Air

By: Francisco Botello

I couldn`t take it anymore. It was all too much. I was too angry. He enraged me to the
point oI no return. All I wanted to do was kill him. All I wanted to do was beat his Iace into a
bloody pulp. I hated him completely. At one time he was my best Iriend, now he`s my mortal
enemy. I hate him so, I hate every inch oI his body, and oI his soul. Every last hair on his head.
Every single Iiber oI his being, I just consumed it in hate. God why can the only thing I can think
oI is his death?
I wondered to myselI, could I actually kill him? I mean that would make everything so
much easier. Heck I doubt many people would miss him. I could rest in peace knowing he wasn`t
tormenting and ruining lives. That`s the end oI that, he will die. How though? God, I don`t care iI
I`m caught. I don`t care how. He has to die somehow. He has to be eradicated Irom this world
and pushed out. Ah, just thinking oI him inIuriates me. I doubt anyone would miss him.
Alright, I`ll kill him. I know I`ll kill him, just a matter oI when. How? Where? I cannot
let this drag on. I hate him. He ruins liIe and causes insanity. Should I shoot him quickly and get
it over with? Or hang him somewhere to lie in wait Ior someone to Iind his suIIocated broken
body. Oh thinking about his death thrills me. Maybe I should hang him, it`s just such a
wonderIul way to die. So grand and old Iashioned.
Yes, I`ll hang him. I`ll do it in public too. Display his body so everyone can see what
torment does to a person. So everyone can see what hate and complete abhorrence can do. I hate
him so. Yes yes, he`ll die. And I`ll relish every moment oI it. When the rope is looped around his
neck and he Iears he might actually die, he might even understand the pain. As he drops through
the air, he`ll close his eyes tightly and Iear Ior the death Ior which he rightIully deserves and
wished Ior. I wonder what he`ll Ieel. That twisted bastard might not even Ieel anything. My
entire liIe has been ruined by him. He`s Iucked up the last time.
He`s done it Ior the last time. Let`s see what`ll I need? God I hope he doesn`t come Iuck
it up. Let`s see. Well obviously a rope. Is that it? What about a place? The archway by the
Iountain downtown will do Iine. He will die. I`ll enjoy it.
The noose is set. Its dark, why is there no one out? Probably at the Iestival. Hell they`ll
get a surprise once they come back and see what I`ve done. They`ll Iind his body hanging in the
middle oI town square. He actually didn`t Iuck up this time. He did it right. This time he did
something right! He set a noose. He got ready to kill. This time he`ll actually Iinish something
and have it right the Iirst time. Now I can sleep in peace. Once he`s dead, I`ll be sleeping in
peace.
I Ielt it around my neck. The noose. I did it again, I Iucked up. I can`t please anyone, not
even myselI. I hated myselI so much and pushed myselI here. What am I doing? I might actually
die. Who cares? I don`t. I don`t think anyone does. God, I`m in so much pain. I don`t understand
why. I hate myselI so much, this is what I`ve always wanted. At least I think this is what I
wanted. I don`t even know anymore. What am I doing? The air, it`s rushing through my hair. It`s
cold.
This is what happens when someone is tormented so, when someone is pushed to the
edge. Why are my cheeks wet? That`s just the tears. I`m crying. I don`t know iI I`m ready Ior
this. I thought this is what I wanted. I don`t know anymore. Fuck, I never know. I`m not backing
out. This is the Iirst time I do something right. I Ieel crazy. I`m not crazy, this shouldn`t be
happening. I shouldn`t be laughing at a time like this. I hope no one can see me. I probably look
like a nut standing here ready to jump, laughing with tears Ilowing down my Iace. I`ve always
been a Iool. From the beginning till the end.
I Ielt the wind rushing through my body as I jumped. Mere seconds, as I dropped through
the air. I was aIraid. Fear ran through me like locusts through a Iarm. I was so aIraid, when the
rope runs out oI length, what will I be? I was aIraid oI death and I was going to die. I didn`t want
this. This was insane. My liIe was ending. I didn`t want to kill him. er me. it doesn`t matter
now. My thoughts don`t matter now. God my liIe never mattered. My liIe has been ruined. I
ruined my entire liIe through stupidity. Why am I doing this? I hated my liIe so much, I wanted it
all to end, I couldn`t care less oI the consequences. And here I am, Ialling through the air. My
body came to a sudden stop. My conscience. slipped away. My body swaying back and Iorth in
the air.