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 Module 6
Communicating Electronically
Electronic messages are permanent and can be universally shared. Furthermore, e-messages lack
all the subtle symbols—facial expressions, gestures, tone, posture, use of space—we use to
negotiate meaning. Therefore, composing effective electronic messages necessitates the same
careful analysis (PAIBOC), and the same processes (revising, editing) as any other “for-the-
record” writing.

Module Learning Objectives

After reading Module 6, students will be familiar with

• Business e-communication practices
• Formatting business messages
• Social media for business basics

By applying the information, students will be able to

• Apply PAIBOC analysis to business messages
• Choose the best medium for their message

What’s in This Supplement?

• Part 1: Key Lecture Points, Teaching Tips, and In-Class Exercises

• Part 2: Answers to Textbook Assignments

Part 1: Key Lecture Points, Teaching Tips, and In-Class Exercises

What Do I Need to Know About E-Communicating?

When you post, you’re published.

Businesses that provide email to employees are legally entitled to monitor employee email
messages. Electronic messages and printed email have been used as legal evidence. And,
although police need a “special wiretap order” to obtain private texts, and a search warrant to
retrieve cellphone data, all e-messages can be shared anytime with anyone
(http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/2013/03/27/canada-supreme-court-text-
messages_n_2961046.html).

And many writers pay little or no attention to spelling and grammar in personal email and text
messages, although these mechanics remain important in the business world.

Teaching Tip: Generate a discussion on McLuhan’s adage – the medium is the

message. Encourage students to talk about their preferences when using Pinterest,
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 Instagram and Snapchat. What about watching a movie or video on their smartphone
versus in the theatre? What about a personal conversation or disagreement? Ghosting
(http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/10/30/ghosting-dating-_n_6028958.html)?

In the electronic age is it true that context is everything: do audience expectations

determine medium, form and content?

Emphasize that in business

• All the principles of good business writing apply to email and electronic messages
• While texting and emailing may feel like talking, writers must still pay attention to their
audiences’ expectations
• Writers should proofread business messages before sending them
• Email messages should interest the readers in the subject line and first paragraph.

Teaching Tip: Ask students whether they prefer to send email messages or to text . And
how often do they tweet, and why? What is it about one form versus the other that appeals
to them? In a typical week, how many of one type of message do they send versus the
others? How has this changed the method and frequency of their written communication?

In-Class Exercise: Ask students to share some of their frustrations in sending and
receiving texts and email. Together with students, create a master standards list of
communication behaviours they would encourage senders to follow. As receivers, what
could they do to encourage people to send more appropriate messages? What frustrations
do they have with email? With texting?

When Do I Use Email?

Use email when it serves your purposes and meets your audience’s needs.

As of the writing of this edition, email and phone conversations continue to be business
standards for communicating with customers. Business users consider email more formal than
texts, and easier to track, file and retrieve. Use email when
• Email is standard organizational practice, and/or
• Your audience expects or prefers it, and or
• Email is the optimum tool for your message

As is always true, writers make the best decisions about media, content, word choice and
organizational pattern based on their PAIBOC analysis (Figure 6.1).
Business emails should be as correct as any written document. Whenever they can, proficient
writers ask a peer to proof their messages (Module 4).

How Do I Format Email Messages?

Follow organizational formats, or use a software template.

Many organizations use standard formats for their e-messages. Students can also use software
and email programs that provide formats they can customize.
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 Teaching Tip: Follow the guidelines in this book for all class messages you send/post to
your students and expect students to do the same for messages they submit to you.

People prefer email messages that acknowledge them politely; hence, it’s current to begin emails
message with a salutation: Hi or Hello (Name), Good Morning (Name). A salutation is
particularly important for readers whose cultures value courtesy and formality. (See Module 2:
How Do I Use Audience Analysis? and Module 3: How Does Culture Affect Business
Communication?)
The writer in Figure 6.2 ends the message with all his contact information, but writers can
choose to type only their name. These conventions depend on the writer’s relationship with the
reader and the assumptions and expectations of the organizational culture.
Responders should change the subject line to reflect their message. If the discourse community
sorts messages by threads, writers can include the original one in parentheses.

