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PALGRAVE STUDIES IN COMMUNICATION FOR SOCIAL CHANGE

Digital
Intimate
Publics
and Social
Media

Edited by
Amy Shields Dobson
Brady Robards
Nicholas Carah
Palgrave Studies in Communication for Social
Change

Series Editors
Pradip Thomas
University of Queensland
Australia

Elske van de Fliert


University of Queensland
Australia
Communication for Social Change (CSC) is a defined field of academic
enquiry that is explicitly transdisciplinary and that has been shaped by
a variety of theoretical inputs from a variety of traditions, from sociol-
ogy and development to social movement studies. The leveraging of
communication, information and the media in social change is the
basis for a global industry that is supported by governments, develop-
ment aid agencies, foundations, and international and local NGOs. It
is also the basis for multiple interventions at grassroots levels, with par-
ticipatory communication processes and community media making a
difference through raising awareness, mobilising communities, strength-
ening empowerment and contributing to local change. This series on
Communication for Social Change intentionally provides the space for
critical writings in CSC theory, practice, policy, strategy and methods. It
fills a gap in the field by exploring new thinking, institutional critiques
and innovative methods. It offers the opportunity for scholars and prac-
titioners to engage with CSC as both an industry and as a local prac-
tice, shaped by political economy as much as by local cultural needs.
The series explicitly intends to highlight, critique and explore the gaps
between ideological promise, institutional performance and realities of
practice.

More information about this series at


http://www.palgrave.com/gp/series/14642
Amy Shields Dobson · Brady Robards
Nicholas Carah
Editors

Digital Intimate
Publics and Social
Media
Editors
Amy Shields Dobson Nicholas Carah
Curtin University School of Communication and Arts
Bentley, WA, Australia University of Queensland
Brisbane, QLD, Australia
Brady Robards
Monash University
Melbourne, VIC, Australia

Palgrave Studies in Communication for Social Change


ISBN 978-3-319-97606-8 ISBN 978-3-319-97607-5 (eBook)
https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-319-97607-5

Library of Congress Control Number: 2018950723

© The Editor(s) (if applicable) and The Author(s) 2018


This work is subject to copyright. All rights are solely and exclusively licensed by the
Publisher, whether the whole or part of the material is concerned, specifically the rights
of translation, reprinting, reuse of illustrations, recitation, broadcasting, reproduction
on microfilms or in any other physical way, and transmission or information storage and
retrieval, electronic adaptation, computer software, or by similar or dissimilar methodology
now known or hereafter developed.
The use of general descriptive names, registered names, trademarks, service marks, etc. in this
publication does not imply, even in the absence of a specific statement, that such names are
exempt from the relevant protective laws and regulations and therefore free for general use.
The publisher, the authors and the editors are safe to assume that the advice and
information in this book are believed to be true and accurate at the date of publication.
Neither the publisher nor the authors or the editors give a warranty, express or implied,
with respect to the material contained herein or for any errors or omissions that may have
been made. The publisher remains neutral with regard to jurisdictional claims in published
maps and institutional affiliations.

Cover credit: Pavel_R

This Palgrave Macmillan imprint is published by the registered company Springer Nature
Switzerland AG
The registered company address is: Gewerbestrasse 11, 6330 Cham, Switzerland
Acknowledgements

A book like this takes a crowd of people to make a reality, and we wish to
acknowledge that crowd. As we map out in more detail in the introduc-
tion, this book emerged out of a now-annual symposium (in its fourth
year at the time of writing), and for supporting the first two of these
symposia we are indebted to the Institute for Advanced Studies in
the Humanities and the School of Communication and Arts at the
University of Queensland.
Thank you to everyone who has participated in these ‘Digital
Intimacies’ symposia over the years—many of you are contributors to the
book, and many others can be felt in the way ideas have been shaped or
thinking has been prodded.
We also wish to acknowledge and thank Graeme Turner for his ongo-
ing intellectual guidance and encouragement. Graeme has been a key
figure in cultural studies for decades, but more than this he has been a
mentor and enabler for many junior scholars. We three have been espe-
cially grateful for his support over the years, in particular around this
project.
We acknowledge the patience, generosity, and of course the words of
all the contributors to this book. It is a collection of work that we are
truly proud of, and it has been a pleasure for us to work with all of you
to bring it together.

