti a férfit, akit
megcsaltok, mintha egyszerre jobban kezdenétek szeretni; mi
asszonyok gyűlöljük attól a pillanattól kezdve, amikor megcsaltuk.
– Nem látom át, hogy miért kellene egy derék embert gyűlölni,
akinek az ember a feleségét elcsábítja?
– Nem látod át?… Nem látod át?… Hisz éppen ez a finomság
hiányzik belőletek! Minek is beszéljek róla? Az ilyent meg kell érezni,
megértetni nem lehet… Meg aztán, nem tartozol-e?… De hagyjuk!
Kár az időt vesztegetni ilyesmivel. Nektek férfiaknak rinócerosz-
bőrötök van.
És mosolyogva, a sok élményen átviharzott nő szelíd
megvetésével, vállára tette két fehér kezét és ajkát feléje nyujtotta. A
férfi hozzáhajolt, karjai közé szorította s ajkuk egybeforrt. A kandaló
tükre előtt álltak, úgyhogy a márványoszlopos álló-óra mögött a
tükörben képmásuk velük együtt ölelkezett.
Mit sem hallottak: sem a kulcs fordulását, sem az ajtó
nyikorgását; egyszerre csak Henriette élesen felsikoltott s Limousin
karjaiból kiszakította magát: előttük állt halálsápadtan Parent,
összeszorított ököllel, cipő nélkül s homlokába húzott kalapja alól
szeme rájuk meredt.
Az őrültek szúrós, villogó tekintetével nézte hol egyiket, hol
másikat, anélkül, hogy fejét megmozdította volna. Egy pillanatig
szótlanul, a földbegyökerezve állt, aztán hirtelen Limousinre ugrott,
karjai közé kapta, mintha meg akarná fojtani s oly hatalmas
lendülettel taszította meg, hogy az elvesztve a talajt lába alól,
verdeső karokkal hátrált s már-már koponyájával a szoba falának
esett.
De Henriette, amikor látta, hogy ura szeretőjének életére tör,
rávetette magát férjére s az eszeveszett nőstény természetfölötti
erejével mind a tíz fényes, csiszolt, hegyes körmét oly mélyen
belevájta Parent nyakába, hogy tarkója alatt vére kibuggyant.
Közben beleharapott vállába is, mintha fogaival cafatokra akarta
volna tépni. Az asszony markai közt fuldokló Parent eleresztette
Limousint, lerázta magáról nyakába kapaszkodó feleségét s a
derekánál fogva fölemelve, a vendégszoba túlsó végébe hajította.
Azután, minthogy a gyönge embereknek rövidlélekzetű,
önkívületes haragja forrt benne, lihegve, kimerülten állt meg a kettő
között s nem tudta tovább, hogy mit csináljon. Állati dühe a
rendkívüli erőfeszítésben szétfolyt, mint kibontott pezsgő habja a
palackon. Szokatlan erélyessége lélekzetvesztő tehetetlenségben
múlt ki.
Ahogy végre szóra talált, akadozva hörögte:
– Takarodjatok… mind a ketten… tüstént… takarodjatok!…
Limousin nem moccant a sarokban, ahová a rémület szegezte.
Henriette szétzilált hajjal, meztelen kebellel állt; összeszorított öklét
a szalónasztalra támasztotta, fejét előreszegte, mint az ugrásra kész
nőstényfarkas.
Parent most erősebb hangon, magából kikelve ordította:
– Takarodjatok mingyárt… Takarodjatok!…
Felesége látván, hogy kétségbeesett ereje lelankadt,
kiegyenesedett, pár lépést tett feléje s már majdnem szokott
arcátlanságával kérdezte:
– Elment az eszed?… Mi lelt hirtelen?… Mit jelent ez a
minősíthetetlen orvtámadás?…
Parent fölemelt ököllel fordult felé:
– Hallgass!… Te nyomorult… te… te szajha! Mindent
hallottam!… mindent!… mindent!… Nyomorult!… Nyomorult! Aljasok
vagytok mind a ketten!… Ki innen!… Takarodjatok!…
Az asszony megértette, hogy most már vége. A férje mindent
tudott. Lehetetlen a kimagyarázás: engedni kell. De kétségbeejtő
helyzetében gyűlölete férje iránt, ösztönös szemérmetlensége
föltámadt benne s bosszúra, kötődésre hergelte.
Nyugodt, tiszta hangon szólt:
– Jöjjön, Limousin. Minthogy elkergettek, magához megyek.