How Do I Organize Email Messages?

Organize to meet readers’ expectations.

Because they have to deal with so many electronic messages daily, people need to be able to
recognize, read, and respond to emails rapidly. The writer’s responsibility is to meet that need.

Teaching Tip: Begin the discussion about making conscious communication choices
by asking students how they do decide on organizing a message. What should come
first and why? Modules 7 through 9 focus specifically on audience-centred
organizational patterns.
The information in Figure 6.2 presents a direct (or good news) pattern, although doing as the
writer asks may actually “cost” the reader some time. The email content suggests that this is a
follow-up message to a conversation or to other emails/letters and that the request underlines
standard operational procedure for the construction employees.
For the recipient in Figure 6.3, the message is direct because it is good news: he is getting what
he ordered and, if through Amazon.ca, probably with alacrity.
In comparison, Figures 6.4 and 6.5 demonstrate the indirect (or bad news) pattern. In both
emails, the writer softens the “bad news” by starting with a buffer “Thank you…” and ending
positively.
The differences between the draft and revised emails (Figures 6.6 and 6.7) asking for feedback
demonstrate how PAIBOC analysis – and revising and editing – can create clear, concise and
reader-friendly messages.
Modules 7 through 9 focus specifically on audience-centred organizational patterns.

What Subject Lines Do I Use for Emails?

Use subject lines that are concise and relevant.
Because people are bombarded with electronic messages, it’s important to attract readers with a

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concise and relevant subject line.

Teaching Tip: Ask students for the logic of creating a subject line after they have
written and revised the message. A neutral subject line for a negative message
provides content orientation without delivering the bad news upfront– and avoids
upsetting the reader before s/he has a chance to read the rationale for the negative
(Module 8).

When Do I Use Attachments?

Send attachments when your PAIBOC analysis tells you that they meet the needs of your
audience.

People routinely send attachments based on their purposes and audiences. Attachments can
include
• A business letter or report
• A long text document
• A text document with extensive formatting
• A non-text file (e.g., PowerPoint slides, HTML file, spreadsheet)
In-Class Exercise: Ask students when and why they send attachments. How do
they draw readers’ attention to the attachment? When do they delete attachments
without opening them? How do they stay virus-free?

When Do I Text?
Text when your PAIBOC analysis determines it’s the best medium for your
message.

Texting has not yet replaced email’s dominance in business communication.

In-Class Exercise: Put students in small groups and ask them to discuss:When is
it appropriate to text a business message? How should they organize the information?
Why? (Refer to Jacob Nielson’s “above the fold” information in Figure 5.10: according
to usability experts, readers do not bother scrolling to retrieve information. The important
part of the message should appear on the first screen.)When is it appropriate to use
shorthand or emoticons and to omit salutations and signatures? How does writers’ choice
of medium tell their audience almost as much about them as the content does?

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When Do I Use Social Media?
Choose specific social media for business messages only when it is professionally
appropriate.

Currently social media are used in external business communications primarily as branding and
marketing tools. Many organizations use social media applications to facilitate internal business
communications.

In-Class Exercise: Ask students to recount how they have used or use SM in their
workplaces. Who blogs or has blogged for business? Who has used any internal SM
app like HipChat, Slack, or Microsoft Lync, for example? What other SM apps for business
examples can students provide? What are the advantages? What are the
disadvantages?

What Should I Know About Content and Tone?

Use PAIBOC analysis: Communicate to meet your audience’s needs and your purposes.

In-Class Exercise: To encourage a lively conversation about the drawbacks of

“instant messaging” and electronic communication in general, ask students to share their
learning experiences about content, tone and netiquette. Start by asking students to
recount their favourite media stories about inappropriate digital behaviour; then ask
students to talk about their own experiences with sending and/or receiving inappropriate
emails, texts and tweets (Exercise 6.5).

