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 Lord Alpha
BLOOD WITCH CHRONICLES
BOOK THREE
KELLY COULTER
Copyright © 2023 by Kelly Coulter

All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and
retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
 Contents

Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Epilogue

About the Author

Also by Kelly Coulter
 Prologue

Robert
Garrick Manor 1558

C aitlyn hummed beneath her breath, the light tone in contrast to the anxiety swirling within me.
“I do not think this is the right way to do things, petal.”
She looked up at me from where she stood at her table, in the room I had made for her for
exactly this reason. Creating magic. But this was not what I had in mind when I tied my life to hers in
marriage.
Caitlyn was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. When I first saw her, I knew that my life
would be irrevocably changed. Her spirit was like nothing I experienced before from the prim and
proper ladies back home in London. The day I left the manor with my father, I remembered handing
her a yellow rose, a symbol of everlasting friendship, and a promise to return for her. The apples of
her cheeks had blushed pink, but her eyes stayed fixed on mine in challenge. And she had held me to
that promise, forsaking all others from the human village nearby, waiting for me to ask the elder for
her hand in marriage. We had been young, but there was no mistaking the love and admiration I held
for the woman in front of me.
“You promised me you would love me forever, Robert. Is this not what you want?” Atlas’s large
body lay prone beside her, his breaths calm and even in the face of his mistress’s ire. “We have
Lauren now, do you not want to be there for her too?”
Guilt overrode my worry at the coming night. I should want this, this is what most people dreamed
of. No sickness, no ageing. A lifetime with the ones I love, an eternity with the woman who held my
heart, building a family together. Yet I was but a man, raised in the eyes of the church, my instincts
were screaming at me that God would not want this to happen. That I should be happy with the natural
order of things—going against His will felt unnatural.
“We discussed this, husband. You said you wanted this.”
I had said that, but I never thought for a second that it would be something she could pull off. I
never thought it would be possible. Especially not for someone of her skill set.
She had always been reckless with her power. Practising way past her skill level despite being
told by the elders not to. The fact that she had permission for this from the coven leader was a strange
thing. Yet I had no reason not to trust her word.
She skipped around the room gathering herbs and tying them off with string to keep them separated
from each other. She tied neat little bows around each bundle and placed them in her satchel along
with her grimoire.
“Come, Atlas, we will prepare the site for tonight.” Her familiar raised gracefully from his
position and prowled after her, his bright amber eyes watching me with an almost human gaze. I have
never understood their connection, even though I knew that they could feel each other, could
communicate in some way. Caitlyn had tried to explain their bond to me before, and it felt wrong that
I would be the one coming between their union that had been predestined since before I even knew
that blood witches existed.
My worry settled on me like a mantel. I left the room that I had built especially for my wife’s craft
and went a floor lower to a room where I always found my peace.
I had designed our bedchamber so that all our needs were met. There was a dressing area with a
vanity tucked off into one corner. The large bed that took up almost an entire wall was surrounded
from each post by red silk that cocooned us in our own little world each night. To the side of our bed
was a bassinet that currently sat empty, but it was where our daughter slept - beside us - in safety and
comfort, and in a place that we both knew she would be safe. Often during the darkness, I was
awoken by her cries of hunger. It fascinated me that Cait arose from her slumber and nursed our child
herself.
Many of the aristocracy - my own mother included - had hired wetnurses to feed their babies, also
requiring staff on hand at all times to manage the household and any young.
My wife had always seen to everything herself, with the exception of her coven, who often helped
during the daylight hours. They passed Lauren around, carrying her from one part of the village to
another, never letting her be put down.
It was on these days that I seldom got to see my own child, I was not welcome in the village of
blood witches. Morag and the other elders frowned upon our marriage, they did not accept that
Caitlyn was in love with me and choose to be by my side. They had decided very early on in our
courtship that I was here to take her from them. No matter how many times I had spoken to them of my
desire only to love her and cherish her for the length of time I had on this earth, they still felt that I
would forbid her from practising her craft, effectively making her mortal.
I cannot deny that the thought of Caitlyn staying at the manor permanently and forgoing the ancient
ways was appealing. We would grow old together; our sons would inherit the titles that I had
acquired from my own father, our grandchildren would never want for anything.
But I had met and fallen in love with Cait the way she was. I know that being a blood witch was
her life… and it would eventually be my daughter’s too. I could never ask that of her.
Besides, this plan she had concocted to see Atlas pass on his immortality to me was imminent,
and I needed to be prepared.

Darkness had fallen hours ago. I waited in the clearing, my thick coat keeping the chill at bay while I
waited for Caitlyn to finish her preparations. She was sitting in a thicket on her knees, her once blue
dress covered in mud and drops of blood. Her arms were spread wide, crimson drops dripping
between her fingers; her graceful neck arched as her face turned upwards towards the blackness of the
night sky.
The blood witches had always known the new moon to be the most powerful time, a new start and
the symbol of life - like the lineage that coursed through their bodies.
 But for me and many others, the pitch black of the night during this time was always a period
when evil things could happen. My mother - God rest her soul - had always said that wicked things
happened at this ungodly hour, and I always struggled to deny her superstitions when I was with my
wife—especially since these ideas had been told to me for years before this.
Atlas paced up and down in front of Caitlyn, his fur bristling at the intensity of magic that filled
the air. The power was cloying that even I, as a human, could feel that whatever she was doing right
now was strong.
“Come here, my love.” Caitlyn waved me towards her side. “Lay down here.” The leaves
cushioned me as I lay down on the forest floor.
Atlas lay on her opposite side, so that she was in between us, her crimson-stained hands resting
lightly on each of us. She picked up a wooden bowl full of crushed and broken things ground into a
pulp that I did not wish to know their origins. With her blood added to the mix, it looked like a dark
brown mess. Her fingers scooped up the congealed concoction and pasted it around my face, dragging
it down my throat until the majority of it rested above my heart. She did the same with Atlas, who lay
on his side, a trail of brown streaking through his fur to rest upon the small locket of white fur that
covered his own heart.
My breathing grew laboured as she placed her hands over the largest stain, my heart thumping
beneath her palm as she rubbed me lightly, trying to soothe me.
I was raised to never show fear, that people would always take advantage of any weaknesses. As
a Lord and gentleman, this was something instilled in me since I was a young boy destined to take
over the reins from my father. Yet I could not help the intense worry churning within me. The longer I
laid there beneath my wife’s hand, the harder it was to remain still… and trust her.
“Petal, I do not think this is the right thing to do,” I interrupted, my hand engulfing her tiny one.
“We must stop.”
“It is too late, it is almost…” her whispered voice trailed off just as Atlas let out a mournful
howl, his muzzle raised to the sky in anguish. His large body convulsed beneath Caitlyn’s hold.
“Atlas?” Her voice trembled as she gripped his fur between her fingers. “This is not supposed to
happen,” she muttered to herself.
“Stop this, Caitlyn. At once.” I crawled over her, desperate to ease the pain of the beast that
trembled in pain.
“I… I cannot. I do not know how… I…”
I glared at her as I lifted him into my arms, his canine face resting upon my shoulder. “You said
that Morag gave you instructions,” I demanded,. “You lied to me.”
Hurt and shame looked back at me in equal measure, what in God’s name had she done?
“Where are you taking him? Robert!” she shouted at my retreating back, but I was too angry to
even acknowledge her pleas. I should have done this when she first came to me with the idea. I should
have spoken to the crone.
Atlas tensed in my hold, his head shooting back, his lips pulling away revealing his sharp fangs.
His heavy pants sounded around his growls of pain until he sagged in my grasp.
I placed him on the ground before me. “Atlas.” I stroked the dark fur along his neck. “Atlas, wake
up.” He was silent, the only noise the dashing footsteps of my wife as she collapsed before me, tears
streaking her beauty.
“He’s not breathing,” she gasped. Her ceremonial dagger clutched tightly within her fist, she made
to cut herself one more time, but I grabbed her hand before she could.
“Your magic has done enough for one night,” I gritted out. “Look at him, he barely breathes.” The
beast's side rose faintly as he rested on the forest floor, his eyes clenched tightly. “You must know that
there would be consequences to…” I coughed, a sharp pain shooting through my chest. “...to using
such…” I grabbed at my throat, struggling to get air in and out.
“Robert?” Fear laced my wife’s voice as she watched me. But my own fear was taking
precedence. I could not breathe, I could only feel the sharp lancing pains like lightning that were
travelling through my entire being. Rising on unsteady feet, I leaned against the closest tree, my hands
digging into the rough bark trying to find something to hold onto through the agony.
My wife’s cries were distant through the thundering in my ears, her hands felt like ice through the
layers of my clothing, her touch adding more pain to the sensations traversing my body. I shoved her
hands from me, needing her away from me.
My skin was fire, my body melting. I could almost feel my flesh tearing beneath the material that
covered me. I grabbed at my clothes dragging them from me until the blessed cool air caressed my
burning body. But it was not enough, the heat was consuming me. It was inside me and no matter what
I did, it would not stop.
“Make it stop, goddamn it,” I yelled at her cowering before me. “What did you do to me?” I did
not recognise my own voice. The grating and the growls that erupted were inhuman. They were a
violation of the natural order. And it was exactly what I was afraid of.
I was being punished by Him for our arrogance, thinking that we could change what I was to be
something different - something unnatural.
Scents assaulted me. Lights blinded me. Thunder sounded in my head while the lightning
continued to ravage my body. My shouts for mercy went unheard. My pleading to stop this torment
mingled with my screams of agony.
It was as if every bone in my body was breaking, the cracks and snaps drowned out my wife’s
screams, until the sounds were deafening and I had to escape.
But my legs failed me, and I collapsed to the floor next to Atlas’ prone body, my hands growing
and reshaping until they resembled the paws of the beast beside me.
What was I becoming?
It was my last lucid thought before a violent haze covered my vision, and a wave of heat swarmed
me…
Pain.
Trapped.
Must flee.
Torture.
Hate.
Betrayal.
Hunger.
So hungry…
 One

Lily
Present day

T he constant dripping joined the sound of the creaking floorboards from upstairs. Dust fell from
the ceiling with each stomp of my captor’s boots. I had long learned to keep my eyes lowered
when they traipsed around above me so that the dust didn't get in my eyes.
At the beginning, particles of grit would lodge in the back of my eyes causing pain whenever I
blinked. I could feel the invasion of dirt yet I couldn’t wipe my face in this position. I just had to rely
on my eyes watering and washing away the grime naturally.
If only my situation was as easy as that. A little bit of water washing away my problems.
I shifted around on the lumpy mattress trying to get comfortable, there were hardly any positions I
could lie in these days, so I had to make do with the limited movement I had.
They let me out for an hour each day so that I could stretch my legs and use the bathroom. At first,
I would try and find a way out, but those days were long gone.
I shuffled around so that I was laying on my other side, my swollen stomach resting on the bed.
The skin on my wrist rubbed against the chains, the metal digging into my flesh. It used to hurt more,
but after months of being trapped in this rotten basement, the skin had scarred and toughened. The
chafing only irritates me now.
I listened for my kidnappers, waiting for her to come down and let me out for a bit. It was about
that time and my bladder was about to burst. Being heavily pregnant and a prisoner were not two
things that I would ever recommend being at the same time.
It was always the woman who came down to let me out. At first, the man came too, but he started
getting handsy with me when my belly started showing as if he was entitled to touch me. His wife got
annoyed with him and barred him from coming down after that - thank God! His hands always ended
‘accidentally’ slipping to touch my breasts, and his lecherous look made me queasy. But despite his
wandering hands, he had never taken advantage of me.
It used to be my biggest fear when they first shoved me into their waiting van. Of course, when I
first saw the blacked-out vehicle, I had immediately thought that it was a paedophile’s dream van
with its strategically splashed mud covering the number plates and the dark vinyl covering the rear
windows. But I was from a leafy little town in Essex, where stay-at-home mums drove personalised
4X4’s, and entitled little boys and girls carried generational names. It was your regular middle-class
haven. Although the vehicle had been out of place, I carried no worry for myself walking home to my
apartment in the evening after my shift at the nursery.
And my complacency had been my downfall.
Now, here I was, trapped in a filthy basement with animals beyond my wildest nightmares
keeping me chained in some messed-up plan to become parents.
They had told me everything the day I had woken up after being bitten. I didn’t remember the
aftermath except the pain as I blacked out for most of it. I recall the feel of his teeth in my leg all too
well. The panting and dripping saliva from his fangs as he watched the poison take a hold of me. His
glowing eyes shone with lust as my bones cracked and reshaped into something unfamiliar, until I
couldn’t stay awake through the agony.
I woke up chained to this bed months ago, a foreign presence taken residence within me… and it
wasn’t my child.
My senses had heightened. I could hear every whisper of the wind through the thin panes of glass.
The smell of manure on the breeze had me guessing that I was not in Kansas anymore. This was
somewhere out in the country - farming territory.
My ears perked at the muttering outside the basement door, she was coming down. But there was a
new voice with her, another person.
Who did she have with her?
I had been only eight weeks pregnant when I was taken. I must be almost due with the size of me. I
had seen no doctor or been checked out. I had no idea if the shift had done anything to my baby, but I
knew it was there. The baby was kicking like a football player within me, he or she was alive and
almost ready to go. And when that happened, I only had Tweedledee and Tweedledum to help me
through my very first birthing experience.
“I’m tellin’ ya, Jen, it’s gonna work this time. I can feel it.”
Hazel clomped in with her muddy wellies and overalls, a strange woman trailing along behind
her, with a wary look on her average face. She smelled like us, earthy and animalistic, she was a
Lycan too then? The strange woman's fake Ugg boots were collapsing at the sides, they were pulled
up over the bottoms of her worn jeans. They didn’t look fashionably worn, like she bought them that
way, they just looked like she had owned them for a really long time. The only difference between her
and Hazel was that this new person was clean. The couple who owned this property that I was
shackled to were messy and unhygienic. This lady took care of herself despite not having much to her
name.
“What is this, Hazel?” she mumbled as she stared at me warily.
I rattled my chains in annoyance at being the centre of attention. “I need to use the toilet.”
“You always gotta pee these days. Calm yourself, I’ll let you go in a minute.” Hazel stood over
me, her arms crossed and a look of pride on her face. “Look at her Jen, she shifted and everythin’.
Her baby is still alive, you can hear his heartbeat.”
“Hazel, what did you do?”
“I did what we’ve always wanted, Jenny. I made it happen, finally.” Her arms dropped to her
sides. “We’ve waited decades for this. I knew it. I knew it would only take the right person and we
would finally have our baby. We deserve this, Billy and me, we been waiting. We’re good people.
We’ll raise this baby right!”
“I know, I know.” The other woman had her hands out, trying to calm Hazel down, but she kept
her worried eyes shifting back to me. I couldn’t help it, a tiny spark of hope flickered to life inside
me. Could it be that this stranger disapproves of Hazel and Billy’s route to parenthood? “You totally
deserve to be parents. I was just going to say that she probably shouldn’t be down in the basement,
especially when she looks ready to pop any day now.”
Perhaps not. My little light of hope withered and died.
Hazel’s red-faced tirade died with the other woman’s concern. “When she’s had this one, we’ll
try and put another pup inside her. You can have the next one.” She gloated.
“Me? Really?”
What the hell!
“Unless she dies in childbirth, then we’ll just hafta find you another one. Don’t worry, Jen, you’ll
be a mum in no time.”
“I think that I would actually have to consent to that. And I didn’t even give you permission to turn
me into this disgusting thing,” I gritted out.
The stranger scuffed her dirty boots into the dusty cement floor, looking everywhere now, except
at me.
“Pah, you shut yer trap,” spat Hazel. “Ain’t nothin’ disgusting about what we are, and if ya want
that loo break, you’d show us some respect, or I’ll let ya piss yourself.”
Respect? For kidnappers, baby snatchers and - by the sounds of it - murderers.
I had spent years saving up the money to pay for my IVF. I had slogged and penny-pinched for
fifteen years, squirrelling away every pound I could manage so that I could not only afford the IVF,
but I was mortgage free - how many 35 year olds can say that? I could quit working and retire, staying
at home to raise my baby with the luxury of knowing that I could afford it. So many couples had to
drop their tiny babies off to the nursery, their parents crying at leaving them for hours with strangers. I
never had to do that. I had made sure of it.
My life had revolved around looking after other people’s children for years, from eight until four,
five days a week. Before they had stolen me from my life, I had just been to the clinic and had my
pregnancy confirmed. I would be a mum. I was planning on handing in my notice when I went on
maternity leave and never going back.
I didn’t scrimp and save and graft my entire life so that some whack jobs could steal everything
from me. They thought they could just take my child that I had wanted so desperately. I never even
considered finding a husband and doing it the old-fashioned way. What was the point? Marriages
faded, partners left, children were left in broken homes. If I was having my own baby, I would do it
my own way, in a stable environment that would not be upset if a relationship went downhill.
My life had always been my own, and now Hazel and Billy Sallow were trying their hardest to
ruin everything.
They had already jeopardised my unborn child’s life when they forced my change. They continued
to risk my baby by keeping me in these shite conditions with barely any nourishment. There were no
prenatal vitamins, and not a vegetable in sight.
Eventually, when this child came, I would be free to attempt to get out. But not yet, not until I had
safely delivered this child. They would never hurt the baby, and obviously from their conversation
just now, they wanted to keep me around to try for baby number two.
That would not happen while I still had breath left in my body. I would not ever allow any child
to be raised in this hellhole, with these people.
Their muttering ended with the stranger leaving, her light steps barely making a sound on the old
wooden steps that led up to the main floor.
Anger blazes hot in my heart when Hazel leers at my stomach, rubbing her hands together. “Not
long now, little one.”
No, not long now.
 Two