Limousin azonban nem mozdult. Parent-on új dühroham futott
végig:
– Takarodjatok, nyomorultak!… Takarodjatok!… Mert különben!…
És egy széket kapott fel, amelyet feje fölött megforgatott.
Henriette sietve átment a vendégszobán, megfogta szeretője
karját, akit a félelem a falhoz ragasztott és az ajtó felé húzta
magával:
– Jöjjön, kedvesem, jöjjön… Látja, hogy ez az ember megőrült…
Jöjjön már!…
Az ajtóból még egyszer visszafordult az ura felé s akart még
csinálni, mondani valamit, amivel vérig sebzi, mielőtt elhagyja a
házat. És gonosz, méreggel itatott gondolata támadt, amelyet csak
rút asszonyi ravaszsága sugalmazhatott.
Határozott hangon szólt:
– A gyermekemet magammal akarom vinni.
Parent elámulva hebegte:
– Gyermekedet?… A te gyermekedet?… Még mersz beszélni
róla? Mered… mered követelni őt… azok után… Ó, te nyomorult, te
céda… Erigy!… Erigy!…
Az asszony visszajött hozzá, szemtől-szembe fordult vele s a
sikerült bosszú kéjes mosolya már ajkán terpeszkedett:
– A gyermekemet akarom… Neked nincs jogod visszatartani,
mert nem a tied… Megértetted?… A gyerek nem a tied… A gyerek
Limousiné.
Parent eszét vesztve kiáltotta:
– Hazudsz! Nyomorult, hazudsz!…
Az asszony egészen közel hajolva hozzá sziszegte:
– Ostoba! Az egész világ tudja rajtad kívül. Limousin az apja… Ő
az apja s nem te… Aki a gyerekre néz, mingyárt látja…
Parent szédülve hátrált előle. Azután hirtelen visszafordult,
gyertyát kapott fel s a szomszéd szobába rohant.
Egy pillanat mulva már vissza is tért, karján hozva a paplanjába
burkolt gyereket. A fölébredt, megriadt fiúcska keservesen bőgött.
Parent felesége karjai közé dobta és szót sem szólva tuszkolta őt ki
az ajtón a lépcsőházig, ahol az óvatos Limousin várakozott.
Azután becsukta az ajtót, a kulcsot kétszer ráfordította és
azonkívül elreteszelte. Ereje addig tartott, amíg a vendégszobába
lépett. Ott egész hosszában végigesett a padlón.
II.
Parent egyedül, egészen egyedül élt. A szakítás utáni első
hetekben életének újsága elterelte gyötrő gondolatait. Újra úgy élt,
mint legénykorában: vendéglőben étkezett s napjait céltalan
lődörgéssel töltötte. Minthogy a botrányt kerülni akarta, ügyvédje
által felesége számára tisztességes évjáradékot biztosított.
De gyermekének emléke lassanként kezdte kísérteni. Esténként,
ha egyedül üldögélt otthon, nem egyszer tisztán hallotta Gyuri
hangját, amint kiáltotta: »papa«. Szíve lázasan dobogott, sietve
nyitotta ki a lépcsőház ajtaját s lenézett, hogy vajjon gyermeke nem
jött-e vissza véletlenül? Hiszen visszajöhetne ő is, mint ahogy a
kutyák, vagy a galambok szoktak visszatérni. Miért lenne a
gyermekben kevesebb ösztön, mint az állatban.
De belátva, hogy tévedett, visszaült székébe s a kicsire gondolt.
Néha órákon, napokon keresztül gondolt rá. Nem csupán erkölcsi
kényszer volt ez nála, hanem még inkább testi szükséglet. Ideges,
érzéki vágy kínozta, hogy megcsókolja, karjaiba vegye, játsszon
vele, térdére ültesse, vagy bukfencet hányasson vele. Az elmult
dédelgetések emlékére szívét gyötrő fájdalom szorongatta. Érezte
nyaka köré fonódó meleg kis karjait, kis száját, amint szakállára
nagy csókot cuppant s finom haját, amely arcát csiklandozta. Üde,
illatos bőre, huncutkodó hízelgései után olyan őrült epekedést érzett,
mint imádott asszony után, aki megszökött.
Az uccán szemét ellepte a könny, ha arra gondolt, hogy most az
ő nagy Gyuri fia mellette tipeghetne, mint egykor, amikor sétálni vitte.
Haza kellett mennie s fejét karjába hajtva egész éjszaka zokogott.