What Netiquette Rules Should I Follow?

Follow these guidelines to be a good netizen.

In-Class Exercise: After encouraging students to share their experiences, ask them
to contribute ideas for appropriate electronic messaging behaviour. Challenge students to
create a netiquette policy, with behavioral guidleines for all students to follow in their
personal, professional and academic lives.

Last Word: Technology has blurred the line between private and public space. Many
students use SM and their phones as if they (the students) were protected islands,
somehow insulated from the consequences of their posts, texts tweets and conversations.
Students need to know that electronic privacy does not exist, and that their digital persona
can live forever.

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Part 2: Answers to Textbook Assignments

Questions for Critical Thinking

6.1 What if you do not know the name of the person you are writing a letter to? What can
you do?
Students should be careful not to assume gender with names such as Robin, Chris, Frances,
Sean, or Lee. In cases where names are not specific to gender and the writer does not know
the reader, use the complete name (e.g., Dear Chris Abrahms). When students know
neither, they can use a job title, general group, or replace the salutation with a subject line.

And, unless on a first-name basis with the reader, students should use courtesy titles.
These include Mr., Ms., Mrs., Dr., and Professor.

6.2 Word offers dozens of templates for business documents. How would you decide what
template to use? What are the advantages of using Word templates? What are the
disadvantages?
Have students examine the Word templates available to them, and ask them to describe
specific advantages and disadvantages. Students criteria for advantages and disadvantages
should include references to writers’ purposes and audiences.

6.3 What social media does your university/college use? Where can you locate the official
SM guidelines/best practices?
Some colleges and universities articulate their policy online and in the Student Handbook.
Challenge the students to read and critique the policy (Exercise 15.4). Ask students why
knowing the policy is a good idea.

6.4 What’s the purpose of hashtags? What are the characteristics of good hashtags?

Students’ answers will vary. However, the very best hashtags 1) use words/phrases
to attract readers/followers and 2) are part of the political or social impact of the
tweet, or reflect the cleverness of the tweet.

Exercises and Problems

6.5 Analyzing the Medium and the Message
You can use this exercise as a team builder or ice breaker for your business classes. The exercise
encourages students to
• work together on a topic relevant to their lives and careers
• apply PAIBOC analysis meaningfully
• think both critically and creatively
• use collaborative software

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 • create a summary (Module 14)
• create a bog
• write for real audiences and
• get real feedback
6.6 Telling an Employee That a Workshop Is Full
The information is straightforward. Research suggests that women will be more likely than men
to say “I’m sorry,” not as a way of admitting fault but as a way of showing solidarity. If you see
“sorry” as a negative word and don’t want people to apologize when they aren’t at fault, point
that out to your students.

6.7 Saying No to the Boss

Use class discussion to talk about the general challenge of disagreeing with a boss. Tone is vital
here, as is emphasis on what developing new skills could bring to the organization (What’s in it
for the boss for you to do something new and more challenging?) “Could we discuss some other
upcoming projects in my department?”

Also, discuss the politics of the situation with your class. The boss is asking you to do something
that could put you in a good situation in the long run, despite the short-term difficulties. Does it
make sense to turn down this opportunity?

Finally, discuss the medium. Perhaps an email asking for a brief meeting wherein you can
negotiate face to face for a different assignment is a better choice than an email message.

6.8 Persuading the CEO to Attend Orientation

The email should include

• The request in the subject line and first sentence.

• A reason that the writer wants him/her (not some other high executive if she’s the
CEO; not someone else who teaches business communication if it’s a campus
group).
• What the writer wants him/her to speak about, how much flexibility he/she has to
speak about something else, and some writing samples if he/she’s not already a
member of the organization.
• First and second choices of dates early in the message, and assurances that
the writer will accommodate her/him if she already has commitments then.
• Clear information about whether she/he pays for lunch/breaks/dinner/snacks.
• To know whether equipment to show slides is available.
• A date by which the writer needs a response and why it’s needed then.
• A message that is as short as possible, given this required content.
• A message that is friendly and upbeat.

