Name: My Duyen Date: ..../....

/2024

TED
To Love Is to Be Brave
Speaker: Kelly Corrigan

This is for my mom, even though when I ðɪs ɪz fɔː maɪ mɒm, ˈiːvᵊn ðəʊ wɛn aɪ kɔːld hɜː
called her to say, "Hey, have you heard of tuː seɪ, "heɪ, hæv juː hɜːd ɒv tɛd, tiː-iː-diː?" ʃiː sɛd,
TED, T-E-D?" She said, "Oh my God, Kelly, "əʊ maɪ ɡɒd, ˈkɛli, ɪts nɒt əˈnʌðə ˈvaɪərəs, ɪz
it's not another virus, is it?" ɪt?"
(Laughter) (ˈlɑːftə)

As a 21-year-old, I was drawn to the word æz eɪ 21-jɪər-əʊld, aɪ wɒz drɔːn tuː ðə wɜːd
brave. I had a soft spot for ripping yarns and breɪv. aɪ hæd ə sɒft spɒt fɔː ˈrɪpɪŋ jɑːnz ænd ðə
the people who could tell them. So, Odyssey ˈpiːpᵊl huː kʊd tɛl ðɛm. səʊ, ˈɒdɪsi ɒn ðə breɪn, aɪ
on the brain, I went out adventure wɛnt aʊt ədˈvɛnʧə kəˈlɛktɪŋ. wɪˈðaʊt ˈnəʊɪŋ haʊ
collecting. Without knowing how to spell tuː spɛl ˈstɑːbəd ɔː wɪʧ saɪd ɪt rɪˈfɜːd tuː, aɪ ɡɒt
starboard or which side it referred to, I got ɒn eɪ 46-fʊt bəʊt ænd aɪ seɪld frɒm ˈmɔːltə tuː
on a 46-foot boat and I sailed from Malta to tjuːˈnɪziə tuː ˈsɪsɪli.
Tunisia to Sicily.

aɪ ˈtrævᵊld 11,000 maɪlz ˈəʊvə 13 mʌnθs tuː

I traveled 11,000 miles over 13 months to
ˈsɛvᵊn ˈdɪfᵊrᵊnt ˈkʌntriz wɪˈðaʊt ə plæn ɔːr ə fəʊn
seven different countries without a plan or a
ɔːr ə ˈkrɛdɪt kɑːd. ʤʌst 3,800 ˈdɒləz ɪn ˈtrævᵊləz
phone or a credit card. Just 3,800 dollars in
ʧɛks, wɪʧ, ɪf jɔːr ˈʌndə 30,
traveler's checks, which, if you're under 30,
ɪt wɒz laɪk ə ˈlɪtᵊl ˈbʊklɪt ɒv ˈpɜːfəreɪtɪd, aɪ dəʊnt
it was like a little booklet of perforated, I
nəʊ.
don't know.
(ˈlɑːftə)
(Laughter)

ænd sʌm ɪkˈspaɪəd ˌæntibaɪˈɒtɪks maɪ mɒm

And some expired antibiotics my mom made
meɪd miː brɪŋ.
me bring.
(ˈlɑːftə)
(Laughter)

ænd ðɛn, ˈrʌnɪŋ aʊt ɒv ˈmʌni, aɪ ˈlændɪd æz ə

And then, running out of money, I landed as
ˈnæni fɔː tuː kɪdz, fɔːr ænd ˈsɛvᵊn, huː hæd ʤʌst
a nanny for two kids, four and seven, who
lɒst ðeə mɒm. aɪ muːvd ˈɪntuː ðeə haʊs, səʊ aɪ
had just lost their mom. I moved into their
kʊd ˈkʌvə θɪŋz ɒn ðə θriː deɪz ə wiːk ðeə dæd
house, so I could cover things on the three
days a week their dad worked as a flight wɜːkt æz ə flaɪt əˈtɛndᵊnt fɔː Qantas.
attendant for Qantas.

