DATING
Successful Dating
 The boy usually initiate the dating
 Before making the call, everything should be
noted on paper: where, what time she will be
picked up, when she will be home
 When planning the date, be considerate of the
date’s interest
It’s time to go
 Keep date once it has been agreed upon
 He should honk his horn to announce his arrival
 He should go up the house and greet parents if
they are around.
 When they go out, the boy opens the door of the
car and helps the girl get in, then he goes to his
side
At the restaurant
 The waiter helps the lady to her seat, if not the
escort does this
 Traditionally, if the girl orders from the menu, she
gives the order to her date who gives the order to
the waiter
 If one wants to make a positive impression, better
NOT order:
– Onion soup with cheese
– Barbeque
– Spaghetti
– Spareribs
– Shrimp in shell
Dating tips
 The boy never leaves the girl to go off with other
friends
 Disagreeing with the date on certain topics is all
right provided thoughts and ideas are expressed
pleasantly
 Do not be a faultfinder
 Certain mannerisms are not acceptable
Curfew
 Parents should be consulted for a reasonable
time limit
 As promised, she should be home on time
The “Who Pays?” Dilemma
 For a first date at least, the person who asks
should pay unless both parties agree in advance
to share expenses
 If the person who isn’t paying suggests doing
something in addition to or more costly than the
original plans, then he or she should offer to pay
or split the extra cost
 When a date “just happens” and you aren’t sure
who asked whom, it’s reasonable to suggest
sharing the costs
 If you aren’t sure who’ll pay, be prepared by
taking cash or credit cards. You can offer to
cover your share, but don’t make an issue if the
others person clearly intends to pay
 Paying for a date does not obligate the other
person to do anything in return
ENGAGEMENT
Engagement Ring
- can be new or antique
- the man selects and purchases the ring
Cost. Spend what you can afford without getting into too
much debt
Size. The man could consult the parents or good friend
of his intended bride, as long as they can keep a secret.
Stones and styles. Though the diamond solitaire is
regarded as the traditional engagement ring, the choice
of stones, cuts, metals, and styles is purely individual
Wearing the Ring: Fourth finger of the left hand
WEDDING
Marriage, socially recognized and approved union
between individuals, who commit to one another with the
expectation of a stable and lasting intimate relationship.
It begins with a ceremony known as a wedding, which
formally unites the marriage partners.
Marriage is commonly defined as a partnership between
two members of opposite sex known as husband and
wife.
A marital relationship usually involves some
kind of contract, either written or specified by tradition,
which defines the partners’ rights and obligations to each
other, to any children they may have, and to their
relatives. In most contemporary industrialized societies,
marriage is certified by the government.
Wedding Gift Etiquette
There are some wedding gift etiquette guidelines to
follow:
1) Do not mention gifts or gift registry or gift preferences
on the wedding invitation.
2) If you are having a wedding shower, you can mention
your gift preferences on this invitation.
3) If you prefer cash or gift certificates as a wedding gift,
let your guests know by word-of-mouth
4) Do not use or wear any of the wedding gifts before the
wedding.
5) If you cancel your wedding, all gifts must be returned,
including the wedding shower gifts.
6) For renewal of vows, gifts are not required. But they
would be nice…
Wedding Attire Etiquette
Here are some guidelines to follow:
1) Bridesmaids’ dresses have to be coordinated with
your wedding gown, in elegance and in style.
2) For indoors weddings and evening weddings, the
bridesmaids’ dresses are floor length. If your wedding is
informal and/or outside, the dresses can be knee length.
3) Keep in mind that the color and style of the
bridesmaids’ dresses must be flattering to all or most of
them.
4) For guests, they should wear formal attire: men in
suits and women in cocktail dress, unless the invitation
indicates black tie dress code.
5) It is acceptable to wear a black dress to a wedding,
especially if it has color accessories, like a pin or a scarf.
This way it will look like attending a celebration and not a
funeral.
Church Etiquette
1. Seating arrangements. The bride’s guests sit behind