Lily

I t was the silence that woke me. Billy’s snoring had become white noise in the past months, a
metronome that helped me get to sleep. I would count how many seconds between each inhale
and exhale—this helped in the early days when I struggled to rest.
His loud rumbles stopped and it was enough to rouse me from my doze. The creaking floorboards
above me sounded like someone trying to be whisper light on their feet on wood that had known only
stress and decay. The crickets that normally croaked outside the tiny window had fallen still. An
ominous silence that swept over me like a tidal wave.
Crash
“BILLY, GET THE GIRL.”
Hazel sounded panicked from her room above me. Pounding feet caused a rain of debris and dust
to fall from the ceiling. I stupidly breathed in at the wrong time, inhaling the grit which stuck to the
back of my throat. I coughed in irritation, burying my face in the lumpy pillow so I didn't suffocate on
their filth.
Light flooded my dark basement as Billy stomped down the rickety stairs, jangling a set of keys.
“Up. Time to get up, princess. We gotta go.”
“Go where?”
“Go. Away from here.” His hands shook as he uncuffed me, and I rubbed my sore wrists to get
some circulation back into them. “Come on. Come on,” he huffed.
His hand pinched my inner arm as he grabbed me, dragging me from the bed. “Woah, I can’t move
that fast, remember.” I waved down at my protruding stomach.
Snarls and crashes echoed around us as beasts poured in through the upstairs windows. Glass
shattered around the howling wolves intrusion.
“You have to move faster than that, they’re comin’ for ya, dammit.”
Fear unlike anything I had known so far with the Sallows rushed through me. “Why are they
coming for me?” I whispered. “I haven’t done anything!”
“They don’t want you girly, they want the pup.” He pulled me along behind him, the doorway an
ominous darkness. I could go through it with the man who had kept me a prisoner for all these months,
or I could stay here and wait for the unknown. It was the old adage, better the devil you know, that
made me waddle along behind my captor.
I had a far better chance of escaping the two old Lycans as opposed to a whole pack of them that
sounded like they were tearing the place up. I didn’t want to think about what they wanted with my
baby. I did not want to stick around to find out.
Grasping the wobbly handrail, I pulled myself up the first stair, being supported by Billy on my
other side. Chaos sounded above me as Hazel screamed her anger at the intruders, keeping them
occupied while we made our escape.
“You keep next to me, and I’ll make sure we get out of this safe…”
The light from the first floor flooded the stairwell as the door crashed against the wall, a Lycan
unlike anything I had ever seen stood tall at the doorway.
“Oh, fuck,” Billy stammered, taking a step back.
“Is that normal?”
“That… is n... not normal,” he stammered, moving away from me to let the darkness swallow him.
“Billy? What do I do?” I shuffled back myself, cradling my stomach between both hands.
The monster above watched me, his gaze calculating, looking at my stomach. With each step he
made towards me, I took one back. I stared at him, my eyes tracking his every movement as my heart
ran with the step of stallions running the charge. Narrowing his eyes, he watches me like I’m the deer
caught in headlights and right now, I feel like I am. I’m terrified, caught between two evils.
There is a darkness around him that makes me both quiver, and curious to know what lurks
beneath. I tremble, my gaze wanting to flicker towards the exit, but unable to pull them away from the
beast that prowls towards me.
I know nothing about this monster, but I do know the crazy couple that keep me bound down here
will at least protect my unborn child. It’s all they have ever wanted and despite whether I live or die,
I know my baby will be safe with the Sallows.
His large claw tipped hands, a mix of human and wolf, stretch out towards me, palm up, a plea for
me to take his hand and leave this wretched place.
But this creature is an unknown. A risk I can’t take. No matter how much this creation promises
me a safe haven;,I can't trust the menace in his dark eyes. I stumble, falling into the corner with my
hands out before me. Cowering from the darkness I do not know, hoping that by some miracle, I
survive this.
“Come with me, female,” the rasping growls of his words were distorted around his razor-sharp
teeth, that glistened in the artificial light.
He speaks?
“You get away from her!” Billy stepped in front of me, his own claws unsheathing, his face
lengthening with his shift. I had never seen a shift this close before, it was fascinating watching the
human melt away and the disgustingly satisfying crunch of bones as his body worked to transform.
“She is not yours to keep locked away in this dungeon,” he growled, before turning to me. “I will
take you and your young away from here, until the time comes for your child to be born into this
world. I will see you comfortably through this labour, and should you need me to, I will send you to
eternity peacefully.”
“What does that mean, send me to eternity?”
“It means he’ll kill you,” Billy spat,. “He wants the baby for his own.”
“What you have done is unnatural, you have taken this female and turned her against her will.”
“It’s no different to what you did to Jacob,” Billy replied.
The stranger lifted up, his lips pulling back, baring his teeth in a devilish roar of anger. “You do
not speak his name, Child-Killer.”
“We ain’t no child killers, me and my wife…”
 “Your wife, the woman who even now has a nursery covered in dust from years of disuse, who
covets that of another.”
I stepped to the side, moving away from my captor and my supposed saviour. They could entertain
themselves with insults, I had every intention of getting the hell away from all of them.
“Alpha,” a feminine voice called out from above. “the woman is restrained and awaiting your
decision.”
“Don’t you hurt my Hazel.” Billy’s voice was unrecognisable, a garbled mess of anger and rage
directed at the monster that stood before him.
“Do you choose your wife over the child she has longed for, for years?”
A spark of lucidity ignited in Billy’s eyes when he turned to me. “You’re not taking everything that
we worked for! Get back here, girl.” His claws stretched towards me. My natural instinct was to rear
back away from him, but this put me straight in the crosshairs of the monster. His hands dropped to my
shoulders, the sheer size of them taking up the entirety of my upper arm. His dark-tipped claws
brushed against the side of my breasts, that were already sensitive in my pregnant state, and I pulled
forward to get away from him. This sent me straight into the lion’s den. I was in the middle of two
brutes, and I had no way out. The exit was behind the stranger, who clutched me to him, albeit gently.
I felt no danger from the prick of his claws, he was soft but firm, whilst Billy ranted like a lunatic in
front of me, his meaty fists swiping the air.
The feminine voice sounded again, this time closer, asking for orders. Peeking around a giant
hairy arm, a stunning woman - as naked as the day she was born - stood between me and the door. She
was tall and lithe, with not a stitch of hair marring her perfect porcelain skin. She smelled of
rainwater and blossoms, with an underlying scent of corruption. She glared at me with rancour, the
spite ruining her beauty.
“Take the woman to our pack lands, she will confess her sins before her death,” the alpha
growled.
“Yes, Alpha.” Her head bowed towards him, but she kept her hate-filled gaze on me.
“You will not touch my wife,” Billy screamed, hurling himself towards us, his claws extended. In
trying to fight the beast behind me, he had completely forgotten about his vow to see my child
protected. One large arm came around me, cradling my stomach, and the other reached out, catching
my captor by the throat. His whole hand wrapped around Billy’s neck, his feet dangling from the floor
as the beast showed his true strength. He had single-handedly subdued a Lycan with merely a wave of
his hand.
“Lexi, bring the woman to me. I am not entirely cold hearted. They may say goodbye to each other
before I end their miserable existences.
Billy kicked and growled in his hold, wriggling in his attempts to get free. I stayed cocooned in
his embrace, feeling unusually safe for the first time in months.
The retreating footsteps of the woman were almost non-existent, only my sensitive hearing picked
up her annoyed huffs as she walked away.
“What will happen to me now?” I questioned. “You said that you would see me to eternity
peacefully. What does that mean?”
“We will discuss this when I have you somewhere safe.”
“And where is somewhere safe? With you, obviously. Not ‘safe’ in my own home.”
His arm tightened slightly around me, his heat an inferno at my back as I tilted my head all the way
up to look at him. His lupine face huffed above me, “There is no more ‘home’ for you, little one. Your
life - however long it lasts - is tied to us now, your pack.”
 “A… are you going to kill me?” My voice stuttered in fear at the certainty of my short life.
“I do not kill innocents. And I have never dealt with a pregnant Lycan before, I have no way of
knowing if you will survive the birth, it is almost certain that your child will not,” he rumbled. “They
never do.”
A kick within me was almost a signal from my child that they had every intention of making a liar
of the beast. His large body stiffened behind me. “You felt that too?” I whispered to him.
“Do not allow your hopes to hide reality.”
Crashes once again started above us. Billy renewed his attempt to escape the monster’s clutches.
His half-shifted form clawing at the arm holding him hostage. Strips of flesh tore away from my
saviour’s arm, his blood dripping to mingle with the dirt floor.
The flustered female returned, her own chest now depicting slashes that were stitching up before
my very eyes. “I’m sorry, Alpha, she escaped. I was bringing her to you, but…”
“Enough. She means nothing. She will have no sanctuary. Send word to every pack and loner you
know to spread the word, if they should see Hazel Sallow, she is to be executed on sight.”
Without another word, she left to do his bidding.
“Billy Sallow,” the alpha started, “you are charged with the kidnapping and murder of human
children. You are charged with the kidnapping and murder of pregnant human women. You are
charged with the kidnapping and forced transformation of the young woman in front of you. How do
you plead?”
His hand opened slightly to allow Billy to breathe in a sharp breath, enough to be able to reply
against his charges.
“We are…” He swallowed audibly, his voice cracking from being constricted. “We are Lycans.”
“Yessss. We are Lycans. We are not gods,” he growled. “You are guilty, and in her absence, I find
the one called Hazel Sallow also guilty. She will join you in hell, eventually.” With a twist of his
wrist, and a jerk of his claws, Billy’s head dropped with a thud and rolled to stop at my feet. His eyes
stared up at me sightlessly in eternal shock. Hot streaks of crimson splattered against my bare feet, my
dull brown dress now covered in a pattern of scarlet.
I retched against the sight of his face forever locked in this image of death. I would remember him
for the villain he was, yet I would have nightmares of this moment always. My stomach heaved again
and the acidic taste of bile filled my throat.
“It was a quick death, feel no sorrow for him.” His large hand patted me on the back in an almost
sympathetic gesture, like he did not want me to feel sad. It’s not that I felt bad for his end, I had just
never seen a dead body before.
My grandma in the nursing home taking her last breaths were nothing compared to this.
“There’s blood on me,” I gasped out. “It’s on my feet.” I retched again, wheezing, trying
desperately to get air into my lungs and ignore the taint of the stain that covered my feet.
Big hands scooped me up, I was almost swallowed by the size of him, looking minute in
comparison.
“Fear not, little one. I will get you air.” His clawed feet cleared the stairs three at a time, and we
were upstairs in a matter of seconds. His tall form ducked to miss the dangling lights that swung from
the ceiling. “Almost there,” his guttural voice muttered.
The cool night air rushed over me in a wave of tranquillity. I gasped in lungfuls of it, my chest
heaving in great bursts of freedom. My saviour placed me on a bench that sat on the porch, the
wooden slats cold and damp through the cotton of my dress. But the chill was enough to make me feel
alive, it was an awakening that helped me get that much-needed air into my lungs and breathe for the
life inside me that relied on me.
“Thank you,” I breathed out into the silence of the night, the beast pacing in front of me.
“Who are you?”
He twisted to look at me, such gracefulness with his size. “My name,” he growls, “is Robert.”
 Three