I smeared sunblock on their noses and aɪ smɪəd sunblock ɒn ðeə ˈnəʊzɪz ænd
Vegemite on their toast. I read them to sleep Vegemite ɒn ðeə təʊst. aɪ riːd ðɛm tuː sliːp æt
at night, I cleaned the counters. The heavy naɪt, aɪ kliːnd ðə ˈkaʊntəz. ðə ˈhɛvi ˈlɪftɪŋ wɒz lɛft
lifting was left for the truly brave, a man fɔː ðə ˈtruːli breɪv, ə mæn huː ˈɔːɡᵊnaɪzd hɪz
who organized his emotions and answered ɪˈməʊʃᵊnz ænd ˈɑːnsəd ðə ˈhɑːdɪst ˈkwɛsʧənz,
the hardest questions, such that his kids sʌʧ ðæt hɪz kɪdz ænd hɜːz kʊd fiːl ə ˈmɒdɪkəm
and hers could feel a modicum of safety in a ɒv ˈseɪfti ɪn ə ˈpeɪtᵊntli ʌnˈseɪf wɜːld.
patently unsafe world.

Questions like "what is cremation?" And ˈkwɛsʧənz laɪk "wɒt ɪz krɪˈmeɪʃᵊn?" ænd "wɒt
"what happens to us if you die?" ˈhæpᵊnz tuː ʌs ɪf juː daɪ?"
ænd səʊ ɪt ɪz ðæt aɪ stʊd ˈwɪtnəs tuː ði
And so it is that I stood witness to the
ˌʌnˈfəʊtəɡrɑːfəbᵊl, ˌʌnˈmɛʒᵊrəbᵊl ˈbreɪvᵊri ɒv
unphotographable, unmeasurable bravery
sʌm ɡaɪ neɪmd ʤɪm ɪn ˈsɪdni, ɒsˈtreɪliə.
of some guy named Jim in Sydney,
Australia.

ænd ˈəʊvə ðə jɪəz sɪns, aɪ faɪnd aɪ ʤʌst kɑːnt

And over the years since, I find I just can't
stɒp ˈkætəlɒɡɪŋ ðiːz əˈlɪmpɪk əˈʧiːvmənts ɪn
stop cataloging these Olympic achievements
ˈfæmᵊli laɪf. ðə ˈrɪəli bɪɡ θɪŋz ˈɒfᵊn kʌm wɪð ə
in family life. The really big things often
ɡeɪm plæn ænd ə tiːm ɒv ˈɛkspɜːts ænd ɪˈnʌf
come with a game plan and a team of
əˈdrɛnᵊlɪn tuː lɪft ə skuːl bʌs ˈəʊvə jɔː hɛd.
experts and enough adrenaline to lift a
school bus over your head.

But inside every crisis you think you might

bʌt ɪnˈsaɪd ˈɛvri ˈkraɪsɪs juː θɪŋk juː maɪt biː ˈrɛdi
be ready for are 100 dirty surprises that are
fɔːr ɑː 100 ˈdɜːti səˈpraɪzɪz ðæt ɑː nɒt ɪn ðə
not in the playbook. I had stage-3 cancer in
playbook. aɪ hæd steɪʤ-3 ˈkænsər ɪn maɪ 30ɛs,
my 30s, and I can tell you that following the
ænd aɪ kæn tɛl juː ðæt ˈfɒləʊɪŋ ðə chemo ˈʃɛdjuːl
chemo schedule didn't take nearly as much
ˈdɪdᵊnt teɪk ˈnɪəli æz mʌʧ ˈkʌrɪʤ æz ədˈmɪtɪŋ tuː
courage as admitting to my husband that
maɪ ˈhʌzbənd ðæt sɛks fɛlt lɛs ˈsɛksi ˈɑːftə maɪ
sex felt less sexy after my boobs, which were
buːbz, wɪʧ wɜː wʌns ə rɪəl strɒŋ suːt fɔː miː -
once a real strong suit for me -
(ˈlɑːftə)
(Laughter)
Were made weird and uneven by a surgeon's wɜː meɪd wɪəd ænd ʌnˈiːvᵊn baɪ ə ˈsɜːʤᵊnz naɪf.
knife. Here's a surprise. My friend's father, hɪəz ə səˈpraɪz. maɪ frɛndz ˈfɑːðə, ɪn hɪz ˈfaɪnᵊl
in his final days, addled by dementia, deɪz, ˈædld baɪ dɪˈmɛnʃə, ʧeɪst hɜːr əˈraʊnd ðə
chased her around the second floor with a ˈsɛkənd flɔː wɪð ə fɔːk hiː hɪd ɪn hɪz pəˈʤɑːməz.
fork he hid in his pajamas. They tell you ðeɪ tɛl juː ðeə wɪl biː lɒs. ðeɪ dəʊnt tɛl juː juː wɪl
there will be loss. They don't tell you you will biː rɪˈkwaɪəd tuː lʌv jɔː dæd ˈiːvᵊn æz hiːz ˈkʌmɪŋ
be required to love your dad even as he's fɔː juː wɪð ˈsɪlvəweə.
coming for you with silverware. (ˈlɑːftə)

