The Shariah rules relating to mixing between the sexes

In Islam, the basic principle of the interaction between men and women is segregation. This
means that in all areas of life and in all places whether private or public, contact between men
and women is generally prohibited. Many evidences establish the principle of not mixing
between the sexes, and there are many ahadith which clarify that this is the case in both
public and private areas:

Abu Dawud narrated the following ahadith: The Prophet (saw) said, “The best row for men is
the front row, (furthest from the women’s row) and the best row for women is the back row
and the worst is the front row (just behind the men).” The Prophet (saw) saw men and women
outside the mosque moving side by side in the crowd. He stopped the women saying, “It is not
proper for you to walk in the middle of the path, you had better walk along the walls.”

In Abu Dawud, p.284, Hadith No. 4931, it is narrated upon the authority of Aisha (ra) that she
said: "I used to play with my friends and whenever the Prophet (saw) entered they would leave
and whenever he (saw) went out they would come back in."

In Abu Dawud Hadith No.4933, it is narrated that Aisha (ra) said: "The Prophet married me at
seven and we had relationship at nine and when I moved to medina some women prepared me
for the wedding and they nor I ever mixed with men in a house of women. The women received
me and men received the Prophet and then we went to the house."

In Abu Dawud V.4, p.370, Hadith No .5273, it is narrated upon the authority of Nafih that the
Messenger Muhammad (saw) said, "Do not walk between two men or between two women in
the street."

This means that the Muslims should avoid contact with members of the opposite sex, whether
Muslim or not, as a general rule. However, there are exceptions to this general rule, where the
mixing or interaction between men and women is permitted in certain situations.

For example, it is permitted for men and women who are mahram to each other to mix freely
for any purpose that Islam permits. As well, there are certain areas where it is permitted for
non-mahram men and woman to interact with each other, such as for the purpose of da‘wah
(invitation to Islam). However, the type of mixing that can occur here is not free, and is
restricted by the Shari‘ah to be within certain guidelines and boundaries, and the Muslim must
be sure to understand these before any type of mixing takes place.

The ahkam (rules) to do with mixing also vary with regard to the kind of place in which the
mixing occurs.

In an Islamic society, there are two types of areas where men and women come into contact
with each other, which are quite different in their descriptions and in the ahkam (rules) which
relate to them. The nature of the interaction between people in them may involve the mixing
among men, among women, and between men and women. These are:

The Public Areas - These consist of areas wherein anybody can be present without permission,
e.g. the mosque, the streets etc.

The Private Areas - These are areas where permission is required to enter them, such as
houses. In such areas, it is forbidden to enter without permission, or even to look inside. Sahl
ibn Sa’ad narrated, “A man peeped through a round hole into the dwelling place of the Prophet
(saw) while he had an iron comb with which he was scratching his head. He (saw) said, ‘Had I
known you were looking (through the hole) I would have pierced your eye with it (the comb).
Verily, the order of taking permission to enter (a dwelling place) has been enjoined because of
that sight (that one should not look unlawfully at the state of others)’. ” [Bukhari]

Allah (swt) says:

“O you who believe, don’t enter houses other than your own until you have asked permission
and saluted those in them, that is best for you, in order that you may heed (what is seemly). If
you find no one in the house, don’t enter until permission is given to you; if you are asked to go
back, go back; that makes for greater purity for yourselves, and Allah knows well all that you
do).” [TMQ An-Nur: 27-28]

It was deduced from these verses that the place which is considered a house and upon which
the rules of the private life apply is the one no one from outside is allowed to enter it except
with a permission. In such place, the woman has special rules, to which the term of private life
was given. This applies to that known as house or home. It was compared to it, by analogy, the
places that are closed to the public i.e. in those areas which nobody is allowed to enter unless
he had a special permission. However if those areas can be seen by people outside of them for
example if they were made of transparent glass, where their inside is exposed to the public,
then they are considered public places. Similarly, the places open to the public, wherever
anybody has an enquiry or a transaction can enter, such offices are not subject to the rules of
the private life.

Islam defines rules and laws which regulate the relationships between men and women in each
of these spheres.

The Private Life

This concerns the conduct of people when they are in the private areas. Here, the principle is
that mixing between unrelated (non-mahram) men and women is forbidden as a general rule.
However, the Shari‘ah gives permit for mixing to occur under certain special circumstances. In
all these cases, a woman cannot be in Khalwa (seclusion) with another man alone. These areas
include:

1) Medicine: It is allowed for men and women to mix for the purpose of seeking medical
treatment. The Sahabiyat used to treat the Sahaba and the Prophet (saw) consented to that.

