How To Sell The Way People Buy

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2 How to ‘Sell’ the Way People Buy! ©2021 Michael Oliver / Natural Selling
Contents - How To Sell The Way People Buy! - Part 1
Welcome. Introduction Page 4
Chapter 1. The Supporting NeuroScience Page 6
Chapter 2: What Is The Greatest Fear? Page 10
Chapter 3. The Fear of Rejection is NOT The Problem! Page 15
Chapter 4. The 3 Main Causes of Rejection & Objections Page 17
Chapter 5. Remove, Reframe, Rebuild! Page 24
Chapter 6. Natural Selling Principle #1 Page 27
Chapter 11. What's Next Page 69
Support Page 74
Introduction
Hello, and welcome to this short and life-changing

introduction to “How To ‘Sell’ the Way People Buy!”- The
science of listening your potential buyers into willingly
want to listen to and buy from you!
Whether you’re brand new to selling or a seasoned veteran...This book might

well be the most transformational book on how to ‘sell’ the way people buy, you’ll
ever read.
You’re about to discover the reasons WHY standard sales techniques, STILL
mostly taught to THIS day… Actually, cause the resistance that could be holding
you or your sales team back.
And as you do, you’ll easily become aware of how excited you are as you
understand WHY potential buyers throw up the barriers of resistance and even
MORE excited later when you learn how you will reverse this 180 degrees!
You’ll also discover the latest in neuroscience that supports what you’re about to
find, so you don’t have to take my word for it, nor the word of all my students,
some of whom now earn as high as seven-figure annual commissions.
You’ll find that instead of trying to pressure and persuade your potential buyers...
They will actually persuade themselves you’re the right person to do business
with, and willingly want to lean in and listen to what you have to say, as the
Trusted Authority!
And I know when you take action on what you discover, and approach and talk
with your potential buyers with a different mindset, you’ll be surprised at how
differently they will respond to you!
You’ll be relaxed, confident and your success will dramatically increase… Just
like my other clients and students across the world whom I’ve trained, coached
and mentored for the last 23 years.
Here’s to that success!
PS - To get the most out of what you’re about to learn, read each page
thoroughly. Allow yourself to be absorbed in it to get the full benefit of this major
mindset shift in selling.
Chapter 1
Chapter 1. The Supporting NeuroScience
Neuroscientists and behavioral researchers in the science of sales and marketing

discovered... There’s a “switch” inside the brain that, depending on the way you
approach and talk with your potential buyers… Will either flip one way and divert
you to the part of their brain that creates resistance… Or flip the other way and
gain you access to the part of their brain that immediately dissolves resistance
and accepts you as someone to be trusted.
The choice is yours as to which way that switch is flipped!
The Amygdala
The part of the brain that creates resistance, is called the Amygdala. The
amygdala is the old part of our brain where our fight, flight or freeze responses
are triggered. It activates when someone is suspicious.
To put it simply and in context, if you confront a potential buyer with pushy sales
behavior such as a sales pitch, or sales pressure, or use standard model sales
techniques you immediately get diverted to their Amygdala which lights up like a
firework display that says:
• I’m suspicious and don’t trust this person
• This person is a threat
• This person is going to deceive me
Their subconscious threat detection mechanism perceives the threat right from
the beginning, analyses it and sends a course of action to the conscious mind to
deal with it by resisting. And this happens long before their conscious brain gets
engaged!
So, if you’ve ever wondered why potential buyers get wary and go into a flight,
flight or freeze response, now you know why!
On the other hand… If you approach potential buyers with a different mindset,
and different language based on a new mindset that you’re about to learn, by
INVOLVING them with non-threatening behavior, and listening to and responding
to them respectfully… You’ll flip the switch to the other side, and a very different
part of the brain lights up. It’s the Prefrontal Cortex.
The Prefrontal Cortex
The prefrontal cortex has to do with personality expression, social judgments

based on reputation, and decision making. It’s the “thoughtful” and social part of
the brain based on inner values and needs.
In other words, if you want to ‘sell’ the way people buy… THIS is the part of
your potential buyers' brain you want to reach and communicate with. Flipping
the switch to this side immediately dissolves resistance, eliminates tension or
friction and has people willingly engage with you.
Taking with potential buyers using Natural Selling Conversational Dialogue,

which is based on 5 Natural Selling Principles, will do this for you. It’s a
neuroscientific supported foundation where your new thinking and new approach;
• Lights up their prefrontal cortex

• Dissolves resistance before it happens!
• Acknowledges and motivates their unique inner values and needs
• Evokes emotions and feelings at the same time
• Has them looking favorably at you as a person to be trusted
It lets you communicate at a level where;
• REAL and immediate rapport and relationship building takes place
• REAL positive change takes place, for both you and your potential buyers
It’s the SECRET to understanding how to let your potential buyers actually
persuade themselves to want to listen to and do business with you. It’s the KEY
to getting down to business quickly, and IMMEDIATELY establishing the know
and trust foundation so necessary to be successful.
Instead of being regarded cautiously - You’re looked on and respected as the

Trusted Authority right from the beginning, sitting side by side with your
potential buyers working together in mutual collaboration.
And when you do, and when you experience it… It will be like turning on a light
switch in a dark room and seeing things that were always there that you never
noticed before.
So, how do you attract your potential buyers’ prefrontal cortex using the 5
Natural Selling Principles as a foundation?
Let’s start by understanding the cause of the resistance first and then the
antidote!
Chapter 2
Chapter 2: What Is The Greatest Fear?
When I ask salespeople and networkers…
“What is the greatest fear that holds you back from talking with or following up
with potential buyers?” most give the answer... “The fear of “Rejection!”
Now, if this in any way reflects you and your experience… How does it make
YOU feel when you get rejected or even think about rejection?
Tense? Tight? Feeling inadequate? Fearful - Perhaps? Holding back from