the bride, in other words, if the bride is at the left, her
guests sit on the left benches. The groom’s guests sit on
the right benches. (Note: Jewish weddings do the
opposite, bride’s on the right side and groom’s on the left
side.)
2. Procession.
a. Groom and his mother (mother on the left, groom on
the right)
b. Groomsmen
c. Bridesmaids
d. Maid of Honor
e. Flower girl and ring bearer
f. Bride with her father, with other escort, or by herself
(bride on the left, father/escort on the right)
3. Veil. The Maid of Honor is in charge of keeping your
veil in place and neat during the ceremony.
4. Engagement ring. There are two ways of dealing
with the engagement ring during the ring exchange:
a. The ring stays on the left hand and the wedding band
goes next to it. This indicates that the engagement came
first and then the wedding. This is a very common
practice in many cultures and countries.
b. The ring goes to the right hand, the wedding band
goes to the left hand and then the engagement ring goes
next to it. This indicates that the wedding band is closer
to your heart.
c. Either way is fine. Do the one you feel more
comfortable with.
5. Bouquet. You give it to the Maid of Honor after she
fixes your veil at the beginning of the ceremony. She will
give it back to you after you sign your Marriage
Certificate.
6. Walking down the isle: father or stepfather. Your
father is the one who should walk you down the isle. If
he passed away or your relationship with him is not
good, your brother can take his place. If neither your
father nor your brother are available for any reason, your
stepfather can walk you down the isle. Bottom line: your
blood family should be considered first.
Reception Etiquette
The reception equals party. It is time to celebrate with
your family and friends your new life. There are some
etiquette rules to follow
Entering the hall. The order to enter the hall is as
follows:
a. Parents of the bride
b. Parents of the groom
c. Bridesmaids and Groomsmen in pairs
d. Maid of Honor and Best Man
e. Flower girl and ring bearer
f. Bride and Groom
Favors. These are gifts the couple give to their guests as
a “thank you” for their attendance. They can be handed
personally when the couple goes from table to table to
greet their guests or they can be left on the tables.
Wedding Symbols
Bouquets: Each type of flower in a bouquet stands for a
particular meaning:
* Roses = Love
* Orchids = Fertility
* Carnations = Fidelity
* Irises = Wisdom
* Acacia = Elegance
* Honeysuckle = Generosity
* Hyacinth = Playfulness
Wedding Rings: The symbol of eternity; a never ending
story. It is placed on the third finger on the left hand
because it is believed that the strongest vein is here and
leads directly to the heart.
The Dove: The dove represents peace and tranquility,
which is the hoped-for blessing between a man and
woman. If the dove holds a ring in its beak, the symbol is
connected with "the marriage made in heaven."
The Heart: Obvious in meaning, the heart represents
love. When used in pairs, two hearts represent the bride
and groom in holy union
Traditions
1. Wedding Day…
Monday for health,
Tuesday for wealth,
Wednesday's the best of all.
Thursday brings crosses,
And Friday losses,
But Saturday - no luck at all.
Tears from the bride or a child during the wedding
service is considered lucky.
2. Wedding dress…
Married in white - You have chosen a right.
Married in blue, Your lover is true.
Married in pink, Your fortunes will sink.
Married in green, You will not long be seen
Married in red, You'll wish you were dead
Married in yellow, Ashamed of the fellow.
Married in brown You'll live out of town.
Married in grey, You'll live far away.
Married in black, You'll wish you were back
It is good luck for the groom not to see the dress before
the wedding day. It will bring more luck if he does not
glance at the dress as the bride walks down the aisle.
3. Something old, something new…
This saying dates back to Victorian time and the full
version is 'something old, something new, something
borrowed, something blue and a silver sixpence in her
shoe.
a) Something Old represents the link with the bride's
family and the past. A common solution many brides
choose is to wear a piece of family jewelry or their
mother's or grandmother's wedding dress.
b) Something New represents good fortune and success
in the bride's new life. The wedding dress is often
chosen as the new item.
c) Something Borrowed is to remind the bride that
friends and family will be there for her when help is
