Season 1

GOSSIP GIRL Season 1

01. 파일럿

Genre: High-teen, Drama

Producer by: Josh Schwarts, Stephanie Savage

Main Actor: Blake Lively, Leighton Meester, Penn Badgley, Chace Crawford, Edward Westwick,
Kaylee Defer, Kelly Rutherford, Matthew Settle

Transcribed by: Justin

Provided by: https://blog.naver.com/uzupis

GOSSIP GIRL: Hey, Upper East Siders, Gossip Girl here.

And I have the biggest news ever.

One of my many sources, Melanie91, sends us this:

"Spotted at Grand Central, bags in hand, Serena van der

Woodsen."

Was it only a year ago our "it" girl mysteriously

disappeared for...

...quote, "boarding school"? And just as suddenly, she's

back.

Don't believe me? See for yourselves.

Lucky for us, Melanie91 sent proof.

Thanks for the photo, Mel.

Dan, Jenny. Over here.

-Hey, Dad. -Hey, hey, you made it.

Welcome back. How was your weekend? How's your

mom?

-She's fine. JENNY: She's good.

-Fine and good. -She's good and fine.

Like,maybe-I-never- should-have-left-Manhattan fine?

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Or, taking-a-timeout-from-my-marriage- was-the-

best-idea-I-ever-had fine?

Dad, you know what? I'm starving.

Let's go home. I'm cooking.

Caprese salad with a little Mozzarella di Bufala.

Yeah. I'm gonna make you guys some....

GOSSIP GIRL: Spotted: Lonely Boy.

Can't believe the love of his life has returned.

If only she knew who he was.

But everyone knows Serena.

And everyone is talking.

Wonder what Blair Waldorf thinks? Sure, they're BFFs...

...but we always thought Blair's boyfriend, Nate, had a

thing for Serena.

I have to design a dress for this woman. Blair, if you're

gonna wear...

...one of my designs, tell me, so we can at least get it

properly fitted.

Thanks, Mom. I'll keep that in mind.

Great party.

She is my best advertisement.

Nate, have you started thinking about college?

Well, actually, I'm a Dartmouth man.

Yes, Dad's always spoken very highly of Dartmouth.

But I'd like to check out west. You know, maybe USC,
UCLA.

His mother wouldn't hear of it. Dartmouth is far enough

away for her.

Yes, well, Dartmouth is my first choice.

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Excuse me, Captain. Nate, can I borrow you?

Sure. Will you excuse me for a sec?

Nathaniel. Any interest in some fresh air?

-When I get back? -If he gets back.

NATE: What's going on?

I wanna do this. It. Now.

-Now? I thought you wanted to wait. -Not anymore.

GOSSIP GIRL: Better lock it down with Nate, B, clock's

ticking.

God, you'll never believe what's on Gossip Girl.

Someone saw Serena getting off the train at Grand

Central.

Good. Things were getting a little dull around here.

Thank you.

I love you, Nate Archibald.

Always have, always will.

I love you too.

Serena van der Woodsen? Is that you?

Blair, it's Serena.

Serena?

Serena's at school. Kiss me.

No, I just heard your mom say she's here.

Don't you wanna go say "hey"?

Yeah. Totally.

WOMAN 1: I thought she was at boarding school.

WOMAN 2: I heard she's pregnant. WOMAN 3: No,

because she was in rehab. MAN: She looks good.

So I told him, "Forget it. I don't care if it's Murakami, it

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clashes with my sofa."

Mom. Mom.

-Hey. Hey, good to see you. -Oh.

Serena, darling.

So where is he?

-What? They haven't let him out yet? -No. Let's not
discuss that right now.

I thought you might wanna see some of your friends.

Thanks.

-Hi. Serena, so good to see you. -Hi, how are you

doing?

-We're about to have dinner. -I'll set a place for you next
to Blair.

-There's somewhere I have to go. -You're leaving?

Yeah, I just-- I don't feel well. I just wanted to come by

and say "hi."

I'll see you at school tomorrow.

School. So I guess she's back for good.

Didn't you know she was coming?

Of course I did. I just wanted it to be a surprise.

GOSSIP GIRL: Word is that S bailed on B's party in under

90 seconds.

And didn't even have one limoncello.

Has our bad girl really gone good?

Or is it all just part of the act?

Young lady, you can't be here. Visiting hours are over.

I'm family.

He's my brother.

GOSSIP GIRL: Why'd she leave? Why'd she return?

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Season 1

Send me all the detes. And who am I?

That's one secret I'll never tell. The only one.

XOXO, Gossip Girl.

WOMAN: Where has she been?

GOSSIP GIRL: And who am I?

That's one secret I'll never tell.

You know you love me. XOXO...

...Gossip Girl.

ERIC: Serena.

Serena.

Hey. Hey, how are you?

You know. I've been better.

Eric, I know I've been a terrible sister.

I'm just so happy to see you.

-Must be rumors why you're back. -Yeah.

-But none of them mention you. -Just like Mom wants,

huh?

What do I want, baby? For Serena to sleep in her own

bed...

...possibly wearing pajamas.

Morning, Mom. Hey, I was just about to ask the doctor...

...if I could take Eric to breakfast. Wanna come?

No. I think what I'll do is go get him a croissant down the

street.

Serena, don't.

Let me guess. You told everyone Eric's just visiting

Grandpa on Rhode Island.

-Your Aunt Carol in Miami. -So you're actually hiding

him.

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He tries to take his own life. You're worried about Mom

of the Year?

Serena, you've been gone, doing who knows what with

God knows who.

Boarding school was not like that.

As happy as I am to have you home, you have no idea

what it's been like.

-Guess whose dad is cool. -It's a trick question.

Yeah, because it can't be ours.

Ha, ha. Ha, ha. Look at this.

"Top Ten Forgotten Bands of the '90s."

-Yeah, check out who's No. 9. -He's very proud.

Hey. Hey, way to be forgotten.

But that's how you get remembered.

Maybe you'd care if Dad's band was on Gossip Girl.

What? I don't read Gossip Girl. That's for chicks.

So that wasn't your laptop open to it, reading all about

Serena?

Rolling Stone, wow. Let me take a look at this again,

Dad.

-It's very cool. Looking hot, No. 9. -Hey, what are you
working on?

It's called the Kiss on the Lips party. Everyone's going.

You were invited to that?

Well, no offense if I sound surprised, since I've never

been invited.

JENNY: A girl in class saw my calligraphy.

She said if I addressed the invitations, I could have one.

Sounds very fair. Sweatshops could learn a thing or two.

-This is not a platform for your rants. RUFUS: Yes, it is.

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Season 1

-You make us go to private schools. -For education.

We should be anonymous losers and never get invited to

parties.

Works for me.

-Mom thinks it's a good idea. -And her judgment is

always sound?

Jenny, you wanna go to that party, you should go.

You kids could use some fun.

-Nate? -Oh, hey.

Your mom told me you were staying at the Palace.

Yeah, we're renovating again.

You know my mom. If it's not broke, break it.

So, what are you doing here?

I wanted to see how you were. You seemed upset last

night.

I gotta get going and change for school. I'm gonna be

late.

-Serena-- -No. No.

-But you're back now. -I didn't come back for you.

Blair's my best friend and you're her boyfriend...

...and she loves you.

That's the way things are supposed to be.

Serena looked effing hot last night.

There's something wrong with that level of perfection. It

needs to be violated.

-You are deeply disturbed. CHUCK: And yet you know

I'm right.

-If you had the chance-- -I have a girlfriend.

You have been dating since kindergarten and yet you

haven't sealed the deal.

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Who says "seal the deal"?

Come on.

Are you following us or something?

No, I go to your school.

Identical uniforms. Is that kind of a tip-off?

That's funny.

So you guys wanna sit together at lunch?

KATI: So cute. ISABEL: They should be framed or

something.

Not bad work. And here's yours, as promised.

Thanks.

Hey. Here you guys are.

I looked all over the dining hall for you.

Oh, hi, I'm Serena.

I know. I mean, hi, I'm Jen.

Hi.

So...

...when's the party?

Saturday. And you're kind of not invited.

Since, until 12 hours ago, everyone thought you were at

boarding school.

Now we're full. And Jenny used up all the invites.

-Actually-- -You can go now.

-Sorry. -No, it's okay.

I got a lot of stuff to do anyway.

Well, we should get going, then.

Unless you want us to wait for you. Looks like you got a
lot of yogurt left.

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No, go ahead.

Blair, think we could meet tonight?

I'd love to. But I'm doing something with Nate tonight.

The Palace. Eight o'clock?

Nate will wait.

GOSSIP GIRL: Spotted on the steps of the Met: an S and

B power struggle.

I could probably do a half-hour.

GOSSIP GIRL: Did S think she could waltz home and

things would be like they were?

Thanks for making the time.

You're my best friend.

GOSSIP GIRL: Did B think S would go down without a

fight?

Or can these two hotties work it out?

There's nothing Gossip Girl likes more than a good

catfight.

And this could be a classic.

You know, Dad, there's this thing called MySpace...

...where you could post all this information online.

Save some trees, have a blog.

Maybe if musicians got off their blogs and picked up

their guitars...

-...business would be in better shape. -Spoken like a

true relic.

Thanks, son.

Hey, Dad, listen, I gotta run. You gonna be okay?

Yeah. Yeah, your mom will be back. She's always been

a free spirit.

It's one of the reasons I fell for her in the first place.

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I meant with the flyers.

Luckily staple guns are old-school.

-Go. I'm gonna be fine. -All right.

-I talked to the nurse. I'm kidnapping you. ERIC: We're

going shopping?

We're going to Bendel's for an hour. I had a real bad

day.

Really? Because I had a great day.

Couple of pills, Rorschach tests. Green Jell-O for lunch.

Why didn't you save me any?

Come on, we gotta get you out of here before Mom

shows up.

Jenny.

What is it? What's wrong?

Do you like this on me?

Wait a second. Is that why you needed me?

-I thought this was an emergency. -A fashion

emergency.

-I've never been to a big dance before. -Neither have I.

Yeah, but Mom's gone and Dad's allergic to department

stores.

Well, you look good, Jen.

-You do, really. -Thanks.

I mean, too bad it's more than our rent. But I think I can
sew something like it.

Oh, my gosh. It's Serena.

-Hi, Serena. SERENA: Hey.

-Hey, Jenny, right? -Yeah, hi.

-This is my-- -Stylist and personal shopper, Eric. Hi.

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Hi. This is my brother.

So is that your dress for Kiss on the Lips?

Sort of. Speaking of that...

...here. I made you one during free period.

But if anyone asks where you got it, I know nothing.

SERENA: Thanks.

JENNY: Dan? Dan?

SERENA: Jenny.

That dress would look even better in black.

Black. Cool. Thanks.

This is some good stuff.

Yeah, I'm gonna need it. Blair's mom's at the country

house.

Yeah? Well, then maybe I should swipe some of my

Dad's Viagra.

Or my mom's Paxil?

You're finally about to have sex with your girlfriend.

It's like you're headed to your execution.

No, man, I'm good.

Talk to Chuck, buddy. You and Blair have been dating

forever.

-All of a sudden there's a problem? -There's no

problem.

It's just....

Do you ever feel like our whole lives have been planned
out for us?

That we're just gonna end up like our parents?

Man, that's a dark thought.

And aren't we entitled to choose just to be happy?

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Look, easy, Socrates. What we're entitled to is a trust

fund.

A house in the Hamptons, a prescription-drug problem.

But happiness does not seem to be on the menu. So

smoke up...

...and seal the deal with Blair, because you're also

entitled to tap that ass.

So how's your mom doing, with the divorce and

everything?

Great.

So my dad left her for another man.

She lost 15 pounds, got an eyelift. It's been good for

her.

I'm really sorry.

I could tell, since you didn't call or write the entire time
it was happening.

No, I know. I was just.... Boarding school, is like--

I don't know why you went to boarding school to begin

with.

Do you know how it felt...

...calling your house when you didn't show at school,

having your mom say:

"Serena didn't tell you that she moved to Connecticut?"

I just-- I had to go. I just--

I needed to get away from everything.

-Please, just trust me. -How can I trust you...

-...when I feel like I don't know you? -Let's fix that.

I saw you at school with Kati and Is, and I get it.

-I don't want to take any of that away. -Because it's

yours to take if you want.

No, that's not what I mean. I--

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I miss you.

I just want things to go back to the way they used to be.

You know, walking to school together, dancing on tables

at Bungalow.

And night swimming at your mom's country house.

You're like my sister.

You know, and with our families...

...we need each other.

Well, you missed some classic Eleanor Waldorf

meltdowns.

If it wasn't such a tragedy, it would have been funny.

Actually, it kind of was.

Well, I wish I could've been there.

You are now.

I have to meet Nate. Kind of have something special

planned.

Well, I don't wanna keep you, but....

I love you, B.

I love you too, S.

GOSSIP GIRL: Spotted at the Palace Hotel: S and B

having a heart-to-heart.

Why so thirsty, S?

You may have won over B for now...

...but we still think you're hiding something.

-Hey. -The invisible man returns.

You know, I really had no idea you could move that fast.

Yeah, well, your fashion emergency was solved...

-...so I figured my work was done. -Come on, Dan.

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Serena said hi to you at a ninth grade birthday party and

you never forgot.

How could I? She was the only person who spoke to me.

I'm sure she thought I was someone else. You know,

she's actually nice.

And if she did know you, I think she'd really like you.

I think she might be overwhelmed by the glitz...

...and the glamour of the Humphrey lifestyle.

-I heard she's living at the Palace Hotel. -Well, my point

exactly.

Probably sitting at the bar by herself, sipping martinis, all

alone.

You know, it's actually kind of sad.

Oh, and Dad's at the gallery working late.

He left money for dinner, so I was thinking Indian.

You know what? I think I'm gonna go out.

Okay.

Good, because I already ordered and only got enough

for one.

Move, please.

I love this town.

I'm going to have to tell my parents...

...the hotel they just bought is serving minors.

And if you get a drink, they're also serving pigs.

-I love when you talk dirty. -You love when a girl talks
to you.

Actually, I prefer them when they're not talking.

Mm. I've missed your witty banter.

Well, let's catch up, take our clothes off, stare at each
other.

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How about I just get a bite to eat? I've been drinking on

an empty stomach.

Heard you didn't do that anymore.

Special occasion.

Well, how about a grilled cheese with truffle oil?

You do love truffles?

-Enough to know it's not on the menu. -Good thing I'm

connected.

Only because I'm hungry.

Hi.

Hi.

Is it too much?

I want it to be special.

What's wrong?

Look, I don't know how to say this.

Or if it's even the right thing to do.

But there's something I need to tell you.

Alfonso, you're a stud.

Now, have a good night.

We're closing the kitchen early.

Oh, my God. This is so good.

Well, if you're looking for a way to thank me, I've got a

couple ideas.

It's a sandwich, Chuck.

This is.... Mm-mm.

This is not happening right now.

You worried Nate will find out?

-What? -Last year, the Sheppard wedding.

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Think I don't know why you left town?

NATE: Hurry up. We're not supposed to be in here.

SERENA: If the happy couple didn't wanna put up the

cash for the premium bar...

...they should have made their wedding BYOB.

-No. -Let me see it.

SERENA: No. Make me. -I can do it.

Let me show you. Here, come here.

-Let me see it. Let me see it. -I can do it. Stop.

-Look out, Nate. -That never happens to me.

It's okay. You're still a man in my eyes.

Come here.

-Look at you, you're a mess. -So are you.

But that was it?

You guys kissed.

CHUCK: Best friend and the boyfriend.

That's pretty classy, S.

I think you're more like me than you'd admit.

No. No, that was then.

I'm trying to change.

I liked you better before.

No. Stop it.

Chuck, no. Stop. Stop it.

I knew it. I always knew there was something. Get out.

Chuck! No!

Get off of me.

I'm so sorry. Are you okay?

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GOSSIP GIRL: And just when B and S had built a bridge,

it all had to come crashing down.

But dry your eyes, the Kiss on the Lips party is around
the corner.

And you know who loves parties? Gossip Girl.

-Nice try, son. -Maybe next time.

You seem upbeat this morning. Did you have fun with
Blair last night?

Actually, we got into a big fight.

You want my advice? Apologize, even if it was her fault.

Flowers, jewelry if she's really upset. Works for your

mom.

I don't know. I think it might be for the best.

Wait a minute. You guys broke up?

Yeah. I guess we did.

-Blair is a great girl. -I know.

I'm not sure if she's the girl for me.

You guys have been dating since kindergarten.

So I keep hearing.

-Well, you love her, don't you? -Yes, I do.

I just think it might be good for us to take a break.

Maybe not right now.

Eleanor Waldorf is gearing up to take her company

public.

And I've been courting her to let me handle the deal.

-Then you should get it. -I will get it.

If you could just help me out a little bit.

What? You love her, she loves you. It's just a rough
patch, that's all.

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You don't give up just because things are hard.

Not in business.

Or if your family is depending on you.

How do you know it was Ms. van der Woodsen's?

And if you're not a guest at the hotel, what were you

doing there?

What? Look, when Prince Charming found Cinderella's

slipper...

...they didn't accuse him of having a foot fetish.

And you're Prince Charming?

Well, there's Ms. van der Woodsen now.

-No, no, no. What are you doing? -Do you know this
young man?

She doesn't know me. Nobody knows me.

It's cool. It's fine.

From last night, right? I'm sorry about that.

You remember me?

-She remembers me. -He claims he found your cell

phone.

Oh. You found it.

-Hey, Mom. -Guess what I got for you.

A dress for Kiss on the Lips.

I saw the invitation on the nightstand.

Oh, I'm not going to that.

-What do you mean? Blair's throwing it. -Yeah, see, the

problem is...

...by the time I got the invitation, I actually already had

plans.

Plans with whom?

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My friend.

Yeah, hi. Nice to meet you, Mrs. van der Woodsen.

I'm Dan Humphrey.

What are you and Dan Humphrey doing?

We....

We're going to a concert tonight.

-Lincoln Hawk? -Yeah.

Rolling Stone named them one of the top 10 forgotten

bands of the '90s.

-Whoo! I'm a huge fan. -Mm.

This party would have been perfect for you to announce

your return.

But I guess I'll just keep the dress for myself.

-Thank you. -Yeah, no, it's not a problem, really.

So you'll pick me up at 8?

You'd really go out with some guy you don't know?

Well, you can't be worse than the guys I do know.

Thanks for meeting me.

Look, Blair, I really hurt you. And I know that.

-And I wanna fix it. -Really? And how are you gonna do
that?

I want to put everything in the past.

I'm not gonna see Serena again or even talk to her.

And it'll be like she doesn't exist.

I think that's a good idea. Let's not mention it again.

-You gonna eat that? -That's it?

Because you were pretty upset last night. Should we talk

about this?

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There's nothing to talk about. I overreacted.

If you say it's in the past, it's in the past.

I'm sure you have no feelings for her anymore.

I just feel bad for Serena. She'll really miss you.

-What time does the limo come? -Eight.

Perfect.

Lily. Are you shopping for some more art to match your
furniture?

Why is my daughter going to one of your concerts?

Because we're awesome.

With your son.

-Dan scored a date with Serena? -Mm-hm.

Well, our kids were bound to meet. It's a small island.

It's not some ploy using my daughter to get to me, now

that your wife left you?

-How do you know about Alison? -Like you said, small

island.

I get it. You hear about Alison...

...use your daughter as an excuse to start something.

Yeah. In your dreams.

You are in my dreams. One in particular recurs.

It involves finding you in a Nine Inch Nails bus...

...with your shoes in your earrings and Trent Reznor.

Oh, that happened.

No need to rehash details of decades past.

-So I moved on. -Yeah. From Trent to Lane to Perry.

Till you switched up rock stars for billionaires.

You think you're so cute.

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Season 1

Washed-up band, crappy so-called art gallery.

Well, not all of us have settlements from multiple

divorces to sustain us.

Just stay out of my life, Rufus.

You're going out with Serena and I'm going to Kiss on

the Lips.

Who said this family wasn't cool?

Listen, I don't wanna be late, but good luck, all right?

Same.

See you at the concert, right, Dad?

Okay.

Oh, my God.

My daughter's a woman.

Just tell me I look nice instead of turning this into a

sermon...

...on the passage of time.

You look like your mother.

Thanks.

ELEANOR: Blair, let me see how it looks.

Why are you wearing that one? Didn't you see the dress
I left on the bed?

I like this one.

This one is not as elegant a choice as that one.

Why do you care so much?

Because I love you.

Blair, you will never be more beautiful or thin or happy

than you are right now.

I just want you to make the most of it.

I guess I have time to change.

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And put some product in your hair. The ends are dry.

-Who's the newbie? -Jenny Humphrey. She's a

freshman.

I love freshmen. They're so--

Fresh?

-Anything about her on Gossip Girl? -No.

Until you're done with her.

Hi, I'm Chuck.

I know. Um, I mean, hi, I'm Jenny.

It's nice to meet you.

-You too. -Thank you.

GOSSIP GIRL: Looks like little J might end up with a new

boy and a ticket to the inner circle.

Or will C end up with another victim?

I told you I love parties.

SERENA: So I'm a little overdressed, aren't I?

DAN: Honestly, I don't really have a problem with your

appearance.

Hey, come on, I want you to meet one of the guys in the
band.

-Oh, so you're a groupie? -Well, not quite.

Serena, I'd like you to meet Rufus Humphrey.

-Dad, this is Serena. -Serena van der Woodsen.

Oh, I don't know how I know that. Nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you too.

You guys are a little early. It's gonna be a while.

Yeah, I may have slightly overbudgeted for travel time.

MAN: Hey. -I should go tune that. Excuse me.

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Enjoy the show. Son, talk to you later.

Dad, see you.

So you took me to meet your dad on the first date?

So this is a date?

Maybe I shouldn't have worn my loafers, then.

I'm dressed down a little bit.

Let's go and talk somewhere quiet.

Okay.

JENNY: Well, this is definitely quieter.

But do you actually know where we're going or--?

Here looks pretty good.

So you said you wanted to talk.

What did you wanna talk about?

How into you I am.

Okay, I'm sorry.

If you don't wanna do anything, that's cool.

Let's start over.

-Yeah. -Yeah?

-Do you wanna start over at the party? -Have a glass of

champagne. Please?

-Maybe one. -Okay.

Thanks.

-What? -Sorry, no, nothing, nothing. I just....

My sister was right. You're nice.

You asked me out on a date and you didn't think I was

nice?

No. I just thought you were hot.

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Season 1

And, technically, you asked me out.

Oh, okay. Okay, I see.

So sensitive, tortured-soul boy is actually kind of

superficial, huh?

-Yeah, just a little bit. -Good to know.

DAN: Sorry.

SERENA: A better offer? DAN: No.

My sister. She's at that Kiss on the Lips party.

She's having some problems with this guy, Chuck.

-I'm sorry, I have to go. -I'll go with you.

-No, really, that's okay. -No, listen. If it's Chuck, it's not
okay.

Look, I'm gonna do a lap, okay? Look for her.

Okay, yeah.

WOMAN 1: Is that Serena? WOMAN 2: It's Serena.

WOMAN 1: Oh, my gosh. WOMAN 3: She's really here?

MAN 1: Is that her? Everyone said she wasn't invited.

WOMAN 4: What is she doing here? MAN 2: She's

wasted.

WOMAN 5: Do you think Blair knows? WOMAN 6: What

is she wearing?

She's so brave.

MAN 3: You know Serena. She would never miss a party.

-Serena's here? -Serena's here?

What is she doing here? She wasn't invited.

Blair, come on. Are you really gonna kick her out?

-Did you invite her? -What? No. God, I told you.

Do not talk to her.

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Season 1

I was going for a walk.

JENNY: No. CHUCK: Quiet.

JENNY: Stop.

-Hey, any luck? -No, I haven't seen her anywhere.

Come on, let's try upstairs.

Right.

DAN: There isn't gonna be anybody here. SERENA: Dan.

-What? -That's Chuck's scarf.

Oh, God.

JENNY: Get off. Stop.

Hey! Jenny!

SERENA: Chuck, get off of her!

Are you okay?

You son of a--

What the hell is your problem? It's a party. Things

happen.

-Who are you anyway? -How many times do I have to

tell you?

I'm in your class. My name is Dan Humphrey.

And that is my little sister.

Come on, Dan. Let's go, come on.

Chuck, don't you ever touch her again!

Hey, your life is over, slut.

Don't forget, I know everything.

-You sure you're okay? -Yeah, I will be. Take me home,

okay?

So...

...think I got a shot at a second date?

25
Season 1

Well, I don't think you could top this one.

-I did punch someone. -True.

We'll talk about it in the cab.

She'd better not show her face again.

I'm actually hoping she will.

GOSSIP GIRL: Spotted: Serena making a heroic exit from

B's party.

Too bad for her there's school on Monday.

So until next time, you know you love me...

...Gossip Girl.

End

26
Season 1

02. 와일드 브런치

Main Actor: Blake Lively, Leighton Meester, Penn Badgley, Chace Crawford, Edward Westwick,
Kaylee Defer, Kelly Rutherford, Matthew Settle

Transcribed by: Justin

Provided by: https://blog.naver.com/uzupis

GOSSIP GIRL: And who am I?

That's one secret I'll never tell.

You know you love me. XOXO...

...Gossip Girl.

GOSSIP GIRL: I bet you're wondering what Gossip Girl is

doing up so early.

Truth is, I never went to bed.

Why waste precious time dreaming when waking life is

so much better?

Is there really anything better than a lazy Sunday?

Reading the paper in bed, sipping coffee.

Scrambling an egg or two? Yeah, right.

We Upper East Siders don't do lazy. Breakfast is brunch.

And it comes with champagne, a dress code...

...and a hundred of our closest friends.

And enemies.

Chuck's dad, Bart Bass...

...is hosting the annual brunch for his foundation.

Everyone is invited.

Well, not everyone.

-Oh. Hey, you're up. -And you're checking up on me.

27
Season 1

I'm okay, really, I'm okay.

I was okay when you asked me at the party, and in the

cab.

When we got home. Before and after I brushed my teeth.

Look, I just feel really stupid.

I mean, how could I have thought that Chuck Bass just

wanted to talk to me?

Because you trust people.

Which is normally a good thing.

-Yeah, except when it involves Chuck. -Yeah, pretty

much.

JENNY: So the real question is, how are you?

Me? Why wouldn't I be okay?

You know, at the end of the night, with Serena and the:

Was it really that bad?

This is me.

So good night.

Yeah. Yeah, good night.

Go walk her to the door. Something. Go.

Stop, stop. Sir, stop, stop.

Oh, I think I have brain damage.

If you had brain damage, you wouldn't know you had it.

DAN: No, let's go, please.

-Williamsburg-- -No.

DAN: Hi.

So he waved? I wouldn't have taken him for a waver.

-Maybe he was just trying to be funny. -Maybe he's shy.

Or he hated me.

28
Season 1

No guy in the history of the world has ever hated you.

DAN: She thinks I hate her now.

I've waited my entire life for a date with this girl.

Serena van der Woodsen. And I decide to close the

evening with a wave.

-It was nice. -At the end of a date?

There's no such thing.

You only get one shot with a girl like Serena.

I got mine, and I blew it.

Which means you have nothing to lose.

-Nothing except my last shred of dignity. -Oh, no, I think

that's gone.

You're right.

You know what? I'm just-- I'm gonna go talk to her.

I'm gonna apologize for the wave.

I'm gonna tell her how much I like her. And I'm gonna
ask for a second shot.

-No, I'm gonna get a second shot. -Yeah, you are.

Yeah.

Wait, wait, wait.

I love the plan, but you need a better outfit.

And maybe a shower.

Whatever. It's probably for the best.

The last thing I need in my life is a new guy.

He was just so smart, though. And funny.

It sounds like you like him.

And really nice.

God, Blair was so mean to me last night. I don't even

29
Season 1

know why.

Whatever, I'm sure if we talk about it, we can work it out.

Maybe I should go over there.

BLAIR: Serena better just stay away.

Thank you, Dorota.

-Thanks. -We love sleeping at Blair's.

I don't wanna see Serena at school, and she'd better not

show at brunch.