v
vi    Acknowledgements

We thank our publishers at Palgrave Macmillan, especially Heloise


Harding and Lucy Batrouney, for their keen interest in the project at the
outset, and also their flexibility with our schedules and timelines towards
the end of the project.
Finally, we wish to thank our own friends and families for their support
and love.

Amy Shields Dobson


Brady Robards
Nicholas Carah
Contents

Part I Shaping Intimacy

1 Digital Intimate Publics and Social Media: Towards


Theorising Public Lives on Private Platforms 3
Amy Shields Dobson, Nicholas Carah and Brady Robards

2 Publicising Privacy, Weaponising Publicity:


The Dialectic of Online Abuse on Social Media 29
Michael Salter

3 Software Intimacies (Social Media


and the Unbearability of Death) 45
Grant Bollmer

4 Snapshots of Afterlife: The Cultural Intimacies


of Posthumous Camera Phone Practices 59
Larissa Hjorth

5 Remembering Through Facebook: Mediated


Memory and Intimate Digital Traces 75
Brady Robards, Sian Lincoln, Benjamin C. Pinkard
and Jane Harris

vii
viii    Contents

6 Sexting, Intimate and Sexual Media Practices,


and Social Justice 93
Amy Shields Dobson

Part II Public Bodies

7 Digital Masculine Disruptions: Intimate Webcam


Forums and the Challenge to Heterosexual
Normativities 113
Rob Cover

8 ‘This Dapper Hotty Is Working That Tweed Look’:


Extending Workplace Affects on TubeCrush 129
Adrienne Evans and Sarah Riley

9 Effervescence, Resonance and Emotive Practice on


Social Media: Public Expressions of Heartbreak
Among Young Filipino Twitter Users 145
Jozon A. Lorenzana

10 ‘We’re All Gonna Make It Brah’: Homosocial


Relations, Vulnerability and Intimacy in an Online
Bodybuilding Community 161
Mair Underwood

11 ‘It’s Nice to See You’re Not the Only One with


Kinks’: Presenting Intimate Privates in Intimate
Publics on Tumblr 177
Matthew Hart

12 Between Firefighting and Flaming: Collective and


Personal Trans* and Gender-Diverse Social Media 193
Son Vivienne
Contents    ix

Part III Negotiating Intimacy

13 ‘There Are Literally No Rules When It Comes to


These Things’: Ethical Practice and the Use of Dating/
Hook-Up Apps 213
Paul Byron and Kath Albury

14 Speaking to the Other: Digital Intimate Publics


and Gamergate 231
Amanda Elliot

15 Ambivalent Intimacies: Entangled Pains and Gains


Through Facebook Use in Transnational Family Life 247
Earvin Charles Cabalquinto

16 Oversharing Is the Norm 265


Jenny Kennedy

17 Archives of Sadness: Sharing Bereavement


and Generating Emotional Exchange Between
Strangers on YouTube 281
Margaret Gibson and Golie Talaie

Index 299
Notes on Contributors

Kath Albury is a Professor of Media and Communication at Swinburne


University of Technology, Australia. Her current research focuses on
young people’s practices of digital self-representation, and the role of
user-generated media (including social networking platforms) in formal
and informal sexual learning. Kath leads the Australian Research Council
Linkage Project ‘Safety, risk and wellbeing on digital dating apps’, with
industry partners ACON Health (formerly the AIDS Council of NSW)
and Family Planning NSW.
Grant Bollmer is the author of the books Inhuman Networks: Social
Media and the Archaeology of Connection (Bloomsbury, 2016) and
Theorizing Digital Cultures (SAGE, 2018). He is an Assistant Professor
of Media Studies at North Carolina State University, where he teaches in
the Department of Communication and the Communication, Rhetoric,
and Digital Media Ph.D. program, and is an Honorary Associate of the
Department of Media and Communication at the University of Sydney.
Paul Byron is a Research Associate at Swinburne University’s
Department of Media and Communication. He researches digital media
and cultures of care, including LGBTIQ+ young people’s practices of
peer-based support, and dating and hook-up app use as everyday prac-
tice. His work centres on uses of digital media for practicing health, inti-
macy, and friendship. Follow Paul on Twitter: @paulibyron.

xi
xii    Notes on Contributors

Earvin Charles Cabalquinto is a Lecturer in the School of Media, Film


and Journalism at Monash University. His primary research interests
include transnational communication, mediated intimacies, caregiving at
a distance, digitalisation of public and domestic spaces, and the politics
of mediated mobilities. To know more about his research, access www.
ecabalquinto.com. Follow Earvin on Twitter: @earvsc.
Nicholas Carah is a Senior Lecturer in the School of Communication
and Arts at The University of Queensland. He is the author of Pop
Brands: Branding, Popular Music and Young People (Peter Lang, 2010),
Media & Society: Production, Content and Participation (Sage, 2015),
and Brand Machines, Sensory Media & Calculative Culture (Palgrave,
2016). His research examines the intersections between brand culture
and media platforms. He has a particular interest in alcohol promotion
and consumption. Follow Nicholas on Twitter: @nnniccc.
Rob Cover is an Associate Professor at The University of Western
Australia. He has received Australian Research Council funding for pro-
jects on youth sexuality (2015–2018), and gender diversity in Australian
film (2018–2020). He has published widely on topics in digital media
theory and interactivity, youth sociology, health communication, and
resilience. Recent books include: Queer Youth Suicide, Culture and
Identity: Unliveable Lives? (Routledge, 2012), Vulnerability and Exposure
(Scholarly, 2015), Digital Identities: Creating and Communicating the
Online Self (2016) and Emergent Identities: New Sexualities, Genders and
Relationships in a Digital Era (Routledge, in press). Profile and links at:
http://www.uwa.edu.au/people/rob.cover.
Amy Shields Dobson is a Lecturer in Internet Studies at Curtin
University. Her work focuses on youth, gender politics, social media, and
feminine subjectivities. She is the author of Postfeminist Digital Cultures
(2015), published by Palgrave. Her recent projects include research into
cyber-safety and sexting education, female genital cosmetic surgery, and
girls’ and young women’s social media cultures. Follow Amy on Twitter:
@AmyDobsonCU.
Amanda Elliot is a Lecturer in the Department of Sociology and Social
Policy at the University of Sydney. Her primary research interests include
the transformation of work and welfare in the twenty-first century and,
more recently, politics, identity, work, and play in the digital economy.
Follow Amanda on Twitter: @whimsical__001.
Notes on Contributors    xiii