making calls…? Regardless of what you might have been told… It’s a real
feeling, isn't it?
While the feeling is different for all of us, the end result is the same… We don’t
like the tension and the way it can hold us back and end up losing us sales.
And have you ever been taught that rejection is part of selling…To expect it, deal
with it, get over it, and that every ‘No’ gets you closer to a ‘Yes’, and so on? If
you have, you might also have been taught or learned techniques like;
• Talk about or present the features and benefits of your product or service
as soon as you can.
• ABC - Always Be Closing
• Close soon and close often
• The more objections you can overcome the more successful you’ll be
• Getting rejected is not personal - It’s only a potential customer asking for
more information
• Selling is a numbers game
And it’s true… With this kind of sales model, it does make selling a numbers
game! A game of plowing through as many potential buyers as you can… Using
sales techniques to pressure them until you get a sale.
Well, I don’t subscribe to that way of thinking and approaching people! Never
have - Never will!
The sad thing about the numbers game is the heavy toll in emotional time, effort
and money - Which is too much for many salespeople and networkers. They
either hold back from making the calls and connections they should be making to
succeed, or… Just won’t do it!
It’s not that they can’t do it… They won’t do it! And there is a reason for this. It
has to do with the unintended consequences of a standard sales model based on
an approach that works for a very small number of people (about 15-17% of the
population) who have a certain personality and style. These are the same people
by the way, who made this model up many years ago!
So, what about the other 83-85%?
For them it’s fundamentally flawed approach that is inadvertently designed to fail
most of the time! It would be like flying from London to Los Angeles in a plane
that has an 85% chance of NOT getting to its destination! Would you take that
chance? I doubt it!
And yet many salespeople do just that every day when connecting with potential
buyers. Unknowingly they set themselves up for failure by using sales models
that create the resistance they don’t want. Sales models that are adversarial,
uncomfortable for both the salesperson and the people they’re calling.
If this looks, sounds or feels like what is happening to you… The good news is…
You don't have to accept this anymore! Because while it might be someone
else’s truth or idea of selling… You don’t have to make it yours!
From when I started selling apartment building hot water solar systems in
California in early 1980… These standard sales approaches never resonated
with me. They felt too adversarial and unnatural. After a few months of doing it,
(successfully I might add and making a lot of money on commission BUT hating
every step of the way!) I started thinking… “There has to be another way!”
And there is - A Proven Neuroscientific Supported Effective Way! As I’ll explain.
A Critical Distinction
I’ll share with you there is a critical distinction… Between the standard present-
day sales techniques and systems that are designed to PRESSURE your
potential customers to do what YOU want them to do… Techniques that actually
cause the resistance you don’t want…
And Natural Selling… Which comes from a holistic desire to help... And let your
potential buyers PERSUADE and INFLUENCE THEMSELVES to willingly lean
in and want to listen to and buy from you… Without using ANY external sales
pressure techniques!
And it’s a distinction that will dissolve ANY tension or friction you might feel that
holds you back from talking with people. It’s also a distinction that will stop you
unconsciously saying things or using words that create resistance!
What do you think THAT is going to do for your sales and personal well being
when you do that?
Well - you can, and will… When you take action on the 5 Natural Selling
Principles, and People Knowledge and Relationship skills here in my book and
that have taken so many salespeople to the top.
New Rules – New Model
Real change starts when you start questioning, challenging, and changing rules
that don’t work for you... And replace them with rules that will! And the rules that
will, are written on the OUTSIDE walls of the proverbial mindset box - NOT in it!
To see these rules, you have literally have to climb out of the box, climb down to
the outside and... Read them - Understand them, and then… Take action on
them. Taking action takes you into the rarified and satisfying atmosphere of being
in the top 3% of sales people who know that they know!
So instead of being trapped in the standard “Numbers Game” and techniques

mindset and approach where you plow through as many people as possible…
You turn your selling experience into a Quality Game, a relaxed approach of;
1. Talking with more potential buyers in less time with zero stress and friction
2. Having your potential buyers wanting to listen to and buy from you …
Because they trust you!
Chapter 3
Chapter 3. Fear of Rejection is NOT the Problem!
The first step to real change is to appreciate that... The tension or fear of
rejection is NOT the problem! Fear is just the symptom of the problem. The
problem is what is CAUSING the fear!
This means that - If you identify and eliminate the cause of the fear… You also
eliminate what? The fear itself, don’t you?
For example, imagine you have a recurring headache you want to be rid of. Your
choice is to either take aspirin that will relieve the discomfort temporarily or…
You find the cause and take remedial action to relieve the pain for a lifetime!
It’s the same with selling!
You can either try and tough it out and continue using techniques that won’t
change much for you, or... You identify the cause, remove it and take remedial
action by changing the way you think about how to approach and talk with
potential buyers… So that they move toward you and not away from you!
The massive upside in all of this is that not only does it dissolve resistance and
eliminate the tension before it happens... Any tension your potential buyers might
have is eliminated as well! So, the choice is - Old Rules/Old Model or New
Rules/New Model?
I don’t know about you; I know which I prefer! If you do as well - Prepare yourself
for the coming paradigm shift by looking at the problem first and then the
solution!
Chapter 4
Chapter 4. The 3 Main Causes of Rejection & Objections
Have you noticed in our solution-oriented society that whenever we talk about a
problem… People seem to be more than ready to jump right in with their solution
saying things like… “You know what you should do…” And then without waiting,
proceeding to tell us?
We tend to be very solution-oriented in this society, don’t we? This is especially

true for many salespeople and networkers who are taught to talk about the
benefits of their products and services or tell their story as soon as they can.
Maybe you do this?
If you do… You probably find the eyes of your potential buyers glaze over as
they sense they are going to be pressured into doing something they are not
ready to do and start working out their exit strategy!
Let’s explore why this resistance happens, and then what you can do about it
and stop it from happening! There are 3 main causes of rejection and objections,
by the way.
#1 Cause of Resistance - Presenting Too Soon
Most sales training teaches you to think that because you have a solution…
You’re the expert and all that you have to do is “tell”, “present”, “educate” or
“share”, and over time enough people will listen to you!
And can doing this work? Yes, it can, if you have the time, energy, and the
stomach for approaching people this way, as you’ll lose more sales than you
gain, because it’s the perfect recipe for creating resistance!
Here’s why!
If you start by talking about your solution or your story as soon as you can...
Whose point of view, needs and values does it appear to your potential buyers
you're focusing on - Yours or theirs?
It’s yours, isn’t it? Your need to present or make a sale for example. It becomes
and feels obvious to the person you’re talking to! And do you think most people
are interested in you or what you think or what they should do? Mostly not! Who
ARE they interested in? They’re interested in themselves and what THEY think!
And if you do explode out of the gate talking about you and your solution…
Notice how they start backing away? Now, why is that? It’s because you’re
guessing what to tell them... And very rarely will guessing connect with their
unique needs and values.
Here’s a simple personal example that will give you the picture.
I went to buy a printer some time ago. After ‘Hello’ and finding out I needed a
printer… The salesperson immediately started telling me about the different
models on display and their features and advantages. Except for me, they
weren’t advantages - Because most of the features were of no relevance to me.
All I needed was a robust workhorse that would quickly print black and white draft
copies from my computer!
So, he quickly lost me, though lucky for him I still bought... Only because I asked
him the questions he should have asked me… And, I didn’t have the time to go
elsewhere!
The moral of the story is - If you guess what to say and present… Very rarely will
there be a fit between what you perceive as the correct features and value when
your potential buyer has their own unique set of what and why they want what
they want. Blindly guessing creates tension and resistance. And this is only part
of it - It can get worse!
#2 Cause of Resistance - Using Closing Techniques
Have you been taught or think you have to - Always Be Closing, Close Soon and
Close Often? Using 'closing techniques’ means applying pressure on your
potential buyers to get them to do what you want them to do.
If you do that... Again, whose point of view and Personal Agenda, does it sound
and feel like to the other person you’re focusing on? Yours, isn’t it?
Here’s the thing… Do you think people like being forced into a corner, and having
their escape route blocked off by having external pressure put on them to buy?
Pressuring people only serves to lessen the credibility of the salesperson, their
company, and products they represent, and the sales industry as a whole.
Perhaps you’ve heard of one of the natural laws of the Law of Attraction, which is
Cause and Effect. Simply put… What You Give is What You Get! Pressure
your potential buyers, and they will pressure you back! And how do they do this?
By objecting to and rejecting your bad behaviour!
This natural law does not discriminate! It can either work for you or against you -
It’s up to you!
#3 Cause of Resistance - Using Overcoming Objection Techniques
Using overcoming objection techniques is a result of thinking that your potential

buyers' questions, concerns or comments are objections to be overcome… Using
tactics such as the “Yes, but…” response. For example, here’s the classic ‘Yes
But… Feel, Felt, Found’ technique...
Yes, I know how you feel... But many of my customers felt the same way,
until they found that...
If you use any type of response like this, once more, whose personal agenda
does it appear to the other person you’re focusing on - Yours or theirs? Yours
doesn’t it!
The question is, do you think they like to be pressured, and told they are wrong
with “Yes, But...” responses... Even if they might be wrong! And do you think they
really care about you telling them how you feel and how others felt or found?
Using overcoming objection techniques is like playing ping pong, going back and
forth until one person loses. It’s a game in which mostly, they win, and you lose,
because in the end, the potential buyer is always right! Using overcoming
objection techniques demonstrates…
• You’re not listening
• You’re not interested in what they have to say or ask
• What they have to say or ask is not important
And if you’ve been told that objections are your potential buyers looking for more
information... Don’t be fooled - Because most times they’re not! What they’re
objecting to is more bad behavior!
Brushing aside and disrespectfully responding to questions, comments, or