-You're really mad. -I hope you never get that mad at

us.

-You'd never do what she did. -No, never.

-Of course not. -I wonder if Nate remembered brunch.

It would be so wrong for me to show up without my

boyfriend whom I love.

And who loves me.

-Hello? -Hi, sweetie.

-Did I wake you? -No, I'm up.

Well, get some strong coffee and jump in the shower,

sleepyhead.

Chuck's dad's brunch for his foundation is today at the

Palace.

Right. Of course.

Nathaniel, keep it down.

Some of us are trying to regain our strength.

-Your dad's brunch is today. CHUCK: Alarm's set for 9.

It's 10.

Ladies. Double time.

Oh, unless, Nathaniel?

I'm good.

30
Season 1

Actually could you two bring some coffee when you get
a chance?

And some water. Lots of water.

You want ice with that?

-Looks like you could use some. -That's enough, ladies.

And I'll be sure to tell my father just how committed you

are...

...to the hospitality industry.

That kid popped you pretty good, huh? Never mess with
a guy's sister.

If I knew his name, I'd hunt him down and kill him.

What, because you kill people now? You gonna strangle

him with your scarf?

Don't mock the scarf, Nathaniel. It's my signature.

Just saying, death by scarf. Not that intimidating.

He sucker-punched me. I told you.

Besides, better a broken nose than a broken heart.

What? I didn't even talk to Serena last night.

Who said anything about Serena?

-Do I look okay? -Definitely second-shot material.

All right then, I'm gonna go.

And about what happened, you know, with Chuck?

If you wanna like talk to someone...

...not your brother, just let me know.

-Okay. -Yeah.

All right.

Hey, wait.

Actually, there is someone I wanna talk to.

31
Season 1

DAN: Hey. -Hey, where are you guys going?

I was gonna make waffles.

-Sorry. -Yeah, can't.

-But I wanna hear about your date. -Later.

-And your party. -When we get back.

RUFUS: You guys missed a really great show.

And I make really good waffles.

MAN: Palace Hotel Lobby.

Hi. This is Nate Archibald, calling from the Bass suite.

You don't give out this information...

...but can you tell me what room the van der Woodsens
are in?

Hey, Blair. It's me.

I guess you're still sleeping, but I'm gonna come over.

I think we need to talk.

Okay, uh, see you soon, bye.

GOSSIP GIRL: Looks like the table's all set.

As soon as the guests arrive, we can start dishing.

Here's what's on the menu.

Mom, did you borrow my Michel Perrys?

I can't find anything in here.

Well, it might help if you unpacked.

You're home now. It's your life, start living it.

This is not life, this is a hotel.

Which we're living in because you didn't like the color of

the walls in our real home.

I said I'd go to this brunch, what do you want from me?

32
Season 1

Serena, why are you being like this? You love parties.

-This is just not like you. -Maybe it is like me.

Maybe you don't know what I'm really like. Oh, okay, tell
me.

So did you and Dan have fun at the concert last night?

We never made it.

We actually ended up at the Kiss on The Lips party.

Ah. Well, that must have pleased Blair.

Blair actually, no, not that pleased.

Which is why I'm going to talk to her.

Just be back in time for brunch, okay?

-Mom-- -Look, honey.

I know how hard it is, but the more you hide yourself...

...the more people think you have something to hide.

Coming from someone who's keeping my brother in an

institution.

That's different.

I mean it, don't be late.

Wait.

Hey. How you doing?

-I was in yesterday with Serena? -How could I forget?

Yeah, well, is she in?

Just missed her, actually.

-But you're welcome to wait. -Okay.

Maybe I will. She probably won't be that long, right?

Once she went out and didn't come back for six months.
But feel free to sit.

Over there.

33
Season 1

Over there is where I'll be.

Hi, Nate. It's great to see you.

-Mrs. van der Woodsen, good to see you. -I'm just

heading out.

-Oh, is Serena in? -Oh, you just missed her.

I'll tell her you came by. She'll be happy to hear it.

I don't know about that.

Oh, what? Come on, Serena loves you.

I mean, I think she's always had a little crush on you.

Of course, you and Blair are the perfect couple.

Is Serena gonna be long? I could just wait.

Well, Dexter here can take care of you.

I'm gonna step out for a while. Nate's gonna wait for
Serena.

Great. He can get in line behind that guy.

I had a feeling you'd be back.

-Dan, is it? -Humphrey, yes.

It's nice to see you again, Mrs. van der Woodsen.

I hope you've had a pleasant 21 hours since I last saw

you.

Yes, it has been very pleasant, until now.

Gentlemen.

-Hey. -Hey.

Blair?

Hey.

-Serena. -Hey.

I got two bone-dry caps and Audrey.

I must have totally blanked on the part where I invited

34
Season 1

you over.

I called you.

Blair, it's Sunday morning.

Coffee, croissants, Breakfast at Tiffany's.

-It's our tradition. -I have new traditions now.

Well, they're not traditions if they're new.

Look, I'm trying to make an effort here.

I thought everything was good between us. It was.

Before I found out you had sex with my boyfriend.

-How did you find out? -Nate told me.

At least he felt he owed it to me to tell the truth.

-I don't know what to say. -Don't bother saying

anything.

I wouldn't believe you anyway.

Blair, am I s--?

You know, I always knew you were a whore.

I never took you for a liar too.

-Blair, how can I fix this? -You don't, Serena.

You just stay away. From me...

...my boyfriend, and my friends.

You're done here.

GOSSIP GIRL: Serena's visit was short and apparently

not very sweet.

But you know what is? Revenge.

We hear it's best served cold.

Who's hungry?

Dorota, I told you I didn't wanna see anyone.

35
Season 1

-Hi, Jenny. -Hi.

What do you want?

I realized that I still have your calligraphy pens...

...from the invitations?

You might need them for something.

That is the lamest excuse I've ever heard.

You wanna know what Chuck Bass is saying about you.

No.

Is he? Saying things?

-Is anyone? -Mm. No.

Not yet, anyway.

Chuck likes to brag about his conquests, not his victims.

Come on. You can help me get ready for brunch.

Okay, sure.

-Nice flowers. -They're hydrangeas.

Just coffee. I'm not staying long.

I'd like to get out of here before someone throws me

down and tattoos me.

This is Brooklyn, Lil, not the Warped Tour.

And don't tell me you had all your tattoos removed.

Even that little heart shaped one between your--

Don't try and be cute, okay? Those days are well behind
you.

And here I thought I was getting better looking.

-So, what's the big emergency? -Dan went out with

Serena last night.

And us Humphreys sure are proud of him.

He's sitting in the lobby of the hotel where we're living.

36
Season 1

WOMAN: Can I help you? -Two Americanos.

-One with an extra shot? -Mm-hm.

You don't think I'm gonna tell my kid who he can date.

I mean, is that really the reason you came down here?

-I know what you're implying. -You're falling for me

again.

You're right. It's the low-income tax bracket.

The bad v-neck shirts, awful jokes. I don't know why

your wife left you.

-Well, she's got better taste than you. -Here you are.
Thanks.

Why else have I seen you more in the last two days than
in the last 15 years?

-An unfortunate twist of fate. -But fate nonetheless,

unless you....

-Are you seeing someone? -No, not really.

Uh-huh. Not serious? Or he's married?

-That is your type. -That's enough, Rufus.

What's his name? Would I have read about him in Forbes

or Rolling Stone?

Whoever he is, he can't keep up with you.

I'll take that as a compliment. But I'm serious. I'm worried

about Serena.

I don't need some new boy influencing her.

Distracting her from her needs.

No offense, Lil. But I'm guessing a kid like Dan is exactly

what Serena needs.

So....

What do you need to talk to Serena about?

Nothing, just in the neighborhood.

37
Season 1

-You? -I am nowhere near the neighborhood.

But I'm working on a better excuse.

Are you guys like...?

-I don't know. -Yeah, well, that's Serena.

With her, you'll never know.

CHUCK: Nathaniel.

There you are. What are you doing?

Nothing, I was waiting for you.

Him?

What are you doing here?

-Why, what is this your hotel? -Actually, it is.

Yeah, so unless you have a reason, I'll have to ask you

to wait with the trash.

Trash? Look, man, I live in Brooklyn.

All right? Not the Ozarks.

No offense to the Ozarks.

Don't you think we're taking this class warfare too far?

-I haven't even started. NATE: Okay, let's just go.

You're sticking up for him?

If anyone's got a reason to kick his ass, it's you.

He's not worth it. Not here.

This isn't over.

Hey, anytime, man. That one black eye looks a little

lonely.

NATE: Come on, chill out.

Blair, it's beautiful.

I mean, you look beautiful.

38
Season 1

It's average. The color is last season.

And besides, Stella McCartney has a much better version

at Bergdorf's.

Right, I've been meaning to go by Bergdorf's.

Wow, these dolls are great. Oh, my God, you have

Cabbage Patch.

My brother used to have one. His name was Cedric.

-Your brother's name is Cedric? -No, that was his

Cabbage Patch Kid.

My brother's name's Dan. Actually, you might know him.

-He went out with Serena last night? -That's your

brother?

So does that mean you're friends with Serena now?

I mean, I don't have a problem with her.

But if someone did have a problem with her... ...I

wouldn't have a problem with that either.

You know, if you like that dress...

...you can have it.

What? No, no--

I'm sure you'll find some way to repay me.

Blair, it-- Thank you.

I mean, for the dress and...

...for the other thing.

About Chuck.

If you wanna be part of this world, Jenny, people will

talk.

Eventually.

You need to decide if all this is worth it.

Dan. Hey.

39
Season 1

I was in the neighborhood.

Uh, give or take 70 blocks.

I just wanted to tell you in person...

...that the end of last night may not have been my finest
hour.

There was a wave.

-I saw that. -Yeah.

Yeah, and since then, I've just have been wondering....

Are you hungry?

Yes, actually.

I've had the worst morning.

Well, do you wanna talk?

And eat. Not necessarily in that order.

I would love to, both. Food first.

-Because I'm starving. -Great, just in time for brunch.

-Mom. -Ms. van der Woodsen.

Dan. Still here?

I really don't think it's a good idea for me to go to that

brunch.

-You promised. -Yeah, but that was before....

Before I knew Dan was hungry too. I can't let the boy
starve.

-It would be inhumane. -He's not invited.

-Yeah, that's why I'm going with him. -Because I can't

go with her.

And we had plans to go to brunch together today.

We had those plans.

Serena. You're home.

40
Season 1

Living under my roof, my rules.

What is it gonna take to get you dressed and through

that door?

You know what? Maybe this was a bad idea.

You've gotta be kidding.

Yeah, this was definitely a bad idea.

This should be fun.

GOSSIP GIRL: Looks like Chuck and Blair showed up

with quite an appetite.

For destruction, that is.

Hey, Dad. How's the new song going?

-I think I need more coffee. -Whatever works.

-Where did you get the dress? -Oh, it was a thank-you

gift.

-From Blair, for doing the party invitations. -It looks like
a very expensive gift.

She has a closet the size of this apartment full of them.

Her mom designed it.

And her mom's very talented. But the dress you made
for yourself is much nicer.

-Which is why you don't wear dresses. -One reason.

Hey, you think the Farmer's Market's still open?

-Yeah, why? You wanna go? -Yeah.

-I thought you were too old for your dad? -You used to
be cool.

And the '90s are having a comeback.

You have no idea how much that hurts.

Well, I can't say much for his child-rearing skills...

...but Bart Bass knows brunch.

I, uh.... I need to use the ladies' room.

41
Season 1

You think you'll be okay by yourself for a while?

Yeah, come on, me and some beluga caviar? Can't get

enough of the stuff.

-Okay. -Right.

Hey, how's it going?

No, really? Yeah, okay.

Yeah, just go ahead. Do your thing.

Charles.

-Would you excuse me? WOMAN: Of course.

Father.

The invitation said black tie, not black eye.

Are you okay?

I mean, if you're in some kind of trouble....

Only of my own making.

Why do you think I do all this, huh?

This party is for you.

Okay? So you can meet people.

You know, become a part of something, make some kind

of change.

Really?

I thought it was another excuse for an open bar...

...and re-hiring of the nearly-nude statues.

Do me a favor, will you?

Lose the Scotch. It's barely noon.

NATE: I really need to talk to you.

I need to talk to you, which means you can listen.

You told Blair. What were you thinking?

42
Season 1

-I wanna explain-- WOMAN: Excuse me.

Sorry.

-We can't talk here. -What, where Blair might see us?

-Meet me in Chuck's suite. -I'm not sneaking with you.

Please. Just to talk.

-Ten minutes. -I'll meet you up there.

You look beautiful as always. Where's your lovely mother

today?

Paris. Must be some drama at the atelier.

Nothing too dramatic, I hope. Her line is doing well.

I was just telling my firm what a great investment she'd

make.

She's really going places.

Hopefully places far, far away.

Just kidding.

Hey, let me get you a refill. I'll be right back.

I'll go with you. Excuse us.

Blair seems happy.

Looks like you're taking care of business as discussed.

Dad, not everything in life is a business deal.

Come talk to me in 30 years. I wanna introduce you to

Timothy Good.

His firm has some got some really interesting summer

internships.

I can't believe Serena came to this brunch.

I told her to stay away.

You worried about Nate?

Just a shot in the dark.

43
Season 1

I think you know what you need to do to get his attention.

And what's that?

The key to my suite, Nate's heart, and your future

happiness.

I'm honored to be playing even a small role in your

deflowering.

-You're disgusting. -Yes, I am.

So why be shy? Just grab Nate and finish this.

And report back with details.

Nice to meet you. Dad.

Hey, can I get you a drink?

-What are you doing right now? -I was just gonna--

How about me?

-Why? Do you have a better offer? -No, of course not.

Yeah?

-Now? -Now.

Now.

Where are we going?

I got us the best room in the whole place.

-Wait, this is Chuck's suite. -Nate?

-Serena? -Blair.

GOSSIP GIRL: Spotted: N and B hot and heavy in the

halls of the Palace Hotel...

...only to find S already waiting.

Sparks were flying for sure. But will it be a three-way?

Or D-day?

What is she doing here?

-I was meeting Nate. -Just to talk, I swear.

44
Season 1

-You said you'd never speak to her. -You said that?

-Why would you? -You can't be trusted.

-It's not her fault. -Don't defend her.

-I asked her to come. -Oh, so you do wanna talk to her?

Yes. To explain why I'm not talking to her.

Maybe I'll leave you two to finish that conversation.

Oh, no, no. I'll go.

-Let you guys get back to your quickie. -It wasn't a

quickie.

Sex is actually kind of a big deal to some of us.

Oh, yeah. I can see that.

Chuck's bed? Very romantic.

Classy too.

Oh, like you?

I'll bet your new friend Dan would love to hear all about
how classy you are.

Dan?

-What, you really think she would tell him? -It's Blair.

SERENA: I can't believe you told her.

-You just expected me to keep it a secret? -Yes, Nate.

There's nothing wrong with keeping a secret if the truth

is gonna hurt someone.

-That's a hell of a way. -I'm sorry.

I didn't realize all of a sudden you're the most honest

guy on the planet.

Seems to me you're the one that doesn't wanna be seen

in public.

LILY: No, I do wanna be seen.

I just don't wanna see you with anyone else.

45
Season 1

Tell your harem of shop girls and models that you're

seeing someone.

BART: I am. But those conversations take a little time.

Well, they've got nothing but time, Bart. They're 25.

Excuse me.

Dan, wait.

Look, I really don't appreciate your lurking in the

shadows...

...eavesdropping on my conversation.

What? No, no, I wasn't.

-I was looking for Serena. -I don't see her.

-Do you? -No, which is why I was looking.

I don't know what you're doing here, or what you think

you heard.

-Nothing, I heard nothing. -But Serena doesn't know.

And neither do I, okay?

So if you'll excuse me? I'm gonna go back inside.

Not tell anyone a thing and mind my own business.

Dan?

-Hi, I'm Blair Waldorf, Serena's friend. -Oh, hey.

Yeah, do you happen to know where she is?

-As a matter of fact, I do. SERENA: Blair.

Serena, there you are. Where were you?

She was waiting in a hotel room. For my boyfriend.

SERENA: To talk. -About why we weren't talking.

Doesn't sound any smarter the second time.

Why weren't you talking?

Is this why you were waiting for Serena this morning?

46
Season 1

You were what? CHUCK: Here I thought you were waiting

for me.

Oh, exactly what this situation needs. Chuck.

-What's going on here? -We were getting to that.

-Blair, please, don't do this. -Sorry.

-Did you wanna tell him? -I'll tell him.

-You know? BLAIR: You know?

-I know everything. -And apparently I know nothing.

Look, Dan, it was a long time ago, and I regret it.

CHUCK: Look, Serena, stop trying to pretend you're a

good girl.

So you slept with your best friend's boyfriend.

I kind of admire you for it.

Is that true?

Well, then she ran away. And lied about it.

I just thought you should know.

Before you fall head over heels for your perfect girl and
her perfect world.

Get left alone with no one but your Cabbage Patch Kid.

Cabbage Patch?

-Did you talk to my sister? -Yes, little Jenny.

I do believe she and I have some unfinished business.

-You stay away from her. -Poor Daniel.

So little time, so many sluts to defend.

It's fine, it's fine. Everyone can stop looking.

He's a jerk.

But it's my fault and I'm leaving.

-I'll go with you. -Actually, I'd prefer if you didn't.

47
Season 1

Hope you're happy.

Not even close.

Looks like it's just you and me.

Apparently, my room is available.

GOSSIP GIRL: Some might call this a fustercluck.

But on the Upper East Side, we call it Sunday afternoon.

-Dan. Dan, wait, I'm so sorry. -There's no-- There's no

need to be.

-I shouldn't have come. I made a mistake. -No.

-Look, I'm sorry about Blair and Chuck-- -It's not about
Blair or Chuck.

It is, but it's not just them.

No, I know, trust me, I know. This world, it's crazy.

Yeah, it is.

-And you're a part of it. -What, and you didn't know

that?

I don't know. I thought you were different.

Well, I'm sorry I'm not who you thought I was.

But what's happened is in the past, you know...

...and all I can do is try to change.

But if you can't accept that...

...then, you know, you're not who I thought you were.

Well, I guess we both made mistakes.

-Hi. -Hey.

Jen said you went looking for Serena. Did you find her?

Yeah. Yeah, I found her and then I lost her.

-That's-- -It's fine. It's fine. It's all for the best.

Serena and her friends and her family. Her whole world.

48
Season 1

Turns out it wasn't for me.

Wait, Dan, what happened?

Did you tell Blair Waldorf about Cedric?

I....

It may have come up.

You can't trust these people, Jen. Don't tell them

anything.

Those are nice flowers.

They're hydrangeas.

Look, Blair, either you try to forgive me and move on...

...or we end it.

GOSSIP GIRL: Well, Serena's mystery man is a mystery

no longer.

His name is-- Oh, who cares?

Now that he and S are over, so are his 15 minutes.

But his sister Jenny was spotted with a new dress.

Gifted from Blair herself.

Everyone knows an Eleanor original is the uniform of B's

private army.

But will J be a loyal soldier, or will she side with S's rebel
forces?

And as for S herself?

We hear that she left today's brunch...

...with no friends, no boy, and nowhere left to run.

It looks like the ultimate insider has become a total

outsider.

It's your move, Serena.

And you know who'll be watching.

Gossip Girl.

49
Season 1

03. 포이즌 아이비

Main Actor: Blake Lively, Leighton Meester, Penn Badgley, Chace Crawford, Edward Westwick,
Kaylee Defer, Kelly Rutherford, Matthew Settle

Transcribed by: Justin

Provided by: https://blog.naver.com/uzupis

WOMAN: Where has she been?

GOSSIP GIRL: And who am I?

That's one secret I'll never tell.

You know you love me. XOXO...

...Gossip Girl.

GOSSIP GIRL: There's plenty of upside to being the

spawn of the fabulously wealthy.

But the downside?

Super successful parents expect nothing less from their

offspring.

And when it comes to college, that means the Ivies.

It's more than just getting into college.

It's setting a course for the rest of your life.

And for those few who aren't legacies, the pressures are
no less.

When parents have sacrificed for their children's

futures...

...what kid would wanna let them down?

TEDROW: Thank you, ladies.

Good morning, students.

I ask all of you to show a little sympathy for our junior

class.

They are almost through with Ivy Week.

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Season 1

As is our long-standing tradition...

...the Constance Billard girls will be in charge of Friday

night's mixer...

...and the St. Jude's boys will provide ushers for the
visiting representatives.

TEDROW: For those of you who dream of attending an

Ivy League school...

...this mixer is the most important event of your life.

But no pressure.

-It's not that bad. -Looks like I shaved with a wood

chipper.

I was going with more of a chainsaw.

-Not helping. -Not trying to.

Hey, look on the bright side, you're not a hemophiliac.

-You'd be in the emergency room. -And that's helping?

-Mm. Not really. -Dartmouth's gonna love you.

I gotta believe being able to shave is a prerequisite for

attending.

No one is better qualified, no one is smarter, more well-

rounded.

Or wounded. It's not like I have a trust fund to fall back

on, Dad.

-You know, all I have is what's up here. -Uh--

That is the most important thing.

College is about academic excellence, not your stock

portfolio.

You're gonna do great in your interview. You take after

your dad.

Spotlight doesn't faze us.

Oh, you better hope there's not a spotlight involved. Ha.

I'm your sister. It's what I do.

51
Season 1

Not when it's about Dartmouth.

TEDROW: Remember, students.... CHUCK: Nathaniel.

A little wake and bake?

-We have our interviews today. -My point exactly. I have

my one hitter.

TEDROW: Underclassmen should consider this week a

dress rehearsal.

You're not only representing yourselves this week...

...but generations from our school and your families.

Try not to cut me off next time.

You almost knocked me over the side of the bench.

I didn't cut you off.

I didn't mean to.

You win fair and square, nothing can make me prouder.

Until you get in to the old alma mater.

We talked about this. About keeping my options open,

looking out west?

Let's get serious. Someone with your grades wants to

get into Dartmouth...

...you need to be working for it.

-Dad, I-- -Ushering the rep is a good step.

Every time I bring up USC, you act like it's a joke.

-There's a plan here. -Maybe I wanna make my own--

Your mother and I didn't work hard so you just make

things up as you go along.

Dartmouth, law school, Blair.

Soon you're gonna have everything.

Listen, I'm late for work. Nail that interview today.

Go Green.

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Season 1

TEDROW: As part of Ivy Week's festivities at tomorrow

night's mixer...

...Blair Waldorf will announce the charity...

...her community outreach committee will honor this

year.

Have you seen Serena?

-I wonder where she is. -You know what I wonder?

How I'm supposed to hear anything about Yale with this

talk about Serena.

TEDROW: Dartmouth, Penn, Princeton, Cornell.

Do you remember when Dad gave me my first Yale

sweatshirt?

I don't think any piece of clothing has ever fit me more

perfectly.

Not to mention how adorable I found that bulldog.

Remember when I asked you if I could get a bulldog?

Good call, by the way, saying no.

And now the big day is finally here. Soon, Nate and I will
be away at college.

Him coming down to Yale, me going up to Dartmouth.

Dad flying in for the Princeton game.

I hope it doesn't make you feel old, watching me grow

up.

DOROTA: Eat up, Miss Blair.

Your mom would want you to have a good breakfast.

TEDROW: Now, Headmaster Prescott.... -So Serena's

really not here?

That's what I said.

When you weren't supposed to be talking.

Serena, come on. Hurry up, you're gonna be late.

53
Season 1

I am. And I know.

You shouldn't have stayed at your brother's again. Why

sleep there?

It's not like he can see you. His eyes are closed.

Do you have one maternal bone in your entire body?

Serena, you need your rest, okay? It's Ivy Week.

I know. If I can get out of this hotel room...

...it's my mission in life to impress that Brown rep.

I am so thrilled to hear you say that's still your plan.

I know it's something we've talked about...

...but, honestly, since you've been back...

...I've wondered if your mind was even on college.

Look, Mom, I've had my mind on a lot of things...

...but since recent events, going away to college sounds

pretty good.

-How, um, did you leave things with Dan? -I don't

wanna talk about it.

-What's going on with you and Blair? -Mom, please.

Look, all I wanna do is just finish high school in peace...

...and go away to a state with lots of people...

...who don't know who I am and just start over, okay?

Take a cab. Don't walk.

Oh, God. God, please, don't tell me it's over.

What? You were there. I would say it's pretty over.

I meant the assembly.

Oh, right. No, yeah. No, it just ended. Now.

-Damn it. -Anyway, good luck.

Yeah. You too.

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Season 1

Oh, too bad you missed the assembly. Not that it

matters.

Brown doesn't offer degrees in slut.

GOSSIP GIRL: Spotted: S not-so-fashionably late and

dressed down by B.

Game on, ladies.

GIRL: Look out!

Look, I made a mistake with Nate. But then you

sabotaged me with Dan.

We don't have to be friends, but--

-What's up, Waldorf? -Sorry, slipped.

I'm fine.

-I wanna believe that was an accident. -Then you must

be delusional.

GIRL 1: Yeah, yeah. GIRL 2: Come on, move it. Move it.

Thank you.

I'm running out of colors here, Blair.

And I'm running out of patience. Enough, okay?

It's enough when I say it's enough.

COACH: Girls, break it up.

-Get off of me! -Is that enough yet?

So we've actually come to physical blows, huh?

Truce?

-Ow! My leg. COACH: Serena, you're out of here.

I hope it's broken.

GOSSIP GIRL: Hey, Upper East Siders.

We hear that World War III just broke out, and it's wearing
knee socks.

Choose your side or run and hide.

55
Season 1

We have a feeling this one's to the death.

PRESCOTT: And why should you be the Dartmouth

usher?

Well, I've given this a lot of thought.

I think I can answer your question in three parts.

I'd like to start with third part first, if it's cool.

Unless, uh, that would be confusing...

...in which case I can start at the beginning. Ha.

The Dartmouth Principles of Community...

...highlight integrity, responsibility, and consideration.

Uh, well, from St. Jude's, I've learned integrity.

From being an older brother, I have learned

responsibility.

And from my parents...

...who have sacrificed everything to send me to this

school...

...I've learned consideration.

It really comes down to one thing:

Dartmouth is my dream.

And I've never asked Dartmouth, but I think it's been

dreaming of me.

That was a joke. Or an attempt at one.

Next question?

-You are the ideal Dartmouth candidate. NATE: Thank

you, sir.

And it would be an honor to attend Dartmouth.

I've grown up hearing all about it from my father.

I'm just not sure it's my first choice.

And if there's only one usher position available...

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Season 1

...I'm sure there's someone who wants it more than me.

Why should I be chosen to be an usher?

I'm Chuck Bass.

PRESCOTT: Excuse me.

Hey.

-Hey. -You get the one you wanted?

No. No, actually, you did.

Which makes total sense because I'm second in our

class...

...and you're somewhere around-- What, I don't know,

uh, last?

-No hard feelings, huh? -Why should there be?

I mean, how many libraries has your dad had to endow

to get you this spot?

-You've earned it. -Look.

You don't know anything about my family.

I'm sorry. You're right.

I'm sure J.L. Hall will be very impressed...

...with your passion for the Dartmouth experience.

-Who the hell is J.L. Hall? -He's the Ivy rep.

You might want to pick up his book if you want anything

to talk about.

The Petting Zoo.

That's the name of his book.

-Whoa, angry guy, huh? -Yeah.

-Short fuse. I'm trying to work on that. -Let me know

how that goes for you.

-Yeah. I'll keep you posted. -It's a tough week.

Not for me, apparently.

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Season 1

-Oh, you got an usher position? -No, I didn't.

In an ironic, though not totally unexpected twist...

...Nate got the one I wanted.

I'm sorry.

Yeah, well, I guess that's life when you're not a legacy.

Just because you're not an usher doesn't mean you're

not gonna get in.

Yeah? Where'd your parents go to school?

Harvard and Brown.

That's all I'm saying.

-I can't believe Serena did this. -Yeah, it's such a cheap

shot.

-Finally. CHUCK: Hello to you too.

I heard about the field hockey throwdown.

All those mouth guards and short skirts. I hope

somebody filmed it.