6.9 Writing a Texting Policy

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You can use this exercise as a team builder while encouraging students to research and reflect
critically on the impact of “socializing” on productivity. The assumption that it’s
counterproductive to text while at work may not be valid.
Encourage students to discuss their texting context: when and where do they text, and how do
they use texting to facilitate their academic/work lives?
In what circumstances and what kinds of employment does texting make sense?
Ask students to reflect on when texting is inappropriate (while driving, interviewing, attending a
movie/concert or the theatre) and where cell phone use and texting is now banned.
Ask students to research the topic of texting and work productivity. Also ask students to research
their university/college and workplace texting and SM policy.
Challenge students to use PAIBOC analysis to decide on the purposes and audiences for the
policy.
The policy could be communicated through an email from the CEO, as part of an orientation
package/video for new employees, and in hard-copy signs in designated areas (if appropriate).
6.10 Asking for More Time or Resources
The difficulty of drafting this message depends on the personality of the boss and the
organizational culture. Many bosses would appreciate being approached about the problem up
front, instead of the employee trying to do work that he or she knows is impossible and then not
doing a good job or not getting anything done. Being viewed as efficient and positive is
important, however. Perhaps the best strategy would be to present a specific plan, or even a
choice of plans, and ask for the supervisor’s approval. Managers value people who are problem-
solvers.

Polishing Your Prose: Making Pronouns Agree with Their Nouns (odd-numbered answers are
in the back of the textbook)

2. When you use the new fax machine, you can process new orders quickly. OR With the new
fax machine, new orders are processed quickly.

4. Teamwork lets us complete projects quickly. OR Working in teams lets us complete

projects quickly.

6. Your résumé shows you have a great deal of experience with computer software. OR Your
résumé shows you gained a great deal of experience with computer software before joining
our company.

8. A simple notebook filled with thoughts and ideas can serve as a journal of your business
experiences.

10. Your supervisor can answer your questions. OR New employees can go to their supervisors
with questions.

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 9
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Another random document with
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“Thy pardon! But it seems to me
That burning Lust doth stream
In this blue odour’s upward curl,
From yon bright marble’s gleam.

“Nay, Theodora, let me go!

And keep thy whim’s reward
For nobles of the Bosphorus!
For slaves——”

“Enough! Ho, Guard!”

FROM H.
 THE LIE’S EXCUSE.

I lie, whene’er as if by chance

I fix on thee my gaze;
I lie, whene’er my saddened glance
Upon another strays.

I lie, whene’er I strive to speak

To thee with unconcern;
For while to laugh and joke I seek,
My heavy heart doth burn.

I lie, whene’er I feign to shun

The meeting I have sought;
While hanging on each word of thine
I strive to seem distraught.

’Tis all a lie! Yet for the lie

I scarce reproached can be,
When I declare, ’fore God I swear,
How great my love for thee.
FROM DERJAVIN.
 THE STREAM OF TIME.

The stream of time, with onward sweep,

Bears off men’s works, all human things,
And plunges o’er Oblivion’s steep
Peoples and kingdoms with their kings.
If for a space amidst the swirl
The lyre or trumpet some sustain,
They’re swept at last in ceaseless whirl,
And none escape Fate’s common main.
NATIONAL SONGS.
 MARRIAGE.

No frost, and the flowers would bloom

Even in wintry weather.
No fret would be mine, if I
And grief did not dwell together;
Ne’er should I sit, as I sit
Here, with a sob in my bosom,
Gazing on open fields—
Fields with never a blossom!
Then to my father said I,
“Marry me, sir, to my equal;
Don’t think of splendours for me:
What meaneth rank in the sequel?
Don’t look for spacious abodes;
I have no wish to be wealthy.
Give me a husband that’s true;
Give me a husband that’s healthy.”
 THE GRAIN.

