on Oreo ul akie Paragraph Create a word picture of: > A person (for instance, your best friend) Your Goal > A place (or instance, your favorite spot) >A thing (for instance, a precious object) > Helps us see something clearly in our mind Description » Explores three or four key points one by one > Explores the points in detail > Often uses many adjectives to give I Puanguage ff” Mecsas > Shows color, shape, mood, texture, personality, and many other things > Appeals to the five senses (sight, Characteristics sound, smell, taste, touch) > Uses similes ("He is brave, like a lion.”) > Uses metaphors (“She is the sunshine in my life) > Avoid overly emotional words (lke “wonderful” or “terrible"). Caution > Avoid exclamations (like “So cute!” or “How nice!”) 28Unit Descriptive Paragraph Example Descriptive Paragraph: Place ‘The Pasta Factory: Good Food and Good Atmosphere Do you have a favorite restaurant? My favorite restaurant is The Pasta Factory because I love the atmosphere, service, and food. Ihe atmosphere of ‘the Pasta Factory is great. People talk and laugh. There is the smell of freshly baked bread. Soft light comes from antique lamps. ‘There are many old photos on the walls. It feels like the “good old day .” The service at The Pasta Factory is very good. The waiters and waitresses are all cheerful and polite. They bring you your food quickly, and come by often to give you more water, drinks, bread, or pizza ‘The best thing about The Pasta Factory is the food. ‘The basic cours is salad, bread, pasta, and a drink. However, you also get thin crust pizza whenever you want it. The pizza is always hot, fresh, and tasty. | always leave ‘The Pasta Factory feeling happy and satisfied. I hope you try it some day Example Descriptive Paragraph: Thing My Battered Bat Most people have a treasured possession which may not look valuable to other people. The one that is most precious to me is my baseball bat. It is not a fancy aluminum bat, but an old wooden one. It has scratches and dents all over it, and the handles stained with years of sweat. However, all of these marks make my bat more special. They remind me of all the practices and games I had, in sun or rain or dust or mud, and all the good memories I made with my friends and teammates. My bat has been my faithful and trusted companion over all those years. I still take my bat to the batting range. It has a nice, comforting weight in my hands, and the grip is smooth and warm. When I swing the bat, it flows like part of my body, and when it hits the ball there is a satisfying cracking sound as it drives that ball deep into the distance. All of these things make my bat very important to me. It has been with me many years, and I hope to ha many, many more. Find the words or phrases that appeal to the five senses (sight, sound, smell, touch, and taste). Notice the colors in the paragraphs. What do you think they mean?‘Types of Paragraphs a ] Prewriting for a Descriptive Paragraph Let's begin finding and exploring topics for your own paragraph. Look at the ideas below to help you decide on a good topic. Good Topic Type: _Itisaperson, place, or thing that can be described concretely, if possible using some of the five senses (sight, sound, smell, taste, touch). Size: _It should not be too big—your paragraph will be too long. If itis too small, your paragraph will be too short. Your paragraph should be longer than a few lines, but less than a full page. Interest: It should be a person, place, or thing that can interest or fascinate readers. Exercise | Identifying Good Descriptive Paragraph Topics Are these good topics? If yes, put a circle in the Good column. If not, what is wrong with the topic? Put an X in the column indicating what is wrong. There may be more than one thing wrong. = a What is wrong with the toy Type | Size | Interest Topics Good 3, Agreat park near my house 4. Mygreen socks 5,_ Mygolden retriever, Buddy | 6. Love ea ee 7._ My most precious possession 8. European cities 9._ All the members of my water polo team 10. My room Find Your Topic Find a topic by doing the following steps. Step 4: Look at the possible topics below. Choose a topic, or maybe something on this list will inspire you to come up with your own topic. 30Unit Deseriptive Paragraph Possible Topics Person: a friend, a family member, a relative, a teacher, a coach, a celebrity, an actor or actress, a musician, a public figure, a classmate, a mysterious stranger, an annoying person, someone on the street, an imaginary friend Place: a park, a restaurant, a store, a street, a town, a resort, a home, a room, a building, a theme park, a beach, a mountain, a fun spot, a scary spot ‘Thing: a precious possession, a doll, a toy, a souvenir, an animal, a clothing item, a bag, a vehicle, a tool, a device, an accessory, a piece of furniture, a favorite food item, a song, an album, a photo, a painting, a picture Step 2: Choose one topic that you think is the most interesting and would be easy to write as a Descriptive Paragraph. Write it below, Explore Your Topic Now that you have a topic, explore it by doing the following steps. Step 4: Freewriting—Write as much as you can on the topic you chose without stop for ten minutes. (Don't worry about grammar or spelling at this point.) Write it below and share your topic with a partner or in a small group. {My Freewriting] Step 2: Go back over your Freewriting above. Add important things that are missing. Cross out things that are not so important. 