Adrienne Evans is Reader in Media in the Center for Post-digital


Cultures at Coventry University, UK. Past research explored sexiness;
current work develops accounts of digital culture, postfeminist mas-
culinity, and healthism. Her co-authored books include Technologies of
Sexiness: Sex, Identity and Consumer Culture (Oxford University Press,
2014) and Postfeminism and Health (Routledge, 2018).
Margaret Gibson is a Senior Lecturer in Sociology in the School of
Humanities, Languages and Social Science, Griffith University, Australia
and member of the Griffith Centre for Cultural Research. Her research
focuses on objects of mourning, memory and memorialisation and the
transnational, social interface of online mourning and memorialisation
practices. She is author of Objects of the Dead: Mourning and Memory
in Everyday Life (MUP, 2008) and co-author of Living and Dying in a
Virtual World: Digital kinships, Nostalgia, and Mourning in Second Life,
(Palgrave Macmillan, 2018).
Jane Harris is a Ph.D. student at the Public Health Institute, Liverpool
John Moores University, UK. Her research interests focus on the role
social media plays in health promotion, young people’s engagement with
health risk and opportunity online and the boundaries between health
and digital media literacy.
Matthew Hart is a Lecturer in the School of Media, Communication
and Sociology at the University of Leicester, UK. His research primar-
ily focuses on young people’s risky, intimate, and social internet practices
within visual social media, particularly around the production and shar-
ing of nude selfies. Follow Matt on Twitter: @SociologyZombie.
Distinguished Professor Larissa Hjorth is an artist and digital eth-
nographer. Hjorth has two decades experience working in cross-cultural,
interdisciplinary, collaborative creative practice and socially innova-
tive digital media research. Hjorth is currently the Design & Creative
Practice ECP Platform director at RMIT University. The research
Platform focuses on interdisciplinary collaboration and creative solutions
to real-world problems.
Jenny Kennedy is a Postdoctoral Research Fellow in Media and
Communications at RMIT University. She researches the social conse-
quences of digital media and the internet in domestic contexts. Jenny
is author of Digital Media, Sharing and Everyday Life (Routledge,
xiv    Notes on Contributors

forthcoming), and co-author of Digital Domesticity: Media, Materiality


and Home Life (Oxford University Press, forthcoming), and Grand
Designs: Consumer Markets and Home-Making (Palgrave, forthcoming).
Sian Lincoln is Reader in Communication, Media & Youth Culture at
Liverpool John Moores University, UK. Her research focuses on youth
culture and private space and young people’s uses of social media in rela-
tion to identity and growing up. Sian is author of Youth Culture and
Private Space (Palgrave Macmillan, 2012). She is co-editor of 2 book
series: Cinema and Youth Cultures (Routledge) and Palgrave Studies in
the History of Subcultures & Popular Music. Sian is on the management
group of the Interdisciplinary Network for the Study of Music, Subcultures
and Social Change.
Jozon A. Lorenzana is Assistant Professor in the Department of
Communication, School of Social Sciences, Ateneo de Manila University.
Dr. Lorenzana’s critical ethnographic research covers interrelated themes
of sociality, intimacy, identity, morality, emotions, and media practices
among Filipino middle classes, migrant groups and queer people.
Benjamin C. Pinkard is a Doctoral Candidate at the School of Social
Sciences, University of Tasmania. Ben’s research explores the connec-
tions between technologies and the body in online and offline spaces,
investigating the relationship digital technologies have to health and
wellbeing among gender diverse young Australians. Follow Ben on
Twitter: @bcpinkard.
Sarah Riley is a Reader in Critical Psychology at Aberystwyth University,
UK and leader for the Centre for Critical Psychology there. Her research
focuses on the psychological impact of neoliberalism, addressing ques-
tions of gender, embodiment, health, youth culture, and citizenship. Her
co-authored books include Critical Bodies (Palgrave/Macmillan, 2008),
Doing Your Qualitative Research Project (Sage, 2012), Technologies
of Sexiness: Sex, Identity and Consumer Culture (Oxford University
Press, USA, 2014), Postfeminism and Health (Routledge, 2018) and
Postfeminism and Body Image (Routledge, forthcoming). Twitter: @
sarahrileybrown.
Brady Robards is a Senior Lecturer in Sociology in the School of Social
Sciences at Monash University. He studies digital culture, with a focus
on how people use and produce social media and how social media
Notes on Contributors    xv