concerns as objections to be overcome also creates resistance... Even if there
was none in the first place!
It’s Crazy, isn’t it?
You’re taught to use techniques that cause resistance and tension… And
then you have to learn more techniques in an attempt to break down the barriers
you created in the first place! It’s like putting up a barbed-wire fence in front of
you and then trying to get over it! I don't know about you… It never made sense
to me.
So, the big question is…
1. If you’re experiencing resistance and the tension is holding you back from
happily making the call
2. If you’re using any or all of the 3 rejection and objection causing sales
techniques
3. And you accept that you create the resistance, not them…
Then being the creator, do you think you can create the opposite?
Of course, you can! Eliminating rejection and objections, as well as the tension
and friction and instead, getting positive responses EVERY SINGLE TIME is
easy… If you stop telling, guessing, closing, and pressuring... And instead start
asking and listening.
Natural Selling salespeople...
1. Don’t guess when presenting!

Instead, they know exactly what, how and most importantly - When to
accurately present their solution so that it has meaning based on the
values of their potential buyers
2. Don’t close early and often

Instead, they know how to let their potential buyers persuade themselves
to want to listen, find out more and buy!
3. Never respond to questions, concerns or comments as resistance or

objections to be overcome.
Instead, they regard and accept questions, concerns or comments as part
of the Conversational Dialogue to be discussed and not rebutted.
They also recognize that while they might be experts in what their products or
services can do… They also know that their potential buyers;
1. Are experts in what they know, what they want, and…
2. Know their outer logical and unique inner subjective and emotional
reasons as to why they want what they want!
It’s just a simple matter of asking and finding out! And if you come from a place of
authenticity and integrity, they will reveal to you things not even their closest
friends know about! Why? Because their closest friends are too busy talking and
not listening! So how do you go about this?
Chapter 5
Chapter 5. Remove, Reframe, Rebuild!
It’s more than likely you’ve been taught that selling is about helping people
satisfy their needs and to get what they want. If you have, so far, so good!
The question is, how do you do that with authenticity, integrity and a straight
face… If you use a sales model designed to satisfy your need to get what you
want, over your potential buyers need to get what they want? There’s a big
disconnect, isn’t there?
The answer is to…
1. REMOVE the techniques
2. REFRAME your thinking
3. REBUILD your approach and how you talk with people
It’s like establishing a strong foundation for a new house. Before you build the
house, you first prepare the ground, don’t you, getting rid of all the toxins! Then
you sink deep pilings to create a strong foundation on which to build a solid
structure that will stand up and last forever. It’s the same with Natural Selling,
using principles as your foundation instead of techniques.
5 Natural Selling Principles - Your New Mindset Foundation
In chapter 5, you’ll see how 5 Natural Selling Principles become the deep
foundational pilings supporting the structure of your approach that has your
potential buyers quite willingly tell you their… Logical and Inner Personal
Subjective/Emotional Buying Blueprint that is unique to them. So, no more
guessing at what to present! It will all be laid out for you like a buffet!
At the same time, you’ll discover why they’ll automatically feel... You’re the
Trusted Authority they want to listen to and buy from. So now, when it’s time to
talk about and present how you can help them with your product or service, you’ll
make a winning presentation because it will be based on their precise needs and
values!
Why Principles And Not Techniques?
Think about this ancient saying for a moment;
Techniques are many

Principles are few
Techniques can vary
Principles never do
To illustrate the point; What do you think would happen if you went from selling a
product using standard techniques of presenting, closing and objection
handling... To selling software, using the same techniques on a buyer in a
software company?
You’d quickly be shown the door, wouldn’t you! The reason being selling
software requires a collaborative approach - Not an aggressive one!
So, using techniques learned in one industry are rarely transferable to another.
Whereas principles;
• Are transferable - To any industry
• Replace the limitation of techniques
Being transferable these 5 principles will last you a lifetime, for both your
personal and your professional life. Let’s look at each principle in detail.
Chapter 6
Chapter 6 - Natural Selling Principle #1
Natural Selling is Detaching From Your Needs So You Can Focus on

Theirs!
This principle, along with Principle #2, is the foundation of how to effectively
stimulate your potential buyer’s prefrontal cortex to create the atmosphere of
trust and rapport using Natural Selling Conversational Dialogue.
Dialogue is the key! You’ll find out what dialogue is, why it works and why it’s the
most effective way of influencing your potential buyers to listen to you and have
them persuade themselves you’re the person they want to deal with.
The 3 Ways to Communicate and Persuade
Behavioral scientists have shown for many years there are 3 ways to
communicate, influence and persuade, and that we are:
1. Least persuasive when we tell people things or attempt to dominate them,

such as Presenting, Telling, Teaching, or Persuading.
2. We are MORE persuasive when we interact and discover from each other,
such as Discussion and Debate.
3. We are MOST persuasive when we allow others to persuade themselves

using Dialogue.
While each of these 3 ways has its use, the last one (Dialogue) is the most
important for us to be effective. It is however the least used because it is the
least understood. Let’s look at all 3 to grasp what this means.
1. Presenting, Telling, Teaching, Persuading.
You already discovered rejection and objections is usually what you get if you
present too early or start talking about you or use closing and overcoming
objection techniques that put pressure on people.
A person persuaded against their will - Is of the same opinion still!
So, if telling and presenting, barely serves you, and more importantly your
potential buyers, the question is, can other ways of communicating serve the
both of you better?
2. Discussion and Debate
Discussion is something with which we all are already familiar. In his book, The
Fifth Discipline, Peter Senge defines discussion where…
"Different views are presented and defended and there is a search

for the best view to support decisions that must be made at this time.”
However, this type of conversation is prone to fall into a game where...
“You might occasionally accept another's view to strengthen your own,

but you want your view to prevail."
And this approach in selling does not always fully explore nor allow you to give
the same priority to the needs of your potential buyers as you do your own!
Giving priority to the needs of potential buyers is difficult for many salespeople
who have been taught techniques that focus on ‘getting the sale’ as their primary
objective.
And yet giving priority and exploring with others in a climate of mutual trust is vital
if you are to understand how to consistently help more potential buyers buy from
you and significantly increase your revenue. So, if you want to dramatically
change the results, dial it up and change the level of communication. And this is
where dialogue, or more specifically to us, Natural Selling Conversational
Dialogue comes in.
3. Dialogue
We are at our MOST persuasive when we allow others to persuade themselves.

