One of the hardest lessons that I’ve ever learned

Is that something can hurt, like really hurt

Like bring you to your knees hurt, and still be the right
thing
I’ve been avoiding this for years, not because I don’t
think about you, or because life has moves so far, so
fast that I’ve forgotten the path that brought me here,
But because the opposite is true, because in a way you’ll
always be home and I’ll always have the proclivity
towards that calm, as much as my heads screams for
chaos, my heart begs for peace.. and what to make of
perpetual tug of war,
I don’t know…..
And guess life is just the funny thing, see I remember
you looking at me walked outside the door that day
Saying me that I believe that you’ll make it whatever
you do, I just hope you don’t get there and find yourself
alone,
And I think about that all the time, is my road
certainly has been a lonely one I’ll never forget feeling I
gave away one arm so that I could keep the other or
sitting there looking at the picture we hung, the
furniture we brought, the pile of clothes next to the
suitcase on the floor and thinking that the place where
we lived will always remind me of you, and that I had
to go, I’ll never forget seeing the skyline in the rearview
and thinking how absolutely insane it is to leave what
you love in pursuit of something that you don’t know
that can’t be explained, I couldn’t articulate it then and
I really still really can’t now, when to choose what you
know over what you feel? I don’t understand I guess life
is just a funny thing, and that next year well it was
the one most challenging of my life but who was I to let
you know to say anything…..
To start a fire and then to complain about the smoke
that pain that was mine to deal with but I worried, I
worried that maybe that you thought it was easy for me
that I carried on or brushed it off like it meant nothing
that you didn’t know how grateful I was for every
second with you, you know I get asked a lot about life
for someone who writes about it everyday I guess it sort
of comes with the territory.
But the truth is’ I will never be able to answer those
question been asked by you or anyone’….
Until time has told the story until history become the
judge whether our sacrifices are really worth it and
maybe that’s precisely what pulls me in,
“I guess life is just a funny thing”…..
And could it be that I find the top should I arrive to be a
lonely place,
‘sure’
But in all honesty I want it anyway more than life
itself I want it and I can’t justify it or rationalize it or
quantify it but I know it to be true,
I’m sure, wherever you are out there you’re doing
amazing inspiring others like you inspired me
brightening the day of the people around you like you
did mine, because the truth is I do love you….
And I always will even we were the two ships passing in
the night, that moment in time as much a part of me is
as I am a part of it and life that funny thing will most
definitely be better because you were, are, and will
continue to be a part of it…….
Sincerely yours,
All yours{the name}……