(Laughter)

I've interviewed 228 people for my PBS show aɪv ˈɪntəvjuːd 228 ˈpiːpᵊl fɔː maɪ piː-biː-ɛs ʃəʊ
and my podcast, people with huge careers, ænd maɪ ˈpɒdkɑːst, ˈpiːpᵊl wɪð hjuːʤ kəˈrɪəz,
Grammys and Pulitzers NBA ˈɡræmiz
and ænd ˈpʊlɪtsəz ænd ɛn-biː-eɪ

championships. And I listened to their ˈʧæmpiənʃɪps. ænd aɪ ˈlɪsᵊnd tuː ðeə ˈstɔːriz
ænd aɪm ˈdjuːli ɪmˈprɛst.
stories and I'm duly impressed.

bʌt aɪl tɛl juː ðə wʌnz ðeɪ nəʊ ðə bɛst.

But I'll tell you the ones they know the best.
ðə wʌnz ðeɪ kɑːnt tɛl wɪˈðaʊt ˈʧəʊkɪŋ ʌp.
The ones they can't tell without choking up.
ðə ˈməʊmənt wɛn ˈbraɪən ˈstiːvᵊnsᵊnz
The moment when Bryan Stevenson's
ˈɡrænmʌðə, ɔː stiːv Kerr's ˈfɑːðə, ɔː səˈmænθə
grandmother, or Steve Kerr's father, or
ˈpaʊəz ˈstɛpˌfɑːðə, ɔː Cecile ˈrɪʧədz mɒm, wɒz
Samantha Power's stepfather, or Cecile
raɪt ðeə wɪð ðə raɪt wɜːdz ɔː ðə raɪt ˈsaɪləns æt
Richards’ mom, was right there with the
ðə raɪt ˈməʊmənt.
right words or the right silence at the right
moment.

ðɪs ˈbreɪvᵊri aɪm ˈtɔːkɪŋ əˈbaʊt maɪt ˈiːvᵊn biː

This bravery I'm talking about might even
ˈbɛtər ˌʌndəˈstʊd ɪf juː lʊk æt ðə ˈsmɔːlə
be better understood if you look at the
ˈməʊmənts ɒv ˈɪnʤᵊri ɪn ˈfæmᵊli laɪf wɛn ðeəz
smaller moments of injury in family life
nɒt ˈrɪəli ən ˈɑːnsə, ɔːr ɪt maɪt biː jɔː fɔːlt, ɔːr ɪt
when there's not really an answer, or it
maɪt rɪˈmaɪnd juː ɒv ˈsʌmθɪŋ juːd ˈrɑːðə fəˈɡɛt.
might be your fault, or it might remind you
of something you'd rather forget.

Or because people are so suggestible and

ɔː bɪˈkɒz ˈpiːpᵊl ɑː səʊ səˈʤɛstəbᵊl ænd ðə rɒŋ
the wrong tone or expression or phrasing
təʊn ɔːr ɪkˈsprɛʃᵊn ɔː ˈfreɪzɪŋ maɪt ˈsʌmhaʊ meɪk
might somehow make things worse. θɪŋz wɜːs.
Say your kid was dropped from a group text. seɪ jɔː kɪd wɒz drɒpt frɒm ə ɡruːp tɛkst.
They were in it, they mattered, they ðeɪ wɜːr ɪn ɪt, ðeɪ ˈmætəd, ðeɪ bɪˈlɒŋd, ænd ðɛn,
belonged, and then, poof. pʊf.

Or your husband blew the big deal at work, ɔː jɔː ˈhʌzbənd bluː ðə bɪɡ diːl æt wɜːk, ɔː jɔː
or your mom won't wear the diapers that mɒm wəʊnt weə ðə ˈdaɪəpəz ðæt wʊd ˈrɪəli hɛlp
would really help her get through mahjong hɜː ɡɛt θruː mahjong ɒn ˈwɛnzdeɪz.
on Wednesdays. (ˈlɑːftə)
(Laughter)

And how should we calibrate the exquisite ænd haʊ ʃʊd wiː ˈkælɪbreɪt ði ˈɛkskwɪzɪt ˈbreɪvᵊri
bravery to respond productively when tuː rɪˈspɒnd prəˈdʌktɪvli wɛn ˈsʌmwʌn ɪn ˈaʊə
someone in our family looks at us and says, ˈfæmᵊli lʊks æt ʌs ænd sɛz,

"Do I know you?" "duː aɪ nəʊ juː?"