Lily

“W here are we going?” I enquired, sitting in the back of a van with Robert beside me. Even
crouched low enough to fit inside, his hunched form towered over me. A member of his pack
sat in the front, driving us to what Robert stated was a ‘safe place’. Strangely, I felt safe with Robert.
Yet I felt uncomfortable around these other people, they stared at me - or more precisely - they stared
at my stomach.
These horrible old country roads made the vehicle bump and dive in the potholes. I grabbed onto
the seat beneath me, my fingers digging into the material, clutching on for dear life as the van jolted on
the uneven roads.
“Not much further,” Robert growled, his lupine face hiding in the shadows.
“Do I look like that?” I wondered out loud. “I don’t even know what I look like when I shift.”
“You do not look like me,” he assured me, looking into the darkness, his eyes searching for
nothing in particular, except maybe memories. “No one looks like me.”
“Why not?”
“I am the first,” he rumbled. “The one from which you all sprang from.”
A look of horror covered my face. “So you’re like, what? My dad?”
His own horrified expression shot towards me, his lips curling over his fangs. “God, no. I am not
your father.” The dark ruffle of fur around his ears shook with his denial. “Why would you think
that?”
“You said we all came from you, that’s generally what that means.”
A look of contemplation fell over him. “I am not your father, I do not know which Lycan sired the
Sallows, but it was none that I made.”
“How do you know?”
“I know the ones that I created by name. I know their scent, and I know their origins. Neither of
them created the Lycan that turned you.”
“Neither of them,” I muttered. “You said neither of them, that means you have only made two
Lycans?”
“You ask many questions, little one.” He shifted to the back of the van. “Save them for now, we
are here. You may ask your questions another time.”
“Where is here?”
 He looked at me pointedly, and I huffed as I rocked back and forth with the van’s movements, until
it shuddered to a halt. I struggled to my feet and ducked to keep my head from hitting the roof. The
double doors were wide open and letting the rays of the moon shine within, lighting my way to the
exit. Robert’s rough hands reached in and lifted me to the ground, not even giving me a chance to step
down.
He wrapped his hand around my arm, not the same way that Billy did earlier, Robert was gently
guiding me, helping me over the bumpy terrain. It was all gravel roads and weeds at the moment, but
it opened out onto a stone walkway that led to a little log cabin. It was an image from an autumn
postcard. Red and gold leaves hung over the rooftop, caressing the sides of the cabin. Thick foliage
and flowers of lavender surrounded the border of the little log dream house. The myriad of scents that
overwhelmed me were pure and sweet, not like the smells of decay that had constantly assaulted me
in the basement. It was the smell of life and love.
It was the smell of freedom.
“Do you like it?” Robert stood beside me, looking at the scene with a wary eye. “It is not much, it
is small, but it should do for now.”
“Not much?” I repeated, chuckling to myself. “It’s beautiful. It’s like a dream,” I whispered
reverently. Shaking off Robert’s hold, I walked slowly towards the cabin, breathing in the fresh night
air, while running my hands along the brush that grew along the walkway. “Is this where I’m staying?”
His nod of confirmation had me squealing in delight. I walked towards the front door as swiftly as
a waddling, heavily pregnant woman could. Pushing open the wooden door, I was greeted by a scene
of warmth and comfort. The fireplace was lit and the room was toasty, decorated in reds and amber
that complimented the natural-wood walls. Autumnal displays lined the mantle with a long sofa lining
one wall covered in an array of pillows that were large enough to swallow you. A dark shaggy rug
lay in the centre, spread out to lay before the fire. A stack of books that looked well-loved and well-
read sat upon a coffee table, titles of classics etched down their spines. The Great Gatsby, The
Hobbit, To Kill A Mockingbird were just a few.
“I will be back shortly. Lexi will get you anything you need.” He stalked towards the back of the
cabin, where I was left with the naked woman from earlier who had managed to find herself a dress.
Although ‘dress’ was an exaggeration. It was more like a scrap of material that barely covered her
crotch, and her nipples were prominent through the black silk, leaving nothing to the imagination.
Neither did she look particularly pleased that she was given orders to get me anything I needed. I
sat on the sofa facing her as she stood leaning against the wall, her arms crossed under her breasts,
pushing them together and boosting them up and almost out the top. My whole body relaxed into the
softness of the cushions, and I relaxed for the first time in what felt like forever. My feet were
swollen though after being on them for so long. I could no longer see my ankle bones. I had reached
the stage of my pregnancy where I had cankles.
My bare feet were filthy too. A rush of shame filled me as Lexi stared with disgust at the dirt that
had dried between my toes. It’s not like my captors had ever allowed me enough time to fully bathe. I
tried to cover them up with the material of my own dress, but it was not long enough. “Is there
anywhere I could shower, and perhaps have something clean to wear?” I asked her, plucking at the
filthy cotton that clung to my skin.
She scoffed. “You don’t need a shower, little one.” The use of the nickname that Robert had been
calling me all night sounded insulting from her mocking mouth. “What you need is to just go home and
forget that any of us ever existed. You can shower in your own house, wear your own damn
clothes…”
 Her voice trailed off and she straightened looking towards the hallway. Her attitude completely
changing with Robert’s arrival. She looked almost friendly, her dark brown eyes enraptured with the
figure walking towards us.
I smelt Robert coming, I knew it was him. But I could not picture the giant monster of a Lycan
with this beautiful stranger walking towards me. He was still tall for a human man, lean with
perfectly defined muscles that his brown jumper clung to. His pyjama bottoms were a thick wool in
shades of blue and green that hung just perfectly from his tall frame, the bottoms resting on long pale
feet.
His fingers brushed his damp hair back from his face, a blush staining his cheekbones at my
perusal. His stunning blue eyes didn’t look at me directly when he said that I could use the bathroom,
his fingers tugging the hem of his jumper lower. “Lexi will get you something you can wear, there are
things in the bathroom that you can use, but if there is a specific type of shampoo, please let her know
that too.” He smiled faintly. “I will show you where it is.” He turned back towards the hallway,
expecting me to follow. Freeing myself from the hefty dip in the sofa, I fight against the incline, finally
managing to pull myself to the edge of the seat where I wobbled to a stand.
Lexi stood in her spot glaring at me. I did nothing to gain this woman’s ire except to exist, and
there was nothing I could do about that. I offered her a smile as an olive branch, not wanting to start
this new day on a bad note. Her eyes cut towards me, sneering at my offer of peace, before she flicks
her dark fall of hair behind her and swings around to the front door, slamming it behind her.
That went well.
Following my nose, I found Robert in a modern bathroom laying out a stack of fluffy towels on the
shelf. “These are for you.” He gestured to another shelf beside the glass shower cubicle, filled with
bottles of shower gel and soaps. “Feel free to use anything you wish, it is easily replaceable.”
“I do not think Lexi wants me here,” I mumbled.
“Do not worry about her, she does not take well to strangers.”
To strangers? Or to women? Or maybe I was being too harsh on her, I am a stranger, brought here
with trouble - although not of my own making.
“Are you able to…?”
“Oh, yes. I can manage on my own. Thanks,” I muttered. I could feel my own embarrassment, this
strange man asking if I could shower myself. Even if I couldn’t, I think I would rather Lexi help me
than have him - the epitome of male beauty - wash my swollen naked body.
My thoughts stumbled to a vision of his rough hands gliding over my soapy breasts, cupping
them… Shaking my head free of the intrusive thoughts, I shut the door gently with a snick behind
Robert. Leaning my back against the wood and exhaling in relief, I reminisced on the events that
brought me to this miracle in the woods.
Dropping my filthy dress to the tile floor, I shoved it aside with my foot, that thing needed to be
incinerated.
The bathroom was starting to steam up already from the hot shower. The first touch of that
waterfall on the crown of my head was perfection. Just standing under the spray felt divine as I had
not had a real shower since the morning I was taken. A swirl of brown water twisted around my feet,
mingling with streaks of red from what was left of Billy. I watched evidence from the last few months
wash down the drain until the water ran clear of my encounter with the Sallows.
I hoped that wherever Hazel got to, it was not for long. I hoped someone finds her and brings her
to justice. They were kidnappers and baby snatchers, but I never had the slightest inclination that they
were also child killers. I was naive, thinking that they were just misguided. I’d spent too long trapped
in their basement thinking of them as humans.
They were not human, and they hadn’t been for a long time.
The odourless body wash foamed in my hands, and I almost wept at the bland scent. As a human, I
loved the scent of vanilla. But now, with my new senses, it was overwhelming to me. Robert had
odourless shampoos and soaps that didn’t annoy my nose. It was amazing that I did not have to walk
around smelling all the different aromas.
I squeezed the water from my long tresses and wrapped a towel around the blonde locks.
Grabbing another larger towel, I dried off, making sure to blot every drop from my newly clean skin.
At one point during my shower, someone had hung a terry cloth robe on the back of the door. I
shrugged it over my shoulders, the material completely dwarfing me. Burying my nose in the soft
robe, I was overwhelmed with smells of pine and something sweet that reminded me of over-
indulging as a child. I closed my eyes in satisfaction, just relishing in the sweet scents of home. A sob
lodged in my throat, trying to break free and ruin the small sanctuary that I found here.
“Are you ok?” Robert asked through the door.
I didn’t hear him approach, but I wiped my eyes with the sleeve of what I figured to be his
dressing gown, and cleared my throat. “I’m fine. Thank you for the robe.”
It swamped me and dragged on the ground as I opened the door to see him standing against the far
wall of the hallway, his hands tucked in the pockets of his pyjama bottoms. This stretched the material
across his thick thighs, leaving nothing to the imagination.
I shifted my eyes up quickly because last time he seemed embarrassed that I had been staring at
him. I didn’t want to make him feel uncomfortable. I knew all too well that feeling when Billy would
leer at me.
“I have made you something to eat. It is only sandwiches for now.”
I never realised exactly how hungry I was, and at the mention of food, my stomach let out a growl
that would rival any Lycan. “I could eat.” I chuckled.
His answering smile was bright, showing two deep grooves in the centre of his cheeks. He had
dimples! It just made me want to stick my fingers in each dip and feel him smile around me.
“Come. Let me feed you. Lexi will be arriving shortly to bring you some proper clothes.”
Oh joy.
 Four

Lily

T he kitchen backed onto the rear of the property, with large windows showing a view of the
valley beyond. The moon hung low in the sky, peering brightly through the beech trees.
A table tucked into the corner was just a small two-seater, neatly laid out with plates of
sandwiches of all kinds.
“I did not know which one you would like, so I made a range,” he muttered, pointing to the plates.
“There is ham and cheese, ham and cucumber, beef and mustard, and grilled chicken.”
He handed me a clear plate, and I ended up stacking one of each and eating like a starving woman.
The bread was fresh and soft, cut with a thick crust. I demolished everything, helping myself to
seconds.
He looked angrily down at my second plate. “I’m sorry,” I mumbled. “I should have asked if I
could have more.”
“Do not apologise for eating, there is plenty. I can make you more,” he grumbled. “I am angry that
they kept you hungry. They did not feed you.” He paced in front of me. “How long were you down
there?”
“I lost track. I had only just found out about my pregnancy, I was 7 weeks along. Now, I don’t
really…”
He looked horrified, his face ashen as he stared at my large stomach. “You have been down there
for months,” he whispered.
“Well, yes. But…”
“I did not know.” His hands scrubbed at his clean-shaven face. “They kept you chained like an
animal, and I did not know.”
I unconsciously rubbed at my wrists covered by the long sleeves. They felt smoother than before,
my new Lycan resilience wiping away the evidence of my imprisonment. Pretty soon, all physical
evidence would be gone, and I would be left with only the mental reminders of my time trapped in
that basement.
“You didn’t know. And you got there in time.” I smiled to reassure him that I held no blame
towards him. “How did you find out I was there?”
“A female wolf came to me earlier and told me of a pregnant woman held hostage by the
Sallows.”
Could it be the woman who came down with Hazel?
 “I immediately investigated the accusation and found you shackled to the wall.”
“What was her name, the woman who came to you?”
“Jennifer.”
Jen
“She helped me,” I whispered. Placing my plate on the table before me, I buried my head in my
hands, silent tears soaking into the sleeve of my borrowed robe.
“She is a good woman, she has already asked about your welfare.”
“I haven’t… I haven’t had good experiences with your… our… kind.” I sniffed, taking the tissue
held out for me. “I thought maybe Lycans were just horrible, and I don’t want to be a horrible
person.” I sobbed into the tissue, blowing my nose.
“We are not all horrible. Like humans, some of us are born with a black heart, there is no room for
good in their darkness. But also like humans, some are good, but circumstance dictates that they must
do things to survive, things that a normal person would not be able to live with. These are things that
Jennifer and her mate have had to do. You would not know about Jacob, he was before your time and
has been dead for over a year, but he made many of my people sacrifice their humanity to be able to
survive in the vile world of his making.”
I crushed the ragged tissue in my hand, taking a fresh one from him to wipe my eyes. “So, I will
not be evil when I shift?”
“Of course not. As Lycans, we are similar to the wild wolves. We hunt, we fight, we play. But
sometimes, our animal nature overwhelms the human senses, and we act outside of our human nature.
It is important to learn to control your beast, I can help you with that after the baby has been born.”
“You would teach me?” I whispered to him.
“There is another young Lycan here, he too was changed against his will. He has amazing control
for one so young, but you have already been a shifter for months, and you have adjusted remarkably
well too.”
Sitting up straighter, I resolved myself to learn everything there was to know about this new
world. “I would be grateful if you could tell me everything I need to know, and then when the baby is
here, I can practise shifting when he or she is old enough to be left with someone.”
He looked uncomfortable, his azure eyes searching my face for something. “I do not even know
your name.”
“Lily,” I said, holding out my hand. “Lily Taylor. Pleased to meet you.”
His hand engulfed mine, his palm rough against the softness of my skin. “Lily. Like the flower,” he
muttered to himself, staring at my hand enclosed in his. “Lily… your child…”
My free hand cupped the life within, apprehension growing inside me at his distraught expression.
“Your child…”
“My child what, Robert?”
I heard her coming, her footsteps were heavy as Lexi walked into the kitchen, dressed in the same
outfit. She dropped a bag on the floor at my feet. “Some clothes for your majesty.”
I ignored her, my attention still on Robert and what he was so worried to tell me. His gaze stayed
fastened on me, paying no attention to the scantily clad woman posing before him.
“You were saying?” I prompted, but he looked uncomfortably at me, as if he’d hoped Lexi’s
arrival would have interrupted our conversation.
“What he means is,” Lexi chimed in, “that your child will not survive the birth so…”
“GODDAMN IT!” Robert exploded. My heart thumping in my chest at his sudden outburst.
“She needed to know, and you were hesitating,” she huffed.
 His gaze stayed locked on my devastated one when he ordered her to leave. “You do not come
back until Lily invites you.”
She sputtered in denial of his order, her face red. He growled, staring her down until she lowered
her eyes and bared her neck.
This was the alpha. This was who Robert really was.
Lexi’s apology came low and too late in my opinion. She didn’t tell me that because she wanted
me to know, she did it to deliberately hurt me.
I saw it often in the nursery where I worked. Children would learn certain behaviour from their
surroundings. If children were in a violent environment, that’s all they would know. Then they would
bring that violence into the nursery and think it was ok to use that on other children. But we taught
them differently.
Lexi wanted to hurt me, and from what I had seen already of Lycans, I gathered they were not a
very peaceful race.
But I had years of patience dealing with toddlers, I could deal with a woman throwing a tantrum
too.
“Thank you for telling me, Lexi.” She looked at me sharply. “I appreciate it.”
“Lily, you do not have to…” I held my hand up, pausing Robert.
“It’s fine. I needed to know why you were both uncomfortable around me,” I said, “but I think you
are both wrong. My child is healthy. I feel it.”
“Him. You feel him,” Robert offered.
My hands gently rubbed the taut skin of my belly. “How… how do you know?”
“There is a distinct scent. You have a son,” he replied. “I did not want to tell you before. Although
Lexi’s way of providing information is not the most empathetic… she is right.”
“My son, I feel him. He moves around—a lot.”
“I am surprised that your pregnancy survived your first shift. Historically, the foetus, and
sometimes the mother, die during the initial transformation.”
“Is that why everyone was staring at me earlier when you brought me from the basement?”
He nodded warily. “They have never seen a pregnant Lycan before.”
“You… you can’t get pregnant?” I whispered, looking to Lexi for any confirmation. Her gaze was
fastened out the large window, refusing to acknowledge my question.
“It is a curse that was thrust upon us when we were first created. Infertility,” Robert replied for
her. “It is what sends many of our kind to search for the true death. There is no joy for many in life
without the love and affection of a child.” His words tapered off and his gaze turned inwards.
For just a second, I felt an inkling of sympathy for Hazel, a spark of pity for a woman who will
never experience what I have now. Although, if Robert is to be believed, then I will not have my child
for very long.
“Well, if he’s survived this long, who’s to say that he won’t make it through the birth?” They
looked at each other warily, they thought I was in denial. I wasn’t. My child—my son—was strong.
He would make it. A yawn took me by surprise, the skin at the corner of my lips stretching wide with
my fatigue.
“Come,” Robert said, holding out his hand to help me from my chair. “I will show you to the guest
room where you can get some sleep.”
The guest room was a small, double-sized room, far smaller than the basement I had been trapped in
for months. The difference was, this was clean and cosy. The single bed was pushed against the far
wall underneath the window, the duvet was a thick fleece navy throw that was already pulled back in
welcome. Pillows were piled high against the headboard in a matching red and navy chequered
pattern. A small bedside table held a lamp, and there was a small chair tucked in the corner beside a
narrow wardrobe. A light floral fragrance blew in through the cracked window, and the lace nets
shifted against the glass. The window looked out to the side of the cabin, where the lavender grew
upwards and crept towards the opening, reaching in like pale fingers.
“Thank you. I really appreciate what you are doing for us, Robert.”
He only nodded, worry etched across his features. “You will be fine in here?”
I sat on the bed, my bum sinking into the plush softness. “Oh, I don’t think I will have any issues
getting to sleep.” I bounced once, feeling the mattress sink under my weight. “This is far more comfier
than that heap of junk I’ve been sleeping on.”
His head lowered before me, a lock of dark brown hair falling across his forehead. My fingers
itched to sweep it back for him, but I clenched my fists tightly into the duvet so I didn’t give in to the
urge. “You are safe now, little one. No one will ever come close to hurting you.”
I simply smiled, and shuffled myself further onto the bed, using my arms to pull the heft of my
weight up the bed. My eyes felt heavy as soon as I rested back against the soft pillows. I was aware
that Robert had retreated from my little safe space, pulling the door shut yet not closing it fully. He
knew that I had been kept prisoner in a locked room. He left that door open so I could rest safely in
the knowledge that I was no longer trapped. I was a free woman, and that light that shone through from
the hallway was a way of comforting me.
His pretty words were a balm to my fractured self too, the promise of safety to a woman who had
rarely felt safe in recent times, would make any girl swoon. I think, if I had been ten years younger,
his sweet words would have made me weak at the knees. But it’s true what they say about women in
their 30’s. We’re free from the emotional immaturity and insecurities of our twenty-year-old selves,
generally having our own bullshit detector ingrained in our psyche.
That’s not to say that I didn’t believe him when he told me I was completely safe here, I did. But it
means that I would take everything with a pinch of salt from here on out, because pretty faces did not
always hide pretty hearts.
 Five

