2024_01_becoming-more-collaborative-when-your-impulse-is-to-be-territorial

Digital
Article
Collaboration and Teams
Becoming More
Collaborative When Your
Impulse Is to Be Territorial
Four ways to redefine winning as a shared goal. by Jenny Fernandez,
Kathryn Landis, and Julie Lee
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HBR / Digital Article / Becoming More Collaborative When Your Impulse Is to Be Territorial
…
Becoming More Collaborative

When Your Impulse Is to Be
Territorial
Four ways to redefine winning as a shared goal. by Jenny Fernandez,
Kathryn Landis, and Julie Lee
Published on HBR.org / January 25, 2024 / Reprint H07ZCR
Catherine Falls Commercial/Getty Images
Many leaders prioritize their personal or departmental needs,

especially amid disruption like restructuring, layoffs, and budget cuts.
While it’s natural to advocate for your success or support your people, it
becomes problematic when it comes at the expense of the organization.
A client of ours, “Elena,” came up in a company that had been bought

and sold several times over the past 20 years. With each merger and
Copyright © 2024 Harvard Business School Publishing. All rights reserved. 1
…
acquisition came a change in leadership structure and ownership. This

left Elena feeling vulnerable, as she would often see prior leadership
teams — including her managers, mentors, and supporters — impacted.
Elena felt deeply bruised if she was layered under a new boss or her
team was restructured.
In fact, in times like this, Elena’s territorial instincts would kick in. On
this occasion, after being promoted to EVP-Americas of client success,
she held on to a key client relationship that needed to be transitioned
to one of her new peers. This territorial approach was preventing her
from operating at her full potential in her new role. She was preoccupied
with what she was “losing” to her sales counterpart by transitioning
these client relationships. Consequently, she struggled to capitalize on
the opportunity to make a broader impact on the customer experience
and gain the seat at the executive table she had long desired.
Elena’s experience is not unique. In our work as consultants and

executive coaches, we’ve observed many leaders who become territorial
and overprotective of their teams, client relationships, and resources
to preserve their ability to succeed. It’s not uncommon for talented
leaders to compete internally with their peers for people, investment,
and attention; in fact, it’s often that individual drive that made them
successful in the first place. However, when you’re looking to scale your
leadership and reach the C-suite, this “fend for yourself” mentality will
stop you in your tracks. Here are four strategies to help senior leaders
redefine “winning” as a shared goal.
1. Enhance your self-awareness.
You must start by uncovering your role in the situation. Examine a given
circumstance from all sides to uncover what you may have overlooked
that’s contributing to the problem. This includes increasing your self-
awareness. Research has shown that only 10% to 15% of people fit
…
the criteria of being self-aware, defined as understanding yourself and

your goals and valuing others’ opinions. Conflicts don’t happen in a
vacuum, and it’s never too soon to hold yourself accountable for your
contribution to a given situation.
In Elena’s case, honest reflection prompted her to take a hard look at the
narratives she was telling herself and the biases she had formed about
her coworkers. Marliee Adams explains this concept in her book Change
Your Questions, Change Your Life. It’s easy to mistake being judgmental
(i.e., jumping to conclusions) with exercising judgment (i.e., creating
space to understand someone else’s actions). Adams explains that you
have a choice: to be a “judger” who’s inclined toward fault-finding, or a
“learner” who leads with curiosity to understand someone’s actions.
To increase your self-awareness, reflect on the following questions:
What narrative am I telling myself about the situation? What

assumptions am I making about the circumstances and people
involved?
Exploring the narratives you construct can reveal underlying biases
and preconceptions that may contribute to conflict. It also helps you
connect the dots between your judgments and your decisions and
actions.
Create psychological space and reflect on what you may have inferred
about someone else’s intentions, objectives, or anticipated response.
Often it’s the stories we tell ourselves that lead us to jump to conclusions
that may not be based on reality. For example, if you feel like a victim of
the circumstances, then you may craft a story to support that identity.
What would shift if I slowed down to understand my negative feelings?

It’s natural to pay excess attention to the negatives, which are typically
driven by our emotions. The next time you have a negative reaction,
consider what behavior or event specifically triggered it. This will help
…
you understand the internal or external source of what’s bothering

you, which may not be directly related to the current situation,
as past experiences and challenges can activate negative emotions.
Most importantly, you can delay taking action so that you’re not
disproportionately influenced by your feelings. As Ken Blanchard and
Spencer Johnson shared in The One Minute Manager, “We are not just
our behavior. We are the person managing our behavior.”
What feedback can I solicit to expand my range of inputs?