And for us - Natural Selling Conversational Dialogue will bring about such
change.
The purpose of dialogue is to go beyond you and your potential buyers'

understanding so that, collectively and collaboratively… You are more
insightful, more intelligent and more creative than you can possibly be
individually. Peter Senge, says that in contrast to discussion...
"We are not trying to win in a dialogue. We all win in a dialogue if we are
doing it right.”
What this means is, that by working together and sitting on the same side of the
table, 1 + 1 no longer equals 2.
1 + 1 = 11…
I’ve been doing this for over three decades now since I discovered the power of
dialogue and adapted it to selling. It still amazes me how effective it is. Here are
some of the essential elements.
Detaching from Your Own Needs
Detaching from Your Own Needs, is the essence of Conversational Dialogue.
The key components are to;
1. Suspend or let go of all personal needs, assumptions, beliefs and

judgments.
2. Not allow yourself to be drawn into any preconditioned responses of telling,

arguing, debating or defending your point of view - Such as responding to
questions, or concerns as objections to be overcome!
Suspending or letting go of your need to make a sale is one example of many,

which might seem counterintuitive at first… Though you’ll discover it’s not, as you
progress through and understand the other Natural Selling Principles!
Natural Selling is not a contest - It’s a collaborative venture based on a neutral

conversation based on the premise that… “It seems you have a problem…I might
have a solution! Shall we talk?”
As Rumi, a Sufi philosopher once said;
Beyond the wrongdoing and the right doing, there is a field. I’ll meet you
there.
Using Conversational Dialogue, you create this field of neutral energy… A field
into which both you and your potential buyer’s step and work together to
collaboratively resolve their problems and satisfy their unique values and needs.
To create it… It’s you who must take the first step by suspending your own
needs, assumptions and judgments, etc. In return, your potential buyers will
reflect your behavior and do the same thing by willingly stepping into the same
field with you without resistance. They have no choice - There is nothing to resist!
It’s like a reed in a stream bending this way and that, going with the flow. What
you give is what you get.
And having taken the first step, by letting go of your own needs, you now follow
through and stay congruent, with your words and your actions.
Dialogue Is Nothing New
Socrates, a stonemason and carver in Athens, Greece some 2500 years ago, is
credited for refining the form of communication we know today as the Socratic
Dialogue. Socrates' purpose in life was to test all statements, recommendations,
explanations and personal truths... Even his own!
He questioned public and private men and stimulated them to think about and
question their thoughts and present situation... Though not by instruction or
telling... (He let go of all of that…) But by allowing them to listen to and FEEL
their own answers when he asked certain types of easy-to-answer questions.
This allowed them to come to their own logical and emotional conclusions to
make a change, and to change now! In other words, instead of him persuading
them… They persuaded themselves… By answering his questions out loud or
in their minds!
Even though he basically SAID very little, the answers to his questions opened
their minds to think, explore and feel things differently and in particular look upon
him as a wise man and wanting to know more.
And, just like Socratic Dialogue... Natural Selling Conversational Dialogue
does the same thing for you. Letting go of your own needs to focus on theirs, is
what I call Enlightened Detachment!
Enlightened Detachment
What this means is… By letting go of the old mindset of getting the sale… And
instead… Replacing it with your new mindset of letting go of the sale… You’ll
realize, ironically, more sales!
Let go of the outcome, and you’ll increase your income!
It’s a result of the integrity of your new approach. When you no longer think about
or treat potential buyers as pawns to get what you want, but as people and
helping them get what they want... It gives YOU the clear advantage in that you
no longer fit the stereotype of the majority of salespeople.
Your potential buyers feel this and are naturally drawn to you. You BECOME and
ARE, at the cellular level, the Trusted Authority and Advisor.
IMAGINE experiencing this… That every sales call from now on is as natural as
talking to your best friend! Imagine EXPERIENCING the effect of your potential
buyers eagerly actively engaged with you... As they logically and emotionally
increase their desire and resolve to want you to be the person they buy from as
they answer your questions.
Think about your boss, if you have one, or associates asking you what your
secret is to successfully and easily make more sales and having more time and
money to enjoy life!
Does this happen? Yes, all the time! Does that sound like a great way to live your
professional and personal life? If you do, I think so too, as do so many of those
who have taken action on what I’ve taught over the past 23 years.
And, what if by doing that, it DOES put you on the ladder getting you into the
rarefied atmosphere of the top 3 percent of consciously competent, highly
successful salespeople? Salespeople, who are comfortable in the knowledge that
they never have to worry about meeting quota by the end of the month because
they get there much sooner than that? Salespeople who will always have enough
money to live the life they like to live because worrying about work or money
never enters their mind!
Think about that… And think about the equation 1+1 = 11 and how Natural
Selling Conversational Dialogue makes it happen for you!
Chapter 7
Before I cover Principle #2 of Natural Selling, it will be helpful to put this principle
into context. To do this, consider the following question and write down or hold
the very first answer that comes to mind. Don’t challenge nor change it! There is
no right or wrong answer!
The question is this; What's the purpose of a business - Any business?
I know from having asked this question at hundreds of workshops and seminars
around the world, you either responded with something like... To make a profit,
make money, self-fulfillment... Or… with something like... Helping others!
If your response was similar to the first, such as making a profit... Ask yourself,
on whom was your answer focused... You or your potential buyers? It was on you
and what you want, wasn’t it? A what’s-in-it-for-me thinking and response.
I call this Your Personal Agenda or Your Personal Objective.
Now, if your response was similar to the second, such as helping others - On
whom was your answer focused? On others! A what’s-in-it-for-them response.
I call this Your Purpose.
Now, the reason I asked you this question, and to hold the very first thing you
said or that came to mind is to help you discover that... The Words You Say
Give You Away!
And this is why:
Your words are an extension of your thoughts
Your actions are an extension of your words
Your habits are an extension of your actions
And your reply to my question started with what? A thought! EVERYTHING

begins with a thought - EVERYTHING! And the first words that come out of your
mouth usually reveal what you’re really thinking... Because your words you say
are largely pre-determined by what you’ve been taught or experienced in the past
and have anchored into your subconscious mind.
Most times you’re not aware of it! And now... You are!
This is the reason why it was important to hold the first reply to my question, and
not question it. If you had time to think, it’s likely your conscious ego-mind would
challenge and sabotage your first subconscious thought with questions like…
• I wonder what Michael’s really asking?
• I wonder what a smart answer would be that would make me look good?
• I wonder what he wants me to say?
• I wonder what the right answer is?
The result being you might have ended up with an answer that didn’t reflect what
you truly thought at this moment in time! And just to be clear… It didn’t matter
what you replied - There is no judgment. There is no wrong or right answer! It
was a question designed to help you think about what you’re presently thinking
so you can learn from whatever answer you gave and take appropriate action.
It’s not just what we know that’s important,

it’s what we’re not aware of, that is!
I’ll almost guarantee your conscious mind started questioning and attempting to
influence your answer as soon as you said it, anyway!
Why Is This Important?
It’s important because it means that if you’re thinking about and focused on you
and what you want, such as your need to make a sale… Then the words you say
will give you away, won’t they? In other words, you pre-determine how your
potential buyers will respond to you by what you’re thinking and the words you
use that are an extension of your thinking.
You also resonate the energy that reveals your real intentions instantly. It’s cause
and effect again. And if you’re using sales techniques to get what you want,
whether you know it or not, THAT’s the energy you transmit that lights up their
amygdala, telling it you’re focused on your needs first. Almost certainly their
response will be one of caution and self-defence.
Thinking your business is about you and getting what you want, would be the
same as replying to a potential buyer who has asked you the purpose of your
business…
Well, potential buyer… The purpose of my business today is to make some