2) Da’wa: It is allowed for men and women to be present in the same class if the purpose of
their mixing is learning about Islam or other types of education permitted by the Shari‘ah. The
sister of Umar (ra) was being taught from the Quran by Khabab ibn Arrat (ra) with her husband
when Umar entered upon them. It has been narrated that Umm Salamah and Aisha (ra) who
used to do da'wa to men and women

3) Marriage: If a man is looking to marry a woman then he is allowed to talk to her about issues
related to finding out about her and related to the marriage. A man came to the Messenger
Muhammad (saw) to ask about marrying a girl and the Prophet (saw) told him to go and see her
i.e. see her in her Mahram’s presence.

4) Duress or Compulsion: At times of absolute necessity or emergency, such as earthquakes,

war or hurricanes, the necessary mixing is permitted for men and women in order to remove
any danger or threat.

5) State arrest: The evidence for this is from Uthman and Umar (ra) said, "O women, cover
yourselves we are entering" and he entered a house to arrest someone with his army and there
was Ijma of the Sahaba (consensus of the companions) on this.
6) Eating: In Surah Nur Allah (SWT) says:

“The blind is not to be blamed, the crippled is not to be blamed, nor is the handicapped to be
blamed, just as you are not to be blamed for eating at your homes, or the homes of your
fathers, or the homes of your mothers, or the homes of your brothers, or the homes of your
sisters, or the homes of your fathers' brothers, or the homes of your fathers' sisters, or the
homes of your mothers' brothers, or the homes of your mothers' sisters, or the homes that
belong to you and you possess their keys, or the homes of your friends. You commit nothing
wrong by eating together or as individuals. When you enter any home, you shall greet each
other a greeting from Allah that is blessed and good. Allah thus explains the revelations for
you, that you may understand.” [TMQ 24:61]

For men and women to eat together is permitted in the places mentioned in the verse such as
the home of your fathers or your friends as it says, “You commit nothing wrong by eating
together or as individuals”.

However people should be careful that even though eating together with the women at a
friends house is permitted that they should leave once they have eaten and beware of
socialisation with the opposite sex which would be exceeding the permit.

7) Silat ar-rahm (maintaing the relationship between kith and kin): It is allowed for non-
maharam relatives to sit with their non-maharam (people to whom marriage is permitted) for
the sake of silat ar-rahm as long as it is without khalwah (privacy). There exist a number of
hadith concerning the keeping of good relations with the relatives.

It was narrated by Anas b. Malik that the Messenger of Allah (saw) said: "Whoever loves that he
be granted more wealth, and that his lease of life be prolonged, then he should keep good
relations with his kith and kin". It is narrated by Abu Hurayra that the Prophet (saw) said: "Allah
created His creation, and when He finished it, the womb got up and said, I seek refuge with
you from Al-qatia (ties being severed with me)". On that Allah (swt) said: "Don’t you accept
that I bestow my favours on him who keeps your ties, and withhold My favours from him who
severes your ties?" On that it said, "Yes, Oh my Lord!" Then Allah (swt) said: "That is for you".

The Public Life

This concerns the conduct of people when they are in the public areas. Here again, the
principle is that mixing between unrelated (non-mahram) men and women is forbidden as a
general rule. However, the Shari‘ah gives permit for mixing (in the sense of presence in the
same area) to occur under certain special circumstances. In all these cases, it is not a condition
that a woman has a mahram in her presence. The areas can be broadly categorised to include:

1) Hajj: Through the Prophets (saw) consent.

2) Trade/hiring: This includes markets/shops, buying, selling, hiring, borrowing and lending.
Tirmidhi narrated that the Messenger Muhammad (saw) traded with women, and Abu Bakr saw
the Messenger Muhammad (saw) trade with a woman.

3) Work: If the nature of the work means that one needs to mix then there is a permit. Work
involves looking for work e.g. interviews, etc. The Messenger Muhammad (saw) permitted
Zubayr Ibn Awwam's wife to work. She carried water both to men and women. The Messenger
even offered his camel to assist her.

4) Every day life affairs: This involves the unavoidable interaction between men and women in
areas like streets, markets, restaurants, etc.

Special cases within the Public life

There are private places upon which the rules of private life apply, such as houses. There are
public places upon which the rules of the public life apply, such as the markets. There are
public places with special rules like separating men from women, such as the mosques and
attending the public talks at lecture theatres and the like which are compared by analogy.

The Prophet (saw) said, “The best row for men is the front row, (furthest from the women’s
row) and the best row for women is the back row and the worst is the front row (just behind
the men).” [Abu Dawud]

In Abu Dawud Kitab Al Salat, V.1, in the Chapter on Segregation, it is narrated that Umar bin Al
Khattab (ra) said: "Make a special door for women in the mosques."

So in the markets, it is not a condition that men separate from women during trading. But in
the mosque and the lecture hall, the separation of men from women is a condition. The
Messenger Muhammad (saw) used to address men and women in the mosque in medina, men in
front and women behind. Similarly, in the hospitals the sections of men should be separated
from the sections of women.

