Introduction to Particle Cosmology The

Standard Model of Cosmology and its

Open Problems 1st Edition Cosimo
Bambi Alexandre D Dolgov
Visit to download the full and correct content document:
https://ebookmeta.com/product/introduction-to-particle-cosmology-the-standard-mode
l-of-cosmology-and-its-open-problems-1st-edition-cosimo-bambi-alexandre-d-dolgov/
More products digital (pdf, epub, mobi) instant
download maybe you interests ...

Particles in the Dark Universe A Student s Guide to

Particle Physics and Cosmology 1st Edition Yann
Mambrini

https://ebookmeta.com/product/particles-in-the-dark-universe-a-
student-s-guide-to-particle-physics-and-cosmology-1st-edition-
yann-mambrini/

Handbook of Gravitational Wave Astronomy 1st Edition

Cosimo Bambi Stavros Katsanevas Konstantinos D Kokkotas

https://ebookmeta.com/product/handbook-of-gravitational-wave-
astronomy-1st-edition-cosimo-bambi-stavros-katsanevas-
konstantinos-d-kokkotas/

Introduction to the Standard Model solutions only 1st

Edition Stuart Raby

https://ebookmeta.com/product/introduction-to-the-standard-model-
solutions-only-1st-edition-stuart-raby/

Gravitational Waves: Vol 2: Astrophysics and Cosmology

Michele Maggiore

https://ebookmeta.com/product/gravitational-waves-
vol-2-astrophysics-and-cosmology-michele-maggiore/
Advances in Cosmology Science Art Philosophy Marilena
Streit-Bianchi

https://ebookmeta.com/product/advances-in-cosmology-science-art-
philosophy-marilena-streit-bianchi/

Black Holes Cosmology and Extra Dimensions Second

Edition Kirill A. Bronnikov

https://ebookmeta.com/product/black-holes-cosmology-and-extra-
dimensions-second-edition-kirill-a-bronnikov/

Modern General Relativity Black Holes Gravitational

Waves and Cosmology 1st Edition Mike Guidry

https://ebookmeta.com/product/modern-general-relativity-black-
holes-gravitational-waves-and-cosmology-1st-edition-mike-guidry/

Understanding Scientific Theories of Origins Cosmology

Geology and Biology in Christian Perspective Robert C.
Bishop

https://ebookmeta.com/product/understanding-scientific-theories-
of-origins-cosmology-geology-and-biology-in-christian-
perspective-robert-c-bishop/

When the Earth Was Flat Studies in Ancient Greek and

Chinese Cosmology Springerlink (Online Service)