money!
How do you think he or she is going to feel about THAT?
Now, you might say... “So what? My business IS about me?” That’s true as well!
It’s not an either/or world. It’s an as/well world.
However, what if giving priority to that thought makes it harder for you to connect
with potential buyers and loses you more than you gain? You might already be
experiencing that right now. Your potential buyers know if you’re focused on you
and your Personal Agenda or Objective literally before you open your mouth.
Consider this. What If your business really IS About them and NOT About
You? What if... By letting go of your Personal Agenda, and putting it up on the
shelf… You make it easier and quicker to achieve your Personal Agenda?
That’s a game-changer, isn’t it?
And what if you anchored this thought in your subconscious and conscious
mind… And you lived and breathed this belief?
You see, the fundamental truth is... The purpose of a business IS to help people
solve their problems… Putting THEIR needs and values before yours, so that
you can achieve yours more easily!
Changing the way you think about your potential buyers, changes your language
and the way you approach them… Using words that attract and not distract! You
create a different energy and narrative and remarkably change your results!
So now you have the context, let’s look at what Principle #2 is exactly!
Principle #2: Natural Selling Is Helping People Solve Their Problems, And To
Get What They Want, Need Or Desire!
If we can agree that the purpose of your business and selling IS to help others
solve their problems… Then this means your prime function is to think of yourself
as a Problem Solver, doesn’t it? This simple rethink and act turns selling from
being a guessing and external pressure exercise into a Problem Solving
Exercise.
Problems are what we look for as salespeople! Other’s problems are your bread
and butter, because with problems comes what...? Opportunity! Boundless
opportunities if you’re committed to your business being about them and not you!
By the way, for clarification, the Definition of a Problem is simply the difference
between what someone has, and what they want, need or desire.
Natural Selling Is A Problem Solving Exercise
As a salesperson, it’s important to understand that an effective problem solver

knows how to let potential buyers tell themselves what the solution is and let
them persuade themselves to listen to and buy from you. Being effective goes
deeper than you might think!
Here’s why!
The problems you hear at first, many times are not the problems to be solved!
They tend to be the symptoms of a deeper problem that even your potential
buyers might not be aware of. Knowing how to;
1. Uncover not only the symptoms but reveal the cause of the problem,
turns you into the Trusted Advisor that demonstrates you’re different and
know what you’re doing
2. More importantly, knowing how to reveal and explore the potential

consequences of leaving the symptoms and the cause unresolved or from
choosing the wrong solution, makes you into an Extraordinary Trusted
Advisor!
3. Even more importantly, being able to reveal potential problems that weren’t
even thought about before, removes any remaining doubt you’re the
right person to deal with!
You’ll understand how and why in Principles 3 and 4.
The Tension Dissolves!
Another interesting thing happens when you let go of your own needs and focus
on your potential buyer’s needs. Tension and fear literally dissolves... For both
you and your potential buyers!
When I focus on me, I increase my tension

When I focus on you, I decrease my tension
Think about the telephone you use which might feel as if it weighs 20lb’s! If you
want it to literally float into your hands like a feather when it comes to making
calls, then... Pay ATTENTION to your new INTENTION and Purpose… And put
all your attention on satisfying your potential buyer’s needs and values before
your own. Your own will be satisfied much faster that way!
So, when you get up in the mornings… Instead of saying to yourself…
I need to call and close x number of people today.
Say to yourself…
I must call x number of people today to see if they have the types of
problems, I can help them solve.
Feel the difference in energy?
If you can, it’s the same energy your potential buyers will feel. Embedding your
mind and being into this Natural Selling Principal dissolves tension, friction,
resistance, and business will just pour itself toward you!
So, if the purpose of a business is to help people solve their problems, how do
you go about doing this? Obviously, you ask Questions! However, as you’ll find
out in the next chapter… Not just any kinds of questions!
Chapter 8
Natural Selling Is Asking The Right Types Of Questions At The Right Time.
If the real purpose of a business is to help potential buyers solve their problems,
then the only way you can do this is to ask relevant questions, isn’t it? Consider
this saying by Rudyard Kipling;
I keep six wise serving men, they taught me all I knew.

Their names are WHAT and WHY and WHEN and HOW and WHERE and
WHO.
Six questions. The most valuable of all your sales aids that allows you to ditch
the pitch and flip the switch to discovering first instead!
How to Present by Not Presenting!
To be clear… When I talk about asking questions, I’m not talking about any
kinds of questions. I’m certainly not referring to manipulative questions
designed to get people to say what you want them to say! If you ask these kinds
of questions - Whose answers are you likely to get - Yours or the person you're
talking with? They’ll be yours, won’t they?
And whose answers do you really want? Its their answers - Their present truth -
Their current reality that you need to hear!
Asking manipulative questions will make you appear like a salesperson who's
only interested in selling something! And if you’ve had manipulative questions
used on you, how did that make you feel? Pretty uncomfortable probably! So why
would anyone want to do this to others?
So, the questions to which I'm referring are asking the right types of Natural
Selling questions at the right time. Note I’ve emphasized the word types. It’s
not just asking questions... It’s knowing how different types of questions will
differently affect your potential buyers.
Some are Fact Finding and some are Feeling Finding Needs and Values
Centered Questions - The answers to which… Internally influence and
persuade your potential buyers to want to listen and buy from you!
Here Is What Happens!
These questions are as much for your potential buyers as they are for you,
because;
1. As they answer - They LISTEN to what they are saying
2. As they listen -They THINK about their problems in detail - You can’t think
without feeling!
3. As they think - They FEEL the discomfort of how their present situation is
affecting them right now
4. As their feeling of discomfort increases, so does the intensity of their desire

and feeling to change their present situation to what they really want and to
take action
5. As they feel the need to take action, they automatically feel they want to
take action with YOU because you cared to listen and they trust you!
That’s it! It’s no longer you persuading them… It’s THEM persuading and
committing THEMSELVES to change!
And if there is any tension in the room… It won’t be because of YOU! The
tension will be about themselves and how they feel about their present situation
right now!
There are two reasons people make changes in their lives... Desperation or
Inspiration or both!
The degree that a person will change is mostly dependent on two things:
1. The degree of discomfort he/she is feeling with their present situation in

the present moment, and...
2. The degree of desire to make a change!
This is how you ditch the pitch and present without presenting! Your potential
buyers do it for you! And it all happens in the Discovering Stage of the Natural
Selling Conversational Dialogue.
How would you like a presentation like that, where your potential buyers actually
influence and persuade themselves to want to listen to and buy from you...
Before you’ve even made your final presentation?
That has to be the ultimate in selling, doesn’t it?
After All - Who Has the History?
1. Who knows what they want and why they really want it?
They do!
2. Who knows what they’ve done about it and whether it’s worked or not?
They do!
3. Who knows how they feel about their problems?
They do!
4. Who knows if they are prepared to do what it takes to get what they want?
They do!
5. So, who has most of the answers?