"aɪ weɪ maɪˈsɛlf bɪˈfɔːr ænd ˈɑːftər ˈɛvri miːl,"

"I weigh myself before and after every meal,"

"aɪ hɪə ˈvɔɪsɪz," "aɪ stiːl,"

"I hear voices," "I steal,"

"aɪm ˈjuːzɪŋ əˈɡɛn,"

"I'm using again,"

"hiː reɪpt miː," "ʃiː sɛz aɪ reɪpt hɜː,"

"He raped me," "She says I raped her,"

"aɪ kʌt maɪˈsɛlf,"

"I cut myself,"

"aɪ bɔːt ə ɡʌn,"

"I bought a gun,"

"aɪ stɒpt ˈteɪkɪŋ ðə ˌmɛdɪˈkeɪʃᵊn,"

"I stopped taking the medication,"

"aɪ kɑːnt stɒp ˈmeɪkɪŋ ˈɒnˌlaɪn bɛts."

"I can't stop making online bets."

"ˈsʌmtaɪmz aɪ ˈwʌndər ɪf mɔː laɪf ɪz ˈrɪəli wɜːθ ɔːl

"Sometimes I wonder if more life is really
ðɪs ˈɛfət."
worth all this effort."

Bravery is the great guts to move closer to ˈbreɪvᵊri ɪz ðə ɡreɪt ɡʌts tuː muːv ˈkləʊzə tuː ðə
the wound, as composed as a war nurse wuːnd, æz kəmˈpəʊzd æz ə wɔː nɜːs ˈhəʊldɪŋ aɪ
holding eye contact and saying these seven ˈkɒntækt ænd ˈseɪɪŋ ðiːz ˈsɛvᵊn wɜːdz:
words:
tɛl miː mɔː.
Tell me more.
wɒt ɛls?
What else?
ɡəʊ ɒn.
Go on.
ðæts haʊ ðə breɪv ʃaɪn, ðæts ɔːl ðeɪ duː. ðeɪ seɪ,

That's how the brave shine, that's all they "tɛl miː mɔː.
do. They say, "Tell me more.
wɒt ɛls?

What else?
ɡəʊ ɒn."

Go on."

Even if they're scared of what might happen

ˈiːvᵊn ɪf ðeə skeəd ɒv wɒt maɪt ˈhæpᵊn nɛkst,
next, even if they have no training or
ˈiːvᵊn ɪf ðeɪ hæv nəʊ ˈtreɪnɪŋ ɔːr ɪkˈspɪəriəns tuː
experience to prepare them for this
prɪˈpeə ðɛm fɔː ðɪs ˈməʊmənt.
moment.

ˈiːvᵊn ɪf ɪts leɪt ænd ðeɪ hæv ən ˈɜːli flaɪt.

Even if it's late and they have an early flight.
hɪəz tuː θɪŋz ðə breɪv dəʊnt duː. ðeɪ dəʊnt teɪk
Here's two things the brave don't do. They
ˈəʊvər ænd bɪˈkʌm ðə ˈhɪərəʊ laɪk ɪts ə ˈbætᵊl
don't take over and become the hero like it's
ænd ðə muːvz ɑː səʊ ˈɒbviəs.
a battle and the moves are so obvious.

juː ʤʌst pɪk ʌp ə ˈwɛpən wɪð jɔː rɪpt pecs ænd

You just pick up a weapon with your ripped
ropey veɪnz ænd stɑːt ˈsleɪɪŋ. ɪn ˈfæmᵊliz,
pecs and ropey veins and start slaying. In
ˈbreɪvᵊri ɪz ˈməʊstli ʤʌst ˈsɪtɪŋ ðeə.
families, bravery is mostly just sitting there.
wɪð ə ˈpɒsʧə ðæt kəˈmjuːnɪkeɪts "aɪ kæn hɪər
With a posture that communicates "I can
ˈɛniθɪŋ juː wɒnt tuː tɛl miː."
hear anything you want to tell me."

ænd ə naɪs wɔːm feɪs ɒv lʌv ðæt sɛz, "ðɪs ɪz səʊ

And a nice warm face of love that says, "This
hɑːd, bʌt juː wɪl ˈfɪɡər ɪt aʊt." ˈpɜːsᵊnᵊli, aɪ θɔːt
is so hard, but you will figure it out."
lʌv mɛnt ˈækʃᵊn. aɪ hæd nəʊ aɪˈdɪə ɪt kʊd biː səʊ
Personally, I thought love meant action. I stɪl. wɛn θɪŋz ɡɛt ˈheəri fɔː wʌn ɒv maɪ ˈpiːpᵊl,
had no idea it could be so still. When things ˈɛvriθɪŋ ɪn miː wɒnts tuː ɡræb ə ˈklɪpbɔːd, meɪk
get hairy for one of my people, everything in ə təˈduː lɪst, ænd stɑːt ˈkæləndərɪŋ
me wants to grab a clipboard, make a to-do əˈpɔɪntmənts.
list, and start calendaring appointments.

Because where there's love, there's bɪˈkɒz weə ðeəz lʌv, ðeəz əˈtæʧmənt. ænd aɪ
attachment. And I don't care what the gurus dəʊnt keə wɒt ðə ˈɡʊruːz seɪ, wɒts ˈhæpᵊnɪŋ tuː
say, what's happening to them is also ðɛm ɪz ˈɔːlsəʊ ˈhæpᵊnɪŋ, æt liːst æt sʌm ˈlɛvᵊl,
happening, at least at some level, to us. tuː ʌs.

And all that can accidentally put us center ænd ɔːl ðæt kæn ˌæksɪˈdɛntəli pʊt ʌs ˈsɛntə
stage. No longer the coach or the minister, steɪʤ. nəʊ ˈlɒŋɡə ðə kəʊʧ ɔː ðə ˈmɪnɪstə,

but rather one of the afflicted. But these bʌt ˈrɑːðə wʌn ɒv ði əˈflɪktɪd. bʌt ðiːz ˈɡrɪti
gritty endurance types I've been admiring ɪnˈdjʊərᵊns taɪps aɪv biːn ədˈmaɪərɪŋ hæv nəʊ
have no self and no needs and no agenda. sɛlf ænd nəʊ niːdz ænd nəʊ əˈʤɛndə.

Or at least they know how to override all

ɔːr æt liːst ðeɪ nəʊ haʊ tuː ˌəʊvəˈraɪd ɔːl ðæt fɔː
that for the main character who is not us.
ðə meɪn ˈkærəktə huː ɪz nɒt ʌs.
The second thing the brave don't do?
ðə ˈsɛkənd θɪŋ ðə breɪv dəʊnt duː?

Leave.
liːv.

Or hide inside work or hobbies or some

ɔː haɪd ɪnˈsaɪd wɜːk ɔː ˈhɒbiz ɔː sʌm ˈʌðə ˈsəʊʃᵊli
other socially acceptable busyness.
əkˈsɛptəbᵊl ˈbɪzɪnəs.

In my worst moments, when sitting on my

ɪn maɪ wɜːst ˈməʊmənts, wɛn ˈsɪtɪŋ ɒn maɪ
hands is just unbearable, I have dreamed of
hændz ɪz ʤʌst ʌnˈbeərəbᵊl, aɪ hæv driːmd ɒv
going to get an MFA in Paris.
ˈɡəʊɪŋ tuː ɡɛt ən ɛm-ɛf-eɪ ɪn ˈpærɪs.
(Laughter)
(ˈlɑːftə)

Because if I can't help, why do I have to

bɪˈkɒz ɪf aɪ kɑːnt hɛlp, waɪ duː aɪ hæv tuː wɒʧ? ɪt
watch? It would be nice to leave and start
wʊd biː naɪs tuː liːv ænd stɑːt əˈɡɛn. ˈhɑːdli
again. Hardly anyone who's been in a long
ˈɛniwʌn huːz biːn ɪn ə lɒŋ ˈmærɪʤ ˈhæzᵊnt æt
marriage hasn't at least wondered how it is
liːst ˈwʌndəd haʊ ɪt ɪz ðæt ði ˈɒbʤɪkt ɒv ðeə
that the object of their desire has become so
dɪˈzaɪə hæz bɪˈkʌm səʊ burpy ænd farty.
burpy and farty. (ˈlɑːftə)
(Laughter)
So bingo-armed and turkey-necked. səʊ ˈbɪŋɡəʊ-ɑːmd ænd ˈtɜːki-nɛkt. ˈsʌmtaɪmz aɪ
Sometimes I see myself naked. Stretch siː maɪˈsɛlf ˈneɪkɪd. strɛʧ mɑːks frɒm
marks from pregnancies, scars from cancer ˈprɛɡnənsiz, skɑːz frɒm ˈkænsə ˈsɜːʤᵊriz, ˈʌðə
surgeries, other things that I don't feel you θɪŋz ðæt aɪ dəʊnt fiːl juː niːd tuː biː ˈvɪʒuᵊlaɪzɪŋ
need to be visualizing right about now. raɪt əˈbaʊt naʊ.
(Laughter) (ˈlɑːftə)

And I think it's a miracle that man stays ænd aɪ θɪŋk ɪts ə ˈmɪrəkᵊl ðæt mæn steɪz wɪð
with me. But, you know, he's not untouched miː. bʌt, juː nəʊ, hiːz nɒt ʌnˈtʌʧt baɪ taɪm ˈaɪðə.
by time either. (ˈlɑːftə)

(Laughter)
ænd ðæts ʤʌst ðə ˈfɪzɪkᵊl. aɪ miːn, huː hɪə

And that's just the physical. I mean, who ˈhæzᵊnt ˈwɒntɪd tuː biː wɪð ˈsʌmwʌn huː ˈhæzᵊnt
here hasn't wanted to be with someone who siːn ʌs ˈiːtɪŋ ɒn ðə ˈtɔɪlət ɔː ˈbɪʧɪŋ æt ðə
Comcast ɡaɪ?
hasn't seen us eating on the toilet or
(ˈlɑːftə)
bitching at the Comcast guy?
(Laughter)

Leaving behind our own humiliating

ˈliːvɪŋ bɪˈhaɪnd ˈaʊər əʊn hjuːˈmɪlieɪtɪŋ ˈhɪstᵊri,
history, maybe with the nice person we met
ˈmeɪbi wɪð ðə naɪs ˈpɜːsᵊn wiː mɛt æt ɑːt skuːl ɪn
at art school in Paris.
ˈpærɪs.
(Laughter)
(ˈlɑːftə)

It's an option. People take it. The brave hang

ɪts ən ˈɒpʃᵊn. ˈpiːpᵊl teɪk ɪt. ðə breɪv hæŋ
around. They are available and ready to
əˈraʊnd. ðeɪ ɑːr əˈveɪləbᵊl ænd ˈrɛdi tuː beə
bear witness. The final act of bravery was
ˈwɪtnəs. ðə ˈfaɪnᵊl ækt ɒv ˈbreɪvᵊri wɒz meɪd
made clear for me during a conversation
klɪə fɔː miː ˈdjʊərɪŋ ə ˌkɒnvəˈseɪʃᵊn wɪð maɪ
with my friend Liz while she was dying at
frɛnd lɪz waɪl ʃiː wɒz ˈdaɪɪŋ æt 46. ʃiː sɛd ʃiː hæd
46. She said she had this weird, long, totally
ðɪs wɪəd, lɒŋ, ˈtəʊtᵊli kənˈvɪnsɪŋ driːm weər ɔːl
convincing dream where all the parents
ðə ˈpeərᵊnts huː, æz ʃiː pʊt ɪt, hæd tuː liːv ˈɜːli,
who, as she put it, had to leave early, were
wɜː ˈɡæðəd.
gathered.

And there she was, one of thousands of

ænd ðeə ʃiː wɒz, wʌn ɒv ˈθaʊzᵊndz ɒv mɒmz
moms and dads, and they were on folding ænd dædz, ænd ðeɪ wɜːr ɒn ˈfəʊldɪŋ ʧeəz,
chairs, looking down at the world below ˈlʊkɪŋ daʊn æt ðə wɜːld bɪˈləʊ θruː ə θɪk ɡlɑːs
through a thick glass floor. flɔː.

And in this imaginary space her ænd ɪn ðɪs ɪˈmæʤɪnᵊri speɪs hɜː ˌsʌbˈkɒnʃəs
subconscious created, there was one rule. kriˈeɪtɪd, ðeə wɒz wʌn ruːl. juː kʊd wɒʧ jɔː ʧaɪldz
You could watch your child's life unfold, but laɪf ʌnˈfəʊld, bʌt juː kʊd ˈəʊnli ˌɪntəˈviːn wʌns.
you could only intervene once.