Napközben is százszor és százszor fölvetette a kérdést: »Apja-e
vagy nem Györgynek?« De a végenélküli, gyötrő okoskodások
különösen éjszaka kezdődtek. Alighogy lefeküdt, agyában
föltámadtak minden este ugyanazok az érvek s a két lehetőség körül
megindult a kétségbeesett, belső szócsata.
Felesége távozása után szentül hitte, hogy a gyermek Limousiné.
De a bizonyságot lassanként újra habozás váltotta föl. Henriette
szavainak nem lehetett hitelt adni. Kötődött vele, a kétség örvényébe
akarta taszítani. Ha a mellette és ellene szóló bizonyítékokat
higgadtan átgondolta, akkor igen sok reménye lehetett arra, hogy
felesége rosszhiszeműen hazudott.
Egyesegyedül Limousin mondhatná meg a teljes igazságot. De
hogyan lehetne kikérdezni s rábírni, hogy vallomást tegyen?
Néha az éjszaka kellős közepén felöltözködött s eltökélte, hogy
rögtön fölkeresi Limousint s ha kell, kéréssel, könyörgéssel, egész
vagyonának felajánlásával is, de mindenképpen véget vet rettenetes
gyötrelmeinek. De aztán eszébe jutott, hogy Limousin szintén
hazudni fog. Biztosan hazudni fog, csakhogy megakadályozza az
igazi apát gyermekének visszaszerzésében. És megint csak
lefeküdt, hogy észbontó töprengéseit tovább folytassa.
Mit csináljon hát? Semmit!
Kár volt az eseményeket ily durván siettetni. Várni kellett volna
türelmesen két-három hónapig, várni és ügyesen színlelni, hogy
mindenről saját szemével szerezzen közvetlen bizonyságot. Ha azt
hiszik, hogy ő nem gyanakszik, maguktól árultak volna el mindent.
Elég lett volna csak egyetlen egyszer látni a másikat, hogy csókolja
meg a gyermeket s abból mindent megértett volna.
Ó, a barát nem úgy öleli meg a gyereket, mint az apa! Milyen jól
megtehette volna ezt az ajtó mögül! Miért is nem gondolt erre akkor?
Ha Limousin egyedül maradva Györggyel, nem ragadta volna meg
rögtön, nem zárta volna karjai közé, nem csókolta volna meg
szenvedélyesen, ha hagyta volna, hogy játsszék s maga
közömbösen ült volna mellette, akkor nem lett volna semmi kétség:
nem az apja, nem hiszi, nem érzi magát a gyermek apjának!
Milyen jó lett volna akkor! Elkergeti anyját s maradt volna
gyerekkel. Egyedül az édes kisgyerekkel. Ó, milyen boldogság lett
volna!
Verejtékezve, fáradttá gyűrve forgolódott ágyában és igyekezett
visszaemlékezni arra, hogyan bánt Limousin a gyerekkel? De
semmi, semmi sem jutott eszébe. Egy kézmozdulat, egy szó, egy
tekintet sem, egy gyanús csók sem! Meg aztán az anya is alig
törődött a fiúval! Ha a szeretőjétől lett volna, bizosan jobban szerette
volna!
Igen, csak bosszúból, csak kegyetlenségből választották el
gyermekétől. Csak azért, hogy a rajtakapásért megbüntessék.
Elhatározta, hogy kora reggel, amint kinyitják a hivatalokat,
elmegy a kerületi kapitányságra és fiát visszaköveteli.
Alig állapodott azonban meg ebben s már a másik lehetőség,
mint tiszta bizonyosság, meredt elébe. Ha Limousin Henriettenek
első naptól fogva a szeretője, a választott, szenvedéllyel szeretett
férfia volt, akkor bizonyosan neki adta oda magát azzal a hévvel,
azzal a teljes magafeledkezéssel, amely a nőket anyává teszi.
Mindent Limousinnak adott; neki csak hideg csók, vonakodó ölelés,
ellenséges asszonyi test maradt, amely szerelmétől soha meg nem
termékenyülhetett!
Menjen már most, követelje ki, hozza magával, tartsa magánál és
dédelgesse – másnak a gyerekét? Nem tudna ránézni, nem tudná
megcsókolni, nem hallhatná hangját, amikor »apu« – nak szólítja
anélkül, hogy a szörnyű gondolat minduntalan szívébe ne nyilaljon:
»Nem is a te gyermeked!« Önmaga ítélné el magát örökös