-Ugh. You're heinous. -Which is probably why you

called.

You know me well.

Women like to pretend they're complicated. I know

better.

My leg's numb now. How about a heating pad?

-Sure. -Okay.

Serena came home for a reason.

-One can only guess. -I'm done guessing. I want

answers.

No one likes to be on the ground floor of a scandal like

Chuck Bass.

I am a bitch when I wanna be.

Opportunity to cause some trouble. Uncover a secret.

58
Season 1

Take yes for an answer.

Let's turn back to school. I left something important

behind.

-Oh, Danny boy, how was your day? -He's about to

hype dinner.

Because no matter how good it was, it's about to get a

lot better.

I've outdone myself with the Bolognese.

Sorry about the melodramatic entrance.

You didn't get it?

No, I didn't get it.

And that I do not get.

They-- They gave it to Nate Archibald.

Last year, I believe he had an original thought.

It died of loneliness.

-I'm sorry. -You're sorry?

Yeah, I know how much you and Mom sacrificed.

The reason you sent us to a school like this...

...is so we can go to a college of our choice.

-What if that's all for nothing? -It's not, okay?

It's not.

So you don't get to be the usher of some whatever party.

Dad, could I just, um, stew alone for a while?

Yeah.

We're Humphreys, Dad. Not exactly royalty uptown.

Are you okay with that?

No. But I'm used to it.

This is way too good.

59
Season 1

Mom? How's Paris?

You're not going to believe where I've found our little

princess.

Really?

CHUCK: Admit it. Even for me, this was good.

If you weren't such a perv, I'm sure the CIA would hire
you in a second.

Defending my country. There's a future I never imagined.

With good reason. What is she doing there?

What's anyone doing there? It's a facility for the

disturbed or addicted.

You must have your own wing.

You don't get nearly enough credit for your wit.

So the question is, what do you do now?

I was thinking total social destruction.

And here I thought you were getting soft.

So this is your bed, huh?

Leaving. Now.

You can repay me another time.

I've been in these sessions every day for the last week...

...but nothing is going to change unless she stops hiding

him here...

...and lets him have his life back.

This is not called hiding, Serena. It's called recovery.

Telling everyone he's staying with Aunt Carol in Miami?

-He's not ready. -He's not, or you're not?

Okay. Let's take a deep breath. It's good to see honest

conversation.

-What does she know about honesty? -Serena.

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Season 1

But I really think a decision like this includes Eric as well.

Oh, you mean I have a say in this? Wow, thanks.

Eric, of course. We're here for you.

Look, if you're ready to leave, you tell us, okay?

No matter what Mom says.

I would really like to get out of here.

But maybe I'm not ready yet.

Hey, what about for a few hours?

You can be my date to the Ivy Week party tonight.

Serena, that party is an important event for you.

Well, he'll be around people he knows. It will be fun,

comfortable.

-Uh, actually, that sounds great. MILLER: Well, there we

go.

Compromise. That wasn't so hard, was it?

You know what? I have to go.

Help them set up for tonight at the school.

It's my job as both parent committee chair and

responsible mother.

It will be great, okay?

BOY 1: Hey, you coming down? BOY 2: Yeah, yeah.

-Hi, how are you? TEACHER: Good.

Rufus Humphrey. My kid, Dan, goes to St. Jude's...

...and he should've been selected as Dartmouth's usher.

Maybe there was a mix-up, a glitch in the system.

I'd like to believe that. I like to believe the best.

I'm sorry, Mr. Humphrey. The usher positions have been

filled.

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Season 1

There's nothing we can do.

Is there anything else? Any other positions?

Uh, you'll have to discuss this with our committee

chairwoman.

Sure, I'd love to. Where can I find her?

I'm not sure. She must be running late and--

Oh, there she is now.

Why am I not surprised?

Lucky for you, she seems to be in a good mood.

Until she sees me.

-Rufus. -Told you.

Excuse me.

-You got a minute, Lil? -Not for you.

You're in.

-What? -The Ivy Week party tonight.

Your name will be on the program and everything.

-You got me the Dartmouth spot? -I knew you could do

it, Dad.

No, you didn't. And, no, I didn't.

How you feel about the refreshment committee?

-There is no refreshment committee. -Not until now.

-Oh, God. -What?

Everybody gets thirsty. It's a position of power.

How did you secure me this prominent and embarrassing

position?

-By offering my own services. -Serving snacks?

I'm the head of the entertainment committee.

Another committee that didn't exist until you left the

62
Season 1

house today.

Way to go, Dad. Wait, so who's the entertainment?

Since it was such short notice, the only person I could

get was myself.

Kind of a staid affair for early '90s post-punk math rock,

don't you think?

I'm bringing a couple of the guys. It will be Rufus

unplugged.

-Need a roadie? -Thanks, sweetie.

Should I call Mom, and we can make this a full-fledged

Humphrey affair?

Look. I did the best I could.

At least you get to officially be a part of this thing.

You can talk to that author you love. Ask him anything
you want.

Like his preference for soft drinks?

If you get at all anxious, sweetie, if you feel lightheaded

or panicky--

I'm fine, Mom. All I have to do is be normal.

-Or at least act normal. -Works for Mom.

Do you see the Yale rep?

I thought you wanted to go to Brown and Blair wanted to

go to Yale.

Yeah. I know.

My father would never forgive me if I didn't introduce

myself.

You two used to do crew together.

Crew? Oh, hi. I'm Serena van der Woodsen.

I didn't know you were interested in crew.

I'm not. I was just saying that there's a family

connection--

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Season 1

I didn't know you were interested in athletics at all.

Especially ones where you get your hair wet.

She's really more of an indoors type of girl.

Oh, my goodness. Your glass is almost empty, let's get

you a drink.

-Uh, no, I'll take him. -Oh, don't worry about it.

So tell me about Yale.

Can you explain how Serena's commandeering the Yale

rep...

...while you're supposed to be his usher?

I switched.

I'm trying to get into Princeton.

Oh, don't get your La Perla's in a bunch. Look who has

arrived. Dr. Ostroff.

Blair, Dr. Donald Ostroff.

GOSSIP GIRL: Interesting choice of guests, B.

Such a pleasure. I've heard such wonderful things....

GOSSIP GIRL: Coincidence? I think not.

-I liked your book. -Oh, thanks.

What did you think of the epilogue?

Some people really love it...

...but the New York Times called it a cheap cop-out.

Warner Bros. is making the movie. I think they're gonna

change the end.

Well, I can see how the ending might not seem all that
commercial.

Would you like something to drink?

-Lily. Hello. -Oh, Bart. Hello, how are you?

Hey, Eric. How was, uh, Miami?

64
Season 1

It was good, thanks.

-You know, go Marlins. -Ha-ha-ha.

Would you excuse me, please?

The neuroscience project I'm working on...

...involves the cellular signaling pathway of neuronal

nitric oxide synthase.

It's initiated when glutamate binds to NMDR.

-Hi. You're Eric, right? -Hey, you're Jenny. Dan's sister,

right?

-Yeah, we, um, met at-- -Bendel's.

-Yeah, I remember. -Oh, cool.

Eric, good to see you. You enjoy Miami?

Uh, yeah. Save the manatees.

-Manatees? -It's a long story.

I've got time.

It's a little dark.

I can handle it.

-You wanna go to Yale, then? -No, Brown.

It's just this thing with Blair.

Ah, yeah. I get it.

Since you don't have to worry about getting into

college...

...why not make the entire evening about screwing over

Blair?

No, thanks.

SERENA: Hey.

Wait, you're seriously not gonna talk to me?

Like, literally not speak?

65
Season 1

Hey.

Oh, much better.

Thanks, guys.

So? Um....

What's he like?

Like a Dartmouth English Lit professor I have nothing in

common with.

Guess I could tell him how everything I have I got

because I'm an Archibald.

You should mention Dr. Seuss.

Theodor Geisel is his real name. He went to Dartmouth.

Uh....

Hall got the idea for The Petting Zoo from The Lorax.

-The what? -Um....

Never mind.

Just mention how his prose style is influenced by early

Faulkner.

You'll be all right.

Uh, or not.

I was actually gonna get some fresh air. How about you
take these over to him?

All right.

Yeah, I guess I could leave my post unmanned for a

minute or two.

-Where do you think you're going? -Home.

I don't think so. Get back out there and finish what you
started.

You mean what you started? I don't wanna go to

Dartmouth.

There, I said it. Now back off.

So we moved into the hotel and, uh, it was just the two

66
Season 1

of us.

And I was really lonely.

So that's when you...?

So I ended up at the Ostroff Center.

My mom says they have the best counselors...

...but what they really get paid for is to keep their mouths
shut.

Look, I won't say anything.

I promise.

So do you wanna go back in?

Yeah, answer more questions about Florida?

Well, I have a grandma who lives in Fort Myers.

I can help think of some material.

May I please have everyone's attention?

Welcome again to the Constance Billard- St. Jude's Ivy

Week mixer.

I'm Blair Waldorf, chair of the Community Outreach

Committee.

Every year, our schools choose to support one local

institution...

...that we feel benefits our community.

This year, our schools have chosen to honor the Ostroff

Center.

This semester, our choice is a very personal one...

...because the center has helped one of our own.

What is going on here?

It's because of their excellent program which aids young

addicts and alcoholics...

...that a student here with us today is clean and sober.

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Season 1

At least for now.

Can I please have Serena van der Woodsen join me on-

stage?

GOSSIP GIRL: Spotted at the Ivy Week mixer: S and B's

last stand.

And only one gets out alive. Better take cover.

-Please tell me this isn't happening. -It's not.

-No. -Sweetie.

You're not going up there. You're gonna stay right here,

okay?

Whatever you're doing...

...think about who's standing in this room right now.

Don't try to deny it. Chuck saw you.

Hi. I'm Serena van der Woodsen.

I just wanna thank my friend, Blair Waldorf...

...for recognizing the Ostroff Center and all of the good

things that they do.

Thanks, Blair.

At the center, one of the main things that we learn is

forgiveness.

-So she's in rehab? -No, it's not her.

It's her brother who's there.

-What? -You can't tell anyone, okay?

I won't. But why is she doing this?

I've learned about how in order to move forward with our

future...

...we must forgive those who have wronged us in the

past.

And we must ourselves ask for forgiveness... ...from

those whom we've wronged.

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Season 1

Without this forgiveness, innocent people get hurt.

All right, thank you, Serena. Thank you. Thank you.

GOSSIP GIRL: Honesty may be the best policy in some

zip codes.

But not in this one. And not this week.

Because, "I was a teenage drug addict" is not exactly a

winning college essay.

And now can I please have Dr. Ostroff join me on-stage?

Why is Blair outing you for a drug problem that you don't
have?

-You don't, do you? -Mom.

It's not like we have some free, open relationship.

And that's my fault?

Look, what's happened to Eric has put a huge strain on

our family.

But we are still a family.

Why do you think I did what I just did?

Will you excuse me? I'm gonna go end this with Blair.
Now.

Blair, what the hell was that?

-Will you excuse us, please? -Sure.

So we good now? We square?

No. Because nothing I do will ever be as bad as what

you did to me.

Look, I'm asking you, please. I'll stop if you will.

You're just saying that because today you lost...

...and you're gonna keep losing.

Now, if you'll excuse me, unlike you, I have a future to

get back to.

Serena.

69
Season 1

-Serena. -What?

What, you wanna congratulate me on destroying my

future?

No, no. I just wanted to ask if you're okay.

Because what you did in there for your brother, that was-
-

That was very cool.

-Wait, how did you know--? -Hey, it's okay.

Really, no one will ever hear it from me.

But if you ever need anybody to talk to or not talk to...

...I'd be happy to do either.

I'll keep that in mind.

And, um, I know I've said some things about you and
your world.

And I'm sorry.

Obviously I don't know anything about your life.

Thank you. But I've really got to get out of here.

Yeah, sure. Sure.

But maybe, you know...

...I can take you up on that getting-together-and-not-

talking thing...

...sometime?

Will you call me?

Yeah.

-Okay, let's go. Let's get out of here. -There's someone

I need to talk to first.

-Please, Mom. I can do this. -Okay.

Blair, can I talk to you? It will just take a moment.

Sure. Sure.

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Season 1

Serena's not a patient at the Ostroff Center.

You've always been sweet. I understand you trying to

protect your--

I am.

-I've never even seen you take a drink. -I'm not an

alcoholic.

I did this.

And today Serena protected me.

Eric....

-I didn't-- -See that coming? Yeah.

It must be a shock for someone who thinks she knows

everything.

What was that all about?

GOSSIP GIRL: Another bomb lands in Blair's lap. Will she

use it as ammunition?

Or will she finally surrender and put down her arms?

Nothing.

So you really impressed the guy, huh?

Must be the way you poured those sodas.

Yeah, about that. Uh....

I know I may have been a little light on the gratitude.

-Yeah. A touch. -But I appreciate it. All of it.

Even if I sometimes don't show it.

We're real men, son. We don't like to share our feelings.

But I know what you're capable of.

And nothing, my last name, my bank account...

...is gonna keep you from getting what you deserve.

Not if I can help it.

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Season 1

I see that Dartmouth has an electro-acoustic music

program.

-What do you think of me applying? -What?

And Jenny's smart. Get her early admission.

Maybe we'll all go.

So not remotely funny.

Nate.

Hello?

Oh, yeah. I'll be right there.

Where the hell could you possibly have to be right now?

I'm late for a run with my dad.

-Who's Jessica? -Hm-hm.

Ah, Jersey girls.

Let's just say they're the Princeton Tigers for a reason.

All right, I'll see you.

CAPTAIN: You feeling loose? Feeling good?

-Good. -All right, because I'm gonna get you.

Hey, good to see you, son. It turns out Jed's a runner

too.

I would've never mentioned it if I knew he was gonna get

me out this early.

CAPTAIN: I'm glad you're better.

I was just telling Jed about your little bout of food

poisoning last night.

What do you say, kiddo?

-You wanna show him how it's done? -Let's go.

Nate is the captain of his lacrosse team...

...as well as being an all-star cross-country runner.

72
Season 1

-Hi. Um.... -Hey.

-Is it okay that I'm here? -Yeah. Hi.

Uh, will your mom be mad?

That you're here? That would require her stopping by.

Saturdays are spent at Bliss.

After last night, I think she could use some extra time on
the massage table.

Sorry. Well, here.

Somebody has an admirer.

They're for my sister. From the Brown rep. Um....

Apparently his cousin did some time here in his youth.

Well, that's good, right? I mean, at least her entire future

isn't blown.

I don't think that's making her feel a whole lot better right
now.

Whenever something's bothering you, I can always find

you here.

You here for another catfight?

-What's that? -A letter.

I wrote it to you when you were away at boarding school.

I never sent it.

"Dear Serena.

My world is falling apart...

...and you're the only one who would understand.

My father left my mother for a 31-year-old model.

A male model.

I feel like screaming because I don't have anyone to talk

to.

You're gone.

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Season 1

My dad's gone.

Nate's acting weird.

Where are you?

Why don't you call?

Why did you leave without saying goodbye?

You're supposed to be my best friend.

I miss you so much.

Love, Blair."

Why didn't you send it?

-I would've-- -You would've what?

You knew, Serena.

And you didn't even call.

I didn't know what to say to you.

Or even how to be your friend after what I did.

I'm so sorry.

Eric told me what happened.

I guess your family's been going through a hard time too.

GOSSIP GIRL: Spotted in Central Park: Two white flags

waving.

Could an Upper East Side Peace Accord be far off?

So, what will it be, truce or consequences?

We all know one nation can't have two queens.

What happens next? Only time will tell.

XOXO, Gossip Girl.

End

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04. 새로운 백화점 모델

Main Actor: Blake Lively, Leighton Meester, Penn Badgley, Chace Crawford, Edward Westwick,
Kaylee Defer, Kelly Rutherford, Matthew Settle

Transcribed by: Justin

Provided by: https://blog.naver.com/uzupis

GOSSIP GIRL: And who am I?

That's one secret I'll never tell.

You know you love me. XOXO...

...Gossip Girl.

[MOUTHING] Hi.

-Sorry, but you're not on the list. -Of course I am.

This is my dream.

[IN WOMAN'S VOICE] Not anymore.

GOSSIP GIRL: Hey, Upper East Siders... ...there's

nothing Gossip Girl likes more than a surprise.

And we hear Blair Waldorf's got a two for one special.

Her mom, Eleanor, who just returned from Paris...

...and Serena van der Woodson, brunch buddies.

-Hey, you're up. -Don't we have plans?

Darling, it is impolite to interrupt.

I was just telling Serena that Bendel's is interested in

carrying my line.

Really?

Oh, that's fantastic. Why didn't you say something?

I came back from Paris early to put together my look

book.

And if they like what they see...

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...it could be the beginning of an entire lifestyle

collection.

Because people should be like you, mother.

Before you tuck into that, you might find the low-fat
yogurt more appealing.

I lost two pounds when you were away.

And you look marvelous.

Wow, these are beautiful, Ms. Waldorf.

Well, they will be if they're not all squished from traveling.

Darling, please. Eh.

Serena, you have to come back later when everything is

unpacked.

I would love to hear your thoughts. You have great

personal style.

Oh, thank you. I don't think we'll be able to.

-Blair and I have plans today. -We do?

GOSSIP GIRL: Serena and Blair might have plans for the
day...

...but Nate and Chuck are fully booked for the weekend.

If they survive it.

-Found it. Piaget. NATE: Can't you just call it a watch?

If it costs more then 10 grand, it earns a proper name.

NATE: How about this? CHUCK: Definitely that.

Babe Ruth's called shot.

The most famous homer he ever hit.

Better safe than sorry.

Here we go.

You've lived through Ivy Week and hopefully gained

entry...

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...to the college of your choice.

Now, let's ruin those chances.

Let me remind you of the rules.

As of this moment, there is no outside world I do not

show to you.

You eat what I provide, practice what I preach.

And till I say so, the only girls you talk to...

...are the ones I paid for.

Let the Lost Weekend commence.

One, two, three. Drink.

-Who brought the Sasquatch? -Isn't that Carter Baizen?

Haven't seen him since he was a senior. We were in the

8th grade.

He looks intense.

Are you high?

He looks like Matthew McConaughey between movies.

The guy's a loser.

Look, anyone who trades their trust fund for a fanny

pack...

...flies in the face of all that is holy to Chuck Bass.

Nate Archibald, is that you?

Baizin, my man. I heard you went rogue. Ha, ha, ha.

-I lived to tell about it. NATE: Hey.

GOSSIP GIRL: Seems like someone's itinerary didn't

leave room for interlopers.

Doesn't Chuck know a party isn't a party until someone

crashes?

Oh, God, I forgot what it was like to be with you.

No, they were looking at both of us.

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Don't insult me. It's been like this all morning.

Starting with your visit with my mother. She didn't even

call me she was coming.

Well, she was busy. She was rushing to get home and
everything.

-She wanted to see you. -She didn't even wake me up.

Well, you know how Eleanor feels about beauty rest.

She likes you more than me.

She does not. You're her daughter, she doesn't like

anyone more than you.

She just, I don't know, doesn't know how to show it

sometimes.

Okay, I'm going inside.

Wait for me. I'll be right back.

Humphrey. Dan.

-Hey. -Hey.

Oh, my God, this is what I love about this city.

You're always bumping into people.

-What you doing here? -On my way back from Mom's.

Drop Jenny off at Hudson, picked up couple Cubans for

me and my dad.

Sandwiches, not cigars.

Hey, remember you said we could get together

sometime...

...and not talk?

-I was wondering, is it sometime yet? BLAIR: That was

disgusting.

-The DOH should shut them down. -The bathroom?

No, the people. It's called Nolita, not No Showers.

What are you doing here?

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Do I smell pork? And cheese?

Well, when you're done with your charity work, why don't
you come find me?

I'll be at Tory Burch looking at ponchos.

Isn't that the girl who told the entire school and, oh,
several colleges...

...that you had a drug problem?

Yeah.

But, you know, Blair can be a little Blair.

-Yeah, yeah. -We're actually trying to work things out.

Today is our first day hanging out together, alone.

So I should probably get back.

-Yeah, yeah, sure. BLAIR: Yeah.

But, um, call me sometime...

...so we can get together and do that thing you didn't

ask me to do.

The last time I saw your sister...

...she said your family had locked you out and you'd
fallen off the earth.

I didn't. I just fell off the face of theirs.

Away from money, you see it doesn't buy you freedom.

Pays for your prison.

They say I disappeared, but all I did was break out.

-Where did you go? CARTER: Where?

I aided the cleanup post-Katrina, spent a year rebuilding

Machu Picchu...

...which, let me tell you, changed my life.

I bought an HD cam and started filming for a

documentary.

You're the guy who gave us our first joint, snuck us into

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our first club...

...and you're gonna tell me the life of a YouTube

filmmaker...

...is better than this?

You invented the Lost Weekend.

Who cares about a party when you can travel the world?

In the real world, the thing that matters is who you are,
not what you own.

As much as I love the speech about not needing material

things...

...from a guy who has that much product in his hair...

...this party is about excess, not exposition.

Stop talking.

Start partying.

Now, here is something that doesn't need material.

As a matter of fact, it's about to come off.

Who's with me?

-I think I'm just gonna hang here a bit. -Fine.

I hate to break up a matched set, anyway.

How about we continue this over some cards?

None of this crap these kids are playing. Texas Hold'em

is dead.

I'll show you some real action.

You know what?

I'm in this weekly game on this corner in Queens.

Goes all night, it's the real deal. High stakes, big money.

People with the kind of stories that will put mine to

shame.

You should-- You should come.

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Season 1

-Yeah? -Yeah.

ELEANOR: This one, Mister Q at the Chloé show.

Because she was throwing up a pair. Ugh.

She was in Vera's Vogue spread. I don't use Vera's

models.

None are right.

ADVISOR: You're looking at the high-fashion book...

...when you should be looking for a new face.

Someone who looks good in your clothes. Someone in

this book.

Like I told you.

I hate the American Apparel effect.

But they're closer to what you need. They're now, they're

hip.

If this person is supposed to represent Waldorf

designs...

...you have to find me someone worthy of the clothes.

-Like someone like me. -Mm.

Someone like....

My daughter.

Well, why not her?

You want your line to represent the Waldorf lifestyle.

Who better to represent you than one of your own family?

She was my first dress form.

-She'd love to. -I would?

Eleanor?

Yes. It's perfect.

Eleanor Waldorf, meet the new face of Waldorf for

Bendel's.

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GOSSIP GIRL: Is that a smile we see on B's lips?

The spotlight's on her for once, and S actually helped

her get it.

I guess miracles can happen.

It's gonna be so hot. The clothes are gorgeous.

-They're all right. -Shut up. They're amazing.

I'm just doing my mom a favor.

The hair-makeup test is tonight.

-This is my best pose. -You can't see what you look

like.

You're just a hand model, and that's it. The right way is
this.

Girls, no, this is how you do it. No, no, no.

You gotta curve your spine forward.

Oh, no, you guys are doing it all wrong. Look, you're
missing the key.

Look, look, look. You gotta put the hand on the hip and
pop.

That's how you gotta do it.

-Pop. -Pop.

-Pop. -No.

Hello? Who is this?

Who dare interrupt the van der Woodsen as she teaches?

BLAIR: I said, who? SERENA: Give me my phone.

Dan Humphrey.

-Who is it? -Sorry, the number's no longer in service.

Who is it?

I'm doing you a favor.

I can hear you. Can I just please talk to Serena?

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-You can, Cabbage Patch. -Cone on, let me have it.

BLAIR: God. -Hello?

Dan, hey, I'm so, so sorry about that.

And I am so, so ready to hang up.

Blair was playing. You have my full attention, I promise.

Good, because I was calling to ask you to not talk with

me at a movie tonight.

Tonight? Where? What time?

The Sunshine, 7:00.

I'd love to. Uh, I'll see you there.

See you there.

It's complicated, isn't it?

I can't stop staring at it. It's a difficult work.

I mean that in the best way. It's enigmatic.

Reminds me of an early Bacon or a Schnabel.

The artist is in Hudson.

I've represented her for some time.

-Rufus. -Bex Simon.

I've heard a lot about your gallery.

I wasn't expecting a piece like this from a former rock

star.

-I prefer one-hit wonder. -Ha, ha.

What turned you gallerist?

RUFUS: I've always had artistic pursuits. BEX: We have

something in common.

I always pursue artists.

I've been in Brooklyn all day looking for work for a client.

I'm a buyer.

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I didn't think I'd find a piece like this and I don't think it'll
be here long.

I'd like to put it on hold.

-May I? -Yeah, of course.

-What time do you close? -I'll stay open.

Good.

Thank you.

-What is Carter still doing here? -I invited him.

Or he invited himself. That is his style.

Begging us to break free of our prisons while stuffing his

face with free food...

...and draining our booze.

He's a deadbeat and a hypocrite.

And a good ball player, if I remember right.

Sure you just don't wanna lose to him?

If your daddy bought a basketball team instead of a

hotel, you'd have skill.

This is the Lost Weekend for juniors, not senior citizens.

Jump into a volcano.

-Should settle it on court. -Settle it now.

-Hey, chill out. -No.

-This is my game, I pick the players. -I get it.

I'll go.

Hey, hey, man. Is that card game tonight?

-Yeah. -Text me the address later.

I will.

-You didn't have to do that. CHUCK: Nobody wanted

him.

He's an older brother bringing everyone down.

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Let's just play some ball.

PHOTOGRAPHER: Okay, Blair, relax. Just chin down and

hold it there, and....

Okay, you ready?

Okay. One more.

This time, let's exhale, jump around, loosen up...

...really loosen up on this one, let's relax into it.

Give me the biggest pose you've got. That's it.

Come on, let's think big, big, big.

One, two, three.

Okay, take a break. Thank you very much.

Who chose this girl?

-Eleanor, why? -She's so prim, stiff.

Like a bookcase. It's unnatural.

Yeah, but she looks stunning in the clothes.

To my eye, like a goddess. To this eye, blah, like a

statue.

This is retail, not an editorial.

She needs to let go, have fun, loosen up.

How's the client going to like the dress if the model

doesn't even like herself?

Hey, first of all, you look amazing.

-I know. -Look, can I give you a little tip?

-How did I know this was coming? SERENA: No.

Look, all you need to do is maybe you could loosen up

a little, you know?

Shake it up, maybe you could be goofy like when we

were 10...

...and would dance to "Genie in a Bottle" in your mom's

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clothes.

Help me. Help me.

Um, okay.

Act like a tiger, okay? Come on: Rahh!

-Rah. -No, look, you gotta roar: Rahhhhhh!

-Rahhh! SERENA: Yeah, give me more tiger.

Give me more tiger. Give me that jungle.

You're savage. Now, let's do a prettier one, okay?

You're Venus in the half shell, right?

SERENA: Let's do crazy, like Britney with the umbrella.

-Okay? Britney with the umbrella. Go. -Ahhhh!

-At the car. At the car. -Ahhhh!

SERENA: Oh, oh-- BLAIR: Ahhhh!

BLAIR: Yeah.

-Posh Spice in America. Ready, go. -That's Cyborg

Spice to you.

You gotta pop more and strike. Remember hand on the

hip?

Strike it and pop. Come on, give me more.

You're a sexy beast. Oh, it looks so good. You're doing

so good. You got it.

-Look how good you are. -What you doing?

Oh, shoot. I gotta go meet Dan.

No, you're staying. I need you.

I can't let my mother down.

WOMAN: Thank you.

-Hey, you almost here? -Hey.

I'm really, really sorry...

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...but I'm kind of stuck at this photo shoot with Blair.

SERENA: It's a long story, but I don't think I'm gonna

make it.

-Oh, a photo shoot, huh? -It sounds really superficial, I

know.

But it's important to her and, you know, she's important

to me.

SERENA: But I'll make it up to you. -It's no big deal.

Don't worry about it.

You're the best. Knew you'd understand.

SERENA: I'll call you later. -Yeah, yeah.

MAN: How many? -Uh....

None.

You're still here.

See? I told you I'd wait.

Mm. A man who keeps his word. I like it.

RUFUS: You get a chance to talk to your client?

BEX: I'm back, aren't I?