https://ebookmeta.com/product/when-the-earth-was-flat-studies-in-
ancient-greek-and-chinese-cosmology-springerlink-online-service/
Another random document with
no related content on Scribd:
house-steward to Mr. Sumner, a member of parliament, whose
estate was situated near Guildford, in Surrey; where my mother, it
appears, went to reside after her union, of which I was the first fruits,
being born at the village of East Clandon, on the 20th of May, 1782.
My father shortly afterwards quitted the family of Mr. Sumner, and
obtained a similar post in the service of Sir Richard Hill, Bart., with
whom he continued several years.
In the year 1785, my grandfather, being advanced in life and
naturally fond of domestic retirement, quitted the profession to which,
by his integrity and honour, he had long been an ornament; and
prevailing on my parents to commit me to his care, removed with my
grandmother to S⸺ in S⸺shire, I being then about three years of
age. In this neat little town, surrounded by the relatives of my
grandmother, and many friends of his own, my grandfather having
served his clerkship in the county, this worthy and truly virtuous
couple enjoyed, for several years, uninterrupted happiness, their
only care being centred in the education and indulgence of their
grandson, of whom they every day became more extravagantly fond.
As my years increased, I was transferred from the preparatory
school, at which I had been first placed, to a respectable seminary in
the town, one of the best the county afforded, where I received the
rudiments of a general education, and my capacity for learning
endeared me still more to my indulgent friends. The imprudence of
my mother’s conduct had much lessened her in the affectionate
esteem of her parents; nor did her subsequent behaviour, I believe,
tend to restore her or recommend my father to their good opinion; so
that their correspondence grew every year less frequent, and at
length settled in a formal coldness on both sides. What may appear
more unnatural, though not uncommon, is, that in proportion as the
kindness and liberality of my grandparents towards me increased,
the affection of my father and mother diminished; and, as they had
several children afterwards, I soon became an object, if not of
aversion, at least of indifference. Of these children, two brothers and
a sister died in their infancy, and two sisters younger than myself are
still living.
 Nothing worth record occurred during my continuance in S⸺
shire. I passed my hours of relaxation, like other children, in
harmless sports, but attended with avidity to my lessons when at
school; and indeed as soon as I was capable of understanding, my
chief delight was in reading books of an entertaining nature, from all
of which I derived more or less instruction. I even preferred this
rational amusement to the childish games of my young companions,
from which my good friends prognosticated that I should become a
great man. I must confess that I was already a spoiled child; but I did
not abuse the indulgence I met with, by any irregular or vicious
conduct, nor did I betray any symptoms of latent depravity, or
indicate any wicked propensities. I hope my readers will believe this
assertion when I relate by what gradations I fell from the path of
rectitude, and when I account for the causes which actuated me to
pursue a course of dishonesty. My principal delight, when very
young, was to frequent the only bookseller’s shop our little town
afforded, where I would stand for hours reading, or rather devouring,
whatever books, or, as my dear grandfather termed it, mental food, I
could lay hold of. There was also an old woman who had a
circulating library, consisting of about a hundred volumes, chiefly
novels, to whom I disbursed every sixpence and shilling I received
for pocket money. My parents, indeed (for by this term I shall in
future, for brevity’s sake, call my grandfather and grandmother, as it
is from them only I ever experienced parental affection; they, I say)
did not wholly approve of this indiscriminate passion for reading;
fearing, and indeed with reason, as I am now convinced, that I
should meet with matter tending to vitiate a young mind (which has
been justly compared to a sheet of white paper, open to receive and
retain the first impressions), and to inculcate romantic notions of men
and manners. Though I subscribe to the justice of this idea in
general, yet I firmly believe it was owing to this course of reading that
I very early acquired a knowledge of the world, surprising in one so
young; and that when I soon after launched into the ocean of life, I
was on my guard against many of the deceptions of the designing
part of mankind and enabled to avoid or defeat them. My beloved
parents, indeed, suspected not the errors to which I was becoming
daily a stronger proselyte. My grandfather, whom I believe to have
been as perfect a character and as good a Christian as nature ever
formed, inculcated both by precept and example, the love and
practice of piety and virtue; and, above all, an inflexible adherence to
honesty. He possessed many peculiarities of habit as well as
principle, several of which I inherit from him;—would to Heaven I
inherited his virtues!
My volatile disposition was early manifested by my want of stability
or steady application to any particular employment or pursuit. Like
Robinson Crusoe, I felt a strong predilection for rambling into foreign
countries, and had a longing desire to go to sea. This arose from
perusing the Voyages of Cooke, Anson, and other circumnavigators;
so enraptured was I with their profession, that before I was twelve
years old I had a pretty just notion of nautical manœuvres, without
having ever seen a ship, and had most sea-terms at my tongue’s
end. This rising inclination was, however, checked for a time by the
dissuasions of my friends, who were alarmed at the bare thought of
it, and by the inland situation of the county we resided in. Among my
domestic amusements I practised drawing, for which I had a good
natural genius; but happening to be furnished with some prints of
running horses for imitation, and being a great admirer of that noble
animal, I suddenly turned my whole attention to this subject, in which
I soon became a pretty good proficient, considering my youth and
that I never had any master, and it appears to have been my forte.
These prints having always the pedigree and performances of the
animal subjoined, insensibly gave me a passion for racing, which
became my next hobby-horse. I now eagerly perused the Racing
Calendar, took in the Sporting Magazine, purchased a Stud-Book[2];
and was so indefatigable in my researches, that, before I was
fourteen, I could repeat the pedigree of any celebrated horse, and
could discourse of handicaps, and give-and-take plates, of the
Beacon Course, and the Devil’s Ditch[3], with the fluency of a veteran
jockey—and I actually stole a march from London to Newmarket in
hopes of obtaining a situation in the racing stables; flattering myself
that I might, like the great Dennis O’Kelly[4], whose life I had read,
become in time a shining character on the turf; but I failed in this
attempt to disgrace my friends, and degrade myself, as my youth
and genteel appearance deterred the persons to whom I applied
from listening to my request.
I shall now resume the thread of my narrative. After six years’
residence at S⸺, my grandfather was prevailed on, by the
solicitations of my father and mother, to return to London, and reside
with them. My father, from whom I probably derived my disposition to
instability, had by this time quitted the service of Sir Richard Hill, and
established himself in the hat and hosiery business in Great
Turnstile, Holborn. How this chimerical project occurred to him, I
know not, as he certainly had been bred to no trade; however, he
was sanguine in his hopes of success. He had taken a good house
and shop, and on our arrival in town, we found the family very
comfortably established. I was introduced to my two surviving
sisters, who were pretty, lively girls, and my father and mother
received me with a shew of great affection.
I was now turned of nine years old, and shortly after our arrival,
was placed by my grandfather at a respectable boarding-school at
Stockwell, in Surrey, and my sisters were soon afterwards settled by
their father at one equally genteel at Oakingham, in Berkshire. As I
shall not have occasion to say much more of these girls, I shall now
briefly observe that they received a good female education, learning
French and the other fashionable accomplishments of the age. Their
capacities were good; they were both more than agreeable in their
persons, and their dispositions uncommonly sweet.
 CHAPTER II.
I am taken from School and return to my Grandparents.—Remove to
Cambridgeshire.—From thence again to London.—And a second time to S
⸺shire.—Different Plans proposed for my settlement in life.—Friendship of
the Moultrie Family.—Am sent to Liverpool on liking.

