Charlie Lawing 176 Laurel Way Apartment 3A Herndon, VA 20170 (703) 376-8389

November 26, 2006

BIRDS TO IT, BEES DO IT, EVEN EDUCATED DADS DO IT BIRTHING BABY NATURALLY IN OLD TOWN by Charlie Lawing

Unfortunately, weespecially in the United Stateshave become increasingly mechanized, so that today we feel very strongly that if we take anything out of human hands and especially out of the human heart and put it through a machine, we have made progress. Ashley Montagu

As I write tonight, the monitor aglow paints peaceful soft shadows on a canvas of walls. Gentle jazzy lullabies swaddle the room, while nesting nearby sweet baby Christieexactly three weeks oldcoos and sighs behind innocent dreaming eyes. How thankful I am that my wife Nikki and I made the very conscious decision to bring our daughter into the world naturallywithout drugs and surgery, without machines and pushy administrators, without doctors barking orders behind masks. Like everyone else in the United States, Nikki and I were born into a culture that medicalizes childbirth, that turns the most natural expression of love into a cold, clinical Lawing Birds Do It, Bees Do It, Even Educated Dads Do It 1

procedure. We understood, then, that our choice to birth naturally would require a measure of confidence, a dose of extra time, and a heap-load of education. Though before Nikkis pregnancy we knew almost nothing about natural childbirth, I have friends who years ago delivered their daughter with the help of a midwife. So when Nikki and I crossed over that thin pink line, we started researching midwifery right away. Thats when we discovered BirthCare. Specializing in attending home and out-of-hospital births and providing personalized gynecological care, BirthCare & Womens Health is a freestanding birthcenter located in Old Town Alexandria. Founded in 1987 by Alice Bailes and Marsha Jackson, within ten years BirthCare midwives were attending 15 to 20 births per month. In 2005, more than 280 babies were born with support from BirthCare. Celebrating their 20th anniversary in 2007, todays BirthCare midwivesAlice and Marsha, Susan Dodge, Regina Foran, and Erin Fulhamare as devoted as ever, putting into practice their philosophy that childbirth is an event which best proceeds when the childbearing woman is the central focus, her health is promoted, she feels safe in her birth environment, and her natural efforts to birth are supported, and when health care for women takes place within the context of a partnership in which the provider and consumer of care have joint responsibility. Indeed, when it comes to natural childbirth, joint responsibility is the key to success, and it includes not only the care provider and mother but the husband (or partner) as well. In fact, when Nikki and I signed on with BirthCare our agreement required that we both attend natural childbirth training. Successive research soon taught us that the Bradley Method, whose natural

Lawing Birds Do It, Bees Do It, Even Educated Dads Do It

approach to childbirth focuses on the avoidance of medications and routine interventions, was the perfect approach for us. Also know as Husband-Coached Childbirth, the Bradley Method, as described by founder Robert A. Bradley, M.D. in 1947, follows the natural instinctual behavior of all mammals in bearing their young. From the very beginning, writes Dr. Bradley, I had included husbands in the birth team as coaches and minimized the role of the physician to resemble that of a lifeguard, who, when watching swimmers, did nothing as long as everything was going along all right. I put the husband . . . at the head of the bed, to capitalize on the lover relationship and found it worked marvelously. After consulting a number of Bradley instructors, we chose Allison Sowell for a twelve-week series of two-and-a-half hour Saturday-morning classes. We could not have found a more motivated, enthusiastic, or better prepared instructor than Allison, who also birthed naturally. It was an amazing experience, says Allison. One of the first things I thought was That was great! Everyone has got to do this! And thats when I decided to become a Bradley teacher. Now I get to help other people have their own amazing birth experiences. Each of Allisons classes has a specific topic covered in detail, and every class always addresses nutrition, exercise, and positive communication and coaching; plus, each week features a new relaxation technique, the heart and soul of the Bradley Method. We also learned from Allison that:

Lawing Birds Do It, Bees Do It, Even Educated Dads Do It

whereas the World Health Organization (WHO) recommends midwives for normal pregnancies and births, out of 4.09 million U.S. births in 2002, only 8% were attended by midwives;

while the WHO recommends out-of-hospital births, 99.1% of babies in 2002 were born in hospitals; though the WHO does not consider electronic fetal monitoring or drugs in labor routine procedures, 85.1% underwent monitoring in 2002 and drugs were administered 80% of the time;

and while the WHO recommends breastfeeding immediately after birth, only 67% of newborns in 2002 were breastfed at birth.