Lily

M y body is stiff when I awake the next morning. My back twinges and I ache to stretch my legs
and get the kinks out of underused muscles. The room is cast in shadow, with the hallway
light providing the only illumination. I must have slept far longer than I expected to.
My bladder is full, but this baby is pressing his foot down hard, as if he was trying to wake me
up. With every thrust of his little baby leg, I felt an urgency to pee. Dragging myself from the comfort
of the bed, I wrapped the fleecy throw around my shoulders and waddled to the bathroom where I
quickly relieved myself and washed up.
Mouth-watering smells had me salivating, and I made my way to the kitchen where Robert was at
the stove plating up a full English. “Here.” He placed a heaving plate of goodness onto the table, his
back still towards me. “I heard you get up, you must be hungry.”
The plate was piled high with hash browns, sausages, bacon and a fried egg that was made to
perfection, the yellow centre a perfect runny circle.
I sat down, throwing a napkin across my lap. I wasn’t normally a messy eater, yet the massive
belly that was now in my way meant I couldn’t lean forward, having to bring the food to me, and some
always spilled off of the fork.
I couldn’t wait to be able to bend over and tie my shoelaces and shave my legs properly.
But the overwhelming anxiety that Lexi was right, and my son wouldn’t live to take his first breath
was crippling.
I sat there, in this cottage-style kitchen being waited on by the most beautiful man I’d ever seen,
while on the verge of a panic attack. Calling on all my training, I took in deep breaths and held them
before exhaling on a long slow breath, telling myself the same thing I would tell an anxious child. You
are safe. This feeling will pass. We can change the ending.
“We can change the ending,” I whispered, my hands wrapped around my son, wanting more than
anything to keep him safe inside me where I could feel his movements and hear his heartbeat that
mimicked mine - swift and strong.
“What does that mean?”
“Hmm? Oh. It’s something that I used to tell my class when they were upset about something. We
can change the ending to your story.” I smirked. “I know it may seem naive, but they were only three
and four years old, some would get upset thinking that their parents had abandoned them at nursery.
We would come up with a new ending, and talk about mummies riding in on white horses to pick them
up. Daddies would climb in through the windows like Spider-Man and save them from the big bad
teachers. They loved it, it was so exciting for them to come up with ways that their parents would
arrive later on, after they had finished work.”
“Were they not disappointed when this did not happen?”
I laughed out loud, my own sadness almost forgotten. “Rarely. By the time their parents had come
to pick them up, most children had forgotten they were even upset in the first place.”
“Ah, so it was more of a distraction tactic?”
“Yes, and no. It definitely took their minds off the fact that their parents had gone, but I like to
think that it’s possible to change your story if your current tale is an unhappy one.”
He smiled softly at me, sitting opposite with his own plate.
We fell into a comfortable silence, the only noise was the scraping of cutlery on the ceramic. He
was an elegant eater, cutting each bite precisely and savouring each morsel, not a crumb out of place
when he finally placed his knife and fork down perfectly parallel with each other.
He fiddled with little items on the table, twisting the salt and pepper shakers this way and that
while I finished my own lunch… or dinner. I didn’t know which option to categorise my meal in.
“What time is it?”
“It is just after one in the afternoon,” he replied.
“I slept for over twelve hours,” I muttered. “God, I must look a mess.” My blonde tresses felt like
a bird’s nest on my head, ratty and snarled. This is what happens when you don't use conditioner and
go to sleep with it wet. Ugh.
“You needed the sleep, do not worry.” He stacked the empty plates by the sink. “if you wish to use
the bathroom, after I will give you a tour of the place, introduce you to some of the pack… if you want
to, of course.”
He must have seen the apprehension on my face. I did want to meet them, I was a pretty social
butterfly in my old life, but if they were going to start the pity party and pointing out things about my
child dying soon then I wasn’t interested in going anywhere.
“They are excited to meet you.” His words soothed my apprehension, and it was all the
encouragement I needed.
“Then yes, I would very much like that.”
“Perfect, whenever you are ready.” His excitement was evident, and it was brushing off on me,
because now I couldn’t wait.
Rummaging around in the bag that Lexi brought over yesterday was eye-opening. She had tried to
bring over the ugliest clothing she could find, but the joke was on her, because they were comfortable
as hell. The full coverage cotton support bra looked like something my grandma used to wear but it
held the girls’ weight up perfectly. The knickers were plain white cotton that felt like silk. And the
dress. She had brought over a Muumuu in a burnt orange, with a trail of lace on the V-neck and around
the hem, but it flowed over my bump perfectly. With my hair combed and plaited over one shoulder, I
looked like I was on a trip to a commune and was in tune with my inner flower child. Slipping my feet
into a pair of flip flops, I was ready to meet my new people.

Robert
Her scent permeated the whole cabin, everywhere I went was a reminder that I no longer lived alone.
I had a guest—a wanted guest—for the first time in centuries, and it was not just Lucian sticking his
nose in my business trying to force me out of my solitude.
Lily was a breath of fresh air from the hardened and cynical Lycans that I had come to know since
I moved here a year ago.
My whole life had turned inside out the day Lucian contacted me, the day that I finally took
control and removed Jacob from existence. Which was something that I should have done years ago.
Guilt and regret were my constant companions these days. They hounded my every waking thought, so
I sought solace in my dreams, where I was still a man and my family were still alive. My bedroom
was bare, save for one single painting that hung on my wall opposite my bed. The woman staring back
at me was a mirror image of my wife—the same bone structure, the same small smile. Even the dark
fall of her hair curled around her cheeks the same as Caitlyn’s. But her eyes were all mine. It was the
only thing that she had inherited from me, thank God.
Lauren had grown into such a beauty, but then, with Caitlyn as her mother, I never doubted it.
Lauren had been innocent of the ways of her mother’s people, had known nothing of the trouble that
her mother had wrought that night on the forest floor when she had sacrificed her loyal familiar in her
selfish need to keep me with her. The consequences of her actions had haunted me for over 500 years.
Shaking my head, I tried to relieve myself of such negative thoughts towards my wife, the woman I
had loved above all others and tied my life to, and was still bound to despite death separating us.
My daughter had grown up to get married and have her own children. When I finally had my mind
on straight after the transformation, and found out that everything I knew—my wife, her coven—was
destroyed, I had tracked her down in my own selfish need to know that she was alright. She was well
taken care of and loved, which was the most important thing. I never had any desire to introduce her
to this life, and so I left them to their humanity - something that I greatly missed.
I had watched over her children - my grandchildren - and their children after that, but watching
them age and decline had scarred me. I could not watch as my children, and their children, lived and
died, taken away from me far too soon whilst I remained in this frozen form, never to age, never to
die. I had to watch as time constantly changed everything around me, until nothing was familiar.
And so, I had retreated to my own solitary confinement, in a place far from here, where misery
and the forest wildlife were my only companions. For centuries, I had left those to their own devices,
refusing to get involved with the world of men. Refusing to watch their lives and deaths—it was not
my place to interfere anymore. I was not the Lord of the Manor anymore, it was not my place to
dictate how they ran their lives.
I left my self-imposed exile just over one year ago, when my best friend had called me
desperately wanting help in dealing with Jacob. He had once been as close to me as a brother too, but
I had ruined his life that night I had taken it upon myself to bite him and turn him into a monster. A
creature that had no remorse. Jacob had taken and taken in the most heinous of ways, until I could not
ignore his actions any longer.
It had pained me to take his life, a man that I had considered family. But it was for my last
remaining true family that I had no choice.
Zoe was a daughter descended from Lauren. Descended from me.
She was the last of my line, and I now had a new role in this miserable existence called life.
Protect Zoe Ward, the last blood witch.
I pulled the little device from my pocket and opened it the way Nathan had shown me to, placing
my thumb on the screen to unlock it. I had a notification of a text message and I opened it to see that
Zoe had contacted me about an hour ago.
This tiny insufferable contraption was hell to use, I would rather fight a Lycan with teeth and
claws than try and type on this little thing. My thumbs always pressed the wrong damned button. Why
couldn’t I just hand write a letter and send it, the way things used to be done?
It was all technology now and I hated it.

How’s my brother?
Is he ok?
Hello?
Hellooooo! Answer your fucking phone!

I looked back at the image of my beloved daughter. From what I had known of her, she had been sweet
and soft spoken. I tried to find similarities between her and Zoe, perhaps the tilt of her chin, or the
cheek bones?
It most definitely was not her attitude. Zoe was loud and brash, crass in her wording. She swore
like a sailor and wore clothes like a man.
She had taken to the life of a blood witch with all of the tenacity of a warrior and had meted out
revenge on those who had hurt her with viciousness and delight.
I was so proud of her.

He is fine.

I pressed send and tucked the phone back in my pocket. She would hate that I had not sent a two-page
letter detailing all of Nathan’s accomplishments, but my thumbs could only type so much before I had
to start deleting unwanted letters. This was actually my fourth phone, the previous ones had all had
‘accidents’. In all honesty, I had thrown them at things in frustration. Nathan had warned me against
breaking this one, telling me he would not help me set up another one if I was to break this one too.
Satan’s contraption vibrated against my leg with Zoe’s barrage of replies. She had her brother’s
number, she could message him instead.
Lily was already waiting for me in the living room, her hand had pulled back the curtain and she
was peeking outside as if she would be able to see anything of interest.
The dress that Lexi had brought over for her was hideous. Yet on Lily, it hinted at what she hid
beneath the oversized material. Her hair had been combed out and braided, the thick rope shining
golden down the straight slope of her spine. And when she finally turned to look at me, I was stunned
at the enchantress before me.
It was not even that she was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen, but her innocence and
purity glowed from within. Her smile transformed her whole face into a vision of exquisiteness. Her
pink lips spread wide and showcased her gleaming white teeth, perfectly straight except for a small
gap between the two in front. My inner gentleman receded and took note of this perfect imperfection.
Back when I had been a man, and not this imitation, a woman with this small feature would have been
coveted, lusted after by every man she smiled at.
Feelings that had lain dormant since Caitlyn died rose with fury inside me, blood rushed in my
ears and everywhere else as I took in every aspect of her beauty, right down to that little parting
between her teeth.
Her delicate hand rose to cover her mouth, hiding the perfection of her smile. The light dimmed in
her eyes as she took my staring to mean something else.
“You shouldn’t stare, it’s rude.”
“I am sorry, I did not mean it to be.” Discomfort wrapped around me and I shifted in my spot like
a teenage boy being reprimanded by his mother. “You should not hide your smile, Lily. It is beautiful.”
I coughed into my fist, feeling the awkwardness of the moment, and hoping that she sees my
compliment for the innocent comment that it is and not that of a man lusting after a woman.
“Sorry, I’m a bit self-conscious of it.” She dropped her hand from her mouth, smirking at me. “I
used to get teased at school for it. You can fit a bus through there, huh huh.”
She mimicked her tormentor, and I felt undeniable rage that someone would make this stunning
creature feel self-conscious about her looks, to make her feel shame in her smile. “In many cultures, it
is seen as good luck.” I was not about to tell her that women with that feature were supposedly
insatiable in bed, hence why they were desired above all others. That is not a conversation we should
be having so soon after meeting one another. Or ever.
“Are you ready?”
She picked up the navy fleece that had been on her bed, running her fingers through the fluffy
blanket before wrapping it around her shoulders.
“Is there no coat in the bag?”
“No, but that’s ok, I’m kind of attached to this now, it’s so cosy and warm.” She rubbed her cheek
against it, a soft smile painted on her face, but closed mouth this time. That was probably a good
thing, I was about to take her outside to meet the rest of the pack for the first time. I trusted the Lycan’s
on my property, but I did not need any distractions right now. Especially the distraction of an alluring
woman like Lily.
 Six