-Write me up an invoice. -Really?

-That's great. -Now you're awfully excited.

This isn't your first time, is it?

Selling a painting.

Few firsts are left for me.

But the artist will be very pleased. She's been doing other
things for a while.

-It's kind of a big deal for her. -For my client too.

This is a very special piece.

You wouldn't want to....

I don't know, celebrate with a drink?

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Actually, the previously mentioned excited artist is my

wife.

I thought you said the artist lived in Hudson. Long

commute.

She lives there, I don't.

If the trains ever stop running.

-Hi, woo! -Yeah!

Phase three, pub crawl. Five boroughs.

Fifty pubs, 500 chances to get laid.

And don't dip your shillelagh in the wrong pot of gold.

You can think about your boyfriend inside.

I'm not coming.

Seriously, Carter Baizen sucks.

Don't know what spell he's put you under. He's not your
friend.

He can't be trusted.

Why? He doesn't believe what you believe in?

It's exactly what he said.

The money, the drugs, the privileges.

They keep us numb so we don't notice it's better in the

real world.

The real world? Everyone out there wants to be us.

We are what you aspire to, not run away from.

You really don't get me, do you?

That dream of yours, you know, what is it really?

Because I hear you talk about how you don't wanna go

to Dartmouth...

...and how you don't wanna follow your father.

But what exactly do you want?

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All I know is it's not this.

You better discover what it is...

...before you throw everything away trying to find it.

Now, where are you going?

How was the movie?

Uh, missable. Literally.

I don't know about Serena, Dad. I can't tell if she's worth

it.

What do you mean?

Well, she's best friends with this girl, Blair Waldorf...

...who is everything I hate about the Upper East Side...

...distilled into one 95-pound, dough-eyed, bon mot-

tossing...

-...label-whoring package of girlie evil. -Ha, ha, ha.

-No one's that bad. DAN: She is.

I'd barely be exaggerating if I told you Medusa wants her

withering glare back.

Well, if there's anything I've learned, it's that usually

there's something...

...beneath the surface with people like that to make them

act that way.

Like what? The OJ in her mimosa was from concentrate,

not fresh-squeezed?

And what does this say about Serena that this is her best
friend?

I dated a girl like Serena once.

Actually, a lot like Serena.

And girls like that are challenging, it's true.

And they're complicated and enigmatic.

And usually worth it.

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And the only way you'll know for sure is to jump in with
both feet.

What happened with you?

I swam for a while.

Till I drowned.

Oh. Well, thanks, that's a great story, Dad.

Now, get some sleep, and I will see you in the morning.

We'll go to the photo shoot together.

You haven't done this since I was little.

You haven't been in bed by 10 since you were little.

You looked beautiful tonight, you know?

Really?

-Hello? -How was the movie?

SERENA: Did I miss something amazing?

Well, even without the movie.

Don't be cocky.

I'm calling you with a make-up plan.

-Oh, are you now? SERENA: I am.

How would you like to see what really happens at a

fashion shoot?

I'm sorry, this is Dan Humphrey. Sure you're not trying to

reach my sister?

Look, I know it's a girlie offer, but chew on this. I'll be

there.

Can I bet on that?

Because law of averages says I'd lose my shirt.

Come on. It's Blair's shoot.

SERENA: So I have to be there for moral support. Blair?

Well, I'm definitely not going now.

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Look, she's really not as bad as you think.

She's gonna be so busy with the shoot that you won't

even have to see her...

...and since it's so boring on the sidelines, you'll have

my full attention.

Okay, what if I buy you anything from craft service?

-Thought craft service was free. -I'll see you at 8.

I'm texting you the address. I'm hanging up.

Both feet, Humphrey.

ELEANOR: What's the emergency?

Apart from my not getting my sleep before the big day,

Laurel.

And why couldn't we simply have discussed it over the

phone?

Because if we didn't meet in person, I couldn't show you

these.

PHOTOGRAPHER: I don't think this girl is what you're

trying to say.

Unapproachable, controlled, perfect.

She is not unapproachable. She is poised, regal.

PHOTOGRAPHER: Look, I know she's your

daughter... ...and I don't want to make problems...

...but your girl is rigid like a twig.

You know, she's afraid to let you in.

So your works of art and she fail to achieve....

What's the word?

Symbiosis.

-What can be done at this stage? -Your daughter is

beautiful.

But this girl, this girl has it.

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She is warm like sunshine, she has fun.

She'll make the clients think if they buy these clothes,

they'll have fun too.

But this is your line, Eleanor.

It's completely your choice.

GOSSIP GIRL: The rules for a model the day of a photo

shoot...

...are similar to those of a patient pre-surgery.

No food or drink 12 hours prior...

...wear comfortable clothing, and make sure your affairs

are in order.

You never know what could go wrong in a flash.

SERENA: Hey, B, you must either be sleeping or already

on your way...

...but I can't wait to see you.

We're gonna have so much fun.

Oh, thank God you're awake.

Am I late?

Oh, my God. Oh, my God, did I oversleep?

Darling, I have some bad news.

Terry, that fool of a photographer, thinks we need to go

in a different direction.

With the theme?

-With the model. -Oh.

Darling, I hired these people for their expertise.

And ultimately, they feel that we would be doing the

brand a disservice.

I cannot apologize enough. I know that you were really

looking forward to this.

No, I wasn't. I'm glad I don't have to go.

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I hate shoots. They're so boring.

You should have Alessandra Ambrosio, not an amateur.

We'll have dinner after, yes?

Steak frites and crepes at Café Desartistes.

Just like old times. I will see you later.

Hey, S. All right.

I hope you're not already there, because as it turns out...

...my modeling career is over faster than Jessica

Simpson's acting one.

Now that I think about it, maybe we should crash the

shoot anyway.

See who they replace me with.

Make fun of the skinny bitch?

LILLIAN: How could you?

Actually, I like this here.

This is no joke, Humphrey.

What are you doing?

The question is what are you doing selling it to me?

You.

-You're Bex's client. LILLIAN: And you didn't know?

I'm surprised you hired someone with taste.

I am equally as shocked.

When she said she found something in Brooklyn...

...your gallery never entered my mind.

You'd have to recognize art to remember the place.

What I recognize is that your wife would not want this

hanging in my house.

Alison's a professional.

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She doesn't do background checks on prospective

buyers. Neither do I.

-It's been almost 20 years. -And you still don't know

women.

-And you still know it all. -Your wife despises me.

I wouldn't say that.

Well, she did.

She may have been wearing a slip dress and Doc

Martens at the time...

...but she meant it.

She's not like you. She doesn't hold on to that stuff.

Why don't you call and ask her?

Or are you still giving her her space?

Because, trust me, putting this up in my house...

...even having this conversation with you, will only drive

her further away.

Well, what do you want me to do, then?

Take it back. You can call Bex and set up a refund.

So, what did you think of it?

I thought....

It was extraordinary.

Hey, no phones.

Oh, right, sorry, man.

How much you up?

Five thousand.

-It's insane, amigo. -Should quit while I'm ahead.

What? We just started.

I've had a good run. Plus, it's better to leave while you're
up.

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I'm not gonna let you do that, bro.

Table's about to get smaller, people are gonna start

showing their real stuff.

Up until now it's been cards, but....

From now on, it's an adventure.

Just a couple more hands.

All right, gents, ante up.

Okay.

Let's hit it.

PHOTOGRAPHER: Yeah. Give me the Marilyn Monroe.

Great. Remember.

Come on, it's your birthday. Come on, give me the

happiest girl....

You've got to be kidding me.

PHOTOGRAPHER: Fantastic. One, two, three.

Oh, there she is.

Blair, come on. Quick.

What took you so long?

Hey. Blair.

Blair. Blair, wait. Where are you going?

Blair, wait. Why are you so mad?

Why am I mad?

You mean why aren't I furious?

-I thought it would be different this time. -What would

be different?

You couldn't deal with the spotlight shining on me for

once, could you?

What are you talking about? I was told we were doing

this together.

-Did you not get my message? -What about this

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Season 1

morning, then?

When you glanced at the call sheet, see my name?

When I wasn't in hair and makeup?

Dressing room had only your name, you think they just
forgot?

I was told you were running late and they asked me to

do test shots first.

Blair, they told me you wanted me here.

And you believed them?

Look, Blair, I encouraged you to do this.

Why would I try to steal something that I pushed you to

do?

Because you take everything from me. Nate, my mom--

-Blair-- -You can't even help it.

It's who you are.

I just thought maybe this time it would be different.

I should have known I'd be wrong.

Great.

GOSSIP GIRL: Spotted, lonely boy's rude awakening.

Upper East Side queens aren't born at the top.

They climb their way up in heels.

No matter who they have to tread on to do it.

ELEANOR: But we need her back.

ADVISOR: I know.... -Oh, there you are.

-Let me tell you how perfect you look-- -I quit.

Now, wait a minute. Why?

-I think you know why. -Because of Blair?

I know that she will support my decision once I explain it

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to her.

You love the spotlight, you always have.

It's part of your charm. There is nothing wrong with that.

Who are you? What are you doing here?

I have no idea, actually. I....

MAN: Get back on.

WOMAN: Yeah.

Hey, I kind of overheard you guys in the stairwell--

Dan, look, I really can't go here right now.

Oh, okay.

Forget I said anything, then. In fact, you know what?

I'm mute, I'll just stand here and blink real quiet, unless
you want me to--

Hand me my jeans?

Yes, please.

It's just, uh....

I thought you wanted to be on the sidelines here.

I thought you wanted to be here for your friend, Blair,

you know?

We were gonna get craft service and I'd have your full
attention?

Say it.

I don't think I have to.

So my best friend doesn't believe me.

And neither does the guy I like.

Look, Dan, Blair's mom basically tricked me into coming

here...

...because she didn't want Blair.

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How do you tell your best friend something like that?

Oh, I didn't-- I guess I didn't--

You know what, Dan? Just go, okay?

I need to clean up, and I just need to get out of here.

Serena send you here to talk to me?

No, believe it or not, I actually came here myself.

Normally I wouldn't be this close to you without a tetanus

shot.

My, uh-- My mom kind of left us a couple of months

ago.

Only my....

My dad and my sister don't really see that.

Because she told us she had to go away for the

summer...

...to follow her dream of being an artist.

But it's not summer anymore, and she's still up there...

...and it's all she seems to care about right now.

Every time I go to see her, I tell myself: "This time, I'm

gonna tell her what I think."

This time I'm gonna look her in the eye and say:

"Either come home or leave for good."

And so there I was.

The other day, I was sitting across the table from her
looking her in the eye.

And I didn't say anything.

Why not?

Uh.... I don't know.

But I wish I had.

Because even if it didn't change anything, she'd know

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how I felt.

DEALER: Bullet, gentlemen.

First bet.

PLAYER: Five thousand. DEALER: Five to call.

-I don't have the money, call this bet. -Some luck.

Hey, you guys okay with a marker?

I don't think it's a good idea. If you're ever gonna take a

risk, start now.

What's the point of anything less?

CARTER: It's fine.

-You sure he's good for it? -Of course he is.

He's an Archibald.

-Make it 10,000. DEALER: Five to call.

PLAYER: Call.

Show your cards.

Trip bullets. Trip aces take it.

-That's rough. -You told me.

It's the luck of the draw, my friend. He had three aces.

Look, I don't--

-It might take a while to get the money. -Wait, wait, wait.

What? A little while?

Come on, man.

Snap your fingers.

Wait a minute. Are you in with these guys?

-Did you play me? PLAYER: Hey, hey.

NATE: You're playing me, huh? I guess that's a yes.

CARTER: Give them the money.

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Money means nothing to you. No one has to get hurt.

-I'm trying to help you out. CHUCK: Yeah, you're a real

friend.

-Who let you in here, Bass? -He set me up.

-Your boy lost fair and square. CHUCK: Did you?

If you don't give them the money, I'm gonna tell everyone
where you live.

-What do you think about that? -Look.

You've got my watch and my ball.

You keep them, take care of these guys.

I don't call the cops and we walk out of here.

It's cool. I got it.

I'm gonna have to transfer some money and pray the

captain doesn't notice.

You don't have to pay me.

I mean, it was worth every cent to see the last of that

guy.

No, I want to. I mean it.

Thanks.

-That can't be right. CHUCK: What's up?

-I'm zeroed out. -Have the wrong account?

No, there must be something wrong.

I accessed this account last month and it said there was

almost 200,000.

NATE: Hey, Tom, thanks for getting back to me so

quickly.

TOM: The message said it was important.

Um, I was checking my accounts... ...I came across

what I assumed to be an error...

...in that my trust seems to have a zero balance.

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TOM: Oh, I thought you knew. That account was drained

weeks ago.

Drained? But by who?

TOM: Your father.

He said he discussed it with you.

PHOTOGRAPHER: People, we have to solve this.

-What are we gonna do? -I know. Just set this up.

ADVISOR: Blair, there's a mistake. How would you like

your job back?

Did you choose Serena over me?

You could've picked a stranger. You didn't have to

choose my best friend.

BLAIR: Did you think I wouldn't find out? -I was going to

tell you tonight.

At dinner.

There was no right decision. There wasn't any time.

I know you can understand all this.

It was mishandled, the whole thing, from top to bottom.

-You actually want me to agree with you. -Bendel's

would legitimize this company.

It will take everything to the next level. You know how

hard I've worked for that.

You've always been my biggest supporter, my biggest

fan.

I'm your daughter.

And as my daughter, I knew that you would forgive me,

in time.

But if my company had lost this deal because of you...

...I'd never forgive myself.

I hope you never do.

GOSSIP GIRL: You didn't hear it from us, but in every

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girl's life...

...there comes a moment when she realizes...

...that her mother just might be more messed up than

she is.

You're still here?

I thought I couldn't leave without bringing you something

from craft service. Um....

And telling you that I'm sorry I judged you.

Well, I'm sorry I gave you a reason to.

Hey, how about you ask me out again?

-How about you actually show up? -Okay.

-No drama, no disruptions, I promise. -You promise?

-That means it'll never happen now. -Okay, I take it

back, I un-promise.

Friday, 8:00.

I think we can agree to those terms.

But you can't wear those shoes. Mm.

Or that hair.

SERENA: Blair....

-Okay. See you then. BLAIR: Oh....

All right.

-So you were right. -I know.

When I got that call, I should've known you had nothing

to do with it.

And I should never have pushed you to do this whole

thing in the first place.

Actually, I'm glad you pushed me.

It ended up being a very important day for me.

I just thought it was gonna be more fun.

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I know. Me too.

Hey, you know what?

Who says it still can't be?

Come on. Now, come on.

GOSSIP GIRL: This just in. S and B committing a crime

of fashion.

Who doesn't love a five-finger discount?

Especially if one of those fingers is the middle one?

Where are my clothes?

GOSSIP GIRL: Everyone knows you can't choose your

family...

...but you can choose your friends.

And in a world ruled by bloodlines and bank accounts, it

pays to have a pal.

Do it again. One two, three.

GOSSIP GIRL: As much as a BFF can make you go

WTF...

...there's no denying we'd all be a little less rich without

them.

And Serena and Blair?

They do besties better than anyone.

Thank you. Thank you so much.

GOSSIP GIRL: No, that's not a tear in my eye. It's just

allergies.

Without you, I'm nothing.

Gossip Girl.

End

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05. 데어데블

Main Actor: Blake Lively, Leighton Meester, Penn Badgley, Chace Crawford, Edward Westwick,
Kaylee Defer, Kelly Rutherford, Matthew Settle

Transcribed by: Justin

Provided by: https://blog.naver.com/uzupis

WOMAN: Where has she been?

GOSSIP GIRL: And who am I?

That's one secret I'll never tell.

You know you love me. XOXO...

...Gossip Girl.

With Blair's boyfriend, Nate... ...helping to close up the

family yacht for the season...

...Blair is free to focus on the most important event of

the fall:

Her annual sleepover.

A tradition since the year 2000, each one more decadent

than the last.

No expense or reputation is spared.

With everything from trundle beds to truffles in place...

...all that's missing is sleepover star and Waldorf BFF,

Serena van der Woodsen.

Dad, I'm headed to the bank.

You want me to deposit the check from Mom's sale while

I'm there?

Did you knock over a parking meter?

No, this is the entire contents from my Teenage Mutant

Ninja Turtle piggy bank.

How long can a man have a piggy bank and still call
himself a man?

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I thought it was time to break Donatello open.

-So tonight's the big night, huh? -It is, and I have it all
planned.

Six pounds of plan, actually.

It's been a while since I took someone on a date...

...but movie-ticket prices haven't risen that much, have

they?

Dad, this is Serena van der Woodsen. You can't just take
her to a movie.

I want this to be perfect.

Check, want me to deposit it?

You still haven't told her yet, have you?

Dad, that's Mom's first sale.

That painting sold days ago, it's kind of a huge deal.

I know, which is why I was thinking of surprising her

myself...

...heading upstate to Hudson, bringing her the check in

person.

What? Aren't I supposed to deliver good news in person?

I think that's bad news.

Good news might just be fine with a phone call.

So you're saying I shouldn't go see her?

I'm saying, I don't think Mom is a huge fan of surprises.

You remember her 30th birthday with the clown and his
llama?

Yeah, that didn't--

-Didn't go over well. -Tanked.

I'll call her first, just to be safe.

Need some change for that?

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Hey, just the little sister I was looking for.

I need answers, and I need them now.

Your brother is being mysterious about our date tonight.

He's a very mysterious guy, apparently.

He won't even tell me where we're going. Can you just

give me a hint?

Are we going to some secret club to see the best

unsigned band in Brooklyn?

Or a guerrilla art exhibit in Dumbo?

Isn't the New York Film Festival still going on?

You don't leave room for surprise, do you?

Well, I don't know how to dress for surprise. Not

everything goes with it.

Well, I'd say jeans and a T-shirt's a safe bet.

The Humphrey men do casual Friday every day.

-Oh, it's my brother. -Oh, I say hi.

Eric, hey.

-Jenny says hi. -Well, hi back.

Did she spill about tonight?

No, not a drop. You all packed?

-Yeah, baggage is ready to go. -Speaking of which, is

Mom still there?

Yeah. She's talking to the doctor now.

I can't believe she's letting me come home for a

weekend.

I don't think I even remember what a weekend is.

What time's your date? Maybe we'll cross paths.

Seven. Can't wait to see you.

Me too. Bye.

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Okay, love you, Eric. Bye.

What was that I heard? Eric's coming home?

-It's perfect timing. -How so?

It gives your mother and brother time to bond alone...

...while you get drunk on Schnapps and moon the NYU

dorms from the limo.

What are you talking about?

S, it's only the most important night of the fall.

Oh, the sleepover.

I prefer "soiree." "Sleepover" is so sophomore year.

Look, you know I can't go to that, I have that plan.

Serena, when there's a Waldorf soiree... ...there's

nothing else on the social calendar.

Blair, the plan is Dan.

Remember, the guy you realize is actually a human

being...

...and worthy of your time and attention?

-No offense. -None taken.

Look, I'm really sorry, but this date is unbreakable.

Maybe we can swing by later or--

I am not a stop along the way, I'm a destination.

And if you refuse to attend, I'm gonna find a

replacement.

Girls, the waiting list.

Okay, well, I should get going.

-Bye. -Good luck tonight.

Thank you.

Little Jenny Humphrey. Why didn't I think of you before?

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You have no plans. You're coming to the soiree.

Me? Really?

-Her? Really? -Her? Really?

The thing is, if you come...

...you'll have to be up to a little more than just sleeping.

I'm up for anything.

-My place, 7:00 sharp. -Okay. Bye.

A girl's first sleepover, something she'll never forget.

Let's make sure of it.

Taking bets on how long she lasts.

Fifty bucks says an hour and not one minute more.

I don't understand.

He said I was ready. We talked about it in our session

this morning.

What he said is that you could come home, not that you
should.

-I thought-- -I don't wanna argue about this.

-I need time to think. -Please.

I told the doctor I'd take it under advisement.

You can't just walk out of here, anyway.

There's papers to be signed, release forms, insurance-

-

I can't believe you. You wanna keep me here forever.

If you still think I'm keeping you here...

...that just proves how not ready you are to come home.

Look, we'll talk about this tomorrow, oka--?

Yeah. Yeah, you bet we will.

-Hey. -Hey.

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Hey, am I early or...?

No, no. I'm just running late.

Come in.

Excuse me while I go slip into something less

comfortable.

Sure, sure.

Talk to me while I change?

-I will. -Okay.

Say, this is a nice place that you and 800 other people
have got here.

Yeah, the identical surroundings do make you crazy after

a little while.

Sometimes I feel like I'm in a secret government

experiment.

Most government experiments don't have plasma TVs or

maid services.

Just something I've noticed.

Dan. Does Serena know you're here?

Yeah, of co-- Yeah, she let me in.

Or at least I hope that was her. She's about yay tall, very
blond?

It makes jokes. Cute.

-Big shopping day? -I had a lot on my mind.

So where are you taking my daughter tonight?

I don't know. Thought maybe we'd do a walking tour of

New York Underground.

Visit my friends, the Mole People.

They're great, except they only ever eat leftovers.

I'm sorry, I don't know why I said that.

I have this nervous tic where I don't stop speaking, like,

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ever.

When I was little, my mom used to say there was never

a word I met I didn't like.

You know what else I like?

Your daughter. I really like your daughter.

I--

You're not wearing that with that, are you?

Mom....

Here, wait.

-Take this. -Oh, thank you.

Hey, where's Eric? I thought he was gonna be home by

now.

Oh, he was too tired to come home tonight.

Mom.

Later.

Come on, let's go.

Home by 1:00. Bonus points for 12:45.

Oh, my God, a Vespa.

I can't believe it. I love Vespas.

My gosh, you don't understand.

I spent one of my favorite summers riding all around Italy

on one of these.

How did you know?

Mom won't let me learn to drive, she said that's what

drivers are for.

But really, Dan, this is amazing.

Really.

-Come on, where are the helmets? MAN: Mr. Humphrey.

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-Is he--? Is he ours? -Yeah.

Okay. Great.

GOSSIP GIRL: Spotted on the steps of the Palace...

...Cinderella stepping onto a pumpkin instead of her

carriage.

Lucky for Lonely Boy, there's more than one fable filling
our inbox.

That's not bad.

I will take that for you, yes?

Jenny. Oh, I'm so glad you could make it.

Here's an inside tip, Little J.

The faster you rise, the harder you fall.

Hope that Hello Kitty sleeping bag doubles as a

parachute.

Let the games begin.

-How's the braised quail? -Very good, sir.

Okay, and the "lapin"?

Lapin. It's delightful.

Okay. What is that again?

-Rabbit, sir. -Oh, well, I won't be having that.

How about chicken? You can't go wrong with chicken.

-Yes, sir. -Thank you.

-Miss? -I'll have the lobster bisque...

...and Muscovy duck, please. Thank you.

I can't believe the waiter forgot me, I was just here...

...the other day.

I come here for the crowd. You wanna play mistress or

second wife?

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Because it's harder than it looks, believe me. So is

her...face.

Will you excuse me?

I-- I'm gonna go to the restroom to freshen up a little.

Of course, of course. I think the bathrooms are--

Don't worry, I'll find them.

Oh, excuse me, sir. How much is that duck she just
ordered?

-Seventy-eight dollars, sir. -Okay, right, thank you.

Can you cancel my main dish and I'll just have the
appetizer as the main?

Of course, sir.

Thank you, thank you, merci.

Too Beyoncé.

Too Mary-Kate.

Too Hannah Montana.

Wow, even I'm impressed.

I don't know, I mean, I don't really feel right.

Well, as my mother always says, "Fashion knows not of

comfort."

All that matters is the face you show the world.

And your face looks like it's going to bat mitzvah.

But before we continue the renovation....

-Martini. -Oh, no, thanks. I don't like vodka.

Well, that's nice, because this is gin, as it should be.

It's a party, Jenny.

Either swallow that or swipe your Metrocard back home.

It's up to you.

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All right, who's ready for a game of truth or dare?

Oh, I love truth or dare.

Once, I had to eat an entire bag of marshmallows.

That's nice, little Humphrey, but that's not how we play.

Well, how do you play?

I think I'll go truth.

MAN: Hello? Hello?

What am I, a teenager?

MAN: Hello?

Yeah, hey, I must have the wrong number.

Did you just call a second ago?

Sorry about that, but I'm pretty sure this is the right
number.

Who are you trying to reach?

Is Alison Humphrey there?

Hold on a second, she just got out of the shower.

Al? It's for you.

Who's calling?

Rufus Humphrey.

Who is this?

Alexander Bancroft.

Just her-- Just--

I'm a friend.

So am I, it seems.

ALISON: Hi, I'm here, I'm here. Hello?

DAN: Thank you.

You sure you didn't want any of my dinner?

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Your entrée was so small.

No, no, no, it was amazing. I didn't realize fish could be

creamed.

Would you like to see the dessert menu?

Oh, no, thank you. I think we're fine.

-Sure you don't want dessert? -Yeah.

Okay, well, then we'll just get the check, please.

Actually, I already took care of that earlier.

What?

Yeah, I just charged it on my mom's card. It's not a big

deal, don't worry about it.

You know, I can pay. It's not like I don't have the money.

Yeah, I'm sure you do, you just shouldn't have to spend
it here.

I don't understand. Did I do something wrong?

No. Look, I wanted a date with you, just not the date you
thought I wanted.

It's-- It's fine.

All right. All right.

Well, then... ...if it's a real Dan Humphrey date that you
want...

...then it's a real Dan Humphrey date that you're gonna

get.

-Let's go. -Really?

Yes.

GOSSIP GIRL: Spotted fleeing dessert...

...S and Lonely Boy, lighter than air and heading

downtown.

HARPER: It wasn't easy getting the entire uniform, but....

Done and done.

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What's the doorman wearing?

Don't you worry about that, Little J.

Just drink up, you're lagging behind.

JENNY: Oh, my phone.

"S.O.S. Still in prison!"

Is that Eric van der Woodsen? I thought he went home

for the weekend.

Guess it didn't happen.

Is, why don't you take the girls to Visconti?

Meet you there in an hour.

Let's ramp this up, shall we?

Truth or dare?

Oh, and you already used your truth.

So dare?

I dare you to jailbreak Eric.

-Blair. -It's perfect.

You want in and he wants out.

What's it gonna be? Do or die, Little J.

Spotlight on Little J, now put to the test by one Queen

B.

Will J take the bait and go from Brady to Britney?

Or will her goody-two-shoes mindset turn into the

night's biggest buzz kill?

Let's do it.

Surprise.

Jenny, hey, what are you doing here?

Your SOS was heard and answered. Come on, we're

breaking you out.

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Wait, how--? Wait, what do you mean "we"?

Okay, I have a problem.

I have a big problem.

Starts with a capital RX.

What drugs have you been taking?

Caffeine, nicotine, ketamine...

...GHB, PCP, LSD.

Dry-- Diazepam? Lorazepam?

All the pams, really. No, I don't discriminate.

Apparently not.

Code Yellow, Floor 6.

Why don't you wait right here?

I'll get a doctor.

And I'd love a cappuccino.

Come on, let's go.

I heard you were bored and I figured I owed you one.

-Yeah, try 50. -Okay, come on.

Get a move on, come on.

Hello?

What?

How did this happen?

He was with who?

Young, blond and beautiful.

Yup, that's his sister.

I'll find them. Thank you.

Of course.

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MAN: And another one.

DAN: Sorry, Joe.

That's game.

That's 75 bucks. I think that pays for your duck.

That it does. Thank you.

So, what now?

You play me.

-You? -Yeah, unless you're afraid to lose.

Only thing being lost would be your dignity.

-Oh, really? You think so? -Yes.

-I think so. -Rack them up. I'll buy us a soundtrack.

This better not be my wife.

Rufus, do you always answer the phone like that?

-Lily? -I need your son's cell phone number. It's an

emergency.

A real emergency or a Lily emergency?

Eric is missing.

Missing? From where?

From his room, here...

...at the hotel.

I'm trying to get in touch, he's not answering his phone.

I think he's with Serena.

Did you try her?

She left her phone here.

Your son's cell number, that's all I need.

They're on a date. If they picked Eric up along the way...

