Sex education and

talking with children

about sex: 0-8 years
PRESENTED BY:
cHRISFANIA PUTRI WARDASARI
NIM 2312320121
Talking about sex
and sexuality with
young children
It’s never too early to talk with your child
about sex. Talking about sex, sexuality and
bodies from when your child is young can
help your child understand that sex and
sexuality are healthy parts of life.
Open and honest conversations when your
child is young can make later
conversations easier. And these early
conversations also lay the groundwork for
children to make healthier choices about
sex when they’re older.
Talking about sex and sexuality with
young children
The key early messages are that your child can come to you
for open, honest and reliable information, and that they
shouldn’t feel scared or embarrassed to ask you about sex
and sexuality.
And the good news is that talking about sex and sexuality
isn’t a one-off conversation that you have to get exactly
right. It’s a conversation that continues and evolves as your
child grows up.
Sexuality isn’t just about sex.
It’s also about your child’s
identity and the way your child
feels about their developing
body. And it’s how your child
understands and expresses
feelings of intimacy, attraction
and affection for others, and
how your child develops and
maintains respectful
relationships.
 Talking about sex:
3 steps
These basic steps can help you talk with your child about sex.
First, acknowledge that your child might be curious and find out
what they already know. For example, ‘Where do you think babies
come from?’ or ‘What have you heard about where babies come
from?’
Second, correct any misinformation and give the facts. For
example, ‘You’re almost right. Babies don’t grow in their mummy’s
tummy. They grow in a special place inside the body, called the
uterus’.
Third, use the conversation as an opportunity to talk about your
own thoughts or feelings. For example, ‘Some people really want
to have a baby when they’re ready. Other people aren’t too sure
about having a baby at all’.
How to talk about sex, sexuality and bodies: tips for all ages
These tips can make it easier to talk with children of any age about sex and sexuality.
Explain things at your child’s level
Explain things at a level your child can understand. For example, a 6-year old won’t want
a long explanation of ovulation, although they might be fascinated to know very small
eggs (or ova) can make a baby.
It’s best to keep your explanation brief, factual and positive. If you can do this, your child
will feel that they can come back to you whenever they want more information.

Use correct names for body parts

It’s best to use the correct names when you’re talking about body parts – for example,
penis, scrotum, testicles, vulva, vagina. This helps to send the message that talking about
these parts of our bodies is healthy and OK. And if your child knows the correct names for
body parts, your child will be able to communicate clearly about their body with you or
people like doctors if they need to.
You can be inclusive of people of all genders by talking about ‘some’ or ‘most’ people –
for example, ‘Some people have penises, and some people have vulvas’.
How to talk about sex, sexuality and bodies: tips for all ages

Say ‘I don’t know’ if you need to.

Your child doesn’t need you to be an expert – your child just needs to know that they can
ask you anything.
If you don’t know what to say, tell your child you’re glad they asked, that you don’t know
the answer, and that you’ll look for some information and get back to them. And then
make sure you do get back to your child. Or you could look for the answer together.
This builds trust and sends the message that you’ll be honest with your child.

Get all parents involved

In families with more than one parent, it’s good for all parents to get involved in
discussions about sex. When all parents are involved, children learn that it’s OK for
everyone to talk about sex and sexuality. This can help children to feel comfortable
talking about their bodies, take responsibility for sexual feelings, and communicate in
intimate relationships when they’re older.
How to talk about sex, sexuality and bodies: tips for all ages
Start a conversation
Some children don’t ask many questions, so you might need to start a conversation. It’s
a good idea to think about what to say beforehand, then pick a good time to talk. For
example, if someone is talking about pregnancy on TV, you could say, ‘They were
talking about pregnancy on the TV earlier. It got me wondering if you know what that
is?’
Some children find it easier to talk without eye contact, so you could plan to talk while
you and your child are travelling in the car.

Prepare yourself
You might feel embarrassed or uncomfortable talking about sexuality, or using words
like ‘penis’ or ‘vagina’ when talking about bodies. That’s OK.
It’s a good idea to prepare yourself by thinking about what you’re comfortable with
and building on that. For example, if you’re OK with talking about bottoms but not
breasts, try using the word ‘bottom’ in conversation to start with. Or you could practise
with another adult.
It’s important for children to know the difference between
touching that’s OK and touching that’s not OK. Make sure
your child knows that they can say ‘No!’ to any touching
that they don’t want and that it’s always OK to tell a
trusted adult about touch that’s not OK. You can start
talking about sexual abuse and talking about consent when
your child is young.
 How to talk about sex, sexuality and bodies: tips for all ages
0-2 years: what to say about sex, sexuality and bodies
You can use everyday moments to help your child learn
about bodies. For example, bath time or while you’re
helping your child get dressed are good times to introduce
the names of body parts.
These can also be good times to send messages about
healthy, natural behaviour. For example, if your child
touches their genitals while you’re changing their nappy,
that’s OK. When they’re older, you can talk about public
and private behaviour.
2-3 years: what to say about sex, sexuality and bodies
Most children aged 2-3 years are very curious about
their own and other children’s bodies. They’ll also notice
that different bodies have different body parts. Your
child might ask you why or say, ‘What’s that?’ You can
teach your child that every body part has a name and its
own ‘job’ to do. For example, ‘This is your vulva’ or ‘Your
penis is where wee comes out’.
Looking at books with your child can help. You can use
the pictures to help your child learn the names for body
parts and understand that bodies are different.
 How to talk about sex, sexuality and bodies: tips for all ages
4-5 years: what to say about sex, sexuality and bodies
Children aged 4-5 years often ask where babies come from. They
can understand that a baby grows in a uterus, and that to make a
baby you need a sperm (like a tiny seed) and an ovum (like a tiny
egg).
If your child asks ‘Where do I come from?’, you could ask, ‘What do
you think?’ This helps you work out what your child is really
asking and how much your child understands. You could give a
simple explanation like ‘Babies grow in a place inside the body
called the uterus’.
If you’re pregnant your child might ask, ‘Where does the baby come
out?’ Give a simple but accurate answer like ‘The baby is growing
in my uterus. When the baby is finished growing, it might come out
through the birth canal, which is called the vagina. Or it might
come out of a cut that the doctors will make on my tummy’.
6-8 years: what to say about sex, sexuality and bodies
By 6 years old, many children are interested in how babies are made
and might ask questions.
If your child asks, ‘How did the baby get into your uterus?’, ask your
child what they think. This helps you understand what your child
already knows. Then you can explain simply, giving as much
information as you’re comfortable with. For example, ‘To make a
baby, a sperm and an egg join together.’
You could explain how this happens when 2 people have sexual
intercourse and how a vagina and penis fit together. It’s also good to
explain that sexual intercourse is something that grown-ups do
when they both want to and that it’s not for children.
You might also like to say that sometimes babies enter families in
different ways, like IVF, adoption, foster care or grandparent care.
You don’t have to wait for your child to ask you a question. You could
start a conversation by asking, ‘Have you ever wondered how you were
born and where you came from?’ Or you might see someone who’s pregnant
and say to your child, ‘They have a baby growing inside them. Do you
know how the baby got there?’

You could also read a book together about where babies come from, like
Mummy laid an egg by Babette Cole.

It’s a good idea to start talking to your child about puberty and how
bodies change in puberty well before your child starts puberty. This
could be when your child is around 6-8 years old.
If your child comes across sexting or pornography, stay
calm. This can be an opportunity to talk with your
child about what is and isn’t OK for children to see.
And talking about these issues is one of the best ways
to keep your child safe online and promote respectful
online behaviour.
Thank you
very much