Lily

T he other cabins were nestled within the trees, so it looked like they had become part of the
forest. The natural shrubs and flowers littered the ground, creating a carpet of wonder. My feet
shuffled around trying not to crush any of the beauty beneath me. The pack had created a little
haven, isolated from outside influences. The aroma of freshly baked bread had my stomach rolling in
delight, despite eating a massive breakfast just recently.
Robert grinned at me sniffing the air. “They make their own bread and pastries here. They are
sold to the human bakery in town. The same with the freshly grown produce, they are taken into town
weekly and sold at markets.”
“Is that how you’re able to stay secluded up here?”
“Yes, they are self-sustainable, and the money they have made has allowed the pack to be
financially independent.” He pointed to the roof of a nearby cabin. “They have installed these things
that absorb power from the sun.”
“Oh, you mean solar panels?”
“Yesss,” he muttered, “that is what they were called. I am still learning about this time and all of
this… technology.”
“Um, where did you grow up, because you speak… strangely.” He smirked at me. “I hope I didn’t
offend you. I meant that…”
“It is fine. I grew up not far from here actually, but in a different time. I have not been a part of
this life for a good while.”
“Hazel had said that she had been around for dozens of years, how… how is that?”
“They turned you, but did not explain one single thing? I do not know why I sound so surprised,
they had no interest in helping you - only themselves,” he huffed.
“So, we live for a long time then?” I questioned, already liking this idea of an existence that
would have me living long enough to see in the next millennium.
“We do not live for a long time.” He paused and turned to face me. “We live for eternity. Nothing
less than death will end us. Remove our hearts, cut off our heads. It is a true death that will send us to
our afterlife.”
My mouth gaped open. This was something I never expected in a million years.
“I know that it may be upsetting for you…”
I shook my head, this wasn’t something upsetting.
 This… this was glorious.
“No. This is…” I laughed trying to articulate my joy. “This is amazing. You don’t understand, the
world is such a wonderful place and now I get to stay in it, forever. That’s what you’re saying?”
His eyebrows scrunched low on his face. “Immortality is not all sunshine and roses, Lily. You say
that now, but just wait until everyone you knew has left you—death comes far easier to mortals.”
“Death has already taken everyone from me ,Robert. Don’t assume you know anything about me,”
I replied tartly. “My parents died when I was a child and I was raised by my grandma. She died two
years ago; and since then, it’s just been me.” I traced the curve of my stomach. “And now him.”
The crease between his eyebrows became more pronounced as he watched me. “Forgive me, Lily,
but after living for over 500 years, I can safely say that it has not been an adventure.”
My hand rubbed the taut muscle of his arm in a gesture of comfort. Normally I’m a hugger, but I
don’t think he would feel comfortable with a strange woman wrapping her arms around him in the
middle of the pack lands. “I’m sorry that your experience hasn’t been a good one, but surely that can’t
be the rule for every single Lycan?”
He paused under my hand, staring down at where my palm touched him. “Life has definitely not
been kind, but then, it has not been to you either. You are so young, and yet you have lost much
already.”
“It’s fine, I had my nanna. She was the most amazing woman. She always said that life was too
short and that you should enjoy every moment of it - and we did. We went travelling, we had days out
together, just her and I. We ate out often because neither of us really liked cooking, but we like to eat,
so we would go to a different restaurant each time.” I chuckled at the memories as they lit up like
fireflies in my mind’s eye. “We did everything together. And before she died…” Hmmm, I tried to
dislodge the lump in my throat. I didn’t normally get upset anymore at her loss, perhaps the pregnancy
was making me more emotional than normal.
Robert crooked his elbow at me, and I threaded my arm through it and gave him a grateful smile
as he helped me over the unstable gravel.
“Before she died, she told me that I shouldn’t be sad when she leaves, because she had already
seen that I would do great things with my life.” A handkerchief appeared out of nowhere, and I took it
gratefully, dabbing at the tears in my eyes. “I think… I think this is what she meant, you know? This is
what I’d been waiting for. We can do all the things that Nanna and I did together. We can travel, do
anything we want to, eat out. It’s going to be so amazing.”
When my son was old enough, I was going to teach him everything that Nanna taught me. I would
take him to the Grand Canyon, to the Eiffel Tower, to see the Pyramids, and Stonehenge. Everything
that we had done together, I would show him. And I couldn’t wait.
The amount of possibilities that were open to us now was immeasurable.
Mortality had been a constant companion in my life, but unlike some people, death did not make
life unlivable for me. The constant reminder that life was transient only meant that I had to cherish it
more, and enjoy what I had.
Yet, if life was endless, I had so much more time to enjoy it at my leisure.
“Little flower, I am glad that you had that relationship with your grandmother, but…”
Robert was tension personified standing next to me, he didn’t agree with me. His experience
couldn’t be denied and I would never stand here and tell him that his feelings were not justified, but
neither could he tell me that now I was a Lycan, my life would be shit from here on out. I refused to
believe that.
“Hey, Robbie.”
 A tall figure approached us from the side, a character T-shirt hanging from his lanky frame. He
was young, still a child really, with all the features of youth in his face, but he was taller than Robert.
He threw his skinny arm around Robert, grinning mischievously, his pale green eyes sparkled with the
tell-tale signs of a kid who had a secret.
“Nathan, meet Lily. She’s like you, new to Lycanthropy.” His look was pointed, telling Nathan
with only a look about my experience. Although I’m sure in such a close community, they all know
how I got here by now.
Nathan reached his hand around Robert, holding his palm out. “Hi, Lily, welcome to the pack.”
His enthusiasm was contagious, and I clasped his hand in mine, where he shook it vigorously. My
whole arm vibrated with his exuberance, and I laughed along gaily with him. He was absolutely
adorable.
“It’s nice to meet you, Nathan. Robbie?” I asked him gleefully. I loved that Nathan had given him
a nickname, it suited him.
“Nate here thinks that I am stuck-up, and ‘Robert’ is a stuffy name, so he started calling me
‘Robbie’,” Robert said with annoyance, although the small smile at the corner of his lips showed that
he probably secretly liked the teasing.
“Robbie. It suits you.” His eyes sparkled like the most expensive sapphires at my compliment.
“We were going on a little tour, would you come with us, Nathan?”
Nathan’s arm dropped from Robert’s shoulders, and he jogged over to my side holding his own
arm out like a gentleman. “I would love to join your tour. But call me Nate, everyone else does.”
Robert followed behind us at a more sedate pace, chiming in with information when Nate didn’t
know the answer. They were a duo, a team, and they made me feel welcome as they showed me the
ins and outs of pack life. I learned that Nathan had been turned against his will last year when he was
only fifteen, and he was here now to learn about being a Lycan by Robert because he “knew all the
shit.” In Nathan’s words, not mine.
“So, I’m in capable hands then.” I smirked, staring at Robert and watching as his cheeks flushed
pink.
Robert introduced us to those we came across. They were generally friendly, yet they seemed
more standoffish than Nathan with all of his childlike excitement. Every person I was introduced to
offered me sympathy and comfort, a welcoming hand, a soft hug. They joked with Nathan and treated
him like the little kid brother of the pack.
But not one person looked directly at Robert, and as we got further into the inner workings of the
little village, more and more people outright avoided him.
By the time we had reached the centre where everyone was working together to pack up the fresh
fruit and vegetables into containers for delivery, my smile was strained and my feet ached.
“You get used to it,” Nate leaned down and whispered in my ear.
“What?”
“They don’t dislike you, but they steer clear of Rob, don’t take it personally.”
“Why don’t they go near him?”
His eyes bugged at me. “You’ve seen his shifted form right? It’s not normal, and they’re all scared
of him,” he muttered.
“But he's good to you, and from what I’ve seen, the whole pack adores you.”
His eyes crinkled at the corners when his grin spread wide. “They don’t adore me, trust me.
They’re just shit scared that I'm gonna tell my big sister that they were mean to me.” He snickered. “I
did it once, you see that hairy dude over there.” He pointed to a short, stout, hairy man that was
hefting boxes into the back of a truck. “He was so rude to me when I first got here, so I told him that I
was going to tell my big sister about him. I swear, I thought he was gonna crap his pants.” His snicker
turned into outright laughter, and the man in question turned and glared at us from his position.
“Your sister is a Lycan too?”
“Oh, hell no, my big sister is only the strongest witch in the world.” His chest puffed up. “Zoe’s a
blood witch, and she killed loads of Lycans last year when they tried to kill her, and now they’re all
scared she’s gonna come back and rip their hearts out, like she did with the other ones.” He bit into an
apple, unaware that he’d just dropped a bombshell on me. “So, yea. She lives in Scotland with her
fiancé and my Aunt Lissa. We talk on the phone all the time, and Rob’s going to take me home for the
holidays so I can see them. But everyone here hates Zoe because Robert only came back to save her
and not to help them like they’d been asking him to for years and years.”
A witch? Witches were real? Jesus H Christ, what next? Vampires?
“Woah, woah. Slow down, what?”
“Oh, you didn’t know?” His voice was garbled around his mouthful of food. “Robert wasn’t
around for centuries, and he only came back last year to get all the Lycans in order. A lot of the people
here used to try and intimidate the human villages into buying their stuff, but they’ve lost money
because when Rob came back, he made them sell their goods honestly.”
I looked at the village with fresher eyes, at the women who had welcomed me with open arms.
Armed with Nate’s knowledge, I understood why some of them looked equally miserable and angry.
Some of the women stood off to the side, Lexi being one of them, glaring at us from their spot at a
table packaging strawberries. A few of the men were carelessly throwing things into the truck, not
caring about damaging the goods. One of them just stood leaning against a tree watching the events
unfold, a cigarette hanging loosely from his sneering lips.
“Like I said, don’t take it personally. They’re nice to you because… you know.” He waved at my
stomach. “if you weren't knocked up, they would probably be a bit more hostile. They’re used to
doing things their own way, and now Robert’s making changes, they’re not massively happy.”
“They do not have much of a choice,” Robert interrupted loud enough that everyone around us
with their super hearing heard his comment. They quickly shifted their gazes down and got to work,
making an effort to ignore us.
“Come, Lily, I wish to introduce you to someone.”
Robert led us to a little cabin on the outskirts of the forest, where a little one-storey house with a
garland of flowers hung on the front door. The door opened as we walked up the gravel path. A man
with a bright red beard stood in the doorway, a tea towel slung over his shoulder. “Robert.” His
greeting terse and frosty.
“Richie, this is Lily.”
His eyes widened, he hadn’t noticed me standing next to the alpha, his whole attention on the large
man by my side.
Richie wiped his hands on the towel and quickly flicked it back over his shoulder. “Lily, it’s a
pleasure to meet you. Forgive us for not coming straight over to meet you, my wife and I did not wish
to crowd you. It’s not the easiest thing, acclimating to a life like this.”
His voice was gruff and hard, but his words felt honest and I shook his hand, feeling the coarse
palm scrape across my skin. But his hand was gentle around mine, a light squeeze before stepping
back from his visitors.
“Who is that, Rich?”
A feminine voice called out from inside, a familiar accent that I was unable to place.
 The dainty woman stepped out from behind her giant of a husband, her head barely coming to his
bicep. Her hair was a dark brown bob, a plain style but one that suited her pixie-shaped face. Her
eyes widened when they spotted me, and I knew why she looked so familiar.
She looked differently in the light and in different clothes too. But I recognised the woman that
saved me.
“Jen?”
“You’re here,” she whispered. “He got you out.” She stared longingly at my baby bump, as I
waddled towards her.
“You saved me. You got to Robert in time.”
Richie pulled his wife into his side, her face flushed bright red.
“I thought that you were Hazel’s friend, but you helped me. I never got a chance to say thank you.”
She stood on the stoop looking down at me, cuddled in her husband’s arms.
“Hazel went rogue, she was going to bring more trouble to our kind with her actions. I did what I
had to do.” They looked at each other adoringly. “I’m just glad that you’re both safe now.” She pulled
out of Richie’s arms. “Would you… would you like to come in for tea… or something. I just pulled
fresh pastry bites from the oven, they’re blueberry…”
My stomach growled at the mention of food. “Sorry, it happens often these days.” I chuckled.
Sadness touched her eyes although she still smiled at me. “Come, come. Let me feed you. There
will still be enough to send to the bakery.”
Richie was apprehensive as we all piled into their tiny cottage. He stood close to his wife as she
walked into their house. The living room and kitchen was open plan and smelled divine. Little golden
pastries sat on cooling trays along the countertops. Jenny had tongs in her hands, picking up the tasty
bites and piling them onto a large plate. “Here, eat up. Be careful they’re still hot though.”
She stood back wringing her hands, watching as we all reached in to grab a morsel. The pastry
burned my tongue but the explosion of sweetness overpowered the heat and I groaned with pleasure,
my eyes closing to enhance the experience of eating this ambrosia. I licked away the golden flakes
that had stuck to the corner of my lips before reaching for another helping.
Robert stared at me. I felt my cheeks flush in embarrassment and knew from experience that the
redness would spread across my chest. It had been the bane of my existence since I was a teenager
with my pale skin. I pulled the blanket across my chest tighter, and I saw from the corner of my eye
Robert’s gaze shift from mine to the plate of goods.
“How are you holding up, Lily?” Jenny’s soft voice held concern as she poured me a glass of cold
water.
“Well, this is much more comfortable than that basement.” I plucked another pastry from the
slowly diminishing plate. Flakes of pastry fell on my lap and I carefully picked each one up and
placed them back on the plate so I didn’t make a mess on my host’s floor. Looking up, I caught
everyone staring at me. Robert’s fists were clenched as they rested on his knees. Nate’s mouth hung
agape, bits of chewed up pastry visible between his teeth. I placed a finger under his chin and
carefully closed his mouth. “You shouldn’t eat with your mouth open.”
They stared at me, an awkward silence filling the room. “Don’t be uncomfortable about my
experience, it’s ok. I’ve had months to accept what happened to me.” My fingers curled within the
hem of the blanket. I wasn’t used to this much scrutiny, not to mention that prior to being held captive,
my entire conversation skill set was aimed at five-year-olds. Little children rarely have filters, and
I’d picked up on that habit.
“Keeping your feelings trapped inside is not healthy.” I aimed a gentle smile at the couple across
from me. “It stews and rots until you become bitter and miserable. It’s important to talk about
experiences, it’s a tried and tested coping mechanism. Believe me, it helps when dealing with little
children too.”
“You have spent much time with young children?” Jen was still tucked underneath her husband’s
arm, her hand clenched onto his flannel shirt.
“Oh yes, it was my job. I was head of the nursery. I really should contact them, they would be
worried especially when I didn’t show up for work.” I twisted towards Robert. “Can I do that? Call
them?”
“As a matter of fact, I will be heading towards the city tomorrow. I promised Nathan that I would
take him to visit his sister.” One arm flung over the back of the sofa, he was twisted slightly towards
me. “I think it is best if you stay here. Jen and Richie are good people, they will help you with
anything you need while we are away.”
“Well now…”
“What?”
Richie’s voice carried over mine, clearly he had only just been made aware of these plans.
“I trust that you will help Lily in any way she needs.” It wasn’t a question, it sounded more like an
order from the alpha. Bright splotches of anger covered Richie’s cheeks, his face lowered slightly to
bare his neck.
“Alpha, my wife and I have plans…” He looked towards Jen, tears pooling in her eyes, his teeth
gritted against her obvious pain. “We cannot watch the lady for you.”
“You are the only ones I trust fully here, ones that I know have her best interest…”
He continued speaking, but I lost interest in what he was saying, my attention solely on Jen. She
refused to look at me, her head lowered and the curtain of her hair covered her face from view.
Robert was still speaking, trying to convince Richie to take care of me, as if I was a child. My hand
rose of its own accord, squeezing Robert’s jean-clad leg to get his attention. His eyes shot to my hand
that lay against him, his whole body tensed under my grip, his thigh like stone encased in denim. His
nostrils flared, while his eyes burned with a heat that I had only heard of in romance stories.
“Can I not just go with you?” I leaned in, making direct eye contact with him, his eyebrows
pinching as he watched me. My other hand rested lightly against my stomach, drawing his attention to
the reason why Richie did not want me to stay.
His shoulders rose with his deep inhale, breathing out slowly in recognition of why I chose to
accompany him rather than stay here.
Jen—the whole pack—envied me. That wasn’t me bragging, I could see the agony on Jen’s face
as she watched me. She wouldn’t have this, perhaps I wouldn’t have this ever again either. But at the
moment, Richie was protecting his wife’s feelings, and keeping her cocooned in his embrace so she
didn’t have to watch me caress the bump that I just waddled right into her house with.
Damn it. I’d seen the sadness on Lexi’s face earlier when I’d asked her, but I never stopped to
consider what walking around the pack would make these people feel. Most of them had been alive
far longer than I had even been born and had craved a child as long as that. And here’s me just
rubbing it in their faces.
“We are leaving tomorrow morning, it will be a long drive.”
“Whoop.” Nathan’s call of glee cut through the tension. “Road trip!” He shoved the last blueberry
pastry into his gob, unaware of the apprehension that filtered off the man sitting next to him.
A grimace stretched across my face as I felt the baby kick my insides once again. There was no
more room for him, and soon, he would be breaking free of his confines ready to conquer the world.
 “Come.” Robert rose easily from his seated position, holding a hand out to help me up. “I will
take you back to rest.”
He pulled me easily from the sofa and made sure I was steady on my feet before letting go of his
tight grip on my hand. I felt strangely bereft not having his heat at my side or his hand in mine. It was
an unfamiliar emotion that I didn’t know what to do with. My confusion must have been mistaken for
something else because Jen was at my side in a heartbeat.
“Are you ok, the baby?” Her hands hovered in front of me, concern lacing her every word.
“He’s getting bored in there, I think.” My lips pinched tightly together to cover the wince as he
shoved his fist right up into my ribcage. “Not much longer now.”
Her hands shook in front of me, her palms held towards me. She was enraptured as my belly
undulated from my baby's outbursts. Grasping her hand gently in mine, I placed it on the curve,
holding it right over the next kick.
“Darling, I -”
“Sshh, Rich, I can feel him.” Her eyes widened in amazement, her lips parted as he continuously
punched out at the hand that pressed against him from outside of his safe space. Wonder glistened in
her eyes as she swivelled her head to her husband. “He’s kicking me.”
Richie’s face softened as his wife giggled, and a small smile pulled at the corner of his lips. His
eyes swept across Jen’s face as she watched enraptured by the baby’s somersaults. I stood there, my
back aching and my feet swollen, but I refused to move and take away this tiny bit of happiness that I
was able to give her.
“Come, little one.” The warmth of Robert’s hand pressed against the base of my spine. I tilted my
head upwards, a smile at the ready to see him watching the ripples beneath the material of my dress.
A sadness rose to the surface hinting at a haunting memory from a time long forgotten.
Jen’s hands fell away and pressed together at her chest, as if her fingers were clasped in prayer
beneath her chin. “Thank you.” Her smile wobbled as she stepped back into her husband’s embrace.
“For sharing your son with me.”
I chose my words with care, not wanting to upset her with an offer to see me again, but not
wanting to offend her by not offering to come back.
“Perhaps, when I get back, I could come over for more blueberry tarts?”
Her smile stretched wide, her eyes glistened with relief. “I would very much like that, Lily.”
Richie wrapped his arm around her, his head towering over her. Above her line of sight, and
before Robert guided me towards the front door, he mouthed thank you.
 Seven