Ask yourself, “Did I genuinely value others’ opinions, or did I primarily
rely on my own viewpoint?” Embracing diverse perspectives fosters
a more comprehensive understanding of the situation and promotes
collaboration. Consider speaking with a thought partner such as an
executive coach, trusted colleague, or friend who can help you identify
misperceptions and oversights in a non-emotional way. Soliciting
constructive feedback should be treated as information collection, not
gossip or piling on to what you already believe to be true.
2. From win-lose to win-win.
An organization is only as strong as the sum of its parts. Now that you’ve
identified how you contribute to a problem, consider how to move
from a “me to we” mindset. This means that while stakeholders you
depend upon for your success have different or competing priorities,
as members of the same organization, you all share an overarching
mission.
Elena found it incredibly useful to identify the interdependencies

between her team and other departments to fully grasp how hers
and her counterparts’ success were intrinsically linked to achieve a
particular organizational goal.
A powerful exercise to clarify where to focus your energy to align

incentives is a “stakeholder evaluation map.” This will help you identify
…
which stakeholders are critical to your success in the near term. Then
you’ll be able to determine the actions you must take to move the
relationship forward to achieve a mutually beneficial outcome.
To create a stakeholder evaluation map, start with a particular goal or

objective — for example, in Elena’s case, she was focused on increasing
revenue from existing clients year-over-year by 15% and new customer
referrals by 12%. Then ask yourself:
• Who are the key stakeholders I must engage in the coming three to six
months to be successful?
• What specific resources will I need to meet this objective, and by
when?
• Who has the authority to make decisions about this objective?
• What’s the opportunity cost to the customer or organization if I don’t
get the resources I need?
Next, determine the concrete actions that will create mutually

successful outcomes for each stakeholder along with milestones to hold
yourself accountable. Here’s a sample of Elena’s stakeholder evaluation
map:
…
Stakeholder Evaluation Map
Stakeholder Resource Deadline Ultimate Opportunity Key milestones

needed decision- cost to the
maker organization
or customer
SALES Process to 3/1/2024 SVP of Lost revenue • Alignment

seamlessly sales and meeting with
transition suboptimal SVP of sales by
existing customer February 1
customers experience as • Form weekly task
to customer salespeople force
success are spending encompassing
too much time sales- and
supporting customer-
existing success team
customers members to
with identify issues
antiquated and address
processes opportunities by
instead of February 9
engaging with
• Analyze results
potential
and agree on go-
customers
forward steps
with SVP of sales
by March 1From
a few hours to
several days
…
Stakeholder Resource Deadline Ultimate Opportunity Key milestones

needed decision- cost to the
maker organization
or customer
PRODUCT New 4/1/2024 Chief Improve • Engage product

product product customer- marketing
update to officer onboarding agency and
further a experience to product team to
best-in- dramatically determine
class boost net critical moments
customer- promoter in the customer
onboarding scores while journey
experience mitigating lost negatively
revenue from impacting the
clients who customer by
don’t “go live” January 31
on a solution • Develop new
processes/
functionality to
test and learn as
a cross-
functional
product- and
customer-
success team by
February 29
• Optimize based
on feedback and
results to launch
across customer
base on
April 1
Source: Jenny Fernandez, Kathryn Landis, and Julie Lee
For Elena, this exercise illuminated the importance of her cross-

functional partnerships, revealed shared objectives, and enabled her
to focus her energy on advancing her strategy in alignment with her
colleagues.
3. Reestablish trust.
After a long period of uncertainty, like when the organization is

operating in survival mode, it’s important to recognize that a low level
…
of trust has likely developed, and it’s critical to rebuild that trust with
your colleagues. You may observe symptoms such as coworkers lacking
initiative or struggling to make decisions or engage in healthy debates.
As Frances Frei and Anne Morriss, coauthors of Move Fast and Fix
Things and Unleashed propose, there are three pillars of trust. They
write, “People tend to trust you when they believe they are interacting
with the real you (authenticity), when they have faith in your judgment
and competence (logic), and when they feel that you care about them
(empathy). When trust is lost, it can almost always be traced back to a
breakdown in one of these three drivers.”
We asked Elena to reflect on the following coaching questions to

identify the root causes of the trust breakdown and devise strategies
to regain it:
Authenticity:
• What can I do to demonstrate my values and intentions through my

words and behavior?
• In what ways can I build trust by enhancing transparency and
openness in my interactions with others?
Logic:
• What strategies do I enlist to communicate my decisions and actions

clearly and logically to foster understanding and trust?
• What steps can I take to ensure that my decision-making process is
aligned with organizational goals?
…
Empathy:
• How do I ensure that I’m actively listening to others and

demonstrating an understanding of their perspectives and emotions?
• Next time I’m in a meeting with others, what concrete steps can I take
to communicate that I value their success, either during or after the
meeting?
Regaining trust will require both parties to take accountability for

what went wrong as a first step to repairing the relationship. It also
won’t happen overnight. For Elena, this involved speaking to each
stakeholder individually to acknowledge her missteps and share her
desire to improve the working relationship and what that would mean
for her and the organization. She also made a conscious effort to build
rapport and take action to support others’ priorities to demonstrate that
the partnership was not one-sided.
4. Create a shared commitment.
You must forge a collective agreement, including the working norms