...I bet they're having fun.

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I have a situation here.

A situation? Your son is with your daughter and my kid.

I trust them, why don't you?

Rufus.

Goodbye, Lily. Always a pleasure.

Hey, baby, you wanna maybe show me the bathroom...

...get lost somewhere around coat check?

My answer's usually "never say never," but for you I'll

make an exception.

Who let the Hedge-Fund Mafia in here? I thought

matchy-matchy was over.

So Eric's here. Now it's your turn.

Truth or dare?

-You have to ask? -I dare you to make out with that guy.

Easy.

And mean it.

Watch and learn, little Humphrey.

I hope Amanda never finds out.

-Who's Amanda? -Just my girlfriend.

Amanda never has to know, does she?

I'm not telling her.

Look what I got.

I dare you to call his girlfriend. Her name's Amanda.

Done and done.

Hello? Amanda?

Hi, this is Blai--

Claire.

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Yeah, I just had my tongue down your boyfriend's

throat...

...and he neglected to tell me you existed until after it

was over.

Just thought you should know. He's a real catch.

Bye.

All right. Sleepover of the year.

Hey, everybody's gotta start somewhere.

Maybe Little J isn't so little anymore.

SERENA: Oh, no.

Game over. You lost, fair and square.

And that's squared.

Am I really that bad?

There aren't enough words to describe the kind of bad

you are.

Well, you promised if I lost again, you'd teach me.

All right, all right. That's a promise I intend to keep.

Not just for you, but for dive bars everywhere.

-All across America. -Whoo.

All right, come here.

You have to remember, in pool, it's all about--

Take this stick.

Remember, it's all about the angles. The right angle, of

course.

-Take the shot. -Okay.

-Bring your hand back, here. -Right.

And--

Wait, oh, okay, hold on.

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You gotta be slow and just follow through, all right?

Oh, this is my song. Finally. I didn't know you liked this

kind of music.

I think we've already established things you don't know

about me.

Other than your total lack of pool skills?

-What else? -That I'm having the best time right now?

That, I knew.

There's something vibrating in your pocket and I really

hope it's your phone.

DAN: Hold on.

Oh, it's my dad. He knows I'm with you, he wouldn't call

if it wasn't important.

-Oh, yeah, of course. Take it. -All right.

Hello?

What? No, no, no, he's not.

Serena left her phone at the hotel?

What? What's up?

Yeah, Dad, she's standing right here next to me.

We'll take care of it.

Wait, take care of what?

Slight change of plans.

No, no, no change of plans.

I like this plan of you teaching me the angles.

-I know. -Remember?

-Cute girl with total lack of pool skills? -I remember. So

does the table.

What could it possibly be that's more important than this

right here?

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Season 1

-Can't it wait till tomorrow? -Actually, it can't.

You need to call your brother, right now.

Hey, I was just about to--

So I made some calls, but none of my people know your

people.

Shocking, but true.

Either Dan Humphrey is an alias or your son is not very

popular.

Regardless, I need that number.

I realize when I got off the phone with you...

...that I could have been a little bit more understanding.

-You think--? -I called Dan.

Thank you.

-And your son's not with him. -He's not?

But Serena got Eric on the phone and he's okay.

And Dan said they would phone when they were all
together.

Yeah. And you didn't think to call and tell me all of this?

I was just about to.

Now, I hate to say this, but why don't you sit and wait
here?

We should hear from them soon.

Fine.

And I'll pass on a glass of that non-premium liquor that

you're drinking.

But I will take something to eat. Thank you for offering.

What? You still know how to cook, don't you?

-Do you see Jenny or your brother? -No.

-Are you her? Are you Claire? -What? No.

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Are you sure we're in the right place?

-Yeah. -Come on.

-Where is she? -Baby, what?

Who? I'm here at the club with the guys.

Hey.

Excuse me, hello.

-Where's my phone? -Hey. Let go of her.

-Who are you? -Your phone is at our table.

If you weren't drunk and drooling over every girl, you

would've seen that.

-I'm gonna kill you. -Oh, you must be Amanda, right?

Well, I would think twice before marrying him, because

he's a pig.

-Hey, hey, hey, back off of her, okay? -I don't need you
to defend me.

It wasn't even her who called you, it was me.

-Jenny? -So she's the one with the tongue?

Tongue? What are you doing? You're supposed to be at

a sleepover.

-Made out with a girl from a sleepover? -Made out with

him?

-Made out with her. -Ew.

It was a dare.

-A dare? What are you, children? -Yeah, pretty much.

She's 14.

-Fourteen? -Fourteen?

I swear, I had no idea, baby.

-I mean, look at her, she's jailbait. -What? What's that?

Dan, stay out of it, okay? You're causing more problems.

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Season 1

Only problem is the cocktail napkin you're wearing.

-That's what I'm talking about. -You're not talking--

Hey.

-All you out before I call the cops. -All right.

Hey, Serena. See, I told you everything was okay.

BOUNCER: Let's go. -Eric, come on.

Spotted. Big brother to the not-quite rescue.

Too bad no one told him, you can't save a damsel...

...if she loves her distress.

What's wrong with the sauce?

Nothing. I'm just so happy to have a home-cooked meal.

-It just needs a little salt. -What? It's perfect.

No, just a pinch.

You haven't changed a bit. You always have to be in

control.

Well, I don't remember you complaining.

Well, I wasn't allowed to. It was one of your rules.

Yeah, well, I may hold the reins a little tight, but life is
complicated.

Especially once you have kids.

When they're little, you're their whole world...

...and then, one day, the wall goes up...

...and you're on one side and they're on the other.

They don't like to admit it, but they want us to break

through.

Yeah, well, maybe Serena. But Eric? I don't know what

he wants.

You're awfully concerned about a 14-year-old boy

breaking curfew.

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Season 1

Well, it's not my curfew he's breaking.

He's been staying at the Ostroff Center.

-Ostroff Center? -Yeah.

Drugs? Drinking?

No, he's not a bad kid, he's just a lonely one.

It's depression? Is it bad?

Bad enough to try to kill himself.

-I'm sorry. -You know, I don't know why.

I don't know what I did or I didn't do, but...

...I just don't know what to do to make sure it doesn't

happen again.

All you can do is be there for them.

I hope that's Dan or Serena.

Hello?

Hey. Great.

Yeah, actually, I can tell her. His mother's here with me.

It's a long story.

Sounds good. Take care.

So he's with Dan and Serena, and everyone's fine.

All right, I should go meet them.

-I'll wrap this up. -You know what?

This isn't gonna travel well. Why don't I just...

...stay here and I can eat it quickly?

It would be a shame to let it go to waste.

-What were you thinking? BLAIR: He was bored.

-He wanted to get out, have some fun. -So you took
him to a bar?

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He didn't do anything wrong. I thought you'd be happy.

Well, I'm not, okay?

-I can't believe that you did this. -Hey, I wasn't

kidnapped, Serena.

I left of my own free will. Blair was trying to do me a

favor.

-Told you. -Well, it's no favor, Eric.

-You're in a lot of trouble. -Yeah, I know.

And you know what? It was worth it.

To be out after dark and to talk to someone...

...who isn't you or Mom, even if it is Blair.

-No offense. -None taken.

Well, I'm sorry this was the only way.

We'll work on Mom, okay?

Thanks.

And since she knows you're okay, I guess there's no real

reason to rush.

-How about we walk? -Ugh. Call me.

Yeah, I will.

I was talking to Eric.

What is wrong with you? This is not who you are.

And who are you right now? Dad?

We're not doing this now. We can do this at home.

Except I'm not going home. I'm going with my friends.

BLAIR: Coming, Jenny?

Yeah, one second.

Look, I'm sorry that things got out of hand tonight.

-To say the least. -I know who Blair and those girls are.

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But I know who I am. And I'm not gonna forget that
because I hang out with them.

Come on. We're leaving.

I'm coming.

But just let me go, please.

I mean, look, I'll be tucked in bed in a half-hour, I

promise.

-All right, all right. Yeah, go ahead. -Thank you.

-Hey. -Hey.

I gotta take him back to the center, so we should

probably just call it a night.

-What? No, I'll go with you. -No, it's okay. You don't
have to.

I want to.

Come on, let's go.

This just in: Truth or dare has gone into overtime.

Looks like no one told Little J you don't beat a Waldorf

at her own game.

JENNY: You want me to steal the jacket from the

mannequin?

-That's right. -Blair, it's your mom's store.

I mean, you could have anything you want.

So can you. Unless you don't want to.

Which is totally understandable. And I wouldn't judge you

for that.

-I don't get it. -Then you don't have to do it.

It's just a shame, because you've come so far.

The jacket?

Just the jacket.

Oh, God.

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Five, four, three...

...two, one.

Okay, come on, we're out of here.

Guys, come back. Let me out.

Are you still the same guy you were when I took this
photo?

RUFUS: What? You took that photo? You weren't even at

that show.

Oh, excuse me.

If I remember, the first song was about me.

The second one was about your motorcycle.

And then there was the one about that surf town. What
was it?

-Sayulita. -Sayulita.

Fisherman's town.

Was that the one with the villa, where we...?

Yes, indeed it was.

God, I must've taken eight rolls of film that night.

Why did you give up photography, anyway?

You loved it so much.

Well, I guess I figured social climbing would be more

fulfilling.

I even remember the black dress I wore that night.

-Really? -Yeah.

You know, I think it may have actually been blue.

I thought you said you didn't remember me being there.

Can you grab that, Lil? And if it's my son, be nice to him.

Hello? Humphrey residence.

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Hi, Alison.

Yeah, it's Lily.

Yeah, hold on, just--

Alison?

Looks like you're gonna have some explaining to do.

Trust me, I don't owe Alison any explanation right now.

You know what? I've overstayed my welcome.

Okay.

I hope everything turns out all right.

Yeah, me too. Thanks for babysitting me.

And thank you for being such a good friend.

Yeah, it was almost fun.

Good night, Rufus.

I'm gonna need you to show me some form of

identification.

I'm only 14, I don't have any.

What are you doing out at this hour?

-I-- -What's your name?

My name is Blair Waldorf. This is my mother's shop.

Her name is Eleanor.

I left my jacket here earlier, which irritates my mother to

no end.

And I completely forgot about the alarm.

All right, what's your home phone number so we can call

her?

She's not home, but she's in Paris until Thursday.

It's six hours ahead, if you wanna call.

She's gonna be so angry.

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Well, look, we can't just let you go without confirming

your story.

I have my own set of keys.

You could watch me lock up.

Well, I can see why your brother would wanna leave.

That place is very depressing.

And yet it's designed to treat depression.

He's a good kid, Eric. He is.

Yeah. Jenny's not so bad either.

Yeah?

-Yeah. -Yeah, I know, I know.

I just worry about her sometimes.

Well, worry looks cute on you.

Look, I've seen Jenny in action.

And my hunch is she doesn't get pushed in anything she

doesn't wanna do.

No, I know, I know, it's just....

She's never mentioned her idea of a great Friday night...

...consists of painting her face full of makeup... ...and

stumbling out to a hip bar in high heels...

...hanging out with drunk Wall Streeters who don't even

care if she has a name.

Maybe that wasn't her idea of a great Friday night.

-What do you mean? -It's okay for her to wanna be

friends...

-...with people she goes to school with. -Why? I'm not.

And if you made half the effort she did, maybe we

would've met a long time ago.

That's true.

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And so maybe you would have kissed me already.

No five-star restaurants...

...no Town Car.

No smoky pool hall or bad '80s music.

Looks like we finally found common ground.

ERIC: Hey, Mom. -Hey.

-Sorry about tonight. -Oh, we'll talk about it in the

morning.

After you've had a good night's sleep in your own bed.

I'm going home?

I'm not sure exactly how this is gonna work, you know.

Hey, I'm not worried.

It's a good thing I didn't unpack.

Catch.

Jenny?

Well, well, looks like you came to play after all.

You know which trundle bed is yours.

Sleep tight, you've earned it.

Actually, I'm going home.

But thanks for inviting me, it was a blast.

What do you mean you're going home? Nobody ever

leaves a sleepover.

Well, I guess there's a first for everything.

Oh, and I'm keeping the jacket, if that's okay with you.

Monday, lunch on the steps?

Done and done.

Word is Jenny Humphrey killed at Blair Waldorf's

sleepover.

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It was a debut the likes of which haven't been seen...

...since Blair herself.

If Blair's gotta watch her back, Serena needs to keep an

eye on her heart.

We hear it may have been stolen by Lonely Boy.

Putting out an APB, Gossip Girl.

End

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06. 시중녀의 이야기

Main Actor: Blake Lively, Leighton Meester, Penn Badgley, Chace Crawford, Edward Westwick,
Kaylee Defer, Kelly Rutherford, Matthew Settle

Transcribed by: Justin

Provided by: https://blog.naver.com/uzupis

GOSSIP GIRL: And who am I?

That's one secret I'll never tell.

You know you love me. XOXO...

...Gossip Girl.

Long ago, when European royals grew bored with palace

balls...

...they took a page from the peons, and added some

pageantry.

Couture and canapés are just another Saturday night.

Until you add a mask.

But preparing for a ball is an event in itself.

Which is why queens invented handmaidens.

Dresses should be delivered, I'll take the small stuff.

Which one's yours?

Oh, no, I'm just helping Blair. But I mean, you know, we'll
see.

Well, here's hoping.

-We'll put it on Blair's tab. -Oh, no, no, no--

The girls at that party are my best customers.

Why not show off my latest wares? Just return it after the
ball.

SERENA: So Kati mentioned something about a custom-

made corset.

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-And I hear there are wigs involved? -It's a masquerade.

You have to conceal your identity.

But I do have something special planned for Nate

tonight.

It's a game. It's a scavenger hunt.

Nate starts with a clue, which leads him to a lady-in-

waiting...

...who gives him a clue to the--

Wait, you have ladies?

If he finds me before midnight when the masks come

off, he can claim his prize.

And what's that?

Yeah, right. Sorry.

I just figured that after everything that's happened...

...or hasn't happened, I should find some way to make

it special.

Well, that's really romantic, Blair.

Really.

Look, if you don't want me to come tonight, I totally

understand.

What? No, I want you to come.

In fact, I was hoping you'd be one of my ladies.

Would you give Nate the last clue?

Are you sure you want me to?

Tonight is all about starting over.

I trust you.

And him.

Well, then I will be honored to serve you, my queen.

Well, besides, you're bringing Dan, right?

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DAN: A ball? -Haven't you heard? Your sister's

Cinderella.

And let me guess, your wicked stepsister is Blair Waldorf.

Blair may have asked me to do things, I'm happy to help.

-If she helps with an invite and outfit? -It'll be worth it.

Everyone in disguise, in this old ballroom, it's gonna be

amazing.

I'm actually surprised Serena didn't mention it.

Why? We've only been out twice.

It's not like we have to do everything together.

I gotta go deliver this stuff.

Let me know if you need me to pick you up a tux.

What?

It's a masked ball. She thinks I'd never go to something

that pretentious.

Which shows she knows me well.

I know him. A masked ball.

Dan would never go to something that pretentious.

-Where he has to wear a mask and a tux. -He likes you.

He would wear a tux, and a mask and one of my mother's

dresses...

...if it meant that he could go out with you.

Are you worried that he already has a date? I mean, he

is Dan Humphrey.

Shut up.

I don't know. I guess a masked ball is better than a

regular party.

All those kids from school that he hates, he won't even

recognize them.

-All right, invite him, I insist. -I'm not saying I wouldn't

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go.

If Serena asked me, I wouldn't deprive her of my

company.

-No, that would be too cruel. -But she hasn't asked me,
so.

If you wanna go with her, just make it happen, put

yourself out there.

This happens in a matter of hours.

The window for bold gestures is officially closed.

Is that her?

No, it's Vanessa.

Vanessa? That's been a while.

-You gonna answer that? -Of course, why wouldn't I?

Hello? Vanessa.

WOMAN: Hi, yeah, it's me.

So, what's up? So how's Vermont?

Do you still have my copy of The Crying of Lot 49?

Um, I don't know.

Well, could you check?

I haven't talked to you in over a year, you call to ask me

about an old book?

You know, it could be anywhere.

Try over by the window.

-Vanessa. -Surprise.

What?

-Oh, my God, so nice to see you. -How are you?

I can't believe you're here. What are you doing here?

My parents said I could finish high school in the city.

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Season 1

-So that means you're-- -I'm back for good.

-That is-- -Awesome, I hope.

Yeah, totally.

Yes, of course. It's just unexpected, you know.

Unexpectedly awesome.

Go ahead, answer that. I'm starving, and I smell waffles.

-Rufus. RUFUS: Vanessa?

VANESSA: Surprise. -Serena, hey.

Hey, hi.

BLAIR: Go ahead, do it.

Uh.... Hey, I was just wondering, are you doing anything

tonight?

Tonight? No, no, nothing, why?

Good, because there's this thing, and you're probably

gonna think it's stupid--

Try me.

Even cold, these are so good.

I've missed Rufus' cooking. I have.

-Rufus, do you have whipped cream? -Who is that?

It's my sister.

You were saying something.

Hi, Blair. What do you want me to do with this stuff?

Oh, just leave them over there, that's fine. I left you
another list.

DAN: Hello? Is anyone there?

I'm sorry, what?

You were asking me something.

No. Uh.... No, never mind.

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-Thank you, have a good day. -Okay.

Bye.

So, what are we doing tonight?

I think I need a date.

Damn it, Anne. I told you no starch.

Howard, we've been going to the same cleaners for 19

years.

Your shirts are exactly how they always are. We know

this isn't about laundry.

Sorry, but I need everything to be perfect at Eleanor's

party tonight.

I can't screw up.

Eleanor knows you're the best person to take her

company public.

She's going to pick you.

Just show up and be yourself.

I'm gonna call you from the office. I gotta look over the
proposal one more time.

NATE: Hey, Mom. -Oh, Nate.

Is everything okay with Dad?

Just work stuff, nothing for you to worry about.

Sure.

God, I love New York.

There was only one theater in Woodbury, and all it ever

played were family movies.

The Pacifier played for like a year.

And they said Vin Diesel couldn't do comedy.

I can't pick, overwhelmed by choice. Whatever you want.

Yeah, sure, whatever.

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Season 1

You do wanna do something, right?

I mean, you don't have plans.

Big night out with overprivileged, underparented brats

from your school?

-Yeah, the limo's waiting back at the loft. -Good, we

can egg it, slash the tires?

So is it weird having me back?

No, why would it be weird?

Because you said some things the night that I left.

Things that you immediately asked me to take back.

Because I was leaving, but now I'm here.

Yeah, and it's been over a year, you know.

A lot has happened, actually. I look forward to hearing

about it, tonight.

Late show, Angelika. Whatever's playing.

-Unless it's The Pacifier. -Unless it's The Pacifier.

All right, I'll get tickets.

Glad to be home, Humphrey.

Glad to have you, Abrams.

CHUCK: So, what exactly are you looking for?

Evidence.

Of what?

Captain's dislike of starchy shirts?

I totally sympathize, the collars chafe.

Did you ask him about your missing college money?

Yeah, said he was moving accounts around. It was all

back the next day.

So why worry? Mysterious financial transactions, warring

parents.

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Season 1

Welcome to the Upper East Side.

Chi Chi, get the yeyo. Nathaniel, I'm shocked.

-Thought you were strictly an herbal man. -This isn't

mine.

BLAIR: Who does this Dan Humphrey think he is?

Serena is putting up a strong front, but I can see how

hurt she is.

-We have to help heal her heart. -But it's pretty late
notice.

-The good ones are already taken. -No more excuses.

Serena must have the hottest date.

He's got plans, he'll change them. Got a girlfriend, he'll

dump her.

If he's out of town, he'll charter a G5 and fly home.

Make it happen.

MAN: Do you like it? ELEANOR: That's outstanding.

-Is it a bong, Mother? -Please.

-I didn't take you for a stoner. -It's a--

A hookah, and it is adorable.

It's perfect for my Moroccan-themed party.

Why do you have to celebrate your Bendel's deal...

...by turning our penthouse into an opium den?

Why not?

BLAIR [ON RECORDING]: Hey, it's Blair.

Sorry I can't come to the phone, I'm getting ready for the
masked ball.

See you tonight, if you recognize me, which you won't.

Hey, Blair, it's me.

I....

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Look, I just really need to talk to you.

It's....

There's this thing with my dad, and....

You know, I just--

I really need to talk to you, so can you call me back when

you can?

Thanks.

Well, that's all of it.

Thank you, I don't know what I would've done without

you.

That's okay. Yeah, it was fun.

I'm glad. It's all part of your education.

And it looks like you're learning.

That's a nice bracelet. Vintage, right?

The diamonds look real.

That's because they sort of are.

The man at the store lent it to me.

Why would he do that?

Sweetie, you didn't think you were gonna be able to

come tonight, right?

I thought maybe, yeah.

Jenny, freshmen don't get to go to the masked ball.

-It's just tradition. -No, I know.

-It's just that there were five dresses. -Oh, it--

You always need back-up.

What if I spilled something or a zipper broke?

Yeah, of course. I'll remember that.

-Have fun tonight. -I will.

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Season 1

And don't worry, your time will come, I promise.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to get ready.

Do you think that Eleanor Waldorf will find this "night in

Tangiers" enough?

Maybe if you brought a goat. Eleanor always goes all out.

Speaking of going all out.

SERENA: Yeah, I know. Tell me about it.

I don't think the Waldorf women ever met a theme they

didn't just love.

You're going with Dan?

-Um.... No, Dan has plans actually. -Doing what?

The question is, with whom?

Oh, I didn't realize.

Well, frankly, I am relieved.

You know, at your age, you should be playing the field.

What about at your age? You got a hot date tonight?

What? No, please. Who would I be dating?

You know what? I'm gonna go try this on and see if I can
find a goat.

SERENA: Well, he's no Dan, but I guess he'll do.

Hey, Jen, you're not gonna believe this, but Vanessa is

back in town.

So we're going to a movie.

I don't know if you're going to that ball, I was wondering

if you wanted to come.

So we're getting tickets online.

Call me back.

GOSSIP GIRL: Why is it that friends of Serena van der

Woodsen...

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...have to search for her suitor?

Have fables fallen so out of fashion...

...that princesses have to do everything themselves?

Call us old school, but sometimes the fairy tale ending...

...requires the knight to get off his ass and saddle up his
steed.

DAN: Maybe it's never too late for a bold gesture.

SERENA: Nate, hey.

What are you doing here? I thought you were....

-Shouldn't you be getting ready? -I'm sorry to bother

you.

It's....

Do you have a minute?

-Yeah, of course, come in. -Thanks.

Maybe it's old.

Left over from the '90s, from some night at Limelight or

the Tunnel?

Our parents did worse stuff than we do.

It's not old. And it makes total sense.

I think he's having some money problems.

-Well, have you asked him about it? -Yup.

I just wish-- You know, I wish he'd be honest with me.

It's like he and my mom, they made some secret pact to

act like robots.

I don't think that pact is so secret. I think all parents

signed it.

But I'm not a little kid anymore. He doesn't have to shut

me out.

If what you think is right, he's probably really scared.

Maybe you have to tell him how you feel more than

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once...

...for him to really hear you.

Hey, don't give up, okay?

You should probably go. You know, I've gotta get ready
and stuff.

Yeah, me too.

-Thanks for just, you know, listening. -It's fine, don't

worry about it.

Chuck just wanted to bump.

And Blair's phone was turned off, so it really means a

lot.

Yeah, anytime, Nate.

I'll see you tonight, okay?

All right, I'll see you, bye.

Hey, anybody home?

-Hey, you and Dan going out? -Just to the movies.

What about you?

A Humphrey man in a sports coat?

-I'd normally ask if you had a date, but-- -But my wife

left me.

Yeah, what's up with Alison? Dan says she's still upstate.

-I thought that was just for the summer. -So did her
husband.

Okay, we'll circle back to that.

-One issue at a time. -Like, where are my keys?

What do you need keys for? Use Dan's window.

Where is Dan, by the way?

He should be back in a minute.

-So Dan seems happy to see you. -Why wouldn't he be?

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Season 1

Well, if you don't mind me saying so.

When you left here, you kind of broke his heart.

I'm back, aren't I?

I hated being away from the city.

Away from Dan.

You tell Dan this?

No, not yet. But I'm planning on it tonight.

Before or after the movie, I'm not sure yet.

Yeah, I gotta pick my moment.

It's kind of a big deal.

Ooh. Thanks.

You know, there's a lot that's changed since you were

here.

So Dan says.

But you guys have always been close. You'll figure it out.

-Wish me luck? -Me too.

-Where are you going anyway? -Just some party.

With a friend?

I wouldn't exactly call her that.

See you.

-Hello. -Hey, where are you?

-At your house. -Oh, you're early.

Yeah, I just couldn't wait.

I tried to get you before you left. I feel terrible.

Because I'm early?

No, because, um, I....

I totally spaced.

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I have this American History paper due Monday.

So, you know, I'll be writing all night.

I'll make it up to you, though, I promise.

Pirogis at Veselka?

I'll call you tomorrow.

Jenny, hey.

Hey.

Jenny, what's wrong?

-And how is this a favor to me again? -Rufus, look

around.

When was the last time you had access to the top people
in music and art?

Introduce yourself, revitalize your career.

Put that sad little gallery on the cultural radar.

Since when are you the saint of former rock stars?

Since when were you a star?

Leave if you want to, really.

Alison would have a fit if she knew you were

accompanying me to this party.

Even if it was for your benefit.

Actually, I don't care what Alison thinks right now.

Good. Then let me introduce you to our hostess.

Eleanor, it is divine. Squint and it's Marrakesh.

Oh, Lily, I had no idea you were bringing a date. How

delightful.

-Oh, it's not a date. -This is Rufus Humphrey.

-Pleasure. -It's not a date.

-Look, appetizers, is that couscous? -Yes, please.

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BART: Hey. ELEANOR: Bart.

-And friend. -Hi.

-Something catch your eye? -Oh, I like her outfit.

-Lily. -Bart.

-Hello. -Hi.

I'd like you to meet Karissa.

-Yeah, hi, Karissa. -Hi.

-Hi, Rufus. -Hi, Rufus.

Hi.

Well, so good to see you.

Great to see you.

-Enjoy. -You too.

Good night.

You and Bart Bass? Suddenly, it all makes sense.

-Brought me to make him jealous. -Don't be ridiculous.

I mean, it's flattering, I guess, but couldn't you have

done a little better?

Not on such short notice.

Eleanor, salaam alaikum.

How are you? This is fantastic.

-Beautiful. -God bless you.

So this Blair girl used you as her slave.

No, I was her handmaiden. "Handmaiden" is Jane Austen

for "slave."

She never said I'd get to go to the ball if I did all those
errands.

Uh-uh. Don't make excuses for her. You did all that stuff,
you deserve to go.

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Season 1

-You said masked balls were pretentious. -One

woman's opinion.

But if you wanna go, no Blair should keep you away.

It's not just Blair. I don't have a gown.

My friend works in the costume department at BAM. We

can borrow one. Next?

-I don't have an invitation. -Every ballroom has a back

door.

What else?

If Blair saw me, she'd be furious.

Then it's a good thing you'll be wearing a mask.

On the Upper East Side, appearances are often

deceiving.

From friends to hair color, there's always more than

meets the eye.

Is uptown this way or that way?

It's that way.

These things whizzing by, they're cars. You might wanna

avoid them.

You know what? You'll see better without this too.

Oh, that is better.

-Hey, you got a name? -Jack Altman.

Jack Altman. I just stepped out for some air.

Altman? Okay.

Thank you.

Wait, let me see.

Okay, I know you're completely morally opposed to

society events and stuff, but--

We'll deprogram you later. This is ugly.

-Just go. -Okay, thanks.

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VANESSA: Thank you so much.

What was it we said about appearances?

Yes, they can be deceiving.

But most of the time, what you see is what you get.

Hey, have you seen that girl I was with?

When I grabbed her bag, I got her house keys too.

What is Nate doing? He's supposed to go find Kati and

Is.

-It's getting late, I'm losing heat. -You look ravishing.

If I were your man, I wouldn't need clues to find you.