In all these cases, where men and women are present at the same time, there must not be free
mixing, where both sexes are mingling with each other. The general rule is that any contact
between members of the opposite sex is minimised as much as possible, so any contact
between members of the opposite sex must be necessary to the business at hand. Thus in the
Islamic State, for example, in the trains or buses there would be separate areas for men and
women.

In any case, the activities which are occurring must be halal (i.e. permitted) in nature.
Accordingly, mixing between non-mahram men and women for the purpose of amusement,
leisure-activities or entertainment is strictly prohibited. Thus issues such as
boyfriend/girlfriend relationships, dating, or enjoying leisure and company with unrelated
women is haram. However, Islam does see these types of activities as acceptable, but only
when regulated within the framework of marriage.

Weddings

Mixing (ikhtilaat) is not allowed unless it is for a need recognised by the Shariah for which
there is a text in the Book of Allah or the Sunnah of His Messenger (saw) such as buying, selling,
silat rahm (maintaining relations with kith and kin), etc.

There is no text regarding the mixing of men and women in halls for wedding celebrations.
Rather what has been mentioned in the time of the Messenger of Allah and his Sahabah is that
the women used to sit with the bride on their own and the men used to sit on their own. Thus,
mixing in halls is Haraam and no exception is made for it.

In Abu Dawud Hadith No.4933, it is narrated that Aisha (ra) said: "The Prophet married me at
seven and we had relationship at nine and when I moved to medina some women prepared me
for the wedding and they nor I ever mixed with men in a house of women. The women received
me and men received the Prophet and then we went to the house."

What has been reported with respect to the wedding feasts is the wedding procession when the
woman is taken to her husband’s house. It is allowed for men and women to take her to her
husband’s house and then the men should separate form the women since this has been the
established during the time of the Messenger of Allah (saw) and he approved of it. This
occurred outside and therefore falls under the rules of the public place.

Khalwa (Seclusion)

Khalwa relates to the presence of a non-mahram man and woman being on their own together
without the presence of a mahram or any other person. This could happen in a private place,
or a public place. In either case khalwa is forbidden from Islam, and both the man and woman
involved are sinful.

Khalwa in a Private Place: This could occur in any place that requires permission for entry,
such as a house or bedroom in a residence building.

Khalwa in a Public Place: This could occur in any public place whose nature is that no other
people would be likely to pass by or come there. An example of such a place would be in a
forest or an isolated room in an office.

Muhammad (saw) said, “If a man and a woman are alone together in an isolated place, then
the third is Shaitan.” Bukhari narrated that the Prophet (saw) said, “No man should stay with a
lady in seclusion except in the presence of a mahram to her.” A man stood up and said, “O
Rasul Allah! My wife has gone out intending to perform the Hajj and I have been enrolled in the
army for such and such a campaign.” The Prophet (saw) said, “Return and perform the Hajj
with your wife.”

Modesty and Lowering the Gaze

Part of the provision of maintaining the dignity and honour of men and women in Islam is in the
regulation of the way they are regarded by each other. It is forbidden for the Muslim man to
look at any woman with lustful intentions, except for his wife. The same is true for a Muslim
woman with regard to other men.

Rather, the emphasis is on lowering the gaze away from members of the opposite sex at times
when they are present, like in the streets or the market place. Allah (swt) says,

“Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty, that will
make for greater purity for them, and Allah is well acquainted with all that they do. And say to
the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty.” [TMQ 24:30-
31]

Jarir ibn ‘Abdullah reported, “I asked Allah’s Messenger about the sudden glance (that is cast)
on the face (of a non-mahram). He commanded me that I should turn away my eyes.” [Muslim]

This reflects the principle that the way that Muslim men and women view each other is
completely different to the way of the West, where women are seen as sex objects, and
respect of both men and women in this context is almost non-existent. Indeed, if it does exist
at all, the criteria upon which it is based mainly concerns the superficial physical attributes.
Allah (swt) says:

“And the believers, the men and women, are protecting friends of one another, they bid to
honour and forbid dishonour, they perform the prayer, and they pay the alms, and they obey
Allah and His Messenger. Upon them Allah will have mercy.” [TMQ 9:71]

This aspect of the Social System of the Islamic State will prevent exploitation of women in
pornography, or the use of their bodies as an enticement for people to buy products.
Additionally, in the media as a whole, whether on television, magazines, newspapers or films,
neither men nor women will be portrayed in roles where they reveal their awrah, or involve in
activities that are forbidden in Islam.

Thus the sexual bombardment from the media that is faced by people in the West, and the
distorted image of men and women that this builds in the mind, will be absent in the Islamic
State.