platforms operate as memory archives made up of digital traces of life


over years of use. Brady has studied social media use among particular
groups, such as LGBTIQ+ people, young people, tourists, and in the
context of alcohol consumption. For more, visit Brady’s website: brady-
robards.com. Follow Brady on Twitter: @bradyjay.
Michael Salter is a Senior Lecturer in Criminology in the School of
Social Sciences and Psychology at Western Sydney University, where he
leads the violence team of the Sexualities and Genders Research initia-
tive. He specialises in the study of complex and organised forms of sex-
ual violence, and he is the author of Organised Sexual Abuse (Routledge,
2013) and Crime, Justice and Social Media (Routledge, 2017).
Golie Talaie is a visual artist and researcher in the fields of photography
and death studies. In her work, she explores the relationship between
photography, memory, and death, from the sites of cemeteries (Until
Death Do Us Part, 2015) to the spaces of the Internet (A Transatlantic
Love, 2010). She is currently a Ph.D. candidate in the School of
Humanities, Languages and Social Science at Griffith University,
Brisbane. In her thesis, titled ‘Funerary Images and their significance to
the bereaved’, Golie investigates the use of photography and video as
part of family imagery and one’s experience of the loss of a loved one.
Mair Underwood is an anthropologist of the body and Lecturer
in Anthropology and Sociology in the School of Social Science, the
University of Queensland. Her research focuses on the experience of the
body, with a special interest in body modifications such as tattoo and
bodybuilding. She is currently conducting an online ethnography with
recreational bodybuilders, and has published journal articles on numer-
ous aspects of their experience such as their emotion work and perfor-
mance and image enhancing drug use. You can find her on Facebook,
Instagram, and YouTube where you can keep up with her research and
discuss it with her. Her passion is community engagement and making
social science accessible to the general public.
Son Vivienne is a Lecturer and researcher in Digital Media at RMIT.
Son is also involved in community development and arts as an activist
and media-maker. Their principal expertise is digital self-representation,
online activism, queer identity, and rhetorical strategies/feminist practices
for speaking and listening across difference. Their work on digital sto-
rytelling is published as Digital Identity and Everyday Activism: Sharing
xvi    Notes on Contributors

Private Stories with Networked Publics (Palgrave, 2016). Son curates sev-
eral collective storytelling websites for queer (www.rainbowfamilytree.
com) and gender-diverse (www.storiesbeyondgender.com) communities
and has over twenty years of multimedia production and distribution
experience. For more info visit Son’s website: www.incitestories.com.au.
List of Figures

Fig. 11.1 A typical NSFW selfie shared by Debra’s on her Tumblr,


aimed at promoting female body positivity and acceptance 184
Fig. 11.2 A collage of NSFW selfies Jesse had uploaded to his Tumblr.
Jesse shares images of his pre-op body to show other Trans
people that they are not alone on Tumblr 185
Fig. 11.3 Judith’s NSFW selfies allow her to create a safe space in
which to intimately connect with others on Tumblr who
struggle to find acceptance for their kinks elsewhere online
or offline 187
Fig. 15.1 A sample photo of Efren’s pair of shoes 255
Fig. 15.2 Dolor accessing Facebook in the family living room’s
desktop computer 258

xvii
Introduction

From public grief and trauma gone viral on YouTube, to hook-up


and dating apps like Grindr and Tinder, to daily documentations on
Facebook of meals, coffees, dreams, births, deaths, new relationships,
breakups, and much more, intimate lives are being played out, recorded,
commodified, and constituted through social media. Even when we are
physically alone or isolated, affect travels through digital infrastructures:
fibre and copper, satellites, wifi signals, laptops, smartphones, and finger-
tips. Digital intimacies resonate, console, arouse, invite, surprise, compel,
distract, and disappoint.
Lauren Berlant writes that intimacy ‘involves an aspiration for a narra-
tive about something shared, a story about both oneself and others that
will turn out in a particular way’ (1998, p. 282–283). Berlant argues that
this story occurs most commonly within ‘zones of familiarity’—between
friends, between a couple, within families. Social media can function to
challenge or disrupt the boundaries of these zones. The boundaries of
‘private’ realms are also challenged by the ways in which social media
can make intimacies more public, for instance, as private messages can
be captured and shared in unintended contexts, and as long-forgotten
relationships can be resurfaced on Facebook. As Berlant notes, our inti-
mate lives ‘absorb and repel the rhetorics, laws, ethics and ideologies of
the hegemonic public sphere, but also personalise the effects of the pub-
lic sphere and reproduce a fantasy that private life is the real in contrast
to collective life’. Berlant sets out to ‘understand the pedagogies that
encourage people to identify having a life with having an intimate life’