-Or to ravish me, I'm sure. -Who is that?

BLAIR: Probably some bitch from Chapin. -A hot bitch

from Chapin.

Forget her, go get Nate, point him in the right direction.

First things first.

Well, hello, angel.

You must be my lucky night.

And with taste to boot.

Apparently, not. I'm talking to you.

Beautiful and mean. I've got chills. Care to dance with a

poor devil?

Why don't we just skip all that and go somewhere quiet

to talk?

I'll get the champagne.

Find me in five.

Taking a company public is an enormous responsibility.

Nothing more valuable than a good first impression. You

taught me that.

Captain, you know that I adore you, but you've never

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done fashion before.

I've been talking to Calvin's people, and I have to say...

...the presentation is impressive.

Enough business talk. You're boring her.

Eleanor, I've been thinking when Nate and Blair get

engaged...

...she should have my great grandmother's ring.

The one that Cornelius Vanderbilt gave her. Huh.

RUFUS: Still spying on him? -I'm not spying.

I'm just keeping track of his whereabouts. So long as

you're watching, he's winning.

You wanna make a man jealous, there's one thing to do.

I invited you here for many reasons, but knowledge of

romance is not--

That was unexpected.

Give him 20 minutes.

-I need a drink. -I need a drink.

So every time we see their yacht now...

...we just pull out our air horns and let them rip.

Tell you, it is almost enough to make you never wanna

summer in Newport again.

Wow, that sounds awful.

It is, it's pretty bad.

Yeah, you know, if you'll excuse me, I think I'm gonna

go--

To change partners?

-Hey. -Dan, what are you doing here?

-Saving you. -I don't need to be saved.

Really? Because I could see your eyes rolling from

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across the room.

Dan.

-Hey. -Blair sent us over.

It's late, you're taking too long.

Your lady-in-waiting's closer than you think. Her

headdress is feathers of black and pink.

-It's her. -It's me.

What? I'm sorry.

Just find Serena, she'll lead you to Blair.

Serena, right.

Let's play a game. I'd say strip poker, but I don't have
cards.

How about hide-and-seek?

You hide, I'll seek.

And how will you find me? I don't have any breadcrumbs.

Well....

You can leave me a trail of your clothes.

I have truly died and gone to heaven.

So how are you doing?

Serena, hey.

-What are you doing here? -What am I doing?

I ran across the city, I rented a tuxedo.

I stole this mask from some drunken kid only to look like
Robin.

I conned my way in here, all to see you.

I care.

You didn't seem to care when you were with another girl
and lied about it.

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What? Whoa, whoa, whoa. I didn't--

Well, I did.

-Yeah. -I did, but I can explain that.

Go ahead. Give it your best shot.

I was with my friend, Vanessa.

We're very close, and she moved away to Vermont last

year, now she's back.

Okay, so why did you lie and say it was Jenny?

Because I'm an idiot. I don't know why.

Look, Vanessa and I....

Our relationship is a little complicated.

Or it was, before I met you.

And honestly, I didn't want anything to get in the way of

you inviting me...

...to this stupid party.

Well, I was gonna invite you.

Really?

So not into Pompous Ass IV?

Are you saying you're not into old friend Vanessa?

That is exactly what I'm saying.

Oh, yes, the other part we love about a masquerade?

When the mask finally comes off, and the truth is

revealed to all.

Will you excuse me? I just saw the last person I expected
to see.

-Yeah, how can you say no to that? -I'm sorry.

Vanessa, Vanessa. Hey, this is a surprise.

-Funny, I could say the same thing. -What are you doing
here?

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Writing an American History paper. Wait, that was

supposed to be you.

-When do we start lying to each other? -I merely

refrained from sharing the truth.

Which sounded more like a lie than what I told you.

-Humphrey. -I didn't understand that either, I admit.

But what was I going to say?

That I was renting a tuxedo to attend a masked ball...

...without a mask or an invitation to go get a girl...

...who not only has a mask and an invitation, but another

date?

At least it's honest.

-You hate this world. -So do you.

-Or so I thought. -All right, what's going on here

exactly?

Did you follow me here to prove that I was lying?

Yes, Dan. That's why I'm here.

I stalked you, because I am so obsessed with you. Wait,

don't stop there.

You're the reason I came back, because I just couldn't

stop thinking about you.

-I get the point, lay off the sarcasm. -How about I lay
off the whole evening?

-Bye. -Wait, wait, wait, stop.

Look, listen, I'm sorry.

-I'm sorry that I lied about writing a-- -You said you
love me.

Loved you in the past.

And in a pre-shaving, 16-year-old kind of way.

You know, I mean, things have changed.

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VANESSA: Clearly.

Looks like someone's traded up.

So that's....

Vanessa, yeah, she's....

Beautiful.

I have to go out there. I'm sorry.

Feel free to find me.

-I found your pants. -Well, you're getting warmer.

Which is an achievement, considering you're already hot.

Well, you better hope it doesn't get cold.

What is that supposed to mean?

Hey, what the hell? Hey, my phone is in my pants.

Hey, I'm stuck up here, bitch.

DAN: Vanessa.

Vanessa, wait, please.

Why won't you wait?

Oh, because you're not Vanessa, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, case of mistaken identity.

Ironically, not involving masks.

WOMAN: Right.

Lily, there you are.

I just needed a moment, that--

-What just happened. -The kiss?

-Yeah, it made me feel-- -Nostalgic?

-Nauseous. -Right. Um, ouch.

No, I'm kidding.

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Kind of.

I'm sorry, Rufus. Maybe I shouldn't have asked you here.

Right.

And I'm sorry I kissed you.

But I did it because that mercenary in the starched white

shirt...

...he doesn't appreciate everything you have... ...over an

attractive 25-year-old mannequin...

...because beauty fades, though yours has done a

remarkable job of holding on.

And in the long run, it's gonna be his loss.

And I thought he should know how it feels to lose you.

Because, trust me, it's not fun.

I think it worked.

Lily, may I speak with you for a moment?

If you'll excuse us.

Happy to help.

SERENA: Jenny?

-Hey. -Serena.

-Um, look, you didn't see me here, okay? -Yeah, don't

worry about it.

Just one in a series of things I'll pretend didn't happen

tonight.

-Is everything okay? -I'm not sure.

-Dan surprised me by showing up here. -Well, go, Dan.

Yeah, except he threw me for a loop by chasing after

some girl named Vanessa.

No, V's Dan's best friend.

Yeah, well, they seemed like a little more than that.

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They've kind of got a history, don't they?

Sure.

But, I mean, Dan's never liked a girl like he likes you.

Really, I mean, come on. He's at a masked ball.

And I think he'd go basically anywhere with you.

Except for the Ice Capades, because that really freaked

him out when he was 5.

You know what? I--

I think I'll go and try to find him.

Don't know how I'm gonna find anyone. Stupid mask

keeps falling over my eyes.

Well, I'd give you mine, but masks come off at

midnight...

...and I kind of need my disguise to get out of here.

Well, you know what? You wanna trade?

-Sure. -Thanks.

And here, take this. It's so hot in here, and you'll

probably be cold outside.

Here you go.

Hey, did you have fun tonight?

It was everything I hoped.

Good.

-Okay, let's see. -Here.

-Oh, thanks. -Pretty.

Serena, just don't say anything and let me explain.

Oh, my God.

I'm trying to do the right thing, it's killing me.

We both care about Blair, but maybe the best thing is to

tell her the truth.

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I'm not over you. And I thought I could fight it, but I can't.

And if you don't stop me, I'm gonna kiss you.

SERENA: Nate?

Nate, what are you doing? You have to find Blair.

Whatever, just forget the clues.

She's wearing big tall boots and a big old crown. Just
go, okay?

Hurry.

Serena, have you seen Nate? Hey.

PEOPLE: Five, four, three, two, one. -Jenny.

-It's midnight. -Masks off.

Serena.

Serena. Serena, wait.

I'm so sorry. Serena.

Little Jenny Humphrey manages to get my pants off and

have me not enjoy it.

Quite the accomplishment.

Good thing someone was as lecherous as you or you'd

still be up on that roof.

And, no, I don't wanna know what you had to do to get

that tux.

This is me.

All right, Chuck, I'll see you in the a.m.

No, you didn't find me by midnight. No happily ever after

for you.

Blair, I'm sorry.

All I wanted was for us to start over.

And you didn't even try.

CHUCK: Well, at least somebody's having a good night.

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SERENA: Hello? -Serena, hey.

Will you please just talk to me, please?

Why did you run away from me?

What are you talking about? You're the one that ran
away.

I don't think so.

Blonde hair, yellow dress, black furry thing. There's only

one Serena van der Woodsen.

SERENA: Yeah, no, not tonight.

Let me say, for the record, I like you.

Only you.

Well, that's good, because I feel the same about you.

Glad that's cleared up.

Hey, um, you know, I hear the Ice Capades are coming
to town.

If you're there, so am I.

Hey.

You guys are up late.

We were celebrating.

Eleanor Waldorf has agreed to let your father's firm...

...take her company public.

Congrats, that's great news.

It is, which is why I was looking for a wine opener.

So I could surprise your father with Margaux. Which is

how I found this.

Well?

What do you have to say for yourself, Nate?

-What? -Well, it isn't mine.

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And it isn't your father's.

So that only leaves one other person in this house.

Hey, you're still up.

-Yeah, I'm not that tired. -Oh, I am, I'm exhausted.

I ended up going to that ball actually.

-Oh, really? -Yeah.

Well, your night's not over.

There's someone here to see you.

Pirogis? I come in peace.

Great, because I'm starving.

-Look-- -Save it, Humphrey.

You've never done contrite well.

Besides, I'm the one who should apologize.

No, really, I am. I should've told you about Serena.

-I should've asked you. -I shouldn't have lied about

tonight.

And I shouldn't have run out on you.

Look, if we're gonna be friends again, we're gonna have

to figure this stuff out.

You're right.

And I've missed having a friend.

I've missed being one.

We can start slow, with the basics.

Like fewer lies, more Ukrainian food?

And you telling me about everything I missed while I was

gone?

Such as Serena.

Well, she's pretty fantastic, almost as good as this

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pirogi.

Yeah, she's got this crazy mother who's always sparring

with me.

And this best friend who's very hard for me to deal with.

The best friend's boyfriend is the hardest to deal with.

It's all very complicated. It's very complicated.

End

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07. 오해와 상처

Main Actor: Blake Lively, Leighton Meester, Penn Badgley, Chace Crawford, Edward Westwick,
Kaylee Defer, Kelly Rutherford, Matthew Settle

Transcribed by: Justin

Provided by: https://blog.naver.com/uzupis

WOMAN: Where has she been?

GOSSIP GIRL: And who am I?

That's one secret I'll never tell.

You know you love me. XOXO...

...Gossip Girl.

GOSSIP GIRL: Have you heard, Upper East Siders?

Burlesque is all the rage again.

And sometimes a little raging is exactly what you need.

And as always, Chuck's aiming to be ahead of the

curves.

-Who's that girl? -I have no idea.

But let's not get ahead of ourselves.

BLAIR: You want your dad to invest in a strip joint.

-How midtown. -A burlesque club.

A place where people can be transported to another

time.

And they can feel free to let loose, no judgment, pure

escape.

What happens at Victrola stays at Victrola.

Well, it does have franchise potential. Chuck Bass.

I do believe all your years of underage boozing and

womanizing...

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Season 1

...have finally paid off. Truly, I am proud.

And you are my toughest critic. Well, second toughest.

So you think your father will go for it?

It is exactly the kind of innovative thinking upon which

the Bass empire was built.

-It is perfect. I've been waiting for this. -We are so

late. Are you coming?

Gotta pitch it to Bart.

Victory party. Here, tomorrow.

-I wouldn't miss it. -I'll send a car.

BLAIR: Don't be nervous. He's gonna love it.

ANNE: They all seem very discreet. It's up to you.

You will choose a facility and you will get the help you
need.

After our dinner with the Waldorfs tomorrow night, of

course.

Unless you'd like to ruin the celebration honoring your

father's business.

Anne, it's all right. Let me talk to him.

-How could you not tell her the drugs--? -You're not
gonna end up in these places.

Let me talk to her. You know how your mother

overreacts.

-Yeah, it's Mom who has the problem. -Look, work's

been kicking my ass lately.

The old man doesn't wear the hours as well as he used

to.

This young viper at the office, Frank Meltzer, saw me

fading one night...

...so he offered me a pick-me-up. It was stupid. I

didn't even like it.

Hey, I'll flush the bag right now, all right?

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Season 1

-Dad, I just want you to be-- -Look.

Let's not put a damper on the upcoming festivities.

I've landed the Waldorf account and my son has landed

the Waldorf.

So that's it?

Hey, I'm not cutting the conversation short.

Drinks after school at the club? Non-alcoholic, of

course.

JENNY: You don't understand, Vanessa.

The store lent it to me. If I don't find it, Blair is gonna

kill me.

It's under her name and she doesn't even know I went.

RUFUS: No, Alison, I said that two weeks ago.

Dad, have you seen a bracelet? Round, silverish,

sparkly?

Yeah, I saw that next to that ambiguous vague thing by

the nondescript place.

He hasn't seen it.

No, Alison, I haven't told them anything yet.

Well, what should I be telling them when I don't even

know what's--?

-Who are you talking to? -Your mother.

Tell her I say hi.

Jenny says hello. Who are you talking to?

Where's the other Humphrey?

-Ow. Brick. Not comfortable. -All right, here. I'll take

one for the team.

Oh, yeah, this is definitely not very comfortable.

You think all the money that we spend on this school...

...they could give us a spot to make out.

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Or a better chemistry teacher. Mr. Peiser is a little

weird.

You're thinking about Mr. Peiser right now?

We are at school.

GIRL: Hey, Serena. Why don't you get a room?

Well, that's the plight of the Manhattan teenager. No

cars.

You know, we could find a place more private.

-Our parents aren't always home. -That's true. They

must eventually leave.

The problem is waiting for eventually.

What's the rush?

It's not like this sucks. Minus the brick and the
paparazzi.

GOSSIP GIRL: Spotted: Serena and Not-So-Lonely

Boy... ...clearly past courtship in the courtyard.

Bye.

You know, we should talk about this, though. About us.

-About eventually. -Definitely, yes, yes.

Or we could just get it over with in a broom closet.

In a broom closet. That is rich, Serena.

Mr. Peiser's waiting.

GOSSIP GIRL: But can Brooklyn keep up with the

Uptown Express?

Oh. Serena, right?

That's funny.

-Mm. Not really, no. -No.

-What are you doing in the girls' hall? -I was actually

looking for you.

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Season 1

I didn't mean anything I said about having feelings for

Serena.

Maybe you didn't.

I just-- I mean, I don't even care, but other people

might.

-Yeah, I know. -Yeah, including my brother.

You brought me chocolates?

Well, I know you care about being friends with Blair.

And your brother, he's with Serena, and I'm with Blair.

And I just really need you to help me out here.

Promise?

-Promise what? -Uh....

Promise to help me come up with a more creative

apology than these.

-Sorry for taking you for granted lately. -That is so

sweet.

You know, I prefer the Gold Collection, but thank you.

Hey, Cinderella.

I think you dropped this at the ball.

I hate secrets more than anything. You know that.

Friends don't lie.

And we're friends, right?

[CHUCKLES] Right.

GOSSIP GIRL: Jenny Humphrey's rise to the

penthouse... ...has been short and sweet.

But if she crosses Blair Waldorf, it's straight back to the

basement.

Looks like this little lamb needs to stay silent or else....

BART: When can I go public with you? -My kids have to

know first.

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Season 1

Well, your secret's safe with me.

CHUCK: Father? BART: Chuck.

Um-- Well, Bart, I think your points earlier were

excellent...

...and I plan to bring them up at the next parent-

teacher meeting.

Thank you, Lily.

Not much future as an actress.

You don't say anything to Serena. You don't say

anything to anyone.

Lily would like this to play out in a certain way.

So you're serious about her?

What's with the business formal? Are you being

arraigned for something?

I have an investment idea I think is utterly unique to

your company.

Something avant-garde yet nostalgic.

It is the perfect way for you to loosen the top button of

Bass, Inc.

Like you've been wanting, sir.

I am so pleased.

You are?

Are you kidding? Do you know how long I've been

waiting...

...for you to be interested in something other than

partying?

You should come see the place. It sells itself.

-I have some meetings, but how's after--? -After is

great.

After is good.

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So I heard on Gossip Girl that you were having sex with

Dan out here.

In streaming video.

Oh, God. Katy and Is filmed us?

It's all very High School Musical scandalous.

-Ha-ha-ha. -And, no, they haven't streamed it yet.

But....

I heard it was aggressive.

I must say, Dan has been surprisingly good at

everything we've done.

-Which is? Everything? -No.

But feel free to ask any personal questions.

-But you've talked about it, right? -No, Mom, we

haven't.

May I remind you that this is your first real boyfriend, S?

In relationships, you talk about stuff.

I know, but I don't know, sometimes talking about it or

planning it...

...can ruin a good thing, you know?

I would know.

Well, as long as you're not worried.

Well, I'm not but I don't know, he might be.

Is it possible for a guy to wanna slow things down?

Only the guys we like.

But with you?

Can't imagine why.

-How was I? -I don't know. Let's ask the judges.

I was gonna give you a three, but since you're a virgin,

I gave an extra point.

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Season 1

Hey, I chose to wait.

Sex is meaningful, like art. And you don't rush art.

Who's Art? Did you sleep with him?

RUFUS: Did you sleep with him? Did you or did you not
sleep with him?

Alison, I did encourage you to do your paintings, not

the next-door neighbor.

Hello? Hello?

Ah. I didn't realize you were home. Sorry you had to

hear that.

Well, I did. Something about mom and a neighbor?

Yeah, it's complicated.

Mom's having an affair. It's easy when you say it.

Not to your son.

She hasn't exactly been rushing back to us. It's good to

know why.

JENNY: I'm home.

What's going on, Dad?

Nothing. I've just gotta get some groceries.

-Dan? -Sorry, Jen, I got a lot of homework.

-Hey, Dad, I'm like 10 blocks away. CAPTAIN: What?

Oh, sorry, Nate, I have to take a rain check on our

drink.

-Why? -Client in crisis.

Can't get out of the office. But I'll be home as soon as

I can.

-Dad, our talk was kind of important. -It's business,

Nate.

You understand, right? We'll talk later.

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Season 1

GOSSIP GIRL: Looks like parents can be deceiving on

both sides of the bridge.

You are really talented.

CHUCK: Dad.

I didn't think you'd make it.

You want me to pour hundreds of thousands of

dollars...

...into an excuse for you to be around booze and

women?

No. No. Did you read the proposal? It shows a much

bigger picture.

I came down here because I saw the effort you made.

You wanna impress me with your commitment?

Try getting a few A's in school or maybe a part-time

job.

-Bye. BART: Hey.

Let's go get some lunch.

GOSSIP GIRL: Looks like the pot calling the kettle

black... ...has young Bass boiling over.

And if we know Chuck, he's not one to let things lie.

Someone pour that man a drink.

You need to look elegant for the Archibald dinner

tomorrow.

-So, what do you think? -Yes.

It would be very nice if I was sailing up on the

Mayflower.

Anne Archibald was wearing...

...her amazing Cornelius Vanderbilt diamond ring the

other night.

Was going on and on...

...about how it would end up on your finger someday.

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Season 1

Wait. Nate spoke to his mother about our future?

He actually asked for the family ring?

GOSSIP GIRL: Looks like cold, hard cash... ...can get

you the cold, hard truth.

Didn't anyone tell you, N? Be careful what you fish for.

I can't believe we got the apartment to ourselves.

You got downtown fast.

Well, with an opportunity like this, one needs to take

advantage. Mm.

-How long until your dad will be back? -Anywhere from

an hour to 20 minutes.

Well, 20 minutes is plenty.

It's kind of bright in here, don't you think?

Maybe get some blinds or a clapper.

Mm. How about next time?

VANESSA: Hey, Dan. Hungry?

-Hello. -Hi.

Hi. Vanessa, right?

-Good to see you. Heh. -Good to see you.

And good to see you, seeing us seeing you.

Excuse me.

-You really need to start using that door. -Which you're

showing me to.

-Practice makes perfect. -Leaving. Out the door.

And we appreciate it.

DAN: Sorry.

So do you think we should talk about it?

Oh-- You mean about Vanessa?

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Season 1

No, she's like family. It feels comfortable.

So therefore, she often shows up without calling.

No, I mean, about what almost maybe might have just

happened.

Oh, you mean if Vanessa hadn't entered and we--?

Or we can not talk about it.

RUFUS: Dan, we're home.

We got breakfast.

Hungry?

GOSSIP GIRL: Spotted: Bass, drunk off his ass.

At the Palace bar, drinking away his woes and his

investment capital.

Nathaniel, your position in my esteem has been

replaced by your voicemail.

So Bart didn't go for Victrola...

...but truth is I bought the house out already for tonight.

And it's not a party without my people. Or any people.

I'll see you there.

Long night?

Alfonso made me an omelet.

I may have washed it down with a bellini or two.

Father didn't go for your business proposal?

Come on.

-Let me help you. -He was born poor, I was born

loaded.

But if the only way to impress him is if I started with

nothing...

...then why doesn't he just take it all away?

Because he loves you.

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Season 1

No good parent likes to see his child go without.

I had the idea. I did the work.

He tells me I can't be committed and he's the one

screwing 25-year-olds...

...when he's supposedly committed to you.

We're newly committed. As recent as last week.

I wonder why was he pawing some Asian chick in his

limo yesterday.

How could I be surprised, really?

Excuse me.

I'm on my way.

-I'm late for my blowout at Arden's. -Mom, please.

The drugs were Dad's.

I mean, I guess he thought it'd be easier on everyone if

I took the hit.

But they were his.

-I don't understand. -No.

He promised me he'd flush the coke, and I caught him

buying more.

-The lengths you will go to to get out-- -Mom, he has

a problem.

I need your help. Please.

You look down at the floor every time someone tries to

tell you the truth.

Just look at me. Mom.

I saw Dad buying drugs yesterday.

He's been under a lot of pressure.

-And if you hadn't been so difficult lately-- -What?

Your latest rebellions have been very hard on your

father, Nate.

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Season 1

All this business with Dartmouth, your issues with Blair-

-

-Mom, Dad needs your help. -Not another word of

this.

We have a celebratory dinner to get to.

Please wear a tie.

See, you curl your fingers into a fist...

...and with several thrusts of force, you knock on the

door.

Hey, I didn't use the fire escape. Baby steps.

And what are you doing watching porn?

It's not porn, it's art cinema.

From what I saw earlier, you don't need to be doing

research.

I can't talk about this with you.

I'm curious, though. About the change in your attitude.

Because, may I remind you that in your pale, romantic,

tortured days...

...you'd wax on, and I quote, that sex is meaningful,

like art.

And you don't rush art.

That was in 2005.

I was more idealistic then. I was much younger.

And there wasn't an actual girl who wanted to have sex

with me.

You're going to lose your virginity.

-Ooh. Can you... -My friend Dan.

...please not turn my sex life into a country song?

It's okay. I'm sure Serena knows what to do.

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Season 1

What with her vast experiences with boarding school

professors...

...Pamplonian bullfighters, best friends' boyfriends....

That's enough now. You can go, please.

But if it were me with you...

...I'd want you to hide Cedric...

...maybe get some candles and replace the football

sheets.

-But take it or leave it. -Thanks.

Thanks for helping me with the bracelet. I didn't know it

could cost that much.

Oh, it was my pleasure. Oh, wait, no, it wasn't.

Game recognizes game, Little J. But you have to show

more respect.

This is the last time I help you. Next time you cross me,
I won't be as forgiving.

-Don't worry. There won't be a next time. -Good.

I wanna tell you something. Something nobody knows,

not even Serena.

-You can keep a secret, right? -Of course.

Nate is planning on giving me his family diamond.

It's the most incredible ring you've ever seen.

A ring as in engagement ring?

I remember the first time I ever saw him.

Maybe we were just little kids, but I knew. He's the one
I wanna marry.

Now it seems like he feels the same way too.

Why are you not happy for me?

I'm sorry. It's just been a really weird week.

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Season 1

There's this stuff with my parents and my family, so

maybe I should just go.

No, maybe you should look at me in the eye and tell me

what you're hiding.

-You jealous? -Of you and Nate?

-Do you like him? -Oh, no.

You think because you talked to him once in the hall

that you might have a shot?

-Blair, it's nothing like that. -Then tell me, what is it

like?

-I don't wanna hurt you. -How could you hurt me?

Yesterday wasn't the first time I talked to Nate.

At the ball, he told me he wasn't over Serena.

-Why would he tell you that? -Because I was wearing

her mask.

And he thought I was her.

-He kissed me. -That's enough.

-Blair, I didn't want you to find out-- -You're

dismissed, Jenny. For good.

CAPTAIN: Eleanor, who is this goddess I see--?

ELEANOR: Oh, please, Howard. CAPTAIN: Mwah.

ELEANOR: Hello, handsome. NATE: Hi, Ms. Waldorf.

CAPTAIN: That's amazing. ELEANOR: Howard.

Thank you.

Hey. You look beautiful tonight.

Anything on your mind?

No.

Is there anything you wanna say?

No.

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-The leg wrap, it's interesting. -Sexy, right? And it

increases stability.

Sure, yeah. I can see that.

-The hair grab, does that really work? -Oh, yeah, every
time.

Okay, so leg wrap to hair grab.

Do--? Hold on a second. Do I have to keep my shirt

open like that?

Well, it never hurts.

Nice.

I'm doomed.

RUFUS: Sensuous massage. Something we should talk

about?

No. You know, I have a lot of tension. Stress in

between my shoulder blades.

So....

I'm headed to the gallery to test-run a 24-hour

projection installation.

Vanessa and Jenny are over there. Do you wanna

come?

Um-- Twenty-four hours is a very long time to be

working straight.

So I think I might just chill here.

Alone? On a Saturday night?

With your new girlfriend?

-Son? -Dad, we've had the talk already.

-Do you need a refresher? -Etched in my brain,

thanks.

Well, just be safe.

Don't do anything you're not ready to do, or she's not.

Oh, and lose the football sheets. And Cedric.

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Well, you look pretty good for a dead messenger.

-I thought I was doing the right thing. -You did.

Now Blair knows the truth and she and Nate can talk
about it.

Honest communication is what every good relationship

is based on.

[CHUCKLES] At least, that's what I hear.

I think how I'd feel, you know, if I loved someone and

they betrayed me.

How would you get things back to the way they were?

-Are we still talking about Blair here? -Yeah, of course.

-What else can we be talking about? -I don't know.

Your parents?

Look, maybe you don't go back. Maybe you go

forward.

Get two people in a room willing to be honest.

Might get ugly, but eventually, the dust has to settle.

And then you can see if there's hope.

CAPTAIN: We've celebrated the partnership... ...but I

don't think we've given Eleanor her due.

-This lady is fantastic. -Oh, well, thank you, Howard.

More cheese? Have you tried the Humboldt Fog? It's

quite good.

-Eleanor's right. Enough business talk. CAPTAIN: Right.

Let's focus on our families' other joint venture, the

union of our children.

Every time I look at Anne's finger and see Blair's future

engagement ring...

...I can hardly contain my joy.

-Blair, why don't you try it on? -No, thank you, it's all
right.

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-Yes, I'd like to see it. -Anne, give it to Blair.

-She doesn't want to. -Just let it alone.

Just give it to the girl, Anne.

CAPTAIN: Eleanor, do we have another bottle?

If there was ever an occasion for a toast, this is it.

They're gonna make such a beautiful couple.

Now, come on, slide that thing on. Heh-heh-heh.

-Heh. CAPTAIN: That's what I'm talking about.

-That's very pretty. CAPTAIN: Looks magnificent.

-Thank you. CAPTAIN: Everybody, yeah?

ELEANOR: It's perfect on her. CAPTAIN: How about

that toast?

Everybody, bottoms up.

Dad, why don't we go smoke those cigars we got, huh?

-Yeah? -Mm. Good idea. Excuse us.

Certainly.

-This seat taken? -Father.

Wow. The light of day doesn't do this place any justice.

