Stop being just a supporting

character in your life be the main

character go for it hi everybody
what's up and welcome back to
another coffee talk conversation
today I'm sipping on some
chamomile lavender tea thank you
to all of you guys who reached out
and told me that peppermint tea
reduces your breast milk supply I
had no idea so i've switched over
to chamomile lavender let me
know what you're drinking or
doing down below as you listen or
tune into the podcast you are the
biggest project that you are ever
going to work on this is a quote
that I stumbled across the other day
and it hit me because I'm working
on a lot of things right now I mean
it's both personally and
professionally I'm working on a lot
of things and the way that i've
navigated working through a lot of
these things is really trying to
follow my intuition and follow my
moral compass and it made me
think a lot about choices that i've
made in the past choices that I'm
making today and how all of it
ultimately every choice we make
feeds into the biggest project that
we ever work on which is
ultimately The Becoming of
ourselves the being of ourselves
and you can be and become at the
same time another quote a work in
progress and a masterpiece at the
same time but we are always
evolving we are always growing in
everything we do from the smallest
decisions in our day to the biggest
 decisions in our lives they all feed
into what it is that we're we're
working on which is always
ourselves it doesn't matter if you
take a business venture if you
choose to study something in
school if you take up a hobby or if
you go through a hard phase in
your life all of it is part of the
making of who you are everything
that we do everything we say
everything that we go through is all
part of building us into the person
we're meant to be coming we
ultimately have control a little hat
tilt to last week's conversation over
what we decide to do with each
choice that we're confronted with
throughout the project of ourselves
something that I i've witnessed
happened a lot and i've also felt it
 happen within myself is this idea
of the things that we end up
working on or putting a lot of time
and energy into in our existence
sort of become part of our identity
for instance i've been working on
all things codes since 2017 this is
the fifth year which feels very Sim
sorry baby sneeze which feels very
symbolic to a lot of things because
one five years is kind of a
milestone but also two there's a lot
of changes going on in the
background which is part of the
project I'm working on that I was
talking about more professionally
and part of that is in having to
almost work through the idea of
Letting Go letting go of this thing
that i've built to where it is or or
moving it and changing it into
 something new and it got me
thinking a lot about well i've put so
much work into this and you know
it it there was so much weight on it
I felt like I was putting a lot of
weight on it because there was a lot
of energy there was a lot of passion
there was a lot of time put into this
and I realized like we'll wait
through the making of codes
through the workings of codes as
much as I was working on this
business and this brand and what it
grew into what it's turned into I
was ultimately working on myself
no matter what happens to it no
matter what it changes into or
grows into it's still always going to
be just a mirror of the work that
I'm doing on myself everything we
do everything we say everything
 we move through work on is
ultimately a mirror for the work
we're doing with ourselves and on
ourselves so the growth that we're
making internally it doesn't do me
any justice to attach to it because
it's external to me the only thing
that we can really come back to is
the idea that everything that
happens on the external is really
only moving us through what we're
meant to go through on our souls
Journey internally and there's so
much motivation that can come
from this idea that you are your
greatest project don't sleep on
yourself do yourself Justice give
yourself the work and the passion
and the time and the energy that
you deserve and yes that means
doing that through the things you
 love through the things that you
have signed up for the
responsibilities that you have or the
priorities in your life but know that
it is ultimately all a reflection of
the work you're doing on yourself
not to be like oh that all that
matters is my own growth all that
matters is my own development on
this planet or on this in this life
because everything we do causes a
ripple effect you're a fiber I'm a
fiber we're all a piece of a fiber
through a giant tapestry or we're all
a drop in a giant ocean and like
your drop definitely creates a
ripple effect but ultimately as you
have manifested on this planet as
the energy that is encompassed
inside of your body moving
through your timeline in life you
 really only can to a certain extent
focus on your solo Drop in the
Ocean but the more clear you make
your drop of water the more strong
you make your piece of fiber the
better the whole tapestry becomes
it's this idea that your vibration
affects the vibration of the whole
planet and we can raise it
collectively it's not self-consumed
at all if you're doing it in the right
energy that bettering yourself will
allow you to be a better person
with and around other people it'll
also hopefully Inspire the people
that you are around to also be
better people or give that energy
around and like Karma it'll come
back and you know people will
receive it well and then they will
have that good energy and want to
also Ripple it out to other people so
working on the project of yourself
makes the biggest difference and
when I say don't sleep on yourself
what I mean is like you have we all
have we're all born with so much
foundation so much material
someone much potential we all
have special unique gifts none of
us are the same none of us are alike
and I think we spend so much time
focusing on what other people are
doing or what other people are
thriving in or the things that other
people have the attachments other
people have that we have like an
invisible ghostly attachment to it's
like we want what other people
have and it drives so much of our
focus and our attention away from
what we already have what we
already have been gifted and given
and that potential material that is in
your hands right now the time that
you have the energy that you have
the things within your life already
as it is because when you Zone in