xix
xx    Introduction

(1998, pp. 282–283). In this book we seek, in part, to advance this mis-
sion by bringing together a series of timely and carefully selected essays
by scholars of digital cultures who are engaging with ideas about inti-
mate publics, ‘intimacy’ in its many forms in networked publics, and the
kind of ‘mass intimacy’ social media facilitates and commodifies. As the
chapters in this collection make clear, social media platforms are now
centrally part of the process whereby pedagogies of intimate life as life
itself are learnt, (re)constituted, (re)formed, contested, and disrupted.
The study of social media practices has come to offer unique insights
into the kinds of questions raised by Berlant, among other queer and
feminist theorists, about what happens to power dynamics when intimate
practices are made public, and about intimacy as public and political,
as defined and shaped by cultural politics and pedagogies, institutions,
technologies, as well as geographies. In the following chapter, we chart
a theory of digital intimate publics in more detail. We note, following
Berlant (2008), that ‘Intimate publics can be understood as scenes—
centred around media and culture—of the commodification of intimacy,
self, and political identities; pedagogical discipline about normativity
and normative intimate desires for different groups of subjects; as well
as scenes that promise and generate feelings of belonging and consola-
tion’. The intimate publics of social media are increasingly the grounds
of our identities, affects, and politics. They are reshaping the institu-
tions of public life. The exploration, expression, and experimentation
with the intimate that unfolds on social media is both conditioned by,
and challenging to, the hegemonic public sphere. Berlant’s (2008) hope-
fulness for intimate publics is their capacity to foster ‘a porous, affective
scene of identification’ for ‘nondominant people’. This is one part of
the promise of social media cultures that create, as Berlant notes of inti-
mate publics, an ‘experience of belonging’ and ‘a complex of consola-
tion, confirmation, discipline, and discussion about how to live as an x’
(2008, p. viii). And yet, social media are also machines through which
intimate practices are publicised, privatised, commodified, and exploited.
On these platforms, intimate life is increasingly recognisable to machines,
and algorithms shape and order intimate identities and experiences. The
ubiquitous presence of platforms in our day-to-day flows of attention
and feeling entangle them with the doing of ordinary intimacies, and also
with intimate invasions of violence and abuse.
We see important connections between the ideas of queer and femi-
nist theorists of intimate publics, and current debates about the meaning
Introduction    xxi

and value of social media networked publics and communities. For these
reasons, we see the title of this book as a generative frame for scholar-
ship of digital cultures, one we theorise in more detail in the following
chapter. Intimacy, as it is constituted, lived, and commodified in digital
communities and publics, and impacted in particular by social media, is
a topic of increasing international interest. Debates about this are cur-
rently playing out in both scholarly and non-scholarly contexts, across a
range of topics and interests, including identity politics, work and labour,
health, sexuality, death, and everyday life. This collection operates across
and bridges these multiple interests and themes via the frame of ‘digital
intimate publics’.