szenvedésre, amelyben minden pillanat kínzó hóhéra lehetne! Nem,
akkor már jobb lesz egyedül élnie, egyedül megöregednie és
egyedül meghalnia!
És a rettenetes kétségek és szenvedések, amelyeket semmiféle
ír sem gyógyítani, sem enyhíteni nem tudott, minden nap, minden
éjszaka újra kezdődtek. Különösen az esthomálytól, szürkületek
sivár szomorúságától félt. A leszálló árnyékokból szívére az
elhagyatottságnak, a kétségbeesésnek valóságos záporesője hullt,
amelyben az tehetetlen vergődéssel merült el. Félt gondolataitól,
mint leselkedő gonosztevőktől s üldözött vadként futott előlük. És
rettegett üres, sötét szobáitól is, az elhagyatott, kis uccáktól, ahol
csak itt-ott pislákol egy gázláng s ahol minden magányos járókelő
gyanús csavargónak tűnik fel, aki gyorsítja vagy lassítja lépteit
aszerint, amint hátunk mögött, vagy velünk szembejön.
Parent ösztönszerű menekvéssel kereste a kivilágított, forgalmas
uccákat. A fény és a tömeg vonzotta, lefoglalta, bódította. Mikor
aztán az uccai zsivaj kifárasztotta s a járókelők is ritkultak és kezdtek
kiürülni a nagy körutak, akkor a magánytól és a csendtől való félelem
nagy, fénnyel elöntött, ivókkal zsúfolt sörcsarnokok felé kergette.
Ment, mint lepke a fénybe, leült egy kis kerek asztalhoz és korsó sört
rendelt. Lassan ivott s közben minden távozóra nyugtalan pillantást
vetett. Szerette volna karjuknál fogva visszatartani, maradásra bírni
őket, annyira félt a perctől, amikor a dühös pincér elébe áll s rákiált:
»Zárunk, kérem! Meddig tetszik még itt ülni?«
Mert minden este utolsónak maradt. Végignézte, mint rakják
egymásra az asztalokat, mint oltják ki egymásután a gázlángokat,
míg végre csak kettő égett: az övé és a kasszáé. Kétségbeesve
figyelte a kasszirosnőt, mily gyorsan számolja a pénzt s mikor már a
fiókba zárta, akkor is a takarítónak kellett valósággal kituszkolni
barátságtalan megjegyzések kíséretében:
– Alig lehet a székéről lekaparni! Itt nincs éjjeli menhely!
Amint az elnéptelenedett, sötét uccára lépett, tüstént Györgyre
kellett gondolnia. A visszanyomott gondolat mohón támadott
megkínzott agyvelejére s újra kezdődött a gyötrelmes játék: apja-e
vagy nem gyermekének?
Így szokta meg a kocsmázást; a vendégek iszogatva zsibongtak
körülötte s mindegyikük barátságos, szórakoztató volt: a pipa vastag
füstje tompította nyugtalanságát és a sör nehéz mámora elméjét
kábította, szívét békéltette.
Lassanként itt töltötte egész napját. Ahogy fölkelt, ide jött, hogy
törzsvendégtársain felejtse tekintetét és kínzó gondolatait. Aztán
csupa lustaságból itt is étkezett. Délfelé a söröskorsóval kocogott a
márványasztalon: a pincér fürgén hozott tányért, poharat,
asztalkendőt és a napi ebédet. Étkezés után lassan kiitta kávéját és
szemét már előre kéjjel legeltette a konyakos palackon, amelynek
felejtető nedűje agyát legalább is egy órára elzsibbasztja. Először
csak ajkával érintette az italt s nyelve hegye a csillogó fölületről
csupán az ízt, az arómát szívta föl. Aztán hátravetette fejét s a
poharat cseppenként ürítette szájába. A maró folyadékot lassan
végigfolyatta szájpadlásán, nyeldeklőjén, az arc sikamlós, nyers
visszáján, s a perzselő érintésre előbuggyanó áttetsző nyállal
összekeverte. Az így felhígult keveréket egyszerre nyelte le és
élvezettel figyelte, mint csurog le torkán át egészen a gyomra
mélyére.
Minden étkezés után magába szürcsölgetett így három-négy
pohárkát, ami egy kissé elbódította. A fejét a mellére hajtotta,
szemét lecsukta és álomba szenderült. Egy óra mulva fölébredt és