and processes you and your colleagues will commit to. Creating a shared
commitment will increase the probability of success, as people naturally
rebel at expectations because they don’t consider the needs of the other
person. This can be established with working agreements that define
objectives and the commitments that must be upheld by all parties to
achieve them.
Here’s some sample language to begin this dialogue:
Given our shared goal of [insert goal], I’d like to achieve [insert milestone]
by [deadline]. This is needed because [explain rationale]. What help do
you need from me to make this happen?
…
Once you know what’s needed from each party and an agreement is
made to achieve a given goal, it’s time to proactively identify progress
milestones along the way, a cadence for communication, and preferred
channels. With a commitment to collaborative problem-solving, you’ll
not only create a more successful outcome but also foster an execution-
as-learning opportunity for continuous improvement.
...
For Elena, transitioning from a “fend for yourself” mentality to a

shared perspective of “winning” enabled her to not only achieve her
goals as a newly promoted executive but also show up as the leader
the organization needed at that moment. While it can be hard to
let go of your default “territorial” response to a situation, adopting a
collaborative approach will ultimately position you for greater success.
As Steve Jobs said, “Great things in business are never done by one
person. They’re done by a team of people.”
This article was originally published online on January 25, 2024.
Jenny Fernandez, MBA, is an executive and team coach, Columbia

and NYU faculty, and future of work and brand strategist. She works
with senior leaders and their teams to become more collaborative,
innovative, and resilient. Her work spans Fortune 500 companies,
startups, and higher education. Jenny has been recognized by
LinkedIn as a “Top Voice in Executive Coaching, Leadership
Development, and Personal Branding” and was invited to join the
prestigious Marshall Goldsmith’s 100 Coaches community. She is a
Gen Z advocate. Connect with her on LinkedIn.
…
Kathryn Landis, MBA, is the founder and CEO of the global coaching
and advisory firm Kathryn Landis Consulting, which helps senior
leaders empower and inspire their teams, create a lasting positive
impact, and become the best versions of themselves in work and
life. She is an adjunct professor at New York University and a former
leader at American Express and Automatic Data Processing. Connect
with her on LinkedIn.
Julie Lee, PhD, is a clinical psychologist, NYU faculty, and a leading

Gen Z employment and mental health strategist. Dr. Lee’s work spans
Fortune 500 companies, startups, and higher education institutions,
including Harvard and Brown University. In her consulting work, Dr.
Lee helps organizations to motivate and retain Gen Z professionals
and coaches executives to lead with purpose and empathy. Connect
with her on LinkedIn.

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Digital

Collaboration and Teams

Becoming More Collaborative

Catherine Falls Commercial/Getty Images

Many leaders prioritize their personal or departmental needs,

A client of ours, “Elena,” came up in a company that had been bought

Copyright © 2024 Harvard Business School Publishing. All rights reserved. 1

acquisition came a change in leadership structure and ownership. This

Elena’s experience is not unique. In our work as consultants and

1. Enhance your self-awareness.

Copyright © 2024 Harvard Business School Publishing. All rights reserved. 2

the criteria of being self-aware, defined as understanding yourself and

To increase your self-awareness, reflect on the following questions:

What narrative am I telling myself about the situation? What

What would shift if I slowed down to understand my negative feelings?

Copyright © 2024 Harvard Business School Publishing. All rights reserved. 3

you understand the internal or external source of what’s bothering

What feedback can I solicit to expand my range of inputs?

2. From win-lose to win-win.

Elena found it incredibly useful to identify the interdependencies

A powerful exercise to clarify where to focus your energy to align

Copyright © 2024 Harvard Business School Publishing. All rights reserved. 4

To create a stakeholder evaluation map, start with a particular goal or

Next, determine the concrete actions that will create mutually

Copyright © 2024 Harvard Business School Publishing. All rights reserved. 5

Stakeholder Evaluation Map

Stakeholder Resource Deadline Ultimate Opportunity Key milestones

SALES Process to 3/1/2024 SVP of Lost revenue • Alignment

Copyright © 2024 Harvard Business School Publishing. All rights reserved. 6

Stakeholder Resource Deadline Ultimate Opportunity Key milestones

PRODUCT New 4/1/2024 Chief Improve • Engage product

Source: Jenny Fernandez, Kathryn Landis, and Julie Lee

For Elena, this exercise illuminated the importance of her cross-

After a long period of uncertainty, like when the organization is

Copyright © 2024 Harvard Business School Publishing. All rights reserved. 7

We asked Elena to reflect on the following coaching questions to

• What can I do to demonstrate my values and intentions through my

• What strategies do I enlist to communicate my decisions and actions

Copyright © 2024 Harvard Business School Publishing. All rights reserved. 8

• How do I ensure that I’m actively listening to others and

Regaining trust will require both parties to take accountability for

4. Create a shared commitment.

You must forge a collective agreement, including the working norms

Here’s some sample language to begin this dialogue:

Copyright © 2024 Harvard Business School Publishing. All rights reserved. 9

For Elena, transitioning from a “fend for yourself” mentality to a

This article was originally published online on January 25, 2024.

Jenny Fernandez, MBA, is an executive and team coach, Columbia

Copyright © 2024 Harvard Business School Publishing. All rights reserved. 10

Julie Lee, PhD, is a clinical psychologist, NYU faculty, and a leading

Copyright © 2024 Harvard Business School Publishing. All rights reserved. 11

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