needed. The borrowed object might be something such
as a lace handkerchief or an item of jewelry.
d) Something Blue symbolizes of faithfulness and loyalty
and dates back to biblical times when blue represented
purity. Frequently the brides garter is the blue item.
e) Silver Sixpence in her Shoe is to wish the bride wealth
both financial and happiness.
4. Customary Traditions…
a. The bride stands on the left of the groom during the
marriage ceremony to allow his sword arm to be free
ready to fight off other men who may want her as their
bride.
b. Giving the Bride Away: Today marriage is a state
where man and woman freely choose to live their lives
together. But, at one time, women were regarded as
property. Fathers sold daughters, bartered them off, or
gave them away as gifts. As time passed, marriage
became an arrangements between families, and then
finally, marriage became a free choice. The custom of
the father giving the bride away is a direct descended
tradition from the reality of the father actually giving his
daughter as property. Today, the tradition is connected
with the love between a father and daughter. The father
symbolically passes the responsibility of caring for his
beloved daughter to the man which she has chosen to
marry.
c. Throwing the Bouquet and Garter: In 14th century
France, the garter was valued as a charm which would
bring good fortune. Guests rushed to gain possession of
the garter and in the scuffle, they were getting hurt.
Soon, the bride decided that it would be safer to remove
the garter and throw it to the crowd. The custom of
throwing the bouquet is said to have originated from this
practice. The bouquet is now considered to bring a
marriage proposal to the maiden who catches it.
d. Throwing Rice: Rice, birdseed, or confetti throws are
symbols of wishes for fertility. Throwing rice or birdseed
is a way of wishing the couple healthy and happy
offspring. Today, brides usually choose birdseed
because of the environmental hazards caused by rice.
e. The Honeymoon: Like the tradition of giving the bride
away, the honeymoon is vested in the ancient custom of
kidnapping the bride and carrying her away. For the
couple to relax and spend a few blissful days away from
the reality of the real world.
f. Carrying the Bride Over the Threshold: The ancient
Romans began this tradition based on a mythological
story. It was believed that it was bad luck for the bride to
trip over the threshold. To make sure that this didn't
happen, the groom would lift her up and carry her over.
Carrying the bride over the threshold protects her from
any evil spirits that may be lurking in the new home.
g. June Brides: Maybe you've heard the saying:
"Blessed is the bride on whom the sun doth shine." At
one time it was considered lucky to marry in a sunny
month. The sun was considered a fertilizing power, and
the moon was supposed to be the guardian of lovers.
Since the moon shines brighter in June, the time was
ripe for a productive marriage.
h. Cake Cutting and Sharing the First Toast: Cutting the
cake together is said to have several meanings:
 It is considered to be the married couples first
joint act of hospitality, and in cutting it together,
 the bride and groom are thought to be
announcing equal responsibility to serve one
another's friends and family.
 symbolizes sharing of all life's food to come,
while still others trace the custom to deeper
meanings rooted in the concept of man and
woman providing spiritual sustenance for each
other.
DEATH and FUNERAL
Funeral - is a ceremony marking a person's death.
- often officiated by clergy from the decedent's
or bereaved's church or religion.
A funeral may take place at either a funeral
home or church. A funeral is usually held three to five
days after the death of the deceased. Some people
consider it important to conduct the funeral exactly three
days after the death.
Funerary customs comprise the complex of
beliefs and practices used by a culture to remember the
dead, from the funeral itself, to various monuments,
prayers, and rituals undertaken in their honor. These
customs vary widely between cultures, and between
religious affiliations within cultures.
Funeral services:
 prayers
 readings from the Bible or other sacred texts
 hymns (sung either by the attendees or a hired
vocalist)
 and words of comfort by the clergy.
Frequently, a relative or close friend will be asked to
give a eulogy, which details happy memories and
accomplishments; often commenting on the deceased's
flaws.

