John Forde Lack willpower?

No problem
CR#1066: Lack willpower? No problem...
John Forde jforde@copywritersroundtable.com via
gmail.mcsv.net
Tue, Jan 23, 5:54 PM (2 days ago)

Sneak Preview: Let's be honest, sometimes "Just Do It" isn't enough. Here's a
different approach...
COPYWRITER'S ROUNDTABLE #1066
January 23, 2024

When Willpower Fails to Get You Going, Try This Instead

"Efficiency is intelligent laziness."

- David Dunham.

In this time of year when the air still echoes our New Year's resolutions, let's talk
for a second about willpower.

Specifically, the guilt you're supposed to feel for not having any.

Because, Cupcake, I've got news for you: Willpower is a myth.

How so?

Let me backtrack by telling you a little story.

I'm sure you've seen the movie "Rocky."

Even if you haven't, though, you probably know about that famous, pivotal
scene. You know the one I'm talking about. It's early in the morning on a cold
winter day.

And the Italian Stallion, Rocky Balboa, is trying to push himself on a training
run.

At the end of his run, he tries to cap it off by bounding up the steps of the
Philadelphia Art Museum. And the first time we see him make a go at it, he
barely reaches the top.

But then, in a montage of music and willpower, we see his transformation. He

pushes. The trumpets herald his grit. On the gossamer tones of a soul-stirring
crescendo of '70s chorus, he rises up. He's running faster. He's getting stronger.
And this time, when he reaches those same Art Museum steps, he bounds
effortlessly to the top. Victory.

Here's the thing. I know those steps all too well. See, I not only grew up in
Philly, but I went to a high school that sits just 1.3 miles from that spot where
Rocky made his sprint.

How do I know that distance so precisely?

Because I had to run it myself almost every day after school, which we capped
off with the same step-challenge. Day after day. Along with me were about 50
other guys, all running to get in shape for our high school crew team.

Our team was good, too. One of the best in the country. And sure, we worked
hard. For instance, on those runs up the steps, we didn't just run them once. We
ran them up and down over and over again. And not alone, because our coach
made us carry someone on our backs.

We did this in freezing cold, with the snot in our noses freezing into icicles, until
our legs felt like rubber. At which point we would have to run the 1.3 miles back
to the school again. And all of this, before the nearby Schuylkill River was
thawed enough to dip so much as an oar in the icy water.

On our regular runs, there were no trumpets or chorus. Just the coach's whistle,
there to punctuate the sound of your own wheezing. Hard work, right? No pain,
no gain. And all that.

And, it's true, all this work did pay off for many on the team.

hat year and in many other years, our crew team went on to win Nationals. We
were strong, we were tough, we were victorious. That is to say, they were
victorious.

The team. But not me.

Because about halfway into the year, I quit. I just opted out right at the
moment, the river was starting to thaw, and I saw the prospect of 5 am daily
rowing drills approaching on the horizon.

What was the difference between me (the quitter) and those teammates who
stuck it out? Willpower, you might say. Grit. Character and perseverance. Plus,
maybe a higher tolerance for pain. And to that, I'd say you might be at least
partly right.

But you'd also be dead wrong, and here's why...

THE MYTH OF WILLPOWER

In some ways, it's easy to see how the world – and maybe especially, Americans
– have fallen in love with the idea of "just do it" and "if it doesn't taste good, it's
good for you." It feels solid. It feels honorable. It feels like... well... self-
punishment for thinking like a slacker.

The trouble is, willpower... in fact... is not enough. And believing that it should
be could actually help guarantee that you'll fail. Again, how could that possibly
be true?

The answer lies not in some wellspring of willpower itself but in the fuel that
drives most acts of willpower: desire. In other words, it's not just the abstract
virtue of stick-to-it-ive-ness that drives someone to succeed, noble as that idea
might seem.

It's the fact that someone who's doing something has found a way to really want
the end-result they hope to receive.

Maybe that sounds to you like a small distinction.

But think about this...

How many successful people do you see just hating every minute of getting
ahead? How many fit runners grimace every time they strap on their running
shoes? How many 'A' students tear up as they crack open a textbook? How
many successful mom-and-pop shop owners still complain about getting up early
after 50 years in the business?

Sure, there are days when it's a struggle to get up. There are days when the
blankets feel warm. Or the distractions of a full fridge or the ding of an arriving
email just feel too tempting.

But those who we really see accomplishing something with lifelong merit didn't
succeed merely because they're masters at suppressing their displeasure. No,
those smirking "success monkeys" have the nerve to get ahead while wearing a
smile.

They don't hate their lives or choices.