I continued at Stockwell nearly three years, during which time I

acquired a tolerable knowledge of the classics, and became as
perfect in the French language as I could do without residing in
France. It was a custom at this school to allow of no English being
spoken, except in the hours devoted to instruction, by which means
our progress in French was much facilitated. The scholars had free
access to a well-selected library, by which means I gratified my
passion for reading, which increased with my years. I was
particularly fond of plays, and fancying I possessed some talents for
the stage, I actually formed the design, in conjunction with a youth of
good family, to elope from the school and join a company of strollers,
with the manager of whom he had formed an acquaintance in
London; but this hopeful scheme was frustrated by the young
gentleman’s sudden removal to the University. I was now taken from
school, the excessive fondness of my dear parents not being able to
brook a longer separation from me. I found these kind benefactors in
private lodgings, they having quitted my father’s house on account of
family disagreements. The latter had relinquished the hat business,
by which he was minus some hundreds of pounds; and after a short
lapse of time, he embarked in a very different trade, that of a tallow-
chandler, of which he had conceived favourable ideas: in this too, he
failed of success, and was equally unfortunate in several subsequent
speculations, by which means he considerably impoverished himself;
however he continued to maintain appearances with tolerable credit
until his decease. I shall now take leave of my father, mother, and
sisters, for the present, their history having no further connexion with
my own life, as I never again became an inmate of their family.
 After a short residence in ⸺ square, my grandfather, on account
of his wife’s declining health, and with a view to economy in house-
keeping, that he might be more liberal in his bounty to myself,
thought fit to remove to Wisbeach in Cambridgeshire, where an old
schoolfellow of his resided, who had strongly pressed this measure.
Here he took a neat little house ready furnished, and placed me
under the tuition of a clergyman in the town, whose school I attended
daily.
At the end of twelve months, we again returned to London, and
soon afterwards removed once more to S⸺shire, in the 14th year
of my age.
I was most affectionately received by all my relations, and it was
now considered time to consult upon my future disposal. My kind
grandfather, who had been at so much care and expense in my
education, had always intended me for one of the liberal professions,
and, as was most natural, he would have preferred his own. I had a
great uncle who had been a very eminent surgeon and apothecary,
in which business he was succeeded by his son, who is still living in
credit at S⸺. It was in contemplation to have me articled to this
gentleman, but I wished for a more active employment, and should
have preferred the army or navy. The dangers attending these
honourable professions, were however insuperable bars to the
consent of my fond parents.
At this juncture a most advantageous and unexpected offer of
patronage was extended in my behalf, which but for my
unaccountable obstinacy, would have been thankfully embraced; but
my evil genius rendered abortive a design, which bade fair to
procure me an honourable rank in society. The case was as follows:
Within a mile of our little town resided John Moultrie, Esq., whose
father was governor of a British Settlement in North America, and of
whose name frequent mention is made in the history of the ill-fated
war with that country. By his attachment to the cause of loyalty, this
gentleman, as well as his son, suffered considerable losses in their
private property, for which in common with many others, Governor
Moultrie, on his return to England, received a liberal pecuniary
compensation from ministers. The old gentleman was at this period
lately deceased, and his son John succeeded to a large fortune, and
a fine estate and mansion-house called Aston, which his father had
purchased in the situation above described. He had married a very
beautiful and accomplished woman, born in America, by whom he
had an only son about my own age, who was like myself the darling
of his parents. This youth (named Austin) had been my early
schoolfellow and playmate; and the Moultrie family being in the habit
of exchanging visits with most of the respectable inhabitants of S
⸺, among which class my relations were numbered, I became
known to them. As they perceived a growing attachment between
myself and the young Austin, and my manners pleased them, my
visits were encouraged, and I was almost a constant guest at Aston
Hall. By the circle of genteel persons of both sexes with whom I
there associated, my address was improved as well as my
understanding. Young Moultrie and myself became inseparable; we
were constant companions in the chase and other rural sports; and
when the weather was unfavourable, Mrs. Moultrie took delight in
hearing me read her favourite authors, to which she obliged her son
to attend; and as I had rather the advantage in mental acquirements,
she was pleased to say that I contributed to his improvement. In a
word, I may truly assert that the happiest moments of my life were
spent in this amiable family.
At the period of which I am now writing, the parents of my young
friend had determined on settling him at the University of Oxford, in
order to complete his education: and the regret they felt at parting
with their beloved child, was scarcely more poignant than that of the
latter, at his approaching separation from me, so ardent was our
juvenile friendship. In this state of affairs, his father knowing my
situation, and the circumstances of my grandfather, who by his
liberality towards me, had much impaired his private fortune, which
consisted at his retirement, of but a few thousand pounds stock in
the 3 per cent consols, a considerable part of which he had sold out
at a very disadvantageous rate, by reason of the great depression in
stocks at the commencement of the French war: knowing all this,
and that my settlement in life was at this moment the subject of
much perplexity, Mr. Moultrie, with a most unparalleled generosity,
offered to place me at college on the same terms with his son, and at
the end of three years, if he then withdrew the latter, to take upon
himself the charge of my future fortune. Here was an offer from a
gentleman of 2,000l. a year! I have always been of Shakspeare’s
opinion, that “There is a tide in the affairs of men,” &c., and that most
men have not only one, but several opportunities of attaining honour
and prosperity. I know this has been my own case, but my ill destiny
has hitherto rendered such chances unavailing. I have unhappily
neglected to “take the current while it served.” So, in the present
instance, having foolishly conceived, that to be immured within the
walls of a college for several years, would deprive me for so long a
time of the gratifications I expected, both of mind and body, on
making my débût on the stage of life, when I should be released
from the constraint of parental authority; the idea of losing so much
valuable time, which I fancied I could employ to much more
advantage, induced me to protest in strong terms against the
measure proposed; and my too indulgent parents at last gave way to
my puerile remonstrances, and declined with the best grace they
could the kindness intended me. This impolitic step was much
censured by my other relations, particularly two maiden aunts, from
whom I had great pecuniary expectations; however it was soon after,
consented to by all parties, that I should be sent on trial, or as it is
called, on liking, to a respectable mercantile concern at Liverpool.
The parties were Messrs. Swan and Parker, very eminent linen-
drapers, who besides an extensive retail trade, exported very largely
to the East and West Indies, &c. A cousin of mine had been placed
with these gentlemen a few years before, but from ill health was
obliged to return to his friends at S⸺. His father, the junior Mr.
Yonge I have before mentioned, had paid one hundred guineas with
him as a premium; and as the young man’s indisposition prevented
him from reaping the benefit of his engagement, Messrs. Swan and
Parker very handsomely consented to take me as an apprentice
without any fee, by way of remuneration to the family. My
grandfather indeed did not much relish the idea of a yard and a pair
of scissors; he had fondly hoped to see me profit by the education I
had received, in a very different line of life; but as I seconded the
general wish of my friends on this occasion, and much time had
been already lost in deliberation, all opposition ceased; and I
accordingly set out well equipped with all necessaries, by the stage
coach for Liverpool, where, on my arrival, I was kindly received by
my new masters: and the next day instructed in the nature of my
duty, and the economy and rules of the house. Having now brought
the reader to an epoch in my life, which promised considerable
advantage to my future prospects, I shall put an end to the second
Chapter.
 CHAPTER III.
My Employment in my new Situation.—Seduced by an Apprentice in the House to
neglect my Business, and keep irregular Hours.—Become a Frequenter of the
Cockpit.—Repeated Losses at this Place induce me to recruit my Finances by
embezzling my Employers’ Money.—Remonstrances on my Misconduct
producing no effect, am seriously admonished, and sent back to my Friends.