on that and you look at your life
you look at yourself as a project
and not that you always have to be
working on yourself again coming
back to you can be a project and a
completed piece at the same time
you can be a work in progress and
a masterpiece at the same time but
when you look at your life like a
project of who you are it can make
your life feel so it's exciting so
motivating it's this idea of like
wow I have a morning every single
day that I can choose to do
whatever I want with I can choose
 to you know move through the
certain routine that's going to
ultimately work on that project of
myself or I have a fresh day every
day I wake up or I have this new
idea that I'm just waiting to start
I'm going to start it now even if it's
just the brainstorming process I'm
going to start it today because
ultimately all of this is part of the
project of you no matter how you
decide to spend your time your
energy or your efforts it'll never be
a waste everything is part of your
growth of your process of your
project so even the times where
you feel like you have like slept on
yourself in a sense it's not wasted
because you learned from that
experience or you might still be
learning from that experience I
know that there's times where I feel
like i've definitely wasted my time
or wasted my energy had all these
ideas I wasn't acting on felt really
crappy about myself was really
down in the dumps my mindset
wasn't right I was not motivated I
just needed to just be a flop or I
needed to just flop in general and
as much as it was painful at the
same time in hindsight I realized
wow that rest was what I needed I
needed the Flop so that I would
force myself to rest I needed to
chill and sit on that time so that I
could really do the inner work to
know exactly what project I
wanted to work on in regards to
myself what was worth my time
and energy what was the right
decision to make next what was
 right for me so I could hear my
intuition because life got so loud
that I wasn't sure what I was doing
because I felt it was right anymore
or what I was doing because I
thought that it was what was
supposed to be right even if you
look at the patterns in your life
from good patterns to specifically
bad patterns when you have to
keep relearning the same life
lesson over and over again even
that is part of the project so what
about when you're working on that
life project you're working on
yourself and you face things like
rejection you face things like
hardships how do you work
through that how do you find that
motivation to keep working on
your project when things aren't
 going according to plan well
friends I have some insight to that
which I will talk about right after
this short little break this episode is
supported by wireframe an original
podcast from Adobe this season of
wireframe is geared towards small
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The Branding content design and
social on their own for their
businesses each episode features
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execute a plan to solve their
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Chris doe Courtney Quinn AKA
color me Courtney Hilton Carter
Ellen Marie Bennett and many
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now as a content creator and a
business owner myself and one that
does everything on my own I was
checking out a few of the episodes
as I was getting the inspiration to
do a possible Rebrand for all things
codes all the episodes span so
many different and cool
conversations from how to come
up with a color scheme or color
palette to how to really personalize
your brand or your logo each
episode so it has a Learning lesson
to take away and even more tons of
 motivation and inspiration to get
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brand and really get creative with it
so search for wireframe in your
podcast player we'll also include
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t-a-l-k I know that this is a quote
 said many times and it's definitely
one you've probably heard before
but this idea that rejection is just
redirection things going wrong is
ultimately things going right and if
you don't see it yet you will in
hindsight and I know that that's a
very blanketed statement for a lot
of things that can go wrong for a
lot of rejections that can really
really hurt so filter it through your
own perspective by all means filter
everything we ever talk about
through your own perspective I
held on to so many things in my
past so many things that I felt I put
so much energy or love or time
into and I felt so confused when
they didn't go according to my plan
according to my books and I felt so
hurt when I felt like I had to let go
I felt like losing a limb of me even
the idea of letting go of codes feels
almost like losing a limb of me
because it's something that is so it's
become so integral it's become
such a part of me you know that
said with enough space and enough
distance to really zoom out of your
life and especially enough time if
you can't do that yet you will see
that every single pivot every single
change every single time you've
had to let go it has been in your
best favor or it will be in your best
favor and it's meant to happen for
the right reason and if it's not
working it's not yours if the door
doesn't open it's not your door and
that can be again a very
empowering mindset to look at life
through because it stops feeling
 like the world is rejecting you or
that you're just not good enough
and it starts allowing you to feel
like this just wasn't for me there's
something else that's for me though
or if this has run its course and it's
time to grow or do something new
and the way to stop moving
through life trying to avoid all of
this rejection or all of these things
that could go wrong is to stop
altering yourself stop changing
yourself into the person you think
other people need you to be stop
doing the things that you think
people expect you to do because
again although it's not time wasted
and you might need to go through
that chapter I know I definitely
needed to go through that chapter
of altering myself changing who I
 was being so complacent to being
so easy going doing what I thought
other people wanted me to do so
that I could actually figure out like
wow this doesn't work I feel
hollow I feel empty I don't know
who I am anymore and then got to
rediscover myself got to redefine
myself and it's happening all over
again to me right now in a business
