so quite new

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/43721770.

Rating: General Audiences

Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply
Category: F/M
Fandom: Akatsuki no Yona | Yona of the Dawn
Relationship: An Lili/Soo-Won
Character: Han Joo-Doh
Additional Tags: Practice Kissing, Jealous Soo-Won, Oblivious Lili, (lili is very normal
SO normal about all this by the way)
Language: English
Stats: Published: 2022-12-20 Words: 1,971 Chapters: 1/1
 so quite new
by StarAmongStones

Summary

A bored Lili is a dangerous Lili.

Notes

We don't know what Soo-Won and Lili got up to when they spent all their time together in the
castle. You can't prove this didn't happen in canon.

Title is i like my body when it is with your by e.e. cummings.

See the end of the work for more notes

Soo-Won was engrossed in whatever he was reading at the moment and Lili was bored. So
bored. The most bored she’d ever been in her life. Actually, she took that back. Nothing
would ever be worse than the hours spent learning how to be a proper lady. At least with this
boredom, she could lay flat on the ground in Soo-Won’s office, place the book she’d been
reading over her face, and announce, “I’m so bored!”

If she’d done that around her teacher, Eun-Bi would have poked her with a walking stick and
forced her to practice calligraphy until her fingers cramped and she could barely see straight.
Soo-Won, however, simply hummed disinterestedly.

“Entertain me,” she demanded.

“And how would you like me to go about doing that?” he asked.

He obviously expected her to give up on her request. It was raining heavily, a rarity in the
Sky Tribe that had forced them indoors hours earlier and had yet to let up, meaning a walk
around the castle grounds was out of the question. The problem wasn’t either of them getting
wet; it was more that everyone would fuss about them getting dirty or, worse, sick, and Lili
didn’t feel like dealing with all that. If she asked Soo-Won to tell her a story, he’d just read
whatever dry text he currently had open aloud. She knew this because it had happened
multiple times. She knew the strangest tidbits about foreign economic relations.

Lili groaned, directionlessly dissatisfied with her life and hoping her vague vocal displeasure
would lead to Soo-Won having a good idea. Soo-Won ignored her.

It was tragic, really, her life. Someone should write her story. It would certainly be more
interesting and much sadder than the book she was currently reading, in which a woman falls
in love with a man but they can’t be together because he lives on a remote island and she is
too poor to afford the ferry to visit him. The fifth time the woman said, “Would that we could
be together for every sunrise!” Lili got annoyed and gave up on the novel. Thus, her current
state of using it as a mask instead of reading the words on the page. Just be together or don’t.
She didn’t understand why she had to suffer terrible prose for a problem that could easily be
solved via theft.

“Have you ever tried kissing?” Lili asked.

She’d stopped reading just as the two main characters were about to kiss - though they would
almost certainly be torn apart at the last second just like all the other almost moments so far -
and all she felt was over it. But there must have been something she was missing, right? It
was in every book Tetora recommended, and even some she’d found on her own. There had
to be something to it if it was all anyone could talk about. And if he wasn’t going to offer up
any entertainment himself, she was going to choose this as their topic of conversation.

There was a pause before Soo-Won said, voice light with just a hint of nervous laughter,
“Pardon?”
Lili sat up, letting the book fall from her face to land gracelessly on her lap. “Kissing. Have
you ever done it?”

“I, uh-” Soo-Won said, “no?”

His smile did not look comfortable. The tilt of his eyebrows was all wrong. Plus, there was
the fact that he was smiling at all. The most she’d ever seen from him was a small quirk of
the lips that she had interpreted as fond , and that hadn’t even been directed at another person.
It had been to a cat who let him rub her belly for ten whole seconds before wriggling up off
her back and out into the gardens again. Over the months spent with him, she’d learned that
he only ever smiled when he was either faking hospitality or trying to politely redirect
someone’s energies. This, of course, just made her want to pursue the topic even harder.

“Have you ever wanted to?” Lili asked.

“Oh, maybe,” he said evasively. “When the time is right. At the moment, I have other
things-“

“You can stop lying,” Lili said, cutting him off. She didn’t know if it was amusing or
insulting that he thought she couldn’t tell he was lying through his teeth. “I don’t think I
really want to, either, but other people seem really interested in it. I wondered why.”

“Oh,” Soo-Won said. He instantly relaxed, shoulders falling away from where they’d crept
upwards and mouth smoothing out to something more thoughtful. It was quite the
transformation.

“Wait,” she said before he could comment on her curiosity, “why do you look so relaxed
now?”

“What’s that?” he asked evasively.

“You were really freaked out just now. What was that about?”

“Nothing at all!” He gave another fake laugh that Lili refused to dignify. She simply crossed
her arms in front of her chest and waited for him to fess up.

Sensing it was a lost cause, he gave an inaudible sigh, then said, “I thought you were going to
ask me to do it.”

“Do what?”

She watched, delighted, as a blush spread across his soft, delicate cheeks. She had no idea
why her question had inspired such a reaction, but it was always a good day when she could
mortify the man to this point.

“Kiss you,” he forced out.

What? It took her a moment to piece together the broken fragments of his side of the
conversation, but when they clicked, she asked, “You thought I was asking you to kiss me?”
and then fell over with the force of her laughter.
“Okay,” he said softly.

“That’s hilarious,” she said, still very much laughing. “Why would I ever-“

Hold on. Pause. She sat up, abruptly serious, and said, “That’s not a bad idea.”

“Oh no,” was all Soo-Won said.

“You should kiss me.”

“I really shouldn’t.”

“We’ll finally get to see what all the fuss is about,” she said, ignoring him. “At the very least,
we’ll get some practice enduring it, I guess, for people we actually like.”

“No,” he said.

She groaned, but his refusal wasn’t surprising. He really, obviously didn’t want to kiss her if
the earlier part of their conversation was anything to go by. That was fine, though. She didn’t
really want to kiss him either. She just needed someone.

She stood, tossed her abandoned book on a nearby table, and said, “Fine. I’ll go see what
Joo-Doh’s doing.”

“Joo-Doh?” Soo-Won asked.

“Sure.” Lili shrugged. “He’s single.” Plus, they might yell at each other for a little bit and it
was always fun to rile up Soo-Won’s staff.

“You’re going to ask Joo-Doh to kiss you,” Soo-Won said.

“Yep,” Lili said. Then, “See ya.”

She made it about four steps before a hand caught her elbow. Soo-Won turned her back
towards him and cupped her jaw with his free hand. She just barely registered that palm
wasn’t as soft as she’d expected before he kissed her.

Oh.

Huh.

So this was what it was like.

It wasn’t unpleasant , she supposed. It wasn’t much of anything at the moment. Just a boy
pressing his face close to hers. Though it wasn’t what she had planned, and though that plan
had been formed less than five minutes ago, she’d be damned if she was going to let this
opportunity pass her by without trying to get some sort of reaction. She moved her lips
against his as he moved his hand from her elbow to her lower back, pulling her in closer and
tilting her head just so and oh .
This was what it was like?

Well, hot damn. It seemed everyone was on to something after all.

Eventually, after an untold number of exploratory kisses, Soo-Won pulled back far enough
for their lips to disconnect. Lili blinked her eyes open to a world in which she knew what
kissing felt like and knew Soo-Won was kind of good at it. It was unfair that he’d picked it up
quickly enough to give her goosebumps, and she would have been more upset if she had been
thinking about anything other than how to get his mouth back on hers immediately right
now.

“Don’t go to Joo-Doh,” Soo-Won said.

She stared up at him, then asked, “Who?” two seconds before she registered what he was
talking about.

His lips quirked upward in a small, rare, real smile. It was probably a good thing that he
didn’t really smile at anyone because that thing was dangerous . Her heart gave a painful
thump in her chest knowing that smile was meant for her, not some random cat that had
wandered into his path. If it made him smile at her like that, she’d never remember Joo-Doh
again. It wouldn’t be much of a loss, anyway. He wasn’t old enough to interest her.

He stroked his thumb across her cheek, grounding her in the moment, and said, “Don’t ask
Joo-Doh to kiss you.”

“I’ll do whatever I want,” she said. It was a token protest at best, and they both knew it. “But
you did a very thorough job of it, so I don’t need to ask anyone else for now.” She punctuated
her statement with a friendly punch to his arm that she had never attempted before and never
would again.

He glanced down at where she’d struck him, amused, before finally letting her go. The loss
of his warmth as he stepped back made her goosebumps return for less pleasurable reasons. It
was embarrassing how needy she was being at the moment. Over a boy who was obviously
unaffected by all this. Over Soo-Won . Unacceptable. She dusted off her pride, raised her
chin, and said, “Good work today.”

“You as well,” he said, clearly trying not to laugh at her.

They were saved from any more awkwardness by four terse knocks at the door. Delighted to
have an out for the frankly horrifying conversation at hand, she moved to open it and found
Joo-Doh staring back at her.

"I no longer require your assistance," she said in lieu of a normal greeting.

Joo-Doh blinked at her, then said, "What."

"Joo-Doh," Soo-Won said from behind Lili. "What can I do for you?"

"I have a few things to discuss if you have a moment," he said, sparing Lili a vaguely
judgmental glance.
She was aware of her reputation amongst the members of Soo-Won's inner circle staying
close to the castle. Since they saw her day in and day out, they were under the impression that
all she did with Soo-Won was convince him to slack off, which, like, she wished. He was
stupidly dedicated. She would eat her own hair before she admitted she admired that tenacity
in him, but damn, someone had to get him to have fun before he pulled a muscle with how
tightly he was wound. If he thought of her as an annoyance, so be it. As long as Soo-Won's
shoulders were lower than when she found him, she'd let them think whatever they wanted.

"I believe Lady Lili and I were just finishing up here, weren't we?" Soo-Won asked,
motioning for Joo-Doh to come into the office.

This caused her to remember what they'd just finished up, which instantly made her face heat,
which annoyed her deeply. She hissed, "Stop that." To him or to herself was anybody's guess.
Through all this, Joo-Doh stared dead-eyed at a wall and ignored them.

She'd proposed the whole situation! How was she the one leaving without her dignity? It was
deeply unfair. The only solution, obviously, was to kiss him stupid. That'd show him. Now,
all she had to do was figure out how to get him to agree to a second round.
End Notes

I posted this yesterday on tumblr with a different ending. I couldn't decide who would make
for a funnier disruption.

As mentioned on tumblr, shoutout to sabraeal for talking with me about Soo-Won being
jealous while Lili is oblivious. I am delighted by the thought of it.

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