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Sometimes, being an Executive Coach for RSD is a lot
AFFILIATES like being a doctor in the ER.
CONTACT
ABOUT US Ever since I started doing this, I've seen guys come
E-COURSE ARCHIVE to the programs in a PANIC about their inability to
open groups consistently, paralyzing inner game issues,
terrible fashion sense, and so on and so forth. The
equivalent of the gunshot wounds, car accidents and
strokes that show up in the emergency room.

Along the way, RSD has earned a reputation as a company

that solves problems. We like the rep, too... and we're
proud that it's been a long, long time since we've
encountered a problem with a guy's game that we couldn't
fix.

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 And fix FAST.

Usually, taking a live RSD program can fix even the most
hard-core problems - by pumping up confidence, setting up
new belief systems, or straight smacking you up and
turning you around 180 degrees, if you're headed in
the wrong direction.

Sometimes, however, we need to go right to the heart of

the problem, and start rearranging things from the
ground up.

Often, the problems are just plain fundamental.

It's simple to work with clients who are saavy about
social interaction. But if they're NOT... it's like
starting a race 10 feet behind the starting line.

You gotta play a very fast game of "catch up".

So, like a doctor quickly checking vital signs, I

learned to do a *rapid* check-up on the basics of any
"patient". No matter how drastic the problem appears,
the *solution* to the problem is usually something
EXTREMELY SIMPLE.

The basics are the first things to look at.

I've got my own checklist in my head now, because I've

done this for so long. But when I started out, before
I had a lot of experience with different kinds of
flaws in guys' game, I had to scramble to figure out
what was going on. This checklist you now hold in your
hands was created a long time ago... when I was still
being astonished at how FUNDAMENTAL most solutions
were to bad game.

I found this checklist recently, while going through

some files. Actually, these were just some notes I
scribbled down during a post-workshop debrief at 6AM
in London... me and the guys were wide awake, and I
had a flight to catch at 8, so we just stayed up until
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 had a flight to catch at 8, so we just stayed up until
dawn talking game. When I found it, I knew exactly what
it was.

This list served me very well in my early days of

coaching.

Nothing whatsoever has changed about the fundamentals,

nor will they ever change. So, this list should serve
YOU well, too. It's the result of some hard-core
studying and experimentation... and also the input
from some of the best in the game. Enjoy.

CHECKLIST POINT #1: VOICE TONALITY/DELIVERY

Aside from body language, this is probably the biggest

thing I see missing from most guys' game. The fact of
the matter is, YOU CAN'T BUILD ATTRACTION
IF THEY CAN'T HEAR YOU!!

You can't mumble and fumble your opener and expect to

get a good response. You need to project your voice
from the diaphragm.

Five years of karaoke training have made this second

nature to me, but for a lot of guys, it feels unnatural.

Furthermore, it's sometimes necessary to raise the

pitch of your voice in order to cut through the loud
music playing at most clubs. Don't be concerned about
sounding like a Chipmunks Christmas album, it's not
noticeable amidst the thumping bass.

Your delivery is important, too. Ever heard a news anchor

flub a syllable on TV? It's minor, but because
it's on TV, it seems like a glaring error. It's the
same in pickup... you're being closely scrutinized, so
you need to eliminate all "ummms" and "ahhs" from your
vocabulary. SMOOTH.

Finally, start paying attention to the rhythm of your

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 communication. Rhythm, expression and sexuality are
all intertwined, and it's important to deliver a smooth
flow, modulating things dynamically.

CHECKLIST POINT #2: SMOOTHENING OUT/TOO JITTERY

So often, I see guys roll up to a set and deliver their

opener, then start making these weird, jerky head
movements. Like, they're having a damn seizure. The
girls are like, WTF??

Or sometimes, it's weird, spastic hand gestures. Or

maybe they're just shifting from foot to foot
incessantly. In any case, it's not long before the
ladies start giving each other that "let's get the hell
out of here" eye code. Buh-bye!

The point is, these things are subcommunicating a lack

of confidence.

In other words, while your words might be those of a

suave-ass James Bond type, the subtext is that of Steve
Urkel.

Just take a deep breath, and relax. This ain't brain

surgery, Bucko.

CHECKLIST POINT #3: BE MORE PLAYFUL

Another key one. This is related to #2, in the sense

that the perp is taking things way too seriously.

The difference is, in this case, the guy is acting

like he's an appointee for the Supreme Court being
interrogated by the Senate Judiciary Comittee. All
business. Stone-faced. Giving curt, matter of fact
responses to everything the chick says.

OK, what you gotta understand is that when the ladies

hit the club, they are there to HAVE FUN. Not to engage
in a job interview.
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 Loosen up, bro. Have a little fun yourself. Don't be
afraid to act a little foolish. Joke around.

BE PLAYFUL.

CHECKLIST POINT #4: FOCUS ALL MENTAL ENERGY

What I mean by this is, you've gotta silence the

chatter in your head when you approach.

The only thing you should be thinking about is what's

unfolding as you go in. Not what MIGHT happen or what
COULD happen.

Consider this: a social interaction is a living,

breathing, dynamic thing during the course of which
an infinite number of things can occur.

Given that, doesn't it make sense that you'd need as

much "processor speed" as humanly possible in order to
perceive what's happening, decide what the proper
course of action is, and respond instantly?

Sure it does.

Cycling through failure scenarios in your head isn't

gonna do anything but rob you of that precious
brainpower.

Worse, that internal pollution is gonna taint the

broadcast: you will end up inadvertently giving off an
"insecure" vibe.

Don't do it!

CHECKLIST POINT #5: FRAME CONTROL

Another thing that screws most people up at a

fundamental level is a lack of frame control.

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 Controlling the frame means controlling the context and
the direction of the conversation. Being commanding.

Too many guys will hear an unfavorable comment and just

deflate and give up. Or sometimes, the girls will say
something negative about them and they fall into it by
addressing it.

The next thing you know, the discussion is out of their

control and they're faced with the distasteful choice of
either digging themselves out of the hole, or giving up
and ejecting.

At this point, most guys do the latter. Frankly, so

would I.

Best to prevent things from getting to that point in

the first place. That means cutting off threads that
work against you.

That means talking over people who are saying

things that don't lead the conversation in
the ways you want it to go.

Sometimes, it means flagrantly changing the subject

with a ridiculous non-sequiter. Whatever works.

Frame control can be a difficult thing to learn, but I

can't stress this enough:

It's absolutely necessary.

CHECKLIST POINT #6: MOVE THINGS FORWARD

Ever see that movie "Glengarry Glen Ross"? The motto of

the salesmen in the movie is "ABC: Always Be Closing".
This is the motto of the successful pick-up artist as
well.

Don't get me wrong here. I don't mean you should go up

to women and try to get them back to your place in the
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 to women and try to get them back to your place in the
shortest time possible. Don't jump the gun... you gotta
take things one step at a time. This isn't a race.

By the same token, however, I get frustrated when I see

guys talking to these girls for hours on end without
doing anything to escalate things toward a situation
where things get physical.

Like, it's three hours in and they haven't even touched

her on the arm.

I think a big reason guys do this is because they're

afraid to get blown out. Like, they think, "Ok, this
is going great, she's laughing at my jokes and we're
vibing really well, I better not screw it up by trying
to escalate."

News flash, man... if they're sticking around, it's

highly likely that they know what's going on, and they
EXPECT you to escalate.

These girls have reasonable expectations that you're

gonna step up at some point and take things to the next
level. Don't let them down. It's just tacky.

Remember, once a girl's attracted to you, there's a

WINDOW of time in which you can "strike" so to speak.
Once that window's closed, you're done, bro.

Always have a direction, and always be moving the set

forward in that direction.

CHECKLIST POINT #7: FACIAL EXPRESSIONS

This one kinda ties in with #3. It's about being

expressive.

At RSD, we define game as: the expression of your

inner state, conveyed by the rhythms you use to direct
the energy of the social interaction.

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 Some of these guys I see in the field are talking to
the girls, and they look like a marble bust of George
Washington or something... maybe that "strong silent
type" bit works in cerrtain cases, but we're going for
consistency, folks.

When I'm in set, I'm mugging like Jim frickin Carrey.

Sometimes I'll have this stupid smirk on my face, other
times I'll look at them like I'm judging them, other
times I'll scrunch up my nose and wink at them.

It all depends on the energy I'm getting from the girl.

I calibrate and react accordingly. There are XXX
muscles in your face (I don't know, it's a really big
number), and these let you express an almost infinite
range of emotions.

Try it now. Go to the mirror and make as many faces as

you possibly can. Go ahead... nobody's looking. And if
they are, at least you'll entertain them.

OK, that's enough. You're scaring me.

I do this frequently as an exercise to keep those

expressions queued up and ready to go.

Remember: 90 percent of communication is non-verbal,

and a HUGE portion of that 90 percent comes from the
expression on your face.

Trust me on this... it's gotten me laid more times than

I can accurately recall.

CHECKLIST POINT #8: STANDING TOO FAR AWAY

Similar to #6. Now, obviously, you don't want to spook

the girl by rolling up and getting two inches from her
face right off the bat.

That's just asking for rejection, it's creepy.

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 That's just asking for rejection, it's creepy.

You wanna approach with non- threatening body language.

Maybe even a little "active disinterest". To show

you're not one of the dozens of needy losers that
hit on her every night.

BUT!

At some point, you have to get closer. It's just a fact.

Okay? Nothing is gonna happen if you stay at arm's
length... except get your butt thrown into the dreaded
"friend zone".

You gotta "cut in".

I'll usually get all up in their space as soon as I

know I've hooked them. That is, as soon as I know
they've stopped thinking, "Why is this guy talking to
me," and started thinking, "I hope this guy doesn't
stop talking to me."

This doesn't mean I have to STAY there. I'll back off

just as abruptly as I went in. It all goes back to
calibration. Give-and-take.

The point is, I get in there. ASAP. You should too.

CHECKLIST POINT #9: PLAYING A CHARACTER

This is a funny one. You see this usually when a guy

has a lot of rehearsed lines and so forth under his
belt, although that's not exclusively the case.

What happens is the guy is saying things that SHOULD

sound smooth and cool... but it sounds like he's
reading from a script.

Like, it's a little TOO cool. Like an actor in an

after-school special about cheesy "players". Not pretty.

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 It's like, when you shoot a home video and you put on
some weird "narrator" voice... "And HEEEERE'S the
KITCHEN!!!" It's not genuine.

You do it because you know this might potentially be

viewed by thousands of people, and it's a defense
mechanism against being perceived in certain ways.

So when guys do this in field, it's the same thing. A

defense mechanism. They put out the character to
keep their "real" self safe from rejection.

Ironically, this tends to CAUSE rejection. Life sucks,

huh?

Believe it or not, most people (and especially women)

have a keen sense of when someone's faking sincerity.
Unless you're an acclaimed Shakesperean actor, you're
better off being genuine.

So that's the checklist.

Now, I'm not suggesting you write this thing down and
carry it around with you. Nor is it meant to be
a comprehensive cure-all.

These are just some of the most common mistakes we see

guys make in the field, so take a quick inventory and
see if you're guilty of any of them.

For guys with a lot of experience, it may seem

simplistic... but no one will doubt that the basics
are what get violated the most.

Use this checklist on yourself, until it becomes

second nature. And use it when you're doing triage on
someone else's sick game.

You'll be surprised how often the culprit behind a

problem is... the simplest thing in the world.
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 problem is... the simplest thing in the world.

We've got new dates up on the schedule for our

live, in-field, Personalized Workshops and Bootcamps.
During the live RSD programs, we'll provide MOUNTAINS
of solid information and tactics to improve your game.
Then you'll venture out into the field with the RSD
Executive Coaches, who will provide extremely detailed
feedback about your strengths and weaknesses, helping
you eradicate all sticking points.

The checklist above is just the tip of the iceberg.

Over the course of the three day program, we'll conduct
an EXHAUSTIVE analysis of your game until no stone has
been left unturned, so to speak.

Check out our upcoming schedule here:

http://www.realsocialdynamics.com/schedule.asp

For an even more personalized experience, try one of

our Personalized Bootcamps. We'll push you beyond what
you thought you were capable of.

Then you'll be pushed some more!

And the entire time, the RSD executive coaches will be

there, not only to provide you with intensely detailed
feedback and suggestions, but also to demonstrate what
is REALLY possible.

With this information, you'll score more than you ever

thought possible (while expending a fraction of the
effort!).

To learn more about RSD Personalized Bootcamps, visit:

http://www.realsocialdynamics.com/bootcamps.asp

This is an investment that pays dividends for a LIFETIME.

Take it easy, player... see you next time.

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 Sincerely,

Jeffy, Executive Coach

REAL SOCIAL DYNAMICS

PS...And don't forget: this newsletter also serves as a

forum for subscriber questions and success stories.
Email them to me at jlaix@realsocialdynamics.com and
I'll answer them personally. I'll provide the solution
to any challenge you can possibly put to me. Remember:
even if an obstacle seems "big" to you, our team has
probably faced it hundreds of times, so we can solve it
in a SNAP.

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You are solely responsible for the use of the
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Social Dynamics Inc. and all members and
affiliates harmless in any event or claim. If
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link at the end of this e-letter to stop
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