első mozdulatával a pohár sör után nyúlt, amelyet a figyelmes pincér
még szunyókálása alatt készített elébe. Kiitta, fölnyujtózkodott a
piros bársonydíványról, nadrágját a cipőjéig rázta, mellényét
kikukkanó inge fölé rántotta, kabátja gallérját leporolta, gömbölyű
manzsettáit előhuzogatta és újra helyet foglalva, a már végigolvasott
lapokba mélyedt.
Az első sortól az utolsóig elolvasott mindent újra, az
apróhirdetések rovatait, a tőzsdehireket és színházi műsorokat sem
felejtve ki.
Négytől hatig a körutakon sétált, hogy, amint mondta, levegőt
szippantson. Azután visszajött, a fentartott asztalnál helyet foglalt és
abszintot kért.
A törzsvendégek közül már több ismerőse volt, akikkel
megbeszélte a napi híreket, a különböző eseményeket és politikai
fordulatokat. Az idő eltelt vacsoráig. Estéje épúgy folyt le, mint a
délután, egészen a záróráig. Ekkor következett el a szörnyű pillanat:
ki kellett mennie a sötétbe, haza kellett mennie a kietlen szobába,
ahol rettenetes emlékek, kínzó gondolatok és félelmek várták. Régi
barátai, rokonai közül senkit sem látott. Senkivel sem akart
találkozni, aki mult életére emlékeztette volna.
Végre is ki akarván szakítani magát házi poklából, szép, nagy
szobát bérelt egy forgalmas helyen lévő szállodában. E kirakatos
otthonban többé már nem volt egyedül. Az emberek élete körülötte
zsibongott. Az ablakredőnyök mögül fölhangzott a járókelők
beszéde. És ha a magányos tűzhely és elhagyatott ágya körül a régi
gyötrelmek újra föléledtek, kiment a széles, kivilágított folyosóra,
ahol föl és alá járt, mint ügyeletes pincér. Az ajtók végtelen sora előtt
bánatosan nézett a párosával kitett cipőkre, a csinos, apró női
topánkákra, amelyek szerelmesen hajoltak a nagy férfilábbeliekre.
Az volt az érzése, hogy a zárt ajtók mögött csupa boldog pár alszik.
Szinte látta őket fekhelyük melegében gyöngéden egymáshoz
símulni.
Öt év mult el így. Öt hideg, szerelemtelen esztendő, amelyet
néha pár órás megfizetett ölelések szakítottak meg.
Egy nap aztán, amint a Madeleine és a Drouot ucca között
szokott sétáját végezte, egy nőt pillantott meg, akinek a járása
figyelmét különösképpen lekötötte. Magastermetű úr és kis fiú voltak
társaságában. Tünődve kérdezte: »Hol láttam én ezeket az
embereket?« Az asszonynak egy kézmozdulatát hirtelen fölismerte:
a felesége volt. A felesége, vele Limousin; s a kis gyerek: az ő fia, az
ő kicsi Gyurikája.
A szíve veszettül kalapált. Mégsem állt meg. Látni akarta őket.
Ezért nyomukba lépdelt. Jómódú polgárembereknek látszottak.
Henriette Pál karjára támaszkodott, kedvesen csevegett vele és
néha szerelmesen ránézett. Ilyenkor Parent megpillantotta kedves
arcvonalát, bájosan mosolygó ajkát és melegpillantású szemét. De
különösen gyermeke szívta föl minden figyelmét. Milyen nagy és
erős lett már! Arcát nem láthatta, csupán hosszú szőke haját, amely
csigákban hullt kihajtott, fehér gallérjára. Gyuri lenne vajjon ez a
meztelen térdű, magas gyerek, aki oly nagy komolysággal megy
anyja oldalán, mint valami kis emberke?
Megálltak egy kirakat előtt s Parent most jól szemügyre vehette
őket. Limousin megőszült, arca megöregedett és megsoványodott;
felesége ellenben jobb színben volt, mint valaha: talán kissé meg is
hízott; a legjobban Gyuri változott meg mindhármójuk közül. Parent
alig tudott ráismerni.
Újra megindultak. Parent egy darabig követte őket, majd nagy
lépésekkel elébük vágott, hogy újra visszafordulhasson és szemtől-
szembe láthassa őket. Amint a gyermek mellett elment, őrült vágy