3‘Types of Paragraphs o Organizing a Descriptive Paragraph itis easy to organize a Descriptive Paragraph. Look at the diagram and example below to learn how. i jinning Senten« oe Cones Beginning Sentence 4. Key Point 1 Middle Supporting Sentences 2. Key Point 2 3. Key Point 3 Concluding Sentence Interesting Ending Sentence Example Descriptive Paragraph: Person My BFF, Anna Sometimes we see the letters “BEF,” which mean “best friends forever.” My “BEF” is Anna, and we have known each other since we were ten years old. ‘Anna is tall and slender like a gazelle, and has big eyes that always look sleepy. She has a small, straight nose and beautiful white teeth like perfect little pearls. A special thing about Anna is her style. These days she wears her hair in friz. pigtails. She likes to wear jeans, sneakers, and letterman jackets. The best thing about Anna is her personality. She has a loud, bright laugh, like a bell. She likes to tell jokes and gossip, but she is really kind and always listens to my troubles, She is the sunshine in my life. [am glad to have Anna as my best friend. “BFF” may sound silly, but I think Anna really will be my best friend forever. Which words or phrases appeal to the five senses? How many adjectives, similes and metaphors can you find in this paragraph? Organize Your Paragraph Now, organize your paragraph by doing the following steps. Step 4: Using your Freewriting and the diagram above, write an Outline. ‘Step 2: Make sure to add important details and to take out unimportant details,Unit Descriptive Paragraph g 3 Writing a Descriptive Paragraph You are ready to start writing your paragraph now. Write a complete paragraph, following your Outline. Try some of the suggested ways and expressions below. A. Some ways to start a Descriptive Paragraph Start with a question, a famous saying or proverb, a reflection, a strong comment, or a definition from the dictionary. > Whatis your most precious possession? {Question} > ‘They say blood is thicker than water, and itis true. [Saying or proverb] > When we think of home, we think of the place we are most comfortable. [Reflection] » There are many places that are special to me, but one is the most special of all. [Strong comment] » ‘The dictionary defines pen as “an instrument for writing or drawing with ink or similar fluid,” but an expensive pen is also a status symbol. [Di jonary definition] B. Common ways to write a topic sentence The topic sentence has to present the main idea of the paragraph. j > My most precious possession is my black hat. > My favorite spot is the lake outside my city. > My brother and I are like best friends. C. Useful techniques, words, and expressions 1. Use many adjectives Instead of writing “I saw a dog,” you can write “I saw a large, yellow dog.” 2. Be specific “I saw a large, yellow Golden Retriever.” 3. Use your five senses (sight, sound, smell, taste, touch) “saw large, yellow Golden Retriever. Its coat was smooth and a lovely gold, like it had just been brushed. Its nose was cold and black. It smelled like flowery soap because it was just washed. It was barking noisily because it was happy to see me. 33‘Types of Paragraphs Examples Sight words: color (red, orange, violet), brightness, darkness, size (large, tiny, narrow), shape (round, square, narrow), condition (neat, messy, clean), style (fashionable, retro, gothic), personal attributes (tall, slim, short hair, thin lips), clothing (lacy blouse, jeans, T-shirt) Sound words: volume (loud, soft), tone (whisper, murmur), emotions (shout, scream, cry), actions (slap, splash, crash, crack) ‘Smell and taste words: sensations (bitter, sweet, sour, acrid, moldy, spicy, fruity, stinky, delicious) Touch words: other sensations (dry, hot, wet, damp, cool, windy, cold, icy, rough, soft, smooth, furry) 4. Use metaphors and similes > Ametaphor compares two things by saying one thing is another: is heart is gold.” (He is kind and generous) “She is a lion!” (She is fierce and brave.) » Asimile compares two things by using the words “like” or “as” “His heart is like gold.” “She is as brave as a lion.” » Here isan example describing the dog using both metaphor and simile: “ saw a large, beautiful Golden Retriever. It had just been washed and brushed. Its coat was a smooth, shiny blanket of gold. Its fresh soapy smell filled the air like sunshine. He barked noisily but happily, like a childhood friend meeting me for the first time in many years.” Common ways to write a concluding sentence The concluding sentence has to restate (say again) the main idea. » ‘This is why I love my friend Mei. > Itis the most useful thing I own, and also the most valuable. » Lam grateful for my peaceful little spot by the lake. Useful ways to end a Descriptive Paragraph End with a strong comment or reflection, or an appeal or invitation. » Nobody in my life could ever replace her. [Comment or reflection] » Itwill always be my most treasured possession. [Comment or reflection] » hope you visit it sometime! [Appeal or invitation] 34Unit. Deseriptive Paragraph Exercise 2 The Five Senses, Metaphors, and Similes In the blanks in front of the sentences, identify the descriptive technique being used. Write Sight, Sound, Smell, Taste, Touch, Metaphor, or Simile. When I see old trees, they often remind me of people. There is an old cherry tree by my house that is just like that. Lf | Itis like a kindly old woman with a walking stick, bent with years. 