I was, now turned of fourteen; my health and constitution good, my

spirits elevated, and I felt all those pleasing sensations, which
naturally arise in a youthful mind, happy in conscious innocence, and
flattered by the prospect of rising to honourable independence. The
gaiety and bustle of this beautiful and improving borough at once
charmed and amused me; I spent a week in viewing the public
buildings, the environs, &c.; but above all, my admiration was excited
by the numerous and capacious docks, by which ships of large
burden are admitted, as it were, into the heart of the town, and
discharge their rich and varied cargoes with surprising facility, which
are deposited in spacious warehouses, of amazing extent, and from
twelve to fourteen stories high, with which these noble docks are
nearly surrounded.
The opportunities I had, during my residence in Liverpool, of
viewing the daily arrivals and sailings of merchant-ships to and from
all parts of the world, particularly the Guineamen, which formed a
remarkably fine class of vessels[5], revived the latent desire I had for
a sea-faring life; and I wanted but little incitement, had the smallest
opportunity offered, to take French leave of my masters, and gratify
my rambling propensity. However, the bustle in which I was
continually involved, and the new scenes of amusement which every
succeeding day presented, suppressed the inclination for a time; but
that it was not totally subdued, will be seen hereafter.
The establishment and economy of our house were upon the most
regular plan; the former consisted of six apprentices, (including
myself,) and four assistants at very liberal stipends, besides a
nephew of the elder partner, who superintended the whole, and
officiated in the compting-house: there were also several porters,
and other subordinates, for all of whom full employment was found.
Being the junior apprentice, it was my province to polish the
counters, trim the lamps, carry out small parcels, and to perform
other inferior duties; when disengaged from which, I assisted in
waiting on the retail customers, and making myself otherwise useful
behind the counter. We had a plentiful table appropriated for us, to
which we retired in turn during the hours of business; commodious
and airy chambers; and, in short, enjoyed every comfort we could
desire.
For the first month of my probation, I behaved extremely well, and
by my quickness and assiduity, gained the good opinion of my
employers, who wrote of me in the most favourable terms to my
friends in S⸺shire; nor did my expenses exceed my allowance for
pocket-money, which was fully adequate to every rational enjoyment.
Among my fellow apprentices, was a young man named King,
some years older than myself, with whom, from a similarity of
sentiments, I formed a close intimacy. He was of an excellent
disposition, but a great lover of pleasure; and as his servitude was
far advanced, and his prospects peculiarly flattering, he was under
very little restraint, but gave the rein to his passion for dissipation.
His expenses were profuse, but whether he indulged in them at the
expense of his probity, I could never ascertain. He soon introduced
me to several young men of his own stamp, and I became in a short
time as great a rake as the best of them: nor was our conversation
confined to our own sex; scarcely a night passing without our visiting
one or other of those houses consecrated to the Cyprian goddess,
with which the town of Liverpool abounds. In such a course of life, it
is not likely that I could submit to limited hours; my companion and I
seldom returned home before midnight, and sometimes not till the
ensuing morning. Though we took measures to keep this from the
ears of our employers, it could not fail to be known in time; and the
consequence was, a strong but tender remonstrance on my
imprudence, which much affected me at the moment; but the
impression was transitory, and soon effaced. I plunged deeper and
deeper in the vortex of folly and dissipation, until I was obliged to
have recourse for advice to the Æsculapius of Gilead-house.
This irregular mode of life had borne hard on my finances, but I
had not, as yet, had recourse to fraud or peculation. I was liberally
supplied by my relations, on leaving S⸺, and had received my first
quarterly allowance; but an event, which soon followed, tempted me
to the first breach of confidence and integrity.
I had in my youth been passionately fond of Cocking, a sport for
which the county of S⸺ has been always famed; and though so
young, I had constantly kept several cocks at walk, unknown to my
parents; so that I had acquired a considerable share of experience
and knowledge on the subject. One day, when I was sent with some
muslins to wait on a lady in the environs of Liverpool, near the Canal,
I accidentally passed a cockpit, where a great crowd was
assembled; and I understood that a grand Main was about to
commence. Elated at this pleasing intelligence, I hastened to
execute my commission; and returning to the house, entered it, and
leaving my wrapper of goods in care of the landlady, I ascended to
the pit, and took my seat. The company was, as usual, of a motley
description, but there were many genteel persons. I ventured a few
