ABOUT  SERVICES  INVESTMENT COURSES BLOG EVENTS & GROUPS

CONTACT US

HOW TO STOP STRESS AND ANXIETY FROM

T R I G G E R I N G PA S T T R A U M A : 5 T I P S

Search … SEARCH
How to stop stress and anxiety from getting out of hand
and triggering past trauma : 5 Tips | Co-written by Arrezo
Azimzadeh, BA, Psych, Behavioral Therapist & Owner of Wish RECENT
Upon Arrezo POSTS

Stop stress and anxiety: Have you ever noticed your hands getting sweaty on a first date or How to Navigate a Breakup

felt your heart pound during an exam? Well, then you are aware that you can feel Why Do I Feel Guilty all the
stress/anxiety from both your mind and body. When we go through stress/anxiety, our Time?
bodies flood our nervous system with cortisol and adrenaline putting us in a state of “fight
Why Does My Partner Need
or flight”. If you have experienced old traumatic events such as childhood abuse or disloyal
Space?
relationships, then you know that any stressful experience can activate your hidden
How to Stop Parenting Your
memories or “triggers” automatically. These memories are typically hidden to protect us
Partner
from recurring emotional pain. However, over time these memories, triggers or chronic
stress/anxiety can cause psychological complications in all areas of our life. Stop Trying To Fix Everything
in Your Relationship

ARCHIVES

September 2023

June 2022

February 2022

September 2021

June 2021

April 2021

March 2021

February 2021
:
 January 2021

November 2020

October 2020

August 2020

July 2020

March 2020

February 2020

August 2019

March 2019

September 2018

July 2018

March 2018

January 2018
Anxiety and stress can be debilitating. Approximately 40 million American adults — roughly
November 2017
18% of the population — have an anxiety disorder, according to the Anxiety and Depression
October 2017
Association of America.
September 2017
The combination of reactions to stress/anxiety is known as the “fight-or-flight” response.
July 2017
This was intended to be a survival mechanism enabling a quick response in a threatening
situation. May 2017

March 2017
The sequence of hormonal changes and physiological responses help an
December 2016
individual fight the threat off or flee to safety. However, the body can also
overreact to stressors that are not life-threatening, such as societal October 2016
pressures, family difficulties, and relationship conflicts, but can still give off August 2016
the same chemical reaction.”
June 2016

IN AN ARTICLE BY HARVARD HEALTH PUBLISHING. April 2016

March 2016
Because the modern human is not generally fighting off man-eating predators, but is often
facing emotional/societal external pressures, we can be fueled with fight or flight energy January 2016

daily. This can lead to high blood pressure, anxiety disorders, chronic depression, addiction, December 2015
and obesity. It is important to be aware of how your body reacts to stress/anxiety in order September 2015
to consciously stop yourself from going down a mental storyline or memory that only feeds
August 2015
your perception of the threatening situation, (i.e. feeling more stress/anxiety and/or
experiencing past trauma). May 2015

March 2015
Here’s an example; it is March 2020 and Samantha is soon to be graduating. She is
January 2015
experiencing lockdown with her new boyfriend, roommate and roommate’s boyfriend for
over a month. She recently lost her job, had a quarantined birthday, took her last quarter of December 2014
college online and continued to experience tragedies in her family. She was frustrated, October 2014
disappointed and angry, but she bottled up her emotions and became even more isolated.
August 2014
Samantha was unaware that the stay-at-home policies had created a reality where she was
reliving a similar negative experience from her childhood.
C AT E G O R I E S
“Growing up it was difficult for me to feel like I had a sense of self-identity in my household. I
2020
did as I was told, suppressed my feelings and was always at home because my parents
:
wanted to keep me safe. When I got to college, I learned how to be independent, speak up Anxiety
when I wanted and cope with my stress through working out and eating healthy. Quarantine
Breakups
changed everything because I felt like I couldn’t do much on top of the fact that my
Children
boyfriend kept demanding me around. It had been a long time since I felt this much
confinement and I was shutting down.” Conflict