aspect but it's it can be motivating
it can be fun it can also be
devastating it can come with a lot
of grief but when you stop altering
and changing yourself for other
people if I do what my intuition is
calling for what my heart is telling
me to to do if I follow that path if I
stay true to myself then anything
that doesn't work for me was not
meant for me Larissa one of my
best friends sent me this really cool
reel of a woman who was having
this motivational speech and she it
was just a little clip of it but it's
something that has stuck with me
since and she said when you want
something you better run for that
damn bus you don't walk to the bus
or you're gonna miss the bus you
run for the damn bus but if you still
miss that bus then it wasn't your
bus but you can't say that bus
wasn't meant for me if I was just
walking towards it as it was
moving along but if I was doing
everything in my power to make it
to that bus stop in time to make it
onto that bus and I still missed it it
means that be it fake Universe God
whatever you believe in or maybe
just circumstance or coincidence if
 you don't believe in any of those
things it wasn't my bus because
otherwise I'd be on it and in
running towards that bus and
sprinting towards that bus and
working so hard to make it to that
bus I grew I learned I got stronger
we walk because we're afraid to
really try we're afraid of rejection
we're afraid what's gonna happen if
we don't make it to the bus then
what do we do then when
ultimately all of it is part of the
project of who you are like even if
you miss the bus that's part of the
project failure is a part of life not
getting what we want just shows us
what we're not meant for and
brings us closer to the things that
we are and a lot of the times what
we want has been filtered through
so much that we don't even realize
so much subconscious that we
don't even realize we filter what we
want through what Society tells us
to want what's trending what
somebody that we're inspired by or
motivated has again when that
noise gets so loud you can lose
yourself chasing buses that aren't
yours and when you get quiet when
you slow down and even
sometimes when you stop chasing
random buses sit for a second in
the park and think okay what bus
do I actually really want to catch
then you can really drive all of
your soul focused energy and time
into chasing the right bus and even
if you don't make it it doesn't
matter because it's all down to the
project of you of who you are and
another bus will come at a different
time but it might come to that same
spot or you might have to chase to
a different bus stop but that's the
game of life that's what we're here
to do so the energy I want to leave
you with today the energy that I'm
really trying to hit home through
your speakers or through your
screen is you are the biggest
project you are ever going to work
on anything that you don't achieve
is nothing against who you are it's
part of the making of who you are
you can work towards things and
ultimately work on the project of
yourself while also enjoying your
life and don't sleep on yourself
don't sleep on this time don't even
sleep on the idea that during your
rest time during your down time
 during your hard times that it's all
still part of building character
building who you are stop focusing
on the projects other people are
working on it's time to focus back
on yourself it's time to Zone back
into what calls to you the buses
that are leaving the station that you
want to get on and remember that
everything that you do every bus
you chase every hobby you take up
every lesson you learn everything
you say every connection you
make every relationship you go
through is all part of the project of
you it's all part of the making of
your life so harness that main
character energy and not in the
sense that there's only one movie
be aware that everybody is a main
character in their own lives but
 stop being just a supporting
character in your life be the main
character go for it and especially in
this pocket of life I mean we're
winding down to the end of the
year November is always this
weird month where there's not a
whole lot going on unless you're in
the states than it's U.S
Thanksgiving but like realistically
it always kind of feels like this
weird lull between Halloween and
fall and Christmas time now is the
time to be focusing on the things
you want to bring into your life in
the new year now is the time to
start brainstorming Now's the Time
to think of the projects the buses
you want to chase this is the part of
the movie where you just gained
all that inspiration you just gained
all that motivation there's a song in
the background and it's all
motivating and it's fast clips of you
working on everything and that's
not actually how life is but that's
the energy energy that you want to
take with you while you go
through all of the hard work while
you take all the steps you need to
to continue to be in your becoming
I feel like lessons find you when
they need to or when they're right
for you and between stumbling
across that quote the thing that
Larissa had sent me all of the stuff
going on more professionally in
my life right now and the things
going on in my life personally all
of this change all of these
transitions even just all of these
decisions that i've been confronted
with and i've had to sit with and be
like what's the right decision to
make what how do I stay true to
myself and make the decision that's
best for myself when I let go of all
of my attachments and I look at my
life through the perspective of the
everything I do is working on who
I am as a person and it's building
my character what decision do I
want to make through that lens
what bus do I want to chase
through that lens how do I want to
move through my life how do I
want to look at these obstacles in
my life through that lens with the
time and energy that I have and so
that's what elicited this
conversation today and I'd love to
hear any thoughts that you know
sparked in you from this
 conversation so feel free to come
on over to youtube if you aren't
here already and leave your
thoughts down below other than
that I am giving you guys so much
love and so much energy as you
continue to work on the projects of
yourselves continue to be that main
character in your own life and I
will chat with all of you guys in
our next Coffee Talk podcast
episode bye everyone thank you
[Music] [Applause] [Music]
[Applause] [Music] thank you.

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