They do!
And if you ask them with the right intention and are prepared to listen - They’ll tell
you! You see, your potential buyers and you each bring a key component to the
Natural Selling Conversational Dialogue.
• They have the history and know their unique outer logical and inner
personal emotional needs and values
• You know what specific features of your solution to focus on that will
satisfy those needs as they tell you
• You will also know how to customize and present those particular features
as Advantages and Benefits that have logical and emotional personal
meaning to them - Based on everything they told you!
Your Potential buyers will actually willingly lay out their unique Logical and
Emotional Buying Blueprint and tell YOU how to understand them and help you
to help them buy from you! THIS is how you ‘sell’ with integrity and without
tension!
So instead of bowling your potential buyers over with presentational guesswork -

Why not ask them, and fit your presentation precisely to what they need instead
of guessing? It’s only when your potential buyers feel you understand and
respect where THEY come from, are they likely to listen to you and want to buy
from you.
The Natural Selling Conversational Dialogue Framework
Stephen Covey says in his book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, “Seek
first to understand and then be understood!” Natural Selling Conversational
Dialogue is the path to get you there!
Asking the right types of questions at the right time to help them buy, happens
mostly in the Discovering Stage of the 5 different Stages of the Conversational
Dialogue. You can download an outline of the Natural Selling Conversational
Dialogue Framework by clicking on the link below.
This is a helicopter view of your voyage of discovery to get both you and your
potential buyers from where they are now, to where they want to go comfortably
and effectively!
Action: Print the Dialogue Framework Below
As you can see, there are 7 different types of questions in the Discovering Stage
- Some are logical and others emotional.
These different types of questions are designed to;
1. Immediately draw your potential buyers to you as the Trusted Advisor
2. Quickly establish the know, like and trust factor
3. Demonstrate you’re clearly the right person to speak with as you appear to
want to understand and help them, not sell them!
You’ll notice that, unlike standard sales models where the presentation is made
at the beginning followed by pressure to buy, usually resulting in resistance…
The Presenting Stage comes later and now becomes where you bring together
everything that was agreed on previously, both psychologically and logically!
In fact, it’s during the Connecting and Discovering Stages where you establish
the immediate rapport and relationship, and where your potential buyer makes
the decision to buy.
The Commitment to buy is merely an extension of the Discovering Stage - A final

natural step. The Discovering stage is your blueprint to help them willingly
reveal their logical and unique emotional blueprint!
It all happens, well - Naturally!
Let’s go deeper.
The Natural Selling Conversational Dialogue Framework
The 5 Stages of a Natural Selling Conversational Dialogue
1. Connecting Stage
Connecting Questions
2. Discovering Stage Background Questions

L
Needs Awareness Questions I
Needs Development Questions S
Responsibility Questions
T
Solution Questions E
Consequence Questions N
Qualifying Questions
3. Transitioning Stage
Transition Questions
4. Presenting &
Supporting Stage Presentation, Agreement
5. Committing Stage
Commitment Questions
Myths About Asking Questions!
Now, you might have been taught that asking questions is intrusive and can be
rude - Nothing could be further from the truth! Any stigma like this usually stems
from early childhood indoctrination!
For example, what are the first two things children are taught in their first couple
of years? To walk and to talk, aren’t they? Then they’re instructed to - Sit down
and be quiet!
Being curious is how we learn, and in Natural Selling Conversational Dialogue

particularly… It’s how we help others learn as well! Doing it with the correct
intention and a focus on Purpose, not Personal Agenda, is what puts you into
the upper echelons of selling.
Top 10 Reasons For Asking Questions!
Good questions are essential to the analysis and diagnosis of your potential
buyer’s problems, long before presenting your solution. They are the
salesperson's stethoscope to tune into a person’s heart and mind. Like a
stethoscope, they reveal the internal heartbeat of your potential buyers.
Natural Selling questions are neuroscientifically designed to help your

potential buyers reveal their logical and emotional needs and values… Thus
allowing them to think more deeply about taking action and changing their
present situation. No longer are you regarded as an annoying salesperson!
Here’s why!
1. Questions Involve and Paint a Picture
Asking questions allows your potential buyers to feel part of the process and not
feel as if they are being sold - Telling does not!
People buy for their reasons, not yours!
Their answers to your questions allow them to paint a unique picture of

everything they want or don’t want, and why they want it, or don’t want it. If you
listen, you get to see their picture.
It may also be the first time they’ve ‘seen’ their picture in a long time. Their
reward is they get to see their picture again - Your reward is, you get the credit!
You help them feel and see problems they never thought they had, which
increases their curiosity and desire to move forward!
2. Questions Internally Motivate
The desire to take action increases as your Fact Finding and Feeling Finding
questions are answered.
3. Questions Replace Closing Techniques
You don’t have to “close” someone who has decided early on that you’re the one
they want to trust!
4. Questions Replace Overcoming Objections Techniques
You don’t need to overcome resistance when they overcome it themselves.
5. Questions Dissolve Anxiety, Tension and Friction
For you, because the focus is off you and on them - For them because they don’t
feel they are being sold.
6. Questions Create Value In You And Everything You Represent
If you want to create value in yourself and everything you represent - Don’t talk
about you and everything you represent! Instead, Allow THEM to talk about
THEM, and everything THEY represent.
7. Questions Remove Price Resistance
The greater the desire to resolve a problem with the correct solution - The less
important is the cost!
8. Questions Make You an Important Part of The Solution
People don’t buy so much because they understand the solution - They buy
because they trust you do!
9. Questions Prevent You from Guessing What to Present!
Presenting is no longer a guessing game - It’s precise and personal. Your

potential buyers will let you know what features are important and how to present
them as specific advantages and benefits.
10. Questions Educate
Your knowledge can be an asset that gets in your way! Instead of telling what
you know - Turn what you know into asking questions.
When you say it - They can doubt you
When they say it - It’s true!
Their answers let them educate themselves and learn directly and indirectly.
And finally - Questions put you in control - Not for power and manipulation, but
for you to easily keep the conversation on track. The irony being - Your potential
buyers feel in control as well!
So, now you know;
1. How to confidently approach, follow up and talk with anyone, anywhere,

any time, without tension
2. How to let your potential buyers willingly and happily tell you what and how
you should present
3. How to let them persuade THEMSELVES to want to listen to and buy from
you...
The question is… Do you think at this point at least 50% of any anxiety you might
have is now gone, and connecting with potential buyers and clients, will be
relaxed, productive and your success as a salesperson will dramatically
increase?
If so, let’s see how to remove the remaining 50% - If any, shall we?
Chapter 9
Natural Selling Is Listening To What Is Being Meant As Well As What Is

Being Said
Knowing how to listen and what to listen for, are the two most valuable
professional and life skills you can learn and master. Being heard and
understood is a rare commodity and virtually nonexistent, especially in the world
of selling.
The mere act of listening with the intent to understand and not with the
intent to reply, (Thanks, Stephen Covey!) draws and bonds people to you like a
magnet. It allows you to hear, feel, see, understand and… Most critically - How to
accurately respond to their logical and emotional needs.
Active listening forces you to say less and allows your potential buyers to say
more while influencing themselves to want to buy from you!
You’ve noticed I’ve emphasized two words – Meant and Said.
1. Said is your potential buyer’s expressing their Outer Logical Needs -

WHAT they want.
2. Meant is them expressing their Inner Logical and Unique Inner Personal
Subjective/ Emotional Needs and Values - WHY they want what they want.
You discovered this previously, and how asking the right types of Fact Finding
and Feeling Finding questions will let the both of you see, hear and feel what is
essentially their Unique Buying Blueprint.
The Challenge of Listening
One of the challenges about listening is that most people are never taught how.
From an early stage in our lives, what were we taught to do to get on in life –
How to listen or how to express ourselves? Mostly, how to express ourselves,
weren’t we?
For proof of this - Sit in a coffee shop and listen discreetly to people having a
conversation at another table. You’ll likely hear more than one conversation
going on at the same time with both people misinterpreting each other, making
assumptions, butting in or rarely understanding where the other person is coming
from!
To paraphrase Robert McCloskey;
“I know you believe you understand what you think I said,

but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant!”
It’s the same with so many salespeople. If they listen at all. They;
1. Tend to listen selectively with the intent to reply
2. Listen for what they want to hear
3. Spend their time thinking about what they want to say or ask next, missing
what is really being said
The real art of persuasion in selling and letting people take themselves in the
direction you would like them to go - Is in listening! Listening is free, doesn’t cost
a penny and your potential buyers will return the compliment ten-fold.
Listen to them and they will listen to you!
And good listening habits can be learned as you’ll see.
How Much Time Should You Spend Listening?
100%! You might ask - How do you effectively listen 100% of the time? It’s really
quite simple!
You Can Listen Without Thinking!
Here’s why and how;
1. Remembering the right types of Natural Selling questions…