When they grunt their way up the mountain, they love it- every step of the way.
When your willpower runs out, it's because your "desire gap" is just too wide.
You don't love the potential outcome enough to push through the inevitable pain
and challenge.

Sure, you might say, but isn't this just stating the obvious? You're saying to me
the answer to failed willpower and productivity is just that... I don't want it
enough? Sort of.

But that's not everything.

See, while you might agree that just about everything gets easier when you're
enjoying yourself, you might also believe that bridging that "desire gap" is next
to impossible. As in, you can't make yourself want to do what you don't want to
do.

And yet, this doesn't have to be true.

THROWING SPARKS ACROSS THE "DESIRE GAP"

In college, I had a writing teacher who once said to us, "You're not a real writer
until you can't wait to get home to a blank page." I didn't really understand how
right he was until years later.
Maybe you've had this experience where you're out with friends. Or running
errands. Or when you're supposed to be fully fixated on the limpid pools in the
eyes of a significant other.

And yet, you're suddenly struck with an idea that you just have to scribble on a
napkin or email to yourself via your phone because it's not going to let you alone
until you start sketching it out.

You'll think I'm a fruitcake, but I used to get so many ideas like this in the
shower that I got myself some grease pencils so I could write the notes on the
bathroom tiles. And when that didn't work (too many ideas, too few tiles), there
were many times I found myself in a towel and dripping wet, writing it all down
on my laptop.

And even better, after the irresistible idea spark often comes those hours that
seem to slip away like minutes – the state they call "flow" – when you're so
totally absorbed in what you're doing, the whole world seems to disappear.

All this is, by the way, terrible for relationships. I'm downright bug-eyed and
anti-social when I get into one of these manic production moods. But strung
together, they're a lot of what makes the writing life – no matter what kind of
writing you're doing, including copywriting – fun.

And productive.

And yet, in neither of those essential creative stages does it feel like willpower is
the key. They happen not because I force them to happen – or at least, it
doesn't seem that way – but almost in spite of me trying to make them happen.
Like a sneak attack by my neurons.

I see two lessons here.

The first lesson is for everybody.

If you've got a goal, no matter what it is, forget for a second the idea of "no
pain, no gain."
You'll need to work for anything worthwhile, sure.
But that can't be the only juice fueling your engine.
You need something more.
That something could come from tying the outcome more closely to something
you care about.
Maybe it's the reward you'll earn when the project's done.
Or maybe it's something less obvious.
Maybe it's something about the product you're selling or the pitch you're using
to sell it.
Like a detail or a feature or a story that syncs up with the things you're already
passionate about.
The closer you can bind the project to what already interests you,
the more likely you'll get fired up about it.
That's why it's important to try selling things you believe in.
Or at least selling for a client you can believe in.
It's next to impossible to find a passion for something that leaves you cold
or – worse – that you downright despise.

Now here's the second lesson, and it's related.

What's true for us is also true for our customers.
That is, you need to acknowledge upfront that your copy should never aim to
"trick" a customer
into doing something he doesn't want to do
or into buying something he doesn't already want to buy.
Instead, good copywriting is about finding the same kinds of connections
between already existing passions and opinions in your customers
and tying them to whatever features, benefits, and product principles you're in
charge of selling.

It's that simple.

This is almost entirely what good salesmanship is all about –

finding that one spark that leaps the gap between a prospect's most deeply held
desires and what your product can do.
Once you've done that, your customer will consume with the same level of
passion you poured into it.

So, how do we tie all that together?

Also simple.

It's all about the details. Your journey toward bridging that "desire gap" –
both for you as the writer who wants to find "flow"
and for the customer who wants to fly through your message with ease and
delight –
starts when you learn to dig deeper.

It's then and only then that you'll find the trigger that sets you off- the spark –
the dense idea bomb that will be so much more fun to unpack.
Feel stuck? Feel unmotivated? Feel empty inside your noggin?
Just start digging.

Read related books. Talk it out with a friend.

Take a product insider out for drinks.
And then talk it out, before you write a word.
Question everything.
Imagine the picture of your prospect feeling the way he wants to feel.
Now imagine him doing it while using your product.
Don't force a path through the minutia, just let it play out however it lands, at
least at first.

You want to roll around in the muck and see if you don't start feeling like
something has just started brewing in the back of your mind.

To sum up, the best way to get started when you're stuck...
and to bridge that desire gap so you can transform "have to" into "want to"...
is to go in elbows deep and saturate your mind with information.
At the very worst, you'll discover you hate the product and the project.
And you'll do it sooner rather than later, which is worth something.
And at best, you'll discover the one detail that will launch you into a fever of
creativity.
PETITE PRINT

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