trifling bets at first with various success; but at length an opportunity
offering, which I considered as next to a certainty, I laid the odds to a
large amount, flattering myself that by this stroke of judgment, I
should be enabled to figure away with increased eclat among my
gay companions. After I had so done, greater odds were still
vociferated, but in a moment the scene was changed! the fallen
cock, in the agonies of death, made a desperate effort, and rising for
a moment, cut the throat of his antagonist, who was standing over
him, in the act of crowing with exultation on his victory! The latter
immediately fell, choked with the effusion of blood, nor did the victor
survive him many moments. The whole pit resounded with
acclamations, and the discord which ensued beggars description. I
was not the only sufferer by this revolution of fortune; many others
had laid higher odds than myself, and to a much greater amount. I
was soon surrounded by my creditors, to whom I disbursed every
shilling I had about me, among which were some pounds I had just
received from the lady for goods, and for which I had given her a
receipt. I was still something deficient, for which I pledged my honour
to one of the parties, giving my address, and promising payment on
an early day. I now returned home, filled with remorse and shame;
but as the first false step of a young person insensibly leads to
another, I added to my guilt by concealing the affair from my
employers, and directed them to book the articles the lady had
selected. I had a degree of false shame about me, which rendered
me incapable of confessing the truth and promising amendment, or
all might still have been well. In the evening I had recourse to the
bottle to drown my chagrin; and I determined to purloin a certain sum
every day, in the course of my attendance on retail customers until I
had liquidated my debt of honour! Then, I vowed to stop and reform.
Delusive idea! how little did I then know my own weakness, or the
futility of such resolutions in a young mind! And who, that once
begins a career of vice, can say to himself, “Thus far will I go, and no
farther?” After I had discharged my engagement, I found a small sum
must be raised for pocket-money, and other exigencies, as it would
be above two months before I could expect a remittance.
I therefore continued my peculation, and at length my evil genius
suggested to me, that I might, by venturing a small sum, become
more fortunate at the cockpit, and repair the loss I had sustained; as
miracles don’t happen every day, and the odds must win in the long
run. Thus I argued with myself; and, fatally for me, I tried the
experiment.
From this moment I never missed a day’s fighting at the cockpit;
and when sent on business which required my speedy return, I could
not tear myself from the spot, but frequently staid out several hours,
and afterwards forged a lie to account for my delay. I sometimes
came off a winner, but as I was not then acquainted with the art of
hedging, by which the knowing ones commonly save themselves, I
was sure to be a loser at every week’s end.
I managed matters so well, indeed, that my frequent secretions
from the till, were not discovered, however they might be suspected.
The extensive trade of the shop rendered it next to impossible; and
what I abstracted, was a trifle compared to the gross receipts of the
day.
My continued misconduct became now the subject of frequent
remonstrances on the part of Mr. Parker the resident partner; which
not having the desired effect, that gentleman wrote to my friends,
informing them in general terms, that I had unhappily formed
improper connexions, and that my late levity of conduct rendered me
unfit to be received into their house; therefore, desiring I might be
recalled without delay. Mr. Parker concluded with a remark, which I
shall never forget, and which was peculiarly gratifying to my
grandfather’s (perhaps too partial) feelings: after expatiating on my
general capacity for business, he added “his smartness and activity
are really wonderful.” This letter produced a speedy answer, in
consequence of which, I was directed to hasten my departure, which
took place in a few days, Mr. Parker giving me a great deal of
wholesome advice at parting; observing that although it was not in
his power to charge me with any direct criminality, my inconsiderate
behaviour, and the continued excesses of my conduct, left but too
much room for unfavourable conjectures.
Behold me now returned to my grandfather, after an absence of
nearly five months; and this excursion may be called my first
entrance into life. I could not help blushing at the consciousness of
my own unworthiness; but the blind partiality of my dear parents,
induced them to believe me less culpable than I really was; and to
listen readily to any thing I had to offer in palliation of my errors.
 CHAPTER IV.
I prevail on my Grandfather to let me visit London.—Am provided with Letters of
Recommendation.—Received into the Office of a respectable Attorney, my
Kinsman.—Quit that Employment, and engage with a wholesale Stationer.—
Obtain Clothes, &c., on credit, without any intention of paying for them.—Bilk
my Lodgings repeatedly.—Return to the Law.—Obliged to live by my Wits.—
Become a Hackney Writer.—Resort nightly to the Blue Lion.