A grain adown the velvet strolled—glory!

No purer pearl could be—glory!
The pearl against a ruby rolled—glory!
Most beautiful to see—glory!
Big is the pearl by ruby’s side—glory!
Well for the bridegroom with his bride—glory!
 WEDDING GEAR.

The blacksmith from the forge comes he—

Glory!
And carries with him hammers three—
Glory!
Oh, blacksmith, blacksmith, forge for me—
Glory!
A wedding crown of gold, [13] bran-new!—
Glory!
A golden ring, oh, make me, do!—
Glory!
With what is left a gold pin too!—
Glory!
The crown on wedding day I’ll wear—
Glory!
On golden ring my troth I’ll swear—
Glory!
The pin will bind my veil to hair—
Glory!

FOOTNOTES:
[13] During the wedding ceremony in Russia, the bride and
bridegroom wear metal crowns.
FROM DOROSHKEVICH.
 SEBASTOPOL.

What wondrous heroes thou didst rear

Behind thy ramparts roughly-raised!
Europe, the wide world far and near,
Thy glorious gallantry amazed.

Thine annals, to posterity

As bright examples, will recall
Thy long heroic agony;
Nay, more—thy great heroic fall.
FROM POLONSKI.
 ON SKOBELEF.

He stood alone!
Around, from East, from West,
By Russia watched from far,
A giant—nay! a god of war.
Beneath the hostile fire he stood
Unmoved, in reckless hardihood.
His snow-white vest on battle-field
Seemed covered by St. Michael’s shield.
And now his life is reft; that strength
Broken at length....
FROM KRYLOF.
 FABLE.

Whene’er companions don’t agree,

They work without accord;
And naught but trouble doth result,
Although they all work hard.

One day a Swan, a Pike, a Crab,

Resolved a load to haul.
All three were harnessed to the cart,
And pulled together all.
But though they pulled with all their might,
That cart-load on the bank stuck tight.

The Swan pulled upwards to the skies,

The Crab did backwards crawl,
The Pike made for the water straight:
This proved no use at all.

Now, which of them was most to blame

’Tis not for me to say,
But this I know—the load is there
Unto this very day.
CHILD’S SONG.
 LITTLE BIRDIE.

The first in the spring,

From its earliest day,
To God do I sing;
He feeds me alway.
I sow not, nor spin,
I toil not for food;
I love the sweet spring—
Blithe, then, is my mood.
My nest’s in the field;
I live in the sky;
I skim o’er the meads;
Through flower-beds I fly.
At times o’er the streams
Like arrow I sweep;
The swiftest of steeds
Can’t pace with me keep.
And yet I am caught
By one little grain,
And thus, for my life,
A prisoner remain.
For grain, as a snare,
With cunning is set;
One glance—and lo! there,
The bird’s in the net.
FROM LAL.
 ADVICE.

They say a Greek philosopher

Thought long, both night and day,
How for the cure of human woes
To find the surest way.

“The bad,” he found, “without a doubt,

Dwelt but in woman’s ways.”
So he advised, most earnestly,
“Don’t on a woman gaze.”

Now, I before you put the case—

Did he find right or wrong?
If he found right, then his advice
Was hardly worth a song.

To those who wish with certainty

From marriage bonds to fly,
I give this counsel, “Constantly
On women keep an eye.”
 THE TITULYÁRNYI SOVÉTNIK.[14]

He——was a Ninth-class Councillor,

And she——a General’s daughter.
He timidly declared his love;
She spurned him when he sought her.

Then went that Ninth-class Councillor,

And drowned his grief in drinking;
And through the vinous fumes all night
That General’s girl came blinking—blinking.

FOOTNOTES:
[14] Titular councillor = Ninth-class (civil rank) in the Russian
Table of Precedence, corresponding to rank of Captain in the
Army or Lieutenant in the Navy.