The Background to this Book


This book began as a coming together of scholars over the past four
years at an annual symposium we’ve come to call ‘Digital Intimacies’.
The first two events were held at the University of Queensland in
2015 and 2016, supported by UQ’s Institute for Advanced Studies in
the Humanities, UQ’s School of Communication and Arts, and the
University of Tasmania’s School of Social Sciences. Several of the essays
in this book originated as papers from those first two symposia.
Following the success of these first two events, another was held in
Melbourne at RMIT in 2017, with support from the Monash University
School of Social Sciences. At the time of writing, another is planned for
2018 at Curtin University in Perth. These symposia have spanned multi-
ple institutions across Australia, and have drawn in more than 100 scholars
over the past four years. A particular feature of the symposia is the gather-
ing of a new formation of scholars, many early-career or emerging, whose
work sits at the intersection of digital cultures and multiple strands of the
humanities and social sciences: cultural studies, sociology, criminology, psy-
chology, media studies, design studies, education, and more. We acknowl-
edge the more recent input from co-convenors of these symposia, Jenny
Kennedy (RMIT in 2017) and Tama Leaver (Curtin in 2018).
The popularity and endurance of this event points toward the signifi-
cant critical mass of scholars doing research on digital mediations of inti-
mate life in Australia and the Asia-Pacific, as well as the critical currency,
importance, and innovation happening in the area of digital intimacies
research across the globe. We hope this book serves as a step in continu-
ing this tradition of research and critical thinking into the future.
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tarvittaisiin rahaa ja isälle pitäisi toimittaa rahaa siitä tuonnoisesta
summasta, jonka vain vähäksi ajaksi lainasin. Rahaa, rahaa, rahaa,
eikä minulla penniäkään… Pahin pula on syömisestä. Rupeavat
palvelijatkin näljissään haukkumaan… Liinasta en välittäisi, nähköön
vähän nälkää, eikö sitte oppisi jotain tekemään. Ja lapsista kyllä isä
pitää huolen, sen tiedän ihan varmaan. Itse minä kyllä elän missä
hyvänsä… Voi sentäänkin, kun en alussa ollut jyrkempi Liinalle ja
pakottanut häntä ihmiseksi. Mutta kuka tuota jaksaa nähdä akkain
itkua ja vaikerrusta, ja säälihän tuota oli ajaakin herrasihmistä heti
läävään, kun muutenkin tuntui elämä olevan hänestä niin vaikea. Ja
se appiukko, rikkaaksi häntä kaikki luulivat, se se juuri minutkin petti,
kun tyttö vielä lisäksi oli niin vietävän suloinen… se ukko jätti meidät
ihan paljain käsin. Kutti, parahiksi, Kalle! kuka käski olemaan sokea
ja kosimaan herrasneittä? Ei kukaan muu kuin oma herruuteni. Nyt
olen hyväkin herra!… Peijakas kun rupee nälkä hiukomaan omaakin
vatsaani; se vain ei katso herruutta eikä narreutta! Mutta loppu tästä
pitää tulla!"

Kauan hän sillä tavalla mietiskellen käveli välistä hitaammin,


välistä taas kiireemmin, mikäli ajatukset milloinkin sujuivat. Unta ei
kuulunut. Aamu jo ehti valjeta hänen yhä astuskellessaan.

Viimein hän teki päätöksensä, pukeutui päällysvaatteihinsa, meni


tampuurin kautta ulos, valjasti hevosen, saman, jolla oli tullut kotiin ja
läksi ajamaan.

Liina yhä nukkui ja vasta hetkisen kuluttua heräsivät palvelijatkin,


tottuneet kun ajan pitkään olivat hekin enemmän makaamaan kuin
työtä tekemään! Renki kiepsahti vähän sukkelammin tavallista ylös
ja alkoi torua piikoja: "nyt teidät hukka perii, kun näin makaatte
selvään päivään asti, vaikka isäntä on kotona!" Mutta karjapiika,
käytyään elukoita katsomassa ja huomattuaan, että isännän hevosta
ei ollut tallissa eikä rekeäkään kotosalla, alkoi tupaan palattuaan
pilkata renkiä, että hän näljissään näki vain unia päivälläkin. Ja
siihen uskoon piiat jäivät, vaikka renki kuinka olisi vakuuttanut
käyneensä yöllä riisumassa isännän hevosen.