I told him to check it out when the joint was in full

swing.

-Chuck, this is Pauletta Cho. -Chuck Bass. Pleasure.

All mine.

Pauletta interviewed me for that recent piece in The

Observer.

Roped me into lunch yesterday to pitch me on helping

her with a career change.

PAULETTA: What can I say? I'm tired of reporting on

titans, wanna be one myself.

Right, well, who better to help than my father.

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As a test, I gave her your proposal that I was given to

take a look at.

PAULETTA: The math was fine, but what interested

me...

...was the wish-fulfillment quality to the report.

So perhaps some old-school thinking and fatherly bias

clouded my judgment.

What do you say?

I love the idea of being a patron of burgeoning talent.

-Shall we take a full tour? -Yeah.

You know, I've been trying to get ahold of Lily, but I

don't seem able to.

Dad. Ahem.

There's something I have to tell you.

NATE: You have a problem. -I don't.

You're tweaked and embarrassing. You don't have a

problem?

Don't be so dramatic.

No, you've reminded me every day how important this

business deal is to you.

You've been selling me out trying to make it happen...

...pushing me towards Dartmouth, towards Blair.

-You don't understand. -You're totally sabotaging it

tonight.

Who the hell are you to tell me? I'm the adult, you're
the kid.

I know.

-I'm going back inside. -Dad, don't.

Nate, let go of me.

COP 1: What's going on here? -Nothing, he's my son.

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-Is everything all right? CAPTAIN: I said everything's

fine.

COP 1: I'm not asking you. -I'm sorry, Dad. You need
help.

Check his pockets while you're at it.

All right, sir, just relax.

My father went home sick.

GOSSIP GIRL: Spotted on 5th Avenue: A father and son

showdown.

Too bad not all the witnesses can be bought off.

She's not taking my calls.

-I can't believe you did this. -I made a mistake.

-This isn't high school, Chuck. -She'll take you back.

I'm not so certain about that.

If she doesn't, I'm not sure that's my fault.

There's a reason she was so quick to believe me.

There's a fire-eater in the ladies' lounge.

You two should set a meeting. See if this place can

really be something.

I'm gonna try and find Lily and fix this.

What are you doing?

Going to Victrola. I promised Chuck. It's important to

him.

I saw your father get arrested.

Why didn't you come to me? I would have listened.

I've tried, Blair. But every time I try, something's got

your attention.

-A dinner party, you know, a masked ball. -Yeah. Let's

talk about that masked ball.

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While I was waiting for you to find me so that we could

finally be together...

...you were confessing your feelings and kissing

Serena.

I thought I was doing everything right.

It's not your fault.

Do you love me?

You should deal with your father.

He needs you.

You know what?

I don't.

DAN: Okay. I'm ready.

Come here.

I know it may not compare to a suite at the Ritz in Paris

or a chalet in Aspen...

...and it might be a fire hazard but....

It's perfect.

-Where's Nate? -I think we just broke up.

-What? -I don't wanna talk about it.

I just want to escape. That's what this place is for,

right?

You don't wanna talk about what happened--

Relief.

I feel relief.

WOMAN: Work it, work it. MAN: Come on, let it go.

You know, I got moves.

Really?

-Then why don't you get up there? -No.

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-I'm just saying, I have moves. -Come on.

-You're 10 times hotter than those girls. -I know what

you're doing, Bass.

-You really don't think I'll go up there. -I know you

won't do it.

Guard my drink.

-Who's that girl? -I have no idea.

You go, baby vamp.

GOSSIP GIRL: As you might have guessed, Upper East

Siders...

...prohibition never stood a chance against exhibition.

It's human nature to be free.

And no matter how long you try to be good, you can't

keep a bad girl down.

Well, this is a new strain of obsessive-compulsive.

The art piece projects up to the ceiling.

Still doing anything to get a girl on her back, huh?

-What are you doing here, Lil? -Oh, uh--

Let me ask you that question another way.

Did you break up with Bart again?

Well, what did I do to deserve such a thorny welcome?

Sorry, I'm not in the mood to play games.

I don't know what's happened with my marriage...

...and you showing up here randomly and

often... ...doesn't make figuring that out any easier.

I'm sorry I bothered you. Really.

Lil, wait.

You know, if you wanna stay and see the installation...

...I could really use the company.

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I don't wanna be in your way.

Since when, Van der Woodsen?

Heh. I've been meaning to get that fixed.

I'm really happy to be here with you right now.

Wait.

-What, did I do something wrong? -No.

-I knew the hair thing was too much. -No.

No, it's just.... Um....

"Um." "Um" is never good. What?

I'm scared. Heh.

-Of me? -No.

Well, yes, but--

No, it's just I've never--

You've never--? You're not--?

-No. -Are you?

No, I wish--

It's just nobody's ever looked at me the way you just

did.

In fact, I don't think they looked at me at all.

You think I'm crazy, don't you?

No. No, I don't.

Are you mad?

Come here.

Thank you.

-Mom, hey. What's going on? -What do you think?

I'm headed to the police station. The lawyers will meet

me there.

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Along with someone from the district attorney's office.

Wait, what? Why can't we just pay his bail?

His bail is set at a million dollars.

What are you talking about? It wasn't that much coke.

It seems your father is facing some other charges.

For what?

Embezzlement and fraud.

I guess they've been building their case for a while.

Well, are you coming?

Mom.

It's time for you to come home.

Thanks for the lift home.

You were amazing up there.

You sure?

End

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08. 17개의 촛불

Main Actor: Blake Lively, Leighton Meester, Penn Badgley, Chace Crawford, Edward Westwick,
Kaylee Defer, Kelly Rutherford, Matthew Settle

Transcribed by: Justin

Provided by: https://blog.naver.com/uzupis

WOMAN: Where has she been?

GOSSIP GIRL: And who am I? That's one secret I'll

never tell.

You know you love me. XOXO...

...Gossip Girl.

GOSSIP GIRL: According to the Catholic Church...

...mortal sin can only be absolved through the sacred

act of confession.

But it looks like a certain Wasp princess has recently

found herself...

...desperately in need of a little unburdening.

And who is the man upstairs to discriminate?

BLAIR: Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.

It's been a while since my last confession.

What troubles you, my child?

After being broken up with my boyfriend for exactly 20

minutes...

...I succumbed to inebriation, performed at a

speakeasy...

...and surrendered my virtue to a self-absorbed ass.

The good news is that he's a pig who'll act like it never
happened. Thank God.

PRIEST: Ahem. -Sorry.

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Season 1

-Truthfully, I'm not even Catholic. -You don't say.

But losing my virginity to Chuck Bass?

None of my friends will ever understand.

I'm ready for my punishment.

Whatever you and God think is fair.

Flogging, fasting...

...putting that thing with the teeth around my thigh like

Silas?

How about some food for thought instead?

Don't drink, keep your clothes on...

...try avoiding those who might cause you to stray.

Oh, I plan to.

Thank you, Father. It was very good advice.

You don't grant birthday wishes, do you?

PRIEST: I'm a priest, not a genie.

Well, the next time you talk to him...

...would you ask him to send my boyfriend back to me?

-Mm. I gotta say-- -No need to say anything.

God, I hate people in love.

VANESSA: Wow. [CHUCKLES] Awkward.

-Vanessa? -Serena.

-Dan. -No, no, no. Vanessa's here.

WAITRESS: Ah. Lovebirds ready to order? -I'll take

them.

Hi.

Hi. So you work here now?

I did mention that, but you've been distracted.

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Season 1

-Vanessa, hi. Nice to see you. -This time, you're

seeing less of me.

Sorry about that...

-...walking in when you were, you know. -Yep.

So you guys are up early? What did you do last night?

Oh, my God, I totally didn't mean to pry.

-You're not. -Why would you think that?

-No reason. -No reason.

-Did you tell her? -No, what's to tell?

I know nothing.

But if you did the thing I know nothing about, then I

would totally support that.

Thanks, Vanessa. Good to know, in the event that

should happen.

Oh, it didn't happen?

-I don't know what we're talking about. -I know I'm

lost.

And I should get lost.

It's the first day. I have a lot of tables.

DAN: Clearly.

So Vanessa works here now.

Yeah, we should make this our regular spot.

Well, this is the last place I'd expect to find you.

Go away, Chuck.

I've been given orders practically from God himself to

avoid you.

Consider avoiding me over breakfast?

Sorry, but as is tradition on the day before my

birthday...

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Season 1

...I'm heading to the jewelers to put some pieces on

hold--

Nate? I don't think he'll be singing "Happy Birthday" this

year.

No one knows that Nate and I broke up. It's gonna stay
that way so I can fix this.

I don't think he'd still be your friend if he knew.

If he knew how much I enjoyed the removal of a certain

chastity belt...

...in the back of this very limo?

From this moment on, the events of last night... ...will

never be mentioned again, is that clear?

Not as clear as the memory of you purring in my ear...

...which I have been replaying over and over.

Well, erase the tape, because as far as I'm concerned,

it never happened.

-I'll see you at your party tonight. -You're uninvited.

Never stopped me before.

GOSSIP GIRL: Speak of the devil and he doth appear...

...wearing his trademark scarf.

Careful, B.

Hell hath no fury like a Chuck Bass scorned.

-Hey, Dad. -Hi, honey.

How was Hudson? Your mother must have been kind of

surprised to see you.

Yeah, she was.

-Hi, Rufus. -Alison.

What are you doing here?

Well, I asked her to come.

You know, I thought you guys could talk.

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Season 1

Or not.

I know it wasn't my place...

-...to ask Mom to come back-- -Jenny--

It's your life, I get that, but it's my life too.

I felt that nothing's gonna change if someone doesn't-

-

Jenny.

Stop. Breathe.

I'm not angry.

-You're not? -Not at you.

Well, you can't get un-angry at mom if she's in Hudson

and you're here, Dad.

I mean, nothing's ever gonna change if you're not in

the same room.

Can't you just give it a chance?

Not on an empty stomach.

Come. I'll make us breakfast.

Who wants waffles?

You do still like waffles, right, Rufus?

RUFUS: You know me, Al.

I'm a loyal guy. Once I commit to something, I stick

with it.

I'll get the syrup.

Would you look at this?

-I just can't believe this. -Hey, Mom.

-I just got back from the jewelers and-- -Have you

seen this?

Since when does drunk and disorderly get this much

attention?

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Season 1

Since never. The Captain is being charged with

embezzlement and fraud.

This is an absolute disaster.

Must be awful for them.

I meant for me.

The Captain is supposed to represent me.

The contracts are about to be signed.

What about my IPO, huh? What is gonna happen to my

Bendel's deal?

-He looks so helpless. -I have to call my attorney.

I have to put an end to this deal before it goes any

further.

I have to talk to Nate.

I don't know why everybody's making such a big deal

out of this.

It's just a misunderstanding. It will be cleared up in

time.

Yes, it will, at your trial. This is real, Howard.

The only reason you're not behind bars is because your

wife could afford bail.

I would have paid 10 times that amount.

We'll do everything to make sure that doesn't happen.

This is not something to be cavalier about.

It's clearly a setup. Someone's got an agenda.

-Would you shut up and listen to him? -Nate.

What exactly do we need to do here?

Remain calm and give them nothing but a united front

as we fight this.

Well, what about some sort of a--? Some sort of plea?

A plea? You think I'm guilty?

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Season 1

Dad, it's just a question.

-How would that work exactly? -It wouldn't.

Nate, I'm sure you're very tired, and this is a

conversation for adults.

Why don't you go get some rest, sweetheart?

Hey, Dad, Jenny.

And-- And Mom.

Hi, honey.

Well, look at this. The whole family's together.

Eating waffles.

-Want one? -You bet.

Just one question:

Am I the only one who thinks this is extremely weird?

I mean, given everything.

Dan, just forget about it.

-If Dad can let it go, so can you. -What do you mean
let it go?

-You know, the guy in Hudson. -You told her?

-No, I didn't tell her. Rufus? -I would never.

-I overheard Dan and Dad talking. -He heard us

arguing on the phone.

If you wanna keep secrets, maybe we should move to a

place with more walls.

It's always good to give him a while.

Yeah. No, I-- I knew that.

I can't believe he told her you guys were gonna do it.

-Well, I told you. -That's different, I'm a girl.

-Yeah, well, so is she. -Exactly my point.

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Even if she wasn't, when you get a boyfriend...

...you become the best friend and the best friend

becomes the second.

That's just how it has to be if it's ever gonna work.

Hey, you still haven't told me how Nate's doing.

It's all over the news.

When I talked to him this morning, I told him to focus

on his family today.

But he's still coming to your party, right?

Here.

I told him not to worry about it.

I mean, only if he's up to it.

You're such a good girlfriend, B.

Really.

Hey, I'll just pick you up and we can go together.

But I really hope Nate can make it.

ANNE [MUFFLED]: Here you are.

I've been looking everywhere for you. I was up in your

room...

...calling your name to come and eat.

Nate, take your earphones out?

Take your earphones out.

Nathaniel, I've been calling you for 20 minutes.

I'm sorry. What is it?

Blair's birthday party is tonight, isn't it?

Yeah.

I was thinking maybe you should give her something

special.

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Season 1

I'm sure she's picked out something at the jewelry store

and put it on hold. Heh.

Something more special than that.

Mom, that's a family heirloom.

I'm not giving it to Blair.

It's an engagement ring.

I'm not asking you to propose.

But it's important that Blair knows how much you value
her loyalty.

Her loyalty or her mother's?

Eleanor's lawyers may have called. What difference

does it make?

One day we'll all be family and they won't have a

choice.

Blair and I broke up last night.

Well, then get back together.

I don't think so.

May I remind you it was your rash actions that got us

into this predicament.

We're in this predicament because Dad has a drug

problem.

-I was trying to help him. -Then help him.

Your father's acting the way that he is because he's

scared.

He needs you so much right now, more than he ever

has.

We all do.

GOSSIP GIRL: Whoever thought monarchy was

dead... ...didn't realize it just changed zip codes.

So, what will it be, Nate?

Blair Waldorf's hand or your father's head?

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Hi. Are you okay?

I've been texting you all day.

Yeah, I'm fine. Thanks.

I've just been a little busy.

I just wanted to check on you. See if you need

anything.

Yeah, I kind of do.

Blair, do you think we've been a little hasty with the

whole breakup?

I don't know, Nate.

It was a pretty difficult decision.

Yeah, look, I totally understand. I'm sorry.

I-- I shouldn't have brought it up.

But we do have a lot of history together.

It was in the heat of the moment.

But you'd have to be willing to really work for it.

Yeah, yeah, of course.

Listen, we'll take it slow and see how it goes.

And I've got a birthday present for you.

It's something special.

I can't wait to open it at my party. I'll see you there.

Hi, this is Blair Waldorf.

I was wondering if any of the pieces that I put on hold

were picked up today.

The diamond necklace, really?

[CHUCKLES] Okay. Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you.

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Season 1

Hey.

Can we talk?

Well, that depends. Are you back for good?

I don't know.

Your father and I haven't had a chance to talk.

Well, do you want to come back...

...or do you wanna live in Hudson with neighbor guy?

Okay, look, Dan, I understand that you're mad, all

right?

-And I'm not gonna defend what I did-- -No, you

don't get it, do you?

You think I'm only mad about the cheating?

Okay, what else?

Maybe that you promised you'd be home by the end of

summer and you weren't.

Or maybe the fact that you left at all.

I asked you if you were okay with me going away...

...and I'd hoped if there was a problem you would say

something.

Like what?

Your daughter's a freshman at a school populated by

mean girls and date rapists...

...I think she needs her mom?

Or maybe my father is madly in love with you...

...and will probably never get over this?

Why should I have to tell you this?

RUFUS: Where are you going? -Out. I'll call later.

Well, that went well.

I'm going out also. There's something I need to do.

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Season 1

-Need help? -Can I help you?

JENNY: No, I'm good. Thanks.

Come on, man. I can hear you breathing on the other

side of the door.

Is she anybody you can get rid of?

I really need to talk to you, man, please.

Nathaniel.

-Where's the girl? -In my dreams, I was trying to get

sleep.

-What's on your mind? -It's my mom.

Sounds Freudian.

-She wants me to give Blair her ring. -What?

You guys broke up.

Yeah, I know.

I mean-- Wait, how do you know?

Predictably, your ex ran the old grill-the-best-friend

play.

Tried to find out where your head was at.

So where--? Where is your head?

Phew. Spinning. My mom wants me to get back with

Blair...

...so Eleanor doesn't pull out of their business deal.

It's all because of my dad's whole trial thing, you know.

Yeah, I'm sorry about all that.

But look, if you're done with Blair, be done.

Don't cave to your parents' wishes if they're not your

desires.

Excuse me, where's my boy?

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Season 1

Seal the deal, tap that ass, money marries bigger

money.

I care about three things, Nathaniel:

Money, the pleasures money brings me and you.

I'm just trying to have your back here.

Your parents controlled you your whole life. If it doesn't

end now, when will it?

-Hey. -Hi, Serena, Blair.

BOTH: Happy birthday.

Oh, my God. Kati, your brother's place is fabulous.

-Yeah, I know, right? -I know, it's incredible.

Come on, let's check it out.

BLAIR: Thank you.

-Hey, so where's Nate? -Um....

I'm sure he'll be here soon.

What about Dan?

He said he's coming, but I haven't talked to him since

this morning.

Well, you better check in on him.

Make sure the best friend hasn't whisked him away to

do friendly activity.

-Shut up. -Ha-ha-ha.

Oh, there's Chuck. I bet he knows where Nate is.

Nate probably snuck in while we were dancing.

SERENA: Chuck.

Well, thanks for listening to me complain about my

family.

Look, I know it's hard right now but your family's one of
the good ones.

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Your parents love each other.

They'll figure it out.

And in the meantime, you've got me.

DAN: Um....

Actually, I was gonna go meet up with Serena.

Oh, sure. Have fun.

I will.

What are we doing?

I thought you said we weren't doing anything.

I like Serena and I like you.

And she likes me and you like me.

So how can you not like each other? It's mathematically

impossible.

Who said I didn't? I just don't know her.

You're making a real effort to change that.

I mean, why spend five minutes trying to be nice to

Serena...

...when I can spend day after day forced to choose

between the two of you?

Okay, fine. Wanna see me get my nice on?

Let's do it tonight.

Just you, me and Serena.

Tonight-- Tonight is Blair Waldorf's birthday party.

I think we might wanna start by dipping a toe...

...rather than diving off of a cliff head first into the

rocks with the sharks.

Why? We all know how to swim.

Come on. You wanna do this?

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Season 1

Let's do it.

You ready for your present? Ow!

If you wanted to play rough, all you had to do was ask.

GIRL: Hey, Blair. -Hi.

Hello there. Happy birthday to me.

You nauseate me.

All this talk about how you have to be with Nate or the
world will end.

Face it, it's over.

You sound like a jealous boyfriend.

Yeah, right. You wish.

No, you wish.

Please. You forget who you're talking to.

So do you.

Do you like me?

Define like.

You've got to be kidding. I do not believe this.

How do you think I feel?

I haven't slept, I feel sick...

...like there's something in my stomach fluttering.

Butterflies?

Oh, no, no, no. This is not happening.

Believe me, no one is more surprised or ashamed than

I am.

Chuck, you know that I adore all of God's creatures...

...and the metaphors they inspire...

...but those butterflies have got to be murdered.

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Fine.

-It wasn't that great, anyway. -Thanks.

Jenny.

-Oh, hi, Nate. -Hey.

I told Blair and I shouldn't have. I'm sorry.

Oh, about what happened at the ball, it's not your fault.

So how have things been between you guys?

Strange.

But again, not your fault.

So you gonna go inside?

I was planning on it.

But now that I'm here, I'm not so sure.

Yeah, me neither.

Blair invited me before our fight...

...and I was gonna run in and give her this card...

-...which says "I'm sorry," like, 30 times. -Ha-ha-ha.

Maybe you could deliver it for me, though?

Do you wanna go take a walk or something?

With you?

What would Blair think?

Well, Blair's up there.

Unless, of course, you wanna go. It's up to you.

A walk sounds good.

Thank you.

GIRL 1: Hey, you. GIRL 2: Ha-ha-ha.

Dan, you're here.

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Season 1

And--

And you brought Vanessa.

Hey, good to see you.

Um.... Kati and Is, you know Dan.

Blair, this is Dan's friend, Vanessa.

Wow. You didn't mention they were so nice.

Now I get it.

Oh, sweetie, you did not tell me she looked like that.

This is such a problem.

Rufus, I'm sorry.

I know that you're upset.

You're getting that, huh?

Can you please talk to me, please?

I only have one question and I'm sure I don't wanna

hear the answer.

It happened one time and I wish it hadn't and it's over.

Then why did our daughter have to go to Hudson and

drag you back here?

Because when we spoke on the phone... ...I didn't get

the impression you wanted to see me.

-I thought I should give you some space. -This family

has had way too much space.

You never should have left.

Can we not go through this thing again? Please, you

know that I wasn't happy.

-Yeah, you happy now? -In some ways, I am.

-I know you don't wanna hear that. -Don't act like you
care what I want.

Rufus, I was there for you...

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...when you were all about your music...

...when you were on the road for months at a time...

...and everything that went with that.

My whole adult life has been about you.

[VOICE BREAKING] And now I'm the one that's

screwed up.

I guess I was a late bloomer...

...and I just need you to care enough about me to try.

Alison.

I care.

I care.

Stalk me much?

What are you still doing up here all alone?

I don't know where Nate is and he always calls me at

midnight on my birthday.

Well, I wouldn't count on it tonight.

Doesn't it strike you as a coincidence, the timing of

everything?

-What do you mean? -Well...

...Nate suddenly decides he wants to get back

together...

...just moments after your mother puts the brakes on

her deal with The Captain.

So you're saying that Nate is only pretending to like

me...

...and that he's actually using me to get to my mother.

He wouldn't do that.

Yes, he would.

If it was to help his family, you know he would.

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Nate loves me.

Whatever he's doing, wherever he is, he will call at

midnight, you'll see.

Care to make a wager?

If he calls, I'll leave you alone forever.

If he doesn't, you spend the night with me.

I will not.

I thought you were sure.

You're gonna lose.

He's never missed my birthday.

GOSSIP GIRL: Careful, B.

There's no safe wager when you bet on a Bass.

You just might lose your shirt and your pants.

So you brought Vanessa as your date to Blair's party?

No, you're my date. I thought it'd be a good

opportunity for all of us to hang out.

Oh, yeah, because it was so fun and not awkward at

breakfast this morning.

Fine, you're right. I thought this would be a bad

opportunity for us to hang out.

But I kind of suggested to Vanessa she wasn't making

an effort to know you...

...so she decided to start tonight.

But if it's weird, I can go talk to her. Oh, no, no, no,
don't do that.

Look, tell me something Vanessa likes, besides you...

...and I will make an effort to bond.

-I promise. -Oh, thank you.

So, what now?

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SERENA: Ever play "Guitar Hero"?

VANESSA: Thank you, thank you. -She owned you,

Serena.

Yeah, you went down almost as hard as Britney at the

VMAs.

Okay, you know, you're good, Vanessa, I'll admit it...

...but I have been holding back until now.

Here's a little birdie that's about to be freed.

MAN: Yeah, Serena!

That's my girl. That's it, right there.

Thank you, thank you. Who got owned now?

Not bad, but Skynyrd is meat and potatoes and I'm

bringing dessert.

So, what do you say to a slice of cherry pie?

No pie. I say no, I beg you.

Come on, nothing like a little '80s hair metal to put a

smile on your face...

...after the day you've had.

The day you've had? What kind of a day have you had?

You didn't tell her?

No. No, not yet, not yet.

It was kind of an odd day at the Humphrey lofts.

Actually, Jenny brought my mom home.

Your mom's back?

-Yeah. -Will you excuse me?

I can't believe you didn't tell me your mom came home.

I'm sorry, really.

-What, you didn't think it was important? -No, no, of

course it is.

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Why bother? You already told Vanessa.

I tell Vanessa everything, all right? I have since I was 6.

Well, you're not 6 anymore, Dan.

I just--

I was just hoping that I would be the person you'd

wanna tell these things to.

I want you to be that person too.

Really, I do.

This whole girlfriend thing is very new to me, you

know?

I just....

I don't know all the rules yet.

Blair says in a relationship, the best friend--

Serena, are we really taking relationship advice from

Blair?

Good point.

Look, I just don't wanna have to compete with

Vanessa.

You know, with "Guitar Hero," okay...

...I'm way more awesome if you didn't happen to

notice.

But not with you.

That's fair.

All right, so tomorrow, you and I will go somewhere

together, just the two of us...

...and we'll talk about my family in excruciating detail...

...until you are so bored, you're begging for Vanessa to

take over.

-How's that sound? -Perfect.

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-Come on. It's almost midnight. -What happens at

midnight?

I heard about your dad.

I'm sorry.

Well, if it makes you feel any better, my family's not

doing that great either.

I didn't wanna come to Blair's party...

...as much as I wanted to get out of my house.

Yeah, I know the feeling.

Blair's birthday present.

Your mother's ring.

Blair told me about it.

Wow, it's beautiful.

I'm supposed to give it to Blair tonight.

I'm guessing that wasn't your idea.

Blair and I broke up.

And I know it was the right thing to do.

We just shouldn't be together right now, you know?

-Sounds like you're pretty sure of that. -I am.

As much as I wanna do the right thing and help out my

parents, it's just-- It's not fair.

I mean, to me or to Blair.

I just think that if I do this now... ...when does it ever

stop?

It would only stop when you stop it.

Twelve-oh-one.

I'm sorry.

No, you're smarmy. There's a difference.

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If you're coming to collect, you can forget it.

Turn around.

You get grosser by the second.

You get older. Look.

GIRLS: Happy birthday!

Ha-ha! Come on, blow out your candles.

Make a wish, Blair.

Make a wish.

[VOICE BREAKING] It already didn't come true.

GOSSIP GIRL: Happy birthday to who?

Forget cake and ice cream, I'm saving room for just
desserts.

Looks like Chuck's wish might come true.

Hey.

So I don't know how it was possible...

...given how the day started, but I actually had kind of a

good night.

-Your parents won't be mad you're late? -No, they

think I'm with a friend.

Oh. Well, they think right.

I had fun. Heh-heh.

Me too.

You have a good night.

GOSSIP GIRL: Spotted...

...Nate Archibald depositing a mystery girl in a taxi after

midnight.

All we know about her for sure...

...she's not Blair Waldorf.

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Season 1

Oh, my God.

Maybe she's wrong. It wouldn't be the first time.

GIRL: I can't believe Gossip Girl would do....

SERENA: Blair.

Hey, I'm so sorry. I never thought that this would

happen.

-I hope the slut gave him herpes. -A cheater deserves

herpes.

He isn't cheating.

We broke up, okay?

He was gonna get back together with me, but only so

my mom would help his dad.

You satisfied?

Blair.

Blair.

Blair, stop. You can talk to me.

[CRYING] We ended it.

I wanted to tell you, but that part of me thought that...

...if I didn't say it out loud that it wouldn't be true.

Shh. Shh.

It was my birthday wish, for us to get back together.

But now I think it's really over.

Oh, Blair. Shh.

Is it okay if I just wanna be alone for a second?

Nate, hey. What are you doing home so early?

It's after midnight. We just thought you'd be with Blair.

How did she like her gift?

I didn't make it to the party tonight.

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Well, her actual birthday is today.

Call her in the morning, take her to lunch.

It's a good plan. Really more special this way.

Dad, I know you think Blair will help save you, but I'm
not doing this.

-It's over. -Nate.

There's nothing I wouldn't do to protect our family...

...and I'm sure you feel the same.

I need your support here, son, and your trust.

Well, you better hope for your sake they don't call your
son to the stand.

God, I have missed your smile.

-I've missed everything. -Mm.

Please tell me that is someone coming to rob the

house.

Hey, Mom. Hey, Dad.

Hey, Jenny.

As you were.

Your friend gonna be okay?

I'm not sure.

She broke up with her boyfriend...

...and then they got back together and then I don't

know what just happened.

Oh. She's lucky to have you.

Being a good friend is--

Challenging at times.

Hey, if I've been acting however I've been acting...