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Developing Helping Skills: A

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TO GET STARTED VISIT

Valerie Nash Chang Carol L. Decker Sheryn T. Scott

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Printed in the United States of America

Chapter 1, Importance of Self-Understanding

Chapter 2, Ways of Understanding and Perceiving Self and Others

Chapter 3, Values, Ethics, and Legal Obligations

Cases in the Instructor’s Manual

INTRODUCTION: THE TEACHING-LEARNING SYSTEM xxv

CHAPTER 1 Understanding Yourself and Others 3

Influence of Disability and Ability 20

CHAPTER 2 Ways of Understanding and Perceiving Self and Others 27

CHAPTER 3 Values, Ethics, and Legal Obligations 51

Professional Competency and Integrity 54

CHAPTER 4 Professionalism and Professional Relationships 73

SECTION 2 BUILDING PROFESSIONAL RELATIONSHIPS 87

CHAPTER 5 DEVELOPING WORKING RELATIONSHIPS 89

CHAPTER 6 FOUNDATIONAL INTERPERSONAL SKILLS 105

CHAPTER 7 Beginning and Ending a Meeting 119

CHAPTER 8 DEMONSTRATING ACTIVE LISTENING 139

SECTION 3 EXPLORING AND ASSESSING WITH CLIENTS 157

CHAPTER 9 USING QUESTIONS 159

Closed-Ended Questions 162

CHAPTER 10 EXPLORING AND DISCOVERING 175

CHAPTER 11 ASSESSING READINESS AND MOTIVATION 191

Homework Exercise 11.3 Reflecting on Social Cognitive Theory 199

SECTION 4 DEFINING THE FOCUS 209

CHAPTER 12 IDENTIFYING KEY PROBLEMS OR CHALLENGES 211

CHAPTER 13 ESTABLISHING GOALS 235

SECTION 5 DOING, EVALUATING, AND ENDING THE WORK 257

CHAPTER 14 TAKING ACTION 259

CHAPTER 15 EVALUATING AND ENDING PROFESSIONAL

APPENDIX A: PRACTICE EVALUATION SCALES 297

APPENDIX B: OVERALL PRACTICE EVALUATION FORM 299

Considerable information is available regarding techniques for working with

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COMPETENCIES IN THE TEXTBOOK

Appropriate use 1 2.5.1, 5.5.2 4

Apply critical 7, 8, 9 Implicit in 4. Problem 7–15

Assessment 7 Interviewing & Counseling, 1.3.1, 2.2.1 4. Problem 11–15

Conditions that Importance 2. Understanding 1 & 2

Develop & 7, 8 2.4.4, 3.3.1 13

Diversity- 2 Diversity & Social and 4.3.2 Throughout

Engagement 6 1.3.6 5–14

Ethics- 1 Ethics Ethical practice 1.5.1 5. Understanding 3

Ethical decision 1 5.4.1 3