Shortly after my return from Liverpool, finding the narrow limits of a

small market-town too circumscribed for my active disposition; and
nothing having been determined on, as to my future disposal, I
entreated my parents to let me go to London, which I had always
considered as the grand field for talents of every description; and
where I doubted not of forwarding myself, by the exercise of those I
possessed. They at length consented, and after the necessary
preparations, I set out, receiving the blessings and prayers of these
indulgent benefactors, and moderately supplied with money for my
reasonable necessities.
My grandfather had of course many acquaintances in London, of
his own profession, to several of whom he furnished me with letters
of recommendation; it being his wish, that I should by a few months’
practice in a law office, ascertain how far I was disposed to be
articled for the usual period, necessary to procure my admission. I
had always been prepossessed in favour of this profession, which I
knew from my reading and experience, to abound in variety, and, if I
may be allowed the phrase, in pleasing perplexity.
On my arrival in town, I waited first on a relation of our family, Mr.
P⸺, a young man lately established in the profession, and
received as a partner by Mr. M⸺, a gentleman of large fortune,
and extensive practice, who would, it was probable, in a few years’
time, retire from business in favour of my cousin.
 The latter received me very kindly, and without hesitation, offered
to employ me (with his partner’s concurrence) as copying clerk, at a
weekly salary, which to a youth like me, was of course but small.
As I conceived this offer too advantageous to be rejected, I
thankfully embraced it, and immediately entered on my function in
Lincoln’s-Inn New Square.
As I had no motives of affection to attract me to my father’s house,
I determined on becoming master of my own conduct; and
accordingly took a neat private lodging, and regulated my mode of
life conformably to the state of my finances. I breakfasted at home,
dined at a tavern or genteel eating-house, and in the evening took
my tea and read the papers at a coffee-house: after which I
sometimes passed the night in reading at home, but most commonly
went to one of the theatres at half-price, where I gratified my violent
passion for the drama, which at once improved my understanding
and amused my mind.
This course of life, though it rapidly weakened my purse, was
rational, compared to that which I soon after led, and I might have
supported it with credit, by the indulgence of my friends, for a
considerable time. As the business of our office was of a various
nature, I soon gained great experience in the different branches of
common law, and conveyancing: I became by practice, an expert
and correct copyist; and I delighted much in studying the most
approved law books, reading reports of cases, &c. I became familiar
with Burn’s Justice, and soon gained a pretty correct knowledge of
the criminal law, and of those minute points, of which an able
counsel or attorney can avail himself, in order to rescue a client from
the claws of justice, howsoever glaring and palpable his guilt may
be. Such is the glorious uncertainty of the English law! Little did I
then conceive how useful this knowledge might one day prove to
myself; of which more hereafter. I merely pursued this intricate study
by way of exercising my ingenuity and gratifying my curiosity.
I must here inform the reader, that these various pursuits and
studies were not confined to the short term of my continuance in the
employ of which I am now writing. After I quitted the office of Messrs.
M⸺ and P⸺, and during the course of a wild and dissipated life,
they formed one of my favourite domestic amusements; as did in fact
reading in general: and throughout the most profligate stages of my
future career, which I shall hereafter narrate, a portion of my time
was always devoted to the perusal of books, and a part of my
money, however hardly or dishonestly obtained, to the purchase of
them: and to this moment I still consider them the most valuable
property a man of my disposition can possess.
About three months after my arrival in town, I began to grow less
regular in my manner of life; my expenses increased; and I became
negligent of the office hours. I had contracted an intimacy with
several young persons of both sexes, which unavoidably engaged
me in a course of expensive dissipation, to which my means were
inadequate. Though I occasionally derived small supplies from my
grandfather, yet as he had no idea of the extent of my expenditure,
they were comparatively trifling. Mr. P⸺ finding I was not to be
reclaimed by advice, and having no authority to use any other
means, at length for the credit of his office, and for fear I should
contaminate the other clerks, gave me a formal, though civil
dismissal, which I received without surprise, as I knew I had long
deserved it.
I was now tired of the law, or rather of the restraint I was under, in
an office of that description; but still I found it necessary to have
some employment, as well to amuse me, as to contribute to my