Robert

T he walk back to the cabin was slow as Lily placed each step carefully. Her free hand, the one
that was not rubbing her back, clutched tightly to me. The Lycans watched us carefully from
their positions around the camp that they had spent a lifetime building.
For a long time, I had ignored their pleas. They had wanted me to intervene with their politics,
consider a place amongst them so that they did not fall victim to the viciousness of Jacob’s pack and
others who saw fit to prey on the few Lycans who turned away from the life of violence that many of
our kind enjoyed, giving in to the bloodlust of the beast.
But I ignored them. Just as I had ignored everything else except my own pain.
And when I finally heeded their call, they did not trust me.
I could not blame them either. I came here only because I had nowhere else to go in the mortal
world. My ancestral home was in Zoe’s hands and had been taken care of for centuries by Lucian. It
may be titled ‘Garrick Manor’, but it was theirs now. And so, I had come here, to the small group of
Lycans who preached peace. It was much smaller a year ago, a dozen shifters maintained this small
community, selling their produce for too much money, intimidating the humans in the village into only
buying from them. It wasn’t physical, the Lycans here were not about that life, but their appearance—
mostly large hairy men—scared the older people. The village was full of retirees, and they cowered
in the face of the bullies.
And slowly, once my presence was known here, more Lycans followed. There was 28 of us now,
including Nathan. Once I had my footing here, I had put a stop to the pilfering of pensioner’s money.
And with the arrival of Jen, she had started contributing with her delicious pastries, which appeased
the others as it helped boost the coffers. It was also Richie who had recommended the solar panels,
helping to keep the pack self-sufficient, and cheaper to run. The couple had been instrumental in
helping us remain sustainable and, dare I say, happy?
Yet now they wanted something from me that I was not sure I wanted.
The role of Lord Alpha.
They had handpicked the name and role to symbolise the hierarchical society that we lived in,
whilst also appointing me as their unofficial leader and keeping track of the Lycans who wanted war
with the blood witch. A few of those that arrived were ones who were granted mercy by my vengeful
relative, and they did not want to go back down that dark path where they were in hiding from
someone hell bent on tearing their hearts from their chests… after the torture session.
 They expected me to keep the entire world’s shifter population in order. Not just in the UK, but
everywhere!
I returned from my self-imposed exile to aide Zoe in managing the Lycans who had tormented her
kind, not to play babysitter to beasts who snipe and gossip about each other like petulant children.
So far, two males had approached me to mediate in their dispute over land surrounding their
cabins. Apparently, one of them had marked his territory the old-fashioned way, scent marked the
surrounding trees. Now they were fighting over who owns which side.
Another man had been stealing the livestock from a local farm and had only been found out when
others were awakened by the scent of sheep’s blood. Hunting wasn’t the issue, but if the locals found
out what we were, it could cause a whole host of other problems that we weren’t equipped to deal
with. Humans could not handle the knowledge of our existence yet, and he put us all at risk with the
theft of the animals.
It was almost as if I was a human man again and handling issues from my father’s estate. The
politics and drama were a bore to me then, yet it was expected of me as my father’s heir. Now, it
seemed that I was still destined to deal with other’s problems.
All these problems paled in comparison to the issue gently holding onto me for balance. Lily’s
natural scent infiltrated my senses, a sweet and heady mix that was overpowering. Wisps of gold
trailed along her cheek where they had come loose from her plait, and she brushed them out of her
face with slender fingers, tucking the strands behind her ears.
“Do you think Zoe will like me?” Her whispered words held a touch of anxiety.
“Zoe is… complicated” I paused, trying to describe the young woman who I had only met a
handful of times, though not through lack of trying. Our steps were in sync as we carried on walking in
silence, while she waited patiently for me to reply. “Zoe is kind and funny, and she loves her family.”
“I sense a but?”
“But she does not like me, and this may trickle down to you also. I do not know how she will
react to seeing you,” I gestured to her very pregnant self, “like this.”
Her face pinched in concentration, little lines forming between her eyebrows. On other people,
that pinched look seemed miserable, as if they were sucking on something sour. But on Lily, it made
her look younger and endearing.
“Maybe it will have the opposite effect than you think.” Her sea-green eyes peered up at me, open
and guileless. “If she’s as kind as you say, then maybe she will be happy about the baby?”
A myriad of possible outcomes swept through my raging thoughts, it’s highly likely that once my
wayward descendant heard Lily’s tragic tale, she would soften towards the new Lycan. Especially
considering there was a high possibility that the young child would not survive the birth. Zoe’s own
loss would make her empathetic towards anyone in a similar position.
But Zoe was also not open to the idea of befriending Lycans, she saw us as animals. Beasts. And
me, the one who turned the man who became her tormentor… I was not in her good books despite
keeping our lines of communication open. She only contacted me to get updates on her brother,
otherwise I am sure she would be happy enough to forget I ever existed.

Lycans were notoriously light on their feet, and unless you were experienced in dealing with them,
you would not hear them coming. I, however, had centuries of perfecting the tricks of the trade. But
you could most definitely smell them coming.
 Hector was one of the few who had arrived after Zoe’s merciful break. He often liked to brag
about how he ‘got one over’ on the blood witch. Nathan hated him. I tolerated him here because he
was a weak man with a big mouth, and it was better to have him close to keep an eye on him than to
have him wandering the world causing trouble that I would inevitably have to clean up anyway. He
liked to chew tobacco and carried a little metal tin with him wherever he went. He smelled of earth
and cow dung, not a pleasant combination, but it made it easier to track him as he left wads of spit in
his wake.
Lily was not used to the pungent aroma of the ever-dishevelled Hector, and I saw her nose
wrinkle. “Uh, what is that smell?”
“Alpha.” The rough grate of his voice pulled up beside me, and Lily’s free hand went up to cover
her nose. “I’mma glad I found ya. Was hopin’ to meet Miss Lily before you travelled.”
“Oh?” Lily’s fingers clenched tightly on me, and I shifted my bulk just enough so that my shoulder
was in front of her, giving her a blockade against the intrusion. “And what would you want to speak to
Miss Lily about?”
 Eight

Lily

T he stench was foul, an assault on my senses. My eyes watered and my nostrils desperately
needed rinsing out. The man stared at me from behind hanks of greasy dirt-brown hair that hung
to his shoulders. It fell across one eye like a used up, washed out Hanson wannabe with a
crack addiction.
He asked for me specifically, and my manners were hammering at my insides, wanting to
acknowledge the visitor, but a sixth sense was screaming in my heart to stay far back. The hair on the
back of my neck stood up like a warning, my inner beast growled at the intrusion and wanted to make
itself known, but I kept myself half behind Robert and allowed him to take the lead. It was clear he
knew of the man from the stiffening of his own spine, his own reaction made me feel a bit easier
knowing that he was also ruffled, and it wasn’t just me being paranoid.
His beady eye leered at me, and a phlegm-like cough wretched from the back of his throat. A wad
of black tar landed at his feet with a splatter, and he swallowed what was left in his mouth, a drop of
darkness around his bottom lip was sucked in with a swipe of his yellowing tongue.
I heaved behind my hand, bile rising, until I got control of myself and wiped my mouth on the back
of my hand, turning my head into Robert’s shoulder so that he was the only thing I could smell. The
heavenly scent of pine encompasses my world, the vile stench of the newcomer forgotten as I bathed
in Robert’s fragrance, my whole body relaxing into him. I breathed deep, luxuriating in his strength
that supported my cumbersome frame.
“What is it, Hector?”
Hector needed a bleach bath.
The force of Robert’s words punctured the air, and Hector’s lone eye lowered to the floor in
supplication, but it wandered over to stare at my toes that peeked out from beneath my dress. Lust
entered his gaze as I curled my feet underneath the material and he quickly looked away.
“I… I… was… I… just… never seen…”
“It’s ok, thank you for coming to meet me, Hector.” I turned to face him fully, breathing from my
mouth. The pack would never respect me if I hid behind my saviour. Already they watched from their
packing tables, curiosity in some, and censure in others. How would I ever make friends if I judged
everyone by their appearance… and smell? Though I stayed close to Robert, still holding onto him
like a lifeline, I tried to appear braver than I felt when I offered Hector a small smile.
“Ma’am …uh, Miss …it’s a damn pleasure to meet you. We’ve all been really curious about you.”
A pale hand, with jagged nails caked in mud, rubbed down his thigh in an attempt to clean them up
before holding it out for me to shake. “We been wondering if the alpha would let us meet ya.”
I stared at his outstretched hand, thinking about all of the germs that coated his skin. I would
definitely need another scrub before bedtime. And possibly a nit-comb. But when in Rome and all
that. Hesitantly, I reached out to clasp his hand in greeting, but Robert’s heavy hand clasped my wrist
firmly before I could make contact. His pointed cerulean gaze looked down at me over his shoulder, a
small shake of his head had a lick of hair falling forward, making him look less of a threat. But this
didn’t make a difference to Hector, whose affronted features glared daggers at his alpha.
“I didn’t mean no harm, Alpha. Was just gonna shake the ladies hand, is all.”
Robert’s eyes blackened with his anger, yet his hand gripped tightly to me was still gentle as he
tugged me behind him. A low growl fell from his lips as his dark brows lowered over his glowing
irises. “I have not forgotten that you are on a trial run here, your probation is not up until you have
proven yourself to the pack.”
“And how am I supposed to prove myself if you don’t let me near the lady?”
Robert’s snarl of aggression had Hector’s shoulders curling in towards himself, his hanks of hair
covering his face with his muttered apology.
“She is not for you to help atone.”
“B-b-but the blood witch, s-s-she pardoned me, she -”
“She never forgave you. It was left up to me to see if you could fit in with the pack here, and so
far I have seen no sign of thanks to the blood queen for her mercy, nor a willingness to contribute to
the running of things,” Robert spat. “Your crimes are still in limbo, and you have a long way to go
before you make reparations. You should be helping the others on the outskirts with repairing the
fences, now GO.”
He slunk off, his head hanging low and my heart pinged in my chest at his defeated look.
“Your heart is soft, little flower.” Robert’s grasp loosened, and his hand rested at the small of my
back to guide me forward and continue on our route back to the cabin. “Do not feel badly for him, he
spent years living on the street preying on the homeless. He was not caught, only because he did not
kill those who people would miss.”
Air rushed from my lungs, a mix of flutters at his use of the nickname and horror as he recounted
Hector’s story. “Then why did the blood witch let him go?” Nathan had regaled me with tales of his
beloved big sister and how she had taken revenge on many Lycans who had hurt her. His chest puffed
with pride when he talked about the things she had done. So I knew all about the ones she had granted
clemency to in her pursuit of information about one particular shifter. Honestly, I was jittery as hell
about meeting her tomorrow, what with all of the conflicting things I’d heard so far.
“If Zoe killed every single Lycan who had ever committed a crime, there would be hardly any of
us left. The idea was for them to atone for their crimes and integrate into our way of life in the hopes
that they would be more civilised with a mentor to guide them. Hector has been quite reluctant to fit
in, but Richie has been handling many of the newer men here, putting them to work.”
“Didn’t he get here at the same time?”
“Yes, but he immediately jumped in to help run things, he was a site manager at a big development
at one point. It has come in very useful.”
“And Jen, she manages the women?”
“No. Lexi does that. She is the strongest woman here, and she was turned over 50 years ago, so
she is experienced. Neither has she had any dealings with Zoe as Lexi has been here since the pack
started. Initially it was her and a few others, and they put the word out quietly so that other loners
knew they had somewhere safe to go from… from -”
“From Jacob?”
“You know about him?”
“Nate filled me in.”
His eyes rolled. “Of course he did,” he muttered. “Jacob was a mistake that should have been
fixed a long time ago.”
The cabin came up ahead of us, and Robert’s hand fell away from me so that he could open the
door. The sight of the dream house never failed to mesmerise me with its flower decor and bright
colours. Although stepping in, I was greeted by something less than desirable.
Lexi lay sprawled on the sofa, her bare legs crossed at the ankles, and the white oversized dress-
shirt she had on had ridden up so everyone and their neighbours could see the shadow between her
thighs. She munched on a plate of biscuits, and embarrassingly, my stomach growled at the coconut
aroma.
She smirked as she held the plate towards me, but it felt more like a dig at my always hungry belly
than her actually being nice and sharing her snacks. “No, thanks.”
“Are you sure? Baby sounds hungry.” She snickered.
“What are you doing in here?” Robert demanded. “I told you that you could return on Lily’s
notice.”
Ceramic clattered on the table, crumbs scattering as Lexi practically threw the plate down, her
feet dropping to the floor. “Me and Lily are buddies, aren’t we?” She stood, brushing off her shirt.
“She said I could come back, didn’t you, Lil.”
I cringed at the bastardising of my name—I hated it when people abbreviated it. It wasn’t even a
long name, and Lil sounded like a cartoon character. Robert looked at me for confirmation, but just
for the sake of peace, I gave him a small smile—though it felt more like a grimace. But as Lexi was
the woman in charge here, I don’t think being on her bad side would do me any favours. My grimace
must have looked suspicious, because he stared at me unflinchingly, watching for a hint that I didn’t
want her there. My smile for him though was completely genuine, his concern for me since he found
me in the darkness had been faultless.
His warm chest was firm beneath my hand, his shirt wrinkling under my palm as I reassured him
silently that Lexi was fine to stay here… and eat all of the biscuits… and give me the stink eye.
A low growl, almost imperceptible, rumbled from Lexi’s chest as she glowered at my hand where
it softly stroked Robert’s chest. Out of pettiness, I ran my hand up higher until I felt the hard muscles
contract beneath my palm. Rob’s swift intake of breath stuttered my spiteful feelings for the woman
who had eaten all of the biscuits. It’s not like they were mine anyway. But damn it, a pregnant woman
was allowed to get hangry. I also hadn’t forgotten that she tried to provide me with the worst
wardrobe on purpose.
My hand dropped to my side, suddenly feeling bereft without his heat beneath my palm. His
narrowed eyes were pinned to my mouth, and I was suddenly conscious that I had some remnants of
pastry stuck to my lips. I swiped my tongue across them, tasting the slight sweetness left behind from
Jen’s treats. His eyes flared, and his own lips parted on a heavy exhale, his warm breath caressing my
cheeks.
We were caught up in our own little bubble, the world shrinking to just the two of us. The space
between us felt charged, and my own breaths came faster as he sucked his bottom lip between his
teeth.
What I wouldn’t give to be that lip right now!
The forgotten intruder made her presence known as she stormed past, widening the gap between
us. I moved my bulk out of the way, twisting around so she didn’t knock into my precious cargo. Her
retreating form stripped off the shirt and dropped it casually on the floor at Robert’s feet, her naked
body bared in all its glory as she stood at the entrance to the cabin, the sunlight highlighting every dip
and curve. With her hand placed on her hip, she turned to the object of her affection. “When will you
be home?”
Her toned body stood out in stark contrast to my weight. Yes, I was pregnant and growing a whole
new life inside of me, but when she stood there looking like a goddess with her perky breasts and
perfect skin, not a stretch mark in sight, there was a curdling in my stomach. A stabbing ache of
jealousy contrasted with the longing for the woman I used to be instead of this… this whale.
Robert shifted in my field of vision, but shockingly, he wasn’t gawking at the stunning woman
right in front of him. His face was turned in the opposite direction, his eyes not making contact with
the bare breasts that swayed before him. “We will be gone for three days. I am sure you can manage
the pack for that long,” he muttered.
Her smug smirk grew sour when he refused to look at her, and no matter how hard she tried, he
didn’t turn his head.
He was right. He really was from a different time.
Most men, at least every one I’d met, would be gaping like a schoolboy looking at his first porn
magazine with that display.
But not Robert.
His entire body was stone, tension and awkwardness radiating from him. The only time his
shoulders fell from almost ear-height was when Lexi huffed in annoyance and stomped away from
him.
Her back rippled and curved as she dropped to her hands and knees and shifted. She made it look
effortless, beautiful. A merging of woman and animal until the only thing left was a majestic, russet
wolf.
I barely remembered my first - and only - shift. But I remember pain in the deep recesses of my
memory. Yet, she never once flinched away from the change that seemed to move like a tidal wave
over her.
The Lycan shook her fur out, her muscles quivering beneath her coat. With a yip in our direction,
that I had no hope of translating, she took off into the heart of pack lands, a blur of coppery-brown that
blended into the scenery until there was nothing left except her shirt.
“I am sorry for that display, little flower.”
My belly flipped the same way it did earlier when he called me that, but this time it came with a
hint of dismay. I couldn’t change that way yet, and even if I could, who is to say that I would make a
good Lycan? I was terrible at sports in school, I never ran anywhere, not even for the bus. I would
rather wait in the rain for the next one to come along than put that kind of pressure on my body.
Robert was fully focused on me, his discomfort vanished with the nudity. “It’s fine, you don’t have
to apologise for her, she’s just guarding her territory I suppose?”
His brows lowered, confusion creasing his face. “I am not her territory, Lily.”
“Not you,” I declared, waving my hand around, “but this whole place.”
He sighed, an almost defeated look overtaking him. “They need me to control the savages. They
tolerate my rule here despite their fear of me.” He raked his hair back, his hand fisting the ends. “But
they hate that I have that power, Lily. I see the way they look at me when I issue an order, they want to
deny it, deny me. And sometimes…” His deep sigh came with a longing look towards where the
Lycan just ran. “Sometimes I want to go back to my little cabin deep in the woods, going back to
being the ignorant man that I was.” The distant longing was evident in his stare, and the whispered
words were almost dragged from him, as if he hated sharing something so private.
“It’s ok to want that for yourself. But is it partly because you don’t look like them?” I questioned.
“She looks like a larger than average wolf, but you… you’re -”
“Wrong? Abnormal… Cursed?”
“That’s not what I was about to say,” I huffed. “Don’t put words into my mouth.”
“I smelled your fear the first time you saw me, you stepped into the arms of your
captor -”
“You forget that I’d never seen anything at all like you, so of course I was scared. I’m a pregnant
woman, kidnapped, practically starved and emotionally abused for months. I would have been stupid
not to fear you.”
Anger sparked from his cerulean eyes, the way it always did when I mentioned my time with the
Sallows.
“You see, you’re angry on my behalf. That means you’re not scary at all.” Looping my arm through
his, I gently tried pulling him away from the door. “I’m hungry, Robert, and the baby is letting me
know in the most acrobatic way possible.”
His face softened, the crinkles at the corners of his eyes branched out with his small smile. “May
I?” His hand hovered above my belly, asking for permission to feel the turbulent child kicking up a
storm.
Taking his large hand within mine, I placed it in the exact spot my little warrior’s foot was
connecting with my side. Oof, he was showing off today. Robert’s thumb stroked the tight skin beneath
my dress, the heat from his touch burning a hole through the material. Awareness sizzled across my
skin. It wasn’t just his hand, it was how close he was. His tall frame towered over me, his hot breath
caressed my cheek. And yet, he was oblivious to my need, his entire focus on the movement of my
unborn child.
A sharp kick straight into my rib had me gasping and leaning into his touch, an almost plea for him
to rub the pain away.
“Come.” His arm wrapped around me leading me to the sofa, using it as a support as he lowered
me to the comfy cushions. I leaned back trying to stretch out and give the baby as much space as
possible to move. My belly undulated, while Robert stood there enraptured.
Lowering to his knees in front of me, unbridled fascination flickered across his face. It’s almost as
if he’d never seen something so natural before. My heart fluttered in my chest as he studied my
rounded stomach. Palms outreached, yet he didn’t put his hand back. There was so much awe and
admiration in his widening gaze that tears filled my eyes at his devotion. He stared at me—at us—me
and my bump as if we were a comet burning through the sky. Like it was a once-in-a-lifetime
opportunity. He never had it in him to blink and neither did I. Nobody had ever stared at me that way
before, with eyes so full of wonder. I wanted to imprint this moment into my memory for all of time
because there was something so special about it. So wholesome, that my first tear fell. I had been
dead set on doing this by myself, I never expected to have someone - a man especially - take interest
in us. I’d been fully invested and resigned to a life of single parenting.
But what if?
What if, with this stunning man sitting in front of me, captivated with my unborn baby, there was a
Another random document with
no related content on Scribd:
 Improvised apparatus may be used, but it requires much more labor and is not as
satisfactory.
All milk should be sterilized or pasteurized before being used as a food for infants.
The following table shows an analysis of milks and infant foods helpful in the
selection of a food to supply deficiencies indicated by a chemical analysis of the infant.
COMPARATIVE ANALYSIS OF MILKS AND INFANT FOODS (COMPILED)
(Percentage of Composition of the Dry Substance)
Borden’s Mellin’s Eskay’s
Borden’s Horlick’s Nestle’s
Mother’s Cow’s Condensed Food Food
COMPONENTS Malted Malted Food (Milk
Milk Milk Milk (Eagle (Milk (Milk
Milk Milk Substitute)
Brand) Modifier) Modifier)
Protein 14.00 27.00 15.10 13.83 10.10 12.40 12.10 6.82
Fat 31.00 31.00 9.20 7.90 12.10 4.15 0.25 3.58
Cane-Sugar None None None None 59.1 22.10 None None
Other Soluble
Carbohydrates
52.00[18] 36.00[18] 69.77[19] 66.56[19] 16.0[18] 35.00[19] 84.00[19] 56.78[20]
(Lactose,
Maltose, etc.)
Starch None None None None None 25.70 None 30.42
Ash (Mineral
2.00 5.00 3.46 3.42 2.4 1.62 3.78 1.00
Content)