Control
The frustrating experience of feeling trapped again caused Samantha to no longer feel in
control. Her “fight-or-flight” mechanism kicked in and she reacted to it as she innately knew Counseling

how to. In times of stress our brains revert to how we once used to handle situations, which COVID19
can cause us to regress our growth and forget how to move forward. Does this sound
Dating
familiar?
Defense Mechanisms
Before you get too stressed out reading this article, it is important to know that not all Friendship
stress is “bad” stress! Momentary stress, such as last-minute assignments, or tight deadlines
Gratitude
can boost your brain’s performance. It’s just about establishing a balance.
Guilt
Here are 5 tips on how to stop stress and anxiety from getting out of hand and triggering past trauma:
Intimacy & Sex
Tip #1 How to Stop Stress and Anxiety: “Sit in your sh*t”… Longterm Relationships
err, emotions. Marriage

You’re probably wondering, how can I stop myself from triggering past trauma? Well for Misunderstandings
starters, we would advise that first you sit with the feeling no matter how uncomfortable it Motherhood
is. Intentionally, focus only on your emotions at that moment. Try saying out loud to yourself,
Past
“I feel ______ and it’s ok.” (Use this emotion wheel if you are struggling with identifying your
feelings.) Q&A

Romance
Why is sitting with your emotions helpful? Well, because like anything, an
Self Reflection
emotion is fleeting. We promise the feeling will pass when you don’t attach a
storyline to it, even if the storyline was once your reality, it doesn’t mean it is Toxic Relationships

in this moment. Uncategorized

When the feeling does pass, you will have a better understanding of how you truly feel, not
just be stuck in a reaction of flight or flight. You will also start feeling more empowered to
face your stress/anxiety without feeling completely out of control and debilitated with
undesirable symptoms.

Tip #2 How to Stop Stress and

Anxiety: You don’t have to believe
everything you think.

Try not to think about old upsets, by

simply saying to yourself, “I don’t have
to listen to everything my thoughts
say.” When you suffer from stress and
anxiety, you are having a complicated
relationship with both sides of your
brain: the cognitive brain and the emotional brain. Anxiety is only felt when signals from the
emotional brain overpower the cognitive brain and into our consciousness.

When you have thoughts that your anxiety will never get better, that’s your emotional side
:
of the brain working to protect you in case of failure. It can feel like your mind is torturing
you to worry, analyze, seek reassurance, or shut down with thoughts of what could go
wrong; but your mind is doing what all minds do, it is warning you in order to keep you safe.
So, be conscious of what is happening and enable the thoughts to come and go and realize
it’s your mind doing it’s job. The important thing is not what thoughts you have, but what
you do when you have them in that state. So the next time your mind starts filling your head
with triggers, reassure yourself that it’s a false alarm and sit with the emotion without
listening to your brain.

Tip #3 How to Stop Stress and Anxiety: Quick, don’t react!

Refrain from an immediate reaction, by realizing that it is only an attempt to control the
situation or get out of it. If you give in and react, you begin to lack logical thinking as your
body and mind regress to old coping mechanisms. If you identify how you react to stressful
situations, you can put yourself in a better position to manage it. Even if you are unable to
eliminate stress from your life, how you react to it can determine whether you regress or
progress. According to Mayo Clinic these changes can significantly improve your stress and
anxiety levels:

Cut back on your obligations when possible. Take a look at your schedule and find
activities, meetings, chores, or dinners that you can cut back on for the time being.
That way you don’t overwhelm yourself and accidentally react right away.

Prepare ahead. Stress begins to pile on when you run out of time. Stay on top of things
that may trigger stress (meetings, trips, appointments, family dinners, etc) and
schedule realistic goals to get each task done. For example, if traffic jams stress you out
then build that time into your schedule so you don’t overload your mind.

Pick up a new hobby. When you start something exciting and new, it can calm your
restless mind. Try art, gardening, reading, etc – but make sure these things don’t cause
you to get competitive because the goal is to stay relaxed and stress free.

Stay Active. Scientists have found that exercise benefits can soothe stress levels and
give you a feeling of power over your body and life.Exercising, and physical activity
produce chemicals in the brain known as endorphins which can enhance your brain’s
emotional need of feeling good and positive.

By learning new ways to handle the situation before it occurs, it can put you in a better
position to manage stress and anxiety. So, always remember to take a step back, and refrain
yourself from the impulsive reactions before they control you.

Tip #4 How to Stop Stress and Anxiety: Practice Mindfulness Daily

By practicing mindfulness regularly, you will improve your brain function, which will
enhance your ability to avoid excessive stress. It increases your capacity to savor the
pleasures in life, helps you engage in activities and creates healthier ways for you to deal
with stressful events.

