WHAT IS CONFLICT MANAGEMENT?

- Conflict management is the practice of being able to identify and handle conflicts
sensibly, fairly, and efficiently. It is the process of dealing with (perceived)
incompatibilities or disagreements arising from, for example, diverging opinions,
objectives, and needs.
- ‍Conflict is not a strange thing for people. Human beings experience it in their
day-to-day lives – with their friends, families, and more so their professional
lives. In the workplace, conflict causes a massive degree of frustration, pain,
discomfort, sadness, as well as anger. It is a normal life aspect. In the world of
today, organizations hire employees from diverse geographical locations with
dissimilar cultural and intellectual backgrounds, as well as various viewpoints.
In a working environment where people have disparate outlooks toward the
same problems, disagreements are bound to happen.
- Since conflicts in a business are a natural part of the workplace, it is important
that there are people who understand conflicts and know how to resolve them.
This is important in today's market more than ever. Everyone is striving to show
how valuable they are to the company they work for and at times, this can lead to
disputes with other members of the team.

WHAT ARE THE COMMON CONFLICT MANAGEMENT STYLES?

‍1. Collaborating:
This conflict management style produces the best long-term results, but it is frequently
the most difficult and time-consuming to achieve. The needs and desires of each party
are considered, and a win-win solution is found so that everyone is satisfied.
This frequently entails all parties sitting down together, discussing the conflict, and
negotiating a solution together. The collaborating conflict management style is used
when it is critical to maintain all parties' relationships or when the solution itself will have
a significant impact.
‍2. Competing:
The competing conflict management style rejects compromise and does not give in to
the opinions or desires of others. One party is adamant about how they believe a
situation should be handled and will not back down until they get their way.
‍
This can be in situations where morals require a specific course of action, when there
isn't time to try a different solution, or when an unpopular decision must be made. It can
quickly resolve disputes, but it has a high risk of lowering morale and productivity.
‍
3. Avoiding:
This conflict management style seeks to reduce conflict by ignoring it, removing the
conflicting parties, or evading it in some way. Team members who are in disagreement
can be removed from the project, deadlines pushed, or people reassigned to other
departments.
‍
If a cool-down period would be beneficial or if you need more time to consider your
stance on the conflict itself, this can be an effective conflict resolution style. However,
avoidance should not be used in place of proper conflict resolution; putting off conflict
indefinitely can and will lead to more (and larger) conflicts down the road.
‍
‍4. Accommodating:
The accommodating conflict management style is all about putting the needs of the
other party ahead of one's own. You let them 'win' and have their way. Accommodation
is used when you don't care as much about the issue as the other person, if prolonging
the conflict isn't worth your time, or if you believe you're wrong.
‍
This option is about keeping the peace, not putting in more effort than is necessary, and
knowing when to pick your battles. While it may appear to be a weak option,
accommodation can be the best way to resolve a minor conflict and move on to more
important issues. This style is highly cooperative on the resolver's part, but it can lead to
resentment.
‍5. Compromising:
This conflict management style seeks a middle ground by asking both parties to give up
some aspects of their desires in order to reach an agreement. This style is sometimes
referred to as "lose-lose," because both parties will have to give up a few things in order
to reach an agreement on the larger issue.
‍
When there is a time constraint or when a solution simply needs to happen rather than
be perfect, this is used. Compromise can breed resentment, especially when used
excessively as a conflict resolution tactic, so use it sparingly.
‍

TYPES OF WORKPLACE CONFLICT

Generally, workplace conflicts fall into two categories:

 Personality conflict or disagreements between individuals. These clashes

are driven and perpetuated by emotions such as anger, stress and frustration.
 Substantive conflict is tangible and task-related, like the decisions leaders
make, the performance of a team member, or your company's direction.
If unaddressed, both can spiral into wider conflict between teams, departments or
businesses.

WHAT CAUSES CONFLICT AT WORK?

Some of the most common causes of workplace conflict are:

 Unclear responsibilities. Some team members may feel they do more work
than others, or resent those who seem to have fewer responsibilities. Blame
and frustration can build due to duplicated work or unfinished tasks.
 Competition for resources. Time, money, materials, equipment, and
skillsets are finite resources. Competition for them can lead to conflict.
 Different interests. People may focus on personal or departmental goals
over organizational ones. Or be held up and frustrated by others who they rely
on to do their jobs effectively.

5 CONFLICT RESOLUTION SKILLS

When you find yourself in a conflict situation, these five skills will help you to resolve
disagreements quickly and effectively.

1. Raise the Issue Early

Keeping quiet only lets resentment fester. Equally, speaking with other people first can
fuel rumor and misunderstanding. So, whether you're battling over the thermostat or feel
that you're being micromanaged, be direct and talk with the other party.

However, if you're afraid of making that approach, or worry that it may make the
problem worse, speak with your manager first, or your HR department if the other party
is your manager.

Either way, be assertive (not aggressive) and speak openly. This will encourage others
to do the same – and you can get to the root cause of a problem before it escalates.
2. Manage Your Emotions

Choose your timing when you talk to someone about the conflict. If you're angry, you
may say something you'll regret and inflame the situation. Be careful to avoid playing
the blame game .
So stay calm, collect yourself, and ask, "What is it I want to achieve here?", "What are
the issues I'm having?" and "What is it that I would like to see?"

3. Show Empathy

When you talk to someone about a conflict, it's natural to want to state your own case,
rather than hear out the other side. But when two people do this, the conversation goes
in circles.

Instead, invite the other party to describe their position, ask how they think they might
resolve the issue, and listen with empathy .
Putting yourself in the other person's shoes is an essential part of negotiation. This
helps you to build mutual respect and understanding – and to achieve an outcome that
satisfies both parties.

4. Practice Active Listening

To identify the source of the conflict you have to really listen. To listen actively:

 Paraphrase the other party's points to show you're listening and really
understand them.
 Look out for non-verbal signals that contradict what they are saying, such
as a hesitant tone behind positive words. Bring these out into the open
sensitively to address them together.
 Use appropriate body language, such as nodding your head, to show
interest and to make it clear that you're following them.

5. Acknowledge Criticism

Some of the things the other person tells you may be difficult to hear. But remember
that criticism or constructive feedback is about job behaviors and not you as a
person.
So, keep an open mind and use criticism to help you to identify areas to improve,
perform better next time, and grow.
GLASERS' THREE-STEP STRATEGY FOR CONFLICT RESOLUTION

- Conflict management consultants Peter and Susan Glaser recommend a three-

step strategy for resolving conflict, and it draws on many of the skills we've
looked at above. You can hear the Glasers talking about their model in our
exclusive interview with them.

The steps are:

1. Prove that you understand their side.

2. Acknowledge that you are part of the problem.

3. Try again if the conversation didn't go well.

CONFLICT RESOLUTION EXAMPLE

Imagine that the heads of two departments are in conflict. Product Manager Sayid
changed the price of a product without letting Marketing Manager Gayanne know. As a
result, the marketing team sent out an email to customers with incorrect prices. They
had to send out a follow-up email apologizing for the error, and make good on the price
some customers paid for the product.

1. Prove That You Understand Their Side

Instead of blaming Sayid, Gayanne asks him how he came to make the decision. She
uses her questioning and listening skills to get the information she needs and to show
that she's truly hearing Sayid's response.

She discovers that Sayid was pressured by a major client to drop the price or risk losing
a contract. She empathizes , saying, "Yes, I've had difficulties with that client before,
too."
As Susan Glaser says, "Only when you believe that I understand you, will you be willing
to try to understand my perspective." [2]

2. Acknowledge That You Are Part of the Problem

If you're in conflict with someone, it's unlikely you're free of all blame. So admit your part
in it. This leads to mutual trust, a better understanding of one another, and makes it
easier to find a solution.
In our scenario, Gayanne could say to Sayid, "I should have shared our marketing
strategy and email send dates with you. I'll do that right away."

3. Try Again if the Conversation Doesn't Go Well

Despite the progress they've made, relations between the two managers remain frosty,
so Sayid calls Gayanne the following week. He says, "I was thinking about our
conversation, and I'd like to try again because I'm not happy with how it went. I've had
time to take your points on board, and I'd like to talk about how we can work together
better going forward."

Remember that you get more than one shot at resolving a conflict. Susan Glaser says,
"There's a myth that if we have a bad conversation with someone it's over. In fact, 'do
overs' are powerful." [3]

Key Points
Conflict is common in the workplace. The biggest mistake you can make is to do
nothing. Unresolved tensions can affect the health and performance of people and
organizations.

So, hone these five conflict resolution skills to pre-empt, manage and fix conflicts with
your co-workers:

1. Raise the issue early.

2. Manage your emotions.

3. Show empathy.

4. Practice active listening.

5. Acknowledge criticism.

Then try the Glasers' three-step conflict resolution strategy to resolve issues together:

1. Prove that you understand their side.

2. Acknowledge that you are part of the problem.

3. Try again if the conversation doesn't go well.