...it's because I'm protective of Dan.

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Season 1

And I'm protective of our relationship.

I've never actually had one before.

You guys just have everything in common and I'm just

getting to know him.

So, you know, it can be a little intimidating.

Talk about intimidating?

You just admitted that you find me intimidating.

So how cool does that make you?

I think you forgot to mention my superior "Guitar Hero"

skills.

No, I didn't forget that.

At the next party, I'm asking for a rematch. You were

about to get smoked.

Oh, really? I think the only thing getting smoked...

...is your pale imitation of a guitar player.

Hey, I am a golden god.

Oh-ho. Really? Are you now?

Hey, am I interrupting anything?

Actually, you are.

I'll give you guys a moment.

Might that have been bonding that I walked in on?

-A little bit. -Yeah?

-What were you talking about? -Nothing you need to

know about.

So you have secrets now. I see.

If you wanna get out of here, Vanessa can only fit two
on her Vespa. I can walk.

Oh, well, you know I love me a Vespa...

...but I think I gotta stay here, be with Blair.

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Season 1

You're not the only one with a best friend.

Right.

I'm not in the mood, Chuck.

This is pretty much the worst birthday ever.

Maybe it can be salvaged.

What is that? Our sex tape?

It's the Erickson Beamon necklace.

No, I couldn't. Yes, you can.

Something this beautiful...

...deserves to be seen on someone worthy of its

beauty.

I really am sorry.

GOSSIP GIRL: Spotted, B turning a year older...

...but not necessarily wiser.

Guess Chuck's the gift that keeps on giving.

Blow out your candles, B.

This will be better in the dark.

XOXO, Gossip Girl.

End

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09. 블레어의 추수감사절

Main Actor: Blake Lively, Leighton Meester, Penn Badgley, Chace Crawford, Edward Westwick,
Kaylee Defer, Kelly Rutherford, Matthew Settle

Transcribed by: Justin

Provided by: https://blog.naver.com/uzupis

WOMAN: Where has she been?

GOSSIP GIRL: And who am I?

That's one secret I'll never tell.

You know you love me. XOXO...

...Gossip Girl.

As per Gossip Girl's Thanksgiving tradition...

...I'm trading my laptop for stovetop.

And for the next 16 hours, the only thing I'm dishing is
seconds.

When the cat's away, the mice will play.

Have fun, little rodents.

I mean, who gets wasted on Thanksgiving?

The holidays are lonely for people. I wanted to keep

them company.

Your mom is freaking out so my mom is freaking out.

What, which means you freak out?

Blair, just cut the cord. Go nuts.

-Come on, let's do shots. Come on! -I told Lily that

you were buying a pie.

-Oh, pie. -Where is your purse?

-Uh.... My purse. -Oh, great.

All right, you stay here, okay?

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Season 1

I'm gonna go look. Don't drink or hit on anything.

Pie's been secured.

Thanksgiving no longer needs to be canceled, all right?

Hey, Mom, you know, I need to go. I'm sorry, bye.

Oh, man.

MAN: Hey, what are you doing? -Hey, right of way.

-Pal. MAN: Screw you, buddy.

Hey, excuse me, do you need, like, a crossing guard or

a cab maybe?

Oh, pie.

More like roadkill now, but better it than you, right?

I'm Dan Humphrey.

-Hi. -Hi.

I don't know, we met last year. You might not

remember.

Yeah, you probably don't, but you should be more

careful.

-Keep your hands off of her. -Blair!

Trying to take advantage of her on the holidays. Come

on, let's go, Serena.

-Bye, Dave. -Bye.

Bye.

Bye, Serena.

-Hey. -And hello to you.

-Big national holiday, you excited? -Kind of am.

Might be the first Thanksgiving that I actually

remember.

-Yeah, I bet. -Huh?

-Nothing. You at Blair's? -Almost.

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Season 1

Her dad's gonna be home for the first time since he left
so she's excited.

Well, family reunions are all around, then.

We too have a full Humphrey household. Hopefully, it'll

stick.

Well, it seems like your mom's really trying.

Better Thanksgiving than never.

-Call me between every course? -Okay.

Bye.

Is it okay to cook with this much heavy cream?

Our arteries give us a free pass on Turkey Day.

It's a shame our family doesn't have more members.

-You think I bought too much? -Only by several tons.

But it's our first holiday back. I wanted to make sure it

was special.

Think they call that guilt.

Yeah, I guess they do.

But if it means more turkey sandwiches for all of us,

then so be it.

Yeah, see, Dan? We on this side of the kitchen choose

to be positive.

Yeah, Dan, what's it gonna be?

-You with us or against us? -Uh.... Fine, fine.

But only if I can take the cranberry sauce out of the

can. That is my specialty.

I have to find the recipe before Dad gets here.

Harold Waldorf famous pumpkin pie.

Well, it may have been Bobby Flay's... ...but didn't stop

my dad from taking credit for it.

It's gonna be perfect.

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Season 1

Look at you. Quite the chipper sous-chef.

Well, I'm in a good mood. It happens.

Sometimes I increase my Lexapro, sometimes my dad's

in town.

And sometimes, mostly, because things are good with

a boy.

You and Nate get back together?

Since Gossip Girl published pictures of him and some

skank?

So that's a no.

What's Chuck doing today?

Why are you asking me?

Well, you guys are friends.

And, Blair, look, you know you can tell me anything.

-I'd be the last person to judge anyone. -With good

reason.

Blair, I saw you with Chuck.

I don't know what I was thinking.

Sleeping with him once you could understand, but

twice?

-Wait, you slept with him? -Shh!

-Ugh! Blair. -What happened to no judging?

I'm not, but I thought you wanted to wait, to make

things special.

Oh, so Nate gets the free pass and I'm the slut?

Tell me you didn't sleep with Chuck for revenge.

Well, it wasn't because I like his natural musk.

And besides, nothing hurts more than sleeping with the

best friend, right, S?

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Season 1

-Way to prove a point. -Well, I learned from the

master.

Sleeping with Chuck? The student's become the

master.

Are you jealous? You didn't get to sleep with him first?

There had to be somebody left on the Upper East Side.

ELEANOR: Blair, darling, are you going to help me at

all?

Serena, do you know when your mother's arriving?

She's not.

We're not doing Thanksgiving here anymore.

-Why? -Because I uninvited them.

Happy holidays, Eleanor.

SERENA: I know it's my fault we're here, but let's not

get crazy.

LILY: What are you complaining about?

I'm just trying to provide my family with a home-cooked

meal.

You don't know how to cook.

Well, don't blame me. Talk to your sister.

She's the one that got us exiled from the Waldorfs'.

-I'm sorry. -Even if you cook...

-...we don't have an oven. -Preaching to the

converted, Eric.

Look, we'll just pick up a few things and try to make

do.

-Like Peking duck on Thanksgiving. LILY: Hmm. Not a

bad idea.

SERENA: No, Mom. -All the other shops are closed.

There's nothing wrong with having Chinese food on

Thanksgiving.

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Season 1

Jews have been doing it on Christmas since forever.

Look, a pumpkin. Isn't this...?

This is festive. Yes?

We're gonna eat a pumpkin?

Mom.

So you couldn't make it past the salad, huh?

I opened the cranberries. My work is done.

-How's Blair's? -I wouldn't know.

She gave me the boot.

What? She kicked you out of her house?

-What happened now? -Don't ask.

But the good news is, my mom is gonna slice us up a

pumpkin.

Oh, and there's a duck.

No, no, no, you can't eat duck and raw pumpkin on
Thanksgiving.

You know what?

I am guardian of Vanessa's van for the weekend...

...and we here at the Humphrey manor have an oddly

large kitchen table.

What are you suggesting?

These smell great.

Yes, so we can starve in a fragrant hotel room.

SERENA: We're not starving.

Look, I got us into this mess so I'm gonna get us out of

it.

-Elaborate, Serena. -Thanksgiving at the Humphreys.

Dan invited me, and Eric's friends with his sister and
his dad's really cool.

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Season 1

ERIC: Awesome, I'm leaving the pumpkin. -What do

you say, Mom?

Found it. Sous-chef, you're needed.

-Ready and awaiting orders. -I see we have extra help.

Yes, well, Serena's spending Thanksgiving with us this

year.

More the merrier. Happy to have you, my dear.

-Whoo! Yes. -The canapés were a huge success.

I saved one for you, Blair.

I'm not really hungry.

Well, what does that mean?

Well, I had like 15 of them this morning when Daddy

first made them.

Fifteen?

Serena. Sere--

Do you think that's wise?

My darling, she's fine.

She has been for two months.

What did the doctor say?

Don't drive us crazy.

-Okay? -Fine.

We are going to need to set another place at the table.

Laurel brought one of the models I'm working with.

-Yeah? Do I know her? What's her name? -His name is

Roman.

Ah. Roman.

Not this one, Harold.

We have to work together.

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Season 1

NATE: Hey, you.

ELEANOR: Happy Thanksgiving. -You too.

-You want one? -Sure.

-Good boy. -Nate the great.

-So what'd I miss? -Nothing.

-Witness the return of sober Serena. -Oh, Nate.

-Oh, no. Oh, no. -Maybe not.

HAROLD: Sweetie, put her in the bath... ...before your

mother gets wind of this situation.

What, and leave you all alone?

Thanksgiving is our thing.

Nate, will you please take care of her?

-Please? -I will. Come on.

BLAIR: Daddy, can I help with the pumpkin pie?

HAROLD: Of course.

-Thank you. -Crush them.

Thank you very much. Crush them.

Caterers?

What's going on here?

Everyone is getting ready for our lovely dinner...

...and you should be too.

Everyone except Daddy. Where is he?

-I thought you knew. -Knew what?

Your father isn't coming. He didn't tell you?

Well, he decided to stay in Paris.

He's got either too much work or Roman is too much

work.

-Who knows? -I don't understand.

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Season 1

If he wasn't coming, why wouldn't he call and tell me?

You should know by now, your father is not a fan of the

difficult conversation.

Now, why don't you run along and change into

something a little more... ...enchanting?

That's good.

Are you sure you don't want us to stay?

We don't wanna leave you, if you don't feel well.

No, you kids have fun.

I don't have an appetite anyway.

Oh, hold on a second. That must be Dan.

-Hey! -Room service.

Oh, no, no, no, sir. You have the wrong room.

Oh, no. You're early.

-I lied. -Mom.

All I care about is that you two are together.

I don't wanna be an imposition.

Man with van at your service.

SERENA: Hey. -Hey.

Bold choice of attire, unless it's what's on the runway

these days.

No, my mom's sicked out because she didn't wanna be

imposing.

You know what? I am fine just curling up and reading a

good book.

You're supposed to be with your family.

Yeah, and Nicholas Sparks is hardly family.

I'm not taking no for an answer. I'm not even asking.

You are coming with us.

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Season 1

-I'm adult-napping you. -Fine, just stop talking and I'll

get ready.

Make it snappy, I'm double-parked. Thanks.

RUFUS [ON RECORDING]: Hey, Rufus Humphrey.

Leave a message and I'll get back to you.

Rufus, it's Lily.

Your very persistent son insisted that I join you for

dinner.

I want to remind you that my kids do not know that we

are friendly...

...and I would like to keep it that way.

That said, I look forward to seeing you.

How could he just blow me off?

Thanksgiving is our ritual.

You know, he didn't even call? How hard is it to pick up

the phone?

Miss Blair, maybe you pick up phone, call your Papa.

Maybe he tell you the real story.

Real story?

With pearls.

Tastes good, Mom.

Thank God Citarella was still open.

I had to improvise... ...since we were disinvited from

the Waldorfs' at the last minute.

Like I was asked to step down from the committee for

the Snowflake Ball...

...and I wasn't asked back to the Lincoln Center

Foundation.

But your father's lawyer might join us.

Mom, stop. You were all for acting like nothing was
wrong until it landed on you.

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Season 1

I forgot to call the bondsman. Maybe he has nowhere

to go.

Mom, this is not the right way--

Nathaniel, I don't need you to fight this fight for me.

-Where do you think you're going? NATE: Anywhere but

here.

What's taking Dan and Serena so long?

DAN: Hey, we're here. ALISON: There you are.

You're lucky the turkey's still hot.

Mom, this is Serena and this is her brother, Eric.

-It is so nice to meet you both. -Nice to meet you too.

ERIC: Hi. -And this is their mother, Lily.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Just in time. I thought you're gonna bring pie.

I did, but it got run over...

...by a taxi as I was trying to help this girl stay out of

traffic.

Who needs dessert when we have a real-life hero in

our midst?

Your brother just saved a girl.

Thought you had to be near a girl for that to happen.

Not just any girl, the girl.

-The blond you stalk at school? DAN: Just the one.

A thing for blonds. You are your father's son.

Not just any blond.

Apparently, I like the ones who get drunk on

Thanksgiving and almost die.

Well, your dad liked them dangerous and troubled too.

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Season 1

-You were dangerous? -Who said I was talking about

me?

I didn't realize there was anyone else.

Well, it is so nice to meet you.

Alison.

Right, it's nice to meet you too.

-Lily, was it? -Yes.

Well, I'm just gonna take these coats and put them in
Dan's room.

You know what? It's okay, I've got them.

Oh, thank you.

Okay, Eric and Jenny, napkin duty.

Serena and Dan, I want every water glass filled and

every candle lit.

I am sorry. I did not know that you were--

Back? Well, I am.

And why would you know?

Well, Dan never mentioned it when he invited me.

-I called. -I didn't hear the phone.

You know what? It's fine.

Let's just have a great time. This holiday's about

sharing.

Right. And if you don't mind, could we not share too

much?

I haven't exactly told my kids about my past.

Well, our past.

DAN: Hey, turkey's almost room temp, guys.

Come on down.

Grab the mashed.

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Season 1

I got that.

RUFUS: Happy Thanksgiving.

-I wanted to talk to you. -The guy with no hair?

Yeah.

Blair, you haven't touched your food.

Come on, darling, what has gotten into you?

Well, I was going to wait till after dinner...

...but I guess now is as good a time as any.

Did you call Daddy and say I didn't wanna see him?

Of course not. What a ridiculous accusation.

You didn't tell him that I was so angry I didn't even

wanna talk to him today?

You had no right to uninvite him.

When are you gonna get it through your head?

He left us.

-He didn't leave us, he left you. -That's enough.

That's enough.

If you wanna take this up with me...

...we can discuss it later after our guests have left.

You either eat or you leave the table.

I told you, I'm not hungry.

Or maybe dessert'll change your mind.

Where is Daddy's pie?

I don't see his pie.

There were many delicious choices coming from the

caterer...

...we just sent that one down to the doorman.

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Season 1

Well, it is Thanksgiving, after all, huh?

Now, choose one of those amazing desserts.

Mrs. van der Woodsen, what were Thanksgivings like

growing up?

Serena said you were raised in California? I grew up on

a little ranch in Montecito.

-I didn't know there were little ranches. -There aren't.

Don't wanna be rude, but I should take this.

DAN: Yeah, sure.

Hey, we're right in the middle of din--

Yeah, of course. I'm on my way.

-What's up? -I'm sorry, but I have to go.

-Is everything all right? -No, but it will be, I hope.

Sorry, I can't really say more, but it's nothing about us.

-I was having fun, though. -Okay. All right.

Bye.

Oh, of course. You're such a good friend.

Look, I hope you don't mind, but my daughter has to

go.

-Do you need to go with her? SERENA: No, no.

Stay, have fun, please. Thanks, guys.

It was nice to meet you.

She gonna be okay?

Yeah, I don't think it has anything to do with her.

But you were talking about your ranch.

-Did you have any horses? -Yes, I had a few.

I had my own, Rosewood.

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-Dad has a song called Rosewood. -Not that

Rosewood.

DAN: I completely forgot about that song.

It's about my mom. She had this perfume...

-and it was rose and-- DAN: Sandalwood.

Sandalwood. It was like her own personal scent.

-I'm a fool. -You're not a fool.

Raise your hand if you're over 30 and acting really

weird right now.

LILY: I'm sorry, Alison. I never told Rufus about that

horse.

So I'm sure it's just a coincidence.

DAN: Wait a minute here.

Why are you talking like you know each other?

Do you two know each other?

We kind of did know each other a long, long time ago.

-What? -Know each other how?

Oh, my God.

This is unbelievable. I need some air.

Don't follow me.

You have a lot of explaining to do.

Mom, wait.

-May we please be excused? -Yeah, sure.

Watch it. Come on, come on, come on.

-I don't want a bath. -Too bad.

Blair's direct orders.

-Blair's not the boss of me. -Sit.

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Oh, are you new here? Because Blair's the boss of all
of us.

Oh, seriously, you smell like the floor of a brewery.

-I do not. -Yes, you do.

-Oh, my God, yes, I do. -Yep.

Brewery floor with a hint of secondhand smoke.

-And then a pint of Old Spice. -I totally need a bath.

Yeah, deal with it.

-Blair's a bossy genius. -Oh, yes, she is.

So, what about you?

What about me? I don't smell like an ashtray.

But you look like an ass tray.

Serena, please. Stop, stop, stop.

Stop, Serena. Serena, stop.

What's wrong with you?

SERENA: Oh. Oh.

NATE: What, what, what? -Get off of me. Stop it.

-Give, give me-- -What are you guys doing?

I'm king of the world. I'm king of the world.

SERENA: Hey, it's me.

I didn't mean for it to happen.

I didn't see your dad downstairs.

My mother just decides everything, you know?

Everything in the world is just totally up to her.

I know.

Hey, you wanna get out of here?

I'm not going back to that party.

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Season 1

No, I mean "out of here" out of here.

Out of this apartment.

To a place a little more sane.

Any place would qualify.

So you actually threatened Lily van der Woodsen...

...with physical violence?

Mom, you are a badass.

ALISON: Yeah, well, what can I say? I was younger

then.

And wearing steel-toed boots.

No, no, no. We never actually came to blows.

I focused on transforming my anger into art.

I made some collages. I wrote a trilogy of one-act

plays about her...

...named the character Milly to try to be, you know,

subtle.

That's clever.

So, what was so bad about her?

And I mean, aside from the superior fluttering eyelids

and punishing sarcasm.

Well, she was your dad's first great love.

As she liked to remind me every chance she got.

It's kind of hard to compete with that.

You've been in here for a half-hour.

Not nearly enough time to fathom...

...how you allowed me to walk into this situation.

Allowed you?

You were the last person I expected to come through

my door today.

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At least you knew that Serena would come home...

...and tell me all about the wonderful Thanksgiving she

had with Dan...

...his father, oh, and his mother.

Is this really how you think I deserved to find out?

I don't know what I do or do not owe you.

I mean, we haven't actually defined what we are to

each other.

Well, maybe this is the perfect opportunity to do it.

Lily....

These past few weeks have--

Have been what?

-You can't even say it, can you? -I can.

But I shouldn't.

Look, for better or for worse, you're one of my oldest

friends.

Oldest friends?

That's certainly not how it felt when you kissed me at

Eleanor's party.

What?

Alison, honey....

Dan, will you go and...?

Check on Jenny and Eric.

Yeah.

NATE: Mom, where's Dad? ANNE: How dare you do

that?

Leave in the middle of Thanksgiving dinner?

NATE: I need to talk to Dad.

Dad?

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Season 1

Dad?

Oh, my God, Dad. Dad.

Mom, call 911! Hurry!

Dad, please wake up. Dad!

SERENA: Doreeta.

-Stop. -Easy.

-Take a seat, honey. -Oh, how do I smell now?

You smell fantastic, but don't keep asking people that.

Serena, you look wonderful. That shirt was made for

you.

6-Actually, it was made for you. -I knew there was a

reason I liked it.

-Yours too, I see. -And mine.

-Oh, no, no, no. -No.

-Would you help me with the potatoes? -Yes. Ah!

Don't tell me it's a big deal. I'm well aware of the

stakes.

Who's Dad talking to?

The office. Something about the deal with the Dutch

company.

I'll have to slip out for a few minutes.

-Dad, it's a holiday. -Not in Amsterdam.

Well, we are in America.

-Tell them it will wait till tomorrow. -Sweetheart, I don't

wanna go, I have to.

I brought this deal in...

...but if Meltzer closes it without me, I don't get the

commission.

Forget the commission. I'll write you a check myself.

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Season 1

Sit, we're just about to eat.

I think I just lost my appetite.

Your father and his headaches.

Probably took the Vicodin and forgot.

-Had some whiskey and the next thing-- -Mom.

Did you hear anything the doctor said?

With what he took, he could have cured 30 headaches.

Mom, he's got a problem and ignoring it almost killed

him.

-Oh, no, this is not my fault. -I'm not blaming

anybody.

Blame whoever you want, just not me. I'm trying to

make his life easier.

Easier?

-You've made his life impossible. -What do you mean?

He's had everything he ever wanted just handed to him.

My dad set him up with his own firm.

Gave us the house we live in. The Hamptons, the boat.

He's never had to earn a dime. How do you think that's

working for him?

Wake up!

All he had to do was sit behind a desk, put on a suit

and not get arrested...

...and he couldn't manage to do that.

But you want me to give him more responsibility in the

family?

I don't know what the answer is...

...but we can't keep going on like this or else we'll lose

him.

Excuse me. Sorry to interrupt.

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Season 1

But Mr. Archibald is awake. He was asking for you.

-Thank you. -You're welcome.

I'll go see how he's doing.

No, I will.

I'm not saying you're overreacting, just having a

reaction above appropriate.

I have been trying to make up for what happened in

Hudson.

Not an overreaction.

Then I find out you are making out at theme parties?

It was hardly making out, and there's an explanation.

Hi, guys, I'm back and I brought Blair.

BLAIR: Hey.

Wow. Weird vibe.

Okay, where's Dan?

-No chance we're related? -Look at Eric's roots.

-What's wrong with my roots? -They're kind of Rufus-

like.

SERENA: Hey. DAN: Serena and Blair.

JENNY: Blair? -Yeah. It's me.

Explanation to follow, but first, what's going on with our

parents?

-Oh. Our dad dated your mom. -Yeah, we're not

related, though.

-What? -Ignore my roots.

-Wait. Wait, what? BLAIR: You know what's really

weird?

There is a garage door in the middle of your room.

-Oh, is that Cedric? -Well, this day just got a lot

worse.

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Season 1

Hold on, how serious were they, our parents?

I think it's safe to say that they have had sex.

Oh. No, no, no. No, I'm gonna faint.

To repeat, we are not related.

She was a groupie and he was almost famous.

Suddenly my family seems so sane.

This is too much to handle on an empty stomach.

-Well, we're not going back out there. -Well, can we

leave here then, please?

Escape, I don't know, maybe eat?

DAN: That's why they call it a fire escape.

We're splitting hairs here. An emotional affair is just as

bad as a physical one.

Oh, please. Emotional affairs are necessary to keep a

marriage alive.

How many times have you been divorced? Alison, this

is not about Lily. It's about us.

Exactly. If we're gonna have any chance, then she

can't be here.

What, for Thanksgiving? Or ever?

-Oh, you can't be serious. ALISON: I am.

Look, I have made mistakes and I know that.

But if she's in your life, you're never gonna get over

her.

-Alison-- -This is it, Rufus, okay?

If you wanna make this work, then you have to make a

choice.

Mom is a hypocrite. All these years, she's been riding

me about my behavior.

She's mad at you for being her.

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Season 1

The whole time my dad has given me this advice based

on this girl he dated.

-This girl a lot like Serena. -It's her mom.

It makes sense that your mom was a groupie.

Only a woman that had completely satisfied...

...her sexual appetite in her youth would ever marry

your stepdads.

-Can we not talk about her appetite? -Or who satisfied

it.

-It's just-- -So gross.

Yeah.

-Hi. -Hey, Mom.

Is everything okay?

Yeah.

Do you wanna go home?

Oh, no, no, not yet.

I need fries.

Excuse me, could I get some french fries and just keep
them coming?

Sure, coming right up.

We should-- Jenny and I should probably head back to

the loft.

I'm gonna go too. Leave you guys alone.

S, thank you.

For today.

The sandwich was delicious and I'm calling Dr.

Sherman tomorrow.

-Bye. -Bye.

Is that really necessary, Mom?

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Season 1

From what I hear, you have been in places far dirtier

than this.

Well....

Please.

Try spending nine hours with Jane's Addiction on the

Ohio Turnpike.

Then we'll talk about dirty.

Okay.

DAN: See you later, Waldorf.

-So today was not boring. -No.

I never should have asked Mom to come home...

...but I just didn't see this coming.

Who could've? Don't worry about it.

So weird to think that our parents had lives before us.

I know. Or that they had lives before each other.

Lily seemed pretty upset.

I wonder what happened while we were gone.

Um.... I don't know, but it looks like we're about to find

out.

Hey, who's in the mood for a little Humphrey family

scrimmage?

What? Kids against parents? Boys against girls?

Girls against the boys. Last year, I got burned by Dan's

weak forward pass.

Hey, hey. I was nursing a rotator cuff injury from aught

five.

-Come on, Mom, let's work out our plays. -Yep.

So, Dad, not that I'm mad exactly...

...but not telling me about Serena's mom was extremely

uncool.

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Season 1

I should have said something, I know. And I'm sorry.

Given the ick factor... ...I would say you set my

progress back by at least several months.

Oh, come on, you're a Humphrey man.

No daughter of Lily's could ever resist.

How'd you leave it back there with her?

Well, I wouldn't be expecting Lil over for dinner anytime

soon.

Your mom and I need to focus on the future, not the

past...

...and that's a lot easier for all of us without her

around.

Well, let's play with the old pigskin, then.

Mom.

-Here you are. -And here you are.

You had me worried sick.

Blair, I--

I know I shouldn't have lied to you about your father.

That never stopped you before.

True, but the real truth.

Divorce papers from your father.

I am supposed to sign them.

-I haven't yet. -Mom.

He's living in Europe...

...with a man.

You can't be all that surprised that he wants a divorce.

I'm not.

But what I am surprised about is how it makes me feel.

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Season 1

He was my husband, after all.

He was my Harold for almost 20 years.

I couldn't face him during the holidays.

It was always our happiest time.

Why didn't you just tell me that?

And let you choose between the two of us?

I wonder who would have won that battle.

Yeah, then I would've been entirely alone.

Although I was anyway. Heh.

It's still Thanksgiving.

Yeah.

What do you wanna do?

-Hey. -You're still here.

I guess I must've fallen back asleep.

Yeah, you were pretty out of it when I first came in.

Where's your mom?

She's getting coffee.

How's your mom?

She's gonna be all right.

We all are.

So Vicodin and whiskey, huh?

Guess I forgot I took that medicine when-- Dad, we're

not doing this anymore.

Okay? We're just not.

-I know it wasn't an accident. -Of course it was.

When I found you, I thought you were dead.

I'm sorry.

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Season 1

I just didn't--

-I couldn't-- -Yes, you can.

Dad, you have to, please.

I know it might not always feel that way...

...but we need you.

Dad, we need you.

Here you go, Nate.

Thank you, Mr. Waldorf. My dad will appreciate this.

Leave out the gravy. He's got high cholesterol.

-Anne-- -Mom, seriously.

-Come on. You add some gravy. -Okay.

-Happy Thanksgiving. -Yeah, you too, man.

-Bye. -See you soon.

-Good night, sweetheart. -Good night.

-Happy Thanksgiving. -Hi.

-Happy Thanksgiving. -Nice to see you as well.

Bye.

-Happy Thanksgiving, Blair. -Hi.

I'm looking for my daughter. Where is my little girl?

Hi.

Too much turkey? Uh-huh.

Bye, Blair.

Happy Thanksgiving.

ELEANOR: This time, how about the ginger tea.

Hello.

Where were you?

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Season 1

Exquisite, just saying.

Hey, Dan, will you pass the mashed?

-What? I'm sorry. -Come on, you're asleep at the

wheel.

Thanksgiving dinner's a well-oiled machine.

Still thinking about your dream girl?

What? No.

No, no, I'm thinking about the--

Your stuffing, Mom, which looks delicious.

-Yeah. -Your stuffing.

Keep dreaming. Maybe one day she'll know your name.

Yeah, maybe. Then I'll have something to be thankful

for.

Shut up. Really, you know? What's that all about?

End

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