Behavioral therapists state that, “By focusing on the here and now, many
people who practice mindfulness find that they are less likely to get caught up
in worries about the future or regrets over the past, pay attention to their
thoughts and sensations without judgment, and are able to improve physical
:
 and mental health over time.”

IN AN ARTICLE BY HARVARD HEALTH PUBLISHING.

Mindfulness meditation works to build your

concentration. Here are a few mindful techniques:

Sit quietly and focus on your breathing as you

let your thoughts, emotions and bodily
sensations come and go without judging how
you feel about it. Just let them pass through.
Pay attention to what comes to mind and
discover whether it’s a physical or mental need that seems to pop-up the most. Do not
focus on a particular feeling or idea, but rather allow your thoughts to flow, to evaluate
the habits. This will give you a better understanding of what to work on for later.

Continue the process daily. It may not seem relaxing, but over time it provides the key
to unlock wider and wider ranges of thinking.

For more mindful meditation techniques visit, Benefits of Mindfulness.

Tip #5 How to Stop Stress and Anxiety: Connect the dots.

By understanding your trauma and coping mechanisms, it may be very helpful for you to
realize which ones still work for you and which ones provoke more stress. Marla Paul,
Health & Medicine Editor showed that individuals remember hidden traumatic events when
they are in a similar state of mind:

“A process known as dependent learning is believed to contribute to the

formation of memories that are inaccessible to normal consciousness. Thus,
memories formed in a particular mood, arousal or drug-induced state can
best be retrieved when the brain is back in that state.”

In other words, our minds are able to remember past memories when under a similar
amount of stress and may provoke us to behave in ways we used to. For example, if a child
had to parent their parents growing up, they may have learned to cope by being super self
reliant and rigid in their behavior. When the child grows up, they may find themselves
incredibly overwhelmed with daily tasks and often have panic attacks because they don’t
know how to ask for help. If they never connect the dots from childhood to current panic
attacks, they may never see that their coping strategy to be self reliant has its limitations in
adulthood.

It is important to recognize that our bodies will naturally want to revert to its old ways of
coping, but by being aware of and practicing new coping strategies will only remind us that
our past can only have control over our future if we allow it.

Want even more support with your anxiety and stress? Contact a therapist and explore how
they may help!

Alysha Jeney
ALL POSTS
:
 ALL POSTS

5 THOUGHTS ON “HOW TO STOP

STRESS AND ANXIETY FROM
T R I G G E R I N G PA S T T R AU M A : 5 T I P S ”
August 27, 2020 at 11:33 pm

Hiii, i finally really like your content. What do you think about this book “His
Secret Obsession ”
Kensy

September 5, 2020 at 10:31 pm

I don’t know how to go about this but is it possible that my other is the cause
of my anxiety..? Some how I always end up being the one she lash out on.
Dj Mc
And since COVID she has been the bread winner .. I’m sure that is the issue.
Stretch

September 20, 2020 at 11:16 am

I like your article. I was really keen on making my own blogging website also.
I realize it will be hard yet I’ll unquestionably take your tips in for reference.
Md Saiful
Much appreciated once more.
Islam

December 6, 2020 at 9:29 pm

Hi, so I started a relationship with this guy last year, I told him my intentions
and we shared everything. I was single for over 3 years before him. However
#Confused
as we progress I realized he saved my contact as an initial in his phone, he
deletes the conversations we have via text. He removes my pictures from
his gallery and secretive all the time. We hardly have any progressive
conversations anymore. I had asked him why he does that but he’s defensive
instead, blames me for all our fights and say he hates talking too much and
doesn’t expect such behavior from me.
I have broken up with him but he apologized and said he will change, I don’t
see that change and I feel like he’s just playing. I still want to understand
why, since I have been loyal and respectful, then I can leave peacefully.
Should I just leave instead?

December 13, 2020 at 10:37 am

Hi #Confused– I can hear your concerns loud and clear. It is very hard to
say what his intentions are, but I think it would be valid for you to express
Alysha
your desires for more transparency. It would also be beneficial to discuss
Jeney
both of your “intentions” and desires of your relationship again, so you
can both determine if you are on the same page. It sounds like maybe you
are both giving each other mixed messages that need to be clarified.
:
 FEATURED IN

Ready to make fulfilling changes? C O N TA C T U

Schedule your appointment today.

 

ABOUT  SERVICES  INVESTMENT COURSES BLOG EVENTS & GROUPS

C O P Y R I G H T © 2 0 2 3 M O D E R N L O V E C O U N S E L I N G ™
: