Nice Girls Don't Get The Corner Office

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overwork and underappreciation.

Another self-sabotaging behavior is downplaying


achievements. Women often attribute their
successes to external factors such as luck or
teamwork rather than acknowledging their own
skills and efforts. This modesty can lead to being
overlooked for promotions or key projects as they
are not seen as leaders or high performers.

Additionally, women may engage in


self-deprecating talk. Phrases like “I’m not sure,
but…” or “This might be a stupid question…”
undermine their authority and expertise. Such
language casts doubt on their competence and
erodes professional credibility.

Perfectionism is another critical behavior that


can stymie career growth. The pursuit of
flawlessness not only delays project completion
but also hampers bold decision-making and
risk-taking, both of which are essential for career
advancement. By seeking unattainable standards,

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women may also become less productive and
more susceptible to burnout.

The fear of self-promotion is yet another hurdle.


Many women worry that advocating for their
skills and accomplishments will make them seem
boastful or arrogant. This fear often results in
missed opportunities where others who are more
vocal about their achievements receive
recognition and advancement.

Recognizing these self-sabotaging behaviors is the


first step toward change. By becoming aware of
and actively addressing these patterns, women
can start to reshape their professional image and
trajectory. Acknowledging personal
achievements, setting boundaries, and confidently
voicing ideas are ways to combat these
detrimental habits. By doing so, women can pave
the way for greater career success and
professional fulfillment.

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and competence. Frankel suggests that instead of
saying "I'm sorry," women should try rephrasing
their statements to express the same sentiment
without diminishing their authority. For example,
instead of "I'm sorry I'm late," one could say,
"Thank you for waiting for me."

Another common mistake is using minimizing


language or qualifiers, such as "I think," "I'm no
expert but," or "This might be a silly idea, but."
These phrases can make strong contributions
seem tentative. Women should aim to express
their ideas more assertively by stating their
opinions confidently and without unnecessary
qualifiers.

Non-verbal communication also plays a crucial


role. For instance, body language that signals
uncertainty or lack of self-assurance, such as
avoiding eye contact, slouching, or fidgeting, can
negatively impact how others perceive one's
professional presence. Maintaining good posture,
making eye contact, and using deliberate and

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controlled gestures can greatly enhance one's
credibility.

Practical tips for assertive and effective


communication

To communicate more assertively and effectively,


Frankel provides several practical tips:

1. **Use Clear and Direct Language**: Be


concise and to the point. Avoid beating around
the bush, which can be perceived as
indecisiveness.
2. **Own Your Statements**: Use "I" statements
to take responsibility for your opinions and
actions. For example, "I believe" instead of "We
think."
3. **Practice Active Listening**: Show
engagement and respect in conversations by
listening carefully, nodding, and providing
feedback. This builds rapport and demonstrates
leadership.
4. **Avoid Questioning Your Own Statements**:

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Phrasing statements as questions, such as "Does
that make sense?" or "Right?" at the end of
sentences can undermine your authority. Instead,
trust that your points are clear and valid.
5. **Be Mindful of Your Tone**: Strive for a tone
that is firm yet warm. Avoid a high-pitched or
overly soft voice that can be perceived as lacking
conviction.
6. **Use Strategic Pauses**: Pausing can
emphasize important points and give the
impression of thoughtfulness. It also allows your
listeners to digest what you've said.
7. **Develop a Strong Handshake**: A firm
handshake communicates confidence and
professionalism. Practice this with friends or
colleagues until it feels natural.

By implementing these tips and being mindful of


both verbal and non-verbal cues, women can
build a more assertive and effective
communication style that bolsters their
professional credibility and paves the way for
career advancement. Frankel's advice offers a

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blueprint for transforming communication habits
to better navigate the complexities of the
workplace and achieve long-term success.

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