The following table from Holt shows at a glance the comparative average
composition of human and cow’s milk:
HUMAN AND COW’S MILK COMPARED
Human Milk Cow’s Milk
Fat 4% 4%
Sugar 7% 4.5%
Proteins 1.5% 3.5%
Salts 0.2% 0.75%
Water 87.30% 87.25%
Total 100.00% 100.00%

Barley, rice, oatmeal, corn meal and soy-bean flour are

generally used. If the grains of the cereals are used, they must Gruels
be cooked from three to four hours.
As a rule, cereal gruels are made by cooking the flour and water for from fifteen to
twenty minutes. Two ounces to the quart is about as strong as plain gruels can be
made.
 Dextrinized gruels may be made as high as eight ounces to the quart. Four level
tablespoonfuls of the cereal flour weigh one ounce.
As the soy bean contains no starch, it does not thicken when cooking.
About 1 level tablespoonful to 3 ounces of soy-bean flour are used to the quart. One
or 2 tablespoonfuls of barley, oat, or wheat gruel may be added before cooking to
increase the nutritive value. One ounce of soy-bean flour, or 2 ounces of barley flour,
to 1 quart of water makes a very good standard gruel. It contains 2 per cent. protein,
0.6 per cent. fat, 5.1 per cent. carbohydrates, giving a food value of ten calories per
ounce, just one-half the value of milk. In certain forms of intestinal trouble in which
cow’s milk is not assimilated, this gruel is valuable used with condensed milk.
Malted gruels are made by adding 1 teaspoonful of good malt extract or diastase to
a cereal gruel after it has been cooled. It should be stirred in very thoroughly.

In artificial feeding “spitting” is usually an annoying symptom

Vomiting that does not indicate anything more serious than an overloaded
stomach. This condition is usually relieved by lengthening the
feeding intervals to four hours.
On the other hand, vomiting usually indicates something more serious in a bottle-fed
baby, especially if it is very persistent. It is usually a sign that cow’s milk, or the
preparation of it, is not agreeing with the infant. It also indicates a digestive
disturbance that should be treated only by the physician, who will probably change the
formula.
Occasional vomiting is sometimes due to too rich food and too frequent feeding.
Lengthening the feeding hours and decreasing the amount of fat in the mixture will
usually eliminate the trouble.

This is the most common of all of baby’s troubles. It is often

Colic due to too rapid feeding either from the breast or bottle, and
when there is a tendency to colic, the feeding should be slower.
The baby should not be fed while it is suffering from colic, even though it seems that
the drinking of warm milk relieves it temporarily. Hot water should be given every half-
hour or hour until relieved. If the baby seems cold, hot water slightly sweetened, and a
hot bath, should be given at once. A hot-water bottle may be placed near it as well.
In colic there is severe pain in the abdomen, which is swollen and hard. Sudden and
violent crying is usually a symptom of colic, which often ceases very suddenly after the
emission of gas from the mouth or bowels.
If the baby seems exhausted, the physician should be summoned at once, but these
suggestions may be helpful until the physician arrives.
 When colic is very frequent in a bottle-fed baby, the food should be modified.

The character of the stools depends primarily on the

composition of the food. They are varied according to the The Stools in
digestive powers of the infant, and according to the amount and Infancy
rapidity of absorption of the products of digestion. The amount of
absorption depends to a considerable extent on the rapidity with which the contents
pass through the intestinal tract.

The nature of the food, of course, influences the character of the stools. The
examination of the stools is of the greatest aid in determining whether or not any given
food element is properly digested and assimilated, and, in many diseased conditions,
in telling what element is at fault. This, however, can only be determined by analysis,
but a little information on this subject will be of value to the mother or nurse.
During the first few weeks or months of life, the breast-fed infant has three or four
stools daily. These are of about the consistency of thick pea soup and are golden
yellow. The number of stools gradually diminishes to two or three in the twenty-four
hours, and the consistency becomes more salve-like.
It is not uncommon for thriving breast-fed babies to have a large number of stools of
diminished consistency and of a brownish color; in such instances, the examination of
the breast milk will show that the proteins are high.
It is best not to pay too much attention to the stools if the baby is gaining in weight
and appears well. It is not unusual to find many soft fine curds and sometimes mucus
in the stools of healthy breast-fed babies.
It is not only unnecessary, but decidedly wrong to wean a baby simply because the
stools are abnormal, if it is doing well in other ways. The breast-fed infant will often go
weeks or months without a normal stool and yet thrive perfectly. On the other hand, if
a baby has such stools when it is taking cow’s milk it is a decided evidence of
malnutrition.
Infants that are thriving on cow’s milk have, as a general rule, fewer movements in
the twenty-four hours than do breast-fed babies and these movements are firmer in
consistency.

Constipation seems to be the chief difficulty in artificial feeding,

Constipation due usually to the poor absorption of fat, or the low percentage
necessary to prevent indigestion. If the constipation is not
severe, the substitution of oatmeal for barley water in the mixture will usually relieve
the trouble.
If the constipation is severe, causing occasional attacks of colic or straining at stool,
it is sometimes advisable to give a little higher percentage of fat in the mixture, but this
should be done very cautiously and usually on the advice of the physician.
If, however, this does not relieve the trouble, the best plan is to substitute one of the
dextrin-maltose mixtures for milk-sugar or cane-sugar. The malt itself is not especially
laxative but it prevents the excessive fermentation which usually occurs when the
bowels are very costive.

Two, three, or more green and loose evacuations, even though

they may contain whitish particles of undigested fat, are of no Diarrhea
great significance in the breast-fed infant, but should be regarded
as danger signals in bottle-fed babies.
Even a mild attack of diarrhea is usually a symptom of fat-dyspepsia which, if taken
in time, may usually be promptly checked.
A dose of castor-oil at the beginning of the attack may relieve any irritation that
might have caused the trouble.
It is best to omit all food for at least twenty-four hours. Plain water should be given
very freely and occasionally barley water, if the baby is hungry. After that it is best to
start with a mixture low in fat. Skimmed milk or boiled milk free from all fat, diluted with
cereal water, may be given at regular intervals.
Should slight diarrheal attacks continue, or should the stools be of a diarrheal
character, the wisest plan is to substitute a dextrin-maltose mixture for the sugar, as
malt decidedly favors fat absorption.
In almost every case of infantile diarrhea it is advisable to consult the physician,
especially if there is considerable restlessness and rise in temperature.
Diarrhea is more frequent in summer among bottle-fed babies, as the heat often
promotes the growth of germs in the milk. Therefore to sterilize or pasteurize milk
during the heated months is especially necessary.
A chill, due to insufficient clothing, will sometimes cause diarrhea. The abdomen,
arms, and legs should be kept warm by close-fitting garments of soft wool.

In treating anemia in infants, as in adults, the cause should be

Anemia removed by correcting any errors in diet and treating any other
physical deficiencies.
The cause of infantile anemia is an insufficient absorption of iron from the food.
 The amount of iron in both human milk and cow’s milk is small and is insufficient for
the needs of the growing infant. However, Nature has deposited enough iron in the
liver of the new-born infant to last until it can digest foods which contain iron in
sufficient amounts. The iron in human milk is apparently more easily retained than that
in the milk of animals.
The iron content of human milk is dependent on the general condition of the mother.
It is higher in healthy individuals and lower in those under par.
Anemia in infants is apt to become severe and often take on a pernicious form. A
prolonged intestinal disturbance often brings on anemia, and not infrequently anemia
is due to a deficiency of protein in the food.
The treatment consists largely of additions or changes in the diet, depending on the
age of the infant. Purées of vegetables that contain much iron, such as spinach and
carrots, and also fruit juices, are valuable and in proper proportions can be added to
the diet after the age of six months. It is best that the physician decide on the
advisability of this as it will depend on the general condition of the infant.

Rickets, a chronic impairment of nutrition, affects not only the

bones, but all of the tissues of the body, particularly the nervous Rickets
system. Artificial feeding is the chief cause of rickets on account
of the poor absorption of fats, and often because of protein starvation.
Prepared foods, on account of their large percentage of starch and their lack of
protein and butter-fat are frequently the cause of rickets.
In addition to its fuel value, milk-fat contains the elements which promote growth.
As previously stated, the infant requires a certain percentage of protein, fat, and
mineral for the blood and tissue building and the growth of the bones. In artificial
feeding, the preparations given are often deficient in these important elements.
Climate and poor hygienic surroundings sometimes cause rickets in breast-fed
babies, probably on account of the lowered vitality of the mother and the child and
consequently poor digestion and assimilation, but it is most frequently found in babies
improperly fed.
Dr. Winfield S. Hall says:
Fresh milk, appropriately modified and in proper amount, together with such other
food as is indicated for the age and weight, is the important point in the treatment of
rickets. Fresh air, day and night, sunshine and outdoor life, are only next in happiness.
Cod-liver oil, especially with the addition of phosphorus, is a very valuable addition to
the treatment.

Rickets is a chronic condition, while scurvy is an acute disease.