Means you won’t have to think about them
2. Listening carefully to the answers you get to previous questions are like
signposts on a road…
Means you won’t have to think about what to ask next
3. Listening openly for and responding to answers to questions you never

asked...
Means you won’t have to think about asking those questions either!
4. Turning your own relevant experience and knowledge into asking

questions…
Means you’ll use questions from the knowledge you already have
What You’re Listening For
You’re listening for and responding to questions that reveal their;
1. Outer Logical Problems and Needs
2. Inner Personal Logical Needs and Values
3. Unique Inner Personal Subjective/Emotional Needs and Values
Test Your Personal Listening Habits!
Find out for yourself how well you listen by answering the Listening Assessment
questions below before continuing. They could be really revealing! If you
answered “NO” to all of these questions, you are one of a kind!!
Listening Exercise
Here is a short test that will give you an idea of your own listening habits:
When you’re listening to someone,
Do you think about other things while you’re keeping track of the Yes No
conversation?
Do you think about what you’re going to say next? Yes No
Do you listen with the intent to reply rather than with the intent to Yes No
understand?
Do you break in with your own ideas before the other person has Yes No
finished talking?
Do you listen primarily for facts rather than ideas? Yes No
Do you ‘tune out’ to things that you feel will be too difficult to Yes No
understand?
Do you try to make it appear you’re paying attention when you’re Yes No
not?
Do certain words or phrases prejudice you so that you don’t Yes No
listen objectively?
Do your thoughts turn to other things when you believe a Yes No
speaker will have nothing particularly interesting to say?
Do you finish other people’s sentences? Yes No
Can you tell from a person’s appearance and delivery that Yes No
he/she won’t have anything important to say?
Are you easily distracted by outside sights and sounds? Yes No
If you answered ‘NO’ to all of these questions, you are one of a kind! From an
early age, most of us are taught to express ourselves to get our points across.
Very few of us are taught how to listen. Good listening habits can be learned.
The Power of Listening
While listening can take effort and can be a little tiring if you’re not used to it, it
gets easier over time as you train your ears and your mind. Listen with your heart
as well as your mind! The rewards of doing so are outstanding.
1. Listening bonds you to people and dissolves any defensiveness
2. You can listen people into listening to you
3. You can listen people into buying from you!
4. Listening forces you to slow down before trotting out quick solutions
5. Slowing down means you ask more interesting questions
Listening is a gift you give! The more you listen, and the more you suspend your
Personal Agenda, the more creative and meaningful you become to the other
person when you present your solution.
How to Listen Effectively
There are many ways you can be effective at listening to people. Here are a few
of them. Use them in your personal communication as well. You’ll be surprised at
how much more interesting you’ll become to your friends, family and associates!
Be Present
Being present means;
• Staying in the moment - Giving your 100% undivided attention
• Listening with the intent to understand, instead of listening with the intent
to reply
• Listening openly - Instead of listening selectively for the things you want to
hear
• Keeping a clear mind to listen to and remember their answers - Instead of

thinking about what you’re going to say or ask next
Two Truths: Many people carry Two Truths about themselves - Their social
truth and their real truth. Sometimes their social truth - The one they want others
to hear, doesn’t always match their real truth about themselves. Explore both
sides. Peel back the answers you get, like the layers of an onion, to help them
and you find which one is more important.
Be Acknowledging
Acknowledge by feeding back, summarizing and clarifying to make sure you’re

both on the same track. Use;
• Verbal Pauses to demonstrate you’re being present - Such as… “Is that
right,” “Oh, I see,” “I see what you mean,” “Hmm!”, “let me see if I
understand you,”...
• Non-Verbal Actions, such as good eye contact, nodding your head and
pausing before answering a question
• Their words and phrases to make sure there is no misunderstanding or

misinterpretation
Be Accepting
Everyone has their own subjective reality as to how they see the world, just as
you do. Being accepting means listening;
• Without judgment. (Ask yourself - Does judging change people? It doesn’t!

All it does is demonstrate a need to judge!)
• Without assumptions
• Without prejudice
• Without reinterpretation of what they are saying based on what you think
they are saying - Because they’re not thinking what you think they think!
• Without arguing - You don’t have to agree with someone to listen to them!
Put any judgments, assumptions or prejudices you might have up on the shelf.
They’ll still be there if you need them, and if you leave them there long enough,
you might find they’ve disappeared!
Be Curious
You’ve probably heard the expression - If you want to be interesting, then be

interested!
Be Comfortable With Silence
Use the silence to allow the other person to think about and answer your
questions without interruption. Being silent is not a technique or a closing trick -
It’s simply common courtesy and it’s attractive as well as persuasive!
Give your potential buyers time to reflect on and surface their own answers. After
you ask a question…
• Be quiet and internally still
• Do not answer your own questions, make suggestions or change the

subject
Sales are lost by salespeople who answer their own questions because they
divert the conversation in a direction that leads to nowhere. If you're still
attempting to get the answers you want, that's all they will be, your answers; not
theirs! You’ll find out, it doesn't matter what their answers are - They are what
they are, and they are all easy to respond to!
The reason many salespeople don't like silence is because of their fear of losing
control. The opposite is actually true - Being quiet, internally and externally, puts
you more in control - Especially of yourself! And besides - As Senator Dominick
Barber so eloquently put it;
You ain't learning nothing while you're talking.
The mind is like a computer - Sometimes it needs to search through the hard
drive and sort itself out before coming up with an answer. When it does it’s quite
usual to receive deeper information than you had thought possible and many
times you’ll be told things they would never tell anyone else.
Silence is never more golden than when you hold it

long enough to get all the facts and feelings before you speak
Listening, being silent and patiently keeping your mind still, opens up infinite
possibilities!
Stop Thinking!
People don’t think what you think they think - Your thinking they do can get in
your way! For example, someone might say; This is expensive!
Instead of thinking, this is an objection to be overcome, ask;
When you say expensive, may I ask what you mean by expensive?
You’ll hear 5 different answers from 5 different people!
Their answers allow you to explore their unique perspective of what they mean,
and it becomes a natural part of your Conversational Dialogue, not separate from
it, as in the standard sales model.
Here’s another thing you can do…
• Stop thinking you might be asked a question you don’t want to hear,
because it’s almost certain it will be asked!
Why? Because unconsciously you’ll use words and language that will cause it to
happen!
It’s why some salespeople complain about always being asked difficult questions
while other salespeople never get asked! It’s because they’re prepared and then,
they let them go and don’t expect them! To borrow an Aikido expression –
Prepare for everything. Expect Nothing!
You will too!
Chapter 10
Natural Selling is Feeding Back What You Think You Heard
Feeding back what you think you heard and what was meant, is about clarifying
to make sure you keep your focus on your potential buyers' needs, wants, and
desires. It’s continually understanding and making sure throughout your Natural
Selling Conversational Dialogue you’re on the right track, and if you’re not, how
to get back on it.
This is critical, especially;
• While responding to questions, comments or concerns
• During the Discovering Stage, as it demonstrates you’re paying attention

and listening
• During the final Presenting and Committing Stages, when you summarize,
present and support how your solution is the best one based on their
unique outer and inner needs
Feedback with comments like these…
Let me see if I’ve got this right…