In Liz's dream, a perfect dream, she never

had to intervene. She had given them ɪn ˈlɪzɪz driːm, ə ˈpɜːfɛkt driːm, ʃiː ˈnɛvə hæd tuː
enough while she was here. The final act ˌɪntəˈviːn. ʃiː hæd ˈɡɪvᵊn ðɛm ɪˈnʌf waɪl ʃiː wɒz
then of the truly brave is leaning back and hɪə. ðə ˈfaɪnᵊl ækt ðɛn ɒv ðə ˈtruːli breɪv ɪz ˈliːnɪŋ
letting them go. bæk ænd ˈlɛtɪŋ ðɛm ɡəʊ.

The reward for all this bravery? ðə rɪˈwɔːd fɔːr ɔːl ðɪs ˈbreɪvᵊri?
nɒt ɡəʊld ˈmɛdᵊlz, nɒt ˈhɪərəʊ ʃɒts fɔː Strava, nɒt
Not gold medals, not hero shots for Strava,
ˈrɪŋɪŋ ðə bɛl æt ðə njuː jɔːk stɒk ɪksˈʧeɪnʤ, ɔːr
not ringing the bell at the New York Stock
ˈəʊnɪŋ ðə ˈdɪnə ˈpɑːti wɪð ˈbɜːnɪŋ mæn ˈstɔːriz,
Exchange, or owning the dinner party with
aɪ θɪŋk juː nəʊ huː juː ɑː.
Burning Man stories, I think you know who
(ˈlɑːftə)
you are.
(Laughter)

Maybe not even thanks. The reward is a full

ˈmeɪbi nɒt ˈiːvᵊn θæŋks. ðə rɪˈwɔːd ɪz ə fʊl
human experience, complete with all the
ˈhjuːmən ɪkˈspɪəriəns, kəmˈpliːt wɪð ɔːl ði
emotions at maximum dosage, where we
ɪˈməʊʃᵊnz æt ˈmæksɪməm ˈdəʊsɪʤ, weə wiː
have been put to great use and found an
hæv biːn pʊt tuː ɡreɪt juːz ænd faʊnd ən
other-centric love that is complete in its
ˈʌðə-ˈsɛntrɪk lʌv ðæt ɪz kəmˈpliːt ɪn ɪts ɪkˈsprɛʃᵊn
expression and its transmission.
ænd ɪts trænzˈmɪʃᵊn.

The reward is to end up soft and humble,

ðə rɪˈwɔːd ɪz tuː ɛnd ʌp sɒft ænd ˈhʌmbᵊl, ˈɛmpti
empty and in awe, knowing that of all the
ænd ɪn ɔː, ˈnəʊɪŋ ðæt ɒv ɔːl ðə mæɡˈnɪfɪsns wiː
magnificence we have beheld from cradle to
hæv bɪˈhɛld frɒm ˈkreɪdᵊl tuː ɡreɪv, ðə məʊst
grave, the most eye-popping was
aɪ-ˈpɒpɪŋ wɒz ˌɪntəˈpɜːsᵊnᵊl. səʊ hɪəz tuː
interpersonal. So here's to anyone who
ˈɛniwʌn huː ˈnəʊtɪsɪz ænd riːdz bɪˈtwiːn ðə laɪnz,
notices and reads between the lines, who
huː ɑːsks ðə raɪt ˈkwɛsʧənz, bʌt nɒt tuː ˈmɛni, huː
asks the right questions, but not too many, teɪks nəʊts æt ðə ˈdɒktəz ˈɒfɪs ænd waɪps bʌts,
who takes notes at the doctor's office and jʌŋ ænd əʊld, huː ˈlɪsᵊnz, həʊldz ænd steɪz.
wipes butts, young and old, who listens,
holds and stays.

We, who, untrained and always a little wiː, huː, ʌnˈtreɪnd ænd ˈɔːlweɪz ə ˈlɪtᵊl ɒf-ɡɑːd,
off-guard, still dare to do love. stɪl deə tuː duː lʌv.

To be love. That's brave. tuː biː lʌv. ðæts breɪv.

Thank you. θæŋk juː.

(Cheers and applause) (ʧɪəz ænd əˈplɔːz)