 This difficulty is considered as entirely due to improper feeding
Scurvy and therefore must be overcome by a change of diet. Recovery
is usually very rapid when the child is properly fed.
Pains and tenderness about the joints, particularly of the legs, are the usual
symptoms, causing the baby to cry when it is lifted or moved about. The gums
sometimes become swollen and bleed. In almost every case it is found that infants
suffering from scurvy have been on a continuous diet of prepared foods like malted
milk, condensed milk, or boiled milk which Dr. Hall terms “dead food,” presumably on
account of a lack of the life-giving proteins and butter-fat.
When boiled milk has been used, the change should be made to pasteurized milk or
raw milk if it can be secured clean and fresh. If prepared foods have been given, the
amount should be greatly decreased and replaced by a cow’s-milk preparation in
which a small percentage of the prepared food may be included, or, better still, omitted
entirely, if a cow’s-milk preparation including a good substantial gruel will agree.
In scurvy, orange juice or other fruit juices should be given, from 1 to 4 ounces a
day, according to the age. Orange juice is particularly valuable, 2 or 3 teaspoonfuls
being given before each feeding.
A lack of fresh air often aids in producing scurvy.

After the baby has reached the age of one year, we often feel
that it is not necessary to be so careful of its diet. However, the Feeding during the
number of deaths due to digestive disturbances caused by Second Year
improper feeding during the second year is significant.
After the child is a year old it should be given solid food very gradually to develop its
digestive functions as well as its teeth. A soft-boiled egg or a little beef juice may be
added to the diet. Until the appearance of the anterior molar teeth, however, the child’s
diet should be confined largely to milk. A thin slice of buttered bread or a little plain
rice or rice pudding, a soda cracker or bread crumbs in milk may be given. The year-
old child may also begin to drink cow’s milk. One or two glasses a day may be given,
until the child is at least 13 or 14 years old.
Good judgment should be used in feeding children, as habits and tastes are being
formed, and whether they are normal or abnormal will depend on the kind of food
given and when.
Four meals a day, at regular intervals, and nothing but water between these
intervals, is considered the best plan.
Dry toast, zwieback, and crackers may be gradually added to the diet, also well-
cooked cereals, like cream of wheat, rice, and oatmeal. The oatmeal should be
strained the first few months it is given. Very little sugar should be added to the
cereals, as children very quickly cultivate a desire for sweets, rejecting other more
nourishing foods, and too much sugar is apt to disturb the digestion. It is best during
the first few months that no sugar be added to cereals.
The amount of whole milk, or milk diluted with barley or oatmeal gruel, should be
limited to one quart when the other foods are given.
Beef juice (from one to two ounces), mutton broth, chicken broth, and cereal broths
may be given after the age of one year; not more than two ounces at first, gradually
increasing in a few months’ time to four ounces. This is best given at the beginning of
the noon feeding. These broths have little nutritive value, but usually stimulate the
appetite for other foods.
The child must build muscle, bone, and sinew, and more protein is required as soon
as he begins to walk. Milk, eggs, and cereals will furnish this. The heavier protein diet
is best given at eighteen months to two years, in eggs, cooked soft. An egg may be
given every other day, soft boiled for about two minutes, or coddled for four minutes.
At the age of two years an egg may be given every day. These soft-cooked eggs are
best when mixed with broken dry toast or broken whole wheat or Graham crackers,
because if dry food is served with them they will be better masticated, hence more
saliva be mixed with them.
The habit of thorough mastication should be cultivated at this period.
Oatmeal, thoroughly cooked, and shredded wheat, with cream and sugar, ripe fruit,
bread and butter, milk, soft-cooked eggs (poached or boiled), constitute a rational diet
at this age.
Bread is better broken in milk because the chewing movements mix the saliva with
the milk and smaller curds are formed as the milk enters the stomach.
Custard may after two years be added to the diet, also baked or mashed potato,
plain boiled macaroni, also a little butter on the potato, toast, or bread.
Also after the age of eighteen months, a small quantity of very lean meat, like
scraped or chopped beef or lamb, or finely minced chicken, may be given once a day.
Also well-cooked and mashed vegetables like peas, spinach, carrots, and
asparagus tips. For the first few months these should be strained.
Some fruit should also be given each day, orange juice, apple sauce, or the pulp of
stewed prunes; the latter especially is valuable when the bowels are inclined to be
constipated.
Tea, coffee, and cocoa are absolutely objectionable, and before the age of two
years no kind of candy should be given.
One of the most important things to teach the child, when it is taking foods other
than milk, is thorough mastication, not only to assist the proper growth of the teeth, but
to prevent the digestive disturbances that invariably occur from the bolting of food, and
children are especially liable to do this.
Dry toast and zwieback compel mastication and strengthen the gums. These should
be given in the hand, a piece at mealtime and occasionally between meals, if the child
seems hungry. The child will then gradually get into the habit of chewing other solid
foods when they are given.
If the child is hungry between meals, he should be fed at a regular period, midway
between breakfast and luncheon and between luncheon and the evening meal. The
food should be dry (toast or a dry cracker) to induce thorough and slow mastication.
Many object to “piecing” between meals, but if this piecing be done at hours as
regular as his meal hour, and the food be dry and well masticated, it will readily digest
and will not interfere with his meals. The growing child needs more frequent meals
than the adult. His stomach is not so large, he is active in outdoor exercise, and
eliminates waste freely. He also requires much heat and energy. The active child at
outdoor play uses almost as much energy as the laboring man.
Many mothers are in doubt as to whether the baby’s food should be salted. It is
necessary to add a very little salt to the food for the baby; broths should be seasoned
slightly and a pinch of salt added to potatoes and eggs. Cereals and vegetables are
cooked in water to which a little salt has been added.
Experienced observers of children and their ailments and diseases have said that
more babies are killed by overfeeding than by underfeeding. Especially in summer,
when the child’s condition reflects that of the mother, too much food will cause
indigestion, irritation of the stomach, and diarrhea.
Often the child is fretful because it is too warm or is thirsty. It will often be benefited
by giving it less food and more water. This fretful mind affects the child’s digestion just
as it affects the digestion of the mother.
If a healthy child refuses good, wholesome food because it wishes some other than
what is offered it, it is not hungry and doesn’t need the food.
The growing child craves sweets, but a child should not be given candy whenever it
wants it during the day. Candy or sugar is quickly converted into heat and is best
eaten immediately following a meal. Sugar may be spread on bread for the four
o’clock lunch or a little candy may be eaten at this time. Two or three pieces of candy
an inch square are sufficient.

FOOTNOTES:

[18] All lactose (milk-sugar).

[19] Mostly maltose (a hard, crystalline sugar formed by the action of malt on
starch).
[20] Mostly lactose.
 APPENDIX

MEASURES AND WEIGHTS

A few tables of measures may be helpful here because accurate

measurements are necessary to insure success in the preparation of
any article of food.
All dry ingredients, such as flour, meal, powdered sugar, etc.,
should be sifted before measuring.
The standard measuring cup contains one-half pint and is divided
into fourths and thirds.
To measure a cupful or spoonful of dry ingredients, fill the cup or
spoon and then level off with the back of a case-knife.
In measures of weight the gram is the unit.
A “heaping cupful” is a level cup with two tablespoonfuls added.
A “scant cupful” is a level cup with two tablespoonfuls taken out.
A “saltspoon” is one-fourth of a level teaspoon.
To measure butter, lard, and other solid foods, pack solidly in
spoon or cup and level with a knife.
TABLE OF MEASURES AND WEIGHTS[21]
4 saltspoons = 1 teaspoon, tsp.
3 teaspoons = 1 tablespoon, tbsp.
4 tablespoons = 1/4 cup or 1/2 gill.
16 tablespoons (dry ingredients) = 1 cup, c.
12 tablespoons (liquid) = 1 cup.
2 gills = 1 cup.
2 cups = 1 pint.
2 pints = 1 quart.
4 quarts = 1 gallon.
2 tablespoons butter = 1 ounce.
1 tablespoon melted butter = 1 ounce.
4 tablespoons flour = 1 ounce.
2 tablespoons granulated sugar = 1 ounce.
2 tablespoons liquid = 1 ounce.
2 tablespoons powdered lime = 1 ounce.
1 cup of stale bread crumbs = 2 ounces.
1 square Baker’s unsweetened chocolate = 1 ounce.
Juice of one lemon = (about) 3 tablespoons.
5 tablespoons liquid = 1 wineglassful.
4 cups of sifted flour = 1 pound.
2 cups of butter (packed solidly) = 1 pound.
2 cups of finely chopped meat (packed solidly) = 1 pound.
2 cups of granulated sugar = 1 pound.
22/5 cups of powdered sugar = 1 pound.
22/3 cups brown sugar = 1 pound.
22/3 cups oatmeal = 1 pound.
43/4 cups rolled oats = 1 pound.
9 or 10 eggs = 1 pound.
1 cup of rice = 1/2 pound.
APOTHECARIES’ WEIGHTS[22]
20 grains = 1 scruple, ℈
3 scruples = 1 drachm, ʒ
8 drachms (or 480 grains) = 1 ounce, ℥
12 ounces = 1 pound, lb.
APOTHECARIES’ MEASURES[22]
60 minims (M) = 1 fluid drachm, fʒ
8 fluid drachms = 1 fluid ounce, f℥
16 fluid ounces = 1 pint, o or pt.
2 pints = 1 quart, qt.
4 quarts = 1 gallon, gal.
APPROXIMATE MEASURES[23]
One teaspoonful equals about 1 fluid drachm.
One dessertspoonful equals about 2 fluid drachms.
One tablespoonful equals about 4 fluid drachms.
One wineglassful equals about 2 ounces.
One cup (one-half pint) equals about 8 ounces.
METRIC MEASURES OF WEIGHT[23]
In measures of weight the gram is the unit.
1 gram 1.0 gm.
1 decigram 0.1 gm.
1 centigram 0.01 gm.
1 milligram 0.001 gm.

FOOTNOTES:

[21] Practical Dietetics, Alida Frances Pattee.

[22] Practical Dietetics, Alida Frances Pattee.
[23] Practical Dietetics, Alida Frances Pattee.
 INDEX

Absorption of food, 145

Achlorhydria, 258
Acne, 295
Adulteration of foods, 118
Age, 165
Diet in, 230
Affecting digestion, 165
Albumin, 10
Albumin water, 309
Albuminoids, 12, 56
Alcohol, 184
Alkalies, 45
Almond oil, 25
Anemia, 37, 245-250
Appetite, affecting digestion, 160, 161, 163, 164
Apples, 47, 49, 51
Apricots, 47
Arrowroot, 20
Asparagus, 43, 44
Asthma, 282
Athlete, diet for, 228

Baking soda, 136

Balanced diets, 232
Bananas, 48, 49-50
Barley, 74
Barley water, 310
Beans, 43, 82, 85-86
Beef, 53, 54
Beets, 39, 41
Beverages, 103-109
Bile, 144
Biliousness, 267
Biscuits, 68
Blackberries, 48
Blood, affecting digestion, 157
Bouillons, 57
Boy or girl, diet for, 226-228
Bread, 66
Bread and crackers, 61, 62
Graham bread
Rye bread
Wheat bread
Graham crackers
Oatmeal ”
Oyster ”
Soda ”
Breakfast foods, 72-80
Breathing, 3
Blight’s disease, 272
Brussels sprouts, 43
Business man, diet for, 224
Butter, 89
Buttermilk, 89, 101

Cabbage, 44
Caffein, 106
Calcium, 4, 6, 34, 36, 59
Calories, 127-129
Candy, 15-16
Carbohydrates, 13
Carbon, 4, 122
Carbon dioxid, 20
Carbonaceous foods, 4, 9, 10, 38-53
Carbonaceous foodstuffs, 13-25
Carbo-nitrogenous foods, 9, 61-102
Carrots, 39, 41
Casein, 90
Cassava, 20
Catarrh of intestines, 264
Catarrh of stomach, 253
Celery, 43, 44
Cells, formation of, 1, 2
Cellulose, 45
Cereal coffees, 80-81
Cereals, 61-80
Cheese, 89, 100
Cherries, 47
Chicken, 57
Chlorin, 4
Chocolate, 108
Chorea, 291
Circulation affecting digestion, 181
Citrates, 45
Citric acid, 45
Citrus fruits, 216
Clams, 55
Classification of foods, 38-102
Carbonaceous, 38-53
Fruits, 45
Green vegetables, 42
Roots and tubers, 38
Carbo-nitrogenous foods, 61-102
Cereals, 61
Legumes, 82
Milk, 89
Nitrogenous foods, 53-59
Eggs, 58
Meat, 53
Cocoa, 108
Cod-liver oil, 24
Coffee, 106-107
Condiments, 109-111
Capers
Catsup
Cinnamon
Ginger
Horseradish
Mustard
Pepper
Salt
 Spices
Tabasco sauce
Worcestershire sauce
Constipation, 96, 97, 262
Convalescent, feeding the, 302
Cooking, 185-199
Corn, 71
Cornstarch, 10
Cotton-seed oil, 24
Crabs, 55
Cranberries, 48
Cream, 89
Cucumbers, 43
Currants, 48, 52
Custards, 314, 315

Dates, 48
Diabetes, 279
Diet, in abnormal conditions, 242-304
In age, 230, 231
For athlete, 228
For boy or girl, 226-228
For business man, 224
For laboring man, 229-230
In sedentary occupation, 222-224
In traveling, 213
Mixed, versus vegetable, 210
Diets, 216-231
Digestion, 133-150
Intestinal, 143
 Salivary, 135
Stomach, 140
Dilatation of the stomach, 259
Diuretic foods, 126
Dysentery, 265
Dyspepsia, 250

Economy in food, 148

Eczema, 294
Effervescing waters, 109
Eggnog, 60, 308
Egg preparations, 308
Eggs, 58
Elimination, 2, 130-133
Energy, 2, 13, 120-129
Enteritis, 264
Epithelium, 136
Exercise, 2
Exercise and breathing affecting digestion, 171-174

Fatigue, 174
Fats, 13, 21-25, 58, 59
Almond oil
Butter
Cod-liver oil
Cotton-seed oil
Cream
Meat fat
Nut oils
Olive oils
Figs, 48
Fish, 54, 55, 58
Flaxseed tea, 276
Flour and meals, 62-65, 73, 74
Bran
Corn
Gluten
Graham
Nutri meal
Oatmeal
Wheat
Whole wheat
Food elements, 3, 8, 9
Foodstuffs, 8-10
Frequency of meals affecting digestion, 169
Fruits, 45-53
Bland, 47
Dates
Figs
Prunes
Raisins
Sweet, 47
Apples
Bananas
Blackberries
Blueberries
Grapes
Peaches
Pears
Plums
Raspberries
Fruit juices, 305
Fruit sugar (levulose), 14, 15
Gallstones, 269
Gastritis, 253
Gelatinoids, 12, 56
Glucose, 10, 15, 16, 40
Gluten, 5, 10
Glycerin, 22
Glycogen, 16, 21, 151
Gooseberries, 47
Gout, 277
Grapefruit, 46
Grape juice, 307
Grapes, 48, 50
Greens, 43
Gruels, 314, 317
Gum-chewing, 139

Ham, 54
Heat and energy, 3, 120-129
Hives, 293
Honey, 10, 15
Hydrochloric acid, 34, 35, 46, 140
Hydrogen, 4
Hyperchlorhydria, 257
Hypochlorhydria, 257

Ice-cream, 115
Improperly balanced diet, 221
Indigestion, 250
Mental effect on, 135
Nervous, 252
Infant feeding, 320-356
Influence of mind, 177-178
Insufficient diet, effect of, vii
Intestinal disorders, 262
Intestinal indigestion, 143
Intestines, work of, 141-148
Invalids, foods for, 305
Iron, 4, 37, 59
Itching, 295

Jellies, 313, 314

Junket, 102, 314

Kidneys, derangements of, 271

Affecting digestion, 155, 160
Kumyss, 98

Laboring man, diet for, 229-230

Lactose, 15
Leanness, 298
Legumes, 63, 82-87
Beans
Lentils
Peanuts
Peas
Lemonade, 60, 108, 306
Lemons, 46, 48