So, is what you’re saying…?
It doesn’t matter whether you got it right or wrong, what matters to the other
person is that you’re demonstrating you’re listening and attempting to
understand. They’ll quite happily steer you toward or back on the right track
without judgment! It’s all part of the collaborative equation.
The ultimate feedback is at the end when you make your precise and winning
presentation and get commitment based on your understanding of everything you
were told. Asking for the order becomes a natural part of and conclusion to your
conversation, not the uncomfortable pivot that so many salespeople dread.
It’s easy and comfortable - Two minds mutually agreeing on what has been
already discussed and logically and emotionally in the Discovering Stage.
Chapter 11
Chapter 11 - What’s Next?
So those are the 5 Natural Selling Principles of helping more people buy your
products or services without any tension and based on integrity and authenticity.
When you stop for a moment to look at and think about the changes in your
thinking you’ve made so far... You’ll see how these lasting changes can
dramatically and consistently improve your sales results.
As you’ve discovered, helping people willingly persuade themselves to buy from

you, is far more effective than using classical sales techniques to pressure them!
And by now… You already know if Natural Selling is the right approach for you,
and you’re ready to continue the momentum and apply what you’ve learned that
will turn your potential buyers into REAL customers much faster.
And whether you’re new to the profession or a sales veteran, the next step is to
take action and apply what you have discovered here, isn’t it?
Taking action obviously is key - Without action, nothing changes, does it?
If this is true, you now have three choices;
1. Do nothing!
2. Work out how to do it yourself

or...
3. Take my Fast Track Online Course and have me help you, step by step,
move quickly forward and get the results you want!
Personally, I’d like to help you continue and apply this transformational
breakthrough I created over 24 years ago… which is why I created this complete
easy to understand and easy to implement Online Natural Selling Course called.
How to ‘Sell’ The Way People Buy

The Art & Science of Listening People into Buying
Using Natural Selling Conversational Dialogue
And It’s only $297!
It’s the most complete training course I’ve ever written!
I’ve held nothing back… And… it’s available now for downloading to turn your
new thinking into immediate action!
Note: This is the exact same course I charge $5,000 upwards for one-on-one
training and coaching.
And if you’re wondering why I can offer it to you for only $297… It’s because
you’re not paying for the time it would take me to personally train, coach and
mentor you one-on-one from mindset change to practically apply what you have
learned - Though that option is still open to you!
Have a look at a sample of lesson 4 – The Discovering Stage, for you to get a
taste of what to expect
So if you’re looking for YOUR Practical Blueprint to help your potential buyers
willingly reveal and layout for you (and for themselves)…
THEIR exact and unique logical and emotional buying blueprint which will
tell you exactly what and how to present and make a winning presentation every
time – this is it!
I walk you through, step by step, how to have your potential buyers want to lean
in and persuade themselves to listen to and buy from you as their Trusted
Advisor, without any tension, friction or resistance.
It’s literally the art and science of helping potential buyers buy and much, much
more - And so many of my students are testament to this!
It’s an approach that has successfully scaled my client’s sales upwards from
$50K and year to over $3M a year.
You’ll get the inner and outer practical secrets of how to successfully apply;
• The 7 different types of logical and emotional/subjective questions to

ask in the Discovering Stage, including what they are, why you're asking
them, and how they dissolve resistance before it can happen
• The 5 Values Centered Questions that quickly reveal the unique Logical
and Emotional Buying Blueprint of your potential buyers - No more
guessing!
• 3 Important Primary Qualifying Objectives - They’re probably not what you
think!
• 10 ways to start resistance dissolving effective Natural Selling

Conversational Dialogues without any tension
• The 9 essential sales skills that probably no one has ever told you about
• What to ask, when you ask, how to ask, what you’re listening for and how
to respond
And a bonus chapter called:
• How to effectively respond to questions or concerns… Without using

resistance causing overcoming objection techniques
Here's what to do next.
Click on the button below and the complete practical Natural Selling
Conversational Dialogue course will be on its way to your inbox for only $297.
Here is more of what you’ll get and what it will do for you. How would you like to
be able to…
• Craft your ultimate interest creating Personal Value Impact Statement that
leaves elevator speeches in the basement?
• Be invited to talk about or present your solution?
• Understand the real meaning of Features, Advantages and Benefits, and
how to effectively present them every time, so that they personally mean
something to the person you’re talking with?
• Present without presenting - Letting your questions do the presenting for

you?… And much, much more...
When you stop to think about it… $297 is a drop in the ocean isn’t it, to
accelerate making a thousand times more than that, like many of my students
and other trainers I’ve trained over the years, who easily achieve this every year.
And seriously, if change is important to you, and you’re ready to change right
now - I’m one of the very few people who can put you on the fast track to help
you do that.
PS: I hope the book has given you a different perspective on selling and I look
forward to continuing this journey together.
Support
To contact me:
Send an email to info@naturalselling.com
You can also connect with me on:
Facebook
https://www.facebook.com/naturalselling
Linkedin
https://www.linkedin.com/in/naturalselling
Alignable
https://www.alignable.com/vancouver-bc/natural-selling-sales-training
I look forward to working with you.

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Chapter 1. The Supporting NeuroScience Page 6

Chapter 2: What Is The Greatest Fear? Page 10

Chapter 3. The Fear of Rejection is NOT The Problem! Page 15

Chapter 4. The 3 Main Causes of Rejection & Objections Page 17

Chapter 5. Remove, Reframe, Rebuild! Page 24

Chapter 6. Natural Selling Principle #1 Page 27

Chapter 7. Natural Selling Principle #2 Page 35

Chapter 8. Natural Selling Principle #3 Page 43

Chapter 9. Natural Selling Principle #4 Page 55

Chapter 10. Natural Selling Principle #5 Page 66

Chapter 11. What's Next Page 69

Hello, and welcome to this short and life-changing

Whether you’re brand new to selling or a seasoned veteran...This book might

Here’s to that success!

Neuroscientists and behavioral researchers in the science of sales and marketing

The choice is yours as to which way that switch is flipped!

• I’m suspicious and don’t trust this person

• This person is a threat

• This person is going to deceive me

The Prefrontal Cortex

The prefrontal cortex has to do with personality expression, social judgments

Taking with potential buyers using Natural Selling Conversational Dialogue,

• Lights up their prefrontal cortex

It lets you communicate at a level where;

• REAL and immediate rapport and relationship building takes place

Instead of being regarded cautiously - You’re looked on and respected as the

When I ask salespeople and networkers…

Tense? Tight? Feeling inadequate? Fearful - Perhaps? Holding back from

So, what about the other 83-85%?

And there is - A Proven Neuroscientific Supported Effective Way! As I’ll explain.

New Rules – New Model

So instead of being trapped in the standard “Numbers Game” and techniques

It’s the same with selling!

We tend to be very solution-oriented in this society, don’t we? This is especially

#1 Cause of Resistance - Presenting Too Soon

#2 Cause of Resistance - Using Closing Techniques

Using overcoming objection techniques is a result of thinking that your potential

• You’re not listening

• You’re not interested in what they have to say or ask

• What they have to say or ask is not important

Brushing aside and disrespectfully responding to questions, comments, or

It’s Crazy, isn’t it?

So, the big question is…

Natural Selling salespeople...

1. Don’t guess when presenting!

2. Don’t close early and often

3. Never respond to questions, concerns or comments as resistance or

1. Are experts in what they know, what they want, and…

The answer is to…

1. REMOVE the techniques

2. REFRAME your thinking

3. REBUILD your approach and how you talk with people

5 Natural Selling Principles - Your New Mindset Foundation

Why Principles And Not Techniques?