support.
I therefore engaged myself as assistant in the warehouse of
Messrs. Key and Sons, wholesale stationers in Abchurch-lane,
Lombard-street, at a weekly salary of one guinea; which was more
by half than I had received from my last employers, and equal to the
pay of an experienced clerk in an attorney’s office at that time of day.
This situation I obtained through the interest of one of my fellow-
rakes, the son of a substantial citizen, who roundly vouched for my
integrity and diligent conduct. My employment here was to
superintend the packing of goods for exportation and home
consumption; to write invoices; copy letters; ship goods at the
Custom-house, &c. I continued, however, but a short time in this
situation; confinement to the east end of the town prevented my
associating with my old acquaintances, who chiefly dwelt in the
environs of Covent-garden, or the purlieus of Drury-lane.
During an abode of ten months in London, as I was frequently
pushed for money, I availed myself of a genteel appearance, and
pretty good address, and taking advantage of the credulity of several
tradesmen in the neighbourhood, I ordered wearing apparel of
various kinds, and sometimes other goods, upon credit, without
much concern about the day of payment; however I always took care
to procure a bill of parcels with the articles, which precluded any
charge of fraud, and left the matter at the worst but a debt
contracted; for which, being a minor, I knew I could not be arrested.
This was my first deviation from honesty, since I left Liverpool. I was
also frequently obliged to change my lodgings; and, as payment of
my rent would have required ready money, for which I had so many
other uses, I commonly decamped under favour of the night, having
previously removed my effects by various stratagems. As I was
ashamed to let my grandfather know the true state of my affairs, and
as I really grieved at the expenses I had already caused him, which I
knew had much inconvenienced him, I forbore at last, to trouble him
for remittances; but falsely assured him that I was doing well, and
enabled to live upon the profits of my industry. I desired he would
abandon the idea of articling me to the law, as the expenses
attending admission had of late years been so much increased by
stamp duties; and as I could, if I continued the study, at a future
period, practise under the sanction of another person’s name; a
custom then very prevalent, though irregular. By these assurances I
quieted the good old man, and silenced any inquiries my friends
might have instituted respecting me; as I now really wished to
continue free from all restraint upon my person or actions, and
foolishly flattered myself that I should by some lucky event, ultimately
secure the means of independence. These conjectures were,
however, perfectly vague, and proceeding from no fixed idea
whatever.
On quitting my city employment, I returned to the law, for which I
still retained a partiality; and obtained a more liberal salary than
before in an office equally respectable. Indeed I was now become
more useful, and had improved much both in person and address
since my arrival in town.
I was still frequently reduced to pecuniary straits, and obliged to
have recourse to various expedients, known only to men of the town,
for my support: some of them indeed were bordering on dishonesty,
and none of them very honourable. But to describe them individually,
is impossible, and a man who lives by his wits, as the phrase is, will
assure you, if called to account, that he really could not for his life,
tell by what distinct means he makes out a living.
As I now wrote uncommonly fast, I quitted the station of a weekly
clerk, and obtained writings to copy by the sheet, from the law
stationers, by which I could earn considerably more money; and in
this employment I continued to labour diligently for several hours
every day, and sometimes half the night.
When I had a mind to relax from this occupation, and particularly if
my finances were at a low ebb, I frequently resorted to the Blue Lion,
in Gray’s-Inn-Lane, a house noted for selling fine ale, and crowded
every night with a motley assemblage of visiters, among whom were
many thieves, sharpers and other desperate characters, with their
doxies. I was introduced to this house (from which hundreds of
young persons may date their ruin) by a fellow-clerk, who appeared
to have a personal intimacy with most of these obnoxious persons;
however, though I listened eagerly to their conversation, (part of
which was then unintelligible to me), and fancied them people of
uncommon spirit, I was not yet sufficiently depraved to cultivate their
acquaintance; but sat with a pipe in my mouth, enveloped in smoke,
ruminating like a philosopher on the various characters who tread
the great stage of life, and felt a sort of secret presentiment, that I
was myself born to undergo a more than common share of
vicissitudes and disappointments. How far these ideas were well
grounded, the reader will judge when he has perused this narrative,
of which I shall here close the fourth Chapter.
 CHAPTER V.
The Trip to Portsmouth.