During the funeral and at the burial service, the casket
may be covered with a large arrangement of flowers,
called a casket spray. If the decedent served in a branch
of the Armed forces, the casket may be covered with an
American flag. It is considered inappropriate to use both.
Mourning - is in the simplest sense synonymous with
grief over the death of someone.
The word is also used to describe a cultural complex of
behaviors in which the bereaved participate or are
expected to participate.
sandwiches, certain fruits, olives, celery, dry cakes and
cookies.
Which glasses go with what drinks
The glass also needs to taper properly toward the top so
that it captures the bouquet yet allows for sipping. In
general, the stem of a glass should be long enough to
keep hands from touching the bowl, which can affect the
wine's temperature, and therefor its bouquet.

Burial service - conducted at the side of the grave,

tomb, mausoleum or crematorium, at which the body of
the decedent is buried or cremated at the conclusion.

Sometimes, the burial service will immediately follow the

funeral, in which case a funeral procession (the hearse,
followed by the immediate family and then the other
attendees) travels from the site of the memorial service White Pinor Noir Sparkling Red
to the burial site. WaterBrandy
wine Burgundy wine wine

Etiquette
 Distant relatives and acquaintances may be
called upon to attend the visitation.
 The decedent's closer relatives and local friends
attend the funeral or memorial service, and
subsequent burial (if it is held immediately after
the memorial service).
 The bereaved and other attendees at a funeral
wear semi-formal clothing—such as a suit and
tie for men or a dress for women—in a darker
color (usually, gray, dark blue or black). Women
who are grieving the death of their husband or a
close partner sometimes wear a veil to conceal
the face, although the veil is not common now.
 It is a distinct rudeness to leave a mobile
telephone on audible mode at a funeral service,
as its ringing automatically interrupts the service.
a. Water: full body glass with short stem. Hold the glass
by the stem to preserve its chill.
b. Brandy: brandy snifter. Roll the snifter between both
hands and then cup it in one hand - warming the glass
brings out the bouquet in brandy.
c. White wine: slightly smaller glass with wider bowl to
capture the bouquet. Hold the glass by the stem to
preserve its chill.
d. Burgundy Reds and Pinot Noirs: a wide bowl to
bring out their complexity. The glass is slightly taller than
the white wine glass.
e. Champagne: a narrow fluted glass, which reduces
the wine's surface area and keep the bubbles from
dissipating.
f. Red wine: the bigger of the wine glasses. Hold the
glass at the bottom of the bowl where it meets the stem

TABLE MANNERS AND ETIQUETTE

When to start eating:

Despite what mother told you, culinary experts say you
do not always have to wait for everyone to begin - start
eating hot food when it is served. For cold foods or
buffets, wait for the host to announce dinner, and wait
until the head guest starts dishing.

Foods you can get by hand:

1. Bread: break slices of bread, rolls and muffins in half
or into small pieces by hand before buttering.
2. Bacon: if there's fat on it, eat it with a knife and fork. If A – Serviette L – Fish knife
it is crisp, crumble it with a fork and eat with your fingers. B – Service plate M – Soup spoon
3. Finger meals: Follow the cue of your host. If finger C – Soup Bowl N – Dessert spoon and cake fork
meals are offered on a platter, place them on your plate D – Bread and butter plate with butter knife
before putting them into your mouth. E – Water Glass
4. Foods meant to be eaten by hand: corn on the cob, F – White wine
spareribs, lobster, clams and oysters on the half shell, G – Red wine
chicken wings and bones (in informal situations), H – Fish Fork
I – Dinner Fork
J – Salad fork
K – Service knife
HOW TO EAT:
Fresh Fruit
 An apple/pear is quartered with a fruit knife, peeled and
eaten
 Grapes are eaten with fingers
 Avocado, if served in a shell, is eaten with a spoon; if
peeled and cut into bite-size pieces, it is eaten with a fork
 Banana, when informally served, the skin is peeled halfway
and eaten bite by bite. In formal occasions, skin is peeled
all the way, then fruits is placed on plate, cut into bite-size
pieces one at a tine, eaten with a fork
 Mangoes when cut into halves are eaten with a spoon
 Orange is peeled with a knife or fingers and eaten by
sections with the fingers, if served on plate , use a fork.
 Pineapple, if peeled, is cut into thin strips. Use a fruit knife
and fork to cut
Bacon – Crispy bacon may be eaten with the fingers;
otherwise use a fork and knife
Iced Drinks
 Iced tea, coffe, halo-halo, an milk shake are usually
served with a long spoon for stirring. The spoon is placed
in the saucer when not in use. No saucer? Leave the
spoon in the glass and brace it with your forefinger when
drinking
 Once used, the spoon is never laid on the tablecloth
Finger Foods
 Small service plates are provided to hold the finger foods
 Remember to put them first on the plate before eating them
 With fruit or vegetable dips, dip the vegetable or fruit only
once, never a second time especially if it has already been
bitten
 Never eat from the serving plate
Shrimps
 Fried shrimp: use knife and fork
 Oriental style shrimp: use an oyster fork
 Served in shell: Informally, pick up with fingers and shell;
otherwise shrimps are shelled with fork and knife
Crabs
 When steamed, they are never served in formal dinner
 Turn crab on its back and pick out the meat with a nut pick
or oyster fork. The claws are cracked with a nutcracker to
get the meat
Pizza
 Primarily a finger food
 Cut into wedges with a pizza cutter or knife. Get a slice of
pizza with fingers. Some pizza eaters prefers to fold pizza
vertically at the center to keep edges from hanging outward
 Cut into bite-size pieces with knife and fork, and eat with a
fork
Pasta
 Twirl the fork with pasta placing the tines of the fork against
the bowl with the spoon
 Spaghetti, fettuccine or any other pasta may be cut into
sections and eaten with a fork
 When pasta is served with sauce not mixed, it should be
mixed before eating
Sandwiches
 Place on the plate and eaten with the fingers
 Thick club sandwiches should be cut into small portions
 Toothpicks in sandwiches should be removed and placed
at the edge of the plate before eating
Absolutely Do Not:
1) Do not announce your need of the restroom. Nobody
needs to know that while eating. Excuse yourself,
accommodate your chair and discreetly go.
2) Do not complain. Making bad remarks about the food
or the service in front of others will not solve anything
and it will make you look very bad. If you have a
complaint, excuse yourself and talk to the manager or
host: they are the ones in charge of taking care of this
type of problems.
3) Do not touch your head or hair at the table. Do not
scratch your head or fix your hair while at the table.
Excuse yourself and go to the restroom instead.
4) Do not groom at the table. Some women like to comb
their hair or put on makeup at the table. Excuse yourself
and go to the restroom.
5) Do not put your personal belongings on the table.
Briefcases, telephones, pagers, purses, etc. must be
placed away from the food, small items on your lap, big
items near your feet.
6) Do not smoke during meals. Wait until dessert is
finished by everybody. No ashtrays means no smoking.
7) Do not have your plate overloaded. Put on your plate
only the amount of food that makes your plate look
barely full and organized. If after you finish you are still
hungry, you can serve yourself with more food.
8) Do not reach across the table to get something. Ask
the person near the object you need to pass it to you.
9) Do not put crackers in the soup. Eat them separately.
10) Do not put the knife in your mouth. Sometimes it
seems easier for us to just lick a knife or take food from
the knife. Instead, use the right utensil.
11) Do not blow hot food. Wait until it cools enough so
you can eat it. Start with the top layers of food on your
plate.
12) Do not chew with your mouth open. When you do
that people around you can see the food inside your
mouth. Keep your mouth closed until you have
swallowed your food.
13) Do not smack your lips. Making noises while eating
is very unpleasant and it is a lack of consideration
towards the other people at the table.

14) Do not spread your elbows while cutting food. It

gives the impression you have a lot of trouble cutting
your food. Keep your elbows close to your body.

15) Do not saw your food. This also gives the impression
you are having a hard time cutting your food. Just make
one stroke towards you.

16) Do not make gestures with utensils. If you need to

gesture, leave the spoon, fork or knife on the table.

17) Do not push plates away. When you are finished,

leave the plate where it is.

18) Do not use the table water to wipe a stain. If you

stain your clothes, excuse yourself and go to the
restroom.

19) Do not wipe your face with the napkin. Eat carefully
enough to just pad your mouth if anything at all.

20) Do not pick your teeth at the table. Some people

have the habit of picking their teeth at the table, either
with a toothpick, or worse, with their fingers. If something
is between your teeth, excuse yourself and go to the
restroom.

21) Do not make noises under the table. Both of your

feet must be resting on the floor.

22) Do not rock the chair. The four legs of your chair
must be on the floor at all times.