Kalle ajoi suoraa päätä Notkolaan. Vaikealta hänestä tuntui mennä


isäänsä yhä kiusaamaan ja vielä vaikeampi hänen oli kuulla isän
suusta jyrkkä vastaus, että oli turha ruveta kahta taloa hävittämään
yhden tähden. Kalle mielessään kuitenkin tunnusti isän olevan
oikeassa, hänhän oli itsekin koko aamun ajatellut samaa, ja nyt hän
ilmasi äsken tekemänsä päätöksen.
Kauan siinä keskusteltiin ja punnittiin asiaa kaikilta puolin.
Notkolan isäntä, huomattuaan poikansa nyt viimeinkin palaavan
väärältä tieltä, kehoitti Kallea vielä koettamaan pitää taloansa
pystyssä, vaan Kalle ei uskaltanut, hänellä kun ei enää ollut
luottamusta itseensäkään.

Aamiaisen syötyä läksi Kalle ajamaan omia teitänsä, ei kuitenkaan


kapakkaan, kuten ennen. Isänsä huusi hänelle vielä jäljestä: "ole
huoletta, kyllä minä korjaan lapset!" ja kyyneliä kiilsi nyt jo
vanhanpuoleisen miehen silmissä.

Mäkelässä palvelijat kyllästyivät odottamaan olematonta aamiaista


eivätkä ilenneet enää mennä lainailemaankaan, vaan karkasivat.
Niinpä Notkolan isäntä päivemmällä tapasi Liinan yksinään lasten
kanssa ja vei heidät kotiinsa. Mäkelän kartanot lukottiin ja elukat
korjattiin myöskin nälkää näkemästä Notkolaan toistaiseksi. Aikaa
myöten otti pankki saatavastaan talon haltuunsa ja irtaimiston veivät
muut saamamiehet.

*****

Tähän nyt kertomus oikeastaan saisi päättyä, sillä johan


arvaamme, että päähenkilöt, joiden elämän vaiheita olemme
seuranneet, olivat auttamattomasti elämänsä mukaista kylvöä
niittämässä ja että heidän lapsensa joutuivat hyviin käsiin. Kuitenkin
huvittanee vielä katsahtaa muutamia vuosia, ehkäpä
kymmenkunnankin eteen päin.

Silloin istui Liina huononpäiväisessä torpassa. Hän näet ei ollut


viihtynyt Notkolassa, jossa toisten uutteruus oli ikäänkuin ainaisena
pahana omanatuntona häntä rasittamassa, vaikka häntä ei
kovuudella kohdeltukaan, ja hän sen tähden oli lähtenyt omaan
vapauteensa. Huonoa hänen toimeentulonsa sitte oli ja ehkäpä hän
saamattomuudessaan olisi kuollut nälkäänkin, ell'eivät torpan
asukkaat, johon hän asettui elämään, olisi toimittaneet hänelle
syötävää ensin Notkolasta ja sitte kunnan vaivaisvaroista, kuin
Notkolan vanhukset kuolivat ja tila joutui Liinalle vieraampien
haltuun. Työhön oppimisesta ei nytkään tullut mitään. Torpanväen
kätkyitä hän vain kiikutteli ja muisteli ennen nuorempana lukemiansa
romaaneja.

Kallesta kuultiin sen verran, että hän toisissa pitäjissä piti


päällysmiehen ammattia tukin ajoissa ja uitoissa ja ansaitsi rahaa
runsaasti. Mutta Liinalle hän ei lähettänyt penniäkään, sillä viina oli jo
tullut hänelle niin rakkaaksi, että sen alttarille hän uhrasi joka
roponsa. Humalapäissään hän kuitenkin joskus kiroeli omaa
tyhmyyttänsä; koko tuo naimisissa olon aika häilyi hänen mielessään
vain pahana unena. Toimen miestä hänestä ei enää koskaan tullut,
siksi oli hänen oma tahtonsa jo vallan uupunut, ja oikea avun lähde,
niin se häneltä oli unhottunut jo ammoin ennen, kuin hän
herrasmaisuuden ja himon orjaksi joutuikaan.
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