And something that Nikki and I found most surprising (and alarming) is that, according to the Center for Disease Control, over the past ten years Cesarean rates have risen 40%; and statistics from the Virginia Department of Health cite that, depending on the hospital facility, in 2004 Cesarean rates rose as high as 42.54% in Northern Virginia alone, compared with 29.10% nationwide. Determined not to add to those numbers, Nikki and I mounted one last task finding and hiring a birth assistant. Natural childbirth is perhaps the most personal life event some couples will ever experience, so choosing an assistant (also known as a doula)to support the midwife, the mother, and the father during labor and birthcan take some time. But after her first conversation with Lori Stillwagon, Nikki knew Lori was the one. With four daughters and one son born between 1985 and 2003, two of whom were born in hospitals and three at home, and having worked in the natural birth field for 14plus years where she has taught, offered prenatal care for, or attended the births of more than 250 clients since 1992, Loris philosophy about birth appealed to Nikki and me,

Lawing Birds Do It, Bees Do It, Even Educated Dads Do It

especially her observations that each birth is different every time but somehow the same. It is awe-inspiring yet ordinary. It is always unique, always beautiful, always a miracle! With Lori rounding out our team of natural childbirth professionals, at 2:00 a.m. on November 5, 2006 when Nikki woke me with Charlie Bear, I think somethings happening, we both were theoretically prepared. The only question we had now to answer: Could we do it? I knew that Nikki was in-tune with her bodys signals enough to recognize that she was officially in Stage I labor (her contractions increasingly intense and lasting a minute or more). So, as our midwives had instructed, I phoned BirthCares 24-hour operator to contact the midwife on call. When minutes later our telephone rang, Nikki and I wondered who would be on the other end. But because we had visited each of BirthCares five midwives at least twice in the past seven months, we knew that whoever was callingwe would be in more than capable hands. When I answered the phone and heard This is Marsha, we were thrilled. Nikki and I discussed with her the timing of Nikkis contractions, after which Marsha asked if we wanted to start our drive to BirthCare, about one-hour from our home. As first-time parents-to-be, we were tempted to respond Yes! But because our Bradley training had taught us that lengthy and very intense contractions can oftentimes grow shorter and less severe, we decided to focus on relaxation for at least an hour before the journey. When Nikki later became nauseous, however, we couldnt wait any longer. I phoned Marsha then Lori and told them Were on our way. Nikki and I arrived at BirthCare around 8:30 a.m., where Marsha welcomed us and directed us to our birth-room (which resembles a bed and breakfast suite). BirthCare

Lawing Birds Do It, Bees Do It, Even Educated Dads Do It

exudes such a gentle, soothing atmosphere, Nikki and I snuggled into bed right away, knowing that we were safe and at home. As Nikkis contractions grew in severity and duration, so did her nausea. So we decided to accept intravenous feeding (an intervention that the Bradley Method hopes to avoid, but we really didn't want Nikki to get dehydrated). An examination (the first) showed Nikki at 25% effacement (thinning of the cervix), and dilation (widening of the cervix) at 4 centimeters. We were looking forward to 100% effacement and 10 centimeters dilation so that Nikki could start Stage IIthe pushing (and most relieving) phase. But we still had work to do. Marsha suggested that we start walking to move things along. We strolled up and down the hallway, and at one point her contractions grew so powerful that Nikki thought she would not make it through natural birth. But then we remembered our Bradley training: we knew that if we transferred to a hospital for pain medication (BirthCare doesn't administer drugs) there were no guarantees her pain would subside; and we remembered the negative effects that drugs could have on our baby and her mom. So Nikki gritted her teeth and asked if she and I could get into BirthCares hot-tub. Interestingly, the hot-tub had an unexpected effect. It was, of course, soothing; but it also made Nikki's contractions come on super strong and fast. Before we knew it, Nikki couldnt resist the urge to push. Another exam showed her fully effaced and at 9+ centimeters. We got out of the hot-tub and back into the birth-room for the final event. Nikki pushed in nearly every position imaginable, once again thinking she might never make it. But she WE!did make it! No drugs or surgery, no severe interventions

Lawing Birds Do It, Bees Do It, Even Educated Dads Do It

(though her bag of waters would not rupture on its own and needed some prodding), no machines, no pushy administrators, no doctors barking orders behind masks. As soon as Christie's head eased naturally into the world, because Nikki's body and mind were so clean and clear, Christie emitted a delicate cry; her head turned with Nikki's last push, and my daughter looked at me with brilliant, open and aware eyes. The next second, Christie was in Nikki's arms. We were so overjoyed we even forgot to look for her gender. Its Christie, I said when finally I saw. Christie started breastfeeding with zeal. Our baby girl knew exactly what to do. And for Nikki, no episiostomy and no tearing; nothing but a wonderful birththanks to a solid education, healthy diet, steady exercise, and to our friends at BirthCare, all the midwives and staff; and to Allison, Lori, and Marsha, a truly formidable team. Regina Foran, a BirthCare midwife since July 2005, who happened by BirthCare shortly after 4:16 p.m. on November 5, 2006 when Christie Alexandria Lawing was born, once said that she is always amazed, after attending a long labor of 18-26 hours, when the new mothers, instead of complaining, are eager to experience the miracle of birth again. After Nikkis 16 hours of labor, she and I are equally amazed, and totally thrilled. For birthing Christie naturally means not only that our daughter entered this world without drugs numbing her or her mothers senses, but also that she was born without interference in natures ultimate affirmation of life. Just like those other new mothers who Regina admires, Nikki and I are eager to experiencenaturallyour miracle number two.

THE BEGINNING

Lawing Birds Do It, Bees Do It, Even Educated Dads Do It