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How coaching can help rewire your brain

Tom Flatau
Thu Apr 30, 2015 11:06 AM

In order for people to learn new things,

or to change unhelpful behaviours,
they have to create new neuronal
connections and hardwire new maps
into their brains. This cannot happen
through ‘telling’ - it can only happen
through their own thinking. The role of
the coach is to encourage such
thinking through generous listening
and skilful questioning, says Tom
Flatau
Coaching is a skill that has one of the highest
returns on investment ​ one study reported it at
800%. So it is not surprising that once your
managers start coaching, you can expect
breakthrough results for your entire
organisation.
For over two decades people have known the power of coaching rather than ‘telling’. Yet the default technique for managers
still remains the telling approach. I admit, in a bid to reach goals, it is tempting to direct – but when we ‘tell’ people what to do
we only get limited results. Telling does little to help them, or the team, further down the line.

On the other hand, coaching people to work things out for themselves and find their own solutions has a huge impact on
performance, and ultimately frees up a manager’s precious time. Neuroscience research reveals that learning new things and
changing unhelpful behaviours can only be done by creating and practicing new habits – which wires new maps into the brain.

No two people can possibly have the same brain. As we go through life having experiences, our brains are continually making
new neuronal connections. The more these connections are used, the more they become hard-wired, creating a unique
landscape. As an analogy, think how a stream carves its way through the land, eventually becoming the Grand Canyon.

Because of this uniqueness, we all experience reality, learn, and make sense of the world in very different ways. This is why
the telling approach is ineffective. If we tell someone how to do something, we are operating from our own brain’s map of the
world, not theirs. What makes sense to us doesn’t necessarily make sense to someone else.

The two key tools of coaching, generous listening and asking questions, work so well because they stimulate people to think
for themselves and come to their own conclusions. Every ‘aha’ moment is a new circuit being wired into the brain.
That is why I am a firm believer in managers adopting a coaching rather than telling approach. Coaching doesn’t generally
over-analyse unhelpful thoughts and behaviours as this can embed them even more. Instead, the coach will help the coachee
focus on the all-important acquisition of new, more meaningful maps (new perspectives).

Once these new maps have been created, practice is essential to embed the new thinking, and a coaching manager must
support an employee in using these new paths, especially in the early stages when the temptation to revert is strong.

Remember! An old path never disappears. This explains why we sometimes have set backs – particularly if we are stressed,
and we revert back to old habits. But as we use the new path more and more, the old one starts to get over-grown and less
attractive to use.

To give an example, I once had a sales person in my team who was convinced she was lousy at her job. My telling her she
was good simply fell on deaf ears because my map did not correlate with her deeply embedded neuronal map.

Things only changed when I stopped asking ‘Why?’ questions, and instead asked her to give me a daily example of her good
work. Over time this helped her to create a new map and repetition strengthened this neuronal pathway.

A coaching-management style can double the productivity (and engagement) of employees. So what is the lesson for a
manager who wants to improve staff performance?

That’s right – resist the temptation of telling, and instead listen and ask questions until they come up with the answers for
themselves. That, in a nutshell is coaching!
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