21 ] Itlooks old because the trunk and branches are thick and gnatly. a. [ |The bark has deep wrinkles and is rough to the touch. [ gl 4 | In summer, I can walk under the tree and feel its cool shade. 5. Toften hear the leaves of the tree rustling pleasantly in the wind. BP ly 6 | JItis an old friend, greeting me with kind whispers. mI | I can also hear the chattering of birds that gather in its branches. 8. | | In June, the tree produces cherries that are juicy and sweet. 9 | | In fall, the leaves turn lovely shades of red, yellow, and brown. 10. | They fall to the ground and give off a wet, earthy smell. 8 LL | Inwinter, my tree is delicately covered with patches of white snow. Pi love the old cherry tree. Someday, when I too am old and bent, I will remember my fine old cherry tree and smile. ‘The most important points in writing a Descriptive Paragraph are: 1. Use lots of adjectives, the five senses, metaphors, and similes to try to give a vivid word picture of what or whom you are describing. 2. Avoid overly emotional words and exctamations like “wonderful,” “terrible,” “So cute!” or “How nice!” 3. Do not start a sentence with the words “And ...” But ..." ‘So ..." or “Because ...” (Look at pages 22-23 for explanation and exercises.) 4. Avoid contractions. Instead of isn't, write is not. Instead of I'l, write | will, etc. 5. Do not forget to put your name and other information at the top of the page. (See page 15.) 6. Do not forget to make a ttle for your paragraph. (Look at page 24 for how to do this.)‘Types of Paragraphs ee Write Your Paragraph Write a paragraph by doing the following steps. Step 1: Choose an interesting way to begin your paragraph, and write the sentence. (See section A above.) Step 2: Write your topic in the Topic Sentence part. (See section B above.) Step 3: For each key point, write from your Outline (see page 32), using good descriptive words, expressions, and techniques. (See section C above.) Step 4: Write a concluding sentence that summarizes your paragraph. (See section D above.) Step 5: Write an interesting ending sentence. (See section E above.) a 4 Evaluating Your Descriptive Paragraph Evaluate your paper before you hand it in to the teacher so that you can improve it. Exercise 3 Avoiding Emotional Words and Exclamations In the paragraph below, find the parts that use emotional language or exclamations and cut them by drawing a line through them. If you have time, rewrite the paragraph without the emotional words or exclam: Which actor or actress do you like best? My favorite is Audrey Hepburn because she is beautiful, fashionable, and made great movies! First, she is so cute! I love her! She is slim, petite, and graceful. She is like alittle pixie. Her face is perfectly shaped, but also warm and sensitive. Her big brown eyes are lovely but also playful. Her voice is soft and ‘sweet. How beautiful she is! In addition, her fashion sense is outstanding. Her short haircut was trend setting, and even today itis still in style. So fashionable! In addition, ‘Audrey's movies are unforgettable. Her best movie is Roman Holiday. Itis so wonderful! love it so much! ¥ ¥ How beautiful she is! She plays the love scene with her reporterUnit Descriptive Paragraph friend with passion, and when they have to separate it is very moving. How sad! I cried and cried. For beauty, fashion, and classic movies, no actress can compare to Audrey. Audrey's work and ethereal beauty will always be with us. Audrey forever!!! Yay!!! Evaluate Your Paragraph Evaluate your paragraph by doing the following steps. Step 1: Go through the evaluation checklist (Appendix 5) for your paragraph. Step 2: Do a spelling and grammar check on your paragraph, using the computer. Step 3: Read your paragraph and evaluate it yourself. in pencil or black pen write in the changes you want to make. Have a classmate evaluate it. (See Appendix 3 for a sample Peer Evaluating sheet.) Step 5: Have your teacher evaluate it. Step a Rewriting Your Descriptive Paragraph Get the evaluations from your classmate and teacher. Rewrite Your Paragraph Rewrite your paragraph by doing the following steps. Step 1: Consider the advice given to you by the computer, your classmate, the teacher, and yourself. Step 2: Decide which advice to take and which to ignore. Step 3: Make the changes to your Draft 1 Step 4: Label it Draft 2 and change the date. Now you know how to write a Descriptive Paragraph!