During my nightly resorts to the Blue Lion, in Gray’s-Inn-Lane, I

one evening fell into conversation, at that house, with a young man
of decent appearance, a few years older than myself. We were so
mutually pleased with each other, that at parting, an appointment to
breakfast together the next morning was the consequence, and on
this second meeting, our intimacy so far increased, that we began to
explain our respective situations in life to each other. My new
acquaintance, whose name was D⸺, informed me that he had
lately quitted His Majesty’s Ship Montague, of 74 guns, on board of
which he had served as Steward to the Commander, Captain
Patterson. That having lived freely for some months on shore, he
had now spent all his money, and was so much reduced, that he
really knew not how to subsist any longer, and concluded with
expressing his intention to proceed immediately to Portsmouth, in
the hope of obtaining a similar birth to his former one. I assured him
that I was, like himself, so much reduced, as to find the utmost
difficulty in existing at all, and that if he would permit me to join my
fortune to his, I should without hesitation feel happy in the
opportunity of accompanying him to Portsmouth in quest of some
employment. He declared that nothing would afford him greater
pleasure, and it was agreed that we should, each of us without delay,
convert our spare apparel, &c., into cash, and set out the very next
day. I accordingly lost no time in the needful preparations, and
having bilked my landlord, with whom I was some few weeks in
arrears, I met D⸺, the same evening, and after indulging in a
farewell cruize, which sensibly diminished our slender finances, we
took a few hours’ repose, and at eight o’clock the next morning,
commenced our peregrination.