71 Behaviour

Response Prompts
Supporting you to feel more calm and
confident when addressing challenging
behaviours restoratively.
 A quick intro
Responding to challenging behaviour calmly and restoratively in the heat of the
moment is tough! My aim through these prompts is to support you in feeling more
calm heading into your classroom, and more confident in having something up your
sleeve even if you are met with a big “I wasn’t even doing anything, they were!!”

How to use this guide:

1/ Choose your favourite one (or two) from each category.

2/ Practice them in the day to day until they become hardwired.
3/ Choose a few more! Rinse, repeat!

Please remember that every single situation is so nuanced, so you have to choose
what works best for that student, on that day. Also be mindful that non-verbals will
always trump what we are saying. It’s all in the delivery, so before approaching your
students about their behaviour, be sure to regulate so you can respond, rather than
react.

Sending all my best to you, teacher friends!

hey there!
I'm Claire.
I am passionate about providing you with the actionable support
you need to reduce, respond to, and resolve challenging
behaviours holistically and effectively.

If you would like to get in touch, please contact me on:

claire@the-unteachables.com

For more support:

www.the-unteachables.com

Find me on instagram: @the.unteachables

Listen to The Unteachables Podcast

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 Responding to initial
behaviour challenges

try:

1/ “Are you okay?”

2/ “What is going on for you?”
3/ “I can see you’re angry, what is happening for you right now?”
4/ “Is there anything I can help you with right now to get you back
on track?”
5/ “Do you understand what we are doing at the moment?”
6/ “Do you need help?”
7/ “Has something happened that I am unaware of?”
8/ “What do you think I am going to ask you to do now?”
9/ “What do you think is important for you to do right now?”
10/ “It’s not too late to turn this around and have a great lesson,
here let me show you what we are doing.”
11/ “I am going to check back in in 5 minutes to see if you need any
help.”

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 Responding to blame
or pushback

try:

12/ “Yes I can see other students are also talking, what should we
all be doing right now?”
13/ “Why do you think I might be speaking to you first and not
them?”
14/ “I will be addressing them, but right now I am talking to you.”
15/ “Why might I be talking to you specifically?”
16/ “Whose learning am I talking about right now?”
17/ “I will be speaking to them/addressing them in a moment,
but what might I need from you right now before I move on to
do that?”
18/ “Can you control what they do? Whose behaviour can you
control then? Yes, your own.”
19/ “Whose behaviours are you responsible for?”
20/ “Whose behaviours aren’t you responsible for?”
21/ “What are you responsible for right here in this class?”
22/ “What might I need from you right now?”

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 Taking the discussion
out of the moment

try:

23/ “I’m going to go and teach the rest of the lesson now, I can see
you need a bit of space. I will talk to you about this after.”

24/ “Okay this discussion is going to need more time than what we
have right now, so I am going to continue teaching the lesson and I
will speak to you after.”

25/ “Let’s continue this talk after the lesson, when I can give you my
full attention.”

26/ “I’d love to talk to you more about this, please stay back after. It’s
not a punishment, I just want to make sure we are on the same
page because I am quite worried about you at the moment.”

5
 Starting the conversation,
checking-in, and gaining buy-in:

try:
27/ “Are you ok?”
28/ “Is everything okay? You didn’t seem your usual self.”
29/ “Today was a bit of a tough one?”
30/ “What were you thinking and feeling at the time?”
31/ “What was happening for you at the time?”
32/ “Is there anything I need to be aware of?”
33/ “Do you feel picked on during lessons? I am really sorry if that is
the case. I’d love to hear you out so we can understand each other
better.”
34/ “Can you explain to me what was going on for you during the
lesson?”
35/ “That was a very difficult lesson/situation, can you explain why
that might be?”
36/ “Did something happen outside of the lesson?”

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 Unpacking the behaviour
and raising accountability

try:

37/ “Was that helpful or unhelpful? To whom?”

38/ “Is this benefitting your learning?”
39/ “Did that make whatever was going on for you better or worse?”
40/ “Why do you think what you were doing and what they were
doing was different?”
41/ “How do you think this may have impacted the lesson?”
42/ “When I have you and other students calling out, why might that
be challenging during the lesson?”
43/ “Whose learning is harmed through this?”
44/ “When I write your school report, when I grade your papers,
when I speak with your mum and dad, whose name will I be using?
Yes. Your name. It’s about your behaviours, not about the others in
the room.”

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continued...

Unpacking the behaviour

and raising accountability

try:

45/ “Can I give you a clue?”

46/ “Can I make a suggestion?”
47/ “Can I explain what was happening from where I was standing?”
48/ “What happened beforehand?”
49/ “Do you understand why the things you said are serious? Can
you explain that to me in your own words?”
50/ “Who do you think these comments and behaviours hurt and
how?”
51/ “What was the impact on me/ the class/your own learning?”
52/ “Who do you think this affected? Yes, it also affected you, you
deserve to learn and to do well as much as anybody else.”

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 Making a plan and
resolving the behaviour:

try:

53/ “What might we do next time this happens?”

54/ “What can we do differently next lesson?”
55/ “Can we think of some strategies for when you are feeling like
this?”
56/ “How do we make things right from today?”
57/ “May I offer a suggestion also?”
58/ “Even if we are feeling angry and unhappy, we still need to make
sure we aren't causing harm to others or our environment. What
way do you think you can make this right?”
59/ “What do you think I am going to ask you to do next? Clean it up.
Yes exactly right. Thank you.”
60/ “What can we do differently next time?”
61/ “What do you think I am going to need from you next lesson?”
62/ “How can we quickly fix this up?”
63/ “I know it was a really hard lesson for you, how about we fix this
together quickly and you can go off to have lunch.”

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continued...

Making a plan and

resolving the behaviour:

try:

64/ “Next time you're feeling like this, what would be a better
choice?”
65/ “Next time you're feeling like this, is there anything you need
from me so you can make a better choice?”
66/ “Can I suggest a strategy? Would that be ok?”
67/ “I am going to be calling home and just letting them know what
we discussed and what the challenges were today, I will also let
them know just how well you did in resolving this!”
68/ “What is the plan for our next lesson?”
69/ “Can you repeat the plan for me just so I know that we are both
on the same page?”
70/ “You should be proud of how you have reflected today.”
71/ “We all struggle with things from time to time, how we work
through them and resolve them is what matters.”

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You’ve got this!

contact:
Claire@the-unteachables.com
www.the-unteachables.com
IG: @the.unteachables